The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Daytime Death Metal

Episode Date: June 23, 2023

Bands that try to be scary in the daylight.

Hey everybody, I'm Bobby Kelly. And it's Big J. Okerson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just the podcast. Hey, guess what? For full episodes of the Bond Fire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bond Fire for a special offer. And now the Bond Fire, with Big J. Okerson and Robert Kelly. Let's fuel on today's hottest nonstop rock. And now the bonfire with Big J Elkerson and Robert Kelly.

It's fuel on today's hottest nonstop rock. Bonfire, Faction Talks. SpaceX M103. Big J Elkerson, Robert Kelly coming in at you. With the top 40 of 40 years ago today, got to say what happened with the song, Bobby. Yeah, please. DJ Lou, I suggest this one right away.

How are you? Hi. Good to see you. DJ Lou. Well, this is the Thursday technically How are you? Hi. Good to see you. DJ Lou, well this is the Thursday technically of people, so they've already been once all week. DJ Lou had a moment this weekend where he felt really cool what the song was on. It came out of, I get it. I've been in a car sometimes, but I've got to play that in the studio on Monday.

You had a moment with it. Actually it happened a couple of weeks ago and I've been sitting on that feeling until now. Oh, when was it? What was the moment you felt? First of all, I didn't know what the guy looked like to lead singer. I'm like, oh, gorgeous. Yeah, too much.

Actually, in this video, not so gorgeous, but when he figured out his look by Hamridge, yeah, and he could sing too. God can sing for sure. No, I love that penis. Same guy. Sing too. God can sing for sure. I Love that penis same guy So yeah, my name is Bert Carson. I love that cock Man, I can't get out of my head

That lady's dick and the emeroes is a her weiner just the part where she was getting it to a full capacity. Yeah, she really beat her wank, huh? I mean, it was I didn't realize it hit me. She really slapped her lullaby around for us. When she first took it out, I was like, all right, it's cool. And then she was like, hang on one second. And then she started to want to get it hard. Yeah, you're a big white star.

You're a bright shining star. It did. She didn't hold back at all. Then it was like balancing. It looked like it was balancing on something. It was just like wopping there. I was like, it all became gay. It all became that gay.

It's a 14 slip. It all became guy in that moment when she started beating off. Oh, it was, it was gay. We were all gay last week. When you started beating her dick off, was we were like, all right, bro. Oh, the worst part. When I went home that night max how was work I was like confusing yeah I was I you know thing work you guys what did you do today work

it's not it's not this thing it's boring I don't even read dad's dumb boring work I explored I explored I certainly need to draw a picture of my own face taking the cock of well, I I will tell that's Norton's face That's a good time. I'm changing. I'm changing it up. It's fine. It's Norton. It works. Yeah, it's Norton It works. Although I would probably throw a little shadow on the head though Just a little fun. Get it. Make it's not you I got out. I should shave clean

I mean did you have like this we get any thoughts of like what the hell did I do? to make it's not you. It's not about God, dude, I should shave clean, dude. I'm gonna get a little fuzz. Did you have like this weekend any thoughts of like, what the hell did I do? Oh, well, yeah. Was there any moments where you like, just if no one was there, it would have been okay. No, it's one of those things where you push on other people like what your guilt of it is.

They're not even saying anything. It's, you know, it's like, yeah, she's like, dude, she came in, she was like so hot. I mean, like hot like face, and her tits and everything was like hot. Like to see, no, I wasn't looking under weaner too much. Me neither. I mean a long time, but not like too much.

We have to draw it. I didn't look that much either. I didn't resketch it from memory on Sunday. I certainly didn't try to force myself back asleep to get back into a dream where I was sucking her off. It was a crazy. It was a crazy. Oh no, no, how'd you feel when she was pounding her cock right next to you? That was so weird. She was really darned it out. It was so weird.

It was so baffling. I was so confused. The rest of her was so hot and feminine. Yeah. But then there's this cock she's stroking. Yeah, but when she got it, that was the thing. It was like when she took her clothes off and it was regular size, it was a guy or whatever. When she got it going, I was like, oh, this is definitely a cock. Well, I looked up some picks in some video, and I will say that one hard to find a video of her banging a chick, it seems to be her mostly getting

fucked or fucking adieu'd. And I will say before she got the breast implants, it was a little more in the face. You know what I mean? But those breast implants came in, filling out that dress. I've said to everybody actually this weekend, when I talked about it, I talked about it a lot with people.

You did, I was like, hey, can we go sit down for a little bit? Yeah, before the breast implants, you know what I mean? But she has an hourglass figure also, Jay. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She does. She has a very fun. Oh, you got her bag in a girl? Nice.

Very feminine. Right now we're watching Emma, beautiful Emma Rose with a beautiful blonde girl. I think that's Garfunkel from Garfunkel notes. Hahaha. You're fucking Garfunkel. She was something garfungal. She was so pretty though, even though I said when she walked in, I knew so you could tell to some degree, but very beautiful.

Very beautiful. Kameh'n body looked unreal on the dress. Yeah. Beautiful dress. Right down to the, I mean when her pecker flapped out of that dress, so she pulled her dress down, was up until that moment, I was still in my head for some reason, there was gonna be like, my brain just thought

there was gonna be, I was surprised all over again. Yeah. Even though I knew, is that makes sense at all? Yeah. You pop that and I was like, oh hang on, it doesn't make sense to my body. It's like, one time I walked over like a see through glass floor of like a super high up structure.

And I was like, oh, I'm gonna go look at that. And as I got to the edge of it, my body just stopped. Like my body made a decision. And when I saw that girl, my body made a decision. And it was a girl, even though I knew, and then when I saw the dick, it was like, what? Even though I knew. Yeah.

Very disturbing. Yeah, she fluffed it up quick. Did you get hard a little bit? No. Not then, why'd you? up quick. Did you get hard a little bit? No. Not then. Why'd you? What? Why'd you clear your throat afterwards?

I guess when I lie, I can watch. I watch a lot of interrogation stuff, Bobby. The throat clear is not a good sign. That's me again, that's me again. Did you get hard like, at all? No. No. Okay.

