Doug Loves Movies - Kurt Braunohler, Samm Levine, Nick Simmons and Jay Washington guest
Episode Date: March 13, 2023Live from the Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles, Doug welcomes Kurt Braunohler, Samm Levine, Nick Simmons and Jay Washington to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and Ca...lifornia Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Good morning, Leonard!
Doug hates candy wrappers, sweet and baby sticky seeds
With 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth
There's still not one that he won't see
Cause Doug loves movies!
Hey, hey, hey everybody!
My name is Doug, and I love movies.
This is Doug Loves Movies.
Yeah, you did it.
Coming to you from Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles.
Sounds like somebody thinks they're at a Chiefs game.
Sounds like somebody thinks they're at a Chiefs game.
It's Sunday, March 5th, 2023.
And then this particular episode, you'll get to hear it like a week from now,
like on the 13th is when this one's going to come out.
So look forward to that.
Are all of you watching The Last of Us on Sunday nights on the HBO Max? Well, then you're in luck because the prize today, the prize bag prize,
is a very elaborate and cool uh you know safety kit survival kit that says the last of us on it
and even though none of us had anything to do with it me and all of my guests today signed it
and it was also personalized for me at the the last of us premiere party i got to go to that and
and so that's why it says db on there and pink letters as they personalize it for me I don't really get
the point of that but but it's a really good sturdy metal box full of band-aids
and cold compresses and all sorts of triage shit and so you know I don't
think anyone should go into the apocalypse without it
and I'm going to
give it away today. I'm also
going to do some Doug plugs. I know
everybody comes out for the
movie trivia and the guests and
everything but some people just come out
for the plugs and
so here they are.
I'm doing stand up on March 25th
at Helium in Portland, Oregon.
Then Doug Loves Movies the next day.
Both shows start at 4.20-ish.
And Doug Loves Movies, you know how it goes.
Doug Loves Movies, I'm busy at 4.20.
And Doug Loves Movies is back here at Dynasty Typewriter on Sunday, April 16th, also at 420-ish.
You get it.
You totally get it.
You ready to get the guests out here?
All right.
It's an excited crowd, and for good reason, because we've got four terrific guests.
Finally, a show with all men.
That's right. I booked it
for you ladies
because I know how much the ladies love
an all man show.
This is going to be the magic mic
of podcasting
this particular episode.
Give it up everybody for Kurt
Braunohler, Sam Levine,
Nick Simmons, and Jay
Washington.
Oh yeah.
Look at those hot dudes.
Here they come.
Yeah, that's you.
That's you.
All you got to do is hear your name.
It's like Price is Right.
Come on down, fellas.
Hey, Sam, why don't you sit right here?
You can sit closest to me because you're small
and everyone else is huge.
And I'd like to
be able to see everybody okay.
Sam really tried to fuck me right off
the bat. What did he do?
I was ready to sit and stand
and be ready to walk right out
on stage because I'm an excellent podcast
guest. And Sam was like there's going to be
10 minutes of talking. So then I went to
use the bathroom and mid-piss is when
you introduced us.
I was looking at Katy Perry getting slimed 12 years
ago. Her face extremely
strong and I just wanted to keep watching it on repeat.
And then you called us out here.
That video's worth a Google. It's worth a Google.
I think that was one of the shortest intros.
Uh-oh, does Sam have... I also
feel like I'm a little lacking of microphone heat.
Like, no microphone heat at all.
Yeah.
It's got the little...
Is that what happened when some guests came out?
It's like the thing went lopsided,
and all the talking went to that side of the stage.
Oops.
I don't know how sound our microphones were,
but it sounds like mine's
going again too. Let's meet
everybody individually
and alphabetically
by first name.
Yeah.
Gotta be meaty. Yeah, let's make it
unnecessarily complicated.
Hot off of his appearance
on Wide World of Dugs
just the other day,
it's Jay Washington, everybody!
Hello, hello!
Yay, I'm here.
I like the balloons that are on this stage.
Yeah, apparently there was a wedding here at Dynasty Typewriter yesterday,
and they had a balloon archway that they got married under.
But Dynasty Typewriter, never to miss out on an opportunity to reuse some decor, put the balloons all over the place
and it just looks lovely up here.
Looks like a bunch of grapes.
Yeah, it really does.
It's making me think of Fruit of the Loom commercials.
Yes, I thought about this too.
We should all wear them.
We should be wearing them instead of just looking at them.
But they made a mistake here at the theater by telling me that it wouldn't be a problem
if we wanted to pop some of these balloons.
Yeah, exactly.
So, you know, things get a little, if I feel people in the audience are getting a little
sleepy, I'm going to pop some balloons.
That'll be a traumatic experience. People just sleepy, I'm going to pop some balloons.
That'll be a traumatic experience.
People just randomly just falling asleep.
Just pow, pow.
Let me tell you something.
As a black dude, I'd have woke up and ran the fuck about in.
That would be a fun way to say your answer is wrong,
to pop a balloon.
Well, this has gotten weird already.
Okay.
But yeah, we'll see how it goes. And thank you for being here, Jay. Thank you for having me. Seriously, thank you gotten weird already. Okay. I love you, dude. We'll see how it goes.
And thank you for being here, Jay. Thank you for having me.
Seriously, thank you.
All right.
He's in the hot tub every week here in Los Angeles.
It's Kurt Braunohler!
Hello.
What I'm excited about the balloons is I'm very familiar with what happens to balloons
is they slowly lose oxygen or air inside them.
And these are going to look so fucked up in like two days. Oh, yeah. familiar with what happens to balloons is they slowly lose oxygen or air inside them and these
are gonna look so fucked up in like two days oh yeah it's just gonna be a bunch of wrinkly old
bags all tied together any ones that we don't pop are definitely just gonna get weird little wrinkly
uh like you said um so your show hot tub with uh kurt and krist Kristen. Kristen and Kurt, I don't know what the billing is on that,
but it relocated recently.
Yeah, we're a permanent records roadhouse.
And every Wednesday night, 8 o'clock, baby.
Yeah.
It's a fun show.
Yeah, and we've had a harsh winter here in California.
Real rough to start an outdoor show.
It's a weird winter to start an outdoor show,
but we know
ramping into spring and summer, I'm sure it'll be fine.
I'm sure it'll be too hot in the summer.
So you get to experience
all the extremes.
And for people who aren't in Los Angeles,
why don't you go watch my new comedy special, Perfectly Stupid,
for free on YouTube, okay?
Free!
Free!
They're clapping for free.
No one has seen that special.
We do all the plugs at the end.
I'll just do a clever edit there.
And I'll do it.
I mean, somebody else will do it if they remember to,
and they're not going to.
We don't edit the show, but thank you.
Thank you for being here
Kurt I appreciate it
and it's his first time
on the show guys
so be gentle
as they say
yeah it's Nick Simmons everybody
I don't like
that intro be gentle
come on
I am going to lose but come on
you want everybody
to go hard
is what you're saying?
I'm not.
There's no winning
this question.
I can't.
You want everybody
to tear you apart.
I mean,
Sam and Jay,
I think,
already have
an ongoing rivalry
because
they're both looking around
like,
no, we don't.
Can't you help me out here and have an ongoing relationship?
We're trying to get together race relations, and you're trying to tear us apart.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Have you guys ever competed in the Schmoes No competitions or anything?
Numerous times.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
Sam has been an evil commissioner on the movie Tribute to the World.
That's what I thought.
I thought I was setting that up, and you're both looking at me like,
what are you talking about?
We've never met.
You could have brought in Jeff Tate.
It would be only a little bit worse for me today.
You brought in like heavy hitters and then like, hi, I'm not even a professional comedian.
I don't know.
I haven't even seen all the Oscar movies.
You're not a comedian.
You don't know movie trivia.
What the fuck am I doing here?
What a fucking gigantic waste of space you are.
What a DM I got.
Oh, my God.
You're the biggest guest we've ever had at the biggest waste of space.
You've had Jon Hamm.
What are you talking about?
Jon Hamm's not taller than you.
Oh, I see.
He's strippy compared to you.
But thank you for being here
and making the effort.
That's all that matters.
Just here to have fun.
Yeah, you drove all the way over here in Los Angeles.
This is kind of a hike for a lot of people getting over here.
So I appreciate it.
Sam, who I'm about to introduce, he likes to walk.
He walks here every time.
Is he making that disagreeing face again?
He keeps making that face
and he disagrees
with all of my premises.
That was just for the
audience here.
The home audience
would have had no idea
I was disagreeing.
It's true.
Ladies and gentlemen,
give it up for the
ma'am with the plam.
It's Sam Levine!
Thank you.
Thank you.
