My Therapist Ghosted Me - MTGM EXTRA! "Am I being needy?"

Episode Date: July 3, 2024

This week... Sunglasses, regifting, neediness and ethical porn!If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to hello@MTGMpod.comPlease review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/lega...l/privacy-policy/For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.comFor more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.Thank you!

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a Global Player original podcast. Hello and welcome to the bonus episode of My Therapist Ghosted Me with me, Boag Williams and Joanne McNally. I'm coming to you live from Clapham Common. And I am coming live from Batter Z, as Joanne likes to call it. Did I tell you I'm on a shopping ban? No. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:00:32 So I do this every so often when I feel guilty. And I bought a couple of pairs of sunglasses. You know, the scuba ones that you loved. Sorry, can I just say, I didn't realize. I was sneaking around in my own DMs yesterday. And I got sent. There's a woman who, all she does is send me photos of you
Starting point is 00:00:50 wearing your sunglasses with loads of laughing emojis. I didn't realise me and her are obviously in cahoots about your sunglasses. I haven't actually replied to any of them. So I'm like, I'm not comfortable. I travel out to her face. I'm not comfortable doing it behind her back.
Starting point is 00:01:03 She doesn't bitch about me behind my back and that is very true. No, only to her face I'm not comfortable Doing it behind her back She doesn't bitch about me Behind my back And that is very true No only to your face But I do have a A weird like Love of scuba style Glasses Like it looks like
Starting point is 00:01:12 I could go scuba diving In them I just love Huge glasses And I bought two pairs Of like pretty Spenny sunglasses And now I've decided
Starting point is 00:01:21 I'm on a shopping ban For over a month Yes Well fair enough Yeah That's fair And I'm very happy With ban for over a month Yes Well fair enough yeah That's fair And I'm very happy with myself I nearly bought some yesterday and I said no You're on a shopping ban
Starting point is 00:01:31 I don't actually need anything I just needed the glasses But then I found a pair of Celine glasses In my house And I didn't know who owned them And I wore them out not knowing who owned them And you loved them too I loved them
Starting point is 00:01:44 When the band's over the glasses are coming home. The cat eyes. I just, you know my relationship with sunglasses. There's just no point. Did I tell you did I tell you I drunkenly gave these sunglasses to my mother? Did I tell you about that? You didn't take them back. I took them back. That is
Starting point is 00:02:00 that is so bad. That's who I am I am who I am I basically Drunkenly My mother
Starting point is 00:02:10 I lost these sunglasses In my mother's house She must have been so happy She was delighted She was wearing them Inside the house Outside the house To golf
Starting point is 00:02:18 I was like You're kind of You're kind of heckling me now Because Basically I got these They're Tom Ford I'm wearing them on the
Starting point is 00:02:24 Bowness just in case Vogue tries to make me Feel or something today And I'm not I'm not prepared And Tom Ford got them in TK Maxx Obviously for like
Starting point is 00:02:33 A fraction of the cast Did you You do well Yes No but you do You have an unusual Activity in TK Maxx Whenever you go in
Starting point is 00:02:40 You find gold Well when you go in Three times a day Every day Eventually something Will fall out of the rack Like I survey that place My mum goes in there
Starting point is 00:02:50 Like if we go to Soares This little area In Dublin They have a big TK Maxx out there You'd lose her to that place For three hours Yeah
Starting point is 00:02:57 So anyway mum had The glasses on And she was really Rubbing it in my face I felt And I was like Give us another go With them
Starting point is 00:03:04 And I had them on She goes Do you want them back love If you want them back And I was like, God, they, I said, give us another go then, I had them on. She goes, do you want them back, love, if you want them back? And I was like, no, not at all,
Starting point is 00:03:08 don't want them back. I just stopped, couldn't do that yet. By the fourth time she said it, I was like, go on, so, go on.
