The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Amateur Rappers
Episode Date: January 3, 2023The guys review a new batch of awful, wannabe rap stars. ...
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On Big J. Ocarson, I'm Dan Soder.
You can listen to full two hour long episodes of the Bonfire?
Two hours!
That's a real commitment to us.
Well, it's on Series XM or with the SXM app.
And now, the Bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Dan Soder.
I mean, do Rund Wendy Williams is doing terrible now?
Have you seen that?
No, new information?
It just, I saw a video, someone on Twitter tagged us in a video of, uh,
Wendy Williams, like, trying to walk to a building, and she asked the paparazzi for help.
She looks like really sick.
It looks really bad.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think it's real sad.
Uh, I saw a thing where she was like being nonsensical hanging out of a car, like talking to people. Yeah, I think it's real sad. Oh, I saw a thing where she was like being nonsensical hanging out of a car
Like talking to people. Yeah, I think it's like your eyes are all fucking wacky
But everything's a reason like those eyes are bugged for some reason. Yeah, I mean that Netflix documentary about her that'll come out in three years will be
You know to be fantastic or who
Revolution revolutionary. Oh, and they tell us exactly what the problems are yeah, I like the real stuff
Revolution revolutionary. Oh, and they tell us exactly what the problems are. Yeah, like the real stuff
Does she hide it? I don't think so. I think image wise. Yeah. Yeah, she tries to keep away from it When you build your whole career talking shit about other people and then you have a lot of stuff that people want to talk about
I probably are like
Don't tell me about it. She's like sure. I don't know that girl ugly like shut up for all guys
Why can't you walk to the door? She'll be at me
Yeah, my leg don't work. Yeah girl. I'm scared everything. How you doing?
How you doing? I'll do it pretty bad. I'm failing
My body's giving out on
How you doing? I'm more science than person
I'm stuck together by to bust and lot. Oh man, so wealthy. Man, her
and Pete Davidson are living such different wealthy lives right now. He goes, I'm over here
getting all the pussy I can handle. I'm crushing it. For beings of the press, a lot of
pictures I'm smiling for the last few years. I just wonder like I want I'm interested
to see where the standup goes, because like one of the bits about when you're like
Hey, so I fuck up, huh?
Pussy he's going to be well
He's either gonna have employee people to write him good jokes, which I think is what's happening
His delivery will depend on his delivery will be good because he's gonna be
Confident no matter what there's no room. He walks into where they're not stoked to see him.
Crazy. You know what I mean? Yeah. But again, he seems to be in this, you know, his skills may develop on this too, which is
Standard blog talking about. He's very good actor and everything's very funny comic, but I mean like
His skills like I don't know what he seems like now if he gets negativity though and like the last few things
We've had like it goes bad. He'll be like I'll just leave like I'll leave a car about you know
I mean like and when he left the stress factor
You can imagine one of us trying to leave being like I'm out of here and then they're like okay
We're gonna sue you and you're like well then I'll stay for what?
for what? what don't though um yeah
man good for him do you know I'm saying though I'm a charm life yeah bad stuff
in a charm life yeah one big baddie and how many was young as hell too I think
right that is a good question do you take the one bad thing when you're very tiny. Yes. And then have this pair.
Yeah.
That guy, dude, Stavros had such a...
Christine's mom died, young,
just gave her a lifelong emotional problem.
Me too, dude.
I haven't been able to let people into him.
Damn near 40.
Stavros had a really funny tweet where he was like,
when it was announced that Pete Davidson was dating Emily
Rache- Shakowski.
I'm Rada.
I'm Rada.
His style roast was like, damn dude, give me a time machine.
I'll go back to September 10th, 2001 and some of my dad up for the FDNY.
That's funny, dude.
I found it.
I'm just gonna get warped there with your dad and go,
dad, you're gonna be here or a wait here.
Dad, just fucking stand here.
You're gonna be here or I'll wait here. Dad, just fucking stand here. You're gonna be a fucking legend.
94, I would have driven Gary to,
or I had Gary meet me in Oklahoma City.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Just stand in this lobby, dude.
Just stand in this lobby.
You get to go, listen, please,
I just need a martyr in my life.
I need someone to die in a positive way,
not in a sad real way.
Really helping people out of possible.
Is he the only person whose parent died in 9-11 that's famous?
Probably there are more that we don't know about. There's got to be like some other person.
