Stuff You Should Know - Selects: How Satanism Works
Episode Date: June 4, 2022Satanism may be the most misunderstood "religion" in the world. Part of that is because there are, and have been, many offshoots of Satanism, from The Church of Satan to The Satanic Temple. One thing ...is sure though, none of them are filled with evil humans who perform ritual blood sacrifice and worship a cloven-hoofed devil. Learn all about Satanism in this classic episode.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Hey everyone, Josh here and for this week's Select, I've chosen our 2017 episode on Satanism.
It proved to be a pretty eye-opening episode and was much less upsetting and much more enjoyable
than the title might suggest. So sit back, relax, and listen up to how Satanism works.
Hey everybody, it's us, Josh and Chuck, and we just wanted to say that if you have very strong
religious beliefs, I don't know, you may want to skip this one. Yeah, you know, we talk about
Satanism in this episode and what seems like glowing terms, but for my part at least, I was just
trying to have a little fun with it. So I hope that comes across. Yeah, we have an intellectual
conversation about Satanism. How about that? All right, agreed. All right, well on to the show, Chuck.
Welcome to the podcast. I'm Josh Clark, seated directly across from me is one of
Charles W. Wayne, Charles, Chuckers, Brian. That's pretty good. Oh, yells about himself.
Yep, and there is old scratch to my right. Matt, do you let people know your last name? Oh yeah,
you're a personality. Matt Frederick. Why don't want him to get kidnapped?
Guess producer, Matt Frederick of the old days, cohost of Stuff They Don't Want You to Know, and
now supervising producer for podcasts. Whoa. Matt, we don't let our producers talk on our episodes,
so we're going to have to beep that out. Matt says that was a huge announcement you just said.
Yeah. Nice. Well, congrats, Matt. And Matt's been working here forever just like us. Nice.
Lovely wife. Yep. Lovely child. Yes. Great family. Loves Indian food.
I didn't know that. Oh yeah. Yeah. It's bread and butter, as it were. It's his
ghee and naan. Now he's afraid to talk, which he should be. That's good. Matt's here. Yeah.
So thank you, Matt, and Hail Satan. I was going to say Hail Satan. Hail Satan, Chuck. Hail Satan,
Josh. It's funny. I went from, and when reading this, to thinking Satanists are
just libertarians. Yeah. To, no, Satanists are kind of Republicans. And I don't mean that,
you'll see what I mean. Okay. Philosophically in some ways. I don't mean,
and then I thought, well, I'm a Satanist. Okay. Did you, did you have an awakening?
Yeah. I mean, I read some of the stuff in their FAQ on their website and some of their fundamentals
and their, their, their 11 rules of earth and their nine satanic statements. We'll read all
that stuff. I thought, well, geez, I agree with a lot of this stuff. There are 13 things to avoid
getting gouged at the grocery store. What Satanists are not almost assuredly are not
evil people who meet in dark churches to perform ritual blood sacrifice and eat hearts and,
and draw pentagrams on it. Well, they may draw pentagrams. Yeah, that part's actually true.
But there's, there's more things that Satanists are not. I think if you're coming into this blind,
without knowing anything, you'll probably be surprised about just how kind of groovy they are.
And this is the church of Satan. Yeah. That I'm talking about mainly.
No, I think you can, you can apply what you just said to all Satanists.
Yeah, true. Because if you're a Satanist, you would take umbrage at the idea that somebody who
actually believes in the supernatural entity Satan is not a Satanist. Right. Because Satanism by
definition, at least modern Satanism by definition is an atheistic philosophy. So there's no
supernatural entities of any kind to Satanists. So somebody who worships Satan would be a
devil worshiper. Right. It's a completely different kind of thing.
Yeah. And the, I didn't even finish the last thing that I thought, well, no, I mean,
I got off track. The last thing I thought when I was reading about the temple of Satan is that
these are just liberal hippies. Temple of Satan. Such a rain. The Satanic temple.
Yeah. Satanic temple. They are, they are, um, I saw them compared to or analogized as a dark
yes men. Remember, you know, the yes men? No. Oh, you got to check out the yes men. There's a
couple of yes men documentaries and they basically do this, but it's not satanically associated.
And I wonder why it was satanically associated. I'm like, sounds like you're a bunch of
liberal hippie scientists to me. Well, we'll get into all that. Okay. Okay. So we're talking
Satanists and Satanism, if you couldn't tell, because we have been saying Satan a lot.
And if like Chuck said, um, you're coming into this blind, let us illuminate for you.
Yeah. Let us bring the light to your eyes. And we both, uh, grew goatees for this episode.
