Rooster Teeth Podcast - Burnie's Lies and Empty Seats - #499

Episode Date: July 3, 2018

Join Gus Sorola, Gavin Free, and Chris Demarais as they discuss belly buttons, flat-earthers, HOAs, and more on this week's RT Podcast! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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If he can survive the drive, also starring Stephanie Beatriz, Samoa Joe, Nev Campbell, Will Arnet, and Thomas Hayden Church, twisted metal, streaming now, only only on peacock. You're listening to Rooster Teeth Podcast number 499. If you hear something you would like to see from this episode, visit roosterteeth.com. Hey, welcome to Ro Lucid Podcast this week brought to you by Honey and by Ring. I'm Gus. I'm Gavin. We screwed it up. I'm Gus.

I'm Gavin. And I'm Chris. And I'm Gus. We wanted to have a birthday party for Barbara, but she's not here. I feel like we're good at throwing parties for people who don't come to them. This is the best kind of parties. Like Jackson.

Then there's no pressure. Bachelor of party. You don't have to make sure it's good. You just have to have say we did it. Yeah. I think it's a great party. It's been great so far. I wanna know what happened to these pink ones

that now kind of like labia No, no, just kidding we knew Barbara wasn't gonna be here. We are but you didn't replace the spot. Oh, we got it We got it. Okay. Oh, let me let me talk about what happened all right about why there's only three of us instead of four of us a couple weeks ago, Bernie texted me and said that he was not going to be available for the July second because he was going to be shooting something. I said, great, don't worry about it. Then last week, after the podcast, we had a little birthday dinner for you. And you remember I was sitting pretty close to him and we were there at the restaurant

I said, hey, I just want to confirm, you're not available next Monday, you're going to be out. He was, yeah, I won't be available. Great. Fine. Then this morning, he texts Eric and says, Hey, I didn't get an invite for the podcast. Am I not on the podcast today? And I was filming all day long. So Eric starts slacking me and I'm like, what? He said he wasn't available. So then I asked Eric to ask Bernie to be here. And Eric asked Bernie and Bernie says, he already made other plans. So I'm bad. What is assistant right before the podcast started?

Slack me asking if the podcast was still happening. I mean, it wasn't on account. I'm very. What? So his assistant was asking right before the podcast started is what we're learning. And he was just walking about, oh, day here. He's here.

Yeah, it's he's definitely here. I feel like I'm bad at communication just because I don't respond fast, but he responds with nonsense. Like he gives me- No, he responds with nonsense information. Nonsense information. It's lies.

Yeah. It's not nonsense information. It's lies. Just flat out. So I was just like, all right, I'll get under care, whatever. MTC. MTC.

It's building anticipation for 500 next week. Oh, by the way, if you don't remember episode 500, it's gonna be a live episode at the state theater here in town. So it's gonna begin at 7.30 instead of five like normal. So if you normally used to watching at five, you're gonna, we're not gonna be here. Tune in two and a half hours later at 7.30 pm. It'll be just like the old days.

It's like the old time. And that's what we'll be doing it next week. One time, exception for podcast 500. I feel like I should say that. Why don't we just do it at five? That's what I said. Dude, welcome to my life, Gavin. Well, if it is,

it's to get people to show up to a live event right at five. That's what they said. They said it. Like, you should get people time to get off work. Oh, you're saying, you're saying, community isn't dedicated. Why I wouldn't show up We're sold out right yes, we're sold out but only because it's the seventh day Presumably right only because it's 10 30. I think we would have been five five, but whatever

And on the bright side, there's less traffic to go downtown. It shouldn't be as bad for us to get there So if this podcast is shitty and there's less traffic to go downtown. It shouldn't be as bad for us to get there. So if this podcast is shitty, and there's only three people, brings the bar down and then go straight way up for 500, which is good. I don't know about that. Do you think it's gonna be shitty? This one?

Yeah. How do you feel about it so far? I feel pretty good. I feel good. We got balloons, we got cake. Oh, some of these are blood, I can't allow before it ruins like the cake. No, I mean, have you ever seen a birthday candle go

all the way down? I guess I can. I never have. Let's let it be. These candles just get thrown away when they're caught or gone. How wasteful. Well, we curious how long it'll take.

We think bets right now. Look how long that wick is. It's already burned through a lot. Okay, I think that by 5, 19, it'll be gone. Not it. I was gonna say 5, 15. I was gonna say 5, 15. I was gonna say 5, 20. Okay. Ooh, all right.

Okay, so now we'll just wait. All right. Okay, we're not gonna talk. We just leave it on that shot for the next 15 minutes and we'll see who's right. Oh, you can see where I got stitches. I said don't talk. Sorry.

You already ruined it. All right, that's long enough. What up in your knee? I got stiches. I said don't talk. Sorry. You already ruined it. All right, that's long enough. What up in your knee? I got stitches in it. Great. I got stitches in it. I got hit with some shrapnel from shooting. Yeah.

Splat it. Do you see that video that guy throwing the air can into an oven indoors that was on Reddit. Oh, yeah, it was like a wood burning stove. It was really intense. What are they doing? He just said aerosol can aerosol can into like a wood stove. And it was like, it looked like a, they should all be dead. When it exploded, it looked like shrapnel and bullets coming straight at the camera.

For like a frame or two, you see like glowing red hot embers shooting at the person with the camera. And he turns away and then he comes back and like the room's half on fire. And they're just laughing. They're, oh! They're fine, I don't know. Yeah, embers are cool because if you get hit with them,

it's like it hurts, but it's never as bad as it looks when they like puff and go all everywhere on you. Have you ever been hit? But with embers? Sure. Yeah, I feel like I've been hit? But with embers? Sure. Yeah, I feel like I've been hit with, yeah, and like, especially like Roman candles and stuff like that. You know what hurts worse than embers?

Is oil when you're cooking naked? What's the worst part of the body to get cooking oil on while you're cooking? I mean, and why are you cooking naked, Chris? And you're so concise that you have no protection. You're all on your balance. I mean, it's like it can happen. It's your cooking naked. I'm like, yeah, that's definitely the worst place.

Chris, have you ever cooked naked? Yes. Why? Because I didn't have clothes on when I started cooking. I mean, it's like, what? Why didn't you put clothes on and then cook? Because I was already, what? Barbara showed What? Why didn't you put clothes on and then cook? Because I was already...

What? Barbara showed up. Why would you do it? You're gonna ruin our experiment! Happy birthday Barbara. Oh, no! What time is it? 506, we were way off.

Did you... Did you come all the way here? No, I was so worried. Well now you gotta eat the cake, your blue the candle out. Why don't you be on a bit of podcast? Cause I gotta go. Oh, okay. Take my balloons.

Happy birthday. You want some birthday money? I'm gonna go. We'll take the hat, though. There you go. It's stuck. She just, she just visited the cake. That was a visiting, a visiting thing.

That was a bad-ass movie, actually. Yeah, we don't. So, Chris, why did you just put clothes on in the cook? Uh, well, I don't, I mean, I could, but then it's like a whole other step and then if I get oil on them, then I have dirty clothes on. So you'd rather get oil on your one and only penis. I know like it's aiming, it's really just like a wake up

in the morning, time to cook breakfast. So you sleep naked. Sometimes, not always, but yes, sometimes. And then I'm just like go to the kitchen, get some water, and like I'm hungry, cook some eggs, oil, whatever, splatter, bacon. Bacon strangers. The fat of bacon went when it's like, yeah, a lot of splatter. I would love a day in the life documentary.

Like fly, fly in the wall, hidden camera, just following you for 24 hours. I wanna know, I wanna know how much stuff Chris thinks is boring and normal, but it's just so weird. Can we do a poll? Have you ever cooked naked? Is that something we can do? I gotta thumbs up.

They're putting it together right now. I have never thought to cook naked, because even if I'm naked, I think I don't want to burn myself, I would rather put clothes on. And it's never like I'm naked, I think I don't want to burn myself, I would rather close on. And it's never like I'm hanging out in my house naked either. So I can't believe you're in that state to begin with and then you immediately start cooking without putting something on.

And you just have to like cook with leaning forward. But all you could just put on boxes. Yeah, sometimes I'll do it in my boxers to be fair. If I'm sleeping in boxes, then I'll cook in my box. Or cooking apron? I don't have an apron. I guess I could do a in my boxers to be fair if I'm wearing if I'm sleeping in boxers Then I'll cook my book or cooking apron. I don't have an apron I could I guess I could do a towel around my front or Close or sure. I mean why we're looking at all these other salutes. I guess I could come to work in a towel Oh, you could put all your clothes on

You don't have to be all of them. I'm not gonna say don't cook with clothes on It's not like I have to get naked to cook. I'm just saying I have cooked naked. Have you cooked fish naked? I've cooked... Well, less... I don't think I've ever cooked fish for breakfast, so no. Okay. And I'm on your face recipe. In China only. Yeah.

GenoB says, I only cook naked when drunk usually. I could see that because you're making bad decisions. And it is definitely a bad decision. All right, do we have the thing? Go to roostee.com slash play. If you're watching live right now, and you decision. All right, do we have the thing go to roostee.com slash play if you're watching live right now and you can vote.

Ready, here we go. All right. All right, so we can watch it in real time and see how many people are weirdos like you. So it's roostee.com slash play. Wow, big jump out with yes initially. Ooh. It's pretty close.

So going the other way. Who is this in chat? Michael playing a saying, can the next steak off be naked? No, we're not doing a naik off. You've absolutely downright refused to participate next time, I'm an air. No, I'll participate, but someone's gonna cook me a steak. So why don't you just bring a personal chef?

Because then I'm arranging it. See, I don't, I've already done the work multiple times. I want to eat a steak that I don't have to do anything for. I want to be a bump on a log and I'll cook it. I'll cook it. I'll cook it. I'll cook you a steak and I'll bring it. No, wait, no, you cook the steak here.