But it's his like I mean that's like kind of
He's a comic dog face. That's so funny though if you get like pull someone aside he goes hey actually that's kind of my thing
There's a comic dog face that got uh he was a security guard.
They're also and got killed from the black circuit um and then dude
speaking of stuff like that there's a comic I won't say his name
because also I think it's awesome. I don't understand it but I find it to be
very awesome when someone is in an awkward place in life
like didn't make it or like you know not really moving forward and they're awesome when someone is in an awkward place in life.
Like didn't make it or like, you know, not really moving forward in their like career and doing something else.
And like a nightmare when I used to run karaoke, good example of that.
Sure.
And comics who like open for me sometimes would pop in and be like, you know,
Hey, here's a $20 tip.
Put me on next dick face.
And you're like, nah, I'm not taking tips.
And go, oh, shit, I'm not taking tips.
And they go, oh shit, I'm opening for you.
I remember that story.
Yeah.
Several things like that happened when I was doing it.
I saw one the other day, a comedian
from the black circuit who now drives Uber.
Also, as a picture of like little rel got in his Uber
and it's the picture of them like smiling
like from the front seat and back seat together like it took a picture of him like oh man
Oh man oh man
This is a guy that was on deaf jam for sure. You know what I mean?
Well, there's that homeless guy comes right here. Oh, they did comic view. Oh face man. Yeah, he's not around here
Does he come right here? He came around remember we were out front of
face man. Yeah, he's not around here. Does he come around here? He came around. Remember we were out front of
Serious and he walked up and he was like, Jave
You funny man really and you're like he's like funny man
He kept saying that to you. Oh, yeah
Yeah, no, he was like famous from comic well
He was comic view famous before that that. Face man's comedy was like a lot of rhyming stuff.
It was like always like that.
He's being prophetic, but I'm a face man.
You see him outside and you're like, oh buddy.
He's a man, oh dude, he's asked when he was back in the day,
he asked me for money outside the comic strip ones.
He used to be outside the comic strip.
He would try to squeegee people's windows,
they had stories. Like he ran up the drugs yeah yeah yeah for sure
damn it's face man damn when he had it together he seemed like fine and then he would get it back together a little bit
that's gotta be weird get back into the game that's gotta be weird getting clean you go I was just joking around about that
yeah fuck that shit dude these videos I don't know if you know, we'll get to them.
You want to watch a rap? You want to watch a face-man? I do want to watch girl rap for sure. You want to watch girl rap or monster energy drink is the devil.
Is this face-man keep playing?
Some things that we hear about, but we never see my brother. Have you ever seen the serial number on a condom?
Have you ever seen the serial number on a condom?
No, I guess you don't roll it back that far
Literature thank you here about but you never see and you got so close
Thank you here about
Do blind people see their dreams?
Oh, do they dream about seeing? Can kids and wheelchairs run away from home?
And if they do, should they be caught roll away?
Yikes.
Do people with no arms need the order?
Jacob put this in the system.
Can someone with no fingers point me in the right direction.
Can girls with extensions make free phone calls?
Take them while they get it.
Put the open them up.
It's like cat skills comedy.
Hello! Hello!
What do you do, sir? Beside your wife? All right, okay, they're super hot
The super hot the chicken is cooked and everyone's having a good time
Why I tell you why because you can't take it because if you did take us you wouldn't leave you alone about it
Why do you park in a driveway drive on a park?
That's my favorite there is this fucking
They found I forget which cult it was but last podcast on the left found this cult
where the dude was a like slack comic slash like inspirational guy and he started just
calm.
I'll find out what it was.
Dude, they have his comedy and it's that shit.
It literally is you drive on a dry, you why do you park on a driveway and drive on a
park and it's ripping.
And then by the end he's like, join my cult.
And he goes anyway, if you like what you see,
put on this red square, this red triangle hat.
It's like a four-parter on last part of the world.
A company means this room with a bunch of cauldrons of fire.
Guy was a real piece of shit too, dude fucked up shit.
But he, yeah, he was like a comic.
Oh, so there's a, because of bad behavior,
behavior, I call it bad behavior.
Bad behavior.
And, uh,
bad behavior.
Bad behavior, bad head,
bad head,
bad baby.
And, uh,
and, uh,
and, uh,
and, uh, and, uh,
and, uh,
and, uh,
and, uh, and, uh,
and, uh,
and, uh,
and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh,
and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, and, uh, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and It's bad. I believe in her and Woe Vicki.
