Quick Question with Soren and Daniel - Daniel O' Briden
Episode Date: April 3, 2024Goodbye girlfriend... hello fiance?! Daniel "single for branding purposes" O'Brien is tying the knot. Him and Soren discuss rings, traditions, and how planning a proposal is a good lesson in committin...g adultery. Plus New Soren is an Off the Grid Guy and we've got some exciting podcast news.Thanks Rocket Money for sponsoring the podcast. Try it at RocketMoney.com/qq. it could save you hundreds a year.
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Hey, everybody. Podcast coming up in just a second, but the little bit of housekeeping up front. If you like seeing Daniels in my faces, get ready, because after this week, we're going to start doing some more video podcasts from our respective homes. We won't be together, but you'll be able to see each of us and get a little peek inside of where we live. If that's, I don't know, your thing, maybe one of our feet will accidentally be in the shot I don't know
I don't want to get your hopes up but anyway there's going to be video we're also going to
have some bonus content coming up more often bi-weekly we're going to be doing a little bit
of bonus content where we'll do an extra little something something for you all you can find that
on patreon you can find on apple podcast and spotify all the video content that we're going to be doing, you can find it across your platforms.
But if you're using Apple Podcasts, it's going to be audio only for obvious reasons.
You don't watch any videos on Apple Podcasts.
If you're dying to see our faces, though, we're opening this up to you.
You can see the ravages of time.
You can see entropy at work on Daniel and I, if that's a thing you're interested in.
And I guess I'm promising at this point one of my feet will be in a shot.
Thank you.
Enjoy the show.
I've got a quick, quick question for you, all right.
I want to hear your thoughts on what's on your mind. I've got a quick, quick question for you, alright I wanna hear your thoughts, I wanna know what's
on your mind I've got a quick, quick question for you,
alright The answer's not important, I'm just glad that
we could talk tonight So what's your favourite?
Who did you get?
When do I be remembered?
What's it out there?
Where did all that go?
Oh, forget it I sawren, Booy, Daniel, O'Brien.
Two best friends and comedy writers.
If there's an answer, they're gonna find it.
I think you'll have a great time here.
I think you'll have a great time here. So, hello again and welcome to another episode of Quick Question with Soren and Daniel, the podcast where two best friends and comedy writers ask each other questions and give each other answers.
I am one half of that podcast, author of How to Fight Presidents, senior writer for Last Week Tonight, and poor planner Daniel O'Brien, joined as always by my co-host, Mr. Soren Bui. Soren, say hello.
Hey, everybody.
I'm Soren Bui.
I'm a writer for American Dad.
Probably.
I mean, we're on hiatus right now, so we still have to get picked up again.
Otherwise, there'll be a new intro to the show from now on.
Speaking of poor planning, I don't have a fallback.
This job doesn't continue.
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Why are you poor planner daniel because soren i had this whole we haven't so for our listeners uh we we took about two weeks off for scheduling stuff and and spring break stuff and and some
health stuff and i i i had this whole idea i really wanted to
surprise uh the most important person in my life uh soren yeah a big striking piece of news i wanted
to do it like a big grand way on the podcast and have like a live reaction from from soren as he
learned this big surprise but i didn't i couldn't get my act together in time so i just had to to to text him very
anticlimactically uh that uh i got engaged or whatever and it was going to be you have no it
was going to be a huge moment for the podcast just just picture picture me uh let me just say how I would do it
okay so here's how I was gonna do it
hold on should we just
should we do it
so hello and welcome to
um
so here's how I was gonna do it
I was like oh Soren how was your week
I
I did a pretty fun thing
I went to go to
I got to go to a Broadway premiere
with my
ex-girlfriend and
Jeremy Strong was in it and
Michael Imperioli
Oh hold on
Did something happen?
Did you break up?
I'm still not used to saying fiance
Oh my little box I'm still not used to saying fiance.
My little box that tells me when I'm recording just went bright red.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, I didn't like that scream.
Can I ask you, did you, if, well, we have a couple of questions about this, but first quick question, if you didn't know that I had gotten engaged
and that's how I told you would you have
liked that the the the little play of yeah ex-girlfriend i'm still getting used to saying
fiance you know you know i would love that you know that when i had my daughter and we got on
the podcast and you knew my wife was pregnant ready to have a kid at any time i said my wife
is no longer pregnant that's oh soren you know who hasn't liked that joke everybody else every single other person
do they when you because you run over uh you're going like 40 miles an hour when you get to ex
girlfriend uh do other people make you stop or do they just let you continue they let me continue
and like about richard kind for 45 minutes the joke relies on them stopping me and asking what
happened because otherwise i just like i just continue talking about my life
but neither one of you is really paying attention because no you don't have actually anything to say
uh that's too bad mentioning it uh trying to do the same the same drive-by move in the the work
slack and no one saying anything or responding and i could just like from hundreds of miles away i
could hear them privately slacking each other did something what it doesn't
they look like they're happy on instagram what the fuck is going on what should we say should
we ask nah he's a private guy don't bring it up now here's my my first question is yeah obviously
obviously you're entitled to tell whoever you like whenever you like
how many cut out at what feels like a very crucial moment. I heard obviously, obviously. Sorry. Well, okay.
