A Hot Dog Is a Sandwich - What Your Coffee Order Says About You ft. MorganDrinksCoffee

Episode Date: December 13, 2023

Today, Josh and Nicole are joined by Morgan Eckroth (@morgandrinkscoffee) to judge your personality and lifestyle based on your coffee order! Leave us a voicemail at (833) DOG-POD1 Check out the video version of this podcast: http://youtube.com/@mythicalkitchen To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is mythical. I'll have a large iced dirty chai, please. Oh, you're an anxious avoidant. I'm sorry? And you drive a Nissan Altima. How do you know that? This is a Hot Dog is a Sandwich. Ketchup is a smoothie.

Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what? That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich. A hot dog is a sandwich. What? Welcome to our podcast, A Hot Dog is a Sandwich. I'm your host, Josh Ayer. And I'm your host, Nicole Inayati.

And we are here with the internet's favorite barista and 2022 U.S. barista champion, Morgan Eckroth, a.k.a. Morgan Drinks Coffee. Hello, hello. I don't usually get the second half of my title sets. This is very exciting to be a barista champion here. I don't usually get the second half of my like title sets. This is very exciting to be a barista champion here. I almost did the Michael Jordan Chicago Bulls, like standing six foot six. Then Nicole,

you start doing the like, like the soft music. Standing six foot six for your US barista champion, Morgan Eckroth! If I got you in contact with the right people, do you think he would emcee competitions this year? Because this could be very fun. We could get you fully in the scene.

Please let him do this. And as a coffee aficionado who only drinks the finest of fresh ground and roasted beans, I think I would be perfect for that. I will say, last time I was here, I made you a ranch cortado, I think I would be perfect for that. I will say, last time I was here, I made you a ranch cortado, I think so. Wow.

TBT throwback. Well, the funny thing about that, from a food science perspective, is the amount of egg in ranch in the protein

actually solidifies in hot water and it cooks it like... Oh, it coagulates in a very maggot-like way. Yeah,

it looked like spaetzle, the German dumpling, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Spätzle? Yeah, yeah. Spätzle. Spätzle? What we are talking about today, Morgan, we have brought you in for a very special podcast.

This is what your coffee order says about you. That's right. So we are getting into a bit of Freudian and Jungian. That's right. We're getting into the shadow self today. We're getting into trouble today is what we're going to do. And we're going to try and figure out what our coffee orders say about us and then throw out some other hypotheticals.

But first, we need to know what your typical coffee order is. I see you drinking some brew right there. This is a very vulnerable question to ask me. I love that. I love that we're asking it. Okay. It depends. It's very contextual.

It's very seasonal. Okay. So black coffee is great. I love black coffee. I's very contextual. It's very seasonal. Okay. So black coffee is great. I love black coffee. I drink black coffee. I drink straight espresso. It's great. It's wonderful.

Sometimes I don't always want that. And so when I don't want those things, usually it's like a mocha. Like chocolate and coffee and milk. And it's like the perfect combination. It's caffeinated hot chocolate and it's delicious. Interesting. It's funny because like chocolate and coffee one mocha is like maybe the genesis of all coffee in the world which a lot of people i don't think know mocha is a port in yemen um i read friend of the show and close personal homie tom hanks gave me a book called the monk

of mocha um the drop right there. What a flex. What a flex. It's the one thing I have. Just give it to me. But no, he did. He sent me a book called The Monk of Mocha. I know the very one. Yeah, about Mokhtar Al-Khanshali. And I had a coffee once.

We were briefly talking about this. It was a $16 cup of coffee from Blue Bottle that was from these beans that this man smuggled out of the port of Mocha. And I think that was the moment when I realized like, oh, there is a level of coffee that I can enjoy. Oh, the rabbit hole has just opened and you are now tumbling down into it.

I felt spiraled. Free quality. About the Mocha that you order, like is that if you're going into a really good coffee shop that you trust or you would go to like say Starbucks and get a Mocha? That's like my default safe order like it's one of those it's like it's hard to mess that combination of things up and so it's my safe order

if i like know i need caffeine and don't really want to mess around with ordering like coffee or espresso it's also my like for here order so if i'm going to be like studying or working somewhere like that's the drink that i want sitting next to me the whole time. I miss sitting at a coffee shop and working at a coffee shop so much. I used to do that like when I was a 1099, like a freelancer. That was my jam. Just sitting down with a sauce, like a cup. And there's just a buzz and kind of a hum around you. And the baristas are over there.

It's lovely. Can I do that tomorrow? Do I need to come into work? We have like a really busy day. We have like a really busy day tomorrow. Saturday, Saturday, Saturday. There's enough space in here to kind of make shift a little.

Yeah, a little cafe setup. But the buzz and like the strangers coming in and some are saying like, nice laptop sticker. Just providing white noise in the background for your cafe experience. It's funny you mentioned like context being key in how you order coffee.

The coffee shop that I used to work from when I was a freelancer was Cafe Bene. Cafe Bene. Does anybody know that name? The name sounds familiar. I can tell you I haven't been there before, but the name conjures. Where is it? You should really check it out because it is a coffee chain from Seoul, South Korea. And it was in Koreatown.

It was two-story. Oh, that's cool. It reminded me of the library that I used to go to at UCLA too. There are a lot of Korean students in there, but I used to get an Injeolmi latte. Injeolmi is like a Korean candy that is made from this like savory bean and grain powder. That's incredible.

