THE ADAM BUXTON PODCAST - EP.203 - TASH DEMETRIOU

Episode Date: September 16, 2023

Adam talks with with English-Cypriot actor and comedian Tash Demetriou about mushroom zombies, bloopers and why they'll never take ayahuasca, and Tash speaks about how her Dad is doing.Adam also unveils a short(s) collaboration with electronic music legend Squarepusher in the outro.DEMENTIA UKAnyone affected by dementia can contact Dementia UK’s free Helpline on 0800 888 6678 or by emailing [e-mail]. The helpline is staffed by their dementia specialist Admiral Nurses who can offer practical and emotional support with any aspect of dementia. The charity also offers free video or phone appointments at a time that suits you on their website – dementiauk.orgThis conversation was recorded face to face in London on March 29th, 2023Thanks to Séamus Murphy-Mitchell for production support and conversation editing.Podcast artwork by Helen GreenRELATED LINKSHOT BOX (CHELMSFORD MUSIC VENUE) RECOVERY FUND CONTRIBUTE TO ADAM AND JOE CHRISTMAS PODCAST 2023ADAM IN CONVERSATION WITH DOON MACKICHAN @ MANNINGTON HALL, NORWICH, 7th October, 2023, 4pmBRIAN ENO & BALTIC SEA PHILHARMONIC @ ROYAL FESTIVAL HALL, 30th October 2023, 6.30 and 9.30pm Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey, how you doing listeners? Adam Buxton here. A slightly unusual start to the podcast this week. You might be able to hear that I am not in my usual farm track, but in a park just outside Norwich with Rosie. It's a special treat. Hello. Are you okay? Oh, yeah, fine. Just out walking the dog and, unbelievably, lost the ruddy thing. Oh, dear. You've seen her, have you? What kind of dog is it? A beige one. Yeah, a, just out walking the dog, and unbelievably, they've lost the ruddy thing. Oh, dear. You've seen her, have you? What kind of dog is it?

A beige one, yeah, a beige bitch. Bev, no second name. Don't think I have seen a dog like that. It's Adam, isn't it? Yes, that's right. Hello, I thought I recognised you. You're Alan Partridge, right? Yes.

I used to watch your chat show a long time ago. Thank you. Are you still doing stuff these days? It always makes me laugh, Adam, when people say, you're still doing stuff. Yeah, I mean, I'm doing lots of stuff, lots of stuff that people notice. A high pickup with lots of traction, which I know makes me sound like a monster truck.

Congrats on your career, too. Thank you. Yeah. Do you know what? It goes to show, doesn't it? You just never underestimate anyone. You know, I say to people, you. Thank you. Yeah. Do you know what? It goes to show, doesn't it? You just never underestimate anyone. You know, I say to people, you know, look at Adam, second name. Buxton.

Buxton. Yeah. And apparently you make a living from this podcast. Yep. Sponsors. Thank you, God. Do you get good people on? Paul McCartney.

Heard of him. Really? Yeah. He was on. Paul McCartney. Wow. Yeah, he was on. Paul McCartney, wow. We had Kazuo Ishiguro and Romesh Ranganathan, Gary Young, the writer, Ian McEwan as well. Paul McCartney, wow.

Yeah. So he's obviously up for doing podcasts. I suppose. It took us a while to pin him down, but anyway, I should... I knew you lived in Norfolk, because the chap that does my garden used to do yours but he says you wouldn't let him inside to use the toilet

he used to, we in the hedge, FYI and now you emailed, didn't you? I think my producer said wanting to advertise your podcast or something I wouldn't worry about that it's just not normally the kind of thing we do it's probably why we didn't do that

it's a series 3 from the Oast House, the Alan Partridge podcast. It's 11 episodes, all available now on Audible. But, yeah, no, forget that. Although, if you ever want to come on my podcast and plug yours, we're not meant to advertise, but there are always ways round it. Yeah, like coming out to a park and pretending you've lost your dog. You wouldn't do that. Do you even own a dog?

I've owned lots of dogs, mate. Yeah, but do you have one now? Well, define own. Possess or have. Define dog. I mean, where is this even going? Well, it's just funny that you emailed and then you're here in the park while I'm recording talking about an invisible dog.

Ah, there she is. Hello, girl. Thought I'd lost you. What colour would you say that is, Adam? Yeah, beige. Beige, precisely, yeah. Quick look at the groin. She's a... Bitch. Beige bitch, exactly as described. Sorry, I didn't mean to...

No, it's absolutely fine, Adam. Couldn't tell less, Adam. Anyway, well, nice to meet you, Alan I'm not a liar, Adam Yeah We must sort numbers sometime And get Macca's details Bye, Alan I added one more podcast to the giant podcast bin Now you have plucked that podcast out and started listening

I took my microphone and found some human folk. Then I recorded all the noises while we spoke. My name is Adam Buxton. I'm a man. I want you to enjoy this, that's the plan That was a kind of hybrid advertorial sitcom that we created for you there. No, that's all right. You're welcome. As I was saying to Alan, I don't often do adverts in the main body of the podcast. But I thought, come on, it's Partridge. And it's a very funny podcast. So win-win. But how are you doing, podcats? It's been ages.

I've missed you. I hope you've had a decent summer. Rosie, come on. She's loping. She's been... a lope past from the hairy bullet. That's all we get these days, if we're lucky. It takes a great deal to convince

Rosie to join me for a walk nowadays. If it weren't for her comfy padded harness, I don't think I would be able to get her out of the house at all. What the harness enables me to do is to attach the lead and encourage her forward in a way that is fairly insistent but doesn't get all strangly it's comfortable for her and then once we get up the track I can take the lead off on a night like tonight where there's no one around and then she's a bit more lopey. But look, I'm going to catch up with you a bit more at the end of the podcast.

Right now, allow me to tell you a bit about today's conversational ramble with one of the podcast's most valued friends, Natasha Charlotte Dimitriou. Tash facts. Tash was born in 1987 and grew up in North London, the daughter of an English mother and a Greek Cypriot father. Her younger brother is the actor and comedian Jamie Dimitriou.

