Dynamic Dialogue with Danny Matranga - 291: How to Workout With ZERO Motivation
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Hey, everybody, welcome in to another episode of the Dynamic Dialogue podcast. As always,
I'm your host, Daniel Matrenga. And in this episode, I'm going to be sharing some mental
models, frameworks, and general thoughts on persevering and maintaining discipline on
a fitness or personal growth journey of any kind.
I've worked with many clients over the years who have gone on to accomplish amazing things with
their fitness and in life, and I've been a long for the journey with them. These are people who
might be struggling with fitness, but be highly motivated and successful in other areas. And I've
learned a little bit about the keys to
what I believe it takes to stick with something that you are struggling with or that does not
come easy to eventually achieve a big goal, whether that be losing 50 pounds, gaining 25
pounds of muscle, or accomplishing something in your career, personal life, or relationships.
So let's get into those and I hope you enjoy the episode.
personal life, or relationships. So let's get into those and I hope you enjoy the episode.
This podcast has some awesome partners and one of my favorite, of course, is Legion Athletics.
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Okay. So a mental model or a way of looking at things that many people are familiar with when it comes to increasing compliance in search of an outcome or a goal is the importance of being able to see yourself reach the goal, being able to visualize
yourself reaching the goal. And I think when it comes to long-term goal setting, even we've seen
this in the research with things like short-term performance outcomes, goal setting is rather
remarkable. If you take two groups of people and you have one of them practice shooting
a free throw without the ball in their hand, and then another group, and you have them practice
shooting the free throw in their mind, no basketball. When you compare these two groups,
this has been shown in the literature, they both end up improving their shooting and the
visualization group scores on par with the actual practice group.
Now, if I played in the NBA, would I rely on rudimentary visualization tools such as this?
Probably not. I think I'd want something that was a little more comprehensive,
but visualization is really key. So if you are on a fitness journey, you're looking to improve,
you're looking to get better. Perhaps you're looking to lose body fat, visualize yourself leaner. If you are looking to build muscle, visualize yourself more muscular. If you want to pick up a morning routine of training, visualize yourself getting up in the morning, making a protein shake, hopping in the car early, getting to the gym, taking a shower, being early to the office, visualize these things. And yes, I am very much aware at the limited capability visualization has
to generate results. It is at best a force multiplier, meaning if you're not doing anything,
no amount of visualization will help. But these are tools for being successful and finding ways to
work out and find motivation to train and to push harder, even when you don't want to. And I think
visualization is the best starting point. From there, I have a couple of tips that I think fall
into the visual and ocular category. These are things that you can do and you can use. So another tool, this is a
framework that's worked very well for me, is writing the goal down. Okay, so I have a goal
sheet. And for many of you, this might seem silly, but as a highly motivated young person who did
not come from a particularly affluent background,
who had to essentially kind of pick myself up and carry myself through young adulthood
using personal training and fitness coaching as a way to pay my way through school, to
pay my rent, to pay my car payment, to buy my first home, to open my gym.
my rent, to pay my car payment, to buy my first home, to open my gym. These are things that have largely been done on one piece of paper or have largely all shared space on one piece of paper
for the better part of the last decade. When I was 20 years old, on a piece of paper, I printed
one year, five year, and 10 year goals. And I put those one year, five year, and 10-year goals. And I put those one-year, five-year and 10-year goals on a door
in my bedroom. And on that door, I had goals like be the top salesperson at 24-hour fitness,
be the top trainer at 24-hour fitness in terms of number of sessions, graduate with a 3.5 GPA or
higher, graduate in four years or earlier. These things that were important to me.
And obviously in my college days, those goals that I just mentioned were closer and goals like
owning a gym, having a podcast, having a following on social media, owning my first home.
Those were things that were in the tenure goal category. But interestingly enough,
every day seeing those things on my door,
looking me in the face before I walked out of my bedroom made a huge difference. I would consult
that list directly on a semi-regular basis. But even just having it there, even on the days that
I didn't stop to actually read what was on the list, knowing it was there, seeing the words,
and just being reminded, you have a goal, you have a
mission. And this tactic has worked really well for clients of mine as well. And those are more
personal goals, more success oriented goals, but you can obviously segue your fitness goals into
this. I like micro notes. Micro notes work really well. Leave a note in your car dashboard that says, go to the gym,
stop by the gym, visit the gym on your way home from work. Leave a sticky note on the fridge that
says, are you hungry or are you bored? Leave a sticky note above your scale that says, it's just
data. There are so many ways that you can encourage yourself using goal setting techniques. And we'll talk
more about goal setting and smart goal setting and how you can actually fuel motivation with
proper effective goal setting and focusing more on the process than the outcome.
