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from kyle pkn 459 how are you boys doing good wonderful yeah you're doing wonderful is there
something interesting in your in your novel right now you're maybe not a novel maybe it will be
someday are you looking at your notebook i am looking at my notebook yeah is there anything
intriguing notes here yeah yeah i've got some notes here what do you want to hear about you
want to hear about the most interesting baseball team in the world uh the bow of odysseus six days in fallujah uh a youtube channel that i like called blue watch
uh red man's episode of cribs or i want you to sell me on that fallujah game because i watched
a clip of it do you actually think you can see yourself jumping into that yeah so it's single
player and it's co-op uh you you it's meant it's a game that's been in development since I think,
man,
it's a long time,
maybe 14 years now.
Uh,
initially Fallujah was big at the time it was.
And that was the problem.
It was initially shelved because of people saying it was insensitive because
it's like,
Hey dude,
I lost my arm in Fallujah.
I'm 27.
Like this just happened,
dude.
You know?
And so a little time passed and, uh, some people picked the project back 27. This just happened, dude. A little time passed
and some people picked the project
back up.
It's going to be for early access
in about a week or two.
I think the 22nd, perhaps, of
this month.
Looks real fun. It's a hardcore first-person
shooter against AI and it's meant to
very much duplicate what
the battles in Fallujah were like. The way the AI, and it's meant to very much duplicate what the battles in Fallujah were like.
The way the AI works,
and the way the engagements
work, the way lighting works. You step into
a dark room, and your eyes don't adjust right away.
They might be waiting for you,
but the thing that's new,
their kicker is that
every time you play, it's different. It's a completely
new, procedurally generated
city of Fallujah.
And you have the same objectives.
You're going in to take out some mortars on a roof,
maybe take out a high value target, shit like that.
But, and it in no way looks like this.
I mean, a little bit, but like, you know.
Better than this.
This looks pretty slick.
No, it doesn't look this good.
I'm kidding.
It's about like this or something. That kind of doesn't look that good to me. Yeah, it doesn't look this good. I'm kidding. It's about like this or something.
That doesn't look that good to me.
It doesn't to me either. This looks a little better,
but it's still not great.
That's a pull door, buddy.
Is it a...
He's pulling with his foot. That's what you don't understand.
He's got magnetic boots on.
Don't you know anything about magnetic boots?
You're not in the army. You don't know.
All the weapons are very much like what would have been used there.
So you can see they've got the M16.
They've got the crimson chin there.
See how they've got the non-folding stocks?
Apparently that was a big problem.
They had to use those to clear rooms, right?
You've got this big, long, 20-inch barrel, non-collapsible stock AR platform.
So that was an issue.
But I don't know.
It looks fun.
I don't think it's going to be something
that we're going to grind forever and ever,
but it just stuck out to me as a cool shooter
right on the horizon.
Some games you can just enjoy for a little while,
and that's what they are.
40.
40, okay.
That tells me a little something.
They don't think of themselves as a triple a
game they're not calling themselves tarkov or whatever they're admitting to early access which
i like okay yeah yeah yeah maybe they'll be cool yeah what what i look if you're early access just
say it just come out and say it look it's like being gay it's cool but but don't come in here
giving blood if you know and not telling us we need to know no that's true i need to know it's crazy to be there it's still illegal to give well illegal
but like they still don't want blood from gay people they fix that that's a recent thing maybe
this year or last year like they're taking gay blood now yeah like i'm like 99 sure i read
something about that or okay somewhere yeah don't't they test for diseases for everyone anyway?
Yeah.
They better be testing all the blood.
My blood bounced like a bad
check.
Can you imagine if they came
out and they're like, well, I mean, the big deal the whole time
with the gay blood is that we refused
to check it and we decided, fine,
we're just going to let you in. It's like, whoa,
no one's been checking the blood?
It's like no it's fine. You know we got the types.
Put it in the bucket. A, B, O
Blood tests are just free HIV
tests.
Well all STDs. Actually blood donations
I fucked up the joke.
It's not even free. You get a cookie and they tell you.
It helps soften the news.
I was cutting
so hard I refused the cookie.
You're the last person to be fucking refusing a cookie or orange juice,
passing out in the middle of the fucking thing.
Literally, I actually went unconscious,
like cold towels on my head and shit,
like all pale as a ghost.
And then I'm like, I can't eat that cookie.
Dude, you would have burned a net more calories
by the movement the cookie would have allowed you to do to like leave like you know how stoked i was
this was like february two years ago you know stoked i was to lose the weight of a pint of blood
because i knew i wouldn't have to run the next week i wasn't going to mention to derrick that
i gave blood this week but i was gonna be like yeah. So a pint of blood is what's a pint?
An eighth of a gallon.
Two pints is a quart, right?
So it's an eighth of a gallon.
So it's a pound.
It's a pound you lose.
Actually more because a gallon of blood would certainly weigh a lot more than a gallon of water because the iron content and everything else.
And how many calories does it take your body to replenish a pint of blood?
Probably a significant amount, right?
It wouldn't be small beans, I wouldn't think. Maybe
a few hundred, 300 calories. Just making
up numbers. It's too difficult.
I don't know how you regenerate
blood as a human or how long it takes.
Something to do with bone marrow.
A gallon of blood is 8.3 pounds.
I agree that it would be more,
but I would have thought it would be more than that.
It's like a pound, though. You were pretty close. A little over a pound
for an eighth of it.
Is that how much they take from you when you give blood?
A pint?
I assume that. That's what I always hear.
I figure those bags they have are a pint.
And that thing was just brimming.
When you think about a pint as far as
a pint of
beer at a restaurant, that makes it seem like a much larger amount of blood. It's a pint of beer at like a restaurant.
That makes it seem like a much larger amount of blood.
Like one of those big glasses just to the brim of blood.
They do everything they can with the big bottom and the narrow,
like the thick bottom under the glass, I mean to say.
The narrow bottom and everything.
It's really just a solo cup, but it seems like so much more.
Oh, yeah. It's like those. Salt water? 8.5 pounds. More than blood. bottom and everything like it it's really just a solo cup but it seems like so much more oh yeah
it's it's like um those all water 8.5 pounds more than blood that's so weird that is odd i wouldn't
guess that but it like you know that makes sense as far as the salt content i would have guessed
that seawater is is on average more um salty than blood because i know that people have survived on
blood at sea.
I know you can't do that with seawater.
They've lived on turtle blood, bird blood.
You wouldn't want to replace your blood with seawater.
Do you know why you can't drink seawater at sea?
Salt.
Do you know why it's worse than no water?
Because it takes more to process the salt through your kidneys
than the water you get out of it, right?
You do.
Except I don't know the difference between kidneys and liver and shit, but you're
probably right.
Livers are like poisons.
Kidney, I think, is like...
These seem like duplicate organs.
They're both in the mix.