You know Tash from TV shows like Stathlet's Flats, where she plays Stath's sister Sophie. And Ellie White, Tash's comedy partner, plays her friend Katya. Tash and Ellie also have their own sketch show called Ellie and Natasha. A second series was recently commissioned and due to appear on BBC Two sometime in the future. We don't know when. The first series was on in 2021. Enjoyed it very much indeed. You may have also seen Tash in What We Do in the Shadows. Since 2019, she has played Nadia, a Greek Romany vampire,

in the FX horror comedy created by Jemaine Clement and Taika Waititi. So today's conversation with Tash was recorded face to face earlier this year, March 2023. And we did this one in London. We met up because I had asked Tash if she would do a voice for another thing I was working on. And when we had done it it I left the recorder running with Tash's knowledge not covertly you understand and we chatted a little bit more and we had been talking before we were recording about how many apocalyptic tv shows there are nowadays and that got us on to talking about a couple of shows that I watched this year with my family.

Station Eleven, about the survivors of a devastating flu, attempting to rebuild and reimagine the world. Sound familiar? And also the TV adaptation of The Last of Us, And, uh, also the TV adaptation of The Last of Us, the 2013 video game in which Joel, a smuggler, is tasked with escortingibalistic creatures that become more fungus-y the longer they survive. That's a fair description of me, actually, as well. I don't think there are spoilers for those shows in this conversation. There are spoilers for the 2011 film Contagion, just so you're aware. Anyway,

the result was quite a lot of stupid mushroom chat, but towards the end of the conversation, things got more emotional when I asked how Tash's dad was doing. If you've heard Tash on this podcast before, then you will have enjoyed her hilarious stories about her pa. But the last time she was on, which was July 2022, I think, she talked about how her dad and his family have been dealing in the last few years with the onset of his dementia, specifically Alzheimer's disease. And this is something, of course, that is affecting more and more of us one way or another. If you're one of those people

and feel that you could use some help or advice, there are details of Dementia UK's free helpline and their email address in the description of today's podcast. It's always great to see Tash and it always involves a lot of laughter, but this conversation was more than usually emotional I guess but I hope you'll come with us

and rejoin me afterwards for a bit more waffle and maybe I will play you and this is not a joke the square pusher collab that I did earlier this year actual square pusher collaboration. Sort of. Anyway, stay tuned for that.

But right now, with Tash Dim. Come on, let's chew the vat and have a ramble chat. Put on your conversation coat and find your talking hat. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. do you watch station 11 i don't what is that it's partly under the world it was made in it's a book that came out in 2014 around then and it's about a flu pandemic that wipes out most of the world's population are you talking about the last of us no that's a mushroom pandemic it's the worst disgusting it's disgusting i didn't know it was my greatest fear but it is my greatest fear now. Being taken over by mushrooms.

Just loads of disgusting mushrooms. Just being like, I want to kiss you with my mushroom. It's the worst thing I've ever seen. I couldn't believe it. I never knew that's what I was scared of, but I'm petrified of fungus. It's horrible.

You've seen it. It's absolutely the worst thing i've ever seen yeah i can believe it it's just a load of mushrooms that want you to be mushrooms like at least with the flu you don't it's not like the cold wants you to become the flu it just wants you to get ill and die but the mushroom wants you to be a mushroom. I feel the same way as you do about them. I think that's why the show has done so well. I think people really have a visceral response to mushrooms and the idea that your body would be taken over by them.

Because, you know, obviously you can grow fungus on a human body, right? Yes, you can. You can get fungal infections. I know know i've got one on my toe and it won't go and that's why maybe i have this thing that i have tried i like beyond dipping my toe in battery acid which i found on some reddit post that said that's what gets rid of it i have tried everything and every morning it's like i'm back and then you go and get your toes done and they're like oh no very bad it's very bad you're wearing the wrong shoes or something no it's because i did hot yoga for a while and i think hot yoga is just essentially it's like a money laundering front but it's actually they're just fungus farmers and they're just harvesting fungus from people doing hot yoga and then i caught you know it was the lab leak theory i caught the fungus from from yoga and it won't go and it's

been a few years but yeah i live in i live also garlic when people like breaded garlic butter mushrooms pop one in my mouth you're like it's fungus i agree with you so you don't like mushrooms no no no no do i and people look at me like well the thing is i am a picky eater i don't like cheese i don't like any but that's that's but that's also mold so i kind of get it i do understand yeah what's the word i'm looking for it's all about spores and mold and well it's just like the feces of life the feces of nature you don't fancy scraping it up and being like lovely blob of cheese and mushroom and toast that's the thing it's all weird jammy no it's like stink and then mushroom is just spongy nothing sorry when you're getting a pig to sniff it out

and then be like, lovely, truffle, lovely, truffle pig, snuff it out for me, lovely. You're like, you've gone insane. That's true, isn't it? That's the only animal that is able to locate this beautiful, exquisite delicacy. Is a pig. able to locate this beautiful exquisite delicacy

is a pig and then they keep it in like a box with hay like a weird like dead hamster and then they present it to you would you like some no a pig found it the only one that's

more of a delicacy is found only beneath the shit of a dog. Have you ever tried a truffle? I mean, I'm guessing the answer is no. No, I've had it on stuff and I've tried a truffle, Chris. But every time I'm like, oh my God, something's dropped on this. This fell on the floor and they've scraped it up and put it back in the plate. It's like, it's a headache in a taste. It's like a migraine.

So if you have a really good connection with your nose and you're like somebody who's like, my palate, then maybe you'll like it. But I don't identify with my palate. I identify with my teeth. So did you watch The Last of Us? Yeah. I haven't watched the last episode though,

so please don't tell me. Oh my God. I know. I know. Have you heard anything about the last of us yeah i haven't watched the last episode though so please don't tell me oh my god i know i know have you heard anything about the last episode i've heard it's really good because i it was a real roller coaster it was like first two episodes wow wow wow wow wow he's kissing her with a mushroom coming out his mouth jesus wept and then i feel like there were people who were like there was one that was a bit boring and then there was a really sad one with Ron Swanson which was really beautiful and kind of like it's the two guys yeah yeah that was with Murray from White Lotus and it was like its own kind of little mini film yeah it was beautiful it was really beautiful and also made me want to be a prepper so hard oh oh to be that organized do you know what i mean though i know it was so great wasn't it he's absolutely on top of it but they gloss over the fact that

generally the political profile of someone who's that organized is not really so cozy but that's why i liked it because we're like you know it're like, you know, it takes all sorts, doesn't it? It takes all sorts. And, um, turns out being that being a little bit, you know, he was obviously in this show, in this world,

in that version of the last of us, the conspiracy theorist would have been right. Yeah. Because, you know, if anyone was, I mean, I don't even know if anyone was saying that in that world,

but whoever was going, I'm telling you these mushrooms are going to take over. And the people were like, oh, shut up. It's like, well, you've improved, right? Because now you're a mushroom. Yeah. That was very reductive characterization of a conspiracy theorist that you just indulged in.

