Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 414 - Somewhere South of Australia

Episode Date: February 1, 2024

The boys are back and this time Jesse has been having some sort of existential week, and of course the cause is ASMR. Meanwhile Crendor has zero geography skills and baskets of too much stuff. And then ladies and gentlemen, are you ready for Papa Nurdle? All this and 70 pounds of cocaine on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://meundies.com/cox for 20% off your first order, plus free shipping.

Today's episode is brought to you by me undies, me undies are the undies that I have on me. Now let's jump into this podcast. Hello everybody, it's time for Ghost on Trend Dog. This is Trend Dog in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. In 4 hour recording studio. Recorded.

Live, live, live, live. In 4-Hour Recording Studios. Recording. Wake your ass up. It's the next Crendo in the morning. Hello, everybody. You're watching another episode of Cacks and Crendo in the morning. Whoa.

Hello? You being strangled? Has Toast finally had enough of you? I get it, Toast. End him. It's fine. I don't know. That's just my I didn't know what to say intro. I think I got post-nasal drip.

Ooh. Yeah. That's not open. Let me ask you a question. I feel like you're not the one to ask this. Yeah. That's not open. Now, why? Let me ask you a question. I feel like you're not the one to ask this. Okay. But why is it called post-nasal drip and not just nasal drip? It's still dripping. It's nasal dripping.

Why is it post-nasal drip? Why is it called post-nasal drip? Because it's still, I mean, the whole point is it's still dripping. It's going backwards, though, right? Like, I mean the whole point is it's still dripping. It's going backwards though, right? Like that's the vibe. So it's still dripping. Yeah, everyone's just saying what it is, but nobody's saying, is it like posterior? What's the definition of posterior? Yeah, because when you say post it seems like after, right? Yeah.

So why is it, but it's happening, it seems like after, right? Yeah. So why is it? But it's happening to you actively. Oh, posterior means further back in position. So like behind. So there you go. Here's the, I get it now. We can't just go around saying posterior nasal drip because it sounds like it's coming out your butt. Yeah, exactly.

Right. Okay. No, that checks out. Right. You don't want people to think your butt yeah exactly right okay no that checks out right you don't want people to think your butt's dripping so you got to say post they all right it checks out i'm here for it we have our answers however a posterior the third definition is a person's buttocks so that's what i'm saying so you don't want to go around saying that my butt's dripping because that sounds weird your drip yeah no it makes sense yeah no it checks out all right question answer see that took a minute see how easy it is news outlets when you just ask a question and look for the answer and find the answer we could have done

a whole podcast about that it took us a minute yeah no there's podcasts out there that would be like posterior versus post nasal drip. Is this some sort of conspiracy run by the aliens? And then there's like, well, I do think the aliens are trying to give us post nasal drip. They're also trying to make our butts leak. I mean, that's true. If the aliens are the ones who are making us say post instead of posterior, honestly, I'm fine with it. It sounds like after, I'm going to say millennia of posterior honestly i'm fine with it it sounds like after i'm gonna say millennia of being more intelligent than us they really are giving us the things we need to succeed i think however i do think the british probably say posterior well the british probably

call it like you got a coco wangle nope that's australian that's australian yeah that's the australia no british it's posterior nasal drip. Because it just sounds like it's more, you know, just sounds more British. I don't know. What's another word for drip? I'm going to source this. Posterior drainage. That's 100% it.

Well, it's called posterior drainage. Instead of drip, maybe drop. You know how it's always a little off, right? Or dribble. Posterior dribble. You know what I mean? Like, it's never drip is too American, right? Right.

It's, you know, there's not enough U's and O's in it for, you know. Meanwhile, in Australia, of course, it's the wing-a-wanga. And then Canada, it's like, oh, yeah, we got the drippy. It's just called the drip. That checks out. Yeah, I mean, no matter where you are, people are dripping. People be dripping out there, that's true actually that's probably true just in general like not even if you're sick people just be dripping it's a thing

no one wants to think about it but people be dripping people do be dripping. People do be dripping. But there's also like somebody's drip, right? Like somebody's cool outfit, right? Their drip. Did I hear you type in the definition of drip? Was that you trying to just do that now? No, that's what I'm pretty sure it is. I was making sure now by typing it in. Right, right.

Yeah, I know. Things change so much. The kids these days. Something or someone is really cool or has so much swag to it yes but the original the original term like drip is just a shortened version of something akin to like they're dripping coolness so you know like like it like drips off of them they're so so cool. Right? And then they got drip. Everything's shortened. Eventually, we're going to call it, they got the dry.

And then people are going to be like, damn, he got the D. In which case, by that point, D will refer to drip, while a penis will be called a winga wenga. I think they already do that in Australia. That's true. Everything in Australia is just a wingawanga. Yeah. Then they got new wingawanga. Old, southwest, north.

Yeah, but if you live in Australia, you can tell because the pronunciation is a little different depending on where you live. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's a very Australian thing. And we know a lot about the Aussies. We know so much very true uh speaking of which we actually had somebody mark down every weather location we've ever done yeah I know I was so blown away by that I cannot stress you to you enough how unnecessary that is but i loved it yes very cool it's uh let's see if you want and i will say because of that we got a ton of people that were messaging me like hey would you take a look at

this place or this place yeah but if they want to do that then they can comment on the youtube damn damn you heard the man comment on the YouTube. Damn. Damn, you heard the man. Comment on the YouTube. That's where I look every time. So if you want your weather request answered, go to the youtube.com slash coxandcrendor podcast of this podcast, and that's where you comment and likely get your weather thing on here. We got one for Zambia. Dude, Zambia?

