If I Were You - 283: Prank Wars (w/Streeter Seidell!)

Episode Date: July 17, 2017

Friend and lover Streeter Seidell joins us to discuss catfishing, dick pics, and old videos.Come see our live show in Montreal! July 25 as part of JFL comedy fest.See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum podcast. I can't laugh your ass and be enlightened. There are many things that I would like to send to you, but I don't know how. And if I were you the show at Gmail.com, will they play my song? Which Gallagher brother was that? That was Lee, no not Liam or the other one. Noel? Yeah, it wasn't Liam or Noel.

It was the third Gallagher brother. Ted? That's right, Ted Gallagher. He moved to the States when the family was still in England. He moved to Miami. Right before Oasis hit. He got out of there. Yeah, he has a car dealership in the Fort Lauderdale, West Palm Beach sort of area.

It was a Saturn dealership, though. It went under. That was written by, it seems like this guy keeps coming up in our theme song search, No Joshua on Instagram and SoundCloud. Excellent. Streeter. Hey. What's up?

What's up? You're back. I'm back. When was the last time we got to record together? We haven't seen Streeter since Australia. Yeah, but we didn't record an episode there. No, you guys wouldn't let me. I kept saying I'd love to come out.

Yeah, just the timing didn't work out. The timing didn't work out. They even set up a mic for me every time. I know, and the timing just didn't work out. It sucked, because it would have been so fun. It did suck. Because I didn't get to do anything. That's the whole truth.

Yeah, the timing just didn't work out. But I'm glad it worked out now. You're in LA for like 31 hours. 31 full fun hours. And we're going to try to record this podcast for all of those hours. That's so exciting. Lock the door. Longest episode.

Time's on the clock, man. What's the record, I wonder, for longest podcast? Longest podcast episode. It's like half hours. Like live, uninterrupted? Yeah, uninterrupted, longest podcast episode record. What a shit record to have. It's like that Dave Chappelle, Dane Cook, they're like,

they did stand up for seven hours, but a lot of it was just them just like talking to the crowd. What else? What else? It was all new shit. That's the worst part. How has it been since the last time you were on the show? Have you had a son?

I don't even remember. Have you had a son since the show? Maybe. No shit. A child? Well, at the very least you have a new like moving, talking, babbling child since the show. I do.

How old is Baby Boy? How old is Baby Streeter? He's a year in change. Very good. Yeah, very good. Do you know his birthday? Like is that something you commit to memory or is it just like vaguely made? I kind of feel like my wife will remind me,

so I'm kind of not remembering it. Yeah. And when it's like, when he's like so young, it doesn't, he doesn't know. It's not like he's like, that's my birthday. Yeah. And he also doesn't know who I am. He doesn't know I'm his dad. You know, I'm a guy who's around every now and then.

So you feel like you don't need to know his birthday as long as he doesn't know who you are? Yeah, exactly. Yeah. You think it's like that much of a two way street between you and a 14 month old? There's like that much of a give and take there? Yeah. I wonder when it is, how old are you when you're first like, we got to do something for my birthday?

How do you work it out? You said he only knows the words hat and hot. I'm going to get with what Amir said there. You were, okay. I don't know, three? Three? Yeah, three. Do you know your birthday at four?

Do you remember knowing your birthday? I'll say this much. His first birthday, I made him like a dope cake. You made it? I made it. And it was like, it was a five layer cake. And there was dope in it? It took me days.

There's a lot of heroin in it. That's awesome. And I brought it out and he just couldn't care less. He definitely didn't know it was his birthday at one. But did he like the cake? No, not even. He didn't like the cake? It was heartbreaking.

Yeah, it is weird. You little ingrate. You have to do a lot of stuff for your child. And then they don't even, they can't talk. They can't express appreciation. They won't remember it. So where do you muster up that let's take baby street or to a zoo? Let's take baby street or on a trip?

I mean, the thing you should do is you shouldn't do anything until they're like five. Because that's when you start remembering things. But I think what happens is you do all this stuff when they're babies and they're not going to remember it. By the time they're five, you're just burnt, you know? And you just become a bad parent then. Yeah. And I've seen like babies at Disneyland.

Like you're carrying a two year old to Disneyland. That seems insane. It seems hard. Seems crazy. Yeah, I guess I agree with that. I wouldn't want to take like hard vacation. Like Disneyland is like lines and expensive. But I would do like, hey, we're going to go out to the country for a week.

Yeah. But that's like also a vacation for you. Right. Yeah. I would take, I'll take my vacations. With the child. To Disney World by yourself. I'm not doing Jack's ship for the kids.

Yeah. But you take him to zoos and stuff, right? Yeah. Take him to the zoo. He likes the animals. That's nice. But he also likes flushing the toilet. So it's like, you can kind of get that free.

And that costs a fraction of the price. That's just your water bill. Yeah. And you know, that's split among all the units in the building. So it's not a big deal. Oh yeah. You also moved, right? You moved.

Yeah. I changed up my whole life. The Australia tour was so upsetting to me. I got home. You had to clean the house. I said, I need to change a couple things. What's your new address? What are you working at?

What are you working at there? Well, I don't want to, I'll tell you when we're not recording. I don't think I just want to put it out there. I'll bleep it out. No, just tell us. Yeah. We'll bleep it. And you know, I'm not going to do that.

I'm afraid. What are the addresses of your houses? Mine? Yeah. 501. I'll give you a mirror. 501. 501.

502. I have our... That's a gym app. That's a gym BM� app. Alright. You've been on the show before, you get it. It's an advice show. We give advice to people that need it.

People will email us if you're hour show at gmail.com. The opening theme song mentioned that emailed twice. I will say we're running a little low again on theme songs. So if you've been sitting on a good one, send it on down to if hour show at gmail.com. These are questions we received over the past couple weeks. We have interns now at Hedgum. Did you know that? Yeah.

