Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 603
Episode Date: October 7, 2019No guest this week as we take time to remember grampa, and talk about Eric Clapton, New Brunswick, and flying in the middle seat....
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Hi, he's Dave Shumka and he's Graham Clark and together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself.
Woo!
Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 603 of Stop Podcasting Yourself.
My name's Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who's feeling a little under the weather.
The whole clan's feeling under the weather.
Mr. Dave Shumka.
Yeah, sick family.
Sick day.
We're recording this at home.
Margot has missed two days of school now.
But she's caught up on two days of The View.
True.
So Annette's worth something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, she's caught up on two days of the view so and that's worth something
yeah yeah yeah um she's she really likes megan mccain well she's the most kind of child friendly
yeah she's the most muppety yeah people would say joy bayhart people would say whoopi goldberg
yeah i mean uh what i wouldn't give for a muppet version of the view i bet they do and they call it the um the u and the letter u yeah yeah yeah yeah that's pretty good
that would be a parody so lost like it's like who would that be for for
it'd be for me basically well basically i i don't know there was a lot of um like i remember they did a version of
let it be that was letter b yeah it was i i mean i guess kids like the beatles sure but uh at a
certain point these are just for the grown-ups yeah yeah the funny thing like uh should we get to know us? Yeah. Get to know us.
The past guest, Charlie Demers, was a voice on a show that was based all on Beatles music.
Yeah, still is.
Yeah.
But when you watch the show, you're like, I have no problem imagining that these songs were written for kids.
Right.
Like, there's not a lot of stuff in there that, like, a kid couldn't sing along to.
I mean, they do.
I thought Charlie was joking when he said they did a version of Why Don't We Do It In The Road that was about traffic safety.
And there is a version, there's a song in one of the episodes, this show is called Beat Bugs.
Yeah. If you're, if you don't have Netflix.
There's one called, there's one where they all get captured by a guy who's got no friends and he won't let them leave.
And they're stuck in like jam.
And he's singing, say the word and you'll be free uh it's like they have to come up with the
word the word is love i uh i watched i don't watch a couple episodes but i watched one where
it was no nowhere man he was uh he was a worm that uh that hung out by himself that's uh speaking
of children's music nowhere man is a song that
used to make abby cry when she was a kid she's like sad it's yeah yeah he's got uh you know
nowhere nothing to do yeah or i i always get it confused with the fool on the hill i don't think
i know the fool on the hill day after day alone on a hill a man with a foolish grin is keeping perfectly still well maybe is that white album is that
like later maybe it's magical mystery tour but that might be nowhere man no nowhere man i feel
i don't know i don't know i was watching a documentary about eric clapton oh yeah yesterday Eric Clapton yesterday. And... The birds.
Nope.
Yardbirds?
The Yardbirds.
Yeah.
He like, he unceremoniously quit like three bands.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Without telling the members.
He just joined a new band.
What a dick.
Is Eric Clapton a dick?
Oh, totally.
Yeah.
And there was like a...
He was... And there was like a, he was, when George Harrison's wife, Patty Boyd, was married to George Harrison, there were like eight years where Eric Clapton would call her up every day and say, are you leaving him yet for me?
There's something about that era of music that like, I don't hear those type of stories about the current like post
2000 there's not
like a lot of stories like that but there's like a ton
of stories like that rock and
roll starts from the 70s yeah
and just like
I watched it because I was like
I don't like the blues
I feel
like I find him so boring except for like five great songs.
Yeah.
But maybe his life was interesting.
Was it?
Yeah.
And he was super on drugs and alcohol.
And there was this thing that was like they kind of glossed over it when he was super drunk.
Yeah.
He like had this racist rant on stage oh yeah and he would have been canceled today totally but like
they kind of gloss over it and i i wasn't really paying attention because it was like a minute of
the thing when i was doing other stuff and uh i went and so i just googled uh eric clapton n word i i didn't even google the word yeah
and he didn't say it but he did say because i just assumed that that was the word he used yeah
but it wasn't that it was just like a long like drawn out on stage rant about if you're not white go back go where go back where you came from jesus britain
is white keep britain white wow yeah i the thing about uh man i shot the sheriffs pretty good
oh wait he didn't write yeah he didn't write that he uh it was the whole thing about him when i was uh growing up is that he released that
unplugged album that was the first time i ever heard of him and i was like i don't care for this
and uh and then he had a song about cocaine and i was like huh like they're not even trying to
you know it's not a lucy in the sky with diamonds
or anything just like literally like cocaine yeah and like what if it was a song about heroin but
he's like no but i'm gonna say cocaine but and he's like it's the famous recording of it is the
live one yeah and the whole audience goes okay yeah what a cool decade yeah yeah it definitely like
i can see why so many filmmakers and stuff make movies set during that time because everything's
filthy it was before power wash or something that's true so it's like everything's very textured you know but it's like uh yeah just like it feels like it
was before uh people were like oh yeah you shouldn't uh you shouldn't do that it feels
like it was the last decade where people were doing crazy shit and then the 80s was like a lot
of paying back for that bad behavior oh yeah the 80s was don't do drugs.
It was don't do drugs.
Say no to drugs.
And there was, you know, like a lot of the AIDS epidemic.
And there was a lot of things that in the 70s, if they existed, the 70s wouldn't have been as freaky, I guess.
Yeah, sure.
But the 70s seems really freaky. Yeah, they were a freaky, I guess. Yeah, sure. But the 70s seems really freaky.
Yeah, they were a freaky time.
It was a one-long, like, Freaky Friday came out in the 70s.
It was the first time that, like, the culture at large
was really experimenting with body swapping.
Yeah, from wife swapping to body swapping.
It was quite the decade.
But, yeah, like, it's so funny too like uh that there was actually a time when one of those vans that had like you know the the spray
painted like a pegasus on the side or whatever like that was my whole life that was a punchline
yeah but like there was a time when it was like.
There's now a bar in town that is styled that way.
Oh, really?
Like it's got the van doors on it.
Oh, cool.
And it's got like, I don't know about the inside.
But I think it's like shag carpeting and bench seats.
I'm not entirely sure.
The windows can't all be like diamond shape, right?
Yeah, probably legally. You have to have some square windows what's it called uh uh i want to say it's called the boogie van
that's a great that's a great name for a bar great theme for a bar i like a themed bar you know that
um and i'll have to check this out it'll become my although it's hard to make a theme bar your local, you know?
Yeah.
Like, a theme bar is, like, fun to check out once in a while.
But would you go to the Boogie Van every week?
Maybe.
Maybe.
Hmm.
It seems to be called Boogie Van, but it's part of another restaurant.
I'm confused.
Anyway.
So, like, in the Eric clapton documentary uh what bar is a uh the back of one oh cool
yeah it's pretty cool like the actual bar itself and there's like sci-fi fantasy i love it i love
paintings on the wall yeah it looks good yes about eric clapton You there? Did he, was he like famous as a guy in bands or did he become famous once he went solo?
He was.
Yeah, it was all like, he was one of these kind of mythical talents.
Right.
Where he was like, you know, he was the best blues guitarist in Southern England.
um you know he was the best blues guitarist in southern england it does when you put it that way it does seem like a low bar like
like who uh who else yeah well it was like all the all the famous bands from the time were from
up north yeah and so but that can't be right like aren't the um rolling stones like london
yeah yeah i think so i'm not sure but he was like the best guy who wasn't who wouldn't like sell out
right like the yardbirds put out a hit song and he left the band right joined the blues breakers
and then formed cream because they were just crazy good musicians.
But they had hits, and then they were fighting,
and so he left and played with other people.
Right.
Is he in Faces?
No.
No, okay.
And then Derek and the Dominoes.
So he was in a bunch of bands that didn't have his name on them.
Right.
And then just like...
And then eventually he was like
um got an acoustic guitar yeah yeah yeah i don't need you guys i'll i'll do was he the first
the first big unplugged yeah i remember i got like a best of mtv unplugged album by the way there's no guest this week um a best of mtv unplugged cd and he
wasn't the first ever no no but like but like the big because there were only like a handful of big
ones yeah there was that and then nirvana maybe that was it maybe lauren hill yeah i remember Yeah. I remember Dennis Leary did one. But they did, he said the first,
or one of the first bands that showed up to do it was Squeeze.
Oh, yeah.
And they brought electric guitars.
They didn't get it.
No one explained it to them.
So they had to go to a music store and buy a bunch of acoustic guitars.
And they hadn't practiced doing acoustic.
Oh, man. Just imagine being the clerk working that day squeeze walks in uh we need a bunch of acoustic guitars what's your return policy
like what's the best guitar I can return tomorrow?
Yeah, the, I haven't watched, I think I watched a music documentary.
I did, I watched a music documentary about the guy who wrote the Lion Sleeps Tonight.
A whim away?
A whim away, yeah.
From Away Luggage?
Yeah.
It's written by a guy.
Like, it's not an old folk song.
Okay.
You know what I mean? Like, it hasn't been passed down through.
No one's tallying any bananas about this thing.
No, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, he wrote it.
And then, but like, when it came to America, people thought that it was like a folk song.
It does have that feel.
