Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Schulz CANT Understand ASIAN?
Episode Date: April 7, 2022The boys chop it up about Elon Musk buying twitter, TI getting angry about jokes, Albert Pujols leaving his wife 5 days after brain surgery, NCAA Championship, and Lastly, Youtuber Jake Tran Joins the... podcast to discuss youtube, taekwondo, and Being Famous Now! INDULGE! Flagrant 2 is a comedy podcast that delivers unfiltered, unapologetic, and unruly hot takes directly to your dome piece. In an era dictated by political correctness, hosts Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh, along with AlexxMedia and Mark Gagnon, could care less about sensitivities. If it’s funny and flagrant it flies. If you are sensitive this podcast is not for you. But if you miss the days of comedians actually being funny instead of preaching to a CHOIR then welcome to The Flagrancy. #TrendingNow New York native and internationally touring stand-up, Andrew Schulz is known for his hilarious and unsafe comedy. He has starred in the sitcom BENDERS (now available on Netflix), can be seen in Amazon’s SNEAKY PETE, HBO’s CRASHING, and on MTV including GUY CODE and GIRL CODE. In the podcast realm, Schulz can be heard on the wildly popular THE BRILLIANT IDIOTS — co-hosted by nationally syndicated radio and television personality Charlamagne tha God — the hilarious sports commentary podcast FLAGRANT 2, and the film and TV analysis podcast WESTERBROS. He has made major appearances on The Joe Rogan Experience, Bert Kreischer’s BERTCAST, Joey “coco” Diaz The Chuch of What’s Happening Now, and Theo Von’s This Past Weekend. He has even done solo interviews with the likes of Lil Duval and many others. Andrew’s online presence has touched hundreds of millions of people across the globe and his unconventionally funny approach to the comedy world has launched him into stardome. His shows Dropping In and Inside Jokes will rack of hundreds of thousands of views weekly. Nothing is off limits for Schulz, from sex to race, and even the occasional audience heckler roast, Andrew is hungry to be the best. He can be seen in New York City performing regularly at New York Comedy Club and the Comedy Cellar.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I'm not racist, he has an accent!
Pause.
This is Jake Tram, YouTube extraordinaire, my personal friend, and overall a great guy.
And this is Andrew Schultz, aka kind of an idiot.
Just watch the next 10 seconds and you'll see why.
So, at the time, I was doing Taekwondo.
I was a competitor and coach.
What's Taekwondo for us old people?
Taekwondo?
Yeah.
Taekwondo.
The Korean martial art.
Oh, Taekwondo, dude.
I thought you said Tech Window, Taekwondo, dude. I thought you said tech window.
Taekwondo.
Dude, he said,
you were just saying,
hold on, hold on.
Relax.
God damn it, dude.
You just said.
What a fucking idiot you are.
Jesus Christ.
How dumb are you, dog?
He just said, he watched a lot really trying to be like Charlie Rose
or something
listen
you just said
you watched a lot y'all have made it worse
you know that right
what y'all do is way more disrespectful
what y'all do is way more disrespectful
I made it
I made it
for a mistake
give out a documentary
he said he watched a lot of tech YouTube.
Mark, he's Brownlee.
And then he said he started working for Tech Window.
I couldn't believe those words were coming out of your mouth.
Boom.
I watched it happen.
Like a fucking train accident.
I was like, wait, is he actually asking this question?
Life went slow motion for a little when he started saying it.
I was like, there's no way he's crazy.
Wait, can you explain there's no way
i'm watching you say this i'm like there's no fucking way this is happening right now he said
you misspoke bro just be honest like
it's a it's a mistake i mean it's so fucking clear it's taekwondo be honest you guys thought
it was taekwondo no dead ass is taekwondo let's just i was giving you benefit of the doubt yeah
but when i rewatched it it's so obviously taekwondo That's Aguando. It's Aguando. It's Aguando. You see? You see? No, no, no.
And Al, now that we're not on the episode, he took that shit out of me.
I ain't got to say that.
That ain't that shit, bro.
Yo, I didn't know what he was saying the whole interview.
No, it's just that part.
I was like, where's the subtitles of this shit?
That's why he didn't have no questions.
Yo, after the episode, I was telling Al Jake's name, and Al was like, wait, you don't give him a number?
Oh, my God. I thought it was quick.
Remember he said that?
You called him 456.
No.
I was like, he's trans?
That's a good one.
His last name is Tran.
Okay.
But no, in all seriousness,
and we have the Jake Tran,
the full interview where I'm vindicated.
At the end of this episode,
we have the full one where I'm vindicated.
Do you have the part, at least go to the part
where I ask him to say
Taekwondo and Taekwondo back to back?
I don't know.'re out we sound so crazy can you just play the beginning of that again is that possible
can we just play the very beginning i've never heard mark just cuss me
this is mark's god mark loves this fucking guy for years
oh gee early adapter like he was all over
Jake Tran
I love Jake too bro
this guy
I love Jake
we love Jake
with all the love
in my heart
he don't know
how to speak Taekwondo
he don't know
how to say Taekwondo
he don't know
how to say Taekwondo
Taekwondo
Taekwondo
Taekwondo
he says Taekwondo
he said it with a little
flair
that flair
why don't you say nothing
he says it wrong I was curious about was curious about tech window i wanted to know
if it wasn't until mark called you a fucking idiot and i was like
he goes mark literally i've never heard mark speak this way to me in my life he just goes he goes
you fucking idiot.
I couldn't believe it, bro.
I couldn't believe it.
Oh, my God. Why not is what he said.
Go to the part where I ask him to say taekwondo and taekwondo back to back.
Pick it up from the beginning.
No, no, no, no, no.
There's a part.
This is what matters.
Say taekwondo.
Taekwondo.
Now say taekwondo.
Taekwondo.
Shut the fuck up all of you forever.
Shut the fuck up all of you forever.
Fuck your life.
Fuck your life.
You're good.
That's just the same.
Stop it.
You can't say.
Stop it.
Dude.
Come on, son.
Completely serious?
Completely serious.
Completely serious.
Them shit sounded very similar. Damn, son. Not the first time, son. Completely serious? Completely serious. Them shit sounded very similar.
Damn, guys.
Not the first time, though.
The first time was very clear as Taekwondo.
He was talking about Taekwondo before with Marquise Brownlee.
It sounded the same, but you just got it with the context.
Also, what an Asian name for a brat guy.
Brownlee? You were doing so good. Brownlee, right? an Asian name for a Brat guy? Oh my God. Groundly?
You were doing so good.
Groundly, right?
But I just call him a Brat guy.
Is it slowly?
Did I catch it?
Yeah.
Yeah, you might have got it.
The fact that you thought
he just made up a thing.
You know what?
I saw the look of curiosity
in all y'all's faces.
Y'all were just too soft
to ask the question.
Yo, yo, yo.
I understand English.
That's what I'm guilty of. I understand understand english that's what i'm guilty of i understand
english is that what i'm doing does it make me racist to understand english hey hey break it
down for me what is tech window it's what he said Mark, you're so embarrassed. Mark, you're so embarrassed, yo. Where's Mark calling me a fucking idiot?
You listen already?
Yo, that was good.
You said...
Dude, he said...
You just said...
Also, look what Al got on his shirt.
Look at the wrapper.
Look at the wrapper on the shirt
that Al decided to wear.
Yo, you are the wildest, dog.
What is the name of the wrapper on your shirt that y'all decide to wear. Yo, you are the wildest, dog. What is the name of the rapper
on your shirt that you decide to wear?
His name is Chink's Drugs.
I thought it was Chingy.
I don't know what
Asian pharmacist did to you, but that was
fucking disrespectful, y'all.
I thought he would appreciate it.
Oh my gosh.
We both matching with the hair.
You want to you want to get
back to jake tran yeah yeah yeah i'm vindicated when he ran it back when he went he ran it back
it was closer but it was definitely very obvious he said taekwondo no no it wasn't i'll give you
this i feel like he was fucking with you because he felt disrespected after that first one he was
like i'm gonna make them shits mad close oh That was embarrassing, man. I can't believe you.
Y'all some haters, bro.
Shouts to Jake Tran, the motherfucking goat.
That was your oldest, whitest moment ever on this podcast.
Why, Al?
Why?
If we both understood it, y'all didn't grow up with any Asians.
That's your fault.
My best friend is Chinese.
Oh, my best friend.
I've heard that before. we know harold gerald
but gerald speaks the queen's english he does very well that that was not
it's a korean word bro say what it's a korean word i know what i'm saying is he's closer
word bro say what it's a korean word i know what i'm saying is he's closer he's closer to it he's closer what's wrong with saying that don't you think i have an easier time doing a british accent
then you know you hear british action sucks bro war I think it's pretty good. What are you talking about?
What is that?
Whoa, come on.
Titanic is sinking.
Where's my wife?
Getting fucked in a Model T Ford.
What is that?
It's more like, oh, what's up, mate?
All right, mate.
How you doing? Oh, then he turns Australian once he does that.
All right.
I fucking can't get out.
All right.
No, all right, bruv.
Hey, bruv.
Hey, bruv.
Won't you come on over and we'll put on some older suits and stuff.
Play dress up with the boys.
Yeah, you want to come on over with the boys and we'll just grab each other's knobs a bit?
Come on, we'll just grab each other's knobs a bit.
Let me suck your bellend one time.
I'll take your bellend. I'll suck it down to my throat. And, you know, we'll just grab each other's knobs a bit. Let me suck your bellend one time. I'll take your bellend.
I'll suck it down to my throat.
And, you know, we'll see how far it goes.
I'll spread my ass.
You get your dick, put it in it.
Exactly.
First person to get it hard is gay.
You want to play that game, 69?
First person to get hard is gay?
Fuck, I'm going Australian again, aren't I?
You killed it, actually.
That was fire.
That was fire.
You really were in your tech window on that one.
I did.
You hit it.
Can we get back to the Jake Tran interview?
Yes.
Jake Tran is one of my favorite YouTubers.
That's one of Mark's favorite friends.
So we do have an interview with Jake Tran that you guys will experience, and it's filled
with...
