A Hot Dog Is a Sandwich - What's the Best Sparkling Water?

Episode Date: April 17, 2024

Today, Josh and Nicole dive into the world of sparkling waters and name the best seltzers to drink and stay hydrated. Leave us a voicemail at (833) DOG-POD1 Check out the video version of this podcast: http://youtube.com/@mythicalkitchen To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. If you like bubbly, you're basic. If you like Topo Chico, you're a hipster. And if you like spin drift, you've ascended to a higher astral plane where a juicy stratosphere protects you from the waves of the world. You are impervious to any demons that shall be cast upon thee. This is a hot dog is a sandwich. Ketchup is a smoothie.

Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what? That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich. A hot dog is a sandwich. Ketchup is a smoothie. Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what? That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich. A hot dog is a sandwich. What? Welcome to A Hot Dog is a Sandwich, the show where we break down the world's biggest food debates. I'm your host, Josh Ayer. And I'm your host, Nicole Aniety.

And sorry I got weird with the demon stuff. I was listening to a podcast this morning about a Pentecostal preacher. Really? He was casting devils out of everybody. So you like to listen to podcasts? Does that surprise you? I hate podcasts. I don't listen to any podcasts.

Did you know that about me? I recently went to a restaurant and they had a nice big beer list and I asked the server, what's your favorite beer? What should I drink? He just goes, I don't drink beer. And I was like, well, lie to me. Nicole, you're hosting a podcast with me. Lie to me. Tell me that you like podcasts. Can I tell you why I don't listen to podcasts too much?

Yeah, convince our listeners that they should stop. No, no, no. Let's do it. Let me tell you, if I were to listen to a podcast, I feel like I would meld my vision into that of the podcast I'm listening to. And I just want to be myself on this podcast. That's a fair point because this was an Ira Glass podcast. It was a throwback to This

American Life. Yeah, yeah. And do you remember the first podcast that we recorded where I was doing an Ira Glass impersonation and I was so ashamed about it that we re-recorded the entire first episode? It's okay. You have to learn. You gotta learn. You gotta learn. But yeah, that's why I don't listen. I mean, like, I listen to, like, the Dead Meat podcast. Like, I don't listen to the podcast. I, like, you know, the Dead Meat channel?

Yeah. I, like, listen to it while I'm, like, driving or, like, to the podcast. You know the Dead Meat channel? Yeah. I listen to it while I'm driving or doing my makeup, so I'm not watching it. You're just watching YouTube videos while you drive? No, no, no. I don't watch them. I listen to them, specifically Dead Meat because it's the best. Today we're talking about what is the best sparkling water, as you can physically hear my cup of sparkling water over here bubbling in the microphone.

Do you hear that? I hear mine. Mine is echoing in my ear. But sparkling water, Nicole, it is a category that has been around for, well, hundreds of years. I love sparkling water. I am a huge fan, but it has recently exploded. I remember, God, probably about 10 years ago when LaCroix hit Costco. Really?

That was the sparkle apocalypse. You know, it was like office culture for me. Like, I used to work in like random offices here and there. But here, the LaCroix boom was like a next level thing. Like, people were drinking LaCroix, crushing. You specifically. All you would do would, you would drink like eight sparkling waters a day. Oh, I still do.

It was alarming. No, but because I love it But when I grew up I remember like Hating sparkling water And then I think it was LaCroix having like a cool package That actually got me to start drinking it And also I drank so many Freaking diet low calorie low sugar beverages For so long and now it's like oh my god

The pure taste of water with bubbles in it Holy smokes But it's not a pure taste of water with bubbles in it, holy smokes. But it's not a pure taste of water. There's like, even like the plain or clear ones, they have like this weird metallic-y taste, almost like there's like... That's the minerals, baby. Is it the minerals? Ooh, that's the unique proprietary mineral blend.

So what's the difference between like mineral water and sparkling water? Is there even a difference between the two? No, like all sparkling water does have minerals in it. People will argue that there are differences between soda water, seltzer water, etc. And I believe it ultimately comes down to seltzer water being artificially carbonated. Okay.

Whatever that quite means. But I use a soda stream at home. Do you really? Yes! Dude, I drink like two liters of sparkling water a day out of the soda stream. That's crazy. Why did you frown at me? I just told, I drink like two liters of sparkling water a day out of the SodaStream. That's crazy. Why did you frown at me like I just told you I've been doing black tar heroin?

I don't know. I guess it was just It's good for you, maybe. I feel like it's not all those bubbles. It like doesn't, is that why you burp? Yes. No, that, Nicole, that actually is why I'm burping constantly. Have you ever thought about, hear me out, just drinking still water? I don't enjoy still water. But life

isn't all about enjoying it. You can't be a hedonist 24-7. Oh yeah, real hedonistic. I'm drinking zero calorie sparkling water. Oh my god. I'm like the Marquis de Sade over here for my freaking limoncello LaCroix. No, but to me it brings a lot of joy to my life and I think a lot

of people, they have their brands that they drink and they don't exactly think about why. So we need to like break down some components of how we're judging our sparkling water. Should we start with like

the least, the least flavorful to the most flavorful? Well, what does flavorful mean to you? And, and, and, are we, so, the LaCroix that I've poured

into my don't talk to me until I have my hot dog water mug, this is the mint mojito flavored LaCroix that I have poured into my don't talk to me until I have my hot dog water mug, this is the mint mojito flavored LaCroix. Which tastes like you went out drinking and then you threw up and then you put some chewing gum in your mouth and it's that breath. It's mojito vomit breath gum breath. That's what it tastes like.

Am I wrong? To me, it's more like if you spilled some Vicks VapoRub. If you rubbed Vicks VapoRub on the stylus of the SodaStream and then just dunked it in there, there's a little stylus that pumps out the gas. You just rub that with Vicks VapoRub

because you thought it would lube it up a little bit. It's not great. But are we putting flavored seltzers or flavored sparkling water in the category of the other sparkling waters? I think we should. I think we should because as much as I love like plain sparkling water, I feel like the incredible amount of cool flavors is just getting more and more.

