My Therapist Ghosted Me - MTGM EXTRA! "He's 50..."

Episode Date: May 8, 2024

This week, the EXTRA is being recorded just before Vogue & Joanne visited your friend and mine, Magic Mike. Plus, the verdict on Vogue's big pink jacket and LOTS of performative behaviour.  If y...ou’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to hello@MTGMpod.comPlease review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.comFor more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.Thank you!

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a Global Player Original Podcast. Welcome to the bonus episode of My Therapist Ghosted Me with me, Joanne McNally and Boag Williams. We were due to do a record yesterday, but I asked to reschedule and I'm not willing to give Joe the real reason, so I've just told him it's my period. Because then he can't say anything. It was my period, Joe. Okay, it was my period. It was periodic. It was my period all day.
Starting point is 00:00:35 All day. No, it was actually just, it just hit at four o'clock when we were due to record. You're lucky I gave you a heads up, to be honest. Yeah, she saw it. I was in so much pain, Joe, being a woman. You wouldn't understand don't give a shit about Jo did you hear about those
Starting point is 00:00:47 floods in Clapham yesterday that was Joanne that'll be that then yeah that's with sandbags down the end of the street it was all rolling downhill towards Vogue
Starting point is 00:00:56 okay yeah I need to tell you something about periods now that you've mentioned it and I don't know if you'll find this weird or not
Starting point is 00:01:04 Spenny put my period in his diary and I was unsure if I was bothered by it or appreciative because he knows that like during my period before I get a bit angry and actually yeah and now I'm like actually you know what maybe he's just trying to be kind to me around those times when I am more irritable or maybe he's trying to make sure he doesn't knock it up again. Maybe he's counting in the days. Maybe it's his way of saying, of course, I'll try again. But really, he doesn't want to. Maybe it's controlling you. My manager said that as well. She's like, are you trying for a baby? And I was like, no, why? And she was like, because Spencer's got your period in for a baby and i was like no why and she was like because
Starting point is 00:01:45 spencer's got your period in his diary and i was like no we are definitely not trying for a baby we're trying not for it we're trying not for a baby yeah trying not for baby from a straight male point of view just to add my 10 pence worth i think there's a bit of a movement these days for us to understand because there are apps these days where you can put your period in and then it will give your partner notifications to say that your partner's on their period just to allow for this and this might happen and just to be aware.
Starting point is 00:02:15 So actually, I think Spencer's probably right up with the curve on that one. He's a feminist, basically, is what you're saying. I mean, they've always said it about him they've always said Spencer Matthews that little feminist will you stop it
Starting point is 00:02:29 they had suspicions that he could be a feminist they say fantastic boyfriend and also a feminist feminist yeah avid feminist
Starting point is 00:02:38 lit with the feminism day in day out I heard he marches but in a disguise because he doesn't want to he doesn't want the credit for the feminism if you know what I mean
Starting point is 00:02:47 he's just discreet not like you Jo buying an app letting all the girls you know it's an app you're being a showy feminist
Starting point is 00:02:56 I am I've been a bit needy that feels to me Jo performative yeah and we don't appreciate it we don't
Starting point is 00:03:03 no one appreciates that no one quite knows what it means so Joanne and I are going on our second date in two nights and we're actually going to be going out very soon and I'm very concerned about the state of your face right now
Starting point is 00:03:18 you don't look ready I am going for a more natural look tonight and tonight look ready I am going for a more natural Luke tonight and tonight is it's magic mic day it's magic mic day
Starting point is 00:03:31 so if your feminism wasn't so performative you'd be coming with us but you're not because your misogyny leaks into your weekend plans
Starting point is 00:03:39 I've noticed that much yeah no I'll just be going to watch football with the boys and thinking beer and all of that and a titty bar
Starting point is 00:03:47 not right down with the lads just try and stop me nice pair of fresh tits in the face for the summer always the same but no
Starting point is 00:03:56 also you do understand Magic Mike is in the complete darkness so no one will it's fine to go like this and I will I will put something on
Starting point is 00:04:04 I'm going to be honest it doesn't look like you've even showered yet so what's happening here what time do I go to town because obviously this is my
Starting point is 00:04:13 riding a book uniform am I heading in I just woke up I had to take another nap because it's the creative process is incredibly draining
Starting point is 00:04:21 that is so funny that you were taking a nap because I was under the impression that you were coming here at one o'clock today to train with your trainer, but then you moved it to three o'clock and now it's five past four and there's still no sign of you.