What is it? I don't want a naked steak. But you rather have me cook you steak or Chris Cooky fish? I'd rather have you cook a steak. I don't eat fish. I don't like that. I don't eat fish. I was on fair question.

Oh, okay. Yeah. How do you cook steak? I don't know. I guess I just like on the grill thing. On the grill thing? Or the frying pan thing. On the frying pan thing. Yeah, you know, I on the grill thing. On the grill thing? Or the frying pan thing. On the frying pan thing.

Yeah, you know, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, big saucepan. I like to just eat the steak typically. I mean, you're relying on a good piece of meat at that point. Yeah, that's what I want. I want to eat a good piece of meat. Okay. When I was younger, I used to like putting A1. Oh, so we ended up at about 34% who are filthy animals and do not ever invite me over to eat at your place. When I was younger, I used to like A1 a lot.

But then as I've gotten older, I just like, I would prefer to have like just a good piece of meat that I want to eat. That's fair. And even like, I know, like, but then as I've gotten older, I just like, I would prefer to have like, just a good piece of meat that I wanna eat. That's fair. And even like, I know, like, you got a fancy steakhouse sometimes and they're like, oh, let's put a peppercorn or a Bernays or something. Like, no, just give me, just give me the fucking steak. That's all I want.

I forgot something that was really good this yesterday is I had Chick-fil-A Buffalo sauce and I was making some eggs and I'm like, I'm just gonna put that in the eggs. It was delicious. Buffalo eggs. Buffalo eggs. Or maybe that's what I said.

I was gonna think of a better name for it. The Buffalo eggs is pretty much spot on. It was so scrambled eggs. Scramble eggs. It was Buffalo sauce. While you were making it. I just like put it all, that's how I work, man. It's like, here's what like, here's base ingredient sauce.

So that was your dressing. Yeah, it was amazing. It was so good. It was so good. I would love to see you make bread. And at what point you would put the peanut butter in? Like, would you put the peanut butter on the flour? Wait, are you talking about make bread?

Cooking bread or making peanut butter and jelly? I basically want your end thing to be like peanut butter on toast. But you would put the sauce in. Put the peanut butter so early. No. I mean, I could make peanut butter and jelly. I'm not telling you. Wow.

Not telling you. What are you saying, man? I don't know your ass. What a weird thing to say. I've said if you were going to make a loaf of bread. If I was going to make a loaf. You probably put on the peanut butter and jelly before it's bread. Oh, I see.

That's actually a really good idea. No, that's a really good idea. That's a amazing idea. Because peanut butter doesn't rise. You don't know that. I don't know that actually. I'm really doing that. And it could, man, peanut butter and jelly bread.

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And then fused loaf. That sounds, it sounds dirty when you say that. It sounds really, really good. Apparently people make this. Oh, I see peanut butter, make this. Oh, I see. People are doing that. Yeah. All right, there we go. So it would be interesting to take finished dishes

and deliberately make them in the wrong order. Same ingredients, but just do it wrong and see if it is completely different and tastes better or worse. Isn't that like the spirit of what like deconstructed dishes are? Oh, is it? Whether like take it and then separate all ingredients

and serve it to you all separately or in an unconventional fashion? That's why you get here a lot, not this is the same really, but sometimes I would or sandwich or a burger and they just refuse to make it. I'll get like the meat on the base bun and then all of the salad-y extra bits and then the other bun will separate.

Oh, I think that's so you put the condiments on yourself. I get it. Yeah, I don't like that either. I usually don't. Yeah, I don't like that. I'm just there stuck in one of my things. So you're doing their job, you should get discount. I should.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I'm sure I think about hamburgers now. What's your favorite hamburger in Austin? Favorite hamburger in Austin? Okay, well, can I give you my fast food version? Sure.

What's the one with the broader burgers? Culver's. Culver's good. Culver's really good. And a good burger. It's gotta be some place probably downtown that I can't think of right now. One of the downtown burger places.

El Sao Pa. I've never had a burger there. No weird. They're like big and full of weird shit. I don't remember the one I like, but it's pretty spicy. Man, you said El Sao Pa, which is Spanish, you maybe think. I saw NPR tweeted something. I think it was earlier today, I should look this up.

They were declaring 2018 the year of the woman. That was on June 30th. They made a tweet declaring 2018 the year of the woman, but they wrote it in Spanish, but they forgot to put the enye in Anio. Does that make it different? What? They made it the the anus of the woman. that make it different what? They made it the the anus of the woman. They tweeted that 2018 was the anus of the woman. Maybe they had to delete that tweet and then post an explanation saying they deleted the tweet

due to use of incorrect Spanish phrase to say the year of the woman. Wait, that seems like bad design. If an in-yad difference between year and anus, it's a different letter. It's just like that letter doesn't exist in English, so you don't think about it. That would be like, if there was an omelow

over the you and anus, that means delicious. Or something like that. I knew it. I knew it. That's the anus of the woman. Wait, the anus of the woman's, what was it? The anus of the woman. The anus of the one. Wait, the anus of the, wait, the woman's, what was it? The anus of the woman. The anus of the woman.

But yeah, it's just, I mean, it's, it's not just an accent, it marks the whole different letter. So, but it's a letter that doesn't exist in English. It's a whole different letter. Yeah. I think the Spanish alphabet has 28 letters, I want to say. But wouldn't you still press N on the keyboard? You've probably called N down. Yeah, it's old N down. Yeah, but it's gonna end with a thing on it Yeah, but I mean, I wouldn't like would you count you with an omelette is a different led than you

Well, you could say I am L or essentially the same thing but with a little symbol above it But the different letters they will but they they're the same shape. They're both lines One one is a shorter line with a dot one of his is a longer line Yeah, so that's the same thing Right but the you with an umla is a you There's not a different like there's not I without it's dot and then an I Spanish has 29 letters in the alphabet. So what are the extra three? What was that one missing?

Well, you could say an M is just an M with an extra loop. Oh, that's true. That's true. That's a good point. How is that a good point? Or a W is two V's? Yeah. Or two U's.

Or two U's. It is a W again. The extra letters are CH, LL and the N, yeah. So none of those letters are extra letters are CH, L, L, and the in-ya. So none of those letters are extra letters. In-ya. To-N! No, it's an in-ya. Okay.

It's different. If it was an extra letter, I would have a different name. It is a different in-ya. In-ya. In-ya. Yeah, I guess. I guess. What you know what's the different letter?

The, uh, the German thing, the double S, whatever that's called. Oh, yeah. I don't know what that is. What is it? I could be with a drip. Employees that call that thing. It's all the rage in the memes, right? But the thing is, that is usually for a double S sound, but it is actually a completely

different layout of a letter. It's not like a B with a drip. If you can't even know this or you describe it. I can't go back to something that you mentioned earlier. Yeah. Do you consider like, for skin protection? Yeah.

Like, yeah, it's part of the immune system. It protects from infection. And it prevents rubbing of the sensitive parts when you're just walking about, keeps it fresh. Wash it though. Yeah. Well, I don't have to worry about that. Yeah.

Just if you decide to get one somewhere. I've seen that people have started protesting. Have you seen that? There's people who like protest male circumcision. Well, so legal for female circumcision? A little different. Is it? I think so. Yeah, because female circumcision is like

genital mutilation. Taking out. Taking out the the clip. Like entirely. I thought you just take out the hood. I know. I thought it was like you actually, I guess it's maybe depends on the... It depends on where you get it done.

It's just like a clip to me. Clip to me. Yes. Gursum. Yeah. I think it's weird that people do that and it's considered so routine. I don't know how that started one day.

It's like, yeah, we just had a kid, a little bit of his jik-aul. And then it's accepted. It's like, yeah, I think it's if few if because I've had the cause most people in England aren't circumcised. That's for Jewish or medical emergency or something. But you really can't talk to an American who's been circumcised and convince them that it's weird.

It is, it's so normal for them to grow up with it. It's really like some of your body got cut off. Right. It's like, oh yeah, you know, any time a kid's born, we cut off the last joint of the left pinky. It was, it's done. That's what you do. I mean, it's unnecessary.

The only thing, it's not like a umbilical cord, because you can't live with that. Right. That's going to fall off anyway. Right. Would it a bull andbilical cord, If you didn't cut it, what? Okay. So it's snipped and it's like tied off. And then it falls off. But what if it was just tied? What if you never detest at the at this end? And then it was just hanging with it just raw off. Probably.

Or would it leave like a would it heal up to a certain point? I think it would. What did ancient belly buttons look like? Now is what I'm wondering. Oh, that's a good question. Right, because our belly buttons look like that. It's the remnant of where you were connected. Like before, like you must be able to survive without touching it. Did people have like extreme outies? Like, so how when an animal, what a deer gets shit out, what end does it disconnect? Does it just fall out of the mother? I think someone just falls out. And then it just falls off the deer at some point.

So what happens with a baby if you do that? Wait, no. So what happens with an umbilical cord? It gets cut off, right? Yeah. Yeah, they cut it. And then, but do they cut it at the base? They let, they cut it and then it falls off on its own.

We usually it's cut base, they let, they cut it and then they, it falls off on its own. We usually, it's cut and then they like sort of, do they rip it off? They ramp it off and then it falls off. Yeah, I think they put like a little clip on it, right? Yeah, it's a make it. Three of us have never had a kid. Who's had a kid? No one. Well, we've all had umbilical cord. There's no, you don't remember?

There's no dads in it. Mike, do they clip it off? Yes. They clip it. Well, it falls off, they put a clip on it to seal it. Mike, do they clip it off? Yes. They clip it. Well, it falls off, they put a clip on it to seal it. They put a clip on it to seal it. You just kind of fall off. You eventually it falls off.

Okay, thank you. We were right, Ish. But yeah, I mean, kids must be born in some places where they just don't do that. Still to stay. Oh, I feel like it in a tribe. But they just tie it in a knot and leave it. I don't know.

I want to know what those belly buttons look like now. And I do not want to do a Google search for a weird belly button. I do not need to see that. We should start like a belly button book, coffee table book, belly buttons from around the world. What's yours like? Is it any?