Oh yeah, you applied. I did, yeah. You needed college credit. Heartbreaking. I did. It really hurt my heart to see that. Tell me at least I made the short list, though. Well, you didn't get the Skype interview.

I didn't, no, I know. So we interviewed about a couple people. I never actually formally heard back, but a couple weeks went on and I just figured I wouldn't get it. It was hard to get back to everybody, so. Was there a lot of applicants? Not really.

We loved your application. The timing didn't work out. The fact that you write for SNL would have been such a perk here. But you're just. I know, so I thought that I would have been at least at the front of the pack because of that. Yeah, you three of us have the summer off.

But you're 34. You need to go and get college credit. Yeah, so yeah, that wouldn't have worked out. I understand. The timing just wouldn't have worked out. It's not a timing thing again. I think you guys are misusing that word. It's a catch-all.

We got a good one about a straight male friend receiving dick pics. What do you want to call this guy? Oh. Yeah, you get to give him a fake name. Mmm, mmm. Todd Marsh. That's good.

Todd Marsh. That's like a South Park character, right? Oh, is it? No. Randy Marsh. Yeah, Randy Marsh. All right, Todd Marsh writes, I found myself in a bit of a sticky pickle if you will.

I met this guy a few months back and we've become good friends over similar interests. It is important to note that I am gay and he is not, got it. So he is gay, friend is not. This was not an issue until he started jokingly coming onto me. He is very attractive.

So I figured it was just something hot guys do to mess around with gay men, right? Well, fast forward to Christmas and he sends me a naked picture. I mean, what is that? When I asked him why he did it, he said it was a joke. Is this something straight men do? If this was a joke, why did he,

why was he erect in the photo? I can see a flaccid snap, but a full salute? Shortly after he got a girlfriend and the joke flirting stopped. After they broke up a few weeks later though, it started again. Then for my birthday in March, he sent me another picture of himself naked.

Again, penis in hand, hard as discreet math. He swears to me that he is straight and he was just joking around. But what do I do? I like seeing his dick, but it seems very weird and makes me uncomfortable. Am I being too uptight? More recently, I also found out

that he did a similar thing leading one of his gay professors on and that he goes to gay bars to see if men will hit on him. Is this guy a straight up narcissist? Jake, as a hot man, would you do any of this? Would you do any of this? Or is he acting weird?

Do I talk to him and confront him or just ignore and maintain the status quo? I put this in your hands, best Todd Marsh. Interesting. Sorry, isn't it Stan Marsh? Stan is the kid, Randy's the dad. Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Now I've got to the question. All right, let's start with the box. Did you do it again? I do hear, I don't send nude photos to gay people, but I do hear, I feel like people have friends that are like, yeah, his dick's always out, he's always sending me dick pics. I mean, we had a joke going for a while

that I think I started where I would text one of you guys as if I was texting my wife and just opened the wrong thing with like a little sexy message in a picture and then that led to a flurry of, I wouldn't call them dick pics, but like very close. What's the one where you opened a hotel door once and me and Jake were like naked? Oh, yeah, yeah.

Those are two different, oh wait, there was, the one picture that you have, like you're like. You got to turn your naked leg on your bed. Straighter head, like you sent like a lazy eye photo like above your head where you could see like your whole entire butt being covered. I liked to cross my eyes and I thought it was funny. And then there was that other time

when Streeter came to our hotel room and we answered the door completely naked. Yeah. And I don't remember if you did this or if we just talked about how funny it was later, but you like walked in and started pretending to take a photo of it. We talked about how that thing to do would have been,

or to just try to grab your dick, which would have been the ultimate comeback to that. It feels like there's a difference between like new to be in dick stuff and then actively. Sending someone. Sending hard dick pics to one individual person who in their life would be attracted to that kind of thing.

Yeah. It is a sticky pickle. It is fucking weird. I think it's weird as fuck. It's a weird thing, because you're like, I mean, I guess the only thing to do is make a move on the guy and see what happens. Right, see if you like put his money where his mouth is.

But like doing this, it doesn't mean that he's gay. It means that he likes the attention. Yeah. The fact that he goes to the gay bars, that makes that like, I'm like a little further down the path of thinking like, this guy might just be gay or bi or something. Right.

Yeah, if you like gay attention so much at a certain point, are you just gay? I guess the question is, does he do this to women too? Like is he sending his female friends just like dick pics? If he did this to a woman, would he be like, that's illegal, that's harassment. Well, that's not really what I was saying. Oh, my gosh.

But if a woman was complaining about this, would be like, this guy's a fucked up weird pervert, but the fact that he's a gay guy, it's like, I don't know what to feel about it. Yeah, yeah, but I think that's just contextually, because this guy, if this guy was like, it really bothers me, I hate seeing his dick, then we would say it is harassment,

but he's like, I like seeing his dick, I want that. Yeah, he likes this guy. But I'm confused about the message that it's sending me. So what can he say? What do I do? Can you say stop sending me dick pics? I guess you just send some dick pics back. Yeah, maybe send one back and see what happens.

Yeah, that's like, that's the tit for tat thing. Like just cause he sends the dick pic, doesn't mean you should like grab his dick and suck it, you know? Yeah, the version, like the trying to relate to this would be a woman sending you naked photos. Right. Would that make you uncomfortable?

You like seeing her naked body, but it seems very weird and makes me uncomfortable. Well, it would be a lesbian sending me them, because that's the confusion. Like why is someone who I know isn't interested in me, sending me signals that she would be, and is it like totally to tease me and to fuck with me? And if it is the case, then do you-

Or to just be a friend. What's that? Or to just be a really good friend. Yeah, that's interesting too. If someone's like, hey, I know you love the way my dick looks. And I'm your boy, so I'm gonna send you a photo. I know you're attracted to me, it's never gonna happen, but you know, if you wanna take a peek, like here you go.