Am I still coming in low
on this or can you guys
hear me?
I think you and I
aren't as hot as everybody else,
but that's just true in general.
Well, that's for sure.
Yeah, that's just a general description.
No, it's fine.
If you guys can hear me in the room, then, you know.
Well, we want you to be heard everywhere.
We want you to be heard on the recording.
It is a podcast.
Maybe we should fix the mic.
Yeah, we do want it to be heard,
but I feel like the crack team up in the booth
has it all under control.
I trust. I have faith.
You have to. That's all we've got.
That's all you've got. That's all we have left.
Sometimes the show is just for the people who showed up,
just for the live audience,
and that's what makes it special for them.
I think most of the time our live audience that comes out,
they spend the whole time...
Kurt, you were right.
They all tuned out.
That was a good plug.
That was good.
They spend the whole time
dreaming of this show
not ever being heard again by anyone.
Them getting to be special people
that were part of this...
We should have followed your lead.
...special experience.
This is what the audience feels?
I don't know who I'm talking about anymore, Sam.
I don't know who I represent in this scenario.
I'm just enjoying some very watered-down wine.
Some people call it a Shirley Temple.
You took the words right out of my mouth.
It looks like pure grenadine right there.
I don't think there's any...
It really is.
I think it's just grenadine in a glass.
Sounds disgusting.
I wish they'd throw a cherry in there, right?
Just spray grenadine.
Who hurt you?
I think it's wine.
It looks like the liquid that they used to use in denture commercials to show you.
They dunk a denture in there and go, oh, it doesn't even.
Or the liquid they're not allowed to use in tampon commercials.
Yo. They're not allowed. use in tampon commercials. Yo!
They're not allowed!
That's why they use blue!
It's so confusing as a kid.
I was like, this is what happens?
Thank you, Kurt!
What comes out of those women?
Blue water.
That's only the royal family.
You should see the ads on the planet of Navi.
There they go with red.
You beat me to it.
You beat me to it.
God damn it.
There was an Avatar joke coming, and I knew it was coming,
and I should have stepped in.
You knew it was going to happen.
It's just the way of the water.
It's just the water's way.
So I should mention before we continue talking to Sam
that Nick was kind enough to bring an old school gift to the show
because people used to bring donuts all the time
and then we would like chuck them into the crowd.
And so Nick brought some donuts today.
That'll be my high moment.
Yeah, when you win a game
when you win a game or I just feel like
giving you a special reward
you can pick out a donut and then chuck it
into the audience
we try not to make too much
of a mess with it
because this is a nice theater
so are we throwing them or no we can't throw them
I'm saying I think we can throw them but just don't
go too crazy I see. I'm saying I think we can throw them, but just don't go too crazy.
I'll see where I'm throwing that automatically.
Try not to throw them up into the light.
Maybe throw them underhand.
Maybe drop them on people in the front row
like a Chris Rock mic drop.
I watched that.
That's good. I understand that. That's a good one.
I understand the reference you're making.
Did you just suddenly get drunk when I wasn't looking?
I watched that.
It just came out of nowhere.
That's all I have to say about it.
I watched it.
I didn't like it or dislike it.
I have watched it.
I'm not going to commit beyond that statement.
It was a great mic drop.
Oh, yeah.
It wasn't a mic drop.
It was a mic throw.
Yeah, yeah.
He kind of threw it as he dropped it.
Yeah.
Yeah, mic drop throw.
He invented a new thing.
Anyway, Sam, thank you for being here.
My pleasure.
And tell us a little bit more about Kurt Braunholer's hot tub show.
Well, it's every Wednesday here at 8 o'clock in Los Angeles.
If you're not a local, why?
Move to L.A. and every Wednesday have a plan to go see Kurt's show.
What's so hard about that? That worked out great. I really didn't have a
question for Sam, but that worked out perfect.
Okay. Really appreciate it.
Real team players. You are a man with a plan.
You had a plan to bring us up here, and that didn't
work out right.
Before we get to the games
today,
I always do, tend to do,
something called Recommendation Nation where I ask each of my guests
to recommend a motion picture of some sort,
some genre that I've thought about
and want to have them recommend movies from.
But today, put a little spin on it
because this episode's going to come out right
after the oscars like that later that night this episode is going to be available so none of us
have any way of knowing what's going to happen on the oscars this year so i thought it'd be fun for
each of you to make some sort of prediction and then you know people listening this the next day can shake their heads like that is stupid or wow i can't believe how prescient uh those people were
yeah i even tried to pronounce it right you did thank you you're welcome
uh does anybody anxious to answer this j, do you want to go first?
Or Kurt?
Kurt's ready to go.
Go for Kurt.
All right.
My prediction is Volker Bertelman
for best composer.
Volker Bertelman
for the original score.
Volker Bertelman.
Which film did Volker do?
Let's guess.
Let's guess. Okay. Volker Bertelman which film did Volker do let's guess let's guess okay
Volker Bertelman
Avatar
what's the only German
language
Avatar and the Way of Water
yeah
all quiet on the
western front
yeah
Volker
I love scores
I'm into big scores
I love knowing the score
I love scoring
and
I think Volker Bertelman
he scores high he's big his score is big and so I think Volker Bertelman he scores high
he's big
his score is big
and so I think
Volker's gonna take it
today
it's for
it's for All Quiet
on the Western Front
it is for
All Quiet
on the Western Front
that should be ironic
for the score to win
in a movie about quiet
no they keep saying
All Quiet
and Volker's like
da da da da
they're like
shh
All Quiet
on the Western Front
and he can't stop.
He's playing.
Yeah, because that was that newfangled war
where they didn't announce themselves with a song anymore.
It was a big change.
All right, so Volker.
I'm just going to say, I'm just going to write Go Volker.
V-O-L-K-E-R.
You got this, Volker.
Yeah, it's an awesome first name
It evokes that he's maybe friends with Friedrich Nietzsche
And also that maybe he's a Vol
A small mouse
A Vol
For everybody out there
Cause you were so tickled when you said it
I did and everyone was like I don't get it
Fuck you
This one's just for me
It's a small mouse
Vols I love them Fuck you. It's a small mouse. This one's just for me, everybody. It's a small mouse. It's in my spirit.
Volker Bredeman.
I love the voles.
I love them.
All about the voles, baby.
Is his name Fievel?
Because I've seen that mouse.
Fievel?
He's coming to America. Fievel.
Was that a pun?
Fievel.
Fievel Bredeman.
Fievelker Maus.
Yeah.
In Germany, that's what it was called.
Okay.
All right, now we'll go to you, Jay.
Jimmy Kimmel and at least seven different participants in the audience
are going to reenact the Will Smith-Chris Rock slap.
Oh, they're going to take turns slapping him?
They're going to have seven different people set him up
and just keep trying to run up to slap him.
And somebody's going to actually do it,
and it might be Amy Poehler or Tina Fey.
Oh my god, this is such a good
prediction. Somebody's gonna actually do it.
They gonna make it happen, but then they gonna have
the crisis team on standby.
I hope they don't hold back. I hope they don't
do like a stage slap. I hope they don't
go for it.
Slap Amy Poehler? Shit.
How bad could it be for Jimmy
to get slapped by one person?
I mean, but what if everybody does it?
Like, it's a running gag.
It would build character.
Oh, shit, here comes Shaq.
All of a sudden, the rock comes on stage.
They make an announcement.
Will Smith is in the audience.
Everybody's like, what the fuck?
He brings out a chair.
He's like, he's got the chair.
They're going to have The Rock and nothing but a sleeveless jacket
just come up and slap him.
It's going to be a beautiful thing.
Oh, I hope it's a tie-in with the Super Bowl
and it's Mr. The Planters Peanut Guy who slaps him.
Oh, my God.
Somebody would have top-handed a monocle all day.
Keep my wife out of your fucking mouth!
That Planters Peanuts guy saying that, that would be fucking great.
The Planters Peanut Guy slaps the M&M's M&M's.
The one that went less sexy, he's like,
this is for taking off the fucking stilettos
and fucking just slapping like,
this is for Tucker Carlson
and just getting mad at shit
like,
the fuck?
The fuck is happening?
All of a sudden,
it's a very confused metaphor.
All right,
so those are pretty good,
pretty good predictions.
I think both of those things
could happen,
especially the Volker thing.
That'd be funny if Volker wasn't nominated
and you were just really pushing for it anyway.
Like, that's a prediction.
There's one hell of a write-in.
There might be some sort of write-in vote.
But that All Quiet and the Western Front
got a lot of nominations.
Did you see that movie, Kurt?
I got through half of it, yeah.
Yeah, you were only there for the score Kurt? I got through half of it, yeah.