Obviously, you can tell whoever you like whenever you like, but you tell me in terms of like the people in your life.
And when did I find out in relationship to everybody else?
You are pretty close to last.
Yeah, I thought so.
Okay.
Of the important people in my life you're dead last
of like random people i've come across in my life you're still pretty close to the bottom
it's that's how it always ends up working is like you've got somebody specifically that you
want to tell and then all of a sudden like shit just gets in the way and you're like uh-oh
at this point it's awkward do i should i just never tell them right it was because we we we got engaged on a friday and we were uh the plan was to record the podcast
like the following monday or tuesday right and neither of us are on you know i'm telling my
family obviously neither of us are on twitter anymore I know for a fact that you observe Instagram from time to time,
but I don't know. You're not like an active participant in it. You don't
like post anything. You just have it to occasionally lurk. So I thought we can post
this to Instagram and that still buys me a couple of days of cover. So we did do like an official Instagram thing
and I thought there is a chance
that he will not see this for days.
And if we're recording the podcast on Monday or Tuesday,
then that's like perfectly within the window of secrecy.
And I even, I told Gabe and the other fellow
who works on this podcast with us,
it was like, hey just just a heads
up i know you guys are on instagram uh i don't i haven't told soren yet so don't mention it when
we record and they were like got it and then the day the record came around and i was so sick that
i was like i we can't do it today we have to push to tomorrow and even like going from tuesday to
wednesday to record would have been fine within my window but then you couldn't record on wednesday and we had to push a full week and then it was like oh i don't
know things are getting weird the balloons are in the car um that's so exciting and uh for people
who are listening and they're like man soren doesn't sound very excited for dan i got very
excited for him when i found out i was in my hometown in my home garage where they grew up and jumping up and down and uh for a lot of reasons i was
very excited for you and then this sort of evolution happened in my excitement that became
very excited for me right then i get to go to a wedding like it's gonna be a fun wedding and i yeah there is you can you can um
we we checked with the the venue we're on the ground floor so you can jump there's no yes
there's there's it's it's fair game for anyone to jump if they want to so you should be
that's generally the only thing you care about yeah so. That's why I said I was in my hometown. I was in the garage.
Garage is the only place I'm allowed to jump.
I know.
Okay.
So, yes, I'm very excited, Daniel.
There's a lot I have to do in between now and then.
I have to get ordained, obviously.
No.
I got to come up with a playlist.
I got to learn how to bake a cake.
Okay.
I got to come up with like,
I need a walkie talkie obviously for the event on the day
so that I can get everything,
everybody in their places and everything.
That seems like the easiest thing to accomplish.
The walkie talkie.
Who is on, wait, actually,
who is on the other side of the walkie talkie?
Oh, I got to find somebody
for the other side of the walkie talkie.
That's a fun, really sad sad like single panel comic of a kid trying to buy a single walkie talkie there's a little charlie brown the clerk
being like we don't you they don't come as one oh why would they um but yeah informing you was
like the worst of all worlds because if i'd known that i would have
to uh wait a week and a half and not surprise you on the podcast then i would have told you
like within 24 hours of the news and then i didn't and then as it got closer to this record i thought
oh there's a chance save the dates will go out uh and it's probably better if he hears it from me first than i save
the date so i just had to like very boringly and dryly text you like hey just trying to get ahead
of the news cycle here buddy just trying to cross some t's it's like an ex-girlfriend finding out
yeah i just don't want any i don't want you to hear it from anybody else. I'm getting married.
Okay.
Did you, can, can I ask now?
Because, uh, I it's, you can confirm that you, you have access to look at Instagram.
I do.
Did you, did you know, did you see like our reel or did someone, did one of our former
coworkers, uh, mentioned something to you or maybe even did one of our former co-workers uh mention something to you
or maybe even like one of your current co-workers who also follows me on instagram and be like hey
pass along my congrats to daniel did you know i didn't at all until i told you i didn't even have
an inkling from the trip that you were doing i didn't i didn't even get the sense no i hadn't i
was completely blindsided but i didn't even know get the feeling No, I was completely blindsided by it. I didn't even get the feeling that like, well, he's going on a trip with her.
I wonder if this is going to be it.
Like I had nothing.
And everybody was, boy, this was like better than an M. Night Shyamalan movie where everyone was just like, no, he should experience it for himself.
Because I didn't get anybody telling me, spoiling it for me.
That's good.
I'm glad that there's some decorum amongst audiences still.
I have a bunch of questions for you.
Okay.
Fortunately, that's all the time we have.
Show us quick question, but you knew that already.