Yeah, exactly. And shaped our heads. And horns. John and Strickland actually could do a, uh,
oh man, sort of an amateur, uh, Anton Leves, if you wanted to. He could. I'm sure he does at home,
if you know what I mean. All right. So let's go back and this is a grabster article. So you know,
it's got the goods, um, and talk a little bit about the origin story of Satan, which, um,
um, we will lead up to sort of what the modern version of that is, but if you're thinking
red guy with a pitch fork and pointy hooves, that's, uh, tries to lure, uh, people away from
God to do bad things, that kind of came around later. So we need to go back further to the Hebrew
Bible, which the Christian Old Testament is derived from. Right. And there's a lot of uncertainty
on what Satan actually meant, depending on how you want to translate the Hebrew term. Right. And
the reason there's uncertainty is because Satan wasn't a figure in early Judaism because, uh,
the early Jews believed that all God was all things. God was good. God was evil. God was
responsible for everything in the universe. There wasn't what we understand now or anybody who
thinks of the Judeo Christian ethic. Now, um, there wasn't dualism, which is there's good
and the bad. There's light and the dark and they, they, they equal each other out and early Judaism,
this didn't exist. It was all in one. So there was no need for Satan. Right. But as this concept of
an all benevolent loving God spread, this question arose, which was, well, wait a minute,
if God is just so benevolent and loving, why does he, why does he or she, um, let bad things
happen? And so the, the need for the concept of Satan emerged later on. And because of the, um,
early Judaism's proximity to, uh, Persia, which was ruling the, the land at the time at about
like the sixth to third centuries BCE, um, Persia had Zoroastrianism, which had dualism. So they
kind of introduced, uh, the Hebrew faith to dualism and hence Satan was originally born.
Yeah. So there's no like consensus when you look at these old texts,
what these translations mean. Uh, sometimes it is an adversary or an opponent to God. Sometimes
it's not. Sometimes it's, uh, he's like the, uh, the, uh, an attorney in heaven's legal system.
Throwing the book at people like, um, Al Pacino. Oh yeah. Quite literally. What? Didn't you play
the devil? Or did he as a lawyer? Right. Devil's advocate. Right. With Keanu. I don't think I
ever saw that. I didn't either. But I mean, we're both alive at the time. So we know. Yeah. Uh,
uh, there, uh, you know, you look at all these different forms of what the word meant back then
before it became the modern version we all know. And the one kind of common thread through all of
them though is that Satan was an outsider who was sort of, uh, against the man and these established
values that everyone else seemed to believe in. Right. Or established rules or just even the
establishment in general. Yes. He's the antithesis of that. Correct. Uh, you get into the Christian
New Testament and it starts to clear up a bit, um, where there is a single being called Satan who
is supernatural and it's a direct opposition to God and is usually used as a, as a tool God uses
as a, in the Bible at least as a test, like go down there and test these humans to see if, uh,
see, see which way their allegiance lay. Right. Um, that Satan's called the scriptural Satan or
Satan of the scriptures. Right. Yeah. Um, he also kind of comes out of nowhere in the New Testament
to tempt Jesus in the desert, I believe. Um, and I mean, you know all this, right? Yeah. Am I right?
It was in the desert. Well, yeah. And I think, uh, by the way, just to back up to that last episode
when, and the stuttering when I didn't hear the story about Moses and the Bible with a
coal in his mouth or whatever, everyone wrote in was like, it's not in the Bible. Don't feel bad.
Oh, good. It was from something else. Right. It was from the Disney movie. Yeah. So, um,
but in one of the gospels in the New Testament, um, and no need to write in to let us know,
but it's in one of the gospels in the New Testament that, uh, Satan appears to Jesus to
try to tempt him and he's kind of brought in almost like he's a character that everybody
should know. But if you're just reading the New Testament from beginning to end, you're like,
what, who's this guy? Yeah. But they apparently another gospel makes mention that Satan was the
serpent in the Garden of Eden. So he's a big tempter. He's, he's bent on corrupting man and
getting man to stray from God's flock, basically. Yeah. And there are these, uh, there's certain
demons that are named properly in the Bible, um, like Beelzebub and Belial. Um, and again, it's just
sort of conjecture on our part, whether or not that's referring to Satan or whether it's a generic
evil. Um, it's just sort of difficult to, what it wasn't was the devil with the horns in the
pitchfork that we all think about. No. And those earliest names for the devil like Beelzebub are
actually corruptions or alterations of competing religions, gods, right? Yeah. So, uh, early Christianity
and, um, I guess middle Judaism had this kind of tendency to take other religions, gods, and make
them the evil characters in their religions because they wanted Christianity to flourish.
Right. Exactly. They wanted to, to make the competition look bad as a way to do it. It was
a smear tactic and a campaign to get converts, right? So Beelzebub is actually a corruption
of, um, Bilal Zavuv, which is, or no, I'm sorry, Bilal Zavul, Bilal the ex, or Bal the Exalted.
I think if you say that one more time, people appear here.
And Bal, B-A, apostrophe A-L was the main deity of the Canaanites and the Phoenicians who were
competing with the early Christians at the time. And, um, if you say Bal Zavuv, that means Lord
of the Flies, not Lord the Exalted. So it was like, uh, it was a slam on their, their main,
their competition's main God. And that's where Beelzebub came from. And that's actually,
that will become a common play in the Christian playbook of smearing the other guy's gods by
making them, um, evil figures in Christian, um, mythology. Clatu, Orata, Beelzebub. Remember, there
was a dead milkman album called Beelzebubba. Yes. And it had like that guy on a tractor on the cover.