I think they're working in tandem. It's like the bodyguard
and a tough bartender.
He'll step in if he needs to,
but normally he just handles like liquids.
Yeah.
Now I understand science,
I guess.
But,
but,
but yeah,
so like if you,
if you were to drink like ramen soup or something,
it takes a lot of fresh water for your body to process all that salt water you
just took in.
So if you just drink salt water,
you're less hydrated because you need more fresh water to process all the salt you just took in.
Some people get that wrong in regard to diet sodas.
Because I remember I was told, like, if you just drink nothing but diet sodas, you're super dehydrated because of the sodium in there.
And it's like, I bought that for years until I was like, OK, wait, the sodium in one can.
Totally negligible.
40 milligrams.
Get the fuck out.
It's nothing.
It's I was convinced for the longest time that like, oh, it's making you retain water like because of the salt.
No, it's like it's no amount of shit, by the way.
This is zero sugar is like they change the formula.
It's very good.
You know what?
I get stuck on like people will tell you if you drink.
I think it's very good you know what i get stuck on like people will tell you if you drink i think
it's aspartame but aspartame is terrible for you in so many different ways that it that actually
makes you heavy because it increases your appetite and all this and i'm just like man i don't know
like i'm kind of a stevia guy but i'm just sort of putting it down as mostly bullshit heck half
of the vitamins and supplements you take are bullshit right like i i think they're like you need more fucking cobalt really really i've never noticed
a cobalt deficiency and when i take in more cobalt from your fucking expensive pill i see no difference
in my life none um i i used to they didn't take it long enough it It takes years of cobalt supplementation to get back to normal.
When your fingernails start turning blue, that's when you're there.
Yeah, yeah.
I've cut down the pills I take by a ton.
I used to take like a little of this, a little of that, whatever.
And I get them for free.
And I'm still like, yeah.
If I had to pick like two or three, definitely want my turmeric my anti-inflammatories and i
definitely want um the fish oil like i think those two in particular like if you just do those two
and those those are fairly cheap fish oil a lot of people agree with fish oil yeah um protein and
creatine both work those are actually things that people you know that are important if you're
weightlifting.
Half of this shit doesn't do anything.
I agree. The supplement industry,
that's what Derek sort of...
I always thought Derek should have
done more working out.
He's so impressive to look at.
If he had his shirt off more working out while
telling you things, I'd believe it even more.
Just have him do overhead presses
with dumbbells while he explains.
Why doesn't he have a second channel where he...
Look, I remember when he sent me
my workout program for the first time
and accompanying it
were YouTube links to people
performing some of the exercises that
the average person's never heard of before.
And moreover,
people performing them the correct
way as far as derrick is concerned but i was thinking like damn derrick why don't you have
a whole playlist of these why don't you have a playlist of you doing every exercise that you
think is a good exercise i'm like and then like while you're you can make these you can make
youtube shorts or you can make three minute videos out of every exercise you could talk about why you
should be doing like this and i don't know i guess this is not as bad you do it because i told you you know what that's good enough for me about making content versus
watching it i've um i've never made weight lifting content but i have lifted on the pka hangouts
before and between my ears everyone is judging the weight right the weight everyone wants to
see me lift a lot it's very important that i you know like put a lot on this bench press or a lot on even like bullshit people don't know like tricep push
downs the guy can't be no fucking pansy with 70 pounds on this i gotta do 85 or whatever
but nobody actually cares no one cares at all what they measure is form that's what they want
to look at they are tearing apart your form in every little way and i don't care about that
doesn't care you got a failure i just want to see like that's the thing to me i want to see you go to
failure like if you're over there just like yeah clinkety clinkety clack not you in particular but
like clinkety clinkety clack and you never get to those and then if i don't see you reach down
take five off and finish that last one like i see that and i'm like oh he's going places if that's his
thing like like when he fails he makes it extra hard for himself the one the one thing i've always
wanted is in a training partner um has been someone who can come there and just put fingers
and like like give me a little help those ounces of help and like and a person can can give it and
take it away like like as you go through it to to really make it as hard on you as is possible.
Make you do the work.
Make you go through the motions.
But you can't duplicate that just by taking weight off because you've got to reset and everything.
One thing I've improved in as I have lifted for more years is I can fail with good form.
Right?
So overhead press is a really good one.
Dude, the temptation is to lean back
and turn it into a half a bench press
as you're losing strength.
Nay, nay, nay.
You need to, if you don't complete that rep
or barely complete that rep,
it still needs to be in perfect form.
If you cheat on it, well, I don't know.
My experience is bad form is injury.
I like to lean back bad form because then my lower back knows you're in the danger zone, buddy.
It's move or lose time.
I like to put parts of my body in high risk performance encouragement.
I've been my neck straight back so that if I do fail, I die.
Yeah.
No, I open. No saving.
I open my mouth wide
so I'm going to catch it in my teeth.
I'm ready.
There are exercises where
especially the
inclined bench press with dumbbells.
If I fuck that up and drop it
on my face,
that's a problem.
It might kill you. it might fracture your skull
and kill you mine are sharp might have sharp edges like like not like sharp enough to cut paper but
like sharper than any of yours like because it's got it's got those tiny micro plates that are part
of the thing dude drop the smoothest kettlebell on your head from three from four inches and see
what happens you're gonna be in the hospital.
Dude, you ever see people jump, like doing flips and stuff into a pool
and they come so close to hitting the concrete on the side?
I saw a guy eat it, a video.
I saw a guy slam his face into it, and I knew it was bad,
but then I saw the aftermath.
One frame of the aftermath had me.
I screamed, and I did this with my phone.
Ah!
I looked away from the phone and flung the screen away from myself.
Because from here down was gone.
From his eyes down in his face was gone.
If you could take a sawzall and start under his eyes and go in until you get to ear.
And then go down until you get to jaw and then just pull all that out.
That's what he did.
Doing like this crazy backflip slam in his face.
Was he dead?
No,
no.
So he was just,
he was going,
don't send me that.
I already did.
I'm glad I didn't yeah one time i saw a guy in a motorcycle
accident and he was just sort of snoring and that was rough it was i bet he died yeah probably i've
been watching a lot of police videos today i found some new channels uh i don't know exactly what
what they're called but but the the sort of genre of video I'm into right now
is sassy woman who talks shit until she goes to jail.
It's always a situation where...
No cars involved this time?
Oh, they start in their car, but they get them out of there.
They get the fuck out of that car.
So they're talking shit to a cop.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
It's great.
And it's white chicks and black chicks um i like i
like both like like the karens and chaniquas i don't care i discriminate yeah um this uh the
black chick is in her hotel room she has overstayed her stay they want her out holiday in and it's in
atlanta and uh she's like i'm naked i just took a shower let me get dressed and he's like cool and you see it's almost like paranormal activity how they fast forward and everything gets
all wiggly for a second give her like five ten minutes to get dressed boom boom boom come on
let's go it doesn't take this long she's like i'm getting ready i'm doing everything she's like
doing her makeup and her hair and shit in there he's like like, wait, I got time for this shit. She's like, I don't have pants on. He's like, well, put them on.