Zambia. I'm so impressed with our listenership. Looking at that map, it made me realize either one, we've got listeners around the world, or two, some of y'all just like giving us weird places. Which, if you want to see

the thing, I'll put it in the description thing for everybody that's like, I want to see the map. You 100% in the description thing for everybody that's like i want to see the map 100 should yeah i'll do that but yeah now looking around we've never done west australian weather we've done all over yeah we've never been to perth we've never done any of that yeah or nt which one was nt northern territory uh we've never done mongolian weather which kind of blows my mind i feel like we should have especially since you're over here like, oh, male. Like, you got the throat singing down.

Yeah. You've never done Alaskan weather? That seems crazy. Cold, I imagine. Yeah, but I feel like we would have had Alaska at some point. Maybe we don't have Alaska listeners. I don't know. Yeah.

Greenland, we never did. There's like two people in Greenland. Well did iceland but not greenland iceland has people living in it greenland is like a guy and three penguins i'm sure you've got more important things to do like stay alive that's true. Also, there's like... Okay, I don't know if this exists. Okay, well I know it exists, but... Okay, yeah? If you go north of Sweden, there's just some island called Svalbard, and I've never heard of that in my life. Well, how often are you looking at Sweden and then going north? There it is, Svalbard. Like, does anyone live in Svalbard?

Yeah, although Svalbard is not the... What the hell is this place next to it? Zemlya? Zemlya? Zemlya? I can't. I don't speak Russian. Zemlya.

It's another place. It appears to be more north. Although, if you're still in Greenland, no, that's nothing. That literally has no name. It's just land with no name. Which one? If you're in Greenland and you go up all the way, there's no names at all. Zemla's east of the place you were talking about.

Voldemort or whatever. Oh, yeah, I see. Station Nord. There could be anything up here. This is crazy. Actually, that landmass kind of looks like an organ, like a kidney. See it? I mean, I do.

Yes, I do. That's pretty neat. Anyway, what did you do this week? This week, I was going through doing like taxi things and trying to like, you know, answer all the emails I have that are mixed in with all the spam that I have. And sometimes the ADHD takes over and I just, you know what? Not today. I just walk away and I let the emails pile up and I'm like, uh-huh.

So I sat down. I was going to go through it all. I was going to get as much done as I humanly could. So I went to YouTube, went to go turn on music. And, you know, I typed in – I'm trying to think of what it was. It was like music to study to or one of those ones, right? Just some background, not necessarily music that has lyrics, but more like chill jams. And so I put that on.

And as I was typing that in and trying to find that stuff, I noticed that a girl who I don't want to dox her, we'll say. A girl who I had noticed from, I think it was TikTok, but it might have been something else. Doesn't even matter, during the pandemic, right? She was an ASMR person who was doing stuff on TikTok and then eventually moved to YouTube. And she started a YouTube channel, I'm going to say

2021-ish, right? And I noticed her on the side. And I was like, oh damn, I haven't seen that girl in forever. And one of her TikToks made me laugh so hard that I was like, damn I haven't seen that girl in forever and and one of her TikToks made me laugh so hard that I was like yo all right what's going on with her so I clicked her YouTube channel blew up like is so big and I was like how how how is this? What am I doing wrong? What am I doing wrong that she just exploded in the public? I'm talking 14 million views a month, 40k subs a month, is posting roughly eight videos a month. I could have just done this.

I could have just talked into a microphone from my bedroom and be a millionaire. But here I am making podcasts and video game things like some idiot working 14 hours a day. Her video is like 15 minutes long, dude. I was like, this is outrageous. This is outrageous. So I went through the videos because, you know, now I'm downward spiraling, being like, what am I even doing with my life? This is here I am going through emails. All I can be doing is making like, and I'd be fine. And so I went through her videos.

And what's crazy is because I went back to the beginning, which would be 2021-ish, and then started scrolling through to now. which would be 2021-ish, and then started scrolling through to now. And I noticed many things because I was like, yo, this girl's life must have changed completely. The first thing I noticed was one of her most recent videos was her doing a video in her car, brand new car, a very expensive car. And I was like, okay. And then I noticed going back through, she changed her hair. She changed her teeth. She changed her teeth. She changed her face.

Right? She clearly got breast enlargement. She bought a new house. Right? All these different things are happening. I'm like, God damn. I wish I had the money to do that stuff. I would love all those things.

And what's crazy is, and this is what made me go down a complete rabbit hole. It's like, she's not what you, when you think ASMR and you think popular, you always think like, oh, it's the hot girl. And dudes are just like horny for the hot girl going like, no, this isn't her at all. She's like a normal ass human. And it's, I was like blown away. So then I go down the rabbit hole even more where I start seeing other people who are hyper successful at ASMR. This one girl just wears sweatshirts. 1.6 million subs in two years doing ASMR. And I'm like, come on.

And I went and I looked at her video. One video, 15 minutes, 900,000 views, her eating a pencil. Like just munching on a pencil. Like not eating, eating, but like munching on it, right? Right. And it's her just like, that's the ASMR. 900,000 views, 15 minutes of just that. No talking.

No, I was like, I'm doing it wrong. Everything I do isn't correct. I should have just done this. Right? I cannot even begin to describe to you the existential crisis I had. The worst part was it was like in the middle of the night too. So it was already like just nighttime. Like everything about me is a failure.

Everything I do, I work so hard. And these people are just like, today I made a video where i slapped my cheeks for like five minutes so they'd go and then it's like 5.6 million views i'm like i can't i can't win i can't win and i just laid there in my bed was like i'm gonna need another edible and just like was done just like might as well let the world take me. This is some bullshit. It stunned me. I need to not look at stuff like that. Because I just, I'm used to people being more successful.