That was Beelzebubba. Yeah. Um, well, the same with Lucifer. And, uh, when we finally got the
English language King James Bible in 1611, Lucifer was really a Latin term for morning star,
but in that version of the Bible, they say, no, what that really is, is the name of Satan.
Right. And he was the light bringer, the one who would reveal the truth to people that they were
actually being held down by God. Yeah. Which is not the Christian way. Right. So what you were
saying by co-opting all these, or not co-opting, but what kind of co-opting these bad religions,
another band. That's actually a real band name. Yeah, correct. Yeah. These bad religions and
saying those are the bad ones, uh, they would, that's how the, like the devil that we know today,
the Satan, sorry, that we know today has taken shape, uh, because they, uh, like the Greek God
Pan had the cloven hooves and the horns. Yeah. Uh, Bacchus, the Roman God is where you get this
insatiable, um, Bacchanalian decadence, um, which as we'll see with the church of Satan,
um, is it too far off? They, they certainly love their orgies. Sure. And their trays of fine meats
and roasted meats and cheeses. Jugs of wine. Um, so in the Middle Ages and the Renaissance,
then this, this mythology, Christian mythologies expanded. You get a couple of books that were
very key into shaping who we think of today as Satan. Right. Uh, one was, uh, John Milton's
Epic Poem, Paradise Lost, then of course Dante's Divine Comedy. Um, this is where we got the idea
that, uh, Satan was an angel expelled from heaven because of his pride, uh, who then said,
didn't I will defeat the Lord? These are actually from two books written by dudes.
Yeah. A lot of the mythology about Satan that Christians understand as Satan or that just
people in the culture generally understand as Satan, but don't show up anywhere in the actual
Bible, Old Testament or New Testament. All that stuff came afterwards. So Chuck, the,
the enlightenment was another turning point then. Big time. For the conception of Satan. And this is,
his evolution as like a, a scary supernatural otherworldly figure, um, takes a different turn
because the enlightenment was based on rational thought. Yeah. Secular humanism finds its roots
in the enlightenment. And, um, they started to come to see Satan as a kind of a creative force
almost. Yeah. A foil to the establishment. This idea that Satan is, um, the opposite of
the established norms and customs and, and moral goods. Yeah. Um, and that he's kind of like a
handy archetype for that. So he stops, he loses some of his supernatural, um, Jewish. Yes. And
is replaced by metaphorical Jewish. Yeah. And I think that's, that seems to be the one that the
church of Satan sort of identified with a little more. Was it Satan was just a, just a free thinking
dude. Yeah. Apparently that's where they got, that's where it finds its roots with the enlightenment.
Very interesting. Which makes sense because most Satanists would be probably humanists,
secular humanists, um, although they're individualists, but you could make a case that that's an
individual humanism. Yeah. Um, and that's, you know, that comes out of the enlightenment as well.
So, um, you want to take a break and then keep going or you want to keep going?
No, let's take a break and we'll talk a little bit about, uh, witches right after this.
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You might not smoke, but you're going to get secondhand astrology. And lately, I've been
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iHeart Radio App, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. So I promised talk of witches.
We did, and geez, that was a long time ago. We did an episode on witchcraft many, many years ago.
Yeah. And if you were a witch or a Western esoteric, you were probably one of two groups of people
to be accused of worshiping Satan in the Middle Ages and the Renaissance.
Basically, anything in opposition to organized Christianity was Satan worship.
Right. And that's the same thing as saying you're God, you're creator deity is like
Satan in our religion. It's the same thing. Anything that's in opposition to Christian thought
is automatically heretical. And the kind of almost like the lazy,
shorthand way of describing it is it's Satanic. You know Satan, he's scary and evil, right?
Well, what these people think is Satanic. Yeah. And if you listen to the episode on witchcraft,
and we haven't, I know stuff you miss in history class to the good episode on
what really happened in Salem, which we'll probably cover that at some point, I imagine.
But I think everyone pretty much knows at this point about 60,000 people, mainly women,
were put to death in the American colonies in Europe and under the guise of being Satan worshipers
and witches and practicing witchery. And by all accounts, they generally were, you know,
I don't like the way that lady looked at me in the town today. Or you know what, she,
I think she stole milk from my cow. Or I want her land. Or I want her land. Or
my wife is jealous of her. Right. So they're all witches. Let's burn them. Let's throw them
in lakes and see if they float. And let's burn them because if they don't float, then they're
not witches for the drown. And early physicians had more than just a small hand in this as well.
Well, they, um, in accusing, especially like folk healers and midwives of being witches,
again, to basically force the competition out. Yeah. We, we'll talk about that one.
And that seemed more recent.
You remember, maybe gray robbing. Did we talk about that in gray robbing?
Feels like it does. There were also things called esoteric orders, uh, which were,
I don't even know what you would call that today, basically kind of any group that didn't
even subscribe to the mainstream Christianity. So like the Masons or the Illuminati today?
Yeah. Uh, yeah. And like they, they were Christian at base.
Gnostics.