All these like bad white girl rappers, because now they think there's like, oh, there's money
in it.
It was there's money in it.
You just see replicas.
And I've saved two bad white wrapping ladies.
One of them just looks like a gang bang about the start.
Her?
Yeah, you're right.
It really does.
It's just three black dudes in a kitchen standing behind a white lady in a juicy sweatshirt.
Guys, they's loving it's funny about
like seeing that like a gang bag,
like just a rhyming of porn.
Yeah.
Was, which I'm gonna call it,
at a post for the SDR show,
they're trying to get us nominated
for an AVN award.
Okay, that's fun.
For the dope podcasts, which be awesome,
to go to the AVN.
That would be very fun.
Especially as a nominee and you didn't get,
you don't have a gaping buttle.
And then so this porn star, so hot, Jane Wilde,
it's a W-I-L-D-E, Jane Wilde,
I had a message from her in my,
like, message request or whatever.
And it just, it was a response to that thing
and it was like, come to the AVNs.
And so I come to you know, just regular and I go, damn, I go, I don't get me sexy.
I go, I'm trying.
She I go, I wrote, I'm trying.
And I go, oh, you like listen to the show.
And just so funny, I was like, I already started looking up like her pictures and stuff to be like,
oh, I can get a, this girl's a fan, I can smack it around to,
to just the idea that she knows who I am is great.
And then I was like, I was like, oh, you're, she basically wrote back like, no!
Like, I just saw the message, so I was like,
or not the message, I just saw like the story, so,
I think I saw you kill Tony once.
That's so funny.
I guess I'm like that. She has some kind of end to it. I fuck dudes with like regular story. Come to the age of years. She's like, I think I saw you kill Tony once. That's so funny. I guess that's something like that.
She has some kind of end to it.
I fuck dudes with like regular bodies.
No, buddy.
She gets, it's exclusive, vicious anal.
She rules.
Yeah.
I saw two black guys giving her the biz before I found out.
She didn't really know who I was at all
and it took everything away from her.
Ah.
Ah. I was like, oh, I thought you knew me. So this is the way. She went come really know who I was at all. It took everything away from it. I was like,
oh, I thought you knew me. So she went coming the way. And then you wrote happy, belated
things.
Yeah. Hard pass. Sorry. I had some articles about you. And it is not cool. But that girl got
blacked. Yeah. Well, this looks like an advertisement for black.com.
I'm sure it became that at some point. But now they're just like letting these, it's got 2.3 million
views. Yeah, but not because it's good. But it's so funny that people don't realize like,
they don't know their views are for laughs. Yeah. They track, they tack every one of them on in
their minds to positive. Oh, shit, dude. This is getting spread around people love it. I mean look at Amy baby
Yeah, I mean, but that's that's one of our queens. Yeah, she knows it's over for her. She's done. She had already done
She had a one-hit wonder already tried to get the one
With my hands held huh fuck them all fuck them all. Fuck them all. Fuck them all. Fuck them all. Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all. Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all.
Fuck them all. Fuck them all. Fuck them saying the N-word, she says triggers.
She has a, she looks like her actual face
was like the Avatar people.
Yeah, I go, oh, is this the Battle of Water?
Do she really just, instead of saying the N-word,
she straight up just says triggers.
A walk-down.
Now is that it was?
It's, yeah, you're like, ah, sorry, lady.
I'm the first, now, no, no, no, no, no.
I have a friend that just texted out,
she'll say, what up my N word?
That's what she's like.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
That's lame of shit.
Oh, all right.
Start from the watch.
Start from the get.
Can I tell you something?
The space between her eyes is a decent length soft dick.
Yeah, that's a lot of space.
like soft dick yeah that's a lot of space smart water
she's like a comedy club waitress that has a side. This is like her side project.
Yeah.
She's just in my album.
The most biggest.
I got a lot of things on my wishlist.
A lot of cash on the bags.
The big chicken.
Oh, that guy just unzipped his hoodie.
He's ready.
He's like, how many verses before we start fucking her?
All right, I'm in the video.
And then it looks like the guy in the hat is like her man.