I agree with that. But where do we draw the line on that? Because I have an answer. When does it become juice? Is that what you're asking? When does it become a soda pop? A soda. I think sugar or fake sugar.

Cuanto. Cuanto sugar. How much sugar? Not too much. But like, okay, so. Just a little. There's one brand that I'm thinking about that we need to decide if it should even be represented. It's Spindrift, baby.

Okay, let me tell you. The other day I had a Spindrift. What's it called? Not a Truly, but it's basically a True. What's it called? The Seltzers? Did you just drink down a Spindrift and add vodka to it? No, no, no.

It was like a prepackaged. What are they called? I'm so sorry. This is a Sparkling Water podcast. You have to give me some grace, Nicole. You have to. I don't have to give you anything other than a breath mint. Also, it smells like ham and mustard.

Nicole, the breath mint is built into the mint LaCroix. I literally despise you right now. I'm so sorry. I had a lot of Zatarain's Creole mustard during breakfast. It's such a good mustard. What is that? What is it called whenever it's like, it's a sparkling water plus a green alcohol? Oh, I mean, yeah, they call it a seltzer.

Are they called hard seltzer? Hard seltzer, yeah, yeah. I had a Spindrift hard seltzer. Wait, like Spindrift proper brand? Yes, yes, yes. They're making hard now? Yes, yeah, they call it a seltzer. Are they called hard seltzer? Hard seltzer, yeah, yeah. I had a Spindrift hard seltzer. Wait, like Spindrift proper brand? Yes, yes, yes. They're making hard now? Yes, yes, yes. Dude, everyone's getting hard.

And can I tell you, that was my favorite hard seltzer I've had. But whenever it comes to just drinking a Spindrift like in the office, too much acid, too much juice. And I can't, it's not neutral enough. The one thing I love about sparkling water is that it's neutral plus bubbles plus a little bit of flavor. There's almost too much flavor in Spindrift that it turns me off and I'm like, this is marring my experience. Oh man, Spindrift me. So for people that don't know what Spindrift did, if we can sort of back all this up, I think a lot of the sparkling water trend is people's fear of diet soda. I think the anti-aspartame trend really got people to sort of kick Diet Coke as a habit and turn that right to sparkling water. It's a fun beverage. It's in a

can that you can just crack open. And it's got like just enough flavor essence, but no artificial sweeteners. And also there's tends to be no citric acid. So if you get a lemon LaCroix, a lemon LaCroix, right? It's not lemon juice in your LaCroix. It is lemon essence, which is the steeped rind. Is lemon LaCroix not sour? No. Oh. We just talked about perceived acidity. Shout out Arielle Johnson, friend of the show.

She was talking about perceived acidity where you smell lemon zest and you assume acid. That's why when you add lemon juice to, say, a stew early on in the cooking process, it tastes less sour later. It's not because the acid denatured, it's because you're not smelling lemon, because the aroma is cooked out. The aromas evaporate. And so, lemon LaCroix is not sour, it is merely essence. That's so nuts. I know, right?

But what Spindrift did was they were like, okay, we can put a nominal amount of lemon juice in this and make it taste sour, and there's a little bit of sugar in lemon juice as well. And so each spindrift has like six, seven calories, which is completely negligible. But I love just sparkling water and lemon juice. Nicole, when I soda stream. I disagree with you.

I disagree. Oh, but what about the raspberry? They have a raspberry lemon. I don't know what it is. Let me tell you. Again, I love their hard seltzers. I think they do a great job. But something about the acidity, it just turns me off to the point where I think it's because the bubbles also kind of, they create this sensation in your mouth where you're like, hmm, acid.

Or hmm, bubbling, which equates to acid. So it's almost too much acid for me. I also feel the same about Waterloo. Now, I don't know if Waterloo necessarily has any sort of like juice content in it, but it's really flavored. Yeah. It's like triple LaCroix flavored. And again, it mars my experience. And typically, I'm not, like right now I'm drinking a Guava LaCroix, but like typically I'm not doing that on its own.

It's accompanied by a meal, typically. Wait, that's your like, LaCroix is your mealtime little treat? Not LaCroix, no. What do you mean? You said your sparkling water is normally accompanied by a meal, but that's your like, LaCroix is your mealtime little treat? Not LaCroix, no. What do you mean? You said your sparkling water is normally accompanied by a meal, but that's your... My sparkling water is, yeah, I don't drink sparkling water. You don't drink it in a vacuum. You don't raw dog?

Oh, man, you got to raw dog the sparkies. Unless I have a coffee on the side and I need to change my palate. That's literally what I did this morning. Wait, you and I are so much more alike than different. You just found out I've known you for five years? Because my mealtime treat is I don't think diet soda is bad for you. We did the whole podcast. I now, let me tell you, I now enjoy and like diet soda because I gave it a chance.

I love that. I don't have it all the time. Maybe once every two weeks. Well, I used to drink like six cans a day. And even if aspartame and diet soda isn't like expressly bad for you and we talked about this with Dr. Mark, check out that podcast,

it was great, it can't be good for you. Sure. And like, plain sparkling water has to be better in some regard and so I just decided

to stop drinking as much diet soda but when I sit down to a meal, ooh, and I got a nice big burrito in front of me and I just want

a cold diet Coke to go along with it. Yeah, I mean, nothing better than Gorma Sabziana Sprite. Like, it's not, I'm not crazy but I Coke to go along with it. Yeah, I mean, nothing better than Gourmet Sapsiana Sprite. Like, it's not crazy. But I don't know what it is. I think it's LaCroix is the best.

LaCroix slash Pellegrino slash Perrier are the best. Sorry, go ahead. I'm so sorry. They are like, you're saying why am I lumping them together? Yeah. I think it's because LaCroix has such a little taste of whatever it is. Like this is guava, sure. But it's a hint of guava.