Okay. Let me try and do it. Like, dude, I'm pretty sure like, it's getting pretty hot around here. Silicon Valley. The mushrooms are getting bigger. That's more realistic. I think like a Silicon Valley prepper, probably they're microdosing.

They're getting paranoid visions while they're on mushrooms anyway, because that's the other part of the mushroom world, of course, is your psychedelics. I know. Have you ever done that? No. I'm too imaginative without the staff adam where are the places i'll go it scares me so much and also i have some ex-friends and boyfriends who did do psychedelics and said to me with like the straightest face yeah john lennon came back and told me that i was the missing link

from the beatles okay and i'm like we just had sex your brain is bad your brain is bad have i known you thought that and they were absolutely swearing it to you yeah just people who like you know they say it with that sort of you know that almost like you know evangelical like you know in a mad someone who's convinced of something they weren't saying you know i mean obviously i was high but no they're like it's like i think the community that love those sorts of things you know they talk about ayahuasca like she took me as in like you know they give a they give a kind of she's got a personality a personality and like agency to the experience and so i feel like it isn't it isn't like you know i was fucking gagged off my nut and I, uh, I did loads of shots.

Who's that guy? All of my friends. Um, no, you know, like it's not that where it's just like, oh, I, you know, we, we got really high and watched Blades of Glory. Yeah. And it was so funny and I was laughing so much because I smoked smoked loads of weed it's more like they're expanding their consciousness and i'm saying that in in a non-ironical way i have great respect for people who do i mean i would love to do that but i'm the same as you i'm too frightened you got too much of an incredible mind i do think i am like if it helps people and i've like heard

little bits of information that it can help definitely i think with depression and trauma and ptsd i'm like oh well that's fantastic what about under carefully controlled circumstances if you've got super doctors there you know because people like you and i we've got hang-ups right oh for sure what if we were able to get in touch with some of the things that we're hung up about to get a different perspective on those things love ourselves a little bit more i'm really i'm i'm of the value i'm of the i've always been the sort of i don't need to love i i think love love i think i i'm always like you you're you're you're a piece of shit you're a piece of shit. You're a piece of shit.

You don't know anything. Always assume you're wrong. Because that is what life has shown me. Like, if there's a chair that's slightly broken, I will sit on it. And I will take it down and ruin the party. Like, if there's a floor to be hit, I will smash my nose into it. Like, if it's so, it's like, that smash my nose into it like if it's so it's like as much as my lived experience is assume the worst and then you can only ever be pleased right so no psychedelic experiences at all for no t dimitri no absolutely no i just i

just i'm so scared i'm so scared like i just know also I would become so annoying and be such a burden on everyone. Yeah. But to return to, I think, where we started, The Last of Us, you know, there's going to be a second series. Have you played the video game? Obviously not. No, I haven't. But I do know it was a video game.

And I know that I actually really, I thought it was quite juicy. I don't, I think they kind of dropped it maybe for the rest of the series. But that first episode, the way it was filmed kind of felt like a video game a bit. Like the way it was kind of, you're seeing it from the POV of the- In the corridors and stuff. And like in the car when he's like driving

and you can kind of see, I don't know. I thought that was kind of a- I think that's just filming things. Well, in my head, I was like, wow, the director's really talking to no one in my house wow the director's really taken on board the video game um origins of this person shooter camera and i'm really i'm feeling like i'm playing the game and i don't have a console in my hand i've got a remote wow my daughter is 14 and even though she's not a massive gamer like

she plays some video games but she's not on there all the time because she's too busy going scrolly scrolly heart heart scrolly scrolly scrolly heart scrolly heart can you not stop her yeah she's not that bad oh good oh good she's not that bad she's fine but um she knows what's going to happen in the last of us because she has watched friends playing it and she said to me the other day because we were talking about the final episode obviously we're not going to do spoilers here but there's a lot to think about and talk about after you've seen the finale of the first season of or series of the last of us okay and we were having that conversation and um and i was like well what the hell's gonna happen in the second series then and she's like

well do you want to know and i said you shouldn't even that's not even cool to ask me if i want to know no and i said you should be cancelled i'm cancelling you yeah you're asking me that question within their family yeah so i'm cancelling my daughter because she i said it's not cool to even ask that question especially to a dickhead because i'm gonna say that's okay yeah and that's what i said so then she told me the whole of the second how does she know that the film isn't gonna like the directors or writers aren't gonna take a little bit of their own she doesn't but so far they've stuck very closely to it because so i mean i this is such a boring question i thought with video games you decide how it ends by how much of a good player you are or not my understanding is that that's what's very clever

about the game is that you you get put into a kind of zero sum unwinnable scenario and that's what is reflected in the tv show oh okay i just okay so this is still attached to the bit it's a bit of a tangent so this there was some bloopers of the last of us on youtube that i'm basically doing what you do in bug but i just, I literally remember someone sent me this the other day. So there's some, you, some outtakes of the last of us on YouTube and a comment underneath it, which is one of the best comments I've ever seen is this.