I get it. I'm happy where I'm at. It's not like I'm mad. But it's always jarring when you see someone be so successful for reasons you cannot figure out. Well, I mean, I can figure out the reasons yeah and it's just the people like asmr i mean i get that i understand that but there's so much asmr out there right that you feel like it would be flooded but what i'm realizing looking through all the ASMR people is even the people who are brand new are getting great views. And it has to be because they're rewatchable and people like the noise in the background. They just put it on loop or whatever.

But it's just jarring to me that there are so many ASMR people and it seems like all of them are kicking ass. And I'm like, how is that possible? Surely you'd be cannibalizing your own viewership. Nope. People, I guess, just need background noise constantly in life. And I'm one of them. I get it. But I'm just like, why?

Why am I not good enough? Should I just make a channel that's like, hey, everybody. Like, to me, that would drive me crazy. I'd be like, Jesse, this is the worst thing you've ever done but maybe i'm the problem crendor maybe i'm the problem oh you're definitely the problem see the problem right now is you don't you don't fully get it you're saying you get it but i don't think you do fully get it and i never have let's be clear yeah so no you don't get it you you understand it but you don't get it that's me with everything that happened after the year 2000 i understand it but

it's like listen like i listen to asmr every night to go to sleep and i listen to like the same two videos and it's just ting ting ASMR and every night it's just like hi guys welcome back and I'm just like all right nice and I'm I always think like that's probably in my brain like triggering the sleep response like all right we heard that get ready to go sleep so that way and then if I struggle falling asleep one night I swap to the other video and I only listen to the ones that are like an hour long. Because if they're not an hour long, if it's like 20 minutes, and I listen to that, and I'm still awake, and I hear it ending, I'm like, uh-oh, I'm not falling asleep. If it's an hour long, I'm like, I'll be asleep by then. You know?

I know. I know. I understand. See, for me, the reason why I know that I will never truly understand it is because for me, the noise of like that stuff, I'm like, hmm. Well, you got to find your noise. No, no. But I'm saying like none of it helps me sleep. Even when people are like rain noise, right? I love rain noise, but rain noise isn't gonna knock me out what i need is a great example is when we had that brand deal with the like books on tape kind of vibe right oh yeah not

i'm not gonna say the name because they aren't paying us so screw them but when we had that i wouldn't listen to the noises or i wouldn't listen to the soundscapes of the music. I would listen to the ones that's like, hello, my name is Celebrity and today I'm going to read you a book about trains. And I was like, yeah! And the same thing with, like, I'll listen to news broadcasts at night where it's like, today on the news, and I'm

like, to sleep I go. But for some reason, if it's someone's like, or it's someone who like or someone is like hello pancakes or it's rain or it's like a highway not whatever it is that just keeps me up

I'll sit there and listen to it and be like this sounds awesome but I can't sleep and then if I put on some person droning on about like today I'm going to read the phone book I'm like there we go phone book. I'm like, there we go. Good night, everybody. I mean, there is ASMR like that.

I feel like that's what I should do. Yeah, you need to find that. There's plenty of people do that. They like read stuff for hours. Yeah, but I bet they aren't as successful. I don't know. I would say they probably are. They probably do a blend, if anything.

They probably do both. No, I don't want to blend. I'm going to be like, again, the people that I was't know. I would say they probably are. They probably do a blend, if anything. They probably do both. Nah, I don't want a blend. I'm going to be like, again, the people that I was going through... I'm saying they have one video dedicated to that and another video... Oh, no, I know what you're saying. What I'm saying is the people that I scrolled through,

all of their videos are the exact same video, just done in a different location. The exact same noises, the exact same... They're done in a different location. The exact same noises. The exact same... And they're getting like a million views. If I got a million views for something, all I do is go down the street to a different location, do the same thing. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.

I want that. I'm tired of working. I put in my dues. I want the freebies. Let me have this. let me have the free where's my million view video where i just like talk for six minutes and you guys are like damn where's that where's my freebie the kids don't care the kids don't care you're right that's the problem that's the truth of it what's crazy is i was looking at someone trying to figure out

why mr beast does what he does uh with thumbnails or videos whatever like he makes his videos too bright he makes his thumbnails look cartoonish and weird and all of it tracks to he's just trying to get a younger audience so it's like cigarettes he's marketing to kids so that they'll be there for the next 10 years he's not stupid he knows what's up and you know i certainly don't do that i'm not like hey everybody it's me i'm like hey oh shit another day being old like no kid wants to hear that well i feel like you used to be more like that. It used to always be like, Fran Friday! Right? Yeah.

Oh, yeah, no. That was beaten out of me. Yeah. Who beat it out? Some YouTube algorithm creature. And if you want to know the truth, it was because YouTube literally said Fan Friday is a different thing every Friday. And even

though it's the same day and the same time, because it's different content, people tune in differently because, for example, if you play one game and they like it, but you play another game and they don't like it, the algorithm doesn't know to send it to them

anymore because uh they watched one and then didn't watch the other so to the algorithm that means they didn't like the series uh i feel like it's gotten better since then though strongly disagree i don't know strongly disagree i think it's still bad and terrible. And honestly, I should have just done ASMR. I should have just been like, hello, it's me. I mean, there's like master ASMR. I would say that the algorithm knows what people tend to like and what people don't tend to like for the most part. Obviously, there's

exceptions and it knows that some videos and topics are going to do better than others even if it's related under a top like if you do fan friday for one game and it's a popular game everybody's playing they'll be like yo i'm gonna watch you play that but if it's just like some random game that people don't really care about they might be like i'll skip this one i don't really care i hear what you're saying but i also know that one time i watched exactly one asmongold video and my entire front page was 35 asmongold videos so i'm just saying i don't think it's entirely accurate well you're yeah but you're comparing yourself to like one of the biggest people on the platform it's just it's flooding the youtube so obviously I'm saying the algorithm

is hitting me up with a bunch of those videos when all I did was watch the one. And it's like, well, you gotta want to watch more. I'm like, no, I just wanted to watch the one. And that's the problem. It doesn't do that for me. It went away because I was like,

stop doing this. Oh. Well, I mean, usually, if you start watching something else, they'll start recommending you more of those videos. Yeah, but I don't watch enough. I don't spend enough time watching. Well, then you're not the target YouTube audience. Well, that's stupid. Everyone should be the target audience.