Yeah, you were only there for the score.
Once I heard Volker's tunes,
I turned it off.
It's pretty rough, eh?
Yeah.
I could definitely go back and watch it.
It was no triangle of sadness.
But I could definitely force my way through it.
You can't rewatch Triangle of Sadness?
No. The vomit? No, I can't rewatch Triangle of Sadness? No.
The vomit?
No, I can't. Did you skip over the vomit or endure it?
No.
The Triangle of Sadness problem I have is that I watched the trailer,
and I was like, oh, this is like a fun movie about a cruise ship.
And then you get it, and you're just like, oh, it's like there's 20 minutes on a cruise ship,
and it's just a totally different movie.
I feel like I was lied to by the trailer.
Yeah.
And it seemed like a really funny movie, and then you watch it, and it's just a very slow, different movie. I feel like I was lied to by the trailer. And it seemed like a really funny movie
and then you watch it and it's just a very
slow, depressing movie.
No, it's a triangle of sadness.
It's a triangle of sadness.
The title wasn't blue.
Between you, the TV, and whoever's watching it with you,
everyone just gets sadder.
It's the Bermuda Triangle of Sadness.
Ooh.
You got a real Bermuda Triangle of Sadness. Ooh. Yeah.
We got a real Bermuda Triangle. I was a real star up there.
Oh, people died.
Oh, people didn't come back from that.
Oh, yeah.
The Bermuda Triangle of Sadness is where you disappear and nobody cares.
Nobody's upset of it.
He's like, we gotta find those pilots.
Yeah.
That's a really...
It's a polarizing movie
to be sure.
But,
Nick,
do you have a prediction?
I mean,
I was gonna say something
about who would win
an award
at like an actor
or something,
but I think we're all
going for jokes.
No,
all right,
I'll just.
Oh,
yeah,
I was gonna answer this seriously,
but you wanna fuck around?
You wanna fuck around?
We'll fuck around.
I'll give you a fuck around. No, I don't know. Look, all right, I was going to answer this seriously, but you want to fuck around? You want to fuck around? We'll fuck around. I'll give you a fuck around.
No, I don't know.
Look, all right, I'll go.
I'll just, I think Fraser should win for Whale.
I think he was great.
I think he lived up to the hype.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
So that's your prediction, Brandon Fraser for the Whale.
No, that's my joke.
It didn't land, really.
It's all right.
No, I have, there's no bid in mind.
No, no, it's good.
Yeah, it was good.
Wait, lived up to the hype was a joke?
No, it wasn't. Oh, okay hype was it a joke no it wasn't
oh okay
yeah
the joke was
it wasn't a joke
it's a joke-ception
if you will
okay
I told you I wasn't
a professional comedian
at the beginning of this
you didn't believe me
now you believe me
but you know
you don't have to go
proving it constantly
the rest of the show
is going to be one long
like huh
he said that
yeah but that's a good prediction I think it might come true to be one long like, huh. He said that, yeah.
But that's a good prediction.
I think it might come true.
Sam?
Here is my prediction,
and there's nothing comedic about this.
It's just Oscar nerd stuff.
So in the history of the Oscars,
and I know I looked this up today.
It took quite a while.
There's never been,
there have been three movies that have won the top five.
So that's Best Picture,
Best Director, Best Actress, Best Actor
and then Best either Original or
Adapted Screenplay. Only three movies have
ever won those top five. But
there's also never been
five movies that split
those five.
And I think that will happen this year.
It's finally going to happen that
Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Supporting Actor, Best Supporting Actress is going to be five different films.
Well, not supporting, but the top two acting prizes, the director and what else?
And either adapted or original screenplay.
Oh, it has to be one or the other?
Well, because whichever wins an award can't be that as well in the screenplay category.
whichever wins an award can't be that as well in the screenplay category.
But that won't be an issue this year because none of the films I think that are up for adapted could win Best Picture.
Right.
So, no, I think it – and this is a long shot bet for sure because it's never happened.
I'm going to lose this. But I think it's going to be –
I'm going to lose this game show very quickly.
I think Best Picture is going to be everything, everywhere, all at once.
Best Director is going to be Spielberg for the Fablemans.
Just because we've got to give it to him.
Yep.
Yep.
Worst movie this year.
Best actor,
Brendan Fraser.
This is my long shot.
I think Cate Blanchett
for best actress for Tar.
Ooh.
It's not that long.
I get it, guys.
It's a tough role.
And then best original
screenplay,
Banshees of Ed Sheeran.
And then best adapted will probably be All Quiet on the Western Front.
You don't think that what's her name from like Women Talking will get it just because?
I think, look, I think all this fuss, she fuck around and win it.
Like this whole campaign for her to get the nomination, she'll shock the shit out of everybody.
All right.
You don't think Brendan might get the actor? No shock the shit out of everybody alright you don't think
Brendan might
get the actor
no I just said that
you said it
oh right
yes they split it
by gender
I forgot
when are they
going to make
one for the white
eventually
but
yeah I think
it does help
your theory
or your split thing
that an actor
and actress
there aren't like
two strong contenders
from the same movie.
Right.
That worked out pretty good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I like it.
Yeah.
That's my theory.
It's a complicated prediction, but I like it.
The Academy's weird.
People don't realize the voting body of the Academy is very different than the voting body of most of the other awards.
Right.
Yeah.
Who are they? Mostly actors, though. most of the other awards. Who are they?
Mostly actors, though.
That's the biggest branch. It's a lot of actors, and the
truth of the matter is, it's a lot of old white
lady actors, is the actual
answer there. And the reason I know
this, among others, in 2004
when they were voting for the Oscars, I was
listening to a conversation between
two old white ladies who
were in the Academy, and they were talking about what they were
going to vote for for Best Picture. Quick reminder,
that was the year The Aviator lost
to Million Dollar Baby. These two were
insistent the best movies of that year
were Finding Neverland and Ray.
And that was their debate, which one
they should vote for. So that's who's voting
in the Oscars. Yeah, neither one of them
was voting on a
movie that even had a chance of winning.
What are we talking about? Jamie Foxx won Ray that year.
He did win, yeah.
But that was a one-man show, that movie.
Yeah, that was it. I'm going to make you do what you do,
baby. Yeah, that was a one-man show.
That was definitely a one-man show.
Yeah, he's so good in that movie.
But, alright, well, great
job, everybody. I hope all these predictions
come true,
especially the lining up for the slaps one.
Me too.
I think that's a really fun idea.
And, yeah, and we're going to go to our first commercial break.
We will be right back.
We're back yay
oh what a delightful name tag selection process we just experienced uh jay is playing for uh annie
i mean danny he took the movie annie and stuck a d on there, which I always thought, you know, that movie could use some D.
And then... Oh, God.
No.
What?
What do you mean?
I mean, Daddy Warbucks is clearly packing.
But after him, there's just not a lot of...
Which Annie?
Which version?
The Jamie Foxx version.
We want less D in Annie.
Doug, it's been a real treat
being on your podcast all these years. You've had a long career. I am sorry to see it end this way. You know what, Doug, it's been a real treat being on your podcast all these years.
You've had a long career.
I am sorry to see it end this way.
You know what, Doug?
It's been real.
It's been a long, fruitful career.
Did you see all that D. Harry Connick brought to the role when he played it in the...
Okay.
Well.
Kurt is playing for Juan Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
Yeah.
flew over the cuckoo's nest.
Yeah.
And Sam is playing for
the queen of Sabina.
Shibata.
And Nick is playing
for Gene. Big Daddy.
Big Daddy.
There you go.
Okay, I don't know.
I don't think you normally would call it that, but okay.
It's a movie. It's a movie.
It's a movie title.
We could have come up with a movie title. Yeah.
We could have come up with a better one than that.
We could call it Lawrence of Arabia.
The whale.
The whale.
My mom said the whale.
You make sure you do who said it.
It doesn't have to be known on the record.
It's my mom.
It's my mother who said it.
Credit where credit is due.
All right. So that's who everybody's
playing for.
Good luck to everybody.
And
the first game, get it together, Nick.
The first game we're going to play, oh wait!
Kurt brought some stuff
to give away.
People need to
know what's on the line here
because Kurt brought a couple of amazing
items.
I've got two things here.
First off, I have a fun fit featuring
Mary Lou Retton record.
It's vinyl.
It's vinyl.
It's vinyl.
Mary Lou Retton doing a crazy
thing on the back.
America's sweetheart.
Mary Lou Rett.
Because he wanted it.
Featuring tracks such as Spine Tinglers.
Working the joints.
Legs up.
What is this?
This is for children.
There are pictures of children on the back.
So there's no D in it?