Pedro is a bad actor. Bloopers should never happen as an actor. It's your job to always have the best performance. When working on my own short film, if one of my actors would play up, I would deduct some of their pay. Shoots are expensive. and i don't want you to waste that money by laughing around the fact that he was paid 100k is more disgusting actors it's your job to act and be tip-top mint condition personally if i was craig mazzin or any showrunner producer i would immediately talk with

pedro and bella about the inappropriate misconduct mistakes do happen but after the first take there's no second chances there should be some immediate consequences for the actors laugh and critique me all you want but i'm here to film not watch you gig on take it unprofessional honestly ashamed that this woke modern age thinks this is acceptable holy moses do we know if they've produced any actual films well clearly he did a short film and it was a toxic environment that's like the james brown of movie directing of just fining the actors if they get a line wrong mistake do happen but after the first take dot dot dot there's no second chances there's blooper reels are weird i can't help

clicking on them but they make me feel dirty i don't know what it is like the first time i ever saw one in the olden times tash let me tell you when you would watch it'll be all right on the night and i've spoken about this before on the podcast i think it was a thrill that was beyond electric it was like stepping into another world flipping around the the tv and seeing behind it what the reality of this amazing world was like the fact that these gods and goddesses would get things wrong was just so extraordinary and hilarious and fun but then i think the first time i saw a sitcom that had its own blooper reel at the end I thought no we don't really need blooper reels anymore I don't know I mixed because it was the same for me

you know when you'd watch something that you absolutely loved or there were those films that would sometimes in the in the credits at the end you'd see some blooper-y stuff and you were like I'm one of them I'm one of you i'm friends with you now because i've seen this so it was electric in that way yeah but i think i know what you mean about the feeling sick thing because maybe once you've become part of the industry you realize there are some people that fake it oh really well i thought that's what you were referring to. No, no, that didn't even cross my mind. I was just thinking, my problem is like, A, I do think it's slightly, even though I love them, sort of.

A, I think it slightly erodes the thing. Also, I think it's become a little smug. Yeah, obviously. It's because of blooper reels have become a real thing that I definitely know there are people who I've acted with who are like come on just thinking like blooper reel blooper like this is all like people who go like that'd be great for the blooper no seriously can we get uh can we sort of put star that in the edit or something because that'd be fantastic for the blooper reel and you're like lord above

give me strength so I totally it's definitely become a smug but in the thing of people do it on purpose like I guess it really broke my heart when I would like I don't know when I'd go to the theatre or not that I go to the theatre much you go more than I do well I went and I think I went to see a play that I really liked or with a friend or something twice and in the first night i'd been like oh really he said the thing went wrong brilliant and then the next night the exact thing went wrong at the exact same time and i was like play what goes wrong uh no it was the play was they've just gone wrong oh the title no but you know you're like oh oh no i've been lied to oh they did the same blooper yeah they like they they're like you know we all, they're like, you know,

we all doing live comedy, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There are certain sets that where you go, oh, he tripped up on his line. And then you go and see it again. You're like, oh, everything's a lie. Well, the thing is that I think the way it might happen is that you do a genuine blooper,

you fluff something, you get a big laugh from the audience, and then you think, oh, well, there is something in there that is repeatable and that is better than what I had before. And usually what happens is if you try and recreate a spontaneous moment, it never works and you abandon it. But sometimes you can be led through to a nice little thing that does work. Or the other thing that happens is you always trip up on the same thing so the same blooper can happen just because there's something built into oh for sure the way you've written it something that makes you laugh over and over again makes

you laugh or i had a bit when i was touring around reading from my book there was one bit that always triggered me and made me weep but that's that is the beauty of the blooper like that is when it's really funny and people like so i remember watching the office extras on the dvd the bloopers like over and over and because you're called you're like this is legit like literally he is coming out with some of the funniest off-the-cuff things what would you do other than laugh like it would be such a struggle but yeah it's it's like if anything gets really big it somehow gets corrupted and that's what's happened to the blooper bloopers yes also the other thing in my limited experience of acting is that when you are genuinely fucking up a line it's mortifyingly embarrassing well that's like people this is really awful because

i've i've said it so many times in interviews. But people will often, you know, because I've done some comedy TV, people are like, it must be such a laugh on set. And I'm always like, it really is. Yeah. But the truth is, it's not. It's deadly serious. You're hungry. It's cold.

Everyone wants to go home. Everyone wants to go home. It's late at night. Or, you know, it's like we've wants to go home. Everyone wants to go home. It's late at night or, you know, it's like we've got 15 minutes to get this entire scene. And so quite often it's so deadly serious. It's like the antithesis of Giggly Town. And that's not to say that it doesn't happen, but it's not.

I think it's because there are some actors that I work with who do a lot more joyful than I am and are like laughing all over the place. But I am quite worried about fucking it up or like stepping on someone else's line or not getting it right or something. So like they did some bloopers for Starthelets Flats and I was mortified because you go through all of them and it's like, oh, look at the most boring person in the cast. Like everyone's laughing, everyone's making mistakes and like having a great time. And I'm there with like a dead face like, oh, look at the most boring person in the cast. Like everyone's laughing. Everyone's making mistakes and like having a great time. And I'm there with like a dead face. Like, are we going again?

Sorry, can we just do that again? It's so embarrassing because everyone's so, and like, because we're all like friends, that show is like, it should, but it's like, why are you so miserable? You've got a denim cap on and square tracksuit bottoms. Laugh, you miserable idiot. But then there are times though,

when you do get the giggles and it's like, it's like being on heroin, but then you can't stop. And then you get to the place where the camera people are going like, okay. No, there's definitely that. And also I do think, you know, the smugness comes to the fact that

if it's the actors that are all having a laugh you're like you're all getting paid so much money do your job yes so it's like is it like everyone there's someone holding a really heavy camera and someone else hasn't slept do your job yeah and you're like that i said the wrong word oh man okay so we tied up all the loose ends in this section um mushrooms you don't like them and you don't want to become one god no please no i'd hate that also you don't want to do psychedelics um if you ever do if you ever change your mind maybe you and i could go and do we should do one and that's a tv show isn't it i mean that is a podcast at the very least that is a tv show come on someone out there just silence and dribbling if you want to pay me and tash to go out to peru or whatever and do ayahuasca under very strictly managed medical conditions.

On BBC2. So that we don't lose our minds forever. I got asked to do the, I don't get asked to do, sadly I thought at this point in my career I'd be like, you know, I'd be like batting away the offers. But on the whole, I've been asked to do two shows repeatedly. One I can't do because I don't have a driving licence, which is Celebrity Most Dangerous Roads. I didn't even know. Which is just have a driving license which is celebrity most dangerous roads

which is just a couple of celebrities go to some really dangerous roads and drive down them and shit themselves which i'd love to do obviously if i had a license but sadly i don't and the other one is celebrity hunted oh yeah yeah yeah but you i just was like looking at it and there was a guy that did it and did it so well that and i feel like i might be making this up i don't think i am he was so good he like he was gone for about two months so explain the premise for people who haven't seen it celebrity i think well hunted is a show where they get like sort of fbi cia mf mfi i don't know where mf doom yeah exactly um experts and some people who are up for trying to hide and like go off the radar and like so i guess like there's a kind of control center where

they're tracking the people well they have they have all the technology that they would use to to try and catch a fugitive yeah a real fugitive so if so you're basically taking on the the character of um a very dangerous criminal. Yeah. And the challenge is who lasts the longest without being caught. But 100%. I think it was like me and Ellie to do it. This is what would happen.

