A Hot Dog Is a Sandwich - Our 2024 Food Predictions

Episode Date: January 3, 2024

Today, Josh and Nicole make their predictions for food trends of 2024! Leave us a voicemail at (833) DOG-POD1 Check out the video version of this podcast: http://youtube.com/@mythicalkitchen To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. I'm looking into my crystal ball and it says espresso martini meatballs. Oh, my crystal ball just has white goo inside. Josh, that's a Cadbury cream egg. Oh. This is a hot dog is a sandwich. Ketchup is a smoothie. Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what?

That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich. A hot dog is a smoothie. Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what? That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich. A hot dog is a sandwich. What? Welcome to our podcast, A Hot Dog is a Sandwich, the show where we break down the world's biggest food debates. I'm your host, Josh Scher. And I'm your host, Nicole Iannietti. And first and foremost, I would like to disavow all fortune tellers as they do not represent my Christian beliefs.

And they are practicing witchcraft technically. So can I tell you something? Sure. One time I went to a fortune teller in Burbank and I drive by that fortune teller office every single day. And every single time I drive by, I say inside of my heart, I was, I experienced witchcraft. I'm like, I can't believe I experienced witchcraft. What did this fortune teller tell you?

Well, at that time, I was working at a boutique marketing agency as a food stylist. And they saw my Tapatio shirt because I was wearing a Tapatio shirt. And they're like, you like food. And I'm like, yeah. And they're like, you like to be creative with food. And I'm like, yeah. Yeah. And that's it. It was to be creative with food. I'm like, yeah. Yeah. And that's it.

It was just a lie. It was a lie. It was $20 and it was a lie. Yeah, I don't believe in all that forms of skullduggery and whatnot. What they do is. It's BS. Yeah, I mean, mediums, fortune tellers, what they do is something called cold reading where they tend to be very good at taking context clues from people and then exploiting that for their own monetary gain. The only fortune teller that I respect are the little slips of paper inside the P.F. Chang's fortune cookies when I go to the P.F. Chang's.

Oh, those are real. That's real, though. That's science. That's science. That's back by science. Technically, it's magnets. Fortune cookies are not magnets. Wait, sorry.

You can't eat magnets. We'll get to the podcast in a second. One more aside. magnets we'll get to the podcast in a second one more aside when i lived with my italian roommates back in college um they're like well astrologia astrology is real and i was like sure man if you believe in anything and they're like no it's science i'm like what do you mean like well when you born the stars okay you know what is magnetism i'm like yeah and they're like well that's why it's science well i well i believe in astrology i do think the day you were born it affects who you are but to to the same degree that everybody born in a certain month within their microcosm i think

within their microcosm of their life. Yeah. You think I have a lot more in common with late April babies than I do with November babies. I'm sure you do. Based on your temperament. I think it's okay. We'll get to the podcast in a second. Let me keep going.

There was, was it Outliers? Are you a tourist? Yeah, yeah. And everybody goes, oh, that makes so much sense. But no, they had my birthday wrong on, I've said this before, I'm going to say it again. They had my birthday wrong on famousbirthdays.com, which really, you know, lowercase f on the famous there. But they said April 15th, which would make me an Aries. And I've gotten so many DMs from people that are like, just looked it up and of course you're an Aries.

And then I'm like, they have my birthday wrong because I'm not that famous. I'm a Taurus actually. That makes even more sense. I've got confirmation bias. Maggie, they have my birthday wrong because I'm not that famous. I'm a Taurus, actually. They go, that makes even more sense. I've got confirmation bias. Maggie, when's your birthday? It's April 10th. I am an Aries, and I totally see that in you, Josh. You are an Aries.

You are so not an Aries. You're such a paladin. Is that a compliment? I don't know. From the island of Paladin. What we're doing today is 2023 is wrapping up. Nicole, we're looking. No, Paladin has one L, Maggie.

Paladin. Not two L's. A Paladin is any of the 12 peers of Charlemagne's court in whom the Count Paladin was chief, of course. You have heroism and chivalry in you, Maggie. Thank you. You're such a Paladin. Okay. What do you want to talk about today?

2023 is wrapping up nicole we saw a lot of food trends come and go happy 2023 we did it another fantastic year of the podcast thank you for all the listeners and all the watchers uh we love you to death and now we are going to effectively give you the knowledge to insider trade in some food trends of 2024 yeah you know because, we saw a lot of trends. Tinned fish, hot girl, tinned fish. Loved the tinned fish craze. Oh, God, I hated it.

I had canned uni. I spent like $20 on canned sea urchin genitals at a restaurant and it was awful. I canned razor clams. I ate like rubber bands. Oh, yeah, that doesn't make sense. I hate the tinned fish thing. It sucks. Well, it's because the tinned fish you're getting maybe is like not good.

No, tinning food was literally invented by Napoleon Bonaparte. Oh, are we going to talk about Napoleon again? So his troops could travel across the Alps to try and sack other European nations. No, nobody wanted tinned food. They had to do it. I like when the cockles are in the tins and you can, they have like a clear. Eat the fresh cockles. I can't get fresh cockles. We can find them. We can't they have like a clear. Eat the fresh cockles. I can't get fresh cockles.

We find them. We can't get fresh cockles. You can get fresh cockles. I cannot. I've had fresh cockles. I've never had a fresh cockle. Dude, bro, I've had fresh blood cockles from Connie Seafood. Well, you're a lucky guy.

Blood cockles, man. Not everybody's so lucky. You had bright red. Yeah, I like, I actually am a big fan of the tinned fish era, but I will say I don't get stuff that's as unique as the things you get. Well, what kind of tinned fish do you like? I'm like a sardine. I'm an anchovy, like monkfish. I like small things.

I like small, normal things. Do you see the tinned fish movement, Nicole, continuing well into 2024? Yeah, because I think there's going to be more hot girls in the world. I think there's going to be more hot girls. And I think they're going to keep advancing the tin fish technology. There's one tin fish that I would really like to see. Which one? Anguilla?

Anguillas? The little? Anguillas from Spain? The little eels? Baby eels? Little baby eels. But it already exists. It looks like it.

No, but I'm saying like come into the States and I want to see a whole artisanal anguillas movement. I want to see canned... I had another... What was it? It was, like, krill. Canned krill. Krill is tiny.