Yeah. And then, so he never got any royalties off of all the versions of it so they thought oh so everyone was just like yeah
traditional yeah traditional we don't owe any money exactly we can just everybody can record
it wow yeah and then the documentary was about a guy trying to get the disney to oh is it in the lion king yeah yeah uh why uh that's a
fair question because it's not a jukebox musical and it's not in the jungle
or do they sing it in the jungle part is there they sing the whim away part i know that but like
but do they sing it on the Savannah?
Hmm.
Hmm.
That's a good question.
That's right.
It does take place mostly in the Savannah.
Yeah.
Hmm.
Is the Timon and Pumbaa part technically the jungle?
Yeah.
Well, they seem, yeah.
I've only seen the 2019 version.
And I haven't seen it.
So I don't know.
I don't know what takes place where.
I watched a bit of the updated Aladdin on the plane.
Oh, boy.
No part of that worked, you know?
We've been watching the original.
Yeah.
Great.
It's dicey.
But it's a career-defining role for Robin Williams.
For Scott Weiner, the voice of Aladdin.
It's also, before Robin Williams, I don't think anyone, well, I might be wrong about this.
I'm by no means a Disney file.
I don't think the actors and singers were the same person.
Oh, yeah, that's probably true.
In general.
Yeah.
But Robin Williams sang the songs and did the acting.
It was a triple threat.
And then I...
He could dance as well.
But then, yeah, like all the new ones are, you know,
Kristen Bell and Mandy Moore and... Yeah, yeah, yeah. new ones are, you know, Kristen Bell and Mandy Moore and...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Adele Nazeem.
Is, uh, yeah, yeah.
I don't, because I went to a restaurant once, and there was, you know, like, signed headshots on the wall.
Uh-huh.
And there was a signed headshot from the guy who did the voice of Jiminy Cricket.
Sure.
Yeah, exactly.
But I wonder if he, I wonder if he sang.
Oh, yeah.
I don't know about like, I have no idea about any of that old, old, especially the old timey stuff.
Yeah.
But I feel like in the old times, like you couldn't be an entertainer that just did one thing.
Like you.
There was no such thing as a
single threat yeah yeah you had to so i feel like if you were doing voiceovers they would be like
okay now sing this song in c minor and you would just know how to well it's like if you uh like
now there's people who are just famous for being famous yeah uh the The idea of, I guess, like, Zsa Zsa Gabor was kind of that.
Yeah, but I think she could act.
She was the sister of Ava Gabor.
And was Ava Gabor the one that could act?
Well, she was on Green Acres.
Oh, okay.
I think.
I might be getting all these details wrong.
I don't care about black and white TV shows.
I never saw a second of Green Acres.
But I know, so, so like especially back then it must have been tough for like uh you know fred astaire singing dancing and
acting yeah like i i couldn't get a reservation because of jaja gabor yeah i mean no talent like zero threat yeah because uh even like i was reading uh an autobiography by wc
field uh-huh and uh he like juggled he was like one of the best jugglers in america and he could
also do trick pool shots and uh and then he was also hilarious like so he could do that was but that was what you
needed to have an act like you couldn't just be hilarious and you couldn't just be good at pool
shots how could you what like what's on his rider he traveled he traveled by train with a pool table
but how did it was it on an like how did he show the audience was the
audience all above him that's a good that's a very good question i never thought maybe there
was a mirror involved oh that makes sense yeah but like also imagine going to like going out
on a friday and like oh there's a guy who can do pool shots that would be great though yeah it would like that's what america's got talent
yes should be they should disqualify singers yeah no singers uh only a dance group if they've got a
really sad story yep uh and then yeah just like weird. That like, I want to do a show in Vegas because I can do this thing no one's ever seen before.
Yeah.
Like, I like, I like the idea of a vaudeville show of like going and then seeing like the pool trick shots, then like a monologue, uh, you know, written by Abraham Lincoln.
And then a monologue uh but you know written by abraham lincoln and then a monologue written
by abraham lincoln oh hi there i didn't see you yeah four score and seven beers ago
and then uh you know some uh sword swallowing some knife throwing you know fire uh and then
just round it all out with like what would be
what would be the headliner of a show like that i guess pool pool tricks yeah um yeah it's a weird
it's like a weird wild stuff man yeah well in the in aladdin it's it of, I mean, the first like 10 minutes, you're like, this movie's
canceled.
Because like in the first song, they're like, isn't it barbaric over here?
Yeah.
And then they go to the bazaar and it's like, these people, they're all sword swallowers
and walking on fire and lying on beds of nails.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. I mean, was there a time when that was what the market was
i mean how would how would i know would i read a book about this maybe a guy
yeah that's true there probably was just the one guy but everybody was like
this is going to be part of the stereotype forever.
I'm just imagining like, okay, well, the brainstorming session.
Yeah.
We got a sword swallowing guy.
We got a snake charmer.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Totally.
That would be a great headlining set.
Guy that charms snakes.
I haven't seen that on America's Got Talent.
Not sure it's a real thing that people actually ever do.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like seems really dangerous.
Yeah.
Indiana Jones was not a fan of it.
Yes.
Yes.
Correct.
Did not like snakes.
If he was one of the judges.
Uh, what do you think indiana um dr jones dr jones um so uh how's it going what's going on well guys it's gonna be
we did some goofing around and we hope you enjoyed it but this is going to be a sad little bit uh because
um we had to put down my beloved dog grandpa yeah he was 15 years old um so yeah so so uh
this isn't gonna be the whole show we'll talk about it for a little while. But yeah, we're going to talk about it for a bit.
Feel free to interrupt.
It's still a show.
It's still a comedy show.
But we had to put him to sleep.
He was 15 and his health problems just kind of piled up.
Yeah.
And he had this infected tooth.
Yeah.
And if we corrected it, like if we we would have to
put him to sleep to to we wouldn't the vet would yeah yeah yeah that would be very
rude of the vet to be like you bring him already yeah you want a discount on this so we can
you bring him already knocked out yeah and then we'll take care of the tooth uh so yeah they would
have to pull the tooth and even then like there's no guarantee he would recover right and if he
recovered it would take a while and he wouldn't be 100 of what he was and what he was was only
a shadow of what he used to be anyway and he like it it also wouldn't correct his like breathing problems and digestion and he was having
seizures as well so so we um yeah so we decided that we should uh put him to sleep very hard to
it is and they like you only ever hear people say like i just we waited too long No one's ever like, we did it too soon. Yeah. But I mean, God, it's so hard.
Yeah.
You know, my parents had to put down their dog a couple of years ago.
Same thing, you know, just like mounting problems.
And like, it's like you say nobody ever uh yeah nails it like this was the exact right time
it was it's always like oh yeah yeah or well i mean i guess you could nail it if it's like
he's super healthy and then one day he's just like uh got inoperable right something yeah yeah
uh yeah but it's so Yeah, but it's tough.
It must have been so tough on you to decide because it's like, do we wait another week?
Yeah, so we got the diagnosis that that's what he needed.
That was going to be the surgery.
And well, first, we brought him in and we've been bringing him in like once a week
lately because he would just have like a lump show up and we'd be like is this lump okay and
they'd be like yeah it's just a fatty lump or like we'd be feeling him and his stomach would
just be crooked right like one side would be really hard and packed and the other side would
feel normal right and they would
say it's just another fatty lump but it's just like it's totally healthy but it's just it's just
this is what's happened yeah he's just what he is now yeah uh so we brought him in because he wasn't
eating and they and we he wouldn't let us look at his teeth so we brought him in and they were like
yeah it looks like his tooth is infected.
We'll give him antibiotics for a week.
We'll probably have to pull it after that.
And so we started feeding him like canned food, wet food.
Yeah.
He'd never had it before and he loved it.
Yeah.
It's gross.
It's so gross. Anything that gross, a dog's going to like.
Yeah.
Want to eat it, roll around in it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just want to be in it 100%.
And yeah, so we did a week of that.
We brought him back and they said, yeah, it looks like we're going to have to pull the tooth.
So we can fit him in on this day, but let us know what you want to do.
So we talked it over and then we gave him like another week
so we could just like like alicia was here last week and we wanted her to be able to see him one
more time and um abby's parents were visiting for margo's birthday we wanted them to see him
one more time uh and then we had to decide like we don't want to do it on margo's birthday
And we had to decide, like, we don't want to do it on Margo's birthday.
No, that's probably a good call.
And then Margo's birthday party was on the Saturdays. So we didn't want to do it that day.
So we had to do it in between.
And, yeah, so we picked that day.
And I'm sure it's like, it's probably hard for people to hear this because they, you know, they, they just know him as this goofy dog that I had with a goofy name.
But, um, uh, and like you, he's my Twitter avatar and it hasn't changed like 12 years.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, uh, you just think of him as this four year old dog, but, uh, yeah.
You just think of him as this four-year-old dog.
But yeah, seeing him deteriorate over time was, it was not that sudden for us.
No, yeah. But yeah, so it would have been nice if the vet was like, this is your option.
You have to put him down.
But they really just put the ball in our court.
