The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Awkward Cameo
Episode Date: October 7, 2022@thebonfiresxm ...
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And now the bonfire with Big J. Ocerson and Dan Soder.
Man, there's a lot more epic songs you'd love to have playing when you're burning alive.
You know?
Oh my god, yeah.
I mean, this band is the one that had the burning...
This was the collapse of the...
Was it the collapse of the stage of the rug? This is the one that had the burning this was the collapse of the was it the
collapse of the stage of the rush this the fire is the fire they had pyro inside a
small bar because I thought it was 1986 it's insane yeah the bonfire yeah it's
pretty wild that great white had pot they felt he had pyro how many people were there and how many people died if we can get some stats a bunch of people died
Trying to get all those fucking fat white ladies with tits tattoos out of those windows
There was a jam up dude old 1980 sluts old sluts can still scurry
Yeah, but I'm telling you once they hit that thing dude. It's gonna be a hundred people don't milky tits
still scurry. Yeah, but I'm telling you once they hit that thing dude it's gonna be a hundred people to milky tits. Yeah, the soundproofing foam went ablaze. The building was
quickly engulfed in flames and a hundred people died more than 200 were injured. Damn.
Just knowing that 300 people were at a great white concert. Did you just knowing that there
was a guy in the room though? It fuck because he put up that sound proofing. In the second of caught, you're like,
why did I spend $5 less on the sound proofing?
Yeah, it goes back even further to him at the end of the go.
I mean, it'll save you a little bit.
Kind of dangerous, he's like, whatever.
He goes, what is some, what is some assholes gonna come do
pyro in our little bar?
Yeah.
Oh, what is it, 1986?
We're an acoustic venue.
I thought this was Tesla doing a five-man acoustic jam
Damn great white. Hey also if you're family member dies at a great white show
It's not like if they get stomped out at the who where you're like civil court. They saw a new time
Oh, yeah, when you sue great white
We're gonna get a half a pack of Winston's yeah a board of guitar pedals
Nobody wants you want nicky sixes phone number
I lost my
Here's here's guns and roses chicken stuff
Kathy Ireland's underwear. Oh, it's pretty cool
Just great things from the 80s. Yeah, he goes here cool. It's just like, just great thing some yeeties.
Yeah.
He goes, here's a Polaroid of Sharon Stone sucking my dick.
You want a slap bracelet?
What the fuck, dude?
I lost a family member at your show because of a fire.
I give you one of those pencil holder things
where it's like rubber.
Your pencil goes through it.
Sorry.
School store products.
Sorry, chief.
Best I can do is an egg-loo cooler.
I filled with a couple tall boys from the bus.
I got an old stage case that says great white on it.
You ain't want me to make a video for anyone that you're, you know, I could say like happy
birthday.
A year of free cameos.
I get you six months free cameos.
Hey, that's me, that guy from great white.
Just take my word for it.
Man, that has to suck when you buy a cameo for someone
and they don't know who it is.
If they're like, who is this?
And you're like, you know,
that celebrity should have to be there for that moment.
If you make cameos, you should also,
as the celebrity have to be there,
like watch the reaction to be like, fuck, fuck.
Well, a lot of those celebrities don't give a shit
and notice wake up in the morning and start doing them.
You see it?
So like, I got asked again probably three times in the last like few months people on cameo
We've got so many requests. Yeah, yeah
You want to watch me be a prostitute?
I'd rather walk in I'd rather walk in and fish nets and be like hey big boy. Yeah, can I just fuck one guy to go ahead?
Yeah, I got a I got to slightly fuck all of these people.
Their imagination.
But again, that's why I'm saying,
I know who they are,
is because you're getting people to do it.
They do it in the morning while they're like
heating up their pop tarts.
You know what I mean?
It's so great, they're kids,
they get them in a robe and they're like,
hey, it's me that I, Debbie Mays are.
I'm here as happy birthday Greg.
It's Tony Danzer.
I'm making my eggs and I'm not paying attention to my wife.
I haven't put my face on yet.
Yeah, I hear you're in a pretty bad custody battle.
I hope you win, buddy.
Happy birthday for me and Angela.
I'm kidding.
Okay, bye.
And you see, always has either big dumb hands come
to push the stop button. Yeah, dude. It's like
At what point are you not having any personal life? You're just paying people are just like hey here's 75 bucks
Give me just a second of your time. We have so many friends to do it. I know do we who's our friends?
