The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Bittersweet News
Episode Date: February 22, 2023Dan has an announcement that will change the Bonfire forever. ...
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I'm Dan and I'm Jay and actually we're a radio show that exists on Sirius XM
That's right for full episodes of the bonfire go to SiriusXM.com slash bonfire for a special offer for our stand-up tour dates
Go to dance order.com and big J comedy.com
You my dear cousin and thank you e maria casas, adentro e... e...
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Backed out for those in the world!
Red's live, the pre-game show!
Oh!
Oh!
Hey, welcome to the video, I'm smoking again.
I'm on a rocket, and it strikes me, I'm on a...
Hey, welcome to the video, I'm on a...
W-A-N-B!
And now, the bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Dan Soder. Can we just let the whole song play?
Yeah, the whole song.
Do the whole song.
Is this a...
Is this a two hour rendition?
Yeah.
One minute, and one hour and fifty-seven minutes of just work and man.
For the rockers.
That's like when radio stations get formats flipped,
they just play like A song, or they'll like start playing a song.
Like, why is this just playing?
Just in one minute, it just changes.
Yeah, like at midnight it'll switch and then all of a sudden it's just playing a song and then people are like,
Why does this keep playing?
And then they're like, tomorrow we're a Spanish news station.
I thought I did Mancal one day.
The next day it turned to Christian Rock.
He said, Mancal and Chicago.
Yeah, where's Mancal now?
I'm not trying to deflect.
Yeah, well, I mean.
It's too deep to have a Mancal right now.
Let's go, let's bring up someone else.
Let's talk about someone else.
Ugh.
It's the shitty day.
Welcome to Bond Fire Series XM,
Fact in Talk 103.
I'm Dan Soder, that's Big Joe,
Chris and Full Crew, DJ Lou, Christine,
Jacob and our Black King, the Black Tiger, Louis,
Juh.
Ugh.
So.
This should have been a booze day, guys. I mean, I almost couldn't get it.
So, it was she got it, so was she good booze.
You would have got me to drink.
Can we get booze?
Can we get booze?
Can we get booze delivery with that lip pad?
Yeah.
I don't know if we were able to do it that fast.
Wow.
It was all the campaign.
We're so good at just fucking cutting around and beating around the bush.
And I think we might as well just talk to it and just fucking, you know.
Yeah.
So, on March 1st, March 1st will be my last day on the show.
I'm going to be, I'm going to be, I'm going to be, I'm going to be, I'm going to rip it.
But March 1st is going to be my last day on the bonfire. However, the bonfire will continue with big J and
Bobby Kelly is Robert Kelly Bobby Kelly is gonna jump in which I can't now we got it
I did just rip the bandage
They're gonna dramatic build up. I'm bad at this. I don't know. I just wanted to throw it up
I'm bad at this. I don't know. I just wanted to throw it up. Um,
Climbaxe right away. I just came fast. Yeah.
It's all over my pants.
What if people are listening yet? Yeah. Well, I mean,
they're reminded after every commercial break. If you're back, it's
Dan's announced that he's leaving. He's gonna leave it in a week.
In two weeks. And yeah, we got, uh, well, next week. Yeah.
Next week. We should
announce every commercial.
Coming back, it's bonfire, which I will be leaving. Oh next week. Yeah, next week. We got really should read out every commercial. Yeah, coming back.
It's bonfire, which I will be leaving.
On one commercial break, it'll just be Bobby.
When he come back, he goes, hey, how you doing?
I'm Dan.
Format change.
Dan, I wear wrestling shirts, dude.
I like wrestling, dude.
I love wrestling, dude.
No, to, to, so we'll give you a, you know,
to talk to this, we'll talk it through. Jay and I are still fucking buddies. We're best, you know, to talk to this, uh, we'll talk it through.
Jay and I are still fucking buddies.
We're best, you know, I was one of my favorite people on the surface.
We're best just buddies.
Yeah.
Dude, we're acquaintances.
We're just down.
We're in, we're in each other's phones.
I'm gonna get shot down now.
No, dude, I hear Dan believes I'm a genuine racist.
He doesn't want to be associated with him.
Because of my new religious beliefs, um, I have a guru I've been working with.
Fucking lefty damn.
And new hamps shirt, not even that.
It's so far off the map, you can't even fucking tell.
Now, I think we talked a little bit about it on Thursday
to Terminator timeline.
But it just, it got to about back in May,
came to J and told them that I think when the contract is done, I just feel
like you'd be the right time for me to leave the show and for you to keep going, which
were always new you wanted to do.
I knew you wanted to do that and you knew that I wasn't going to probably stay around
forever, but not in like a shitty way and like a very honest friend way.
Like, they had a whole crew.
The whole crew knew we just never believed it would We were like, every time we had another contract,
like, oh, fans, fans. Yeah.
But I, but Jay, I, Jay and I talk back in May and the crew
knew back last year in May.
And we've been doing the show knowing that this day was coming.
That's why I just wanted to throw it up because we've all known,
we've been dealing with it for like 10 months.
And then I have been the amount of people I told.
Yeah. is for me
it's anything nothing short of a miracle that it didn't get out of that but this out now
I told I told some people and I was like I'm and then I would worry I'd have a lot of anxiety that someone was gonna go and say it I would just tell people secrets and then assume we're gonna keep it
to see you know I was talking about with somebody at the bar at the stand of the night where I was was gonna go and say it. I never worry. I always just tell people secrets, and then assume we're gonna keep it a secret,
even though I keep it a secret.
I was talking about, I was somebody at the bar at the stand
of the night where I was like,
what, why are you talking to her about this?
It was just something that we know,
but somebody that definitely not secret time.
They're me.
Oh no, they're me.
So she's, yeah man, in listen,
I didn't realize how hard this was gonna be until today, which how? Yeah, man, and listen, I didn't realize how hard
this was gonna be until today, which how much I've,
like, I understand this is my decision,
but I'm still very sad about leaving the show,
and also at the same time, I'm sorry for bumming everyone out.
I've finally diarieshied four times today.
Jay showed up today, and I genuinely was like,
man, I feel, when we were going to get pizza
in between shows, I was like, I feel when we were going to get pizza in between shows I was like I feel fucking terrible that
My decisions making all these people feel bad, you know, cuz I've had a lot of
I'll get a miss you buddy. It's not like here's and here's just a fact man
I can't and I told this to Jay on the phone this past weekend. I can't thank a the fans, but also slow down
Yeah, slow down all right, slow down. I'm just saying man. You shut out of a cannon a slow down. Yeah, I know. Slow down. All right. Slow down. I'm just saying man.