And so, you know, when in a Korean coffee shop, I'm going to order something like that. If you're at like the dive bar equivalent of a coffee shop, you know what I mean? I know what you mean. What's your order? Does that differ? Honestly, if I'm at like a dive bar coffee shop,

I'm getting like a mug of like diner coffee. I want like a mug of diner coffee, and I want like the side of cream and sugar, and I want to make like a potion for myself. Like that's the experience I want out of that scenario. Very much so. Same. And then if you are at a spot that you're like, this is a vaunted coffee shop.

Sure. This is high level. Is there something you go to there? I'm buying the $16 pour over. But that's it. It's like the pour over of like I'm selecting the beans that are from Costa Rica, etc. Yeah. I, you know, it's kind of tricky because I have this part of me

that like loves all the milk drinks and all the fun beverages and stuff like that. I love that. But then there's also the kind of like coffee person side of me that has this whole range of just like coffees that I like.

And so that's why I said it depends contextually. It's like if I'm at a space or a cafe where I know that this side of that kind of coffee menu isn't going to be available to me, I'm like not even going to really mess with it. I'm going to go over here to these like fun, comforting drinks that I know I'm going to like. But the minute I see this side of the menu open up to that level of coffee, I'm like, I am there like 100%. Right on. Now, what do you think that says about Morgan? Let's focus on the

mocha first. Focus on the mocha thing because that was actually really unexpected for me. I mean, the fact that you're a mocha person, it threw me for a loop. I'm very public. Yeah, I like publicly admit to this and I feel like it gets me in the hot water sometimes. You're openly a mocha person. You're out there.

I mean, I don't think it should get you in hot water. I just, I mean, all the answers together, I think just proves that you're just such a chameleon. Thank you. And you're such a malleable person. I aim to be malleable. I mean, it's just cool

how you don't have like one standard of where you go. Like you have, you've curated this life for yourself. It limits you. Like if you go into a place

and you're like, I only drink black coffee and then you get a bad cup of black coffee, you're not going to enjoy yourself when you could have had like a delicious other beverage and had a lovely time. I only drink black coffee, and then you get a bad cup of black coffee, you're not going to enjoy yourself when you could have had a delicious other beverage. Absolutely.

So curated. I think it's just so curated, and you care so much about your experiences. I do. That you're willing. It's true or false, usually. It's just incredible how you've curated this little microcosm of coffee for yourself.

Thank you. And I love it. Thank you. Your own personal coffee paradise i the reason so i would associate mocha with like 1997 second no no hear me out hear me out hear me out this is ultimately a couple god are you really really 98 yeah oh my god um but like 1997 starbucks is starting to boom you got that like second wave of coffee. Seattle is like rolling in hard right now. And they're like, we need a new drink.

Like this is literally how the pumpkin spice latte was invented. It was literally Starbucks marketing, chief marketing officer was like, we need something new. But I feel like Mocha. We need to innovate here. Like straight up. And there was like a little of just like warm spice and boom, that was it. But Mocha to me reminds me of like the Cosmo, right? The cosmopolitan, the drink. straight up and there was like a little of just like warm spice and boom that was it um but mocha to me reminds me of like the cosmo right the cosmopolitan the drink it's like this kind of

late 90s like you know oh this is fresh and now i completely agree with this comparison i think this is spot on yeah whereas now if i somebody if i saw somebody order a cosmo at a bar i would think one of two things i'd be like you just you just watched the DVD box out of Sex and the City. Or you are so on the cutting edge of bartending and alcohol culture that you Full circle. It's Smash Burgers too, same thing. Smash Burgers were what

everybody was making in 1961 and then we got away from it because they were harder to do and now we're full circle back. But like the Cosmo, I have a bartender friend who's like, knows the entire history of the Cosmopolitan and the bar was invented in New York. And I feel like that's the mocha where it's like, hey, I know so much about this, but I'm not pretentious about it.

I'm not too precious about it. But I know so much that I know how to like what I like. And I know this is what I like. And I think it's beautiful. And chocolate and coffee, like anytime you bake. Those two go together. They enhance each other. Like it's just, it's beautiful. And chocolate and coffee, like anytime you bake. Those two go together. They enhance each other. Like it's just, it's a good thing.

Yeah. I used to work at a chocolate store and we were trained as blue bottle baristas there. Oh, that's cool. That's best of both worlds. So it was really fun. So we used to make this. We had three different chocolate show. Is that how you say it?

Chocolate show. Chocolate show. Oui. Je parle juste un peu. He's on Duolingo. But we had three incredible hot chocolates. There was a Parisian, there was an Aztec, and then there was a white chocolate. And the Aztec had cinnamon and really delicious chilies.

And it was phenomenal. And then we had another mocha. It was a white chocolate with lavender and lemongrass. Oh, hell yes. Let me tell you, a shot of espresso in any one of them amazing would like change your your day your day would just turn around but in the parisian with with just vanilla bean and we would make our own hand whipped cream we would just flap it on there it was one of the most delicious experiences that i haven't had since i was like 22 is this still

open can we go back no it's closed but you've inspired me to want to have a mocha because I haven't had that chocolatey coffee experience in like maybe seven, eight years. And what am I doing with myself? Why am I doing this to myself? What do I gain from just having plain coffee? I'm just so truly a person that believes you should treat yourself.

And if you like something, you should go enjoy that thing. And so it's just, that goes with coffee, too, and sometimes that's a little pokey for, like, kind of the purest coffee drinkers, but I'm like, hey, there's all sides to this. Like, I can love, like, an anaerobic natural, like, Gesha

from Columbia, but I also want Did you know any... I'm just gonna throw words at you. The Colombian I got, the you know any I'm just going to throw I'm just going to throw words at you. are like spandex. The Colombian I got. The rest Columbia I got. I don't really get.