Yeah. Yeah. Tiny little pastes and tins. Because here's the thing. Don't like tinned fish. Love tinned pastes. Oh. I grew up eating a lot of canned pork liver pate.

Like, what do they call it? Deviled ham? Deviled ham. Exactly. Any sort of spreadable meat. And I think, well, here's a prediction for 2024. We're out of tinned fish. We're into tinned spreadable seafood.

I'm talking about we're blending lobster tamale, right? Crab butter in a can. I'm talking about anguilla so you can just mash. I'm talking about krill. Well, I will say that there's been a trend on TikTok of taking foods that are considered scrap and making it into something, you know, beautiful, scrappy. Barnacles. Yeah. I think eating scrap foods and, you know, making that more palatable and popular is a trend we'll probably see in 2024.

100%. I, though, have a, I don't want to say vendetta. That's a pretty strong word. But for this sort of zero waste cooking movement where everyone's like, I'm doing a good thing by using the tops of my leeks. And it's like, you are, sure. And I use all my vegetables because, you know, throw onion skins. I'm cooking for, we're recording this during Thanksgiving.

Deal with it. That's right. You know, cooking for Thanksgiving. I'm cooking for Thanksgiving. We're recording this during Thanksgiving. Deal with it. That's right. You know, cooking for Thanksgiving. I'm throwing the onion skins, the parsley stems. That goes in a stock for the gravy. Do you really keep it? Not on a day-to-day. Not on a day-to-day.

But when I'm making something like Thanksgiving and I need stock, you know, but I just, yeah, who's making their own stock all the time? Hot broth girls. Fair. But, like, not throwing your onion skins is not even like shooting a bb gun at an oncoming tank yeah it's literally just like trying to spit on the tank to stop it you know what i mean yeah it's absolutely nothing and so i all these little scrap food movements on tiktok i think are very cute and resourceful and on an individual level if that

is important to you yes for your own lifestyle that's perfectly fine it's not gonna reverse global warming no no we don't expect that to happen i think some people do and it it bothers me yeah people who are like remember you used to get mad at me for drinking out of straws no i didn't get mad at you for drinking out of bs i got mad at you because we would go to restaurants and they would serve us water and you would look the server in the face and you would just go, I'd like a straw, plastic. No, I would say please. I'm so sorry. Do you have any plastic straws, please?

I wouldn't say it like that. No, you were performative. You made a show of it. Because it's easier to drink out of a plastic straw. You looked at a server at Rafi's in Glendale and you said, I want a turtle to have this shoved up their nose. You said that. You said that. I love turtles.

I love turtles. I like turtles. Other trends that we saw come and go. The rise of disco cocktails is big in 2023. You know, yeah, that's true. Retro, simple cocktails, the espresso martini. None more than that. Yeah, you know what I want to come back?

Ma? The porn star martini. Tell them about the porn star martini. It's a modern classic, right? I'm going to Google it really quick. So I believe the porn star martini is a modern classic that was invented, I'm going to guess, early 2000s, late 90s. Yeah, it's a 2000s cocktail. Yeah, and it's, what is it, passion fruit and vanilla?

Yeah, and it's, was it passion fruit and vanilla? It's a passion fruit vanilla drink. And they put a little side of Prosecco for you to drink on the side. And let me tell you, I saw my friend. No, I'm sorry. It was my cousin's wife's sister in New York. I'm drinking this. And she's like, porn star martinis on a Thursday or something like that. And I saw it.

It's a cool drink. I saw it and I Googled it and I'm like, oh my god, these are my favorite flavors. Passion fruit's my favorite fruit. Did you know that? No, I did not know that. Passion fruit's my number one favorite fruit of all time, followed closely by, uh, pulots. Pluots. Is that how you say it? Yeah. Did you say pulots? Pluots. Pluot. Pluot. It's the plum

in an apricot. Yeah, I like pluots. Well, technically a plumcot is a plum in an apricot. And I believe a pluot is like three parts plum to one part apricot genealogically. I love it. I love it. So passion fruit, vanilla, and then a little side of, you know, bubbles. This is literally like it was made. It's a maximalist drink.

It was made in a lab for girls like me. You know what I mean? Okay, so a lot of, like, the rise of these disco cocktails, espresso martini, I associate that a lot with, like, I don't know when it was invented. But just that kind of, like, 70s, you know, kind of, like, party vibes cocktails were a little bit too sweet. And espresso martini, it's not a martini at all. Espresso martini. It's just served in a martini glass. It's served in a martini glass, right?

Which makes people think it's cool and fancy. But now there's this sort of ironic retro chuggy appeal to it. Oh, my God. You said the word. I know. And the chuggiest thing you can do is say chuggy. Well, no. Here's the thing.

Being chuggy is cool now. Oh, what? Okay, so hear me out. Pornstar martini is like an early 2000s drink, right? I want to bring back early 2000s drinks like buttery nipples. Buttery nipples. Lemon drops., right? I want to bring back early 2000s drinks like buttery nipples. Like I want... Buttery nipples! Lemon drops. Like I want those to come back.

Well, so, this leads me into a good point. The fact that all the kids are wearing these like band t-shirts and not just like, when I was growing up, Nirvana, Led Zeppelin, I'm trying to think what other band t-shirts were popular, but it was kind of like the classic rock kids would wear them. Yeah, I used to wear them.

And then some earnest people who were wearing like Fall Out Boy shirts. But now the most common shirt that I have seen kids freaking wear, and this trips me out, do not know how they rose to prominence, are the Deftones. Oh, yeah, the Deftones and Slayer. You've seen Slayer shirts? I've seen a lot of Slayer shirts and a lot of Deftones.

The kids love Deftones. I listen to Deftones. I listen to Slayer. I don't listen to Deftones and Slayer. You've seen Slayer shirts? I've seen a lot of Slayer shirts and a lot of Deftones. The kids love Deftones. I listen to Deftones. I listen to Slayer. I don't listen to Slayer. Deftones isn't my favorite from that era. Like, we're talking, like, early 2000s, new metal. Like, I'll go back to, like, System of a Down a whole lot. Korn.

