rSlash - r/AITA My Dad Hates Me

Episode Date: December 28, 2023

0:00 Intro 0:06 Honesty 4:22 Dog name 6:43 Top comment 7:15 Fat shaming 9:40 Room door 12:35 Apology Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Yes, that's gotta be the wings. Wings, nice! Where'd you order wings from? Louisiana! Enjoy Wing Night in with Popeye. Popeye's hand-battered wings are marinated full of full 12 hours in Louisiana's seasonings and with five irresistible flavors,
Starting point is 00:00:16 including Ghost Pepper, Honey Garlic and Garlic Pommajon, there's something for everyone. Mmm-mm, we got in by Popeye's and the party more often. Make any night Wing Night in with Popeye. Welcome to R-slash, am I the butthole where OP finds out that her father hates her guts? Am I the butthole for telling my dad that he shouldn't have asked me a question if he wasn't prepared for an honest answer? I'm a 25 year old woman,
Starting point is 00:00:45 and I am not that close to my dad anymore. I was until I was about 13 years old, but that changed. He either only realized it now, or only started to care now that I'm living a more independent life, and he's not as involved as he wants to be. I was 8 when I lost my mom, and we were as close as ever, but I needed more of my father. Then, when I was 11, my dad remarried, and he became a stepdad to a girl who was 10 at the time. Now, this is where the full honesty comes in. I was jealous as hell that my dad was trying to bond with her, and that he called her
Starting point is 00:01:20 his daughter and us, his girls, right away. It made me feel less special. It made me feel like I didn't matter as much because how could someone so new to him be equal to me after hardly any time? Every time he spent time with her, I felt sick. He still spent time with me, but after about six or seven months of marriage, he started to spend more time with a stepdaughter. I hated it.
Starting point is 00:01:44 I was both devastated and furious that she was getting my dad. When I was 13, my dad said how much he preferred hanging out with her over me because they had similar interests. He said that he couldn't spend enough time with his stepdaughter and he was hoping that I would hit the teen phase of not wanting my parents around me that much. He didn't say it directly to me, but I heard him say it. He said this to his best friend and his best friend was like, dude, don't say that out loud. And my dad said that most parents probably feel that way. My dad then said that it wasn't like he would ever tell that to my face. Then
Starting point is 00:02:21 he admitted that he also resented me for not wanting his wife the way her daughter wanted him. He wanted us to be the perfect little family instead of just a step family. So I gave him his wish and over the years he increased the amount of time that he spent with a step daughter. They would do stuff together up to four times a week. That continued until she was 16 in one in space.space. He was devastated by that, and that information crushed me. So I decided that was all I needed to know, and I didn't try to get closer to him. My dad approached me with a question of, hey, after you moved out, why'd you get your boyfriend's dad to help you instead of getting me to help you? My dad
Starting point is 00:03:01 said that he expected me to call him, and he asked me why I had pulled away from him. So I told him everything from the jealousy to what I heard and I told him that if he felt that way I wasn't going to try to get close to him. Dad was offended that I had ever been jealous. He told me it was disgusting to want to deny his stepdaughter the chance at a dad. He also told me that he should be allowed to have interest in common with someone other than me.