All right. That was definitely a throw clear of nerves. Your throw strike is your lying. Your throw strike is your ad of fluids from beating off to that guy. I have two penises in my head from this week, last week. Yeah. I went to Chicago on Wednesday. You got to see some penis?

To, no, I went, I didn't, I wasn't planning on seeing penis. I went to Chicago on Thursday for Star Vos's movie, which was a lot of fun and then Thursday night I did a pop-up show, but I went to the Russian steam the Russian baths in Chicago You really weren't the finish your gig experience and no, no, no, it's not a it's not great Yeah, look I just got to come in front of some guys and get out of here. No, it is like an old school Russian You know they have a Russian restaurant upstairs and yeah, that's where Jeffrey Dahmer would fucking kill you Yeah, no there it is. Oh my god look at all the white in that pool. Have you ever gone to the one the village? I went in the one of the village. Yeah, it's great

But it really is just like old Russian men and towels drinking vodka. Yep, I love the Russian baths in New York. And I was sleeping in your balls with a man. And these ones, but I was in there, I was in there, I was with two other guys, and but I was in by myself, and there was this, he looked Japanese, but I guess he was from Russia, right? Mm-hmm.

And all of a sudden, I'm sitting there. And oh yeah, one of those husky people. He was like, he was like, like the husky dogs, they look, I said for the Russians that look Asian. Yeah, Russians exactly. So he's sitting there looking at me and he's like, you have to,

and he starts talking to me and he's like, lie back, lie back. And I'm like, huh? And he's like, lie back. And I'm like, okay, and I don't don't I don't have to say no to people Like that's come on sometimes you can have to say no Bobby well, he goes lie back So he's trying to mouth no no no no no no no no little bit of it in mouth. So okay He takes my feet and he goes put your feet up. So I'm I'm in the sauna

I'm in the steamer bring you by you by myself and he picks my feet up and puts them together. And then he takes a towel and he starts like whipping them, not whipping my feet, but like fanning hot air onto the bottom of my feet. And then he's like, okay, put your hands over your eyes. So I'm like, huh? And he's like, put your hands over eyes.

And I, so I'm like, okay, so then I put my hands over my eyes. Before you tell me what it is. I do want to say because, you know, full disclosure what's going on, we had no show Monday because of Juneteenth. This is Thursday show, but recording it too. This is the first time me and Bobby see each other. And we usually try to hold the catch up from the weekend

for the first live show of the week. Sure. But I have a feeling Bobby wants to get something off as Chester he did. So this says, very little dude, he's like, I gotta get this out now. I can wait. Should I wait?

We can't talk about the rest of the week if you did something super gay. So just know that, now we're here now dude. You can't blue ball me now. Your eyes are closed and naked Russian man is fanning your feet. He's not in the cover your eyes. He's not naked, he has not naked. He has a towel. He's naked. He's not okay. So he doesn't work there. Well, it wow. He, he, it winds up that he does work there a hundred

years ago. No, no, no, no, no. So then he makes me put my hands over my heads and he starts fanning my midsection with the towel with hot air. Dude, this is how they get you at the actual massage parlors. And then he goes, come down. He can't speak spoken English. He's like, come down, sit, bend over. And I go, what? And he goes, bend over. Okay. So I don't know how to be like, I don't how to You're I'm either go fuck yourself go fuck him get the fuck away from me or You're all engaging gay sex with you stranger You Chinese Russian I mean they're fuck you or take me on yours. I don't

Fuck you or fuck me. I have two gears. I have one and six. I don't have you know three four five So I'm like okay, and I'm kind of I'm just nervous like I don't want to offend anybody Because are you thinking like oh about to have gays or you're gonna have to eventually shoot down gay sex when he's when he said Bend over and I was bent over you did it and Bitch he did it. I was not a laugh and I like this is gonna be fucked up because I'm gonna have to. This guy's gonna try to stick something in my butt and I'm gonna have to fight him in a steam room like Steven's a gollum, so I'm shit. But then he just started fanning my back with the towel and that's when the other guy came

in that I was with and he was like, you come do. So get away from him, gay, sir, gay. Before you knew it, this other guy came in who I knew he came in. So he's got all three of us bent over and he's fanning our backs. And then these other two guys, we don't know, came in and they were like, whoa. And we look, I was like, no, no, no, come on in. Come on in. And they're like, nah, we're good.

I'm like, no, come in. This is, this is how you supposed to do it. I can take every one of you, dude. Stand up, turn around and bend over. So then he goes, okay, come now, come now, come with me. So I'm like, where are we? So I have to leave this theorem. There's a cold punch.

Like this just bath. It's like a jacuzzi, but it's ice cold. Romantic. So he said, go, go, go, go. So I walked in and it was, it's freezing. He said, go down. And he, I wasn't going down quick enough. Like I'm supposed to go in and it was it's freezing. It's like go down and he I wasn't going down quick enough like I'm supposed to go in and just go under the water. So he started coming in to get me

and he had his towel on so he ripped his towel off and all his other remember is his his his brown Russian balls and penis coming and I my head was like in the water but not under and he I was trying to get out and he was coming in to push me back down. Did you have a barrel? Yeah, yeah, it was a thick long hanger. It was just it was like his His scrotum and his penis were together as one. You know name me like a like a ball dick unit I know what you mean and it was coming right at me and I just went under I Just went up to the water and then what you put it back on and then he stepped back out because that's what he wanted me to do He wanted me to go under so he's gonna face fuck you unless you're under water Wow

Chicago is dangerous it wound up being he worked there. I want to find out what I found out after he worked There's weird to the guy who works there's naked. Well, that's what they do. No, what is I've never I mean It's always when it's co-ed it's bathing suits Not that this was a christie's never been in the cold boys. You just suck through So he he had me do this like three times. Like he brought me back in, put my feet up, made me bend over, put my hands over my eyes. And you were, you were made like,

love to by a man. And then he would throw me in the cold plunge. And then he, then he put me in the shower. He's like, go in the shower. So I ran the shower, but I shut the door. Wash good, get in the shower. He's like, go in the shower. So I ran the shower, but I shut the door. Wash goods, get in the cracks. It was one of the weirdest experiences because I didn't know how to say no.