System of a Down. You know what I mean? Yeah. But the fact that, like, Deftones shirts are popular, I think, says that Pornstar martinis can make a comeback from the same era. I'm so excited. But my thing that I want can make a comeback. They're from the same era. But my thing that I want to make a comeback, and this was sparked when I went to South Africa last year and I saw the possibilities, Jägermeister.

Jäger? Jäger! Hear me out. Hear me out. I don't think I've ever had Jäger touch my lips. What the effing eff, dude? I don't think I've ever had Jäger. You've never done a Jägerbomb? Never. No, Little John. Not a single J a Jaeger bomb? Never. No, Little John. Not a single Jaeger bomb. I have not Little John. What about a Jaeger

bomb? No, but I love that video. Such a good video. There's so many fun ways. It was part of pop culture. Yeah, yeah. And that pop culture's coming back. I never imbibed a single lick of it, but I had a girlfriend that that was her drink. Like she would finish like a bottle on her own. I'm like, go, Crystal, go.

It's so funny because Jägermeister, it became the official liquor of douchebags sometime in the early 2000s. Can we say douchebags on the podcast? Of course we can say douchebags. It's a medical device. But. It is? Oh, yeah, it is. It is.

Medical device. All right. But Jägermeister, to the company of Jägermeister, they're like a delightful German digestif made with 100 aromatics or whatever. And if you divorce yourself, if you were to pour Jägermeister into a fancy like digestif bottle. Yeah, you wouldn't know. No, completely different. But now it's so tainted with the, you know, I drink. I used to drink down Monster Energies Halloween freshman year, Santa Barbara.

I drank six Monster Energies with two shots of Jaeger in each Monster Energy. And you were 21 years old. Yes, I was 21 years old. Yeah, I was a late bloomer. I went on my LDS mission to Guam. Oh, nice. And then I came back. Yeah.

But the point is, we associate it with moments like that now in our lives because of a successful marketing campaign. Yeah, it was a partying. It was a partying drink. But now we're flipping it, baby. Jägermeister's fancy again. It's what again? It's going to be fancy again. I went to a hipster bar in Brooklyn and they made a really delicious Jägermeister cocktail that had like peanut orgeat in it and like pineapple, like tapache and, you know, rum and Jaeger.

Cool. And I think we're going to go full circle. We're, I think, getting dumber and dumber as a culture. And I think that is a response to the fact that we all studied really hard. And now there's a credential race, right? More people have college degrees than ever. But they ain't working. But they ain't working because we realized that, oh, maybe if everybody had a college degree, then they didn't really mean anything.

And that life is simply how much more accomplished you are than the next person. I had to kind of explain that to my parents and they're like, huh? Yeah. Yeah, they didn't really get it. That's the thing. And so I think now we're like, oh, that didn't make us any happier or afford us houses and be able to have children. So we're going to get dumber. And I fully agree with it.

Post-intellectual bimbo era, Jägermeister's coming back, Pornstar Martini's coming back. Let's hit it. Okay, I'm down. Let's do it. Next time we go out, let's order two Pornstar Martinis and then two Jäger Bombs. Let's do it, Josh. Yeah. I'm also going to thin out my eyebrows and start listening to

Dirty by Christina Aguilera. I love that, dude. I literally just, I bought a Puka Shell necklace. Oh my god. We are living our 2002 Rock of Love Bret Michaels era. I have two Puka Shell necklaces now. Do you layer them? What? No, I don't.

Loser. Other food predictions. Other food predictions. I had one. Okay. I had one. You say one and then I'll say one. All right.

I have two. Yak butter at Starbucks. Okay. Expand. I'm so glad you you asked me to okay so starbucks is obviously taking a lot of liberties from different parts of the world right like we've seen the cold foam on top of the ice coffee yeah i have cold foam in my cup right now you're cool and i think that was a reference to the cheese tea that we saw in like hong kong sure yeah right yeah that cheese foam which is the word cheese foam would have turned off american audiences would have turned off

american audiences so but we're like hey the image of just thick heavy foam on top of an iced drink is very very appealing i love it i love drinking the coffee through the foam i think i love it then starbucks is like oh uh i think taking a little bit of inspo from the bulletproof coffee movement of like adding butter to your stuff. And everybody seems to think that eating a ton of fat for you is like is really good for you. I think it's good for your brain. I think I think it's people say it makes you. I don't I don't know. I don't know the science behind it.

Again, spoonful of ghee like multiple mornings when I was a kid. Did it make me smarter? I don't know. But they say like, you know, MCT oil and stuff is good for brain development and function. I don't know if it's real. I don't know what's real anymore. Nothing's real. That's why we get dumber.

We drink Jager bombs and we wear puka shell necklaces and we listen to Come My Lady, Come Come My Lady, Be My Butterfly, Crazy Town, Come On The Show, man. Shifty Shell Shock. Come On The Show?. Be my butterfly. Crazy town. Come on the show, man. Shifty shell shock. Shifty shell shock. Come on the show. I hope he responds. Okay.

Anyways, now they're adding, you know, they got the oligato with the olive oil on there. I think the next iteration of that, Nepalese yak butter. Okay. Here's the thing. What's that? The Sherpas, they would wake up and drink pu-erh tea. Love pu-erh tea. Which is another one of my trends that I think has come back. Really? Okay. Freaking love pu-erh tea. Love pu-erh tea. Which is another one of my trends that I think has come back.

Really? Okay. Freaking love pu-erh tea. Yeah, me too. It is earthy. It is almost saline. It is just freaking heady and good. I don't know if you know this, but my dad used to go to China like four times out of the year back before the pandy hit.

Yeah. And he would bring back just so much pu-erh tea. It seems like a brick too. Yeah, yeah. It is incredible. Add yak butter to that, and that, I believe, in the Sherpa culture

was just like, hey, breakfast. This is fatty. It's hearty. We got a long day at work. Get some high-quality calories in your system. I think yak butter's

coming to Starbucks. I think they're going to figure it out. I think they're going to start their own yak farms. Howard Schultz is going to start farming yaks up near Olympia, Washington.

Boom, Starbucks yak butter. And I am in. I got one. The resurgence of peasant food. Yes. Do you agree? But not like cool peasant food. No, no, no.

Brown? Not like cassoulet. Cassoulet is like peasant food, but it's cool and they made it fancy. No, I want bowls of brown brothy liquids and some sort of starch and some sort of green thing maybe on the side. Barley boiled in water, thinned out with sawdust. That's what I want. Have you heard of a restaurant called Cafe Mutton in New York?