Who's our bring up cameos of friends of ours? Oh, dude, y'all nice
Yeah, live in large on their dress like a lady. Yeah
I know we brought this topic of course, but there's more but by the way, but this is like finding porn
But this is like finding this is like the same moral if Nate's on here. I will fucking do wait pause
I gotta see if anybody I know so far Colin
mockery I've seen in things yeah
Who's lying? I'm John doesn't blow my mind. Yeah Kevin McDonald's from kids in the hall keep going down
Yeah, these are fine. We're up talking about stand. All right David Keckner. That's sort of saddy
Already that's a bummer. David where?
Arty, oh Jesus Christ get it.
That's the picture he chose to have up there.
Well don't be blown away when this is what you see.
Cedric the entertainer, Cedric how much money?
Doug Benson will do it.
Cedric come on.
Ced, damn man it's so weird.
250.
Fortune themes, oh yeah I got to go see their prices too.
100, Michael. By the way last time we did this it was all like 50
75 dollars and now to the pandemic like you want to watch me jerk it
You want to watch me jagged on watch me slap it around a little bit Steve rain is easy
Macayle to hundo he's got to make back that fucking 9-11 lie money. He lost everything in that, you know
Good at what with Pablo Francisco.
Oh, he does a lot of impressions.
Pablo Francisco is just a price of meth locally.
He goes, I can get out of this.
$59, dude.
He goes, you see.
He literally was low.
I was kidding.
All of his cameos were him going,
you think I can't get out of this?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay, I can get out of this.
You're going hands with all.
You're going good hands with all, Steve.
Get out.
Get to the chopper.
Get to the, I don't know if you think I can go. This is this is this came you suck. What's that sir his cameos are just disturbing
We're like this kind of bums me out man. He's gonna get help damn George went look how weird he looks
Norm looks like the old man from 25 in 125 dollars
He will take time out of his day to say hello to you for what for for a for a sitcom that no one under
25 really knows existed That's not the price of dinner that's not the price of dinner for him and his chick
No, it's like it's so weird you go say you want me to pay for the stick dinner hold on real quick
Eric it's me no
No
No, he's got a yellow he's got a yellow yellow's character's name because there's no end to yellow.
Like a Michaelian Black selling out hard, 85 smackers,
not even a yard.
You guys wouldn't even, I mean,
it does seem like a pretty easy way to make a buck.
Can I tell you why?
Gushin' because I'm the top loud door to my show
on a cruise ship, Michaelian Black.
I wouldn't be able to pop my dick out of my body
after I recorded the first one.
I feel like an asshole.
And I did a free, I did a commercial for a fat head
for a mammoth head wear.
That was easier,
because this is what it is you're talking to fans
that paid you money.
Jay and I have talked about this.
It's the fact that they gave you money
to be like, be my friend, it's the toy.
It's so weird.
They're like, you here, you're my friend now
and you have to be like, what's up bro?
I hope your day is fucking,
and then like, imagine if I was shoe-horning
in bonfire phrases,
do I'm like crackle crackle?
Oh, but I'm like, what is?
I'm like, what is wrong with you?
It's like, I'm like, dickling my body, dude.
I'm bleeding, I'm fucking bleeding.
If I was a kid, if somebody like got me a cameo
of like my favorite actress or singer saying happy birthday
Like I might really like that sure and then you know grow to disrespect them. Yeah, here's what it
Yes, because you find out somebody paid them 65 bucks to do it as bizarre, but here's the thing
also it's
For me I'm not pretending on the one out of every 20 or so that I catch and I'm smoking a cigarette outside
And I'm like, you know, hey dickhead,
your girlfriend said it's your birthday.
So congratulations.
She got your tickets to come.
You guys are coming to see me and wherever, you know what I mean?
Like I just do it because I'm like, yeah, I'll fucking this.
That's fine.
So that's much more I like doing that, especially it one of ones where they go.
I know I see you're not on Cameo, but could you tell me how much you would cost to do it?
I'm like, please don't figure out how to send me money to say hi to your boyfriend. It's weird.
I've been at shows before and after the shows people have been like, dude, can you do my answering machine as macho man Randy Savage?
And there's like maybe four of us around. We've smoked a joint. Not there. I'm like, give me your phone.