He's like, it don't take five minutes
to put a pair of pants on. This time
he gets the door open and she's
in there just being awful. Just being a
scumbag. Does she have pants
on? Yeah, she's
got the pants on. She's packing her bag slow
as fuck. She's on the phone with her
boyfriend. She's like, Officer Carver's watching me. her boyfriend she's like officer carver's watching me he's being weird officer carver's weird he's staring at me
this atlanta's ratchet atlanta's ghetto atlanta's ghetto and i'm like man you're a holiday inn
all right and you're being asked to leave oh it's pretty nice like you're overstaying your
this isn't the omni or some shit we're like like come on this is a 75 hotel room and they're kicking you out and and she just kept going and kept going
finally and they're just appeasing appeasing like like keep it keep keep it together just come on
please fucking leave finally so they're walking down the hallway we've got the bags packed she's
got her clothes on she's accused him racism, complained about their COVID mask and
everything else, and she starts cursing
a little. Y'all fucking assholes. Y'all
fucking assholes. She's like, do not curse,
ma'am. She's like, why the fuck not?
There's other people here in the hotel room. You're disturbing
them. Fuck you. All right, that's it.
Grab her. And they've got her now
up against the wall, hands behind
your back, and now she's crying.
Now she's lost all
the attitude it's all gone i'm so sorry mr officer please sir mr man this that and the other no oh
what's this marijuana charges just racking up at the end 60 days in prison oh i love it she had
drugs and wouldn't and wouldn't leave to the point the cops were called and then still
what an idiot.
Just one after the other shit like that.
My favorite, outside a bar, real
bitchy cunty chicks who weren't even close
to hot enough. I would annoy me. You enjoy that?
Oh, I love watching it. They get them in the end.
They always get them.
And I don't mean that. They get them good. They'll
tase them and beat them up. This one chick,
she was talking so tough.
She was just, fuck you, punk.
Pussy, pussy ass cop. Pussy
ass cop. This and that. And like, he's
like, alright, hands behind your back. And she did like a jerk
like this. And he goes, pow!
Popped her right in the mouth. Punched her in the mouth.
And she just melts.
You didn't have
to punch me!
And that's it. Her hands behind the back and all she says from then going forward, he didn't have to punch me. I's it we're hands behind the back and all she says from then
going forward he didn't have to punch me like yeah he did it worked out so well i feel like
everyone in your life needs to know this is this is how we solve he said stop stop moving around
and she started break dancing and he popped her in the nose yeah in the mouth punched her right
in the fucking mouth she's bleeding it's great I must have watched like eight women get in the business today.
Yeah, just one after another, putting them in their place.
It was Pussy Pass Denied.
I don't know if that subreddit's even still around.
It's a little more mellow.
It was basically women trying to use their Pussy Pass,
trying to use their female privilege to get away with stuff that a guy never would.
And oftentimes they were starting physical fights
and the guys in my opinion were almost always the good guys it's like they absorbed a lot of abuse
maybe even a couple strikes before they were like all right revoked no more pussy pass for you you
want to you want to throw hands like a man you're gonna catch left like a hand and and boom knock it
yeah i saw
one where there's like three ugly bitches three ugly bitches they've started some kind of argument
at a bar and they won't shut the fuck up and the cops keeps he keeps saying leave fucking we're on
the sidewalk outside leave which means turn around walk away don't stop until i can't see you anymore
by the way okay because they didn't know it means go away yeah after three leaves this one like the prettiest
of them who's like a five at best peeks around she's like the only problem was those bitches are
jealous of me like like does like this this it's just disgusting to watch her do it
i did it pretty well drunk like yeah she's like looking at him and then like she steps away
and and like says something like,
I don't even want to hear anything. What are you, fucking
five foot nine? To the cop.
He goes, alright!
Now you can't leave.
And he's like,
wait, what?
Wait, what?
She's like, you're being criminally
trespassed now. You can't do that
without... She just crossed a short king that without you just crossed a short king
she crossed a short king and he made up some bullshit through her in the fucking car and she's
like how am i gonna get my car i guess they'll impound it if it's parked improper just being
such a love it who knows what'll happen to your car who knows what'll happen to you what's the name of that channel in case i want to pop out i've got it my history i'll look it up
in a second but yeah i just just just watch it and it was like dudes getting the business too
like this one guy was just i don't know how many times they tased him but it wasn't enough for my
taste three or some people appear to be largely immune to tasers based on the amount
of meth or it seems to be meth that they don't they malfunction a ton so they malfunction a ton
oh that's what you think it is i know it is i know it is because you can't resist a taser if
it's deployed properly especially if you i'm sorry but i'm curious like you can't resist it i believe you what if i'm wearing a leather
jacket what if i'm wearing a puffy jacket and you've got armor on now my taser doesn't work
okay yeah that's that's part of the reasons why it doesn't work it's pretty terrible so
often think about it like any a couple layers will stop it um leather certainly will canvas
like like like good military shit will probably stop it a little bit.
Multiple layers for sure. Anything winter...
Oh, Carhartt jacket. It's not going through that, I don't think.
Moreover,
the closer you are,
you've got two prongs that are coming out
and the further they travel, the further they
travel away from one another.
At about
15 or 20 feet or something like that one prong will hit
them kind of top center of the the back and the other one hit them in a thigh or the ass but
beyond that it's hard to even make it work right because one of them's going to hit them and the
other is going to sail off somewhere and you need oh i was thinking though i'm sorry i don't know
i know less about tases than you but i'm like if you were to get me say two in the forearm that seems like a three out of ten incapacitation but if you were to get like my thigh and my
shoulder now i have a whole body problem right 100 if you tase someone meaning shooting those
barbs into them that are connected with the wires back to the device and but the barbs go in
right next to each other it's essentially a stun gun again the whole point is getting that big travel for the electricity to go to be arcing
from your shoulder to your quads and everything in between every one of those muscles is hyper
stimulated rapidly i don't know a thousand times a minute ten thousand times a minute whatever the
fuck the frequency is you can't fight through that you're just it turns you up it doesn't turn
you off it turns you on yeah everything just goes seize mode then i guess it's just that they're awful weapons that
fail 50 of the time in winter like 80 of the time in winter right 100 of the time
not videos they work 90 of the time in videos uh-uh i feel like they like you see them all the
time yeah yeah i've been watching these videos today like man it's so rare that they work and like drop the guy like you want it to
like i've only seen that that's probably i would say 20 of the time they work as they're supposed
to they're way worse than guns especially if you've got someone off of tasers if you have a
guy standing still or a guy um then it's a lot easier a guy shirtless it's even easier but if
you've got some guy who's running away from you down the street,
good fucking luck, Annie Oakley.