You're shut out of a cannon a little bit.
Yeah. No, I know a type, but I mean like,
this is the, we just explain the situation.
Dan told me this back in May.
Yeah.
In May, this is what you wanted to do.
We of course gave time, you know,
before we made that any kind of official,
even in our talks to, you know, think about it. But I know you wanted to. And then when
serious came to us with the knowledge and kind of like, you know, what's this going to
take, what's the thing? And you have, you know, listen, the best way to describe the two
people before why I can never be one angry with you at all. Nothing but love and I guess buddyhood.
I'm gonna get Corey Hamden and Jay's biography.
He set me up dude.
I don't know I didn't want to sound too gay.
We're bud still.
I was gonna call you my brother and I don't need to call you a bunch of gay stuff.
I'm not gonna talk to you when I see you or something.
I'll say hi.
I know but I don't want it. Like you said I'm shot out of the cannon so I'm not gonna talk to you when I see you or something. I'll say hi. I know, but I don't want to, like you said,
I'm shot out of the cannon,
so I'm like watching the wrong steps,
I'm going to be like, I just want to kiss the guy.
I don't want to fucking.
No, you get, listen, from the get go,
we've said this, the best analogy I can give
that I've given to people,
which has also made them kind of be like,
okay, you know what I mean?
I hear that is, I want to be Howard Stern.
You know what I mean?
That's what I think. You are, I mean, that's what I think.
You are, I use the name of Tray and Matt.
Yeah, you want to be Tray and Matt.
You want to write cartoons, you have write scripts,
you want to get things made, television space more.
So like, I'd be a shitty friend.
Yeah, I'd probably just be a downright buddy if I said that.
I do that buddy things you know
When I get the first text back after I leave of JB like hey buddy I'm gonna be like is that what I
Thing when I fuck with crowds. Oh, I think it's your best friend. They always go. He's my buddy. Wow
Okay, I was like damn poor word choice
No, but I know that's what you went down listen
We went years beyond what I think your initial thought was.
You said we thought we were going to do about three.
I thought we probably max out of five is what you always said.
I always thought I was going to.
You thought you would want to be done by five.
I always thought we were going to get fired by three.
I was like, all right, well, they're going to count our five.
They tried to fight me twice and won.
If they did, do you escaped two near deaths?
And then we just went and it was like, in a way,
like I didn't think we knew from two days.
My balancing board is going away, dude.
Yeah.
I'm gonna say something crazy.
Black glue's gonna go to HR about me.
I don't even know what it's about.
Yeah, but there was, you know, at the beginning, it was like, oh yeah, we'll do this like a couple of years.
And we were lucky, man, going on eight years, like close to eight, a little over seven and a half years of doing the show.
And it's always stayed fun. And I think that was part of my thought process was like, I want to leave while this is still great.
While this is still very fun.
She's going Larry King and I'm like now when the show got canceled
what a cancel
who's on the bottom of the show
you remember that's Larry King all about the wrong thing
what are you talking about one time
I didn't get a cancel and all we walked away
but there is like you know I wanted to
we've seen so many radio duos just go down and absolute flames. Yeah, and it was like man
I just love it. It's getting up before I yell the N word and a tourist and time square for I don't need Jay made me taking a picture
I don't need Jay snapping photos
Fuck it making all of us lose our income
Jay, what did you just tweet? Jay? I're talking. I was angry. I don't know.
I blew off the steam.
Blow off those things.
But I, you know, man, this has been so fucking fun.
And I love this show.
And the thing that was the most important to me when I told you back in May was that this
show keeps going.
Because it's a whole crew.
It's just friends hanging out.
And when you said Bobby Kelly, I was like, dude, that's fucking perfect.
Yeah. So as far back as, dude, that's fucking perfect. Yeah.
So as far back as, well, it's also before I knew Bobby was getting weight loss surgery,
I was like, let me throw Bobby's hat in the mix because like, it'll make him feel good.
He's probably going to die before I get to do the gesture.
Little did I know he'd already had stomach surgery.
He's like, and he's getting ready to get in. Then I made the promise to him already. Hey, Jay, I don't want the gesture. Little did I know he'd already had stomachs. Surgery. He's like, and he's getting ready to get fit that I made the
promise to him already. Hey, Jay, I don't want the cash. I want
the annuity. Yeah, I want the yearly annuity.
Did Fenoy was writing the fucking pocket waiting to jump out.
I'm hanging together a fork.
I didn't have to get on and sure shirt going like well, it's finally breaking
all this going on lioncy and Bobby shrinking is like fuck's going on here. No, no,
something's got to be broken. I thought Bobby was going to die before the thing has gone
in reverse. No, I asked Bobby and I say it's one of the first things that made me feel
okay about the exit was very, very concerning and so many friends on the show that I had to consider, like,
what do I do moving forward? Do I go do a solo show?
Yeah.
Do where I have, you know, then serious also they have their ideas
that I rotate guest toast in.
And I didn't want to do that because I think for the fans,
you want to find a consistency.
Yeah. They're going to enjoy it and they're going to get into and what that because I think for the fans, you want to find a consistency.
They're going to enjoy it and they're going to get into it.
And I'll never forget with the Gil, the guy who we did our first
run of these shows with, the Sotershop.
When he took us out for burgers after one of those shows,
he described as, people want radio to be religion.
You know what I mean? So you got to see they're going to be me and like friends like sidekicking or it's going to
be me and like I have to find a partner and my thought about partners on a show, the
people that rang out to me several names obviously came by all the good buddies.
But like Joe DeRosa.
Yeah.
I've such a history with. You guys also have that like, buddy ship in a way that like, you know, we have, there's
elements of our relationship in both of those guys, but with D'Rosa, it's like a real,
you got a real like, smoke and cigarettes on the side of the comedy club shit.
Yeah, me and Joe just go back at me, it was my roommate at 1.2, so it's like, we just
have this great history at a great connection. And to Joe's credit too, I'll say the reason that it was him and Bobby,
Robert Kelly, who I thought were the two people I can do that for for each one their own reasons,
with Joe. And this is I think Joe's got such a good thing with his, like kind of his connection
now in the world like with Sal with Sal. Taste buds is fantastic.
