The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Ignored In The Cabin
Episode Date: July 28, 2023Jay gets totally ignored by the cast of Blackish when he apears on Bert Kreischer's "The Cabin." ...
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I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. Ocarson.
We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just a podcast.
For full episodes of the Bonfire you can listen on the Series XM app.
Go to seriesexm.com slash Bonfire for a special offer.
And now the Bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Robert Kelly
Currently on tour by the way and I don't know if it's any kind of good. I want to be a fine some video on that
But he's fat as a house. No, he's definitely fat. He's a big ol fat queen, but I think he lost weight I think I think you got the surgery and he's on those epic. He's on those epic. Oh, man
So if you I think it comes out tomorrow if you're not a subscriber to guess digital, but
We had rent as easy and saggo alone last night. Yeah, and we just did so many ozampic songs and then one of them
We just sang ozampic to the entire national anthem
It was so that go. It's very stupid you get pictures of oh
Sam
Yeah, ah it we did the entire so it's it's worth a giggle elicit
Check it out if you haven't a lot of bonfire fans don't listen to Legionist scanks and vice versa. I say listen to them all
They're all their own animals
It is weird. Well, I did Vermont last week and I came out to greet the fans as I do.
Because that's who I am. It's time for guy.
I am some people don't go out, but I will go out after a show and I will meet all
37 of these people.
You go out right away.
No, I what I do is I take 10 minutes because 10 minutes will allow the people that don't want to have anything to do with me
Or don't give a shit or you know to leave or something people are just fans and they're like well
We got a babysitter. Yeah, they got to go so let them get out
Yeah, and then the people that really want to I will go out meet them
But no, there was a lot of I do that, but I make it I probably stretched out a good half half hour. That's just too long
It's a long time, but the people know the people know if I did that you're out there and you've hung with me after a show though
You get the time dog you get a lot of time if I did that Jay there be one person
And it'd be the same person every show
That crazy son of a bitch you follows you around. But there was YKW defense. It's weird because they kind of gang up like they become like
it's prison. It's like, yo, YKW defense man. Okay, open Anthony, right? Yeah. They're
always older, you know, bad knee. I mean, and then you have YKWD fans usually do dads with their wives,
you know, and then the the bonfire fans, which are very young. A lot of you and Vermont young
fans, too, because comedy fans, they're comedy fans and but they always, you know, go crack
or crackle at the end, which is great. But it was kind of interesting to me to see all the different members of my gangs.
The factions?
I know.
It is very, what's one faction talk?
This is this faction.
It's fractions.
The fractions of the group.
Yeah, it was, but it was kind of like, wow man,
this is, this spans generations of me talking
into a microphone or doing standup
that there's, you know, OP&A fans, YKWD fans, now bonfire fans.
It's pretty, pretty.
Yeah, it is interesting when they give time for applause on each for me.
Yeah.
When they'll do, because that's what's weird when you see like the city.
Like, you know, it's why I've always told Lewis and Dave I'm like, get to get to Denver.
It's like a skanks town.
Like, they say, like, you know, from the bonfire gets claps and applause, but like and it's like skanks goes not some cities
It's bonfire they go nuts and skanks like I see let's know all I see let's do them all too
But it's weird because oh and a fan's are aggressive and they're just you are show I've seen our show Ralph will fucking pop a stitch
I've seen our show Ralph will fucking pop a stitch. Yeah, we can.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,. I mean, according to what he said, that way. I mean, did that blow you away?
It would have crushed me if I was you.
I mean, can I tell you something?
Great, let's stop for a second.
Let's give a little show context.
Okay.
Ting, ting.
Do we have a context, little bingy bing?
There's a context music.
Thank you very much.
I didn't have to ask for it.
A little context music?
I went clear with context.
I was doing fucking way better shit.
We were being.
Can you give me the check please, little snapping at me.
I'm sorry buddy.
I was sorry.
What are you putting on your, is that lip balm?
I thought there was a nervous habit you just sucking
on your fingernails, the edges of them.
Yeah, we, Jay, I just want to be honest with you right now.
I forgot what I was going to say.
Um, context, context before that got that, but that's it.
I feel like I got a contact high or something.
It's impossible.
You weren't even off of an egg sandwich.
Oh, okay.
I love it.
I love it.
No, it was what the fuck, man.
Oh, yeah, when my call to we, I did when I when the pandemic hit I had 50 shows. Yeah
Creeps with kids tour
We had sold out Grammacy. We had sold out. I mean Tampa. We had 14 shows on the book theaters
It was fucking on fire started with one show
We were going on tour with this thing show time was coming down to look at it
for a
Maybe a possible show creeps with kids and change people like you were in you were gonna be in on an episode
Where we'd go and see your family you'd spend time at your kid and then you'd go do the show and you do the jokes about the
You know the kid just to behind the scenes of being a parent and being a creep and a comic.
If you guys were really funny, you'd have gotten Carla instead of me.
But I mean, my ex-wife, that's comedy.
I know she does.
So, I'll give you a little context.
Well, Don's starting, anyway, she's going to show at the stand.
She wants, can you do a scanning class this year?
There is a point though where you have to just go,
which is the Christine, like,
I never had an issue with it at all,
and that's genuinely true.
But people have always asked me with like,
is that weird or something like that?
It's only weird if she's like, can I open for you?
I think she asked me one time.
She did ask, but she has for like governors though.
Yeah, but she can, I mean, look, I don't care.
I don't care, open for me.
I like Carla a lot.
I do.
Yeah.
That's what I'm saying. More than Christine, you tell me behind her back.
Yeah.
I mean, behind her back.
Oh.
The fuck?
She's just nicer than me than Christine.
Christine, you're scared of me.
No way.
I swear to God, Christine, you stare at me.
You don't blink and it makes me feel like you're doing witchcraft.
Oh, Carla just fawned over Bobby's skin.
She has a big deal with a skin.
I think she was.
I think she was good.
She never stopped calling Bobby hot, Bobby.
I know.
I'm out to Carla.
That's it.
She just gives up on me like that.
Fight for me, bitch.
But anyways, when we did the thing,
all my shows were gone.
My Calta stepped in and goes,
body, we're gonna do, I don't know how to do it,
my Calta.
I'm not done so I wish Dan was here.
Body, hang on, body. Hey, I don't know, I got it my calda. I'm not saying so, I wish Dan was here. Buddy, hang on, buddy.
Hey, I don't know, I got it.
You got it, try it.
It's a lot of breathing.
That's it, that's it.
Yeah.
You got it, right there.
And, you know, that's it.
Yeah, I don't know, it's not broken.
No, we can't do it.
Hey, we have to hear it.
I have to hear it.
Yeah, what's up?
It's Calda in the morning.
It's my mic calda.
Is that all right? Calda. I know. Anyway, hey, what's going on? It's myderon the more it's my my calda is that all right calda? I know
No, anyway, hey, what's going on? It's my calder in the morning. We're here. I got
producers but hole yeah
Last night you need to get an asshole tattoo and start showing the people on the go. Yeah, it's crazy
He yeah, he he actually
She rated the running panic commercials and every podcast so people find out who we are.
There's no, there's no.
Tattoo your ass hole.
Yeah, we had to do panic, fucking commercials.