But then they had like, yeah, they had this other occult ideas in addition to it. Right. So
like the cathars or cathars are a good example of that. They were in, I think like the 12th to
14th century France and they were like Christian plus, right? They were, they, the cathars means
like the pure ones. Um, they were so Christian that they felt like just being a normal Pius Christian
wasn't enough. And you actually had to be baptized again. It was basically like a born again Christian
process, but in again, like 12th, 13th century France, they were considered heretics and they
were persecuted. You could call them an esoteric order because it didn't follow prescribed Christianity,
orthodox establishment Christianity to a T. It either was lacking some or had extra. And then
you're, you're a heretic and hence Satanist and esoteric order believed in Dan Brown books,
basically that all that stuff is true. All the stuff he writes about is about like esoteric
orders. Well, and here's the thing though, they were all labeled as Satanist, but there's no
evidence whatsoever that any of them were satanic and like in truth. Yeah. You know. Well, I was
reading about one, the Luciferians, they actually, they may have been, although their concept of
Satan wasn't that he was evil. Their concept was that he was the one true deity and that he had
been tricked into being kicked out of heaven unfairly by a treacherous Jehovah. Oh, interesting.
And that it was actually Lucifer who was supposed to be in charge and that Jehovah was oppressing
everybody. So if that's true, then yes, as far as the church goes, that is as satanic as you can
possibly get in your beliefs. Yeah. Because they were in total opposition to the church in their
beliefs as well. But that's, I mean, for the most part, most of these other groups were not in any
way shape or form satanic as you would think of it today. Well, yeah. And Ed even points out in
here the grabster that there's no evidence in world history that there's ever been any
long-term organized group of people that worship Satan as some evil entity. Right. That's a huge
one because that's one of the ways that Christianity was able to smear its rivals by
suggesting that they were part of a huge massive cult, satanic cult. Yeah. And I mean, like if
there's a supernatural entity that's bent on getting you and making your life terrible and
there's actually people on earth who are following this person, it's going to make you stay to the
straight and narrow of your prescribed religion even more. Yeah. Right. Fire and brimstone and
whatnot. Yes. I grew up with that, you know. Yeah. I was, I can't remember which show. I think it
was during satanic panic. We talked about the devil worship house in Stone Mountain that
it was the scariest place I had ever driven past on the way to stake and ale.
Man, I miss stake and ale. Are they done? They're surely they're around, right?
There's probably like one in Vegas and one in Hong Kong or something weird like that.
That'd be funny if the one on the Hong Kong was like this retrofobric themed American thing,
you know? Yeah. It's like America in the 80s. Right. All right. Well, let's talk about Anton
Leves then. Let's. Time has come. Oh, wait. I want to say one more thing. Okay. So in the,
I think the 14th century, the Knights Templar, another esoteric order, but a military order
were accused of worshiping Baphomet and Baphomet is Satan with like the goat's head and horns.
Yeah. That's the great looking statue they tried to put up in Oklahoma. Right. Well,
Baphomet is most likely an alteration or a mistranslation or something of Muhammad
and that it was used to basically include Muhammad as Satan in the Christian ethos when
the Christians first encountered Muslims during the Crusades. Yeah. So it was like the same thing,
but a thousand years after they did it to Beelzebub, they did it to Muhammad. And we should do like a
tin parter on the Crusades. Yeah, we should. Starting now. Just tried to think if I could,
I would be up for that. Yeah, I don't know. I don't think so. All right. Can we invite Anton
Levey in? Yes, now we can. The ghost of Anton Levey. It is Jonathan Strickland. So this dude,
he was born, he's the founder of the Church of Satan, if you did not know that. Look up a picture
of him. You've probably seen him before, bald head, goatee. Look at that guy. You know, it does
bug me about all Satanists is if you just look up photos of prominent ones or meetings,
they're always doing these faces. Yeah. Like you never, I mean, actually,
ironically, the only one I've ever seen smile on a picture is the current high priestess.
His name is Peggy, which I think is adorable. Sure. This is cute old lady. Yeah. I'm not even
that old, but yeah. She's like, oh, really? Old lady, huh? Yeah. Oh, no. She smiles in photos,
but every other picture are like, you know, their eyes are big and they're frowning or
they're licking their teeth or something. Yeah. Come on. I was on the Church of Satan website
yesterday and I saw a picture of some Satanists all smiling. Oh, yeah. But it was because Anton
Lavey had a naked woman over his knee and was spanking her. So they do smile in some pictures.
Oh, okay. Well, that makes sense. So Lavey was born Howard, Howard Lavey, Howard Stanton Lavey
in 1930 in Chicago. And the more I read about him in his early years, supposed early years,
the more he sounded like Elron Hubbard. Yeah, kind of. Because Elron Hubbard and Anton Lavey,
both, if you ask them about their backgrounds, they'll tell you one thing. If you ask someone
else who like Lawrence Wright, who does research, they say, I really can't find any evidence of
this stuff that they claimed. Yeah. I mean, if there was anyone who subscribed to lying
just as much as you possibly could as a form of showmanship, Anton Lavey was definitely that guy.
Yeah. So he says that he had a very colorful upbringing. He worked at a circus. He was
worked at side shows. He was a police photographer, which may have been true.