He's like, look at him.'s like really going for it too. That is also not flattering sweatsuit
No My name is Hannah Toto, I'm a fisherman, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my name is Hannah Toto, my called the cringe. Yeah, it's cringe, but that's what so these guys are
Genuinely just waiting till she starts sucking all their dicks. Yeah, one guy's like I got a bulletproof
That's I can put on it's pretty fucking sick. I got like a tactical gear. They're at her parents house
Yeah, these guys are not allowed to be there
It's a reduction going on. There's she has to she gets louder, she gets closer to the phone that's recording her.
Nobody's mic'd up.
You know why?
Because they believe too many iPhone commercials
where they're like, you can make a movie off this
where they showed him filming it.
And they didn't realize that there's a whole sound.
They're also blacks, they think 5G's try to murder them.
It just gives you COVID.
5G gives you COVID.
What are, that's all on YouTube.
I mean, this is a YouTube link, right?
Or is this just a video link?
It's just on Twitter.
It's just on at Daily Loud. Yeah, so I'm, I'm setting it up to right? Or is this just a video? It's just on Twitter. It's just on at Daily Loud.
Yeah, so I'm setting it up to tweet out.
What are the responses like, yeah, you did it girl.
Not one good, not one positive.
There's not one.
Here's the thing, if she was more attractive,
there'd at least be somebody saying like, hot chick though.
Hell no. Is the first response.
And a picture of a cock swinging.
Okay. I do, Twitter is the first response. And a picture of a cock swinging. Okay.
I do, Twitter is the best.
Yeah, Twitter rules.
Twitter rules.
Twitter rules.
So go to at least, you know what I mean?
At least she's at home.
Bring up the other video I sent.
It's another bad white lady wrapping,
but it's in public where you have to be like,
why would you do this?
Hey, white girls, listening out there, don't think you can go around and start saying like try like once they realize what you're doing and they don't know you
They're gonna smack you in your stupid face
Maybe they're not those eyes closer together
Yeah, maybe you take one to the fucking dumb piece you might actually
Yeah, good lord maybe Google those eyes back where they belong
So they haven't fish eyes
Uh, about there, there. No, wait, I think it's the good case of a wide mouth bass. She really does.
Uh, no, this lady, damn, it's gone. I think go up a little further.
Sorry. I think it's something I'm a bump triggers.
No, no, go to the DMs I sent you because I sent them.
Oh, that's her. they just showed her actual Twitter thing
What her thing it's like jaw something sounded off
Yeah, right there. This is her go July. No, no, nope. That's not at all what I said
Follow the fish down stream
Yeah, everything legal. Music video below. Oh, hello. Before we jump,
Dan, you're ready to jump topics so quick. I know. I do cocaine. You get so scared,
a jake of yelling at you that we talk about one thing too long. He's gone now. He's
free. We can turn him off with this music video. Now she's just hanging out with a bunch of white dudes. Yes it is.
It sounds like she's saying everything in word.
I think she is.
Who are these dudes? These guys are the worst!
Tweet this out!
These guys are ridiculously bad.
Who are the... She hired those black guys to sit there and smile behind her.
Yeah.
This reeks of Florida, by the way.
I don't know, it's Callie.
It's Callie. She's in Lent. This reeks of Florida by the way, I don't know it's Kelly
What do you say that she just is I can tell this is like Palmdale like she's fat
Well, whoa not one of them can dance she can dance. There's her sister that's an illegal thing probably.
What else does she have? What else is on her page?
Julya Hollis.
Damn roasted.
He just got Evans. welcome to the Christine zone you just got advanced serene you just got Evan essence
heavens god this is garbage god I love only fine garbage and I know I want to jump
topics I'm a little fucking raccoon
I like to dig through the trash somebody called her co-cacity
Oh
Co-cacity that's how you say that makes sense
Co-cacity she is a she's a pig
I love this song and the video.
I love the song though.
The video, it's creepy to me.
Even if it really were her, I'm so sorry girl.
I'm sure your grade is nothing personal at all.
Dantitve shot the video by yourself.
Super creepy.
It is a super creepy video.
Why is the child there?
Because the mom is probably like, bring your little sister along. It is a super creepy video. Why is the child there? Everything is awesome.
Because the mom is probably like,
bring your little sister along.
That's what it is.
Who are these dudes?
I sent you where one girl is pregnant
and the other one's holding her baby the entire time.
That guy looks like skinny Chris far.
Yeah, right.
That guy looks like skinny Chris Farley on the right.
He doesn't know what to do.
This guy's like, he's pants up.
Put this video out.