Yeah, we do panic time.
I, but what I believe serious calls
the last ditch effort of advertisement runs.
It's just a promo.
It's promo, guys.
Yeah, okay.
You're gonna run this on every podcast.
We're trying guys.
Hey, if there's any other time in your day, why don't you check us out.
We know you love Jim and Sam, but what about us?
Jim's big time trumpet, by the way, so everybody.
Oh, we got to watch that video.
I sent you that video.
Yeah.
So anyways, he stepped in.
We did a podcast seven days a week.
Seven days a week, me and Kyle did a show and we did want to call the jerk off party that's
still going on Saturday nights.
We opened the zoom up to all the fans.
I saw the mama bear of the jerk off party.
Hey, Melissa.
And, and exactly.
That's what that's from. By the way those those drops were the context of what that means
Yeah, exactly and we did I mean dude, but we had a lot of patreon's we made some he
Suarez was with me in Texas one time and he had to moderate the jerk off party
But like from the green room of the comedy, do you remember that?
I do for a second. So hello. Yeah, the fans went nuts. But like from the green room of the comedy, do you remember that? I do remember that.
I did for a second and said hello.
Yeah, the fans went nuts.
That was a big prop.
Yeah, the rigs in there, the Lou.
Yeah, we had Lou.
We had Chirilu.
We had Scruffy bones.
We had Fat J.C.
We got Melissa.
Hey, Melissa.
Yeah, we had Jacob.
He's dead.
Sarah, she's gone.
She passed away.
A lot of drug off people died
Yeah, but Mike one but here's the problem is that Mike when I'll be curse Mike went on Lewis and him got no fight
Yeah, which happens with Lewis Jay Gomez tends to and he fought with a man so at times
I mean Lewis let me finish my sentence before you caught me off you son of a bitch this story is boring enough without me
God damn it.
Um, no, but he got to fight with Lewis.
And he said on to Lewis and because Lewis pitched him out
about my podcast with him and he said, I do it as a hobby.
I'm a professional broadcaster.
I have a number one.
I have a number one radio show.
And I was just left like a bitch.
He was fucking in the corner as he was talking to Lewis. Yes. I fuck her when I want to fuck her
Yeah, I don't really care about her. It hurts now when you say it. I know it does it fucking hurts now that he he called me a side bitch
Can I give you a little seven days a week a little bird christian-esque secret time? Yeah
Every time Sodor would say something about fur, I mean, like five years, about eventually
leaving the show, it would crush me internally.
We would be, it would always be hilarious most times, like, times two were like before
a moon tower show, and the crowds going nuts when the song starts playing, and I'd look
at him, I'd be like, yo, dude, this is crazy what we built this thing up here together and he'd be like,
yeah, you know, it's like it's gonna be great dude. Like eventually I'm gonna go on to do other things
and like you then you'll have this show. You know, and then you'll just have this thing.
Do you know what hurts? Do you know how to go, uh-huh.
Like can we just be happy right now?
Do you know what hurts even more is you bringing up Dan
Right now as I'm trying to fucking fill those fat guys shoes. Well those two hobbyists are out there jerking themselves off
I mean you were here fuck the goats on the ground
Yeah fucking in here in the fucking the fight. They were good enough to handle this kind of pressure
I'm gonna win. Me and you.
Daily broadcasting, they wish.
Daily broadcasting, next, next stupid moon towel
in the song plays.
I'm gonna put my hand on your shoulder,
and you're gonna put your hand on my shoulder,
and then we're gonna hold hands and go out there as a team.
Yeah, we're gonna touch foreheads,
it's one of those, like a Viking hook.
Yeah, we're gonna grab forearms.
Yeah.
Should we pick a theme song
Well for the next man tower. So you guys can have this moment this one right here. I want this one. I want Rocky
I want to go out there to Rocky think about that
You don't like it. We're not making it. This show's never gonna make it
Somebody call somebody called Dan. I'm gonna call Mike and we're gonna
If Dan and Calta start a show,
that's how to stand test to hit.
I'll throw up, I'll kill him.
I'll kill him, I'll murder them.
I'll go to G.O. for this show.
Very immediately more successful, okay.
All right, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Yeah, they take Stern's spot and his studio space.
We'll still stuff.
I thought you would never do Morning Radio,
because they threw a gang at Cash.
Yeah, gang at Cash.
We'll still stuck here in this refrigerator that has no rights next to I'm next to golem with a hood on I mean come on light
of fire Jacob do something Jacob's a fucking a Bob sledding outfit what the fuck are you doing you
look you look like we're gonna an oil rig we take that thing off yet the thing is so not pinned
that it's almost on heat it's hot here It's not even it's not cold here right now
Why don't you sit bother? I just put this on because it doesn't bother me
I'm just saying like it's it's a I know you're underneath the thing
But it's but you don't feel it there you look like a stock car racer. We don't understand the hood
Show you a space here Bobby
He's fucking mentally ill. There's nothing I feel the air blowing down on you. We'll show you a space here. Car Bobby. Car Bobby.
He's fucking mentally ill. There's nothing.
No, hang on.
There's nothing.
Did I was?
I was.
The air's off.
You believe in ghosts.
I feel like wherever you were sitting,
you'd be covered like that.
It's not that cold.
Yeah, you look like a weird priest. That hood, there you go. Look like that. It's not that cold. Yeah. You look like a weird priest
that hood. There you go. Look at that nice hair. I took it off to feel the breeze, the air.
Did not exist in air. The Bobby Sessions in your head. Maybe this one I'm making it up.
Jay, I didn't until Bobby Keewe over and said you're feeling ghost air conditioning. For comedic
purposes, he said there's no air coming down. Maybe this will make you feel better. Maybe lie.
Maybe what? Did you lie? I don't ever lie. I don't lie. But you do
sometimes say things you have no idea if it's true or not. Yes, but that's not a lie.
That's wrong fact.
Shual guesstimations. Those are those are Bobby facts. Yeah. I bought I got Jacob. I
got Jacob gifts from Kevin. One of them from Kevin, T-shirt Kevin, our boy Kevin.
T-shirt, oh nice.
Oh, look at this.
Okay.
Little context.
Nice.
Jacob.
I'm sure.
Jacob had a sex dream about Christine back in the day,
and it was a very vivid sex dream
where she came in and lied on top of him.
She was cleanly shaved.
She worked him over.
She worked him over.
And we have a
shirt now with beautiful Christine on it. And it says, what dreams are made of. And it's her,
with I believe a beacup or a small sea. Yeah. No, it's definitely a hotter version of me.
Now it's a picture that I took of her a couple weeks ago. It's the picture of her. That's for you
right there. Gift, maybe that will warm you up. I'm like tight little ass is so wet waiting for you.
And this one, I think this is for you, Jay,
but it might be a little small.
It'll be small, so I think we put it on DJ Lou
and see if his girlfriend turns on Christine
and scratches his eyes out.
But I have other stuff for Jacob
because we're trying to, what do you say?
Not man him up.
Not man him up.
We're sexy in him up.
Sexing him up, so I bought him bracelets. If you wonder why Jacob, what do you say? Not man him up. Not man him up. What is it? Sexing him up.
Sexing him up.
So I bought him bracelets.