It's a great show.
Joe's hitting the road again.
He's doing a stand-up a bunch.
I don't know if he's stretching that thin.
I think the Sal connection is great for him.
He's got such a huge following Sal.
Joe can go and pull that audience and really draw something from it.
I think it's great.
Also Joe's hilarious on the show because his like particular brand of shittiness is funny
when it's against chocolate chips.
Exactly.
You know, right?
It's a lot when he's talking about salted verse on salted butter.
Yeah, Ukraine, Russia, it's a lot to hear when you're talking about pralines.
It's talking about praelines.
Yeah, shmuckers are,
home.
It's my phone with favorite drops, but yeah, man, I mean,
Joe's like, but so fan, it would have been great for
the Bobby, in my mind was like Bobby one.
I know we respect each other greatly as dudes and comics.
Yeah, you know, I mean, we also have a great chemistry, a good rapport in 20 years of knowing each other. Yeah. And Bobby loves broadcasting. You know,
I mean, he's doing his own thing and stuff he does with Calta. But this is different. Yeah.
It's a different kind of show. And I think Bobby is going to blend in great. I do this to the audience listening,
the show moves on with everybody.
That was Black Lou, Jacob DJ Lou, Christine,
is not going anywhere, Christine is not going anywhere.
What if I just show up in a wig and I'm Christine one day?
Can we do that?
Do you take Christine,
do you take Christine, you're not project with her?
No, but just I like that I'm sitting in
because I miss it so much.
I'm like, Christine, why don't you take a day off?
How do you and Dawkins go to the park?
And then I go, and then I go, and then I go,
and when you want Mexican food tonight,
and I go, and then I go, and then I go,
Christine, you're an idiot, and I'm like,
shut up, Jay.
Don't call me an idiot.
Damn.
I'm not a fucking idiot.
We can't even get Jacob Delay after he is just staring
at him.
He laughed a little, we got him to break a couple of times.
He doesn't love it.
He's not loving it.
But yeah, so Robert Kelly came in and I said,
what I, my, my, you know, statement to the audience
would be, you know, hanging with us, man,
we're gonna keep bringing you a fucking hilarious show.
Yeah.
And we need the audience to take the ride with us, man.
We really do.
We, uh, we've got a got a time here that gave us a contract
to let us come here and establish me and Bobby
doing the show now together, and I'm really excited for it.
I mean, Bobby's fucking hilarious.
He's so good.
He's so good at broadcasting.
And we've had him in here for his people
to speculate a little bit because no, Bobby.
It was semi.
That was on purpose.
Bob said, but it was also semi like, you know, on the nose. Yeah.
People are like, what?
So every Tuesday, Bobby and you go, yeah, yeah, we should tell this contract.
It's absolutely.
I mean, and I will say as like, you know, the amount of guilt that I have,
leaving the show and like feeling bad about leaving the show when you told me, you know, because I had heard some of the ideas and again it wasn't mine. When I told you,
I'm leaving, then it's like it's your show. And you know, do with it. But when you were like,
I think Bobby is going to come in. I was like, dude, that's like my older brother being like,
oh, my older older brother is going to come in. And I was like, I got like, I was outside
your guys' apartment when you told me. And I was like yes Yeah, I love that because it really is well, I hope you know
We told serious
Yeah, they spoke to another you get like serious, you know, they're a business. They got to do their thing and we told big
Joe they're like if we don't figure out, you know
Bobby right away like maybe we should do
The guest toast and they brought up again, or we announced Bobby when Dan is gone,
like officially or the day ends last day,
and I was like, yo, there's gonna be a feening frenzy
if you don't announce something's gonna make people,
at least understand where the show is going.
And pleasantly, like, you know,
a pleasant surprise on bad news,
because they, everybody, and I mean this, 100% of people who I've, you know,
had to break the news and like, yeah, Dan's done March 1st, and they're like, oh, man,
like, no, and I go, it looks like Bobby Kelly's going to come jump in from there, go like,
oh, that's good.
Yeah, like it's good.
Yeah, that's exactly how I thought.
Almost what I was saying, like, they're not even taking back like, that's bad, like,
that is bad news because, oh, but but that's like it's also good. Yeah
Bad but good. Yeah, it's like when you lose a player in sports and then they sign a big free agent and you go like
Okay
Team gonna look a little different
Okay, give you some fun behind the scenes things that are great
When I went you know, I said most comics I've told yeah, I've dealt with them and I was doing a podcast run
Out in LA. Yeah, yeah, yeah to promote the special coming out in April. Yeah, I was to podcast right
Did when I got to Greg Fitz Simmons who I love Greg's ball showing for fits dog radio shout out
He's not radio great radio
He's one of my favorite human beings and a hilarious guy. He's so funny.
He goes, and he comes up and he was like,
yes, but the bonfire and I'm like,
oh, he goes, and we started the show.
He goes, bonfire, I gotta tell you, I've done it.
I listen every day in my car.
He's like, Greg, you're listening.
He's like, I love it so much.
And he goes, and the thing about it, why love it?
He goes, you and Dan are just like an unbeatable team.
Like the way you guys just broadcasts, it's well, I love it. He goes, you and Dan are just like an unbeatable team. Like the way you guys just broadcast is,
it's just, you're amazing.
You guys are really making us, you go as a commons.
I've been broadcasting forever.
And I find it hard to like, when you go,
it's like hard to jump in with you guys
to intimidating because you guys are so good together.
And I was like, yep.
Sure are, bud.
I didn't tell them.
I didn't have the heart to tell them.
And then when I was driving to the next show
called Tom Cruise, you know the phone, I told her that I told her that was both like fucking damn. Yeah. Yeah. I
Thought that I hate him. I thought that things off the table and
Stupid I felt that way it's Kangfest when Jay and I would be walking around and they were like and Jay was doing a bit
Where it's like Jay was making me laugh surprisingly Jay was making me laugh while I felt fucking terrible.
Well, because I was trying to make you laugh because I know the one I made that joke after
very specifically, a guy and his girlfriend came up to us and they'd always do this.
The girl selling out the guy.
So I was like, Hey, this is my boyfriend.
He's too much of a queer to ask you to take a picture.
So we take a picture with him.
And we're like, yeah, of course.
And we were either side of him.
