rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole For Disowning My Young Daughter?

Episode Date: February 23, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP is a father of a young, teenage girl who gets pregnant. OP is incredibly disappointed in her, and he tells her that he has lost all respect for her and that he refuses to ever speak to her again. He basically tells her to her face that he's disowning her. Then, he turns to the Internet to ask people if he's the butthole in this situation. Yeah, sure, because abandoning your own daughter in her time of need is real grade-a dad behavior, buddy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This NBA season make every three-pointer alley-oop and buzzer-beater even more exciting with FanDuel. Download the app today to see why we're North America's number one sportsbook. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario, Camlin Tom call 1865-312-600 or visit connectcentario.ca Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where we read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash and My The Butthole, where OP calls the cops on a caring for abandoning her child. Am I the butthole for calling the police because the family I tour for keep leaving me with a kid? I'm an afterschool tutor, I do homework help, co-curricular support, and test prep sometimes. I am pretty adamant and clear that you cannot

leave the house while I'm working with your child, because I am not a child care specialist, and I cannot be made responsible of something like a medical episode happens. I also don't want there to be the appearance of impropriety. I don't need the parents in the room or anything, just in the house. Even still, parents occasionally try and use me as an excuse to run a child-free errand to run to the office or whatever else they do. Usually after the first warning it stops, and there's also a financial penalty. Recently, I had a family where the mom evidently left during our session.

This was the first time that it happened. Eventually I needed to leave for my next appointment. I texted and called her, but no response. I wasn't comfortable leaving an eight-year-old kid alone without an adult present. After 15 minutes of waiting and becoming late for my next child, I got nervous and called the police non-emergency line to ask what I should do next. They said they'd send someone over. The police arrived and said they'd wait with her. Of course, I got many angry calls and negative reviews

from this mother now, saying that I created a huge problem for her. And the police things that she's some sort of bad mother now, and a social services agent asked her all kinds of questions and how dare I, et cetera. She claimed she didn't realize the session was only 30 minutes, and thought it would be okay to quickly leave around the corner because I would still be there when she returned. I was comfortable with my decision at first, but she seemed genuinely shaken up

by her interaction with the social agent or officer she spoke to. Also, a friend of mine said this was an uncalled for escalation that could have actually placed a child in more jeopardy than my leaving after the appointment, or that I should have waited for the mom to return and spoken with her first as a warning. Am I the butthole? OP, I'm gonna agree with your friend, it was an uncalled for escalation. But that escalation isn't on you, it's on the mom. She's the one who decided to leave and not come back in time. I mean, maybe she was honest and she did actually get the times wrong, but that's still her fault,

her responsibility. You're not a child care expert and you can't be expected to watch this kid for free when you don't even know where the mother is. You made the right call, Opie. The mother needs to face the consequences of her irresponsible actions. If I were a parent and I had someone teaching my kid and I had to step out, first I would ask if it was okay. Then, only if it was okay I would leave them with my information, tell them where I'm going and give them some sort of emergency contact. This mother didn't do any of that, probably because she wanted to sneak out and

force you into giving her free childcare. Am I the butthole for kicking my stepbrother and his friends out after what they did at my engagement party? I'm a 30 year old guy, and I have a younger stepbrother, Kevin, who's 22. I let him move into my old apartment and pay cheaper rent along with his other two friends because they're struggling with college. They needed a cheaper place, but they couldn't find one. I'd help him out by getting his car fix, lend him money, bring him meals, etc. I also take care of my mom who's in the hospital. So my fiancee and I decided to have a small celebration at a restaurant with 8 people. There were a lot of people, and I wanted to include my mom but I couldn't.

I have high blood pressure that despite medications sometimes gets worse. Kevin wanted to bring his friends to my engagement party. I declined and explained that we were having a small celebration. He was upset but he dropped it. We got to the restaurant and just as we started eating I got a call from Kevin saying that he's at the hospital where my mom is. I asked him why he sounded worried and he told me that mom was very sick and that I had to get there because it seemed like she was having a stroke. I dropped my fork.

My fiance and his parents noticed how pale I was. I hung up. As I was getting ready to leave, they asked what was going on and I told them my mom was very sick and I had to go to the hospital. My fiance wanted to come, but I didn't take her. When I got there, I went to the nurses who were handling my mom's care and they denied her having any sudden issues, let alone a stroke. I felt like I was gonna faint. I called Kevin several times until he picked up. He started laughing and I could hear others laughing in the background.