But I'll put in your voice voice my most. That's fun. They will do that for anyone who asked I won't oh
No, he won't but Jay will
Starting this weekend. Stand in line dude. I'll stand in line free cameos free
If you go to Jay show that ticket buys you a cameo from Jay
One cameo for for ticket. You got a party a that's a cameos display. We're not
a true
Dancing might be
The next page because when we see a friend I want to look in at their cameos. That's what it is
But I also want to clarify if this is a comic that needs money
I can look the other way
But if it's someone I know okay, I won't name the comics
Who there's one that already came up that I already know
that I didn't want to bring up because I know he's not doing great.
He's not doing terrible, but he's not doing great.
So there's people where I'm like,
all right, whatever, you're hoeing.
What was it, my name's black?
No.
If you got a hoe for a little bit of money.
Vick the potato.
Dude, that guy feels arena is down.
Vick the bubble debt, he's 65 bucks for a cat, yeah.
He watched me bomb at the old stand harder.
I took two bombs specifically at the old stand
that I remember.
Number one, Victor Baudetto.
Victor Baudetto?
Watching me take it first on an eight o'clock show.
Really?
I mean.
80s young kids, they don't know.
Time for me to go up there.
Do some spaghetti stuff.
He's the way he looked to me after he was like,
my God, that last guy was a man to go with his side a couple of
old.
Why didn't you talk about how things used to be?
And yeah, that was cool.
All right, let's see who's on your Tom Arnold.
You know, Dr. Glow Comfin.
Well, Tom Arnold's going to have it.
Yeah, to care.
He's got a lot of stuff to do.
Look at that.
The guy who played the rapper
from it's always sunny in Philadelphia,
the white rapper.
Oh yeah, fuck.
Okay.
I mean.
Joe Gatto.
Oh, he knows he's off the show, dude.
Uh, let's see.
Papa Ba.
Roastmaster.
Jeff Ross.
325 bucks.
Price himself up.
He does like a well shot only fans.
Come on, we're gonna find a friend here
and we're gonna watch their cameos.
This really is,
Jeremy Piven.
This really doesn't blow my mind.
This really does feel like comedians.
One of the comedians was the bad guy
from Karate Kid Part Three.
Wait, Mike Barnes.
Brad Williams.
Brad Williams.
He should charge more. Yeah. He's got novelty behind him get your price up
Dude you're gonna go 40 bucks damn Judy Christ Almighty
I would frame your cameo photo if you did that with the price in your name
No, or God damn it. God. What do you do him?
God the fuck are you doing? God damn it. God damn it. What do you do him? God fucker you doing? God damn it
And next time then I need to know what where money is being drained to
You need to pull me aside and be like this dark thing happening. I go, oh fuck. Okay. We'll do a cameo
With a zany picture of co-cadaxion
Look at a zany picture taking a little whack off an old strawberry fret. He's like it's pills and it's a lot of pills
I bet people ask him to do chip a lot. Yeah, I you should be Bobby Collins cost a dollar more
That's so funny
Yeah, you got to go on the website to see who's charging what because him under Bobby Collins for a dollar less
It's pretty hilarious go down keep going
Oh, we're coming. There's friends coming.
Yeah, you can feel it.
Jackie the joke when he says Bobby.
Bobby, Bobby, Bobby.
Bobby, Bobby, Bobby came.
Yo, it's right there.
Bobby and Nick.
Bobby and the follow.
Oh, yeah.
Play them both.
Bobby, come on.
More than 50 bucks.
That's what that's.
No, that's his cell.
Me, Cupid.
How you doing?
Yo, shut the fuck up. We have to call Bobby. Yo
Bob yo call Bobby what can you can you text Bobby that we're gonna call him?
I'm sorry. I'm asking you two things at once, but this is that is he's the answer for this he needs answer this immediately
Wow feel comfortable talking on the radio about Bobby Kelly dressed as fucking
For 50 bucks I can just spit in your ass hole for 50 bucks
Tell Bobby we want to ask him ask Bobby tell me we want to call him and ask him all the things we could do to him for 50
Oh, I'd rather I'd rather list the things I'd rather watch him do. Yeah, can I spit in your asshole?