I hate YouTube. I hate it. Like, when I go to my homepage, it recommends me things that do make sense. Like what? What's something it recommends for you? Like, it recommends Warhammer Old World stuff. It recommends some physical therapy, some football things I've been watching. Like, it's all pretty good. There good there's like a couple things here and there

where I'm like whatever if I scroll down a bit hey look it's a geek ender episode look at that the channels that are super big and get constant traction I think it just tries to like sneak in the people randomly I think that's the main thing

yeah but you know again the algorithm does that and and the algorithm sucks. So whatever. I'm over the algorithm. I don't even care. I mean, I think the algorithm's doing all right. I don't think it's great, but I think it's better than it used to be. Okay.

I mean, look, you're allowed to be wrong. Like, for example, like pointless top 10s. I can generally figure out how well a pointless top 10 is going to do based on the topic so like for example i know if i do an npc one it's going to do pretty well because people like npcs like flight masters or like npcs you should know about and then if i do things like windmills or yetis or like you know random things those usually do worse but then if i do like creepiest things in world war like houses in the middle of nowhere that usually does

better and a lot of times it's because it just hits a broader audience like most people watching yetis are probably just playing the game being like ah cool another crendor thing whatever but people are just like houses in the middle of nowhere. You're like, ooh, this is something I don't know, and they click on it. Sure, sure, but what you're not doing is once that one blows up, so for example, creepiest NPCs in WoW, right? Once one of those blows up, you don't then do like, creepiest NPCs in WoW, two. Creepiest NPCs in WoW, three.

You don't do that, which is what the algorithm wants you to do, right? And so when you don't do that which is what the algorithm wants you to do right and so when you don't do that the algorithm punishes you by making it more of a pain in the ass to get stuff to people i wouldn't say it's punishing me it's just i'm not doing the thing that makes the most sense and gets right no i'm saying you're creating what you want to create you're creating the like you are embracing the active process of creation, and it's things that you want to share with the world. Correct. And YouTube is saying, nah, you should share that other thing that we like better. That's what I'm saying.

It's hampering you. I don't think it's hampering me. I think people just would rather watch that other thing. Is YouTube in the room with you right now? No. Are you? Is there a gun to your head what is happening listen i'm just saying i'm just saying i think a lot of it's based off the audience

and sometimes if you put a lot of work and effort into a video and it doesn't do well i think there's a thing of like ah it's the algorithm when a lot of times just people don't care as much or at least a broader audience doesn't care so you're telling me my next video should just be called Porn Games. Do you think that'll do well? It would. I mean, as long as it doesn't get flagged or something, then yeah, probably. All right, done. That's it.

I'm not even joking. My next video, to prove a point, I'm going to make a video about porn games. This is happening. This is happening. I guarantee you that video will do extremely well. In fact, I watched If it doesn't, I'm going back on this show. I tried to make a broad video, dude.

But if it works, you have to be like, Crendor, I can't believe how right you were. I will. I will do that. This is not a joke. This is not a joke. Alright, perfect. Dude, I'm telling you. It's gonna work. I can't wait to prove you wrong. No, I'm telling you, it's going to be amazing.

All right. Okay. I'm here for it. If anything, it feels more now than ever. YouTube goes based much more on an individual video basis than it used to. And so it knows that certain video topics get more clicks more generated watch time and everything and when it starts hitting that then it's like yo i think more people are gonna want this and so when it starts pushing it to people outside of the sub

circle then if you know world of warcraft timmy's just clicking through and he sees like yetis he might be like yetis whatever but if he sees like creepiest NPCs like oh there might be something on that list I don't even know about so he's gonna click it because it's just much more engaging to click on and that happens for a bigger demographic and then it keeps rolling and rolling and eventually the snowball stops

which I think is just like that for a lot of videos I don't know I mean I don't know exactly mean I don't know is exactly how I feel about all of it that's the truth I don't know I don't know

but that video is going to do well I guarantee okay we'll see we will what else did you do this week I can't talk about what I did this week I went to an event played a thing that I can't talk about what I did this week. I went to an event, played a thing that I can't talk about, but

they were like, hey, make sure to bring a capture card. I was like, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I have my laptop and I have this plug and play thing that I'll plug in, I'll film it on OBS. This will be great. Went to go to my closet where I have the laptop

in my go bag for events like this. Or when I travel. And I was like, alright, set up. This looked good. Could not find the extension that lets you hook HDMI to the OBS so I can record it. I was like, huh. What did I do with that? So I proceeded to tear my entire apartment,

like just through everything, tear it all down. Here's the crazy thing. I realized, even though I spend multiple hours trying to get rid of stuff in order to minimize the amount of things I have in my apartment so I can find stuff quickly, I still couldn't find it. And so I was like, oh no, what did I do? Did I put it in a bin somewhere? What the hell did I do with it? So now I'm looking through the three bins that I have in my apartment, and one is like a bunch of Monster Prom one-off merch stuff that I'm going to keep forever, and one is like a bunch of tech stuff,

and I was like, oh, well, it's got to be in here. So I'm going through the tech stuff stuff I'm looking through the HDMI cables and the Ethernet cables and like all the plugs and nothing I'm like okay so then I go to the next box the next box is microphones and stuff that I may need eventually so I look through that and I'm like

how's it not in here so I go to the box that has the Monster Prom stuff in it thinking there's no way it could be in here I open that up and I don't see it I'm like so what did I lose it? this makes no sense so I start

tearing down my apartment looking everywhere I'm looking under stuff in drawers that have silverware I'm like where did I put this? turns out that it was just in the bag the entire time in a place I just didn't think to look. And now my apartment is a mess,

and the part of me that knows I need to clean it is also the part of me that's like, I don't even care anymore. I'm not an ASMR person. I'll never have a bajillion dollars. I'll never get to be on the moon. And life isn't like, yeah, you know, that kind of stuff. So that was my week.