And I know the Colombian You just let me know how deep down this rabbit hole you want to go. Coffee got to Columbia by way of Aerobics. No, by way of a

Dutch trader who stole it from Louis XIV Is that true? and smuggled it out in a book. I know all this from the one book. That's neither here nor there.

Nicole, what is your coffee order? I want Morgan to psychoanalyze it. I'm so excited. If I go to Starbucks, I get a pumpkin cream cold brew because it's so good and I love it so much that I don't know if you guys have seen this thought exercise on TikTok where they say you have to have five liquids come out of your fingers. Have you guys seen that?

I've seen this one. Someone said gasoline and I was like, brilliant. Let me tell you, one of mine was definitely gasoline. And then the second one is pumpkin cream cold brew because I love that stuff. That's incredible. The fact that it's seasonal makes me a little bit sad, but I still absolutely love it. If I'm not in the vicinity of a Starbucks, If I'm not in the vicinity of a Starbucks, my go-to is an Americano, a hot Americano with sugar in the raw. Okay, yes. Like the baggy. Yeah, a little demerara sugar. And then a splash of cream.

I am lactose intolerant. I will still have the cream. I'm the same way. I can only drink oat milk, but if I'm having a coffee with cream in it, I don't want oat milk in my coffee. No, I don't. I want cream in my coffee. I want cream in my coffee. I respect that. And specifically, if it's Strauss milk,

if it's Strauss Creamery Cream, I'm a happy girl. Do you know Strauss Creamery or is that just a California thing? I'm not familiar with Strauss. I think that might be just a California thing. It's like the best dairy I've ever had. Happy cows come from California. Everybody knows that.

But again, if I'm not in that kind of vibe, probably just like a drip coffee with a splash of oat milk and a little bit of vanilla. I make vanilla syrup at home. Yeah. And I don't drink milk at home either. Sure. So right now, what do I have in my fridge?

It's weird how that goes around. The cream only comes into play in one very specific scenario. Yeah, when I'm outside. Sure. When I'm outside. But when I'm inside of the house, I have an espresso machine. So I use my espresso machine and then I make a vanilla bean syrup

because I bought a huge, I bought like a tumbler, like a Cambro of vanilla paste. And I'm like, I got to use this stuff somehow. So I make a vanilla. Does the vanilla paste cost as much as the vanilla beans do?

It's a little bit more. I actually don't know. I don't know. Because I know that stuff gets expensive real fast. Nielsen Massey is the brand. I have the Nielsen Massey. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's like a Stanley Cup of vanilla paste. It was like a hundred bucks. It was expensive, yeah. But I'm like, whatever. It's an investment. And it's never going to go back, ever. But I make a vanilla syrup with that. And then right now I have macadamia nut milk.

Interesting. And hemp milk. Mac milk's pretty good. So those are my alternative milks that I have in my house right now. But I don't like it whenever I get like that stuff from a coffee shop. I like it at home. Yeah. You're in control of those.

Yeah, I'm in control of those. So what does that say about me? There's a lot of things going on here, I feel. I want to start with, I feel like the Starbucks order. I feel like, so the pumpkin cream cold brew, yes? Yes, correct. I personally have had a fair amount of the Starbucks cold brew and sweet cream options.

I think they're one of Starbucks' better lines of drinks, personally. They're also, I think, from a visual standpoint, very nice. You get some flair in the actual build. It's not just a cup kind of a cup that's been like handed to you. I think you like texture a lot is what

I'm hearing throughout all these two. She's like a cat. There's like multiple very distinct textures in all these drinks. I love texture. Yes.

Big time. Big time. What do you get at Starbucks when it's not pumpkin season? Do you still get a cold brew with a sweet foam?

No. I don't try to go if it's not pumpkin season. Do you still get a cold brew with a sweet? I try to, no, I don't try to go, if it's not, okay, let's say potato season. When it's not pumpkin season, I'm not there. Gabbagino with potato milk, please.

It's coming, it is. We're this close. I think you have a certain amount of joie de vivre. That's a joie de vivre ass drink. What does that mean? Joie de vivre.

The joy of life. You take great pleasure in life. The fact that you get the pumpkin, what is it, pumpkin cold cream cold brew?

Pumpkin cream cold brew. Pumpkin cream cold brew. To me, that is a, it is fun, it is whimsical, limited time. You love life.

I do have one question. When you get an Americano, what size do you get and how many shots do you get? I normally get a large. Okay. you get um i normally get a a large okay i get a large 16 large 16 ounce americano with it's always one sugar in the raw no matter what size it is though oh i like always one sugar in the raw and then um i i ask for the cream on

the side and it's always in these little cups and i just i just throw it in do you ever take the cups like the mini cups do do they give it in. Do you ever take the cups? Like the mini cups? Do they give it, are like real ones or are they just little fake ones? They're little like fake espresso cups. Okay, okay. No, I never take them. I worked at a cafe once where we gave customers little like, there were these cute little like cream containers

that would kind of go on the side and it looked beautiful and we noticed our supply of cups was going very low very quickly and there was one time I actually saw someone like pocket in their purse, like one of them. And I was like, I can't chase you, but I really want to right now. My morals would have left me. A little barista arrested for assault. Hopefully that's never about me.

But yeah, that's what I do. I do it on the side. I don't want the barista to do it for me. I want to do it myself. I respect that. I on the side. I don't want the barista to do it for me. I want to do it myself. I respect that. I respect the control, and I also respect the particularness you have about your drinks. Yeah, no, I like it quite a bit.

