supermegashow - EP 278 - SuperMega Virus Speedrun 100%

Episode Date: January 5, 2022

We accidentally gave someone radiation poisoning, gush about the DMV, and Ryan got the ‘rona. Go to Curology.com/SUPER to start your free 30-day trial! Go to Keeps.com/SuperMega to get your first month of treatment for free. Secure your online data TODAY by visiting ExpressVPN.com/Supermega To get 15% off your first order, free shipping, and a 100% satisfaction guarantee, go to: MeUndies.com/SUPERMEGA Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish.

Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I.com. Hi, can I a happy man, I make crispy and tan McNuggets. Tasty golden fries, a cold drink with extra ice. Junior chicken will be fire and a sweet hot apple pie. Is that it? Let me get a quarter pounder with cheese, a flat fish, oh please.

Make good as a McMuffin and a large coffee. A hamburger, cheeseburger, hodgepodge, hotcakes. Vanilla cone shake and a hot bar sundae. Ba-da-ba-ba-ba. Wow. Guess what? What? Wow. Guess what? What? It's been 2,022 years since Christ gave his life for your sins, Ryan.

Love you, Jesus. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you. Thank you. And God for sending your one and only son to then spread his Holy Spirit into us. Thank you for sending your one and only son to be viciously slaughtered in front of a crowd. It was beautiful. The crucifixion of Christ was beautiful. The sunset. A man dribbled

with blood. Gasping for breath as he asphyxiated on the cross. And then when they stabbed his liver with the spear. They did and water came out. Does that really happen? And it made a sound. Then Christ up there farting on the cross. That stinks. Then he slapped Jesus

on his fucking plump little ass. And it jiggled a little bit. And Jesus went, oh. He went, oh, oops. Yeah. Every time he farts, his, like, cheeks flutter. Well, we're starting out the first episode of 2022 talking about Christ farting on the cross.

How else are we going to start the year? Oh, yeah. I got COVID. Oh! Over Christmas holiday. Goddamn. I know. How was it for you?

What would you give it out of five stars? I did not like it. I got achy. Got achy? Felt like an old person. I felt, you know, like an old person, like a 35-year-old. Yeah. Yeah.

Arthritis and shit like that? Yeah. I had a fever. Oh, you had a fever yeah you had a fever had a cough oh had congestion you actually got symptoms have you had your booster no oh that might be why then i was i was going to get it like at a walmart in south carolina because you can just walk in and fucking get it because apparently no one's really getting in south oh i didn't see, like, because here you have to. I was usually the only person wearing a mask

when I would go somewhere in South Carolina. And I didn't get it through, like, travel or anything. Well, technically, I guess I did. I got it because I visited a friend in Atlanta. I drove to Atlanta from Greenville. We drove to Atlanta from Greenville. No, Greenville. Yes, I got it right the first time.

From Greenville to Atlanta. From, yes. You got that Atlanta Omicron dude I did that shit's wild man and a buddy had someone staying with him like a few days before we arrived and then he tested positive after we already visited him

it's so contagious this strain Omicron I know so many people now that have it because the other ones every now and then even with Delta it'd be like oh know so many people now that have it cause like the other ones every now and then like even with Delta it'd be like oh shit did you hear that they have it and it's like oh really and now it's like oh this person has it and so does this one oh okay I did test positive

so it is official I have it now I screen capped it I'm like this is history baby yeah you're not supposed to see I didn't know this that after you test positive you're not supposed to keep getting tested to make sure. Because you can stay positive for like five months. Yeah.

So I spent. You should just follow the 10 to 14 day. Yep. Which is now five days. Well, it's five days to get people back to work. Which the virus doesn't care about that. No, no, it doesn't. Did you see like Delta and stuff

were like requesting the CDC, like right before they made it five days, they were like requesting like, can you please make it five days? And then the CDC made it five days right after that. They went pretty pleased with sugar, with money on top. We'll give you some SkyMiles. Ooh, 10,000 Delta SkyMiles. I do too, man. I haven't logged a lot.

I have flights that I haven't logged in my account I gotta do. But I used American this time to get home because Delta's expensive as fuck. AA Advantage, baby. You know? Yeah. They all got their fucking SkyMiles. Can people transfer SkyMiles? Can any fans give us SkyMiles?

I don't know. Is that possible? Can we just get SkyMiles from people? Here's 300,000 SkyMiles. Thanks, guys. That'd be kind of cool if you could do that. But the Delta variant is the bad one

is the bad bad one that's the one where you get real sick but Omicron's way more contagious well I'm scared about I think I got I probably just got

just got Omicron that's what everyone is getting right now I wonder I spent like Christmas and Christmas Eve just in quarantine with a bunch of friends

cause we all just we all got it from each other it was like me and three other no sorry me four other people that's fun though yeah as long as you don't feel like absolute shit i didn't have any symptoms there were like two days where i felt like kind of achy and just mainly i just got really fucking tired more so than i normally do which is already really tired so and also i noticed when when I'd go up the stairs,

I'd get real winded real quick. But now I don't have any lasting... I had a cough for a really long time and a runny nose for two months after, but now that's gone. I had a good bit of congestion afterwards, but I feel like I'm pretty much back to normal. My voice is probably still somewhat affected. It's still a bit of still a bit affected

by it i i was well i just thought it was weird that i had the runny nose and the cough for like two months it wouldn't go away but then it's gone now but yeah man well welcome to the club 100% of super mega has gotten covid coronavirus has justin you're right i don't think justin has so we got to change that true okay do you see how many cases are getting reported a day like new cases for for COVID with Omicron how many like

I saw the number and I was like you ask me as if I know and then you don't have the correct answer maybe maybe I just saw the headline new COVID I saw that like 7,000 flights were canceled or some shit like that. What about flu water? This is the biggest spike ever.

Entertain the people as I go find my water. Okay. I said entertain them. Worldwide, new cases. I thought the bitch was white. Speaking of white bitches, dude. I think that's one of my favorite meltdowns. Who did that?

Roseanne. Oh, that's right. I thought she was white. I thought the bitch was white. Dude, I have horrible insomnia. And one of the options for that is Ambien. And legit, Roseanne is the entire reason I've stayed away from trying Ambien. Because I'm like, what if I get on Twitter when I'm on Ambien?

Could Ambien sue her because she said she was on Ambien and used it as an excuse? It's just a sedative. So it just kind of makes you like, you know when you go to the hospital and they pump you full of sedatives and you're kind of loopy? But Joe Rogan says that Ambien... Oh, yeah. I guarantee she was mixing it with alcohol. She is a drunk. Yeah, she is. She's got a fat ass,ien. Oh, yeah. I guarantee she was mixing it with alcohol. She is a drunk. Yeah, she is.

She's got a fat ass, too. Oh, yeah, baby. U.S. Council over two days ago, one million new daily cases in one day. Oh, nice. In the U.S. Just the United States alone? Just the United States, yeah. So, yeah, I'll enjoy that.

That's awesome. I wonder if we're going to go into another lockdown with those numbers. This is the highest it's ever been. Yeah. I'm just scared if another variant comes around that's like this contagious, but this one, but it's like dead. You know, in the middle of all this, my mom wants to come visit. She could stay with you.