If you wonder why, Jacob, I do worry that it's not sexy
when you're wearing three wool jacks at a time in the studio.
I don't think it's sexy either.
I never claimed it to good look.
Jay, I love your fashion sense.
Thank you.
You're great.
You're hoodies, you're hair, you're feet, you're arms.
Which bracelet do you think we should have them try on first?
Which one?
Okay.
I'm always a sucker for some beads.
I like the circles because they roll around a little bit on the arm.
We try these.
Try these, the brown beads we're giving Jacob right now.
Is that too bad?
You have to put it on.
Isn't it a Taylor Swift thing where all the Swifties have beads? The beads are their universal now. I bought him a special bracelet. Okay. This is a legitimate
Beautiful bracelet. Okay, and it's brown also. It's brown because layer nice with those beads
No, no Jacob on the same arm as the other beads. Yeah, it goes on the same arm now. You're a earth-tone boy
Yeah, right? You love earth tones.
What do you do?
So I bought you a brown leather.
I'll just feed it for today.
You're wearing a deep gray wool hoodie
over an army green wool hoodie
over a wool shirt that is dark black.
So I'd say earth tones yes.
Here you go put that on.
This is a braided leather brown leather braided
with a silver real silver by the way.
Is it a magnetic clasp?
It's a magnet pull it apart and magnetic boom look at that
I mean now I'm not gonna lie. This is come did you hear the noise that DJ Lujus made? Yeah, he went
Yeah, and he never makes that sound unless this beer ham or gay men. It's it's it's in context
It instantly makes people shoulders chop shake it it makes it's it's in context. It instantly makes people shoulder
strawberry. It makes it look like you are more comfortable with those. You look
I'd buy double. No no no. Not only would I say double I'd throw another one on
there. Right well I'm gonna let you pick Jay. Not Johnny Depp territory. It's not
no. I would say maybe that one with two similar to similar to the other one. Here we go.
We have. I don't mind that black. Why are we one in the middle?
This one.
It's going to be all right now.
What's that?
Because I do like them.
But there's this line from 30 rock that was burned into my head where
Alec Baldwin's character, Jack Donoghies dressing down
This intern telling him everything he's doing wrong and then he ends and then he's walking away and goes and
Lose the leather bracelet
So after that I never thought
As always a thing that what do you want to be some stuff shirt like Alex Baldwin's character yeah you want to learn suits all that very successful
doesn't matter you want to shoot a woman with a gun is that where you're at is
that what you want to you want to have the dress of a man who shoots a woman with
a gun an unarmed woman who was just trying to help his movie be made yeah
yeah he had cold blood gunned her down yeah you with a sick shirt right I'm a
creative that's what she called you're creative let six-shoulder. I'm a creative. That's what you call creative.
Let me see that. Can you hold it up? Let me see that wrist.
I mean, did I knock it out of the fucking park?
Out of the park.
I mean, it looks awesome on you, dude.
Absolutely out of the park.
Can I, can I, can I, let me see what's left?
Sure, I sure, sure, yeah.
Let me, let me put it on my finger so you can see it.
Where do you get all these foveys? I had them specially made in the game all the way on the left
This one no no, I'm sorry. You're right. Yeah
Let's give that slap it on there. Let me just see
I don't think he's gonna understand how that works, Bobby. You have to show him. He's new to bracelet life
Look at it. I love it when I got a Chinese puzzle
to do here. I love it when it got a Chinese puzzle. It was full of heart. Slip it on your wrist.
Not too tight. You might have a little give.
We'll back together a little bit and even that out.
And there you go. But I would put this one over here.
It would go brown, black, brown.
You got to loosen that black a little bit.
This one. See you loose. Let it have some give a little bit there you go, dude Jacob shut up, dude. Are you about to rob a bank with a beach gang?
I mean, dude
They look so cool
Top notch love it looks natural
You're not gonna continue to wear those. Those would never have to come off.
You can do everything you can.
You can do it with those, shower with them,
sleep with them, all that stuff.
Yeah, wear these in the shower.
You can, I'm saying.
My point being, I'm trying to eliminate one of the excuses
while you will never put those on again.
Hahaha.
One of them being, ah, after the shower,
I forget the thing with the-
Get a throw them in a pile with the chains that
isn't wear.
Give it the rest to DJ Luma and wear them in no particular order
Lou I
Think the chains look good. I like everything. Yeah, just what I never wore before and
How do I put this everyone who beat me up and as a kid or these now you're taking the power back dude?
Yeah, how do you think they got the power to beat kids like you up through bracelets slave
masters invented the N word and now only black people get to use it.
It's a preparation, bro.
You're taking back the bully style.
And now you are the bully.
Guess who has bracelets guess who has bracelets in this room?
Oh, who else has bracelets dog?
Oh, what?
Bam!
Look at Lou.
Look at Lou.
Wait, Lou's not wearing it.
He's got his...
No, he does. He wears his...
He wears his mask around his neck.
It's a mask bracelet.
Because he rides in here with the Drebza Society on a bus.
Christine, boom, boom, boom.
Everybody has bracelets.
I know, dude. And you want a berry cock in that yeah, where I want a what?
Barry cock in it look at me. I'm not blinking Barry cock. You want a burry B. U. R.
Why cock yeah in that and that was me pointing a Christine. Yeah
Yeah, you're fantasy girl put the shirt. It was a hot dream. It was a hot dream. I actually had the same dream. Oh, yeah during the day. I forced it
Yeah, you just watched it. You just looked at a deep fake of Christine
I always say if you want to whack off to Christine the porn star and I've said it a zillion times
Ashley blue
Is that her name? I think looks so much like Christine. Get it blue.
Yeah, get it.
Young Christine.
But it looked a lot like Christine.
I think, yeah, can I say something about you right now
that will make you feel better?
I think older woman Christine,
way sexier than girl Christine.
Thanks Bobby.
Agreed.
100%.
Girl Christine cute.
Woman Christine sexy. agreed. agreed. 100%. Girl, Christine, cute.
Woman, Christine, sexy.
Woman, Christine, personality of an 85-year-old younger Christine, wild child.
Oh, I wouldn't talk to her for more than 20 minutes.
Yeah.
But, physically, if I just...
Which is, it looks alone.
What are you doing tonight, patting the dog?
No.
Christine, I seriously, I think that and Don did the same thing. Don
as a girl, just a goofy chubby bitch, if I may, because it's my wife. You may. But she became
better, a really pretty woman. There's some girls, when they're young're hot they get older they become They be get really fucked up, but girls. It's tends to be
Pretty girls like you know sevens the sixes and sevens, you know married girl
But when they become women something happens the hair their skin they take care of themselves more and
They fill into their face and Christine you're one of them you and Donna both very pretty women. Thank you. Yes. You filled in your face. Yep.
You've finally filled in your face. It makes sense like I I really just never
was like a young hot girl for what I mean those girls that are like out doing
you know spring break and their bikinis with their perfect bodies and like I
that was just never me. So I'm I'm happy
that like because I was a fat kid. I'm happy I'm not like a big fat lady. Yeah. Now Christine
was two days ago borderline ready to quit. Oh, Zampic. She lost 10 pounds now by the way.
