The Adam and Dr. Drew Show - FUBU, Get Off My Lawn, Mangria and the Tune Out Factor (The Adam and Dr Drew Show Classics)

Episode Date: July 13, 2024

We take it back to the first three episodes of The Adam and Dr. Drew Show where they discuss FUBU Clothing, Mangria and people tuning out all the time. ...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome back to the Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics. I am your host Big Brother Jake aka Jake Warner. My government name. Let's get it cracking. First up is the very first episode that took place on December 4th, 2012. The fellas talk about the correlation of the FUBU clothing line and former President Obama. And Adam has a get off my lawn moment. He always does but this one's special because it's the first time on the first episode. You don't want to miss
Starting point is 00:00:36 this. Check it out. You asked for it. You got it. It's me and Dr. Drew together once again. By popular demand. The first of many. So stay tuned baby because we're going to make this a regular dance. So good seeing you there Dr. Drew. Good to be here. The start of a long, what is that saying from Casablanca? Long relationship. A long beautiful relationship or something like that. All right, couple things. We'll hang each other in a couple weeks. We're all right. I had an interesting moment. Interesting psychologically, you tell me how you handle this. Just all
Starting point is 00:01:15 the people who, all the employees out there that don't like doing their job. I pull up randomly to different places that I own with different people that I employ Yeah in different acts like different the warehouses and yeah, and you never I'm not there that often and there's a There's a pretty good chance. I'm not going to be there, but I do do pull up Yeah, and so a few moments ago I pulled up to the other warehouse and Gary not half-tart Gary the one who works here, but full-tart Gary the one who's working on the thing, I pulled up and he was sitting in his car as I pulled up, not eating lunch or anything, just sitting in his car.
Starting point is 00:01:56 And Gary's an honest guy and I don't look at him as a guy who's trying to rip me off. So I pulled up and my first beat was, great, sitting in the car. Like here I am, it's the middle of the day, he's not eating lunch was, great, sitting in the car. Like, here I am, it's middle of the day, he's not eating lunch, why are you sitting in your car? I'm assuming you're on the clock. And then as I pulled up, and the worst thing you can do, now it's one of these things, it's interesting psychologically, the worst thing you can do is what Gary did, which is see me get out of the car and go back in to do whatever it is he
Starting point is 00:02:25 should have been doing. See, when you're Gary or anyone who's sitting in the car when the boss pulls up, start doing something in your car that looks like it might fall under the heading of official business. Or break, or official break. Or yeah, tilt the seat back and just pop the collar on your shirt and just call it call the night Yeah, don't do the oops you pulled up shit I got to get back to doing because I've now seen the process you see that's the whole thing see if I Pull up ten minutes later, and you're back in the shop
Starting point is 00:02:59 Well, then we're fine Or if I pulled in ten minutes earlier, and you weren't in your car, the worst thing I can see is the transition. Yes, the, oh, you got me. Right. Gotcha, transition. Now whether you're, you know, sitting in your car on the clock or you're trying to, you know, cop a few batteries from the corner drugstore, don't do a big flailing move as you're walking out of the place that draws attention to yourself.
Starting point is 00:03:23 So now as I pull up, Gary sees me and Gary gets out of the place that draws attention to yourself. So now as I pull up, Gary sees me and Gary gets out of the car and walks back into the place and then sort of gets busy. Now I can imagine what ensued. No, no, no. I did not, I did not, there was no, I didn't ask him what he was doing. I know you didn't. I didn't want to shame him but I wanted... I'm sure you gave that Alright Gary. No. No, I didn't give him anything. I just walked. I just walked in and Saw him sort of busily Attempting to look busy once again But anyway again if the boss man pulls up and you're in a position
Starting point is 00:03:59 Stay there. Yeah, stay there for a while because then it seems like yeah, I saw I see a boss man I'm doing whatever it is. I'm supposed to be doing here for even play it like wow, but this looks bad But this looks bad, but I just took a five-minute break. He caught me in it Here's what I did this morning another decent one. Alright, so Drew you came over you brought food Brought you a Filipino food from a patient. I had to pay a sub patients all morning and they brought in lumpia Chris look Chris. He's all into it. Oh, no, is that what you are Maxipata? What you call them Chris Maxipata? It's his name locks a monic. Uh-huh. Oh
Starting point is 00:04:39 You're Filipino part right part part full full 100% Mmm, no, well are those are those is that one of the good ones or the not good ones? Nurses. Oh the nurses, yeah, oh boy. Man. We got all kinds of nurses now. I gotta say, nurse, when I was visiting my dad in the hospital, his nurse was a new gender and a new nationality every single time I pulled into that place right it is wide open it is not like what I'm saying is is when you go through LAX and you go through security at LAX you know what to expect not a lot of not a lot of Swedes now that shift. Same thing at JFK Not the same ethnicity, but a reliable one. But they're very reliable and you've certain jobs
Starting point is 00:05:31 You've you've learned to rely on as a matter of fact At least in LA if the terrorists ever light off a dirty bomb at like LAX It will take out at least three quarters of the black population of Los Angeles I do not believe we'll have enough black people left to actually keep the race we'll have to import black folks because between the guys driving the shuttles and the guys working the bags and the guys working the security it it's pretty much uh... it's it's uh...