Yeah.
option you have to put them down but they really just put the ball in our court yeah but i mean i guess that's like maybe that's like something that vets have to do like they have to give you
the choice even if the choice is like you could spend fifty thousand dollars or um um so yeah it
was uh we we've like that the last few days were kind of hard to
hang out with him yeah because knowing what we knew and although he was like
he wasn't ever since he had his eye removed a few years ago and he went deaf and he just like
his activity went way down he sleeps so long like you couldn't really like the dog that you wanted to say
goodbye to wasn't there anymore yeah so yeah yeah it was just a weird like let's you know
go to dairy queen and give him a some some wet food from dairy some wet food an ice cream cone
yeah like just fed him all the the stuff he shouldn't have yeah um yeah so we uh yeah so that last few
days wasn't like meaningful time with him or anything no it's just like let's uh let's let's
have some people say goodbye to him if they want yeah i always wonder like, cause you know, dogs and cats, they say really pick up on, uh, body language and, uh, and that kind of thing.
I wonder if they sense something is about to happen.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Like, is it, or, you know, not that they would know what is going to happen, but they know that everyone's sad around them.
Yeah. All of a sudden people are petting him for longer or, you know, maybe tolerating his horrible farts.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's, it's, um, well, it was like he, because of this infection, there was like, his breath was so bad.
Yeah.
The last few days. And people were like, I'd love to give you like, like we're giving him a little hug and, uh, walk away and be like, he smells so bad.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like different than his normal bad smell.
It like sticks with you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I do wonder that like about death, death and dying in general is what is the smell situation um because you know
i like i feel like i i smell terrible after an eight hour plane ride i can't imagine days in a
and on a in a hospital yeah you know what i mean oh i do feel bad like you think of all these little
kids who are like i love animals i want to be a vet and you think about like how much of their job is just putting animals yeah yeah also being a vet lots of
school lots of school you gotta go to it's not the same it's not the same as being you know just
getting a bachelor's you gotta go get that extra time yeah yeah it's not just being a dog walker
yeah you want to be a dog walker is
what you want to be yeah or you want to be the person that's at uh you know marine land feeding
seals i think they have a lot of school too oh yeah oh maybe i guess i'm thinking of just like
the trainers yeah yeah i'm just thinking like somebody who goes in with a bucket of fish oh
the slot bucket guy yeah yeah yeah so on the day we went
to the vet and uh there's an empty parking lot we parked in and we were early so we gave him a nice
walk around yeah uh which we haven't done in years just like abby the dog and i walking around yeah of course walking around and so we um so that was very nice and like it's it
sucks when you're like he's like oh he's actually enjoying this walk he's really got to skip in his
step or spring in his step and it's like oh maybe we should yeah maybe but i guess what do you want
to like have his last day be a terrible day when he's dragging his body around.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, it's so hard.
Yeah, I mean, that's why they don't really book the day off.
Yeah.
But yeah, it's like.
Actually, could we get him in by two o'clock?
I have to get an acoustic guitar this afternoon.
Me and my dumb band Squeeze.
It's a weird thing to make an appointment for.
It's weird because then everything is counting down to that.
Well, it was also like, yeah, we have this appointment to have his tooth pulled.
We'd like to change that appointment.
Yeah.
Wow.
And they're very understanding about that.
And like, yeah, like just the whole process, because the people who work there, they must see a lot of people come in with their
yeah their pets that are they know they're gonna put them down so that's gonna be very
well we go so we walked them and we went in and uh they have it they've got a procedure for it so
like you we had decided what we wanted to do already like but they have options of like
do you want to get the ashes back do you want like a paw print the plate that we can make for you
right oh well and we were like we've had plenty of opportunities to make this yeah we took
a hundred thousand pictures of him yeah that's true. He's a very well documented dog.
Yes.
But you go in,
you pay up front
so you can just leave
when you're done. You don't have to
be weeping while you're
Oh my div, it's not working.
It's not a tap.
And also, if it didn't work,
if the payment didn't go through,
would they be like, okay, well get out of here yeah yeah yeah um we can get you to wash some dishes in the back
yeah um yeah i don't uh yeah i guess in in that way it's very much like the same kind of procedures
that like a funeral home would yeah yeah so you go in with
him and they've got like a bunch of urns if you would like him uh if you would like to get the
ashes back and they've got the the paw print plate on display uh and then you you can decide
we had already decided but they were like just in case you change your mind here's here are the options that mother of pearl urn looks really good yeah uh but we went with just uh
we're not going to spread the ashes anywhere no uh no it's okay yeah yeah yeah i mean
yeah some people would want to i guess you know and um yeah and and like uh i imagine there's people who would like
you know there are there's like pet cemeteries oh totally you know people would buy a headstone
yeah um spooky what i know about pet cemeteries spooky spooky stuff yeah and they're spelled
wrong they spell with an s well that's the one that you don't go in. Oh, is that right? Yeah, that's how you know.
Huh.
So I, yeah, so we went and they give him a shot to just knock him out.
Yeah.
And they give him another shot to stop his heart.
And we were there like right next to him and it was very fast and very smooth. And we were crying.
Of course.
And then we walk out and say goodbye.
And because they let you like stay in the room with him as long as you want okay we were like we don't really want to be around a
like it very seemed very much like the separation between a live dog and a dead dog like yeah
yeah it seemed like okay well we've we've gotten everything we need to out of being in this room.
Yeah.
And so we left and we were crying and Abby was like, well, let's go back to the car and I get it if you don't want to drive right now.
We can just stay in the car.
And by then the parking lot that was empty when we got there was so full.
Right.
And I was like, I am not going to just cry in a parking lot in front of everyone.
Yeah. fall right and i was like i am not gonna just cry in a parking lot in front of everyone yeah so let's drive somewhere find somewhere like secluded that we can go make out
that we can go cry let's go to crying point yes weepers plane yeah um and then uh i drove
a couple blocks found a spot and and by that point it had passed it was like
losing a sneeze right yeah that's the funny thing about a cry yeah once your mind goes into the
driving safe driving yeah you're just like well i'll see you later and it will it'll come up at
the weirdest time yeah yeah, yeah, exactly.
So, yeah, now it's very weird to be in a house without a dog.
Because it's been not only this house, but previous houses.
Well, we didn't go back to the other house to see if he was there.
No, but he's been with you through so many life changes. And there's like a place he would always sleep um right by the stairs
and just passing by there and not smelling a fart yeah it's very strange do you want me to sit there
and fart no i'm good like yours are not the like his were special mine are special no not to me
uh and just like you would hear his nails on the wood floor yeah yeah and you and
sometimes i'll hear like a button in the washing machine sure clicking and i'm like oh oh that's
not that sound so it's it's a little bit of just like withdrawal yeah right now but it's phantom
dog phantom dog but it's it's nice to not have to worry about what's
like any poo in the backyard yeah yeah what what are your uh kids do they they are no help at all
they because they never cared about him at all right they were he was an old piece of furniture by the time they were up and interacting with the world.
Right.
And so, but then the day, like, as we were about to leave, Marco goes, are you taking
Grandpa to the vet?
And he's going to go to sleep and never come back?
And we were like, what are you doing to us?
Like, we had explained what was happening.
Yeah.
But they were, and they were like
okay sure but then they're now they're just like torturing us like poppy every day now poppy says
where's grandpa and we'll say he's he's you know where he is and she says yeah he died
jeez thanks kids yeah so thanks for that um but uh yeah so it was very hard uh and we haven't
put anything on the internet yet at the time of recording this right so but yeah i think abby's
going to so thank you to everyone who will have written nice things sure Sure. Um, and yeah, he was,
he was the best dog and I really,
uh,
like we had,
I've never really owned a dog. We had one in my family for about a year.
Yeah.
Growing up and just having them for 15 years and,
uh,
walking them every day and like his routine of every morning he used to sleep on the floor and
then at five in the morning he'd wake me up to
go outside.
Yeah.
And then he'd hop in our bed and spoon with me
until I got up.
And then we,
he had so much energy before,
like.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He was a real rascal.
He would play at the,
but he'd chase down his Frisbee for an hour every
day.
And he like, we used to have to take him for the vet because his, he would play, he'd chase down his frisbee for an hour every day. And he, like, we used to have to take him to the vet because his, he would just, like, go too hard.
He would throw at his shoulder, like, exercising too hard.
That's what Grandpa and I share.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And, like, if you listen to the earlier episodes of this show, we talk about him always.
When the guests got here, he had these like large stuffed animals
that he would bring out and hump in front of the guests.
That's right.
Yeah.
He was a real horndog.
The floor show, he called it.
And then he would just chew on them for hours and just like knead,
like a cat kneading dough, just massaging yeah his stuffed animals i remember that but he
was yeah so he was so sweet and charming and he was like great around other dogs and if there were
dogs fighting he would get in the middle and just like lie on his back and show everyone his belly
yeah check this out guys such a cool calming temperament yeah he was so dumb like he never
missed the chance to drink seawater um but yeah he was just a sweet wonderful dog and uh
yeah we miss him yeah oh yeah some too if you um, if you want to like look at pictures of them or anything,
there's a ton on my Instagram on Abby's Instagram,
which is Abby Shumka,
I think.
And,
uh,
Abby used to run this Tumblr that was everybody loves grandpa.tumblr.com.
Grandpa is spelt G-R-A-M-P-A.
Uh,
and I was looking through those and there's like literally tens of thousands
of pictures yeah yeah yeah like it was very well as well documented as josh akabor yes he had a
wonderful life and he was well loved for uh all of it and uh yeah it's uh it's sad but
and if you have a pet out there, you know, go play with it.