You can jerk off to this if you want. Yeah, do with it what you will. And work closer. If a lesbian sent you photos, you wouldn't be like, stop doing that. No, I wouldn't. That is so disgusting of you. Wow, but like that's awful.

That's not what this guy is asking to hear. This is, I would report it to the police, the FBI, the DOJ. Am I being uptight, he asks. I guess it's your body, so you can do whatever you want. It's weird to be like, you're being uptight. Do I talk to him and confront him about it or ignore it? You can't ignore it. You can ignore it.

Well, you gotta write something back. Yeah, I think you respond with the dick pics. You like keep it to sex. Call his bluff. Yeah, you don't need to turn this into a whole thing. Yeah. Yeah, I think he's maybe stressing out about it. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, thank you. Nice. Shlong. I saw you writing that one down. Yeah, downstairs. Do you think this guy's actually really hot? Is he a dime? Yeah.

Is he two nipples? I mean, gay clubs. A quarter of a quarter. He mentioned how, he mentioned that he's a hottie, right? That's true. Maybe this dude should just take the free dick pics, I guess. That's what I think. If it's not really bothering him.

Right. It just seems like it's not really upsetting him. It's more confusing him. And the confusion is, he said he doesn't want to fuck me, but he sends me nude photos. So you know what? Maybe just take him at his word. He doesn't want to fuck me, but he wants to send you nude photos.

Could just be like an exhibitionist and he trusts you enough that he's like, look, this is how I get off. Showing my dick to people. You don't have to take it any steps further. You just enjoy the free nude photos. Is it illegal to send someone a nude photo of yourself? I don't know, but there's no idea. There's some kind of, yeah, I mean.

It's like an interesting exposure. I mean, I guess it'd be an unsolicited nude photo would be. Illegal? Maybe. I guess it's kind of like just whipping your dick out on the street, right? That's illegal. Yeah. For some stupid reason.

Yeah, like you did that and like, I wasn't offended. No, I know. But that's not the debate that you have to have. But the mayor of New York freaked out. This guy, this guy has said that he likes the dick pics. So that's not the question, is this legal or is it bad? Yeah, I'm just thinking out loud. Yeah.

Well, I don't want to wade into these fucking weedy Marsh swamp disaster. Todd Marsh. Todd Marsh. All right. It's quicksand and I'm going to get sucked down. Here's another good question from a lady. Street, do you have a lady's name? Yeah, I do.

It's awesome. Jessica Wrench. Todd Marsh and Jessica Wrench. Jessica writes, my friend wants to fuck my mom. Huh? We work together in retail and my mom, who's a hottie, often comes to the store to say hi. He is 23, she is 53.

My friend saw my mom and now he won't stop telling me how hot she is. Now my friend is a goddamn dime, more than attractive enough for approval for my mother and I want her to have a fulfilling sex life. However, I'm not sure how to get my mom fucked by my friend without it being weird. Thanks for your help. This is interesting because she's still married to her dad. Wow. Yeah.

I assume it's a single mom. It's weird that the question is like, how can I get my mom laid without it being weird and not like, what do I do about this dude? How do I stop this from happening at all costs? It seems like because it's coming from a female writer, it's less weird than like a bro hooking up his mom with another bro. Because it's a daughter helping a mom get laid, it feels a little more wholesome. If the tables were turned and your dad was single, would you try to set him up with one

of your friends' friends? Right. And yours is junior? Yeah, that's the question. I guess I would. That'd be hot. My dad or yours? Either one.

I just want to blow my dad. Set up our two dads on a date. Is that crazy? Should our dad 69? Our mom and dad have already kissed each other. Right, so this is just the next evolution of that. Yeah, would you hook your mom up with a male friend? With one of my friends?

No. OK, so not even me? No. OK, so like, what if I just wanted to take your mom out for like a steak dinner? No. OK, what if it was like a breakfast date? That's fine. Yeah, that's steak and eggs.

That's fine. With your mom. Steak and eggs in the morning. It's always steak. I don't want to give her the beef. No, my mom likes steak. You know my mom. Thin as hell and medium rare.

There's something so upsetting about, and it just hits my ear wrong, about I want my mom to have a fulfilling sex life. Why? Don't want anything in terms of your mom's sex life. Just don't. She already made you. Yeah, she already got laid. Jake, this seems like something you'd want to do for your mother.

Yeah. If you had to choose a friend of yours to set your mom up with, who would it be? No one. Of course. Because you got to kiss that friend goodbye after that. That's done. You can't be friends anymore. No, I guess I would not.

Because he is your daddy. Yeah, I mean, he's been in the place where you came from. I would not, in any way, shape or form, facilitate somebody railing my mom. If somebody was really looking for a loving relationship and was going to treat my mom like the angel that she is and do away with my nasty father once and for all. Banish him? Then maybe I'd help. But like, if it's just like a high rent.

It's like a fucking washboarded abs 22 year old that wants to fucking pork my mom and never call her. Wow. Like, that's not a fulfilling sex. Like, I don't know. I mean, if this girl's mom is that hot, right, that this dude 30 years younger than her is cream in his jeans about it. I'm sure she has a fulfilling sex life this girl doesn't know about.

Right. You know, I'm sure she's out doing just fine. It's presumptive to think that like your mom's not having sex and you can get her. Yeah, and she needs your help. 23 seems young to like want to set up with a mom. 23 is like, you know, still young. Yeah, but if it was a 53 year old rich dude, you would be like, oh, this is hot. It's a sexy 23 year old.

Yeah, you're not very woke. Guys take longer to mature. That would have been that would have been a good prank wars if I dated your mom. Oh, yeah. Would you have seen that coming? I feel like my dad would have been upset about it. I think that might have been a dead giveaway, right? Yeah.