Congratulations. She's she's reminded me of today's our shot day six times. We take it today or tomorrow. We do it tomorrow, right? We do it tomorrow. We did say tomorrow, right tomorrow is okay
I'm gonna vomit today today today is today. We do it today. I think right?
I'm not sure. That's how it works, right? It makes you sick to your stomach
So you just puke up all the food you ate for that day. Apparently well, it seems to be working that way for Christine
For me it makes me I'll tell you what what's so amazing about this dumb drug and I'll
drop it after this but last night I came home hungry like really hungry where you're like I'm about
to overeat like I feel that I can overeat yeah and I got three pieces like three fourths of a sandwich from a sandwich king, which are huge pieces.
And I mean, I took like two bites right of each one.
And then I was just like, I can't possibly, I was like, yeah, it's just over.
It's just Andrew.
Like, I'm looking at it.
I can't touch it.
I dumped into a coffee cup at George's Diner and Meredith Nehamshire.
That's horrific.
I got, because I got too hungry, my brain,
my fat brain, I waited to eat and then we went to eat
and they had seafood chowder, bread,
and they had American chapsuie, which is my Achilles.
Chapsuie's your American chapsuie.
What is that?
You've never had American.
I only know Armenian chapsuie.
It's the song by us.
It's the one for Down.
It was.
Did you get it?
I only know one Chop Sui, dude.
And that goes a little something like this.
Yeah, I'm playing drunk.
It gets to the good part.
What a brilliant song. Did you say you just chit into a cump?
No, dumping is throwing up.
I dumped into a coffee cup and it comes up in like little donut chunks.
On fart contact.
To dumping is not shitting into a cup.
No, yeah, barfired contacts.
Wank.
Bobby Achilles heel is American chapsoe.
He likes to see you in New Hampshire.
Then he throws up in a coffee cup. And his wife is embarrassed. He wants again. Bobby Achilles heel is American Chapsuui He likes to see you doing a new hamster
Then he throws up in a coffee cup
And his wife is embarrassed once again
Once again, that's his embarrassed once again once again
Once again, once again, trust
And...
Ozebac!
Looking at some boner guy
And... Look at some boner guy and the lake.
We enter Rob Cobbles fucking.
It's a great song.
American Chapsule is also my Achilles heel turns out.
American Chapsule.
American Chapsule, Jay, let me tell you what American Chapsulee. American Chapsulee, Jay, let me tell you what American Chapsulee is. It's elbow pasta with a meat, a red sauce, not a gravy, red sauce with peppers, onions,
sometimes mushrooms, and hamburger meat.
Hamburger helper?
No, that's a matter of, there it is, right there.
Oh my God, one of my favorite, favorite dishes,
comfort food.
It would have never, I mean, I definitely had that
in my life, I don't know if I've never heard
of Claude American Chops.
It's amazing.
It clearly is called that.
American Chops, so the one on the right, though,
the cozy cook, that's the chunks of meat
when it's big chunks of hamburger meat.
I thought it was something I like to make at the Super Bar at Wendy's when I was younger
It's close. Yeah, I don't want to make it. It's so good
And I got it and I ate too much of it and I had I had this chowder and I had a piece of bread and then I went
Into a cup
Like like like it look a little ball of
Looks like bread looks like I'm making my own bread.
It came out.
Yeah, yes.
Yes, oh, oh, Zenfrey.
Christine, you still want it?
Christine, we'll make it.
I'll make a few.
We'll make a few.
I'll make a few.
I'll make a few.
I did not belong in a nice place.
This is why we can't have nice things.
Cause Dad's always gonna do.
Dad's always gonna do.
I also, I talked to our doctors at the stand who did it.
I love the assingative from Max's perspective.
But Dad yelled at me on a hike.
My Dad won't throw up in front of all of my school friends.
I'm social pariah because of my father's behavior
There he goes again my pop are you I saw you up you can on it. Oh my god a lot
I can keep my food down. I'm pretty excited. Did that's not good. It wasn't that bad this week
She would shit it out, but I plugged that up.
Nice.
My doctor's assistant who did it, I talked to him about it because I'm trying to get
us prescribed in the anti-naudia medication.
And he said that the first couple months where you're building up the level are the worst.
I mean, it's not.
It's like nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea, immediately to dehydration.
That sounds terrible for two months.
Is that my headaches? I mean, I'm down 10 down 10 pounds I was like I don't have a fuck
I'm shooting I'm shooting semi solid again though guys if I'm showing you better
I'm used to throwing up for my years of alcoholism. There was a good week of somehow I I mean it looked like
It looked like someone didn't upper decker in the bowl
I mean, it looked like someone did an upper decker in the bowl.
Like it was like, like, like shit water came down the sides of the bowl. So you had diarrhea from, for example,
I don't know, but it was from that, but I don't have it anymore.
Well, you were injecting your stomach with a foreign substance
and then you had diarrhea.
I would put that together.
I've been injecting myself in the stomach
with that foreign substance for weeks now
and only for the one week like a week ago
I had vicious vicious diarrhea.
Wow.
It's pretty much last week of the tour right?
Pretty much last week of the tour.
They had a place to get it though.
But from the dead slip and slide that stopped us from going down what is the asshole out?
I did not do the slip and slide.
I'm not real stoked on.
Bert will get it one year because he always ate, when I come back from an event that I clearly
wasn't going to do, like an activity, they go, Bert said, all day, where's Jay?
He kept it, like they make me feel bad.
He kept saying, where's Jay?
I'll get you.
Bert never understands, I do not want to take my shirt off and be a floppy, flippy, fat
fuck going on.
I don't, I can't.
My ego cannot take it.
Did he actually think you're gonna take a shirt off?
He thought on cabin that I was gonna get in a speedo
when wrestle in oil with them.
And what happened with that?
I went to the director, Tom Sik,
and I said, can you please,
could we talk to Bird about just some other way of it?
And I thought of like a funny alternative for it.
What was that? You guys suck each other off in the cabin and I thought of like a funny alternative for it. What was that?
You guys suck each other off in the cabin?
We were beekeeping outfits.
That's funny.
In the first part of the episode.
So I said, let's cut up a beekeeping outfit
like a ridiculous, like, you know,
make it like short shorts and like, you know,
like a one piece thing that it was, but like.
I love fat physics.
Oh yeah.
And fat people have to figure out shit in a game.
Well, I can make it funny.
Yeah, it's like dude, I gotta get out of this.
Nice sitting on his rose.
When I, when he goes, oh yeah, let's talk to Bert.
And Bert was like, Jay doesn't,
no if he's like, if he's into the like speedos
and oil wrestling thing he goes.
Yeah, I mean, we can just do it with like water.
It doesn't have to be oil.
And I'm like, no, no, no,
he's like, Bert's not not that's not the issue.
The issue is the speed.
It's what we end up doing the thing with the beekeepers after.
I think it's completely removed from the episode also.
Why?
The entire thing.
Why?
Told you the cast of NBC's Blackish did not like me.
And they were, they, I was, I was whittled down.
Watch the episode.