Starting point is 00:04:36 Well, Olivia, if you're listening to this podcast, I do apologise for the double cancellation of one day. But when the creative flow comes, one must lean in. And I had a glass of wine at lunch, which always makes me a little nappy. But I did get a good solid 70-odd words. Things are moving fast.
Starting point is 00:05:01 Jesus Christ, are you going to be okay to go out tonight? You must be wrecked. I'm absolutely drained. I don't know how James Joyce did it. I really don't. He must have been wrecked. Okay, I have good news and I think it's always nice to start with a bit of good news
Starting point is 00:05:20 even though we have not started with the good news but however, here we are. Sorry, me still having a period is quite good news. I'm 41 next week. That is fucking epic news. Well done. Thank you. Wait, I forgot what I was doing.
Starting point is 00:05:36 Oh, I remembered now. Hang on. Your good news. I've good news. It's about Frank the cat. Remember I was telling you about Frank? Oh, your man. The Amazon cat.
Starting point is 00:05:46 No, this is the cat that I was telling you about Frank oh your man the Amazon cat no this is the cat that I wanted to to adopt because he was like he was 19 and his owner died and Frank who had been living a nice life
Starting point is 00:05:54 in this gorgeous house with his owner was then shipped off to a shelter because no one could look after him well I got a mail today it says Frank
Starting point is 00:06:02 hi Vogue you probably won't even see this, but I was listening to this week's episode of MTGM and you were talking about our cat, Frank, who we adopted at the end of March. His story broke our hearts and we went to see him and couldn't leave without him.
Starting point is 00:06:18 Even though we know at 19, he might not be around for so very long. He is the best boy, old man. He is now living his best life in Harold's Cross and hopefully we'll get a few more years out of him. Oh, that's so nice. It does feel performative because
Starting point is 00:06:34 if he hasn't got long to, you know, they can make themselves feel better. I'm learning about performativism, performative activism. Did you just read? She's just read an article with the word performative and she you just read sounds performative she just read an article with the word performative and she said
Starting point is 00:06:47 I'm going to use that now I'm going to try and make the most of that now sounds very performative what was that other word that you liked satiated
Starting point is 00:06:55 rambunctious no you liked satiated for a while satiated you liked satiated I just kind of threw it into a sentence
Starting point is 00:07:02 and you really latched on to satiated I do I bring that out when people think I'm stupid I say excuse me I just kind of threw it into a sentence and you really latched on to satiated. I do. I bring that out of, when people think I'm stupid, I say, excuse me,
Starting point is 00:07:09 I'm very satiated. Thank you very much. Excuse me? Yeah. How dare you suggest I'm not satiated? It feels like performative anger. But congratulations to Frank finding a new home. I know.
Starting point is 00:07:23 I thought that was really nice. I wish I'd been adopted into Harald's Cross it's closer to saying I love Harald's Cross I used to live there and I would like to follow up with some bad news oh
Starting point is 00:07:32 go on he's dead oh he's not he's not dead Jesus short lived well I was sent that mail a couple of hours ago
Starting point is 00:07:38 he could be gone at this stage he could be at the time of recording we believe Frank to be alive. Yeah. So, you know, I was out last night with Joanne. We went to this very fun event
Starting point is 00:07:51 in Sushi Samba and we had a lovely time and I thought, you know what? I've seen this girl wearing this pink leather jacket from the Frankie shop. Oh, Frankie.
Starting point is 00:08:01 Yes. The Frankie shop. And I was like, I'm going to treat myself to the jacket. I'm going to treat myself. And then I end up buying the jacket, but I bought it off the European website and it ended up costing me another 70 euro
Starting point is 00:08:11 in stupid custom fees. Whoever voted for Brexit, that's your fault and I want the money back. I bet Joe did. Joe is a Tory. Don't you dare. Joanne's a Tory and she loves Boris Johnson. It's so funny.
Starting point is 00:08:26 Like, obviously, before I lived here, I didn't understand obviously what a Tory is, but now I know it is a high insult. There's a bang a Tory off Spencer Matthews.
Starting point is 00:08:34 Now, I'm not going to say if he's a Tory or not a Tory, but I, because there is a bang a Tory off and because of his accent and stuff like that, then I'm thrown under the Tory bus too.