I would rather watch I'd rather watch you cry I'd rather watch you cry
And then how much I think in the leg with a hammer yeah
What do you let me do let me do to you? Let me do stuff to you
Do what the hey dress up a good asshole call my mom. Yeah put on lipstick right now
Yeah, put on lipstick right now
Crazy 50 box what happened when Patrice died man, I don't know everybody where everybody splintered You know when think people could take governors off of golf carts
Yeah, I think Patrice was the governor. She was the governor. Should we play this? Yes, if we find porn we play it
Should we play this? Yes, if we find porn we play it
You bitch I want I want Bobby's wife to come in with a chair like WWE
No, they should do is they should pan over and see Max staring at him disappointed like he came into the room by accident
Holding a picture of Lucy. Yeah, yeah, he goes.'s why can he be my real good hey dad I was what oh
what's hey dad I can't figure out this puzzle oh no oh my god dude what the fuck
oh and we might tweet this out no no no we thought the Bobby first by the way you can just find it
We don't have to treat it out. Yeah, if you're listening to more key strokes. You'll find you yourself
Robert Kelly. It's right there. I think everyone from now on just
$50.50 only and that you will only have him do it in Atoga dresses cupid dresses
Cupid by the way out of season especially I
Want December I want December cupids. I don't want February cupids of January's
I want to random June cupid if he tells me this is how he just
Born out right just bought outright to BMW's for him and his wife. Okay, that's not what happened to me
This that have vanity plates his and hers
Because if that's not the case, and I don't think it is. Bobby, there better be a fucking big bow on a car outside for Don because of these.
He's going to pretend he's asleep.
Here's what I'm not answering, but all I said was can you call him to bonfire right now?
I didn't tell him what you guys are saying.
Yeah, of course, because he knows a trap.
He knows his mega important.
Here's the thing about Bobby, because I know Bobby, we both know Bobby very well.
He's going to be like, just'm just fucking family fucking income. Sorry, I'm not I'm fucking trillions of Legion you fucking whatever
I
Just want him to charge more
Yeah, I don't mind you're living the life but live the life for some more
I do I don't want my friend Bobby dresses up like a god damn thing for cameos for 50 bucks
You better hike up the skirt at the end of the
$50 bucks dude. I want to just send him I said Jason it's mega important. I kind of just want to send him a picture of my screen right now.
Yeah, yes.
Do that.
Jason's making it important and then a picture of him dressed like that.
By the way if he's driving he just goes
Oh, that's one of the things he goes what is this about?
This guy's gonna bust my balls, huh?
Oh, no, it's worse than I thought
Oh shit dude
Oh shit dude, oh no, it's worse than I thought
Oh, it's f**k dude, we gotta, oh no
This is level four, he's gonna, he's gonna, he's gonna, hey don, we're at DEF CONFOR
They found the cupid video
He's answering Maybe we, let's put a pin in this Defcon for they found the cupid video
Maybe we let's put a pin in this put this one open put it
We have to watch it. I know what you know what we're dealing on man I don't know this is like watching your dad and drag by the way on the internet is uncomfortable
This is funny. I'm genuine. I genuinely I think we both feel this way
I think we genuinely look at Robert Kelly's an older brother. Yeah
Oh, yeah, like he has a very older brother feeling with us where does scare us but also we love him very much
This is very immense immense respect immense I
Call him for life stuff. Mm-hmm. No, he's exactly me and J down and yelled at us when nobody else would
Mm-hmm. No, he's he's Sack from the NJ down and yelled at us when nobody else would. Yeah, he is
A mention every sense of the word a phenomenal human being
This needs to be answered for
Yeah, yeah, that said Christine, please. I just found a role
I just found a role in Nylon's and dad soccer
I'm like my dad when my dad had trained
I'm just gonna say, my dad had trained for me.
There's some questions that need to be sucked out. Pop, tell me something over three pack.
We got the Valentine's Day.
You know that all the lady bugs
and all the people in the jerk off party love you
and you're the best.
And if it wasn't for you,
the thing wouldn't be going on as long as it is, okay?
He's also giving cryptic messages. Well, they have to because they that's how they tip off to the people that they paid like
Oh see he he knows about our jerk off group. So he had to know that from somebody
That's so weird. Yeah, dude
This is so he's gonna say the things like one bread farve got in trouble remember cuz he was like
He's like all right, so then the all the boys at the clan rally,
wipe out our by, it wasn't that,
but it was like he said a bunch of like racist things.
He didn't know he was saying,
cause he was just reading the script they give him.