You've watched it before, right? Oh, youled down watch the episode you've watched before right oh
You should watch it the way you make fun of tourgasm to how little I am featured in this episode
I mean wasn't in a show my my daughter called me and show always be like
Hey, it's neat. You were in something like she would that she was like did you not talk at all because it was just you were like in the background
Just the whole episode facial expressions were pretty telling
because you were like in the background just the whole episode. So facial expressions were pretty telling.
Is that a show where they mix worlds?
No.
Will they take like an actor and a comedian
and put them together?
What's the show?
No, it was actually booked to be like intelligently,
like they booked it to be groups of people that would make sense,
get along or sort of know each other or whatever.
You know what I mean?
And who are you with again?
Deon Cole and Anthony Anderson.
Yeah, that makes sense.
But they make sense.
They called me weak up.
Now here's what it was, it was Bert being awesome
and being like, let's get Big J in this thing.
It's an opportunity for me for sure again.
And you're wearing a bonfire hoodie
because you believed in the show unlike Dan Dan at that time. Yeah. Yeah. Dan were lesion of skanks stuff for you were bonfire
shit. But um, yeah, right away in the day that he was just, look at Dion Cole, looking at
you, look here in asshole. I mean, he, you can tell, look at his brow is frowned. He's like this motherfucker locked in on that. Hey, hey
You doesn't like me. He hey, you he doesn't like you. No, he hates Jay
That looks like he wants to stab you like you're in prison and you're opening up to a therapist
He's like this fucking bitch
He's gonna go it looks like it looks like we're in like rehab group therapy
Yeah, and he's like at this fat mother
Fuck a keep talk at denteon call so cool too cool. He's so cool
It's I met him in in Philly at the punchline. He came up and hugged me and hit a poncho on
Yeah, and I didn't know what to say
It didn't matter because he was making it work. He looked fucking he looked like share
He's the old guy now. I think isn't he he yeah, yeah, it's not in the same exact like
I took my joke did he yeah
Well, I don't know if he I mean look oh
Yeah, you said this on the show before
It's kind of sucks. It kind of sucks. I like him, but what are you gonna do?
Well, I want to like him. I don't think he oh he hates Anthony Anderson enjoyed me very much
Can I tell you a little something about Anthony Anderson more Anthony Anderson if I see Anthony Anderson and something I don't think he enjoyed me very much.
Can I tell you a little something about Anthony Anderson?
More Anthony Anderson.
If I see Anthony Anderson in something,
it's my first thought always is not any more.
Oh, Anthony Anderson, this might be funny or this might be whatever I'm like,
dude, that guy did not dig my vibe at all.
I did La Notta with Anthony Anderson.
Yeah.
And we were in the scene first scene.
Two times he did some fucking funny fucked up shit to me
It was a
Camry in the scripts and I got to walk up and go yeah, this camera he came in blah blah blah
And you rehearse your lines over and over to get the part then you get it and then you do it over and over again
You get on set the day of them in my wardrobe on a mechanic and there's it's a Corolla
So the director goes, I just quick,
the script supervises a quick note.
It's Corolla, not Camry.
We couldn't get a Camry.
We got a Corolla.
I'm like, okay.
Corolla, Corolla, Corolla.
I'm in a Corolla.
I keep, you know what I mean?
I got a switch because it's, you know,
and they go, okay, ready, set, speed,
and he goes, Camry.
So that's the... Oh! And I went, and I went, and he goes, Camry. That's...
Oh!
And I went, and I went, and I went,
Camry, and they were like,
cut, it's a corolla.
I'm like, I know, I'm like, fuck you, dude.
They just kept doing Camry to get me to say,
Camry, it's set a corolla.
And then he smacked me with, we do another scene,
and I had a book, and he takes the book
and cracks me with it.
Like, in the arm, like hits me hard.
Where is this guy get off?
I don't know.
I thought it was kind of funny though.
No, it is funny.
Listen, he was the bell of the ball.
I always remember, what I'm gonna call him?
Do you?
Yeah.
Text him.
Where are we gonna text him?
Do you like Jay Okerson?
Yeah, yeah.
Ask him if he likes Big Jay Okerson.
Did he, do you think Big J. Ocerson's funny?
Okay.
You don't have his number.
I ask him if those charges are true.
Okay.
Okay, but they usually become an apology after that when you accused me of lying.
Doesn't mean anything.
I'll take it though.
That could be, I would write anything Anderson if I had a girl's number I was cheating
on Christine with.
Oh, that's just anything Anderson text and babe.
Hey, bro, this is gonna be another friend runner by the way.
This is another Captain America.
He's gonna block my number.
I'm doing a radio show at Big J. Hokerson.
He says you definitely don't like him or think he's funny.
Any truth to that.
Hey, bro.
And don't robber Kelly.
I'm not who I am.
Comedian, I gotta put Robert Kelly because he might think I'm
our Kelly. I'm sure they're friends too. Robert gotta put Robert Kelly because he might think I'm our Kelly
I'm sure they're friends too Robert Kelly. No, you've got that's big accusation. What do you mean?
You just said Anthony Anderson is all free our Kelly that is that what I said, Jack said they're probably friends
I said they're probably friends. They probably know each other
He's a friend seems like he's probably got his friends back and that he's probably complicit well
I'm reading some news stories that he was also accused of some things. Anthony Anderson?
Yeah.
Should I ask him that first?
No.
Okay.
Ask if he likes me first.
And then if we find that he's guilty of stuff,
we'll then we'll text him that.
Hey, bro, sure.
Oh yeah, because I'll tell you what,
he's never been accused of this and then send him that.
And then also tell him to say hi to Chris Evans.
Ask him if you've Chris Evans numbers right.
Yes.
Yes.
Hey bro.
His wrote is Chris Evans's number right?
That's all.
Hey bro.
Hey, stop talking.
Hey bro, that seems okay.
Hi kids, he's, he's, he's, he's here.
Hey bro, man.
Hope you're well. I'm wondering I'm with my friend big J.
Ogasen. Do you think he's funny and did you do you like him?
He's not gonna answer. He's gonna say, I thought you were in jail,
motherfucker. And you have to explain you're not
Stop it's still on the thing it's saying all that because I didn't hit oh fucking say I
Because the thing when you don't hit the button off it just I gotta redo it. I can't not talking to radios though
No, you you really shouldn't you should keep talking
Especially that side of the room we gotta get some more ads
We gotta get some more ads to get some more ads and the fans really like you, Jason.
Yeah.
Hang on, Big J.O.K.S. and Motherfucker stop.
It's stop it.
It's still on.
I gotta read.
Okay.
I'm with my friend Big J.
There you go.
Okay.
What do you want to ask him?
Do you think he's funny, right?
Do you like him and do you think he's funny?
Yeah.
Do you like him and do you think he's funny? Yeah. Do you like him and do you think he's funny?
Period. I said you do. He's gonna first just look me up.
He doesn't remember that I'm the person he does show what there's no. Oh, then I wrote high fuck.
Can you erase something? Yeah, I can't erase it right now. Just like a word you seem to freak out
if you're like, because I sent it. And at the end of it, just subscribe.
Oh, you can ride it.
Yeah, it said, hey, Robert Kelly, the comedian,
hope you're well.
I'm wondering, I'm with my friend, Big J.
Do you like him and do you think he's funny?
I said you do.
And then it went, hi.
Robert Kelly, the comedian, not the pedophile.