I actually can't even do this
without the stuff in front of me um so first of all i saw the i saw what picture you sent
me a picture of of her with the ring on it seems to be like sort of i don't want you to describe
the ring to me it's like what do you mean okay so it's seeing i get like the sense that's sort of like a double um ring like it has two pieces that go around is that right yes and no it in the picture you saw
it looks like there are two rings that go around it's because this is a family heirloom ring it
was her grandmother's ring and the two parts that you're seeing are the ring and the band yes which fit together okay and uh i i i i think it's very cool
we're we're not sure exactly the the the plan of if if she'll wear both of those all the time
because it does to the untrained eye certainly look like a uh a wedding band and an engagement
ring together do they unlock from one another like you could wear them independently yeah okay
do they unlock from one another like you could wear them independently yeah okay and and is it does it have a diamond on it yeah sure do you have any sense of what like cut and clarity and stuff
of that diamond or is it part of the heirloom it's part of the heirloom okay that clears up a lot of
the questions i had which was did you have to learn all that shit did you have to learn ss1
and stuff like all these designations for different cuts and clarity and and everything of a diamond no i did not i did have to because i i
uh because i knew the ring was going to be an heirloom ring i also wanted to just like
separately get some nice earrings for her so i went to a fancy jewelry store and got
earrings and learned a little bit about carrots and got like a certificate that explains the
provenance of the the the diamonds in the earring yeah and the carrot and all that all that kind of
right they're dripping blood oh absolutely good i was like show me a picture of the of the house
where people used to live before it was torn down for this um now it was uh uh lab grown or factory
made not factory made lab lab designed petri dish yeah but that yeah but all that stuff when the the
the person at the jewelry store is like holding up this card that has the information is like
this is important you need this forever and i was like oh no i'm not used to owning things that need a separate
thing to prove what they are yeah yeah that's i mean when we recently got a safe and i emptied
out my safety deposit box that was at the bank and like going through all that stuff i was like
oh yeah here's all the old ring shit like here's like that stuff that i have to keep for as long
as she owns that ring and it's the way that i got mine was i i went through
so it was actually a college friend who had started doing like arrow heirloom jewelry
but it wasn't from my family so i had to learn all of these things that i it was like cramming
for a test like you know it all so well backwards and forwards for three weeks of your life and then you never know any of it again
yeah just like a driver's test just like a driver's test uh dan i'm so excited for you i
i i'm really excited that you got to do this as an heirloom that's like
this is like a family ring yeah because the ring is such a nightmare otherwise uh does it did it
fit her already or did you have to figure out how to get it set we're gonna get it fitted we need
to get it reset yeah okay oh man uh it is it is very exciting it was it was certainly uh not that
i i would have shirked from the challenge of learning about rings and, and picking one out for her.
It was a nice,
like a real relief to know this was the ring that she wanted.
And,
and it was a,
a simple matter of asking her mother if I could have the ring.
Right.
And once that was taken care of and like,
and as I was asking her,
her wonderful mother,
I was like,
I know this ring is also important to you, but you know it's the one that she has her eye on.
If you don't want to part with it, that's completely fine.
I have another plan.
And it was really great that she parted with it because I did not have another plan.
You know how you lie to your in-laws immediately?
That's how I started.
Very confidently saying, I have another plan.
Don't worry about this.
This is totally fine.
Did you ask their permission?
I did, yeah.
You did too.
I told the order of events.
How did you feel about that?
I felt great about it.
The order of events was I hung out with my parents for dinner,
and I told them, hey, I'm going away to Florida next week and I'm going to ask my fiance's parents for permission and for the ring.
And I just wanted to let you guys know you're the first to know that this is going to happen, that things are moving.
And I felt very confident, very comfortable.
And then I talked to her parents and I asked their permission and they said yes, which was the answer I was hoping for.
Yeah.
And yes to the ring also.
And I felt very confident and very comfortable.
And then like as because this was, you know, about engagements.
It's not like the movies where it's a complete surprise.
I'm not going to not going gonna blindside her or anything like
that we were on this path uh so it's not like i thought there was a chance that she would say
no so i was like comfortable and confident this entire time but then once all of the
stop and slow down signs were gone once there was like no more uh doors to unlock approval
from my parents approval
from her parents i was suddenly very nervous i i because then it was just like well now it's just
on you kiddo now you just have to like like decide when you're gonna do this and there and there's
there's really nothing nothing is stopping you at any moment and that that was like
the i was surprised by the the level of nerves that I had.
Yeah.
Yeah, me too.
Okay, so we're at the fun part here.
I want to hear how it happened.
Are you willing to divulge that on this podcast to all 14 of our listeners? Not really, no.