We'd freak out, go to Angels, buy clown wigs, pay with our card. Then I go to say, can I get some mango fingers from Marks and Spencer's? Done. Seven minutes. We're on the floor with our hands behind our backs in clown wigs. I just want a healthy snack quickly. I got asked to do hunted as well. But I, the problem with the show is that obviously you don't know how long it's going to take if you turn out to be really good. Well, that's what I'm saying. You have to kind of be free for up to sort of a year if you are really good. They, that's what I'm saying. You have to kind of be free for up to sort of a year. If you are really good.

I swear there was a guy that like went deep, went low in Scotland. And he used like canals. Maybe when I'm retired and my entire family have abandoned me, I would be like, no, why not? Go and see how well I can hide. Become a mushroom. The other thing about about presumably some of your friends have done the ayahuasca retreats yes i don't know i don't there was a costume and a lovely costume lady who i worked with who was a shaman oh yeah and was constantly like

i'll introduce you to her and always be like oh sorry who and it was like oh ayahuasca sorry yes yes ayahuasca oh she called ayahuasca her. And she was... What, just like on a break or something? Well, like, yeah, like, when we finish filming, let's have an afternoon where... I don't know if you can microdose ayahuasca. I think it's all or nothing, isn't it? Oh, no, no, it's not microdosing. It's do you want to...

Fool she. Do you want to do her? Yeah. Do you want to fuck ayahuasca? And apparently that's what you do. You have to make love to it. Yes. Well, I've got a couple of friends who've tried it simon amstel was on this podcast a few years ago in fact extolling

the virtues of everyone pukes though i think that's part of it that's the thing is like nothing about it seems fun puking you know feeling sick to your stomach confronting your worst fears maybe it's because we're just small-minded little puritan bigots well i i worry that that is part of it just a little like no i'm just like some double espresso it's fine for me yes i don't like cheese i don't like mushrooms and i don't like psychedelic experiences that broaden my consciousness shut up go and take some ayahuasca and fucking live a little yeah well you know if we get an offer come on that could be that could be good you know i think we'd end up doing the sort of like sort of quite safe like um a little nibble no like um you know like a sort of it would be like

itv yeah me and you sponsored by sponsored by McDonald's Sue Perkins is our shaman yeah and on the way we sort of do some cultural stuff in Peru

we do the Inca Trail do you like apocalypse TV shows movies fiction I'd be interested

to see what you make of Station Eleven I like it well I like it if it's like if it's if it's fantastic if it's not too realistic yes exactly I don't like it when it's like really like I found interstellar really really troubling because it started out with like the world had just like nothing crazy had happened just the air got a little bit more toxic. And it's like, oh, well, in my worst nightmare.

They're having dust storms and all that. That would just be a hellscape to live through. So if we're talking about like mad rats take over, I'm like, come on, give it to me. Yes, yes. Zombies. Cut to us in two years being like. Mushroom people for that matter. Exactly.

Yeah, that kind of thing. Well, maybe you won't like station 11 then because it's quite uh yes it was uh i think i said already didn't i it was the book came out in 2014 and it was all about a flu pandemic that wipes out most of the population well that was like that film there was it called contagion am i making that up that everyone that went to like the top of netflix because it was weirdly about a flu panic that came from Asia. That's right.

That's right. And that was the one, and spoilers, that everyone dies in that one. And there's a lot of stunt casting in that one. I think, what's her name? Kate Winslet is in that one as a lovable doctor brave doctor and halfway through see ya and it's quite a shock you think no not lovely kate yeah no they really they're they're

they're it wasn't touch wood it wasn't like i was watching it thinking oh my god this is what we're gonna be living through but it was very much with that one it was like you'd sneeze you're dead yeah it wasn't now that's that's like station 11 yeah right it's like 99 fatal to me it's the um in the last of us it's when that i think it's she's like an asian doctor and she gets like sequestered and she's like what's going on why am i here and they bring her in to see that body in the room and it's full of it's it's a fungus body but just her like face of like yes nothing all you can do is drop a nuclear bomb on the town and you're like oh dear i don't i don't like it i mean my thing is that i'm i feel like if you are getting a whole generation into the these kind of apocalyptic narratives that's got to do something to your general will to live i'm telling you we're there will be people lapping as fungus and trying to put their fungus on me.

Well, that's, that sounds fun though. Okay. The next few years, the last of us is going to spawn a load of people who are like cosplaying as fungus. And that is when I walk into the sea. Cosplaying as fungus.

Yeah. Comic-Con this year. Cause that show has been so huge yeah comic-con this year because that show's been so huge comic-con this year it's just gonna be just a giant from from a sort of bird's eye view of it it's just gonna be a big big plate of mushroom risotto queuing up for autographs will you go to comic-con i don't know actually we went we did go for one year for Shadows and then the old pandemic happened. And so we did it all on Zoom. I feel like the guys went this year, but I couldn't because I was looking after my phagia. So yeah, we might go this year.

There's been no talk of it though, but I don't know. I don't want to speak on behalf of the FX network. Yeah. Are you doing more what we we do in the shadows? Yes, we're doing series six. It's definitely happening. Oh my God, you've done a show that's had six series. I know, it's so mad.

It's so bizarre, so weird. And it's just so weird. I'm obviously blessed. You've had lots of different sort of actors coming in and out of the show, right? Yeah, we have lots of lovely guest stars yeah amazing oh best guest star oh well what did you think i was i thought it was an actor called Bas Gaster. And I was like, I don't know who that is.