Starting point is 00:06:06 it's FUBU over there for us by us baby do you guys have a Filipino FUBU? no the P would be tough to pronounce you'd have to do a PH FUBU do you guys remember FUBU?
Starting point is 00:06:24 yeah I don't think they're so hot anymore Do you guys remember FUBU? Yeah. Yeah. I don't think they're so hot anymore. What? FUBU was popular, seemed like about 10 years ago. It was like all the old black clothing company. It's been a couple weeks since I've been in here. Chris has already had enough of your shit.
Starting point is 00:06:38 I know. I wonder... Have you been working hard? You've been doing a lot of podcasts. That's why he's just had an ass full of you. He's been going out and doing live ones with with us so he's had enough of me. I wonder I wonder if the whole Obama thing has taken the wind out of the sail of the FUBU. You know what I mean? Because you need a little bit of a it's us against the man.
Starting point is 00:06:57 But now once the one of you is the man, there's no more you against the man kind of thing. I'm gonna look at this FUBU. We'll see about buying some stock. All right, so anyway, where were we? Yeah. Oh, ethnicity. Food. So now, a lot of Filipino nurses, right? Why is that, small fingers? Chris, why is that? I don't know. My mom's a nurse. Yeah, it's really... Wow, there you go. Yeah, and they're great. They're excellent nurses too. I don't know. My mom's a nurse. Yeah, it's really... Wow! There you go! Yeah, and they're great. They're excellent nurses, too. I don't know if they just saw an opportunity and really exploited it and then they told their relatives about it and it turned out to be a good thing. It's a good gig, right?
Starting point is 00:07:35 Yeah. I mean, it's a weird gig, but it's a good gig. It's a little intimate for me. You don't like cleaning bedpans and stuff? Oh, all the stuff that's going on. I mean, oh my God, up in there with the catheters and the sheets and the poo and the thing and the that and oh my God. It is a thankless job for nurses too. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:07:56 It really is. They went all the, we take, the physicians take all the liability, but nursing takes all the shit. Literally. The shit jobs. The shit, yeah. Yeah. And. You get little credit for it too. Cause then
Starting point is 00:08:06 when somebody's angry and yelling, who's sitting there? It's like being the receptionist at a restaurant. Right. That's the one that takes the grief. Yeah. Yeah. Except for they're not as hot as the receptionist at the restaurant. But yeah, they're all, and the people, people half out of their mind, they're old, they're angry, they want to get out of bed, they got shit strapped to them and they're taking it out on the nurse. They're old. They're angry. They want to get out of bed. They got shit strapped to them, and they're taking it out on the nurse. Well, then the family doesn't understand the condition there, and they get angry with the nurses
Starting point is 00:08:30 for not allowing them to do what they want to do. Right. Whatever it is. It's always our fault. Right. Right. All right. We have questions.
Starting point is 00:08:36 What else? So you had Filipino food. Yeah, Filipino food. Saw patients all morning. You had one of the nurses brought some Filipino food. She's a patient, actually. She's somebody who runs a sort of in-home supportive care services, and it's her mother I take care of.
Starting point is 00:08:50 And her mother makes me this stuff every time she comes. Really? Oh, she makes it up fresh. Yeah, yeah. Oh, nice. It's good. Man. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:58 I'm sure you brought stuff in for the nurses when your dad was getting good care. I'm sure you every day whip, let him at least whip something up. I couldn't get over two very simple facts about going down to Huntington Memorial in Pasadena, which is a nice hospital. I couldn't get over the fact that there was scratched graffiti all over the elevator where you look at the readout to see what floor you're on.