It's not like a guava sparkling water. It's just guava sparkling water, you know? Guava sparkling water. San Pellegrino, LaCroix, and Perrier have nothing in common. Oh my god. They have nothing in common, Nicole. Again, listen. I'm a creature of convenience.

I'm talking about the places where I eat normally is at work at home at home or at my in-laws like you know what I mean. I'm a creature of habit. It's not like I actually I'm actively searching out like spin drifts or actively searching. It's what's in front of me and I just take it and I'm okay with it. Okay but if you had okay um yesterday I was running late going to work and and there's this little gym vending machine, and I was like, I just need water on my way to work, and I got a Pellegrino, because I will drink sparkling water at the gym, after the gym. I used to drink it- That's kind of crazy.

I know. When you get thirsty, your body doesn't crave just still water. Almost never. My body, I don't know how to explain this. My body is so post-biological craving that everything I do is for fun. Your body can't be post-biological craving. I am post-biological craving. I have beaten it.

That sounds really cool and all. That makes you really cool. But I don't think that's rooted in any sort of logic or science. I don't know, man. Like, if you're ever like, you know what? People are like, oh, if you crave chocolate, like, your body needs magnesium. Yeah, yeah. It's like you're eating dirt.

Like, your body needs some sort of nutrient, but you don't subscribe to that. You're post that stuff. Yeah, and I think a lot of people are. Hear me out. Hear me out. You know those tech bros that are like, I don't need to eat from enjoyment. All I drink is Soylent and whatever, and I am beyond the need for taste. I'm the flip side opposite of that.

Where I'm like everything I put in my mouth is purely for fun and recreation and I'm trying to get as much protein as possible within that and enough fiber not to die of colorectal cancer. And so those are my goals. Those are the community goals. So the point is like no I don't have the biological urge

to drink still water. You do, but you've numbed yourself to it. Correct. Got it, got it, got it. I'm sure the urge exists deep down somewhere. But then I see, like, ooh, a blood orange, you know, what is the orange? Orange. Orange.

Oh, my God. That's a soda. That's a soda. That's a soda. But it's the best soda. Yeah. Ever. And so, you know, I just I think there are better alternatives for water.

Point is, I got to San Pellegrino and with all due respect, yeah, plain. And I like plain sparkling water a lot. Was it in a was it in a bottle? The plastic bottle, yeah. The plastic thin bottles and they're kind of elegant. I love the San Pellegrino branding. It taste for taste, with all due respect to the San Pellegrino folks,

it's by far the worst sparkling water for my own personal taste. For my own personal taste. Oh, I love San Pellegrino. From my own personal taste. It's too soft. The bubbles are borderline non-existent. That's okay. That's okay. Actually, a very stark difference

in a lot of sparkling waters is effectively the size of the bubbles, right? The sharpness or the dullness of them. Yeah, there's different amounts. I remember when I was in Germany, there was Wasser, still Wasser, and then Medi-Wasser, which is like medium bubble sparkling water. If you're in Germany and someone asks if you want to see their Midi-Wasser, you don't say yes.

But I think you have to emphasize still Wasser when you go to Germany or else they'll just assume it's sparkling water. I love that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's my big adult indul Yeah. That's my big adult indulgence. That's my lifestyle creep, right? I'm never going to change cars, but I will drink sparkling water at every restaurant. When you go to a restaurant, oh, you say still or sparkling, you always say sparkling. I've stopped asking the table too. Good. I've stopped asking the table. I'm like, Papa's home and he's claiming what's his. I love ordering sparkling waters at restaurants

because who knows, maybe I'll find my favorite. I still haven't found my favorite, though. But I never get still water that's in a bottle. No, no, that's a huge trap. That's a huge trap. Tap is fine. San Pellegrino is always fine. It is, like, markedly, markedly worse than the other ones. I think Perrier does a really good job.

But that's, I mean, when I say worse, I mean only for my own personal taste. Because I have, I want, when I use the SodaStream, I have the old analog one where like you have to press, not the one where you just press the button and it does it for you. You got to press it down and you control. You got to get the water from the well. I'm truly living in 2014. But you got to like press it hard. Yeah. And they're like one bump for a little bit, two for medium, three for hard.

I hit it four times, Nicole. I'm overloading it. It burns like McDonald's Sprite. Oh, that's nice. I hit it four times, Nicole. I'm overloading it. It burns like McDonald's Sprite. Oh, that's nice. So for me, Perrier, much better option, but we haven't talked about what is far and away the best. Can I say something? Perrier is

a little bit more bitter than San Pellegrino, which I don't enjoy as an accompaniment to my food. I agree. I find that I don't like it as an accompaniment to food either. I like it I find that I don't like it as an accompaniment to food either. You like it on its own. I like it on its own because Perrier to me...

Oh! I don't like Perrier in a can. Perrier in a can tastes worse than Perrier in a bottle. Perrier in a glass bottle... I can crush Perrier in a can like Lucas and I. Lucas and I,

whenever we had Perrier in the office, we would just hold it and look at each other like, hey, what's up? It was like a cool kid drink. I think Perrier in a can has a much higher mineral content, which is what you're tasting in bitterness.

And to me, the metal accentuates that. I like it in that context because around Lucas, I feel cool. There was some cultural shift. I would say like 2007 is when I remember going to an Angels game and seeing a Coors Light in like an aluminum bottle with a twist off. Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I remember aluminum bottles, yeah. They're like mostly at sports games.

Have you ever drank a beer out of one of those? No, because I really didn't go to sports games until recently and I married my husband. They have them at like concerts too. No, no, no. They don't do that anymore. You know what they do? They have the plastic cups where you put like a little thing on it and then it fills up from the bottom. What?

You know what I'm talking about? Meggie, we've been to a concert before or a show or something together. Yeah. And they give you a cup and then they fix it onto this little spout and then from the bottom up it fills it and then the little spout comes off at the bottom. We drank beers at this concert together that we were all at. Shout out to Pesh Mode for sponsoring the podcast and putting on a kick-ass show. You don't remember that? You literally go- No, they have now these like weird self-serve convenience stores within

Staples Center. Meggie, type in beer stadium fill up machine. I had a point to make. Look at this video. Shush! Shush! Look at this video. What? Watch. This is at Tottenham. This wasn't at Depeche Mode, though.