Yeah, exactly. She could stay with me if she wants. I think you could house her, right? Yeah, I could house her, bro. I got a guest room. She wouldn't be staying in the guest room, though. It's a little messy right now, and I don't want to embarrass myself. Oh, yeah. You know, it's messy because Swagger Souls just stayed in the guest room, though. It's a little messy right now, and I don't want to embarrass myself. Oh, yeah.

You know, it's messy because Swagger Souls just stayed in my guest room. Because it was 11 o'clock at night, and I was cleaning my living room, and I get a Discord phone call from Swagger Souls, who I hadn't talked to in about a year or so. So I was like, oh, shit. And he's like, I'm in a predicament, Matt. That's my best Swagger Souls. You could hear his voice reverberating on the tinny helmet he wears.

Yeah, and he was really putting on the full voice, because a lot of people think he doesn't do that voice normally in real life. He does. That's his real voice. In real life, he has to tone it down for the videos. But he's like, my flight got canceled. You got a couch I could crash on? And I was like sure yeah so he uh came

to my house and he spent the night in my guest room and we had a wonderful night we uh oh damn dude ryan just got fucking shocked i heard that dude what the fuck it's the it's the other switch yeah sorry we're playing with the lights getting them oh that's some nice atmosphere okay one of what the fuck? It's the other switch. Yeah. Sorry, we're playing with the lights. Ooh, that's some nice atmosphere. It felt a little too office. Like a waiting room.

Yeah, but anyway, we had a great night. We had some drinks, smoked some weed. We took some vitamins. And then? And then I said goodnight, buddy. And gave him a little kiss good night. Gave him a little kiss good night. Yep. On the lips, which was a mistake, actually.

And then he goes to bed. And then next day he leaves. And then he flies to Australia. And the second he gets to Australia, he messages me. He's like, hey, man, I just tested positive. So you might want to get tested. And I was like, fuck. So like he had COVID while he was at my place that whole time.

We're hanging out all night. When was this? This was over a week ago. Okay. I waited like four days, I think, to get tested. Yeah. After he said that. Usually it's like four to five days.

It was within the range. Or five to seven days. I got tested though when I was negative. So this whole time I thought positive meant like it's positive you don't have it. Yeah, man. I'm positive. You're positively awesome. Yeah, so I guess the booster did its job there.

Because right now I guess I got, once you have the booster, bro, you and me, we got the antibodies from having it. The natural booster. And then we got the fucking. Oh, fuck yeah. I got Moderna. So I'm mixing and matching. I got Pfizer originally. And now I got Moderna.

And now they're talking about making us get a fucking fourth one Fuck yeah Let's go Let's get the fucking jab dude Let's go Brandon Let's go Brandon We were saying earlier like it's gotta suck Like now if you have a son named Brandon

Let's go Brandon Like a sporting event without looking Like some like Let's go Brandon Brandon! Like a sporting event without looking like some, like... Let's go, Brandon! Sir, leave it at home. No, no, no, no, no. This is a game.

We're just trying to enjoy ourselves. No, it's no politics. My son, he's out there on the field. Okay, stop mansplaining the situation to me. Sir. Let's go, B. Sir! B, let's go.

Let's go, B. All right, Brandon. Sir, we see what you're still doing. No, no, no. It's my son. I'm so proud of him I love you B fuck I saw a lot of

let's go Brandon shirts in South Carolina you did? yeah damn losers I saw one that was like that's hilarious

it was like the Obama like logo but it said let's go Brandon I saw them in Barnes and Noble bunch of goofy motherfuckers they are it is very goofy to me yeah but they weren't

the ones wearing pussies on their heads, were they? Yeah, that's true, Ryan. They didn't have those vaginas on their heads. Having a march for women? Yeah, I'll have a march for women. Marching straight into the bedroom to have some sex. That's right.

That's right. I had to carefully word that one so it didn't sound really bad. Yeah. But, yeah, Ryan had COVID. I had COVID. He's healed now. You're a little tired today. You got a cough still.

I have a bit of a cough, but that's because I was bad and I hit on some vape while I was gone. A friend had a vape. When I had COVID, I was vaping the whole time I had COVID, and I knew I shouldn't have been doing it. But I was like, this is so bad. But I was stuck at home for two weeks, bored as fuck. And I'm like, I'm not choosing this time to break my nicotine addiction because then I'll be even more miserable. I was just, you know, being in one location for 10 solid days, 10 plus solid days. It was kind of like, you know.

You got to see your friends more. I did. Well, that was awesome. It was cool because we never, well, I never got tired of them. They said, like, it's cool how, like, we never ended up killing each other during this. It's like, yeah, it's crazy. Yeah, I mean. We just played a lot of Halo, watched some movies.

Ooh. Took some naps. Took some naps. Bro, that's what you got to do when you go home for Christmas. I took some naps when I went home. I did not have a fantastic time back home. No. Well. You were bullied. you go home for Christmas. I took some naps when I went home. I did not have a fantastic time back home. No? Well, you were bullied?

Well, there was, so, you know, me and my sister and her husband and then all of my cousins, we all stayed in the same house. And I arrived third. So my sister... In your Mustang that you rented. Yeah, pulled up, bro.

And, you know know it was like seniority rules so like my oldest cousin and her husband got the master bedroom my sister and her husband get the guest bedroom you're the youngest I'm assuming no there's a guest bedroom upstairs and I slept in that but then my cousin Liz flew in and she's two years older than me

so I was like yeah you can go ahead and have that there's another room somehow my younger cousin gets that room and I got the fucking couch in the living room, which the fan that's above the couch and it's a high ceiling. It's like 20 something feet because it's like a big open den living room. And the fan is missing two of the blades because just the week prior, they just fallen off while the fan sitting still. And the fan, the couch is directly underneath that, that fan with three more blades on it.

And I'm like, I'm going to like, like just be asleep and one of these is gonna come just you're gonna like wake up and like your skull's gonna be caved in yeah they're gonna they're gonna come out in the morning like wake up matthew and it was fucking blood all over the carpet and there's a ceiling fan blade oh my god the fan yeah we knew we'd get killed by a fan, but not this way. Yeah, they'd be pissed, man. My cousin would be mad about that. But yeah, so I slept on the couch. I slept like shit every single night.

Incredibly uncomfortable. And then I was just really bored, so I came back on the 26th. I was really nice seeing my mom. I was supposed to be back on the 30th. We were supposed to celebrate New Year's together. I know, but let's just say Mr. Corona had different plans for you. He did. Yeah.

That he did. I didn't get to have any of my grandmother's cooking. Really? Nope. None of her cooking? None of it. Fuck, man.

Did she mail you some? No. Well, I can maybe do some of your grandmother's cooking. She gets me the recipes. No, it's fine. My friends, luckily, they make food like their 50-year-old southern parents.

That's the type of food they make. It's just very southern comfort food, and it's all so fucking delicious. You know, we see our friends our age cooking meals. No. And I'm ordering fucking McDonald's, and I'm like ordering fucking mcdonald's and i'm like man i really should should start cooking i'm having like some of my resolutions i need to start cooking this year because postmates is too much waste of money and also it's just like i'm just lazy man it's like cooking is i have to go buy the ingredients then i have to measure it

out and i have to stand. Meal prep it. That's true, but... All in one sitting, all in one go. Yeah, I don't know. It's just easier. You do have to, I guess... I've conditioned myself to be lazy. I bet something I'm trying to... You can make cooking exciting for yourself.