I'm running and shooting.
What is this, RoboCop?
I don't think so.
Not with that taser.
Yeah.
Could you run?
What is the distance someone could be?
And in this example, you can't stop.
You have to be running with the gun.
How far ahead of you could someone be running away Wild West style?
And while you're still running, like with a six shooter, you could confidently like one shot.
I'm running to what you're running to.
You have to be running also.
Is it a taser?
Like a Western, like a six shooter, any six shooter of your choice, whatever the one you're the most comfortable with.
Because you always see people running and gunning and i know the reality is someone like you would
stop carefully aim put if i'm all right so like like in tombstone where there's sort of walking
but shooting or like i don't know how like do i have to like run you have to be power walking
like pretty quick um i'm gonna pretend like i can do what they did in tombstone when val kilmer like throws
his fucking jacket off comes up with the 12 gauge and starts starts laying justice down
um they were kind of walking through the barnyard there you know 30 or 40 yards or something like
that that wouldn't be that wouldn't be a man-sized target yeah like a guy running away but it's not
but you can shoot him in the back. It's not in a way.
It makes it even harder, though. He's a rapist.
It's Clint Eastwood
himself.
Why not shoot him?
I bet Clint Eastwood could still
sling some air. He'd be hard to hit. He's thin.
Yeah, he stayed
thin all these years. I suspect he's getting
thinner all the time.
Probably. Nobody gains weight in their 90s.
You ever see that Space Cowboys movie
where he goes to space?
I didn't know he did that.
So the idea was that
these guys were like Gemini astronauts,
like the first stage, or maybe Mercury.
They were from one of the early NASA things.
They didn't go to do the Apollo shit
and go to the moon or anything.
They got phased out.
But now there's a problem with a satellite or something
and all the equipment is
from their time. One of them
wrote the code and the other one
has trained on it. They bring up
Donald Sutherland, Tommy
Lee Jones,
Clint Eastwood, and
maybe James Garner.
They send them all to fucking space at like 75 or some shit it's pretty pretty cool movie there's a part where
they're all 75 at least and they have to go through the NASA training they're jogging and
stuff but the thing is that they cheat Donald Sutherland through it because he's a genius so
he can just they just tell him what the eye chart is and he can memorize that that's no problem but he's blind as a fucking bat he goes qr3 qrb lmno hh3r
and they're like that's perfect well no sir he's like it's the i did the bottom line let's save
some time and get out of here honey i want to drink he's 75 she's 30 and then he puts she goes
wow and then he puts on the thickest coke bottle glasses
you've ever seen and goes oh these these are for these aren't for for seeing this is just for style
he's blind as a bat um but clean eastwood is like ripped that the whole reason i brought it up
there's a part where you see him like not only is it ripped he's like still it they let you know
that clean eastwood still fucks and he's ripped. He's like working on his Corvette in his garage and his horny
50 year old wife comes in. He like picks
her up by the waist and sits her on the
countertop. He's about to molest her.
His arms are all bulging.
He's got no shirt, no sleeves on and then they
show up. They establish he fucks and he's a
cool 75 year old. And then right
then, you know, the general shows up. Colonel,
we need you back in space
or whatever. Fun movie.
Space Cowboys.
The general's like 45 years younger than him.
He's like 150.
Everybody's so goddamn old.
He can worship someone half his age.
But the fact that that guy's still alive.
Is he 95?
Yeah.
You can tell some people are going to...
Seems like skinny, tall people.
Not too tall, though. after about like six or it's diminishing returns,
like a tall, skinny, like six foot eight guy.
He's not going to like, no, he's not making it to 90, but like a six foot two lean.
That's probably about like Clint Eastwood size, right?
Yeah, right around there.
Normal.
Someone like Barack Obama, like Barack Obama is going to live probably to be like 93 oh for a longer dude that he's got that presidential health care i'm torn
why do black people not live as long is it because their health care is worse or is there something
else going on i don't know um it's everything that this isn't racist it's just higher i guess racist people always quote stats but um yeah there's a heart disease is a diet higher rates of disease higher rates of
obesity usually stuff in america comes down to obesity probably fewer of them are insured
probably fewer they're obviously poor yeah um you know all those things but um i i've always
maintained that skinny people fade away and you
know they make their way through the alzheimer's stage and just eventually fade into death
and fat people snap off you're making fat seem like the way to go
it is what it is yeah it could be well in your 70s start picking out like
become one of those japanese hot dog eaters or something so you get a cardiac event i'll go
through getting fat again at least three four more times in my life so
this is about that baked into the one of them at 70 yeah uh did you guys watch the new episode of
fucking from yes no so bad i i forgot i canceled
my mgm subscription and i went to watch the one from last week and it didn't and i had to like
sign up again for six dollars and i was like i guess we'll never know what what happens it it
it's still the same like basically the first season coasted off of a really interesting idea.
And the second season is just still lack of communication,
ill-timed panic attacks and other bullshit characters fighting over shit that
isn't hard to work out at all.
Yeah.
Can I,
so they,
they killed a monster last episode episode not not this current one
the first one last week's episode they killed him fucking monster and uh so this episode begins
there it is laying out there in the fucking ground dead and i'm like all right let's crack
that bitch open this will take like 30 seconds anybody got a big knife no they fucking horse
shit around about dissecting this thing
and that asian kid is such a goddamn pussy he's never i hope they don't let him ever get laid
i hope kenny never gets any pussy he doesn't deserve any pussy because he's the biggest
maybe donna yeah i know punishment no donna should face it him he that's that that's where
that's where he'll be i want i want see Donna like, yeah, you little bitch,
grinding her clit on his nose.
That's what happens when people misbehave.
They have to get in the box with Donna.
They have to deal with Donna's fart box.
You're going in Donna's box.
It's a little different.
No! No!
No!
She comes in wearing
the worst lingerie you've ever seen.
It's just like a men's flannel shirt that she's cut in certain ways to make it sexier, and it's just awful.
She just looks like a butch.
Well, she looks like herself.
No, dude, they took the entire hour to get the thing cut open.
They were like, all right, let's take it inside.
No, we can't take evil inside we don't know anything
about it it's like yeah that's why i want to dissect it pussy and like why do we need to go
inside give me the knife give me the fucking knife i'd have been carving into that bitch while i
could cry i'd stab it in the middle and fucking pull down like act like it's a goddamn deer cut
it open but you know what cut it into little pieces first so if it does come back to life
you don't have to be scared i thought maybe inside they had like all the equipment they
need to do a proper autopsy not really they got a bed in their scalpel they got some tools from
the shed literally and uh is there a bed or a desk i forget what i thought it was a stretcher
of some kind it was an appropriate bed but hell shit take a knee on the ground outside this isn't
our buddy.
