Doug Loves Movies - Paget Brewster, Brandon Collins, Mark Ellis and Matt Walsh guest

Episode Date: June 5, 2023

Live from Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles, Doug welcomes Paget Brewster, Brandon Collins, Mark Ellis and Matt Walsh to the show.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Doug hates candy wrappers, squeamish, sticky seeds With 50 azepop or kernels in his teeth There's still not one that he won't see Cause Doug loves movies Hey, hey, hey everybody My name is Doug, and I love movies. This is Doug Loves Movies. All right, that was good.

A little worried about the other one now, though. We'll see how that goes. At least there wasn't anybody just yelling out, Ah! We are back once again at Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles! Oh, boy. Let's see. It's Sunday, June 4th, 2023.

Kiggs, men, the golden circle of friends. And it's time for doug plugs this is where you chant doug plugs doug plugs doug plugs doug plugs doug plugs doug plugs doug plugs doug plugs doug plugs doug plugs i thought i could count on you los angeles are you all out on strike? Is that what happened? All right. I really thought I had everybody trained to chant when that part came up. I guess it's only the out-of-town rubes that like to do that. Douglas Movies is coming to you hereafter at the Crocodile in Seattle, the classic rock club. Oh, don't worry, that show's sold out.

Don't even worry about that one. But the night before, I'm doing stand-up in the same venue, the Hereafter, and there's still a few seats left for that, so come on out to that. It's dead, Seattle. And Douglas Movies is back at Comic-Con in San Diego on Wednesday, July 19th

at the American Comedy Cacaco. Comedy Cacaco. They should add that in there. I think that would be smart. For all of my dates and deets and links, go to DouglasMovies.com. That's DouglasMovies.com! Yeah!

It ends there, so close, movies.com! Yeah! It ends there? So like, where it ended like five years ago? What about caca? What about Ted Danson? What about shhh? What about wallet? Holy shit! Do you all smoke as much weed as I do? Is that? I thought so.

I thought so. But also schedules change. Things we've memorized changes. It's all, you know, you can't. You just got to keep moving. But boy, do I have a fun prize box. It's not a bag today. It's a box.

And it says Lumen loves you on it. It was sent to me to promote the television program Severance. So it has a bunch of things that the company Lumen would send to their employees. So it's a bunch of crap. It's a bunch of crappy things that say Lumen on there. There's a framed picture of Adam Scott and other cast members. But then I also threw in, I just had laying around from some box I got sent, a cashmere blanket. So I thought that'd be a nice addition. But you know, it's

like a coffee mug that says Lumen loves you, and there's the framed picture. Yeah, it's like a coffee mug that says, Lumen loves you. And there's the framed picture. Yeah, it's a bit of a letdown. The box is really the most exciting part. But yeah, so somebody today is going to win this severance package. You got it. People got it. All right. Let's get my guests out here. Are you ready to meet the guests? Please welcome Padgett Brewster, Brandon Collins, Mark Ellis, and Matt Walsh. Grab a seat and a microphone.

It is cold out here. A little nippy. That's how you keep everybody alert and excited. All the best game shows and comedy shows are very cold. They're very cold places

that invite warm waves of laughter. Let's meet my guests individually and alphabetically by first name. Yeah, the twist started already. Already you don't know where the hell this thing is going. Ladies and gentlemen, he is a frequent guest on the show

and is an East Coaster threatening to go back soon, so I had to have him on the show here at Dynasty Time Runner. Give it up, everybody, for Brandon Collins. Hey. Good to be back. Yeah. That's fun. My last show before I go back East.

This is it. Yeah. All right, good. I got you on the very last opportunity, so it's good to have you here. He's been saying that for seven years, Doug. Every time he does a show, he says, this is my last show before I go back east.

God damn it, you're not supposed to give away the strategy. Well, there's a lot of strategy and intimidation going on here today because I was already telling everybody backstage, Brandon, about that you have a movie podcast. I do. And that always terrifies everybody. But tell them what specifically your movie podcast

is about. Maybe they'll feel better about competing with you. Yeah, it's called Medium Popcorn. It's just me and my best friend, Justin.

We just talk about movies that we watched, new or old. And we tell people whether or not to go see it or waste your money on it and shit.

That's it. It's nothing serious. I'm not being philosophical about the movies. I'm not breaking it. But you've probably seen a lot of movies. But you don't know a lot of trivia about them necessarily, right? Yeah, I mean, I do. But don't be scared.

I'm just like you guys. It's all a tactic, Doug. Right. He's getting into my head already. He's the one to watch. He's the what? Yeah. No, I don't know how to play head games.

Former trivia master. Yeah. Trivia master is a very strong word. It's two words. I prefer host or clown. There. You don't want master in your title? No.

No. All right, let me get to your intro. I'm from Virginia. No, thank you. Let me do your intro before you keep talking more. Thank you. Let's bring you into this. Just get everybody warmed up.

Yeah, yeah. No, you're doing great, and I think you're the perfect replacement when Jon Hamm cancels. Ladies and gentlemen, it's Mark Ellis. Good to be here off the bench, Doug. Thanks for calling me up. Back to the big leagues.

I just thought you'd be perfect because you're probably the number one fan I know of the Top Gun Maverick film, which Jon Hamm appears. Yes, he does. Watched it last night. I did. Just because you knew you were going to see Jon Hamm today? I mean, I was told Jon Hamm was going to make an appearance. I didn't realize that I was stepping in for Jon Hamm or else I would have had scotch with

lunch today. I did. I got home late from, I was at the comedy store last night late and I got home and usually what I do is I put on one of two items with the dog and I have a couple beers and then I go to bed on Saturday night. It's either the last dance documentary or Top Gun Maverick. So

any ladies out there want to know? Single. I don't know how it happened either. You have so much time on your hands to watch either one of those. Yeah, I got a lot of free time, Brando. Yeah, and they're both things that are kind of spoiled by knowing the ending already.

You know what I mean? They're real ending-driven sports and It's not the destination, Doug. It's the journey. The journey that Mav slash Michael Jordan took. Similar tactics. All right. If you say so

I'm sorry I'm not John Hamm God damn it I got a text at 3am last night Hey can you be here? Hamm's out I'm like Elvis is in God hamm it Green eggs and Ellis today baby

Green eggs and Ellis today, baby. Also joining us today is a man who, by my calculations, hasn't messed around with Twitter since sometime last year. It's Matt Walsh. Thank you, Doug. Full disclosure, some Russian robot hacked my account and I've been locked out. But I don't miss being on Twitter.

Right, you don't seem like it matters. It doesn't matter. Yeah. I empirically know it does not matter. It's a shit show out there. I thought you might have just got pushed off by too many Matt Walshes on the scene. Well, that's another nightmare.

There's some really opinionated Matt Walshes out there. There's one Matt Walsh I wish didn't exist. That's for sure. He's a nightmare. But yes, I'm not on Twitter, so I guess I'm not relevant to the culture. No, I just... I thought I was complimenting you,

but that's cool. Oh. Yeah. I took it defensively. No, no, you're off're off the twitter t that's good good thank you good for you and this is my final podcast ever so i can feel special like brandon i will never do another podcast i do say that every time i go on a podcast i did like seeing some of your last tweets from last fall before you got cut off because you because it just suddenly

you know ends around November and there's no more tweets. And amongst the last few are things like, so how is everybody? That's not me. That's not you? They already had it by then. I would never tweet that.

There were a couple. I thought you might tweet it like being funny. There were a few innocuous tweets like that. But after that, I think even the robot stopped tweeting. Or whoever has it. And because no one works at Twitter, I could never talk to a human being to try to get it back. I did try to get it back. Yeah.

But to no avail. All right. So don't go to at Mr. Matt Walsh. No. For all of your Matt Walsh avail. Alright. So don't go to at Mr. Matt Walsh for all of your Matt Walsh needs. No, don't go there. Do you do Instagram? I do Instagram.

What's your call on that? What's my what? What are you called on it? Oh, Mr. Matt Walsh. I still have Mr. Matt Walsh. Okay, MR. Matt Walsh. Yeah, I'm thinking of changing it to the good Matt Walsh so I'm not confused. Ooh, that's fun. To the bad Matt Walsh. I still have Mr. Matt Walsh. MR Matt Walsh. Yeah, I'm thinking of changing it to the good Matt Walsh, so I'm not confused. Ooh, that's fun.