Yeah, go squeeze it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, yes, this concludes the sad portion.
Yeah, it was very well said, though.
Very, yeah.
And I'm sorry.
I'm glad that you guys are okay.
And, you know, I know that that's a very, like, it's a very hard thing to do.
And no matter what the stage is, it's a very hard thing to do and no no matter what the stage is it's a very
hard thing to do so thank you um uh what what's uh what's up what's going on with you uh i uh
i had to end also how are you gonna maneuver out of this um watch me uh i uh had to travel to canada's east coast again again this
time to new brunswick right uh which is a province i had never been to before really yeah you have
you been no okay all right i've haven't been i. I've only been to Nova Scotia of our easternmost provinces.
Yeah.
I'm slowly making my way through them.
What have you been to?
You've been to PEI.
No.
PEI I've never been to.
Been to Newfoundland.
Been to Nova Scotia.
Have you been to Labrador?
I have not been to Labrador.
But you've been to Newfoundland and Labrador.
Yeah.
And I've been to now New Brunswick.
Uh-huh.
And it's-
What else is left?
PEI?
PEI.
That's it.
Yeah.
And maybe someday.
Maybe someday I'll get to see the red sand that they have.
The red dirt that they have.
Dirt.
Yeah.
Mud red.
They've got red dirt and they've got potatoes.
They grow potatoes in their red dirt And they've got potatoes They grow potatoes
In their red dirt
Yeah
Are the potatoes red?
Maybe
They've got red dirt
And green gables
They've got green gables
And
That
Those are the two big things
They've got
Maybe lobster
I feel like everybody
Out there has lobster
Yeah
Is Stompin' Tom Connors
From there?
Nobody did write
A song called
Bud the Spud bud the spud by
the spud right yeah red mud um yeah no i'm where's stomping tom from all over uh i think he's from
all over i was reading his wikipedia page and he left home at 13.
And he left home at 13.
Well, he was from Charles Dickens time.
Yeah.
But just like he was, he wasn't from a time when that would happen.
No.
Yeah.
But he was the type of guy that that would happen too.
Yeah.
Was he born in the twenties, thirties?
Yeah.
Cause he died in 2006 or something.
Am I going to Stompin' Tom's Wikipedia page?
Absolutely, you are.
I mean, it's already my homepage.
Mm-hmm.
He, for listeners who may. 1936, so he left home in 1949 1949 weird yeah yeah and he like uh it was just
like this very colorful red potato yeah yeah he was just a real strange character and the reason
that he's called stomp and tom is he brought a' Tom is he brought a board. But before he brought a board, he used to kick a hole
through whatever stage he was playing.
And then in,
I think it was in Peterborough, somebody was like,
you better bring a board.
Like, you're not kicking a hole into my stage.
And it was just a waiter
in Petersborough that gave him that nickname.
He was just Tom Connors before.
And the waiter was like,
what about Tom Stompin' Connors?
And then he was like, nope, close.
It's a good, like, it would be a good wrestling nickname.
Yeah.
He could have been a wrestler.
I think.
Yeah.
He probably, he had kind of, he was kind of Canada's Forrest Gump.
He kind of was.
Bunch of jobs.
And then wrote songs about every one of them.
Yeah.
And he wrote a lot of songs about
specifically about canada about well his most famous song is about hockey yep and then he's
got you know songs about drinking your sudbury saturday nights yep and uh he had drove his own
tour bus and uh he was when conan did like a week of shows from toronto he was the
musical guest uh and i'm sure he had no idea who conan o'brien was or what was you know it's just
another gig he he returned his junos that he won because he didn't feel that they represented Canada Oh Good for him Yeah he didn't fuck around
I'd like to see past guests Dave Merhaj and Ivan Decker
Return their Junos
Do we have any other past guests that have Junos?
Maybe Steve Bays
Maybe Steve Bays maybe Craig Northey
Yeah maybe
Hoxley
Workman yeah maybe
yep um look at our
catalog they're they're
all they're all
deserving yep yep uh
but yeah uh so went
out to the but they
don't represent Canada
for whatever or
whatever or whatever
reason anyway you
went to New Brunswick
the birthplace of
Stomp-a-Domp Connors.
Is that where he's born?
Well, according to his Wikipedia.
A lot of people, or by reputation, New Brunswick is like they say, it's the drive-thru province.
Or that it's that.
And I guess maybe it was like 20 years ago or something.
Is it an island?
Or is it attached to land?
I think it's attached to land and,
uh, but it's on the coast.
Sorry to my grade three teacher,
social studies teacher.
But,
uh,
a lot of people say that it was not a pretty place.
It's very nice.
Yeah.
It's a,
you know, this time of year, the foliage, changing colors, gorgeous.
Yeah.
Sweet November.
But as is the case with a lot of these small towns or smaller towns, I was going to the town called St. John.
That's the birthplace of Stompin' Tom Connors.
St. John, New Brunswick. Mm-hmm. going to uh the town called saint john that's the birthplace of stomping tom connor's saint john
new brunswick um it uh is uh like i guess maybe it was manufacturing at some point
they still have plants there um that are like uh mccain foods yeah mcc Foods. I think there's like a Popsicle warehouse.
You know, like Popsicle brand Popsicles.
Oh, boy.
What if the power goes out?
It'll be a flood.
It's well insulated.
But like everybody there is like super duper friendly.
So walking down the street, like people are not only saying hello,
but they're like trying to engage you in some sort of banter.
And Vancouver is very,
not like that.
No.
And I'm from Calgary,
which is kind of middle ground in that way.
Like you will say hello to somebody when you pass by them,
but you don't
engage in some sort of right well you're not from around here and do do do do do do
yeah yeah i heard a lot of that but i first of all i didn't i kind of didn't clock that of course i
don't have a maritime accent and so everybody knows that i'm not from there can you do a maritime accent uh no i mean
i know they say bye for as in like fella yeah and uh they say car for car yeah bye bye is boy
yeah but they call someone that you would call your friend a bye a bye yeah and uh
A bye.
A bye.
Yeah.
And,
uh,
it's like buddy.
Yeah.
Yeah. Like buddy or man.
Um,
but,
uh,
they say,
um,
uh,
D diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly diddly didd the cruise the cruise ships park at St. John and everybody gets off
so the
the town also was
flooded with
people from
Boston
oh yeah
yeah
so a lot of
a lot of fun accents
going on
where do I get
the popsicles
where's your popsicles
show me your historic
popsicle factory
and yeah like i went and ate uh dinner at a place
and then the what's the uh vegetarian situation it was really good yeah there was a a vegetarian
restaurant like right near the hotel so you were there for the debaters. I'm assuming. Yeah. Yeah. CBC radios,
the debaters.
Um,
and I,
so he ate at this vegetarian restaurant and then the,
the waiter was like instantly clocked me as an out of towner and started
giving me the rundown.
Trying to get your names.
You should call your beardy Graham Clark.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Big city Clark.
Um, you should call your beardy graham clark yeah yeah yeah big city clark um he gave me so many
recommendations of things to do and then i didn't ask i didn't say like oh boy what am i gonna do
like he he said what are you gonna do with the afternoon i was like i don't know go back to the
hotel and nap yeah uh but he said go check out the new brunswick museum and i was like all right so i did my friend works
there yeah i went to the new brunswick museum and there were entire exhibits where i was the only
person there just walking through there was no guards there was nobody saying don't touch
things you touched them i touched a bunch of stuff
a bunch of boats what's in their boats yeah there's a whole exhibit about boats exhibit about
whales ah uh the boats of the natural world sure and um a cod uh yeah there was some stuff about
fishing there was some stuff about i skipped over the minerals section. Oh, Graham, you fool.
That was my, when I went to, um, uh, when I was like 12 and I went to Drumheller, Alberta to the, uh, dinosaur museum.
Yes.
A lot of minerals in that too.
Cause they're, they're focused on like the, you know, the levels of.
Sediments. Sed sediment and shale and and it's like and kids who love jurassic park just came out kids are dinosaur
crazy yeah let's learn about shale but at least teach me about amber yeah the uh i think there's
a lot of space in a museum you got to fill it up somehow
uh so why not a room full of rocks easy easy to maintain you know
you know there's more where that came yeah because i feel like in museums a lot of times they fill
out space with like a giant diorama right and um those can either be really great
or they just don't age very well you know you can tell like boy this was made when plaster was really
yeah in in demand um so uh you know room full of rocks is easy that's timeless you never have to change that display well every million years or so yeah and uh then
i went up into the there's like an art gallery on top of it so the two floors were museumy stuff
and the top floor was an art gallery and there was a i was the only one up there and then there
was a woman up there who i think i don't know know why, but she thought I was a docent.
She just kept asking me questions like, who is this guy?
And I'm like, oh, I don't know.
I don't work here.
And then another couple of minutes would pass, and she'd yell from another room, like, what is this award that is?
Who, me?
Yeah.