Starting point is 00:08:42 Listen, I'm, Switzerland. Okay. I don't think, I don't think he can be a Tory bus too. Listen, I'm, Switzerland. Okay. I don't think, I don't think he can be Tory and feminist. I don't think they're, do they go together?
Starting point is 00:08:50 Do they not kind of rub each other out? If there's any feminist Tories out there, do let us know. I don't think Spenny is, is anything politically, actually. I don't think he knows what's going on. Spenny is,
Starting point is 00:09:04 is, Spenny votes for Spenny Spenny oh my god is his own party yeah the other day right he was
Starting point is 00:09:11 and I actually thought it was amazing because I've heard it so little from anyone in the whole world and he was looking at himself in the mirror
Starting point is 00:09:18 and I was like are you delighted with your body and he goes do you know what I'm fucking delighted with my body he loves his body so much and because you know what I'm fucking delighted with my body he loves his body
Starting point is 00:09:25 so much and because you're always slagging yourself off I thought that's actually really nice to hear from someone you're the only person in the world to say that
Starting point is 00:09:32 and I appreciate it I think hating your body feels like it's more a female hobby Joe how do you feel about your body
Starting point is 00:09:40 I know plenty of blokes who hate their bodies too sorry I'm not sure if that's a bit performative, but no, they... It sounds performative to be honest, Jo.
Starting point is 00:09:48 Do they actually hate their bodies or are they just saying they hate their bodies to bang women? To make them... To grab that pussy. No, I don't think so.
Starting point is 00:09:59 I think there are men who are ungrateful as well, yeah. You're right, you're right. Yeah, for balance. Yeah, you're right. They do. I'm glad they do. I'm fucking glad they do
Starting point is 00:10:09 because we've had to do it for long enough on our own. Only fair. Back to my bad news, please. Sorry. Sorry. So anyway, I waited ages for the jacket. No, thanks to the Tories.
Starting point is 00:10:20 And the jacket arrived. I got into the taxi last night and I actually was going to text Joanne and I was like no don't be jealous of my jacket Joanne don't be jealous
Starting point is 00:10:29 and I got in and she was like it's nice but I wouldn't buy it myself I think I think what I said that's what you said this is again
Starting point is 00:10:40 performative anger from Vogue I think what I actually said was it's a lovely jacket. Wouldn't have spent that much on it though. Quote unquote. Okay. Well,
Starting point is 00:10:50 so we went to the event and we got a couple. I think that's what I said because it was pretty spicy. But it's stunning. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:59 Well, we went to the event. We got a couple of pictures taken. Obviously, they went in the Daily Mail and I couldn't help myself with the comments. I'm not in. I'm not. Did they went in the Daily Mail and I couldn't help myself with the comments. I'm not in.
Starting point is 00:11:07 I'm not. They didn't do the podcast. I had a part to take with Laura Whitmore. I'm not in it. You are. You are. You are. Don't look at it now, please.
Starting point is 00:11:12 It'll ruin the episode. Okay. And so here is one of the comments. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. You don't have a lot of faith in my outfit or how I look.
Starting point is 00:11:21 No. I'm absolutely sure. Don't look at it now fit or how I look. No, I'm sure you look absolutely smashing. I'm absolutely sure. Don't look at it now because you'll never go out again. You'll start crying. Don't let her see it now. It'll ruin the weekend for her. Thanks Jo. Obviously I'm
Starting point is 00:11:37 slyly googling. Go on Jo, tell the story. And I looked at the comments and it said that pink jacket on Vogue looks awful. Someone else commented, it really does. Fashion fail. Sorry, Vogue. Not nice at all.
Starting point is 00:11:52 And then under that, a comment, oh, gosh, that jacket makes her look old. And the haircut doesn't help. Old? Old? No, I would have said it makes you look cheap, not old. That's what I would have said, makes you look cheap not old that's what I would have said too yeah horrified
Starting point is 00:12:07 I should have said I didn't mean to say old I must have been drunk I'll go back edit my comments you know you know that they've actually in the Daily Mail
Starting point is 00:12:18 now you have to is it the Daily Mail they've changed it so you can't write anonymous comments anymore like you have to name you have to name yourself yeah but you can call yourself Fanny McGee if you want you know what I mean you don't write anonymous comments anymore like you have to name you have to name yourself yeah but you can
Starting point is 00:12:25 call yourself Fanny McGee if you want you know what I mean you don't have to use your actual name oh okay so I would
Starting point is 00:12:33 it's a great name if I have a girl if I have a little girl Pat McGee your little girl's called Pat McGee that's going top of the list
Starting point is 00:12:46 hello Joanne Vogue and Jo I'm in desperate need of some of your expert advice I'm 23 and for the last two months I've been seeing a 50 year old.