Starting point is 00:09:27 It was scratched like, take a drywall nail and just scratch your gang whatever in there. And then when I got up to the fourth floor, which is like the intensive care thing, and I went to go use the bathroom, it was scratched into the toilet seat, into the sink, into the dispenser. I'm showing you a picture of a very nice updated hospital that has shit scratched into it utterly and completely. So just for a second, you don't forget that you're a gang-infested piece of shit of a city. Like just for a second, if you thought you were thinking about your dad or your mom or your son
Starting point is 00:10:03 or your daughter or your loved one that is in some horrible condition with some horrible disease for one second if you don't forget for a second you live in one of the world's shittiest dirtiest most fucked up cities so then I got up to the fourth floor and they'd scrape stuff into the toilet seat, into the toilet paper dispenser, into the mirror, into everything. There's the toilet paper dispenser. Now these people are there, theoretically, you wouldn't get up to the fourth floor unless you're visiting somebody that some doctor possibly was putting back together.
Starting point is 00:10:42 It could be a member of your gang that you've scraped into this thing, or it could be your father or a loved one or a son or a daughter. But the point is, is now the time to scratch the shit into the toilet seat? By the way- And when do the beheadings begin?
Starting point is 00:11:00 Like when do we just start fucking putting cameras everywhere and just start fucking lopping people's heads off and go, look, if you are so fucked up, if you are so off mentally that you can't go to a hospital and visit a loved one without saving your life without fucking desecrating, not saving your life, but saving the life of a loved one without fucking desecrating the bathroom. Your fucking head needs to be removed from your fucking shoulders. Welcome back to the Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics. Up next we have, well, since episode one was so much fun, let's take a listen to episode
Starting point is 00:11:44 two. That took place on December 12, 2012, and Adam 1 was so much fun, let's take a listen to episode 2. That took place on December 12, 2012, and Adam talks about the troubles he's been having selling his man, Grea. I love these older episodes. I'm sure you do too. Take a listen. I'm confused by adults, and I bring this up a lot. I don't know what's going on anymore.
Starting point is 00:12:04 Anymore? You've been complaining for 20 years. and I bring this up a lot. I don't know what's going on anymore. I have- Anymore? You've been complaining for 20 years. Oh, maybe you're right. But I'm confused by not only the actions of adults, but just, I just went in and got my haircut. It's the $10 haircut place.
Starting point is 00:12:21 All right. They left off some- I left my beard on. I got a ten dollar haircut. The argument is it looks like thirteen dollars worth of haircut. So I got... I found out while my dad was in the hospital he gets eighty dollar haircuts. But he wants me to pay for his trips to Philadelphia. Interesting. And the lease on his car. Yeah. You don't need to... there's just a little what you call, tells. And if you play poker for a living, like I do, I play poker with life. I just look at little tells. So I went
Starting point is 00:12:52 in there and the same thing, it's the same thing every time. It's a 53 year old guy who who is trying to sort of recaptures youth with all the skull jewelry and The just for men and that riding Harley and everything cutting the hair. He's kind of hair, but he's got that Hey, man, I'm young at heart thing and he's a nice guy He's just he's a guy looks like he's 55 and he's trying to you know, trying to bang some 28 year olds You know what I mean? So he's got some sculpt jewelry. All right got that guy and then the rest of it is Crazy Asian chicks like doing the nails, you know, there's the nail part
Starting point is 00:13:35 With the weird fumes and the crazy Asian women who I don't think speak a lick of anything yelling across the room We have their own language. Yeah, they're just yelling in Asian gibberish. And then you have the sort of road hard put away wet seen a lot in their 50 something years. Hispanic chicks are cutting the hair. You know what I mean? Loved and lost. Had a few kids, Nalgis, maybe buried a couple of them. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:14:01 Like that kind of vibe. You know what I mean? Like that kind of vibe. And then you sit there and you listen to pop music that my daughter listens to and she's six. They pump in the Katy Perry and the Britney Spears. Justin Bieber and... Yes. And it's that grating kind of electric kind of... And it's all the stupid like, you know you want me, you know, it's all... And then you know you want me you know it's also and then I always do the same thing I look to the guy to my left who's in his 50s I look at the guy who's sitting down on the chair who's 63 I look at the Haggard Mexican chicks I look the Asian chicks and then I say to the person who's
Starting point is 00:14:39 cutting my hair and this time this is an all-timer I just said to the chick why are we listening to this music and she said oh I don't know I don't I don't even pay attention to it and I said but but this music this music it's for twelve-year-olds yeah I guess I don't know I said well don't you think people might want to hear I'm looking around I'm not seeing any 12-year-olds getting their hair cut. I've got to point out for the listeners, this was all triggered by the classical music, just so we could get a little insight into the Corolla brain. That's what triggered the styrofoam.