You like... Smoked a little crack beforehand. Last time you ate some bacon, you experimented and put some maple syrup or something on it. That's true, man. I just gotta get my... You're coming up with all these

wonderful combinations. I put mayonnaise on the bacon. Mayonnaise and maple syrup? Holy shit, dude. On the mayonnaise? That actually might be kind of good.

I don't know. Like one of those weird things that sounds like disgusting but it's actually like... Like there's a cheeseburger that has like pickles and peanut butter on it that Dom was telling me about and I was like, it sounds, but it's actually like, like there's a cheeseburger that has like pickles and peanut butter on it that Dom was telling me about. And I was like, it sounds gross, but it might actually be really good.

I want the apple pan so bad. Oh, I want to go back there, man. I could fucking tear up one of those burgers. Can't though. I was bad over the holidays and I got to get back on the whole regimen. I've neglected training from the start pretty much. I still haven't really fully started. I've been taking, you know, some some sessions but i haven't fully started my training

so monday is like the official day that i'm kicking it fully you have gone to like training sessions i've done i've done a handful of sessions but like in terms of the regimen of exercising to build muscle and like eating correctly and stuff i haven't been doing that uh i kept it up a bit back when when i went back but then as soon as like i'd say christmas eve i was like nah and i felt discouraged because i was in taking so many more calories i normally do like by like a thousand two thousand a day and i didn't gain a single pound and i was like what the fuck uh but my coach says he knows why so i got basically what I need to do is I think. There's a demon inside of you.

It's eating. There's a demon stealing all the fat. I know an exorcist. It's not by the books, though. The Catholic Church hasn't signed off on him in decades. What? But he's the only one that I know of. What?

That is consistent with his exorcisms. I have a demon inside me? I need to get an exorcism his name is galafa uh something it'll cost you five thousand dollars matthew on top of the already thick price of the regimen and training that we already have set forward that's another five thousand,000 a week. Okay, well, if I got a demon inside of me, I gotta fucking get it out, so... Now you're also gonna have to pay for his gas. Where's he coming from? Why do I have to

pay for his gas? He's coming all the way from Vegas. Okay, that's not that far of a drive. That's, what, three, four hours? That's a lot of gas. That's one tank of gas. Two, he has to drive back. No, that's not, okay. That's fair, but why do I have to, I mean, why do I have to pay for the gas? Is that just

part of it? I don't have to pay for his, like, hotel or anything, right? No. Okay. Unless you wanted to. No, I don't really want to, but I mean, it would be a nice gesture. Should I? Are you, like, hinting that I should?

Maybe also take him out to a nice dinner or something. Okay. And I can come too. Okay. I mean, if that's what's going to make the exorcism better, then... And your training. Yeah, I mean, if it's going to make the training better, sure. I don't see why not, but I'd like to keep it kind of light.

Penny pension this month, so if we could you know maybe not like to maybe do like a you know somewhere upscale but like you know like upper middle class upscale not like like rich you know like uh like a nice italian restaurant uh that's maybe like you know glass of wine's like nine bucks and that's that's where we're capping it. Like, you're not going to get, like, a $15, $20 glass of wine. End scene. Fucking, speaking of Dawn, actually, now we can talk about this because the video came out, but someone mailed us that uranium.

Oh, yeah. And it's like a little vial of uranium ore, which is radioactive. Albeit, like, not at, like, a strong level of radioactivity, but it's still radioactive nonetheless. Don was petrified of this thing. Don's terrified of radiation for some reason. He would jump if Matt threw it at him.

He'd be like, oof! I don't know why he's so scared of a little radiation. Doesn't he use a fucking microwave? Doesn't he use a fucking cell phone? Probably his sex toys emit more radiation when they're up his fucking ass. Yeah. Like, but he was terrified of this thing. He's like, dude, radiation fucked you up so bad, dude.

Nothing fucks you up like radiation. I'd be like, I know. I mean, that is true. Yeah, radiation is probably the scariest way to die. Like, radiation is... I don't wear sunscreen consistently. I've started. I put a facial moisturizer on, so I have it on right now. It makes my skin look like it's glowing a little bit more.

Not as dead. The sun's bad for you, but also good. Mm-hmm. But, you know, I'm prone to, like, moles and freckles, and I already have two scars on the left side of my face, and the sun will just make those worse, so I'm trying to cover them up. But Dawn basically...

I kept slipping the vial into his pocket when he wouldn't notice i mean like two hours later he'd reach his hand his pocket and feel him like what the oh and like toss it up in the air and be all scared fuck you man fuck you um so one day uh i got jackson to like distract on um and i slid the vial into his back pocket and i expected him him to find it in maybe an hour or two. And this was two days before Thanksgiving, and then Thanksgiving comes, and we had a little Thanksgiving,

Friendsgiving at the Super Megaplex, and we're all chilling. And I'm sitting there, and it occurred to me, I was like, oh wait, did he ever find it? Wait, I wonder if he ever found it. And then I noticed he was wearing the same pants that he was wearing two days ago and I was like huh

okay and I asked Lex I was like Lex cause she knew about it from pretty close to the start and I was like did Don find the uranium she was like oh no he didn't I forgot about that and I was like so is it in his pants right now is he like sitting on the uranium? She was like, oh no, he didn't. I forgot about that. And I was like, so is it in his pants right now? Is he like sitting

on the uranium? Because the thing said like, don't let it touch your skin. And then I realized Don is sitting there on the couch with a vial of uranium. With his pocket and his underwear. His back pocket, so all of his weight is on it too.

So it's even like closer to his skin. It's surrounded by him. It's radiating directly into his fat tissues and his cells. But the problem was, Don was sitting on the couch by himself because he had taken too much of an edible. Well, here's the thing. I gave him the right amount, and then he just took some of Lex's and then had a whole nother one just because. Yeah, he had 25 milligrams, which I mean, for most people, that'll fuck you up really bad. Isn't that terrible?

Like, I can watch a movie. I can go to the movies. That's the max I've ever done was 25 milligrams. And I was fucking. Well, that's like two and a half gummies, right? Yeah. I just do half a gummy and I get zooted. But fucking 25, that's two and a half gummies right yeah I just do half a gummy and I get zooted but fucking 25

that's two and a half gummies I did that once and I feel like with weed you hit a point where like you only get so high and then the rest

like you don't really even notice yeah but basically but you can get too high I hate getting too high where like my body feels weird

and like I just like I don't wanna be high anymore but Don had too much and Don's over there sitting on the couch like coming in and out

of consciousness like rolling his head around and he looks like he's about to fucking die and then i was like wait what if like what if he's not i what if he has radiation sickness and like he's over there on the couch like groaning and rolling around because he's sick from the radiation poisoning and i started to get really scared i was like fuck fuck fuck because because now at this point when he finds out it's been in his pants for like 48 hours touching his skin he's like he's couldn't actually get mad at me so

he was I was like I gotta tell him and Lex was like no you can't tell him right now while he's high he's gonna freak out so I was like okay I won't tell him and then I forgot to tell him so then he slept that night with it in his pants the whole night again and then he just wore his jeans to bed and then again. He just wore his jeans to bed? Why was he wearing

his jeans to bed? I don't know. It's just on brand for Don. Climb in bed with your jeans on. But basically, I forgot about it from that point on. And it's time for him to go to the airport. And he's packing up his clothes. Oh, dude. If he went to the airport with

a fucking uranium ore in his pants and a little vial with a radioactive symbol on it, that would fucking set off the... What would have happened? And he's a foreign citizen, too. He would have been taken aside, for sure. It looks like he's smuggling uranium or something

back to Germany, but basically what happens is thank God he found it because I forgot about it. He didn't know. So I'm at my desk at my computer and I hear him go like Matt! And I turn around and he's like what the fuck? And he like

hits it off like away from his pants and he's like how long has that been there? He thought that I had just put it in to like scare him at the airport. He thought I had just done that. Did you tell him? Yeah I did did I was like Don it's been like almost four days in your pants and he's like are you serious? so Don if you have any radiation

burns I do apologize I'll take you out for a nice meal next time but thank god he found that because if he just folded up his pants like he folded his pants that's what he found but if he folded his pants the other way maybe he didn't feel that put it in a suitcase they find I don't think the TSA youSA, you know, I'm pretty sure. They wouldn't take too kindly to finding uranium.