To the bad Matt Walsh. Yeah. A fan of this very podcast called you that on Twitter. Did they? Mm-hmm. Okay. I feel like I'm bragging if I come out and say, I'm the good Matt Walsh. Maybe good's not the right word.

Yeah. Less evil. Less. I'm not the asshole, Matt Walsh. You still could be on the evil side a little bit. That's fun. Less evil. That's better.

All right. Speaking of less evil, our next guest. When our next guest isn't here you gotta hear your intro when our next guest isn't solving crimes she's upset about the crimes she didn't solve it's pageant Brewster everybody

that was great that was a great intro hi Doug right cause you can't leave the work at home sometimes sometimes you're like I can't believe we didn't solve that one. It's tough. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm sure the FBI feels that way all the time. The realies. Right? The realies. They really have to worry about it. They really have to catch people. They really have to worry about it. But things are good in general?

Yeah. All right. I mean, you know, the writers are on strike and I support the writers with this. Yeah, support the writers,

everybody. But I still, I still mostly watch TV, so I'm not the best guest to have on your podcast, but I enjoy you so much, I can't say no. Oh, okay.

I cannot say no to you. Well, that's fair. I like it. I should ask you to do something more interesting. Ah, shit. I like it. I should ask you to do something more interesting. Ah, shit. Something more provocative.

Can't say no. I'm thinking some things. So that's everybody. That's our panel. An amazing group of, yes. People that are here, ready and eager to compete but first yeah before we play games

oh that's a good dramatic pause one of us is gonna die that was a great like that'd be so fun to illuminate somebody before we start say bye-bye sashay away you took those glasses off that was even slower for all you listeners out there yeah even slower than the classic scientist telling earthlings that the aliens are going

to be here in two hours you know like? Like, the asteroid's coming. We can't stop it. Yeah, very Jurassic Park when they see the dinosaur for the first time. They really just can't get those glasses off, right? But, no, I took them off dramatically to set up this next segment that's called Recommendation Nation. People only applauded that because i gestured it was under duress

but it is fun for me to do this every episode with my guests and that's where i ask each one of you to recommend one movie from a very specific category. And, of course, everyone is talking about The Little Mermaid. Who saw The Little Mermaid? Yep. Whoa! I kind of had to, but yes, I did see it. Oh, wow. So he's really going to have an advantage because all the questions today are about Little Mermaid.

All right. I've been on the ride. Does that count for something? I had the book as a child. Are we talking about the 1989 version? I saw that one. Didn't see that one either. Right?

You didn't see the original Mermaid? The cartoon? The red-headed one? No, no. Wow. I've never, I had the book. It was a big deal as a child.

We didn't have a lot of books. But in 89. I don't need that movie Picture Mummy. I have a book. That's wild. So you're a snob about children's tales

that turn into movies. No, no, not at all. I can answer this question. Let's go, Doug. You thought this, when Little Mermaid came out, you thought it was for kids, and you'd outgrown it because you'd already done the book and moved on. Maybe, maybe I would. When did the first Little Mermaid come out?

Do you watch animated Disney movies? Yes. Yeah. I don't know how you missed this one. I'm holding on to my suggestion for an animated movie that I liked. Wow. Did you like Pinocchio? Yes, I don't know how you missed this one. I'm holding on to my suggestion for an animated movie that I liked. Wow. Did you like Pinocchio? Yes, I did.

Yes. That was the Guillermo del Toro. Oh, you're talking about the new one. Guillermo del Toro. I did see the one from Disney as well. Both stellar. And a very scary ride. I've been on that ride, too.

Very scary. Everything Matt knows about movies are from rides. The guy who captures them and puts them in cages. Very, whatever. Does the ride have Monstro in it? Monstro is very scary. Fuck that, man. I hate whales.

Scary, right? I don't do whales, man. No. I don't like it. man, no. Yeah. I don't like it. But it's so roomy inside. They just hang out until he coughs or something. Yeah.

I think they made a fire. Yeah, they had a great time inside the whale. That was bigger than my apartment. Like, they had a good time chilling inside Monstro. It looked like they were making s'mores and shit. Yeah. Like, they really have, like, a little campfire going on. They had furniture.

There was furniture in the had furniture There was furniture In the whale There was furniture There was fish I'm thinking of Bugs Bunny now I think Yeah I think I switched

To a different cartoon Oh A lot of cartoon characters End up in the whale In the belly of whales I think Elmer Fudd Met the belly of a whale A couple times

What? What? There's a lot of Cartoon characters who have stumbled into it. It's in the Bible. Read it. The first cartoon. The Bible. Jonah. We have the Bible.

Oh, does anybody have a favorite? This is a sidebar question. Does anybody have a favorite biblical movie? Because I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan of biblical movies, but I'd like to be told there is one out there that's enjoyable. I would probably go with two. Can we count Kirk Cameron saves Christmas or no?

Now, see, you've eliminated all interest in your second thing that you were going to say by dragging that guy into it. I still like the OG Ten Commandments. Still fun to watch. Thank you. Some Egyptians in the crowd. You know, the way they parted the Red Sea was it was a mold of Jell-O, and they shot it with a torch and melted the middle part.

Sea parted. Wait was that Charlton Heston? Yes. Yes. Yes. Rumor has it that he left angry that day because some of the crew ate the jello before he could get to it. Okay so enough talk about religious movies. ate the jello before he could get to it. Okay, so...

Enough talk about religious movies. I'm sorry I brought it up. I have an even dumber, not dumber, but a silly topic today. Because Little Mermaid is out there and everybody's loving it and only one of us has seen it. And some people, you know,

they're going to wait around for it to come to TV or whatever. So I'd just like everybody to recommend another movie that has fish in it for any reason. I thought of one that I can say if anybody is having a hard time thinking of a movie with fish in it. Brandon, what do you have? Deep Blue Sea. Nice.

Nice. That's a big-ass fish. Sharks and Samuel L. Jackson, one of the best movie deaths of all time. Yes, yes. Can't go wrong with Deep Blue Sea. I love it. That's a pretty fun movie. LL Cool J.

Strange to see LL Cool J in a chef's hat instead of a Kangol. Talking to a bird. Talking to a bird. And he made a music video for that too where he turns into a shark. One of the craziest music videos ever. Somebody in the audience is fucking psyched about it. Somebody knows. Losing their mind over there.

That's exciting. That was a great answer Brandon I don't think anybody else could probably come up with a better one where the competition has started I'm already giving out points it's not fish centric but I'm sure the abyss has fish in it

yeah there's fish swimming around there's gotta be they're in the trench of the ocean. There's gotta be like an occasional Yeah, but it's not about. The Mariana Trench. Not a feature film.

They don't affect the plot, I guess. But it is a great movie and I suggested it on this podcast maybe the last time I was talking to you because I'd just seen it again

and it is fantastic. And I'll throw out for kitsch value The Incredible Mr. Limpet. Oh! Which is like Don Knotts It's kind of funny 1967

I don't know I'm not sure I'm right I'm a fabulous It's an animated fit a man who gets turned into a fish For Settle down Navy reconnaissance It's a human who turns into a sea creature. So it's a reverse mermaid.

And it's animated. And the fish still. It's half animated. The fish. Yeah, it's half animated. The fish still needs to wear the glasses. Yeah, the fish still needs to wear the glasses. He's got glasses, but the fish needs to wear them.

But John Knotts is always funny. I mean, who doesn't want to go to the optometrist that's got glasses that fit man or fish? Yeah. Those are some good fittingfitting glasses right there. Yeah, they stayed on the nose. Stayed right on the nose. That's what I don't like about... Can I just talk about Little Mermaid for a second?

Yeah. I haven't seen it yet, but Brandon, didn't they, like, uncute all the animals? Don't they just look like regular animals? For me, it's like what ruined Lion King. It's like lions are scary as hell when they're real. And, like like with the fish they look creepy

like flounder look crazy but the movie's enjoyable but like the fish were creepy oh really yeah like flounder's not too realistic flounder's like one of those fish with one eye on each side

you know it doesn't do that Disney thing where it figures out how to get both eyes on one side cause that's cuter it's not cute it's disturbing

photorealistic disturbing they do only have two eyes on one side side because that's cuter. It's not cute. It's disturbing. Photorealistic disturbing. They do only have two eyes on one side. What do you mean? Flounder. The fish. Yes, they do. An actual flounder. Or a skit. Two eyes on one side. Maybe a halibut, too.