He was a very talented organist who worked burlesque shows. If you ask other people who have
done research, they say, no, kind of was this suburban kid in suburban San Francisco, not super
interesting. One thing that everyone will say though is that he was interested in the occult.
He was interested in pulp horror novels and magazines. Like Lovecraft. Love Lovecraft. And
he was interested in, he was very much turned off by the double standards, what he perceived to be
the double standards of mainstream Christianity. Right. Because supposedly he would play in these
burlesque shows and see all these men there. Then the next day, see them in the churches.
And that had a real impact on him supposedly that he was just like, this is BS. Yeah. He didn't
like phonies. He didn't like phonies. Phonies drove him crazy. Him and Holden Caulfield. Right.
Right. So in the 1960s, and this is kind of like with Elron Hubbard again, he started,
Leves started hosting these lectures on paranormal and he had a lot of flair and everyone was like,
man, who is this guy? He's really got something. He's kind of cool. And he talks about things
like indulging in all the worldly things. You shouldn't feel bad about it. You should masturbate
and have sex and have sex with tons of people at once if you want. And just do whatever pleases.
You. It's fine. Don't worry about it. Sure. And so people in the 60s were like,
there was a time in the late 60s where he was, there's this great article in the telegraph
when Satanism seduced Hollywood or something like that, where it was sort of the thing to
be a Satanist and to go to these parties because you would go in and there would be drugs and
drink and nakedness, like eyes wide shut up in there. Right. And everyone from
like some of the Beach Boys to Sammy Davis Jr. to Liberace. Liberace was a Satanist.
He said he was for a while. I didn't know that. Sammy Davis Jr. definitely was. He even had a
TV pilot that he tried to get made about like a sitcom that was Satan friendly.
That he like worked for the devil or something. We've got to find that. We have to find that.
It was supposed to be really bad and they only made one of them, but um. Oh, so there is. So
it's out there somewhere. Well, supposedly he made a pilot that never went beyond that. Got you.
Jane Mansfield was another famous Satanist. Yeah. So it was a big thing and Charles Manson
kind of ruined all that. Oh yeah. Manson ruined a lot of stuff. It's a part of it being cool.
Yeah. To go to the church of Satan, but at any rate, LaVe was making waves and in 1966
created officially the church of Satan and in 1969 published the Satanic Bible. Right.
Which is pretty interesting to read through. Yeah. I haven't read it all, but I read quite a bit
of passages. So one of the things that he's accused of is um plagiarism. Yeah, for sure.
And his uh his adherents still to this day, they kind of acknowledge it a little bit,
but they more put it like, no, he was building on an earlier work. Yeah. He didn't really give
credit to, but there was a book. Um, so he wrote the Satanic Bible in 69. Published in 1969. Yeah.
Um, there was a book published in 1890. I think it was um called Might is Right and it was written
pseudonomously by um a guy named Ragnar Redbeard. Ragnar Redbeard wrote this book and it was extremely
um into social Darwinism. Uh-huh. It was um individualistic to the point of being anarchistic.
Uh-huh. Uh, it had all of the requisite 1890s racism and sexism attendant to it as well. Sure.
But um the point of it was is like, like, why would you, you know, love your enemies? This whole
doctrine of love is BS. We're animals and if you have an enemy, you should go out and beat
him up because he's your enemy and you don't need to love him. You need to love yourself.
And um, it was really just a surprising book that apparently still a lot of people read today.
Um, and apparently Anton Levé read it and adopted a lot of it. Yeah. But then he also wrote a lot
about ritual and stuff as well and prescribed certain kinds of rituals in the Satanic Bible.
And supposedly the, the three main types of rituals of greater magic, there's greater magic
and lesser magic. But in the greater magic um, rituals, there is uh, compassion. Yep. There's
uh, and that's not just for others, but also yourself. There's lust. Yeah. And then there is
destruction. Yes. And all of them are meant as they're meant for you. Yeah. The person doing this,
they're meant for you. They're meant as what was called the intellectual decompression chamber
where you can just get rid of this baggage that you've got. And they're like, it's, it's nothing
more than this little psychodrama that you're performing for yourself to just make yourself
feel better. Yeah. Like lust is to release your sexual urges. Like he'll say Christianity teaches
you to repress all that stuff. That ain't, that ain't no good for you. Right. You need to go release
these urges. Yeah. You're walking around with all this stuff that's like hanging on you,
like get rid of it so you can go be happy and stop dwelling on this stuff. It's the same with
destruction, cleansing oneself of anger towards someone who has done you an injustice. Like,
why sit on that? Right. How do you deal with it? You're sitting there stewing about it.
Smash the face. Go put on your velvet robe. Well, no, no, that was, that was, but that was,
that's something that Satanism has long been accused of is like being violent toward others.
And I don't think that they say like, no, don't be violent toward others. Um, they even say like,
you don't certainly don't owe anybody being nice to them or anything like that. But, um,
there, there seems to be kind of a, uh, I haven't seen any overt calls to violence. It just seems
to be like, uh, if, if that's what you deem as right, as long as you're following these other
prescribed paths that seem to kind of avoid violence, that it's more just like you, it's,
it's centered on you and you need to focus on yourself. And if you focus on yourself,
then you're probably going to stop wanting to smash that other guy in the face because
you're going to get rid of that baggage. Can I read the 11 Satanic rules of the earth?