I mean, there's, I, it's, here are the three things that I'll say about it is just knowing that i was like
uh i was very ready when i asked i was i just like felt like truly in the moment this is this is the
this is the right time i want to do this there was the the nerves aspect of it where it was like
there was a a full day where her parents knew and i knew that
her parents knew and she was the only one who didn't know and just the stress that i was gonna
say something i was gonna i was gonna slip or say the wrong thing and that like a surprise would get
uh uh blown in in some sort of way it was like really making me i think less pleasant to be
around yeah where i thought like i can't i i i don't think i can take another day of of the stress
of managing a secret from uh my at the time girlfriend now fiance i'd like that was weighing
on me more than anything else.
We're just like, I don't like having a thing that she doesn't know that I know that a lot of other people know now.
So I wanted to, like, get that feeling out of me.
And also, this was our second day of a four day trip visiting her family.
day of a four-day trip visiting her family and i thought i wanted to do it really soon because like i i you know you want to i i was just tired of not being engaged to her and i i was like what
am i gonna do i'm gonna wake up tomorrow and and still not be engaged and then what what if i if i
propose tomorrow then i only have like two nights of being engaged in Florida instead of the three
nights engaged in Florida. You know, it's just like, like there was just like everything inside
me was like, like, do, do this now, get the, do this, do, do this. So you can like, I just wanted,
I want to be engaged as soon as possible. Once the speed bumps were out of the way
and permission had been granted, it was just like, well, well let's, let's just be engaged now,
of the way and permission had been granted it was just like well well let's let's just be engaged now please that's great thanks did you get down on one knee i did and did you see it coming
uh a little bit i mean it's i i think once i started my my little prepared preamble speech
yeah yeah yeah like you could i could really tell like oh she's really
she's really listening right now so she knows that there's no way that this speech ends with me
saying and that's why i really really like yeah okay good night did you write anything that's
such a good team when we used to do okay so so I know that when you used to do stand-up,
you wrote out everything.
You wrote out size, you wrote out stumbles,
you wrote out everything that you were going to do on stage
in your performance.
Now, I'm curious, did you wing any of this
or did you write this all out first, memorize it?
I wrote an outline.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes yeah yeah yes very nice yeah i felt good
about that too because i also know that like if i had written uh a full script first of all that's
insane it was insane when i did it in stand-up to write all the pauses and uh and hold for applause
moments uh it was always an insane thing to do and second of all i thought uh i don't
really need this completely scripted because i know what i what i what i feel and what i want
to say and another part of me uh the worst awful part of me is like if i write this thing and
and she jumps in and interrupts or a phone rings, then I will turn into a
grouchy, cranky monster and be like, never mind.
Forget it. Nope. I forgot what I was going to say.
We'll do it again tomorrow. We'll try again tomorrow.
Yeah, that's
so I'm glad that you didn't
because also you want to be able to feel
like you're in the moment too. Like you want to
be saying things that you're feeling
at that exact moment. I get
that's all great.
And it would have been crazy for you to, to have scripted the whole thing.
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slash qq rocket money dot com slash qq here's here's a crazy thing i did do that i don't know if if you did uh when you proposed to colleen
is i did definitely google which knee is the right knee to get down on for a proposal i didn't know
there was one there's bare there barely is the is like, there's not really a right way, but, you know, it's the same thing as like the sequel to, the plural to cul-de-sac.
It's not, there's not technically a correct way, but cul-de-sac is more correct than cul-de-sacs.
And so there's not a right way to get down on a knee but if you if you do want the right way
get down on your left knee oh really or it's bad luck right it's like divorce in 10 years
no you just look like a fucking idiot did people were there people around you when it happened no
her family but not not we were we were in a in a private moment okay that's but we could immediately then
celebrate with her parents which was nice did you okay have you checked in with her at all about
like any of the shit that you said and whether she actually was listening to any of it because
my experience was neither one of you remembers a thing that happened in the moment okay that's great because uh i remember so so to answer that
question uh she she did not remember and i have in fact given a version of my speech
two more times i've i've i've now proposed three times just to like to remind and refresh which is
which is a a lovely fun thing that we get to keep reliving um but
while i remember the the proposal the rest of the night we immediately just started facetiming
all of our family and everything like that uh and that all went by so fast and was such a blur
that i i'm glad to hear that you also didn't remember everything.
And that, that's, that's a common thing. Cause it really leading into it. I just think like,
we've talked about this. We know we're going to get engaged. We know we're going to get married
someday. So it's just gonna, you know, things won't be different on one side of this question
to the other side of the question but they like you go
a little bit crazy your brain goes nuts and and and you just get like uh just just wedding madness
for a second it's gonna be the same thing on the day um that's what i hear you you will want to
know each other's vows afterwards because you will know and also like the speeches from the other
people just it'll be gone immediately like you'll laugh like in the moment you'll be very present other's vows afterwards because you will know and also like the speeches from the other people
just it'll be gone immediately like you'll laugh like in the moment you'll be very present for it and then immediately afterwards you'll be like man your best man's like speech was great and
you're gonna be like oh yeah i bet it was i bet i think did you film it did you get it
it did you get it yeah that's that's it's it was the exact same way it was really cute in like a fun delirious moment immediately after proposing uh and her saying yes and her having the ring and
having like tears in her eyes she's going but wait did you did you say it did Did you ask? And I was like, yeah, babe, totally.