Starting point is 00:03:14 Go on, you don't actually want them. You don't even go inside. Even though you haven't even taken them off, you don't want them. You've cataracts, that's all the protection you need. The sun can't get past them anyway,
Starting point is 00:03:24 you don't need sunglasses I do that You should meet Tom Ford once I do that when I You shouldn't meet Tom Ford once now If I'm honest with you I'm glad you got them on sale Because we told you
Starting point is 00:03:34 That you were banned From expensive sunglasses I will never buy A pair of expensive sunglasses again As long as I live My heart is broken Now obviously I'm aware That there's a lot more
Starting point is 00:03:43 Important things going on In the world But my heart is broken At the amount'm aware That there's a lot more Important things going on In the world But my heart is broken At the amount of Expensive sunglasses I've lost I actually couldn't Think about it
Starting point is 00:03:51 It'd make me cry You and Spencer Are in the same box With that Like I have two pairs Of his sunglasses downstairs And I've worn them The odd time
Starting point is 00:03:57 And he's like They're mine And I'm like yeah Well I took them Because I liked them And I knew that you'd lose them So you don't deserve them They're now mine
Starting point is 00:04:03 Also can we just Can we actually just have A brief conversation about Who The fuck Do these designers think they are Charging 400 pounds for a pair of swimming gloves Like
Starting point is 00:04:12 Are you well in the head And who the fuck Are we paying for it What's It's like a mental illness in society I love a shade though You know I love a shade I'm like Pitbull
Starting point is 00:04:22 I wear them all the time At night time At day time I get there I really get the cost I wear them all the time, at night time, at day time. I get there. I really get the cost per wear of the shades, I feel. There's certain stuff you're like, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I just think someone's high.
Starting point is 00:04:33 Someone in Balenciaga's on drugs. Sorry, Balenciaga. Right, wait till I tell you this story. I met a man in a beach bar, actually, and he was wearing these amazing sunglasses and I was like, fab, I'm going to get them them Balenciaga are practically free Compared to these sunglasses What?
Starting point is 00:04:49 Two and a half grand For a pair I thought he must be Completely insane Insane Insanely loaded I would say If I spent two and a half grand On a pair of sunglasses
Starting point is 00:05:00 I'd have them surgically attached To my I'd literally go in To a plastic surgeon And be like I don't know what you need to do Just nail these Into the side of my head
Starting point is 00:05:08 Because Imagine That's like a fucking You could get a car For two and a half grand Two and a half grand For a pair of sunglasses I'd be like
Starting point is 00:05:14 Glue me into the car And glue the glasses Onto my face I should have just Followed him around And waited till he Put them down And done a little
Starting point is 00:05:20 Five finger discount For myself You sure Of course you should Have little Velcro hands Sonny Slurp I do that though When I do clothes Clear outs
Starting point is 00:05:28 And Amber might be Wearing something And I'm like Give me that back Why are you wearing that And she's like No You put that in a clear out
Starting point is 00:05:35 I forget that I put it In a clear out And then I'm raging When I see how good Someone looks in it And I want it back I have a woman Who comes to clean the house
Starting point is 00:05:42 Jennifer is her name She's absolutely sound She's Portuguese Have I told you about Jennifer? Poor Jennifer. Poor Jennifer. Do you remember? Do you remember?
Starting point is 00:05:50 She's Portuguese. She speaks no English, but she is the love of my life. She's changed my life completely. And it's like, do you remember in love actually when Colin Firth went to Portugal to write his book and him and his cleaner fell in love and they didn't speak the same language? That's me and Jennifer basically, right? But anyway So I give her
Starting point is 00:06:06 I give her bits and bobs I give her like Cosmetics and clothes And stuff And I did a big clear out Of clothes Like I have two bags Of clothes
Starting point is 00:06:12 The other day And she turned up Anyway yesterday Wearing a pair of runners That I put in the bag And I was like Fuck Now that I've seen them again
Starting point is 00:06:22 I know they actually Look really good Jennifer leaves barefoot I'm like I've actually I've changed my mind I know they actually look really good I'm like I've actually I've changed my mind Jennifer Sorry now I forgot about those little Nike beauties
Starting point is 00:06:29 Don't be giving I'm sorry don't be giving I'm first dibs on your bags That's the rules between us Joanne There's three bags Gone to second row For sale for Uni South Ireland
Starting point is 00:06:42 Oh I would like to say by the way you got any you got a letter i'm sorry i opened it i thought it was for me because i do stuff for unicef as well but i opened the letter and uh and they were that's what my mother says for your large says you gave a very large donation to unicef very large i was like oh that's very kind of joanne so i thought i'd announce it on the pod for you because i've lost the letter But well done they did thank you You did not lose the letter did you It's somewhere I just don't know where I fucking never do anything good
Starting point is 00:07:12 And the one time I do it and it's marked And you've lost the proof And it was a real decent amount of money as well I was like wow Sorry one last thing on gifts Have I ever told you About my auntie Naomi Yeah all the time Well Naomi is
Starting point is 00:07:28 So I love giving her gifts But she's so unappreciative Because no matter What you give her She will re-gift I'd given her An Aspinal bag For Christmas