Anyway, if you have micro notes that encourage you, then you have perhaps a macro note slash manifesto of what it
is that you intend to accomplish in the next six, three months, six months, 12 months.
Now what I do is three, six, 12, 36, and 10 plus. So basically the short window of like one month,
three months, six months, the long-term window of like a year,
the moderate term window, moderate long-term window of three years. And then the big goal of 10, I would recommend making a number of lists and putting it where you need to see it daily.
I would also recommend micro notes, but if you want to kind of bypass the planning and the sit down process of long term goal
development and cultivation, like you don't want the brainstorming session of what are
my one month fitness goals, my three month fitness goals, my six month fitness and career
goals, my three month fitness career and money goals, my my 10 year fitness career, money
and relationship goals, then do this.
Do the most basic thing.
Have a daily checklist. Do everything on the fucking checklist. Put working out on the checklist. I understand that that is very reductionist and very simplified, and there
will be days that you don't do everything on your checklist, but that's the point.
The point is if you don't do everything on your checklist, you're going to know,
and you're going to be frustrated, and you're going to do better the following day to hopefully
do everything on your checklist, which should include working out, getting in shape.
Now, hear me out. Motivation and the loss of motivation seems to be a huge reason why people
don't work out. They stop working out.
They lose steam with their workout journey, their fitness journey. Maybe they lose steam in the
pursuit of a goal. When I was looking to purchase my first home and finding a property for the gym,
I almost gave up so many times. But I had a lot of friends and I had a lot of people who were
working with me, working for me, working to help me, working to keep me motivated and saying encouraging things. Don't give up.
Hey, let's keep looking. Hey, I'm going to find something. Hey, don't get it twisted.
We got this. And so I think that there's a tremendous amount of value in surrounding
yourself with the right kind of people. And I think there's a tremendous value in surrounding
yourself with inspirational and motivational people. But the truth is there's going to be a lot of times where
your motivation to push waivers, because maybe you miss a workout or maybe you fall on your face.
And there's a little bit of a kind of, okay, gut check moment, like it's getting tough.
And this is where most people quit is when it starts to get tough, they run into a little bit of adversity and the motivation fades. And something that has been a
really good model for me in continuing to pursue challenging things, continuing to maintain a
workout habit, you know, cause as a coach, podcaster, online coach, studio owner, a fiance,
husband to be somebody who wants to have a family, somebody with two dogs.
There's a lot to do. And I'm hardly ever motivated to do all of it. That would be the biggest crock of bullshit in the world for me to tell you I'm always motivated to do all of that stuff.
Yeah, bullshit. There's so many more days where I don't want to train than I do,
but I remember the benefits of working out. And so that's kind of my third mental model is you must detach from
the physical only viewpoint or the way it affects your aesthetics viewpoint only of your training,
of your exercise, of your healthy eating. Most of you want to look better. Most of you want to
perform better. Most of you want to live longer, But most of you have forgotten that exercise is an incredibly
valuable tool for extending lifespan, healthspan, boosting mood, increasing work performance.
It is a glue. It brings everything together. You want to be better in your marriage? Be in shape,
stay in shape. It makes sex better. It keeps things in a position where hopefully as you age,
health does not deteriorate. I've
had a number of clients that I've trained who've had a partner whose health deteriorated
more quickly than theirs because they did not take care of it. And that is devastating on a
partnership, on a relationship. You want to be better in business, show up well-trained,
incorporate a regular resistance training routine, watch what happens to your discipline,
right? There's so many ways working out benefits your life outside of how you look. And if you're
only motivated to work out because it'll make you look better, good luck keeping that habit going.
It's tough guys. It's really not easy. And you're boxing yourself in. If you make the way you look
your singular motivation and rationale for training.
That's just not something that typically goes well for a long amount of time because there's
going to be a day where you're more motivated to be social, have fun, have a drink, or at least
more tempted than you are motivated to go do a grueling workout that's supposed to quote unquote
change how you look, but you know it's not going to change how you look in the long run, only in the short term, only in the long run.
So how the hell are you going to be inspired? Well, I want to look better, but it ain't going
to kick in until six months. Hell no. But a workout done well will make you feel better.