But I didn't have to... Did you feel like not okay? I'd be not okay after that. I felt, well, I just can't get his thing out of my head. You went to enjoy and relax at a steam bath. Instead, you were in the middle of a thing. I mean, I know at this point, I'm sure you have the thing now as I do too, where you're just like, well, now it's like, where does this go? I got a show to talk

about. You know, 40,000 hours a week on. So let's go. I guess we'll see what happens. But I mean, like also in that moment, you're like, I don't like, I'm like, hey, bud, I'm okay, actually. Well, I tried to say at the beginning, I was like, no, no, no, no, and he's like no, no, no, no You he was going no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no And then he out no no no no no made to where I put my feet up He like grabbed my feet and held them up. Yeah, and I was like oh, this is good. This is this is going nuts right now Yeah, no, if he tried to touch me, of course I would have flipped out.

I wouldn't want to six. With the funniest thing in the world be if we got one of those guys who like oiled themselves up and rub themselves all over your body and for DJ Liu in the studio. Hahaha. Did you have your face while guys cracking your back with his body?

Oh God, I can barely handle that when a woman does it. Yeah, it's gonna be pretty hot. I like the Russian steamer, but you know, being like, everybody was like all the guys are naked in the steamer room. Yeah. Yeah, that was, it's kind of. It's not my jam. Yeah, it's, I mean,

The naked guy hang is not strangely enough, not my thing. I can't get this guy's penis out of my head. I don't wanna be naked. It's not that. If they were like, hey dude, you wanna run it in there real quick and take a look at all the Russian weavers, I'm gonna go take a look. But I don't wanna be naked.

I don't wanna get naked at all. I don't wanna get naked either, because I don't wanna get caught fluffing. Oh yeah, I don't wanna get caught getting it going. Yeah, and then I said I don't like MROs just pounding cocking for a room full of dudes And I was with two guys that got naked like they took their swim trunks off and they got naked with no problem because they got a hang They got a nice hang Aaron put them you know, I'm an Eric. Yes, get Eric two comics. We do a show with that night

But they just went in took this shorts off and I had to do you them to go? I changed like a surfer on the beach. Under the towel. Yeah, under the towel. I pulled it down. Oh, they both had fucking swingers. They had nice ones. Yeah, they had very confident hang. Damn, I wish I had a fucking swinger.

I wanna, I don't even, I like the size of my- I don't care about my hard dicks. I like my penis. I have a great penis. My hard dicks absolutely fine. I just don't like that. I've made peace with that. I don't have the hang. No, man. I don't know about my hard dicks. I like my penis. I have a great penis. My hard dicks absolutely fine. I just don't like that. I make peace with that.

I don't have the hang. I don't know where my hang went. I don't want to get my hang. You take ozampic. I want to take like one ozampic for hang. Doesn't exist. There's got to be something. Although hopefully ozampic, you think that...

Make me believe. It's not so. You have to believe that the summer one of the Result of us and pick will be a little more hang once you not do I lost a lot of weight I still don't have look at your Dixie your Dixie they're a faller or a Retractor my Dixie Retractor to grow or a shower yeah I don't have a shower I have a grower yeah I don't like that I don't have a shower. I have a grower. Yeah, I don't like that. Christine said it to me one day to my face and I hated it. I've held a grudge ever since. What did you say? I said you're a grower, not a shower. Oh my God. The way she says it too,

just like a child. I love a big dick. Whatever, it's whatever. Don't tell me I had thin fingers years ago and it still bothers me. She says you have very thin fingers. I'm like, why are you fingering? No. No. No finger, fingers. I'm like, why are you a fingering? No. No finger, Don. What you're just looking at your fingers in judgment. Let me see. I'm not going to know that old vagina.

Let me see. Well, you got to crack a seal. Yeah. Let me see your fingers. No, hold them up so I can see if there's thin. You do have thin fingers. Fuck you, Jay. What has that been?

You have a little tiny tick that doesn't hang you put wow I'm sorry that's why your mother's a horror I told you I have I have gears one six I just went to six I bought six why are you upset about thin fingers you can play the guitar probably if you wanted to because No, true because I have short fingers I have thin short fingers. I would disagree with let me see him again No, the right yeah, I don't think you have short fingers. I can't I don't guitar. I'm not yeah, you know what I mean But then a thin look look are they thin? I think if nice hands. I don't think this is an insult I'm not sure what you want to have fat stubby fingers. I want a manhand. I like man hands. Oh You know what I mean like I like out you ever see a man hand. I like man hands. Oh, you know what I mean?

Like I like out you obviously a man's hand. Yeah, those J has man hands. God damn it. Nice big man. Yeah, you got a big bit. Look at that. Don't roll up your sleeves with my big bit. Yeah, with your big bit. J has very manly. Yeah, you have man. Yeah, it goes around my Let me see your hands DJ. I'm very similar Bobby. goes around my Let me see your hands DJ Lou I'm very similar Bobby

We get Irish little thin fingers. Yeah, nothing good about him. Yeah, a little trump hands Trump figures they're not necessarily fat, but they're just not I don't think they're fat at all. These could be a woman's hands. Is there any way you can get your fingers thicker? Is there like a device now Has Rogan ever promoted like a? You know, you need some type of. Yes. You want. You want to show your mids? Mr. Rogan, please grant us the answer. He's our, he's my mask you an AI. Rogan, a day, let me see your fingers, Jacob. Let me see those things. That's in. This in. Jacob's got a pretty big hand for his bill. Hold them sideways, Jacob. Damn.