What's Floyd doing while this is happening? Taking a
walk, a nice walk in the woods?
Oh, he's there right in the middle of it.
Right in the middle of it, in the argument.
You know, it was just
an hour of that. I hate
this fucking show.
The whole way through, I'm mad at it.
I'm mad at it so much. Fucking shit-ass
show. They need to get the game of thrones
season eight treatment from their fans and just be like you fucks ruined something that could
have been good that's if it sucked from the start if it never had any potential i wouldn't care
about this show it just fly under the radar like 80 of shows do but instead they ruined something
i wanted to watch yeah well even worse is like the realization that it never even had the legs to be good because it having legs to be good would mean that there were baked in explanations that that made all of this dovetail together in a way that's satisfying and cohesive.
But like, it's clear that's not going to happen.
Its potential was a mirage from the start.
We didn't know it.
You know, it.
Oh, by the way, the acting is awful.
If you watch it and just watch the actors a little bit
and see how they overreact.
The writers are terrible,
but the actors are right there next to them.
It's just bad from top to bottom.
Someone handed them a good idea and
watch them wreck it yeah there's just no no content i really want to watch right now even
the stanley cup final vegas is wrecking them have you seen ted lasso no i have not is that the
comedy fun so it is a comedy um what happens is an American Division II football coach, who's beloved
by everyone, goes to Europe
to become a soccer coach.
Football, see?
You might say he has an
indomitable positive spirit.
You might say it's toxic positivity.
But he just goes
out there and turns these misfits
into a team.
I'm about finished season two.
There's only three seasons and I'm loving this show.
I'm looking forward to seeing it.
I want to know what happens next.
I need something.
I could, I could use something pretty light.
It's light.
I'm up to season five of the Simpsons again in the background.
So we'll,
we'll see if that continues.
Yeah.
That's such a funny show.
I last night.
I, uh, uh what i can't
go back through the simpsons go back through seasons one through ten you're gonna be you're
gonna catch yourself cracking up at like how many good jokes and good episodes there are you'll be
like oh my god i forgot about this i forgot about that bit all the little jokes that you wouldn't
have caught as a very young kid you'll catch now like very very very very very funny but um last night i made some new candles a pretty solid batch i
mixed lavender which is one of my favorite scents kyle's not a big lavender guy. We discovered in text. No, you're wrong.
It's a relaxing,
nice, yellow smell.
You want some sort of butternut,
vanilla.
I like that stuff too.
I want something that smells like yellow.
That smells like yellow? Well, I have
some lemon oil I might use to make some candles.
I've done
lavender many times. It's one of my favorite scentsents probably top five and i wanted to mix it with something like clean
and sharp but not just lemon uh and so i used i'm gonna say i've done it with lemon before like
lemon lavender is a common combo it's really good but i the other sharp scent i had was cedarwood
which is like another okay like sharp clean smelling one and
that like i literally googled i was like what are good scents to combine with lavender it was like
lemon and i was like i've done i have that it's like cedarwood i'm like it is beyond amazing i
have cedarwood oil that i can use and so i i melted a pound of soy wax and mixed half ounce lavender oil, half ounce cedar wood oil,
melted it,
got it to one 85,
took it off the,
the heat or no,
I,
I fucked it up.
I bought candle dye that I wanted to diet a very light,
like lavendery color and tricks.
Okay.
And,
but I poured way too much in.
And so it's like a deep purple
and but that doesn't impact the scent of it the scent is probably the best candle i've ever made
half lavender half cedarwood it's clean smelling it's super relaxing smelling uh i've got one
burning out there right now because i needed to test it aner was the right size for the wick that
i have because you need to make sure the wick's not burning too hot or it'll burn up
a lot of the scent. If it's not burning hot enough,
then you get that shit where there's a bunch of wax
on the side of the candle.
Tunneling is my nemesis. I struggle
with it. Sometimes I'll do
like, I've done four
wicks in a fucking candle.
These wicks are all thin.
They're not burning enough.
I have like um i don't i don't know what it's called like a tiny little spear and i'll heat it up over an open flame on
the gas stove pierce that shit all the way in the candle and insert a wick i'm like motherfucker
you're not gonna tunnel on me it'll just be like two more w. I have broken at least three glass jars because the flame's too close to the edges,
but I haven't tunneled for fuck.
Tunneling doesn't happen in this house.
No, you're just breaking glass.
That is a hilarious way to handle a candle.
It's like, no, fucking not tunneling.
This will explode before it tunnels.
See, it depends what you're going for. These smells, right? Like Woody just wants his house to smell nice. not tunneling. This will explode before it tunnels. But, yeah.
See, it depends what you're going for with these smells, right?
Like, Woody just wants his house to smell nice.
That's what I want.
You go with lavender.
No, you want your house to smell nice for women.
But if you go in there with lavender, they're going to be like,
oh, I love this.
This reminds me of my grandma.
Oh, my pussy's dry today.
Just like grandma's.
No, you want baby power. No, they like that's all i wear that's all i wear they smell that in the back of the brain
thinking about breeding yeah that little that little reptilian part of their their brain that
wants to make babies they're right when they smell baby powder you can put your hand on their stomach
and you can feel you can feel that thing cooking in there.
That's the same thing I do.
I use Dirty Diaper.
It fires up their motherly senses.
It makes them horny.
It's like, fuck, I made them skip too many steps.
Now they're wanting to breastfeed.
That's what Sam Hyde told that little boy that was his son in that sketch.
He's like, you wearing cologne?
Axe body spray.
Axe body spray?
Yeah, that's real good.
That's real good.
You don't want to be wearing that.
You want too much?
You want baby powder.
Baby powder.
He's like, then you dump them.
Then you just dump them.
And you make sure that they don't know your real last name
or your first name and you just bye-bye bye-bye you're gone and that kid's like
well he's a little kid i don't know the young kid i see how i can't get past the fact that
all of sennheim's humor has a victim in it. There's somebody losing.
Oh, no, no.
They're actors.
The kid's an actor.
Yeah, this is an actor.
Well, I guess the hypothetical girl is who I'm empathizing with in this situation.
I can't stop.
Oh, no.
I don't think he.