And he was like you guys
You got me through some really bad and he was like he was started bawling
Instead of crying and his girlfriend's even making fun of him for it
He's like I can't cry like a pussy
So so and so sweet and I just said the day and I go
Dan from now on every time somebody does that. I'm gonna be like hey man. I understand he's leaving. He doesn't give a shit
I will never leave you and I was feeling genuinely
terrible about that and then we'd be like bombing into people it's getting
fast and they're like damn this and think so yeah and then Jay wouldn't even say it
out loud though he just like he'd like point to me and give like high breath yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I'm like, I'm sorry. Yeah, well, it's guy we're here, it's all up to him. Man, I didn't want this decision to be a fucking overnight
decision and just be like, all right,
I think I'm done doing the bonfire.
I put a lot of thought into it and it just became a thing
like I said that something I felt like it was the right time
because they're doing two-year contracts.
And I was like, I just think,
my speculation is as you sleep,
Katie, what's present in your ear?
No, yeah.
She was, she was, she was,
she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was,
she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, until you wake up and you go, I think I wanna leave the bonfire.
She was shocked in a way,
she was shocked in a way of like,
I might have always walked in and be like,
I'm gonna bleach my hair and move to my amy.
She was like, what's up?
I was like, I think I'm gonna leave.
She's like, all right, let's talk about it.
You guys are on the verge of a new place too.
Is I'm a new place?
Cut my income down a little bit.
Yeah, my mom did the same thing,
and my grandma doesn't care about me,
but no, she does. She's, she's, she's, she's, my mom did the same thing, and my grandma doesn't care about me, but no, she does.
She's,
she's thinking about the show.
My mom was like, what?
And then my mom did the thing of like,
so how are you gonna make up for it?
My parents are like,
my parents are like,
I was like,
I'm gonna go on the road and she was like,
oh, okay,
because Trish, you know,
this is,
she gets some direct results at this show.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. So she was like, she goes, the washing machines a little on the Fritz stand, you know, she gets some direct results at this show.
Oh yeah, yeah.
So she goes,
she goes,
because the washing machines are a little on the fritz stand,
you go, well,
it may take a few more weeks for that.
She was the only one that was like,
I was like, why am I explaining this to you?
I don't live with you, lady.
Katie was like, yeah.
Well, as long as you got your run in.
Katie was surprised and supportive,
and then, fucking my mom was like,
and then, like, Nate was like, oh, okay. And I told Nate, he was like and then like Nate was like, oh, okay
When I told night he was like all right and then like we talked to Shane was like what for
All my friends had different reactions and it was like a thing that I just you know like I said I was like I think Sick of my shit sick of Jay's stupid face. He a doesn't let me respect my fitness routine
Just true, so I have to leave this to start my Instagram fitness profile. I am not the best
Fitness companion so get ready to follow me at Danny Gaines with
I'm gonna be blasting everything from my quads to my delts and you guys are gonna you guys thought the space hair was bad
I'm gonna get facial surgery. You're not even gonna recognize me
I'm gonna come in here with a fucker. I don't want to make her feel guilty, but without you here for sure. I do.
For sure. For sure we're already here.
I'm guilty. DJ Lewis is gonna die. Why would you say that?
Why would you do that? I can't come back. We were just joking before the show about how I was like,
hey guys, let me back in. Hey guys, the door shot. Can you let me back in?
Can you do that? Can you do that too?
I'm just wondering if you evening him out and telling him to read that book every year
about quitting smoking.
I mean, dude, I'm gonna bother you. You realize what he just put in my head. I'm gonna bother
you. I don't know what's going to happen out you, Dan. I don't do that. That was so real.
Don't you do that? Don't you do that? I don't think he thought about it until I just made
that joke. And then I think that got very real with him. He's like, Dan, his the guy that
is always like, Hey, man, whenever you're ready to knock off the sauce, I just made that joke. And then I think that got very real with him. He's like, it is the guy that is always like,
hey man, whenever you're ready to knock off the sauce,
I'm here for you.
Can I tell you what we just,
I'll never say, I'm just like,
we should booze up on this show.
Every time we have bad feelings, let's booze up.
Can I tell you where I just, what I just saw,
watching Lou go through that,
is the moment that Lou does pass away,
even if it has zero to do with me,
is me coming back to booze because of
Lou listening to ten. Pulled out a bottle of James and be like oh,
Lou was here. He's loving this damn. Don't put your put that evil on me Ricky
Bobby. Yeah, I want to enjoy it. No wait, no, I don't want you to drink even when I'm dead.
Okay, deal. Deal. I don't yeah. about I feel like what if you die because of him?
Oh like because of action. I do it gets Lou killed yeah. I go, Hey, Lou, can you go?
Can you go engineer this new tiger podcast? It's tiger's podcast.
Yeah, don't you wish you could butterfly effect the results of staying or leaving?
Oh, yeah, absolutely. When that be great. 100% yeah. If this is such a gamble,
I could be back at dose in a year.
You don't know.
Always bet on white.
I could be taking lunch shifts in fucking 18 months.
Oh, that will come by on Between Tuesday shows.
That'd be crazy.
Hey guys, you guys still doing the full show on Tuesday?
You got to do the champagne sword open. Are you guys sab doing the full show on Tuesday. You gotta do the champagne sword open
Are you guys sabering the stomp hearing all hey Jacob? I love you're rugged outdoor look
It turns out ad sales went through the roof with Bobby Kelly
I go that's so cool people probably love two dads discussing
We're gonna be as we have some manager to put us at another table
He goes do we tip him good or is that insulting?
Right.
Right, tip and I go, well, I must have gotten a new contract.
I'm going to go roll my silverware.
Oh, all right.
You know, we're going to do my prep.
I'm going to go do, I'm going to do side work.
But you get a slice of lime.
Good scene, you guys.
I guess we have to whoever's working the front desk.
I'm going to do all the free time at first, dude.
I'm going to start building. Yeah, dude. I don't start building.
Yeah, dude, I'm gonna go the Nick Mullen route
and start doing carpeting.
Yeah, I'm gonna start your own living business.
I'm gonna get fucking crazy.
I'm gonna start doing soldering.
I'm gonna start doing like anything I can.
I don't know, man, this is a thing where like I said,
we've been talking about it for so long
that now that it's actually happening
and there's like getting to realize
how much emotion it was to be on this.
Very emotional.
I was co-chattering in the first 15.