No. It was one of the 101 best restaurants on a New York Times list. So it was one of the 101 best restaurants on like a New York Times list. And I look at their – I follow them on Instagram and I look at their menu every single day. This restaurant is doing the most innovative, cool peasant food I've ever seen. I'm going to pull up a menu right now. Yeah, pull up the peasant food. And let me tell you, they do incredible things like Like, they just say, like, boiled potatoes with roe. Like, that's a menu item of theirs.

And let me see. Boiled potatoes. Wait, hold on. Hear me out. Boiling potatoes is simply the best way to cook them. I love boiled potatoes. I love boiled potatoes. I love boiled potatoes.

Boiled potatoes in a liquid that tastes good, that is excellent. Okay, let me tell you some of the things that are on this menu. Stuffed duck neck with pickles and mustard. You got all the parts of the duck that you could've used and you took the neck. Yeah, boiled potatoes with sour cream and trout roe. Like, super easy.

Like, what else do they have? They have like buckwheat cake with butterscotch. Who's eating buckwheat? Like, I love this type of food, you know, brown, good, hearty food that makes your soul just jump with glee and you're ready to take on the next challenge. That kind of food I want to see on more menus. I'm tired of all these fancy, small, pretty plates. Just give me a bowl.

Keepin' bowl of brown. Keepin' bowl of brown. Keepin' bowl of brown. I want to see it more and I want to see it done well and I know that the ladies at Cafe Mutton are killing it. There's a really weird thing

that, so heirloom vegetables are fancy, right? I don't want them anymore. Well, so, I don't want, I want smart and final

vegetables. No, you can't get buckwheat at smart and final. Buckwheat is like an heirloom strain of wheat, right? That before refined flour. What I'm saying is an heirloom strain of wheat, right? That before refined flour.

What I'm saying is these heirloom vegetables, right? So cauliflower, for instance, you get heirloom purple cauliflower. Okay. And that's like, wow, cool, fancy. You go to a restaurant, you go to a wedding that has purple cauliflower steamed on there. You go, ooh, a little bit fancy, elevated, whatever. Back in the day, horticulturists literally bred the color out of cauliflower to make it pure white so it was fancier. The pure white cauliflower was the fancy cauliflower it turned into.

And now we've decided that, no, we don't like that cauliflower. Going back to the peasant cauliflower, that was purple. I'm down. We're just running in circles around here. Well, yeah, that's how it works. All the stuff you— Mark Twain said that cauliflower is just, what is it, cabbage that went to a boarding school? Oh.

I agree. Okay. Cabbage. Bring cabbage. Nah, cabbage already had its moment like six years ago. Cabbage had its... No, no, no. Actually, I've been seeing a lot of braised cabbage dishes

on my timeline. There's been... And I've eaten braised cabbage at restaurants. I don't like it. Well, okay, so I had... There are a couple formative moments in restaurants specifically trying to go back to like,

quote unquote, simple food, but then just ultimately kind of sucking. So I went to, I was a Michelin star chef, Josiah Citrin had two Michelin stars at a spot called Mali. From the least. Yeah, very formative

in the Los Angeles fine dining movement. But he decided that like, hey, times are changing. I just want to open up a freaking steakhouse with like honest, you know, wood-fired grilled meats and vegetables. It was called citrine? It was called charcoal.

Charcoal. Oh, in Venice? And I remember a plate of French fries was $16. I was like, dog, I don't think you know how to price food anymore. Yeah. And again, love this guy's food. And that restaurant's really great. But they had a dish that was just cabbage that was just like grilled.

And then it was served with like a yogurt sauce. And I remember being there with a bunch of other food critics at the time they all ate it and i was like oh it's such a pure representation i'm like dog it's a cabbage what was it like eating with those people all the time was it honestly fun or did you feel like you had to like no it was a it was a uh a little pee pee measuring contest all the time and i felt sick and do you now do you now enjoy eating with, like, us when we go out to, like, dinner, like, once a quarter? I love it. Do you prefer it because you don't feel like

you have to, like, put on a show? Absolutely, yeah. And not to say everybody. So I used to work in magazines, and we're in kind of half a food critic. I would have to put my name under an alias. It was Thorbjörn Jakobsson, traveling Norwegian fiber-opt optic cable salesman.

But I used to have to review anonymously. And then anytime I'd go out and eat with, you know, the crew of like 10 or so other like professional food writers in Los Angeles. I was also young at the time, so I was probably trying to put on airs. Okay. But, you know, everybody was just documenting. And I remember every conversation being like, hey, man, have you gone to this place? They're doing fermented bao from a southwest Indonesian region

that you've never heard of. Yeah, yeah, that's cool. But have you been to this place? They're doing, and it was everybody sort of trying to one-up each other on what cool food they found and then ultimately like not enjoying the food as much. Yeah.

And so I really appreciate the ability to go shut my brain off and just vibe and eat and drink. Good. I'm glad you deserve it. Not take pictures. Take pictures of food. That's out.

Remember, we sketching your food is in 2024. Phone eats first. Yeah. Sketching food is in. It's in right now. Julia made me. I think I told you about this. It was when the pandemic hit.

She as a gift for my birthday. she's a very talented illustrator. Your fiancé? She's super artistic. Her grandfather's an artist. I had no idea she was an artist. I'll show you the piece that she did. She drew all of our favorite dishes that we'd ever eaten at restaurants together. That's so cool.

The Lucali pizza that we had. The matzo ball soup from Bertie G's, Hong Kong curry toast from Nightshade, and she drew them all and kind of made a mosaic, and it was really beautiful. That's really sweet. Sketching your food is in, taking pictures of your food is out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, if we're talking about actual food predictions, all the ones are just about catastrophic climate change, and what are we going to do? Oh, eat bugs. Oh, hydroponically grown algae. I'm telling you, I'm telling you, just give me a pill so I don't have to think about it anymore. I'm a huge proponent of us as food creators. Yeah.

No longer eating food. Oh. I think people that are in the food industry should no longer eat food anymore and just use it as a creative vehicle. So food waste isn't a problem anymore. Oh, that's interesting. And then all of our needs. It's like Soylent. Yeah.