And she took pictures Of every
Painting
She would just
Walk like
Take a picture
Walk two feet
Take another picture
Walk two feet
This is how I want my house
I want paintings
On every
I want pictures of boats
A lot of pictures of boats
Oh sure
A lot of paintings of boats
A lot of paintings
Of people
That were In charge of boats I mean They're pretty of boats a lot of paintings of people that were
in charge of boats i mean they're pretty easy to paint like even as a kid yeah draw yeah a little
like a little u-shape yeah line on top triangle yeah sails yeah there is uh you know that the
one that's on the wall of the simpsons house. Yep. Yeah. That was there.
That was in this museum.
Wow.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
A graining.
But I think, like, I quite like the museum.
But when you're by yourself, there's not the feeling like you have to kind of hang around
and you can just walk right through the exhibit.
It's very freeing.
Yeah.
Like, you just kind of walk right through.'re like i get it boats yeah i get it room do i care about boats
i don't yeah there's a big you know big model boat little model boat yeah uh paintings of boats
there's a in in stockholm i think we went to this boat museum that's literally just
about this one boat uh that was very what's the story with this boat i'm gonna get this wrong but
i think it was just like a very um like ambitious boat that they had built and it sank in two
minutes or something and so they pulled it up and built a museum around it.
And it's very cool.
You can get.
Oh, that's cool.
The boat never got to live its destiny as a boat, but is now a museum.
Yeah.
Huh.
Like when they make a restaurant out of a train car.
When I was a kid, I went to a restaurant that used to be a boat
Oh a boat
Boat-staurant
And I think the novelty
I want to say wore off in 12 seconds
Awfully cramped in here
Yeah
Lots of anchors and such on the wall
I get it
But yeah
So it just kind of really breezed through the museum yeah that was pretty that was
a nice treat um unless you like unless it's you know a fancy 35 museum oh no that was the other
thing 10 bucks nice yeah but i also for some reason i thought that there was a museum dedicated
to potatoes in this town and i looked it up and there was a museum dedicated to potatoes in this town. And I looked it up and there is a museum dedicated to potatoes, but it wasn't in St. John.
Oh, where is it?
It's kind of like in a small, like that's what the town's claim to fame.
Oh, what is it?
What goes on there?
I don't know, but I really wanted to go.
I think it was called the World of Potatoes.
Is it like, oh, I bet it's everything potato.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fries, mashed chips the shape that like oh this one kind of looks cool oh this one's
folded over yeah yeah yeah this one uh yeah it kind of looks a little bit like winston churchill
and then you know famous the the munchies guys are there when you got the munchies nothing else will do um
you know who else is a famous potato mr pringle mr pringle i mean uh tom has a whole wing for
ireland yeah yeah uh a whole section about the famine um yeah i don't uh know i have no idea
what was in it but i wanted to go and I was super bummed out to find out
that it wasn't.
Well, just take another.
How long was your flight?
Uh, it was a two flights, two flights, five hours to Toronto.
And then, yeah.
And then coming back, uh, my flight got delayed.
So I missed my connection.
So that was five hours in the airport.
Uh, yeah.
14 hours of traveling yesterday.
Yesterday?
Yeah, yeah.
Worth it.
All my troubles seem so far away.
Boy, if you had an extra five hours,
you should have that five-hour layover in New Brunswick.
Then you could go to that potato museum.
How big an island is it?
Could you have driven?
I bet you.
How big an island is it?
How's that oh no
you got the you got the accent you could pass how big an island by that's pretty good boat uh
um i uh i don't know but the the uh it's enough it's a small enough place that a lot of the cabbies only take cash
and that there's a lot of restaurants that are cash only which is something you don't see
in the bigger centers right and the places here that are cash only mention it five times before
you sit down yeah yeah whereas this is a town where there was a lot of still, still cash.
Yeah.
Um, and also the cab that I got from the airport had been smoked in pretty thoroughly.
Was it a big smoking town?
Uh, I didn't see very many people smoking, but that was, if I only based it just on the
car ride, I'd be like, wow, New Brunswick loves cigarettes it's weird they yeah it's it's if they had discovered canada
the other way like from west to east yeah like you and i might live in different provinces
yeah even though we're just a few blocks away. That's true.
Like they really overestimated how or underestimated how big the country was going to be.
Yeah.
We need to make all these small provinces.
And then just all of a sudden they make a huge. Because our New Brunswick values are so different from the PEI values.
That's a really good point.
That we can throw a rock to.
that's a really good throw a rock too and it's the same in the states with all the like there's like you know three states along the west coast and 13 along the east coast i never
thought about that that's crazy but yeah of course because everybody was like well this is as much as
oh shit this destiny is pretty much manifested um yeah so it was a it's a really it's
a nice town really pretty lots of old buildings there was a church for sale never seen that before
how much uh i guess i didn't ask you didn't go on redfern.com or whatever. That's a movie. But yeah, I've never seen that before.
And their main street is super steep, which is another thing.
Because usually main streets, pretty level.
Yeah.
Not theirs.
It's like out of breath steep.
Wow.
Yeah.
Which is hard when what you're going for is the subway.
Yeah.
Which is hard when what you're going for is the subway.
And it's hard because you wear those Healy shoes.
So you keep slipping down the hill.
It's true.
But that's my own doing.
So I can't blame that on New Brunswick.
No.
But yeah.
And also, this is a thing that I've noticed.
Uh-oh.
Here it comes.
Here comes your racist rant.
Is that it seems like the smaller the town, the more detailed the airport bag searches.
Oh.
I feel like I breeze through a bigger city airport.
They just throw it through the x-ray machine.
But then small towns, they're pulling everything out and going deep.
I don't know why that is.
Do they think that I think that their point of entry is a weak spot?
Yeah, and you're trying to exploit it?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Is that that they're like, well, we're the- My point of entry is a weak spot.
I'll have you know.
Thank you very much, sir.
I get, every time I travel for the podcast,
I get a secondary search in my bag
because the recorder we use,
I don't know why,
I use two pieces of equipment
that they've never seen before
and they need me to explain.
Right.
But one of them is the recorder. It's a Zoom H4n. Nice. two pieces of equipment that they've never seen before and they need me to explain right uh but
one of them is the recorder it's a zoom h4n nice uh and they they've never told me why
but they always have to look at it and they say what is this and i say it's an audio recorder
and they go up and like look under it think as if they're gonna see and then they lift up their shirt what is this that's a third nipple uh and then this most recent time going through calgary the guy said
oh it looks like a taser oh so that's why it gets pulled aside i'm not allowed to taser on a plane
yeah since when yeah yeah uh the thing that because this backpack that i that i had with me i also you know
i give away stuff every week at the laugh gallery sometimes uh there's a silly there was a lot of
silly stuff in my bag like traveling with carrot top yeah there was a and the thing that they ended
up looking for was a little race car they thought that it was a knife but it was a, and the thing that they ended up looking for was a little race car.
They thought that it was a knife, but it was a little race car.
Yeah.
So it was very standing there watching them pull out all this silly stuff.
That was kind of fun.
Yeah.
You know, there was the regular stuff, your toothpaste, the toothbrush and whatnot.
Yeah. Your, your gallons of water that you didn't know you weren't allowed to bring on.
I didn't see a sign anywhere.
I haven't,
I haven't heard the news or seen a standup comedian in the last 15 years.
Um,
and yeah,
then,
uh,
also I flew in a middle seat.
Oh,
Graham,
all the way back,
all the way back.
Um,
and I,
I think the rules are,
and I'm pretty sure is that middle seat you get the armrest yeah
yeah the guy on the guy on my left side had not got that memo no they never do yeah the woman on
my right she seemed to she knew right away she was she adjusted and uh by the guy on my left i
think we were touching elbows the whole five hours back. So touching elbows.
He didn't just take the hint.
He was like,
I'm not giving up this.
Yeah.
I'm not seeding this territory.
Yeah.
Like he's playing risk,
but he watched the live action version of Aladdin.
I was like,
Oh,
he's dumb.
Oh,
I get it.
He's a stupid person.
He's just a stupid guy.
So that's fine.
It is cool. How you can just like pick a thing to judge someone on.
And you're,
you can,
any conclusion you come to is completely validated if you already don't like
them.
Yeah,
exactly.
And it's,
uh,
you know,
I'm not in charge of a court of any sort.
Uh,
so it's just going on in your head.
Yeah.
I'm just like guilty of being
a dumb.
And yeah.
So you know what?
If you happen to be
on the east coast
of North America
Yeah.
Stop into New Brunswick.
Why not?
Yeah.
Take a cruise ship
up from Boston
where you parked
your car
in the yard
of Harvard.
Go see that popsicle factory Gotta see the popsicles
Gotta have them popsicles
Gotta have my pops
Is Popsicle Pete still a guy?
I don't know
I'm not sure what that is
You
Is this not
Have we not talked about it on this show?
I guess not
Popsicle Pete was In my youth He might have been like There On this show I guess not Popsicle Pete was
In my youth
He might have been like
There might be
Different eras of Popsicle Pete
But
Okay
Popsicle Pete in my youth
Was a superhero
Whose body was a popsicle
Okay
And his legs
Were two popsicle sticks
Oh good
Cause I was thinking
That the popsicle stick
Would be like
Look like a wiener
No no
It's the
It's the guy
It's the
The kind you break in half on the countertop.
Oh, yeah, yeah. On the edge of the countertop.
Popsicle classic. Yeah. And he's got
human arms. Right.