But before we talk about that, can we talk about Elon Musk, buying 10% of Twitter?
We can talk about that.
Or should we talk about Albert Pujols being a boss?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Albert Pujols.
I don't know if you guys know he's a baseball player.
Baseball is a sport in America.
Kind of.
Kind of, yeah.
And basically, his wife was getting brain surgery.
And he clearly thought that she was going to die.
And she ended up living.
Damn.
So he divorced her right afterwards.
Bad or good? I think it's a good thing to do. to do talk to me look she's got a new lease on life so now he's like look take half my money and then go be
free oh is she getting caked up i'm sure it's a divorce she getting caked up somehow wow uh hey
you got you go live another life you got a second chance why? You know what I mean? Go live a second life.
Albert Pujols is a good man. Oh, he's doing this
for her. He's doing this for her. That's a good spin.
He's a charitable guy. Do you think that he was
hoping that she would die? Probably.
I don't mean it in a bad way. Maybe just forget
that she was married to him. Like the vow.
Like the vow, but he just leaves right
after. Yeah, exactly. Wait, what's the vow?
I never saw that shit. It's a romantic movie I've seen.
A wife gets amnesia and then the husband stays with her until she remembers everything oh is that with adam sandler that's no no it's channing tatum first dates 50 first dates i've
seen that same same to sam basically but one is a comedy and one is more romantic that 50 first
day shit is mad funny because does he smash day one i don't think so because like one day she's like i don't really give head and he was like yo dumbass sucking his dick crazy three days ago when i took you on a
fucking canoe you know what i mean like that you can find out if the girl's lying or not yeah yeah
yeah tech window my little tech window you know what'm saying? What do you guys think about Albert Poodle? I don't speak Spanish.
I mean, actually.
But like,
Alex only apparently is not really the case.
Why not?
They've been separated for a long time.
Huh?
The divorce just went through.
He was doing this.
He was?
What?
What are you saying, what? What?
What are you saying, bro?
Whoa, whoa, yeah, whoa.
What's the information you got about this?
Hey, what you got?
Tell us some things that's going on.
Yeah, but you wouldn't pay for it, man.
So if Brain had a little case of the fuzzy wuzzies.
I think so.
And he just tried to carve it out.
I think so.
All right, so what happened?
Hey, Al. Bro. I got to right, so what happened? Hey, Al.
Bro.
I got to split checks again.
Al, Al, Al.
The hard tip game or something.
Tell us what happened, bro.
So she went in there.
Her head was a little bit wonky.
And they scooped out the wonky.
Yeah.
And then he just divorced her right then and there.
You got it.
You got it, bro.
All right.
This is the most insane part of the article.
Please tell me.
He goes, Pujols, a recent near certain Hall of Famer,
conceded that his timing was awkward.
He said in the statement about the divorce that the timing was awkward.
This is why.
Why?
I realize this is not the most opportune time with opening day approaching.
It's opening day, and other family events.
It's opening day, the day of the surgery?
Yeah, for sure.
Is that when they cut a fucking skull open
to scoop out the fuzzy wuzzy?
Jesus.
The wonky bit.
The wonky bit.
The wonky bit, innit?
Yeah.
Innit?
Innit.
Innit?
Yeah.
Innit?
I think it is.
All right.
Is there any more of the article you want to read us?
He was just tired of the lawyers dragging their feet.
And so he's like, yo, get this shit done with.
That's what it was.
Really?
Yeah.
Is it real?
I can't.
Whoa.
All right.
All right. All right.
Well, if it's not that crazy and it's time for him to get a divorce,
I guess it's pretty good.
Shall we move on to the other stories?
All right.
So, the other stories.
Wait, real quick.
The reason he didn't get divorced earlier is because he thought he'd keep
half his money if she died.
I think that that's death went more likely.
But now that she survived,
right? It's quite
a simple surgery when you think about it.
That's the other thing. Anytime you divorce or break up
with someone, it's always after something. Eventually.
You know what I mean? Like, oh, I was in a car accident
two months ago. He broke up with me two days
after my birthday. There's always some shit happening.
Yeah. Do you think she got the brain
cancer from not sucking
his dick up a lot?
I've heard that.
I think we need
to make wives know that.
I think it's
an important thing.
Remember when they said
that if you eat out girls
you get throat cancer?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Who said that?
That's what happened
to Andrew's voice.
Michael Douglas.
He was eating out a girl from Wales.
They're full of cancer, those girls.
He's the same guy who likes to hamster up his ass?
Nope.
That's Richard Gere.
That's Richard Gere.
How white?
There's too many of y'all.
If you were married to Cindy Crawford, you'd want some gerbils in your wanky box.
Wouldn't you?
Wouldn't you want some gerbils in your Toblerone maker?
That's a great joke, man.
Wouldn't you?
Stop throwing things at me, Mark.
Stop throwing things at me.
Okay. Oh, gosh. Oh, Mark. Stop throwing things at me. Okay.
Orkosh or Mark, what is the next topic?
Okay.
Let's see if you want to do this one.
Yeah.
TI apparently approached a comedian for making jokes about him.
Ah, this is true.
It was at a wee open mic in it yeah yeah it was
but uh yeah yeah there's a video that came out but i actually spoke to the girl and i spoke to
ti this morning uh separately but like uh and it was interesting so i don't know if you guys saw
the video do we want to play a little bit of it what do you guys think i can pull it up we also gotta get ti on the pod
eventually yeah yeah so what's happening is there's an open mic um what happened beforehand
is i'll do a little setup i guess what happened beforehand is that he came in to pop into the mic
he did some time uh he got off. She starts making fun of him.
He makes fun of her hair in the, her hair in like the hat.
And she responds with, you know, you got to talk about those allegations.
So then he goes, nah, we're not going to talk about that right now.
And then video.
It's Lincoln to charge me for.
No, shut the fuck up for a second.
Hey, listen.
No, no, no.
It's pretty tight that you joke all that shit, nigga.
I'm gonna check your motherfucking ass as long as it takes.
Nigga, when you stop talking about it, when you stop playing with me and mine,
I'm gonna stop saying something.
Nigga, ain't no motherfucking case.
Ain't never been no motherfucking case.
He's just dancing on stage.
Because I ain't did nothing wrong.
And my wife ain't did nothing wrong.
So the back story is they had like a little kind of beef or whatever, I think.
Even before this, he thought that they squashed it.
That's why he came to her mic, was doing some time.
Maybe he did a
longer amount of time then the back and forth about the hat happened and then ti's like you
know what do i what do i do i just let people say these things and you know basically i was telling
him it's like listen as a comedian you can't really tell people they're not allowed to joke
about you because you're just going to make them want to joke about you even more and i also
understand this girl it's like you know one coming from a place where like someone's
silencing her on her stage especially like a comic and saying you can't make these jokes yeah
you know it's yeah it's it's fucking sucks dude it fucking sucks but i told him i was like dude
you don't want to be the guy that says you can't joke around about me because then all comics are
going to want to joke around about you and they're not going to look at you as a real comic 100 but
i also understand him it's like what do i just let the world call me a fucking sexual predator or whatever but you
also got to keep perspective on like this is a an open mic or whatever this is like a small show
yeah it's not like this is gonna you made it go viral by acting like this it would have just died
right there yep you kind of got to let it sit and that's the thing comics sit on a high horse a lot
and talk shit and act like we got no skeletons,
but with a guy that's already famous, the skeletons are out.
Yeah.
So it's tough.
It's a tricky thing.
But that's also something that he got to recognize coming into the game.
Yeah.
If you go to a rap battle, for example, and you're talking shit about someone,
please believe they're going to bring up your craziest shit.
So these are the costs of coming
to the game and going back and forth with somebody you might never know they might drop some crazy
shit yeah you you can't not expect that yeah yeah it's like it's like you don't get to do
everything on your own terms in life yes and that's the tricky thing that he's in right now
yeah but i empathize for it's like imagine every time you say anything they just bring up some shit that has no bearing no case no nothing yeah it just taints who you are in your
legacy when there's no proof it's on the courts like yeah what is the status of that because last
i heard it was like allegations were brought up and then i think it got wiped away so there's not
even any charge made so it's like it's one thing if it's in the courts yeah but it's nothing if it's not and there's no charges then it just goes away and it was like oh people
trying to like me to them on some fake shit but everybody's acting as if it's real i could i could
empathize with how frustrating that is yeah but i also empathize with the comics like yo you're not
gonna tell me what i can or can't joke about no fucking chance you coming here to do the comedy
show especially my show telling me what i can't do nah not gonna happen fuck that yeah and that's
what i told her so it's a it's a tricky but that's the issue is you make a scene about it and then all of a sudden way more
people see it's like the streisand effect like by trying to block it and trying to close it out
it makes it bigger yeah i don't know what what are you what are you guys thoughts i mean like
ideally you like just kind of take it and then it eventually gets washed away yeah you know i mean
like eventually it just gets caught out like i didn't know really about the allegations until this video i didn't know either and that's the thing like he
might not realize he's gonna put more sauce on these things 100 you just let it fucking go you
made a mainstream with this but this will eventually wash away too like if you just don't bring this up
like just be cool for a while like this will go away and then the rest of it but you're gonna have
to eat some shit in the meantime you're gonna have to deal with a lot of people making jokes about it
now and you got to kind of know
that's if i want to keep doing comedy this is what's gonna happen i did that to me and this
is a learning lesson and then in a few years hopefully people stop doing that shit yeah
especially if you laugh at it assuming it's all untrue which she's claiming like the whole thing's
bullshit and there's no like legitimate charge in the courts yeah and another thing that happened
later in the video is like he goes on stage and and like takes the mic from her yeah which is you can't and he doesn't he's not he's like hugging
her first and then he just rips the mic but it's like i nah bro you can't do that you can't go up
to comedians you can't put can't touch them and you definitely can't remove microphones from
comedians especially you come in as a comedian yeah but i i understand he's coming from the
rap game where it's like fighting for your identity and your persona and your narrative is everything yeah
someone talks shit about you you've got to come back with a song yeah yeah so he's applying that
to the comedy game you come back with jokes yeah in this game and he runs with dc in them so he
knows like just pouring shit that you can go yeah you get if you get that muscle up and just go go
go you can win yeah all right guys we're gonna muscle up and just go go go you can win yeah
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Now let's get back to the show.