I genuinely want to know what is more uncomfortable watching
Bobby do this or if you found video of me setting a camera up
to jerk off.
And you saw me being like, you know like that face.
Let me ask you, is this for money? Are you doing it for money?
But like way less than you think. Like a dirty amount.
I'm just saying, it is money.
Yeah, like 20 bucks.
That.
That's like dirty money.
That's harder. That's harder to deal with than this.
Now if you were doing that for, if I I was doing it for shits and gigs,
I don't know that this is way worse.
If I was doing it just because it's, I think it's,
as I would explain to you, I think it's hot.
Yeah, you think it's fucking, you think it's steaming hot actual.
I would describe it as hot.
Yeah, you're doing a lot of hot digital action.
I do hot action
Don't check out my chat you manipulate yourself for man on the internet I that's okay. I want daddy's to tell me what to do. That's right, but no money just just kids love it again
That's your love that you said pure love that doesn't bother me
one eightieth as much as Bobby taking 50 dollars to dress like this
And him go like this Don, where are my wings?
Where the wings Don?
Of course the fucking red the red ones. It's fucking idiot. Does Don know he looks like Bob and Eka
Yeah, they're multiple cupid ones. Yeah, dude. I think this is I think you hit a fucking gold vein
Should we move to a different person? Yeah, cuz Bobby we need on the phone for this. Yeah, because there's 11 of them
Talking to talking to Jacob in the break about cameo and it really I think he's in
I think you can do it. I think there's a chance Jacob starts a cameo you
should do it for $75 a video seeing dollar signs now yeah but don't let that dollar still your
heart dude I'm already feeling the the shame after you want to price people out yeah make it
affordable you want to be buyer friendly you have to understand Pandemic took a lot of money away from people now. I know you're thinking chisel to Donis is only $30
But I don't know who that is did on the break we called Bobby Kelly who picked up the phone
Turns out he's doing an episode with Ari of his cigar podcast to two comics to car looks to cigars and
I said the Bobby I said did you have you looked at your phone and he's like no like that. He goes why goes oh look right now
And then he just went oh no
Oh god, oh no, oh god, we sort of laughing. Oh, he's thank god. Ari's there too
Oh, no, oh god, we started laughing. Oh, you think God already's there too
Bobby, have you looked at your phone?
Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait We're at commercial break right now, but Bobby, have you looked at your phone? I have not. I will look at it right now. Please. Please. Oh, no. Oh, no. What's on your phone? Oh, no
Bobby, we you have to call into the bonfire
Bobby Kelly is in calling momentarily with a hurry. believe. Yeah, this is the bonfire by the way. Series XM Fax, talk one of three. I'm Dan Soder.
That's big J.O. Chris in full crew in studio.
And one of our crew members, maybe multiple of our
crew members might be on cameo.
DJ, though, I think you would do good too.
Smoking with smoking your eye.
I don't mean to insult, but Black Lou would do the least
good because he's the least ridiculous.
Yeah, if you just wanted a nice family balance.
Yeah, just a good answer by the guys all around just generally happy and up
eat going pretty good.
A good dude with a nice life.
We got a cameo for you.
If you want to Jacob, the mascot of the bonfire or Lou,
the resident just backbone, but he is the, he's the callous hands.
You catch Lou at the right time.
Who's going to give you his phone number on his camio
and his column.
Let's just hang out.
What are we doing here?
What are we doing?
Get ready for a fucking, he goes,
he goes, do this is crazy.
First time I've ever had a camio drop box to me.
Higher me, it's 35 minutes.
35 minutes.
Hey, higher me and I'll do whatever.
Hey.
I actually sent Jacob drops to campers many times before. so they always want to hear him do those. Yeah famous drops. I mean do I
Jacob I
I'm sorry for those so I appreciate if you wouldn't do that
Jacob I mean this sincerely there is a good chance that you would be the highest earner in this room on camo
I would chance I don't know I don't know what the market's like but I will say that I would have to go for gin or in costumes in order to keep up with Jacob. Oh, yeah, yes, you would have to.
You have to be a danger field suit with a white wig. I can't wait just put you on
cami as all of your characters. No, come on. Come on, Dan.
Okay, you wake up every morning and put on your stupid costumes.
I go. I go. You got to look your girlfriend in the face morning and put on your stupid costumes. I go, I go, you gotta look your girlfriend in the face
while you put on a danger field wig and a mirror.