Any? Oh, someone sent me a link. What is this? What were belly buttons like before humans knew to cut and tie off the umbilical cord? Oh, someone sent me a link. What is this? What were Billy Buttons like before humans knew to cut and tie off the umbilical cord? Oh. Oh. Wait, wait, can I, I want to see.

No, it's not a, it's not a picture, it's an article. Oh, why would they have a picture of that still? I don't know, maybe like an artist rendering. Yeah. Okay. Okay, so humans have had belly, but here's the gist of it. Humans have had belly buttons that look much like the ones we have today for millions of

years. That's the front version. That's Dennis. Yeah, that's boring. I wanted to hear some gross stuff. I've still seen a guy with that one. What? I saw a guy with that one.

No. Where are you telling me? He wasn't super low. Like, below, I mean, what if there's a belly button like right above, like the pubes or something? Like it just hung a bit low. Like it was just's a belly button like right above like the pubes or something? Like it just hung a bit like it was just like a belly button like right It was right above his dick It was a big fat guy. It was probably 60 big old gut And I he was in shorts and without a shirt

At bed and it was just smooth all the way around and I thought the only way that could have happened Is if he had some skin removed or something? He could, he could have been so big that like it was hidden underneath the curves. Yeah, that's what I was thinking. It over, you know, but I mean, that would have to be damn low. Or your gut would have had to have formed here and spilled over your original gut. Yeah, I mean, I'm just thinking like here and it, yeah, just like looped up and it's fast-waired. Would you, okay. How big of a deal breaker would this be if you were like, a girl who was great, but she had a really weird

bizarre belly button like freakishly, like what if it was like a foot long? Like, would that be a, could that, like everything else is perfect, but she's got a foot long belly button. What color is it? Is it like gone dark, like it stiff and a bad ball? Oh, I see what you're saying. Or is it the same as it? It's just say it's fleshy, fleshy. Maybe it can be a little darker. I'd be worried about

hurting her. Yeah, it's like getting it caught in my... What if it's, what if, yeah, what if it is a little, what if I bashed it by accident? I don't, yeah, let's just say it is a little sensitive. So it's something you have to be careful of. And she's super sensitive about it. Are you like, like, that was really me. People are sensitive about the way their belly buttons look, right? Like some people are paranoid about it. They think they have a weird looking belly button

and they're embarrassed to show it. I was like, it's just a fucking belly button. I think people with outies might be more sensitive. Because it's like, I feel like outies, they do look at growth. Let's be honest. They look a little weird. Yeah. Could you imagine an out here? I'm like, if you're an ear stuck out, okay. How many other things, if there was an option of interout, how weird that would be? The mouth would be weird. Like an outer. It might be like alien where it comes out.

And that's how you eat, you have to hold food in front of your mouth and the mouth shoots out. Yeah. Well, an out-the-ane is, is pro-lapse. Yeah, and that'd be weird, right? Yeah. I'd, but well, not in 2018, because it's the

A-ness of the world. Well, oh, you're still good. So who is this on chat? If you use the dark blue name on chat, it's hard for me to read your name. Can you set your own color? Yeah. Well, Wolfsara 100 says we should do a poll in your Audi. All right, I heard, let's do it. Wait, wait, wait, is this a, do you have an in your Audi? Do you prefer an in your Audi? Oh, which is it?

I think do you have. Do you have? I think it's do you have, because I think everyone prefers to do it. So I'm gonna, I'm gonna read this while they set that poll up. I wanna mind everyone, this episode of the Receive Podcast is brought to you by Honey.

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Siempre encontrarás una cercana incluso a última hora de la serba tu próximo viaje y de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la serba de la ser Después queujamos en bus esta calatalla. No te lees. Este verano viaja de puerta apuerta y sin complicaciones con Blá Blácar. Siempre encontrarás una cercana, incluso a última hora. Gracias a tu próximo viaje. Ja. Blá Blá Car, Blá Blá Car. All right, hi there. So go to...

Yeah, honey. Works great. Yeah. So go to ristrie.com-slifplay if you want to vote in our poll, any or Audi. And we'll probably pop that up here in just a second whenever they're ready.

I thought they would have it ready by now. Did you see there was that guy, I think it was a student in Germany who developed what they're calling an airbag for mobile phones. It's like a case that you can put on your phone and wanted to detect that it's falling, it shoots a little fins out that cushion it and stop it from hitting the ground. That's stupid. I don't know, is it?

I think it's a great idea. Yeah. Because it doesn't look like any different than a normal case. But if it's a case, you put a case on it. Well, but. You do have to have a case. That's what it looks like when it deploys.

Could you imagine those little curbs? If you have in your pocket, you jump off of a hot, like out of an's what it looks like when it deploys. Could you imagine that if you have in your pocket, you jump off of a like out of an airplane and like, but I mean, a case stops it from breaking. We still run into the risk of like falling like face down. Well, then you just got a shit case. If it doesn't or like there's a rock. Yeah, I mean, I've had I've had phones, I've had phones get messed up, even when when in a case like that it can happen This interesting idea. I don't it's weird that they call it an airbag because there's no bag of air what makes it

I think we need to detect acceleration. Yeah, but like what how is it propelled out? I think it's spring. Yeah, okay No air. No, I know that pull ready No, no air. No, you have that pull ready? No, yes. One second. All right, they're, they're really dropping the ball in there. I feel really bad. I'm sorry for our viewers. Anyone watching the live right now? So am I the only one out here watching the World Cup? Like you said, you watched a little bit in England. You don't care about soccer at all. I still don't care about sports at all. I don't have television. Yeah, it's a little hard. You have to have like cable in order to watch it online,

in order to unlock any streaming services. Yeah, I've been watching. Today was rough. I thought your panel was gonna pull it out against Belgium. I can't think it's like over game, like the last one, because everyone's talking about it. It's talking about the game.

Like the game that ends it all. Okay. The final? Yeah, the final. Yeah, over game. And because everyone keeps talking about it. It's the whole game. Like the game that ends it all. Okay. The final. Yeah, the final. Yeah, the game. And because everyone keeps talking about, oh, the big game or whatever. And I'm like, oh, it's supposed to be the end of the world cup.

And it just keeps going. It just doesn't end. When is it end? Like another week and a half or so, two weeks. Well, I like a five or six week tournament. It's about a month, yeah. Maybe a little, maybe a little more month. Four or five. I'm sure it's six week tournament. It's about a month, yeah. Maybe a little over a month, four or five.

I'm sure it's ridiculous. Well, it's 32 teams do. All the countries that qualified for the world cup. It's long, that's really long. It should be like, the world cup, as long as the Premier League. I guess I think World Cup, I think it's like, that to me seems like it should be the finale. Not a bunch, a whole tournament.

Yeah, I mean, this is it. They've been qualifying for four years to get to this point. You got all these countries competing on where to host it. Oh, yeah, four years. Bam, one game and it's over. That wouldn't be great. I thought it was. How would that be financially? I don't think I thought they always lost money on the stadiums and stuff. It's the Olympics.

Well, in the World Series, how many games are there? The World Series, the World Series is the best of seven, but that doesn't count the turn a lot. It doesn't count the series leading up to it. By the way, apparently, outies are really rare. And I don't know why we're rude. Or people don't want to admit it. They don't want to.

And in an anonymous poll, they're like, I don't want to vote. I was reading that, you know, people in Australia have to, just like us, they have to stream the World Cup in order to watch it. And when the World Cup started, the internet service provider down there, I think, was Optus, couldn't stream the games that people were having trouble with buffering and it just wasn't loading.

So the prime minister of Australia had to tweet that he was talking with the telecom company to fix the buffering and it just wasn't loading. So the prime minister of Australia had to tweet that he was talking with the telecom company to fix the buffering issues so that people could watch the World Cup. It's like, it sounds like a guy in a bar who's like the people in the bar come watch it. A whole country. The pro, like what is going on?

We're like the prime minister has to put out a tweet. His tweet was, I've spoken with the Optic CEO, Alan Liu. He assures me he's giving the World Cup streaming problems. His personal attention, he believes he'll be fixed this evening. Like, he had to go out of his way to have this cover. He had to call up the CEO of the phone company or the broadband company. He'd be like, hey, what's going on? I feel like our country can't watch the world.

I thought the equivalent of him going, hold on, I'm going to reboot it. I'll be right back. I don't feel like anything that a world leader tweets now is that weird. I guess you're right. The standard has been pretty low at this point, of a weird tweet from a world leader. Yeah, sorry to bring everyone down.

Yeah, that's great. No, no, social media's awesome, it rules. Speaking of bringing people down. A couple of weeks ago, we talked about that guy who got onto a plane and he smelled so bad that the flight had to be diverted. Now people were wretching and complaining and they had to like try to separate the guy

into the bathroom to keep the smell away from everyone and they landed and I guess you had to undergo medical attention. I actually finally came out maybe a couple of days ago that like who it was and what had happened. And I think it was like some rock star from Russia. I had been on vacation. I think in the Canary Islands had developed an infection that was causing his flesh to

rot and that on the flight back home, that's when it really started taking hold and rotting his flesh. And... Was he not in pain? He died. Like they took him to the hospital and he died from this infection.

Was he sick? Was he like, hey? He went to, I guess, wherever he was. He went to the hospital there. And they said, oh, it's just a standard infection. You know, just take some antibiotics and you'll be fine. But it turned out to be way worse. That's crazy. So if you think something's wrong,

seek a second opinion. If you find another doctor, be like, listen, I'm not quite sure of the first guy that you would be was talking about. Like, if you're causing planes to land because you stink, then yeah. Yeah, might be something wrong. I'm trying to see my find his name. He was a rock star though, huh? Yes. I'm trying to see

Kind of a rock star death though to stink so bad. No died To rot to have your own flesh rot off the death death pretty metal. Yeah That's right off the death. That's pretty metal. Yeah. Yeah. That's awful. He must have been in pain. I feel like I'm a little russier.