And popsicle stick legs, I think.
And.
I do not, yeah, this does not ring a bell.
And then you suck him. Yeah.
Until you've. Until completion.
Until you can read the answer to the riddle
that was written on his leg right yeah
yeah um yeah i don't i remember i don't remember being advertised popsicles like i remember just
like wanting them yeah like the perfect perfect product really it really is. Because, you know, what's the environmental impact?
It's just a stick.
It's just a stick, man.
And the wrapper.
Oh, yeah, that wrapper.
But there must have been a time when there were no wrappers.
I feel like the wrappers were papery before.
Yeah, that's right.
Like a waxy paper.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Now they're maybe even plastic.
Come on, Popsicle.
Go back to the old days. Yeah. Now they're maybe even plastic. Come on, Popsicle. Go back to the old days.
Yeah.
Make Popsicle great again.
And my favorite thing when I was a kid was the, you would get a Popsicle that was supposed
to look like a pop culture thing.
And it would look, it just looked like a smushed.
Yeah.
Like an amateur made it.
Yeah.
Like a picture, like a child's drawing of a boat
yeah it would be like a ghostbuster symbol and you'd be like with gumballs for eyes
they still do that oh yeah yeah spongebob minions yeah the spider-man um yeah but uh popsicles
number one man best yeah What was your favorite?
Like a rocket?
Oh, rocket pop is great.
I still have memories of, there was this store that was right by my elementary school, and
you could either spend your 65 cents that your parents gave you for the bus on bus fare,
or you could stop at the store and get stuff.
Or...
Like, not much. No. But you could stop at the store and get stuff. Or. Like, not much.
No.
But you could.
Because there was never a time in our lives when 65 cents was a lot of money.
You could maybe buy a bag of chips.
Maybe.
And maybe.
Yeah.
Maybe.
Like.
But it wasn't like you couldn't, like, buy a kazoo, then go to the movies.
No.
Yeah.
And buy a bunch of flowers for your mom.
Like.
No.
But you could.
If you took a couple days worth of walking home, you could save up.
Yeah, you could buy something nice.
Or if your parents gave you $5 to buy a hot lunch, then, well, I mean, I didn't use it all.
Yeah.
But my favorite Popsicle, and I think I only ever got it once, was root beer.
Yeah. But I still think about it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Root beer Popsicle, and I think I only ever got it once, was root beer. Yeah.
But I still think about it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Root beer Popsicle, out of this world.
Also, I remember going to the zoo and them having, you know, it was like candy sticks.
Uh-huh.
Like.
Pixie sticks?
Not pixie sticks, but like they're like.
Honey sticks?
uh pixie sticks not pixie sticks but like they're like sticks they're kind of yeah like uh um they're like what the candy would have been in the old west like a peppermint stick okay oh yeah
yeah and there was a candy cane that's not okay yeah yeah yeah and it was i remember the root
beer one and i remember going to the zoo the next time thinking about the root beer thing the whole
time and then uh like begging
to go to the gift shop they didn't have it no they had it but you know really missing out on what the
zoo had to offer because i was just thinking about this delicious and did but did it did you get you
got it i got it and was it good oh i thought you were gonna say it just never lived up to your fantasy. No, no, no. I still think about it.
It's, uh,
that's the thing about kids is, like,
you could buy them the really expensive
thing, but really, like, the cheap thing,
they will, that'll do.
Yeah, absolutely. Always remember
that. If your kid's like, I want
this thing, be like, here, I'll buy you a sticky
hand that goes on the wall this is 50 cents i'll take it i'll take it and i'll play with it
four years yeah
i'll find it when i'm leaving for college i'll bring it with me yeah yeah fun fun memory of
the past but give it to my kids.
Do we want to move on to a little bit of business?
Yeah.
Oh, hey, everybody.
Did you know that Stop Podcasting Yourself is brought to you by ZipRecruiter?
Yes, it is. Okay.
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There's nothing quite like sailing
in the calm international waters
on my ship, the SS Biopic.
Avast! It's actually pronounced Biopic.
No, you dingus! It's Biopic!
Who the hell says that? It's Biopic.
It's the words through biography and picture.
Alright, that is enough.
Ahoy! I'm Dave Holmes.
I am the host of the rebooted podcast
formerly known as International Waters,
designed to resolve petty but persistent arguments like this.
How?
By pitting two teams of opinionated comedians against each other
with trivia and improv games, of course.
Winner takes home the right to be right.
What podcast be this?
It's called Troubled Waters,
where we disagree to disagree
overheard a segment where uh boy oh boy there's so many great things that you can hear out there
in the world and uh you trap them in your brain and then you let them free
here on the podcast and we always like to start with the guests.
Aww.
I guess no guests.
But, so we'll start with you, James.
Sure.
Mine is an overseen.
This is outside Margo's classroom.
So Margo's in elementary school now.
Kindy.
Gart.
Gart.
And it was a picture. It was a someone had written graffiti and this i witnessed
this on the first week of school yeah written graffiti right outside on a sort of post right
outside her kindergarten that just says kid prison you know wow i wonder if that was like
is that a kid trying to signal to the world?
Or is that someone's nickname?
I'm Kid Prison.
Good rapper name.
Kid Prison.
Lil Prison.
Lil Prison, yeah.
Yeah, I mean, they are.
I mean, you get to leave at the end of the day, but very much it is, here's an institution you must spend time in as a kid.
It's weirdly, yeah, it's weirdly, no one is shackling you.
Not anymore.
They feel like there was a time when they were allowed to hit you or something.
Definitely.
Yeah.
But also like you're not, like your parents make you go yeah and your
teachers make you stay yeah no one is physically holding you there no but if you leave you're
gonna get in trouble yeah you have to do time in solitary um my i think, not my junior high, but I think my high school was designed by a firm that also designed prisons.
Oh, sure.
And if you saw it, you would be like, oh yeah, that, that definitely looks, it could be a prison.
Yeah.
What, what era?
Like what era building?
Was it a new building when you went to school?
No, no, it would have been from like the 60s.
Yeah, I guess like, yeah, I was thinking like, oh, because like modern, I don't know what modern prisons look like.
Yeah, that's a good question.
I don't know what modern prisons look like either.
I guess they're just very big concrete buildings.
Yeah.
Square-ish.
But old-timey prisons look a lot like old-timey schools.
Like, you know, the Shawshank, uh, redemption prison.
Shawshank.
Yeah.
Uh, it looks like it could be, you know, the school you went to.
Yeah.
Particularly the school yard was like a lot of gravel.
There's a lot of, and that I feel like that same kind of thing cement and then basketball hoops like it
looks very much like a prison yard yeah there's often a fence there's often a little kid pumping
iron there's very there's a lot of your drop tattoo just because you cried in front of your
friends it means something different uh going dropping margo off at her school, there is a lot.
There are like, I forgot how many kind of versions of hopscotch there are.
Oh, yeah.
There's like one that's a spiral.
Right.
There's ones that are just like, use your imagination.
You could also, that's why kids can draw their own hopscotch on the ground.
Yeah.
And make any shape you want.
I never, I think there was like a three
week period in grade six where we're like oh is this like technically a sport yeah yeah this is
athletic yeah and then you know kids are uh they're interested in things yeah and four square
like i only played four square for a few weeks and i loved it it's very cheap thing for a school
to do like i'll just paint
this thing on the ground and make kids but now kids just want to do spike ball yeah spike ball
they also want to do the backpack kid dance they want to floss yeah if they need peloton bikes
yeah kids love fuck kids love peloton uh they just want to participate in a uh in some kind of cycling class that's taking place
in new orleans yeah and they want to pay 2300 for a bike the uh when when that first came out
like that i was like uh isn't the whole purpose of having a bike at your house?
This would be the solitude.
Yeah, the solitude.
Yeah. Isn't that the whole buy-in?
Like, if you want to take a class, they have them.
They have them everywhere.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then they're like, yeah, but it's the convenience of a bike at your house with the horribleness of being in a class.
Of being yelled at by a very fit person.
That being said, never have I ever done a spin class.
I don't know.
Maybe it's great.
We're playing that drinking game?
No, never have I ever either. The only, oh boy, I don't think I've ever taken an organized fitness class of any kind except maybe prenatal yoga.
Yeah, I've done some prenatal yoga.
Good joke.
Yeah, I also did some prenatal weightlifting and I joined the prenatal jogging club.
I've done some prenatal yoga and some post malone yoga oh yeah and that's
why you have that barbed wire tattoo across your forehead because i'm always tired you're always
tired um yeah i definitely definitely yeah why did i say that i think i've got jeff daniels on
the brain oh yeah um and that happens you know when you watch uh enough of the
newsroom oh boy uh that show i've only seen two episodes and they were both hilarious oh no
funniest show on television yeah it was good it really like the the um the uh the ads for it made
it seem like oh this is an important show yeah yeah this is aaron sorkin soapboxing yeah aaron
soapbox over here um yeah a couple weeks ago uh as of when this podcast will come out a lot of people have been posting clips of the newsroom on twitter uh and man it is the funniest show not on purpose yeah what what
sticks out uh there's uh uh the season or the series finale okay uh there's a scene where uh
jeff daniels like jams with a garage band.