Starting point is 00:13:08 Wow. At first I thought it would just be a fling so I didn't put too much thought into it but things have progressed and I don't see it cooling off anytime soon. For context, we worked together and met in a job, but everything was PG until he got moved
Starting point is 00:13:27 elsewhere. He's whisking me away on fab trips every other weekend, which I have no complaints about, but my constant disappearances have led to my parents to question who I'm with. I've told them bits about him, but gave a fake name because my dad is the king of online stalking. And
Starting point is 00:13:43 said that he was 27, not 27 years older. I'm very close with my parents and usually I give them too much information about my love life. However, the one thing my dad told me not to do was to bring a man home that's older than him.
Starting point is 00:14:04 I hate lying to them. And they're asking so many questions. It's making it harder. Please give a girl some much needed advice. On how she should handle this situation. I don't want to be the reason. My dad doesn't make 50. Hold on.
Starting point is 00:14:20 Her dad's not even 50. Her dad's younger than her fella. I. Oh. Her dad's not even 50. Her dad's younger than our fella. I have many mixed feelings about this. Okay, so one of my friends is, he's 40 now, but he was, about three years ago, he was going out with this girl who was 22. And he was like 40 and she was 22 and I was like he sent me a picture of them and I go haha who's that your sister like and I was kind of like half serious because she
Starting point is 00:14:52 looked like so young compared to him and he took real offense to it now it didn't work out in the end but I feel that there is such a huge generational gap there that like you're only out of school five years. There's such a break in like the conversations you would be having or the things that you would be finding interesting at those two separate ages so far apart. Like I'd find it hard to be friends with a 23 year old and I'm 38
Starting point is 00:15:19 because I just think that they feel so much younger than me. I know what you're saying, but my take on this would be they obviously than me. I know what you're saying, but my take on this would be they obviously are, like, I know what you're saying, but they obviously are having good conversations.
Starting point is 00:15:32 They obviously are getting on and they wouldn't be together. So that's not the concern. The concern is that things are rolling and it's getting a bit more serious and she's obviously mad about him. And he's obviously mad about her. Of course he is.
Starting point is 00:15:44 Yeah. Do you know what though though people have brought home worse yeah look do I marry exactly if Sandra Neal can survive that is a joke
Starting point is 00:15:57 it's a joke it's a good one it's very much a joke it was a very funny joke and I won't be taking time for that no but it's but it's true people bring home What a joke. It was a very funny joke and I won't be taking it. No.
Starting point is 00:16:08 But it's true. People bring home what their parents consider to be ill-fitting partners all the time. Yes. Your parents are not going to be
Starting point is 00:16:16 thrilled about it. Your dad's going to kill them. Yeah, it's going to be really awkward. Maybe they just don't need to meet them. Maybe just keep it on the down low.
Starting point is 00:16:25 I don't. You know what I mean? I lied to my parents all the time about stuff growing up because I knew it would get me in trouble if I didn't. I know, but I think she's very close to them. So what I would say is I wouldn't expect to be bringing him home. I don't think that that's a good idea. But it doesn't mean you can't tell them.
Starting point is 00:16:43 If you feel like you have to tell them do but I don't know if I'd be bringing them home they'll go mad it also doesn't matter if you fall out with your daddy because you have a new one now you don't need to
Starting point is 00:16:54 you say dad I have yeah you've been more mature dad you've been replaced mate I'm having a sleepover with dad oh god yeah it's awkward but you know what I would say
Starting point is 00:17:07 and this is I'm gonna say it just be careful because he he's so much older than you that
Starting point is 00:17:16 it's probably doable now but you know but he's gonna die soon I didn't want to say it you've got your whole life ahead of you he doesn't
Starting point is 00:17:29 he doesn't send him to me I'll fucking take him I'm only 10 years behind him yeah come on that's not fair we wish you well we wish you well
Starting point is 00:17:42 love is love love is love your body your choice yeah We wish you well. We wish you well. Love is love. Love is love. Your body, your choice. Yeah. Is that okay? Till death do you part. What I really want to say is,
Starting point is 00:17:55 oh my God, he must be well hung because men of his age sometimes struggle. Spout you on. I don't think that that's true. I think that like, like, what's his name? Bernie E I think that like Bernie Eccleston had a kid not long ago he's like 900,000 years old
Starting point is 00:18:11 he's obviously still able to perform I'd say no that was like you say a bit performative actually I'd say it lacked performance is what I would say it's the opposite of performative I'd say things were put in a jar
Starting point is 00:18:27 and then taken inside themselves. Well, you know, allegedly. Allegedly. I wouldn't say now he was getting stuck in on top, you know. Jesus Christ. I wouldn't say so. Would you? He probably just sat in his commode
Starting point is 00:18:42 and she positioned herself and then they worked out the exchange there on a pulley system. The pulley system always makes me laugh. But I only say that because I did have experience
Starting point is 00:18:58 of being with an older gentleman at one stage. It was a very brief dalliance. But I'm trying to kind of make me sound a bit more high end.