A hundred percent did.
Did I ever say yes?
Yeah, you did.
That's why we're on the phone with my mom now.
You both get shit in the head.
Can't remember anything that just happened.
That's great, Daniel.
I'm so excited you did it right i i felt a little weird about asking
her parents because i wanted to also respect her autonomy but i tradition and autonomy at
the same time and it was like it was tough absolutely it's here's the the the crazy
thing about tradition is that i do like it and respect it uh if i had asked permission and her parents said no we don't think
you're right then like then it's war then i have to be uh like an asshole to this family and be
like well jokes on you i wasn't actually waiting for your permission i uh i this was a formality
uh i love your daughter and she loves me.
And like, peace, we're out of here.
Okay.
We just got a whole, a whole table just freed up for us at the wedding.
This is actually good news.
We had a lot of people.
So Colleen and I, when we first got engaged, we then sat in a hotel and we were like, okay, let's think of like the people that we need to invite.
How many people, how big will our guest list be?
We got to about a hundred and then we were like, okay's think of like the people that we need to invite how many people how big will our guest list be we got to about a hundred and then we were like okay now let's do
our friends like here are the people we have to invite and then they were like oh shit this is
this is big and and we started to feel very embittered that like oh why are we obligated
to invite these people that we are
barely civil with in our lives who are like family when who are the people we really want at the
wedding are these other people it's like well because you make enemy even further enemies out
of any like aunts and uncles or cousins and stuff that you don't invite and so yeah we were just
like really sweating it the minute we got engaged we're're like, oh no, oh no, oh no.
It's, I think we're blessed a bit to be older at this point where there is much less of the pressure of making sure you invite all of the people that you don't actually want
at your wedding.
Like if this were a decade and a half ago or so
and I was making a list of invites
I know there'd be people that my parents would be like
well you need to invite this person
otherwise it will be difficult for me at work
because I see them every day
but my parents have been retired for years now
so it's just like invite the people that you want
that you spent time with
as we were stressing over this and talking about it
while we were still in florida shay's mom was just like just think about who you actually want
to see in the pictures who you want to see at your wedding if it's not someone that you would
want to have a beer with in real life don't invite them yeah to the wedding like that's
gonna be our guiding principle for this whole fun thing here's can i tell you the no go ahead i just
wanted i was gonna say as a suggestion i mean obviously take it or leave it you get married
destination wedding culver city california uh we actually uh checked and there's there's nothing available but your buddy i got a great backyard no
very romantic partially secluded i'll add oh partially that's good yeah i do want some
freaks yeah i do want some strangers some good rubberneckers and uh and like for the most part
very very uh low volume leaf blowers around here
you're gonna love it uh here's some other uh proposal things that i'm i was i found myself
very surprised by okay um because i got the earrings uh like a week before the our trip and because they were part of the whole
engagement package and i realized after coming home with the earrings just how uh i never walk
around with secrets from her i'm not i'm not like running for fiance of the year or anything like
that i think it's just a symptom of the fact that as soon as i see her after we're apart for any amount of time i tell her every thought in my
head and every single thing that happened to me so even like i was uh as soon as i saw her when i
got back from the jewelry store i wanted to tell her about this interaction i started to say the
cashier from the jewelry store and i was like wait no she can't know about the cashier from the jewelry store. And then I was like, wait, no, she can't know about the cashier from the jewelry store.
Then she'll have follow-up questions.
So I had to be like the cashier from the other store.
Yeah.
Saw that my last name was O'Brien and asked me if I had a great time
yesterday.
Cause yesterday was St.
Patrick's day.
And it's, I'm, I, it made me realize a,
I tell her every, every single thing that happens in my day and B, not everything that I, that happens to me is interesting.
I don't know.
It's, uh, I mean, planning a whole proposal is honestly great, uh, practice for, uh, adultery.
Yeah.
You really learn how to like, what secrets to keep and what to tell about your life and like how to twist certain things so that they don't ever find out about what you're actually doing.
It's crazy having a like a box with jewelry in it that I have to put in one of our pieces of shared luggage that she is not allowed to get into.
Because there's nothing in our home that she's not allowed to get into because there's there's nothing in in our home that
she's not allowed to get into and even like when we're we're driving i have my phone plugged into
my car and the you can see the text messages that i get on the screen and you could play them and i
had to like not not feature that for yeah the first time in our relationship because what if
my mom texts and and says good luck with your
proposal or something and i just have to like suddenly be suspicious and sneaky in a way that
is is like really uncomfortable to be walking around i i did it in um peru and so i flew to
another country and i sat there for a long time beforehand thinking, do I bring this ring, the most expensive thing I've ever bought in my entire life, do I bring it to another country?
And even like being on the plane, they gave you those little slips and like, are you bringing more than this amount of money?