Please. Number one, do not give opinions or advice unless you were asked.
Okay. Not bad. Yeah. Number two, do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they
want to hear them. Yeah. Not bad. Uh, number three, when in another's lair, show him respect or else
do not go there. Yeah. Respect someone's home. Uh, number four, if a guest in your lair annoys
you, treat him cruelly and without mercy. Uh, number five, do not make sexual advances unless
you are given the mating signal. That's sort of that's a sixties way of saying I'm down with
affirmative consent. Uh, do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to
the other person and he cries out to be relieved. Okay. Like, you know, don't rob people of stuff.
Relieve me of this glass of Diet Coke. I can't stop drinking. Number seven, acknowledge the power
of magic. If you have employed it successfully to obtain your desires, if you deny the power of
magic, after having called upon it with success, you will lose all you have obtained. That's a
little fruity. I didn't even hear that full when I trailed off so long. Number eight, do not complain
about anything to which you need not subject yourself. And finally, yeah, that's a good,
I think that one bears repeating. Oh wait, I say finally, that's only number eight. Oh,
you want me to repeat that? Please. Do not complain about anything to which you need not
subject yourself. Yes. Number nine, do not harm little children. I should probably repeat that
one too. Do not harm little children because that's a big deal. There are all these people that think
like, you know, you sacrifice children and you perform sex with children and that's what satanists
do. And they're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, we're not into that at all. No, one of the things
of the satanic temple who we'll talk about in a little while point out is that there have been
a lot of cases of people who are supposedly exercising demons from children who have actually
harmed and in fact killed children. Yes. And that there's no, I think we talked about this in the
satanic panic episode too. There's no documented cases of satanists harming children. Right.
Is there against it? And in fact, they won't even accept anyone under the age of 18 into the
church of satan. Yeah, because self-consent is extremely important to satanists of all stripes.
The idea of being forced into indoctrinated into any church before you can make a decision for
yourself really goes against the idea of individual liberty and thus satanic thought.
Number 10, do not kill non-human animals. Because like you said, they called humans animals too.
In fact, they said that we're not much better even than animals. No, which is an animal reminder.
It is. Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.
Like if a cheetah pounces on you, kill it. Yeah. If you want to eat the cheetah.
And then finally, drumroll, 11 satanic rules of the earth. When walking into open territory,
bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.
Nice. Sounds like a tenacious D lyric. It does. But the way you counted down,
it was like a letterman list. I know. I like that. That was good, man. I miss Dave.
I wonder how many long time listeners we've lost at this episode. I don't know.
You want to take another break? Yeah. I mean, there's still so much more,
but we got to break at some point. Yeah. We're going to take a break.
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All right, Chuck, we're back with Satan. Remember the kids in the hall?
Oh, yeah. Kevin McDonald, I think, with Satan.
Was that him? Yeah. So we've been talking a little bit about the philosophies of the Church
of Satan. Just real quickly, there are nine satanic sins. And again, I hate to say it,
but this is sort of appealing to my brain. The nine satanic sins are stupidity, pretentiousness,
solipsism, self-deceit, herd conformity, lack of perspective, forgetfulness, forgetfulness,
a past orthodoxy, counterproductive pride, and lack of aesthetics.
A lot of those are really, really tough to explain. Anton LaVe. Well, some of them are
pretty self-evident, but forgetfulness of past orthodoxies. LaVe wrote this list in 1987,
and it's on the Church of Satan website, if you're interested, go check it out.
Because some of you are like, oh, it kind of makes sense.
87? 67. 87, nice. Oh, really? Well, it was copyrighted in 1987.
So the takeaway is that what's LaVe, what the Church of Satan and LaVean satanism,
what it really is, is atheistic, anti-Christian ideals. Well, that is something that you said
is really important. The Church of Satan specifically, the one founded by Anton LaVe, has positioned
itself as counter to Christianity. It really does not like Christianity. And as a result,
it's allowed itself to kind of be drawn into a lot of pedanticness and arguments that it shouldn't.
And it almost seems like they feel they need to justify themselves because of
putting themselves in that position. So if that kind of turns you off, well, then friends,
you're going to love the satanic temple. Yeah. And if you were interested in that,
you can become a member of the Church of Satan by sending $200 to a PO box
that you can find on their website. But you get a membership card, and that's it.
That's all you get. Yeah. And there's actually a lot of criticism among Satanists of the
Church of Satan because they haven't done anything for a really long time. And a lot
of people give credit to LaVe for founding the Church of Satan. And while he was alive,
the Church was thriving. But after he died, the Church kind of died with him in the eyes of
a lot of Satanists, especially satanic temple adherents that I've seen.
