rSlash - r/Pettyrevenge Steal from Me? I'll Steal EVEN MORE from You!
Episode Date: September 18, 2023Go to PrizePicks.com/reddit and use code reddit for a first deposit match up to $100! 0:00 Intro 0:08 Neighbor 2:26 Wallet 5:24 My email 6:46 University material 10:13 Schnapps 12:28 In trouble 13:35... Take everything Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Welcome to our slash Petty Revenge, where OP tricks his stupid neighbor into robbing himself.
Our next reddit post is from Big Tech's.
I rented a duplex in my early 20s.
My neighbor was a wannabe gangster type and made the mistake of breaking into my vehicle one night.
I had a small SUV with a removable soft top, so the neighbor figured that it would be easy
pickings to just peel back the top and help himself to my stereo, amplifier, CDs, and some other
miscellaneous stuff.
I discovered the break in early the next morning after it occurred.
I knew for certain who the culprit was. We weren't in a heavily populated area and my neighbor
was well known for his thievery. I waited for him to leave his place, and when the opportunity arose,
I went around the back of his house and looked through the bedroom window to find that,
sure enough, my stuff was sitting right on the floor inside of his apartment.
I instinctively tried the window, and as luck would have it, the sash went right up.
Bingo!
I hopped through and quickly surveyed the items laying around.
It occurred to me that I could get some excellent revenge here if I played my cards right.
So rather than just recoup my stuff and wind up in a fight over it, I borrowed a marker
and proceeded to write my name on all of my stuff, as well as a few choice items of his
just for good measure.
I then climbed back out of my window and waited.
When he finally came back, I called for some police presence and explained to them how
my vehicle got robbed,
and I knew that it was my neighbor because I literally saw my stuff through his window.
We knock on his door, and I can still remember the look on this guy's face seeing me in
the cops standing there.
He wasn't even close to ready for that encounter, and almost certainly had drugs on him, so
he was very cooperative given the circumstances.
I politely explained that I knew
that he had broken into my vehicle
and I needed him to return my stuff immediately
or I'd press charges.
He went and retrieved my things
and I pointed out my name written on them to the officer.
I said, what about my other stuff?
Well, the thief looked around, puzzled, and dumbfounded.
I rattled off a couple of other choice items of his that I'd also put my name on earlier.
The look on this guy's face while he handed over his stuff to me while the cop was standing there was priceless.
Our next Reddit post is from Charming University.
Back in college, I had better credit than my three other roommates,
so I put our internet and TV under my name.
Otherwise, the deposit would have been 600 bucks.
The cable company offered me a $300 visa gift card
upon sign up.
Two months later, I called them
because the gift card never arrived.
They tell me they sent it a few weeks ago,
and eventually I'm able to find out from Visa
that someone used it at
what a burger, a target and a liquor store near my house.
I'm pissed off because obviously one of my roommates used it, but I don't know which one.
A few weeks later, roommate number 2 complains that their $200 birthday gift card to target
has gone missing.
His mom still had the receipt, and the store was able to tell
her that someone used it at the target near our house. He's obviously pissed off too, but
now we've realized that it's probably one of the other two roommates. A couple of weeks
after that, roommate number three is while it disappears.
We turned the house upside down looking forward, and we knew that it had to be in the house
because her car key is attached to her wallet, and her car that it had to be in the house because her car
key is attached to her wallet, and her car is parked at the house. She is absolutely
frantic, sobbing, screaming, hyperventilating. She's throwing stuff everywhere, just having
an absolute meltdown while tearing the house apart.
We had never seen her behave like this before, so we're all kind of surprised she would
be that upset about her wallet.
It's stressful, sure, but I was genuinely concerned about how she was reacting.
She says the gift-card thief must have taken it, implying that it was roommate number
four, the only person who hadn't had something stolen yet.
A few days later, I found that roommate's wall in the trunk of my car.
We had gone to get groceries together, and I guess she just laid it in the trunk while we were unloading. I'm like, oh my gosh,
I found her wallet! And then I opened it up because I'm just excited to confirm that I did
indeed find her wallet. Bam! Both stolen gift cards front and center. No doubt. The Visa gift card
has my name printed on it.
And roommate number 2's mom had written something in Sharpie on his gift card.
I realized she had a meltdown because she was afraid that we'd find out that she was
the thief.
I left the wallet.
Cash and all?
Right where it was.
Pushed up against the inner lip of the trunk so that you couldn't see it unless you
leaned further into the car.
A locksmith wouldn't make her new keys without the title to her car, and the title was in the glove
box of her locked car. All in all, she had to spend about 500 bucks replacing her driver's license,
title, and keys. Not to mention not being able to drive her car for two weeks. I moved out of
a state with her wallet still in my car. I finally tossed it
in the trash several months later. Sometimes, the universe assists you with petty revenge.