Are halibuts... Oh my god. They might have two eyes on one side. That kid from The Simpsons is in the audience. You know what they might be? I think you might be right. Are halibuts, are they halibuts? Oh my God. They might have two eyes on one side. Are they flat? That kid from The Simpsons is in the audience. You know what they might be? I think you might be right. Yeah, you might be right.

Because they're on the bottom. Yeah. So their eyes, I'm going to grind it up to the, yeah. No, I haven't seen, I want to see it. It's good. The water effects look amazing. It looks like a musical I really want to see. Yeah, I was going to say that's probably the worst part is the water effects.

They're not great. The hair floating, it's kind of weird. But if you've never seen the original, my problem is it's just going to be so close to the original material that I'll just be kind of bored with the fact that I know everything's going to happen. Oh, you mean the story. You know the story.

Yeah, exactly. But not even just story, but just like the individual beats of things that occur. Even down to, I'm sure Melissa McCarthy just has that one song. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that's what's wrong with the original Little Mermaid is the villain has one song. She's barely in the movie.

You know? But anyway. Does that weird priest show up? What? There's like a priest in the 89. Oh, yeah. No, no, no. See, back in the day, kids,

Disney animators used to like to put sex jokes in there. And the priest has like a little something going on downstairs when he's marrying whoever. Oh, like there's something in his body, in his basement? Yeah, the priest gets a little excited. Wasn't there a dildo in the Golden Castle and stuff on the cover too? Yeah. Preach. That wasn't in the book gets a little excited. Wasn't there a dildo in the Golden Castle and stuff on the cover too? Yeah. Preach.

That wasn't in the book, Padgett. No, it was not. The book was written by Hans Christian Andersen. It was. Was Sebastian the crab in the book? There was no Sebastian the crab. Really? No.

They didn't have Jamaican crabs in your book? She was so offended. They didn't have Jamaican crabs in your book? She was so offended. There was no Sebastian the crab in My Little Mermaid. No, it's actually a very tragic, upsetting story. So since you haven't seen either, would you advise her to see the new one first or the old one first?

Oh. Yeah, which one should I? I'd say go ahead and go in modern and then go backwards. I say see the new one and then go see the old one. If you don't like the new one, then you probably don't need to see any of it. I think that's what I'll do. You're a little experiment.

Yeah, let us know. Let us know how it goes. Do we have a text chain? I can't tweet you. Do not get in a text chain with Tadget. I warn you, do not do it. I accidentally, we were in a text chain, and I felt bad because I was out on a cruise,

and I didn't want to miss hundreds of texts on this chain and get a cruise rate charged for them. And so I dipped out of the group but then i found out later you can't you can't get back in really do you want me to let you in somewhere well to the to the text chain that we were in i can't get back into it there's no there's no turning back when you jump out of the text chain apparently you're the matt walsh of that text chain we can start a new one. You're locked down. No.

Okay. All right. Let's worry about this later. Okay. Or never. Let's pencil this in for never. And I'm writing down the fish movies in the wrong place. This is going to be a disaster.

All right. So we got Mr. Lippet. We got Deep Blue Sea. What do you think, Patrick? Am I allowed to say the shape of water? You are. Yeah. Fish man, a fish man, sexy fish man.

Yeah. He's at least half fish, right? He's half fish. Half man, half fish. Yeah. And I don't blame her for what she did. I don't blame her for that scene at all. Everybody needs love, folks.

It's true. Yeah. Are you... I got a fish at home right now in the bathtub. She's flopping around in there waiting for daddy. Look how literally the audience took that. Like, the guy replaced Jon Hamm's fucking a fish. Like, no, I'm...

It's absurdist humor. Oh, deep blue sea. That was it. Deep blue sea. All right. I'm going to get it. Ten people are going to tweet me. That poor fish. You monster. It's consensual. Relax.

Alright, I'm writing down the abyss? I'm going to watch it and look for fish. They don't move the story. I'm going to let you know how many fish are in it. Oh yeah, alright. let's cross that out. Let's go limp it. That's a good idea.

I want to know what Ellis is. What's yours? I got a good one. I got one. I was going to go Deep Blue Sea 2, but I'm not. There literally is a Deep Blue Sea 2. There is a Deep Blue Sea 2. There is?

And I believe a third one. So I think the trilogy's been complete. I would love to take, because I'm a big Kareem Abdul-Jabbar fan, The Fish That Saved Pittsburgh, but instead, I'm going to go with a slightly more realistic fish. Tell us more ones

that aren't your answer. Jaws the Revenge is one of my all-time favorite bad movies. Wait, was that three? That was four. Oh. That's where the shark has ESP and swam down to waters

where a great white shark can't survive in just to murder the Brody family matriarch. And it's awesome. But the actual answer for me, Doug, is starring many of the Monty Python legends. Oh, that's my answer. A fish called Wanda.

Oh, really? No, that's not it. Prominent fish. Mine has all of Monty Python in it. Because my favorite fish movie is Monty Python's Meaning of Life. There you go. For the entire cast, all the guys are made into fish. And it's fucking so weird.

It's great. Yeah. But what was your movie again, Mark? A Fish Called Wanda. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's a fun movie. Kevin Kline won the Oscar. Jamie Lee Curtis.

I even think John Cleese won an Oscar for writing the screenplay. Did he? Maybe. Nominated, probably. We don't need to worry about it. Eric Idle. It's not part of the game. It's an honor to be just nominated, really.

Kevin Klein. That's what I said, yes. Oh, I thought you said John Cleese. Yes, you're right. Eric Idle. Yes. Michael Palin.

Michael Palin. No one knows him. Okay. Eric Idle's not in A Fish Called Wanda. He's not? No. I'm going to be great at this.

He might have dropped by the set. Maybe you were feeling a vibe. Maybe you were feeling something. Could be. Could be.

So when somebody drops by the set, it doesn't count as them being in the movie? No. Just so I know when we start playing the game. You gotta get in there and say a line. Unless they're into special fakes, right? So the guy who brought cocaine doesn't count as being in the movie?

No. But he definitely changes that movie. He affects the plot. Yeah, he's got an effect on things. Alright, so Mark went with Fish Called Wanda. Excellent work, everybody. Just coming up with four

fish movies. Good team effort. A lot of diversity in those movies. Yeah. Alright, it's in the record. You can't take it back now. Oh, wow. So I can't run for Senate or something. It could come back to haunt me.

He said the abyss. What about the podcast where you said... This guy thinks he could be our senator, but he also thinks the abyss is about fish. How do you defend that? This is the real brain damage we got going on over here in this guy. Matt Walsh claims he's a fish fan. But he sure stays

with a guy that fucks a fish. Yeah, what about that Mark Ellis compatriot of yours? There's a real bad politician named Mark Ellis, too, in Australia. Welcome to it. Yeah. It's you and me, bud. Walsh Ellis, the good ones.

When you Google Mark Ellis, does he come up first? It's a baseball player and then me and then the bad politician. So I've leapfrogged him for now. Keep Googling Mark. The good one. You're in a good spot. Thank you.

That's me. Just your only plug at the end Just Google Mark If everybody types me into Google 10 times tonight It's really going to help the algorithm It's a real important contest That you're trying to win Just type in Mark Ellis, John Hamm's replacement

Mark Ellis I mean that should get you there It really should It's quite a credit you have there alright so thanks for all the movie wrecks and we're going to take our first break we'll be right back

we're back alright so we picked some name tags over the break, and Brandon is playing for Brandonator Judgment Day. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and then Matt's playing for 51st Kate's. Yeah. Because Kate cleverly put his face on her name tag. And then Mark is playing for No Courtney for Old Men.

And this is a good old Western theme kicking in here. Padgett is playing for Brookback Mountain. So great job, everybody. And it's time to play our first game. And it's called Live, Die, Repeat. Crowd always goes crazy for it. Yeah, I'll explain it. I know, I know.

Padgett's played this before, I'm pretty sure. Yeah, I think he had such a great time playing it that you just erased it from your memory. Some things are too fun. I'll say the title of a motion picture. A real, genuine film.