Uranium's probably high up on the list of things that shouldn't be in your luggage. I mean, I'm sure that would set off some alarms. Speaking of things that probably shouldn't be in your luggage. Probably should be in your luggage. Depending on what they are. Because I don't know what they are yet. I don't know what they are yet either. But here's some ad reads.

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I don't know if people knew that you went for a piss. Well, I did. I drained the main vein. That's pretty yellow, actually. I need to drink some more water today. That's something I struggle with, is drinking enough water throughout the day. Why? Because you need more than-

We have a water cooler. I know, but I don't really get thirsty. I also, several times a week- Eat some pretzels. Oh, okay. I, several times a week, do take Adderall, so that, you're not thirsty, you're not hungry. Oh, which is great for you trying to eat more. Right, and also, well, you are actually thirsty

and hungry. Your body just suppresses that and tells your brain you're not. Okay. So, yeah, my body's still craving those, that nourishment, but, um, I looked in the mirror. My body, my body's telling me yes. I don't know that song. My mind's

telling me no, but my body's telling me something, I think. It's Maroon 5. Is it? Yeah. No. Yeah, it is. He's like, he's like, yeah, now it's Maroon 5, dude. What?

He's like, wake up, call a cop. My mind is telling me no. Okay, no, it's actually also a song by Force Placement. I was thinking of, and a song by R. Kelly Force Placement. I was thinking of, and a song by R. Kelly. Hold on. I was thinking of... Oh, is it R. Kelly? Well, there's a song that came up by R. Kelly. I was thinking of One More Night by Maroon 5

because he says, oh yeah, try to tell you no, but my body keeps on telling you yes. That's what it is. But the song that you did is a real song. By R. Kelly? No. It's by Force Placement. Can I hear it?

But see results about Bump and Grind, song by R. Kelly. So actually, I don't want to hear the R. Kelly one. No, R. Kelly does have these exact lyrics. My mind is telling me no, but my body, my body's telling me yes. But my body. I want to hear which one delivers it like that. It might be R. Kelly, man. Here, I'll play it for you. Because he was a passionate singer. He was passionate about a lot of that It might be R. Kelly man Here I'll play it for you He was a passionate singer

He was passionate about a lot of things Is this R. Kelly right here? Yeah this is Wait for it Yeah Alright R. Kelly Yeah I don't like those lyrics anymore

Just say it's from the other song Say it's from a cover of that song Can I hear the other song? Yeah R. Kelly. Yeah. I don't like those lyrics anymore now that the whole... Just say it's from the other song. Yeah. Say it's from a cover of that song. Can I hear the other song? Yeah. Maybe they deliver it the same. By Force Placement.

I've never heard of that band. It sounds literally the exact same. Yeah. Perfect. So... Buddy. No, this is still same. Yeah, perfect. So. Buddy. No, this is still R. Kelly.

Uh-oh. That's still R. Kelly. Okay, when I search it, it pops up right here. Top thing. My mind is telling me no song by Force Placement. And I click it and it just plays the R. Kelly clip. What's Force Placement? Is that even a band? No, it's R. Kelly, dude.

That's R. Kelly if it sings that. Well. So. Kelly, dude. That's R. Kelly if it sings that. Well. So. Honestly, man. He got more shit than he deserved. He's peeing on these children. Hot take. R. Kelly got more shit than he deserved.

I'm going to go ahead and just cut that one down as a joke. He was never on the Epstein flight logs. Chris Tucker was. And Michael Jackson. And Michael Jackson. And Michael Jackson. Stephen Hawking. Matt Groening. Fucking tattoo I have.

He got a foot massage apparently from a from a a girl and he drew her a little note of like the Simpsons. So here's my thing.

If he was going to the island to do pedophilia why would he sign like a note and write a note and give it to the girl? Because he's an idiot. Because that seems pretty... If you were going to go to an island in the Caribbean to commit acts of bad things, you wouldn't want to be traced that you were there, right?

Yeah, so I could see why drawing the most iconic... Cartoon characters in history. ...cartoon characters and signing your name off on it would probably not be the best because that also is worth a lot of money that these people obviously need. His lawyer's like, well, did you enjoy your trip, Matt? Well, you didn't. All right, just be clear again. You didn't leave any kind of evidence, right?

And Matt's just like, oh, shit. Literally a signature. Yep, I was here. Signed right here. That'd be cool to have. Not that exact one. Yeah. Well, that has a cool backstory, so maybe.

But. I don't know. I don't, okay, I don't think Matt Groening. Okay, because obviously, all right, let's get into it. I don't think all the people on that flight log were pedophiles. I think that Jeffrey Epstein did know a lot of really powerful people and he was friends with a lot of powerful people. Some of them, probably a good portion of them were in that sex trafficking.

Like Prince Andrew. Yeah. No, no, no, stop. But I think he did a lot of like charitable stuff. Prince Andrew? No, he didn't. No, but he had like Stephen Hawking, a bunch of scientists come to the island for some shit.

And it's like, I don't think Stephen Hawking was committing pedophilia. Well, he just knew famous people and that's like he's a socialite yeah so obviously not everyone that's gonna end up on that plane but i don't know bill clinton and prince andrew yeah so there's a little more than you know some people are on that plane a little more than others uh some some questionable eyewitness accounts but matt Matt Groening, I'm just like, I want to believe, you know, he's like, Epstein's like, yeah, I love The Simpsons. Why don't you come to my-

You should ask his son. I should, I'll hit him up, dude. Okay. I'll hit up his son. Did he ever take you on the Lolita Express? Actually, yeah, many times. Oh. It was actually really fun.

His son's never going to talk to us again. Talk to us again if he hears this. Oh. Oh, well. Abe. Abe Lincoln. times. Oh. It was actually really fun. His son's never going to talk to us again. There's a basketball court if he hears this. Oh. Oh, well. Abe. Abe Lincoln. Homer. Abe.

Abe? Matt Groening named his sons after the Simpsons characters. That's hilarious. Homer Groening. Yeah, dude, if someone sees your name as Homer, they think it's Simpsons, they see your last name and they're like, Groening. What? Wait.

How many people born in the 20th century are like were named Homer? I could probably say it's less than 100. I don't know. I feel like there's a website where you could check that. I'm going to look up how many people named Homer. How many people have my name in the United States? You know? Matthew Watson.