Yeah. I've actually kind of been trying to clean stuff as well. Yeah. I had a basket full of stuff under my desk. I've uh, I've actually kind of been trying to clean stuff as well. Yeah? I uh, I had a basket full of stuff under my desk, and I was like, I hate having like baskets of stuff, cause you just gotta dig through them. When you say baskets of stuff, what do you mean? Like, it's uh, like a wicker basket. Alright?

Mm-hmm. And it's just got like controllers, wires, wires random things just like a bunch of like just shit in there and i'm like oh yeah but like you get to a point where i'm just like yeah that's the basket i know what's in there except for like some of it and i was like you know what i'm just gonna go through it and then i'm gonna you know sort it and i'm gonna i bought like a container store container what do you call it like a drawer and so it's got like two drawers and so the bottom drawer i put all my controllers and like a couple electronic things in the top one i put like notepads and a book and uh something else the oh yeah the little notepads i write or draw the dumb sub goal stuff on

i was gonna ask what you use those notepads i write or draw the dumb sub goal stuff on i was gonna ask what you use those notepads for but you know what dumb sub goals is an accurate depiction oh yeah description those have been great because i've drawn you numerous times i know i'm aware oh i'm aware yeah as pokemon as a sloth as the various things um so yeah it felt good organized so i want to keep organizing you know it's like the small victories you just keep going you know slowly through every little area until you get through all of them instead of being like i gotta clean everything and then you just don't do anything yeah well that's my problem is now everything is everywhere i've got three bins completely emptied out and not like a sensible way in a panicking day of before i go to this event i need to find this why why

didn't i think to look for this earlier kind of way and stuff's just thrown everywhere my apartment is a mess i'm it is an. I would not invite a soul over. And I'm like, okay, cool. Well, I guess I'll clean this up. And it's been exactly four days. And I have not touched any of it. I just look at it. And I'm like, mm-mm, go to bed.

I'm like, you know what? Mm-mm. I come. I will leave the house to not look at it. Like, you know what? I will leave the house to not look at it. I went to the mall and walked around the mall rather than I just can't handle it. And I know I have to go back today and clean it.

And I'm just trying to psych myself up to do so. You got to do the five minute thing. I can't five minute anything. I gotta clean it all because what's gonna happen is tomorrow I got guys coming over to work on the damn paint job they promised me they'd do and I don't want them to see my mess.

I have to clean it today. I have to. I can't be judged by random painters, dude. I can't have that on my conscience. At least it always requires a breaking point. It just so happens this breaking point is the painters coming.

Right? Well, yeah. I mean, like, that's the way it is, of course. This is the equivalent of, like, you waiting until the last second to do your whatever. Everything. Waiting to do everything. Yeah. Well, at least they'll get taken care of that's good yeah yeah yeah uh the only other

thing I wrote down was we were watching Family Feud we hadn't watched in a while but we turned it on and they had a category that said hold on where did i hold on let me get this it said all right uh what is something that olive oil would tell popeye uh before they got married like what would she want him to do uh yeah no okay i'm some of it okay yeah some of it was just like eat better spinach or like it was a really dumb category it was like uh grow a beard uh it was stupid one of them was get rid of smelly urine.

And Steve Harvey. I'm sorry, pardon? It said get rid of smelly urine. And Steve Harvey was like, what the hell? I was like, yeah, what? And they had three. Three people said that. I was like, is there like a Popeye thing where he has like his urine smells?

Is that people think that he's eating asparagus? Yeah, I think that's what it is. They're eating asparagus, but it's spinach. So they're just like, oh, yeah, but yeah, it's not. So I think that's what it was. So at least three people said that is what you're saying. Yeah, at least three. It sounds like, have you seen that Always Sunny in Philadelphia episode where they go on family feud?

No. It's amazing. And the best part is that Charlie, the entire time, keeps guessing the most insane things. And then for some reason, it's always up there. And they're like, who did we quiz for this where did this come from and then it's revealed that charlie did one of these quizzes at a mall or something and he is one of the answers which is why he's winning and it reminds this reminds me of that where it'd be like what's one thing to check for before going to bed and he'd be like ghouls he's like let me see ghouls and there's like one person that says ghouls

it seems like it seems like what should popeye do uh i don't know not have stinky pee okay yeah it's very weird yeah i'm gonna watch that actually it's so funny i pulled it up on the YouTube.com. Oh, yeah, you got it. This is good stuff. So, yeah, that's all I did. Well, you know what else you can do? What?