Oh yeah, I'm sure. It hurts. He was Andre Sucilin, 58 year old Russian art rock guitarist. Yeah, he had necrosis, which is a form of cell injury, which results in premature death of cells and living tissue by autolysis. I don't know if I'm probably saying that wrong. Yeah, he stayed intensive care and went various operations, but succumbed to the infection. He passed away in Portugal. I don't know what he was doing in the canary islands.

Right. Maybe like if you're underwater diving, you get cut by something, and then if the water's dirty, it gets a kind of effect. And people want to go to Mars. Well, there's not gonna be, would you risk getting a Martian infection, Chris? A Martian infection? Well, I guess we don't know what those are. Well, there would be none. Yeah.

There's no life on Mars, right? You could confidently say that. No, but I'm not in charge of that. Would you go to Mars? No, never. What if you could go? What are you at? What are our promise you five billion Martian dollars? $Marsh dollars redeemable anywhere on Mars. Which bank is that with the Bank of Mars? Bank of Mars No, but if if they're, we can take you to Mars, we're gonna cry genetically freeze you for five years.

You fly there, you're on Mars for like a couple months, and you come back. I don't even wanna go to Arizona. Well, yeah, but there's no one wants to go to Mars. I don't know who wants to. Well, why would I wanna go to Mars? It's not like there's a rock. Yeah, but if you go to rocks here,

I can go to a place here where I can't see anything except rock. But it's what is the point in a five-year journey to Mars? No one's ever been. It's, it's, we don't know because you've never been. You don't know what you're missing out. Is it five years to get back? Yeah. So it's 10 years, but you won't have age,

but everyone else you know has age 10 years. Oh, I just want to have age. I thought so too. It doesn't take that long, does it? So all I get from this hypothetical is that I'm 40. No, you're not 40. You're still the same age, everyone else is 40. But I've still born in 1980.

Yeah, all right, but yeah, but age wise, okay, you're gonna look great. Okay I was still born in 1918. Yeah, all right. But yeah, but age wise, okay, you'll be, you're going to look great. Okay. So all that's going to happen is, is that I'll be here 10 years from now, and be able to say, I've been to Mars. Yeah. And also you'll be 10 years in the future. So you get to like experience 10 years. Yeah.

But what if I missed out on some wicked stuff? Yeah. But imagine like all the, you, when you come back, you can watch all the good films for the past 10 years and not be disappointed by any of the bad ones. You never had to always excited about that one and it was bad. It's just like, oh no, these were the ones that were good for the past 10 years. Yeah, or in like, and you come back and you, maybe you could take one of them with you. Sure. Oh, just one. Yeah, which one? I take Columbia. Set up a poll, which you can't Yeah, which one? I take Columbus.

Set up a poll, which is how cats sit down and take. No, don't do that. Apparently, the journey from Earth to Mars takes about 300 days. Every two years, Mars is at its closest point. And that's the ideal time to travel between them. Okay, so you could, it would only take two years. Two years. I can't be honest, Chris.

No? How long am I on Mars? Well, as long as you want. An afternoon? I guess. If that's all you want, I mean, I'm on a run. You'd have to be, so you'd have to be there a little over a year. It takes, every two years it comes close enough.

It takes 300 days to get there. So then you have like 14 months there and then you can come back. All right, that doesn't make any sense. No, I, yeah, because if you land at its closest point and leave the same day, it's the closest point. No, because you take off on the closest point and then you get there 300 days later

and it's not at the closest point anymore. So wait, wait, you take off when Earth to when Earth and Mars are the closest point, that's when you leave Earth. I guess you're right. You take off when it would be. You don't have to be there for two years and let, or, or, or, or you get it, you get there and it's still close, but then Earth is going to be moving. It's not ideal. No.

Well, no, but if you timed it, if you timed it, so you arrived right whenever they were closest, you stay for a day or two and then you jump off, it's still gonna be pretty damn close. No, because the window was in the past. No, but you time, you leave preemptively so that. No, you're right. I'm right. I'm right.

I'm totally right. The return journey. You have to wait because then they're moving away from each other at that point. Sure, but you might build, if it takes two years for that window to be perfect, then if you're only there for a day, you could probably leave in the,

it hasn't changed much. No, it has changed. No, I can have a this. I'm leaving the same day anyway, and I'll just take along the journey back there. You think a longer journey back there? Like what's the longest journey that it could be? For this Mars distance.

Uh, the minimum distance from Earth to Mars is 54.6 million kilometers. The furthest apart is 401 million kilometers. Oh, that's the huge difference, dude. The average distance is about 225 million kilometers. Oh. Even that is a huge difference. That's four times longer. That's four years. So it's longer than waiting two years.

It's longer than one. It's like Mars is your spaceship and you're flying. Waiting to get closer and then you get the smaller spaceship. Yes, you couldn't leave the same day. You'd have to wait. Yeah, you could if you just left. Because it wouldn't it wouldn't travel that fast. It wouldn't be that much further in a day.

What? What? Okay, go for it. What? So, okay. Do it with your hands. All right, all right. This, this is Mars going in a circle.

All right, so here's when it's closest to Earth, right? So you're not moving Earth, that's moving too. Oh yeah. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh man, I can't. Yeah, I don't know. There's a reason that it's called rocket science, right?

There's a reason that it's like, that's the thing that smart people do. Yeah, but anyway, I don't wanna spend two years there. I think it'd be really boring. Well, you could also go back into freezing. We need to talk about freezing at all, dude. Where did that come from? No, he's gonna have to get a freeze. We could get it. Oh, yeah. So you're saying I could get there and hang out as long as you want,

spend an afternoon, freeze myself for two years, and then come back. Yeah. A little, a little graphical. Yeah. I, yeah, I feel like if I had the freedom of you can stay there for between one minute and two years awake, I would probably freeze myself later that day. Like, I don't know what I would do overnight. You wouldn't like want to hang out with what? With what? Yeah. You can't.

You're gonna take your cat to Mars to hang out with it there. What do you think of? Have you ever thought about flat earthers? You're gonna take your cat to Mars to hang out with it there. What do you think of, have you ever thought about flat earthers? What do you think about flat earthers? I mean, not much, not very high. All flat earthers, flat masses. They've got to be right. They would have to be otherwise.

They'll fall. That would be hypocritical. What if earth was the only flat planet? It's just a disk. Yeah. All the other planets are spheres. Flat Uranus is. Flat Uranus is. Yeah. We're spelled with the N- No N-

Yeah, we know N- Because it's Uranus. Yeah. I- I- I- I- I have a friend from college who kind of went off to like conspiracy theorists deep in. Yeah.

And is like super into flat earth and crazy conspiracies. And it's kind of like scary to see someone that you know. Like they used to be very best and quickest way that you could explain that it's not flat earth. Like what is that could you tell him to go and do something that would prove it? Well, he I've seen videos of him where he proved that earth was flat because there were rainbows. I don't know what that means, but that was the proof. Because I could just be like, go up a skyscraper and you can see further. Get on a plane.

Does that work? What? Like, if you're, because I feel like if you're on a plane, you don't see enough of the curvature of the earth, either, it's in a skyscraper, you wouldn't see that. I feel like you can kind of see. The horizon is further away, depending on how high you are. Yes. The horizon is further away, depending on how high you are.

Yes, but you can't get high enough to see curvature, can you? But you don't have to be really high. Yeah, like even when you're on a plane, you don't really see curvature. I have never really seen really far, which proves it's not a far Earth. How does that not prove that flat things go really far? But if you can see more when you're higher, that means the stuff you couldn't see was over the hump.

It just means it's how do you view point? What, why is it how do you view point? There's stuff blocking the way. I'm with you, I'm not a flat earth there, but I don't think that they're gonna buy this argument, dude. Yeah. A building that's 50 miles away, you won't see it unless you're of significant height.

Or if the building's really tall. I don't know. By the way, the flat earth society thinks that Mars is round. Okay. Someone just sent me a message that says, it's the flat earth society who's verified on Twitter, by the way, sending a tweet to Elon Musk and the Flight Earth Society says, unlike the Earth, Mars has been observed to be round. Wait, wait, it's the moon. They say round is then, because you can stand on the moon and see the Earth is a spherical spinning object. I think they probably don't believe anyone's ever been to the moon. Oh, that makes sense.

I think they probably don't believe anyone's ever been to the moon. Oh, that makes sense. But why? I don't know. Who decided that that was a? I don't know. I guess there's a whole rabbit hole of like conspiracy theory of flat earth and why and how and I just don't understand it. I should like, I don't know what the logic is of what?

Like, do they think all the continents are on a flat plane? Like we, you know, we know that Australia and what about water? If we're the side of the world. What about water? What about water? If it was flat. You're saying it'd drip off the edge.

Wouldn't it drip off? Unless it's like a funnel, like a channeling. Well gravity holds it on. Don't be stupid Chris. Yeah, but then, but like yeah, and wouldn't there be an end of the world? If it was flat, what would be underneath it? Is it like a coin?

Is it, are there continents on the other side? Oh, is that what it is? I don't know. Or is the whole world laid out in one big plane? That's what I want. So a flat earth is worried about digging. Like they're gonna fall through the space. Yeah, full right through.

Yeah, how thick do they think the flatness is? How thick is flat earth? Right. Google out. Cause it's not really flat. How thick is flat earth? Okay. Okay.

Sorry, this is gonna take me a while. Frequently asked questions. Is this side of joke? It's literally it's number one on the flat Earth Society website. Whatever it's you have, do you have what does Earth look like? I'd explain as a there a magnet of field? Hasn't it blah blah? Okay, so okay, the Earth is a big circle. Okay, so they look at it like the North Pole is in the center. So it's like you're looking down from the top. So the Earth is surrounded on all sides

by an ice wall that holds the ocean's back. This ice wall is what explorers have named Antarctica. Beyond the, I'm sorry, I'm reading this guys. Beyond the ice wall is a topic of great interest to the flat earth society. A bet. To our knowledge, no one has been very far past the ice wall and returned to tell of their journey.