Do you ever ruin enough relationships in street or something? Would that be a would that be a good? Actually, we wanted to talk about the prank wars and this could be a good segue into it. Oh, yeah. I'm suddenly I'm suddenly nervous. Is there something weighing on your conscience? It wasn't really weighing on my conscience, but it is. It is.

It does feel freeing or liberating to talk about. I do feel nervous right now. Really? I do too. I'm wondering about potential blowback. Yeah, there's a little blowback. Yeah, maybe some blowback guys. I think I think there's going to be a lot of people out there that are.

Well, I mean, we don't even know what we're discussing. Right. So why don't I I'll conduct an interview. If we can move on from this question, I feel like we help this person out. Sure. Don't interfere. Let's conduct an interview about the prank war. OK, do you think everybody listening knows what they are?

Let's set that up. Tell me what the prank war is. Prank war. Series of eight videos we made for College Humor, where Streeter and I alternate pranking each other. And they were getting they got increasingly more vicious, I would say, and more ambitious as they went on. Yeah, started innocuous, vicious and ambitious. Yeah.

What do you think was the meanest one? The meanest prank war. I think the audition, Amir's fake audition for a sketch that didn't exist. Yeah, that was bad because that was the most embarrassing. Yeah, that was, I think, embarrassing. Yeah. And maybe meanest was convincing the skydiving one. Yeah.

The skydiving where you had Streeter's skydiving instructor guy tell him that the shoot didn't open, that he was going to die. Yeah, yeah. And when you thought of these ideas, what was the process of when you guys were thinking of the prank war pranks? So that's the thing. That's the big. That's the meat.

That's the thing we need to get off our chest after 10 years. Do you want to say it? How did you deliver it? I think why don't we say it? What's that? I think you should say it. It's your podcast. Do you want me to say it because you feel bad?

Like this absolves you of any of the guilt? I don't feel bad necessarily. I do feel like we got a free TV show off a lie. That's true. We did a lie. Well, yeah. Yeah, the secret's a lie. So the big secret, which is, I mean, it's not really, I mean, it is a secret in that.

No one else knows. Yeah, well, some people. You know, we told a few people. Like our friends knew, is that the prank word videos were all fake. They were not real. We faked it. Now that's a bit of a bombshell. Yeah, and the question is.

Not for you because you knew. So you're just as guilty as we are of lying to people. I remember still during the Yankee pranky, which was, that was when you put on the billboard a proposal to Streeter's girlfriend at the time. Will you marry me? That displayed during like the seventh inning stretch. And then like street, there's a whole thing like Streeter's like, I don't want to marry you.

I said, she said yes. I said, I said, no, she hit me in the face. Yeah, right. There was a bunch of videos on my computer because you guys used my computer to edit it. And there's a lot of really incriminating videos of like where it's you filming Streeter and then him filming. Yeah, we didn't have a very big budget for some of those early ones. Yeah, I shoot the intro of Streeter being like, all right, all right, Streeter was shooting

me being like, all right, what Streeter doesn't know is blah, blah, blah, and that Streeter is like, all right, say that again, but like do it like this. So these were all like videos that Streeter and I basically wrote together. We planned them out and then we would execute them as if they were real and then we would edit them together. And they were real in the sense that we had to do all the embarrassing stuff like I did have to get. You still perform stand up like for people like Dead Silent Crowd that was booing you.

Then you had to put that video online. Yeah, so there was like the Skydive instructor really did make the parachute malfunction in a way that I was spinning around and almost passed out. Don't get my ear. And my ear did hurt. But you knew that he would do that. But I knew that, you know, I wasn't really going to die. Right.

Here's the question. I mean, I like 90% knew because it's still Skydiving, so there's always a chance. Yeah. To me, like I remember the first one ever where you like spliced in, Amir was listening to your I.T. You spliced in audio of you having sex. So that's the thing. We started it with the idea that no one would believe it and then we could make them more

and more insane. Right. I remember like that one was almost the sketch idea. It was basically a sketch and the idea was going to be like, we'll pretend we have this prank war going, but everyone will know it's fake so then we can just have insane things happen to each other. But then people believed it for some reason. Which still happened.

You still had insane things happen. But the difference was that everybody. So you were surprised when people were like, they're like, well, that like people think this one's real. We should do like a revenge one. And that was like when I set you up on a date and stand you up. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Which like he also. That was crazy. That was pretty funny. Because you had a girlfriend at the time. So there were so many holes in this lie. And then by the time we got to the basketball shot one where I shoot a basketball shot blindfolded and you tell the whole crowd to cheer, the whole crowd thought it was real. They all thought it was real.

I always thought the most famous one. Everyone played along so well. The whole school thought it was real. Yeah. We got to lie to the school. The school really thought they were messing with you. Right. Which is so vicious.

Right. I felt kind of bad. When we left the arena, I felt like we had like pulled off a bank heist because we're like walking. Holy shit. It's over. It's done. We did it.

Remember we went to, we had a hotel room and we just went there and edited the video. Right. Immediately. Yeah. I always felt like that was the best acting I ever did in prank war. And I could never, I could never be like, see, look, I got a decent actor here. That's the, that was the annoying part, which is why it feels a little good to get off our chest.

Like the one where I'm, the human giant one where we shoot a human giant sketch. Oh yeah. Where I'm like crying at the end. I'm like, this is like really realistic. You go, I mean, I should win some kind of webby for this. But everyone's like, look at a mirror, that little bitch, you can't even start crying. And I don't, I can't be like, well, I wasn't really crying. What about the one where you like, you, your audition tape.

Yeah. That's my, I love that one. It's basically a comedy scam. Yeah. It's so obvious. Like, do they actually think I did like a Robin Williams impression? Andy Bloom. Yeah.