Look at that tail of the tape picture. Yeah, he's got pretty. He's also got a perspective of a computer right now helping him. Christine, show everybody your big huge hands. That's why she thinks I'm a grower because of those fucking monster paws. And so nice and pretty small. She has nice hands. She sure does. That's why she thinks I'm that's why she thinks I'm a grower because of those fucking monster paws She has nice she has nice. Nice. Nice. Nice. Nice. Nice. Nice. She sure does. She has beautiful fingers. Yeah, her tips Yes, she doesn't have a D here

She's not just phone home hands. She got war the world hands She has the hands from total recall turn that steam machine on to get the fucking air back on Mars You've got Quattro hand You've got to turn on the reactor on Mars hand Get to the reactor What a good movie didn't need to be remade with calm for what a flop sucked You know when you were playing fuel earlier, Lou got me thinking, uh, the guy from fuel, what I saw a band open, I think it was for the smashing pumpkins and the word, Manson actually was a zillion years ago, a electric factory called slunt. The girl who was the singer was so hot, uh, at the time, at least, and she married the lead singer

from fuel. But I always remember the name of the band Slunt and I got me thinking what's a what's some of the bestness to call our topic best name bands that are terrible music like best name bands of a terrible band jack off Jill that's a great one but they're terrible circle jerks blow someone's gonna write it and go through the circle jerks rule Someone's gonna write it and go through the full circle, trick or trick or roll. But like slunt is a great slut-kunt. Is that what it is? Yeah.

Slunt. She was smoking hot. Wow. It's older now. I love that when the brown hair girl puts a little streak of white on the little streaks of white. Yeah, you have a Bonnie rate, man. I love that little, Bonnie rate.

I don't like redheads. Yeah. Why not? I don't, I think they're evil. I think they're made from demons. I think their skin is pale and freckling. And it looks like when I don't like redheads. Yeah. Why not? I don't, I think they're evil. I think they're made from demons. I think their skin is pale and freckling. It looks like I can only describe as chewy. I don't know why it bothers me.

Yeah, I don't like seeing the blood pumping to your boobs. I don't know. I don't know how to do all your functions. Yeah, I don't want to see the inner organs. But how pretty is that, chick? Yeah, she's gorgeous. Please look up Abby. Get it nude, please.

See if it ever happened. Um, of the band Slunt. Is this their music? Jesus, she's smoking hot. I stole your money and took your car. I kinda like it. I don't know, I'd say the... I saw them. I did them in a small club. I wouldn't go too see that see them. I saw them.

I did them in a small club. I wouldn't go too steep if they were opening. You'd be like, oh, nice slunt. She's so hot. That's the luck. I want a slunt shirt. I want a slunt shirt. It's great.

Slunt. Oh, yeah. I'll get slunt shirts made. I want some. Let me see some other logos, Christine. Yeah, they're garage band for sure. Some other logos, Christine. Yeah, they're garage band for sure. The butcher babies is a good name for pretty whatever band.

Those girls are also crazy hot. It's a lot of girls come up with good names for bands. And then the bands aren't that great. L7, what a great band, name. What a great logo, but your babies, yeah. We were on cruises with them. They're fun to look at. Bobby, you lost them? No, yeah, I'm looking at the red head.

I like that red head. Red head's not even the hottest one, the dark hair one. That's a fake red head. That's like stripper red head. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that. Like a pink red head. 10 questions with the butcher babies.

Please play that because I think I had a lot of fun information. Is this the, oh, there's the pillow cuba commercial that me and Max are on that we never gave a commission to. I'm almost on them. The spokesperson the pillow cuba commercial that me and Max are on that we never gave a commission to All of a sudden I'm the spokesperson for pillow cuba. Oh stays bomb Bobby Stage bomb Bobby big smiles back there Max. Okay, we're gonna do third take. I don't have all day, bud Don't get him some a chocolate milk now his energy's dying Yeah, Carla Harvey and Heidi Shepherd are the two members of the metal band butcher babies

We saw them before that was when Louis started a mosh pit, I think right? Yeah up into thing. Yeah, they they perform well But I don't know what they're you know musically What do they sell like? Bull shit Shit, I don't think you'll like it or maybe you will maybe you will give me a video of them though So we can see them bother. You know, I like cheesy music though. It's true. You're a GK head. Oh, I love it Bring up a video on here for them So you see it oh What what's that live

That's them yeah That's them. Yeah. Can you see it Bobby? Yeah. I don't know why it's hard to take so seriously It's like fake you know it's fake when the guys do it too. It's weird. So you're goes you guys have been so amazing Yeah, can I say something about metal yeah, it's easy to fake. It's all has to be fake It's all I mean I could be a metal singer. Of course. You don't even it's like, whoo. But this shows you how fake it is because look at them. Yeah. But someone had a genius idea. They said, you know, decorate these hot chicks up. I just haven't go scream nonsense. It'll be a great idea. You get a priest to be the lead singer of a metal band. Father McNamara.

We're just gonna out in a fucking full priest thing. Stop it, no, no, no, the band will come for you! The band ghost does that. Oh really? Yeah. See I came up with great ideas. You really do from 20 years ago. 20 years ago.

You're not that old ghost. No, even around a, I will say. You got to go to the original guy. I mean, it's always the same guy. They're a weird band, if you do a deep dive on them, they keep saying they get a new lead singer. It's just the same guy. It keeps like leaving and changing its thing.

Yeah, there it is. Ghost live rockin' with your 2013. It's so creepy. What does this band tell me about this man ghost there? It's like Norwegian death metal, I guess, and all the guys where these druid masks and the lead singer is always a character. Jesus. They look awesome. I'll tell you when it doesn't look awesome.

And me and Dan went in this heavy with things before, but we saw them with birds tweeting during the day at Rock on the Range and it just doesn't work. It just doesn't work. You need nighttime. Yeah. Evil has to be at nighttime. You can't have it. Is it bottom? Huh? Was it bonnet? Was it rock on the range? It was rock on the range. Yeah. Jim Florentine was like, you got to go see these guys. Then we did it. It was just Burge tweeting during this. It doesn't look right. Everyone, you know he's hot as hell.