Are you sure? This is literally at the Tottenham Hotspur. Josh, look. You've never had this before? Every single concert venue or show I go to, they do this. Oh, my God. You've never seen. You're so.

The beer is filling up from the bottom. You take it, and then the little. It doesn't create a foamy head. I mean, it creates a perfect foamy head. Perfect. And then the little iPod pops off. Oh my God. Why is this news to you? I've never seen this.

I don't know. Shut up. This is not a new video. Okay. Well, my point was that drinking stuff out of aluminum kind of sucks. It tastes bad. A light beer out of those aluminum bottles tastes terrible to me. Well, what about Liquid Death?

Liquid Death sparkling water is not my jam either. Liquid Death water, perfectly fine. But Liquid Death sparkling water, they've added flavors to it. But to me, it's like very half carbonated and very half flavored in a way that I don't love. Again, love slamming some Liquid Death. I think they did a really awesome thing. I love canned water. The taste of it or?

I love liquid death in a can. Like just the water. I love drinking Tall Boys energy drinks and Tall Boys beer and I like there's a can that looks like that

so I feel cool. Do you ever drink it while you're driving and then you're always scared a police officer is going to stop you because they're going to think you're drinking a beer?

Yeah, especially because I emptied it out and put beer in there. No, I'm kidding. That's a crime. Don't do that. Sparkling water at restaurants. There's one brand to me that reigns supreme.

That's Mountain Spring. Aquapina. No, Mountain Valley. Mountain Valley. Mountain Valley? The green bottle. The green bottle. Yeah.

It's called Mountain Valley, right? I don't love that one. I like Aquapiana, I think it is. Aqu green bottle. The green bottle. Yeah. It's called Mountain Valley, right? I don't love that one. I like Aquapiana, I think it is. Aquapana. Aquapana. Yeah, yeah. It's a genteel bubble. A genteel French bubble.

I think that's my problem. Aquapana reminds me of Badoit. What is Badoit? Oh, she's never had Badoit. I thought you were a woman of culture. It's another French brand that, to me, Aquapana and Badoit are very similar. Very light bubbles, very high salinity, high mineral content. I like it.

I like it. I need to be blasted in the face a little bit. I see. I see. You know what's the biggest face blaster? Tell me, Nicole. Mineralgua. Oh, mineral.

Oh, my God. You're right. I was going to say, okay. Topo Chico? Topo Chico. I don't love Topo Chico the way everyone else does. Why not? Is it too harsh?

Abrasive bubbles, and they go away quick. They go away quick. Is it just me? Out of the glass bottle? Yeah. Is that just me? No way, dude. To me, it's like Willy Wonka's Everlasting Bubble Stopper in there, man.

I wouldn't be surprised if Topo Chico and Mineral Agua are actually made in the same facility. I just like the color of Mineral Agua more. And by color, I mean the bottle it comes in. And it's just like this weird, like psychological problem I have. I don't love Topo Chico that much. Yeah. If y'all don't know what Mineral Agua is, it is the Jarritos brand, which like the greatest sodas in existence. Oh, Jarritos Tamarindo. In my house, it is Mineral Aguas and Bubblies, but mostly Mineral Aguas. Oh, a good piña, a good piña soda. Haritos.

Haritos with tacos. Oh, my God. Well, yeah, but like I don't have that in my house. No, me neither, yeah. The guests, the guests will always be offered a Mineralgua at my house. Wait, I love that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mineralgua is, so Topo Chico and Mineralgua are to me the two harshest bubbles in the game,

which is what I'm looking for for my own personal taste in sparkling water, right? The difference to me is that Minaragua is almost a purely neutral flavor profile. Which is good for eating! Good to eat food with! It is like literally,

it's like you've added violence to water. Just pure violent sensation. And there is no actual taste. Whereas Topo Chico, I think you get a little bit of minerality, a little bit of that salinity, which I think really goes well, especially when you get the Topo Chico I think you get a little bit of minerality a little bit of that salinity which I think

really goes well especially when you get the Topo Chico with lime but then Mineragua comes in and it's just like there's nothing like it you ever start listening to a song

that is just almost purely silent with some ominous tones for like 20 seconds and then followed by just like the heaviest guitar riff you've ever heard I know a song like that

well it's actually it's like so Mineragua is like Stairway to Heaven interesting it's actually, it's like, so Mineralgo is like Stairway to Heaven. Interesting. It's like nice. It's like nice. It's beautiful.

And then it's this big crescendo when you tip the bottle. That's how I feel. And I think it's beautiful. That's, I want my sparkling water to crescendo. I want to be titillated the whole time. I want Mineralgo to titillate me, you know, and it does. Sounds illegal. Yes. I don't know. I guess I just, I just love Mineralgo. And Iate me. And it does. Sounds illegal. Yes, I don't know.

I guess I just love Minaragua and I think that might be my answer. I know it's a little bit early to say that, but I think I'm a Minaragua fan. I don't know that I'm not off of the Topo Chico train specifically because of the branding. That's another thing that we have to...

You like the branding of Topo Chico. We have to get into is the actual branding of it because LaCroix, nobody would have cared about LaCroix if it had not been on the cusp of that like 90s nostalgia

it's got what do they call it the font it's the font but it's also like the jazz cup the jazz cup jazz cup right

that jazz cup design with like very 80s office culture it's like normcore ironic and I don't think LaCroix would have taken off

if not for that sure sure is it LaCroix or is it LeCroy? It's LeCroy. Okay. It's, it's a, I believe a city in Wisconsin

and there's a ton of weird French names. In Wisconsin. In Wisconsin. Wisconsin. Wisconsin. Wisconsin. So, but they've officially

come out and said it's LeCroy. Cool. But is the show Emily in Paris or Emily in Paris? I've never seen it. You've never seen Emily in Paris?