The second you walk out of the gym, it'll give you juice for the rest of the day.
feel better the second you walk out of the gym. It'll give you juice for the rest of the day.
So let me put it to you this way, folks. You need to find a way to make the things you want to accomplish with your fitness, with your career, with your relationships that are not exactly the
funnest, sexiest, and most appealing thing to do on your worst days. You need to see the benefit
in the short, intermediate, and long-term. You need to
find a way to zoom out and identify benefits and rationale for doing these things that are greater
than superficial notions. So if it's a business thing, it's probably going to have to be bigger
than just making money. If it's a fitness thing, it's probably going to have to be better than just
looking good. If it's a relationship thing, it's probably going to be a little bit beyond things
like superficial forms of attraction, like, oh, that person's hot, or, oh, I just don't want to
have too many difficult discussions. What's going on, guys? Taking a break from this episode to tell
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my app-based training community. Back to the show.
You know, like there are things that you will have to do in these elements of life that we'd
all like to be our best and improve in that are going to feel shitty on days where you're strung out and you're busy. So you need to have some resilience and you need
to have some resistance. Okay. Number four, I think that when it comes to pursuing your fitness,
pursuing a dream, pursuing a goal, there are multiple versions of yourself for whom it helps to be able to, let's say,
occupy. You need to be able to occupy a younger version of yourself, the current version of
yourself, yourself in about 10 years and yourself on your deathbed or at 90, as Peter Attia would say. And so ask yourself questions like, would the
young version of me be proud or disappointed in the current version of me for doing or not doing
the behavior? So let's say the behavior is I want a better relationship and I want better fitness.
So four times a week, I'm going to go on a one hour walk with my wife.
And we're going to talk about things that we both love. Beautiful habit, amazing thing to do with
your spouse, partner, even a non-romantic partner to deepen a relationship. Go outside, do some
activity together. You make a commitment four times a week. Okay. But you're out golfing with
the boys. Let's say you're out golfing. You have a standing date
for a walk at three o'clock, but it's one 30 and you're on the ninth hole. You're about to hit the
turn. You can play nine more and push the walk back. Okay. Or, or you can do what you said you
were going to do. And both of them are active enough, right? That it's probably not the best equivalency,
but you might be tempted to round that turn
and play nine more holes
and nothing bad would come of it.
But you blow off that meeting.
You blow off that appointment that you set.
And if you ask the younger version of yourself,
what do you want to do?
This is why I like this sliding scale.
You ask the young version,
they'll probably say, fuck it, let's play nine more holes, baby. You ask the young version, they'll probably say, fuck it. Let's
play nine more holes, baby. You ask the current version of yourself. They say, well, I don't know.
You ask the version of yourself you want to be in 10 years. What would you do? They'd probably say,
absolutely. Let's go home and do the walk. The person you want to be should be telling you to
do the thing that your conscious knows you need to do. And then if you ask your 90-year-old self, it'll say, well, I hope you spent meaningful time with
both groups of people. Instead of spending all your time golfing with your friends,
did you spend meaningful time with your wife? Did you have balance? And if there is a clear parity
between what the younger, less mature version of yourself would say and the older, more mature
version of yourself, lean into the maturity older, more mature version of yourself,
lean into the maturity. If there's ever, you know, unanimity where you're like, wow, should I,
you know, drink 20 beers this weekend and get behind a motor vehicle, the wheel of a motor
vehicle, every single version and iteration of yourself is going to say, no, no, no, no, no.
But more often than not, there's going to be a piece of you that wants to deviate from this routine. There's going to be a piece of you that wants to let down current you,
the you you'd like to be in 10 years and the you at 90 down so that current you and maybe child you
can go have a little fun. Oh, I don't want to eat my oatmeal and Greek yogurt today. I want to have
a cinnamon roll. Well, the cinnamon roll
has 400 more calories than the oatmeal and protein shake, and it has zero protein. And it's going to
send me right up against my fat macros for the whole day, but I really want it. Well, if you
have multiple people, multiple versions of yourself, let's say that you have to check in with,
I think that can be really powerful.
And I tell my clients this all the time. Especially like, let's say it's food. If you have a pantry that you share with your family and there's like a communal amount of food in there
and there's some foods in there that you don't want to eat and you have that micro note on the
pantry and says, oh, are you hungry? Are you bored? Whatever, right? That micro note is kind of acting like the version of you that you'd like to hear from in the future.