I saw. A-S-O-K. I mean, it's going out Thursday. What else does she have? Farley on the right. He doesn't know what to do this guy's like I can his pants up put this video out
A ace okay. I mean it's going out Thursday. What else does she have?
I Know I would actually rather watch
Summer rain free Danielle
Yes, and also shout out some rain a true queen true queen trap. Please
Hey, I have to watch my sister lock eyes. Guys, my mom's got to work
again tonight. I know we're filming this music. Mom, I'm doing my music video tonight. Watch
your sister. I don't care. You make stank face in the video. I don't like it. I just wish she had that aim right down the screen is the internet but she's never came
So I'm just clicking up. I might do better
You might find your body face up in that news letter
Which one of these sisters succeeds in life the young more you think the young one doesn't ever shot
I think she I think she eventually rises her sister
Someone's gonna point at she's gonna read comments and see like oh
She's telling me that this is the greatest thing and people love it, but it's actually everyone's laughing at it.
Yeah.
No one likes it at all.
Except her friends and these five black guys would keep coming over every day.
Yeah, and then leaving immediately after something happens.
And then they all go in the room for a little bit.
I hear some screams and noises.
I hear some tussles.
Dude, that music sucks so bad that you're like you're right her little sister's gonna see that
And then she's like that's my one on straight and narrow and I learned that I
Really, yeah, you sent us in the chat. Yeah, I said nobody watch. I asked Dan if he saw it
I didn't see it. We don't trust your humor
This was crazy for so I didn't know if it was like a real
But it looks real well. She's for real like a she's for real pregnant right? Oh, I don't know about that. That's for real pregnant for you sure
That's a real kid, but I don't know if she's really pregnant
That would be funny if she went through I could I was in the makeup chair by 5 a.m
Yeah, she is it's like they told me it's the same amount of makeup chair as Jim Carrey and Grinch
Summer Walker's like a singer. Yeah, she I only know her name because she was one of the few people getting my old man
Shit where she came out in an award show and I'm like lady. I
Mean everyone can see your nipples and shit. It's like great. someone's all those nipples and put a baby in her tell you
I think so you can tell from even two seconds of listening to this
But I will say this she's talentless and
Those babies have a rough life
I'm a hoochie mama slash She's Her baby while she's holding the baby while she's singing this also she calls herself scallywag. I like that
Goat scallywag
Do you think these girls ever want to jail? They're calling you a bitch is so funny
She's like I love you and you everything, but if you go to jail you're gonna be a bitch. All right go
I mean do you think these I want to hurt I want them to run into the last girl
Yeah, do you think these girls like ever just have like a calm moment of like hey?
You want to just like quietly watch a movie at home tonight?
It's got good Chinese.
No, dude.
Or is it always just like,
Hey, I'm gonna hold my baby and pop my pussy real quick.
I love it.
That there's a trend right now.
What?
Well, holding your baby and popping your pussy.
Holding baby, popping your pussy.
Just hold that baby, pop that pussy.
A.
Well, you know what's funny is that's what I was joke around
about Megan the stallion, like what she was on SNL. Every sketch was like, okay, so Megan, you're what's funny is that's what I was joke around about Megan the stallion like which is on snl
Every sketch was like okay, so Megan you're like
Sexy in this just every sketch they do with like Chris Hemsworth. Yeah, where's like every shirt that can you take your shirt off?
He's like okay, I think some other stuff. Okay, tight my shirt off if you walk I can't find that other white wrapper
But it's like a lady in public
again with like Four black dudes behind her.
And she's just spaz rapping.
Look up best white girl rap, funniest white girl rap videos.
I mean, summer ring.
We got a shot.
Why me?
She's the queen.
She is.
That's screech.
Titan up, Titan up, Titan up, Titan up.
She still taxi every day every day
Jay every day 100% of days
Every day just like what just like what's up?
What's up baby boo she doing the Christmas show is she
One was just flat out would we be interested in managing her as a unit the bonfire
I mean yes and signed along the died look dude. We could fucking
Barry Gordy this bitch
that I'd let you we could fucking bury Gordy this bitch we could take we could come in and fucking treat we'd be the Colonel dude we can just take everything we
could film it and then leave it with nothing leave it with summer land some
fucking trailer and mid-Florna Tyna, Tyna, Tyna, Tyna. Waaaaaaaaaah! No, these are good ones. That's the funniest I said look up.
Waaaaaaaaaah!
Waaaaaaaaaah!