One thing you can do is express love. Because love is in the air. And love can be anything as we approach this Valentine's season. If you're married, or you're single, or just happy to have good friends, or stuck in some sort of spiral of situationships that leads you down to the void in your soul, that is the understanding that I'm your one true love, and you definitely should have hooked up with me instead of whatever the hell that situation was. Everyone deserves to celebrate love. And while me undies can't get you back that lost time chasing that F boy

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I got otters on. Oh, see, all right. Well, yours is otter themed. Mine is appropriate today, because I've got hearts. It's black, but they've got neon hearts with different colors on them. Love it, big fan. Yeah, oh yeah,

I'm feeling it. Well, my otters are holding hands, so that's kind of... You know what, that's more romantic, I think. Yeah, they're swimming backwards. But hey, you can, if you want otters or hearts, you can even get more sauce if you want. I know for a fact, over on their site, they've got peaches and eggplants print. You know, for those of you out there who want to keep it a little more mobile. But if it's too much for you, they've also got classic colors or simple colors.

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slash Cox. That's MeUndies.com slash Cox for 20% off plus free shipping. MeUndies. Comfort from the inside out. Alright, Crandall, let's go. Crandall has a traffic order. Oh oh boy the traffic is actually pretty all right it's pretty decent traffic um nothing too bad there's like everything's done it's just kind of cold but even then it's gotten a bit warmer so it's not it's it i mean the traffic's actually pretty good

by the way i realized that i have so many me undies that i've been wearing for so long that i don't even remember what other underwear i used to wear because i literally have worn me undies for like as long as i can remember remember at this point back dude that's actually true i'm sure i had like some sort of boxer years it's been 10 it's been 10 years. Over 10 years. Yeah. I legit can't remember. I think I bought like one. I used to buy some of like Old Navy. And that was like when I was like 18, 19. Like that's as far back as I can remember.

Yeah. I don't. I wish I had answers for you. I don't. I don't know what the last pair I bought that wasn't MeUndies, but here we are. Yeah. That's your traffic all right let's go to other first we got a follow-up message from last week where they said hey my weather request got in I've been listening to this podcast since day one and this is my first weather request i saw wan dong when driving from melbourne back to canberra and

crendor is 100 correct i chose it because it has dong in the name you know what we know our audience yep uh but this week we've got the most voted up weather request which is hobart tasmania the capital city of Tasmania which houses around half of the state's population Tasmania is mostly known for the picturesque nature and bushland with about a third of the state being protected bushland the history of Tasmania rides largely on it being the gateway to Antarctica with the black war a decade in the 1800s where the British colonists killed almost the entire population of Aboriginal Tasmanians. What the shit?

Holy shit. Nicknamed Apple Isle, Tasmania is known for growing fresh produce, mainly consisting of apples, but with an abundance of other fruit crops too. Tasmania is home to Mona, the Museum of Old and New Art, which has some very weird,

interesting artworks and a host of annual midwinter festival car called Dark Mofo, which is one of the biggest events in the yearly Hobart calendar. That is more than I, about Tasmania

than I ever thought I'd ever know. I'm not even gonna lie. I don't know where Tasmania is. South of Australia. Oh. Well, Australia. Oh. Well, that checks out.

We were literally looking at it last week. Were we? Listen, I don't know. You're just talking about how you forget everything, alright? I forget many things. Well, in Hobart, Tasmania, Australia, it's 80 degrees Fahrenheit. In in fact woppy you handle

it woppy activated 80 degrees fahrenheit humidity 40 percent pressure 29.7 inches visibility 9 miles 607 a.m sunrise 8 39 p.m sunset when 16 miles per hour 2.53 UV index, 9 of 11, moon phase waning, give us 10 day. Beep, beep, beep, 77, mostly sunny, Tuesday, Wednesday, 73, partly cloudy, Thursday, 71, mostly cloudy, wind 64, Friday, partly cloudy, wind Saturday, 78, partly cloudy, Sunday, 77, cloudy, Monday, a.m., shawawa, wawa, wawa. Shawawa, wawa.. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. Show wow, wow, wow. Show wow, wow, wow. I think I sped him up a little too bit. A little too bit. A little too bit.

I'm looking through, doing our normal look through. And I will say, Tasmania. There's a vibe here that is so very American. And I realize, once again, the reminder, Canada, Australia, and America are just the stepchildren of the UK. We're all siblings, and we're not that different. I will say, though, the names, the food is American as hell.

Right. Like, absolutely, absolute everything the cafe is all of it but the names are man just my favorite there's a cafe called room for a pony that looks like they make both pizza and coffee and like that place looks delicious. There's a place called Bite Me Restaurant. There's T-Bone Brewing. There's the Cyclo. There's the Bar Wah. There's, right? They got all the names.

There's Boodle Beasley. Boodle Beasley. Boodle Beasley looks like a combination American, maybe, I don't know, Korean? I can't, it's hard to tell. But they do have a Korean place I'm looking at right here. It's a Tasty Korea Chicken. That's got 4.6 stars. I'd eat the hell out of that.

Oh, yeah. All of it looks great. All of it looks great. And it makes me wonder if I should go to Tasmania at some point because it's the most inviting looking. Everything that I'm looking at is like 4.6, 4.4, 4.3. Yeah, everything does look pretty good. Pascal. Yo, Jean Pascal, your pastries look delicious, bro.

Whoa, man. If you go south of Room for a Pony, there's a place called Pigeonhole. I see Pigeonhole. Pigeonhole looks amazing. That's what I'm saying. Again, Pigeonhole. All these places we're looking at, they look great.

And they're all little tiny places. I wonder, like, scale-wise, what's the vibe? Also, I've now realized that Hungry Jack just seems like Burger King. Is Hungry Jack Burger King? It is, right? It's got it. We can all agree on that? Wait, is it?

Are you sure it's not like a Jack in the Box thing, or is it straight up just Burger King? The logo is Burger King, but it just says Hungry Jack. It's Burger King, though. It's like one of those UK things where they name, you know, like Lay's something else. Like, oh, Slappy's. I don't know. Yeah, the old Snappy's. Yeah, they got all sorts of names.