Yeah. It's now headed by Peter Gilmore, who I think John Hodgman is actually sort of a pal of
his now. I believe that. I have to say it showed a lot of restraint by Peter Gilmore,
not to change his name to Peter Grimmmore. And then as I mentioned earlier, Peggy Nadramia
is the high priestess right now. Yeah. But I agree. Moving on to the satanic temple,
it's pretty fun because they have something out there called the Satanic Children's Big Book
of Activities. I think it was given to me by Matt Frederick. It was given to me by someone,
but it's called the Satanic Children's Big Book of Activities. And it's wonderful.
We talked about that for sure on Internet Roundup. Yeah. For sure. And that was just like one in a
string of, I don't want to say countless, because if I bothered to, I could count them, but there
was like a string of basically satanic-based political projects that the satanic temple is
taken on that really kind of define who they are. They are part performance art,
very much political activists, and are trying to basically use, they say that they're using
Satanism, although they all subscribe to philosophical, atheistic, human secularism,
Satanism. Minus the social Darwinism. Right. And the Ain-Ran libertarianism. Yes.
They're using Satanism though in the popular conception as a poison pill for the church
versus state debate, right? Yeah. And you can also buy shirts and hoodies and coffee mugs.
So with this, they use this poison pill, these list of projects. One of them was the
Satanic Children's Activity Book, which they printed up to distribute at schools.
I think there was a school in Florida where Christian evangelists were handing out
pamphlets at a public school. So the Satanists said, oh, well, great. Well, if they can do it,
then any religion can do it because the First Amendment prohibits the establishment of any
religion or endorsement of religion by the government. So we can go do it too. So they
start handing out Satanic stuff. And any time the Satanists roll into town and say,
us too, that usually means that the local city council or the state even puts an end to the
implicit Christian endorsement of what that's going on. Like sanctioned Christian endorsement
via politics. And by the way, when I say that that children's workbook is wonderful, and if
you're out there going, oh, why would you say that? Go check it out. It's literally stories about
kids being more accepting of others and being friendly and sharing. And it's like any children's
book, but the kids wearing like Instagram t-shirts and stuff, which makes me wonder,
like, what about this? Why call themselves that? It seems like they just are another trying to
rabble rouse and get attention. But I think they might get a little further if, or maybe that's
the whole point. I think we'll in part using it as the, like if you, this actually happened,
there's a town in Arizona, I'm not sure which one, but they had a habit of opening their
city council meetings with a Christian prayer. Well, most likely every single person in that town
that the city council represents is not Christian. Right. But since it was, there was a, there was
some landmark court ruling, I can't remember when, maybe 2014, where the Supreme Court said,
no, it's actually okay, as long as they don't prohibit any religions from doing this. Right.
The Satanist showed up and said, well, here come the Satanists, we're going to give a benediction
to open up your city council meeting. And the city council said, okay, nobody's going to do prayers
anymore. Well, that's kind of what their job is. Right. To shut it down. But if they, if they just
did it like, well, the secular humanists are here and we're going to say a prayer, they'd be like,
well, who cares? That's fine. But the people who are so afraid of Satanists are so afraid of Satanists
that they would just, they would rather stop the city council implicitly endorsing the Christian
prayer than to allow the Satanic prayer as well. That's how it works. Yeah. And it's the same with
the statue in Oklahoma. Yeah. He said, oh, well, you're going to put up your statue or we're going
to put up one of, what's it called? Baphomet. Baphomet, which again, I know you've seen the
statue. We both love it just because it's so cool looking. Looks like the cover of some great heavy
metal album. It does, but it's like nine feet tall. Yeah. The two kids looking up adoringly at him.
And Chuck, the Satanic temple has another thing going on right now too, the new initiative that
they started, which is the afterschool Satan club. And again, I have to laugh. It just sounds funny.
But what it is, it's an afterschool curriculum to teach reasoning and social skills to kids.
And again, as a counter to something called the Good News Club, which is an evangelical
Christian afterschool program. So again, they're saying, you got yours? We'll have ours. Yeah.
And there's another 2001 Supreme Court ruling that said, you know what, sure, we can have religious
afterschool programs. And the, just the floodgates opened and the Lucian grieves whose name is Doug
Mezner. He's one of the founders of the Satanic temple. He says, we're doing this because the
Good News Club is creating a need for it. If they were just doing this in churches,
rather than public schools, we wouldn't have our afterschool Satan club, but they are. So we are.
Yeah. Here's a quote. While the Good News Club focuses on indoctrination and stealing children
with the fear of hell and God's wrath, afterschool Satan clubs will focus on free inquiry and
rationalism. We prefer to give children appreciation of the natural wonders surrounding them, not a
fear of an everlasting, otherworldly horror. However, being a member of the Satanic temple
or the church of Satan is not to say that you can just be very much out with it these days.
A lot of those folks, even if they are really just secular, humanist, atheist at heart,
they do want to associate with the Satanic temple or church of Satan. They, a lot of times,
will still keep it quiet, keep it a secret, because you will get, people don't get what it's
about. And they will think, well, again, people still believe that they have blood sacrifice
and sacrifice animals and eat the hearts out of goats and things like that.
Right. And there have been people in history who have killed in the name of Satan.