Like, are valuables worth more than this amount of money on there?
And I was like hiding my answers from Colleen like we're kids taking a test.
Yeah. Like with a shoulder in the way like and then and brought it with me but like yeah the entire trip thinking like i i planned so hard just around that ring because i
was so scared of it it felt like a hobbit like i i sewed it into a handkerchief kept the handkerchief
in my pocket every single day very conspicuously used it to blow my nose
and stuff because i don't carry a handkerchief and that's a real red flag your your character
needed to justify why he had this new prop yeah so like i was boy i was chewing the scenery up
dan i was like doing a lot of prop work just to like make sure she saw me using that. And then, yeah, on the day, cut it out.
Yeah.
I don't think she totally knew.
One thing that I think would be very funny is if you sensed that Shay was like aware of what was happening.
If you got that earring box and you conspicuously like put that places like in the luggage where it was like right on top or something like that.
It would be so fun for her to find that that get very excited and open it and see earrings
that would have been fun i like that a lot she would have been so mad yeah we wouldn't be able
to talk about why it's i don't know why that's always my impulse like i used to try and make
you as angry as possible when i give you your birthday presents and i i like i i just love somebody who gets very very angry and has nowhere they can put
it and then you surprise them with like good news but that anger still lives in them right so they
can't do anything with it they're like legally not allowed to do anything with it anymore right
you can't let the air out of the balloon so now it's just sitting there uh oh well well maybe next time i get married you know what i'm saying
uh you're gonna here's a here's some things that i'll tell you about uh this portion of
marriage because like yeah this is like pre-marriage right so like you've got we're
we're fully we we hit the ground running immediately with with wedding planning we
want a wedding as soon as possible and so that's we we had like maybe 24 full hours maybe 12 hours
of just like hi fiance hi fiance isn't that fun that
we're saying that now and then immediately into like contacting venues and contacting photographers
and all the all the many people that you need to contact for uh this very expensive party we're
gonna have have you yet slipped up in front of her and called her your girlfriend not yet no that fucked me up uh
she has slipped up uh and at work and called me her husband whoa yeah nice you guys are in fast
forward that's great that's right you so you have the so you guys are already finding the venues
are you gonna get a videographer or am i doing that too uh no you're not you're off the hook for that okay don't worry
about it we are gonna we're we're we've got a venue we've got a bunch of our our things lined
up because i think we we both are treating it like a marathon and a sprint where you're just
like keep go as fast as you can and put one foot in front of the other. Because we want to there are the aspects of planning a wedding that are are more fun and emotional.
But there isn't as much of a time crunch on them.
Like we're figuring out what we're going to say and exact songs for exact moments, that kind of thing.
We want to get to those parts and also breathe a little bit. So
let's get everything booked that, that needs to get booked. So we've been just
really pushing through on all that. Are you going to do dance lessons?
No. Do you think I, do you, do you think, do you really think she needs them?
You, we did it and I'm actually glad we did it for our first song uh not because like there's
nothing wrong with just like holding each other and sort of like swaying back and forth but we
really colleen is a planner by nature and i'm a prison i like to be presentational so in both of us there was like
this like moment in our venn diagram that was like no we both agree on this just has to look good
and so we wanted to know that we were doing we had the song picked and then we brought the song to a
a dance instructor teacher sure and the teacher was like okay yeah this is just a waltz we'll teach you how to do a like a box step or whatever like okay and learned it and felt way more comfortable
having done that we've we practice it in the cracked offices when she come like late at night
to collect me we would do it in the cracked offices that's really sweet maybe we'll maybe
we'll do something like that it also is a sorry i didn't
even get to the part where i think it's just so important it's a super intimate thing that like
just helps in the lead up to the wedding of like it's this very sweet and uh separate thing from
everything else and it's it's only the two of you and it's not logistical really it's just like
this is just feeling the music and it's like a fun thing to do where you have to take
carve this time out each week or whatever to do this thing with your significant other all right
that's pretty sweet maybe is it gonna be a what season fall yeah i knew it yeah colleen asked
i was calling when i told colleen she was very excited for you as well. When I told Colleen, she was like, I hope it's not in the summer.
It'll be so hot.
And I was like, you are the last person who has to worry about that.
Daniel will ensure that this is not a summer wedding.
He would not let that happen.
I promise you.
It's good to feel seen and understood uh i i wonder if you
have this so uh because obviously our our amazing engineer producer president of podcast operations
gabe knew that uh i got engaged and as soon as we came on the pod today he said you sound different
sounds like something there's something different in your voice and like he knows so he's playing
it i gotta say it feels really good because when you're the the when you're half of the
affianced couple you get to to walk around with a shining symbol that things are different right and that's
great i don't want to take anything away from that and i also don't want to walk around with a ring
but things are different for me too and no one can tell
i got my my uh taxes done last monday and they like, marital status, you're still single.
And I was like, what are the options?