Yeah, OP, it sounds like the universe has sifted you with some karma. Get it? Karma with a sea?
Our next Reddit post is from Uber. I got Gmail about 20 years ago when it first came out,
so I was able to snag a simple
email, just my first initial and last name.
Think like Jay Smith at gmail.com.
For the last several years, I've been getting all kinds of spam and legitimate emails from
someone with my first initial and last name.
Some of these emails seem pretty important.
For instance, hotel reservations and train tickets have both been
sent to my email. In the past, I've tried contacting this person with the phone number that I find
in the emails and asked her to stop using my email account. She brushes me off every time,
basically telling me to f-off. Apparently, she just started shopping at Coles because I've
been getting all of her reward email. Since she decided that she isn't going to stop using my email, I used her $50 in Coles
cash that she sent to my email a couple of weeks ago, and I just used another $20 today.
As far as I'm concerned, she's aware that she's using my email.
Therefore, she's gifting me her Coles cash.
Thanks for the new belt in jeans, Jessica.
Keep them coming.
Opie, even better, just start cancelling every single thing that she sends to your email.
You said that she did hotel reservations and train tickets?
Okay, well then just cancel them.
Let her work out the details once she goes to the hotel and finds that there's no reservation
in her name.
Our next reddit post is from pineapple.
Back in high school, I struggled hard.
I had a stepdad who adopted me and then ignored me my whole life.
And a mom who was wrapped up in making his life perfect.
Yeah, he was what some might call a textbook narcissist,
with my mom as his flying monkey.
Anyway, school was a difficult time for me,
and I had a lot of anxiety and a hard time focusing.
I attended all my classes and was
always doing very well in my assignments, but I had trouble completing them. I had the same
guidance counselor all through high school, and I would start every year with meeting her.
Each time, I would explain that I needed more help because I was struggling with focus.
She brushed me off every time, stating that I obviously wasn't trying hard enough because
I had no excuse since my stepdad was, wait for it, a social worker for the school board
and a personal friend of hers.
Yeah, it was awful.
At the end of high school, we had our obligatory meeting about what colleges or universities
or trade schools to apply to.
I told my counselor that I was interested in psychology
and I'd like to be a counselor or to teach psychology.
The woman scoffed!
Literally scoffed at me!
She said, and I quote,
please do not apply to a university.
It would be a huge disappointment for you.
You are not university material,
and you may be better with a community college or even
a certificate in administration.
Now let me say that there's nothing wrong with going to community college or getting
a certificate in something.
Nothing at all.
But this woman's words would haunt me my whole life.
I wanted to pursue something that I was very interested in, and she essentially told
me that I wasn't smart enough or capable enough to do it. Fast forward to my late 20s. I worked at a variety of small jobs here and there
and became very depressed. I finally decided one day that, eff it, I'm applying for university.
Well I got in and I graduated with honors. So I went to Teachers College for another bachelor's
degree. Again I graduated with honors.
And about five years ago, I finally finished my master's in behavioral psychology.
Two years ago, my stepdad died.
And who's at the visitation?
My old guidance counselor.
She came over and started talking to me immediately like she knew me, like we're old friends.
I cut her off and said, I'm so sorry, you
must be confusing me with someone else. She looked absolutely shocked and said, I was
your guidance counselor for four years, and I just shook my head, gave the best blank
look I could give, shrugged and said, sorry, I honestly don't remember you. When I left,
she looked a bit confused and disappointed.
I think she had hoped for me to have all these good memories of her, how helpful she was
to me as a teen.
But nope, I wanted her to feel like she was nothing to me, that she had zero effect.
But even though she did affect me, I was not going to let her know that.
I felt pretty good about that.
Also, OP adds in clar to let her know that. I felt pretty good about that. Also, OP ads
and clarifying details in an update. My mom had run into my guidance counselor a few
times at the grocery store before this, and she bragged about my accomplishments, so I
didn't have to tell her about them. She already knew that I was successful. Since she already
knew, I pretended that she was a nobody to me to ensure that she understood she contributed nothing.
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Our next Reddit post is from two spinning triangles.
I bought a house on a corner when I moved into this area.
I kept the yard cut and clean. This corner seems to be a place where trash was thrown out
regularly. From the beginning, I kept finding peppermint
snaps pints along one of the fence lines. The first one I hit with a mower.
It seemed every day I would see one on along one of the fence lines. The first one I hit with a mower.
It seemed every day I would see one on my property in the same spot.