Oh, there sounds like there's a lot of D in it.
Yeah, it does sound like it.
Is this a website or is this a...
Rhythm Rockers.
This is a vinyl porn.
I swear to God, that's what this is.
Reach For It.
Yep.
Yep.
That's it.
Yep.
MuscleMaker.
Yep.
And Like A Tiger.
Yep.
Oh, wow.
All of them.
And it is not scratched.
I guarantee that. Your brain ain't scratched. And then this is The Sharing Bush. Yep. Oh, wow. All of them. It is not scratched, I guarantee that.
It's damn bright and scratched.
And then this is
the sharing bush.
Again.
What is that?
This is...
Now that's got some D in it.
This definitely has some D in it.
Yeah, the sharing bush.
What is on the back?
What is on the back?
What is that on the back?
Well, this is
Shel Silverstein on the back.
Oh, Jesus.
That is not a good... That is Shel Silverstein's the back? Oh, Jesus. That is not a good picture of him.
That's not good.
This is actually Otis Toole,
noted serial killer and cannibal.
Oh, okay.
But this picture has a very similar vibe
to Shel Silverstein's photo
on the back of the giving tree.
So the story behind this book
is that I did a special
and I have a joke about the giving tree where I show the giving tree.
And and the publishers who are Harper Collins refused me the rights to the giving tree.
And so I created this, the sharing bush with Otis to Otis tools.
Photo on the back. Doug is taking the workout line.
I am not an artist.
And it illustrates a 47-page book that I illustrated.
It's not for emetophobes.
It's got vomiting in there.
Yeah, it's very upsetting.
I saw it.
Yeah, so it's not a children's book.
Don't give it to a child.
But it's in Dr. Seuss font.
I don't think any of that's for children.
It looks like a Shel Silverstein, but yeah.
Alright, there you go.
So that's going to be included with all the
safety items
from the
Apocalypse Emergency Kit.
And yeah, Nick brought donuts.
But like I said, I might chuck those into the audience.
Very PG gift.
We'll see what happens with those donuts.
We'll see what happens with those donuts. We'll see.
No one's kidding.
We'll see soon.
No one's kidding.
But first,
we're going to play
a warm-up game.
It's one of my favorite games.
It's called
Live, Die, Repeat.
Yeah.
Woo!
In this game,
I say the title
of a motion picture,
and the first person on stage
who can repeat it back
completely and entirely
and correctly
wins the game
yeah
it's that simple
do you want to do a test run?
okay like if I said Megan
see Nick would have won
because he repeated back Megan the fastest
Okay, people who have listened to the show have an edge
Yeah, he really
Gave away how it's done. Can you do another one real quick? I can yes. Are you ready? Yeah
Sound of music. Oh well see you can pre guess too and that would be a miracle
Sound amusing.
The whale.
See, you can pre-guess, too, and that would be a miracle.
It's happened.
I've seen Jeff Tate do it.
The answer.
Dr. Strange Love or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb.
Well, those are just long titles now that you're doing.
Cocaine beer.
You're not going to get it.
Take a chance.
Cocaine beer?
No, not cocaine beer.
Okay.
True Grit.
True Grit.
See, Nick wins every time time I just look at you
I'm sitting here waiting for a long ass title unfortunately
oh there will be a long ass title
I'm not going to waste it on this part
though
alright here we go
and every time somebody
gets it wrong
I'll go back to the beginning of the title
you got to say the whole thing all the words in order so he gets it wrong, I'll go back to the beginning of the title.
You got to say the whole thing, all the words, in order to win.
I have to be able to see it.
Let's get those reading glasses on.
I brought them out here for a reason.
The?
The. The.
There is a movie coming out called And
but I don't think they've
I don't think the has happened yet
but here we go
The Haunting
The Haunting of the Hill House
The Haunting in
The Haunting in Connecticut
Two
The Haunting in Connecticut
Two Ghosts Two. The Haunting in Connecticut to
ghosts
I don't know the rest.
of
Georgia.
The Haunting in Connecticut
to those in Georgia.
I think I have to give it to Sam.
I think Sam got in there just under the wire.
Oh, my God.
That was so intense.
I've never had people yelling a long title at me like that before.
I didn't know it had a subtitle.
That was so exciting.
Yeah, fucking Ghosts of Georgia, whatever that means.
Did you see that?
I could tell you were Ghosts of Georgia.
Nick seems to be familiar with the Connecticut.
I know the franchise, but I've never...
It must be in such a small font because I've definitely seen that.
Is it always...
Was it The Haunting was first and then they added Connecticut?
No, it was The Haunting in Connecticut first.
And then Haunting in Connecticut too?
Do you think it went on after that or that was it?
I don't know.
Only two hauntings in Connecticut?
I think two.
I mean, it's a small state, so, you know.
How many could there be?
I get it.
Per capita, they might not have the ghosts that we have.
More millionaires per capita than any other state.
Oh, really?
So, yeah.
Well, you'd think there'd be a lot of ghosts.
You had to bring the trivia guy on my...
He's so good at all trivia.
No.
He's just whipping out facts all the time.
Yeah.
No, it's true, but you should hear the things he doesn't know about.
Did you know that plants have things?
He's quiet when he doesn't know stuff.
That's 100% accurate.
He keeps the stuff he doesn't know, he keeps it to himself.
It's true, I don't guess.
It's a big secret, what Sam doesn't know.
All right, so congratulations, Sam.
Thanks, Doug.
You won that last game,
and all you won is the opportunity to go first in our next game.
Okay.
Yeah, and it's a little game that I like to call,
it's a brand new game.
Uh-oh.
Yeah, and it's called Angela Bassett Did the Thing.
Oh.
Yes.
Okay.
It's been nice knowing you guys.
Come on, blackness. Please, blackness, don nice knowing you guys come on blackness please blackness don't
fail me please sam sam's first dead nick dead jay dead kurt and sam is going to tell me after i name
a movie if angela bassett did the thing or angela bassett did not do The Thing.
Okay.
This is great.
This sounds awesome.
All right.
Yeah.
You got it?
Yeah.
Nope.
What part don't you
not understand?
When you say The Thing,
do you mean
action in the movie?
What do you think
Ariana DeBose meant
when she said it?
It's whether or not she did the thing, man.
Yeah, she did the thing.
She either did the thing or she didn't do the thing.
Thank you.
Hi, Sam.
To do the thing means to make sure shit done was done very, very well.
You did that shit.
You did the thing.
There you go.
Thank you, Jay.
You're welcome.
Now you better figure out and what is
and what does
Angela Bassett do for a living
she acts
yeah
does the thing
does the thing
yeah
okay cool
do I get a point
alright
great
yeah
so it's movies
Angela Bassett is in
thank you so much
yeah
none of this has been helpful
let's go
no rush no rush alright cause Sam yep you get the first one okay None of this has been helpful. Let's go. No rush.
No rush.
All right.
Because Sam, you get the first one.
Okay.
And all you got to do is tell me if she did the thing or did not do the thing.
Terrific.
And the thing I'm referring to is Mars attacks.
She did not do the thing
you do not think she appears in
the
Tim Burton 1996 classic
movie Mars Attacks
no Pam Greer is in that movie but I don't believe
Angela Bassett is
you don't get anything for telling me who is in it
I don't care
I don't care about what other things are happening
I don't care what other things people care about what other things are happening.
I don't care what other things people are doing.
We're talking about Angela Bassett.
And in this case, you're correct, Sam. She did not do the thing.
That is correct.
She is not in Mars Attacks.
Who knows what she was doing when she could have been in Mars Attacks.
Not the thing.
But she was not doing that thing.
That was not the thing that she was doing.
All right.
Sam's on the board.
He's got one point.
We move over to Nick.
Great.
The motion picture, Nick, is Independence Day.
Did she do the thing or did she not do the thing?
Don't give me that look, Jay.
I will disappoint you.
Yeah, she did the thing. You yeah she did the thing
you think she did the thing
no I have no idea
sure
I'm sorry Nick
that is incorrect
it's Biblica A. Fox
that did the thing
I don't remember
I don't even know
what this game is about
yeah see
it's a good feeling
he doesn't know it
he knows she wasn't doing
the thing somewhere else
not in the movie
she might have done
that thing that day right she could have been doing something wrap your mind around that yeah it's a good feeling. He doesn't know it. He knows she wasn't doing the thing somewhere else, not in the movie. She might have done that thing that day.
Right.
She could have been doing something.
Wrap your mind around that.
Yeah.
It's a lot.
But we're going to try to carry on.
We're going to go to Jay.
And the motion picture is Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol.
Angela Bassett did not do the damn thing. She is in Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol. Angela Bassett did not do the damn thing.