Sure. And that's who people point to and say, see, see Satanists are killers. And it's like,
no, that person was out of their mind. Yeah. They were mentally ill.
Or they were pretending to be mentally ill so that they would get a lighter sentence.
And that's what they were doing, that they weren't actual Satanists. Again,
a true Satanist will point out that Satanists are atheists. Right.
That they see Satan as a construct, as a metaphor, a shorthand for something that
goes against the norms that questions the establishment and says,
how do you know what you're saying is right? Who says?
Yeah. And we don't even worship Satan per se. We really, if you want to say anything,
worship ourselves as individual gods.
Peter Gilmore calls it atheism.
Oh, that's catchy.
Isn't it?
The lowercase I.
He's like, yes, Gilmore, you genius.
What did you say his name should have been?
Grimmore.
Grimmore or Kilmore.
Yeah, Richard Ramirez, David Berkowitz, son of Sam, talked about demons.
Ricky Casso famously in the 70s. I was an American teen who killed someone in the name of Satan and
much to Angus Young Chagrin was hauled into court with his ACDC T-shirt on.
Right.
We're not going to get too much into this because you can go listen to our great episode on the
Satanic Panic of the 80s from January 5th, 2016. But in short, it was a time where people
like Ozzy Osbourne and Judas Priest were making use of satanic imagery purely for gags and selling
records. None of it was, I mean, today there are some legit creepy dark metal bands that are very
much more overt with their lyrics and things. But I think Ozzy Osbourne has definitely been outed
as, you know, not some Satan worshipping ghoul.
Yeah.
You know, anyone who's ever seen him on television can tell you that.
Yeah. I mean, it bears fleshing out. There are supposedly the goth scene in Germany in
particular is where neo-Nazism and neo-paganism kind of come together.
A lot of people point to that as some sort of neo-Satanism. But again, if you're talking about
Satanism with a capital S as an atheistic philosophy and somebody murdering in the name of Satan
holds about as much water as somebody murdering in the name of the Easter Bunny.
You got anything else?
Yeah. Just let me quote with a finish with a passage from the satanic Bible on love.
Satanism has been thought of as being synonymous with cruelty and brutality.
This is only so because people are afraid to face the truth. And the truth is that human beings
are not all benign or all loving. Just because the Satanist admits he is capable of both love
and hate, he is considered hateful. On the contrary, because he is able to give vent to his hatred,
through ritualized expression, he is far more capable of love, the deepest kind of love.
By honestly recognizing and admitting to both the hate and the love, he feels there's no
confusing one emotion with the other without being able to experience one of these emotions
who cannot fully experience the other.
Wow.
Either Dr. Seuss or Anton Levé.
Yeah. That's Zoroastrian dualism if I've ever heard it.
Yeah.
Well, if you want to know more about Satanism, well, go look up this article. It's a Grabster
article on HowStuffWorks.com. And since I said Grabster, it's time for Listener Mail.
Hello, Chuck Bryant and Josh Clark.
Hello.
Very formal. This is on stuttering. I've stuttered for most of my life. I say
most of my life because it started when I was five. As you mentioned in your show,
there are several different ways it can happen. I would always try to think of a different word
to use when I got stuck, and that would result in very strange sounding sentences.
I would define stuttering as inability to coordinate breath flow with words.
Blocking on a word or sound would often result in a cessation of breathing entirely.
Kind people often tell me that stuttering does not bother them, but the fact is,
when I stutter, my internal reaction is that I feel and sound like a fool.
I rationally know that it's not true, but that is what I often feel nonetheless.
And of course, unkind people abound, and I often heard as a child reactions like,
don't you know what you want? From other kids and adults, laughter and derision.
Often I'd hear, just sing it. And while it's true that singing and speaking are operated
by different parts of the brain, life is not a musical, and besides, I hate musicals.
So at the age of 67, I would never have thought that I'd end up talking on the phone and dealing
with the public for a living. I still occasionally stutter and sometimes feel pretty badly,
but I've learned to just live with it. Sometimes feel as I get older, I just don't give a darn
anymore. That allows me to relax and stutter less. That is a perk of aging.
Sure.
Not caring.
Stress brings it out and does, as does talking about my difficult and bizarre childhood.
I'm a singer. I'm one of the resident shantysingers at the National Maritime Historical Park
at Hyde Street Pier in San Francisco. Nice. And it performed in front of large audiences.
Singing is not a problem, but introducing songs can be. You might say I'm the Mel Tillis
traditional song. And that lovely email was from Richard Adrian Owitz.
Thank you, Richard. I love that one. Yeah, good one. Nice. And everybody who's in San
Francisco, go down to Fisherman's Wharf and see Richard. Yeah, check out the show.
The Mel Tillis of Shantysing. I love it. If you want to get in touch with us,
you can send us an email. Send it off to stuffpodcast.ihartradio.com.
Stuff you should know is a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts,
My Heart Radio, visit the I Heart Radio app. Apple podcasts are wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Life. Tell everybody about my new podcast and make sure to listen so we'll never ever have to say
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Apple podcast or wherever you listen to podcasts. I'm Munga Chauticular and it turns out astrology
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