Played in theaters and everything. And the first one of you that can repeat back that title completely and correctly is the winner. Oh, God, this one, okay. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think if I had to put money on who's going to win this, I'd say Paget. It seems really, she seems poised and ready. Yeah. Yeah.

She's almost out of her chair. It's fun. It's really fun. She's got that foot planted in action. Do we hit a lap or we just say it? You just say it.

You can guess as often as you like. Every time somebody guesses wrong, I'll go back and start over at the beginning of the title. But the point is, you have to say it all the way through correctly and unbroken.

And do you want to do a practice one just to get the feel for it? I was going to ask. Yeah. We get a couple cuts before the game. You were looking at me like, I would like to practice this. You've never played this game before?

I don't remember. Okay. It's all just one big magical blur. Right, it's true. Okay. So, here's an example. Fences.

Fences. See, you said it the quickest. Oh, that's the game. Okay. So, you win. Yeah. It's that easy.

Look out, Brewster. There's a new sheriff in town. Yeah, yeah. No, no. Are the sample questions easier than the real questions? I mean, sometimes the titles are longer. Should I do a longer one? No, no.

Let's try a longer one. We'll try a longer one. Ready? Damn it. Joe Dirt. Joe Dirt. See, you win, Matt. Okay.

You did it. It's that easy. It's that easy to win. Oh, now I feel confident. You should. This is terrible timing. My edible just kicked in, so this is not good.

This is not good My edible just kicked in So this is not good This is not good It's tricky But you can still hear Yeah Alright when does it count For now What When does it start counting

Alright Okay I'm like ready to jump On my chair for some reason Shh Don't worry baby Okay This is so fun I feel like one like live Like a football's gonna drop ready to jump off my chair for some reason. Shh, don't worry, baby.

This is so fun. I feel like one live, like a football's gonna drop, we have to jump off. Rolls to the ground. Loose ball drill. Away we go. Away we go. Away we go. That's also a movie, but that's not what I meant.

Ah, I thought I had it. Yeah. That one guy got his heart broken. Jeez. Ready or not? Ready or not. Ready or not. That's also a movie.

That's not what I meant either. I was really about to say, here I come. And I'm like, that's not a movie. That's not even a sequel. That's just dog-invitization. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Big. Big night.

Big trouble little China. Big George. Big George Foreman. Big fish George. Big George Foreman the bot. Shit, it's a long ass title. Big George Foreman, the bot. Shit. It's a long ass title. Big George Foreman.

Big George Foreman. The. And his grill. Big George Foreman. The miraculous. The miraculous. Big. Big George Foreman.

The miraculous. Big George Foreman. Big George Foreman. The miraculous. Big George Foreman story. Big. Big. George Foreman.

The miraculous story. Of. George Foreman. Big George Foreman. The miraculous story. the miraculous story of George Foreman. Big George Foreman. The miraculous story of the heavyweight champion of the world. What did you say? Big George Foreman the miraculous story of the heavyweight champion of the world.

Big George Foreman the miraculous story of the once and future champion of the world. Big George Foreman, the miraculous story of the once and future heavyweight champion of the world. That is correct. God damn it. She did it. Wow. She did it. Wow.

She did it. It's like a gambling high, this game. And I still thought I won just by repeating the word big. I was like, I got it. It's a movie. It is a movie. Yeah. Yeah.

It's true. Yeah. As soon as you said format, I was like, oh, shit. That's a long title. Oh, that's a title. That's mean. Yeah. It's got a title on it.

Yeah, most of it after the colon, of course. But nonetheless. I'm glad we don't have to speak the punctuation in certain titles. Yeah, I'm sure marquees at many movie theaters just got away with Big George Foreman, left it at that. But all those other words are important. And yeah. Wow. at that but uh it is all those other words are important and uh yeah wow okay been dying to do that one i didn't want to do it till it had been out for a little while because right when it was about to come out or it just opened is when i i thought of it and i was like people are going to be so uh confused that this is the title of something.

All right. So that means Padgett gets to go first in our next game. Yeah. It's a little something I call ham or bacon. Here's how it works, Padgett. All right. All right. Here's how it works, Padgett, and everybody else. I'm going to say a line that might possibly be from a motion picture and spoken by Kevin Bacon,

or from a motion picture and spoken by Jon Hamm. That's good. Or made up and not a part of either one of their filmographies. So for every one of these the answer is Bacon or Hamm or neither.

But not Hamm from Toy Story. No, that doesn't come into it at all. Good question. but not ham from Toy Story. No, that doesn't come into it. Okay, got it. At all. Good question. So going first might not be an advantage for me. Well, you get a guess first. Okay, let's go.

You're coming in as the reigning champion. That's the good news. The once and future, anyway. The once and future reigning champion of the game. The miraculous story of the once and future champion. Yeah. All right. So here's how it works, though, Padgett. Yeah.

Here's where it gets tricky, is you get a guess, bacon or ham or neither, and if you get it wrong, then Mark gets to guess from the two remaining options. Yeah. And if he misses it, Brandon gets the gimme point. Yeah. He still has to answer. Sure he does. You're right.

It has to be on record. I don't like the hostility that came with that, buddy. He still has to answer, dog. It's not fair just to give the point. Fucking Brandon's got to say it. Yeah, you can't just be over there thinking it. You can't coast, man. We got to know that you know it

there have been guests on the show that are so high they forget what happened but I think and Brando's edible just kicked in that happened to me one time on your show you asked me a question

I long paused and I said no because I had no idea what you asked me. And you were like, that wasn't... It wasn't a yes or no question. You were babbling over Zoom. Pick one of these Olsen twins.

No. No, you got to pick one. For what reason? right so uh um and then whenever somebody gets one right they get a point and the next person in the row is first in the next one so a lot of it just comes down to a chance and what the person next to you uh does or does not know. Oh, did I mention, I'm not going to try to do an impression of Jon Hamm or Kevin Bacon. That would be ridiculous to acting treasures like that who rarely attempt funny accents.

Right? So I'm going to, I'm going to deliver their line in a misleading, silly voice. So it won't be delivered in the way that they originally intended. Or did it. Gadget? Yep.

Tell me, is this Kevin Bacon speaking or Jon Hamm or neither? Is that a walk-in humidor? Don't be misled by the voice. But I am. I know. Would you like to hear it again? No, no, no, no. Jon Hamm.

Oh, that's your guess? Yeah Oh you thought he walked in? I thought you were No You thought he came? Oh my god He looked out like Mark sorry

Holy shit That son of a bitch Sorry Mark Sorry Mark Sorry Mark But John Hamm is here It's a tough business This podcast thing.

I really don't know, but I am going to go with it. No, Jon Hamm isn't here, but you know what? Let's go ahead and leave. Let's leave the seat open in case Elijah shows up. Always like a good Elijah's seat joke. All right, so Mark, thank you for playing along. And that's your answer. Paget, you think that Jon Hamm said that in a motion picture?

No, but that's what I said. Okay. Incorrect. Oh. I thought he was trying to push you off the correct answer. There we go, to Mark Ellis. There's two remaining answers. Would you like to hear the quote again?

I want to hear you do the quote again, Doug. Okay, here we go. Is that... Oh, Is that... Is that... Is that a walk-in thermidor? Thermidor? I don't know what you're saying. I'm sorry. He said

humidor in the first one. Is that a walk-in cuspidor? That's what she was saying. No, it's humidor. So that's Floyd the Barber, right? Humidor is right. Is it Floyd the Barber? A little bit.

Or was it the cat? The great Gildersleeves guy. Yeah. Ooh! There was a cat animated... Or like, you know, the guy selling a bowling ball to Fred Flintstone. Yes! What would you like?

Black? Brown? How about something catchy? Like, you know, the guy selling a bowling ball to Fred Flintstone. Yes. What would you like? New black, new brown? How about something catchy? How about the measles? This was, you know, came at times before vaccinations. You do that perfectly, though. That's well done. All right. What's happening, Mark?

Yeah, Mark. Now that you've collected my thoughts, I believe that is Kevin Bacon. I think the movie's Wild Things. Okay. I mean, I really like that you figured that out, but incorrect. Yes!

Neither! Yeah. Well played. Well played. Well played, sir. The edible's not all the way functioning yet. Brandon and I, we're in this. We're in this, man.