Yeah.
At a wedding or something?
Yeah.
But not ironically.
And the garage band's really into it.
And they start singing along and backing him up. And he's playing.
I believe he had just been on the cover of Guitar Aficionado magazine.
From the makers of Cigar Aficionado magazine from the makers of cigar aficionado yeah as a kid who grew up reading guitar magazines yeah this was not available to me cigar aficionado no guitar aficionado yeah
oh i read cigar oh yeah sure yeah who's cindy crawford was on the cover oh my god oh yeah
sure my friend's dadford was on the cover oh my goodness oh yeah sure my friend's dad
bob was on the cover once
the only cigar smoker i knew
um yeah it's funny to see somebody smoking a cigar in in modern times like outside of a group
of guys who are obviously at a wedding or bachelor party or whatever like
or in vegas or something but just like seeing a man out on the corner smoking a cigar you're like
well hey and where from what time did you arrive yeah like get me to your uh corner cigar dispensary
that being said i love the smell you love the smell of cigars? I love the smell of cigars. I love the smell of pipes.
I love the smell of pipes. Cigars
can go pound sand.
Yeah, they can pound sand.
Am I
over her? Please.
I was in St. John
New Brunswick in a
vintage store.
And a woman was talking to the store owner and she was looking
at a pair of boots and she said well these boots would really work for my current look but i'm
kind of thinking of switching over to androgynous alien
they got that they got that over there absolutely oh wow yeah her current look
was kind of country western but she was thinking of making the switch to androgynous oh yes sure
just like david bowie yes you gotta every couple of years you gotta switch it up you gotta keep
people guessing well you know what is uh sus to? Well, was it Susan Powder?
It was Susan Powder.
And she was trying to.
She's kind of an androgynous alien.
Yeah, she was trying to reinvent herself as a Peloton teacher.
Oh, I can see that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
She, I read an article about her recently.
Susan Powder?
Yeah.
By the way, she did not stop the insanity.
Things are getting insaner.
That's right.
I forgot that was her slogan.
Mm-hmm.
But she.
That was.
What else do you remember about her?
Her haircut.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And that.
She was very fit.
Was it a fitness program?
Yeah, it was a fitness program.
But it was also like a just eat uh regular foods don't don't go on a fad diet like just eat like a good salad and uh maybe a
soup you know but don't uh just eat broth right sure yeah don't go insane stop the insanity right
yeah she was not wrong um But I can't remember.
Like, I read an article about her.
Like, whatever happened to Susan Powder?
I can't remember what happened to her.
Sure.
She's got longer hair.
What happened to Ron Popeil?
He's still around.
Yeah.
Still rules.
Kicking it.
Yeah.
Spraying on hair and rotisserie-ing chickens.
Yeah.
Ronco's still going strong.
He's probably got a drawer of ideas that have never...
He's too old now, though.
He's an old dog.
When he dies, it'll be like Prince,
where they go and he's got all these products
that have been released that are not...
You know, because he was picky about what he released.
Well, Prince wasn't.
Prince was quite prolific.
But Prince apparently has... Yeah, he wrote picky about what he released. Well, Prince wasn't. Prince was quite prolific. But Prince apparently has...
Yeah, he wrote a million songs a day.
Yeah, decades and decades of material.
The Ron Popeil product, I think at a certain point they just licensed their name and bought up other people's ideas.
I mean, I like to think of him as a mad scientist inventor dehydrating food in his basement, but he probably just took other people's ideas and infomercialed them.
His first, like, the thing that put him on the map was the pocket fisherman.
Right.
And that was like a fold-up fishing pole.
And, you know, not like a great idea, but a great enough idea to put them on the map
i guess but you see yeah i still see the um the name ronco when i go through airport security
it's the brand of gloves that they that's right yeah they're just selling so many blue uh
selling so many blue latex gloves.
Yeah.
I can't wear them.
I got a latex allergy.
They, uh...
Ha, ha, ha.
Ha, ha, ha.
Oh, I got so many kids.
See you.
Ha, ha, ha.
Ha, ha, ha.
Um, now we also have overheard
sent in from people around the world.
If you want to send one in you can send it in to
SPY at MaximumFun.org
I knew a guy in college who
Had a latex allergy
Or so he said I think he just wanted to
Talk about condoms and
Said he had to use sheepskin condoms
Which are they really sheepskin
Or are they just made
Oh yeah well at one point
They were And who's like
letting you penetrate them with the gut of a sheep somebody's got it well so are they tied
off at the end like i don't know what i i was there a polyurethane foam he could spray on there? Yeah, yeah, like that ceiling foam?
Yeah.
And then you just wait.
He was a character, man.
He once went to a...
He described going to Virgin Megastore as visiting Mecca.
And he once referred to as a...
Was he a big Richard Branson thing? He once referred to going a uh was he a big richard branson thing he once referred to a
going to a tori amos concert as a religious experience wow this guy really was a character
yeah did it was he uh a musician-y guy he was an artsy guy an artsy guy yeah huh yeah like i never
i didn't ever live in residence so i never had that experience of just
like knowing to be around a random guy um but that's funny all kinds of random the most random
guys like do you have any idea what that guy's up to now no no just went off the grid following Tori Amazon tour.
Yeah, don't know.
Works at a Virgin Megastore.
These are leads I've gained.
Are there any more Virgin Megastores?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I mean, I thought there were no more HMVs.
You go to a mall and there's one cranking it out.
This first one comes from Phillip in Cleveland. There's one cranking it out.
This first one comes from Phillip in Cleveland.
I was in a bookstore and overheard a conversation between a little girl, maybe three or four, and an older man, maybe her grandpa.
The little girl wanted something from the store but couldn't pay for it. The grandpa went on a long rant about how she needed money if she wanted something, that she had to work for it.
Once the man was done talking, the girl responded, I don't need money because I'm cute.
It works.
Life lesson.
The sooner you learn it, the better off you'll be.
That's right.
That's what the whole model of this podcast is.
That's right.
And we're doing great.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The cuter we get.
No, it's please
donate to our podcast because we are not cute and it's not cute anymore um yeah it's like uh
who had the longest career being cute gary coleman longest career of being cute oh not danny bonaduce no uh what's her name uh
little kid black and white movies oh shirley temple shirley temple yeah i feel like the
culkin family oh yeah is coasting off of macaulay's early cuteness yeah but not macaulay himself
no the uh the olsen twins they have they quite a quite a run cute wise
they really did yeah they built quite an empire yeah out of just like being like two cute twins
too cute for you yeah um the jonas brothers still at it still at it still cute yeah i mean it's a renewable resource yeah yeah
if you treat it right it'll never run out but don't abuse it right exactly
because then anybody duchi yeah anybody duchi is our uh prodigal son
uh this next one comes from adrian in bedford massachusetts oh you gotta get the popsicles
construction worker in his 50s gruff looking guy heavy boston accent uh going to see a fucking
hoot is friday where fenway buddy got a whole orchestra in front of him and all that shit
gonna be playing tammy and all that shit
uh wife's gonna be driving home if you get what i'm getting at brother wow hooters
hooters uh the who oh yeah you're gonna go see the who at fenway they're gonna to be playing Tammy. Tommy. Oh!
I thought it was like the Philadelphia band,
The Hooters.
But, uh... I want to see The Who at Fenway Park.
All right, yeah.
Still original lineup of The Who?
No.
Two of them are dead.
Oh, okay.
No, I mean, yeah, of the surviving.
The surviving two, sure.
They're still at it.
It's not just one guy.
No, it's Pete and Roger.
Yeah.
They're still.
They might be, you know, a famous drummer's son is also maybe on drums.
Cool.
Zach Starkey or Jason Bottom or Ricky Moon.
Yeah, these kids today, that's all they know.
They only know the kids of these famous...
They know the kids of the drummers who also became drummers because they had drums in the house.
Yeah, and a famous drummer name.
So, why not?
If you're out there listening, you have a dad who's a famous drummer consider getting in the
family biz if any uh if simon collins is listening wouldn't that be funny if it was a kid of a rock
star and the kid's just like i want to own a corner store i'm not like you yeah accounting
has always spoken to me yeah i don't want to spend my life on tour,
drugs and rock and roll and such.
I watched a documentary about you, dad.
You're racist.
You never told me you did a racist rant.
Even the documentary didn't say how racist it was.
You were using words I've never even heard before.
I don't know if I'm allowed to repeat them because I don't know how,
what they pertain to. them um uh this final one comes from josh in uh north hampton uh it's in england uh
yeah maybe yeah is that in England? Maybe. Or Vermont.
I work in a pub that has live music nearly every weekend.
I was clearing the pub one day and found a set list from a band that played the previous night.
Oh, I love it.
Please bear in mind that these songs were performed at a wedding reception held at the pub.
The songs were Plushie Bukkake,
Quality Rolling Paper,
Mr. Backpack,
Ramp With Me Tings,
Regular Slinky, Good Good Ganja, ramp with meetings regular slinky good good ganja ids hello c word evening shatters and digging graves evening shatters that was the Burt Reynolds sitcom Right?
Fleshy Bukkake?