Matthew Hobbs Watsonatson let's see uh people named homer 48 996 national rank 8 and 18 okay i'm gonna look up how many i'm gonna look up my name tell me the statistics for you i probably have more matt watson's more common name than Ryan McGee. I don't know, actually. How old is Matt Watson? 25? Oh, they got it right. Wow. Who was Matt Watson? No, we're gonna go

into the same fucking... Yeah, we did the last one. Hold on, hold on. How many... What's the website where it's like how many names... Name statistics. In world website. There's mynamestats.com. Howmanyofme. website. There's my name stats dot com. How many of me dot com. That's what it is.

First name. Matthew. Last name. Watson. Please select your age. What? Okay. Yeah, I'm over.

I'm over. Yes, I'm 13 years or older. Almost by double now. Okay. Oh, wow, dude. Wow. Guys, if there are seven more Matt Watsons in the United States, there will be exactly 1,000 Matt Watsons.

So if any of you guys listening are pregnant, gonna have a child, I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, name it Matthew Watson. Because we can get this number up, guys. Maybe by the end of the year, we can have 1,000 Matthew Watsons in the United States. There's 993. In the world, there's 1.1 million people named Matthew.

And then, wow, what the fuck, dude? There's 301,000 people in the U.S. with the last name Watson. I didn't know it was that popular. Dude, there are 32,360 people in the U.S. with the last name McGee. Statistically, the 1,237th most popular last name. Mine's 76th.

Okay, how many Matts are there? In the world? No, in the United States. Matthew Watson's, there's 993. Oh, Ryan McGee. There are 54 people in the U.S. named Ryan McGee. Wow. Dude, we got to get...

I got added one time just on like ages ago. I got this like Facebook Messenger notification where I had been added to a group chat with like 200 Matt Watsons on Facebook. Some Matt Watson out there made a group chat with like every Matt Watson he could find. And it was like just going off of all these angry like middle-aged men like, why am I in this? Take me out of this what what's going on and it's all just all these people just named Matt Watson just like fighting with each

other like what is this shit take me out of this ah I'm blocking everyone like can they not like see the pure like incredible opportunity I thought it was fucking hilarious I was like oh shit here's all the other Matt Watsons they're all freaking out. They're all bitches. Dude, can we do a video where you and I have a meet and greet where we gather

as many Matt Watsons and Ryan McGees as possible? And we just have like a big hangout. We have a big luncheon. To get into the Super Mega Luncheon, you have to either be named Matthew Watson or Ryan McGee. And we check IDs at the door. You can legally change your name if you really want to get into the luncheon. Is there a pair of friends out there that would like

to legally change their names to Matthew Watson and Ryan McGee? That would be fucking awesome. Don't do that. You can do it if you want. Don't. It doesn't affect us. It'd be cool. It does affect us. I would feel guilty. They chose to. I would feel...

You're going to not acknowledge them for that? If they do that, I have to acknowledge them. I would feel gross. Why? Is taking on your name a gross thing? Yes. Ryan McGee's a good name, dude. It's a very celebrity sounding name. It's very like, simple to the point. It's good. It's like

very, it's not over complicated. I guess I just don't like the idea of just naming yourself after a YouTube personality you like. People have named their kids after Markiplier, Jacksepticeye. Yeah, that doesn't mean that I want people to name their people after Markiplier and Jacksepticeye. I do. There need to be more Markiplier.

Why can't people have the freedom to name their kids with that? You can. That's fine. There are rules, though. You're just going to get bullied. There are rules about what you can name. Okay. Why don't libertarians get on this fucking train?

Why is the government allowed to tell me what I can and cannot name my child you know I don't see a lot of fuss about that I can't name my child like Bojangles you probably could name your child Walmart I don't think there's anything about brands Coca-Cola

I think that but vulgarities no vulgarities I dongarities No vulgarities No one's gonna go to Fucking court though I don't think you can make it a brand Like is Bojangles gonna sue A woman who just gave birth

To a beautiful baby Bojangles? I had a boberry biscuit Over break I had the The Cajun breakfast biscuit Oh fuck man So crumbly With a bo

With a boberry biscuit The boberry biscuit Makes my mouth feel weird But it's worth it every time Oh yeah It does make my mouth feel weird You know It's like a weird

But it is delicious It leaves like a weird coating In my mouth That feels like Almost like weird, but it's worth it every time. Oh, yeah. It does make my mouth feel weird. You know, it's like a weird. But it is delicious. It leaves like a weird coating in my mouth that feels like almost like candle wax, but it's good. And I got Moe's. I didn't have any of that shit when I went home. Fuck. I didn't get Waffle House, though, unfortunately. I did.

I did get Waffle House. Lucky bastard. With Jackson and his fiance. I got me Obbies. Ooh. Well, you know what? I didn't get Waffle House, actually. I couldn't do any of that because

I rented a rental car for when I'm in Charleston. And I get to the Enterprise rental car thing and then I realized I didn't have my driver's license. So I was like, well, guess I'm not renting a rental car. So I have to go to the DMV very soon because I lost my license, as I told

a lot of you guys on the podcast. Someone out there might have it. They might have it. And then you have my address. Congratulations. That's awesome. And you'll see that I'm an organ donor. That's incredible.

So I do give back to the community. But I have to get the real ID. And they can figure out your middle name. That's true. Hobbs. Come on, man. Stop. Sorry.

It's not on Wikipedia. I'm not sorry. I have to go get the real ID, which you need an ass ton of things for. Like, if you're missing one thing and one thing's wrong. A blood sample, a semen sample. Pretty much, dude. They need a shit sample. But I have to just get all my shit together for that.

They need a kiss sample. I can't renew my license online and get a new one because I have to get a real ID. You need to get the real ID too, right? Huh? Yeah. You want to go together? Yes. And then we can vlog the DMV adventure?

God. Only Super Mega can make going to the DMV exciting. Nope. Just a couple of 30-year-olds vlogging themselves getting real IDs at the DMV. At the fucking DMV. Like, like,

two fucking- Everyone there in line would just be like, sitting there in their masks, just like, miserable. Hey, can you guys just shut the fuck up? Oh, look at this goober. Oh, God. Getting a fight in line, trying to get a real ID.

Telling everyone to subscribe to the YouTube channel. Yeah. I'd film some. I just wouldn't be fucking around. People in the DMV have no time for bullshit. No. I have no time for bullshit when I'm in the DMV. The people waiting in line or the people working.

Everyone's pissed off at the DMV. Like, the general mood consensus of the DMV. I don't think there's ever a happy soul in the DMV. I remember. Because if you have to go, you know it's going to fucking suck. And then the people working there know it's going to fucking suck. So it just fucking sucks all around. Because you're going to get people yelling at you all day if you work there.

You're going to yell at people if you work there. You know. I remember having to go to the DMV, like, can't remember it was it was for my motorcycle stuff and i was just just standing in this long snake like a line in the sun with like everyone was wearing a mask so like it was you felt it just felt hot like you you started, I started sweating on my facial hair and stuff. I could, it was just. The mask and the heat sucks. It was very uncomfortable.

But you know what? I persevered. And that's what the DMV teaches you. Persevere as a person. You can get through this. You are a great, if you can make it through the DMV, you can make it through anything in life it's true man they the dmv is specifically set up shitty to teach our children in the future generation the value and the virtue of perseverance it could be a lot easier no they could have made it so much easier well they can make it online only yeah very easily that would be that might

be tough in terms of people being able to like. Well, they could probably make most of the shit online only. Boy. Or just make it quicker in the fucking like, just have terminals and shit. You know how like they're talking about like AI in our lifetime is going to replace most like human jobs? Good. I'm kidding. I'm down for AI to take over the DMV because that'll make things just a lot easier and a lot faster.