I was confused, and he told me it was a prank and that I just fell for it. He said that we're even since they couldn't show up to my engagement party. I started yelling at him until he hung up. My fiancee's parents were calling, and I felt terrible because I didn't know what to tell them. It was a prank. My fiancee's family thought that I was lying when I kept saying that my mom was doing okay. So, I drove to my apartment where Kevin was staying.

I got into an argument with him in his buddies. I yelled at them for ruining my engagement dinner and causing me stress, knowing that I have high blood pressure. I told them to pack their things and move out. Kevin started begging, saying that I can't do this over a prank and they had nowhere to go. I told him it wasn't my problem. They kept saying that it was a prank and they didn't expect me to react like that, then they left. My aunt called me saying that Kevin was a butthole for what he did, but kicking him out was extreme and I was too harsh on him. That he's my brother and I need to be supportive of him even though he's acting stupid. I take

some of the blame myself because as my fiancee said, they've done things like this before and I should have stopped them but I didn't because I never imagined them going this far. Kevin's mom is deceased. I help him with whatever I can because I know that he's struggling. His aunt isn't my biological aunt, but I respect her enough to consider her family. But defending this behavior is not acceptable. This is the thing that pisses me off about pranks. Yes, technically, that's a prank, but a prank is like a sliding scale of douchebaggery. On the way towards the zero end of the scale, you've got like pull my finger and then you fart and that's a prank.

And then you've got way up towards the 10 out of 10 douchebag scale are pranks like these where you make someone think that their own mother is dying during a very important social event or like kidnapping someone and stuffing them in the trunk of your car and making them think that they've been kidnapped by murderers and then when they get out you're like, haha, just your friends, it's a prank bro. Yes, technically, that's also a prank. But at some point along the scale of pranking, it stops being just a prank and becomes something that's like genuinely awful. That's what your stupid stepbrother doesn't seem to understand. Yeah, it's a prank,

but still, this prank crossed a line. You have every right to kick your stepbrother out of the apartment. And if your aunt is so concerned about your halfbrother's well-being, then she can take them in. O.P., you get zero out of five buttholes. Your stepbrother gets 4 out of 5 buttholes, and your aunt gets 2 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for refusing to let my sister use my son's yacht for her wedding? My son Thomas passed away a year ago at the age of 25. He was such a sweet soul. He was kind and sympathetic, despite having suffered so much, he still had a joyful smile. He wanted to be an engineer, but unfortunately he couldn't continue his education because he was involved in a car accident. He had a severe injury and became paralyzed. I did everything I could

to help him regain his life, but what happened was devastating. We were spending time with the hospital, while my family was getting together celebrating birthdays, wedding, etc. and excluded me and Thomas. I asked him to show up. To at least show emotional support to Thomas, but they didn't even visit. I took Thomas home and I became his primary career. Thomas was home with me 24-7 with no family visiting us even on holidays. Every time I complained, my sister would suggest that I put Thomas in home care. I stopped begging them to visit and include Thomas in their events and to check in on them. They treated Thomas like he was dead.

Thomas also suffered from anemia. It affected his heart function. His health was getting worse. Four months before he passed away, I decided to achieve at least one goal that he'd had in mind. He'd always wanted to own his own yacht and he wanted to buy it himself. I sold a piece of land that I had for five years and I bought a yacht. I told him that it was his and he was overjoyed.

We started spending most of our time on the yacht, on weekends and on holidays until he suddenly passed away and it was devastating. I couldn't use the yacht until 6 months after his passing. This is where I remember him the most. My family visited, made Facebook tributes, hung pictures of him and visited his grave. I was still upset with him. I kept my distance, but last week my mother and sister were visiting asking if they could use my son's yacht for my sister's wedding this summer. I declined, but they talked about how expensive it is to rent a yacht and that mine was perfect. I corrected

my sister, I told her that it was Thomas' yacht. The Thomas, who they had refused to visit and comfort during his dark times. My sister denied all that and said that she didn't come to talk about the past and that as her brother I should help her out. I argued with her and my mother after they said I was declining out of spite and they called me selfish to punish them for Thomas's death. My other brother said I was wrong because the family is keeping his memory alive by talking about him and then I should get therapy, otherwise I'll be causing people to cut me out. Down in the comments, I love this reply from Batman Boy.