I want to hold your feet to the fire here a little bit. Do you feel that there are times in your life where you struggle with control? Nicole, do you feel like there are times when you're like, hey, maybe... How many years have you known me now? Too many years to know that you definitely have issues with control. Would you like me to say yes for the sake of this episode? Well, I think that's an interesting thing about coffee. There's so many variables to it that when somebody is like,

if I don't have hemp milk, then I use this. And if I don't have mac nut milk, then I use this. And I've made my own syrup because I don't trust the syrups. I don't get hemp milk over there. It's. And if I don't have mac nut milk, then I use this. And I've made my own syrup because I don't trust the syrups. I don't get hemp milk over there. It's something that really does show you a lot about somebody, which is why I wanted to do this episode. Yes, yes. And it's an interesting thing too, from like the barista side, because you see like that, those like that kind of the personality type, like play out in cafes quite frequently. And it's interesting because from my side, serving like a billion coffees each day,

it's kind of like, oh, it's your coffee. You could have another one. It's an easily replaceable thing because I'm making these constantly, but it's like from the customer side, especially if that is your treat. This is like the start of your... This is like the foundation of how your day is

going to go. Can you use other languages to explain words? German for the rest of how your day is going to go. The raison d'etre. Yes. Can you use other languages to explain words? I like German for the rest of this. Nein, nein, nein. It's just, it's a very, it's a very interesting thing to then, because I understand the need for control. It's like, this is how the day's starting. This is how I'm expecting my drink to be.

If it's not like that, the day's kind of off in the wrong pattern. Yeah. One time I remember whenever I got a coffee from this coffee shop in downtown LA and I drank it and I didn't realize until I was like maybe two blocks that way that I picked up someone else's order. It happened. And I felt. They're fine.

It's okay. You don't even know. It's okay. The emotional anguish I felt when I'm like, this is the best vanilla latte I've ever had. And then I found out it wasn't even a vanilla latte. I don't even know what it was. You'll never be able to find it again. I'll never be able to find it again.

The soul crushing anxiety. I'm like, I just stole someone's drink. Their day is ruined. But you know what? You had the best vanilla latte you had ever had. Oh my God, it was so damn good. And then I felt bad because I stole it from someone. You talked about treating yourself with coffee.

I think the way that I drink coffee is the complete antithesis to that. Medicine? Maximum efficiency? It's like medicine, but also, okay, so there's also, I think there's a lot of weird gender stuff locked up in these beverages. And I'll tell you what, like, if you were to pull a lot of, so tea was the big drink in America, literally until the Boston Tea Party. And then there was like a concerted, forgive me if I'm wrong in any of this, there's almost a concerted PR effort. Like Thomas Jeffersonfferson came out with a statement after that that was like coffee

is the greatest american beverage of them all there was there was um i actually did uh not to not to totally derail but this is this is similar i did like a whole video on this a couple months ago when i looked into vintage coffee recipe books that was the whole thing and there was a a very very specific ad campaign that happened in the early, like, I want to say like the 1930s or 1940s around coffee. And it was a coalition between a North American coffee group and Brazil. And it was all about increasing Brazil's exports of coffee into the US. And so there were huge marketing campaigns about bringing coffee into the home and making it a fun beverage that came from this like group

that was just looking to increase coffee sales, which is super interesting. There is a PR story behind like every food boom in the U.S. But I always, since I was young, associated like drinking strong black coffee with like, this is something that strong men do and i was raised by a single dad trying to figure out what it meant to be a man in this world and i was seven eight years old and i was like black coffee is the key right uh despite the fact that like tea

is considered a very masculine thing in several other cultures you know uh and also we shouldn't be gendering our drinks but again i was a child this is yeah and like you said coffee is something that you have a lot of identity locked up in. You have preconceived notions of it. You see certain people drinking it. You don't see others. Like it's just, you kind of just take it all in and digest it. 100%.

And so since I was like seven, eight years old, I would like drink black coffee despite the fact that. Whoa. Yeah. Eight years old? You just went off the deep end like immediately, which I love. Yeah, big time. And so I have this like weird relationship with black coffee now where I almost recognize that I don't like the taste, but anything else tastes foreign to me because I've been drinking it for so long. And so when I go to a coffee shop, I get the largest iced red eye they have. Oh, red eye.

Can you tell the people at home? Tell them what that is. No, no, Morgan, Morgan, Morgan. You tell them what a Red Eye is. Morgan, you tell them. Red Eye is something where you order it and we're like, okay. All right. We're going through something.

Here's a contract. We need you to sign this before we serve it. No, Red Eye is traditionally, correct me if this is wrong, because Red Eyes are also, like this is one of these drinks that have super regional titles. Like this is, in Portland,

most often Red Eyes will be ordered as shot in the darks. Oh, that's what you'll see them as. I know red eye, I believe is also a pretty big East coast thing. Like you'll hear red eye over there a bit too. And then you'll also hear, um, black eye sometimes.

Yeah. But it is, it is a cup of coffee with espresso in it and size varies, but it's like, you're doubling down on both sides of it absolutely uh put anything in it no no no and it's ice and it's ice when it's cold brew that's even more terrifying frankly yeah yeah oh my gosh it's cold and i can drink it faster and big you go real fast after like yeah oh my gosh like 18 ounces like 18 ounces of coffee yeah it depends

i i've tried to keep it a little bit chiller since then because, you know, the old tickers I get older. We only knew that for so long. But that's my coffee shop order. And then at home, I told Morgan that I would not tell them what my coffee drink at home is. Don Francisco. Ever heard of him?

I have heard of him. Okay. This is an L. LA-based company. Yes, it is. Yeah, yeah. And he was a Mexican entertainer? Yes.