Like, well, married, divorced, widowed.
Oh, not engaged?
No.
I guess I'm still legally single for the government.
It sucks.
Okay, next question.
I don't want to walk around with a shirt or a sign or something.
Yeah. it sucks okay next question i want to walk around with a shirt or a sign or something yeah it's that's me waiting at a bar when i'm showing my id and hoping they see that it's my birthday just like begging that they see um oh yeah ids should also have your anniversary on
them so i can get congratulated on that too.
Well, I'm so excited for you, Daniel. I'm so excited for all the things that are
about to come with this as well.
Thank you. I am too.
It's, you
know, we're trying to be like
funny and light on the podcast.
I don't need to be too sweet about it
or anything, but things are different.
It's fun and sweet.
I like walking around being engaged.
It's cool.
Do you feel – maybe it's too early for this.
Do you feel any difference in your relationship at all?
How do you mean?
What I'm driving at is Colleen and I, we met met in college so we knew each other a very long time
we've been dating for like 10 or 11 years before we got engaged and when i leading up to it i was
like not super excited i was just but not like dreading it either i was just like this is a this
is the next step like this is just what we're now we're now we're committing and people would always be like are you excited i'm like i don't know uh to be married i i guess so and then when we got engaged like this thing just clicked where i was
like we were a team like we were way in it just together and i felt great i felt great with around
her and with her and even like i do feel that i felt that i feel all that i i wasn't sure what
exactly you were getting at but, it does certainly feel like there
is, uh, a change that is, that is simultaneously like, like, uh, uh, an intimacy thing, but
also like, uh, we're, we are both working towards this, this shared future, the shared
goal that we have.
And we're, uh, because we're, we're both very active planners in putting this wedding
together we're really like in the trenches of this together too in a way that is very bonding i can't
i yeah i can't imagine you were not active in your wedding planning i know that like the the pop
culture stereotype is that guys do nothing i don't know how true that is didn't seem like it was true
for you it's certainly not true for me it's the two of us who are doing this thing together and reporting back to each other
at the end of every day and checking in throughout the day.
And it is a real surprising bonding experience.
We're both also fielding questions from other people in our lives who were like so
what's next what are you doing have you did that have you done this have you done that like and
we're you know it's the two of us back to back fending off questions from people as we were
trying to to move this engine forward and it and it feels very uh very very cool it's it's
even though we we agree on a lot of things and we and we do
everything together we we we don't do relay races together we don't like put together complex
pieces of machinery or anything though the wedding planning is the first thing where it's like
all right you have your job i have my job let's do it let's get this together let's let's re-team oh i'm i'm slacking on this one thing can you pick up the slack here and then
i'll pick up the slack over here great break and then you separate and you go and you do your
things then you come back together at the end of the day and like regroup it's really really
i'm making it sound very unromantic but it is i swear yeah it's just experiencing a different aspect of the relationship
that you didn't know existed yet like finding a new room where you're like oh shit we're also
really good in this room together yeah um no i know that yeah you'll by the way that happens
again with with not to like fuck you up but like that happens again with kids right i i imagine
because like because because you're right for about the new room because for
so long it's like i really like cooking with her and i really like going on vacation with her and
then suddenly it's like she's really good at talking to vendors too wow i didn't know she
had that that's cool yeah they have like a you see find out that your significant other has a second gear and you're like, holy shit. Yeah.
You kick ass.
So what's new with you, man?
Oh, nothing much.
I have a gun now.
God almighty.
What a fucking twist.
Yeah, I'm gun people um i like guns and i now i have to like talk i have to say things like
uh welcome to california i have to say things like welcome to california and land of the unfree
and stuff like that. Sure.
That's fun.
Can you hear that dog barking?
I can.
Yeah.
It was perfectly timed with you talking about your gun,
but just like created in my mind that you've moved to some compound somewhere.
Good news.
I got a gun and six dogs and things are good man we're off the grid i had some
chickens i don't know i don't know where those went i gotta build a coop or something um yeah
it's i i own a gun now i i had to do i in the same way that like when you're shopping for a ring i
had to take a test that was making sure that i was capable of owning a firearm in
california and you have to study for this test and it is very much like i'm just like learning
all this information at once about guns and not i know everything about guns on the terminology
those gun people love their fucking terminology man if you get up here if you say the wrong name for a thing they pounce they love
that shit yeah um but anyway this is it was my dad's and then his great his dad's before him
um that was sitting in our safe at home and i happened to be going home and i was like and my
mom was like i want to get rid of these things and i was like please don't get rid of this thing it's a family heirloom and so i brought it back with me got it yeah uh do you
you said you you you you didn't want it and you can't get rid of it yeah do you like it at all
yeah i mean i was it's it's a new thing and i it cool? Of course. It's like Blood Meridian cool. It's like a Western gun. It's a single six Ruger, which means that it's got that great double click noise when you pull the handle with the trigger back. It's a revolver.