So thanks for the fact that you didn't do this before quarantine.
That would have been a nightmare.
I, yeah, I didn't, I don't, uh,
I was quarantined.
It's got me through quarantine.
Yeah.
And there was no thought of it.
But I was meaning like financially and everything.
Oh, we had a, we were going to have a job still.
That was crazy.
And this was, yeah, man, this shows, like,
I mean, it's able to sit back and laugh at broke comedians
who were going through it at the time,
starting only few losers.
Oh, yeah, if we have justified income,
and now it's gone.
Yeah, so my idea today was to let it rip.
Yeah, let the phone lines open up, man.
Fuck. Um, just feel terrible. We don't have to even, we don't even have to take names.
Yeah, we should take names and locations in case you hurt me and then I could find you.
We should even take names. What are the, uh, that's, uh, no screener, no phone screener call.
You're gonna go fucking raw
we go raw dog just shoot them through
if you want to call in the show and uh...
you know
get wish then oh well wishes and say how much are excited for the new bonfire
or if you want to call if you want to call just give me the business
no don't just really let me know how big of an asshole you're not an asshole
don't think that for even a second.
But I'm still going to laugh thinking about Trish.
I'm like, yeah, I don't know.
I just kind of was hoping to bump up to maybe a new forerunner this year.
And Dan's going to sign a partnership deal with Tiger Thick Whiskey.
Yeah, I'm going to the shop.
I'm going to the shop.
The shop.
The whiskey dude.
I'm going to free agent.
I'm going to the shop family. I'm going to bring that up. I'm going to the shop I'm going to the shop list you do I'm going to free agent. I'm going to the shop family
I'm gonna bring that up. I'm gonna legitimize you know as Dan and thick boy studio you do for life
He got like way into it
I'm falling papa. I'm like it. There's full on thick boy
I'm joining all the time. I'm a free agent throw your money at me. You know Dan's gone mad thick boy
I'm a free agent throw your money at me. You know, Dan's going mad, thick boy.
Dude, Dan, his personality completely changed me.
I left a show, I'm like, yeah, what's up?
It's your boy.
I did it again.
Sold out all to me.
I thought it was gonna throw up on the pre-record.
You did a great job.
Yeah, I got through it with my ginger.
How are you feeling now?
I feel fine.
I feel fine.
I said it's such a bittersweet thing.
So you know, consider, I've been lamenting this for months.
I mean, you know, months and months we all have.
And then I also have to keep in mind like, I don't have to.
I am excited about doing the show with Bobby.
I think we're gonna be,
it's gonna be a fucking killer hilarious show.
I have no doubt about that at all.
It's just the change of like are the people gonna be like
Fuck you or fuck Bobby Kelly
I think we're gonna get a I think we're gonna get a mix bag of everybody
I think there's gonna be people that are mad at me. I think there's gonna be people that are sad at me
I think we people are fucking you know are dicks about it
I think there's gonna be a lot of sweet people about it. Yeah, of course
I think it's gonna be people that are all genuinely excited man
I'm telling me anger as I told you outside though
I mean the anger is just genuine disappointment if they wouldn't be angry if they didn't think it was sad
You were going yeah, but they're not gonna call up and boohoo. They're gonna come back. You're a fucking asshole for
Love it for the first calls my mom. I'm being like
Idiot. What do you do? I wanted to redo my kitchen? What are you doing Dan? All my sods dying. I need new sod
You guys what are you gonna go on the road for 58 weeks? There's only
52 here. You fucking bum
I'm like there. God damn bum. There it is. I mean, that's okay. That's good for itself
Do you do want to hit some guy like yourself supposed to do?
Go hey baby. Live off the lady. Hey baby. There's a new PlayStation
I mean I was really hoping that after I blasted my pecs,
I could take a look at it.
I would hate to work 80 hour weeks
while you're at home blasting your body.
Oh, it would be great
as the whole four movies came back and
it's like my just in crazy shape.
Joe Piscopo-Shay. Just, it looks stupid on you all.
I was looking so.
I'm showing this part like the bodybuilders.
Wide, wide necked shirts.
Why necked shirts? I got Jay. What's up, man? What do you do? Are you working your
core? I've been listening to this show. You guys don't talk about enough
core strength. Jacob, my man, did you get that powder? I said, yeah, you're like,
Jay, are you losing weight? Or am I just getting?
Oh, they should put that metal detector back in downstairs because I'm bringing
some guns. Oh my god. Yeah, dude. This is Sierra. metal detector back in downstairs because I'm bringing some gun
Yeah, dude, this is Sierra Katie left me she said I stopped being funny and got too rigid my body became too rigid
That's great. You just start pumping iron living off your ladies though I have the cheeks that are like sunken, but then I have bodybuilder face the McElaney
I swear I was watching old always sunnies last night.
And Rob McElaney, he literally worked his face out
into not being able to deliver funny the same way.
Oh, man.
Like when he was young,
the whole thing was he was kind of like,
kind of chubby and...
No, but he wasn't chubby at all.
He was just like the most average body guy,
but like, he dressed almost kind of cool.
Well, they always say they go back.
They go back kind of way.
And one of the early seasons of the go, Mac, how do you see yourself?
He goes on the sheriff of Patties.
Yeah, yeah.
I like the way he says it's a matter of error.
I'm gonna sheriff.
But in his head, his face wasn't fat or chubby ever.
I mean, he got fat for the show.
But when he was just like normal young and the thing,
he looked like a filly dude,
but now he's got those chisel face
that you're the chisel of.
You can do it.
I don't like that at all.
Come and come back. Yeah, there you go. it. I don't like that at all. Come back.
Yeah, there you go.
I'm like, I'm like, actually, I've been spending my time learning a lot about proteins.
And Dan is chiseled.
I go, hey, can I get Joe's number?
I want to talk to him about some different forms, some press.
Well, I told you when I called, when I called my step-pop on three-way with Justin once, a couple weeks ago,
just to be like, oh, you know what?
Let me get Joe on the horn.
I'll ask him something about this.
Justin was asking about some supple bit or something.
He's been great for my joints or something.
I go, yeah, this is a Joe conversation.
I call Joe, and then I sat there,
both of them were accepting of me sitting silently
on three-way playing candy crush on the YouTube
while they just talked. and I want to go
boop and I went hey guys I got a jump in the shower for my show so he was on the both gel I'm gonna send you that stuff I'm telling you
it's made for dogs it's gonna change your life I'm telling you right now it says the only take you're like you know not around any electricity
I don't know why for humans, it's bad.