She is in Mission Impossible Fallout.
Hey, why are you not falling for my trap?
That is correct.
Wow.
That's amazing you know the difference
between Mission Impossibles.
That is beautiful.
Yeah, that's really something
you should probably keep to yourself.
I think you get on some sort of government list
or something.
That guy is too into these movies.
I would love to have a tiny Tom Cruise.
Yeah, but that was the twist,
is that she joined the franchise with Fallout.
And I always just bring up Ghost Protocol because it's my favorite title.
Is that the one where Henry Cavill loads his arms?
That's Fallout.
Oh, see?
There you go.
There you go.
Ghost Protocol is the one where he puts his hood up and sunglasses.
And that's because he's following Ghost Protocol.
Like, is that Tom Cruise?
I don't know.
It looks like a ghost to me.
Isn't that Unabomber Protocol?
Well, they're not going to put that in a movie title.
Sam, that would be ridiculous.
All right.
Kurt, how are you feeling about this game?
Oh, man, I want to apologize to Juan up front.
You're losing, buddy.
I'm into it. I'm very bad with it. man, I want to apologize to Juan up front. You're losing, buddy.
I'm into it.
I'm very bad with... Trivia in general, it's surprising that I've been on this show
before. Kurt, this game doesn't matter.
Alright, great. Oh, this is a warm-up game.
It's because it's Anthony Vass.
It doesn't matter or the game.
The game.
No, it's because you got a point.
Yeah, Sam, be careful what you're dismissive of.
Dammit, Levine.
We love Mission Impossible.
I don't know if we really, really like it.
Each one individually.
If they're so impossible, though, how come...
He keeps doing them.
Yeah.
He succeeds.
You take two or three in, he would die, and they go,
well, shit, he was trying to do something that was impossible.
I think they mean improbable.
Did you know you could find out exactly
how tall Tom Cruise is in Mission Impossible 3?
Well, how?
There's a scene in Mission Impossible 3
where he's running through rural Shanghai,
and there are older Asian people towering over him.
You're just like, what the fuck is happening?
They are towering over him.
That is inaccurate on behalf of short men.
You know Todd Cruz was like,
I need 35 apple boxes on this street.
You're right.
He wears lifts in his shoes,
so it's even worse than that.
He runs.
Well, we up here thought that was funny.
Anyway, let's move on.
In movies where he's running,
he's on a hoverboard.
It's like five feet off the ground. Those little bitty legs just... Anyway, let's move on. In movies where he's running, he's on a hoverboard.
It's like five feet off the ground. She knows little bitty legs just...
Kurt, did Angela Bassett do or not do this thing?
P.S. I love you.
She does the thing.
She does the thing in P.S. I love you?
Yes. That is incorrect. She does the thing. She does the thing in P.S. I love you? Yes.
That is incorrect.
That's not her.
That's Gerard Butler, silly.
She didn't do that thing.
Yeah, it was Gerard Butler.
How the fuck did you do that?
You're probably thinking of...
I don't even know what P.S. I love you is.
I've never even heard of that movie.
It was Hilary Swank's husband, Gerard Butler, dies.
And that's what he writes in his suicide note.
P.S.
No, it's...
P.S.
This is Sparta.
I'm still trying to figure
out the correlation
between Angela Beth
and Richard Rodman.
P.S.
Get to Greenland.
P.S.
This is Sparta.
He picks her into a ditch.
P.S.
I love you here.
Yeah, people have seen it.
It's a movie, Kurt.
It stars Hillary Swank.
Raise your hand
if you've seen P.S.
I love you. Yeah, unfortunately, yeah. One person! Two Swank. Raise your hand if you've seen P.S. I Love You.
Yeah, unfortunately, yeah.
One person.
Two.
Kurt, turn around.
People love a rom-com.
Kathy Bates is in it.
Hilary Swank.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Anyway.
Classics.
It sounds like a classic.
Nice try, Kurt.
Can't wait to see it.
I didn't pick it because I thought you'd know it.
All right. We're back to Sam. see it. I didn't pick it because I thought you'd know it. Alright.
We're back to Sam.
The motion picture is
Kindergarten Cop.
She did
the thing. She didn't do the thing.
Angela Bassett did not do the thing
in Kindergarten Cop. She did do
the thing in Kindergarten Cop. What?
What did she play? She's stewardess
in Kindergarten Cop. But did she the thing in kindergarten. What? What does she play? She's stewardess in kindergarten
comp. But did she
like nail it as a stewardess?
I would think she did because then she's been
in stuff ever since.
You know, she seems
to be doing alright.
Well, I mean, so we're choosing extra
roles now is what we're doing.
No, just whether she did.
She's got stewardess
in the credit.
It doesn't even say uncredited
like it does for a lot of people.
Who's even on a plane in that movie?
Arnold Schwarzenegger and McGregor.
He has to get to...
So she probably says, hey, do you want some coffee?
And Arnold probably says,
I'll push you out of this plane.
Wow.
Because he's always threatening everybody
in those movies.
Especially the children.
Okay, so congratulations.
I came up with a question
Sam didn't know the answer to.
Good one, Doug.
It's back to Nick.
Are you ready?
Critters 4.
Critters 4. Yeah. Critters 4.
Yeah, they made a lot of Critters movies, apparently.
I'm going to cheat by watching Jay's body language.
Hold on.
And Critters 4.
That's not my question, so it doesn't matter.
Did she or did she not do the thing?
Come on.
In Critters 4, Nick.
He's really poker.
He's poker facing you.
He has nice eyes.
Anyway, we're going to.
What are his eyes telling you?
I don't know.
No, she didn't do the thing.
She what?
She didn't do the thing.
She didn't do the thing?
I'm sorry, but she did do the thing.
Yeah, let's move it a little.
And just for Sam,
they gave her a bump up.
They gave her a character name.
She's called Fran.
See, I would have known that.
She's called Fran in the movie.
No, I would not.
But it does seem a little, it happened a little later in her career to be in a Critters movie.
That's why I didn't get it.
She must have been doing somebody a favor.
All right.
Here we go.
We're over to Jay.
And the next movie is a film called Strange Days.
What in the whole entire fuck?
I think I know this one.
I don't.
Yeah, let me look at your eyes now.
You guys, are you here to play trivia or fall in love?
Hey, look, I'm just.
Can it be both, Doug?
It can.
It can. They're not musically exclusive.
Angela Bassett
did not do the thing
in Strange Days.
Oh, dude. Yes, she did.
She's the female lead!
Why would I help you? This is a competition.
Yeah, she starred in it.
It was directed by Catherine Bigelow,
and she's almost equal billing and role with Ralph Fiennes.
And the late, great Tom Sizemore.
Oh, yeah.
Tom Sizemore, rest in peace.
I got confused with the Doors documentary,
so I was way off there.
Oops.
There you go.
There you have it.
All right, so this is such an exciting conclusion to this game
because Jay and Sam are the only people on the board here.
Okay.
Right?
I'm ready.
And whose turn was next?
It was supposed to be Kurt next, but you're not in this anymore, Kurt.
Oh, I'm already out.
You're out for now.
You'll be back soon and stronger and better than ever.
I can stop stretching.
And, yeah.
Go do some warm up
throws.
Keep your arm warm.
But I'm going to ask Sam Levine
one final
question in the Angela Bassett
did the thing game.
If you get it right, you
win this game.
Can I tell you her character's name from Strange Days?
And if you get it wrong, Jay is the winner.
Okay.
Wait a minute.
What?
If you miss this, it's to break the tie.
If you miss it, Jay wins because you guys are tied.
That seems fair.
Okay.
Yeah.
If you get it right, you win.
How about, okay.
All you got to do is get it right.
All right.
I hope it's a movie.
She's a female lead-in.
Well, we'll see. I guess so see She might not be in it at all
Yeah could go either way
Wouldn't they be tied if he gets it wrong?
What's that?
No it's okay Doug's aware
They'd still be tied
But we gotta end this game somehow
And a coin flip just doesn't seem like
Like Sam would appreciate that
Actually would You'd prefer a coin flip just doesn't seem like Sam would appreciate that. I actually would.
You'd prefer a coin flip?
Sure.
Here we go.
Sorry, I'm out of change.
All right.
Bumblebee.
The motion picture Bumblebee.
Sam Levine.
My favorite.
Angela Bassett.
Did she or did she not do the thing Bumblebee?
She did the thing?
That is correct.
She did do the thing.
She is the voice of
Shudder, one of the
Decepticons
in freaking Bumblebee.
I was actually hoping for the Angela Batson movie.
I'm in with it. I was like, if that could come up, I'd be
cheap plug. I was like, that would have been a whole lot
better. What one is that?