Starting point is 00:15:15 Okay, go ahead. So I said, well, maybe we should put some other music on. And she said, you know, I really don't care about the music. I don't pay attention to the music oh I said well let me ask you this oh boy I said these folks who work here yeah do you think any of them listen to this music when they get home no she said no she said no oh she's yes first off I don't I feel like people scroll, they look at their quarterback wristband and they try to figure out the least satisfying answer they can ever give me and
Starting point is 00:15:53 then that's what they give me. When I say to the 50 something year old woman, do you think any of these old people listen to this electronic 13 year old girl music at home, her answer can't be no, because that would be satisfying. All right. And it can't be yes, because that would be really? Let's talk, let's find the person who does and how do you know that? It'd be untrue. It'd be just flatly untrue.
Starting point is 00:16:18 Right. I have to hear, here's the answer that I get and the answer I get in life. I don't know. Maybe they do. I haven't asked. So they do. I haven't asked. So let's just break it down. It's super unsatisfying.
Starting point is 00:16:28 So I've had this conversation with you, Avogadro's number of times, like six million times. What do you think you did to contribute to her defensiveness and these unsatisfying answers? I asked questions. Do you think you made you maybe put people on the defensive? They're like, what's he up to? Why is he probing so deep into me? Is he gonna judge me? Perhaps? I didn't, not tonally. Not intentionally. And you weren't actually doing that, but maybe that's what they receive. Well no, she said nobody's ever asked about the music right no one ever no one's ever brought it up yeah
Starting point is 00:17:05 and i said right but who's in charge of the music and she said well we can all just we can play whatever we want and i said oh but do you think any of the other people here want to hear this or the customers want to hear it and she said i, I don't know. I feel your pain. And I said, well, why not then just play Christmas music? And she said, oh, we played Christmas music earlier. And then we switched it to retarded 12 year old music. And I said, why not just play Christmas music? Who's going to have a problem with that? And she said, I don't know. And then I just, I kept asking her questions and the answer was just a flat out, I don't know. I don't know. I don't hear the music that's being played. And I thought, I understand that out of it, but how far out of it are
Starting point is 00:17:58 we getting? And by the way, we're pumping this music into every sports bar, every barbershop, every mall, every place is getting the electronic 12-year-old music. Steakhouse, I mean, Mike and I were at a steakhouse in Manhattan three weeks ago, screaming at each other at our table. Because the music was so loud. It was so loud we couldn't. And it was the same shitty music. Steakhouse. It's always the same shittier than the same shitty music.
Starting point is 00:18:28 This is us enjoying dinner. Go ahead and play. Couldn't hear the specials. God I hate that. Couldn't hear the specials. God, I hate that. Couldn't hear the specials. Yeah. The waitress was apologizing. She would scream the specials at me, and because there were six people at the table, she had
Starting point is 00:18:54 to then walk around to the other side of the table and scream them at her, at the other people at the same table, at our table. Her voice wouldn't carry the four feet to the person on the backside of the booth. And she said, I know, I'm going hoarse, screaming the fucking, and I said, well, tell him to turn it down. I cannot be done. Cannot be done.
Starting point is 00:19:22 So I don't know what's going on, but she said, I don't hear the music, nobody ever asked about it. And by the way, I have never seen a human being in that place that is under the age of 40. Not someone who works there and none of their customers. It's never happened. But we must be punished with electronic shitty girl band music. Now as I always say, just play classical. Do you think
Starting point is 00:19:50 there's gonna be a fight? Like who's gonna go? What is this? Who's this fucking Bach? Oh someone's got to turn this shit off. Not cool. I don't know what's going on. I had this one today too, Drew, and then we'll go to your calls although we don't have it. Wait, wait, wait. We got something else to visit here. Oh, we got something else to do. A couple things. Okay. I forget the calls. Since when do we go to calls?
Starting point is 00:20:12 Okay. I had this one. I had this one. You and I going to the Canyon Club. Yeah, tonight. And... Tonight? Well, yeah, true, but this... We went to the Canyon Club. Right. Got it.