OP, if they didn't visit him once while he was alive, you can just say, fine, you can use his yacht as many times as you visited him while he was alive. Not the butthole, by the way. This episode is brought to you by Lego Duplo. Take your toddler and their most exciting learning adventure yet, with Lego Duplo sets of Everyday Life. From the excitement of the dream playground, to the fun filled three-in-one treehouse,

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to planning an expansion in no time. And with your business platinum card from American Express, you can access spending power and payment flexibility to fuel your growth. Sarah, the contractor is here with the plans. American Express, don't do business without it. Terms and conditions apply as at mx.ca slash business platinum. Am I the butthole for ending my daughter's birthday dinner because she called me and

my wife unethical? I'm a 61-year-old man, and I've been married to my 31-year-old wife for three years. Around summertime in 2020, my wife started saying that she thought for the longest time that she would be okay as a child-free person. But she's been feeling this unbearable itch to have a child that she can call her own. She said that she's never felt as unfulfilled as she does now, and that she doesn't want to be the only one of her friends who dies without a legacy. She discovered that she was pregnant two months ago, and was so excited that she cried.

My daughter is 29 years old, and she and I have birthdays one week apart, so we invited her over for a joint birthday dinner at our house. We saw it as a good chance to break the news that she was gonna have a new half sibling. When my daughter and her soon-to-be husband took their seats, I broke the news to them. Unawkward silence descended, and my daughter crossed her arms across her chest and said, I honestly, wow, I can't be anything other than shocked right now. Her boyfriend interjected in awkward congratulations. My wife was really upset and asked my daughter to elaborate why it was too much to just be happy for us.

My daughter said, Dad, you know you're not 31 anymore. God, you barely chased me and my brother around. Are you gonna do that now? I mean, have you thought about graduations? When her boyfriend tried to interject and her voice rose, she said, No, I cannot feel bad for my half sibling. I'm going to have to get attached and then have to deal with a college kid being depressed that their friends' dads are young.

She started crying and calling both of us unethical as hell for doing this. She excused herself to the bathroom and my wife looked extremely upset. I realized I couldn't sit through a dinner after she insulted the both of us when my wife was already stressed from her pregnancy because gestational diabetes runs in her family. When my daughter came back and asked if we could talk about something else, I said I think it's better if we end a dinner.

She got mad and said that she can't believe that I'm kicking her out for speaking her mind. She protested and said that she wanted to stay and celebrate our birthdays, but I insisted that she leave. She said thanks for ruining her night and her birthday next week. I'm the bottle for ending birthday celebrations for both of us because a lot of mean things were said and it was too emotionally charged, her boyfriend seemed relieved. Alright, so down in the comments of this thread, everyone is blasting on OP and calling him the butthole.

But I'm gonna be honest, I disagree with those takes. That probably means that I'm gonna get blasted in the comments, but here goes. Try to keep an open mind on this. So first of all, some people are calling OP super gross for marrying a woman who's almost the same age as her daughter. And like, yeah, it's a little bit weird, but OP is an adult. His wife is an adult. If they want to get married, they have every right to get married. Also, a lot of people are saying that it's really messed up that they want to have a kid this late in life because when their kid is 18, OP will be like 80 or something. Like, yeah, that's true. The kid probably won't have much of an opportunity to know the father, but does that mean that they don't have a right to have a kid? By that logic, anyone who has a

terminal illness and who will die in like 5-10 years also doesn't deserve to have a child. Yeah, it's like definitely unfortunate. I would feel sorry for the kid that they wouldn't get to, you know, grow up with a loving parent throughout their entire lives, but not everyone's family situation is the same. I mean, a single woman is allowed to have a kid by herself, right? If a woman decides, hey, I just want to disseminate myself at a sperm bank and have a kid and raise it as a single mom, that's fine. No one bats an eye at that. So why is it that that's okay? But it's not okay to have a father for just you know until the age of 15 or 18 when the father dies of old age

Now some people are saying that OP was the butthole because they broke it on the birthday party and Yeah, I guess I can kind of see that argument. It's maybe not the best time to break that news But just because it's bad timing. does that make OP a butthole? No, not really, more just like a little socially clueless. At most I could give OP like maybe one out of five buttholes for the bad timing. Personally, I think the daughter was being more of a butthole than the father. Yeah, she was speaking her mind and she was being honest with her father, but there's also the wife's feelings to consider. She's pregnant, she's excited, she was speaking her mind and she was being honest with her father, but there's also the wise feelings to consider. She's pregnant, she's excited, she wants people to be happy for, but the first words out of her daughter-in-law's mouth is something negative.