Starting point is 00:07:39 Like an Aspinal bag That she would love God you're very generous She's one of my Favourite aunties And then I found out She'd only gone And given it to the raffle
Starting point is 00:07:48 Down at the golf club I said no Ah here Can I be one of your Favourite aunties Yeah I'd love an Aspinal bag You're very similar
Starting point is 00:07:58 To Gina now I have to say You and Gina Are cut from the same cloth We are cut from the same cloth Yeah It's kind of a Weird cloth isn't it There's cloth It's kind of a weird cloth isn't it
Starting point is 00:08:05 There's many people Uneven cloth Yeah Kind of a tie dye A dirty little rag Anyway Have we any emails or anything We certainly do have some emails
Starting point is 00:08:21 I will give you some options now Okay One I feel so needy Two Thoughts on porn Well, I I love, let's go with neediness We always talk about porn
Starting point is 00:08:37 I know, we might get both in because you know I love You know my thoughts on porn Yeah, but we all know your thoughts on porn You're like raising Awareness for porn But I can tell you now The porn industry Is absolutely fine And I
Starting point is 00:08:48 Excuse me By the way I would like to tell you I actually My porn My porn viewing Has gone down A little lot
Starting point is 00:08:55 I've just come to the window Completely naked He only Bye He only likes to run around Naked now Wouldn't you love that It'd be lovely
Starting point is 00:09:01 The freedom Particularly for you In this weather I did a couple of pods yesterday And I was like I will be in a sarong You can either Leave your camera
Starting point is 00:09:11 You can ask me To turn the camera off If you so wish But I will be topless And in a sarong Do with that what you will You need to just get a little fan When you're doing the pods
Starting point is 00:09:21 Jeez But you see It interrupts with the sound Anyway I like a bit I like a bit of neediness Okay As in I like
Starting point is 00:09:27 Yeah Hey Vogue and Joanne I'm having a real crisis Of confidence at the moment And I need you to give me a slap And tell me to get over myself I've recently had some big Fallings out in my family
Starting point is 00:09:38 And nobody is talking To each other Oh It's horrible because We're usually so close Anyway there's a whole other story that would be way too long and personal the point is that i've really needed the support of my boyfriend for context we've been together four years and living together for a year i'd normally spend at
Starting point is 00:09:55 least two or three days a week around my family but now he's my company seven days a week unless i'm with friends okay that's a lot that is a lot um basically i feel like he's not really stepping up and to be honest he's becoming more distant and the more i reach out for him if i get upset about the family stuff it's like he's comforting a stranger on a bus rather than his actual girlfriend of four years i asked him why he's not being more supportive and he said it's just a lot then after 10 minutes of silence he, do you want to have sex? Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:31 Is Spencer going out with you behind my back? Spencer? Spencer? Where have you been these last... What a twist to the tale. He has been rather busy this past week. Where have you been these last... What a twist to the tale. He has been rather busy this past week.
Starting point is 00:10:47 Why the fuck does he not just get that I need him to be nice and be on my side? Or am I just being a needy bitch? I think... I think needing someone's company seven days a week is a lot. And that's coming from even me. I'm not even that needy. Hoon DP. I went out with a guy
Starting point is 00:11:05 Once who Never ever required Any time alone Never Not a second Unless he was Unconscious He was happy to be around
Starting point is 00:11:14 Me or someone And I Found it difficult It's too much And also Do you know what I don't know what this I don't know what
Starting point is 00:11:21 I don't know what this woman Is going through It sounds like she's got Some very serious issues Going on And she needs more From this Partner of hers
Starting point is 00:11:29 But it doesn't sound like He has it to give I don't think I don't think I think with With anyone It can sometimes Become a little bit too much
Starting point is 00:11:38 Like I remember A friend of mine Broke up with somebody And for three months Solid Every conversation Just had to be about that everything was turned into that and like I remember when I got pregnant and I was like oh I'm pregnant it
Starting point is 00:11:51 was like oh well done back to this thing and I was just like oh my god after three months I was like listen you're gonna have to like remember that other people exist here not just you and the person you've broken up with we can't be doing this the whole time I know, there's a lot of funny memes On the internet In my news source Where they're talking about holding space For your friend who needs to go through With a fine tooth comb
Starting point is 00:12:16 At the break with their relationship Over and over and over and over And over again I've been guilty of it myself It's allowed for a certain period of time You give somebody a grace period That's allowed I remember one of my very good friends
Starting point is 00:12:31 She's a nurse When I was riddled with bulimia And I was telling everyone about it Because I was just starting treatment And I was delighted with my new Well my new role I guess As a mental patient And she pulled me aside And again I was maybe about three months in To me just enjoying my new Role I guess as a mental patient And she pulled me aside and