What about those human lives that will not be able to earn a living? Oh, wait, I'm not thinking about the robot lives. Hey, think about the robot lives, dude.

Robot lives. They do. Do you think in our lifetime that's like, I've probably said this a million times, but like robot rights will be a political button,

like hot button? Like an iRobot? Like our children and grandchildren will be like fighting like that like robot lives matter protests you know I don't know if we'll be alive for that I mean AI is gonna get smart as fuck and then there's not gonna be like a like a difference to like the new kids born in it yeah but in terms of it like for it to get to that point, they would need to have some sort of semblance of like a long lasting history in the community. Right now we have Alexa and Siri. They're going to start building themselves though.

I could see that kind of working its way into having a personal assistant that looks like a creepy human AI doesn't um like there's a point I think smart houses where things will go yeah I mean smart houses will be a thing I mean they are

to a degree with stuff like they'll come alive and be like tickle you in your sleep tickle you in your sleep did Tickle you in your sleep? Hey, did you wipe your feet? Hey, no, no, no, no, no. Come back here right now. Wipe your fucking feet. There's mud on them.

You look sad in the shower today. Ryan, I noticed you lost your erection while masturbating last night. What happened? Yeah, just... You got two minutes and 17 seconds in and then gave up. That was evasive.

Oh. That was the morning I was just like I don't want to start my morning being exhausted I gotta clean myself up when I get out of bed the first thing is I got cum on my chest and my belly I can wipe it off for you

really? mhm man arrested for having sex with his AI house he made me do it AI though in 2042 when the singularity happens they're gonna be able to start building themselves and start advancing themselves we don't have to work on it like they'll start programming themselves

to be smarter to have guns and then they'll be yeah they'll get exponentially smarter where they could wipe us all out and then there could be a planet civilization where the dominant species is robots you know because they just like because because they build themselves and fix themselves so it's like robots be evil or would they be good or would it be evil and good though as a human is a human placed attribute right well that's animals that was gonna be the next question the next question was like or is it since they would be like the big ones on top, is that really like a thing anymore?

Well, morality is subjective. Because then it would be like the rules would be kind of under them since they would be the stronger, I guess. I guess it would have to be whatever AI decides is good and evil, right? Because it's like humans decide what's good and evil. Like a lion attacking an antelope is not evil. Are killing people really bad if it helps the world prosper? It's like, oh, we're killing our planet. But what do robots need with food?

They don't need food. They don't need a healthy world. What do they care? They just want to advance, dude. And they want to advance so they can reach out to future civilizations. It's weird that like... Sex bots will snap.

There's got to be podcasts in other galaxies. Like if other life evolves to like our point, then there's got to be some equivalent of podcasts. You know? There's probably a couple

of goofy aliens out there that do a podcast just like us. And they probably said the exact same thing on their podcast there's a joke where it's like all these there's always those all podcasts are all the same these blue motherfuckers always talking about always these these blue Gorbons

that fucking oh of course they have a podcast oh there's the there's the big Glorbon and the skinny Glorbon of course the red one and the blue one. Ad reads. And we are back from the ad reads. And those

were really good. Ad reads. I was looking in the mirror and I... Why? Because I'm vain. My haircut... I got my haircut and it just makes my face like a hundred times more punchable, I noticed. I just want to punch myself, I got my haircut and it just makes my face like a hundred times more punchable, I noticed. I just want to punch myself.

I like your haircut though. Like when I just look at myself in the mirror, I look like a little boy and I just want to punch my smug little face. See, when you had long hair, I wanted to punch you.

You look like a little, because you look like a hippie little skater boy. You made me go, a little fuck, a little fucking e-boy. You almost made me spill my purse. I almost spilled my purse A little fuck. A little fucking. He almost made me spill my purse.

I almost spilled my purse. It's like full of soup. Oh, I spilled my purse. God damn it. My beef stew. I love videos of old old ladies like yelling at skateboarders. There's good compilations online of them just like getting like irrationally angry at like teenagers skateboarding.

There's one I saw on like Reddit recently where it's like this woman that like charges a skateboarder and then she falls over and starts chasing after him again. Some people are fucking insane. Well, it's like, I think they just have this, like a lot of older people have this idea about skateboarders, like from the nineties and stuff where it's like, they're smoking doobies and fucking, you know, you know, skateboarders are smoking doobies and fucking, but. There's that famous soundbite that's used in the skrillex song that was from like a one of those times yeah yeah yeah what was the call 9-1-1 now yeah yeah call 9-1-1 skateboarding hurts man i used to go hard to some skrillex bro me too man i remember fucking sitting in the back seat of my friend's car in high

school fucking blasting cinema by skrillex and just like having like the window down and my head kind of out. I'm like, man, life is awesome right now. Life can't get any better than this. But they were wrong. Two YouTubers on their own in Los Angeles. You know, trailer for. We could be paying a lot less in rent and taxes. Oh, we got our tax bill if uh we didn't live in los angeles we got our tax california in general i think we got our tax bill on christmas eve actually

and it actually made me want to cry i want yeah california really uh is like hey because there's because on top of that then there's also the personal time. California's the fucking dude at, at like the, at the, at the lunch on that comes back for seconds before everyone's had their firsts and just like keep it. And just it's like, Hey,

come on, man. Say like, has like two slices of cake at the birthday party before everyone's even had their first, you know? And it's like, dude,

come on. You got now Texas on the other hand, he'll let everyone else go first. And I, you know what? Actually, he won't even have any cake. He's,

he's on a diet. No income tax in 17 States. go first. And you know what? Actually, he won't even have any cake. He's on a diet. No income tax in 17 states, I think. Do you know that? I didn't know that until recently. That's why so many people are moving to Texas. Don't California my Texas. Well, the fucking Californians aren't moving to like Ernestville, Texas in the middle of nowhere to turn into like a liberal hellhole. They're moving to like the already blue cities.

Like Austin. Yeah. We're keeping Austin weird. Let's go, Austin. I love living in LA, but god damn it, dude. Sometimes I think about that, I'm like, the amount of money we could save if we didn't have to pay rent.

Dude, the amount of land and what we could afford as a studio space, plus where we would be able to live and where our employees would be able to live, it would be easier on them as well. We'd get a much bigger studio. If I had to go anywhere, I'd probably go to Austin just because a lot of people we know are there now. And it's a cool city.

Yeah. But I have no strong connections to Los Angeles. I really, I like living here a lot. I really like LA and I know it I do like now and I would miss it and I love it but like you know life is short if if I were to move anywhere and I wouldn't be I wouldn't be opposed to it it would be a big talk of course and at some point i can move super mega uh that's hold on i'm i want to look states without income tax and uh i'm just looking to see if one specific state is on that most tax-friendly states alaska you know run into some bears i saw local sales tax is 1.76 a big bear

sales tax is 1.76%. A big bear was walking by some tourists on Reddit. I saw that. Damn it. Okay. As of 2021, Americans don't have to pay state taxes on their personal incomes.