That sounds SCAS the Groundhog.
That needs managing alright.
No, go dude.
Fuck me. I'm calm on the cold minds. It's fuck me guys.
It doesn't really matter.
It's not about me fellas.
I'm gonna put my phone up to my laptop you tell me that this doesn't blow your mind
And you go and you hear in the back of your arm you go. What was that guys stop singing for a second?
So what was that you said you sign her sign here? I've got I've got Jimmy Iveen on the
and
We're in a bidding war between her and Geffen if If we can somehow get the satellite signal into Mr. Big's car.
I heard that.
I wouldn't dumb idea.
If we can get the satellite signal to transfer down to his car, he'll see it.
He'll come to our house in Aurora.
Illinois.
Shout out to the second place of Aurora.
Everyone knows the real Aurora is in Colorado.
Real Aurora.
Oh, Aurora. real Aurora's a Colorado real Aurora oh Aurora
Party tear right there where my skin huh huh fuck them all fucking back tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt ttt ttt ttt ttt ttt ttt ttt ttt ttt ttt tttt ttttt tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do it. Don't don't say anything. This is just for you Jay. Is that Amy of a baby?
I don't know.
It is not.
I close enough.
That's a black woman.
Are we sure?
Amy of a baby is a AMI, by the way.
Oh, she's doing it to the song.
I wonder.
Amy of a baby is AMI.
Hey.
Learn the lady's name, would you?
Oh my god.
Are you sure it's AMI? I think it's AMI.
Is it? Yeah.
I didn't think it was.
It's AMI.
Do you hope if you're one of these ladies that you just have like an internet hit like this so you can go to, so you can go to only fans?
It's not a bad move
What you're gonna rely on is people doing it for that immediate, you know, I mean the big old boss guy could have started
And only fans for a minute never him
There was a swing or couple it wasn't even the couple it was they were with their other people at front row of one of my shows and Philly
Yeah, wait they were with their other people at the front row of one of my shows in Philly Yeah, great. They were a swing or a couple
Mm-hmm, but they were with their side pieces. They were with the people they were swinging with yeah and but they were both there the guy was
Just it was an Italian somebody was bald wearing like a a great like loud button down shirt. Yes
I assume had some dough.
Wasn't like it was an ugly guy or anything,
was just like an older or whatever.
This girl was, it was the show my mom was at.
This girl was gorgeous.
I offered them to my parents.
That's funny.
I was like, Joe, mom, you guys wanna get down?
You guys wanna get down with a couple of 60-something year olds?
That's so funny.
It's so late.
The lady was crazy hot.
Crazy hot.
And I just said, I sit down.
Who'd you with the Italian. Yeah
But they were a couple
They were I mean like they were fucking that night or they was sex club
They said but they belong to other people. Yes, she's married. They're both married somebody else
But they were and they were super happy to talk about it. It was fucking great and hilarious
But my point was with her,
I said somebody I think I made it to only fans joke. Yeah. And she was like, Oh, no, no, no,
I go really just for a play, which I said, I actually admire more that she just does it because
she wants to do it. Yeah. But I did tell her, if you genuinely don't give a shit and it wouldn't
affect your life at all, I was like, right now tonight, you'd have enough subscriptions in this room
to carry you for a few years.
To buy you at least a car. I think it's a couple hundred people following your things
a lot.
It's really hard to not try to figure out how to sell feet picks because that's something
where you're like, you hear that girls have like millions of dollars in their bank accounts
because of feet picks and you're like well okay, I mean that's like
There's a lot of money in it and I know that
Wicked wicked feet wicky feet are you on it? It's got Katie registered as a 5.0 are you on it? No because awful feet
Ralph's on it somehow really Ralph's on wicky feet. I have awful feet. I have caveman feet
Christine why don't you start aitting war for your feet pictures?
Are you okay with that?
And I can't even sign off on it
You're dead. Yeah, you're my lover
I don't love your feet. Well, see you there are men there are men
By the way, there's guys that have foot fetishes that just heard that and we're like oh fucking see yeah
Oh, probably. Oh, okay. Yeah, oh, fuckin' look at you. Probably.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, make your four two percent.
Actors like you love my feet.
I have.
You've done footwork, we all know that you've done
extensive footworkship.
So you have to nothing to Christine's feet in a deck.
You have kissed them and washed them.
Nope, you've had them stop on you.
No, I'm a dead rocker.