Chirac.
Chirac, yeah.
Everybody go watch that. No no you don't have to it just seven years eight years too late it's okay if you ain't watched it by now
you just ain't missin shit it was just Amazon's first movie you know what they
did but it's okay I want to thank this give it up for the $7 check I just got. It's okay. It's all right. Well, congratulations, Sam Levine.
You won that game.
Yay!
You know what that means.
Me and Sam gets to go first in our final game today.
Yes, and we will play after this break.
We'll be right back.
We're back!
Oh, we had so much fun during that break.
That was really fun,
passing out donuts and popping balloons.
And Kurt's butt's never going to be the same.
You're damn right.
No one will know what that means on the podcast
The story of the ass of Braun Oler
It couldn't pop a balloon
He tried
And failed
I just had to do the voice
I thought there was
I wasn't paying attention
Because I don't like to pay attention to trailers
I don't like him pay attention to trailers.
I don't like them spoiling everything for me.
All right.
We're going to play our final game of the day that's going to determine which audience member gets to go home with this cool Last of Us safety kit
and also the rest of the donuts
and a Mary Lou Retton album.
And some grenadine.
And a book.
A children's book.
And a nightmare book.
It's not for children.
No, don't let a child see it.
A book of a nightmare.
Fuck!
I mean, The Sharing Bush, that is really an inspirational title.
The game we're going to play is something I call Super Last Person Standing.
Yay.
This is a game where everybody on stage, including myself,
takes turns naming movies that a particular person was in.
And if you can't think of one, you're out. But you can go to the person that you're playing for in the audience.
You can go to them one time for help to try to make yourself last one round longer.
Yeah.
Juan.
And, you know, I say, you know, go to your lifeline early.
I don't have a choice.
That's my advice.
But a lot of people wait until they're completely out of titles.
And since it's super last-person-standing,
it's not going to be just the films of one actor.
It's going to be the films of three or four actors.
Okay.
Three-point point something actors.
Does this make it easier or harder?
Probably easier.
All right.
Should make it easier, but it's still going to be a tough one
because this is the Banshees edition.
I think my prediction for last night is that the Banshees
and Sharon's going to win best picture.
And everything everywhere all at once will win best director for the Daniels.
That's the split that I'm predicting is going to happen.
But today...
Whisper it.
Don't tell anybody.
Yeah, it's our little secret.
Please do not share this information
that I got from just my own brain.
I just made it up,
but that's how I'm feeling it's going to go
because people really, in the Academy,
from what I've heard,
there's a lot of love for both of those movies,
so why not split it up?
Sam's making a face
tell us tell us tell the listeners about your face sam well uh it's the face of a
nearly 41 year old man uh you look great thank you so much uh i uh no i was just uh i was just
listening to you what do you think then will win the screenplay for those if they split?
What do you mean?
Well, you said one would win Best Picture,
one would win Banshee's Best Picture. Right, they're both up for original screenplay?
I do believe so.
Yeah, that's a tough call.
I'm not here to make that prediction.
I see.
Okay.
I just made that one prediction.
You made a face like it was wrong.
No, no, no, no.
I'll try not to look at your face anymore, Sam.
You're the one who asked me to sit so close to you.
I'll try not to look at those social cues
called your face.
You can't see my face all the way over there.
That's why I don't say shit to Kurt
because I can't tell what faces he's making.
Your faces are close
and they're judging
me. He seems to be
smiling and enjoying everything.
But he's further away. It's true.
Who did I say is going to start?
Oh, you are, Sam. What are we doing?
Oh.
It's the Banshees edition. So it's
the films of Brendan Gleeson,
Colin Farrell,
Barry Keoghan, or Carrie Condon.
Oh, Lord.
And Carrie Condon, to the best of my knowledge, is not in, you know, I don't know any movies she's in, but she probably is in some.
Most people know her from Better Call Saul, where she's terrific.
I have a question, Doug.
Yes, Sam.
Given that you knew the actors
we were going to be playing in the game with,
you still think it's fair for you to play?
Yeah, that's the idea,
is that I'm a spoiler
and I can throw in titles
that other people might have thought of
or might not have thought of.
Okay, sounds good.
Yeah.
Can you say them again?
It's true, though.
Would you guys just give me Banshees?
No, I'm taking Banshees as my right for winning the last two games. No, but you should just be Banshees. Can you say them again? It's true, though. Would you guys just give me Banshees? No, I'm taking Banshees as my right for winning the last two games.
I'm starting.
Can you say the actors?
The actors are Brandon Gleeson.
Colin Farrell.
I mean, Colin Farrell alone is like 40 titles are dancing around in your heads.
Yeah, of course.
Yeah.
And then Barry Keoghan, who I'm just excited to say his name out loud because I've been hearing it lately at award shows.
And I've always wondered if you really go up and down like that, if you really go Keoghan.
Keoghan.
Or if it's just Keoghan.
Yeah.
Is he the young drunk man?
Yeah, he's the little weird guy.
He plays the weird guy whenever he's in a movie.
Yes, every time.
He's the weird guy.
We have a question for Mr. Jay Washington.
I'm just going to ask it.
You couldn't pick a movie with at least one black person in it
that would have gave me a shot because I have no fucking hope in it.
In fairness to Doug, if there were a black person in the Banshees of Inishire.
That would be the whole story.
I don't know how they explain that.
Civil War Ireland.
Yeah, I know, right?
They'd be like, wow, how'd you get here?
What are you doing here?
That'd be the story.
That is the story.
This is a whole movie.
How did this guy get here?
What are you doing here?
They would stop fighting amongst themselves
and be like, hey.
So to my lifeline, to Danny,
let me tell you,
I'm coming to UConn early.
I know I only got once,
but I'm going to use it quickly.
Fuck! All right, let's go. I mean, you got once, but I'm going to use it quickly. Fuck!
Alright, let's go.
I mean, you didn't see all these white guys complaining
about the Angela Bassett game.
Touche.
Touche. Touche.
I mean, technically speaking, they couldn't.
What are we going to say? Like, hey,
I really resent having to play
this black lady how dare you
I would have really wanted to hear them say it on this recording
we did a whole segment
of the game but we edited it out cause
the guests they got objective
we're like that's not fair
what are we going to say
you brought up Critters 4
for Angela Bassett they were okay
okay
you brought up Critters 4 for Angela Bass. They were okay. Okay.
You brought up Critters 4.
That's okay.
Sam?
The Banshees of Inishirin.
All right.
Right out of the gate.
He's, you know, cheating.
Yep.
By saying the most obvious title of a movie that those people are in.
Let me double check.
Yes, they're all in it.
Okay.
And congratulations.
They all have to be in the same movie?
Any of them.
No, I was just joking around. I was just continuing with the premise.
I don't even know if that's possible beyond the one.
I don't think they have all been.
Nick?
So any of those.
Any of those actors, just a movie that they're in.
Could even be one where there are more than one of them,
but I don't know how many of those there are.
I do kind of know.
Minority Report.
Yeah, very good.
Now we go to Jay Washington.
The Killing of a Sacred Deer.
Starring both.
And Barry Keoghan.
And Barry Keoghan. They're both in there.
Alright, hang on a second, Kurt.
We're going to get a little chatter
in the audience. Be careful not to
say any of the
hundreds of films
that are potential answers at this
time. Yeah, shut up, Dad.
I wasn't
naming anybody in particular.
Kurt? In Bruges. In Bruges with both Colin Farrell and I wasn't naming anybody in particular. Kurt.
In Bruges.
In Bruges with both Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson.
He's the director, right?
No.
Who's the guy?
Yeah, Martin McDonough.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There you go.
How about that?
Yeah, he's great.
Yay, you did that, Nick.
I didn't know the name of him.
You didn't know that.
That's pretty exciting.
Okay, so I'm'm gonna go with classic Colin Farrell role
his first I think it's where he began getting addicted to wearing prosthetic
makeup and appearing to be normal or ugly as most picture called Horrible Bosses. Ooh.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, he's like
bald and
got a belly
and
yeah.
He's into it.
Yeah.
He's into
not being handsome.
Yep.
Tired of that
whole handsome.
I'll do that one thing.
Just handing it to him
on a silver platter.
Just hand it to him.
Go ahead and say it, Sam.
The Batman.
Because it's also got Barry Coegan as the Joker.
He shows up at the end as the Joker.
It's true.
Yeah, very good.
Very, very deep.
It's very nice of you to lay up that one really nice.
I was going to say it as soon as I finished saying my last title.
It has nothing to do with what was going on here.
It's very sweet.
Still thinking, Nick.
Horrible losses, too.
What?