No. Lily Collins is like a freaking gem. I've heard. How charming. It've never seen it. You've never seen Emily in Paris? No. Lily Collins is like a freaking gem. I've heard. How charming. It's not for me. Are you sure? I think it would be for you. She like falls, no spoilers,

falls for like a chef. I'm not interested. Oh, I learned to make French cuisine of my family. Everybody falls in love with the chef and then they get their heart broken or they get cancer or something happens. I don't want it.

I don't need it. I'm not interested. Don't talk bad about that Zoe Saldana show on Netflix where the chef gets cancer. That was nice. That was actually really sweet.

It was really beautiful. I love you some Zoe Saldana. Okay, branding and other sparkling waters that would maybe turn you off. Waterloo. It makes me feel like

I might not spray farm. Yeah, it freaks me out. The Waterloo branding freaks me out. Yeah, yeah. I don't know how I can do it. Spindrift. It makes me feel like I'm at Knott's Berry Farm. Yeah, it freaks me out. The Waterloo branding freaks me out. Yeah, yeah. I don't know how I can do it. Spindrift. It reminds me of like you're at like a weird card shop,

like a weird bespoke card, not Hallmark, but like not Hallmark, not Paperless, whatever it is. Nope. Paper Source. It's not Paper Source. It's almost got a little bit of like at the TJ Maxx checkout line. Oh, I disagree. Where there's the weird

food products. Oh, no, I disagree. I feel like I could see a Spindrift sitting there. It gives me Los Feliz homemade bespoke card reader.

Oh, interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kind of minimalist. Too minimalist, yeah. Do you think if Spindrift had different branding that you would enjoy it? No.

Do you think it actively takes away from your enjoyment of Spindrift? Yeah. Because that's something that I think about a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Spindrift, we love you.

Let us design your new cans. I'm not good at drawing. I don't think it's bad. I don't think it's bad design. I like the kind of, you know, minimalist aspect of it, especially because it's

a product that it's just, it's lemon juice, it's sparkling water, it's great. Oh my God, Polar, the little Polar bear that's like cold. Polar.

Polar. That Polar seltzer's old school. I need to look at it. Hold on. Polar has sweetener in it, though, I believe. Not all of it, not all of it. I think it's so cute. But I've like cold? Polar. That polar seltzer is old school. I need to look at it. Hold on. Polar has sweetener in it though, I believe. Not all of it. Not all of it.

I think it's so cute. I like polar's packaging. Too old school. That's the seltzer of my grandfather. I'm not drinking it. Schweppes is the seltzer of your grandfather. Canada dry. I literally didn't even put Schweppes. I drank a plain Schweppes soda water the other day because it was like all I had and we bought

it for cocktail mixers because that's the only reason you would use Schweppes for whatever reason. Same, same, same. But yeah, you're correct. That's the, Polar is like the seltzer of your Gen X uncle.

You know what I mean? But I feel like it's more East Coast. I don't see a lot of Polar here. No, no, no, no, no. What else is there? Bubbly. So we actually,

Je refuse. Oh really? We just switched over from La Croix to Bubbly In our household Why I don't know David just wanted to shift

I said okay Whatever you want babe I'm not going to ask Too many questions And it's good I think it's because They're on sale a lot That adds up

Bubbly is it Tar Bubbly is a Coca-Cola Product right Let me see I don't know There's another one Another new one

Hit the market Is called Maggie do you spell Bubly like Michael Bublé? Oops. PepsiCo. Oh, it's PepsiCo. In the commercials. There's a new product from Coke, I believe, called AHA.

I've never tasted it. Have you had AHA? Uh-uh. Uh-uh. Uh-uh. Not AHA. They have a caffeinated version, which is bad. But they also did a cherry cola sced seltzer, which is horrifying.

I actually really like cherry-scented sparkling waters. Interesting. They kind of make me feel like I'm drinking a soda a little bit. Just a little. But there's so many out there, and so many of them to me are the same, right? Bubbly is the same as AHA, is roughly the same as Waterloo, is probably the same as LaCroix, except LaCroix has, to me,

more brand sweat equity built up, so I'm going to drink that. To me, where you really get into the fun stuff, Spindrift makes an incredible product. I understand why you wouldn't like it. Sure. A little bit of raspberry juice, a little bit of lime,

a lot of sparkling water. Raspberry juice, though? Dude, the new, have you had this? The strawberry lemonade is so good. No. It's not artificial strawberry flavor. It's a little bit of strawberry juice.

No. It's good. It tastes natural and healthy. It's like a spa water. It tastes healthy? Yeah, it does. It's just juice and water, man. That's ED coded.

What? I'm just kidding. I want a little bit of juice. There's nothing wrong with wanting a little bit of juice in your sparkling water. I just can't wrap my head around it, and I don't enjoy it, and I'm entitled to my wrong opinion. As much as you support women's rights, I also need you to support women's wrongs, Josh. I hereby support all women's rights, wrongs, and in-betweens, except for, like, the ones who do crimes. Well, the bad crimes.

Women who do good crimes, I'm in support of. Me too. Jaywalking. Keep it up. Jaywalking to save a baby from a bus. Don't ever stop doing that. Don't stop doing that, women. Drink more Minaragua is what we're saying.

Yeah, not to say you have to buy stocks in Minaragua. I might. Minaragua's the winner. We're shorting Waterloo. Woo, let's do it. All right, Nicole. You've heard what you and I have to say. Well, now it's time to find out what other wack yetis are railing out there in the universe.

It's time for a segment we call... Opinions are like casseroles. I used to remember I used to sing them. I don't do that anymore. I miss your singing. Can you, come on. Come on, Nicole. What do you want?

Give me a song for the old times. What do you want? What do you want me to sing? Purple Rain. I never meant to cause you any trouble. I never meant to cause you any pain. I never meant to cause you any pain. That's it. All right.