This combination of rappers, comedians, women's hair, weird sex shit.
It just makes for a bad combination, bro.
Yo, it's so true.
We're right back at square one.
But yeah, if I'm'm him i just handle this
off stage go up to her afterwards just be like yo you gotta stop saying shit that's not true
blah blah blah and just like handle it with her like well maybe you don't see what you've got to
just say hey man it's just that's something really hard hard for me like we're gonna see
each other we're both in the comedy scene yeah we're both trying to do this shit as comics like
i don't get why you're coming to me yeah like
on on this shit i get we're scoring you also got to say that because he started it so i get we're
scoring but like that's kind of a low blow because that shit isn't true i understand if that triggers
you in some way but you got to understand i'm actually innocent i know a lot of guys say that
and then whatever and then hopefully she believes you and then you can squash it but if you handle
it like that you have a much higher chance of squashing it than you do if you go up and grab the fucking microphone.
Yeah.
And then the video is out on Elon Musk's Twitter.
Yeah.
And then it's over, dude.
It's Elon Musk's Twitter now, by the way.
Yeah.
Elon Musk.
He got a board seat.
All of Twitter.
It's so funny.
And the first day, they go, he's going to have a, what is it called?
A non-authoritative role. Like when he bought the percentage there was like
a clause like this basically he doesn't have a say a passive role or something like that
and then the day later was like he's on the board yeah and of course you want him on the board you
want one of the most successful humans in history especially in the tech sector to be on the board
of an app he's the best twitter account yeah so of course you want that guy representing your brand and he's not as dangerous as like a
trump was you know trump's twitter was awesome yeah like he doesn't have the same radio activity
it's controversial but it's not the same yeah that's the guy that should own the majority of
twitter now what do you think he's doing this for what is the inspiration behind this i mean i know
what people are hoping that it is
yeah like but what do you think it is yeah i don't know i like i mean i'm i just trust that he's like
a savvy business sort of like mover and that he knows what he's doing kind of what he wants the
outcome to be but i mean equity in some major platform in terms of like you have all these
billionaires that buy up like media companies so like bezos buys up washington post like msnbc the ms is microsoft you know i mean like it's
owned by all these media companies are owned by billionaires so i'm assuming he's looking at this
is like oh this is the new wave of media so i'm going to try to buy in to the newest to the new
that would be really fucking smart so um were you going to say something else? I think he wants Twitter on the Tesla interface in cars.
Interesting.
For what reason?
Right now he has Spotify.
There's a few that he doesn't have.
And so I'm pretty sure they're blocking him from like including them in there because their interface is like you can't adjust it.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
You can't buy apps.
You can't add apps and shit like that.
Yeah.
And so what would be the advantage of having Twitter on?
Just makes it more cool.
Like, look at my cars come with Twitter.
As you have self-driving.
Hopefully you're self-driving.
Now, that's interesting.
Him being able to buy up or at least buy shares of these companies that he wants to incorporate
in the Teslas.
I think that's kind of fun.
That's interesting.
But to what Mark was saying, I think is quite interesting, is that once you become a billionaire,
you need a media apparatus to protect your wealth.
And it's not even billionaire.
Like back in the day, you just need, like Jeff Bezos needs something that's pumping
out positive Bezos shit and crushing his enemies.
And the crew will all do it.
Rupert Murdoch, everyone.
Every single one of them.
So the media is really an arm of the powerful.
And we've seen that in terms of powerful politicians.
But we also have to look at it in terms of powerful businessmen.
And in America, the businessmen and women, you could argue, have just as much influence in the government as the government.
Or maybe they're in cahoots.
Different discussion.
Who gives a fuck?
We'll change it all when I'm president.
in cahoots different discussion who gives a fuck uh we'll change it all when i'm president no but uh but i like that him going wow the the information landscape is not
washington post the information landscape is the apps themselves so if i'm an owner of these apps
not does he it's not that he can control truth but what he can do is control the erasure of truth.
Okay.
So remember he was tweeting a lot about COVID early on and he was like a little skeptical about COVID.
Right.
And he saw tweets getting taken down, people getting taken down for it.
were going to stop the work at his factory and all this other shit he can allow information that can combat a washington post article without getting wiped down right like there are certain
people that control the narratives what's acceptable what's not acceptable on twitter
some of the not acceptable stuff works out potentially in his favor right now he can fight
to make sure that's still there so he might not be as deliberate as a washington post would be which is like jeff why jeff bezos is the best man ever yeah but he can
make sure an article that is shitting on bezos gets just as much light yeah as an article
it's also just a smart move like why would you control the source of the information when you
could just control the marketplace the marketplace yeah now if he starts to have the same influence that a bezos has on the washington
post where you start to see it really being skewed in elon's favor that's where things get dangerous
that is kind of dangerous but you know apparently this is their solution to just not having him buy
the company outright that's what somebody said they were afraid because he's rich enough to just
buy fucking twitter whatever offer you want he can make it i mean 300 billion that's fine he could do that so they were like just give him the board seat
let's just keep him happy let's give him 10 and then this way he doesn't own the whole fucking
thing because there's there's one human being on earth rich enough to buy out twitter outright and
it's him wow he loves twitter i mean yeah yeah i'm also assuming that he sees this as like an
arm of his brand in terms of like marketing yeah like he doesn't spend any money on marketing and his twitter is the marketing for spacex and tesla
yep so he's like at the very least i will just have equity in my marketing yeah tesla doesn't
spend on traditional marketing dollars because he's the you have exactly now question he's um
he's he's suggesting i think twitter's also working on an edit function for tweets did you
see this yeah he had a poll should twitter allow an edit button and then i and then apparently
twitter came out and said they were also working on it they have been maybe for a while so maybe
this is them talking about it they had that already no no but like why is that advantageous
so i mean i'm assuming their thing would be like oh you can correct misinformation or like a fucking typo that kills a tweet but just delete right but if you have this tweet that goes
super crazy viral like you can correct it and you can edit things to make them more accurate like
i'm sure that would be like the marketing spin that they would want this so the problem with it
is like you get everybody to retweet something you say, then you edit it into saying... Foul shit.
Yeah, that happens on Reddit.
Like, you can edit, like, Reddit comments.
And so, like, some people just do that for fun.
Like, yo, upvote this comment to make the post look crazy,
and then it'll get crazy upvotes,
and then they'll just change the comment to just be some wild shit.
And then it's like, why did everyone upvote this?
But it'll say edit at the top,
so then you can kind of put the clues together.
Got you.
Okay, at least...
I'm just trying to understand, like, what is the advantage of this edit button it's like taking down a youtube
video and then putting back up it's out of the algorithm yeah that's how it hurts you so if it's
like oh it's just a fucking typo i would love to correct this i don't want this sitting there as
it gets momentum then you just you can correct it uh because articles can edit themselves on
or not edit themselves but like new york times can put like an addendum to an article and be like no
oh like this is actually a correction and if twitter is looking at themselves
as a newspaper it's like oh we should allow journalists like all every journalist in the
world that twitter is their home base now i'm understanding i was thinking it was about like
you said something foul and you're gonna get canceled for it but it's editing it's the new
york times editing their headline that's on twitter. Right. It's the New York Times.
That's what I'm assuming.
I don't know.
COVID killed this many people.
No, no, no.
Now that you know it didn't, don't put out that new tweet that nobody's going to see.
You edit the one everybody saw.
Correct your shit.
And if you don't correct it, we're going to look at it as misinformation and we will take it down.
Right.
Oh, interesting.
That's what I'm assuming.
I don't know.
But Twitter's biggest thing is journalists journalists and like academics and like people like having hot takes
and like trying to combat misinformation and shit that's like the biggest challenge i mean one way
to combat misinformation is be able to uh edit it i thought it was a cancel thing but now that i
know it's about like information yeah but i guess you could go back like if you said some crazy
shit back in the day yeah 12 years old on twitter you can go back just change the words a little bit
like twitter should offer a function that allows you to delete a tweet like twitter should just
beg how long would you like your tweets to exist here yeah a year cool one month cool you want to
delete it every single day cool yeah and um yeah i think that would make it so
giving up mad ip right now yeah i wish twitter had like a like a flag box like hey here's all
the tweets that you should consider deleting you know i mean like if it just had like a keyword
search it's called your drafts i wish there was just like a little thing that's like oh yeah you
said this word back in the day like once we have Twitter for 50 years and we're saying words now,
we're saying trans now, but what if trans is a
slur in 50 years and you don't say trans anymore?
I wish Twitter could update and be like, hey,
you have a bunch of tweets that say trans. Do you want to fix that?
Yeah. And just give you an alert.
Well, you can look up
by the word, but they should do it for you
is what you're saying. You could just have a little inbox.
It's like, yeah, you were wild back then. Flagged tweets.
Yeah. that's great
yeah hey these words are deemed sensitive now they're not uh illegal on our platform but people
find them sensitive you said this back in the day you might have been drunk and forgot yeah just
because it hurts their brand that like they have one such a good search feature that everyone can
look up anything but it also hurts them that oh i could put up something and then in 10 years it
looks crazy and then people kill me i mean low- key like no i just kind of like seeing how people used to win oh yeah like you know you know that's
true but low key like you don't like seeing how you used to while that's a different thing yeah
like i stopped using twitter in terms of like feeding with content i was like the risk is too
high it doesn't help me do anything it doesn't help my career it doesn't sell tickets it doesn't
get people to the podcast but it only hurts me if I say one thing wrong.
So it's not worth it.
So I stopped tweeting.
That's bad for Twitter.
Twitter wants or should want funny people.
But if funny people are scared,
Charlamagne's not on fucking Twitter no more.
He used to be hilarious on Twitter.
So maybe you've removed the funny people
that say things that are dangerous for your platform
and maybe that's what you want.
So maybe that's, I guess, a good thing.
But I think the best platform is where the funniest people are on there.