I'll tell you about all my kinky things.
It's definitely not feet.
You have a walk on your back and you go, oh, crush me.
Crush me with your perfect.
Oh, oh, oh, for real, oh!
Oh, you pinched my skin, you bitch.
Oh!
I think I'm gonna like it.
Yeah.
I think we're gonna like it here.
DJ Blue.
Dude, falling into the tracks has been a nightmare of mine since I moved to New York City and this lady
Tumble she's tumble sauces into the fucking tracks
Christine is there a video of somebody being alive
Because they're the trains twisted them up. Oh, no, that's the old that's the old fable about being stuck if they move the train or your gut spill out.
That's not like it's a fable, dude. I think it's real.
First of all, fables have animals and morals.
Well,
animal, if you're a person stuck in the treasurer.
It's a maple.
Oh, about the talking vulture who got wrapped up in the train station.
Call it what you will.
Because he wouldn't listen to sage advice as the
moral was. Maybe if someone listened to a wise owl they would be stuck in between a train
and a fucking platform. Can somebody get my family before they move this train? Am I
gut spilling out? Well, looks as if the sixth train is caught
by him between you and platform and you train. You might tell me if you hold me thing hold my organs inside.
I gotta get back to the cherry pie forest.
Train all my guts will fall.
A feeble about talking animals held together by the train.
Can you give my kids a war of tell my love and one more time before I go to that peppermint forest in the sky?
Well, hey, it's me.
You old wise bear.
They told me if I survive I'll have extreme nerve damage.
No one wants a quadriplegic better. I guess I'll just die.
I'm ready, Chiu-Chiu, man.
Hold the train.
I, everyone, remember to be good to everyone.
Don't be the bad guy.
Don't be the bad guy.
Don't be the bad guy.
Don't be the bad guy.
Don't be the bad guy.
Don't be the bad guy.
Don't be the bad guy.
Don't be the bad guy.
Don't be the bad guy. Don't be the bad guy. Don't be the bad guy. Don't be the bad guy. Get these livers one heart. Goodbye.
Oh, Papa, is that you?
That's right.
There you go.
Sorry you got to watch my lights go off.
Oh, I see his dark.
Get these livers one heart.
Goodbye.
Oh, Papa, is that you?
That's right. There you go. Sorry you got to watch my lights go off.
I love love.
We were both born in the same house.
In 1921.
Seven days apart.
In the same hospital.
We both grew up.
We followed the way for the Germans. On the Lower East Side. On the Lansy Street. a part in the same hospital. We both grew up one block away from each other on the
Lower East Side on Delansey Street. My family moved to the Bronx.
We lived on the bottom road. Her's moved when she was 11. I've been on a hundred and eighty
third street. For six years she worked on the fifth work for a very prominent nurse
where I had a practitioner on the 14th floor, the very same building. We never met. Never met.
Can you imagine that?
You know where we met in an elevator.
I was visiting from the Ambassador Hotel in Chicago.
He was on the third floor.
I was on the 12th.
I wrote up nine extra floors just to keep talking to her.
Nine extra floors.
Their love-making must be beautiful.
Big news in my life.
In Danland?
Yeah, Katie and I got engaged.
Hey.
We went away to an upstate and we were like by a creek.
And I was like, man, there's so many elements right now.
I could fumble the ring, but she said yes.
And it's funny because it was like, it could be.
That'd be fun if you were building up to tell what she said.
And she shot me down.
She was like, let me think on it.
And she took the ring and went ill and threw it in the river.
No, man, she was, I completely surprised her.
So that was the best part.
The first time we met, we hated each other.
Now, you didn't hate me, I hated you.
The second time we met, you didn't even remember me.
I did too.
How do we remember you? The third time we met you didn't even remember me. I did too, I remember you.
The third time we met we became friends.
We were friends for a long time.
And then we weren't.
And then we fell in love.
Three months later we got married.
And it only took three months.
Twelve years and three months.
You're two wonderful people who found each other in this crazy world, and I look forward to the real future you make together.
I wish the two of you great love, happiness, and success, Jacob.
Thank you very much, Jacob. That's very lovely. You went on Capella at the end, like Eminem.
Right, please have that letter. Thanks, buddy. I love you, dude.
Thanks for listening. Don't forget that the Bondfires are a radio show, a full show.
We got a studio and everything.
You can listen to us on SiriusXM or on the SXM app.