Brandon is on the board. And that means we're... It's a tough seating chart for me. Oh, yeah. Now, hold on. Now Matt gets to go first on this round. Enjoy. Yeah. Matt.

Doug. Bacon, ham, neither. Mm-hmm. You want some bacon on this? Do you want to hold the ham? I'll go meatless. I did want to think, instead of neither, I did want a more vegan option.

But I couldn't think of... Jackfruit. Who would that be? Soy Riso? You could say Soy Riso? So Fritas at Chipotle? I knew I hit a wall there. I couldn't come up with a good one, so that's why I went with neither.

It's more clear, yeah, no doubt. Here's the line, Matt. It's like driving a toaster through a car wash. Oh, what was that? I don't know where that... I got a little southern version of that same guy. It's like driving a toaster through a car wash.

If this is what I think it is, that was an insane reading of that line. I'm going to say Jon Hamm. Incorrect. The audience. Padgett? Do you remember the other options?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm going to go with bacon. Bacon is correct! It's Apollo 13, right? Bacon, bacon, bacon. It is from Apollo 13. From Car Wash 2? Somebody in the audience knew that one, too.

Who's it from? Apollo 13. Oh, boy. Yeah, they had to do a scary maneuver. Because he's describing how they get it back. Yeah, and his character was like the guy who was always making wisecracks and stuff. Wow. Swigert.

They have a big statue of the astronaut at the Denver airport. So I took a picture of it because I was like, that's Kevin Bacon. Oh, wow. You know, Mark's been in show business for a long time, and he's like six degrees from any statue in any airport. I know them all. I've been with that statue. I worked with that statue.

Yeah. Well, what about that little monkey gargoyle that talks at the Denver airport? Did you see that? I didn't get on that floor, no. Dang. What? Because I saw it once, and then I went back to look at it again, and it wasn't there anymore.

Wait, there's a monkey at the Denver airport? Yeah, that's like a gargoyle. He's got like little wings. Does it help you? Like this way is terminal A. No, he just sort of like when you stand in front of him, he just sort of talks he says general statements so it feels

like you might be having a conversation with him. How's your day? Like if you're standing in front of him, he'll just be like you probably have a flight to catch. You know, those kinds of things. It's not like a drug sniffing gargoyle? I don't think so. He's way up on a pedestal and like not interested in my bag.

I feel like this might be just your special friend. Turns out there never was. Nobody in this room has heard of the monkey gargoyle in the Denver airport. He goes to a secret floor. I've got video proof on my old phone that I lost when I find it someday. Oh, there it is. Okay. So anyway, I do have video of it.

It's real. I swear to God. If you didn't post it, it didn't happen. All right. So who got that point? I did! Oh, Padgett did, yeah. Sorry, Kate.

We're going to come back. Okay, but we're starting with Mark on this one. Bacon ham or neither. Thank you sir May I have another Alright

I believe that is Kevin Bacon From Animal House Yes there's no way to disguise that Alright no Courtney for old men That classic line There's no fixing that There's no hiding it from anybody Alright

Three of you are on the board. Matt, it's always a pleasure to have you. I let Paget finish that sentence earlier. But we'll start with Brandon on this one. Are you ready,

Brandon? What's up? Ahem. Get out of your Ham. Get out of your pants. Get out of your pants. I'm going to go with John Ham. I think that's from Bridesmaids, right?

Oh, I love when you have a full guest like that and you show your work, but that is incorrect. Matt Walsh, get out of your pants. Kevin Bacon, Wild Things? Now listen, you don't have to name a movie. You'll be so triumphant

to just get one right and leave it at that because it's Kevin Bacon and Tremors! Oh, right. I'll take it. I'll take it. We're on the board, Kate. Tremors. Actually, I don't even think it's Kevin Bacon who says it. Oh, no. He'll take it. I'll take it. I'll take it. We're on the board, Kate. Shivers. Actually, I don't even think it's Kevin Bacon who says it. Wait.

Oh, no. He says it, but he says it to Rhonda, whoever that is. Because they've got to run their underwear or something. I remember that scene as a kid. Very empath. Yeah. I don't. Yeah, but apparently it was like eating her from the pants up.

So it was just like, get out of your pants. It was good advice. He wasn't being pervy like in some of his other films. Alright. Kevin Bacon explained some creepy ass like Willem Dafoe goes, what? Alright.

Hey, everybody's on the board. This is exciting. Pag pageant you're up you ready pageant yeah um i hear you blocked the proposal to position nuclear missiles in turkey In Turkey. Was that Jon Hamm, Kevin Bacon, or neither? I think it's Hamm. Why do you think it's Hamm? Because I think it's... Something he said like in... Yeah, he was playing like high-level Pentagon or FBI stuff.

He was like, I want to do these parts. There's also been a lot of bacon answers, so it's good. I know, but also I think at this point, because I only know strategy, I don't know a lot of movies. I think at this point, Doug has teased, believing Hammy would be here, teased John with no

John. Oh, that's good. So at this point in the game, it sounds like military speak and John wanted to do that and did that. So am I right or wrong? But did I write this out of anger

after John canceled? And you just pulled him completely from the game. He did cancel at 2.30 a.m. last night. But you wouldn't want more work in your life. That's what I'm thinking.

Yeah. You kept the same answers regardless of John Hamm showing up or not. No, he does his work and then he's ready. You were like, I am done for the show Sunday. Let's chill. I'm going to confidently say Jon Hamm.

That dog took the high road. No, he didn't. He probably got high and relaxed. Didn't worry about it. But I do worry about it. I like to have a quality game. So what was your answer? John Hamm.

Angie? Okay, that's incorrect. Whoa. You have to answer, Mark. Mark, what do you think? All right. I knew it wasn't John Hamm from Top Gun Maverick because they don't have a country they specify.

Very true. See, now I'm in the same, now I'm out thinking myself. See, that's the problem. It's strategy. You're gaming the game. But you know. Go with your gut.

I'm going with my gut, which features a lot of bacon. Bacon. It is bacon. I mean, that's, you know, I used to always say more bacon. Which is from what movie is it? Whenever bacon was present. And it's such a serious sounding line.

It's no fun at all. And it's from a comic book movie. It's when he played Sebastian Shaw in X-Men First Class. Oh, right. Yeah. X-Men First Class. Wow. Not a good guy. All right, Mark. Right? Yeah, he's pretty bad. X-Men First Class. Wow. Not a good guy.

All right, Mark. Right? Yeah, he's pretty bad. Mark's got two points. Pretty evil, I think. Yes. Back to you, Doug. Real good death scene.

He dies real good, though. He does have a cool death scene. Yeah, yeah. It's one of the few movies where you'll see one character push a coin through another character's head. Oh, cool. Yeah. It's pretty neat. They even have the shot looking through the hole.

You know what I mean? Real fun. As it goes into his skull. Real fun camera work, you know? All right. This goes to Brandon. You never fuck with another man's car or his hair. You never fuck with another man's car or his hair.

But go with neither. I don't think John... No. But go with neither. I don't think John. No. You're going neither? Neither. Neither is incorrect. Oh.

Matt Wallace. I'm going to go Kevin Bacon Footloose. Because of the hair? The hair, the car, the whole He said it to Chris Penn in a cornfield Incorrect, Patrick It is John Hamm from Fletch No, it's not in Fletch Have you seen Fletch?

No, it's not from Fletch But itletch? Have you seen Fletch? No, it's not from Fletch, but it is Jon Hamm in that sequel to Big Lebowski directed by John Turturro, starring John Turturro. Oh, wow. The Jesus Rolls. Oh, wow. Jon Hamm plays a hairdresser who just says shit like that. Really? I've seen it.

Have you seen it? Did you watch that, Doug? No. Yeah. I'm like, no. you watch that, Doug? No. Yeah. No, I couldn't do it. I saw parts of it on TV, but yeah, I couldn't do it. Yeah, it was rough.

But I did get a point, right? What's that? You just did, yes. Yeah! Yeah! This is very exciting. Mark has a chance to make this a three-way tie if he gets this next one. Are you ready?

Go. All she wants to do is dance and make romance. Can I guess Don Henley? It's ham, bacon, or neither. All she wants to do is dance and make romance. I think it's neither. Neither is correct. That is a Don Henley lyric.