Starting point is 00:20:29 Never can figure out how no one can figure that one out. Yes. All right. This is being piped in directly. They'll cut that out. Through every speaker and every ceiling. No, they won't. Now listen.
Starting point is 00:20:41 I talked to Mike August and I said, how much mangrove we bring into the Canyon Club because I hope you're sitting down but people like booze. Do you know that about people? Yeah. You do? Yeah I do. You have some experience in that? I do. Okay. It can get out of control too. You might be shocked to find out. I had 400 people show up in Seattle for a little mangria tasting. They poured two kegs. Each keg holds 30 liters. They poured four ounces at a time. 30 liters, two kegs gone, and 15 cases sold. Okay. And they ran out. And everywhere everywhere we go they fucking run out. Yep. So we, the club says we'll take a case and we go, there's gonna be 500 people there and
Starting point is 00:21:34 the case is going like that. So you better buy more. And because everyone's a fucking idiot, they just go, no, we'll just buy the one case. So I say to Mike today, what's going on? And he said, well, we're selling bottles. They can buy a bottle from the club of Mangria. I said, okay, it's gonna be about 400 people there or so. I better better bring some cases. Oh, they bought four cases. I said, well, that will not be nearly enough for everybody who wants a case. Everyone is showing up, is
Starting point is 00:22:04 gonna want to leave with a bottle, and for every one person that doesn't buy a bottle, there's gonna be a person that wants three bottles. Right. So I'm doing the math. Yeah. 400 people, you've gotten 44 bottles. That ain't gonna be enough. Let's just think 200 bottles. Just round up. Right. And I said, okay, what about the bar? He said, well, they're going to be sampling, they're going to be giving little samples before the show. I said, okay, and then how much do we have for the bar? And they said, they're not pouring it at the bar. And I said, why not? And he said, well, they're scared they're going to get stuck with bottles. And I said, but we'll
Starting point is 00:22:40 buy back any bottles they don't sell. Yeah, but they don't want to get stuck with open bottles. I said, how many bottles do they have to open? Well, they don't think they're going to sell any at the bar. I said, wait a minute. You have 400 people coming in to see me. You're going to give them a sample of Mangria. And then they're going to go to the bar, and they're going to order a Mangria.
Starting point is 00:23:03 But you're not going to have Mangria. No, they don't want to the bar and they're gonna order a mangria, but you're not gonna have mangria No, they don't want to get stuck with the open bottles I said well, how many bottles do they have to open if they're not gonna sell any like according to their math out of the 400 people seven people buy a mangria cocktail so that's one bottle they open and It's ten dollars a bottle their cost. I'll buy the bottle back then or I'll bring it with me and drink it that
Starting point is 00:23:32 night on the way home. Right. I don't get what you're not going to have Mangriot. No they're not. They're going to sell the bottles. They're going to sample them but they won't have it at the bar. I said do they have some sort of exclusive agreement with Michelob or something? No, no, they're a full-service bar. They have every brand under the sun. But they don't want to pour the Mangria, which is what the people are going to be ordering when they come into the bar. No, they don't want to get stuck with the open bottles.
Starting point is 00:24:02 I said, okay, how many bottles do you have to open? I don't get it. And then I did the thing that I do now 12 to 22 times a day. What the fuck is going on with adults? What's going on with adults? We'll be right back with more of the Adam and Dr. Drew show classics. Last up for today we have, you guessed it, episode three. It's so fun to hear these OG episodes.
Starting point is 00:24:44 This episode was released on December 15th, 2012, and Adam and Drew discussed the tune out factor in today's society and how frustrating it is. Check it out. I told you at first I wanted a service goat and I need you to sign off for it. I have hypervigilance disorder. Yes, yes. It makes it difficult for me to fly and be around stupid people. So I now... Need a goat on a plane. Now Now you switched it. Oh. I
Starting point is 00:25:07 need I want to service Pelican. I thought that I was really hoping for you to go all the way to Crow. No I want to start with Gilligan. Okay. Gilligan the Pelican? Well I just call him Gilligan. People find out he's a Pelican. If you say Gilligan the Pelican they go, no. You know, if you go, can I bring Gilligan the Pelican with me to your party? They go, no. But if you go, can I bring Gilligan? They'll go, yeah, whatever, bring a French. And then, so I leave the Pelican part off. And I found it opens doors, number one. Number two, he knows he's a pelican or doesn't, either way. Calling him Gilligan the Pelican is not going to work.