You see a ferris wheel in the background? I've seen a band give up commitment to something because of whether the lead singer of Mudvain came out in an ape costume for the first song. His head out, but like a full body ape costume. And he did half a song. And then on the guitar solo with the song, they like, you can see they stretched it out. And he went off stage and came back and he was like, fuck that. And Mudvain's like a real costume band at the time, especially.

I think they're back to that, but they are real costumey band. And so he came out now in a band that's all wearing costumes and now he's just in shorts and a sleeveless t-shirt. He's like, sorry, it's like, I'm going to die. I'll be happy to mudvain for you guys,, but it's gonna be in shorts and t-shirt. Look at this affairs wheel in the background. Yeah, but at nighttime their thing is pretty awesome ghost. It looks like I've never seen them.

Their music makes no sense to me. It's also more bubble gummy than you think it's gonna be. All concerts during the day are kind of weird. You know, you need the lights, you need the lighting. I saw a bodjogi during the day at a fest what What I'm making do it no no not bon I'm not making bon Jovi. I'm making during the day bon Jovi Yeah, they're there there's their closers. Yeah, bon Jovi during the day was not too soft It's too soft, but there's no lights. There's no. Yeah, about saying their music is too, like it's,

their music's too soft for you. They need night time for that reason. Plus, his hair wasn't lit up from behind. Yeah. It was just regular, just a regular chick. Just for your songwriter can go during the day. Cheryl Crowe can go during the day. Cheryl Crowe can go during the day.

Cheryl Crowe can definitely go during the day. Who else can go during the day for sure? You throw a Paul Simon on during the day. Any yacht rock can go on during the day. Who else can go during the day for sure? You throw a Paul Simon on during the day. Any yacht rock can go on during the day. Fleetwood Mac could go on during the, ah, Christopher Cross, I feel like it's for cross could definitely Simon and Garfunkel. Yeah, it's just that Paul Simon for sure definitely go during the day. But I've seen bands like the Sturb during the day and it's sucks. It's good, right? You need the lights. You all the lights

behind you? No, you can't throw evil up in the afternoon. Yeah, kiss can't go during the day You just see how old they are. So it's a fuzzy hair. Me and Christine saw Marilyn Manson like doing the dance and that was that you saw fatty was and blew a snot rock at the stage on his chin on the big screen. She was so grossed out by that. That did bother the hell. on the big screen. I think it's so gross to help by that. That did bother the hell out of you. They bothered the hell out of me.

Play their music so you can see how like not good it is. I mean, there's thousands of people there. People love them. They're very popular. They're logo, they're whole deal is cool. The music's just stinks. So English too, is it English or is there another language? We explained that he looks like a skeleton and a priest self it. He says where's the priest self? He has one eye, his blue, and one eye is black. What happened to Jim Texture? He said he's worse a priest. I have a priest out of it. He has one eye is blue and one eyes black What happened to Jim texture? Yeah, I said everyone's wearing druid masks

I just want to look at a pope. I want everybody to know. Yes. How shitty these guys are But I'm fine with the music and the look. It's just gives me a bad feeling Yeah, but the drummer has to wear a mask too, which must suck for him Oh, the druid mask on the drummer must blow this guy has one of the largest noses I've ever seen on a human being I think it's a prosthetic or something. They're the whole things character shit. It's high concept low interesting music to me They sing English I was gonna say like Ramstein I was gonna say like Ramstein

R.I.E. look like what they are. Ramstein though. I think is I think I actually like them. They're great. Yeah, they're great I'm saying they do like the whole showmanship thing, but they like thrash. Yeah, it makes sense what they do If you saw Ramstein during the day that would blow That's a band that would suck during the day for sure and Kiss yeah, you can't spit blood during the day. Yeah plus pirate techniques suck during the day for sure. And kiss, yeah, you can't spit blood during the day. Yeah, plus pirate techniques sucked during the day. Oh, they really do. Yeah.

But the cradle of filth was the band that I was using example for, that's who I saw, was cradle of filth. And they had all this shit going on and it was just during the day at OSFEST. And I just, I don't filth during the days and most read the whole thing. I always find it here, Bobby will appreciate this.

Stand up during the day sucks too. Oh've been doing everything I've ever had. We always find it here. Bobby, I appreciate this. Stand up during the day sucks too. Oh, easy. Except it's gangfest. Except it's gangfest, and of course, the foil is too old. I just want to say something. Those fucking two o'clock shows you put me on it's gangfest.

We love them. They're fun. They listen. No, they're good. They give a blast. It's just something, let me tell you what it is. It's something about the sun being out. Yeah, the feeling inside of us for sure

Yeah, the inside of me Performing it people during the day. Doesn't feel funny yet. It's just this it has to be dark. I don't know It's just weird in the room. It is dark in the room. The thing about it. No, no, no We did outdoors you had an outdoor stage at Houston. Oh in Houston Yeah, in Houston. Yeah, the Houston day outdoor day thing And I did it at Bonnaroo. I did it at another festival Just to look out and see the sun You know what I want in sunlight a couple times this week. You did was it all right

You was great. All right Listen, you prefer to be on the nighttime part of the show. I was on the virus tour. I was on the first part of the show and it was just sun. Yeah, yeah, it does. It's a little deflating, but also there is something to be said for you can see people. They have great camera people on this tour. So if you talk to the people, Vos was able to do this too. If you talk to people, they'll put them on the screen. So you can like do your thing with the people. be great Yeah, it's pretty awesome. Vosted crowd work at a fucking arena show so did I you did? Yeah, and they put it up on the thing Yeah, isn't it hard though? Cuz you can't hear the people what they say you have to if you're gonna for crowd work

There you go. That's a good answer You know, I feel like you're gonna say did you see vaude did you see vaus is a list of what you didn't see it his rider? He did a list of because someone said somebody Matt Rife was the Oh, it's great. I work his crowd work list and who was number one on the list. What do you think? This guy right here. No, Ridge Vos.