Is there a subtitle?
No, there's no...
He dies in the first one.
I didn't see that.
Well, you're out.
Jay, you misled me.
But this is just like on Jeopardy!
when they don't phrase it as a question in the first round.
We'll let you do another answer because it's too soon to be.
You know, you should have gone to your lifeline.
I'm not winning anyway, folks.
It's going to be fine.
But do you have anything else?
No, I do.
Okay, yeah.
He's got others.
I threw you off with that horrible bosses one comment.
He's a trigger.
He's Doug Benson.
I fucked you.
How about Daredevil with him as Bullseye?
Damn it, that's what I was going to say. Yeah. Yeah. Bullseye and Daredevil with him as Bullseye? Damn it, that's what I was going to say.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Bullseye and Daredevil.
Not the awesome TV show, the not so good movie.
It's got its charms.
Eternals.
Eternals, yes.
Very good.
Three Billboards.
Which, where are they?
In Midland Island.
Is that it again? I I know that one yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah is kind of what the real thing sounds like. I mean, that's, you know, people ask for you know, nobody really wants to admit they're going
to that racist town, so they
have to say it. That's exactly how
they say it.
What's the town that's...
So yeah, switch to something
that you do know the title.
Or go,
it's a good time to go to your lifeline if you want to
get a little help there. But don't
say the name of that one, because it'll come to you.
I can't ask him?
You can.
No, it will not come to me.
It might.
I'll use it.
Don't say it.
All I can hear now is Hannah Montana and Billings Montana.
All right.
Well, at least you're taking it away from one of them if you have your lifeline say it.
Give it to me.
Well, let's see if your lifeline knows it.
Juan, do you know the name of that movie?
Yeah.
What is it?
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri.
Ebbing, Missouri. It's Ebbing,
Missouri? Ebbing, Missouri.
I told you it sounded exactly like those noises you make.
That's all we all agree.
I really thought it was Montana.
Oh my God. I had no idea
it was Missouri.
Yeah, don't paint Montana
with that racist brush.
Yeah, no, not Montana.
Out of all the places.
The least racist of all of the states.
There's nobody there.
There's no people there.
How can you be racist when there's no people?
The less people, the more racist the whites.
Yeah, that's probably a good point.
I bet there's a correlation somewhere.
That's probably true.
Somewhere is a graph that says that that's kind of not really.
I need the flow chart to show this, sir.
Thank you.
Yeah, because we all know big populations.
Nothing goes wrong.
Come on, Doug.
Give us the next one.
Okay, let's go from three billboards to seven psychopaths.
Yes.
That's such a fun movie.
It is.
As long as we're keeping it in the number family.
How about 28 Days Later?
28 Days Later with Brendan Gleeson.
Very nice.
That guy's in a lot of movies.
We haven't done too many of his yet.
I got like two more.
There's somebody whistling in the audience.
Yeah, it's dead.
Alexander.
How's that? What? Alexander. Who's in that? Colin Farrell is Alexander. audience. Yeah, it's dead. Alexander. How's that?
What?
Alexander.
Who's in that?
Colin Farrell is Alexander.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
With Angelina Jolie and a big elephant.
As his mom that he's weirdly weird with.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, if she was your mom.
Let's not go there.
Okay.
Jay?
The worst remake possible, Total Recall.
Oh, yeah.
That was not a good one.
I forgot most of it.
I missed the...
That's my Colin Farrell impression.
You used your lifeline
This is so upsetting
You've had a chance to think
I think Colin Farrell
Colin Farrell gets coffee near us
all the time and so my wife sees him a lot
and talks about him a lot
and the fact that I can't name another movie
that he's in is going to be
but she doesn't listen to podcasts so that's fine
Okay
I'm going to
say...
I know I'm wrong.
Don't say it if you know you're wrong.
Because I don't have another idea.
Really? You're just out of ideas?
I'm out of ideas already.
Interesting.
I'm sorry, everybody.
I don't remember names or movies.
But Michael Clayton...
Is a movie.
Yeah.
Let's get back to the person's name.
The guy who has the mental breakdown,
he's not that guy.
He's a different guy.
But he looks like that guy.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
The guy he looks like?
The guy who's having the mental breakdown.
Sam thinks he knows.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
Sam, who is he?
He doesn't want to play.
No, you can tell him.
What's the name of that actor?
We all know he's not that...
Tom...
Jesus.
Tom Jesus.
Tom Jesus.
Tom Jesus.
He's British.
Tom from In the Bedroom.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tom in the Bedroom.
Tom from the Bedroom.
He got nominated for... Cruise. Tomroom. Yeah, yeah, yeah. From In the Bedroom. Tom from the Bedroom. He got nominated for that one. Tom Cruise.
Yeah.
But I know you're talking about it too.
I think I've gone out first on this game every time.
Yay!
Let's hear it for Kurt Braunohler, everybody.
You sure fucked up that balloon, though.
Let me tell you.
Thank you so much.
It definitely popped eventually.
It definitely did eventually.
You made it. A win is a win. Let me tell you. Thank you so much. It definitely popped eventually. It definitely did eventually.
You made it.
A win is a win.
Thank you.
Okay.
I'm going to say the lobster.
Damn it, dog.
Fuck.
Oh, sorry.
I'm going to say the recruit.
Okay.
This is it.
Oh, shit.
Oh, maybe you helped him think of something.
Nick, how are you doing?
I think this is a... Should I do a lifeline before I guess?
Yeah, you don't want to guess wrong at this point.
All right, so, Dad, what do you got?
Brendan Gleeson, Barry Keegan, and Colin Farrell.
I whistled at you for every answer,
and now you're calling. Yeah, do you not know any more now whistled at you for every answer, and now you're calling.
Yeah, do you not know it anymore now?
He wants you to do it now. Oh, you're done.
Oh, now he's out. Now he doesn't have anymore.
Well, I mean, I got it right a couple times. Nice job, Nick.
I had the lobster right here. He had the lobster
ready to go. But I knew movies up until that point.
I fucked that up.
Yeah. Okay.
Alright, so you got a guess now uh uh i want to say
it's harry potter and the goblet of fire wow that's a good pool because he's in some of them
not all of them right he's on the early ones let me let me look at this for a mad eye mooney yeah
goblet of fire is the first appearance of Mad-Eye Mooney.
Oh, it's the first?
Oh, thank fuck.
In the Harry Potter series.
Congratulations.
It's got that eye.
Yeah.
Now there's only one after Goblet of Fire opened to you.
What's that?
What?
Nothing?
Name any of the 12 after that.
All right.
Kurt, you're not in this anymore.
I'm into it now.
You kid.
He's a saboteur.
Yeah, you're a real little mixer over there. I am. I'm a real troublemaker. I'm into it now. You kid. He's a saboteur. Yeah, you're a real little mixer
over there. Real troublemaker.
Pulled mine out.
Big gremlin. Swat.
Swat. Nice.
Oh, I got another one. Yes!
Another TV
show turned movie starring Colin
Farrell.
Sam is next after me.
Just warning you, Sam, to be ready.
I'm going to go with the guard.
Take that.
Yeah.
Brandon Gleason and Don Cheadle
cool
go Sam
Dunkirk
yes
Barry Keoghan
back to you Nick
phone booth
yes
freaking phone booth
phone booth
is that the
Kiefer Sutherland's voice
no
for a million points
no
who was the
original voice who was the original voice?
Who was the original phone booth?
Before Kiefer got recast.
Kiefer Sutherland, that was a recasting after the movie had been shot.
Oh, okay.
Because originally who was it?
It was Ron Eldard.
Ron Eldard, interesting.
Nobody knows his name.
That is a man.
That's a name.
You guys would recognize him.
Oh, yeah.
He was on ER for a while.
Okay.
Whose turn is it?
Jay?
Hey, Danny.
How you doing?
Oh, Lifeline.
Danny.
Miami Vice.
Thank you.
Miami Vice.
Another TV.
He likes doing those TV show movies.
Yeah, that's crazy.
You want to just throw me back in, buddy?
No.
Why? Did you think of another one?
No, I got none, bud.
Oh, okay.
There's some big obvious ones coming up.
Yeah, there's some real...
We're going to run through them.
There's some real good ones.
Yeah, Harry Potter and the Barkers of Windows.
The what?
The what?
Not that any of those titles are also weird.
Let's just wrap up
the Barry Keoghan
with The Green Knight.
Oh.
Yeah.
Does he play the Green Knight?
No, he plays a guy
who annoys the Green Knight
for a while.
Blue Knight?
And seems mysterious
like every movie he's in.
Well, the Green Knight's
the tree guy, right?
Is he?