The University of Tasmania. So is Hobart like the big college town or is it the big city? What's the big, what's the big, big Tasmania city? It's got to be, it's got to like pop up. Hobart, it says it's the big, it's the big city. Oh yeah, I guess it is. But they, no wait, that's a museum thing. Yeah, I don't know. I guess i guess it is yeah hobart's number

one oh there's a place called the drunken admiral it looks pretty sick i mean it's all gonna be sick the thing is all the food looks like real fresh for a place that i imagine it's hard to get food to i don't know how it works i'm sure a lot of it's just seafood. I don't know. I'm seeing a lot of like pastries and eggs and meat. I mean, those things do. Okay. You know what? Shut up.

You know what? There's new checkout. But there's like a lot. I don't know. For those of you who are in Tasmania listening, what is the vibe? Because I keep seeing every restaurant we click on is also a cafe. It seems like every single one is also a cafe. It seems like a very cool, hipstery Australian area.

I guess. I don't know. Giddy up food store. Come on. This place is called Giddy Up Food Store. And they straight up just sell. Again, it's a cafe. It's a cafe.

But also at the same time, they're serving some sort of shrimp Asian dish. This place. Yeah. This just looks great. I mean, it's. Yeah. Everything's a bistro. This is wacky.

We never said it, but, or we've never done this on the weather report. That's what I meant to say. I went and looked at the weather map. We've never done it at Tasmania, which is actually kind of crazy. You think for once we'd be like, yeah, Tasmania, like the Tasmanian devil, right? You would think. Yeah. So now we have.

Look at that. What's the internet like in Tasmania? Also, what is the cost of a house? I mean, the size of Tasmania is like, it's like a pretty decent sized place. Hobart, the average house is $817,000. Okay, well, never mind. Damn.

Yeah, it's like a little smaller than Ireland, but not like that much smaller. Ireland's 32,000 square miles, and then Tasmania's 26,000. The more you know, we're learning things. Yeah, that's weather. All right, let's go to sports. Sports.

Oh, boy. Sports. Currently, the NFC championship game is occurring and the Lions were winning 24 to three or seven. And now they're losing 27-24. So I wanted Ravens-Lions, and it looks like it's going to be Chiefs-49ers. So I had a feeling that would happen because every time I want two teams to go,

they always fail. You really are the jinx. I really am the jinx. So I guess I'll be kind of watching the super bowl but not really caring again so that's fun haven't haven't we had chiefs 49ers before i believe we have yes we actually live we have yes yep in fact i don't even yeah it was 2020 it's even that long ago yep february i was about to say it sounds very familiar and i don't yeah i too do not care yeah so all my 49ers fans who live in la bless i'm happy for you to my chews fans out there god bless i literally could care

less yeah i that's what it ends up being like all, all right, cool. They're just, I don't know. I don't care either. But whatever, cool. Then, listen, they got to get their, everyone's got to get their stuff in before the great Packard dynasty arrives very soon.

Watch out, everyone. It's coming. Yep. So then we have basketball where currently the Celtics are on top. The Bucs are in second place. They just fired their coach and hired Doc Rivers. And the 76ers in third. In the West Conference, we got the Thunder and Timberwolves up top.

The Clippers game behind and the Nuggets half game behind. I'll battle it out over there. And in hockey, we've got the Bruins at the top uh the rangers at the top the avalanche at the top and the canucks at the top of all their divisions and that is sports okay what is our fact of the day. Day. Day. Day. Day. Day. Day. Day.

Fact of the day. The blob of toothpaste on a toothbrush has a name. Which is? It's called a nurdle. Oh, dude. I just put a little nurdle. I got a little nurdle of toothpaste. Instead of a dab or a drip or a drop it's a nurdle That's the British thing

I got post nurdle drip Wait no not post Nasal nurdle that's it Post nurdle drip There was once a lawsuit over which Toothpaste company had the right to portray it To portray a nurdle I guess Portray a nurdle i guess portray a nurdle

um which company was it colgate uh it doesn't say again this is cosmo you're not getting any you know in there it was colgate versus glaxo settling the nurdle i had to look this up this is so this is exactly how you would think it's pronounced or said or spelled. Nurdle. N-U-R-D-L-E. And the two companies, GlaxoSmithKline and Colgate Palmolive, which by the way,

when you hear the fact that the companies that used to be one thing are now multiple things, it's gross. Colgate Palmolive, you know, the toothpaste people and the Palm olive people are together and glaxo smith klein sounds like the shittiest lawyers anyway apparently it was claimed uh that glaxo smith klein was the ones who wanted to use nurdle but colgate was like no no it's us we use nurdle and then Colgate was like, no, no, it's us. We use nurdle. And then it's just so complicated and stupid in the end. The lawsuit claimed that Colgate's use of nurdle to market its toothpaste is potentially

confusing to Glaxo customers. What's confusing is anyone thinking the word nurdle is going to help sell your product. No one's out there like, man, I can't wait to stick some nurdle in my mouth. No one's doing that. man i can't wait to stick some nurdle in my mouth no one's doing that yeah like we need nurdle this is extremely important like guys this is important to our brand no it's not trust me on this it is not important yeah nobody nobody even know nobody even knew i didn't know yeah but of course you, companies be company. We need Nerdle. We need Nerdle.

They should. I mean, if you win that, you have to make a mascot named the Nerdle. Right. Oh, yeah. Papa Nerdle. Yeah. Yeah. Papa Nerdle.

Grandpa Nerdle will protect you. Yeah. And then he's married to the toothbrush. And they always are like. Wait, what? I don't like that. I don't like the implication there. No, the implication is you're telling me that Nerdle leaves a goopy white mess on his wife, the toothbrush?