Starting point is 00:03:27 I told him that he was, but I was also a kid who lost my mom and clung to my soul living parents. He then accused me of manipulating him by saying all that, and I told him that he shouldn't have asked a question if he wasn't prepared for an honest answer. He told me I could f-right off with that attitude and told me to grow up. Am I the butthole? You know, Opie, when I was reading this, I thought all the way up until the last paragraph,
Starting point is 00:03:51 when you explained in a calm, adult manner why you were behaving the way that you behaved, I thought that he was gonna be like, oh, I made a terrible mistake, what was I doing? I pushed you away and I'm so regretful, and now I've got big feelings about that But instead this guy blames you for him being a bad parent You were 11 when all this happened and he's really getting angry at an 11-year-old
Starting point is 00:04:15 For not being able to handle her emotions in an adult way Dude, it's an 11-year-old little girl who lost her mom. Of course, she's gonna have big feelings about it. OP, you're completely justified here. And more to the point, why would you even want to have a relationship with your dad? At first, I thought that he was just cold and uncaring, but it's worse, he's emotionally abusive. OP, I say do both of you a favor and go no contact
Starting point is 00:04:42 because clearly, you don't want him in your life and he doesn't want you in his life. I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes, I'm giving your dad if you can even call them that four out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for not changing my dog's name when my new neighbor's child has the same name? I'm a 36 year old man and I'm the owner of a beautiful dog named Charlotte. I live in a lower middle-class suburb in the United States. I've lived here for about a year now, and I let Charlotte
Starting point is 00:05:09 out to go potty roughly six or so times a day. It's always the same routine. I open the back door, Charlotte runs outside to pee and patrol the yard, and doesn't typically come bounding back to the door until I poke my head out on collar name. About a week or two ago, new neighbors moved in across my back alley. I had no intentions of interacting with them whatsoever, like ever, except today when I was executing the last step of Charlotte's aforementioned potty protocol. I stuck my head out the door and called her name, but this time, alongside the familiar sounds of my dog galloping up the porch steps was an adult human voice shouting
Starting point is 00:05:45 something like, why are you calling my daughter? At first I thought that it might just be my new neighbor's getting into a spat until a couple of minutes later I heard pounding on my front door. I opened the door to an angry man about twice my size glaring me down. He said something like, why the f are you calling my daughter into your house?" And I responded, your daughter's name is Charlotte, and he kind of just kept glaring at me. So I said, Charlotte is my dog's name, dude, and he rolled his eyes at me and said that I better change my dog's name because he doesn't want his daughter, who's too,
Starting point is 00:06:22 getting confused and running into my house. I told him that's not going to happen, because not only did my dog have the name Charlotte first, but we also lived here first. Plus, I don't like strangers making demands of me before even attempting to be polite. What I didn't say, but really wanted to say, is that teaching his child's stranger danger is his responsibility, not mine. He called me stupid and said that a human child obviously has priority over a dog for a name. I shut the door in his face and stared at him through the people for a moment before
Starting point is 00:06:56 he eventually walked back to his house. This last potty break, I went out with Charlotte and stayed in the yard with her until she finished her business, but the guy just kind of stood in his yard with his arms crossed and glared at me the entire time. I love this top post from Siliah Sally, not the butthole, double down, get another dog and name it his wife's name. And then chalk art says, spectacular, then get a chihuahua and name it after him. Yeah, OP, personally I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. I was almost inclined to go easy on the neighbor because, you know, he's worried for his daughter, he got caught up in the heat of the moment.
Starting point is 00:07:37 But to double down after finding out that this is just a simple misunderstanding is really stupid. So I'm giving the neighbor 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for fat shaming my roommate because she wouldn't stop talking about how fat America is? I'm a 25 year old woman and I'm an American who's been living in London for about 6 months now. My 23 year old roommate Becca has been nice for the most part and I've even come to enjoy your company. My only issue is that she's always taking jobs at America. To clarify, I don't think America is above criticism, and I have no problems shooting shit from time to time.
Starting point is 00:08:14 When I first met her I would laugh along, and I didn't feel any type of way about it. However, it's become too frequent, and as time has gone on, I've started to notice an obnoxious air of superiority every time she does this, which really makes me feel like it's not all in good fun anymore. She'll even refuse to believe me if I correct her when she says something untrue, like when she said, Americans are also stupid because all your tests are multiple choice, and I told her that wasn't true.
Starting point is 00:08:42 She insisted the schools I went to must be different from most schools in America. I've tried to go along with it, as I don't want to be seen like an overly sensitive person, but it's starting to get on my nerves. All of my frustrations came to a head last night when she started talking about how disgusting it was that America is so fat. A topic I've heard her talk about many times. I was in a bad mood. I still tried my best to ignore her, but she just kept going. I've always had to bite my tongue when she talks about America's obesity epidemic because Becca's overweight herself. I finally snapped and said, don't you think this
Starting point is 00:09:18 is a little ironic? She gave me a confused look and asked why she would think that, to which I replied, well I'm an American and I'm a lot thinner than you are. This conversation would make more sense if you were the thin one. She absolutely exploded and told me I had no right to make comments about her body. After that she locked herself up in her room and now she refuses to talk to me. I made some beef stew for dinner tonight as a piece offering, but she still won't acknowledge my presence. I do feel bad about herding her feelings, but I also feel like she shouldn't dish it out if she can't take it. OP, your last sentence was spot on. Why is it okay for her to go around criticizing you and your people, but you can't criticize her? Huh, how's that fair? OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I will admit that you stooped to her level, but she was asking for it.