I mean, we made Twitter pop in when everybody was wiling out on it.
Anyway, what else we got, man?
What are the topics?
Did you see the NCAA finals?
No, I just saw the clip of the guy with the floor.
Yeah, this is kind of wild.
I've never seen this before.
Yeah, this is crazy.
Someone dropped it in the group chat. I'll pull it up. do you want to set it up a little bit uh you want to bust
it yeah so if you didn't watch the ncaa championship it was kansas and unc uh unc was up big at the half
and then kansas came back and won a lot of reasons you could say unc blew it but um one of their star
players got hurt in the game and And Armando Bakot.
I don't know how you say his last name.
Say it again. Armando Bakot.
Say it one more time.
Armando Bakot.
Oh, that's fine. It's British.
You have to pronounce it British.
Armando!
What is that?
Bakot!
I'm Scottish!
Oh, okay. You're Scottish now. Go to the caption can you scroll
up please
alright
let's establish two things
here
one Carolina
wins if Armando Bacchus
doesn't go down
two freedom Carolina wins if Armando Baca doesn't go down to freedom.
All right, this is the clip.
They said the floor moves.
So if you watch the clip, you'll see.
Watch his right foot now.
So.
Rolls his ankle, looks like.
Yeah, so here's my question to you guys.
Do you think the ankle is rolled because of the floor?
I do. I think if the floor moves as you're trying to plant on it how do you stable on that yes it's just moving out of the way how do you roll your ankle you step into a lower surface you know i
mean like you're moving sideways and like you step into a pothole and that's what that is that's a
pothole yeah i i don't know i've i've rolled my angles a bunch like playing ball
that ankle roll right there comes from him rolling his ankle a bunch like it's just a weak tendon or
something i think and i think what happened is he put he had a lot of force going in one direction
tried to plant maybe the floor moving gave you that little i do yeah i mean once you roll your
ankle once it just rolls way more easily it's a crazy thing. But it seems like if you're trying to plant, especially when you're just like one small
part of your body, like the toes or whatever, and then the whole floor moves, your whole
body's going to move in accordance with the floor shifting.
I think...
And that's where you're going to...
You're planted and then all of a sudden...
Yeah.
It's the same way like a corner of a rug moves and you step on it and you slip.
It's kind of like that.
Yeah. No, I'm with you.
I just feel like even if that floor doesn't move, there's a good chance that he rolls his ankle.
Because there's a lot of guys in the NBA you see roll their ankle, and it's not because the floor is moving.
And I also think that the floor moves a lot more than we assume.
You think so?
Yeah, like there's a picture of Zion dunking recently.
The entire floor caves in when he goes to jump.
Did you see the one where
i know that's in an arena this was in a and this was put up there in a stadium for this event so
yeah now they do put up the floor in sections yeah they put up these little like rectangles
of floor and so people go oh they didn't put it in right and it's like dude like the the old garden
in boston yeah you heard they have like dead spots and all that shit. Yeah. But this is also 30 years later or whatever.
100%.
I just think it's very convenient to be like, this is the reason why.
Didn't he roll his ankle earlier as well?
Oh, is that true?
Yeah.
Well, if he rolled it earlier as well, then that's exactly what I said.
Something.
A knee injury or something.
He was playing with like a bad knee or something like that.
Yeah.
I think he tore his meniscus and then came back in the,
or like came back for the next game,
like went crazy.
How many points did he score in that game?
He tore his meniscus
and then did 15 points, 15 rebounds,
I think, or something crazy.
Wow.
And then was like going up
for like this final drive
and then boom.
Now it's still on.
Now again,
I actually didn't get to watch the game,
but it's on UNC for blowing a 15 point lead get to watch the game but uh it's on unc for
blowing a 15 point lead or whatever at the half that's on you in college it happens all the time
because they're not as good as pros but it's still you take the blame for that loss but if
you're that player aren't you pissed yeah 100 i mean could you sue theoretically i wonder like
you might be able to sue for damages in terms of like physical damages. Yeah.
And how it could affect your career.
Yeah.
Yeah. Like in terms of like you're in Walmart,
you slip and fall because something's wet.
You can sue.
Or they might sign some crazy NDA,
which says like,
if you're injured while playing,
yeah,
this is something that happens as part of the game.
And what happens if Shaq got injured when he pulled down the hoop?
I guarantee they all sign something that goes,
that removes all liability from the venue.
Like a waiver?
Like if you went snowboarding,
you know, when you get the lift ticket.
But now, what if you slip
and it's because old boy didn't wipe down the court?
You know what I mean?
Because then it's like you have someone
that actually has to dry it off.
There's negligence.
Yeah, but it's like sweat is constantly dropping.
Yeah, I think it's part of the game.
It still happened the moment he passed.
If I was the NCAA, wouldn't you make everybody sign?
Yeah.
It's just tougher.
You feel more bad for them because pros get paid
and they just now started to be able to get paid in his last year.
But now he can get an ace bandage deal.
He can get some sort of sponsorship 100%.
Just for facts, he got injured on the meniscus.
He rolled his ankle twice.
This is on.
Literally what I said is it.
That ankle was ready to go.
It was in the final minute.
He planted hard.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Also, did you see the arena that they played in?
No, it was fun.
I'm trying to find an actual picture.
It's not an arena.
It's a stadium.
They played in a stadium.
Yeah.
They do that in Syracuse.
Yeah.
Well, they did it for the All-Star game in Dallas.
They played at the Cowboy Stadium.
Basketball arena typically can't accommodate that size of people. Yeah. A, they did it for the All-Star Game in Dallas. They played at the Cowboy Stadium. Because a basketball arena typically can't accommodate that size of people.
Yeah.
A football stadium can.
Yo, the craziest game I've ever seen?
The aircraft carrier.
Oh, that's so fire.
So cool.
What is that like?
They set up a...
West Point?
Oh, I thought it was in San Diego.
No, I forgot.
It's like a military school they played, right?
Oh, is that where the Olympic squad is trained?
No, they do one every year where they play the Army-Navy game or something like that
on an aircraft carrier.
I thought maybe
the Olympic team had been training there or some shit.
Shit, they might have.
But they set up an actual court
on the aircraft carrier.
Look, look, look.
Yeah.
So they're outside.
Oh, that's fire. Isn isn't that cool i've never seen
that before that's fire yeah now it probably throws you off shooting because you know how
when you shoot with nothing in your background your depth perception is all off yeah so but i
just think that's a street ball at that point yeah they're just hooping yeah that'd be fire
the nba you know how the nhl does the outdoor the winter classic where they play outdoors yeah
nba gotta do that right because you need something you need something so also we
were when we were at radio city they they played a wmba game in radio city really they set the
stage is big enough where they could set up the whole full court and then people just watched it
from one side wow that's pretty sick yeah that's interesting right yeah but i like that idea like go ahead with all
the empty seats i know it's half full but it's still probably a little too much still yeah
i mean that's crazy but yeah there is something about college sports like seeing
college players play at the very end like i don't know i was trying to talk to derrick
poston about this but like you see them like they don't this is their only shot you know i mean like nba doesn't carry the same stakes
matter of fact in the nba it's like i can't get injured yeah yeah because i lose out so much
money so let me hold off a little bit exactly but these guys are grinding like i might not
make it to the league this is my last chance like i'm a senior i want to win this is it like those
college basketball tiers like hit different than any other sport.
Yeah, that's true.
That was my high school football tiers.
Put it all out.
Stop it with this high school football.
What did you do?
What were you doing?
Yeah, what happened?
My greatest claim to fame, I have an open field tackle.
What did he say?
He looked like the water boy.
Thanks.
Looks like a water bed, bro.
I made a tackle so surprising.
It was a DB.
It was a homecoming game.
2,000, 2,500 people.
Open field tackle on a 250 pound uh running back tackled him sobbed stars i'm at the bottom of a pile
and a guy on my team was like who's that is that dumb wow and then yanked me up from my pads that
guy wouldn't play d1 really yeah there we go so that was that was your moment that was my moment
that was my college yeah high school put it up after that for high school football wait do we have video of
this please someone's dad has that you get that video and what was the game it was beverly hills
high my side against culver city and like we didn't know which team you were playing for Englewood versus Beverly Hills High
wonder where Dove went
alright guys we're gonna take a break for a second
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code flagrant go get it now let's get back to the show yeah let's see if we can find it what year
2000 uh 2000 um okay so this is something that's very important
that we have to discuss.
I want to bring this up with the utmost
seriousness.
This is
real shit.
Two things have happened
racially this week
that we need to discuss.
Good things or no?
Not really good things. know it one is apparently blm is having uh making some uh interesting like purchases with the money that that they've made. Get your coin, sis. Get your coin.
Now,
also,
a majority white reggae group
won the best
reggae Grammy.
That's a fair trade.
Is it?
I think that's
a fair trade.
Are we eating?
I think we both
just looked the other way.
All right,
can we disagree on that?
Isn't that kind of
white people get reggae, black people get a place in, you know. They we just agree on that? Isn't that kind of. I think. White people get reggae.
Yep.
Black people get a place in.
Yeah.
They get to go to Dove's high school.
Exactly.
Yes or no?
I think that's fair.
Equal theft.
Right?
You know what I mean?
Is it theft if the money was given?
So here's.
I'm trying to think about the Black Lives Matter thing.
Right?
They're like.
They say.
Hey.
Give the money to the organization.
They don't really clearly say what they're going to do to the money yeah right they're like this is for black lives mattering yeah as long as there's black people living in the house yeah
that's true right i didn't say how many black lives mattered yeah you know eight eight eight
black people living in the house that's six million dollars i know woke people they're all
gonna marry white people but half of the house will be black that's not enough if they're
married if they're doing the aoc shit uh-huh right yeah and they're marrying a white person
even though they're like we gotta fight for people of color or whatever um even though you're trying
to eliminate color from your gene pool yeah yeah but if she's doing that um but then i think it's
absolutely wrong but don't you think black lives
matter should be like yo y'all gave us the money this is how we want to spend it i just wish they
would put that the mission statement you know i mean yeah we're trying to black people need some
lit ass houses too yeah this is redlining this is reparations for redlining that put that in the
mission statement boom we're gonna buy expensive property that we didn't have access to. This is part
of Black Lives Mattering. Hello?