But like in pill form. It's like a deaf musician, right? It's like you can create it, but you can't consume it. I want that out of my life for the next year or so. Do you find food a burden at this point? Sometimes I do. Yeah. Yeah.

Sometimes it's exhausting. I get it. It feels obnoxious that we have to feed ourselves not only every day, but multiple times a day. Sometimes two snacks. Yeah. It's kind of BS. Yeah. It's kind of BS. And I just I just wish there was like a like I could snap my fingers and it could be in front of me, which, you know, you can do that. We live in a very privileged society where we could, you know, do do a meal delivery services and, you know, stuff like that. But I have the money, the time, you know, I don't want to spend the money. What I've been doing is. Pill, give me a pill. Now, my version of a pill is I'll cook five pounds of chicken breast and like a couple of heads of broccoli.

Yeah, that's good. I don't actually meal prep. Well, so this is uniquely for prepping for Thanksgiving because I want all of my creative time and energy to be put into this insane meal that I'm making. And so I've been on an austerity diet where. What is an austerity diet? Where I'm eating just enough chicken and broccoli to survive. And then all of my other calories are coming from tasting all of the delightful

stuffings and fillings and sides and practice rounds of kimchi pajeon that I'm trying to make. And so that's my version of a pill is just chicken breast. Here's the thing I should. I really like this early 2000s food trend resurgence to make a comeback. And there is one product that we would always get from the gas station that I would love to make a comeback. French bread pizza. No, wait. Hold on.

Gorilla Pies in North Hollywood is doing French bread pizza, and it is diggity-dank. I got one hungover. Shout out to Gorilla Pies. But no, it was like beef jerky, except it was powdered, and it was in like a snooze can, like a can of dip. Oh, it was like dip. Yeah, it looked like dip. Dip jerky? They banned it because kids were, you know, training

them to use chewing tobacco. But just having powdered protein that you can discreetly fit in your pocket and suck down anytime. That's good. That's great. I like that too. Artisanal Dulake A. Punang Curry meat dip. You know, meat chew, meat snooze.

Make Zin's packets with the meat. Oh my God. Are kids doing that now? Zins? Not kids. I mean, like, are people of age doing that now? What, Zins?

Yeah. For the first time, I saw somebody in the wild put in a Zins packet. Tell the people what Zins are. Zins are packets of chewing tobacco, but they are not tobacco. It is vapors to cigarettes as zins are to snus. Snus is the brand that I know because I lived with a bunch of Scandinavians in college. And boy, do they love snus. And Copenhagen brand.

Don't do tobacco. It's bad for you. It's really bad for you. Ooh, tobacco flavored foods, though. I'm not down. What? We tried that. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. We did that. We did that. We did that. I think you poisoned yourself. Other colors? No. Oh, I did poison myself a little bit.

Don't do that either. One food. here's just an earnest one what that i really want to make like a hard charging like shit i should be able to get it everywhere chat various forms of indian chat okay right um spot called vick's chat house up in berkeley they got all the kinds of chat you know you go to you go to Punjabi Daba in Bakersfield. They had samosa chot, Nicole. Chot is any variety of Indian snack that is typically covered with something crispy. And then all of the green chutney, the sweet tamarind chutney, some sort of yogurt-y situation. And it's great.

And we need more chot. Okay. Screw Smash Burgers. Belpuri stands. Make more chat. You know? Papri chat. Okay. I want to see more cool vinegars. I've been seeing a lot of cool vinegars. I want to see more. I want to see some... We've made

all the vinegars. No, we haven't. We've made all the vinegars. All the vinegars, Nicole, all the vinegars that could exist already exist. That's not true. What vinegars that don't exist that you want to see? Okay, so there's this really trendy one and it's called Ocean Vinegar by a brand named Tart. I's not true. What vinegars that don't exist that you want to see? Okay, so there's this really trendy one, and it's called Ocean Vinegar by a brand named Tart. I want to see. Wait, what's ocean? What the hell is ocean vinegar? It's a Maine

Kombu Bladderwack and Irish Sea Moss. I want to see a desert vinegar. I want to see notes of sand and, I don't know, some sort of palm tree. I like this biome-based flavor profiles you're talking about. Yeah, yeah. Taiga.

I want to see a tundra and a taiga vinegar. Like you put some like choconosle, prickly pear? Yeah. You and I have both been to the conference that legitimately tried the Expo. We went to a conference together? No, not together. I think we've been to, it's called Natural

Products Expo. It's called Expo Westo west yeah i've been to expo west like 15 times they literally that's their whole goal is trying to like sort of predict the future food trends and i remember being violently disappointed by so many food products vegan canned lobster not great nope a big thing that i was uh on was uh raw maple water oh right you tap the tree instead of boiling down to syrup you just drink it. Turns out it tastes bad. I was just hanging out at the Chobani booth. They spent like three mil on that booth.

I was just chilling in the Chobani booth for like hours. What do you— Okay. Smash burgers and birria, right? Those were two massive, massive trends. What is a street food that you just like earnestly, genuinely want to see people perfect? Like what's your favorite iteration? Lahmacun?

Is it something I've eaten before? Something that I want to see? Either or, dude. Either or. Popcorn chicken. Actually? I want to see. Or those little squid balls.

What are those called? Takoyaki? Takoyaki. I want to see takoyaki here. Do you like takoyaki? I literally love Takoyaki. I want to see takoyaki here. Do you like takoyaki? I literally love takoyaki so much. It's got a unique combination of squish and chew that doesn't jive with me too well. Oh my god.

Oh my god. Like I'll dig it all year, especially when I'm drinking, but. Oh my god. I love that stuff. Man. I could eat that all. I want to see popcorn chicken and takoyaki. I love that.

I just, I want to see my favorite fish taco truck in Los Angeles left the city. RIP Ricky's Fish Tacos used to park underneath the overpass in Los Feliz. And it was a bummer for me. And I think the Baja Fish Taco, I grew up, I mean, eating them at like Rubio's, which is a chain, but also started really legit in San Diego. eating them at like Rubio's, which is a chain, but also started really legit in San Diego. I want people to just make the best fish taco possible. I want them to be on every street corner. I love fish tacos. It's the same.