Every Saturday night I would watch it with my parents. We went over this before. I'm a big Don Francisco fan. And also Jew? Yes, correct. Supporting a local

Mexican Jew LA-based company. I love it. But the reason that I'm like slowly trying to wean myself off of this like necessary pleasure inhibition that I have where I'm like, enjoy your coffee.

So I get the butterscotch toffee scented Don Francisco. I brew it extra strong. Go ahead. No, no, no. You continue. And then I take a little bit of whole milk because I only keep whole milk in the house because I cook with it. Splash a whole milk. And then I have a like probably a two gallon

bag of Splenda that I mean to put in a little dispenser but I never fill it up and so I take the bag of Splenda and I kind of try and teeter some of it out um and then I drink about 20 and I go to bed on Friday night like just dreaming of making this drink in the morning I can't wait to have my coffee when I wake up I wake up like an hour and a half before Julia, I play, play some video games, drinking this coffee, playing a rocket league on Saturday mornings, like 6 30 AM. Yeah. This is the life I aspire to. You should honestly, no way. Yeah. And so those are my, those are my drinks. And I generally, I almost never get lattes. I just don't think I love, I don't think I love the combination of dairy and coffee. I don't think I need it.

There's certain things that I don't think need fat to carry it. But yeah, those are my drinks. First of all, I love that you, first of all, I love that that is your drink of choice. I'm glad you have that experience and it's so particular and I love that. It is one of my favorite things to hear people's like, like from me, I'm hearing you describe this drink and

I'm like, this is, this is insane. But I, I fully understand having those, like those things that just work for you and that's the tradition and that's part of it. Um, I, I'm just, you drink a red eye every day? Not every day, no. Okay, so When you go out. This is the worst part. Every day I wake up to a scoop of C4 Ultimate Explode which gives me about

250 mils of caffeine. And so from there I need to kind of chill. Yes. But if I'm on vacation especially that's when I wake up don't have the pre-workout and so I need just

You need like I need the electro Yeah, I was going to say. Yeah, but I genuinely do though love the taste of a red eye shot in the dark, whatever. Because to me, espresso, you don't get to drink enough of it.

This is true. And then American drip coffee just like tends to be a little bit weak. My Italian roommates used to call it dirty water. And so you get like the best of both worlds to me. Like that richness of the espresso

but then just the coiffability of coffee. Do you find, so you're I'm just, I'm curious about this because you're drinking so much black coffee, be it espresso and coffee together. Do you find yourself having, do you just enjoy it as like a flat thing of like I just, I like this drink. Wherever I go

this drink is kind of the same to me. Or do you start to really pick out differences from different shops you go to or like different combinations of like espresso and coffee together? So one thing, I actually really don't like cold brew. And maybe this is an unfair characterization, but to me, cold brew,

the ones that I've had are like a little bit more acidic. Totally fair. In a way. And so- I like cold brew for the most part, but it's real easy to go real wrong. Yeah, like it mixed with something else. Yeah. And then sometimes I feel like it's a little bit like lighter of a roast. I don't know.

I want just like a nice dark roast hot coffee chilled down in a fridge overnight and then just a shot of espresso right in there. Plenty of ice kind of dilute it like a good cocktail, you know. And so I'm sure there are differences, but I'm drinking it too fast. I often feel like me caring about...

You really are going for efficiency here. Efficiency with just enough enjoyment to keep me on that efficient path, yeah. Okay. I love that. Okay. How many more minutes do we have for this podcast? Five. Okay, Josh, this is an intervention.

Sorry to be so frank. I have written you a page about how much I care about you. But I think I'm just going to can it. Why do you like caffeine so much? It's like assaulting how much you love caffeine. I'll tell you why. No, and I don't know if you as a fellow ADHDer can like, I mean, you've chosen a career in the caffeine business.

It makes my brain finally catch up to my racing inner monologue. I see. I can relate to this. I will say I do my best to curb my caffeine. Well, good for you. I fully understand that you you kind of you need something to to get the horses off to the races sure which i i fully understand i also just this is this is total total side tangent i'm gonna send you a grinder i'm gonna get you a grinder

so you can have all those delicious whole bean coffees and you can grind them yourself it's gonna be very exciting. I would like that, because we've gotten a lot of coffee gifts from people, and I just have them stockpiled. You're just there. You deserve a good grinder. Shout out to Dan Sugarman. I haven't drank your coffee yet, because I don't own a grinder. But he will very soon.

Very soon. Now, is the Don Francisco, I'm sorry, did you say Toffee Crunch? Butterscotch Toffee. Let's go back to that. Oh, please, please, please. Yeah, yeah. So if I were to open the canister, I'm sorry, did you say toffee crunch? Butterscotch toffee. Let's go back to that. Oh, please, please, please. Yeah, yeah. So if I were to open the canister, it would just be like butterscotch toffee like punching me in the face. Yeah, but only when you really huff it.

Okay. You got to get your nose in there and like really. And I think the fumes kind of get in the blood vessels. Oh, yeah. No, for sure. So you're saying it tastes quote unquote fake. What is fake really? No, no, you know what I'm saying. It's all aroma though. So you're saying it tastes quote unquote fake. What is fake really?

No, no, you know what I'm saying. It's all aroma though. It's like you don't get it in the coffee really. I've done like some, I've tasted some like dastardly, like flavored coffees, but that's the only way that they can be described. And it's weird because you will open up a bag of it and it will just assault your senses. But then you grind it and you brew the coffee

and it's just kind of like, it's just kind of coffee. Like there's not, there's that, the oils that they're putting these in doesn't really translate to the cup in a super meaningful way. Do you feel that way too about your butterscotch toffee situation or do you feel like it just inundates your, every pore in your being? Well, I'll tell you what.