This week's guest star, Bas Gaster. Bas Gaster. I'll be playing the role of Michael this week on Bas Gaster. What are you asking? Oh, who the best one is. Yeah, yeah, best. Or one of them. Obviously, Al Roberts from Stath, even though i didn't have any scenes with him but just having him in my vicinity vicinity you're in

virginity in my virginity obviously him being in my inside my virginity on set was having a pal from um the old smoking london was so lush so he he by far and away, but that's for personal reasons. I would say Fred Armisen was very funny and nice. Oh, yeah. Because you have to be, I have to come clean and say, I haven't seen all of those six series. What are you talking about? You've not watched, well, there's not been six yet.

Actually, five hasn't come out. Or five. So you've not watched 40 episodes of vampire comedy. Not yet. Hey, you know, do you know who I mean by David Sedaris? Yes, of course I do. So there's a bit in his diaries where he is talking about the moment that his father dies and he's talking about how quickly they got over it because he didn't get on well with his dad. Yes, I think, I feel like I may have heard this because my brother went to see him.

Yeah. And absolutely worships him. And he said five minutes after we heard the news, we were talking about our new favourite vampire show. And I was thinking, well, what else could that be other than what we do in the show? And then you realise he's just discovered Muffy the Vampire Slayer. It's a compulsion that leads you to explore that leading edge of everything. Yeah.

I'm still a curiosity seeker. I'm looking at the idiosyncrasies of things. A mountain or a tree is the manifestation of forces that we are not capable of dealing with i'm very drunk in this how do you feel though when people ask about your dad is it something that you don't want to talk about or is it something that is it something that immediately just makes you very unhappy and it's a weird one isn't it because it is probably the worst thing in my life at the moment like a real real bummer real downer and the worst it's getting with him the work they're like the darker your brain like

the darker the thing but then I'm also like it's a thing you know Alzheimer's affects so many people and there is so little development and treatment for it which is wild because there is you know it's 2023 guys but you know I guess it is just like a really tough thing to deal with but there is like there's I've read a lot of stuff about how like there's been very little in the way of like treatment for it has like advanced over the years um which is frustrating when you're like but i want him to be okay i want to give him a pill and make it better i mean it's just the saddest thing in the world for me personally but then i i do think that talking about it maybe if it would help someone else who's dealing with it

I guess it like my friend I had dinner with him the other night and he told me that he was talking about how his mum has it and it was like oh god like I'm not the only because I think when bad things happen to you you sort of go why me it's only me why why is life so cruel and then you're like oh I don't know maybe there's a sense of like sharing the load if you hear that other people you're like it makes you feel better in a way i don't know so that's why i'm conflicted it's like i don't want to talk about it because it becomes so depressing it's absolutely miserable and then i look at my dad who i just think is the most incredible like anyone does about their parents well most people if you're lucky enough to think that about

your parents you're not really middle of the road you're not sort of like yeah it's either you hate them or you're like you're the best and I think I think my I think it's more that they're my the people like my dad who saw the life he had are going away now and that to me is like oh god i'm gonna get sad like that to me you're like the perspective you have the things you saw even like the way he sees london is that's that's going away and that to me is just like so sad and also that he's has a had a very very tricky life and just has always been just made the best of everything and so you're like why did you have to then at the end of it forget everything do you think though does it worry you that

i mean there's so many things that are difficult about it aren't there and there's so many things that are difficult about it, aren't there? And there's so many things that trigger worries for yourself as well, watching someone you love go through that. And is that something that you're anxious about as well and for yourself at the end of your own life? Of course. I mean, I guess it just is like I look at my dad and I'm like, it's coming to an end. This thing you've had, this life.

Yeah, that's the main thing, isn't it? It's coming to an end and like actually watching that, knowing that there's no hope. There's no like, oh no, no, but don't worry. And I think that's just the same with aging, right? It's just the way it is. You do, there is a, and I think we are very protected because we are so lucky to be alive at a time of

like even though i was like saying there's not enough innovation with alzheimer's but with you know we live we're living longer we live relatively peaceful comfortable lives you know well i certainly have a few hundred years ago yeah yeah so comparatively that's not to say that there isn't a lot of horrific stuff happening but you know comparatively i think i guess we've become i have anyway in my life detached from death and i don't think i feel like when my dad was growing up like the stories he tells me about his village you know like when people would die they'd be left out and you have to you pass them every day or like every day leaving them out for people to pay their respects like in the middle of the village and maybe

because we live in a city i don't know what it is but you don't have that relationship with death whereas i feel like back in the day maybe because people died younger or especially my dad who grew up in a village with nothing you know it is like stick stone fire life death sex you know like it's like elemental yeah the the the things that are like the basics so that's been really like wild because everything in my life all the big dramas have been like relationships and friendships and yeah like illness but then getting better and and then you're like oh there's this one big thing that's been hovering above all of this and like work and paying the bills and and there's a big thing that's like i don't care about any of that stuff because i'm coming and that's um the big d I don't care about any of that stuff because I'm coming.

And that's the big day. That, I suppose, is part of the reason for the whole apocalypse culture thing, isn't it? Yeah. It's not just anxiety about climate crises and things like that. It is a generation trying to get their heads around something that has been absent from the culture for quite a long time. Yeah. And that we have been protected from. Yeah. And so it's like, well, we've got to start preparing for it.

I mean, my instinct is always to want to push those things away and stick my head in the sand. Of course you do. And I'm one of these people that, you you know i love my escapist entertainment but at some point as you say you you have to uh to use a mark maron word reckon with it but yeah i think the thing is if you don't reckon with it and that is completely fine because that's what i've i've i'm someone who you know my parents were a bit older when they had me i have a very big family on my dad's side and actually on my mom's side and my godmother died and i was in the hospice with her so like i faced a lot of death

right which is on like a lot of my friends you know they've been to their grandparents funeral and that's about it so i i have had to have it in my life. It's not like I was completely like, well, people don't die. But it's your dad. It's your dad. And it's the sort of slow departure that is so painful, I suppose. Yeah, I think it's just, if you don't face it,

it will come no matter what. And people always say that, don't they? They're like, you know, life's shit. Life's tough. Life's hard. And I think it's pretty, it's kind of, well, within my friends, kind of common to have quite a nice life for quite a long time. And you don't, maybe you have bumps and knocks,

but you're sat with your dad and he's asking you who you are. And you're like, that's your whole identity as a, you know, and that's like, oh, this is nasty. This is like, and he's like looking at you confused, being like, do I know you? And you're like, I think so. Yeah. Yeah, I came from your willy. I came from, you're the willy, I think the temperature in your legs, I came from that.