Andy Bloom. Oh, there's an inside joke in prank where that we can finally talk about. Which is what? Your name is always wrong in some way. Oh, really? People, you know what I mean? People say like a Neil and a Meyer and stuff. Was there ever a prank word that you guys were like, this is, this is the one that's

going to out us. Like this, everyone's going to call this one out as fake. People are going to know. I thought the skydiving one was a little, oh, in the standup one, Pete told the audience that it was fake. Everyone there knew. Everyone at UCI. Like, don't worry, this is a fake prank, but we're going to, because people are going

to feel too bad. Yeah. Actually don't laugh. Don't worry. Streeter knows about it. Yeah. And then we're like, oh, shit. I hope these people don't tell anybody.

We were really just, I mean, and then that guy wrote that article in like the New York Times about how these are fake and like he was like trying to interrogate us and grill us. Remember, we had this interview is like, oh, yeah, if these were real, would you really like what if Amir was in the bathroom during the Maryland prank? Right. Like, would you really risk the whole thing? And then you're like, yeah, I guess I would have been fucked if you went to the bathroom.

And he's like, oh, cut, I cut you. I know that guy. I forgot about that. There's been so many times, I remember, because we went on Kimmel for two of these. I think that's when I felt the worst. That's when I felt the worst. Because he's like a respected peer of viewers. Because he's awesome.

He's very cool, nice dude. But we kind of had to keep our lie going because it was like, what are we going to do? Yeah. Right? You know, we're like on TV talking about these pranks. And if it came out at that point, if it came out then, I feel like we would be in trouble because we both still worked for College Humor and we had like people were watching the videos and we were like.

There was like ad money tied up in this lie all of a sudden. Not that we got any of it, but there was ad money involved. One was the last guy to have a lesson out of it. Was it almost seven, eight years ago? I mean, it was a long time ago. Prank War 8 came out. So are you still pretty funny? Are you not going to prank Amir back?

I'm still going to get Amir back eventually when his guard's down. It'll be nice to not lie to just random people anymore. I stopped lying. People were like, so when Streeter did that thing, were you like, oh, those aren't real. And they're like, what? It's always like I punched them in the face, like, what are you, why? Anybody I was honest with got immediately mad at me. Yeah.

And they would be like, why did you tell me? I think they're mad because they like being on our team or your team and they don't realize that like the whole time it was kind of a prank on them. They don't want to be the butt of the team. I don't want to. I don't like to think of it that way. That's the ultimate prank war. Yeah.

I like to think of it. The prank war was the two sides. It was not Streeter versus Amir. It was Streeter and Amir versus the public. Yeah. No, that's not what it was. And now it's time for them to get us back. It was entertainment.

Entertainment. Yeah, sure, entertainment. For the masses. Now you can rewatch them and you can, you know. You can spot where it's clearly fake. Which ones are real? Which ones are fake? And I don't know.

Hopefully you can watch it with a new appreciation. After basketball, what happened? Was that skydiving? Yeah. Yeah. And then it just stopped. Yeah. I mean, the basketball one was the best prank of all time.

Yeah, the best. I think so. I think that was, and then- That was a highlight. Even knowing it was a prank, it was such an exciting moment because like we got an entire 20,000 person arena cheer. I know. It was great.

Who shot that? Is it shot really, really well too? Matt Pollock? Was it? Matt Pollock and Creighton. Creighton. Creighton. Like the way they catch that one.

Did any part of you think that there was a chance that the ball was going to go in? Yeah. I was hoping it would go in. I shot it to go in. Really? I just missed it by a lot. What would have happened to the prank? I guess it would have been even better, I think.

Yeah. It would have been even more disappointing because then, you know, if they weren't real, I'd be like, you got it, but it's not actually real. You have to somehow get the cash. Yeah. That one's fun because that, even though now we're saying that we faked it, that one has been done for real to people. Yeah.

And people were like inspired to do it. Oh, cruel. Yeah, very cruel. Who thought of that one? I actually don't remember brainstorming that. Is that your idea? I don't remember either. Or mine.

I don't remember. I remember coming up with most of them together, like having a starting point and working it out. It's your shot. It's your shot. That dude was great. That's what I think that said. The little announcer, dude.

Yeah. And I think the way I missed it was very cinematic because it like floats out of frame and then lands like eight feet to the left of the basket. It's so satisfying. It's really a fun one to watch. Yeah, just watching it now. And then you run around like a total dork. Yeah.

Like a real doofus. I still have that weird Marilyn face mask and the t-shirt that we got. The fact that you come out with the check, it was really, really good. The check? Where is the check? It was in our office for so long. You hugged the mascot. The turtle.

You can't even believe it. Down on the knees. I remember we almost cut that part because it seemed kind of fake. Yeah. That was always when we were editing because it was like, is that too fake? Does that look fake? Well, that's the thing. Before the baseball one, we could do it as much as we wanted it.

We can like, all right, let's re-shoot that because it didn't seem real. But with the baseball one, we're like, all right, I hope your girlfriend can slap you well because this is all we got. And then the basketball one, we definitely couldn't do it again. I mean, yeah. That was the first one we had to edit overnight because we were like, people are going to talk about it. Yeah, people were tweeting and people had video of it and they're putting it online

and stuff. Wow. This is a great prank. It really is. Half a million. Maybe we should edit this part out of the podcast. All right. I still enjoy these.

Maybe we'll do another one. Look how much fun we were having. So young. So happy. You look nice, dude. Goddamn it. Weird run and then you just fall. Yeah, slap the floor.

Maybe that's what we cut. I remember we talked about doing one more that was, it would have been so hard to pull off, but it was fake plane crash. Oh. Where you were on it, we would charter a full plane. Wow. And have the pilot make it seem like the plane was going to crash. I had, did I ever tell you this idea or did we ever discuss it where I went to a doctor

and the doctor had to give me emergency surgery and I woke up and you would wake me up without a dick. You would put prosthetics over my dick and I would look up and it would have no dick. And then the walls of the office, the walls of the hospital open up and I'd be live on stage. 2000 people cheering the fact that I'm not a dick. Grab a scalpel and try to kill yourself. Let's shoot that one.