No one's been very far. That's what it looks like to them. There's the ice wall, you see it. There's probably whites and white walkers on the other side of it. How does that make more sense? How is that like, well, that obviously is more logical? What we do know, God, what we do know

is that it encircles the earth and serves to hold in our oceans and helps protect us from whatever lies beyond. Like spherical moths. Like white walkers. Right. So but some people have been slightly beyond the wall. Yes. I think the penguins live all the way around the wall. They really live on the wall. They don't say how deep the earth is. I'm sorry. Okay. They do have an animated gift that explains how day and night works, which is fascinating. Was it the sun spinning around? Yes.

Oh, is it? Oh. Yeah. Yeah. It just seems like someone's been a lot of effort to come up with the reasons to make things stupid. Like, it's working really hard to be very stupid. Do you think it started as a joke? And's almost like, oh shit, like everyone was a

flat earth or at the beginning, right? Right. It wasn't until we gained. I think people had an idea. How is it really no different to a religion? Like you just take it on. Like there's no proof of any God. There's no proof that the earth is flat. That's true. Oh. Well, blah, blah, blah. Okay. So, this is an interview with a flat earther. Okay.

Someone asked, you say the earth is a flat, just run it by ice, all the ice and tartica. How could they ask you about tartica? And this person's answering, and then this is the relevant portion. This is a flat earther answering this question. So what is holding the flat earth up? We can only find out by going through Antarctica by any means necessary. Or maybe if we drill all the way down to all the layers of the earth,

which so far only goes as deep as 12 kilometers. So it's about seven miles, seven or eight miles. That's the farthest anyone's dug. That's as deep as I think they think the earth is How deep is the ocean I think the deepest point of the oceans about 35,000 feet. I could be wrong 35 or 40,000 feet It could be wrong about that but probably somewhere in that same that same range. But so no one's ever flown over Antarctica. Go on. Is that what he's saying? Is that what is according to a flat earth or no one's ever flown? Well, I assume Chris, the

walls too high. The white. I don't know. So it's lava in a volcano. It's the underneath of the Earth, all lava. I don't know, dude. I don't know. Oh, Mary Ann Estrange. 10 kilometers. Hey, this would be an interesting, is to get a flat Earth or on the podcast.

No, we don't have to do that. We can just read the stuff here and laugh and not be sad that someone actually believes that and is trying to argue with us. We don't have to do that. It'd probably be funny for like 20 seconds and then it would just be sad, wouldn't it? Yeah, it would just be like, oh, no, they're getting upset and we're laughing at them. And I don't want to do this anymore.

It's just it's funnier to do. This is the way to get around that. We'll get 10 fly earthers and we'll give them all 20 seconds to prove their point. And then we're not laughing at anyone for too long. We're spreading our laughter even though we're from 10 people. I'm only 10 seconds at a time. Yeah, like I bet if you took all the fly-earthers and gave them only 20 seconds, they would save the bit their most passionate about. The biggest point.

And then the guy would be like, he took my bit. The guy was going to say that. You know, whatever they all have the same thing, the same proof? Then, yeah, then that would suck. All right. How do we even get on Flat Earth? What are we talking about? What if we were to go to Mars? We're talking about Mars and we know what we're talking about.

And that's right. Flat Mars Society. Would you go to Mars if you froze yourself for a couple of years? If I didn't have much else going on, yeah. You just got too much going on right now. I mean, I might do it now. I'm trying to think if I had like a family, then probably not, you know, unless like I just wanted to skip part of my kids.

What are you taking with you? Because you're gonna have to have a cat. Right, I don't know. What are you taking with you? I don't have a cat. You gotta take a cat. What kind of answer is that, dude? He have a cat. Right. I don't know. What are you taking with you? I don't have a cat. You're gonna take a cat. What kind of answer is that, dude? He took a cat.

I mean, there's nothing growing that. What are you taking with you? Well, I don't have a gun. What? Are you gonna bring food? I mean, I assume it's all arranged by NASA. Like, they're- They're-

Yeah, well, I mean, I'm not like doing it by myself. I'm not doing, I'm not like a self-made rocket to Mars. Okay. So, I mean, as far as what doing it by myself. I'm not doing, I'm not like a self-made rocket to Mars. Okay. So, I mean, as far as what I wanna take with me, I mean, I guess I would take like a, I would like someone to go with me. I guess a girl. I'm not divided by myself.

Oh my God. What? So, I mean, because I, if I had to pick one person to go with me, I would probably pick a girl so that you know, I love that you keep saying girls that have woman. You don't mean them. No, I don't a female. But your, your sentencing, this woman, to two years of a mom. No, no, I wouldn't sentence. I'd be like, hey, who wants to go to Mars with me?

Who wants to say yes? I don't know if someone else who wanted to go to Mars. Let's get a poll going. Which you got to Mars with. Yeah, would you, do you want to be a woman? I assume you're talking to a woman because you want to have sex with her. I mean, if I'm going to do this, you would take. I thought you would crazy. I assume you're talking to a woman because you wanna have sex with her. I mean, if I'm doing this, I thought I'd do it two years.

Any human. I mean, I would take anyone. I'm not gonna say I'm only gonna take a woman. I'd deal you a woman in the bank on Mars. Sure. You're gonna bring like some bedding. You should, you should. I'm gonna,

that should be like a, I'm almost a Tinder profile. Wanna go to Mars with me? I'm serious. What if you didn't get on? I mean, I think I would like talk beforehand. I don't think I'd be like a blind... I don't think it'd be like a tender match to...

I'll meet you on the launch pad at 6am. Bring us to case. Wow! What is it? No. that's 6am, bring us to case. Wow. Oh, what is it? No, no, no. Well, you got a good number there. I'm just curious also, how many? Rootfeed.com slash play.

Here's what's gonna happen to the demographics of this pool, are you? Often. After three months on Mars, I'm envisioning you and this woman living like several kilometers apart in your own settlements because you got pissed off at each other because you're only on Mars and you've only got you for entertainment, not you, I mean each other. Yeah, yeah.

I mean, that's going to be tough with any sort of like, you know, on an island type thing, but you know, I'd rather be with someone else than just a cat. That's fair. You know, I just, I wouldn't else than just a cat. That's fair. You know? I just, I wouldn't feel bad for the cat. Yeah, like I would feel bad for a pretty human with this spend that much time.

I wasn't like, this isn't like signing it. They would volunteer, someone who's willing to do it. They'd be one of the 44%. That's honestly, that's higher than I expected. Yeah. You got, you got a good pickup rate. I don't think they're taking this poll seriously. We're gonna pick one of you. We're going to go to Mars with Chris. We're going to crowdfunded. For example, would you guys have a Mars with Chris? No. Neither would I.

Well, you weren't invited. Is anyone in this room who got to Mars with Chris? Bullshit. It's not just about me. It's also people who want to go to Mars. You just have to go with me. Ha ha ha. It's honestly, it's a really close poll. I didn't expect it to be that close. Where are you doing your twos?

My twos. You know, number two Z's. What are you, where are you shitting on Mars Chris? Oh, oh, oh. I mean, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I on moss? Oh, oh, oh, I mean I I think that worked out. Yeah, yeah, and that's this guy they got like little bags and stuff for that You know you shitting bags. It's a nice nothing. Okay. Have like suction cup toilets that You know you've seen the Martian right yeah, yeah So you you you're lined with a ship. Yeah, you're in a little hub thing just like the Martian Okay, yeah Here let me read this thing You're in a little hub saying just like the Martian. Okay. Yeah.

Um, here, let me read this thing. You can, we can end that. That was close. It was close. There's 48 to 52%. 48% said they would have gone with you. Thank you. But I'm going to read this to, uh, to everyone.

No, I want to remind everyone this episode of the RESTEEF podcast is also brought to you by Ring. Ring's mission is to make neighborhoods safer. You might already know about their smart video doorbells and cameras that protect millions of people everywhere. Ring helps you stay connected to your home anywhere in the world. So there's a package delivery or a surprise visitor, you'll get an alert and be able to see here and speak to them all from your phone. That's thanks to the HD video and two way audio feature on Ring devices. I've got one at home. It was super easy to install and you get an alert whenever

it detects someone. I got the flood light one so lights come on. It was super easy to install and you get an alert whenever it detects someone. I got the flood light one. So lights come on. It's awesome. As a viewer and listener, you have a special offer on a Ring Start Kit. Okay, I read that wrong. I'm start over. As a viewer and listener, you have a special offer on a Ring Start Kit available right now

with a video doorbell and motion activated flood light camp. Oh, that's the thing I got the flood light camp. The starter kit has everything you need to start building a ring of security around your home. Just go to ring.com slash teeth. That's ring.com slash teeth Thank you ring for sponsoring this episode of the Ristis podcast go ring How long do you think until Alexa is Robot like a physical thing that can be...

A physical human who does things in your house. Like a physical device, not a physical human. Yes, a physical device that looks like a human. I don't know, some of that Boston dynamic stuff is pretty crazy looking. I figure if you could integrate Alexa with that. Does it only need one? Yeah, you know?

Cause the thing is I feel like with movies, whenever you see a futuristic sci-fi movie, they get a new robot and it's like, it's got a new voice and everything. But I feel like that technology never comes from anywhere in the movie. It's always like, it's an entirely brand new thing that no one's ever dealt with. But it's not, it's never going to be like that for us. It's going to be like, the suck, Yeah, like we've already got several Alexa-enabled devices in terms of like different form factors.

And eventually that's gonna be in something that moves around. And eventually it'll become what we saw in science fiction films. Yeah. But I think it'll be a slow like... Slow-climb. Yeah.

I saw a video of... I don't know if we talked about this in the podcast or if I was talking about this just with someone after a podcast, but I was watching video the other day a couple weeks ago of a parrot who could Who understood and could communicate with that device? So it could talk to the device and turn lights on and off or like turn music on and could like manipulate its environment like things that a bird couldn't normally do. It was able to do because of this integration now. or like turn music on and could like manipulate its environment. Like things that a bird couldn't normally do, it was able to do because of this integration now. Could it order bird seed? I guess it probably could.