I knew it had to be a neighbor, so I quit throwing them in the recycling bin and started to
collect one after another.
I hoped to eventually find whoever had this bad habit.
I filled one huge garbage bag, then one turned into two.
One day I was off work early and trimming the hedges by my house.
Then I heard it.
A thunk followed by something hitting the fence.
I finally caught the litter bug.
Now I have the car and the driver.
I jumped in my truck and hit the direction the guy went.
I saw the guy get out of his car and go inside of his house.
I drove back home
and collected all the bottles. Later that evening, I went to this man's house. There was
another car in the driveway. I got out, rang the doorbell, and walked back to get the bags.
An older woman answered the doors I was coming back. She asked if she could help me. I said,
yes, I told her that I dealt with this problem and I was tired of it.
At this point, the husband has come outside.
I took one bag and dumped all the bottles on the driveway.
The bottles broke and flopped around.
I grabbed the other bag and did the same.
I told him I was sick of picking up after him
and I had better not see another pint in my yard.
The woman immediately turned her husband and started yelling at him.
Apparently, he had a bad drinking problem and promised that he'd quit.
He would down the pints before he got home and my yard was his dumping zone.
I never did see another bottle of snaps after this.
Opie, that's pretty good revenge, but what you should have done is gone to the local police
station and say, hey, just so you know, every single day at such and such a time,
a guy drives by this street with an open bottle of alcohol that he throws outside.
So if you want a super easy drunk driving ticket, here's the time in place.
Only then, after he gets arrested, bring the bottles to the wives place.
Our next reddit post is from pasta mark.
I have a one year old son and we decided to go to the playground one day.
On this day, a bunch of kids were there, among whom was a bratty four year old or so
girl who had a mean streak to her.
My son, who didn't know better, went close to the girl and she just tells him, what are
you doing here?
You're not invited here?
I did not like my son being bullied, but I figured that he probably doesn't understand these things yet,
and I didn't want to be one of those sensitive helicopter parents who shelters their kid from everything.
So I just took my son and we played elsewhere.
Later on, I see that the girl's grandma was there, and it seemed like she's not one of those
Lucy Goosey grandma's. So while the girl was close to her grandma, it dawned on me that I could bait her to be
mean to my kid in front of Granny.
So I placed my son close to the girl since I figured that he wouldn't understand
any ways, and it worked.
She said, you're not welcome here, go away!
And her grandma heard, and she got in trouble, and the grandma said they would go home now
since she can't be nice.
The four-year-old tried to fight it but she couldn't do anything. Our next reddit post is from
Haya Bank Ranger. I had a girlfriend. We were bad for each other and, unsurprisingly, she was cheating
on me. I found out in a rather dramatic way and had a full-on mental breakdown. The dude she was
cheating with had been fed a bunch of lies to keep him from
talking to me and started threatening me with violence. Long story short, we broke up, she moved out
of our place and into his place and I started therapy. A few months goes by and I realized in therapy
that I wasn't just upset about my ex-girlfriend but also about my whole life. I decided to get a new job, a new place to
live, a new everything. The day that I got my new job offer, I saw an email come into my
old work email account. I recognized the name on the email as the guy who was threatening
me and now living with my cheating ex, so I referred him to my boss. I talked about how
great this guy was, that I'd only heard good things,
and hey, since I was putting in my two week notice, they should definitely hire him.
The dude comes in for an interview, and I'm on the interview panel. When we're in the
room together alone, he's like, dude, I'm sorry bro, for all the things I said. Thank
you so much for helping me out. I say, no sweat, my ex-girlfriend always had good things to say about you, and I know she
has a good picker, after all she chose both of us and we chuckled like polite people.
He actually does okay on the interview and gets the job.
However, this job is a disaster.
I'm not exaggerating when I say that this is the worst job I've ever had.
The place that I was moving to paid me twice as much for a third of the work.
I was so relieved to be leaving.
When I moved out of my place a month later, my landlord asked me if I knew anyone who
was looking.
I gave her the guy's phone number.
My old apartment looks super charming when you first see it, but after you've been living
there for a while, you realize
it is absolute trash. My buddy from my old job told me that the cheating guy jumped on my apartment
offer. So now, this guy has my old shitty job, my old shitty apartment, and my old shitty girlfriend.
I hope that he enjoys my life somehow more than I did, but I doubt it. Also, I do know that they broke up about two months later.
This feels like the plot to either a horror movie
or a comedy show where there's like a cursed girlfriend
or a cursed apartment and a cursed job, I guess.
And some poor sap could stuck with all three
and then the next person rotates in and they get all three
and then the next person gets all three weird.
That was our slash Petty Revenge. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast
because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.