It's like really, really one of my favorite foods. I love fish tacos. Yeah. And I just, and we've, the carne asada revolution's already happened in Los Angeles and soon to be coming to the world. Because like this is, you see a fashion show, right? I know we've talked about this concept, but you see a fashion show

and somebody's wearing something that looks really dumb, right? And you're like, nobody would ever wear that dumb-looking thing. Uh-huh. But then, like, five years later, something inspired by that dumb-looking thing is on the...

Is this just the Miranda Priestly Devil Wears Prada, like, soliloquy, but just condensed into... Wait, I've never seen the movie. You've ne... I've seen clips. I've seen Adrienne Grenier try and flip a grilled cheese

like 15 times. You've never seen where she says, your jacket's not blue, it's not lapis, it's cerulean. And that jacket was picked out from the very people in this room that you call stuff.

You don't know that soliloquy? Oh, you know what? I think Julia's probably told me about that soliloquy and that's why I know the thing that I'm saying. Yeah. And then I said back to her, because this is all just a conduit for conversations I've already had with her, right? That same thing happens in food, right?

Where, like, in a major city, there's a big trend. And, like, birria came to Los Angeles from Tijuana, started popping off on the old TLs for people. And now Del Taco is introducing birria. Taco Bell had birria that they tried and I think discontinued. Carne Asada, that happened in L.A. like two, three years ago. I love Carne Asada. And we've always had Carne Asada, but I'm talking about people straight up driving the meat from Mexico,

driving the wood from Mexico. I'm thinking Sonoratown. Oh, sure. I'm thinking Asadero El Chicali. What's that other one that people love? They open up brick and mortar. Anyways, point is, that already happened.

I'm waiting for the fish taco revolution. Green wine. That's just Albarino, isn't it? Maybe. What else? What else? You get one more. you get one more you get one more one more um uh it had chopped sandwiches blended sandwiches sandwich pates pates that are flavored like grilled cheeses grilled cheeses that are flavored bacon flavored pencils yeah sounds good alright Nicole

I just saw a funny picture of a kitty I love cats so much she's locked into this podcast we've heard what you and I have to say now it's time to find out what other wiggity wacky ideas are rattling out there in the universe it's time to find out what other wiggity wacky ideas are rattling out there in the universe. It's time for a segment we call Opinions Are Like Casserole.

So pretty much, if you could be on any dating show on VH1, what dating show would you be on? What was the one with Tila Tequila? I know, I know, I know. A shot at love. She's a Nazi now, despite being, I believe, Vietnamese American. But, yeah, no, I liked her vibe. Okay. I liked her vibe.

Well, I think I'd be on I Love New York. Yeah? And that was, of course, a spinoff of... Flavor of Love. Which was technically sort of a spinoff of what was it called? I don't know. It wasn't The Surreal Life, was it? Was that a cartoon?

No, no. No, you're thinking of Drawn Together, which is the cartoon, but The Surreal Life is correct. Correct, right? Because Flavor Flav and Brigitte Nielsen started dating on The Surreal Life. We watched so much VH1 together boom dude our brains

oh my god melted melted any time that we're like the kids who watch the tuk tuk they're getting stupid we were just watching

VH1 dating shows informative age Brigitte Nielsen and Flavor Flavor she was so tall he was so short he had a clock around his neck

they were and then and then on Flavor of Love New York spit or no And flavor-flavored. She was so tall. He was so short. He had a clock around his neck. He would. And then on Flavor of Love, New York spit, or no, someone- Spit on pumpkin, yeah. New York spit on pumpkin or pumpkin spit on New York? Oh, pumpkin spit on New York. Let the record show. Sorry, sorry. Anyways.

Slap me, bitch. And Kila Tequila, of course, a shot at love. That was a spinoff of her appearance on, inexplicably, Ted Nugent had a reality show. Did he really? Yeah, where he took soft millennials and he was like, you're going to come on my ranch and learn how to kill a deer. And she was one of them. And I'll never forget, he said a line that said,

Tila, what is it? Tila, sex is your currency and you're a rich bitch. And I was like oh that is the most disgusting thing Amanda's ever said and of course that Nicole

was only off the backs of the success of The Simple Life with Paris Hill and Nicole Richie love The Simple Life god

I feel like the giver I feel like I'm just I've just absorbed everything did you really watch The Simple Life what yeah of course

do you know what I'm doing right now? No, I don't. Okay. It didn't stick with me that much. Okay, it's fine. It's time for everybody's favorite segment, reviewer review. That's right. That's where we try and goad you into leaving us positive reviews on Apple podcasts because it helps us in a way that we don't quite understand, but we crave them.

Do it. So let's look at this. This is from At La Klein's. Five stars. Big. A delicate entracte to real food beliefs. Honestly, no one before Maggie has been able to present such a succinct and complete understanding of the finest in culinary culture and delectable dishes. Five stars for Maggie.

Nicole seems great. Zero stars for Josh. He is purely distraction from excellence. DNI in future episodes. Delectable dishes. Five stars for Maggie. Nicole seems great. Zero stars for Josh. He is purely distraction from excellence. DNI in future episodes. What does DNI mean? Do not include in future episodes. Josh is literally like the biggest in this podcast. Somebody has finally told me to take a vacation, and I think I'm going to listen to it.

You deserve three vacations a year. You. That would be pretty cool, dude. You deserve three vacations a year. You. That'd be pretty cool, dude. You deserve three vacations a year. And I mean that with every fiber of my being. Yeah. It's a lot. It's a lot to make, you know, you go from a show.

You work so hard. You know, talking about someone's mom dying while eating fajitas, you know. And then you got to stuff a turkey with Cheetos. And you got to come here. And you got to write mid-year reviews. You know, it's a lot. I a turkey with Cheetos. And then you got to come here. And you got to write mid-year reviews. You know, it's a lot. I like my job, though. It's fun.

I think you need to get out of here three times a year. Yeah, I should probably do that, man. You know what I mean? I'm going to New Orleans. It's fun. I give this review five stars. That's a good review, yeah. Maggie finally getting her product.

I spelled your name wrong. It's M-E-G-G-I-E. That's right. If you're a real, you're such a fake Maggie fan, you can't even name her first three albums. I don't expect them to know how to say it. Most people don't even know that Meggie isn't an actual person. Meggie is a band. Like Steely Dan.