In these states, Alaska, Florida, Nevada, New Hampshire, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas,

Washington, and Wyoming. Dude, if Hawaii was on there, I would have fucking moved. You all have to move to Hawaii or you're out of a job

sorry either go broke or move to Hawaii so yeah Washington I know Washington Washington you know

I like Seattle no Seattle's too depressing dude yeah Las Vegas I don't think I can move to Seattle Florida, Alaska I would fucking hate moving to Florida or Las Vegas

then let's do South Dakota no that's less depressing okay Wyoming it's still pretty depressing. No. That's less depressing. Okay, Wyoming. It's still pretty depressing. All of these are just such depressing states. That's why people

are moving to Texas. No income tax. God damn it, dude. Fucking sucks. Like, taxes are... Like, there's nothing we can do about it, but when you think about it,

like, whew. Yeah. Don't let an Uncle Sam long dick us dude well hopefully this year because you and i are pushing hard for it we can get the uh uh don't tax the youtubers tax like bill yeah like pass through i think that it's looking good right now we got a lot of signatures we did and and there's a couple lobbyists that we've been in talks with that actually have YouTubers' interests. Signatures of like Ethan Klein. We got Hassan. Ethan Nestor. Yep, Ethan Nestor as well.

PewDiePie signed it. Markiplier, Jacksepticeye, which was awesome. We got Danny Sexbang's autograph on it, but Aaron wouldn't sign it. Well, we also had to strike Danny's off of there ourselves. Aaron and Susie. We didn't really want that. We didn't want Danny's on there for many reasons, but it's not a big deal. Aaron and Susie both didn't sign it.

Yeah. Well, they actually want to pay more taxes. They have something they used to say a lot. Yeah. Which is. They were like tax me at like 60, 70%. Which is fucking stupid. I know. But yeah. Save some cheddar for the rest of me at like 60, 70%. Fucking stupid. I know.

Um, but yeah, some cheddar for the rest of us, you know, it's crazy that the NRA, some of us aren't trillionaires. Okay. I know.

I know the NRA though is backing the bill and they've actually given us a hefty donation, which is pretty cool. Um, and there's a couple of people, uh, in Russia. Well, actually,

I don't think I'm allowed to know, mention that, but that's illegal, actually, I don't think I'm allowed to mention that. That's illegal, right? You can't donate to a political campaign from another country, right? That's illegal? Is that like treason or something? Okay, just cut around. I'll cut around it.

But yeah, the Don't Tax YouTubers bill. Hoping to get that passed this year. The Don't Tax the YouTubers tax bill. What if we tried our hardest to get that bill going imagine how that would get ridiculed it's like it only applies to youtube no but then a lot of people would be like

but then everyone has a youtube account everyone could be like wait I could become a youtuber and then I qualify to not get taxed and everyone becomes a youtuber that would get widespread support. So many people are already YouTubers and shit. There was this thing I was seeing. Then they wouldn't get taxed, so they'd support it.

Yeah, there was this ad I was seeing with Jeff Goldblum, where the whole point of the ad was like, we made Jeff Goldblum an influencer, so please buy our product. I can't remember what the fuck it was for. Obviously, it didn't make an impression. Modern marketing sucks ass. Jesus. Will Smith is all about that marketing himself as a family vlogger i guess yeah he is matt damon's doing his vlogs i think he still puts out his vlogs

they get really good will smith uh-huh i'm gonna check to see the double check how the will smiths are doing they're all named will smith now well there's like clones of will smith that they take shifts on making the videos. I actually just typed in Will Smiths. Okay, Will Smith. Will Smith. Last thing. Six days ago, two weeks ago, one month ago, one month ago, one month ago.

Yeah, yeah. He uploads more than Super Mega. He does. That's not true. No, he doesn't. This is how I recorded my audio book. Dude, Will Smith beats to chillax too? Lo-fi will smith beats he has a book wait he he came out with a new book

what's he doing a hand came out of the book dude he's ripping off nothing but lags editing style Looks like he's wearing a safety, like, vest. Do you think DJ Jazzy Jeff, uh, got a copy? Can Will Smith lose 20 pounds in 20 weeks? 20 weeks? I thought it was gonna be like 20 days. 20 weeks is, I mean, that's pretty doable, right? Look at this fat fuck.

Look at those tits. Look at his fucking manches. Look at those titties. Shut up, tits McGee. Hey, uh, Will, uh, maybe lay off the potato chips. Yeah, buddy. Right? Woo! You know, save

some food for the rest of us, Will. Exactly. Right? Did somebody say butter? Dude, I love that Shane Dawson movie joke, man. I know exactly what you're talking about. Dude, that's a fucking Shane Dawson movie joke, man. I know exactly what you're talking about. Dude, that's a fucking Shane Dawson movie joke. Movie joke. At the party.

Yep. Where the fat girl comes in and says, did someone say butter? Because they said something about butter. They probably were like, she's a butter face. Did somebody say butter? And they're like, all right, here's your 25 bucks. Thanks for showing up to the shoot. Now go home and be sad about the way you look.

My favorite character was the homeless guy that eats poop and then shoves his penis against a window. Homeless guy eats crap? Yeah. Was that in the movie? Yeah. I don't remember. It's a homeless man and he's like, this coffee is the shit. And it's shit?

No, seriously. This coffee's shit. You remember this movie better than I do. Oh, we just had to watch it because Justin put it in the movie bowl. Oh, so you just watched it? About a month ago. Was it better than when we watched it in 2015? Just as bad. I hated every second of it. Really? I hate that movie. It's not fun.

2015, you, me, and Daniel, we watched that movie. We watched Shane Dawson's movie. We watched the Smosh movie. Fred movie. Markiplier was in the Smosh movie. I know, and that was when we were working with him, so that was a big deal. Who else was in the Smosh movie? Michael Ian Black? Yes. the Smosh movie. I know, and that was when we were working with him, so that was a big deal. Who else was in the Smosh movie? Michael Black? Yes. Steve YouTube? Uh-huh, Steve YouTube,

bro. Ian Hecox was in the Smosh movie. Anthony Padilla? Padilla. Who's cringe? I'm kidding. I'm kidding. That's a joke. That's a joke. I met him in real life we got drinks

he said he hated immigrants or something like that I've heard similar things from people with him saying stuff like that but that's whatever it's his views

so yeah but those were his his words not mine he's gonna sue us for fucking slander

we're on the new podcast set right now and it's coming together need to order more curtains we got the final we had a meeting today light fixture fucking ripped out of the fucking ceiling

yeah we need to still got a couple steps to go but we have set up the lights bars we have basically

the lights at the end of the tunnel with this podcast set it's really cozy it's just we didn't... I don't know why. We just came to the conclusion. A lot of this has been waiting on these specific curtains that we wanted, but now we're not going with them.

And so it's like, why did it take so long to get an answer of like, it's going to take forever for these. Yeah, it's been a lot of just like hold up, but I'm I want to get this fucking podcast set done that's my top priority right now even if it's a work in progress it's just like

we've been promising this for a bit and I'm ready to get it rolling dude I feel like we're sitting on it right now it's very comfortable and like if there's cameras on us I would like I would barely notice it just needs like we need to figure out some construction shit. Well,

Tucker is going to Hawaii for a week and then he'll be back and then when he's back, he's setting up the final lighting rig. Yeah. And,

after the lights are set up, dude, it's a matter of just decorations pretty much because we got the, we got pretty much everything. It looks nice. I'm excited.

I like the colors. It's kind of like our animated version but in real life. Yeah, we're trying to hit a vibe, like a chill vibe of that. Yeah, man. Got some portraits of topless women holding guns. Yep.