If we could figure out the correct thing to say, you could teach it to order food, but then it would just order food. If it's hungry, it orders food. It doesn't think that the food's readily available, you know? Well, I'm sure there are pet feeders that voice activated. Oh yeah, it's an interesting idea.

So it can have to be amazing. That would be amazing. So your dog could feed itself. Oh, yeah. It's an interesting idea. So it can be amazing. That would be amazing. Like your dog could feed itself. Oh, yeah. That'd be cool, if something happened to you, your dog was smart enough to dispense new food and order replacement. Here's the question.

Do you think that at some point, dog stopped caring about us because they would realize they didn't need us because they could order their own food on Amazon? Yeah. Once, once robot, and AI are the superior beings that take care of them. Yeah, I think if you could call a dog to sort of fingerprint scan its paw and that ordered food, it would never need a human.

I saw someone setting up Touch ID with like an animal paw, like you're talking about. Did it what? Yeah, I figured it was like a hedgehog or something. They were using like this, it's a little paw as a sensor on touch ID, yeah. It's like the most secure way to use your phone. It isn't any of your fingers. So you gotta find your pet.

You're like, I'm here, I'm locked my phone for me. I don't even get to teach you like an animal to like high-five it right on the sensor. That's really funny. Then the idea that like that hedgehog access to the most important documents and the hedge hog becomes like this, that's a good movie. That'd be funny if that was the red button that launched the nukes. It had to be an animal.

Where's nibbles? I've heard, they don't do this, but there were, you know, when, like nuclear launch codes were being developed and they were figuring out, like, how do people who need to launch these weapons, like, how, how do they carry the codes? What's the procedure for this thing? And then they always talk about, like, there's a football, right? Like, it's like a briefcase that has all the shit in it that they need to launch. There were people who said that the launch codes should be surgically implanted into a human. And that if someone wants to launch a nuke, they need to kill that person in order to get

the codes out. Who is that? That way it's like, you know, you know, the real world implications. Like, if you're going to launch a nuke, you're going to kill millions, you know, thousands of people probably say the person who wants the code has to literally kill one person in order to get the code in order to input it. Who's going to volunteer to be that guy? It's a pretty quick job, right?

Until we need to- We never had to do it before. You never needed the code before. Yeah. It's like you really gotta be sure you want to launch that weapon because you need to murder someone. You need to actually sit there, look someone in the face and kill them. What if the guy with the thing in him wants to send the nukes?

He doesn't have that. He can't do it. Yeah. All right, what if it's just, so you just, would you, all right, would you, would you do that? Would you be the guy, you had nothing, you have to do nothing else to rest your life. You can't care of your whole life. Yeah. You live in the White House.

Your whole life doesn't matter. The current White House. Doesn't matter who, who the president is, you have to live in the White House, your whole life doesn't matter. The current White House? Doesn't matter who the president is, you have to live in the White House. And what's my salary for this? Because it's my life good at any point. It's good. Well, as a kid, not all times, but.

How much does the president make? We'll say you make, what, the president's salary? I'm like, quarter mill. President's salary. $400,000 a year. That's not bad. With the $50,000 annual expense account, $100,000 non-taxable travel account,

you wouldn't really get that, because you'd have travel with the president. $19,000 for entertainment. What does that mean? Map does? Who knows? 19 grand on end time. So it's to say roughly $450,000 a year that you're getting, you're getting comped.

All you got to do is you just have to have a little surgery to put a nuclear code in you in a place where it's gonna be fatal if they pull it out. I don't think I would do it. But you could see, we'll leave your whole life making $430,000 a year. Okay, and now it'll only go up. I think this set the last increase was like in 2004.

Okay, so if I lived to 80, how much have I made? We'll say 50 years times $450,000, $22.5 million. So it's $22.5 million, but I have a nuclear code in you. Wait, but here's the thing to think about. If nukes are being launched, you might die anyway from nuclear attack. Well, we launched them on ourselves. No, but like, assuming, assuming we're looking for retaliation.

There's gonna be retaliation. So it's like, if it gets to the point where you're getting murdered, you might die, you know, it might, what if I wanted to live the rest of my life as a ghoul and now I can't? So what? Fall out ghoul. Oh, oh't. So what? Fallout ghoul. Oh, oh, she never played Fallout.

No. Well, I guess, I don't know, then you're out. That's good buttons, isn't it? It's good buttons. Because most of the time, so you- And you don't have to work, like, your job is just to be around. Not even in the same room necessarily.

That sounds really boring. You can do whatever you want though. You got that, boy, but I have to be near the code launcher. I can't be on holiday and maricious if the president needs to watch. Loads nukes. Oh, that's making it worse. Yeah, I can only go where he goes.

What if there's two guys? And you're one of two, so you guys swapping it out. So whenever one, you only get 225,000. Yeah, you get the whole, because you're still 50, you're doing it two so you you guys swapping it out so whenever you have to only get 225 They're still 50% you have to work. Yeah, but There's two guys you take turns so whenever you're sleeping the other guys hanging out with the president I think this scenario doesn't look I think it should be worse than that. I think the surgical implant should be in a child Well, but that didn't get- The child's gonna grow up. Cause they take it out, put it in a different kid.

But you can't take it out. That just beats the whole purpose. If you could take it out without killing them, then the whole purpose is moot. A dog. What if it was not hiding? All right, well, it was just someone's, you had to cut someone's handoffers or armoffers.

No, no, no, the stakes are not high enough. All right, you're right. You're gonna kill kids with the nuke. You should have to kill a child. Right, but I'm saying that they're gonna have to code forever. Okay, the code expires every five years and generates a new code in a new child. I don't know.

Oh, yeah. Well then who's going to, who, how are these kids, like, who picks out these kids to get nukes? These kids are going to be rich, Chris. Peter Hayes is asking who said a dog who did it. I'm not going to help you. I mean, that's killed dogs every day. What did they do? No, I think I would probably do it. You would do it.

Yeah, that's good money. So you'd live in Washington, DC. Yeah. Live in the White House. It'd be a lot easier if you could do what you said and just try to swap out with someone. I would be more inclined to do it then. Yeah, that's because that is easily, yeah. Even if there's a new,

you have a 50, 50 chance of not being there. I assume you'd always have like a security detail, like they want, we don't want to make sure you never get kidnapped. All right, what if all that does is it gives you the freedom to travel around, but when you get back, you have to die as well. Oh, you're saying, if the other guy got killed

for the nukes, they have to kill you. They kill you both. Yeah, in your own time, though. Yeah. That's okay, that's fair. And that's the same thing. It's just being one person, but at least you get to travel. Yeah.

You can enjoy your half a million dollars a year. To me, what ruins the millions of dollars is the constant fear of the any moment, even if you're being really safe and a nice, safe mansion that you could be called to your execution. Yeah, but I mean, you'd be living in fear of a nuclear war anyway. Like, do you live in that fear? Like, it's the same thing. You're in fear of a nuclear launch. Yeah. It's not any more likely to happen if you have the code in you.

You're just definitely going to die if it happens. As opposed to possibly dying. Yeah, I guess my mindset is stuck on like it's going to happen at some point. Right. But it's not. You could conceive of we've gone a long time without that happening. That we know of Allegedly we don't we'll never find out what happened to those side of the earth. Here's the death of execution

Say shoot you in the head, okay It's not ideal. If they're like sorry, Gav. It's time. Would you argue with them? Would you be like no? No? No? I think we can work this out with diplomat like Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they'll be like, if you don't die, we all die. But, well, let's not rush the conclusions. I don't like this. I wouldn't do it.

All right. I feel like we just had a million dollars about scenario. Well, let me add on to it then, because I came up with a good one too. Okay. I know that they won't let me film million dollars but your feces is invisible. Is that bad? How do you know when you're done wiping?

I'm not seeing a problem here. I would do it. Yeah. I would do it. Yeah. You could just... Here's a question. Has it always been invisible or is it suddenly invisible? Suddenly. It has, yours has always been invisible. Okay. I can't change your path for the scenario. All right, we'll just make sure, because now you have the knowledge. Don't be ridiculous, Chris.

It starts from the moment you agree. You have the knowledge of generally how many wipes based off like, pass, poop. Right, but the first thing you suddenly tap brings up a great point. Okay. That's what a bidet is for. I would do that. That one is for.

Yeah, then it's easy. Then you know, that's like easy mode. You get a million bucks by a bidet. You're done. You're set. All right, but what if you do a bad font and you don't know whether you've shit yourself? Who's this sound?

Sam K says I would do it in a heartbeat. You could shit anywhere. You could shit anywhere but people still smell it and slip in it and stuff. Yeah, I mean that's almost better. Now yeah, we're getting a lot of people in chat saying yes. Because they really? Because you're almost overwhelmingly. You didn't you have this invisible poop that you could throw at people.

Well, why would you want that. Why would you want that? Why would you want that? I don't think invisible feed people would buy that. That'd be the, that's a really good like prank potential there. To throw invisible poop at someone. They would still feel it, hit them. Yeah, and they'd be like, what is this? What's going on?

It's like when you walk into a spider web and you're like, where is it? What's going on? What is it? And then they'd rub it in, they'd be like, oh my god, what is? Yeah. I walked into a spider web yesterday,

and I started freaking out, and I had to take my shirt off. I was walking around outside, and I walked into it off, and I found the spider on me, and I brushed it off of the shirt. Did your pasty, buddy, burn instantly? Did it? So fucking brutally hot. All right, I feel like seeing poo is very important No, your own hygiene

No, and there's not everywhere has a day Sure, but need to get one at home your home base. So you do most of your pooping right? What if you poo in a plane or an airport? Well, then you then you'll just have to be a really aggressive with your wipe Yeah, you can't be too aggressive Well sure, but it's not you just you just got you plant you're a millionaire you'll just have to be really aggressive with your wipe. Yeah. You got me too aggressive? Well, sure, but it's not, you just got, you're a millionaire. You're playing ahead.