The joke is it's a horrible father giving bafflingly bad advice to a child and seeing a child's
like unknowing acceptance of it. bad advice to a child and seeing a child's like i wish i had a black kid i wish i had a black kid
and said you know i i came in a lot of black chicks uh over the years i might have a black
kid out there can you imagine man if you were black i bet you'd be good at sports i bet you'd
be like running scoring the big touchdown winning the game and i'd be like that's mine that's my
boy that's that's my ninja my ninja right there and he says it he goes hard
r on the first one and it's like and that kid is just sitting there fishing with no line
he's just miming fishing yeah uh that's what my favorite bits oh have y'all seen it's on netflix
all quiet on the western front yes very good so what is the world one this i have oh my gosh it i watched it with jackie
and i think we both found it a little hard to get through it it yeah accurately it brings it
it brings in the misery of world war one you know what i here's what i took from it
fuck around and find out first person shooter that's what this movie should be called. I know it's based on a great novel or whatever that I've heard about forever, but just never read. But look, I'm watching this thing and it's great. It's this whole statement about war, especially the Great War. And it starts out and these kids are so fucking pumped to be in the army oh yeah they're they're they're almost maniacal they're
smiling and laughing and so overjoyed to have the uniform and uh it's a beautiful movie it's one of
the best movies uh as far as like the way it's composed and everything that i've seen in a while
it was real fun i like how they hit you with those uh with the way the the sound um i don't
even know what to call it when they hit you with those little like, dun, dun, dun.
Just a few notes, like to punctuate
different things in the film.
It's a score, but usually scores are more musical.
This is...
Riffs, these little riffs to be like,
you're like, a little unsettling.
It's really well done.
More unsettling.
There was this moment where you see sort of the machinery of war.
Man dies.
His uniform is pulled off.
He's thrown on the ground.
The uniform goes back.
Wash, clean, sew the hole, put it on a new guy right back to the front.
That same uniform just making loops, you know, one of the new guys.
They didn't sew the hole.
And he was like, there was a name tag in the back of the coat. They give the new recruit our main character. And he's like, oh was a name tag in the fucking back of the coat.
They give the new recruit our main character.
And he's like,
Oh,
I got someone else's.
And they're like,
happens all the time.
Probably didn't fit the line.
And he tears it up.
But you can tell I watched with the dubbing on.
Cause here's the thing.
These cocksuckers are German.
Now don't think Nazis,
all of you idiots who didn't pay attention in history.
This is the world war one.
This is the Kaiser. one this is the kaiser okay let's go at every awful scene in the movie where we saw how grim and
horrific war is all i could think was fuck around and find out you fucking crowds get them get them
the germ when the french would come and fucking there's a part where the french show up and they
just burn all the germans alive with flamethrowers and they're crushing them with their tanks and the germans are like nine nine
and then they're like they don't even shoot them they burn them alive every step and and our main
character's horrified of course oh no oh no it's like yeah where are you again where are we right
now france we're in france right now this is what happens in france
if you don't like it germany's that fucking way you pieces of shit i love that 16 year old getting
burned alive who's there because of his own volition you know he was he volunteered he
volunteered to show up he he forged the signature they volunteered in the same way that young Americans
in World War II and shit, they were fed
propaganda and sent to a
front line where they got roasted.
Way worse than Americans. Americans,
we showed up in the war and we kind of...
Are we not all responsible for our own actions?
Perhaps we shouldn't have to pay back
our student loans as well.
We're all
responsible for our own fucking actions that
kid was 17 or 18 i can't remember which and he forged a goddamn signature to get there because
his mother was forbidding him to go fuck him fuck his german comrades i loved watching him die every
fucking one of them and each death was better than the last the one guy had like suicided himself
with a fork at the end i was like yeah choke on it choke on it pussy you don't get to be a cop
the kid got shot over for fucking duck eggs?
Yeah. Smoked.
I bet that kid went hungry many a night after you took
this fucking goose. That poor little kid with his
head shaved over there, fucking in his
grandpa's farm, just trying to survive
during World War II. Fucking German invaders
coming and stealing our goose? I don't
fucking think so. Right
in the guts. Suck on it. Maybe you'll be dead
tomorrow, but it'll hurt
it was great fuck those pieces of shit i could not get behind the germans as the good guys because
they weren't i don't care that they were innocent though the kids do you not like understand like
trying to track a likable character and understanding the complexity of their story
within the confines of the war and sell me on it the war wasn't despicable the french were
being invaded germans are on their land that's what i'm saying wasn't the first time they do
not recognize that they are not monolithic and that there are individuals within that movie
that were shown sympathetically because they are sympathetic characters that were dragged into a
conflict that is bad does not benefit benefit them, actually kills them,
harms tons of people in France,
and you're finding empathy for people within that.
No, no.
I also don't empathize with the Japanese or the Nazis, though.
But then again, I love my country, unlike some people around here.
Look, when I see cowboys and Indians, I'm rooting for the guys with the pistols okay when i watch
world war ii come on let's let's get those japs not always the guys in a western it depends on
what's the lead up well no i'm always i'm always on the cowboy side 100 of the time uh manifest
destiny you don't like sometimes the cool tactics of the bow and arrows?
That's kind of neat.
Nah, that's horse shit.
I think the bow and arrows were better than people gave them credit for.
The Native American ones?
Yeah, maybe I'm comparing it.
Obviously, if you have a lever action or a six-shooter or something,
then that's a pretty good weapon.
But bow and arrows, you can like 30 arrows on your back, whereas
there aren't many guns that have that kind of rounds.
You can reload them pretty quickly.
It takes a lot of skill to operate it
well, but
I don't know. They're pretty lethal,
but you can fire quickly
and you can hold a lot of rounds. It's got something
going for it. They never won.
Every time they ever won, they had guns. That's why they won.
They did take nothing but L's
for a couple hundred years.
Is that true? Because I've seen movies where they won for sure.
No. 1883?
Yeah. What's the name of that enormous
like, what's that estate full of Indians
now? It's like
Oh, no. Estate? No.
There isn't.
We won.
Is past estate state state of mind
yes
the problem was the guns
they had guns
you know we like to make
there was like four different factions
Kyle
this is you we're talking about
we're in
10v10 battle, right?
Would you rather be on the side that had muskets or bows and arrows?
Muskets.
Muskets.
I'm not so sure because of the reloading around the muskets.
Five times a minute?
Let's go.
Y'all are fucked.
Well, it's one time a minute in my hands.
Because you've never shot a musket before.
It might be zero times.
I'm not sure I'd get it right.
Yeah, right?
You think that's bad, Woody?
Let me give you the bow now.
Before, you got to shoot a man.
Now you're just hurting your fingers.
Triple digits.
Just give me fucking three months.
But I can operate it.
And Taylor, didn't you get into archery?
Or was it just the axes?
What'd you get into? No, I can shoot a. Taylor, didn't you get into archery or was it just the axes? What did you get into?
I can shoot a regular bow.
If you give
me a gun...
A musket.
See, the lever action...
Let's all agree. We're on team rifle.
Lever actions, people don't know. They're just
a bit shy of
semi-auto. You can shoot them quickly.
What's the range on a musket?
How far can that fire accurately, Kyle?
It depends on which musket we're talking about, right?
Because musket kind of encompasses a couple hundred, three, four, five hundred years worth of technology, right?
There's different ways to load them and there's different ways to fire them.
There's flintlocks.