Oh, yeah. And then this guy right here. No, I was first to boss behind him on his list. Were you the first one? I believe so. Yeah, he put Bonnie on the list. Yeah Crab work Bonnie crab work Bonnie. She did great when she did the crab work show like yeah on this is not happening Yeah, and then he did another list. What's your fucking deal? There was another list too

Guess who was first on the second list Peter Bales. Yeah, no boss Well, you put him himself again. It's true. Uh, he put yeah, he had no boss. Well, you put him yourself again. That's true. Uh, he put yeah, he had to. All right, wait a second. Yes, to keep adding to the list because people get mad. Yeah, but who's Nancy Ryan? No, that's my point. He's having to put things on because their friend Nancy Ryan is a person who has riches

number and was hurt by not being on the list. Peter Bales, I don't know who that is. I think he's the guy who taught my daughterale, I don't even know who that is. I think he's the guy who taught my daughter comedy, my daughter's comedy class in Long Island. John Malaney is good at crowd work. John Mulroney. Oh, who the fuck's that?

You don't remember John Mulroney? No, he came back around for a little tiny bit when I started. Bring up a picture of John Mulroney, but I think he does mostly, so I was like Long Island shit now and probably jerseys stuff but these are the people that uh...

well this is a second he also put james matters instead of james matter and what's the first of course he did who's the first list it's a funny one i type in john maroonie it just automatically auto-corrects to john marini wow that fucking sucks. That's fame. Yeah, it sucks. Such shit. He goes, you definitely didn't mean this. Also, it's probably two O's because Vostas

noticed spell anything. He's got 145 IQ. Did you know that? You took a test on Facebook. Oh, he said he is. Okay, there it is. Okay. Here it is. So big J. You know, number two, Patrice doesn't count. I tell. We'll never really know if he's number three. If he would have held up to number three, I mean, it's been nine years. It is nice. It's a fair spot to just leave him there. He can't advance. Here's the problem I have with this fuck, right? Well, he also said sorry.

Oh, it's okay. He put, uh, Norton, he put Bonnie in front of me. Yeah. Are you? That's hilarious. Bonnie either has to be two on the list, or then you got to grade it completely fairly. Yeah.

You can't just throw it in the mix. She's before Rickles. I knew. Rickles that body. Rickles, Rickles thing was crowd work. That was his main thing. His jokes weren't good. His crowd work was what everybody came to say.

Sure. But apparently Bonnie, look, I love Bonnie. Sure. But I've never went. Bonnie's my favorite car. I love. She's so good. Love Bonnie, hilarious comedian. Think she's hilarious.

But number six on the crap, where he's such a, of all times, a chump. As chosen by Rich Fawes. Yes. He says only the first one is in order, the rest random. Yeah, but you know it's how he thought of them. It's not, no way, there's no way.

He just thought, he thought, Rickles after Bonnie, Rickles should come up first. It should be, it should be Rickles big J. Who else? I know Ian's funny. Ian finance. Yeah, a tall is great. By the way, it's Ian bag, not bags.

He's did everyone, Richard Belzer is horrific at crowd work. He's even gonna comedy. I don't think to speak the whole of the dead. I think he's dead, right? Richard Belzer. He's dead. Yeah, we can talk about that. He's shook, shook, shook. Sucks, such shit at comedy. It's one of the other dead. I think he's dead, right? Richard Bells. He's dead. Yeah, we can talk about we can talk about that. He's so suck such shit. It's one of my the young comedian special.

Remember that DJ Lou, I made you watch that when he keeps his, uh, he goes, something about the juice. Oh, no, I kid the juice. Cause what's going to always like fake. See, I'm not I fought Richard Bells or socks at comedy. Very much enjoyed him in the early years of S.V.U. though, loved him, detective munch. That list is fucking atrocious. I hate lists too. I can't believe he made a list. Auto and George, Paul of Poundstone. No, where's that?

Paul of Poundstone. What, he, what, what is he talking about? Paula Poundstone, isn't she like, didn't she fuck young kids like young girls? I think she adopts it and then tried to fuck it. Oh, that's actually cool though. You give it a good life at least. Yeah, I don't know.

I had to legend, that's allegedly. I have no idea. I don't know what she did. Paula Bell, where's Paula Bell at? Never pulled out? Yes. She was actually funny. She had a laugh that made Christine sound like a Disney princess.

Remember her laugh? Her laugh was... It would scare the shit out of me. Me and Kurt, you remember her at all? We used to laugh really hard at her laugh. Her laugh was crazy. It was insane. She would yell crazy shit. She's gonna run around the pocket now to kick it raped. I like ball of metal man. She

would she would kill that and she's vanished. Who's Terry Hodges? No one knows. Someone Voss is gonna get yelled at by when he plays golf. Well, then he on the show Hunter. Fred drier Bob Zayn. Who's Jimmy Brogan? I know the name. Jimmy Brogan was the head writer of the tonight show forever. He always came and opened for Jay Leno at the time. He's great. I put it.

I'm not a crowd. I'm not a crowd. I'm not a crowd. Yeah. Is not a Paula Poundsell's not a crowd work person. Christine. He's really great crowd work

It's a not crazy you don't mean that Christine's unimpressed me I'm impressed I'm genuine you can please genuine genuine you're being real sees I'm being real sees right now Yeah Christine I got off stage 100% of the she was a three of the five shows this weekend Not once did she ever go like why you did really good? I heard can I tell you something from I had a little spy at the shows. Yeah, can I tell you yeah? I heard you murdered no, I heard you murdered. I heard you Dan Dan killed I heard there was one person that did okay But every every every everybody I wasn, everybody, I was in the

show, I'm not gonna say nothing, but I heard everybody killed it. Everybody killed it. Yeah, it was a good show. Yeah, so it was murdering man. So it was got some good, good stuff, new stuff I haven't heard. Who's that? He's a comedian. He's not any of these rich falseless.

Does Dan do Krabman? No, he doesn't do Krabman. Oh, yeah, absolutely. But not his thing. Like,ow? He doesn't do Krabinow. Yeah, absolutely. But not his thing. Like, no, no, no, Dan likes writing jokes and doing it. Dan has great, he does jokes, yeah, right? Yeah, no, his instinct is for jokes for sure. But no, he doesn't mean that.