Starting point is 00:25:47 He responds to Gilligan. You know what I mean? Yeah. And by the way, what's your dog's name? My dog? Yeah. Rex? Do you call him Rex the dog?
Starting point is 00:25:57 Or just call him Rex? Call him Rex. Okay. Point made. Truth be known, I was just too funny to bring up Rex. Well, what happened to Rex? I want a note for my service pelican anyway. Okay, got done and done. And he's going to be on my shoulder. Well, you're a doctor. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:17 And the service dog thing is... Listen, we need to design a little vest for him. I mean, we gotta figure that shit out, but we'll get a little vest for the service pelican. I can pick up a pelican vest. I probably have a few laying around. Chris, Max Patta, do we have any pelican vests laying around? I think I saw some in the back. Yeah, I got some.
Starting point is 00:26:36 Yeah, we got some for you. Yeah, I got suede, I got, I have a Berber. That's a- But it's gotta be sort of state sanctioned, service animal. Yeah, I got a cordber. But it's gotta be sort of state sanctioned service animal. Yeah, I got a corduroy, that's sweet. It's a burgundy corduroy. Special occasion? Yeah, stepping out.
Starting point is 00:26:54 Yeah, I think there's a box back there. I don't know if it's marked Pelican vest, but I'm sure there's some laying around. Yeah, I saw like a maroon one back there. Yeah, I have one in my car too. All right, anyway, Rex. Yeah, Rex, so we got a maroon one back there. Yeah, I have one in my car too. All right. Anyway, yeah, Rex So we got a puppy right and this dog is active and The puppy yeah, they don't get a puppy Rex is the puppy and and so
Starting point is 00:27:15 You said we call him Rex the dog. I call him Rex the honey badger. Oh, really? He's Rex doesn't give a shit He is like doesn't you've seen that honey badger video? Yeah, this dog is just like that. He is like, doesn't, have you seen that honey badger video? Yeah, this dog is just like that. He just just barrels into everything. They're vicious. Honey badger vicious. This is the vicious dog. He just doesn't give a shit. He just just just goes ahead. Whatever. Yeah. Let's just noggin do the talking. Absolutely. And so is he chewing on stuff? Okay, let me say this. I have raised a German Shepherd puppy before it died at about six months of age. What?
Starting point is 00:27:55 Oh, that's right. Yeah, yeah, I forgot about that. Yeah. Yeah. That was my mistake for daring to love. I literally, if anyone wants to know anything about my life, I spent my entire youth begging my parents to get a dog. Could I please have a puppy? And my mom's thing was like, hold on,
Starting point is 00:28:20 I'm in my bedroom yelling freak out, staring at a bio rhythms wheel. I can't, I can't. I'm fine. My mom wasn't, my mom, she didn't say it, but she's like, you, we're not going to take care of you guys. Imagine a puppy. I want you to imagine that. Imagine a puppy in that house.
Starting point is 00:28:33 Yeah, so, no, impossible. So, let me get this straight. Your mom, your mom didn't take such good care? She wasn't neglectful? Not, she wasn't one of them helicopter moms. Got it. Okay, check. I wasn't sure about that
Starting point is 00:28:48 Well, you never mentioned it. She was kind of like a helicopter mom If you're picturing the helicopter they were flying away now pushing off the deck of the plane Saigon and Saigon When they're literally pushing them off the decks of the aircraft carriers trying to get the hell out of there. Yeah So she's that kind of helicopter mom. But no, she didn't. And then my dad, who doesn't want to do anything for anyone or any creature on God's planet equally, said, yeah, we'll get you a dog as soon as I get out of this apartment. And then we got a house, but the dog never showed up.
Starting point is 00:29:21 And at a certain point, I just, I was broken. You can break people in a few years. And I just stopped asking for money, dogs, food, you know, whatever. And so I moved on and then at a certain point, I found myself living in a house, making a lot of money and saying, wait a minute, I'm 33 years old. I've never had a pet dog.