I'm buying $10 million worth of real estate
for me, black person.
And it can only be rented or sold
in the future to another black person.
Black lining. Black lining.
Black lining.
We can't get some real estate.
No, but wouldn't that be... I would just lean in i bet yeah we're buying real estate we should have been able to do this years ago but y'all didn't let us
now you upset that we are al i'm wrong here yes yeah talk to me talk to me nah come on she's just
using her money wrong and yeah it just feels it should have been transparent it just feels
weird when you see a non-profit yeah make nonprofit using donations to buy luxurious and extravagant,
like, superfluous things.
Yeah.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Same energy, sir.
Way better.
Joel Osteen.
What about Joel Osteen, son?
Motherfuckers making people go to heaven.
You got to keep the same energy, though.
Like, if you're coming at this girl for buying a mansion, you got to go at Joel Osteen for
Talk that shit.
I'm just saying, right?
I know you hate them Christians. Talk that shit. I was wondering that shit i'm like yo you're coming at your boy right now
i'm tripping right now you know what i'm saying you're the seas out here
you detected animosity right i was like yo mark what's this animosity about joel osteen
this is all some catholic shit you know yeah catholics no but it's like you
take all this money and then you buy all these private jets and you have this giant church and
like you're teaching prosperity gospel like oh if you give me money god will give you money back 10
times oh because it's like oh if but at least he's being honest you give me money you're just mad
because christian Christianity slaps more than Catholic. I mean, that shit does slap more. I don't got no bad shit.
That shit does slap more.
You know what you are?
You're the old head that's like, the kids don't know music these days.
These rappers, these mumble rappers, yo, respect mumble Christianity.
That's that Joe Austin shit is mumble Christianity.
It is popping right now.
The mumble gospel hit.
The Vatican don't look cheap, dog.
The Vatican don't look cheap, dog. Hey,
yo.
The Vatican don't look cheap.
You're a real estate home.
That's not one dude.
That's a bunch of dudes.
How many dudes?
It's the world.
It belongs to the universe.
No,
it don't.
What you mean?
No,
I can't move it.
That shit look like it belongs to the Vatican.
I don't get a piece of that.
You can pull up.
Italy don't get a piece of that.
You can't even pay their taxes,
dog.
You can go see it.
Go check it out. They're tax evaders. Yeah, you can see it. You can go see Joel O don't get a piece of that. You can't even pay their taxes, dog. You can go see it. Go check it out.
They're tax evaders.
Yeah.
You can see it.
You can go see Joel Osteen's church, too.
Pop corn.
You know what I'm saying?
You can do that.
But where's the Pope flying to?
He's not going on a trip to Cancun's?
The Pope is flying.
The Pope got his own mobile.
Yeah, but he's doing it for appearances and trying to save people.
What the fuck you think Joel Osteen doing, man?
He's trying to go down there and hook up with chicks.
Joel Ossetine does not hook up with chicks.
The Pope is hooking up with little boys.
No, he's not.
Don't say that.
No, he's not.
Don't say that.
Don't say that.
Maybe not Pope Francis, but a lot of these priests.
I'm just saying, if we want to bring...
Gandhi.
If we want to talk about it.
Talk that shit.
If we want to talk about it.
How dare you?
If we want to talk about it. Talk that shit. If we want to talk about it. How dare you. If we want to talk about it.
Let's talk about it.
I'll just say Gandhi would like to take some naps with the boys and girls.
No, not boys.
Well, it's girls.
Sure, girls.
Okay, so he'd like to take some naps with the girls.
With the young girls.
Is it Cosby or Gandhi, bro?
What's wrong with that?
I'm just saying.
He likes the sleepy women.
He likes the sleepy women.
He likes the sleepy women.
He napped with them.
Say again?
He napped with them.
Cosby was awake the whole time.
Gandhi said, hey, let's just take a little nap.
How you know he would nap with them, bro?
How you know that?
How you know he didn't have them little Harry Potter glasses on?
He was checking out little young box.
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I mean?
How do you know that?
Gandhi got married when he was 13.
What's 13 really?
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. What?
When Gandhi got married, he was 13.
His wife was 11.
How old was the girl?
His wife was 11.
That's just how things were back then.
So that's wild.
13 is the old.
B, that's wild, bro.
13 is the old 18.
No, but that's just what it was, though.
That's what it was.
Nah, but 11 and 13, that's puberty and that's pre-pubescent.
That's crazy, bro. Yeah, that might be true. That's crazyberty and that's pre-bubescent. That's crazy, bro.
Yeah, that might be true.
That's crazy.
You don't know.
She's a woman.
You don't know when she got her first period.
That's when you got married.
What do you mean not 11?
They didn't even have GMOs back then.
No, but they got curry.
Girls was having spicy food.
Spicy makes it drop.
Yeah, speeds up the whole cycle.
Does it?
You know how your sinuses run more?
That's what happens to your ovaries?
Yeah.
Holy shit. Everything's flowing. Get out of here, bro. Yeah, it speeds up the whole cycle. Does it? You know how your sinuses run more? That's what happens to your ovaries? Yeah. Holy shit.
Everything's flowing.
Get out of here, bro.
Yeah, dude.
So I just need to give my girl some lentil to get that shit to drop?
Give her a little doll?
Give her a little doll and she's good to go?
I'm just saying, if we're going to come at the Christians like you were saying, what
type of Christians are they called?
Nandi noms?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Catholics?
No, no.
You're Catholics. It's the Christians that have the big Non-denoms? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no. You're Catholics.
It's the Christians that have the big churches.
Evangelical?
Evangelicals.
Non-denominational, you know what I'm saying?
I like how you kind of take away their denominations.
We want the smoke, bro.
What is that shit that the Catholics put around us?
Incense.
It's incense.
No, it's not incense. That's the body of Christ. No, no. What is it? That the Catholics put around them? Incense. It's incense. No, it's not incense.
That's the body of Christ.
No, no.
What is it?
That's the air of Christ.
When they're swinging that thing.
Yeah, and the smoke's coming out.
The hookah.
Incense.
Nah, that's hookah.
That's Catholic hookah.
Incense is a small thin stick.
If you do it any different, it ain't incense.
And you buy it 125th.
They don't got that shit at the Vatican.
But it's incense.
It's not incense
I think it's Catholic hookah
it's hookah bro
it's hookah
and it's the symbol
of the prayer
of the faithful
rising to heaven
and that shit smells awesome
it does smell awesome
it's godly bro
it's godly
what does your shit
smell like
India
tradition
smells like tradition
smells like India
come on bro
you didn't even say it
that shit felt offensive.
I was asking a question.
It's called a thurible.
What's a thurible? Incense come from India.
Look at that. Look at that.
Incense are Indian.
Wait a minute.
Akash make an interesting point here.
Incense are Indian.
He's saying incense are Indian.
Fuck outta here, bro.
Fuck outta here. That's just what it is. Fuck outta here, bro. Fuck outta here. What does that mean? Fuck outta here, bro.
Fuck outta here.
That's just what it is.
Fuck outta here.
You got no knowledge at all.
You know what?
You just said fuck outta here
because you know you're wrong.
Yeah, yeah.
I was.
Yo, that's a great point, actually.
That's it.
Yo, you're super dumb, bro.
That's a good-ass point.
That's it.
Next.
You don't know nothing, Al.
Damn.
You're a cultural appropriator every time you light the incense. We made it pop, bro. You don't know nothing, Al. You're a cultural appropriator
every time you like the incense.
We made it pop, bro.
You made it pop.
We made it pop.
You made it pop
with your little 11%
of the population.
You made it pop.
Yo, Black Lives Matter, bro.
Chill.
They do.
There's not that many of them.
Buy an Alamansion.
That's what we got to do.
You're tough.
Why don't you get your piece?
Yeah.
I should hit Shorty up.
Hit her up.
Get one acre.
You don't got to get four
to get one. How much should you give to Black Lives Matter? Do black people have to donate get one acre you don't gotta get four to get one how much
should you give to black lives matter do black people have to donate to that i don't think they
do i don't think they do that's for everyone else they get dividends they what they get dividends
oh it's like uh native americans or whatever and with the casino this is your casino
nah we don't i i didn't give them my cash app that's fucked up why do black people not have
casinos or Venmo?
That's a good thing.
You know,
the cash out thing is way better.
Nah,
Rodney Rich put that shit on one song and everyone's like,
yeah,
we'll get cash.
Yeah.
It's fine.
It was totally just that.
Rodney Rich changed the money exchange system.
Yeah,
dude.
God,
fuck his Venmo.
Now y'all need casinos though.
Black casinos would be fire,
bro.
Oh,
it would be,
would be. Y'all need casinos, dude. Black casinos would be fire, bro. Oh, it would be. Would be.
Y'all need casinos, dude.
It's just going to be all C-logic.
You just need one corner to throw dice at.
Yeah, that's it.
Just a wall.
Yeah.
We got that already.
It's called a street.
Yeah.
Okay.
This is good.
Not guts.
While in and out, they would play guts, and people would lose and win crazy amounts of
money.
What's guts?
Some southern shit, I guess.
I don't know.
I thought it was a black person card game. You don't know shit, bro. Guts, dude. They would lose and win crazy amounts of money what's guts some southern shit i guess i don't know i thought it was a black person card game shit guts dude they would lose thousands of
leonard oots lost thousands of dollars playing guts in one sitting it was crazy he didn't lose
guts all right so the biggest hack maybe in in youtube history i've ever seen happened tuesday
basically channels lil nas x's channel, Eminem's channel,
Drake's channel, Taylor Swift's channel, Ariana Grande's
channel, Harry Styles' channel, The Weeknd, Michael
Jackson, Kanye West, and like
a bunch of other Vivo channels were all
hacked, and the same video was posted
on all of them. I don't think that's the biggest hack ever
on YouTube. Comedy Central has an entire YouTube
channel. We're talking about hacks on
YouTube. So this is the video.