Yeah, it's not
Dev Patel. Jinx. Wilkinson. Tom Wilkinson. like every movie he's in. Well, the Green Knight's the tree guy, right? Is he? Yeah, it's not. Oh, it's not.
It's not Dev Patel.
Yeah.
Jinx.
Wilkinson.
Tom Wilkinson.
Thank you so much.
Nice.
That guy's great, too.
I love Tom Wilkinson.
He's good.
We do one with Tom Wilkinson next time.
Yeah, he was in a couple of those Batmans.
Okay, where are we at?
I think it's on me.
Do it, Sam.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1.
Yes.
That is correct.
Aren't you out?
Nice little golf applause for that.
Weirdly, no.
Nick is still in it to win it.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2.
Is that real?
Part 2?
Yes, it is.
No, I mean,
is that really your answer?
No, stop.
Don't do that.
I've heard this show before.
Yeah.
You mind game.
Do you want to stay with that?
Now that you said that,
I don't know.
Do you want to change it?
Yes.
What would you like to change it to?
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.
That is correct.
That was the one I literally was about to pick.
That is correct.
Shit.
Should I feel proud that I'm getting by with hints from the host?
Shit.
Jay?
Is he not in the final one?
What's that?
Why wouldn't he be?
Maybe he dies.
I don't know.
Yeah.
Well, fuck it.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2.
No.
Hey, look.
I knew I was going out here.
Look, by all rights, that should have been me.
Yeah, that should have been you.
Because I was going to order the Phoenix.
I'm sorry.
It should have been exactly reversed.
Yeah.
Well, you know what?
It's been real.
Thank y'all.
All right.
Yeah.
Sorry.
You don't have to leave or anything.
You can stay just like Kurt has. You can just keep talking. Yeah. Okay, You don't have to leave or anything. You can stay just like Kurt has.
You can just keep talking.
Yeah.
Okay, cool.
Keep talking all you want.
Doug saw me flailing in the wind.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Real life, right?
Yeah.
Here's a good, since it's my turn, here's a favorite of mine from Brandon Gleason.
Lake Placid.
Wow.
Yeah.
He's terrific in that.
He's a good woman.
Betty White in that fucking movie. Yeah, yeah. That's a good one. Sam? A. Wow. Yeah. He's terrific in that. Bill Pullman and Betty White in that fucking movie.
Yeah, yeah.
That's a good one.
Sam?
AI.
Yes.
Artificial intelligentsia.
It's true.
That's a great one.
Yeah.
Okay.
Nick?
I'm probably getting this confused with Brian Cox, but...
Who doesn't?
No, that's not...
No.
It's not a good thing
that I'm doing this
let's do
come on
I gotta have another
Colin Farrelly
he's fucking
in a lot of stuff
right
he's in so many things
yeah
it's ridiculous
but the show's
getting dead
so I gotta go
no
you gotta do it
okay
spit it out
supremacy
what
who's in that
probably Brian Cox oh yeah probably he's in that? Probably Brian Cox.
Oh, yeah.
Probably.
He's nodding.
It's Brian Cox.
Yeah.
Oh, instead of Brendan Gleeson.
Yeah.
I see.
They both have gravitas.
Yeah, they have very similar gravitas.
And totally different accents.
Anyway.
It's true.
Yeah, that's where they really go different ways.
I thought he was one of the CAA guys.
We can wrap this up.
No, it's all good. I was on borrowed time since Jay took that from me. Right, yeah. really go I thought he was one of the CAA guys we can wrap this up yeah no I
was on borrowed time since Jay took that
for me so right yeah it's been tough and
but I admire how you've done and
everybody they nailed you nailed all the
titles that I you know jotted down ahead
of time Sam want to do one more sure
Carrie Condon unle Unleashed.
Oh, nice!
A.K.A. Danny the Dog.
Went with Cary Condon on that last one.
That's Jet Li.
Jet Li and Bob Hoskins. What is that? That's a movie?
Yeah. Jet Li wears like a bondage
collar and when he takes it off he fights a lot.
I swear to God. Yeah.
It's called Cary Condon Unleashed?
It's not like a stand-up special. It's like a movie called Unleashed? No, no. It's not like a stand-up special.
It's like a movie called Unleashed.
She's the actress that's in the movie.
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
Okay, so the movie's called Unleashed.
I said you could name movies that she was in,
but Sam's the only nerd up here who knew one of her movies.
Well, that's only because I don't know faces' names.
I know faces.
Yeah.
And then for Colin Farrell, we forgot A Winter's Tale, I think, is something he's in.
That thing where Will Smith plays the devil.
And then Saving Mr. Banks, the Disney story.
And, yeah.
What else did we miss?
We did it.
Tigerland.
Yeah.
Tigerland?
Wait, can I ask Sam?
Oh, yeah.
And what's that after Yang?
I think he's in that.
Did you know it wasn't Deathly Hallows 2?
Did you know he doesn't continue on?
I did.
Yeah.
Fuck.
So good.
It's crazy.
I was looking him up today.
I thought he started in...
It's like I'm fighting Tyson up here.
Jesus.
I thought his character started in Azkaban,
but he doesn't start until Goblin of Fire.
Yeah, that was a random guess, too.
Order of Phoenix.
Could have been out right there.
Well, terrific job.
Nice job, everybody.
But Sam Levine is our winner today.
Thank you.
As always.
Sam, go ahead and do your plugs first.
Oh, hey, I'm on Cameo, folks.
That's right.
It's St. Patrick's Day coming up.
And who doesn't love to send their friends a St. Patrick's Day cameo, folks. That's right. It's St. Patrick's Day coming up. And who doesn't love to send their friends
a St. Patrick's Day cameo from
me, noted alcoholic
Sam LeVue.
Jesus.
You'll get drunk on their behalf?
100%. I will do a
drunk cameo 100%
if that's the request. If that's what they want from you.
Yeah. Get those
requests in, everybody.
March 17th
is going to be here before you know it.
It always sucks to have to get last minute
St. Patrick's gifts.
Nick Simmons,
great job, first time guest.
You were fantastic.
Except it's love.
He's like, you took this from me. Except it's love. He's like, you took this from me.
Except it's love.
What would you like to plug?
I would like to plug Kurt Brunner's special
that he said at the beginning of the show.
Perfectly stupid.
No, no, I've been releasing music,
but it's under a different name,
and no one knows it's me,
and I'm not ready to release it yet,
but maybe I'll come back someday.
Okay, let's just skip you. Let's not have you say anything. It's under a secret name, but there's a's me and I'm not ready to release it yet but maybe I'll come back someday. Let's just skip you.
Let's not have you
say anything.
It's under a secret name
but there's a little tease
for you.
Yeah, okay.
Look for something
you can't find, everybody.
Duke Silvers?
He's really sneaky.
I'm the other guy
in Daft Punk.
Great A reference.
At home listeners,
tweet, let me know
you got that one.
Yeah, I got it.
Okay, thanks, dude.
I'm hoping Nick Offerman is going to be
he might be a guest on
next month's episode
I will be the audience then
maybe yeah I'll let you know
Jay Washington
yeah check out American Jiggalo
on Showtime I'm in that show
Black Boy Content Club
podcast me Moses Prim
and Chris Burns.
As well as the Mad Titan podcast
where I talk about all the Marvel and DC TV shows
and movies. Yeah, big ass
nerd. And please follow me on TikTok
so I can have followers so I can keep getting work.
Because clearly you need TikTok followers
to get jobs nowadays.
What the fuck?
So, at Mr. J. Washington. That's that.
Right on. Thanks, Jay.
Kurt Gronholm, the special's called He's the Stupid.
It's called Perfectly Stupid.
It's on YouTube.
You can check it out for free.
And my podcast, Bananas.
It's all strange news and personal stories.
You're going to love it.
Get into that.
And that's it, baby.
Yeah, bananas are good for you right a lot of potassium
in your podcast i love it that's uh we make all that joke all the time i'm doing
i'm doing five stand-up shows at the comedy connection in providence rhode island april 20
through 22 and all of my dates and dates are at
doglovesmovies.com
so yeah
I know they're trying to
do you want to lead it Nick
that's doglovesmovies.com
yay
caca
caca
wallet
to dancing
shhh I knew we wouldn't be good at it
I knew it wouldn't work out very well
But thank you for trying Nick
And thank you once again to all of my guests
Kurt Braunohler, Jay Washington
Nick Simmons
Sam Levine
As always
Get ready in the booth this is a short one As always, get ready in the booth. This is a short one.
As always, try me.
Now it's time for Doug to watch another talkie.
Eyes of gold, his viewing prowess makes him cocky.
There's no room in his heart for you
because Doug loves movies.