Auto and George, I don't think they did Krabinow work. He should have done all living people too, because then on the list, they are. He can't. He's gonna feel like it's an order. He can't, He's 67. He has understand how this works or the Ian bags name is Ian bag. One of his friends who did comedy did it with a violin back in the day.

Why are we so do we glaze over Groucho Marks being in there? He did not does not that's not there. Groucho Marks is number 16. Now we tell you what's hilarious about that. Vos must be 150 years old to say Grouchoucho Marx, and then now I understand why. Go to the second list for steam. Groucho Marx. Now I fully understand why Judy Gold

might be a little upset with Voss for not putting one the list. Groucho Marx, you cock sucker. James Mattress. You put Jessica Kursin on the second list. Yeah, well, she's nuts. She does gray crowd. Dude, you, she does. That's nuts. She does great crowd work.

Dude, you got to leave room for Crouch of the Mons. He probably knew he was going to come on the good crowd work list. Oh, God. We have to have Vos on and really trash him for this. Vos, crowd work laws. I'm making a list. Yeah, everybody do it. I don't think great show to you.

Christine has never not impressed my comedy more. Or she takes it fully for granted. Well, because great show to you. Christine is never not impressed with my comedy more or she takes it fully for granted. Well, because she's with you all the time. She knows, look, Dawn doesn't ask me how I'm like, I come over from the weekend. She doesn't go, how was the show? I don't know, I don't know. I asked her.

She never cares. Even at night, it's never like, how was it? Sure. She was there. Mm-hmm. I ask you after every show every time I talk to a fan. In front of a arena. How did you show?

What did you want, Jay? Huh. What did you want Jay? Huh? What did you want? What would make you feel good great job say one of the things I had that's new is funny since I only have 20 minutes of Some kind of in-house encouragement maybe yeah It's kind of sad Christine. I do encourage you. I know you're lying because you're singing And when you're you're saying you're like I do encourage you. I know you're lying because you're singing and when you're saying what you're like I do I do What did you say anything to him this weekend? Yeah, she's like yeah, yeah You got squeaking of voice. I mean she's singing every every words coming out as a song

I was like, oh, I forget what it is now. But I was like, oh, when you said this and this, it killed. This was great. Like, you're just psyched out. It was after I pointed out. So we had to point it out and then you doubt, and then you made sure you were aware of it. That's kind of mean, Christine. You're there.

You'd be lying if you said I didn't point it out first. What'd you point out? You did. That's so nice. It's fine with me if she's like my girlfriend, and she's like, you want to get to see She's like See there's food or whatever like Take it didn't happen you you Got off stage for a 10,000 people there's no way that you walked up say 10,000 people killed it and she went you hungry

She wanted to get back on right ebikes She didn't fuck about my set was in the way of her way. Did they have ebikes? Yeah, the ebikes are super fun. That sounds fun though. Obviously. That hilariously got pointed out. In fact, you don't have an ebike is a mind blow to me. Yeah, I get one. But also Jay got pointed out on Father's Day. We had all these ebikes to play with and Isabella doesn't know how to ride a bike. You didn't teach your fucking daughter how to ride a bike. Okay. It's two days after father's day. I mean, the fuck, I threw max down a hill on a bike. Yeah. Yeah.

He's a boy. It doesn't matter. Yeah. You gotta tell me how to ride a bike. You never taught, you don't have to ride a bike. Oh, I know how to ride a bike. So you had to ride a bike and then you abandoned your family. You didn't teach a daughter.

No, when you abandoned the family. You didn't spend a couple days teaching your daughter how to ride a bike. Did you get her? You never got her a bike. So I mean this she. Part of a girl's got things she did. They built a bike and she brought the bike home and hung it on the wall.

Oh no, she bought it home today. She bought it home. Yeah. She put in the garage. I took it out of the garage and I was like, this is awesome. I go to like works. It's like a completely functional bike, and she was like, yeah. And then I wrote it around the block and showed her

that I'm like, oh my, this thing does, like this is a functioning bike, is it? Well, this is really great. And then I never, we never pulled it out again. Why? She never really expressed the interest in it. She didn't, what are you talking about? You're supposed to express the interest.

Max didn't want it, listen, Max didn't want anything to do with the bike. He nothing, I had to force him on it. Really? On the, because it's, dude, you're gonna fall. I had to put him on grass, push him, pull him, and then keep, every day, make him go a little further and a little further, and one day, I got it on video.

It was one of the greatest days of my life to see my son just barrel down the street on his bike. It was like his first day of freedom. That was his first thing of, hey man, my kid's not gonna be here forever. He's taking off down the street on a bike. This is the first time he left me by himself and his independence was all in that,

that first couple of pedals by himself. And then he was probably while he's going to do drugs. And this is Bell doesn't. I don't know. I don't know. I'm just bullshitting. Oh, that freedom.

So young, I think he's going to do drugs. Well, at least don't know how to get home. He'll get home at night on a bike. Oh, isabel. You're taking it over. She's fine. Dude, we have to teach her. Do you want me to do it? No. Let me spend some time. I try to do it this weekend for a couple seconds. And then you just started playing on your own

e-bike while I did it. Yeah, you're not going to figure out this thing. So I'm going to go hop on this e-bike and just look. She didn't find a tricycle. That's a pretty cool tricycle that worked though. Oh, God. She was having fun and she was pedaling. Was it motor that had a battery? No, it was a child. It's from Bob's burger's tricycle. Yeah, it was like, no, it's an adult tricycle. Did she not have a swim? Yes.

Did you teach you how to swim? No, swim class. Oh, okay. But you couldn't, that's crazy. That's nuts. Well, where were we ever around a pool, really? Well, you had a street you lived on. You could have thrown her on the street

and taught her how to ride a bike. Oh, I think you're gonna say that you wanted to learn how to swim in the street. Well, those puddles. You got a street. Throw her in the street and teach her how to swim. Remember that flood you had? Yeah, oh boy, you're a swim to the house then.