I go, Katie, I would walk, myrtle.
I got 14 macho man, I got five laser fields.
I got two, what are you the booze?
I got a couple, some of the one in the booze are weird.
And honestly, I'm asking dad, I'm asking dad.
African dad, African dad father.
Someone said that to me, they're like, you know, do you do a
person of your dad father is an African man? I do.
That's the way I look at it.
You did that. Yeah.
I missed you, son.
I wish I was still alive to hurt you at
commercial. I have the things you have done.
75 bucks.
Unfortunately, I drank myself to death in 1997
75 dollars
Bank right there
He's dead. Oh my god. You've just honored me again. 25 bucks
Already 150 we're already sitting there one more of those we're all sitting to plan a format together
I could have some fucking Brazilian steak. Oh my god, I managed your camera.
And then I'm leaving it on green.
Drop more meat.
Drop more meat.
Chris, we should've been Brazilian steakhouse
in the way home tonight.
You guys should get meat sweats, you fat sluts.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
No bread though.
I'm trying to sell it.
I've been packing it all.
I'm gonna try it, but you're not succeeding at eating just salads.
I'm getting fatter for skankfest. Everyone'm getting shaped. I'm hiding it under a beard
and I'm getting big. I'm swollen up. I'm not even in a good way enough. I'm just letting
all the seams out, dude. I'm gonna eat so many carbs there because that's gonna be my
whole... Well, you know what? We'll go out to dinner after you know what dude on that Friday I'm looking forward to it because I think you
know what dude's my last thing on Friday right I think schedule keeper I'm sure
I have seven come on Bobby come on dude we got him why well you don't have a kind of tech here? Bob oh.
Hey, what's going on? I love Bobby.
Can I tell you right now?
We love you so much that this is an intervention.
Bob, Bobby, I understand.
I understand that you have a fucking tiny house in some.
You know, if you say listen eight times before you start a sentence,
you're still trying to think of what your excuse could possibly be.
Listen, listen, first of all, listen to me, first of all, listen.
Bobby, listen, you're Bobby, listen.
You have to sleep surgery.
Okay, but Bobby.
I'm a different person.
Bobby, hold on a second. Now I'm just going gonna break things down for you and I'm glad I can hear Ari Shifir in the background.
Because we need to fully confirm Jew and not like a J-Jew, like a real Jew.
They really confirm this.
Ari, just to catch you up, Ari, bonfire context we uh... went on cameo
to be like
let's see who which one of our friends are on cameo
page
page number one page one
we went on so we went to thirty nine other pages
and found very few people we blew our load to fast because we found bobby first
but we've really have found that this is like finding your friends only fans yeah this is
you'll go on there they just let anybody have it yes yes but arey here's the thing bobby does a good job
bobby puts in effort effort costuming he costumes he dressed up as cute
he dressed up as cute as well I gotta get a job I gotta get a job credit on the costume
she made costume okay you within your
wife is aware that you've done this
now
well rob
robbera rather find out that you and don't go to eyes wide shuttard ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'm not gonna hit God tonight when I get out. Bobby, we're looking at one of them. We're max walks into the picture.
What are you doing?
Bobby, here's the problem.
And here's the whole reason we wanted you to call in.
Robert, listen to us.
We have already said you are a de facto older brother
to both Jay and I.
We love you.
We have the utmost respect for you.
The fact that you charge thirty what how much fifty fifty
dollars fifty dollars bobby you are worth a hundred dollars what are you doing
okay this is a problem with having a wife because I was first of all you know
you should do something for like Valentine's Day I can make you an outfit and
you know you could do a lot of people would and then then then then so you can go and I have
this would have you moved out to the wall you moved out to the woods and she had
full control over you dude yeah yeah yeah he's the one who said he said make it
50 white don't try so much you you know make it affordable for your fans and
they'll have you do stuff
I was like I wanted to do 500 because that will be the only people that do it other ones that really want me to yes
Bobby I'm gonna break your heart right now Aaron Berg charges a hundred and fifty
Three times as much as you
you. Yeah, dude. Bungie.
What?
What? You know, hey, happy birthday, you fucking...
Yes.
Oh, happy birthday.
Birthday time.
Ah, you.
Yeah, you heard your having an insurrection.
Bobby, I swear to God, if you need to put your price up to $150.