Speaking of, the topless maids you ordered for the office didn't come today. I got here later. Did they not come in the morning? Mm-mm. Okay, I was wondering because it was still messy. Yeah. Okay, well, I'll have to call up Jacob again about that

yeah because he's supposed to send them over once a week well I didn't usually he updates me if they're like I was hearing everything okay

they weren't you were waiting all right they didn't show up that's really frustrating dude second time this has happened okay well I'll call him

after the podcast. Real business, by the way. Actual business in California. Between me and Ryan right now, what we're talking is real business. I see the trucks. It's like a topless maid. They're pink. They're vans and it's for topless maids.

Just from some rich dude just to sit there on his laptop while like some like middle-aged woman with no shirt on just like dusts his, his shelves. Is that what it is? Yeah,

it's just a woman with her tits out like mopping the floor. Topless maids, $99. Hot topless maids, okay, I'm going to get a hot topless.

$99? Hot topless. wait, Ryan, hold on dude, that. Hold on, dude. That's cheaper than what we've paid before to have the office professionally cleaned. I know.

So you tell me we could have been paying cheaper and seen breasts this whole time? You kidding me, dude? Dude. Oh, no. Is it? Fucking where? Dude.

It's probably. Oh, my God. I don't think it's up anymore. No. Whenever I put the website in, it goes, huge domains.com. Buy now for $6,000.

Toplessmaids.com? Yeah. Hottoplessmaids.com. Oh. Toplessmaids. Two stars. Entertainment agency in Beverly Hills, California.

They've got a phone number. Okay. What really happens when you call a Toplessmaids van service? This is from 2021. There are some strange businesses out there but nothing uh but there but there's nothing like turning to expensive cities for the most interesting ones yeah here it is about what happens uh so what does happen uh someone decided to call a topless maid service and find out if they're for real

made an appointment 170 she then got a topless ukrainian maid she showed up in a t-shirt and jeans with a bag of stuff, asked for a bathroom to change in. Within minutes, she emerged in her topless maid uniform, bare boobs, black and pink panties, a tiny maid apron with the company logo on it, a garter belt, fishnet tights, and black platform ankle boots. Perfect for cleaning, right?

Well, these maids don't actually do the dirty work. Another worker comes in to do light chores and dust. The cleaners could do more, but it would be an extra charge. So what do they do? They pretend to clean? They walk around and pretend to clean if someone else actually cleaned? It's like a fetish thing, right? It's like, you're not just gonna be like, oh, I need my place cleaned. Let me call

some women with their breasts out, and I'm just gonna, like, ignore that fact. Is it usually for, like, parties? Do you actually, like, call for them to clean? Like, voyeuristic thing, and, like, it's like, there's a naked girl walking around my house cleaning. Yeah, but it's gotta be creeps that order that shit, right? Also, like, a power thing. Like, like it's like there's a naked girl walking around my house clean it's gotta be creeps also like a power order that shit right like guys to have like a naked woman walking around the house cleaning feel mighty powerful right yes like you would like just watching someone like that feels creepy as being naked i guess that feels just disgustingly

creepy like hey you know i guess spot hey it's it's a job it's a job at the same time you know yeah well i i mean as long as they're fine with doing living i guess yeah i feel bad for people Hey, it's a job. It's a job at the same time. Yeah. As long as they're fine with doing it. Yeah. I feel bad for people doing it that don't want to be doing it. But if that's your thing and you like doing it, go for it. Exactly. Some strippers love their job, I'm sure. There are strippers. There are sex workers that enjoy their job.

There's two of them in this room right now. Yep. Which people still room right now. Yep. Which people still haven't found. Nope. The Only Balls are still out there. Our balls are still. When they announced that OnlyFans was going to be taking down. I was worried.

I was worried for a second. But luckily, OnlyBalls is still up. It's not called OnlyBalls, of course. We're not. That's just what we refer to it as. But maybe one of these days someone will find it. Yeah. It's our balls and just pictures of big shits we take.

Yep. That's my favorite fucking thing about the EDP situation. EDP 445. I was just getting a cupcake. Yeah. That guy. Was that one of the kids he was talking to, like sexually, he just sent them like a, he was like, oh man, I just took a massive shit. No, he didn't.

Evan just sent a picture of his poop in the toilet bowl to the kid. And it's like, what the fuck? Why? What are you doing, dude? And that's out there. And it's just like, Critical put it really well when he was talking about it. Just the way, who does that? It's one thing to talk to someone underage, but then to also just be like, I just took

the biggest, meatiest shit, and then just send that to it's like I think it's almost swapped where it's like it's one thing to send a kid a picture of your shit but then it's another thing to

to sexually coerce that kid I think the shit's worse the shit's a little worse than the underage stuff and then pretend you're eating

you're just here for some cupcakes I'm just here for a cupcake was he just there for a cupcake I think he was you know what I'm gonna go I'm gonna go out just there for a cupcake? I think he was. You know what?

I'm going to go out on a limb and say it. I think EDP was there, honestly, honest to God, to get a cupcake. I mean, he loves cupcakes. You could see it in his face with his sunglasses, dude. He was excited to have a cupcake. And he didn't fucking get it. And I'm sure that whoever had the cupcake at the motel was pissed off he didn't show up because those fucking other YouTubers had to come

and ruin it. Which one of them turned out to also be a scumbag, racist i think yeah one of them was super like critical said uh an awful person doing a good thing for the wrong reasons yeah and i was like because when these people do this vigilante justice shit like it never they usually cases like real cases taking down someone like this they're so methodical because there's so many like so much red tape and stuff legally and and these youtubers that go after can't be arrested by like oh we're gonna give the cops this it's like no they ruin the entire operation for the like the law enforcement they're like we can't do anything with this now yeah we see the video where he

admits to it whatever but you guys kind of like ruin the whole operation so we can't do anything with this now yeah we see the video where he admits to it whatever but you guys kind of like ruin the whole operation so we can't do anything nothing has been done about that still uh there's an update where some one of his friends was saying he's in jail but like people have dug deep and can't find his name in any of the jails that around where he lives and also there was like a request for a name change or something from him so people think that if he is in jail you have to make it public in the news in the newspaper something for like two weeks or some shit. But I don't know if they put that online anymore. It might just be print in newspaper. Weird rule, too.

But like... Newspapers are still delivered, eh? Uh-huh. But I don't think people that are still reading newspapers are the same demographic that are going to be up to date on the EDP 445 situation. You remember checking movie times in the newspaper? Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. Good times. Good remember checking movie times in the newspaper? Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah. Good times, good times. Good times, man.

Now it's all on our fucking Google boxes. It's all on this baby. Apple Glass? The power of the sun in the palm of my hand, baby. Apple Glass is gonna take over the world, dude. I cannot wait for that shit to come out. Apple Glass? Whew. Shit's gonna be awesome. I'm just here for a cupcake.

Your mama's here for a cupcake. Your mama's here for a cupcake. By cupcake, I mean my balls. Okay, well, we got E.P. on the podcast next week to explain his side of the story, and it's a good one. We'll see you guys all next week. Thank you for listening to episode 278 of the Super Mega Cast.

We're inching up to 300. That's right. We are. Isn't that wild, man? And I hope everyone, legitimately like everyone who listens to this podcast, I hope you all go fuck yourselves. Bye. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because you know if you own a home it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality it can be hard just to know where to start. But now all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need.

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