This is literally like the whole shit. And this was just posted just on all these channels all at the same time
that's so fire
i hope the song slaps i'm excited
oh from spain I hope the song slaps. I'm excited.
Oh, from Spain.
Really?
What's going on? This is making me feel weird bro it's funny okay that's the whole video can i tell you the only thing that bothers me about this what i
think i got hypnotized yeah they did it to be like weird and funny and just like that's what hackers do they just cause mayhem this is a real
marketing opportunity you could have put any fire video up there what would you put everybody
son a clip of my stand-up probably oh bring back a poo bring back a poo that'd be fire
you know you would put your clip up oh my god there's a real marketing how do they get into
all of them that's what i'm curious about. Does Vivo have some back channel?
I have a theory.
Miles, I cannot fucking wait to shit all over whatever you say.
He killed the Andy Milonakis one.
He's one up.
He murdered that.
All right, you're plus one, dog.
He said I have a theory to lower the expectations.
You'll notice.
Yeah, you taught me that last week.
He learned.
Go.
I have a theory that all of the passwords were roughly the same,
and then they used a different word at the back end of the password.
So all the front ends of the password were, let's say, password,
a set of numbers,
and then the back end was probably something to do with the artist.
Yeah, the artist.
If it was Taylor Swift, it's Taylor Swift.
So someone found the first one and went,
there's no chance it's the same way.
And then once you have two, you have 50 theory al is shaking his head i think vivo is a manager on all of these accounts and so once you get vivo's password you have all their i i that's
kind of what i think right it's like uh because the managing account has access to all the accounts
below it that is rough for you. Yeah, that was very good.
That is rough for you.
But see how much better it is when you just go, I have a theory?
Now we can't shit all over you like we used to.
No, I think we should.
You think we should?
I mean, yours was so complex and like fucking mastermind thing.
And then Al was like, hey, buddy, how about they're just the manager?
What's crazy is that he uploads to YouTube.
I know.
And he's a manager at all these accounts.
I know.
How would you get that one?
So did you really think, for example,
that in order for Vivo to protect their artists
and their platforms and their pages,
they would simply just use the password, password,
and then the artist's name?
No, that was just an example.
But I was saying there's some keyword at the front
and then the artist's name at the back. was just an example, but I was saying there's some keyword at the front and then the artist's name at the back.
And you don't think the artist would go,
huh, mine is blah, blah, blah, my name.
I wonder if other people's is the same thing, their name.
Maybe it was an artist that did it.
Oh, shit.
So Vivo is owned, not by YouTube,
but the three big...
A lot of
a lot of animosity
coming this way
record companies
it's owned by Warner
Universal
and Sony Music
again watch this
so someone
someone got hacked
over there
that's key to all this
but it didn't come
through YouTube
it came through Vivo
which is from the record labels
and maybe those
artists are all
from one of those
if you could hack any page
what would you hack
Hezbollah Freed Palestine Hezbollah oh my god labels and maybe those artists are all from if you could hack any page what would you hack has below
students for justice of palestine
yeah barrett posen was at i was about to say his school now he just lives
on ut and there was a israel palestine protest going on and he was just standing in the middle
of it and there was like one size like pro palestine one side bro is that what did he facetime you or he just sent you a video he sent
a video and was like i don't know who to choose and i was like you sure you want to come to new
york spirit airlines three stops you'll get here don't worry um what else we got marquito all right
trans people in palm springs are getting paid for being trans. Yeah, I saw this.
That's the word.
That's the headline.
Now, what, what, what, what?
Is there any checklist?
You're like, you got a, like, checkpoint where you got to be trans enough, you got to prove
it somehow, or you just say, I'm trans and you get some money.
That's a good point, because trans isn't Operation Trans.
So, you know what I mean?
What you feel inside.
Yeah, what you believe despite what you were assigned at birth.
Do you have to put it on your license at least?
And how much
do you get? Because apparently they've allocated $200,000
total for this.
How many trans are there in Palm Springs?
Twelve.
Let's be real about this.
There might be a lot.
It's a huge gay community.
You understand they're not the same.
They might like each other.
They might hang out together, you know?
The LGBTQ pluses.
Yeah.
They hang out together.
They're making the same person.
Yeah, but if they're all going to be in one area.
We all hang out together, but Al still took our money for Black Lives Matter.
That's a good point.
That's a good ass point, actually.
Thank you.
But no, apparently what they're doing is they're trying to test out this universal basic income
concept where they're going to basically allocate $ a thousand dollars a month to different people.
And they're like, OK, well, what group should we do it to?
And they're like, well, it seems like trans people would be a small enough group that it's not going to like bankrupt us for the experiment.
Palm Springs and you choose trans.
Let's start with black.
It's probably like two.
Yeah, that's a good point.
Yeah.
But they basically they're doing a control group jump in the ladder they have 20 trans people that they're doing the
experiment with and then there's 20 trans people that they're not doing the experiment with they
all have to be below the poverty threshold and uh they're basically just doing like a control
group that's on like social security like assisted living and then the other group that's on universal
basic income see what happens in six months so i'm actually kind of like all right that's kind of an interesting experiment
you know i just realized this is i'm sorry go go i want you go you go you go no i'm just like
really fascinated by this so what is the idea like that we're just going to give everybody
using universal basic income that is just what life is going to be i think we're getting there
as ai takes more and more jobs i think we're going to have to go but it's interesting because
the mayor of the town is a trans woman.
And they asked her and they were like, yo, what do you think we should do about this program?
And she was like, nah, universal basic income is not the move.
We should not go forward with universal basic income.
Oh, so they were trying to get her in on it by saying we'll give it to the trans community first.
Now she looks like a doofus?
What was that?
Now she looks like a dummy. Now she looks like a dummy not taking care of her people this is a brilliant political move
they want to push out this universal basic income thing right they're trying out a small community
they have a trans mayor the trans mayor has the whole trans community out there supporting her
so they go we're going to give it to the trans community first all the people in the trans
community right yo this is lit a free thousand that's fire i want that below the poverty
threshold allegedly according to the article
okay what's the poverty threshold in palm springs 800 000 yeah probably maybe super high but now
she's got all this pressure to do it because it's taking care of her constituents but like
specifically the community supporting her so now she got to say no to the people that are in her
community especially the poor people that oh this is smart politics she says she doesn't believe in uh she doesn't believe in universal basic income that's an
interesting political move right there that's that chess shit that's that chess shit we gotta get good
at if we're running for president yeah no you're right like we gotta learn how to do this shit
they manipulated this bitch into doing something she didn't want to do by getting all the people
that vote for her to be into it game of of Thrones shit. That's Tyrion shit.
Yeah.
Brilliant.
Brilliant.
While we're talking about trans,
I think it's very important
that we talk to our good friend, Jake.
We love this guy.
He's absolutely amazing.
You guys will relive the experience
from the beginning
and in many other parts.
And he's something that we really admire.
He is probably, you know,
the most entertaining informational YouTube page
on the planet.
The best entertainment I've ever seen.
Yeah.
He would win Tech Window every single year.
He would be the gold medalist.
Tech champion.
Tech champion.
If that was a thing at all.
If it was, which it could be.
Never would have been.
Yeah, without further ado, Jake Fran, everybody.
Now, you aren't in your videos that much in terms of FaceTime.
Yeah.
Which I respect.
Yeah, there's a very specific reason for that.
So when I was coming up with the strategy for my channel,
I really liked channels where you did see their face
because you built a very deep personal connection
with that person.
But I also didn't like it
because visuals like graphics and B-roll and animations are a lot more interesting to watch than just a talking head.
So I wanted the best of both worlds where the majority of the video is B
roll.
And then I usually show up at the end.
So you still get the interesting visuals that keeps you engaged,
keeps the watch time.
But you also built that personal connection to where now people still
recognize me like on the street and whatnot,
even though I'm barely in the videos.
Yeah, and it's the most diehards
that get to the end anyway.
Exactly.
And it's a lot more scalable too.
Yes.
Yes.
That's right,
because you just have to record shorter amounts of time.
Yes.
You can do audio for the rest of it.
Yep, I don't have to worry about lighting or cameras
or a bunch of other equipment.
I literally just have my laptop and a mic.
So this is why you can travel all around the world and doing all this fun shit how much youtube hacking did you
do before you started doing the videos youtube hacking like learning how to work youtube learning
the algorithm like learning what was successful what worked thumbnails all this stuff like so
i grew up watching youtube so you're a YouTube kid. Yes. Main form of entertainment. Uh, partially
because my parents couldn't afford cable. That's what they told you, bro. They just wanted you to
be great. Yeah. Fair enough. Fair enough. Thanks mom and dad. Yeah. Yeah. So it was my main form
of entertainment growing up. So I kind of like, you know, I was a customer for so long,
so I kind of intuitively know, knew what I liked and didn't like on YouTube.
Yeah. And, uh, in high school I started watching a lot of tech channels like Marques Brownlee,
Linus Tech Tips. And I just got really sold on the idea of being a YouTuber,
like that romanticized ideal, like having sponsors, getting free stuff, having fun on camera,
et cetera. So at the time I was doingwondo. I was a competitor and coach.
And I did Taekwondo for like five years.
What's Taekwondo for us old people?
Taekwondo?
Yeah.
The Korean martial art.
Oh, Taekwondo, dude.
I thought you said Taekwondo.
Taekwondo.
Dude, he said, you were just saying.
Christ, dude.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Relax, dude. Relax.. Jesus Christ, dude. Hold on. Jesus Christ. Relax, dude.
Holy fuck, man.
Relax.
God damn it, dude.
You just said.
What a fucking idiot you are.
Jesus Christ.
How dumb are you, dog?
He just said he watched a lot.
Really?
Really trying to be like Charlie Rose or something?
I educate those folks who'd be more ignorant.
What's that window?
Listen, listen.
You just said
you watched a lot of...
Y'all have made it worse.
You know that, right?
What y'all do is way more disrespectful.
What y'all do is way more disrespectful. I made it worse. You know that, right? What y'all do is way more disrespectful. What y'all do is way more disrespectful.
I made it imminently.
I made it imminently for a mistake.