$1,000. Bobby, $1,000. There you go. Where am I worth $1,000? If you need to put your price up to a hundred and fifty dollars
There you go. Where am I worth a thousand?
Bobby you put on a goddamn dress and wings. Yeah, you Want to help you? Yeah, no, no, no, mean $30 is just it's a it's a $50 is a crime
You should be a hundred dollars at least
But what if I'm in an outfit should I be more for a yes? Yes, oh Bobby. Yes, so much more
200 200 for an outfit. Also, how do you I'm confused it? How you request the costume because I didn't see it in
To sign up for a camera. Yeah, so the gigs up we were to buy a cameo and have you give a pep talk to the
13 hijackers of 9-11 in a full cupid gear.
I love that.
I'm the one who saves all meat.
Dude, I know you got a lot of problems.
You're scared of the cockpit, dude, but you take that thing. You can do it.
Yeah, your government buildings
are easy to spot from the sky.
You're against the odds,
you only have box cutters.
You're 70 versions of Wheton did.
And...
Bobbi, when you go to your cameo page,
it's three videos of you wearing a toga
Honestly, I want to find a VHS of my father sucking cock to erase this memory of seeing
Wakey going once not even have the wings once just a toga
Lazy
My wings fell off
For 50 bucks Bobby I I
Fogged up dance
Bobby I'm telling you right now this episode right now is really gonna juice your cameo So go change it to 150. Yeah, this is gonna juice your cameo
Those are your whitest sheet
Bump up the 150 get ready for the money to go down to get the sewing machine ready
That's what Aaron Berg does though. He grabs his whitest sheet. Yeah
Bobby, I know the holiday seasons are upon us. I'd say think about maybe dawn throwing together a turkey outfit for you No, my god. Everyone loves a skinny turkey
You're the skinny turkey and Bobby I've seen pictures, but you look No, my God. Everyone loves a skinny turkey. You're the skinny turkey. And Bobby,
I've seen pictures, but you look fantastic, buddy. You do. I mean, thank you, brother. That's
why it's fucking so cool to see, man. Hell yeah. And to make you feel better about this, we did
find Jim. Jim Norton does a really funny thing. Do Jim's got every character, every character
as its own price and own amount and their own intro video. So if you could the next time you talk to your friend James,
have him pull us aside to let us know whatever dark hole that money's going into.
So we can excuse it.
We have actually Jim and Sam's new intern is here and he's thinking about
quitting after what he's seen.
We got to put him on suicide watch for 24 hours.
Oh, the big black dude.
Yeah.
I said, uh, what's your name called Patrice died and Jim
Norton splintered into 15 different characters
I'm dealt with it. I'm so in bad. I don't know I'm literally speeches right now. I'm really fucked up about this and I'm
seriously angry at dawn. It's fucking talking me down the horse hit land. Bobby and make
it for children. Bobby, I'm telling you right now. Seriously, go with the first thing you
need to do is go home to cameo and change your price to over $125 because I guarantee
you're going to get requests from this.
Sure, it might be to paint yourself
like the thing from Fantastic Four.
Bobby, I know you're feeling a little bit down,
but here, maybe this will cheer you up.
Hey Melissa, hey, Fufit, how you doing?
I hope you have a happy Valentine's day.
You know, like all the ladybugs
and all the people in the jerks.
Oh, the inside of jokes
If it wasn't for you
You are so even though you make me
Your father bear a jerk off on ease. Oh
No, I'm not you to read that and go it's mama bear mama bear
I promise everybody I'll memorize them so I'm not reading yeah, my god Bobby
Crying
I'm crying
Nothing apologize for you have zero to apologize for there's no way there's not gonna be at least a little dust up in your house tonight though Oh god, I failed you I feel you
I mean you gave us a really easy episode of the bonfire. Oh
Oh my gosh.
I'm like, I'm like, stomach, dude.
It's going really bad.
Bobby, we love you.
But Bobby, go on, Camille.
Can you raise that price immediately?
I'm telling you this comes up first thing.
I don't know how to change it.
Yeah, just talk to Don, get your passwords, get it up.