So while I'm, while I'm doing my- Soaks into the skin. While I'm doing my Rocket League warmups while the coffee's brewing. Naturally. The aroma, that's a big part of coffee. Sure. So I'm smelling my Rocket League warm-ups while the coffee's brewing, the aroma, that's a big part of coffee. Sure. Major part. The best part of waking up, right?

It smells like a candy store, you know? And there's the butterscotch toffee. It's emanating, you know? I'm doing my little drills trying to make sure my skids are right. Butterscotch coffee. It is emanating. Oh, my gosh. And so, yeah, it also smells a part of taste,

especially when you add just a sickening amount of Splenda in there. Yeah. Sometimes the Splenda doesn't blend in. It floats on top. Oh, unique. A little texture, a little bite, a little crunch. That's a unique thing that I think only you experience. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I don't know what this says about you other than— Sometimes protein powder goes in there, too. That's fine. I'm a big fan of— I understand that. I kind of assumed that was there already. Is that what the kids call it? Proffee?

Proffee? Is that what they call it? Protein coffee? Proffee? Is that what they call it? Protein coffee? Protein coffee? Proffee? I call it pro juice. It's like go juice, but pro juice. Pro juice.

I don't know what that says, what this whole coffee thing says about you, except you're Josh Sharer, baby. That's all you are. Were you surprised by it? Would you have expected a different answer from it? No, this was exactly what I expected, I think. Same, same.

A little rapid fire for other people out there. What are the most common copy orders that you see where you think baristas are judging people? I think there's a lot of perceived judginess. It's kind of like every customer is like, my order is so complicated. I'm like, it's just like is so complicated. It's fine. Order whatever you want.

I think the ones that people think they're getting judged for the most is when they start adding things. I feel like if they feel like they add more than two things, it's complicated. People will be like, I'll have a vanilla latte with oat milk.

An extra shot. I'm sorry. It's like that. It's fine. No one actually cares. The people that are getting bent out of shape, that's a them problem. That's a personality issue. Yeah, that's a you problem. Anxious avoidant.

Yes. Which I don't know what that means. I'm trying to think about things that I have judged customers for, even in earlier barista times. And I think I've never necessarily judged someone as much as I've felt concerned for people. And there's people who get six to eight shots first thing in the morning. And you kind of see them at lunchtime.

They're doing the order again. It's the same order. And it's like those ones I'm like, hey, I think we need to talk here and just make sure we're on the same page. But very, very few judgy drinks that I think I feel about people. For the record, I keep my caffeine consumption under 500 milligrams a day. FDA says 400 milligrams is toxic. I was going to say a little disclaimer.

Good, okay. I'm larger than most people, and so I deserve to up it. And also I need it. Daddy needs it. You deserve what you deserve, Josh. How do you feel about espresso tonics? Oh, I love them. I love them.

I think they're delicious. I am. Yes, Josh, you have your eyebrows are throwing. I am here for a carbonated coffee. I will tell you that much. I love espresso tonics. I also, they're very versatile. Like, I mean, just the format.

Like you can take the ton the format, like you can take the tonic syrup out and you can put like whatever other syrup you want in there. It's delicious. I love me the fizzy coffee and I actually

You also like a fizzy coffee. Well, I love specifically drinking straight espresso, which I do love and if I'm going to a nice coffee shop, I'll actually try something

that they're like proud of, you know? Sure, same. Yeah, like I like to, you know, if you go to the old spaghetti factory, you get the spaghetti if you have a nice, same. Yeah, yeah. Like I like to, you know, if you go to Yale Spaghetti Factory,

you get the spaghetti. You get the yogurt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But places that give you the mineral water along with the espresso. Oh, sidecar, right? Oh, a little sidecar

of sparkling water. It's lovely. I love the sidecar too. And you get a spoon too and then you like stir it and you sip and it's lovely. Like that's such a fun experience. But I went to a coffee shop recently

and they had an espresso tonic and I was like, this seems perfect for me. And I got it and it just it tasted like I don't know like cabbage had fermented it had such a farty and I couldn't farty? I will say this

espresso tonics usually live for the most part at like specialty coffee shops you don't see them too much in like the Starbucks like second wave realm they are so highly dependent on what coffee gets put in. I have had some espresso tonics that in theory should have been delicious, but simply because it was like a blend or like a kind of a funkier coffee, it went off the rails so quickly.

So I understand what happened to you and I have had that experience as well. I sympathize very hard with this. If you had just like one piece of advice to the listeners of like how to enjoy your coffee better, how to make the most out of your coffee experience, what would it be? Get good coffee. That is the beginning. I think often people are like, is there like a drink or like a whatever. It's like the foundation of all coffee drinks is coffee.

Get good coffee. You're right. And most things will taste pretty good. That's insightful. Sometimes I just, I take Nescafe Instant and I do this. We're going to have to go taco. We're there, I think, after this. Am I interrupting?

No, no. What I did is I would stir just enough water in it to create a paste. You would eat the, how old were you?... Imagine you with like a wooden stir stick, just kind of like shoveling. How old were you? Is this like yesterday? This is past December. I'm going to get you a grinder.

We're going to have a whole... I'm going to change your life, Josh. I need help. Thank you so much. All right, Nicole and Morgan. We've heard what you and I have to say. Now it's time to find out what other wacky ideas are rattling out there in the universe. It's time for a segment we call... Opinions are like casseroles! All right, Maggie, fire up that first opinion.