Bro, is that what you're telling me? That's how we're selling this that's the marketing I'm just saying they go together okay that's all I'm saying good thing you're not involved in marketing we'd be cancelled immediately

that's true we probably would but I think people would remember us we would be remembered like the cavemen Geico guys exactly That's true. We probably would. But I think people would remember us. We would be remembered like the cavemen Geico guys. Exactly. You know, people would be like, where are those cavemen commercials? And we'd be like, that was us, but with toothpaste that, you know, squeezes itself out on its wife brush.

And then it goes, I'm a nurdle. That's it. Yeah. That's it. Yeah, that's it. Yeah. So that's the fact of the day. All right. What is our big news story of the day? All right. Big news story of the day.

Day. Day. Day. Day. So somebody tweeted this at the movie that tweeted this at me but this is from like last august whatever it's still crazy so a tampa bay mayor reels in 70 pounds of cocaine during her family fishing trip right right right sure reeled it in while on a fishing trip in the florida keys with her family tampa mayor jane castor reeled in an unexpected catch 70 pounds of cocaine estimated to be over a million dollars how did how do you wait oh i have some i hopefully it's answered

i hope this article answers it, because how does that happen? Castor, who previously served as Tampa's police chief, said the drug bail appeared to have been floating in the water for a while already when she found it. Quote, you know, my family was concerned, like, oh my gosh, what if they think it's ours? She joked in an interview. And I'm like, come on. So we pulled it up. And then as soon as we were in cell phone range, called to notify them. The mayor reported her family's discovery to the Monroe County Sheriff's Office and the drugs were seized by federal agents.

Chief Patrol Agent Walter Slozar of the U.S. Border Patrol Miami sector confirmed in a tweet they had seized 70 pounds of cocaine originally discovered by a recreational boater in the Florida Keys. The drugs have an estimated street value of $1.1 million, they wrote in their tweet. Castor told CBS Miami it was her brother who first spotted the bale while fishing. Quote, my younger brother saw some debris in the water, so we went over there, because quite often, if you fish, the smaller fish will go under any kind of shade they can get.

That attracts the larger fish. Yo, this is the answer. This is what I'm looking for. So they didn't just stumble on it. They saw debris and were like, oh, under the debris, little fish hide, and big fish go to the debris

to get the little fish. Yeah. That's good reporting. There we go. That's what i'm here for hey good job cbs news uh we thought it was shade as opposed to something shady but you know the closer we got once i saw the rip in it and i see the tightly wrapped packages i was definitely i was like definitely that's a bale of cocaine. Now, I've seen cocaine in my day. I know that's cocaine right there. That is the good stuff right there.

Now, you can see from the slight rip in the packaging, that is clearly cocaine. Yeah, and then we pulled out one, and we cut it open, and we tested it, of course, because it could have been powdered sugar, and maybe that was useful. We love making sugar cookies. So I figured like maybe it might be. But it was it was cocaine. After we went through a full bag together with the family, we knew it was cocaine. It was not the first time cocaine bails with high street values washed ashore in Florida. This past April, a package worth more than 100,000 was discovered on three different beaches in Walton County

and other counties. Each package bore a different design, with one appearing to mimic the Chanel brand logo, according to the Walton County Sheriff's Office. This one has butterflies. So, every, I assume, cocaine dealer slash

whatever, grower, grower? Manufacturer, we'll say yeah has some sort of you know symbol on it and even though butterfly is very close to what i'd want mine to be which is unfortunate i'd probably have to go into some sort of drug war what would the cox and crendor brand cocaine logo be uh oh it would have to be either like i either like we'd have probably a few. There'd be a WAPI robot head with him just like springs flying out of his mouth. Right, right, right. Yeah.

There'd have to be like an actual like Florida man, maybe Graystorm, maybe one of those. Newport Ritchie. I think it'd be Newport Ritchie. That's it. Our 100% very legal, not all legal cocaine business would be called Newport Ritchie. That'd be our game. We gotta watch out for Newport Ritchie.

They're trouble. What does that mean? Plus, it goes well, too, because when people are doing drugs, they aren't gonna be like, give me that cocaine. They'll be like, yo, you see my friend Newport Ritchie? Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got Newport Ritchie for you. See?

We're good at this. We should go into drug selling. Oh, yeah, 100%. I think we'd be good at it. I think it'd be pretty lucrative for us. Anyway, that's your news story. All right. Well, that's it for

us. Thanks so much for listening and watching. I'm going to join this podcast. Crandor, hit them with the socials. YouTube.com slash

Cox and Crandor podcast. That's where all these podcasts go up every week on YouTube and you can recommend your weather recommendations over

there and we might look at your restaurants. Also, we're on Spotify, SoundCloud, iTunes. We're all over. Or you go to YouTube.com, search Cox and Crendor for all the animations. Also, find us on our normal things.

YouTube, Jesse Cox. YouTube, Crendor. Twitch, Jesse Cox. Twitch, Crendor. Facebook, Jesse Cox. Facebook, Crendor. Crenclips, Coxclips on YouTube. I put up us playing Palworld on my Crenclips.

There's the TikTok, Jesse Cox TikToks, TikTok Crendor. I put up a new Starburst TikTok. It actually did pretty well. It got like 20,000. And a lot of the people that looked at it were like, wait, is this Crendor? And I'm like, dude, TikTok algorithm. Let's go. It's getting people. They're like, I haven't heard Crendor? And I'm like, dude, TikTok algorithm. Let's go. It's getting people.

They're like, I haven't heard Crendor in years. And Twitter, Jess Cox, Twitter, Crendor. Instagram, that's Aureus Cox. Instagram, Crendor was taken. That's it. Okay. Well, that's it for us. We'll see y'all next time.

And as always, To be continued.