Yeah Fleshy Bukkake
Oh boy
That was the first dance
Yes
But that was the
Father
Fathered son
Whatever
Maybe
I follow an Instagram
Called Hockey Bukkake
It's very good
It's a lot of
Like trivia
And stuff
That's fun
It's a terrible name
Yeah
But you know what you don't
get to choose your instagram yeah that's true yeah you just assigned one at birth in addition
to overheards that are written in uh we also accept your phone calls my number my number
is not the dave hotline yeah you call the dave hotline. I want to talk to you now. I'm sexy and I'm so hot for you.
Bring over a popsicle or something.
In the meantime, call 1-844-779-7631.
That's one.
Ugh.
SpyPod 1, like these people have.
Hi, Dave.
Hi, Graham.
Hi, guest.
I'm going to hope that it's Paul F. Tompkins because he's pretty great.
But I'm sure if it's not, whoever's there is also great.
This is Adam from the New Hampshire Bumper calling in with an
overheard. I was walking down the street
yesterday, walking down the sidewalk
and I came upon
a mother and two children,
a boy and a girl, and
we were on a crosswalk and the boy
points to the lady and goes,
Hey, look, Mom, that's a new street lady.
And the daughter goes, Yeah, that's a new street lady and the daughter goes yeah that's a new street lady the mom goes kids she's called a
crossing guard the boy goes yeah but I'm gonna call her a street lady and the mom
very defeatedly just went no yeah I mean that kid for sure is just gonna call
that lady street yeah yeah yeah I mean until the kid for sure is just going to call that lady a street lady.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, until the other kids in class are like, who are you talking about?
You know, the street lady.
And then they're like, let's go make fun of her.
And then they'll all point at her, street lady, street lady.
Did you, at my daughter's school, they have, like, the older kids are at the crossing guards.
Oh, yeah.
Did you ever have to do that?
No.
Oh, we did it.
I thought it was a very big responsibility.
I mean, life's in your hands.
Yeah, that's true.
No, we didn't have that.
Going up.
You pretend your arm was a robot arm.
I don't think we had any crossing guards.
Too cold.
Yeah, it was too cold.
It was just freestyle.
Yeah.
Freestyle kid crossing every which way.
But yeah, maybe we should have.
There were roads.
And there were kids run over every day.
Yeah.
Huh.
Huh.
Huh.
Huh.
No solution presented itself.
Yeah.
Callers, if you want to not say the guests you wish we had,
that would help the guests we do have in general.
None this week, but it doesn't make anyone feel great.
And your batting average so far has been zero.
So let's try to avoid that.
Next phone call hi this is megan calling in from vancouver with an
overheard um my daughter was turning 10 and for her 10th birthday i took her to paris
and uh we were planning the trip and i um was telling her it's really great we're gonna arrive
in paris on bastille day and it's a big deal because there's a parade and it's a holiday for them.
And then I overheard her talking to my parents, so her grandparents,
and she was telling them, oh, it's going to be so awesome, we're arriving on Bastille Day.
It's going to be the best deals on croissants, the best deals on macaroons.
She thought it was Bastille Day and that we would save so much money,
which I thought was really cute.
You know what?
Probably, there's probably going to be a couple sales.
Yeah, probably.
Although those French,
they'll probably just take the days off.
They'll be like getting a croissant.
Yeah, the,
who goes to Paris for a 10-year-old birthday?
I mean,
I think I was told that I would be a crossing guard,
and that never materialized.
For my 10th birthday,
I believe I went to see Home Alone with my friend.
Nice.
Nice.
Yeah,
I mean,
fun.
It's better than Paris.
I've never been to Paris.
Actually, for my 10th birthday, we went to see Forget Paris.
Oh, the Billy Crystal class?
Starring Billy Crystal and Debra Winger.
That's as good.
Yeah.
He played an NBA referee.
He did?
I think so.
Was George Mirosan?
Did they make an early Billy Crystal Mirosan appearance?
No.
That's too bad.
Have you been to Paris?
Yes.
Is it good?
Yeah.
Yeah?
I'd like to go.
It's what the great poet Jim Morrison called City of Lights.
I visited his grave.
Yeah?
Pissed on it. Yeah, spit on grave. Yeah. Pissed on it.
Yeah, spit on it.
Yeah.
I mean, look, you did what you had to do.
I think I've been three times.
Really?
Well, yeah.
I think I went when I was, my family went when I was seven.
And then I think I went when we were 15.
When I was 15, we just went to France. and I think we went to Paris for a little while.
And then when I was 21,
I get no,
but I haven't been in so long.
So it just changed there.
It's probably all,
you know,
have a Euro Disney's California adventure now.
And,
uh,
yeah,
we never got to do any of the good stuff.
What is the good stuff eiffel tower
yeah no we did the we did we did eiffel tower uh although i remember once when i was 15
my dad was like oh there's this really famous restaurant that we should go to
and went with me and my sister and he wore like like, you know, a sport coat or whatever.
Yeah.
And I was like, can I just wear a t-shirt?
And he said, fine.
And we went.
And it was like literally the entire staff is wearing tuxedos.
And I'm wearing my Hootie and the Blowfish shirt.
Would you, Monsieur Hootie and the Blowfish shirt. Would you
Monsieur Hootie?
Here is Monsieur's
chicken fingers.
More ketchup.
And here's your final phone call.
Hey gang, this is Christian
from Seattle calling in with an overheard.
I was at the
cat shelter yesterday adopting kittens.
When you adopt kittens, they want
you to put them in the bathroom or a small
room and just let them get
used to your house in there for a while.
14-year-old boy on hearing
this... Boy, I'm so out of breath.
13-year-old boy on hearing
this news says to his dad,
what am I supposed to do in the bathroom for all that time
his dad says well bring your laptop in there
and watch Netflix for a couple hours
13 year old boy says
you guys are always telling me
not to bring my laptop in there for 2 hours
that's all
bye guys
that is probably a modern
teenage problem
like stop taking your computer into the bathroom.
Why?
I have business.
It's just a room.
I never thought about that until, because of course that's what a teenager would be doing.
Just like, hey, where's the tablet?
would be just like,
hey, where's the tablet?
As opposed to like my teenage years where it's like the family computer
is in a central place.
Yes, yes.
And it is immovable.
And if someone's on the phone.
Yeah.
There was no laptop.
There was, you couldn't,
you'd have to drag the computer
and the dial-up modem into the bathroom.
Yes, we had to, it was tough for us growing up.
We had to jack off uphill both ways.
Just that you would just see all these cables coming in from under the bathroom door and hear,
Beeeew!
Ahooga!
Oh, wow.
But also, what am I supposed to do in the bathroom with these kittens?
Play with the kitten.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's why we're getting you kittens.
That's a, I didn't know that.
I didn't know that you're supposed to, I don't know why the bathroom.
I guess so they're just not tearing everything up.
Yeah, the door closes.
It's easy. It's washable. Yeah. So they're just not tearing everything up. Yeah, the door closes. It's easy.
It's washable.
Yeah.
It's true.
Just hose her down.
Yeah.
But yeah, like, is it the same with a puppy?
Because that would be great.
Great.
Two hours in the bathroom with a puppy.
No.
Hooray.
They, yeah, they, you know, you're supposed to like keep, I mean, it's more just, uh, from a, like keeping your rugs and carpets alive.
Yeah.
That's right.
Just keep them in a, in a place where they, they won't make too big of a mess.
Do that thing with a puppy where you hold them near a faucet and then they start pretending that they're swimming.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's the best.
They learn it in the womb.
Cats don't do that
though they just freak out if you put yeah near a faucet um and this has been cat and dog talk
um well that brings us to the end of the episode yeah have a good october everybody
yeah the spooky one go see the joker uh don't be influenced by it to become a spooky guy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just enjoy the story of a spooky guy like, you know, like Jack Skellington.
That's what this month is for, is to celebrate the creeps and weirdos.
You celebrate the pumpkin.
Yeah.
You spice it up.
Everyone have a pumpkin spice latte on me.
Tell them Dave sent you.
Yeah, and, you know, go sit in a pumpkin patch.
Wait for the great pumpkin to arrive.
And also watch Autumn in New York with Winona Ryder and Richard Gere.
Oh, yeah.
Treat yourself.
You know what?
Treat yourself to any of the Richard Gere films.
Yes.
I'm talking Runaway Bride.
Pretty Woman.
Officer and a Gentleman. Officer and a Gentleman a gentleman officer and a gentleman and faithful too steamy uh very steamy but keep you warm in this uh brisk october weather
arbitrage the arbitrage what's the one that it's not a richard gear movie it's that french movie but it's about like a ski
disaster it's got a name similar to arbitrage until i find out it doesn't oh yeah hermitage
i want to say it is called oh we can't end the episode no no let's see getting close no if i googled french ski movie french ski movie huh oh boy um
i don't even know hot dog the movie yeah hot dog the movie that was the one you were thinking was
you thinking of ski school was it eddie the eagle was it the movie starring uh alan thick and jim carrey that i watched recently from 1981
well this is a terrible way oh it's force majeure force majeure not a richard gear but still a
class but it's like it's a it's so close to arbitrage yes um and uh thank you all for
listening uh if you like the show
tell your friends
or you know what
you leave a review on iTunes
say Richard Gere brought me here
rhymes, it's fun
and everybody
have a good day
and come on back next week
for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself.
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