Go ahead, Meggie. Seems to me, too. I'm just, like, so appreciative that people are finally recognizing my input into these discussions. And now that I have just, like, a microphone, I can just, like, get myself a microphone if I want to. To anyone listening who like still plays like my brother or whatever, you just lost the game. Anyways, so thank you for listening, everyone. I'll give it back to you, to you guys. Josh and Nicole. What do you rate this? What do you rate this review? A million stars. Are you serious? Maggie, did you not have a microphone for the last three and a half years? No. I didn't even know. i didn't even know you didn't know

i didn't know i didn't know that the ceiling of this podcast studio was like weird gold bank it's like an old bank i was in here for three and a half years until i looked up also for to go behind the scenes we are in the podcast studio right now because we're not doing video so we're not in the mythical kitchen right now yeah i don't know what that ceiling looks like either all i know is one time spiders rained from it into our food that's the thing that happened thousands thousand dead spiders blew into all of our food it's like a freaking plague make you play an opinion. Hi, Josh and Nicole. My name is Mia.

Long-time listener. Big fan of yours. My food opinion is that pickled okra is criminally underrated and it is not enjoyed by nearly enough people in the United States, especially, because I know it's really popular, obviously, in Texas and in Southern states,

but I feel like it hasn't really been popular in other parts of the country. You can only find it in some grocery stores kind of up north. It's so good and people think that I'm a freak because I will literally eat it by the jar full.

She's a very freaky girl, Nicole. The kind you don't take home. I love it so much and I would love to hear your opinions on pickled okra, and maybe why you think that it isn't super popular. Nicole's right that Texas isn't America, right? I talk a lot about how the idea of sovereign nation states. I think it'd be cool if Texas seceded. Don't move.

Can you name the six nations that have held Texas at any given point? Let me, can I guess? Can I guess? Okay, USA. That's one. Spain. That's Okay, USA. That's one. Spain. That's two. Mexico.

That's three. Okay, let's think, let's think. Let's think Portugal? Nope. Okay, let's think Canada. No, Canada never was like, we're going to swoop around. Guatemala.

Guatemala historically has not been a world superpower. No, you're not going to want to go to Central America. Okay. You're going to want to go back to Europe for one. For one. And I'm going to say France. That is correct. Uh-huh, uh-huh.

And then there's one more. And the last two. There's two more? A little bit tricky. One of these nations is now the United States, but for a brief period of very bellicose time, they did not consider themselves part of the United States. I knew what bellicose means. Alaska.

No, Alaska never waged war against the United States. The Confederacy did. And that is one of the nations. Oh, that's BS. Listen, and the other nation is the Republic of Texas. They declared themselves independent. They were an independent nation for like six, seven years. I know.

It's a tricky state. It's a weird history. Okay. Pickled okra. I like pickled okra. I think the reason why people don't like pickled okra or okra in general is because it's slimy in the middle. I love okra. My favorite rendition of okra was recently.

My mother-in-law had a kebab night, a kebab night, I should say. And she gave me some pickled okra. Not pickled okra. She gave me some pickled okra and not pickled. She gave me a grilled okra. And it was one of the most delicious things I've had with and I dipped it in salt and lime juice. And it was really freaking delicious. And I love okra. I don't love pickled okra, but I but I'll eat okra more. I like pickled okra because I think the the sliminess of it sort of cuts through that acid a little bit. You know what I mean? And I really like that texture. I do love, love, love okra.

Grilled okra. We had it at Safi's. That is one of my... We did? We didn't have it. No, I had it when I went with my other friends because I have other friends. You went to Safi's twice?

I sure did. We had grilled okra and it was what came sizzling off the grill. So good. Skewered so, so, so good. Okra, very, very underrated. Also, Deep's mom once made a dry curry with okra

and she really sort of like bled the slime out of it but there was still a little bit of that just kind of like sumptuous texture and with the dry curry especially

like the inside gushiness of the okra wet the dry curry from the inside out it was so good I made us I made you Persian stew with okra

it was undercooked and I'm sorry about that no but it was I learn every day. You learn every day. So Six Flags, the amusement park, it was Six Flags over Texas and it's because there were six nations that ruled Texas. Shut up.

I am so smart. What about the guy that was like, do-do-do-do-do-do. Yeah, so he was actually the nephew of the president of the Confederacy and that's why he got to do that commercial. That's a lie. That's a lie? It was actually the nephew of the president of the Confederacy, and that's why he got to do that commercial. That's a lie. That's a lie.

It was actually a female dancer in a suit. Was it really? Yeah. Do people know that commercial? Maggie would know it. You grew up here. I'm also really smart. You think you're the only smart one?

It was the hamster dance, right? It was the hamster dance? And it looks like an old band? No, no, no. That's wrong, because the hamster is... You're right. You're right. It's okay.

It's okay. We're really slogging on this one. Dude, it's the end of 2023. What do you mean? We should make this a three-hour podcast. We should do a marathon for charity, but then pocket the money. Josh, it's 2023. It's the end of the year, man.

Let's just go wild. We're vibing it. We're vibing it Let's just go live. We're vibing it. We're vibing. Thanksgiving has not happened yet. Hi, Josh and Nicole. So we are still acting if you've ever had a pizza puff.

And it's a very big thing for us because we're from Chicago or the Chicago area. And I just want to know if you'll ever eat a pizza puff. And if you don't, you better. Like you...

Okay, so a pizza puff is better than eating actual Chicago pizza? It's like a pastry in a pizza. It's a pastry in a pizza. So like, eat it and then show me. Anyway, I love you. We love you so much.

All right, thanks. We love you. We listen to you every week. And please eat a pizza puff. Eat a pizza puff. I will. Why are you yelling at me? It's so, so great.

All right, much love's so, so great. All right, much love. Oh, my God. Chicago in the building with the pizza puffs, one of the most underrated Chicago foods, and I have indeed had one. Friend of the podcast, Dennis Lee. Love Dennis. Fart Sandwich, been on the pod before.

I love Dennis Lee, and he showed me all around Chicago. Same, same. We went to maybe the worst food establishment I love Dennis Lee and he showed me all around Chicago. Same. Same. We went to maybe the worst food establishment I've ever been to and we got maybe the worst food I've ever had. We tried to get a Chicago dog but they were out of at least three ingredients to go on a Chicago dog.