Let's do it. Just cut this whole chunk out. If you're listening, don't tell anybody. Don't tell anyone. We still want to do them. Don't keep a secret. College Humor needs it. College Humor prank where seven view from the student section.

See somebody, they were leaking the video. Oh my God. Well, that has a lot of views. I know. This has more views than the actual prank. We should have used this clip. It monetized it. This guy's a millionaire off my fucking video.

But we hosted a clip show on MTV for five seasons based on our reputation as pranksters. Maybe now we'll get a reboot since you guys have revealed that you've pranked the masses. We kind of became prank experts without ever actually having to prank each other. Have you ever been actually pranked or have you ever actually pranked someone? Yeah, but not at that level. No, yeah. Even though the pranks are fake, you still brainstormed real pranks. Yeah, we were just too scared to pull them off for real.

Doing these things was embarrassing as it were, even though I knew what was going on. Super embarrassing and tense. Yes. Especially the ones that we can only shoot once in front of 20,000 people that we hope play along. Or just, again, almost passing out in the sky. Yeah. I would not have done that.

I would not be like, yeah, I'll skydive and we'll just fuck with me or go around in a loop-de-loop and the guy will try to fuck with me. God, that was so scary. Yeah, so scary. All right. All right. Well, great. It's nice to get that off our chest.

Same. I have big regrets about talking about it now. Already? We haven't even released it yet. I know. Yeah. And I don't think we should. Well, we'll talk about it.

If you're listening to it, you know which way we decided. Let's take a break. We'll come back and we'll try to answer one more question with Streeter. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Thank you, BetterHelp. You're finding yourself in a difficult, anxious, stressful situation talking to a professional licensed therapist is the best way to navigate yourself out of that difficult place. And it's not necessarily easy to find a therapist, especially one in your area, but BetterHelp

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And it's extra affordable. That's betterhelp.com. Check him out. Thanks, BetterHelp. Thank you to Squarespace for sponsoring this episode of our show. Wow. For years and years and years, we've been ranting and raving about Squarespace because it's the best way for dummies like me and potentially you that don't necessarily know how to code

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Let's launch it. Just use that offer code if I were you to save 10% off that first purchase. Thank you, Squarespace. And we're back. How was SNL this year? It was great. Who was your favorite host? Oh man.

You can't say because of his favoritism. Yeah. All right. So let me ask you a different question. Yeah. What was it like to hang out the rock? I love the rock. He was awesome.

Do you call him the rock? No. Do you call him Rocky? I call him Mr. Johnson. Really? Very cool. And he's coming to your office and just talking to you? Call him President Johnson.

He's very chill. He's cool. Is he charismatic? Yeah. Extremely. So does it seem fake at all? No. He wants to know the name of everybody.

Even if it is... Is fake? It's so good. It's so good that I don't care. Hopefully that's the reaction to it. That's the poll quote. It's so good. Even if it is fake, it's so good.

I don't care. Yeah. Do you have a fun rock story or just a small anecdote? I don't have a fun... I have a fun Aziz story. Okay. Go ahead. Hopefully he's cool with me talking about this.

We did a sketch. Mikey and I wrote a sketch with him where he played like a Chuck E. Cheese. Oh yeah. The animatronic band? Yeah. The singer in the animatronic band, his name was Pepe Ronnie. Pepe. And he sang like annoying songs about pizza.

Okay. And... Oh, like pepperoni. Yeah, yeah. And he sent me like... I want to say 75 audio messages of him singing pizza songs in the voice. Like... Don't you want some pizza?

And they were coming in so fast. Like they were coming in one every 45 seconds. For like an hour. Or like an hour and then more the next day. After the sketch aired too. Yeah. I think he sent me some next week. It was really funny.

That's fun. I don't know if he wanted to put him in or if he was just doing it to make me laugh. Does the rock know your name? What's it like? Does he call you Mr. Seidel? I don't think he knows my name. Maybe remembered it just for the week. Oh, that's awesome though.

I don't think he'll remember it if I saw him right now. He's a big guy though, right? Taller than you. He's a big, strong guy. Yeah, I let him know how much you like big, strong macho man. Do you think he could put both of your hands around his arm? Or too big? I don't think so.

Too big, right? I'm being serious. I don't think I could. Yeah, he's awesome. So big. I love the rock. How do you feel about Sina? Because we had Sina this year too.

Who? John Sina. I don't know who that is. You don't know who that is. You don't know who John Sina is. The smell. It doesn't matter who John Sina is. Do you guys watch wrestling or are you just watching?

No, I'm just a huge fan of the Tooth Fairy. What did he do wrestling? You did wrestling? The rock was in the Tooth Fairy? What? The rock was in the Tooth Fairy. The rock was the Tooth Fairy. I don't remember this at all.

That's the presidential oppo research. Yeah, watching the Tooth Fairy. Nobody's watched it. All right, that's a good story. And you're still there. You just finished your third year? Yeah. And now next year will be your fourth?

Hopefully. Holy shit. Yeah, hopefully. David S. Pumpkins, man. Part two. Changed your life. That's on the first line of your obituary, right? David S. Pumpkins changed my life.

Let's, Pumpkins also fake? Not even a guy that's also fake. I hate to say it. They're really... Fuck. Yeah, it's not a real guy. It was Tom Hanks. Fuck.

The actor. Yeah. I'm gonna be buried alive for that. Anything else you want to talk about before we get back into it? No, just having fun hanging out with you guys. Finally. Finally. It's been since New Zealand, man.