Starting point is 00:12:45 Again it was maybe like three months in to Me just enjoying my new status as a Bulimic an open bulimic Like publicly telling people about it and she went People are only sympathetic for so long And then you have to fucking power On you just have to move on to the next stage Which in my case was fucking
Starting point is 00:13:01 Getting better but look I don't mean To say I don't know how I don't know what this woman is going through I don't know how long it's been going on I mean I'd like to say this man needs to up his game But maybe it's a bit of both Maybe they need to meet in the middle Where she's like okay look maybe I am asking for too much Is it too much
Starting point is 00:13:18 Do you want me to pull back But then again shouldn't he just be there for her all the time I mean seven days a week is a lot And also men use sex as something like that they think they're being kind like last night i was like to spenny he was like do you want to watch something and it was half nine and i'm quite anxious at the moment so i was like no i have to go to bed i'm gonna read my book and like that's how i'm trying to get myself to just not be anxious and he was like oh darling if you want to not be anxious i could
Starting point is 00:13:41 come in and sort you out and i'm like that's not going to make me not anxious but he genuinely thinks that that will make me happy he's like I'll do you a solid I will penetrate you just to relax you if you so wish
Starting point is 00:13:52 darling I was talking to another friend of mine About We were talking about just Fucking life and men Life in general and men And all that jazz
Starting point is 00:14:09 And Sometimes how you react In situations Is actually I mean Why am I acting like I'm Freud It's maybe there's something else Going on
Starting point is 00:14:18 Maybe there's a deeper issue here Yeah I don't know I just think to Like I think it would be a lot For somebody to take on For seven days a week yeah I don't know I just think to like I think it would be a lot for somebody to take on
Starting point is 00:14:27 for seven days a week if you fall out with your family which I think is probably the worst thing ever like I'd hate that and I know that like if I have a fight
Starting point is 00:14:34 with Amber like I'll rant on about it for ages but it does come to a point where people are like okay we've heard it like we've heard it not everyone is
Starting point is 00:14:41 clearly as emotionally intelligent as some of us some people just can't handle intimacy, stress. What am I saying, Vogue? You're saying that maybe like give your boyfriend a little, you might be being a little bit needy and you have to like, I think you're going to have to reach out to your friends as well. Spread the load.
Starting point is 00:15:01 Spread the load. That's actually great advice if your boyfriend isn't up to this load spread it but you ever find out you know when you break up with somebody and you're literally like you were on how you don't drive yourself insane but you can't stop it's the same conversation over and over and you'll do it with as many people as humanly possible as many people as will listen you'll constantly talk about it and that's just the way people are do you remember that episode of sex in the city when sarah jessica parker um she'd broken up a big and she there was like a collage of her having the same conversation with
Starting point is 00:15:40 every single one of the girls and then in the end and she was like and he's the best thing that ever happened to him And he's got nothing now And blah blah blah And then they all just were like You need to go to a fucking therapist We cannot listen to this anymore Oh god
Starting point is 00:15:50 And that's a good friend To let you know about that Yeah I had a friend Who when I was going to One of my many breakups And could talk about Nothing else Except I was just like
Starting point is 00:16:01 Completely devastated by it One friend She's just like She's just like She's just like The calls She just stopped answering them And do you know When you're like
Starting point is 00:16:08 Fair enough Like fair Yeah You know Next I've literally Burned the ear off her Oh well
Starting point is 00:16:15 Yeah I'll ring that girl I was in primary school with I haven't seen her in six years But she's on Facebook At the moment So she's obviously awake I'm actually
Starting point is 00:16:22 I started It's been 15 years come here did you hear i broke up with sam oh you don't know sam okay let me tell i'll tell you through from the start i'll go it's don't worry it's not it's not gonna take up too much of your time don't worry i was i'm reading rachel's holiday at the moment to my in keys because um i started with her newest book and then everyone was like rachel's holiday is amazing and the same in that book there's this uh i don't give too much away but she keeps going on about the fella and she's telling all these people about the fella,
Starting point is 00:16:47 about what a narcissist he is and making up all these lies about him as well. And she's like, I know that's not true, but I don't care. Everyone's listening. Everyone's hanging on my every word. Like you can't, I suppose we're all kind of narcissistic in that way because we're like, oh yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:00 A hundred percent. You want to be validated. Like what I've learned in my old age, now that I'm in my forts A woman in my 40s Is that I'm nearly in my 40s Ah Vogue
Starting point is 00:17:10 As your older Wiser friend It's brilliant Let me just tell you It's a fucking Great stage of life Okay good I'm excited
Starting point is 00:17:19 It's a great stage of life But Oh yeah When I look back On relationships now where I'm like, and he did this, and he was like,
Starting point is 00:17:27 well, we all play a part ourselves. There's a certain amount of accountability that we, like, I still, we're completely going off topic, this poor woman. What have we told her? But it's, we said spread the load.