You got to give it a documentary.
Go give it a documentary now.
Oh, my God.
He said he watched a lot of tech YouTube.
Marquise Brownlee.
And then he said he started working for Tech Window.
He was studying for Tech Window. And I thought Tech Window. He was studying for Tech Window
and I thought Tech Window...
He said he competed.
And he was competing.
This also has a competitive portion of it.
And he was coaching.
Honestly, I thought that shit was like UFC
but for computers, dog.
What made you sound older than not hearing him talk?
He didn't say it to my career.
He pronounced Taekwondo wrong. He did. He didn't say it to my good ear. He pronounced Taekwondo wrong.
He did.
He did.
That's Korean Taekwondo, isn't it?
See? He don't know how to speak Korean.
Oh my god.
What? That was good.
You did good on that one.
Say Taekwondo.
Now say Taekwondo
Taekwondo
Thank you
Thank you
It sounds like taekwondo
Man shut the fuck up
I was in the clear fam
I was in the clear
And then y'all just brought it right back
I was the only one that was confused
Y'all heard what y'all heard?
Everybody else was so fucking embarrassed
Why?
Because I'm hearing his trash.
That's when I was really embarrassed for you.
I only heard a single fucking thing.
You still think about Tamagotchis, this guy.
Okay, Miles, what did you doodle over there?
Did you write your note Taekwondo or did you write Taekwondo?
Nobody heard Taekwondo.
It doesn't even mean anything.
Yo, say them both again.
Tech Window.
Tech Window.
Taekwondo.
Yeah, that's different.
You can hear Ty very freely.
Y'all are cap right now, yo.
Nah, you're crazy, bro.
Y'all are all cap.
It's, yeah, it's close, dude.
It's close.
Shut up.
You can't hear him exactly, but I think it's close.
It's close.
Did anybody think he said Tech Window? No. You can't hear him exactly, but I think it's close. It's close.
Did anybody think he said Tech Window?
Nobody thought that shit ever in life.
Tech Window is a very popular computer competition.
And you could coach, you could compete.
It's like tough.
You know the Ultimate Fighter? This motherfucker started thinking about Mac with PCs.
Son, I thought it was a YouTube channel windows no more nobody
even on windows no more I don't know okay I don't know I now you thought the same shit. Thank you. This motherfucker's all cap, bro.
This motherfucker is a straight up liar, bro.
This guy's a straight up liar. He laughed as soon as you said it.
He really did, bro.
Run the tape back.
He laughed at you as soon as you said it.
No, he didn't.
Because you sounded like a fucking dummy, dog.
No, no, no, no, no.
Don't do this.
Don't do this.
Don't do this to me.
I cannot believe y'all are acting like
he's not saying the same fucking thing twice, right?
Say it again, please.
Taekwondo.
Taekwondo.
Taekwondo.
Say it again.
Taekwondo.
Taekwondo.
That's a little bit more.
You went a little bit more Thai on that.
You didn't go as Thai on that as you did before.
Mark. Mark. Mark is so embarrassed by you, dog.
Someone Google Tech Window and see if they have a goddamn competition or something like that.
Bring up Tech Window.
I swear to God it's a fucking competition platform slash coaching apparatus. Okay, so you started Tech Window Channel where you would do Tech Window. I swear to God, it's a fucking competition platform slash coaching apparatus.
Okay, so you started Tech Window channel where you would do Tech Window.
Yes.
Okay.
And okay.
Okay, Jake.
Okay, Jake.
Okay, Jake.
Okay, go.
And I grew up to like 5K subs in one or two years, which is pretty bad.
And you were just doing Tech Window?
Yeah, just Tech Window.
And then like actual moves or like you were teaching people tech window like what was
tutorials on tech window yes yes you know jacob fucked you up yo no i believe it and i've seen
him do splits too balls to the floor dog that's what i'm talking about okay um okay so you grow your channel the tech window channel to 5 000 subs right and then
and then you go that window is closed like that yeah yeah
wasn't making any progress, so I gave up.
Okay.
And I went the traditional route.
Well, that's progress 5,000 followers for tech windows?
Yeah, that's impressive.
That's unbelievable.
Yeah, did not know what I was doing.
Okay.
So I took a break, went the traditional route of like going to college for computer science,
became a web developer, dropped out.
And then once I got like the job,
I thought I really,
really,
really wanted.
It was a remote web development job at 20 years old,
19 years old,
making like pretty decent money.
What were you making?
What were you making?
So if I worked for,
it was $40 an hour.
So I've worked full time.
That would have been like 80 K a year at 20.
Good money.
Yeah.
Good money.
Then I got bored within
like a few months of course you did yeah so i went back into youtube and a few months in i decided to
like go all in and just quit my job when i was making zero zero money on youtube i was living
with my parents at the time so i didn't have any bills to pay yes yeah and that's more culturally
acceptable right yeah yeah okay yes definitely not like
white people yeah we're losers if we do that shit you guys are family people yeah
it's so it's true it's true yeah yeah because i live with my parents i was like 30 years old
okay yeah because i like you was following my dream okay family family man i'm a family man
took care of them yeah you know
what i mean protecting them you did yeah yeah yeah so it took me like another year of struggling on
youtube yeah until i came until i realized like i had to do something different which is when i
came up with this strategy what were you doing in that year yeah so i was making like talking
head videos just me in front of the camera explaining stuff like only fan a little different it was clothed right was it educational still or was it okay yeah and at the
time i was watching i was basically copying the youtube as i watched like graham stuff in yeah
content yeah so i wasn't growing because i was copying him and uh you just like can't grow when
you copy other people because there's a better version of it that exists.
I've been doing all right.
I've been copying this guy for a long time.
Yeah, so I imagine YouTube as any other business
where you have to innovate.
You have to provide some sort of content
that isn't being provided to the marketplace already.
And the way I personally went about doing that
is I read a book called Blue Ocean Strategy,
where it teaches you how to go into any crowded marketplace where there's a lot of competition.
That's a red ocean, like there's blood in the ocean of people like fighting over food.
Yeah.
And you go into any red ocean and you do the stuff the book talks about and you come up with your own little blue ocean,
like a unique niche where you have zero competition.
A white space, we call it.
Okay, nice. Yeah, no competition. ocean like a unique niche where you have zero competition a white space we call it okay nice
yeah no competition so it's like growth is super super easy because no like customers have no one
else to go to besides you yeah that's brilliant so no one else was doing these these video essays
or you were doing it in a way yeah yeah i'll explain so uh basically the elevator pitch for
my channel is uh i run one of the
biggest channels for documentaries on money power and crime so no one else really does that and the
way i came up with that is i looked at the different niches on youtube i liked like the uh
the personal finance investing personal development niche where people are just talking on camera
the what i call the edutainment niche where it's like
b-roll and voiceover like went over productions yeah in a nutshell chris kazot poly matter those
type of channels yeah and then there was also this other niche called video essays where people broke
down movies like why the joker is the greatest villain i've seen these yeah yeah yeah these movie
clips and everything yeah so those were the three niches I really liked. And what the book Blue Ocean Strategy talks about
is you look at your competitors,
you list out all the attributes
that make up like their products.
In this case, it's a video.
So like the length of the video,
how entertaining is it?
How much selling do they do in the video?
How much of a personal connection you have
with the creator, et cetera.
And I basically took the stuff that I liked,
removed the stuff that I didn't like like changed some stuff that i didn't like and added other stuff
that people never thought about and the result i still have like a picture of this little sketch
that i made of the strategy the result was kind of the channel i have today really really no no
one really competing with me there's actually copycats now but yeah when you
have no competition everyone has to flock to you when i when i started doing with stuff with stand
up online yeah it all came from outside of stand exactly it was it was music it was all these other
people that were having success exactly and i was even vloggers and i was like okay we can't apply
the same stand-up rules to this we have to see what everybody else is doing and then try to get inspiration
from that.
That makes total sense.
That's interesting.
One of the easiest ways to innovate in business is to just look at other
industries.
Other industries.
Yeah.
Or other fields.
It doesn't have to be like business industries.
What is the subscriber goal?
The subscriber goal,
you know,
for the longest time it was a million subs.
And now?
Yeah.
Now it's like almost like a million and 10,000 or something.
So now you got a new goal, Jake.
Yes.
So actually, you know, when I hit a million subs, like almost immediately I felt like
this like emptiness and not having something to strive for because that was the goal for
so long.
Yeah.
Yeah.
After achievements, oftentimes it's followed by a little bit of sadness or depression yeah yeah that happened like right away it's postpartum yeah
weirdly so yeah for the longest goal for the longest time the goal was shit huh men ain't
shit women have postpartum when they have a fucking child and we're like hold on i feel so
empty after the subs on youtube yeah that makes more sense it's like why you sad bitch you got your kid sure you got your millie bitch say what why you sad you got your millie
bitch because i need to have another millie to go for i need to have a new thing i gotta
accomplish it i can't do nothing with that millie i gotta go for something else the goal was to get
there i got the goal yeah but you get to play with your human being and you gonna mope around all sad
yo you get your fucking plaque wait till your plaque at least before you get sad you just compare a plaque to a fucking child you did motherfucker what the
fuck is wrong with you you did you got no respect for women's bodies what they go through that's a
given you're a we all know that i don't believe in postpartum all right all right scientology
for men or women both yo you're gonna do a scientology video
that will be fire probably yeah with this will smith shit that'd be the time if if it comes out
that some scientologies were fucked up will smith that'd be a nice time for a video okay what's the
number what's the uh sub number you're going for what's next what's the goal honestly no sub count
um yeah for the longest time the goal was you know
having financial freedom etc a million subs now that i've achieved that i'm left looking for the
next thing which i haven't found yet so you don't know no oh yeah a little bit of serendipity right
now there we go well next time we come back on a podcast we're gonna have to press you on that
you better have a new goal all right i don't need you out here looking all crazy.
All right.
You know, people with no goals, they start smacking people at the Oscars.
Yeah.
That's true.
Don't turn into Will Smith on me, bro.
I'll try my best.
Okay, good.
Wait, but so you're out here on YouTube, you're big on YouTube, and you're getting noticed
in the streets.