Oh, yeah. Did we even talk about that? I had the worst day, by the way, because I left like two days before you guys were three days. Yeah. I had a travel day that was 26 hours by myself straight through not talking to anyone so easily. It was a red eye from Sydney to LA, and then like a five-hour layover, and then a five-hour

flight. A five-hour layover where I was falling asleep in the airport, and then a flight from LA to New York, just all by myself, no one to talk to. Oh, God. How many movies did you watch? I watched like nine movies, I want to say. Back to back to back to back to back. But I did take a shower at the airport, which was great.

How great is that? Dude, did you jerk off? Did you get a private toilet, too? Did you jerk off in the shower? I did not, because I was so tired. You got a jerk off in the private shower. Yeah. I feel like...

I don't want to, because I don't want other people to do that, so you're jerking off in the airport. You're jerking off in the airport. Every time. All right, now I can't... I don't want to use them. What about the airplane? Ever joined the half-mile high club?

Obviously, yeah, obviously, because we talked about, remember our invention, airplane arm? A fake arm. Jerk off on a plane. Jerk off on a plane. Jerk off on a plane. You don't need the fake arm. You could probably just jerk something out. Do you want to hear a crazy thing?

Sure. This is a true crazy thing. Okay. I was in Florida with my wife and child, and on the flight home, there was a couple sitting across the aisle from us, and they were straight up having sex. No. On the plane, they got in trouble for it. Like a blanket over both of them, and shoes on as well.

Blanket, yeah. Yeah. And then we kind of looked over, and we saw their shorts were around her ankles. Oh, my God. And they got like a weird, like a plane citation, you know, like they came out with a thing, and they're like, we are warning you. A day flight or a night flight? It was a day flight.

So it was brightly lit. From Miami to New York. It was not like an overnight, everyone's asleep anyway. I guess it was like dusk, maybe? We were delayed a while. These people were insane. They spilled like four drinks. Oh, they were wasted.

They were wasted on Coke, going, hitting a vape in the bathroom together. They got in trouble for being in the bathroom together. They were eating candy, like eating so much candy, and she was gorgeous. She was like a six foot tall model. Oh, my God. She was like Chrissy Teigen. And then the dude looked like a weird, like DJ type looking, you know, like super skinny and like kind of balding.

Yeah. Was it a rich Avicii man? I didn't recognize him. It might have been a movie. That was my theory. It was balding. It was probably Chrissy Teigen. No, there was animal products in some of that candy movie.

So you saw them fucking? Yeah, but they were like fucking for a minute, and then people were like, the flight attendant had to come over and be like, you need to get back in your seat. Oh, really? It's so weird. At that point, you're just like a kindergarten teacher. No, you cannot do that. They asked my wife, like the flight attendant asked Vanessa if she wanted to press charges

because we had a baby with us. Wow. And they were like, if you want to press charges, they can be arrested when we get off. And she was like, I mean, no, not really. Wow. I don't want to get involved in this. I'm good. What if you could have gotten 50 grand for that?

Well, I don't know if they would have to pay us. For emotional trauma, I'm sure they would have to go through something else. Maybe, yeah. I mean, they definitely had money. They definitely had money. Yeah. They got to be not cheap. You got to be really rich.

And that much candy at Hudson News with a markup. You're either really rich or really poor if you reach that level of, I don't give a fuck. It was what was crazy is we were in first class because I had like a companion ticket. So I, I cheaped out, but I was like, wow, the shit they let you get away with in first class is insane. Wow. Because they'd gotten trouble, but like didn't get arrested. They were able to like leave the plane and just go into the world.

I wonder how they told this story. Like, yeah, we fucked on the way down here. I don't think they remember it. I mean, they were making out so hard from the second they got on the, on the flight. We knew it was going to be a fun one. That's so fucking weird. So fucking hot. Anyway.

All right. Let's try to answer one last question. Okay. It would be a waste to have Streeter here. This is a, a, a male. Okay. Oh. In Kansas City, Tommy Socks, I think I'm starting to understand your, your technique here.

I look around the room. Long time listener, customer, investor, and most importantly friend, fuck wrong show. I'm a 24 year old male who recently got catfished in Kansas City. It's not a traditional catfish in the sense that it's a completely different person behind the smoke show profile. So let me explain. I was browsing Bumble, right? And I happened to match with a smoke show, no bio, which was a little suspect at first.

But half of the users don't even start a conversation. Not even a day later, she sends me a message and we start a good conversation and things are going well. I don't overplay my hand and she asked for my number. At this point, things are looking really good. I wait a week before asking her out and we plan on getting drinks. And this is where it all goes down. I arrived to my surprise.

I wasn't looking at the girl, I wasn't looking at the girl in the pictures at all. Not to be an asshole, but she was thick, like really thick, a hundred pounds thicker than her profile pictures. This is where it gets complicated because I did enjoy our conversations and she is genuinely a chill person. I was turned off by the fact that she lied and even, and even though it's a bit petty, I'm not attracted to her at all. So my question is, how do I break it to her that I'm not interested in a relationship

without sounding like an asshole? Then how do I ask her to be friends because she is chill and has hot friends herself? Oh, you can't have both ways. What would you do? What would you do? I like that I call that being catfished, fatfished. Nice. Oh, I should leave right now.

Save it. Pitch that to MTV tomorrow. Why would I go to MTV? It's a great name for a TV. We're never going to work with you again after this prank or shit. Would you say something if you were like, you met up with a girl and she's like, not her? Would you be like, this isn't you?

Or would you like have a weird date and just leave for her? It's not like it was a completely different person. It was like she used old photos before she had gained weight. Right. Or it was just a different, heavier human. If it was a different person, would you say something? Yes. If it's a different person, but if they gained, that's the difference.

This person is the person in the photos they just gained weight, which makes them a different person. Jesus. I feel like I wouldn't even have the courage to like call that person out if they were a completely different person. Yeah. I'd be like, hey, let's get a drink. Get a drink and leave.