Did you bring up the, yeah, McElaney?
It's really, it's like hard to be funny
when you look that like strained face.
It looks like it's got the face of caring too much
to be really hilarious.
Yeah, you gotta have despair on your face.
Yeah, you can't give a shit too much.
Yeah, I mean, that's why I felt stupid about the science wig.
So I was like, I maybe I should've just gone big headed bald. Would have been funnier. But yeah,
look at that. He was younger. When he was younger. Look at those chiseled cheeks. Oh,
listen, he looks fantastic. He just doesn't look funny. You know, I mean, it's like he's
dreamy. Yeah, he's worked the funny out of his face. Do you think that he'll go and
get injections? Have you heard that? Or some filler? He just comes out of out of his face. Do you think that he'll go and get injections? I've heard that.
We're in filler.
He just comes in with chipmunk cheeks.
Well, you know, she did.
Caitlin Olson did a complete face makeover.
Like, she's a different human being, uh,
facially from when she started the show.
Dude, I can't wait to come in.
Just shredded.
I can't wait.
The suck then cheeks.
Hey, Bobby.
Hey, Jay. Are you wearing, you wear t-shirts that are too short? I can't wait The suck then cheeks
Are you wearing you wear t-shirts that are too short? So you know if when you lift your arms and we'll see there's actual like tactile veins in your pelvis a little belly hairs
That's pretty cool. You get that chicken skin because you are tanning
Chicken skin is such a great way to call it chicken skin on my fucking neck
Yeah, but it's no
also like wipe out your thing like yeah, it's always you always have goosebumps bro the lady took us to
Turks and Kekos
Bro, I did a workout on the beach. Wow phone lines lit up. I don't want to see names
Well, I guess it's just first names, huh?
Dan Sodor you could have at least announced the bar far the
Archer and Puber voice to Sausage and look like I'll be going and looks like
when he needs to leave the forest it is I have no other way to describe it
other than Dan Lee Roy Jenkins that announcement it was so every all the
information at once and Bobby's coming in and I was gonna make a whole like
speech about Bobby coming in and my, I was like, I was gonna make a whole like speech about
Bobby coming in and my process of picking him.
Oh, sorry, dude.
This one battery, I think.
God wanting to do it.
I'm bad at radio, dude.
I gotta get out of here.
I'm sorry.
Oh my God.
I was like, I didn't even know what I was saying when I asked
Bobby about his interest in wanting to do it at all.
And he said to me, he's like 2000%.
Yeah.
And I remember that as a quote.
So I was like, that was the first thing to make me go
Oh, maybe there's like a light at the end of the
So yeah, yeah, and and that really was like I feel like as as much as I hope Bobby feels like this show is a great move for him
In his career like he's in my eyes saving the show in many ways and my ass and I can't thank him enough
It's gonna be great. The audience
take a ride with us and our audience is very understanding, right? Let's just check
in with Michael from Washington. Hi. Yo Mike, sound off, dude. Oh, crackle crackle guys.
Crackle crackle buddy. I'm illegally not allowed to say it anymore. Yeah. No, my bad guys.
No, I said I'm not. You you you could say it you should say it
The view of got me through some really low points just be able to sit in the car and laugh out loud
I fucking love you guys. Well, I'm I'm happy for you Dan. I'm sad the biggest thing is I'm gonna miss the voices man
If you could just before you sign off for once and for all if you could give me a biggie small because I can still go back to the tapes and listen to you
Order in cheeseburgers and
Baby
Yeah, man, here's the thing. I've been actually working with Jay for months just Michael. See you know I could do a biggie small
How much a big one was I can't do
Why don't you go fucking macho man or danger for me?
On Legion of Skanks, I'm Biggie Smiles.
So I'll be reprising that role like you step it in and going, actually, if you could
scoot it over to me.
Here's the thing, the description that I think the reason everyone feels so good when they
hear Bobby Kelly stepping in is because the description of our show is like people listen
to it, like it's friends hanging out and Bobby and you guys are
Of course, you know, and I mean you guys aren't buddies, but you guys are you know, we're clear. We're dear dear friends
I really have to throw the announcement and I'm sorry
Listen hey, it was damn hey, everyone leaving the show Bobby Kelly's come in don't worry me and J.R. Buds
Don't worry me and J. Are buds
He those one sweep that was a river cypher just chop the heads off of the home. Sorry. I don't throw up eloquently Oak or something next Wednesday. I'm out of here
This lord that over here at the next week
I get to fucking three more days this bullshit got another four shows you shit and then I'm fucking gone
Dude damn dude of all weekends and I plan to get a dance soda tattoo
Oh fuck you dude. This is gonna be the one
Michael thank you for the call buddy. I hope you stick with me and Bobby
I'll teach Bobby voices to Bobby. You get a whole new thing. He's got a different octave. Oh, yeah
We could do some different ones like horse shack
It's just ones that people don't understand
different ones like Horshack. It's just ones that people don't understand.
It's two old exactly.
So which Jefferson?
Mr. Wilson from the Jefferson?
We can do the whole slate of ABC in the late 70s.
Yeah, he does like the older brother from Mr. Belvedere,
the one that people thought was Marilyn Manson.
Yeah.
He does a good Ricky Schneider when he was at his first dog,
Silver Spoon.
He plays the guy who played the bow dukes cousin.
You can do the whole cast of Hey Dude.
Including Danny.
He does a Danny Cooksy.
That'll knock you dick in the dirt.
He's the winner of God.
He's gonna think you're watching an episode of Salute My Shorts.
Wow.
Let's see who else should we take?
Pick one at random, DJ Lou, this one's on you.
Gary Chicago.
Gary in Chicago.
Is it Dan's Gary?
Uh, on fire, better sweet to hear the news, man.
Uh, yes, yes indeed.
Better sweet to go the way to put it.
Dan, I'm gonna be seeing you in March and I'm gonna give you the fucking business.
Yeah, yeah.
You're gonna block your car and all over your state, dude. Yeah, dude. I'm, yeah, I, you know, I expect business. Yeah All over your state dude. Yeah dude. I'm yeah, I you know, I expect it. Yeah
Thank you Gary. I appreciate that man. Yeah, I think it's gonna be listen Dan
I would I say you on the phone last night, buddy. Fuck you. Why are you doing this? No and everything good in my life?