She, yeah, is about as I don't know how to ride a bike. She doesn't know how to swim for sure. Why didn't, was it the neighborhood you lived in? She's getting driving down. Oh, we also let her drive golf cart was pretty cool. She doesn't have a swim for sure. Why didn't, was it the neighborhood you lived in? She's getting driving down. Oh, we also let her drive golf cart was pretty cool. She doesn't have to drive. She's learning how to drive. How old are she?

20. She doesn't have a license? This isn't that crazy of a thing in New York, Bobby. This is a different place. You're coming from a different place. And it's weird how it's so different. I agree with you on that. She could have done, she could have learned how to drive

whenever she wanted to. I've taken her out driving before. I let Matt. I did it once. I think Christine's taking her a few times. Her mom's taking her a few times, but I, I let Mark Max stare on the highway. That's crazy.

I let him grab the wheel and stay in between the lines and the highway. On your lap? No. From next to you. Too heavy. From next to you. From next to me, I let him grab,

I grab, I grab, I grab, he just, I just, a little bit. I let him just, you know, keep it between the lines. Michael. From next to me. I let him grab. I just, a little bit. I let him just, you know, keep it between the lines. I let him start the car. I let him throw him the keys, go start the car. Really? Fuck yeah.

You guys are going to go cartwheeling down a highway one day, because you jerks the wheel on you. Dude, I remember driving. He's going to be all drugged up from all that freedom he gave him. Dude, I used to steal cars when I was 13. Yeah. Yeah, we used to wait in front of the deli, you know, they'd pull in and... Not locked the car. Then we'd just jump out to go get cigarettes and something leave the car running, we'd

jump in and take it and then just drive around. Really? Yeah, then we'd just leave it. Let me just fucking leave. Did you trash it? No, well, we trashed it, like burnouts and... Yeah, yeah. Because we couldn't drive crazy because we were going to get arrested by the cars, we'd

drive around and then we'd take it to Spice of Field they had the Tufts University had this big park that they had baseball and their football team and we we do as a point where you could take a car up into the field and we'd always take it up into the field and we'd run over the the soccer posts because they were made out of wood so every week they'd have to put them back up because they had these you know the soccer team and they were made out of wood. So every week they'd have to put them back up because they had these, you know, the soccer team where the fuck it was and we'd run it over.

We'd always steal the car and just smash them. Jesus. And then one time we were doing it, we had like this Monte Carlo. It was really nice to do it with T-tops and we're flying in the last second. My friend grabbed the wheel. He was like, no.

And we just skidded and then ting, they replaced him with metal. No. So if we had that, they would be fucking dead. So he saw, you notice it last second. You notice that it wasn't wood, it was metal, and he's last second, he just, you just hear the cougo ting, really? Good boy.

Yeah. Dude, I stole my mother's third wedding. To Larry, one of her friends was like, hey, Bobby, go to the car, get me my cigarettes out of the glove compartment. And I was like, hey, Bobby, go to the car, get me my cigarettes out of the glove compartment. And I was like, all right, I took our keys and I just went for a ride. And I came back to the wedding and the whole wedding was on the front lawn. Well, I have to ask our guest where she's from and if she drove in a certain, because

Dave Smith still has no how to drive. Oh, it's so weird. He's 40. That's crazy. I started driving it like, like I think I got my permanent 16 instead Oh, it's so weird. He's 40. That's crazy. I started driving it like Like I think I got my permanent 16 instead of 15 and that was weird I got my permanent 15 at the day I turned 16 I failed a driver's test and then a week later I passed it Yeah, I got my license as soon as I get and I bought a car for 250 bucks to me I had a car before my license to me. It was exactly like that. Oh, man I could like go do something now get the fuck out like. Like I can get, I mean, I don't have my own car, but I was like my folks car, but like, you know, even like, to me it was like, I'll go to the store, you know, I mean, like,

what do you have to go shopping? Just give me the list. I'll go do it. Because you want to like, I was so excited to. I remember picking a girl up in a car. I remember my, no, her door didn't open. Sorry, dude. My door, the night before I bought this, you know the Hostoski and Hunch car? Oh, the Grand Torino. I bought one of those. And the night before it happened,

the kick-out in an accident and smashed the door, the driver's door, I think it was driver's door. So you had to get in the passenger door to the car. So I always had to get in that side to pick girls up. And you had to turn the car on, the electrical thing fused together. So like when you turn the lights on, the car started, and if you wanted heat,

in the winter, I would have like a girl, be like, hey, do me a favor, you call it, she's like, yeah, I'd be like, open the glove, there's two wires, connect those wires, and it would go, just spark. And then the heat would kick on. I never had a cool car ever growing up to pick up a girl and feel cool And yeah, but the shitty of the car. I thought the cool you were well if you know

No, if it was yours. Yeah, if it was yours I friends would get shitty cars and kind of like put like a crazy stereo in them though. Yes Yeah, like that stuff like that, but I didn't even have that. I just had like Like that, but I didn't even have that I just had like On that cool hatchback and then a Saturn. I love those I you put the if you put the cool the one that pulled out the Facepale or the face play that yet they pull out and then I would have my graduation Tassel went in every car I had and it was my symbol So I would play the drums and I I grab it

Oh, and I pinched a symbol and I would play the drums, and then I grab it, and I pinched the symbol, and I would actually do that. Don remembers when I first started dating her, I would get in the car and drive, and play the drum, bass, go do, do, bass, do, pop, boom, back, grab my, mute, my tassel. I remember like the first cars, that it was like a 85 Thunderbird and a Chevy Corsica that like the first boys that

Picks me up in cars where I was like, you know, not in a car with my parents. You know what I mean and cars back then I just showed Max. We were at his Just you know what a fuck you're gonna dodge dark fucks both of those guys The old cars were Fuck fuck machines because there was no center console There was it was just it was just like just it was just a bed the front seat and the back seat even the front seat was two seats But there was no concert was just these comfortable cloth cushion. Yeah, my god man get dude It's none better than fucking on the felt of a seat of a mercury cougar and then nothing worse than trying to get jizz out of it

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