And he's like, really? Oh, and yeah, wild wild it's a wild ride is he sort of distressed from one moment to the next it is just miserable but yes there are times where he's like all of a sudden quite lucid oh really what lucid and remembering things yeah and like and he's like having a bit of a moment and actually this is so boring but his alzheimer's medication which is i think is helping i do believe is helping like it doesn't stop it but it's supposed to slow it he ran out of it recently and um apparently it like basically we were like having to before we got the next position we had to kind of like give him a little bit less to try and prolong the what we had left and actually what turns out is that I looked it up and it makes him really really tired so he wasn't taking it

and obviously in that short moment you're like it's so hard because he was I had way more energy and was way less tired so was and then with that came a little bit more like knowing what was going on but then you're like but we can't just stop or stop altogether because you know if we do what's going to happen is it just going to be like he can't speak anymore or something but but no I'm like I'm lucky that it's getting worse which I kind of like thought that it would just we'd get the diagnosis and then it would be like, dad's a bit forgetful. How old was he when he was diagnosed? That was about three or four years ago now. So like 78, 77 maybe, which is like a ripe old age.

And he's lived a very long life. old age and he's lived a very long life it's just it's just so weird to have someone that you know so well and knows you so well just forget everything just forget it just completely forget and yeah it's but don't haven't you been through a process of kind of telling yourself that that's not really him anymore, that he's sort of checking out? Yeah, and that's what's really sad because it's like you're grieving him and yet he's still alive. You're like, there are so many times, like especially over Christmas when we were like really together every day. Whereas just like me and my brother just like just like cooking but just crying just like or just like you're like tidying up you're just like just like weeping and he's just sat there like completely in his own world but he is still there he is still alive and every now and

then he says something or does something or he still looks the same he still has ridiculously long nails for a strong sharp nails um he's still got his clothes on and you you know you don't know do you because you can't ask the question so you can't be and you can't he can't really he finds it really hard to understand often when you ask a really simple question so you're like what if you are in there i just, you know, like dust you off as a corpse. Like, you're still here, sat in the room with me. Anyway, absolute bummer way to end this, but it is the truth. And in the truth, there is joy? I don't know.

Well, it's good, I suppose, for a couple of people like us who are frightened of going, exploring in our own heads to confront a bit of painful reality oh for sure that's the thing is like i'm really conflicted about it because i do think like you know you've you're what you're going through with your power is so painful and like presumably you're not going and watching a lot of films about people with dementia god no those there are so many there's loads so many and i'm like stay away demon evil and what you want is to be made to forget for a while and to laugh and a hundred percent i just want to escape pure escapism that's you just want to when you've had like when i've spent the day

with him it's been really hard i just want to go home and like what did i watch the other day just loads and loads of keeping up appearances the like old bbc sitcom of who's just it's just the patricia outlage is giving the performance of her lifetime it's absolutely just keeps for just like a woman just falling over hedges was higher synth bouquet higher synth bouquet the bouquet residence lady of the house speaking unbelievable comedy but yeah yeah definitely that definitely escapism you know and you just like really love someone and you just want them i just think he's great and you just want him to you're just like oh don't go i'm having such a nice time with you don't go i'm having such a nice time with you sorry tash oh i'm really sorry yeah it's hot it's shit i mean you've gone oh god we're both crying now it's hard it's really it's really

oh i'm so sorry i made everyone cry i asked you the question i'm sorry i'm more sorry than you are you should be what have you done we were talking about mushrooms 20 minutes ago we were laughing and laughing about mushrooms and then i thought oh yeah ask a really heavy question yeah um yeah this is what happened but you know i guess it's like it's a testament to him that like i i think he's so great and i love him so much and i think that like what more can you want i've heard something on a podcast recently actually about um what's the meaning of life or they were like pondering the meaning of life or something and they were like what is our purpose what is the meaning of it and then i think it was like just walk around a grave like walk around a graveyard and it's like see what's written on the graveyards and it's all like mother teacher

artist father uncle sister brother friend and you're like like that is what my dad was he was just like he is just like the best dad in the world sorry so it's like you did it you know like and I want I don't know there's still I just listened to that and was like yeah it's like you did it you know like and i want i don't know there's still i just listened to that and was like yeah that's like that is what my dad did he was like a friend and a dad and a brilliant brother and like he meant so much to all the people he did all the jobs he did all the things oh god this is, this is so embarrassing. Oh, man. God almighty. Wow.

Here we go. Yeah, I told you this would be fun. Come on. You have to face it. You can't have the laughter's good because the crying's bad. Right? Something in that. Well, we were talking before about comedy and why some people feel obliged to do certain kinds of more hard-hitting superficially hard-hitting comedy yeah and maybe get themselves in trouble exploring certain controversial areas

and topics and i was saying that i think part of the reason is that nowadays when there are so many things going on in the world so many uh social revolutions happening that need to happen i think a lot of comedians feel like what the shit am i doing how am i helping anything doing my stupid clowning around well i think it's the same with like award ceremonies isn't it it's like you know you have this thing of like that's where you have so many actors going up pledging pledging their allegiance to something or doing, because it's like- Yeah, because they feel like they're doing a stupid pointless job

that no one gives a fuck about really. But of course they do and it's important. And that's what, to go back to Station Eleven, I think that's what Station Eleven is about a little bit. And I think my wife finds it slightly insufferable because it's basically about a troupe of actors and the whole philosophy of the thing is the show must go on right right and that this is all we have is is to cheer each other i always think the show must go on is like a real basic bitch but like thing of like it's replicated in life like that's how i feel about my dad it's

like yeah it's like well what do i do when he home? Do I just literally go and put my head in a bin and pour boiling hot water over my head just to try and forget how miserable that was? You shouldn't do that. Or do I, you know, you're just like, oh, no, I'll just warm up some soup and turn on... Heisent Bouquet.