Well, that was pretty good, actually. I was kind of feeling where those vibes were going. Purple rain, purple rain. That's it. Okay, I'm done. You got another couple bars for us? I'm good. All right, let's get to that first.

Hi, Josh and Nicole. This is not food related. I mean, i guess it kind of is but i'm playing fortnite right now and the glizzy skin just reminds me of josh i don't know why maybe trevor will appreciate this that's it have a great day love you both uh love you this is great i've never played a fortnite it's definitely modeled after you. The glizzy skin. It is. Okay, so this is an anthropomorphized hot dog. It's wearing jeans.

It's got a lot of swag. The body of this anthropomorphic hot dog is covered in mustard, but it's also wearing an open short-sleeve button-down shirt, it appears. But it is modeled after relish. And a puka shell hot dog necklace. Which I do love that combination. I need to get some more pukes, though. Emily might actually be making me some pukes.

Which is cool. A puke is also a meth pipe. Not that. A puki? Not that. Is that what puki is? Have you seen puki on TikTok? Yeah, I don't like them. I love puki. What? I don't like that gobb love Pookie. What? I don't like that

gobbledygook. They freak me out. Me and Pookie are in Venice. She's looking beautiful as ever. Now, Pookie is both a pet name and also

a meth pipe. And I know that because once I was out by the train tracks in Burbank, just hanging out sometimes. I used to sneak

cigarettes out there sometimes. I don't smoke anymore. Don't smoke. It's bad. But then somebody came up to me and just went,

Hey, you got me? And they said the S-H-I-T word. And I said, Oh, no, you have me confused for somebody. And then they just go, you got a pookie? Hey, you got neat. And they said the S-H-I-T word. And I said, oh no, you have me confused for somebody. And then they just go, I got a pookie. And I went, that's great.

I have no idea what that means. And then I urban dictionaryed it. Backwards hat, snapback, sunglasses, puka shells, open shirt, got a lot of swag. This glizzy skin is modeled after me. I will be suing Fortnite. Swag.

You know, oh, I really like how swag and riz can just be used interchangeably. Interchangeably? No, but you don't swag somebody up. And you do, I... You have swag if you can riz somebody up. Correct.

I've actually found myself using the term riz unironically. And almost I back myself into a corner because if somebody were like, oh my God, he sure rizzed her up. Like, what is another way to say that even? You really charmed her. That sounds old timey. That sounds like you're wearing a newsboy cap.

I'm an old timey girl. He really charmed her. That's too like self-serious, you know? What? Rizzing somebody up is almost a combination of charm and swag, right? Is she down? Is she down? It's almost putting the onus all on the woman, and you know what? That's a

problem. I actually, no, I agree with that. Why are they putting the onus on the woman? It's only an active verb on a man. He rizzed her up. Yeah, get out of here. For shame. But like, did she, she could have rizzed him up. She could have rizzed her up. Okay. You know, this is gender neutral. This is not. No, how often do you hear she rizzed

him up or she rizzed her up? Never. Or he rizzed him up. Rizz doesn't even include the LGBTQ plus community and that's a problem. Heteronormative patriarchy is involved in the term rizz. I denounce it. No more rizzing. We are all merely...

I called... Was it you that I called a woman handsome yesterday? Or no, it was V. I called a woman handsome. I think that's like... Yeah. I think they're like... I tend to be very attracted to handsome women, right?

Much different than like a hot chick, right? Like, no, that's like a very handsome... Hilary Swank, very handsome woman. I think you're equating masculine features with handsomeness. Is it? Are you? I don't know. I don't think so.

There's like a certain amount of like buttoned upness to a handsome woman. Are you equating masculine features with handsomeness? Is it? Are you? I don't know. I don't think so. There's like a certain amount of like buttoned upness to a handsome woman. Okay. You know? I don't know. Anyways, what are we talking about? I like handsome people and hot people. Yeah, I'm a handsome guy. I like both.

Time and place. Hi, Nicole and Josh. Nicole, I know you're not much of a meal prep girly, but Josh, I was wondering, because I know you are a meal prep girly, what do you suggest to make meal prep not so miserable by the time you get to day four or day five of eating the same thing that has been sitting in the fridge

for a long time? This is Rachel from New York. Love the show. Thank you, guys. Bye. Great question. You got to switch up the accoutrement, right? Yeah.

So say you're doing like a chicken and rice, and say you're doing like, I don't know, let's say adobo or something. The first day, soy sauce, garlic. Let's do chipotle because I feel like not everybody makes adobo at home. What do you mean chipotle? Like people make chipotle rub chicken more than adobe sure sure sure say you have like a chipotle rub chicken whatever that you're eating with like rice and zucchini or something uh and you're eating that and then when you get to day three or four then it's like all right we have almost like a

supplemental meal prep pack that you're waiting to deploy on day three, which is like a corn salsa or like an herby sauce. In place of... And then maybe you're sauteing that chicken with the rice. Maybe you're cracking an egg in there. If you're just microwaving it in the meal prep tins, that's a different story. Maybe you have some scallions, maybe you have some egg, but there's always a way. And I found this out organically because I would get to day four of meal prep,

and I don't meal prep religiously at all, but I would get to day four and be like, this sucks. I just need to change this up. I mean, I used to meal prep here and there too. By day four, you're like, you want to vomit. So like a great example, you have chipotle chicken with, say, zucchini and rice. You get to day four, have a jar of kimchi in the fridge, crack an egg into a pan, mash that up.

You have chicken, kimchi, fried rice. Really? So I feel like a good way to do it is like incorporating some cooked veg and some raw veg. So it's not as monotonous because sometimes like cooked zucchini or like cooked cabbage can get a little bit grossed four days later, you know? But something like a prepackaged salad. Sulfuric volatiles. Sure, whatever. Arielle Johnson, man.