Starting point is 00:10:08 I'm giving her 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for trying to open my room door at the doctor's office? I just had an embarrassing situation happen at my doctor's office, and I need to know, am I the butthole? I had a doctor's appointment today at 10 a.m. as well as an urgent dentist appointment at 11.30 a.m. My dentist is located about 45 minutes away from where my doctor is, which is relevant to the story. It's also important to note that if you're even
Starting point is 00:10:34 five minutes late for your doctor's appointment at this office, they won't see you. You have to be on time. This is common for most clinics though. I showed up for my doctor's appointment at 9.50 a.m. I pay my copay, the medical assistant showed me back to the room, took my weight, blood pressure, heart rate, and temperature, and let me know that my doctor would be in shortly and close the door.
Starting point is 00:10:55 I waited 45 minutes for the doctor to come in, but she never did. As I said above, I have a dentist appointment, so I decided to leave. I tried to open the door, but the door knob was broken. It turns but the latch doesn't move. So I'm literally stuck in the room. I try the knob again. Nothing. I tap on the door and no one comes.
Starting point is 00:11:17 I jiggle the knob, nothing. I knock on the door, no one hears. So I try to get it to unlatch on my end by trying to push up on the knob and turn it at the same time, by trying to turn it quickly, and by trying to turn the knob while pushing the door towards me so it's also pushing it away from me. This made a lot of noise, and someone started yelling at me to stop from the other side of the door. Someone opened the door, and four staff members were standing there looking at me like I was unhinged.
Starting point is 00:11:46 I apologize and said that I tried to get their attention by knocking, but no one heard. All I got was, oh, we heard, we all heard. That was so unnecessary. I went to the front desk to ask for a refund for the copay since I wasn't seen, and they're all still looking at me like I'm some crazy person. I don't know, it's very embarrassing. Yes, I was irritated that I waited for that long and no one came. I feel like that's a normal and natural reaction to a situation like this, and this is a known issue with that door knob. I've been trapped in that room before, but only for a minute.
Starting point is 00:12:21 It needs to be fixed or replaced. I don't know, what should I have done differently? Wait a few more minutes, try knocking louder? Opie, I'll tell you what you should do differently. Instead of worrying about the approval of these random people who are working into clinic who don't matter to you at all, just call the Fire Marshal.
Starting point is 00:12:39 They would be very interested to hear about your experience. That Dornapp is a huge fire hazard, and if you report this to the Fire Martial, which you should do by the way because it is quite dangerous, the Fire Martial will be there within like 24 hours and they will shut that office down if they don't fix it. Why are they even looking at you like you're a lunatic? Who wants to be locked inside of a room? Opie, you get 0 out of 5 buttles. I'm giving them 1.5 out of five buttles.
Starting point is 00:13:06 Am I the buttle for refusing to make my daughter issue an apology to the class clown and telling her mother that her daughter is a brat? My 14 year old daughter, Ava, is a good kid in general. She gets good grades and she's pretty quiet at school, sticking to her frame group and not causing issues. I was surprised getting a call today that I needed to pick her up since she got in trouble
Starting point is 00:13:26 at school. Basically, what happened was that the class clown Mia was messing around in class, dancing and singing during class for no reason. My daughter had enough and told her to shut the F up that no one likes her and she's the reason that no one enjoys school. A student recorded the whole thing. Mia ended up crying and they were both sent to the principal's office. The principal wants my daughter to apologize to Mia. I told them no and that we're leaving. This led to
Starting point is 00:13:55 Mia's mom telling me that her daughter needs an apology. I told her that her kid is a brat and she should learn how to behave in class. That if she hadn't been annoying, then my daughter wouldn't have snapped at her. The woman called me a jerk, and my daughter is iffy about whether or not she should apologize, so I'm making this. Well, I will say that technically, what your daughter did is a bit rude
Starting point is 00:14:18 because it's not really her place to curse out other students. It would be the teacher's place to control that behavior. But unfortunately, the teacher wasn't doing it. Now that being said, even though what she did was rude, I can't really be mad at her, you know? Because your daughter's right, Mia was causing a disruption and no one was shutting it down so she took it on herself. I think you are right to defend your daughter.
Starting point is 00:14:41 I'm giving you and your daughter zero out of five buttles. I'm giving Mia and her mom zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving Mia and her mom one out of five buttholes. I'm also giving the teacher one out of five buttholes because clearly she's not very good at her job. That was our slash of my the butthole and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new reddit podcast episodes every single day. you

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