There's ball and cap. There's that old-timey and there's different ways to fire them. There's flintlocks, there's ball and cap,
there's that old-timey shit where you remember flashing the pan?
There was a pan of powder there and then you've got a wick that's burning.
And when you pull the trigger, it's not snap, boom.
It's slowly putting a burning wick down into the pan of powder.
And there's a thing that slides out of the way.
Anyway, if you give me the one where i've got the fucking
tin of powder and a ramrod i go boom well powder pour the powder fucking bullet ram it down there
cock the thing and shoot i mean i feel like a trained man can can shoot that every 10 seconds
no fucking problem and don't forget it's a big iron and steel club that he's holding when he's
not and those bows and arrows they had weren't shooting too hard i just can't imagine it the
problem with if they shoot me i'm not going down you i'm not i'm gonna still be effective as a
fighting person you're gonna have to close distance and like massacre me and that's what
native americans have uh did they have like composite bows no no no actually like composite bows no no actually like composite like so the mongols used like where you layered
wood and it was more powerful okay okay i was like no i'm pretty sure carbon fiber came later
oh yeah no certainly not carbon fiber but like like the mongols fucked shit up with their short
bows that were composite because at the time at least in their
region the only way that you could shoot that hard was with a big long bow and you couldn't do that
from horseback and so they could shoot these really high velocity rounds from a shorter bow
from horseback because of the composite makeup of it but i don't think that the native american bow
yeah native bows were not composite they were
what like 40 pound draw weight is what he said like yeah that's really nothing that's that's
that's weaker than the shit i think what they would do um like at least you know i watched
the history channel is they would they were mostly horse archers i guess when they were
trying to kill white people with guns and they'd sort of rush in real quick get a shot off and then
right away to be an evasive target but if we we're all in a field together, you know,
you're 100 yards and I'm 100 yards and you start coming at me,
man, I'm going to kill two of you before you can get there.
I'm going to kill two of you for sure before you can get to me.
And then I'm the guy with the big steel and iron club
and you're the guy with the bow and arrow.
I'm guessing you're going to your tomahawk or your knife or something.
Probably going to whoop.
On a 1v1, I'm going to win all of those, right?
Against a tomahawk?
I'm picturing them old-timey muskets that are just steel and wood.
It's heavy as shit.
I'd take that every time.
It probably depends on who's more practiced with their weapon.
Plus, I'm going to have a six-shooter, right? I'm going to have
one of those old black powder revolvers
that each chamber is
loaded with a cantilever thing. I've never used
one of those in real life, but you don't
quickly reload those. It's a whole process.
You've got six quick shots.
Maybe I'm wrong. I don't know.
Maybe it was a YouTube video or something I read.
Somebody made a pretty convincing argument
for bows and arrows that with the way they reload and the mobility and the simplicity
and a trained guy with a bow and arrow was a little more effective than you might have thought
i've heard that too but i mean proof is in the pudding like the they lost every fight badly
like like really genuine, like bad.
We genocided them real good.
Like every big battle was a
wasn't close.
Custer's last stand.
They had guns. Lots of guns.
Oh, did the Indian guys have guns?
Of course. That's what I'm saying.
Anytime you hear about an Indian massacre or Indians
beating white people, they had guns.
There was never a circumstance where a bunch of
guys showed up with primitive gear and
come at us!
That's not how the cartoons I saw
displayed it.
There's a Netflix show.
Who said that?
Blow his fucking head off.
It was me. Bang!
These guys are playing for keeps.
I just don't think it'll go well.
So Ukraine's interesting right now.
Still no winner.
It appears that Russia blew up a very important dam.
This dam, I saw a video of it, and I'm like, this is a really, really big deal.
There's just so much water upstream of the dam.
I was like, what does that downstream area look like when all that water goes?
It's incomprehensible how fast and how much water was flowing through this demolished dam.
And then the dam was a hydroelectric dam.
It also supplied the cooling to a nuclear power plant.
And now several villages and people who live downstream of this thing are going to die
the tactical advantage for russia is that i i guess it really reduces the amount of places that
um the ukrainians can go in their counter offensive so obviously right there you can't
drive a tank through that it's it's pretty much a lake but there are other areas where a tank
would be able to cross that are now going to be closed because there's water there's too much water flowing zach can you put before and
after i kind of want to see how so there's one um the red yeah you're the reservoir that you know
the river that that's on the the big side of this dam uh that is the water that's used to to cool the
nuclear power plant but they say that won't be a problem for like many months because okay one thing it's been turned off for a long time the nuclear power plant, but they say that won't be a problem for many months because, for one thing, it's been turned off
for a long time, the nuclear power plant has,
but they still have to cool the rods,
the Don fuel rods.
Those always give off heat,
and then just the whole thing in general
gives off a small amount of heat,
but they've got a gigantic reservoir of water,
like tanks there on site,
and then the water level will have to drop significantly
before they can't grab water from it. So that's
just them being silly. And then the amount of electricity
it makes pales in comparison.
That dam makes like 380
megawatts. Megawatts to me
are like unicorns and leprechauns.
But they said the nuclear plant made
57,000 or 5,700.
So it was like, you know,
15 times
more. I see now that it's completely destroyed that's enough
well actually no it's not so so how much water was to the left before
none i don't know just like a snow it was downstream but there we go okay it is that's
not as big of a difference you need to know is knocked off so apparently the to the right the reservoir was it had too much water because
of russian mismanagement that's what i read maybe it was the russian plan i don't know to fill it up
and then bust it but uh uh the way that it flows through was pretty intense and i think that what
i'm seeing is strategically the russ Russians now have to defend less land
because of the bigger river.
It didn't look like that big of a deal to me.
Because like, if you're going to cross a river, you're going to cross
a river. It's got to be such a pain in the ass to fix
a dam. How do you, like, what do you
do? You have to like build like a temporary
smaller dam like above it or something?
Yeah, Taylor, you build a dam so that it's
dry and then you can put the dam there. This is
easy. See, that's the infinite dam problem what do we do to put the dam back this seems like dude
there's one guy in ukraine now he's like this they could not get worse like this is the shit
he's like last night or two nights ago whatever he's like god at war this fucking shit sucks. At least I work at boring-ass dam.
Dude, we'll see.
The Ukrainians are blaming the Russians.
The Russians are blaming the Ukrainians. But it appears that every advantage from this dam breaking is towards the Russians.
I mean, their positions are flooded now.
And I'm watching videos seven months old.
Like, Ukraine has a dam problem.
This is a huge vulnerability.
If people bust these dams, it's going to hurt them.
Did the dam flooded out where the Russians were, Kyle, or no?
Yeah.
So the Russians own this territory,
but the Ukrainians are launching their counteroffensive,
and it's making this natural barrier more formidable.
Is what I'm seeing.
What do I know?
I didn't even know about this damn three days ago.
Yeah,
I didn't either.