How are the ladies treating you?
You know, the majority of my audience is guys, like 98%. How are the ladies treating you? You know, the majority of my audience is guys. Like 98%.
How are the guys treating you?
Everyone I've met on the street has been super, super nice.
For the women, like one or two out of every 10 followers on Instagram is a girl.
If they're cute, I'll like follow back.
I love that game.
That's a fun game.
Is there pressure from the family?
Is there pressure from the family? Is there pressure from the family?
Well, they're Asian, so they would prefer me to have some Vietnamese girl, but I don't
like Asian girls.
Really?
Why not?
Because it's not exotic.
I grew up in the culture.
I'm so bored of it.
Oh, so you want something that looks a little different.
Yes.
I like white girls.
You like who?
White girls.
You like white girls. Be careful, dog. Specifically white girls be careful specifically white girls yeah damn dog be careful got fucking flesh and fit in a building
so uh
come on mark fucking taekwondo superstar come on you're crazy this guy's fucking absurd okay so listen so you just into the white girls
bro yeah really yeah i mean i'm open to like other races but right that's the preference
really and why do you think that is um do like fat milky?
White guys will like Asian girls because it's very exotic. Yeah Jews. Yeah. Yeah
But I grew up in Asian culture, it's not exotic to me like Western culture is like the different thing
Yeah, it's not reactionary because Asian girls usually don like asian guys and you're like nah fuck you first oh i think it's more of
my parents want it so i don't want it uh this is you rebelling yes this is your parents want you
with you can only get purple hair once so how am i gonna disappoint them next time it's like that
was your million subs and now you have to find a new way to this is the new goal you get a white
girl and will they be furious?
Oh, I mean, I've exceeded their expectations by like at least an order of magnitude.
So they can't tell me shit anymore.
Really?
Damn.
Damn, bro.
You go get you a Karen, dog.
That's what I'm talking about, Jake.
But like big girl, you like them big and white? No, no, no.
Like a voluptuous?
No, like a normal size not like super super skinny
yeah but like but like what like a normal was that your show like an asian size white woman
asian like a small petite white woman no i don't like like super super small no you want
you want a full-bodied fat tit like renaissance girl i think uh do you want a renaissance white
like she comes with the beer in the sign i think uh russian girls are the hottest
really he said that too yeah he said when he went to russia he was he was surprised
they are i mean they're really hot yeah i've only paid for sex once in my life
and it was in ukraine which is almost russia now it's a donation to the cause
a hundred percent donation yeah 100 and um but yeah she was super hot she was super it was more
peer pressure because like all the homies were doing it like you know when you meet your boys
you just fucking hookers as a team you know you have to absolutely you can't let your homie fuck
a hooker alone you cannot do that that is weird that's that's weird you gotta do it that is disloyal
yeah you know what i mean so but what i'm trying to say is that you can buy them from out there
yeah you can get yourself a mail order bride oh do a video on that what was that the economics
of mail order bride oh yeah i will get a mail order bride make a video on it write it off as
a business expense there There you go.
There you go.
Smart.
This guy's fucking genius.
This is research purposes.
Yes.
Hells yeah.
Dude, this is great.
Have you ever slept with a Russian girl?
Not yet.
Not yet?
Oh, dude, we need to get you a ruski, man.
When you're out there in Dubai, you didn't meet a couple of them?
I actually met one.
Really?
Nothing happened, though.
Was she pressing you? What was she couple of them? I actually met one. Really? Nothing happened, though. Was she, like, pressing you, or what was she doing?
We met for, like, three minutes, but, like... It don't take that long for it.
But then I left, like, the day after, so...
Ah.
Are you more, like, a relationship guy?
Yeah, yeah.
Really?
Ah, that's like him.
Yeah, don't do that shit, man.
Come on, get over there.
Talk to him, bro. Get get out there you gotta live for me
you know what i mean i just want to live vicariously through you bro purple hair rock star
you know what i mean traveling around the world yeah you gotta be getting your dick suck more yeah
i will be monogamous and faithful for you you fuck holes for me exactly just dick suck
yeah just dick suck all right this year for. I'll do it just for you guys.
Yeah.
Don't do it for you.
What I'm saying is you got your million followers.
Now you have to have a goal with sweet cock sucks.
Okay.
What is it?
What's a good number you think?
Yeah.
What's a good number?
For what?
For sweet cock sucks.
A hundred?
A hundred.
Let's go.
Noble goal. That's what I'm talking about. This got lofty goals? Let's go! Noble gold.
This got lofty gold.
Silver plaque, baby.
Get in the gold.
The white plaque, bro.
Let's do it. Okay, there it is.
A hundred cock sucks this year. Jake Tran has set the goal
and you know when he puts his mind to something,
it's going to happen. The one, the only.
I can't wait for that video.
We can't wait for Mail Order Bride.
What else?
What else?
You were about to say something to the people at home.
Oh, yeah, like single girls just sliding to my DMs.
Yeah.
Let's go, Jake.
Jake is hungry, huh?
Yo, that's what I'm talking about, bro.
You got to hit them splits.
Girls like splits, bro.
No, for real.
Come on, Al.
Al.
Oh, word?
They love splits, man.
They love splits.
They love splits.
Yo, you never bust a split right in front of the girl to start licking that thang?
Damn.
Never once while she's standing?
Wait, wait, wait.
You get right back to the hotel room, bust the split, lick the clit.
That's how you've never done that, Al?
How far of a split can you do?
Say again?
How far of a split can you do?
Let me see a split.
Let me see a split.
What do you got?
Come on, bust it out.
Bust it out.
Yeah, you and Jake got to do a split off right now, bro.
He's about to split that big ball of his right now.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
That's not even a split.
You just took a knee, son. That was a hamstring stretch.
What is that?
That's Colin Kaepernick.
Is the National Anthem playing?
What are you doing?
That's why it was hard for me to support him.
Okay.
I wanted to take his knee, but that shit was difficult.
That's as far as I can go.
Show the ladies.
Show the ladies. Show the ladies what you're at.
Hey, show these girls, bro.
Hey.
Show these girls what they can expect.
Pay attention.
Hey, ladies.
Let's see what the...
Show these ladies.
Every one of y'all right now.
Get a tech window split.
There you go, boys.
Oh, shit.
Give him the pile driver.
It's on.
Jake Tran.
Wow.
You're going to damage some cervix like that, my boy.
If your daughter's in a city where jay trans coming through lock her up bro
it's gonna be dick sucks for days dude real talk i'm scared i'm scared for the girls in
in new york right now to be honest jaws all empty
these girls what are they gonna think when they find it when that video drops right there
when that one it's over, dude. Their jaws
are going to drop. You just fill them up. Real talk.
Right there. Bang.
Could you do it with your leg on the shoulder?
Oh.
Why you got to get all...
Wait, one
leg on one shoulder, one leg on the other shoulder.
And then he's in the
Van Damme. Can you do the Van Damme?
No.
All right.
Why not?
Thumbnail, guys.
We got the thumbnail, I think.
That was a master of the internet.
You meet one user and you're like, guys, I figured it out.
It's on the technical.
We're great at it.
Bro, he can Van Damme the two of you.
You're not going to do it.
Yes, we're going to do it.
Can we finish the podcast first before we do the thumbnail?
Thanks a lot.
Okay, so what you're basically saying right now is ladies at home,
if you're white, got fat milky tits.
Ladies at home, if you're white, you got super fat milky tits.
No geisha.
No geisha.
You got to be purebred.
What did you say?
No geisha.
Oh, I thought you said no gay shit.
Also that too.
I can't hear what Noah's saying no more.
Y'all are fucking with me.
I think everybody's using accents or some shit, right?
I thought it was tech window.
He said that.
Thank you.
He thought it was tech window too, bro.
So when I started to laugh, it's because I realized it wasn't tech window.
Oh, you asked for me.
I was like, you stupid.
I just saw Mark's fucking head slam into the microphone.
I was like, God, Jesus.
Did I say something bad?
Anyway, all you fat-tinted milky whites out there with the porcelain skin.
Okay, the ivory.
Ivory.
If you got the ivory, okay, you got the super fat milkies.
Slim waist, no ass, right? you don't want no ass keep it
real i know i know what time it is right i know bruh just legs into hips and russian ideally if
you speak that zip zip oh if you got the zip zip do you know how to speak zip zip i know uh da
nyet nyet yeah spasiba yeah and then how do you say what's the other one
i can't remember the other one how do you you got to learn how to say i could get this dick suck definitely got it with a question mark at the end though oh yeah uh suka is bitch
billiards that's also a bitch okay yeah and then if you want to say go fuck a goat it's
got it that's a bad one don't say that one that's real i got one here my russian friend told me that And then if you want to say go fuck a goat, it's ya te be a trakhnu kazyo.
Got it.
That's a bad one.
Don't say that one.
That's real. Oh, I got one here.
My Russian friend told me that was a...
What?
Suck my dick.
Suck my dick.
Yeah.
Yo, I know...
I can recognize suck my dick in any language, yo.
Suck my dick is the same in every language.
Y'all know that, right?
Suck my dick. Yeah, that every language y'all know that right sus ma beat yeah that's good french yeah chupa mi pito spanish everything sounds different you
just say but with the same expression it's just got my in it the me no no no it's the way you
say it it don't matter what vietnamese gouck my dick I actually don't know
Cap
Come on bro
He says he only speaks
To talk to his parents
And I don't think
That would come up
Well how do you say suck
How do you say suck
Here we go
Go
Why is a girl saying it That's where it's throwing him off oh really get a dude to say that shit
hit that right now just ask for the dude hit him with it hit him with a little
no you tried to cheat it you tried to fucking honey mustard bro okay let's uh let's listen
for no goddamn reason bro this guy's crazy
come on come on guys let's start the pot we gotta start the podcast
hey everybody at home we love y'all we appreciate appreciate y'all. This is Jake Tram.
Make sure you go check out his YouTube.
Great stuff.
Absolutely love it.
We love you.
We support you.
Keep up the great work.
Okay?
And then we'll see you soon.
God bless.