Vice investor, hella paper, you're fine. Man, the other day I was, who I forgot someone sent it to me on Twitter, but apparently Vice did a documentary about, or they're doing a documentary series about American conventions. And the first episode I saw was when they went to the Abraham Lincoln presenters,

like I did for for unconventional. It would have been funny if you both there at the same time. You think the people at that event now are like, God damn it, is this gonna happen every year now? Cause I was there last year, Vice was there this year. So every year someone's gonna go to their event. Would you have a go again? Maybe? I don't know man, that was weird. That was there this year. So every year someone's gonna go to their event. Would you have a go again?

Maybe? I don't know man, that was weird. That was a weird event. Maybe I would. I feel like they would know me now. And I know how to approach it as opposed to just being like the weirdo outsider who. It's gonna be a weirdo outside every year though. Who stopped in?

Yeah. I love the idea of you being a regular. A regular aid. Regular. I would grow. If I think if I went back I would definitely grow the facial hair Instead of wearing the fake beard we'd have to start now Yeah No, I'm not going next year. Okay, that settles that But yeah, I was I saw it and I was like mother fuckers. That's my thing

If you a first member and you haven't seen unconventional, you should watch it. It was an interesting experiment. Oh, there I am. You'll be it. I think my hat is also ridiculously huge compared to everyone else. They knew you were just a casual. Yeah. I like that. That was part of your life.

That's at the Kentucky State Capitol. Yeah, it was an experience. And you can watch that experience on RoosterT's.com. Oh, man, and speaking of content, I saw, did you see that Halo finally has their TV show in active development? They have like someone picked it up. They, I feel like they announced at E3 like four or five years ago, they were gonna work with Spielberg to bring Halo to television.

And then- I honestly, I thought that was just wasn't happening. Yeah, this like, then there was nothing. We're absolutely zero about it. And now I think Showtime ordered a 10 episode series. Is it gonna be about Master Chief? I don't know. I think they were really light on each of those.

In the universe. You see Halo, TV, Showtime. And I just wanna put it out there. I'm available. But, mosque. For whatever you need, I'm, have your people call my people. I'm available to you, by the way.

You're available to? I am. If I'm not on Mars. Ha ha ha. Just a general new TV show. That was our 10 episode first season for Halo, which is expected to begin production early 2019.

What did you think of plot details are thin with the press really simply stating that the show will be dramatizing an epic 26th century conflict between humanity and an alien threat known as the Covenant? I feel like it's going to look really good. It's going to be visually really good and 4K and HDR and sick. Did you watch Fordrins Dawn? Yes. Do you like it?

Forrins Dawn, which one was that? Is that the one with like the boot camp thing? Were they like a training? Yeah. Yeah, that is it, right? Yeah, yeah, I liked it. It was good. Yeah, I would watch it.

Yeah. Are you excited about Halo Infinite? I think that was just an engine. I don't think that's a game. It's not a game. I think it was just an engine demo. A game won't be called that. I don't know.

It's so weird. Again, they released the stuff with very little information. I think it was just to showcase the slip space engine. I think it's what they called it. Yeah. But I don't know what that meant. Well, I think it'll just to showcase the slip space engine. I think it's what they called it. Yeah, but I don't know what that meant. Well, I think it will be a game. I feel it seems weird to do all that

and then not have anything to do with it. Well, I assume if that is an engine, it will be a game using that. Yeah, that's what I meant. Like they're not gonna like, well, I don't know, what do I have to do? I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. what do I have in the world? I don't know. Yeah, I don't know.

It was weird. I thought for sure, because at E3, when they showed that trailer and they showed case, the Halo Infinite and all that, the Xbox stage had tons of Xboxes on it. I thought they were gonna say, it was an MMO and they were gonna have tons of people come out and play it, but no one ever came out.

No one used all those Xboxes on stage. I remember seeing that too, and because I was watching with Blaine and we were like, oh, yeah, they're going to do some big like Battle Royale or M, you know, MMO and then yet. Yeah, I think they only used all those Xboxes once. I think it was like for Forza Horizon. They had a few people come out and like race. And that was it. It seemed like there were tons of Xboxes and something got cut. I feel like so much time has passed since I've played a Halo game. I'm going to Halo 5 come at Halo 5 release. Like 20 people are saying in chat that it was it will be actually the next mainline game Halo Infinite.

October 2015. Yeah, so we're coming up on three years. Three years. It just feels like longer. What was the longest gap between Halo games? We might be in it right now. 2001, 2004. Was that right?

One and two. I think you're right. Because we started RVB in 03. Yeah, and then two came out in 04. Oh, so maybe between two and three was the longest gap. Because that was September 20, 2007. Oh, no, not quite three years. So Halo, three years. So Halo three Halo reach.

It's good on the list September 2010. So three years. Yeah. Halo four 2012 2012. Two years. Then five. 15 three years. So we're coming up.

I'm like, Jonesing for a. We're coming up now on having the longscap. Yeah. After like October of this year. Well though, ODST was pretty soon after I looked for you, wasn't it? Yeah, but you really considered that like a mainline game.

What's the same story? Like in the timeline. Well, Master Chief was not the protagonist. That's true. And like it didn't have a number. It was like they made it a point. Even though I guess infinite doesn't have a number. Oh, I was really, really three ODST. it didn't have a number. It was like they made it a point. Even though I guess infinite doesn't have a number. Oh, I was really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really least favorite Halo game.

Maybe four? I'll say four. What about you? Five. Five. I like four because it was a return to the Halo one vibe of it. It's just lonely, master chief and Cortana run about. Thoughts I haven't played more. So I don played more so. I don't I can't say I have a least favorite or favorite. For shame, Chris.

I know. Man, we before the this episode of the podcast started, we were listening to music on the pre show, you know, they played music and we were having an argument over when what voting episode of RVB, the song came from and when we recorded it. Yeah, because you said, oh, there's the the RVB like voting PSA. Yeah. Yeah. You said it was we. I thought it was two years ago. It's like, no, no, that was in six three six, back in the old office. It was six years ago. Yeah. It turns out. So that means Haylor Ful wasn't out. I guess not.

It turns out. So many tailored for wasn't out. I guess not. It's just weird how time. Yeah, you can lose that much time. Something I thought was two years ago was actually six years ago. So that's a big difference. I sure would know when it was. I just remember the environment and which it was made in, you know, like the office.

Yeah. Otherwise, I'd be like, I have no idea. I could tell you what year it was. I just knew it was at 636. Yeah, that's how my memories work too. It's just like, what were my surroundings at that time? Yeah. I was looking at my achievements in Master Chief collection. And I've got something like 550 achievements of, I think 600.

Geez. So I'm left with the real bastard ones, like, do the lasso playlists and stuff. Which, when you look at the stats, it's like 0.03% of gamers have them. I, but I want to try. You know, how many people would, what's the rarest one? Like, what's the smallest percentage you remember? I think the rarest ones were the ones where it's like beat the legendary campaign in under three hours. Like the proper extreme speed runners achievements.

But Lacer is like, you can take your time. And I've gotten up to Truth and Reconciliation in Halo 1 on Lacer, which is a... All skulls. When I was last a sample, legendary all skulls. When I was last year's sample, legendary all skulls on. And it's a real bastard, like in Halo 1, if either player dies, you go back to checkpoint, your shields don't regenerate, you have to punch, you have to melee enemies to get your shield back. Really just difficult scenario. But we just, Dan and I couldn't get past the third level. But I just need to find somebody who's better than Dan.

I think that helped me through it. When I was a kid, I was a completionist with games. Like, I would do everything, find every, like, item, every side quest, and try to get, like, every character, like, max level and stuff. And that was when I had... But that was whenever I didn't have anything else to do in my life. You know, when I was like, this is all I had. And I was like, yeah, I'm gonna... That was probably my most disappointing realization about growing up is that you're used to playing a certain amount of video games

because you have so much free time. And then you're excited. When you get older, like, oh, new or better looking video games coming out. And you just don't have time to play them. Yeah. And it's tragic. And it's like, I will... Sometimes I'll almost be a game.

And it's like, yeah, I'll come back for these achievements and I'll clear up and I know in my heart, I will never play the game again. But I'm like, oh yeah, I wonder. That's why whenever I play a game now, I don't even care about completing stuff. I'm like, I'm just, and I don't bother looking stuff up about it or like trying to like, oh,

make sure I get the best item. I'm just like, I'm just gonna play and have as much, like, do whatever I want because I know, I'm never gonna finish everything in the game anyway. So it doesn't matter if I collect everything or whatever. And to me now, achievements are actually depressing in that, so I have periods like my Steve Collection

did a ton of achievements and then I went back for more. And I was like, okay, I'm gonna get, I'm gonna try and clear some of these up. Stop playing again. Just this weekend I was like, I should continue clearing up. I looked at the last achievement I'd got, it was 2016. Like even after my clear up phase, I just popped it down in two years of past.

And it's like, what have I done between these achievements? Like all the stuff that's happened. And I know I'm probably gonna put it down and pick it up again in like two years. At this time, it's going so far. It'll be done in 25 years, I get through all of them. Yeah, only 49 left or something. What are you doing?

I'm sorry, I'm playing with the put it away. What's the last birthday party you went to? Last birthday party I went to. But do you hang out like kids birthday parties or anything? Not kids. It was some, I don't know, maybe a couple of weeks ago. It's just like a happy hour type birthday party thing. It wasn't like a big like, banana. Mm-hmm.

But. I was gonna say that I hadn't been to one year, so remember we, I just went to your stupid one. You're at one right now. That was all right, what? It was all right. A little chill meal. You're one right now.

Yeah. Oh, I actually have a question for you, Gus, because do you have, do you deal with an HOA where you live? I have dealt with HOAs in the past. And what does your experience been with them? I want to be very careful about what I say. It's been okay.