Starting point is 00:29:43 I've always wanted a pet dog. Why shouldn't I have a pet dog? I've always wanted a German Shepherd puppy and now I'm gonna get one because why can't I have it? Why can't I enjoy things and have things? Where's my puppy? I'll do it for myself. I'll heal my inner child and I'll get it. I'll name it after my beloved just deceased grandfather, Latsy and then the dog died. But in the interim was the worst two months of my life. I got the dog at like three months, four months, it made it, it lived for like three months, chewed on everything,
Starting point is 00:30:16 cried every night, shit everywhere, and I swear to God I have twins, not nearly as much difficulty as the puppy. The puppy's taken out of you, right? Well, here's the, now, here's the caveat. I did not hire a heavyset woman from Guatemala to come take care of my puppy as I did with the kids. You had to hand off the puppy the way you hand it off the kids. Yes, puppy, as I did with the kids. You had to hand off the puppy the way you handed off the kids. Yes, that's what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:30:49 I had to take care of the puppy, but I am telling you now that a puppy is every bit as much trouble as a kid in the raising, if not more. I swear to God. It's the same stress kind of thing, because you know, sleep and getting up and always thinking about it and after.
Starting point is 00:31:06 Yeah, and it's this thing too where it's like, they go, you got to put the puppy in the crate, put some familiar in the crate, and you're laying in bed and you hear the thing crying. And it's like, all right, come on, it's gonna stop. And it's like 20 minutes, and then it's like 40 minutes, and it's like, it's hour and a half. It's not stopped crying, and then eventually you get up
Starting point is 00:31:27 and now you've fucked up the whole cycle. So I tell people, do not get a puppy. I got my dog Molly when she was a year old. She was completely house trained. She had no fucking bad habits, didn't chew on anything. She's a great dog too. A great dog. It's like every night just open the door,
Starting point is 00:31:45 goes out, does her business, comes back in, goes to bed the following day. She's waiting by the door again. Doesn't chew, doesn't do any, literally chews on her. Recognizes the difference between her stuffed animals and the kids stuffed animals. Wow.
Starting point is 00:32:02 When it comes to chewing shit. I don't know why you would know the difference, but no. So get a one-year-old and not a three-month-old. So we're working our way through it. Yeah. It's always like four or five months old now, and we're getting there. We're getting there. It's going to be a good dog.
Starting point is 00:32:16 You can see the glimmers of what's ahead. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Oh my God. Fucking full-time job. In the meantime, he's biting your face, he's biting your clothes, he's ruining the furniture. That's good times. Yeah, and the thing about the furniture or the shoe or the baseball mitt, all they got
Starting point is 00:32:30 to do is ruin 10% of it and you got to chuck the whole thing. Oh, and it takes what, four seconds for them to do that? Yeah. You take one fucking Italian loafer, four seconds later, two Italian loafers are going in the garbage can. And your dog's shitting tassels That sounds like that's a like a euphemism for a guy being super scared us due to shitting tassels Fuck as soon as I fucking walked up on it
Starting point is 00:32:58 We need to sort of get that get that going shitting tassels. Yeah, it's good. I like it Yeah, it'll be shitting tassels when I'm done with it All right, you got some calls you like there Dr. Drew? Let's see here there was one I like there where the heck happened to him. Mm-hmm well if you want to support the show by the way you can click through the Amazon link at Adam and Drew and it's on the Adam Kroll page that's adamkroll.com we appreciate your support. We thank you in advance yes Matt I'm interested in that guy 20-5 all right let's talk to Matt Matt hello what's going on Matt 22 from Lincoln Nebraska I just want to say thanks the free thousands of free hours of entertainment love you love both guys
Starting point is 00:33:43 yeah see how the Lord won't let a compliment come through. No, no, not for you. Your phone went a little... Are you Skyping or something, Matt? Yeah, I'm always kind of a... Are you Skype, Matt? Are you Skyping? Shit.
Starting point is 00:34:02 Oh, jeez. Well, listen. Here's how fucked up Skype is. People can't even respond in the affirmative or the negative because Skype is so bad that they literally can't answer, are you Skyping? Maybe that's the answer. But it's hard with cell phones now. Well, let me get to what he was saying because I think it's something.
Starting point is 00:34:23 Drew, do you understand how you work? There's five calls up there. Yeah, I did I know that guy was gonna have trouble with connection. I would argue it's more powerful than no Well, that's all for this week. Thanks for listening to the Adam and dr Drew show classics I've been your host big brother Jake host of the Big Brother Jake Podcast here on the Podcast One Network. Remember to check back each week for new episodes and while you're at it, don't forget to like, subscribe and rate us 5 stars wherever you get your podcasts. Deuces!

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