Go ahead and leave this message for Nicole. This is Elizabeth from the Midwest, because I'm not sure Josh would answer honestly. I'm an honest woman. He's always on the pod talking about the massive amounts of protein he eats at a single sitting. What can he balance with that? He's got to just have a rock in his gut that won't process. So is he pounding prunes and like salad with that? Or does he just better living through chemistry that problem? Thanks for the podcast. Hello. Thank you so much for directing this question to me, not Josh.

I don't know if you heard the podcast that we just did, but it's all the coffee he drinks. It's just running right through him. So it's literally like 200 grams of protein. Is that accurate? That's what I shoot for, yeah. 200 grams of protein and 500 milligrams of caffeine. And no water.

Maybe a guava LaCroix. Maybe a guava LaCroix. No, I drink like six or seven of those a day. And then green jarred salsa and that's the only thing this man consumes but you know what I think

he's doing alright Morgan do you have any guesses about your your solution yeah yeah I mean I think I'm on the caffeine train I mean as

the the whole the coffee thing makes it go very fast oh sure does like a luge I'll leave it. It is up to you.

I actually am a huge fan of prunes for that exact reason. I eat a ton of dried fruit. I haven't seen you eat a prune in like two months. Can I tell you what I do? You know, some people do like intermittent fasting when it comes to like calories or whatever. I do intermittent fasting on nutrition. No, this is because whenever I go home,

my dinner tonight is literally going to be like a half a head of roasted cauliflower. I made a bunch of like pickled carrots. I'm going to like turn that into some sort of a salsa. The other day I made a cauliflower gratin, except the gratin part was literally just roasted tomatoes, zucchini and miso blended up. When I go home, I am just eating all delicious fresh produce

and dried fruits and fibrous vegetables. And then when I come here, I just eat like fistfuls of ham because I don't want to pay 30 bucks for lunch delivery. And then all the stuff that we eat on set is just like, you know, calzone based. It's a well-balanced diet. All the major food groups right there.

You don't have to balance it all in every meal. You can take a... You look at it holistically? Exactly. Okay. But thank you for the concern about my digestive issues. And Morgan, thank you for being here for that question. Of course.

Hi, my name is Brian. Thank you, Nicole and Josh, for inspiring me to go to culinary school and, you know, work fine dining right now. I just would like to know, what do you think about things like edible flowers, smoke on cocktails, you know, anything that just adds glitz and glam to a dish that might otherwise taste better without it. Thank you so much. Love you guys. Love the pod.

You can take this one, Morgan. How do you feel about this? I'm, I'm, I'm actually so glad to be here for this. I, I am,

I'm a big fan of throwing some jazz hands on like a dish, like occasionally. And also like I was going to say in barista competitions which are like a weird silly strange thing that I do and are a whole world of their own all of our beverages have to have so much flair in them and so it's always it's always the flowers

and the smoke and the dry ice and everything and it's it's so fun to make a thing that looks as interesting as it tastes I'm pro flair but I do recognize it has a place. I think there are definitely dishes and times where it is not appropriate to add those things, but to each their own.

Somebody, so there were, I'm trying to remember, there were two cookbooks that came out around the same time. One was a chef named Brooks Headley, who was the pastry chef at some spot in New York, but he opened Superiority Burger. And he was known as this just like punk rock chef, just like super like masculine rocker dude, despite being a pastry chef.

And in his cookbook, he had like black and white photos, like a cigarette ashed out next to a cake. And then there was another more sort of like bloggy type person with the cookbook. And someone wrote these dual reviews where they were like, well, hers seems so curated and precious, whereas his is like super DIY in the moment candid. And it was like, no, hers seems so curated and precious, whereas his is like super DIY, in-the-moment, candid. And it was like, no, somebody ashed that cigarette intentionally on a photo set.

Both of these have the same amount of curation. So when we're talking about the things like edible flowers and glitz and glam, that comes in waves and cycles. And so now fine dining, like the trends are a really interesting one is, you ever see where they shave radishes, they mandoline them out super thin, and then they scale them all across the bowl to almost obscure what's underneath? Oh, yeah. Yes, of course. That's the same type of glitz and glam,

although we see that and we think it looks cool and mysterious, but that's what people thought about edible flowers 20 years ago. Right? So there's always going to be these aesthetic changes in fine dining, and some of them, I don't think the dish needed that many radishes. One of my biggest pet peeves is you go to a fine dining restaurant and you'll them, I don't think the dish needed that many radishes. One of my biggest pet peeves is you go to a fine dining restaurant

and you'll get like a cake dessert and the cake is just, it's torn and it's torn and thrown on the plate. Yeah. It's like- But like very aesthetically. Exactly. And it's meant to look rustic.

Like somebody described it as a cake fell from the sky and happened to land on the plate. But it's like, this would have tasted so much better if it was just a nice piece of cake. I think the question that needs to always be asked is is it functional sure does it is intentional yeah is it intentional is it functional in the dish or the drink or whatever you're garnishing yeah 100 and again it's it's times change uh 10 years from now

the aesthetic will be completely different and we'll be complaining about the old days of the radish shells covering things or nasturtium leaves or red sorrel. Let me tell you, I normally love some good glitz and glamour with my food. But the other day I saw a video on the internet of Poppy Steak. Have you heard of this place? No. It's in Miami. They bring you a briefcase

of meat and they open it and there's bottle service girls going steak and then they take a bread they take a hot iron they flame it up they go while they're like playing like music they brand the steak you they leave the table charge you a thousand dollars oh my god yeah do i think that there's a place for edible flowers and smoke coming out of a cocktail? Sure. Do I think the opposite ends of the spectrum is being ostentatious and crazy?