I know after that when I calm down
No, I'm gonna calm down. Why are you doing
Chai
No, it's fine
I told you man as a go-right TV shows and put me in a man. Yeah, absolutely. Don't worry I'll just take some time off from the bonfire if I have to shoot something I won't quit.
Oh
low blow dude low blow
yeah I'm gonna call you around the night and tell her he goes hey right stuck in there What's your dance doing?
Just gonna be like I wish you were my son
She was like dance doing oh, it's him in that average cock
You just got to his head and made a thing was so big you can make a move like this
Dan big dick me
You know, it's funny. I used to go in a big dick. He would say he didn't and then he came in a big
Trish goes you're telling me I mean I birthed him and let me tell you,
ain't see we can see.
We can see. Um, I am a sense it is a bittersweet is a good word because that is the thing like
I have under I mean, this moment is all this right now, but I said there is a thing where
it's like, it's going to be really fun with Bobby. Like even just, uh, you know, it reminded
me of when me and you first got the show and we thought of
the name and then just like the giddy nature of like the beginning of it, like, oh, these
things.
They just like, who knows what, you know, it's a show.
How many live shows we've done now together.
I also love the, what I'm going to miss the most is going to be sappy emotional, but
it is kind of cool.
We both have our own identity and comedy for sure.
Yeah, for sure with, I mean, I, you know,
other things, even like, skanks and our own standup
and all that stuff.
You know, I think Billy wasn't allowed.
Yeah, I did billions.
I got to do a bunch of stuff.
No, no, no, but I'm not saying that, but it's a,
we, damn it.
I had a good point and then pot and railing.
No, but you were talking about, uh, that we have our own identities with
Kanye, right?
Yeah, this is what I was saying.
Yeah, sappy is that, um, what was cool though was when we were, we also,
one of the identities was like, as a comedy duo in some sort of way.
Yeah, absolutely.
In the sense of like, not only just bon bonfire when we did the comedy central
TV show they had there was in topics. Well have it could be in dance Me neither one of us wanted to do it one of the hardest I've ever laughed was the camera setup of
Tonight at the seller. What was it called? It was called this week this week last week
No, this week at the seller this week at the seller whatever it was called when they were filming
this week at the seller. This week at the seller, whatever it was called,
when they were filming, when they were setting up the camera,
it was sponsored by Bacardi Le Mone,
and they kept bringing, they're like,
we're gonna put Bacardi next to you,
and I go, you know my father, right?
This is till he was dead.
And then Jay and I off camera were doing it,
like I was confronting a serial killer
that killed my family in court.
Well, you took the light of our family,
and you took it away from us,
and we grew up in the
dark because of you and then Jay and I they were taking so long that Jay and I
were making the audio guy laugh by doing heat.
We were doing the thing from here.
Flip side that I'm going.
They can't make it.
They just want to sit at this table.
And they go sit at the table.
We're setting up the camera.
Don't move and they were like, I feel that heat coming around the corner.
I'm gone.
90 seconds. I'm out of there. It's between you.
Some schmo.
That's what it was. Brother, you are going down.
And that we looked over in the audio guys, just dying laughing in the, like,
the producer was getting frustrated with us. She was like, guys, sorry,
you one second, and then we're going to feed you the topics.
And you, and that was the table sitting one.
I'm talking about we went on stage, that was a good thing.
And then several benefit shows and the late great Sarah
Dom's thing they asked to go on together because she loved the
bonfire so much. And like, so getting to do those, I mean,
that's that we can't do them anymore. Just like, but the thing
was just the thought thing of the process of people were like,
we can get Dan and Jay together, that's awesome.
Yeah.
Because of the synonymous nature of doing the show together.
And also, I will miss that because when we did,
like, I remember things where it's like,
if it was on my own, they were like,
hey, you wanna do that?
Was it Ristafuri, the, or,
Caitlin Cook?
And Kelsey Cook.
And then the,
Kelsey Cook's thing, but we did it.
The Marvel kitchen.
Yeah.
Oh, the Marvel kitchen cooking show.
Obsesting that guy.
That guy did not like us at all yet,
made the most delicious wedding soup I've ever had in my life.
Immediately I turned him off when he goes,
we're doing the Punisher,
and we're gonna make something in a compressor
or whatever I go, wait, the things that vigilante's
make street bombs out of him.. I go, wait, the things that vigilantes make street bombs?
And the guy was like, yeah.
Like that, I go, no, two on the nose with Punisher.
It's like, by the end he was doing a lot of like,
and then we just threw the hole in, you know, it's like,
no.
Yeah, I got to have to.
Fuck it, man.
But the thing, and again, man, like, how important it was
for me that we're able to leave,
like I'm able to leave and Bob is able to come in. But most importantly, to me, obviously,
is being able to leave the show on a high note is knowing that we get to do that stuff still.
It's like, you know, then quietly alone, root for it to fail to prove that you were the glue
that hold it off. And then I go, I just listening every day at the radio, being like,
a voice would have gone perfectly there. I think for our next college taking, this is good,
because it's not going to upset you
if it's negative anyways from Canada.
Joe, I'm fire away.
Going to be in Canada this weekend.
This guy might be up there.
I'm spreading the word, eh?
Yeah.
You suck.
Yeah.
I'm going to fucking hose you up.
Oh, crackle boys, it's a sad day.
Yeah.
That eats a bad day.
I'll never leave you a big J. I'll never leave you big jay i'll never leave you
say buddy
then i will be there on Saturday night
alright i'll see you then and i'll
i'm also in the i'm also in the i can't smell club
oh really dude i didn't know your nose blind as well
and those blind and i'm watching a man lover
oh man
i'm gonna have to there's gonna be so many meat.
You're gonna catch me in the next three months
of my standup after shows is gonna be the apology tour
where I'm just like, I'm sorry I left guys.
Sorry, just, buddy.
I just, you know, I just fucking left.
I'm sorry.
I'm fucking placed on hate me.
No, no one's gonna hate me.