This is Bobby Kelly.
I really enjoy chicks with dicks.
This is Bobby Kelly, Su-Fi. I don't, I do, I don't enjoy them. I appreciate enjoy chicks with Dix. This is Bobby Kelly. Sufi. I
Don't I do I don't enjoy them. I appreciate them. There's a big difference. I'll take what was fun? AI you're ruined all my fun. What was that an AI? Yeah, it wasn't a great Bobby Kelly
You know what it keeps getting better and better AI and it learns and the more you do it the more you run
Someone's voice through the more accurate it gets
Well, it wasn't great. No, that was my first try. We know we're fucking this is going
Yeah, we're gonna have you sing all kinds of terrible things. Oh, they're gonna fucking just get Dan to sit in here and it will be AI Dan
Chatchy PT what would Dan say right now?
Chatchy PT dude Dan doing runney Dangerfield answering that question, please?
You guys just have meetings the night before.
I want Dan to talk about this and then compliment me on this.
Dude, Dan?
Dan told me, like an abusive pimp, every day of our radio career, that he was going to
leave one day.
Every day I come in and go to another fun day of the show.
He goes, clock's ticking though, right? I tell you, Jay, I'll fucking I'll do this to the wheels come off. The wheels come off.
I'm here to make us leave the studio. I will fuck I'll do it after they fire us. Oh, yeah. I mean you know you won't but I
Well, yeah, I'm good man. Now when they shit can't us, dude, that's when we go big big we go big big
Yeah, they don't even know we're taking all of our fans with us. And
God knows how big or small that is. They don't tell you.
And we're taking all of everyone who listens with us. I don't know if that's a dent in the
company or not. If you had to pick one of your fan gangs, who would it be? What do you mean?
If you had to pick one of your fan gangs, to would it be? What if you? If you had to pick one of your fan gangs,
to what? To what? To what?
Yeah.
Each one's got different.
To conquer a small village in Iceland.
Oh, the Sleegin of Skanks.
Oh, sure.
Okay.
To show up at your wedding.
I just need bonfire.
Okay.
Ah, okay.
To now to be at the after party skanks again
To be at your daughter's wedding
on fire, okay
Now to to be at my daughter's gangbang cream pie dot com debut
Be it my daughter's gangbankreampide.com debut. The league is going to be a pretty nasty art show.
Nasty art show people.
Gotta mention that.
Hey everyone, my daughter's doing gangbank
cream pies.
If you wouldn't mind just being cool,
could you make her uncomfortable?
And we got nothing.
Hey, hey bro, it's Robert Kelly of the comedians.
It's the bro.
The bro is condescending from the young.
Yeah. Boy, what should I change it to?
Bro, uh, we are a. Hey, so what should I say? Hey, it's Robert Kelly of the
comedian. Should I remind him we did lawn order together? Say, uh, change up
bro from, hey, my brother from another mother. Hey my brother. No
How about some motherfucker
Sup my husband likes to curse SUP
Hey bro, it's Robert Kelly the comedian should I put a PS we did lawn order together?
Jesus Him we're going back to edit the text now. No, I'm gonna put I already
Big J, do you like the him? Wait, are you going back to edit the text now?
No, I'm going to put, I already added it.
Should I put, should I put, should I put some else a K,
you remember we did long-ordered again.
Oh, God.
Now it's getting embarrassing for you.
Wait, wait, no, that's not him.
That was done.
So the three dots come up.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
I will have secretary if you're not my husband.
Thanks, Jacob.
You ended a marriage.
You're happy with yourself.
Well, why now why do you say he doesn't like you?
He's a pretty, uh, Stoic dude, right?
Wasn't he a comedian?
I don't know.
They said, yeah, at some point, but like he hosted that thing,
that comedy mixed tape, he would like hosts.
Right.
Why don't you think he liked you?
Who doesn't like Jay Big J Elkerson?
They just, I was shut down all day.
What do you mean, they?
Those people.
What do you mean those people?
What the hell are you saying?
Canadians.
You know what I mean, man?
Jason.
What else?
I mean it, bro. Me and Lil were in our shirts, baby. Jason
Me a little wearing a shot
Shirts maybe jantics and six fat. No, you guys know how they get who's they damn. Oh them
You mean them them oh
They
They can get they can get real snappy
Is there a double-double-dwinged?
We're going nuts with it. Why do you have your own TV wraps up blue? What are you gonna play?
Song for them. Huh for them people. Let's hear what do you think them people songs are
Yeah
Kill it will that watermelon
Black we win the mother fucking house that water man's really fucking house
Black we win the motherfucking house Black really went the motherfucking house
I thought by the third one though, do the thing the drop for it
You know, there's he probably gave this phone to some like the third cousin in like Atlanta
Probably has this phone now. Yeah, somebody's got two first names. I call it. Should I call it? No, yes? No, yes
Now you gotta tell me on a radio show. It will end your
Here's the problem. Why would I'm what do you blame? Let me just we can you give me a little bit of the blame for Chris Evans a little bit
You give me a little bit. I merely suggested the dream fantasy that I wanted to do in this reach out the fact that you are willing to do it like if you were
J text somebody famous in your phone, which I don't have many. I got a few in this reach out. The fact that you are willing to do it, like if you were
Jay texts somebody famous in your phone, which I don't have many, I got a few
text this crazy thing, I'd be like, no, no, no, no, no, they're gonna like, no way. So you're blaming me?
For being, I think, it's not blame, blame's the wrong word.
For doing it. You did it. I did it because you told me to do it. I was taking advice from a friend.
That's not advice.
That is advice.
You said, dude, this is how you...
It was the funniest outcome was for you.
You just flat out asked Chris Evans a question and have him shut you down and block you forever,
which he did quick.
He did.
He did that so quick.
Is this an example of anything interesting on enjoying me?
Oh, okay.
Please.
Stop really quick
These they visually yeah it lasted very short him sitting next to me because that's the first thing I know
It's that's the first thing of the day visually he hates you both of these both of them them hate you
Yeah, can you run for a context like what are we?
Bert at what is this is it? This is
Berk-Rysh's cabin. And it's where you're supposed to, the
concept was a few people each episode are up with Berk. Berk's
supposed to be relaxing up at a cabin. They told him to relax,
but instead he kept calling his comedian friends and and
Caitlin Jenner to come up to his cabin and do like adventures with him, little like local
adventures at the cabin.
And you say it's supposed to be, I say they were mixing worlds to get controversy, but you
say no, they were putting people together that will have a good time together.
No controversy whatsoever.
But I was called in, this thing was probably booked months and months in advance, I'd have
to assume, that's how it works
They called me three days before I had to be out in LA
I know excited cancel a gig remember like that weekend and
I flew out to LA Christine just said, uh-huh. She has no idea what you're talking about
Got the worst air B and B. I ever got my life. Why? It was an apartment building and it's like there was very difficult,
very difficult deal with. But that's not the one you got locked out of with the food. It is. Yeah.
That's terrible. You had food in your hand. And then they don't tell the front desk that you
that you got locked out because you're not supposed to be. It was just like a whole thing. It's up.