Is it really that? Nice. Just a dumb Don Henley lyric. Somehow managed to get in here. All right, so. How did that get into the, were you listening to Don Henley's solo records? I don't know how it creeped into the world here,

but did I say that you were going to tie it up? Because I was wrong. You brought home the win with that one, my friend. Okay. That was all it took. Well done. It pays off listening to Henley. Here's one just for you just for you Mark Ellis

before we go to commercial break and we'll come back and we'll play our last game which you will get to go first in yeah that's all you want here yeah today Dynasty Typewriter

you got Ellis alright I need my glasses here we go An A-Dynasty typewriter? You got Ellis. All right, I need my glasses. Here we go. Up there, we gotta push it. That's our job. Thank you, Doug. What is it? The hard deck is 100 feet and it is Top Gun Maverick.

Jon Hamm, of course. That is neither. Oh, it's the first Top Gun. Because that's what Viper said in Top Gun. Tricky baited you. Tricky. He totally baited you.

I totally got you on that one I am now the top gun That was mischievous I tricked you Iceman Ellisman We got one more big game to play We'll play right after this We'll be right back

We're back We're back right after this. We'll be right back. We're back! We're back! We're back! I just want to apologize to Kate. She invested all that time on a loser right now. Wait, it's not over yet. You can still win.

No, I know, but I feel... No, it's still anybody's game to win. Do you ever watch Family Feud? Yeah. Matt Walsh? Yeah. Is this double points round or something? Well, you know how the points just keep going up,

so whoever wins the last round wins the whole thing. So you could lose, lose, lose, and then just as long as you get that last one, you can win the whole thing. I thought you said Family Feud like you're going to come over and kiss me or kind of touch me inappropriately. Like those hosts used to do. No, Steve Harvey stands six feet away from everybody. Oh, he does.

You're right. He's a journalist. Well, he used to. Richard Dawson was a kisser. He was a kisser in the 70s and 80s. Yeah, touchy-touchy. Yeah, then they had a bunch of non-kissers. They had the guy from Home Improvement.

Richard Karn ain't kissing anybody. Louis Anderson. Louis tried to kiss. Life with Louis ain't kissing anybody. Louis Anderson. Yeah, that's right. Life with Louis isn't about kissing strangers. Ray Combs? Ray Combs didn't kiss anybody. He was my family feud host growing up. I was a big Ray Combs guy. Oh, wow.

What's his name from Seinfeld? Kramer? Jason Alexander? Peterman. Peterman. Oh, right. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

He hosted it for a second, too. Yeah. Wow, that's good trivia. He does the Westminster Dog Show every year now. Michael O'Donnell? No. He's Dog Show guy now. Westminster Dog Show.

Don't ask the audience at a trivia game show. Because we'll start a bad habit. As soon as I think of his name, I blurt it out I'll think I think it's like three names right it is three names John John O'Hurley O'Hurley oh Jonathan Taylor Thomas John O John Hamm O'Hurley John O period like David O Russell and he's great he's got a great voice he's great for the dog shows I watch him on the dog shows. Dog shows are great. Well.

No one said they weren't. Yeah. Don't be defensive about what you like. You're right. Own it. Save that for a dog show podcast. There it is. There's podcasts about everything.

All right. So for our final game today, we've got to determine a winner. And I'd like to play a game we play on the show called Last Person Standing. Always doing wrinkles to this game of late. And today, specifically, I'm calling it Last Woman Standing. Oh, right. Because, yeah, we're going to play an actress edition of the show because people always name dudes when given the opportunity. And it's fun to change it up.

So normally how this game works is we get a name or two of actor, actress, and then all of us, I like to play along, we take turns naming movies that that person's been in. If you can't think of one, you're out, but you can go to your lifeline once for help in order to stay in the game for another go round. And

we're going to do two actresses today, I think, but getting ahead of myself. Can we get the house lights up just a tad again? Just a little bit? Yeah, let's see these people. Where are the Pasternak's at

oh yeah see i thought you might be in the back you little all right so uh if you've listened to the show over the years uh jesse pasternak i met at a film festival in traverse city michigan and he uh ended up becoming a regular on the show at the very tender age of, he started around nine or 11, and I'll never forget nine or 11. No, he was probably about 18 or so. But anyway, one of the younger guests on the show, I can't say those numbers without- How did he get into the show? What's that? No, no, it was impressive

for a nine-year-old or an 18-year-old. No, he was older. But anyway, but he was young. You know, he was young compared to my normal guests. You know, he had to sit next to, like, Jeff Garlin and shit. So anyway, so Jesse was on the show a bunch of times, and his brother Sam has also showed up at shows and been

involved and was on stage once, I think, in a 12 Guests of Christmas in New York. But anyway, pleasure to know that they came out to the show today. They gave me a heads up they were coming and that they're in the audience. And so I wanted to get them involved in some way. So we'll go Jesse first. Name an actress. Diane Keaton.

Diane Keaton. Diane Keaton. I love that answer. Sam, name an actress. Yeah, it's harder when your brother goes first, isn't it? He took one of the two or three that are out there. But if you could find one, find one in your heart. Was that Sam? Yeah.

Okay. I thought somebody else in the audience just got fired up I'll answer for him Goldie fucking Hahn man alright so we're going Goldie Hahn

house lights down again let's hear it for the pastor next I mean those are two of the greatest actresses ever and you can even bang out one of the answers

as a movie that they're both in. There you go. So where did I say? We're starting with Mark. Okay. Then we'll go to Padgett, then to Matt, then to Brandon, then to me. I'm just here to be a spoiler.

I can't win. So we can pick from either library, either celebrated catalog. Either Canon. Okay. Keaton or Hahn. Don't try to fucking slip in a Kate Hudson on me. I would never, Doug.

I'll lose my bike. She's new Goldie Hawn. Like if they were a product, she'd be like, Goldie Hawn 2.0. All right. So, Mark, start us off. A film. And, of course, everybody in the audience, you've been doing great so far. But don't help out with answers unless you're a lifeline and you get called on.

Don't yell until called on. That's right. I don't need you yet, Courtney, but stay ready. Stay ready, Courtney. Stay fired up on the tarmac. Even though he's an old man, and there's no Courtney for old men. What do you got?

I'm going to go with Annie Hall. Of course you are. Why not? It's low-hanging fruit. If I didn't take it, somebody else is going to take it. She won the goddamn Oscar for that. What's that, Padgett?

You have to start. You have to start? You have to start with the list. Padgett's in my head. A little bit. Private Benjamin. Very good. Because we're doing either lady. Both ladies. Around and around. That sounded so filthy.

I didn't. I meant... I would. I love them both. I meant... I would. I love them both. I think they're sexy. I'm not going to say no. Hannah and her sisters? What about it? Is she one of those ladies there?

I think, like, could you have, like... If you were throwing darts at Woody Allen movies on a dartboard, how could you possibly? She really was in every one of his movies except for that one. That's Barbara Hershey, Mia Farrow, and Diane Wiest are the women in that one. But since it's your first one, don't go to your lifeline already. Diane Keaton or Goldie Hawn?

Manhattan? Yeah. Yeah, I guess I gave you a clue when I said everybody out. I thought of Manhattan, but I was more sure for some reason about Hannah. Yeah, no, she isn't in Manhattan, so you're safe. Be careful next time.

Thank you. That's a breakfast ball. Thank you. That was my mulligan. a breakfast ball. All right. Thank you. That was my mulligan. Okay. We're not even through one round. I told you I wasn't being great. Matt's already giving up. You got a lifeline.

These women have both been in movies where there's been sequels. You could just maybe hear a title and add a two to it at your earliest possible convenience. All right. Brandon? First Wives Club. Yeah. That's the double banger right there. I was going to say one of those titles somebody else said. I was so bummed when somebody snatched it.

Snatched. Mark? I was going to go with it. She played Pennywise, right? snatched Mark I was going to go with it she played Pennywise I mean that makeup on Pennywise anybody could have played that role it probably was either one of those ladies into the sewer

I will say speaking of bangers I'll say the banger sisters oh alright yeah bangers I'll say the banger sisters oh all right yeah um gadget yeah it's strategy it's strategy you know how competitive I am just give me a second I'm really she's got a chessboard of movie titles overboard oh okay all titles. Overboard. Oh, okay. All-timer. Alright. That's a good one. Something's Gotta Give? Yes.