But since then I've been watching all these videos on it and like who benefits and have you watched any damn collapse videos on YouTube?
Oh,
yes.
Oh,
I almost always hate them.
Everyone is like, we got rid of this day and we did a great
thing and i'm like what no it was really cool before yeah there was a lake it was lovely
you imagine bring back the lake have you been to the lake hartwell dam yet
uh i mean i spent a lot of time in lake hartwell but the dam i just see from the air
i have never been to the Lake Hartwell dam.
Wait,
you're talking to me,
right?
Of course.
The guy who goes there frequently.
Yeah.
All right.
Um,
you strive over it sometime.
You just drive out of town and heart.
If you're at,
when you're in Hartwell,
like you're on the La Cabana Walmart side of Hartwell,
you just keep heading that way.
And that takes you to the dam and you over it, and it's quite a sight.
It's pretty cool.
I mean, it's not one of the seventh wonders of the world or anything.
It would have been.
It's pretty good.
Like, if that existed 800 years ago, it would have made the cut.
Yeah, right?
Yeah, for sure.
It's since not even top 50, but there was a time.
You see the modern seven wonders of the world,
Christ the Redeemer in Brazil.
Like, come on. I've heard that that smaller than you think it looks huge it looks awesome on top of that mountain but it's
like the real cool statue is that giant fucking chinese peasant or something that they have in
china that's the coolest statue on earth and the fact we have no politicians talking about
mongolia your statue is m Mongolia that has the big one,
right?
They've got that guy with a fucking sword.
We looked at it a while back.
It's like the biggest statue in the world.
It's there.
There's a cool one with that.
There's a giant Chinese peasant.
There's a Russian one where it's like a,
uh,
like a space,
like a,
like a spaceman,
like launching with like rockets.
That's not the one I like. There's one where it's Russia and it's a chick with a like a spaceman like launching with like rockets that's not the one i like
there's one where it's russia and it's a chick with a sword i think yeah that i think is really
cool i didn't know the china all right well yeah the chinese one blows the pants off of ours or
india india okay okay i'm glad she is 102 meters that that's the one that i like that's a cool one
i like that that's ukraine yeah that I like that. That's Ukraine, yeah.
Oh, is it? I thought it was Russia.
In Kiev.
Oh, I'd knock that shit right down if I was in Russia. Maybe I'm mistaken. I thought there was a...
It is a little cheaty when the pedestal's that big.
Like, Statue of Liberty, absolutely, pulled a little bullshit there.
That Statue of Unity is sick.
The fact that we're losing to India
by, like, a factor of two almost in our
statues i mean is that how we you know really great uh an economy or people their statues
yeah i mean like statues we've fallen so far behind yeah we need more statues and mars ahead
of us what are we doing well yeah my Myanmar, they probably devoted a lot to it
because they're like, well, we don't have a lot.
Let's make a statue.
The average Myanmarian must think aliens built it or something.
It'll always be Burma to me.
That's the right country, right?
It is, it is.
Cambodia.
No, it's Burma.
Cambodia was the Khmer Rouge with pol pot right talking about
have you ever seen uh um the rambo movie where where that's where he's in uh myanmar it's really
far so it's got dexter's wife um you know the dexter series blonde chick uh it's she's in it
and she's with these missionaries all these white people who are going to go do some good for the
myanmarians or whatever.
It's a fucking war zone, by the way.
And the movie starts off with the war zone lord, like making peasants run through a minefield and betting on it while they all explode.
If they can, you know, right away, we know the bad guy is the worst.
And then then we find out he's a pedophile.
So the bad guy is a warlord murdering pedophile who fucks little boys.
And Rambo is like he works works as a Cobra catcher.
He's like hiding out in the jungle.
He never went home after Nam.
Like he doesn't want to deal with it.
He went home, but things went poorly if you saw the other movies.
And he's like catching Cobras for this like Cobra show.
And they're like, too many Cobra.
Bring me Boa Constrictor.
And he's like, these are good Cobras.
I don't know what your problem is
i tell you too many cobra and he's got a whole fucking bag of cobras it's like how many do you
need the guys are there dancing with the cobra and it's pretty cool show like anyhow anyhow the
dexter's wife and these other white people need a guy to take them up river and rambo's like you
don't fucking go there blah blah blah like trust me they won't buy it finally he agrees to take them up river and Rambo's like you don't fucking go there blah blah blah like trust me they won't buy it finally
he agrees to take them and it just
goes to shit right away Rambo's got to kill
a bunch of people who are going to rape the woman
her pussy ass beta like
buddy was like why did you kill those
natives he's like they would have
raped her 50 times and gutted her
or whatever Rambo says something
like that well he was right
about how the bad guy was.
Then they part ways.
She was the one. Rambo goes home.
Yeah, wait.
Oh, gross! Get out of here!
You all kidnapped!
Except you, gross old lady!
She's like 21.
She's 22 years old!
Oh, you disgust me! Get your elderly ass out my jungle so rambo leaves the missionaries they go off and they get into more trouble next thing you know
some rich guy shows up some mercenaries he's like hey i i own the church that these kids came from
it's like a mega church these are my mercenaries i want you to send them go with them up river
find my people bring them back and so that's the movie it's rambo with a team of mercenaries going in to get
a pedophile warlord in cambodia and save dexter's wife i'm glad they really give you motivation yeah
it's a good fuck dude it is so brutal there's a part where rambo gets this not the rapist that
i mentioned earlier but a different rapist and rambo like sneaks up on him and grabs his throat right the little like a like but he doesn't stop and you're like where's this going and probably
he just goes and pulls his windpipe out like just pulls his esophagus and windpipe out of his
fucking body with his bare hand and just goes and the guy's a loud way to kill someone young
woody was looking at like 50 year old sylvester
stallone thinking like what is grandpa gonna do in a situation like this current woody is like
yeah this this seems right yeah and to his credit his shirt's on the whole time but you can tell
he's like big and bulky and you've seen him in the last year. He's still big and muscular guy in his 70s.
Yeah.
I mean, it was high then.
He had full head of black hair in this movie.
There's one part where he gets on a 50-cal machine gun
and it's attached to a truck.
So the guy's sitting in the front seat of the truck,
but he's on the back with the 50-cal,
and he just points it down at the back of the guy's head
and goes, da-da-da-da-da-da,
and the guy turns to soup.
It's pretty awesome.
That's one of the most dangerous features of those trucks.
Is it?
Being able to shoot the driver in the back of the head.
I think they should get rid of it.
I don't think they should.
I came in handy once.
There's a little pin that keeps you from being able to do that
that prevents you from going down there.
I'd always pull that out, though.
We want full range of motion.
I don't have anybody on the front anyway.
Not anymore.
No, no.
I solo gun it now.
You guys ready to wrap?
It's dinner time.
Yeah.
All right.
PKN 459.