I wouldn't be like, this isn't you. This isn't you. I'm not sitting here. Hey, you're fat. Hey, what the heck? Because she's like, yeah, it is me. I just gained weight. I don't want to have that conversation.

Well, I mean, that's the, but if this person obviously could tell that it was her and she'd gained weight, so you don't say anything then, but if it's like a different human, what would you do? A completely different person? I would say something. Yeah. I feel like you have to. What would you say?

I would say, what the fuck is going on? I might just roll out of there and not even engage. So she's like, hey, say this is me. I'm Laura. And I would be like, can I ask you a question? Is that you in the pic? Like, no, it's not. Is it not?

Look at, yeah, but then he was so attracted to her chatting that he doesn't know what to do. I think, you know, like the right thing to say is like, well, if she's such a great person, whatever, you know, like if she's so great, then you, if you like her that much as a person, then you can overcome that, but probably not. You have to be attracted to the people you're dating. You know, you have, that's like level one is like, am I attracted to this person? Yes.

Cool. Yeah. But I think at this point is like, can I just be friends with her? Of course. That's, that is the course. That's the best question. Yeah. Sure.

If she's cool, but you're not physically attracted to her and you want to be her friend, then that's the answer. So how do I break it to her that I'm not interested? This dude's a little scummy that he's like, and she has hot friends. Yeah. Yeah. If you left out that one line, it'd be like, oh, okay, you're, this is the right thing to do.

But it's like, do you want to be friends with her because you like her because you want to get with her friends? Yeah. Chill on the friends. Like that. Yeah. I'm not saying it can't happen, but let's just not make that the M.O. from the get go. Yeah.

Let's not make that the goal and the target. Yeah. We sometimes talk about dating app ideas. What about one where you choose a photo of anything you want? So everybody's catfishing everyone. The bio is real. Conversations are real, but the photos are not. Oh, you have an avatar that's just a hot person.

That's right. I like that. That's an interesting idea. So you just choose of like a stock photo of a hot guy or girl. Yeah. So everyone is just sort of hot. Based level, assume that the person that they're talking to is really hot. But then I think-

And then you actually get to know their personality. Right, chat. I do think that would be full of all ugly people. That's right. Of course. Because hot people don't need to use the fake. Right. Like you and I would be on that, Jake would be on a real one.

I think that people that are hot that usually get the benefit of the doubt just based on how hot they are might enjoy an app where they're like, hey, someone's going to get to know me for me. That's right. But then some fucking troll shows up and they're going to be like, oh, I'm not going to get with this. You know what would be cool? The more messages you exchange, like you unlock different, like little pixels of-

Oh, that's fuck. Yeah. That's real good. Wasn't that something? Like when you get to a thousand messages exchanged, like that's when the photo reveals itself. So it's like really pixelated and then the picture becomes clearer and clearer. I love the more you message.

Yeah. I'd like to invest. All right. We're in. $100. Yeah. What's that artist where you can't really tell what it is until you're far away? Monet.

That's right. We'll call it time is Monet. Why would you just call it Monet? George Serrat maybe does that too, right? Serrat was an early adapter for pointillism, which was kind of- Early adapter. I thought he was like fucking invented. An art nouveau.

It swept Renaissance posts. Did he do shit in Photoshop? He didn't have Photoshop because he was born in 1712, but what he did was a lot of oil- When did Photoshop get invented? 88. Yeah. 1788? No, it was 1988.

By Adobe? George Adobe. Yeah. What was Photoshop 1.0 like? Anyway, so you can say, I don't want to hang out with you. I'm not interested, but maybe we can be friends. That's not an asshole. That might be a problem for her though.

She might be like, well- Sure, she didn't have to be your friend. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. I guess put the ball in her court. Yeah. You're just here for friends. All right.

That's fair. That's safe. And then once you're really good friends, hit her with it. Be like, you fucking lied to me. Yeah. Remember when you lied to me? You were fat. Why did you put up these hot pics?

You're so fat. You know, it really makes me feel bad. Until you have a nice, meaningful friendship, and then you can destroy it. Yeah. You unload. Yeah. Streeter. Anything to shout out before you go?

White wine? I don't, I mean. I think it's still online somewhere. Talk about all our old projects. Yeah, I mean, I guess- Was white wine fake? White wine was not fake. All right, good.

Do you want people to watch it? I'd love for people to watch SNL when it comes back. There's a show called Saturday Night Live that Streeter rates for. It's on- 11.30 p.m. Saturday night. On ABC? On NBC. Oh, NBC.

Peacock, baby. That's cool. How long has that show been on? A couple years ago. 43. 43. Yeah. It's been on for a minute.

But it's just starting to get good now. And it's right. They finally figured out like a lot of the characters. Yeah. Yeah. We cracked it. Cool. All right, thanks for having me.

Thanks for having me. Again, we need your theme songs. If I were you show at gmail.com. For theme songs, questions, prank war was fake. We'll be back next week. Oh, we're going to Montreal. We should say that we're going to Montreal. Are you going to Montreal?

Yeah. I'm not. No, I wasn't invited. You guys didn't invite me. Time didn't work out. Montreal July 25th is our If I Were You show. And then a head gum showcase. Twinnovation and Gabriel will be there.

Remember Gabriel? Yeah, man, I love Gabriel. Yeah. That show will be on July 26th. You should just come up. Take a train. Yeah, maybe I will. I'd love to have been invited, but...

It is the timing. The timing didn't quite work out. The timing didn't click. Cool. We'll see you guys there. We'll see you in cyberspace. Peace in the Middle East. If you're listening for the first time.

Hey, we got a lot of funny episodes for you. So check them all out starting with episode 11. All of them? All of them from scratch. All right, cool. See you next week. Later. That was a head gum podcast.