You're not one of those pussy comedians
who after the show like sales on a back door and you can't shake the guys and they're
they are all right now usually walk out after if you wait like 15 minutes
I'm usually walking out. I met people this weekend in Nashville
but the first night I didn't bring a jacket with me. Oh yeah. I was gonna be and it was like
twenty so it was also freezing in that that This is just a rule for comedy if you're if you meeting a comic at an early show when there is a late show
The degree of difficulty is much higher because a lot of the times where you would meet people is where the people that are waiting for the next show
We're sitting mm-hmm. So it creates kind of like a chaos for the staff
Yeah, we're just like there and like we're trying to get people sat for the second show
But there if they say they see you there taking they're like, well, I'm gonna go take
pictures.
Saturday and Sunday, I popped out.
They show I always come say what's up.
And sometimes I'll pop in early show before the show.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just be like, oh obviously.
Obviously.
Again, here's the problem.
If you're a club now that goes, you're especially when it's cold out.
Yeah. When it's warm out, I like to go outside and smoke cigarettes because it's warm.
You know, when it's freezing out and they go, you can smoke inside. It's going to be a low chance
of meeting. It was freezing. It's chasing a smoking womb. But man, warm out. I'm
going out there and hang with the crowd all the two. Where the crowd with all the club will
be like, Hey, we got to like clear people out
I've been hanging out and been too high before or to when I was in Nashville in fact Nashville
I was too cold the weather dropped like 40 degrees in a night
And I went out and I was able to hang with campers for a little bit and also what's funny is the club doesn't understand
Sometimes is you want to hang after the show and meet people and the club is like
They're away and they're also like we have paperwork that you that we have to do when you're like oh yeah but I want to hang out
but I've had that I've had them come in there and they go all right it's all clear out there I'm like no no no no
God no well I mean we told everybody get the fuck out of here move on yeah well Joe
I'm glad you're you're rocking with Jay and you know and you're rocking with Dan and You're rocking. You guys could still rock with both of us,
even though I'm not gonna be around.
Jay up in Vancouver.
We need some big day up there.
I'll be up there, buddy.
I promise I'll be getting the Vancouver.
No doubt.
Last time was canceled.
Did I have COVID last time or was, oh no.
Last time I canceled.
No, no, no, I didn't know if I was gonna get,
I couldn't risk getting it up there.
I was just gonna see you.
It was what you were flying back. You got, you canceled Vancouver right after I got it in Winnipeg because you
Stayed there for seven extra days or five extra days, and I was like I can't afford that there's so much I miss if I do that
Yeah, I left left on the fifth day and I was able to call into you guys, but I didn't want a motherfucker
It was I think it was a crazy amount of like low days. It was three or four days after you came home, they changed it. Yeah, it was nuts. It was like a, it was
like such a movie-esque timing of Dan came back from those five quarantine days. They
make you pay for. We pocket. I had to pay for out of my pocket. And then I also had to
get driven to Fargo because to escape, he had to escape Canada. Yeah, so now I'm returning
to Canada for the first time in my escape. So bring it.
Dude, what if they arrest you right at the border?
That'd be sick.
Yeah, until they got lame a god.
And then I'm just in a Canadian prison,
talking about how I left a radio show,
and now I'm in jail.
Let's see, is there a, well,
no women have any feelings about this at all.
Let's, we don't really like the show anyway.
I listen to my boyfriend has a blaring.
Do you want to take a break in on comeback?
Break
Okay, let's take a little fucking break. We'll be right back everyone
Stop and I've been listening to the song a lot
I just we don't have to look at it, but I know how.
I just see, we don't have to look at it, but I see the name Pat and Philly.
It has reminded me of one of the funniest things
Lewis asked me last week on Wednesday.
So we'd never show us and send to ask me,
we had to do skanks eight in the morning.
Right.
Like a pre-record,
because it was just like Lewis's schedule,
just we had to and
That afternoon he calls me and he goes hey, can you please judge the
Rose battle thing. Yeah, that he does now and I was like
I was a spit roast. It's called and I was like dude. It's like it's over
I was an eight. He's like, oh you want to go? Deroza pulled out. Please, please, please do it. And I was like, yeah, okay.
I'll do it. And then I get there. Deroza's there.
Oh, he goes, oh, yeah. I guess you don't have to do it. If you don't want to,
but I'm like, I'm already here. But I was like, it didn't matter.
But when he told me he was like, uh, when I agreed to do it, I go, yeah,
I'll DVR the Sixers game.
And I was going to go and watch Sixers game tonight and chill, but I'll DVR and Pat,
what's his name?
I'm Pat Schroeder.
Very funny.
Came up on stage wearing a Sixers thing.
Yeah.
And I was like, oh, yeah, I always love Pat.
Oh, he's here.
I go bigger, you know, Philly sports all the way.
I was like, go Sixers and he was like, big win tonight.
You know, Philly sports all the way. I was a go-six errors and he was like, big win tonight.
Oh!
Again, so-and-so, it was the last game before all-star break.
Oh!
And you're like, that's cool, man.
Lewis stays ruined.
Sixers games, really.
Yeah, he does a third party sometimes, too.
And he brings it in where you don't even see
the fucking bomb on the guy.
I did not see it.
That's right, that's a sixers way.
You're like the kid with the box bomb
and good morning Vietnam? Yeah.
You're like, I was gonna give my shoe shines here,
oh fuck, you fucking blew it up.
You think it's lucky if you're my legs.
Yeah.
I said, they ain't there.
Mm.
You could put that sexy song back on, though.
Go ahead.
I don't know much.
I don't know how much.
But I love you.
Damn, Linda. Damn. I don't know much. Is this song you and your wife's much
Is this on you and your voice interracial playlist black Lou?
Interracial of playlist blue we have to make a Pandora playlist of intersexy interracial music and this is God I don't do it black and white doets yeah all black and white doets they're. All black and white duets, they're out there.
Yeah.
I don't care if you do O.D.B. and Ryan Carey.
I believe they were fucking.
Dicol!
I will take some of your calls when we come back, everybody.
We're hanging out on Danny's last run at the Bonfire.
Thank you for listening.
Thank you for listening.
That was just a portion, a tiny sliver, a morsel of the entire show. Thank you for listening. Thank you for listening. Thank you for listening.
That was just a portion, a tiny sliver, a morsel of the entire show.
You want the whole thing?
Go to seriousexempt.com slash bonfire for a special offer that is traumatic.
It's so good.
It's going to make your family upset with you.
We're going to lose money over here.
And you can go to bigjcomedy.com and dancoder.com for our standup dates.
lose money over here.
And you can go to bigjcomedy.com and danceorder.com for our standup dates.