Starting point is 00:19:20 I shouldn't suggest that all older men struggle in that department. That was ageist of me and I apologise. I'm just saying from my personal experience, there were some issues around that which I put down to age. I'd say the oldest I'd go at 38 is probably 60. See, it just depends on the person, doesn't it? Like you just, you think you have all these rules
Starting point is 00:19:45 like I'm sure that girl who emailed in did not expect to be going out with a lot 27 years older than her but she's met someone that she likes and it's not easy
Starting point is 00:19:52 to meet people that you like if you meet someone that you like give it a go yeah I mean you know if it's legal
Starting point is 00:19:59 and it is in this case good caveat I just think it's so like and it's so fun at the start as well and all the trips away and enjoy it.
Starting point is 00:20:11 Enjoy it. Enjoy it. I've actually turned the corner on this. Actually no I agreed with it in the first place. I've stayed in the
Starting point is 00:20:17 corner I was at at the start. Well done that's what we like to hear. Ding ding ding. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah I think good for
Starting point is 00:20:23 her. Good for him. Well that is probably the end of our bonus episode today I've had a fantastic time with both of you Joanne you're going to have to
Starting point is 00:20:31 get the old skates on aren't you aren't you better skataddle we're meeting Mike it's Magic Mike day oh I can't wait to tell you
Starting point is 00:20:40 about Magic Mike I can't wait I assume Mike's going to be dining with us before after during like this is a and we're meeting the cast fantastic to tell you is about Magic Mike. I can't wait. I assume Mike's going to be dining with us before, after, during. Like this is a... And we're meeting the cast.
Starting point is 00:20:48 Fantastic. We're meeting all the Mikes. It's going to be us and 20 Mikes. Jesus Christ. I know. Better put on a good bra. Don't wear the ghosted bra. Whatever you do,
Starting point is 00:20:59 don't wear the ghosted bra. Now that one, the curls up at the ends. That has to go. Now that I'm single after they're gone I have to do a whole refresh on everything
Starting point is 00:21:07 oh thank god it's all just it's just suspenders for me they were even turning me off you're just sitting here
Starting point is 00:21:15 in my suspenders I have loads of gorgeous bits that I've no intention of ever wearing I'll pass them on you're away I'm married now
Starting point is 00:21:21 it doesn't matter to me give me your grey knickers I'll give you my good knickers thank you I want your wedding garter okay fabulous give me everything
Starting point is 00:21:29 of course two sets for you it's what just so if anyone anyone is listening the grey knickers are gone now just for the record she's sexy
Starting point is 00:21:39 and she knows it okay by the way before we go we can talk about it again I was gifted a book by a photographer it's not the photographer didn't gift it to me my friend gifted it to me Rankin is the photographer
Starting point is 00:21:50 and he photographed Heidi Klum naked in this amazing huge book and when I her body is insane I am gonna show off for a second actually
Starting point is 00:22:05 hang on oh my god like her boobs I mean she is have you seen her daughter look Rankin photographed me
Starting point is 00:22:15 when I was pregnant I know oh my god and it was on a billboard Vogue that's amazing why have you not framed that I just can't I forgot about it until you said it there.
Starting point is 00:22:27 You need to get that framed. I definitely need to get it. And he's really sound as well. Anyway, she looks absolutely insane. Don't look at her daughter in any pictures. You'll feel really bad about yourself. We're subpar humans compared to that child. Another little blow from my self esteem
Starting point is 00:22:45 don't look at the Daily Mail, don't look at Heidi Klum's daughter, just don't do it Bye.

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