Everything about it is very cool i mean it's
if when i was a child this would have been my dream yeah now that i'm an adult and understand
the responsibility of owning a gun i'm like oh fuck i will go i bought a kit for online that
i'm going to use to clean it and learn how to clean it and everything and then i'm going to
probably shoot it maybe i'll take greg burke we'll go shoot it sure and then and then after that it will just sit in a safe i think forever
uh our mutual friend greg burke who most people would recognize from uh thousands and thousands
of comedy videos both at cracked and elsewhere i think he would probably be curious why you've only seen him like twice in five years
and both times it would be to go shooting somewhere because he's not bringing that to
the table no it's always me he's my shooting friend um i i do message him a lot about going shooting and then occasionally dan
for your benefit i will be like we should try this other range dances there's one up in sonoma
i can't find it on a map because for a long time dan's big plan was to conspire to get greg burke
to go wine tasting with him yeah and and people have often wondered and he has wondered too because
i was i was just constantly inviting him up to wine country with me and he was like is this like
is the the joke that you're in love with me and that you are hitting on me and want to take me
to wine country to get me drunk and it's like buddy it's not. I don't know what the joke is yet.
It's building.
The joke, I keep asking you to go to wine country with me and you don't want to go.
That's all I need to like confidently tug at this thread and see where it goes.
Yeah. It was a very, it's such a fun game when I realized what was going on
that I immediately tried to get in it.
And I started to be very eager to go to wine country with you,
which gave you an opportunity to express that,
no, it wasn't about like a group going.
It was about you and Greg. It added a fun layer for me asking Greg
and you chiming in and saying you would drive.
And then me, as cold as Greg was to me,
I could then go to you and and status shift and be
like no it's just the two of us and greg's like no it's not the two of us because you presenting
it to greg it always had to be very airy and light and fun like just like a casual thing
but every time that i try to join i was like no this is important this is an important trip that
just greg and i will be taking um anyway yeah memories
i have a gun now you have a fiance we're all we're all getting things
i think that'll do it for our podcast yeah i think so too so excited for you though daniel
what i'm excited i think that i expressed this but just just in case i didn't fully express
it i am so pumped i'm so happy not only that like you're getting married and that you are
excited about this but that you found this person that you want to spend the rest of your life with
and that shea came in your life and that you guys are so happy together
it makes me very very happy because i've always wanted this for you i in a way that's not uh like
in order to fit in with society you have to be married or anything like that
i know that you are a good you'd be like a great husband and i wanted this for you
hey thanks buddy i really appreciate that there's nothing I can add on top of that.
All right.
That's very sweet.
This is a quick question.
You already knew that.
We are Daniel and Soren.
You can follow us on Blue Sky now.
Daniel might be back on Twitter, but if he's not, you can follow us both on Blue Sky.
We're the only two there, so just go.
You'll see the things that we post.
You can email us at qqwiths Soren and Daniel at gmail.com.
You can follow us on the podcast on Twitter at QQ underscore Soren and Dan.
We also have an Instagram.
It's QQ underscore with underscore Soren underscore and underscore Daniel.
We have a producer, sound engineer, editor,
president of podcast operations or Popo as we like to call him.
That's Gabe Harder.
You will not ever find him.
We also have a Patreon,
which is patreon.com.
The theme song, if you liked it,
that's by Me Rex.
They're a band out of England.
I shouldn't say that.
I don't actually know if they're out of England.
Are they in Great Britain?
I'll just say that.
Me Rex, they're from Great Britain. Don't cut it in Great Britain. I'll just say that. Merex, they're from Great Britain.
Don't cut it in this game.
You don't need to put any extra information.
I need to know where they live.
Their people are going to want to know where they live.
If you like their music,
you can find it on Spotify and iTunes,
anywhere you listen to your music.
Or you can go to merex.bandcamp.com,
download full albums. If you want to see music. Or you can go to mirex.bandcamp.com to download full albums.
If you want to see video of Daniel and I
doing podcasts, not this particular
one, but others,
you can find that at youtube.com
slash at QQ podcast.
I'm also going to be on
Creature Feature coming up really soon.
Creature Feature is our friend Katie Golden's podcast.
And we're going to be talking
about aerial plankton, so if that excites you that's pretty cool i was on two recent episodes of the
1900 hot dog podcast sean baby and robert brockway talking about the movie yesterday and then for
their patreon subscribers we have a bonus mini episode that goes so bonkers off the walls it's
really fun great yeah listen Yeah, listen to that.
Listen to our friends.
Alright, bye.
I've got a quick, quick question
for you, alright.
The answer's not important, I'm just glad that
we could talk tonight
so what's your favourite?
who did you get?
what about me?
what about you?
oh forget it
I saw a movie Daniel O'Brien
two best friends and comedy writers
if there's an answer they're gonna find it
I think you'll have a great time here If there's an answer, they're gonna find it
I think you'll have a great time here
I think you'll have a great time here