You can also just visualize like, hey, every time I go into the pantry and I eat something that's
not on my plan, and maybe you adjust down the road, so that's fine. We don't have to demonize
foods. But I eat something that's not on my plan and it sets me back. And I know what I'm doing in the moment. That version of you that you would like to become through fitness
is moving further away. And the same thing in your relationships. If you blow off obligations,
Oh, my fiance and I have like a standing date to watch football every Sunday, which is funny
because my fiance and I do, um, you know, we watch almost every game together for every team,
even our, like, even the teams
that we like, she loves the 49ers. I love the Rams. They're rivals. That's okay. Because twice
a year we get to root against each other when we play, but then every other game, I pretty much
root for the Niners on her behalf. She tries to help me root for the Rams and we watch games that
don't include our teams. And if I were to trade one of those Sundays in
here and there, it'd be okay. But the kind of person I want to be, the kind of partner I'd
like to be, and the kind of relationship I'd like to have means that most Sundays during football
season, I'm going to be with my fiance, my wife. in a couple of years, hopefully our family will be together
for those moments. And I don't see myself in the future and the version of the life that I would
like to have in the future, wanting to make in too many trades of those days. So that means on
days where I maybe know I need to record a podcast. I know that I need a film content. I know that I
want to post content, right? All of these things,
these really unique, difficult things, basically work versus family time. The more I trade work in
the version of myself that I want to be actually gets further away because the future me has more
balanced. And so I want you guys to develop a mental model
of who do you want to be in the future? What does that look like? You need to cultivate a way of
thinking about yourself in the future that you can visualize, that is positive, that is where
you'd ultimately like to be, that you check in with when you are making decisions. And that is
a practice. That's not something that you hear on a podcast and you're making decisions. And that is a practice. Okay. That's not something that you
hear on a podcast and you're just perfect. Start today with just making the characters,
make the character version of your younger self, make the character version of yourself in 10
years, make the character version of yourself at 90 and make sure that there are people, you know,
who you would like to be when you're future casting and check in with them. It can be amazing.
And I know it sounds like I'm recommending imaginary friends, which essentially I am,
but in a more serious way. Okay. Another tool that works very well is to just maintain a clear
communicable goal about what it is you want to accomplish. You've heard of smart goals,
specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, timely. Specific, I want to bench 300
pounds. Measurable, how many pounds? 300. I can measure that. Attainable, yes, I can currently
bench 280. I'm only 20 pounds away. Realistic, yes, a 20-pound increase in bench press for a
natural lifter is reasonable. Timely, I'd like to do this inside of eight weeks. Doable. A professional can always
check on that. Another example of a smart goal. I would like to be a millionaire by 30.
Let's see if that's possible. Is it specific? Yes. Why? Because it's measured as a million
dollars and it has an end point at 30. Is it attainable? We shall see. Is it realistic? Depends. If you
have $0 in your bank account and no skill, probably not. If you have $400,000 in your
bank account and a very specific marketable skill, you can earn $300,000 a year perhaps.
Well, it may very well be possible, but you might have to make some changes.
It may very well be possible, but you might have to make some changes. There's again, the time bound component at the end, I have two years. So if you aren't familiar with smart goals,
you're basically familiar with what a goal ought to look like. But the thing I forget
is, you know, and I think a lot of people forget what the smart goals is. It's not like really
easy to carry that around with you. You need to condense that goal, not into like a piece of paper, S-M-A-R-T, just be like,
I want to bench 300 pounds by this date. I want to bench 300 pounds by this date.
I want to have this much money by this date. I want to accomplish this thing by this date.
want to accomplish this thing by this date. That's what you need to break that goal down until I want to be happy with my body through my adult life. I want to take care of my finances
for my family. But you've got to take that goal, make it a sentence that you can say,
and almost turn it into a mantra. Make it communicable. Make it simple. Make it so that there is legitimately no real excuse not to be clear on that goal. What do you mean? You want to get in shape? What the hell does that mean? The amount of times I've heard that. People come into my studio.
mean? The amount of times I've heard that people come into my studio. Yeah, I'm just looking to feel better and get in shape. And that's usually what they say at first. You work with them for a
month and it's like, boom, the floodgates open. I hate the way my body looks. I want my husband
to look at me differently. I just can't do another vacation in a two piece. I need to be able to live
independently as I age. Like the real motives that you have, the stuff that you don't tell people, the reasons that you want to
get in shape, that you want to accomplish something big, that you want to cut that nasty habit that
you have, that you're having a hard time kicking. You need to get real fucking clear on that real
fast and make it communicable. I am going to change this behavior on this timeline, right?