She's changed the face of our podcast. So cute. But like whatever, like sometimes those vegetables that are cooked like broccoli in the fridge after three days, it stinks. It really does smell. So I think just switching up, I agree with you saying switching up,

but maybe like sometimes you have cooked veggies Sometimes you have a salad Sometimes you have, I don't know, something else Just to cut through it So your proteins are the same Because protein, when it marinates and is just sitting there over time I feel like it tastes better Yeah

A lot of the time Yeah, glutamates are forming Also especially like whenever like meal prepping Like taking a large hunk of meat and cooking it and braising it for a long time, shredding it up is also better than like a chicken breast that you cook. I feel like it has more resilience. It has more resilience and it's like tougher. It's easier to like heat up and warm up. Yeah, you've already cooked it to death.

There's no, it doesn't get dry. Exactly. Exactly. So I think maybe changing the meats that you're using, something a little bit larger that can take a longer braise that won't, like, get dried out and gross, and then changing your veggies out to sometimes cooked veggies, sometimes a salad might really change it up. Yeah, but either way, you need to plan for it.

You need to have that day two, day three, day four deployments ready, you know? And when all else fails, hot sauce. Yeah. Pickles. I just don't like meal prepping. Yeah, meal prepping kind of sucks, man. I'm kind of over it. I think for me it's just the fun.

I go home and it feels good to cook a meal from scratch that takes 30, 35 minutes. Yeah. I enjoy that in my life. Now that I've stopped doing two-a-day workouts and I have my nights mostly free, meal prepping is out. Spending two hours to make chicken cordon bleu from scratch and eating at 9 p.m. That's in, baby. I don't like eating at night like that.

Not worth it. Chicken cordon bleu, not worth it. If you had a hankering saying, hey, maybe I should make chicken cordon bleu tonight, don't do it. Don't do it. Just go get it. Make a chicken cutlet and put a slice of ham and cheese on it. It's just better. Chicken cordon bleu.

Hi, this is Emma. I'm a middle school teacher in Washington. And my opinion is that Cheez-Its are properly rated in their use as a simple snack food for lunches on. But they are highly underrated in their versatility. I have made Cheez-It nachos. I have used Cheez-Its as dip crackers. I have used Cheez-Its to bread chicken strips. The extra big Cheez-Its especially, great strips. The extra big Cheez-Its especially. Great for dipping and people sleep on it all the time. Okay. Thanks. Love the podcast.

Bye. Thank you for your service. I love Cheez-Its. Same. I thought they were going to end their opinion with Cheez-Its are properly rated. I was kind of thinking like, yeah, they are. They've had their success. They've been given their plot it's very appropriately

I like Cheez-Its a lot we talked about Cheez-Its versus Goldfish with Trevor right? yeah we did Cheez-Its all the way

baby 100% such a unique cheesy flavor which I think where they're coming at in terms of using Cheez-Its in

culinary application I think a thing you gotta ask yourself anytime you cook with something is like is this a proprietary flavor

I feel like Mark Cuban right now. Is this proprietary? But like, is it a flavor that you can't get from anything else? And Cheez-Its to me have a very unique flavor in the sense that it's that toasted, oxidized cheese flavor that you get from like a cheddar crisp. So good. I don't know. I love it.

I just love it. I would eat a Cheez-It right now. We probably have. Surely there's a Cheez-It in this office. We can find it. Go get it. A great Caesar salad, crushed.

I love more the crushed bread crummy style of crouton in a salad, right? I don't. You like big hunkin' croutons? I love a big hunkin' fresh crouton.

I want just like crispy bread crumbs enveloping my lettuce. That's how I make my Caesars. I used to be like you. And then you say yourself you love the flavor of a fried thing dumped in sauce. Oh, I feel you.

Yeah, I know. A properly saturated crouton. Nothing like it. I feel like Caesar dressing is too thick if it's proper to saturate. Disagree. Anywho, crush up some Cheez-Its. Use that in a Caesar salad. You get almost like

that Parmesan crisp flavor from the oxidization of that cheese. You know what I love about us? We can disagree, but still have a good relationship. Yeah, no,

while the cameras are rolling, we can have a good relationship. Like, we just don't see eye to eye on certain things, and that's so okay. And we're still friends.

It's beautiful. I think it's so necessary. The world needs to be more like you and i what the political is the political is that which divides friend and enemy carl schmidt love sweet love and his book on the concept of the political he explains why the world assassins will ultimately fall short you're a hired hand when they're only fighting for money nicole and that money drives up where they live. No, it is a political bond that, that,

uh, actually unites us. What are we talking about? What's he talking about? Hey, Josh, Nicole, Maggie,

the rest of the unsung crew of the podcast. Hey, so I don't know if this is controversial, but definitely something unique. So my parents have always made homemade flour tortillas, totally from scratch, absolutely delicious, no tortilla press, a little bit thicker, a little bit fluffier. But a snack that I've done intermittently since I was a kid is dipping that tortilla in a little

bit of ketchup or dipping the tortilla in gravy, not necessarily matcha and gravy, but just gravy. Again, I don't know if this is controversial, but, hey, embrace your inner fat kid, right? I would say my inner fat kid is, it's like my guiding light. Like in, like, the Golden Compass, right? Every child has, like, a demon. Never read it? Like an animal that's, like, guiding them. Is it a book?

Yeah, yeah. Great book. Anyways, I'm very curious where they're from and what their background is. I don't know, but I've been there and I've done that with like a mission tortilla. It's so good. But also I used to make like little ketchup pizzas. You know what I mean? With like mission tortillas.

I think that damn near any bread product can just be dipped in ketchup or dipped in ranch. And it's going to be a fun time. I used to just dip white bread in ketchup. I never did that. But the tortillas and ketchup make total sense. Actually a homemade tortilla. Homemade tortilla and gravy certainly. Right.

That's just a good little gravy stop right there. Sounds so good. It's ridiculous. I'm 100% down. I don't know if it's controversial or not. I think it sounds lovely. I thought they were going to say cinnamon, butter, like cinnamon, butter, sugar, or just butter and sugar in a tortilla. I love that.