I didn't think any of you guys would have seen that. I was holding onto that one. That's a sneaky one. The Godfather. Yeah. It's true. It's gonna become slim-picking soon. It's gonna It's going to become slim picking soon It's going to get bad

No there's so many There are so many Here we go I got one are you ready for it Father of the Bride I got one now Yeah you do. I'm going to go with the sequel to Father of the Bride,

cleverly titled Father of the Bride 2. The new batch. Padgett? I'm going to go with Godfather 2. Oh, I'll listen to you. Probably mostly because there isn't a Father the Bride 3. Was there a First Wives 2? No.

That would be fun, though. So many numbers. It's okay, Matt. I asked myself the same thing. What is my lifeline, I guess? Okay, so Kate is's my lifeline, I guess. Okay, so... Kate? Kate is Matt's lifeline.

Maybe give him something, if you can, that'll, you know, help him think of a bunch of movies. But what do you got? Got a book club? Book club? Yeah. All right, book club. Fucking book club.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nice. Can I go? Yeah. With Jane Fonda and other ladies. Candice Bergen and Mary Steen Bergen. Anyway, all the Bergens are in it. A lot of Bergens.

Yeah. Whose turn is it? Brando? I'm really not offensive. She's in this. I turn is it? Brando? I'm, like, really unoffensive. She's in this. I think she is. The Graduate? No.

Shit. All right, I got to go to my lifeline. Go to your lifeline. He's going to his lifeline. Brandon, what's up? I got nothing. Oh, shit. Steph.

Oh, no. What is this? All right. All right. Calm down, everybody. That's insane. Book Club 2, everybody. That's insane. Book Club 2. Yes.

There is a sequel. What's the full title? The Book Club. It just came out. I don't know. It just came out. Don't say it out there. We're playing a game up here where he has to say the full title that you just said.

Did you hear her say it? No. Okay. The Book Club 2, the next chapter. Yeah full title that you just said. Did you hear her say it? No. Okay. The book club to the next chapter. Yeah, that's what she said. It has to be the next chapter, right? I hope they make book club three the final chapter. And then book club four, the epilogue.

And book club five, I don't know. No appendage. What? The appendice. Alright, so who's on? You. Oh, me? Don't take an easy one. Oh my god, I'm searching

everywhere. I'm still looking for Mr. Goodbar. Oh, cute. Are you taking a selfie or a picture of us? Both. Oh. Technology, huh? Yeah, I got both.

Simultaneously doing a selfie and shooting the room. I got both at the same time. I got a special camera. That's a great way to not feel shameless. I'll show it to you backstage along with footage of a talking gargoyle from the Denver airport. That footage is on the phone

that the Illuminati now has in their possession 50 feet below the surface. It's in the basement underneath the Denver airport. Or it's inside the cow, not cow, horse statue out front that's a blue devil horse that killed its maker.

Denver airport, man. There's a lot going on. They also have a Qdoba. I love that place. You mentioned Qdoba and Chipotle on this episode. Yeah. Qdoba is far superior to Chipotle. I don't know if you have sponsors, but is it?

I don't think I've tried it. Treat yourself. Yeah. They got a decent... Jersey Mike's of fast Mexican food. Jersey Mike's of fast Mexican food. It really is. But if you don't want actual food,

you know you're running to another flight, they got a decent Jamba Juice. Okay. Pass the monkey gargoyle all these years i can't believe i've been wasting my time with the movie podcast travel is so interesting airports are so fun to talk about all right um Where are we at? Whose turn is it? Mark? It was me, and I finally got one.

Okay, good. I was struggling for a minute. I'm glad you thought of it. I'm back with, it's a bit of a tearjerker, holiday film, The Family Stone. Yes.

See? I was wondering if Diane Keane was in that. Yeah, yeah. She is. She sure is. Her and Coach. Yeah, he's in it.

I call Craig T. Coach. He'll put you in a half Nelson. I don't acknowledge his real last name. Say his whole name or he'll put you in a half Nelson. That was pretty good. All right. Paget? Do you think of another one?

Or you got some more loaded up? It's Godfather 3. Oh, sneaky. Well played. Yeah. Got all the way back to you. Very good. What?

It was good. You patiently waited for it to come back? Patiently waited. Yeah. We all fell for it. Matt? Was there a Private Benjamin 2? Boogaloo.

No. Electric Boogaloo. Private Benjamin 2, the next deployment. No, I don't believe. There was no reboot? I don't believe. If they did follow it up, it was with another person. But she's in a movie that had a very similar storyline

because they thought, oh, that worked. Let's do that again. And I'll say it when it's my turn. G.I. Jane? No. All right. Thank you for playing, though. Matt Walsh, everybody.

I can go home? The best Matt Walsh. No, hang out. Well, I do want to hang out. Hang out. Sorry, Kate. It's only a few more minutes. No, I'm happy to hang.

There's only like 200 more films in these ladies' filmography. Oh, you didn't research it. You asked. No, I didn't. Oh, my hand. Oh, boy. I could have arranged it ahead of time. Doug, you're good.

You could have. With the Pasternak's. I don't think you did, though. But I think they both know that my passion for Keaton and Han goes pretty deep. Oh. What do you got, Brandon? I'm doing a Hail Mary on this one. I think she's in it. Death Becomes Her.

Thank God. Nice Hail Mary. That's a great one. Great movie. That movie fucks me up too. Meryl Streep's in that, right? Yeah, that movie fucks me up. I just want to say three of the people on this stage have movie podcasts, so I don't feel terrible. Okay, so it's back to me.

I can't believe Mark might win this thing. I wouldn't put all your eggs in that basket. I mean, if you do, I would definitely suspect Foul Play. That's the one I was trying to think of. Chevy Chase. Which one was that? Foul Play. Ah, that's right. It was Chevy's first movie.

Gary Manilow opening theme song. Once you say the movies, I get it. It's just the recall. Like, yeah, I saw that. I'm ready to change my pants again. Ready to put my clothes on the line for you. Okay, go ahead.

Matt? I don't know the words to the song. I don't know the movie. Okay, go ahead. Matt. I don't know the rest of the song. I don't know the movie. Mark, Matt. Mark. Sir. Is it you? It is me, yeah.

And you got nothing? No, I mean, I'm going to guess something. Okay. Bullets Over Broadway? Great guess. You're out. I have my life on. Okay.

Why are you guessing something then? Everybody else guessed it. Don't take any unnecessary risks. I almost eliminated you. Let's go to your lifeline. Courtney, what do we got? Because I said so. No, seriously, give us an answer.

Courtney, don't because I said so us. Very good, very good. Paget. Mark's still in it. All he needs is probably like one or two more to defeat him and Brandon. Matt's just hanging out, as you know. I'm learning for when I come back.

Oh, my goodness. You'll be unstoppable. Oh, my God. You know it. People will hate me. I'll be such a movie trivia bully. That's it? Sleeper.

Yeah. Great. I should have stayed in the Woody Allen world. This is what I'm learning. Just throw out Woody Allen movies. I'm glad you didn't say Sleeper. It's a very different movie. Very different, yeah.

Very different, yeah. Brandon? Man, I'm just going to throw out a Woody Allen movie. Oh, shit. Blue Jasmine? Look what we've done. There's a lot of white people in that, right? She was in that.

Cate Blanchett? The wrong white people in it. No, she wasn't in that one. I'm sorry, Brandon! That was a great... This is so meta. that was a great attempt I liked it I let Brandon down

she's in a movie I always confuse with Family Stone because it's practically the same title it's even like a family gets together and she's dying like is the plot of both movies and it's called Meet the Coopers yeah wait is that what Bradley Cooper no is the plot of both movies, and it's called Meet the Coopers. Yeah.

Never saw it. Wait, is that what Bradley Cooper? No. But that would have been fun. That launched him. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, Mark? Yeah, I think I'm probably out,

but I'm going to guess something. There's a movie where Goldie Hawn played Amy Schumer's mom. Snatched, I already said it. Oh, you did? Yeah. All right. I already snatched that one up. All right, let's do... Plus, I just like saying snatched or snatch is also a film.

They're both fun to say. I'll go with the new Overboard. Maybe Goldie Hawn made a cameo. Oh, she probably did, but I'm not aware. It's not worth it. Yeah, so you're out. Out. Yeah, but great job.