Find whatever the smart goal, find what the goal is, plug it into the smart framework,
derive it, like distill it into a one sentence thing, write that bitch on your goal sheet,
put it on a micro note, repeat it in the car, visualize it. Look, if you are just trying to achieve your fitness goals
purely by working on things exclusively like diet and nutrition and lifestyle, like sleep,
you're going to make it there. I would pretty much guarantee it. But if you want to make it
there a little bit more easily and with a little bit more peace of mind and with a little less
like just having to grit your teeth,
having some psychological things that you can do to stay on track, not deviate, to remain
motivated, to remain inspired is a huge tool. A couple of really quick tips here to finish.
And this is for habit-based stuff. Again, this could be for picking up golf,
maintaining a fitness routine, cooking healthier, building your business, recording podcasts,
whatever. Pick your never miss days. That means you got to pick a couple of days a week that you will never miss. Never. Do this with clients all the time. I don't
have time to work out. Okay, that's fine. If there was a day of the week, gun to your head,
that you had to work out, what day of the week would you pick? Oh,
well, I'd probably pick something like Tuesday because it's my day off. Okay, so you do have
a day off. Yeah, well, I have to pick up the kids. What time do you pick up the kids? Oh,
I pick them up at three. Okay. Can you work out from one to two, shower, go pick up the kids?
Yeah, I think I could do that. Okay, that's your no miss day. Find your no miss day or days, whatever it is that you're
looking to accomplish. You're going to have to commit time to it. You're going to have to move
the needle forward with it. But most importantly, you're not going to be able to take large periods
of time away from the task. More than a week, two weeks, three weeks, a month, you'll start to go
backwards, especially with things like fitness. So pick your never miss
days, meaning that no matter how crazy or chaotic a week has been, barring any trauma or, you know,
unforeseen circumstances, you will at least move the habit and move the behavior forward
on those never miss days. This one for fitness specifically, if you just have a really difficult time seeing how you're going
to finish a workout when you're so unmotivated, this is for the days, like we're just getting
there. Like how the fuck are you going to get yourself there? Remember that if you can just
commit to a warmup, the likelihood of you not training goes way down. So drag your ass to the
car, drag your ass to the parking lot,
get your ass out of the car, get your gym bag out of the trunk, walk your ass through the door,
put your ass on the treadmill, do a five minute walk. Okay. You're warming up. You are 99 times
more likely to train. If you do that, then you are, if you are sitting on the fucking couch waiting for the motivation
to just appear, it doesn't work that way. People who are in shape know this. They just,
that's the difference. People who are not in shape think that people who are, are more motivated.
They are not. They are usually just a lot better at finding ways to make their fitness suck less
when they're not motivated. Very, very simple.
Okay. And then a final option you might have is to use the 10 minute rule,
which is to make a rule daily to commit 10 minutes towards a task you want to accomplish
towards an outcome you want to generate. I want to be a better dad. We'll spend 10 minutes a day
minimum with your kid. I want to be a better husband better dad. We'll spend 10 minutes a day minimum with your kid. I
want to be a better husband. Okay. We'll spend 10 minutes a day before bed talking to your wife
about her day. I want to be a better golfer. Okay. 10 minutes a day putting. I want to be in better
shape. Okay. 10 minutes a day walking on the bike, lifting weights, whatever. Find a 10 minute chunk
committed every day. And that works really well. Okay, folks, these are just some musings on how you
might improve motivation, stick with things and really drive habits home. And ultimately,
it can be distilled down to visualization, the making of lists, the development of characterized
versions of yourself in the past and future, who can help to hold you accountable, who you can
check in with, to remember the non-superficial benefits of your wealth goals, of your family goals, of your
fitness goals, all of these things that probably matter a lot to you. They cannot be pegged to
superficial outcomes only. Your motivation will dwindle much more quickly. You need to make sure
that you have smart goals that are distilled into communicable sentences that you
can repeat and write and that leave no questions unanswered. And some quick tips are to find some
never miss days for your habit to commit to the warmup or the smallish version of the task
possible. And to do the 10 minute rule of committing at least 10 minutes daily to the task.
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