Yeah. Can I respect the gold leaf on a dessert? Sure. Do I love the craziness of going to a restaurant and dropping a grand on a piece of meat? Not really. So I think there to a restaurant and dropping a grand on a piece of meat. Not really. So I think there's a time and place for everything. I think being a culinary school kid, you'll definitely be introduced to a lot of really cool, interesting ingredients and garnishes that you've never heard of or tasted before.

But just keep that in mind that garnishing is a spectrum and you can very simply be an edible gold person or it can be a poppy steak branding table side girl restaurant so i i had i had a great garnish recently shout out to chef diego argoti at poltergeist he has a dish called poltergeist did you have the thai caesar yes do you remember the garnish i can i say it say it okay they basically took these rice papers like you know the ones that you use for summer rolls

sayo sayo and then he he fries them and then he arranges them like a glacier up a nice like a glacial

mountain tall and then he puts some powdered lemongrass on the top it's like lemongrass I don't think it's spirulina but it's this kind of green yeah sure and there's a wonderfully dressed Caesar salad I say dressed put some powdered lemongrass on the top. It's like lemongrass. I don't think it's spirulina, but it's this kind of green. Sure.

There's a wonderfully dressed Caesar salad. I say dressed because... I'm like imagining like a babbling brook being incorporated in this somehow as well. Yeah, it's like that. It's landscaping. It's phenomenal. So you have to take your spoon and you crack it almost like it's encased in like salt.

And then they become the croutons of the salad. Oh, I love that. Awesome. It's functional. It's functional. There like salt. And then they become the croutons of the salad. Oh, I love that. It's functional. It's functional. There you go. You should go to dinner there. It's not precious.

It's not like they're artfully plated. It's just a mouth. No, there's a reason it's there. It looks, it functions aesthetically, and it functions in taste as well. God, that rules. That's a great salad. New techniques. Be open to new techniques.

Yeah. Have fun. Culinary school's fun. Hey, Josh. Hey, Nicole. This is John from Jacksonville, Florida. What about Morgan? First of all, I just want to say that the Jaguars are going to win a Super Bowl before the Eagles do.

Doug Peterson, round two, baby. In my food opinion, I want to get your take on peanut butter and chicken noodle soup, because it's something my girlfriend has done since we've been together. And to be frank, it just grosses me out. So I need to hear somebody else say it. Thanks, guys. Morgan? You're getting in the middle of some relationship drama right now, actually.

Most of the time I was telling him to get a divorce. Yeah, Josh. I say, no, work on it. Come on. If you're having enough problems to go to a food podcast, you should get a divorce. I don't know. If that's where your relationship ends up.

Yeah, yeah. All family, friends, actual therapists run their course and go about us. Oh my God. Time to call it quits. You ever put peanut butter

in chicken soup? I gotta say, I might be the wrong person to ask on this. I grew up vegetarian and like don't really eat meat. So I do like a lot of fish, but I will say conceptually,

peanut butter and in like a chicken soup, I could see that working nicely. That sounds, there's like a, I could, I feel like it would be nice. We're on the right side of history here. Yeah.

Yeah. You could theoretically do anything. My question is, what are the, what's the like what's the theme of the soup? What are the other... See, if it's just peanut butter and chicken, we've got a problem. But there are certain spices I can see being very nice in here. Certain profiles that'd be delicious.

I put a spoonful of peanut butter in my ramen sometimes with a squirt of sriracha and a little bit of lime. It's delicious. Call it a pad thai. I'm feeling a little bit lonely. But the chicken noodle soup part bothers me a little bit just because of the noodle. The noodles, they just dissolve at that point.

Especially if it's a can. I know, but they bother me. But they bother me. It can happen, sure. I don't condone it. I'm not going to condone this bad behavior. But you can do it. The combination of bouillon and peanut butter,

you already know where I'm going to go with this. It reminds me of... Dog food? No, no! One of my favorite West African dishes, mafe. Sorry, I also love mafe. I love mafe. I love mafe.

Mafe is a... It can be made with chicken or lamb or goat, whatever meat. Senegalese, right? Yeah, Senegal. I believe also in Nigeria, in meat. Senegalese, right? Yeah, it's Senegal. I believe also in Nigeria, in Cote d'Ivoire, they make it. But my aunt is Senegalese and I grew up eating it. She just called it peanut sauce for us. And she made it with beef.

But it's, you know, there aren't like... It's like bouillon and peanut flavors. Effectively, yeah. And it becomes super, super creamy. The oil kind of breaks. You use red palm oil. There's tomato paste in it. There's a Maggie sauce, which is really good.

It's incredible. And then she makes this habanero hot sauce for it. So you get the creaminess and richness and the peanut butter and the beef fat. It's so savory. So good. So you're like 30% of the weight of that. And I think that's cool.

You got to start somewhere. You got to start somewhere. You got to start somewhere. Keep on keeping on. All right. That's our time. Thank you all for listening to a hot dog is a standard. We've got new audio only episodes every Wednesday videos out here on Sundays.

Morgan, thank you so much for stopping by. This is a blast. Thank you for having me. It's been great. Of course. Where can people find you? Plug what you got to plug.

Oh, you can find me at Morgan drinks coffee on pretty much everywhere. YouTube, Tik TOK, Instagram. Um, yeah, a lot of coffee things.

So come hang out. Oh yeah. Coming out. That's awesome. If you want to be featured on opinionsinions or iCastroles, you can hit us up at 833-DOGPOD1. The number again is 833-DOGPOD1. Have you ever called our hotline?

I have not ever. I kind of want to now, honestly. You should call it. And for Mythical Kitchen, check us out on YouTube. We got videos of doing other stuff. You know the deal. See y'all next time.