That would be pretty crushing for a lot of people, and OP tried to protect his wise feelings by kicking his daughter out for the night. I thought it was a pretty diplomatic way to handle that situation. Am I the butthole for calling a woman an idiot when she refused to listen to why my daughter his daughter out for the night. I thought it was a pretty diplomatic way to handle that situation. Am I the butthole for calling a woman an idiot when she refused to listen to why my daughter isn't vaccinated? I'm a 20 year old woman, and my 2 year old daughter had a heart transplant due to CHD, and is severely immunocompromised. As a result, she can't receive live virus vaccines.

I'm in a young mom's group on Facebook, and the topic of daycare is in being a stay-at-home mom came up. I said my boyfriend is the breadwinner, and I stay at home with our daughter because I can't rest in here to daycare because she's not vaccinated. One woman, who's the same age as me with a newborn, started off. There's this one new member in the group

who's the same age as me, and she has a newborn, and all the other women already know of my daughter's medical history. She started calling me names and said that I don't belong here if I'm so anti-vaxx. I told her my daughter is a transplant patient and can't be vaccinated. She just told me to stop making excuses. I said, you're an absolute idiot. If you even looked at my profile for a second, you'd know that I'm an advocate for vaccines.

And if you had a bit of research, you'd know that giving someone who severely compromised a live virus vaccine is a bad idea. She was clearly very upset, and she posted a rant about me onto the group, and a few of the members said I was a butthole for calling her an idiot. Am I the butthole? So it's okay for her to call you out, but it's not okay for you to call her out. Nah OP, she's a hypocrite. You get, I'll say, one out of five buttholes because you could have handled that a bit more

diplomatically and she gets two out of five buttholes. But honestly, I can't really blame her too much because when someone says they haven't vaccinated their kids, what everyone typically thinks first is that there's some sort of crazy anti-vaxxer. Am I the butthole for telling my wife that I don't have to speak to our daughter until I feel comfortable? I found out a couple of days ago that our 17 year old daughter is pregnant.

I was so angry that I just went numb and walked away. I've never been so disappointed in my life. We used to be super close, but I don't even talk to her anymore. Today, my daughter came over to me while I was watching TV and asked if we were still watching the Super Bowl together. I was going to ignore her, but I told her. This is the last time I'm speaking to you, because obviously everything I've been telling to you over the years just goes in one year and out the other.

I've never been so disappointed in my life. I told you about safe intercourse, condoms, and birth control. On top of that, you betrayed my trust. You used to tell me everything. I argued with your mother all those times about letting you go to your boyfriend's house because I thought you were responsible that you would come to me if anything happened. But I was wrong. So from now on, don would come to me if anything happened, but I was wrong. So from now on, don't talk to me ever again.

Anything you want to talk to me about, go tell your mother and have her pass it on to me. Later, my wife comes into my dinner and asks me what happened. I told her to ask her daughter. She said she did, but she couldn't understand her because she was crying so much. I told her what I said, and she got upset and said that I have to talk to her. I told her, no, I already did. And I'm not talking to her again until I feel comfortable. And I don't know when that might be.

Maybe never. Oh, he. Really? Like, really? You really don't understand that you're the butthole here? You criticize your daughter because she used to tell you everything, but based on this story, I don't believe it. Like when was the last time she told you everything?

When she was 5? Because based on the way you reacted to this news, I wouldn't blame your daughter at all for not keeping you up to date on her life. You weigh overreacted here, and you're cutting your daughter out instead of showing her support when she needs it most. Opie, I'm getting this answer from this post that you're one of those parents who thinks that the way to raise kids is to punish kids, not support, and nurture kids. You sound like a cold and heartless father.

I feel sorry for your daughter. That style of parenting will fly in like the 1930s, but in 2021, no, you're the major butthole here. Opie, I'm giving you 4 out of 5 buttholes. That was our slash of my The Butthole, and if you like this content, check out my Patreon where I publish extra episodes. Also, be sure to follow this podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day. Also, be sure to follow this podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.