Starting point is 00:17:39 We did answer. We did say spread the load. But I think with, like, you become so obsessed by it And actually you forget that Like There's There's one side of the story
Starting point is 00:17:48 There's another side of the story And then there's the truth So like You're both bullshitters And like Someone knows Something of the truth But neither of you
Starting point is 00:17:56 Are really telling it Yeah You need This woman needs to find A new coffee shop Start kind of Infiltrating people down there Oh my god
Starting point is 00:18:04 In work Start telling people in work Your woes Spread the load Find a new coffee shop start kind of infiltrating people down there oh my god in work start telling people in work your woes spread the load find find new friends as well
Starting point is 00:18:11 yeah when you run out when you're throw out the net get sick of your shit get new ones join crossfit Barry's boot camp something like that
Starting point is 00:18:20 I was at Gigi's tea party for her new school because she's gone to big school in in September it's called reception over here it's called baby infants at home but I was
Starting point is 00:18:30 there and the principal of that part of the school was like say it because you meet all the parents and it's like what you don't understand is you are going to be together for the next nine years and I was like oh my god that's so true nine years so I'm going to get new friends we have a little minute we might as well do the last email go on Nine years. And I was like, oh my God, that's so true. Yeah. Nine years.
Starting point is 00:18:45 So I'm going to get new friends. We have a little minute. We might as well do the last email. Go on. Thoughts on porn. Girls, this needs to be said with love. We all know and love Vuj's obsession with her favorite website. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:18:58 They're actually talking about it. Oh my God. We're talking. Okay. Listen, I would just like to say like i'm only joking i'm not looking at porn all day every day jesus christ um i just wanted to flag some other female focused ethical and way hotter porn providers i'm scared about actually naming specific examples because people will come for you whatever you say these days but i'm telling you ladies do a bit of
Starting point is 00:19:21 googling i read that as got dogging for a second isn't that what is wrong with you i don't know are you taking testosterone yeah my balls have gotten tiny obviously paying for pornography means that the performers are more likely to get a better deal but it is possible to find less problematic porn sites than the big one that are also free. We all love a good paw, but imagine adding the satisfaction of knowing you're getting the big O and avoiding the exploitation of people in the porn industry.
Starting point is 00:19:55 Please keep me anonymous. Well, you haven't told us what we're meant to be Googling. Oh, I think she's... Amy Schumer had a great joke about female-focused porn. It was female porn Female focused porn and she goes oh so I guess it's just A headboard going in and out That's very funny
Starting point is 00:20:14 Okay so this woman is saying We need to get more ethical about our porn consumption Well we need to go to some other Sites or something there's obviously different sites That we should be using Yeah I think with porn I mean it's always going to be there to some other sites or something there's obviously different sites that we should be using yeah I think with porn like I mean
Starting point is 00:20:27 it's always going to be there and I understand what you're saying around porn but what I will say is I think that you need to be careful about it with kids
Starting point is 00:20:34 and growing up and what they think sex is when it's actually not what it is in porn yes make sure your kids
Starting point is 00:20:41 are watching ethical porn is that what you're saying folk it's a great lesson I think that's it for this week we've solved porn oh yeah okay well Make sure your kids are watching ethical porn. Is that what you're saying, Vogue? It's a great lesson. I think that's it for this week. We've solved porn. Oh yeah, okay. Well, on that note, yes, we have solved porn.
Starting point is 00:20:52 So thank you so much. FYI. That means for your information. For your information. Me and Vogue and me are going to America. I will be in America for the whole of October. I'll be in places like Denver and Portland and Austin. You're in Seattle?
Starting point is 00:21:15 I'm in Seattle. Do you know why I'm going to Seattle? Because it's green and like Ireland? No, it's because it's greater. Oh. Washington, D.C., Nashville, Tennessee, Tennessee Dallas and Austin Austin Austin Austin Austin Austin Texas
Starting point is 00:21:28 all tickets are available on drama.com and then in the middle of that I'm going to nip over and meet Vogue and we're going to do
Starting point is 00:21:34 New York Boston live therapist goes to me and then over to Toronto yes and that's on my therapist goes to me.com.

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