It's been okay. Have you had a problem? Not well, I just feel like they're kind of like overly Okay, oh you know what I would love You should become the president of your H.O.A. I Chris that's the documentary you should do that you should absolutely do that they asked at one point I Got contacted about running for H.O.A. Office. You should do it Chris I just I'll I'll help fund your campaign. Oh I got contacted about running for HOA office. You should do it.

Chris, I'll help fund your campaign. Oh, I'll give you a campaign donation. The company should fund it. I wanna see you do this. All right, I accept your nomination. I can't nominate you. Dude, I don't live there. I give you my support.

You should absolutely do this. Well, because we could just buy the votes. What do you think running an a way entails, Chris? Hey, I mean, it's a lot of budgeting and apparently bitching about like potted plants in the walkways. I just know it's like, like one thing that comes to mind is like,

I had some friends over and my friend had a dog and he was like, we brought the dog into the pool, like not into the pool, into the gated area that the pool was in, because it was had a dog and he was like, we brought the dog into the pool, like not into the pool into the Pool gated area that the pool is in because it was like a dog. And then someone came out and like, Hey, the science says no dogs in the pool area. And we're like, Oh, okay. So then my friend took the dog up to my place. And that was it. Not not an event, right? It was just like, okay, yeah, we'll put the dog away. I didn't realize you couldn't come into this little gated area.

And then the next day, I had a neighbor, like an old lady, she was like, hey, so, you know, I heard you had a dog at the pool. Oh my God. And I was like, yeah, yeah, you know, and we put it away. I'm like, all right, yeah, it's on the rules. And then, and I was like, you know, and we put it away like all right. Yeah, it's it's it's on the rules And then and I was like and then like the next day another

Neighbor it's like hey, how are you doing good morning? Heard about the dog. Oh my god. It wasn't non-event It was like a dog just like oh, hey, the dog can't be in there. Okay, cool We'll go put it the dog away. But it was like circulating. I'm, who's the one telling all this, all the story? I don't know. I'm, why didn't you find out about it? Because I'm not the president.

But yeah, yeah, spread everyone. But I get, it's just like, they were just talking to each other. I think they're just all like, they talked to each other. I don't really, I'm not like in the, the scene. Oh, you can run as an outsider. That's really hot right now. Yeah, a little drain the swamp. Yeah, you don't know anything about each of ways. You're going to change the system. Yeah.

People are loving this idea and chat, by the way, they all say they want an archy doc. Yeah, we'll just call it Christopher. President Christopher. What would you, what would you got to keep the H.O.A. launch codes in you? What would your post this be? Would you change it? One, I think you should be able to keep potted plants. In the walkway. So they were your potted plants? Well, yeah, you're the problem, Nathan. No, no, he's what happened.

I saw other people with little potted plants on the walkway. You're just trying to make it nice. And then I was like, oh, I should get some potted plants and have some cilantro growing. Got to, bought a little pot, put it on the, put it up by my window. And then I got an email three days later to like, you got to remove your potted plant. It's a fire hazard.

And then I was like, and then I emailed back, I was like, but there are other people with potted plants and like those have been removed. I thought I would, I think I was the, I was like, but there are other people with potted plants and like, those have been removed. I thought I think I was the hair that broke the camel's back. Or the straw. Straw, whatever. You know, I need a lot. Yeah.

Either way, it's a small little weight that brought. I want a book of sayings that you've written. The hair that broke the camel's back, they're all, they're 90% of the way there. They close. The same intention, just a little off. Yeah. Yeah.

It's always a, can be a pain. Yeah. They're not, they're not always ideal. But you gotta have sometimes we're like, to stop assholes who would obviously like do things that are super fucked up. But minor things like that, you should be able to look the other way. Yeah, or it was just like, it didn't need to be like a point, it didn't need to be a gossip thing,

where it's like the dog. So this walkway, other people have to use. It's like, yeah, it's like a walkway stairs, right? You know, you walk balcony, right? A balcony walkway, right? And it's like a little plant by the window. It's not blocking the walk, it's not blocking the walkway,'s not blocking the the walkway,

because it's a wide walkway. What would be your platform? Like what would be your like campaign slogan? I would say dogs, the pool. Oh, do you think people are clamoring for dogs by the pool? Like like I'm just looking out. Is this really the best? Okay, here's here's how I would run.

I would run. We already invested in this. I would run is like, let's, let's, it's bring, make us young. Let's, it's bring, make us young. Let's get that on a shirt. No, because I feel like there are a lot of like, the people who are running the HOA are a bunch of old like

But that the people gonna be voting though. Yeah, yeah, but I'm like new blood But you got to appeal to the the everyone Yeah, but people I'll be like listen you guys are out of touch with the times. They're not gonna vote for you if you say that Your old thoughts no, but I'm gonna be like, listen, let me help everyone. Like we're all gonna, like you guys don't, there you go, let me help everyone. Let me help everyone.

Let me help everyone. I'm not ready to make campaign promises just yet. I just, you're like, I'm running. I'm just running. Dogs by the pool. And you want people tripping over, put your plants when they're running from fires.

And firemen are like tripping over cilantro plants. Slush is delicious. That's gonna be another point. Slush is delicious. Or a community place to put plants, a community garden. Community garden. There you go. They probably have that.

I don't, not that I know of. Community garden. And then I would also say, less people need to calm down about noise complaints. Less, less people need to calm down about noise complaints. All right. We need to calm down about noise complaints. And you're just no one's gonna vote for any of this.

So you want people to be loud. You want a loud place to live with docs pissing and shitting by the pool with free cilantro in the walkways. You know when you get out of the pool and you're covered in dog hair, I'm not saying dogs in the pool. Dogs are not allowed in the pool. Dogs like shake in the hair comes out. Yeah.

Yeah, it's sort of leaves. It leaves shaking in the hair from down. No, I'm saying leaves fall off the tree into the pool. You got a pool with a tree over it? There's trees, yeah, yeah. It's not like it's like covered in tree, but I'm just saying, a dog should be able to enjoy the pool side.

Why if it takes a dump? Then you clean it up. It's the same as still poop. They on a wet floor. It's still cleaning up poop. You still got to clean up your poop with any dog. It's just now it's like, it's a good place to keep a dog. The pool?

It's getting one. It's, it lets the dog run around. You can enjoy the pool. You got to install one of those like things that holds like the dog bags and like, she'll like crash down. Yeah, yeah. You got to have someone come and clean up the crash down.

Yeah, and then I, and free and and free snacks What kind of snacks dog treats dog treats and and cilantro and Fresh from the pot actually and I would also petition to have more more trees that are fruits more trees More fruit trees More fruit trees. More fruit trees. What's your favorite fruit? What kind of fruit would you plant?

Cherry trees are delicious. The cherries grow here? I don't know. I'm just throwing this out there. Any sort of, because I'm not about to lay a cherry tree by the pool. Not by the pool. This is elsewhere.

Oh, okay. And then you can buy the community garden. Yeah, it's gonna bring in tons of birds. They're gonna be shitting all over underneath the tree because of the cherry. Like you can go and get fresh cherries in the time you want. Cherry trees are really tall.

Are they? Or blue? Or a blueberry bush, or a blueberry. I'm just saying cherry tree doesn't piss about. I think you need a lot of them. My thing is plants are practical. Like let's make them generate food. So you want, I want farming.

Cherry trees are big, wow. Yeah. Or like maybe fresh chickens. Fresh chicken. Like as in, what if there was a community chicken coop and and and there were you could go get eggs. So fresh eggs fresh eggs. You can't go and slow or a chicken for that. No, no, no, no. Maybe once a week, like you can slaughter one of the chickens. Have you have like a little barbecue by the pool?, like, you can slaughter one of the chickens. Have you have like a little barbecue by the pool? Sure.

And you can eat one of the chickens. Whenever the chickens have babies, you could then eat those. I'm imagining it's a baby pool. Or like, no, you eat the old ones. Someone's a pool cooking a freshly killed chicken and nine dogs, almost sniffing at the barbecue. And you could make an awesome side of the cherries in cilantro to go with the good salsa

Cherry cilantro. Why is that coriander? What is that? Yeah, yeah, yeah, this is a two my favorite things cherry's in cilantro Yeah, I'm all about this idea I like the touchy idea of his values. No, he's running for H.O.A. President Yeah, I would totally I would sweep You would sweep. You would sweep the floor after you failed to get anyone's vote. I would definitely have to like butter up the, you know, my constituents. Yeah. I think I think we should fund this.

I think we should. All right. I really, I really like this idea. I don't know if the last time I wanted something this badly, I really want this to happen. Right. I'm going to make it. Right. President Christopher.

No one's ever said that before. We get used to it. Do you have like a lot of offices? Is there also like a secretary, a treasurer? There's other offices. You would have to do work for that, you know. Oh, I know. Do they get paid?

I doubt it. I don't think so. You must take some budget for some expenses here and there. Yeah, yeah. Maybe, maybe. And you get power. Event payment budget. In the 19th, you have to have the code in place.

All right. Well, I think it's a good idea. I, we should pitch this to the documentary team. Yeah. But they're missing out. This is gold. Good. You should make the announcement about the time change

next week and probably. I should. I was going to do it one more time. We'll wrap it up here in a minute by doing a mind everyone. If you watch the live stream next week, normally we start at 5 p.m. next week. We'll be starting at 7.30 p.m. because we're doing a live event downtown Austin.

Hopefully you got a ticket. I think those are all sold out. Yeah, they are sold out. We confirmed that earlier. And so we'll be starting live at 7.30 next Monday, which is two and a half hours later than normal if you're in a different time zone. And you'd help figuring it out.

All right, we got to go. We got to go help Chris, organize this campaign. We have a lot of work ahead of us. We're going to be doing some crowdfunding in order to get this done. Thanks for watching, everybody. Happy Birthday, blobs. Do you like apples? All right, example. Together in Trempit hosts,

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