Anyway, in between that, I went to to do this show where they did not enjoy
me. I think it was like one day shoot. I think I had to be there one day, but it was like
morning till like late night. But right away, we're sitting on that bench, that park bench,
that was the first thing the day where he's sitting next to me and he moves away.
You've never met this guy. No. And you never met, you knew the other guy though, because
he's a Philly comic. Do you a philly comic like I said he's
not from philly but he's a comic no I think you should go I want to say the uncle but he's
uh he's great they're both great they just didn't like me the uncle not so much the uncle
was like pretty friendly over the course of day quite honestly uh we didn't like
interact funny on the show at all but he was very nice
and the answer wasn't not nice either but he just you know what was he was just
sandbagging me in the sense of
uh...
he wouldn't go along with the thing
so it wasn't he was like saying i suck or anything but i would just say some
you know up uh...
uh... devil gonna strike you down not me you know just too much of that like
he was afraid of your comedy
for it to be a sort of he't he wasn't playing yes, and yes
He wasn't playing yes, and it was just he was afraid he wanted it
He was stealing your fucking thunder but in his defense. Oh my god
Because him and the uncle were probably both like why is this guy here?
We could have just done this ourselves, but isn't that what I said at the beginning that they stuck somebody with somebody they're not supposed to be with
Somebody was supposed to be there. Oh, maybe
Maybe maybe maybe like
One of these they got they got
But instead of one of these he they got they got they got they got one of you
Instead of that one of them they got this right here
Fine, you just put Jay with like two strangers, you know me. Oh, yeah
I went with a real like oh man Anthony Anderson me myself and Irene like I'm gonna go in and I was just like by the end the day. I like I Don't even know if he's like a boy when he left
Yeah, I think he was just like when he was out. He was out. I get it so far
He's like defending him. You shouldn't get it. You're a nice guy when I don't get you're a nice guy
You're one of the nicest guys in the human on the planet and anybody gets along
I've never met anybody who doesn't get along with big Jay
Okerson and I put the blame
You know what I'm deleting this goddamn number out of my
Welcome so we can't text go fuck yourself piece of shit
Thank you burnt that bridge another one for my friend big J and context on the bonfire
I am here to stay bitches.
So suck on that.
Suck on that.
They're going into each other party and just go on fine.
They're sin.
Yeah.
Bobby's going to be taking pictures.
They think I was in a room.
They're vacation together.
This moment here, yeah, where there are in the show.
So they're roping us.
That's the crazy deep tissue massage.
I love those. I hate them, but I love them. It's vicious, but I will say very scary.
Deon Cole just started bleeding from his nose and mouth. I'm sorry while this was happening. Nothing happened to his head at all. Like whatever they're nodding loose or knocking loose demons.
or knocking loose demons it was pretty crazy his nose and mouth started bleeding you should not bleed from massage that's not a good sign I'm pretty sure
that's in the books yeah if your patient starts bleeding stop immediately and run
and run take a take all evidence of your name and run there's a demon get a
cross use the Lord's name keep play do you have any of these moments where well it's about to go the park adventure back to the little
this is it
white is thing I've ever done
what is one thing you've done we use as a kid growing up in comp and you'd be like
wait I'm doing I can't believe I'm on a sale book
okay one I never thought I'd see this in my lifetime.
Going to the White House with a black president,
and the black president, knowing who the fuck I was.
I know, I know how to.
You're not in...
...the Air Force, too, to Afghanistan, to do a USO tool.
And then finding out that, and there's a black president
in the White House, because there's Kool-Aid on Air Force, too.
I have a package of great Kool-aids from Air Force 2.
I was like, oh shit.
The first trip to the White House, you stole some bathroom tiles and brought them back to
me because they had the White House seal on them.
And that was like everything.
I had never seen linen in this thick.
And there's like a wall between you and the three of them.
I feel like I know what I was going to say.
I think I'm holding back saying like, the couple of black guys the way how she immediately starts
dealing shit. Wow. I held back saying it here. It feels like and I've been there, Jay,
like they're having a three-way conversation. They are not interested in moving. You're
just sitting there. I'm hanging. It's uncomfortable. I've never bonded with you so much than this now. This is breaking my heart because I've been there
Nice
Fake laughing. James fake laughing right now. Yeah guys crazy
Yeah, this is fun. This is red at my alley
I'm not at the beginning did it for me. Can I play a little more? Can I hear a little guys?
Sure. I love uncomfortable.
And then a year later, we was in the way.
We were in there. I was crazy. I went and went him one time to the white house.
Why am I there? I'll tell you.
They're having such a real moment.
But it's a real moment for Black people. They're talking about a Black president.
That's like a big thing to them. That means nothing to you.
Oh, whoever was going to be, whoever was gonna be
the third person was a black person for sure.
A hundred percent, no doubt.
Yeah, they saw you the way you wear your hat like that
and they were like, oh, he'll do.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Damn.
That hat, that sideways hat.
I think that's what I didn't like you.
That's a sideways, yeah, they thought you were condescending him with your hat
They're you trying to be I mean, I just woke up you put your hat on like a little tiny black kid
What's up everybody
Turn my hat to the side y'all
Turn my hat to the side because I look like a scrope
Hope you don't mind big J looks like a scrope
I just am not doing well
On the cabin with Berk Reyeshier Anthony Anderson D.le. So, play a little more. Can I just see uncomfortable head nodding, Jay?
Let's play a little more talk. Do you talk?
The kids. Maybe.
And I'll talk to my mother.
Oh, fuck you, Jay, when you're meaningful eyes.
I'm playing a piece of shit.
Oh, stop, go back, please, just fight.
And look at Jay trying to muster up fucking man. This means something you
Stanked right there stop oh
You suck
Jay sucks
Look at you. That must have been a really great moment
Yeah, I'm cool. I brought your children in the White House for them. For them to get to see that is really, if you told a little black girl in 1951, that one day,
a little black girl would be going to the White House.
I mean, Jay, you get so much going on though, you got a hat sideways, leasing the skanks.
Bracelets out the wazoo.
Fingilist mittens.
I got a fingerless mittens on.
Which doesn't make sense when it's cold
It's actually cold you could put the fingers back on
These guys know what the fuck to do with you and then you're fake meaning for face. Oh
Sometimes it's just time to listen
What would I say nothing I'd listen to a thing. Yeah, man
Jay you're not Jay's not a mouth. He's in ear. Yeah, I think people who look like me have talked enough
I think we've said plenty I think it's time to hear what you gentlemen have to say. Let me put some, take the cotton out of my ears and put it in my mouth.
Shit, time for season word cotton. I should have used something else.
Was it two races of a joke to say the other day were me and Christine got to that
rap concert late? Is that because I only recognize three fists of rap concerts?
You could take it on post if it's too much. Anthony Anderson wouldn't like that.
Oh god damn it. There's good reason why they hate you. You have five different groups of people on your clothing.
If they concern phase, it looks like I'm in the middle of a Billie Jean
helping me get my scooter back.
Yeah.
Oh, shit.
Really good.
I play more.
I still don't talk, I think.
Oh, this is brilliant.
I'm just here.
I'm just here taking it.
I'm not going to cry.
And this is not being honey on the table.
Like they're having tea.
Crying.
You're talking about crying.
Good.
My house and I tell them nobody, but I could not believe that.