Heisent Bouquet. And we move, as Ellie always says. We move. The moral of my story is actors are incredibly important. And they deserve more money. And they deserve more money and more praise and more acclaim and more nice dresses. And if there's one group of performers

that are even more important than actors, it's comedians. The clowns. The clowns. The clowns. Send in the clowns. For God's sake, send in the clowns. Send in the clowns to this podcast

because I have made it miserable yeah i'm really sorry i feel like i've totally traumatized you no god but like this is what i mean about like you have to live in reality like i can't that's what we're talking about right like you know like burying your head in the sand it's like it doesn't you can your head can be in the sand but people are still going to be doing smelly poos in the toilet you can't smell them because your nose is full of sand but let me tell you they stink wait this is an advert for Squarespace. Every time I visit your website, I see success.

Yes, success. The way that you look at the world makes the world want to say yes. It looks very professional. I love browsing your videos and pics and I don't want to stop. And I'd like to access your members area and spend in your shop. These are the kinds of comments people will say about your website

if you build it with Squarespace. Just visit squarespace.com slash Buxton for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, because you will want to launch, use the offer code Buxton to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. So put the smile of success on your face with Squarespace. Yes. Continue. Hey, welcome back, podcats. That was Tash Dimitriou there.

And a reminder that there is a link for the Dementia UK charity in the description of today's podcast. They have a free helpline that is staffed by their dementia specialist admiral nurses who can provide practical and emotional support with any aspect of dementia. There's a number in the description or you can visit dementiauk.org. And Tash was understandably gloomy about the pace of advances in Alzheimer's research, but just this morning as I record this, there was a story in the news about scientists in the UK and Belgium making valuable new discoveries about how Alzheimer's affects the brain. And also to, you know, try and be optimistic as well, I would say that the flip

side of some of the alarming stories recently about how powerful AI is becoming is that you've got to hope AI is going to be helping scientists increase the speed of new discoveries and new treatments for dementia. I'm trying to get on side with AI so that we'll be friends when they take over. Now, look, square pusher collab. This is not a joke. This is real. We've already had one special appearance from a comedy legend on this episode. Now it's time for a legend of electronic music. Tom Jenkinson, aka Squarepusher. And yeah, we did do a little collab earlier this year. Plopped out a collab. And it was based around a little section of a song that I did about wearing shorts.

It's called Shorts. If you came and saw me on my book tour in 2021, I used to sing it at the beginning of shows. And Squarepusher mashed up my vocal from Shorts with a tweaked version of one of his old tracks and he made it available for download on band camp a month or two ago as part of an effort to raise funds for a not-for-profit music venue in Chelmsford called Hot Box that has been struggling since the COVID lockdowns. And actually that band camp link is no longer up. But if you promise to click on the link in the description to the crowdfunder page for Hot Box and make a donation,

then I will play you the square pusher mix of shorts right now. If you're unable to make a donation obviously that's fine but please do not hear shorts when I play wearing shorts. I wear them when the weather's warmer. And for sports, I like to feel the breeze on my shins and knees. Shorts. Shorts. Shorts. Shorts. Shorts. Shorts. Shorts. Not everybody likes my shorts.

Not everybody wants to see my middle-aged man legs. Shorts. You're not a schoolboy now. It's time you got yourself a pair of long trousers. Shorts. That is an actual kind of collaboration between myself and Tom Jenkinson, a.k.a. Squarepusher, in the aid of Hotbox in Chelmsford, one of the many excellent music venues that have been struggling in hard times. So if you're able to help them out with a donation or just go down there

have a drink see what's going on at the hot box that would be great of you there's a link in the description i'm throwing a lot of info at you this episode because i've been away for so long so i hope you're not feeling overloaded i've got a couple more things to mention and then I'm out. This is a plug for another music legend and former podcast guest, Brian Eno. He is doing a couple of rare live performances, very seldom plays live. But he is at the Royal Festival Hall in London on the 30th of October of this year, 2023. Hall in London on the 30th of October of this year, 2023, and the performance features an orchestral adaptation of his 2016 album, The Ship, with the Baltic Sea Philharmonic, and they are an unusual orchestra in that they play standing up entirely from memory.

Two performances of The Ship on the 30th of October, one at 6.30 and one at 9pm, and they will also feature, during one track, vocal contributions from comedian Peter Serafinowicz. Peter was on the original album on one section, and he's going to be there that night. I will not be on stage that night, but I do hope that I will be in the audience,

and I hope that I might get to see some of you. Link in the description to the Brian Eno event at the Royal Festival Hall. I am going to be seeing some of you at the Royal Festival Hall later in the year on December the 12th for the live recording of the Christmas podcast with Joe Cornballs Cornish and that went on sale a couple of months back and sold out quicker than we expected so I wasn't able to tell you about it on the podcast.

I apologize if you would have liked to have gone along but didn't hear about it or couldn't get tickets. You will, of course, still be able to submit made-up jokes, amazing anecdotes, etc. for possible inclusion. There is a link to the events page of my blog in the description today which will give you details of where to send your submissions for the Christmas podcast. And on that page,

there are also details of another live show that I've got coming up in a few weeks. I'll be talking on stage to the comedian and writer Dune McKeegan, co-creator of Smack the Pony and performer in shows like Brass Eye,

The Day to Day, Knowing Me, Knowing You with my pal Alan Partridge Toast of London She's going to be talking to me about a book she's written called Lady Parts about her career in comedy thus far and her experience of being a woman in it A woman? That's going to be at Mannington Hall near Norwich

on Saturday the 7th of October at 4pm. So maybe I'll see you at one of those things. All right, that's a lot of info I hit you with. I apologise. Thanks very much once again to Tash Dimitriou. I'm suddenly very aware of how crunchy this section of track is I hope that doesn't put you off is crunchy track

a good ASMR thing? I don't know, thank you as well to Helen Green she does the artwork for the podcast I love it thanks to ACAST for their continued support thanks especially to Seamus Murphy Mitchell as ever for his ongoing and

invaluable production support and conversation editing. But thanks most of all to you for coming back, listening right to the end. I appreciate it. I'll be putting out new episodes regularly from now until Christmas, so I hope you can join me for some of those. It's been ages. Let's have an awkward hug, shall we? Come on. Hey. Good to see you. Yeah, I know, I smell a bit. If it's in any way the kind of thing that might cheer you up,

I thought you might like to know that I love you. Bye! Bye. Give me like a smile and a thumbs up Nice like a plant with a button pop Give me like and subscribe Like and subscribe Give me like and subscribe Like and subscribe Give me like a smile and a thumbs up Give me like a smile and a button pop Give me like a smile and a button pop

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