Padgett? Can I make a guess and then ask my lifeline? No. What? Everyone else did. Okay, then do it. We got to. It's gamesmanship. Hell yeah. Mr. and Mrs. What? Everyone else did. Okay, then do it. We got to.

It's gamesmanship. Hell yeah. Mr. and Mrs. Claus? I don't know what, I think I know what that is, but no. That's not what it's called? No. Brooks? I think I know what you're talking about.

Yeah, but what was it? It wasn't, Brooks? Yeah, but the book could give you that or some other title. She doesn't have to do that one. Baby Boom? Baby Boom. Baby Boom! Yes. Nice work!

Baby Boom was Diane Keaton, like suddenly her sister dies or something and she suddenly has a baby. And she's a corporate executive. And she's an executive and you can't juggle an executive job and a baby. As men already knew. Did she wear

a stylish hat in that movie? No, no hats. No hats? No hats. Really? It was pre-hats. Like power suits,

nice stilettos, yeah. Was Goldie in Captain Ron? Glasses, lots of glasses. Did Goldie appear in Captain Ron? She was in a movie with Kurt.

She's in a bunch of movies She's done a bunch of movies with him, but I can't remember We're still playing the game, y'all. What? I thought she won. Not yet.

No? No. Oh, sorry. Apologies. No, it's all good. No, because Doug can keep naming movies. Yeah. It's the last person standing.

This is the part where I show up. It just keeps going. Okay, sorry. It's torturous. Yeah. You did everything right, Brooke. This part is like everything. It's like chat GPT, but for movies.

Matt, you talk every time I'm sneaking into an answer. That's why I asked if I could leave. He's been wanting to go for seven minutes. We're playing live, die, repeat again. I just keep going back to the beginning. Love and death. Yeah, Diane Keene. Back keep going back to the beginning. Love and death. Yeah, Dayaki. Back to you, Padgett.

With traffic and the weather. Crimes and misdemeanors. Why do you keep picking Woody Allen movies she's not in? That's a first time I have picked the wrong movie. Not you specifically. Blue Jasmine 2? As a group. Collective you, yeah. As a group. Because we forget that he moved on to mess up Mia Farrow.

We just think he was with her forever. Yeah, Keaton pulled the ripcord. Yeah, with her she was in Manhattan Murder Mystery, she was in Interiors, she was in... Oh, I think there's got to be another comedy. Can you, now you're the last one standing, right? I think so.

Can you name that Mr. and Mrs. Claus? Yeah, it's called the Santa Claus Chronicles. Right, right. I was never going to get that. Or is it Christmas Chronicles? Christmas Chronicles. Christmas Chronicles. Yeah, that's why I wouldn't dare trying to guess it

because I'm not that familiar. They did two of them. Hands down, the hottest, sexiest Santa and Mrs. Claus you'll ever see. Name a sexier Santa or Mrs. Claus. Tim Allen. He's attractive. Post-Light, you're in that red outfit?

Come on. Does it have sex scenes Does he stuff her stocking Dude You haven't seen The second one What There's an unrated version

Oh god Shut up You have to get behind The red band On Netflix Yeah What you do It's like a hidden track

On a CD You know Like you play it For the kiddos And they go to bed On December 24th And then When you're

Putting all their bikes And stuff together Santa and Mrs. Claus just bang for like two hours. They show everything. The reindeer get involved. It's a good time. Only in the second one.

Padgett is our winner! Oh, yeah! Oh, I did! Strategy. I told you strategy. So now she did it. There we go. I did strategy I told you strategy so now she did it yeah

oh there we go oh and the the Private Benjamin thing I was thinking of is she did a movie called Protocol where she like goes to DC

and like you know becomes a politician accidentally she does stuff accidentally a lot she's in Butterflies They're Free

the movie that's like kind of like a play about her and a blind guy Cactus Flower with Walter Matthau oh my god

I forgot I can't believe how hard it is The Duchess and the Dirtwater Fox with George Segal wow this could have gone on for an hour more

yeah it could go for a second and we got more of the Diane Keatons but she's still got tons of shit in there too that we didn't get to. They've all had so many great runs,

and then they have comeback movies, then it launches another nice run. She's not in the 80 for Brady, is she? No. You're just going to guess every movie that's got older age actresses in it? I mean, she does sneak into most of them. But yeah, there needs to be does sneak into most of them. But yeah,

there needs to be a lot more opportunities for them. Did she do a movie with Andy Garcia where they're dating? What was that? I bet. What was that? Sounds like something they would do.

It was like his comeback after he'd been gone for a little while, Andy Garcia, and he was a little bit heavier, but he was actually kind of sexier. Now he's just older, and he's like, fuck. Yeah.

He's just kind of... It wasn't the Father of just older and he's like, fuck. Yeah. Like he's just like kind of. It wasn't the Father of the Bride reboot, was it? Was it? The new Father of the Bride? No. No. Does anybody know?

I don't know. Shoot, I don't know. I just. Does anyone remember a movie where Andy Garcia is sexy? With Mel Gibson. There we go. What was it?

Bird on a Wire with Mel Gibson. Oh. Shoot, that's. Yeah. She did that too. All right, Padgett, give us your plugs. What have you got to promote? I support a strike.

Yeah, you don't have to promote anything if you want to support the strike. I don't know if I don't think I have anything. Watch Criminal Minds and rereruns on Paramount Plus. That I won't be paid for. Until after the strike. No, it won't be retroactive. I think I'm doing an Arden...

No, at some point we're going to do Arden's podcast. We're going to do Will You Accept This Rose? Yeah, we're going to do that. And that's always a fun time. So Patrick Brewster, everybody. Matt Walsh, thank you for staying all the way to this part. And then please stay during the other guest plugs. But what have you got to promote?

I support Strike. A movie called Flamin' Hot coming out in a week. It's great in that movie. Yeah, it is very good. Highly recommend it. And I know the world needed one, so I started another rewatch podcast for a show called Veep. Tim Simons and I do it

and it's called Second in Command. Nice. Do you swear a lot? No, oddly enough. I don't think I do. Tim probably swears more. His character swears a lot. I feel like you're giving away a beautiful cake.

It does. It's such a gorgeous box. I thought in the car overall the Uber driver was going to be like, he thinks that's a cake. That's why he keeps breaking gently. But it turns out it's just a box of garbage. A pretty nice blanket, I think. Where's Brooke? Oh, hey, Brooke.

Congratulations. Be careful. It's got a weird flap that opens and you don't want all this shit to just fall out all of a sudden. Thanks, Matt. Brandon Collins, we miss you already. You going back east? Yeah, yeah. What do you got to promote, dude?

Yeah, I'm going back east for Drunk Black History. We're celebrating Juneteenth on Sunday, June 18th, so if you're in the New York area, come hang out with us. We're going to be at the Bell House in Brooklyn. 2 p.m. brunch show. We're going to be having mimosas, getting fucked up and learning about dope black history. There's also a live stream if you're still out here

west. Available at DrunkBlackHistory.com and just follow me on American Collins and all the social media platforms. I am on Twitter. I haven't been hacked yet thankfully. Way to rub it in. I appreciate it as always and you guys are great. Thanks so much. Thank you, Brandon. Mark Ellis, what do you got to promote?

You can Google me or Jon Hamm at your leisure. You can also check out my new Stand Up Hour special drops in July. I taped it right here at Dynasty Typewriter Theater. Wonderful staff, wonderful venue, so you all can check that out. I believe the release date is July 17th so mark your calendars. Yeah. You'll be down at Comic Con

as you are every year, yes? I'll be down at Comic Con. I'm telling jokes at American Comedy Company on Thursday. That's my show. I hear Doug Benson frequents the Gaslight District around that time as well. Yeah, Doug Loves Movies is the night before your show, also at

American Cuck-Caw Comedy Company. Cuck-Caw! And next show here at Dynasty Typewriter is on Sunday, July 23rd. Thank you so much, everybody, for coming out.

Thank you to Dynasty Typewriter. One more time for all my guests. Mark Ellis, Padgett Brewster, Matt Walsh, Brandon Collins. Thank you. Padgett, you have to come back real soon as the champion. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. You got to come back.

And as always, and what I was looking for was not to be found, but to be made. Thank you.