Yeah, and then we got a pizza puff which, as the caller said, is, it's like a hot pocket but it's only made by one factory in Chicago and you put it in a fryer and then it stays hot for an hour to two hours and it'll still burn you. And then there's a piece of flavored goo inside of like a sort of wet soggy dough, which normally I like these things.

And then the best thing that we got at this Chicago little roadside establishment was, I don't know if they called it gravy bread, where it's an Italian beef with no beef. You simply take the roll and you slather it in juice. Okay. And you eat it. And it was, I can't stress this enough, maybe the worst food experience I've ever had in my life. I'll eat a pizza puff.

Tell me where to get a pizza. Can I get a pizza puff in California? Let me get one. Again, no. I asked Dennis why it never got outside of Chicago and he was like, oh, people don't seem to really enjoy them very much. Oh my gosh. Also, I love your accent. I love the way you speak, caller. Please just call once a week. And just for me, not to be on the podcast, just like just tell me what you did today. I love the way your accent is. It's incredible. Do I have an accent? People tell me I have a Persian accent sometimes.

No, and I know people that have Southern California, Persian American accents. I don't sound like them, do I? No, you don't. Sometimes you code switch when you're around your friends from home. I do? Yeah, yeah. You can sort of tell. It's like an inflection thing.

You have a bit of, it's almost a bit of a valley girl turned metropolitan. I see that. I see that. Do I have an accent? People say I sound like Jesse Eisenberg. I don't know what that means. Yeah. Yeah.

That's the thing that I get a lot. I don't know if it's a somewhat dry delivery. It's very pointed. I think it's just the manner in which you speak, and you kind of go up and down, and then also just very pointed. It's fast and it's pointed. It's pointed and it's the manner in which you speak, and you kind of go up and down, and then also just very pointed. It's fast and it's pointed. It's fast. Yeah, I have a lot of hardline opinions on things.

But it's not your opinion. It's the way that you deliver them with your mouth. But I think the mouth delivery is necessitated by the hardline opinions, including that hardline opinion about hardline opinions necessitating certain mouth delivery in a Jesse Eisenbergian manner. Next opinion, Maggie. I've had a lot of great food in Chicago. I love Chicago.

Me too. Me too. Hey, my name is Regan up in British Columbia, Canada. Love the show. I believe that Heinz chili sauce is far superior to ketchup. Yes. Okay. Yes.

I don't know if you guys have chili sauce down there, but if you don't, let me know. I'll send you a bottle. Thanks. Bye. Heinz Chili Sauce, along with Heinz 57 Sauce, Nicole, they are dying condiments and we need to save them. Let's bring them back. Let's bring them back. I want to try both of them. I've seen them on the shelves and I've never picked them up. The ironic

thing about Heinz Chili Sauce is it is ketchup. With spice in it? Yes. Okay. I mean, it really is. It starts with tomato puree and so it's basically

just a ketchup with spice in it but it makes everything better because 99 times out of 99, when I eat ketchup, I mix it with sriracha because I want

a spicy ketchup. But sriracha's not around that much anymore. I know. That's why I need to find an alternate and I think Heinz chili sauce might be that alternate. around that much anymore. I know. That's why I need to find an alternate. And I think Heinz chili sauce might be that alternate. Okay.

You know what I mean? That's a great opinion to end on. What's 57 sauce? So, high, I believe it. Does it have 57 ingredients in it? You've seen Heinz 57 on bottles of ketchup? Yes. I believe it has to do with the number of ingredients in the original Heinz 57 sauce.

That's awesome. Can somebody Google it? Fact checker. Fact checker. Backscratcher? Fact checker. Fact checker. Back scratcher. Fact checker. Fact checker. Heinz 57 is a synecdoche.

Ooh, what does synecdoche mean? That's one of those words that I've. Isn't it synecdity? No, synecdity is a city. No. I believe that word is pronounced. It is synecdicy? I've been saying synecdoche. Oh, I just outed myself as a dummy. It is synecdoche. I've been saying Synecdoche.

Oh, I just outed myself as a dummy. It is Synecdoche. You've never seen that movie? No. Synecdoche, New York? I thought it was pronounced. Wait, what? No.

No, but this is not the city. This is a word. No, I know that. But you, oh my God. There's a movie about it. The guy, who's the guy that played Truman Capote? Come on. The guy that played.

Philip Seymour Hoffman. Philip Seymour Hoffman was in a movie called Synecdoche, New York, which is a play on this word, synecdoche. Synecdoche or whatever. I know what I'm talking about. I looked at the Wikipedia article like 12 years ago. Wow. Am I right? I have no idea what synecdoche means.

I'm right. But isn't there a city called... Synecdoche. Yes, I'm correct. I hate this. What is Heinz 57 sauce? We didn't answer it. Manufacturing is more than 60 products at a time.

Henry thought... Okay. is more than 60 products at a time. Henry thought, okay. 57 varieties were the varieties of sauce that Henry Hines felt he sold, but he maybe, I know it's Synecdoche, New York. No, this is the movie.

I know, it's the movie. This is the city. Synecdoche is the city. Synecdoche is, and it's a postmodern psychological thriller starring Philip Seymour Hoffman, R.I.P. Yes, God. I see. You suck.

I thought the word was pronounced synecdoche. Oh, like how I thought paradigm was paradigm? A soft G on paradigm. It happens, it happens, it happens. We're both pretty dumb if you really look at it. You just said we're smart. No, I don't know, man. My life rides the sine curve of emotion constantly.

Well, and as we've now learned, synecdoche is the word of the day. We will be doing a word of the day on every podcast now. And it is a figure of speech in which a part is made to represent the whole or vice versa. As in Cleveland won by six runs. Oh, meaning Cleveland's baseball team. Because you know what Cleveland means because of the... In the context.

Yeah, the context. So it's the synecdoche. Yeah. I don't think I'm going to use that. I don't think I'm going to use that word a lot.

That's fine. Yeah. I'm just glad that you learned something and I did it. I already misused the word shibboleth. Yeah.

And this has been a shibboleth of the podcast. Thank you all so much for a fantastic 2023. We love you so much. Love you. Here's to more spreadable tinned fish and Jager bombs and porn star martinis and fish tacos.

And desert vinegar. Desert vinegar in 2024. It's all happening, y'all. This is the year we finally do it.