No shit.
Yeah, I couldn't believe my mother cried too, because my mother was like, I'm in a White House.
Right.
To see that, to be like in the White House with a black president, I was, I was, I was surreal.
That was, that was, that was dope.
Oh, no, no, no, no! I was that was that was that was that was dope
That's Jay inside that's his voice inside listening to this shit
By this point by the rolping point I didn't want to make noise because he was doing that so big Anthony Anderson
That I was like I'm like I'll just be quiet and through just suffer through mine
And I think you know they'd be like some oh I can say something. Oh, back go back let's see them laugh what is it I bet it I bet it's something fucking I bet it's something stupid
I never thought about this it just probably why you did shit
well we're on the store with a super long tape measure. Run his neck. Now they gave me fake laughs.
Dragon like a bride veil.
Turn this off.
Can I go back if you look off?
I don't like this at all.
You got to look at this one.
You have to go back now.
They're still sitting around the table and they're cutting in and out from then
getting a massage.
But if you go back just a little bit when he just this one he was laughing.
Look at Jay.
He got the lat. He got the punch and then he got the tag. And then after that, he just a little bit when he just this one he was laughing look at Jay He got the lat he got the punch and then he got the tag and then after that he takes a little breath of
This isn't going watch watch right here watch watch his breath right one more right right here
Did you know what I didn't think I was gonna do as bad as it was I just go that's all I have for this part
It's all I got. It's all I have for the part we still almost see you
With that I'm gonna I'm gonna take my shot here now look up up up you were so excited you got approval
You was so happy they approved of you. I'm about to lay it out again about some some actual factual
This is about this is about seven hours later. Seven hours later, I
said this probably. Are you guys playing paintball? No, we're just shooting
Burt with paintballs. Again, they just show those two guys doing it. I'm
there though. You can see my elbow. Yeah, you can see it. You can see his, you
can see his nine different emotion and tattoo elbow. This is how I felt on
this day. And that's how I felt. So many emotions on tattoo elbow. This is how I felt on this day.
And that's how I felt so many emotions on that elbow.
And I felt like a star.
And then I felt like a loser there.
It does say useless in hell.
They like each other a lot.
They get along well.
I mean, they get along well.
Yeah, white man on the loose. They're not even showing me. They had they like each other a lot they get along well. I mean they got along well
They're not even showing me
That's funny that they it's just them again
47 I was there I'm being elbow. That's it. Oh, yeah, here we go
Just a little bit go back to that as much the the editor hated you. Oh, I mean no doubt
They probably were doing me a merciful favor. They framed you out of the fucking shot
There's only three of us it's a wide screen. That's a two shot. That's a two shot
It's supposed to be a three shot and they centered them in the frame
All these two is moved the camera over to inches.
All just do is use the crop,
the little button on the computer
and go, vump and go, vuh, and you're back in.
Like, there's a version of this,
where you're in this.
They wanted me, look, I have different goggles too.
Like, everything's wrong.
You don't have goggles, you have glasses,
you don't even have, they gave them.
I don't know if I have a gun. I say something else their outfits were given to them
That was a that's that's that's a wardrobe
They're wearing you're right. They're wearing
Wardrobes they don't he doesn't own a fucking that would see shit you're right
They're not to wear my own clothes the wearing swan sweatpants and sweatshirt and your own fingerless mittens
And my mittens.
And my mittens and bracelets in half.
Oh God.
This really was just cropped out.
You were cropped out.
I'm taking out of the picture.
Yeah.
I mean, shot it in widescreen, the three of you,
and you were cropped out on purpose.
Is this the first time you've seen this?
Yeah.
I'm shame.
Now I'm realizing what's happening.
I was there.
I mean, I was there, so I remember.
I watched the episode, but I just realized,
I'm like, you never watch this. No. Wow. I mean, I was there. So I remember that episode. I just realized I'm like, you never watch this. Wow. I mean, they are having a blast.
That's so much fun. Do they? But here's the thing they flew by. They knew each other for a long time before this. Well, they're on the show blackish.
Yeah. So they, of course, they're going to be. It makes sense. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it makes sense. I guess, but I mean, they could include you in the show.
They could try.
But me and if you're gonna fly me out, man, you know, you think you try to get me involved
a little bit.
I was dig through two black dudes from this show and then just some random fucking hot
topic trans girl in.
All right, Christine, don't over laugh. She likes some people give me the goods
I'm sorry
She looks for someone gives me the biz
Christine goes, that's good one Bobby, Christine will deal with you later
Christine goes to the nice black ozempic item
Alright, sorry I went to ozempic rage
Alright so I'm cut out of this You're cut, I mean you're edited out of it I would know oz epic rage
All right, so I'm cut out of this you're cut. I mean you're edited out of it. Mm-hmm. It's not like the camera It's so it's post-end with me and him wrestling. I mean, they're really not that good shots
Well know the ideas you're supposed to go around him. Oh, and make a painting. I wouldn't have done it
I was shot in right let's see if you see if I lace some actual factuals down
This time for 40, not.
Yeah, wow.
How old are you, Jay?
You're 22.
I think it's 40.
I'm here right here.
He ignored you.
You're like, wait, am I 40?
I'm a man.
He ignored you.
Go back to that.
Look at my face.
You ignore me, motherfucker.
No, you got just more interest in his life.
Jay, I have to be.
I mean, you say 49.
40, no, I say 42 you say 42 and they
ignored you yeah you said he asked me though he did ask you and they went right back
back to him again
how are you I just turned 40 now yeah wow how are you J 42 I think it's 48
maybe 49 up at those mornings you're like wait am I 40 you're not even there trying to wrap my mind around. Yeah, get some out
Trying to engage
My phone even works
It can't is up you could see Jay's eyes are going everywhere to get a connection with somebody
I don't know what I was treading water all day
But by the way, this is the crew the crew did this did my special. I know the crew
They want me in but but no one knows what to do with me exactly
I know they know it to ignore you. They're like let's exactly in here. I bet they had a conversation
Just talk around them. I kind of have a look like I meet like I made you go to like one of my friends weddings
And you don't know anybody and you don't want to be there.
I don't know what I got there. I was excited for the whole thing.
You just...
And then when we got there, I was like, oh these guys are not like...
He went, how old are you, bang? How old are you, bang? How old are you? And you like, boom. And they went right back to him.
He just goes, yeah, yeah. Anyway, 48 or 49 actually. Don't listen to him.
Wow. I mean, you, you you my friend started me trying to make I you would trying to make
I if you look at your I make like a shitty face look at his eyes. I don't even remember feeling that angry
But it looks like I look get shitty with D on cold. He looks sad man. You look sad. He look very sad watch this
Jay's eyes are going everywhere
How do you 49 47? How do you I'm just trying for it? J's eyes are going everywhere. How old are you? 49.
47. How old are you?
I'm just trying 49.
Yeah, wow. How old are you, J-42?
I think it's 48.
Watch J's eyes.
I thought those mornings were like, wait, am I 40?
I'm still trying to wrap around.
Watch here.
Yeah, who do I look at?
Where do I look?
Where do I go?
Where do I go?
Let's see if I jump in at all.
This is the round table like conversation again.
J was trying to make connection with the boom holder
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