So that's a fun time as well. Do you think I'm just hungry right now, which is why I want Cheez-Its? Yeah, probably. I'm so hungry. I had two eggs, though, for breakfast. That's like nothing. It's 120 calories and 12 grams of protein. Yeah, I'm going to go get it.

I had two whole breakfast sandwiches. Breakfast. Breakfast. Breakfast sandwiches. Breakfast. All I had two whole breakfast sandwiches. Breakfast? Breakfast. Breakfast sandwiches? Breakfast. Alright, we got time for one more? Yeah! Come on, Maggie. Also, it's Maggie. Hey, Josh and Nicole. My controversial food take is that the best snack I have ever had

is Hot Talkies Wavy dipped in a really creamy brie cheese. Oh, yes! The combo with the heat and the potato Dipped in a really Creamy brie cheese Something about that combo With the heat and the potato chip And the cheese is just Unbelievable Found it by accident while on a picnic

Because we happened to have hot Hot talkies Hot talkies ladies And brie cheese Also Josh 1v1 me in a rocket league Scrub I bet you won't Did they put their handle in? DM me your gamer tag

I'll 1v1 you 1v1 is a vulgar form of Rocket League 3v3 I know standard Too crowded 2v2 that is the game of kings It's the only thing I play anymore You out there playing Rocket League? I watched

I like watch is the Game of Kings. It's the only thing I play anymore. You thought they were playing Rocket League? I watched it. So, I like watch, I grew up watching men play video games and I was just their friend on the side just watching and that's followed me

into my 30s with my husband and he's like, I want to teach you how to play and I said, no! No,

I just want to watch. I tried to teach Julie how to play. But for real, DM me your gaming tag. I don't have any of the headsets that you can talk to people on, but you can hit me with all the what-if saves that you want in the chat.

I love watching Rocket League. I don't know. Do you think they're good? I don't know. Maybe. My rank has been precipitously dropping. Bet you won't. I love that she said that.

Josh loves a challenge. One-on-one, I'm okay. I'm pretty good at converting defense to offense, doing a little running gun. What color is your car? Do you pick it? It's either blue or orange, depending on what team you are.

I forgot the build that I have. I bet you if they did skims, like how skins... Skins? They do that. They do custom ones. Imagine they were wearing skims. Those are sexy.

They would make money. You could buy skins. Yeah, they thought of that too did they do that yeah yeah oh they do that oh yeah great

I've never had talkies waves why are you laughing at me it's just funny it's not funny it's funny to me it's a real question it's funny to me I've never had talkies waves

it'd be like going to a hamburger restaurant and just be like man if they sold fries and you're like oh now they got those too and you're like oh shoot I thought I I've never wanted to hit you but I I just want to give you one of these.

You know, like, stop, you're being silly. You have permission to hit me if you want. Ow, what the fudge? I have never had, you've never had Takis waves. I would absolutely love to try them right now, though. I want them. I want it, I want it, I want it. I have a pretty unique problem with them, though.

They're a potato chip. They're a wavy potato chip with presumably the Takis powder dust all over them. I don't think the potato flavor and texture goes as well with spice as corn. But these waves look like deep waves. Like, remember those chips that we liked that were the deep wave ones? This is the product image rendering on the bag. We need to find out what they actually look like. Why don't you do your part?

We are freaking trying, Nicole. As a journalist. Look at the picture of it. That said, any sort of Takis with brie? These are deep ridges. Where are you seeing? Oh, my God. Yeah, these are.

Oh, my God. You ever see those pictures? It's like world's largest slug, and it's on somebody's hand. I just looked up a picture of what these freaking chips look like and it is unbelievable. I want to try all of these. Wow. You know what I want to do? I want to do the blue one and the red one and I want to

eat them at the same time. Oh my God, make a purple Takis chip? Yeah. Taki powder, it's just it is the farthest you can push flavor without physically deteriorating people's bodies, minds, and souls. You cannot get more flavorful than a Taki Nitro. They have a flavor called Dragon Sweet Chili.

Taki's way better. That's all I want. Josh, I want to buy it. You take that with just that little bit of funky brie, that triple creme with all that fat, all that fat and all that funk combining with all that spice and all that acid, that is the most flavor that if a 19th century factory worker ate this combination

of foods, their head would simply explode. They could not comprehend it. Nicole? I found the dragon talkies waves, but it's one bag and it's $15. You get it. We can't afford not to. $15 for one bag of chips? Yeah, write it off one bag and it's $15. Get it. We can't afford not to.

$15 for one bag of chips? Yeah, write it off for taxes. You're going to let me do it? Okay, Maggie? Yeah, sure. Why not? Okay. Yay! Okay, this is so exciting.

Can I buy the other ones too? Yeah, how much money do we spend on this podcast? We spend like no money. It's great. Okay, great. Yeah, I love brie cheese and I love Takis and I'm sure I would love this combination of flavors and I'm going to eat these and let you know how it goes. Yeah.

That rules, man. Yeah. That's a fun time. Great opinions. Yeah. Are we done with the podcast now? We should get some food in you, buddy. I'm so hungry.

Yeah. We got to get some cheese to send you a stat. Well, on that note, thank you for listening to a hot dog is a sandwich. I got to pee. I drank three of the corys throughout this whole thing You did you did I'm done We got new audio only episodes every Wednesday Video version out on YouTube on Sunday

You know the deal Yeah if you want to be featured on Opinions or at Casseroles Give us a call at 833-DOG-POD-1 The number again is 833-DOG-POD-1 We also do I stepped on you I was kind of ad-libbing I was

I was ad-libbing so you were doing like carnatic singing you ever watch carnatic music videos it's like a violinist paired with a singer no

and they're like it's all it's improvisational and there's standards of course much like jazz but oh my god it's beautiful so like it's like a jam band

like a little bit but also you gotta be like really in sync with each other you know okay beautiful

what do you think I'm thinking of one two three tomato seeds tomato seeds you idiot say what you wanna say see y'all next time