Because I'm telling you right now, Bobby, if you re-
if you re- listen to us discover you on cameo you will hear we just know your worth so
much more so much more fifty dollars you're putting on costumes christis
definitely does cameos from fucking restaurants yeah from a mission
and the last round he doesn't give a shit you're putting on costumes Chris is
finishing his amuse bush and giving his mission statement
but uh... question from question for bobby it doesn't even say where to request
the costum said does he just wear it
naturally
as he explained he only did it during valentine's day
all right
i'm seasonal like
uh...
all bobby oh my god i tell you right now if you change your price
You're you're about to make enough money to buy a place in Aruba or you can get real wings that don't fall off
Oh my god, we love you so much robber Kelly
Dustin
Dust off the best dust off the cupid off of Bobby and by the way you're dropping all that weight buddy
You're gonna be looking nice in it. Yeah, you're going to be looking sexy as fuck. In fact, the second
you get home when you park and you walk into your house, I want you to look at Don and
go get the band back together. We're about to get some requests. Clear your mornings. We're
about to be pretty busy. Go get that sewing machine, you beautiful bitch. We're about to make
money. Oh, Bobby, we love you.
Please come on the show soon with us.
I love you guys.
Thank you for saving me.
It's okay. We just wanted you to know.
We'll see you at Skankfest.
We'll see it Skankfest, buddy.
Bye, guys. Love you.
Love you.
I'm telling you, he's the best.
He's the best of all time.
The hangar is the harp is awesome.
Yeah.
I mean, Bobby, you know, hang your harp.
He's holding a hanger as a harp, like it's a harp.
Oh, I see the flowers.
I didn't see the harp.
It's in one of the later videos.
It's the one where you can go.
Oh, is this later stuff?
It's when you win electric.
Yeah, dude.
Oh, my God. yeah
Yeah, dude, oh my god of crying that was rules dude Bobby I think Bobby takes it so embarrassed yeah, he had no answer he goes I'm
That's why each guy listen listen
Dead listen listen to me. Okay, listen
All right listen now by the way Bobby specials coming out soon on luick.com. Oh, yeah, yeah, really soon very soon
So get ready to go by that
Fuck I mean get a cameo to if you got extra scratch
But go get funny go get Bobby fucking
Right to down floor floor right outside of Tampa outside of Tampa. So I maybe yeah, I worked with Suarez at side
Supporters that we can after yeah, and he said it was killer
Oh, dude, I heard the room was beautiful
I was like a kill box. It's called kill box. Yeah, and Louis directed it
That's fucking it. And so it'll be available at Louisck.com
Make sure you go by that Bobby Kelly's new hour special. He is one of the greats and
One of our favorite people on earth. Jesus Christ, how do they wrap up?
Yeah.
Skankfest coming up, did you excited?
I'm super excited, man.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, man, I'm expection on Saturday.
We got a lot of fun stuff.
We have Friday, of course.
Friday, or Friday, we have a bonfire.
It's gonna be a lot of fun.
Six PM.
A lot of fun.
Six PM bonfire.
We got some fun stuff.
Yeah, it's gonna be amazing.
Dan Soder is on the road before that this week. I am. And Cleveland Ohio. I'm sure being the blade. uh... we got some fun stuff yeah it's gonna be amazing dan sota
is on the road before that this weekend
in cleveland o'hide sharpening the blade
hilarities sharpening the blade for he comes to war
uh... i'm so excited the whole cruise can be out there for skankfest to
it's absolutely amazing but go to dan sota dot com
for tickets and all the tour deities uh... i believe nashville coming up
cleveland this weekend
yeah but i yeah cle's tonight, tomorrow Saturday.
Yeah, and then after Skeng's you have Nashville
but something else.
Charlotte.
Comedy zone, never done it before.
Cool room.
I heard good people, good staff too, man.
That's a really nice place.
Yeah, you never done it before?
No, they're gonna be so stoked for you.
Yeah, I'm very excited.
bonfiremerch.com, at the bonfire.sxm on Twitter
and on Instagram.
We love you guys. I got tickets, or land on my name. He can't the city coming up, bigjacomity.com at the bonfire sxm on Twitter and on Instagram. We love you guys. I got tickets or land
Big Jamie Kansas City coming up big jccomedy.com big jccomedy.com and
Also don't forget Jacob a Todd on cameo. It's common. It might already be up. It's our also Bobby Kelly
Robert Kelly on cameo. Yeah, Robert Kelly now going for a hundred fifty dollars go go spend that cash. We love you guys. Bye
Go, go spend that cash. We love you guys. Bye!
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