The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Maid In Manhattan

Episode Date: May 3, 2023

Andy Fiori watches the family fight as Jay is upset with Christine's homemaking skills. ...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey everybody, I'm Bobby Kelly. And it's Big J. Okreson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just the podcast. Hey, guess what? For full episodes of the Bond Fire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bond Fire for a special offer. And now, the Bond Fire with Big J. O'Cerson and Robert Kelly. Killing Tom. Against all odds. That's the worst. Against all odds.
Starting point is 00:00:31 Oh my God, I hate you. Jo-M-B. Probably MVP of the league. Sidelined with an LCL sprain. A little worse than they thought. He's gonna have to at least sit game one. I say now, sit on game two. Because we have proved as a team. Can I get everyone's looking down here, are you looking me for a second? I don't want to.
Starting point is 00:00:50 I don't want to. One, two. DJ Liu, eyes over here please. Black Liu, if you would mind, heads up. Come on. When a team comes together. Oh God, he's doing fingers. His fingers are touching.
Starting point is 00:01:01 You see, 12 guys that put them to work together as a team. It's not about one guy who's probably going to be an MVP. These other guys, these kids, they dug down deep and they went up to the hostile waters of Boston where it's just wretched, freckly peep. Hey, hey, hey. Just horrible. Just a awful, just a gruffest woman. What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:01:30 My wife is from Boston. Just a nut scratch and broad. On Jesus Christ. No, not dawn, but the rest of those pigs. My mom is from Boston. No, but not her. My aunt is from Boston. Okay, she is a bit of a mess.
Starting point is 00:01:44 She is a nut scratcher. She's a real nut scratcher. Peggy is a nut scratcher. Yeah, I feel like Peg knows how to definitely fix or like resurface her own cabinets and stuff. Peg has a great. Peg, Peg's in the game. What a game. Did you watch it all, Bobby? No, I didn't because I'll tell you why. You're a little overbast. No, I was still, I was a little reeling from the bronze. Ooh, they got knocked out right. Dude, they got knocked out 59 seconds left in the game went to. Yeah, I will say as a fan of the opposing team in the Sixers Celtic series, I will say, but also as a human being felt the pain because they announced it on TNT.
Starting point is 00:02:20 I didn't realize that the night before was a home game seven in the NHL playoffs and they lost but they won so they're not they won the most games ever Really set a regular season record they set a regular season record really yeah the most games ever one They lost like three games in the year really? I mean not fast. That's not no they lost like 10 Yeah, like 12 crazy didn't Jordan have like a four-law season once. It's up. Yeah, I mean not that that's not no they lost like 10. Yeah like 12 crazy Did Jordan have like a four-law season once? It's up. Yeah, I mean It's like what the Patriots went 18 to no and then lost yeah, they're super Jones like 72 and 10 That'd be so that was crushing. I mean if they won that Larry Zonka was so thrilled about that 72 dolphins all those stupid e-troner. They were trying to do voodoo on the field Finish shitty to do voodoo on the field Fuck them finish shitty to do that actually
Starting point is 00:03:06 Why is it tough bronze loss? I was watching. I mean it was so yes So they lost Jacob the Bruins lost game seven so eliminated from the playoffs and the next night You're like this is probably gonna be a good night because the Celtics are full strength and the sixers are losing missing there the MVP the league probably, if not arguably, and they won. So it's like if you came, the big sports fan went to both of those games, and you're like, damn dude, that was a lot of wasted money.
Starting point is 00:03:35 I felt that pain in some of the faces. I was like, fuck dude. I bet a lot of these people were here for both. Boston's a great sports town, so they're in. That's true. And Philly is too, and I'll bet you the Celtic speed Philadelphia. What's the bet? All around you diving, you're diving all in. We just stole one at home. We have home field of advantage now. I say we win. All right. We have to bet something. I bet that if you lose,
Starting point is 00:04:00 you have to kiss my dead toenail. Oh, I might throw up. No, wait a minute, wait a minute, the right one. Is that the worst? I got a dead toenail. Huh? Why I have a dead toenail? Because they die. And they just stay? None of them stays forever, kid.
Starting point is 00:04:14 No, I'm sorry, me. And why aren't they gone? It's not finite. Enjoy your youth, son. Look around. Those trees are not going to be there forever. Andy, things die. Why?
Starting point is 00:04:23 Because I was hanging out in the New York sports club in the shower with a flip-flop. And I touched that fucking AIDS water on the bottom they never cleaned out. And I got a fungus back in 2002. And I don't know. There are solutions for this, I believe. Yeah, but the thing, here's the options. And I talked to Dr. Steve. You know Dr. Steve. Is it a needle under your nail? I won't take that. No, me neither. You have to either take this drug that causes like liver and kidney damage in some people. Well, you got a good run.
Starting point is 00:04:53 I'm sexy body, I'm almost back. I'm gonna give you a couple of years of this. If I get fat again, I'm taking the drug. If I ever get in the way I'm taking this kidney, he's the tonal drug. You know, my nails are gonna be nice. Or, and I didn't know this, I could just take the tone-out off. Right, forever. Yeah, have them go in, and they, what they do.
Starting point is 00:05:13 Jay, look at me, take your hands off your face. Jay, Jay, stop covering your ears. Jay, look at me. Big boy Jay, big boy Jay. Big boy Jay. Need you to be a big guy. Come on, big guy. You should be a big boy. Take a breath Jay. I don't think Bobby knows Bobby doesn't know my like
Starting point is 00:05:28 So I don't know I have I have a very weird thing to tell you Yeah, I can't like that should either dude, so you have to take it off now. Here's the thing It's not it's All right, so so you can take it off All right, so you can take it off because you don't need toenails. Did you know that? It's gonna be sense, no? No, you don't need to cut.
Starting point is 00:05:48 All right, Christine, it's understood. We know what's happening. Yeah, toenails are only for when we walked around barefoot. We needed them. When we were like cavemen and shit, we needed toenails to protect our toenails. You've never cut your toenail too short and then put a sock on?
Starting point is 00:06:01 That is very sensitive skin. And it's almost like a nerve ending when you take the Tonyo off it heals and that's just there. It's just it's just a tub nope It doesn't grow back you take it off and they kill it they I think they take it outside they take it out back They old yell are it yeah, they all yellow you They think it is old yellow. They officially introduced the show yet. No, I'm so excited about the game. It's the Bobfire everybody. I'm Robert Kelly. I'm Big J. Ocarson and our guest today
Starting point is 00:06:35 joining the show family. You know I'm in love with everybody. It's Mark Face and the Andy Fiori. Andy Special. Check right available on YouTube right now. Also follow him at Andy Fior Fury comedy on all socials. Headlining the Pittsburgh improv, noise. That's Thursday, May 4th. June 9th, 10th. City steam and heart-ford. Is that brew ha ha?
Starting point is 00:06:57 Yeah, brew ha ha. It's back, baby. Is it back? Was it always gone? Yeah, they were doing some weird COVID room. Yeah, and now the old club is back. It's a fun room. I've never played that. I heard it was fun. Yeah, they were doing some weird COVID room. Yeah, the old club is back. It's a fun room. I've never played there.
Starting point is 00:07:07 I heard it was fun. Yeah, it's fun. They used to have a micro-bury. Up the street, they had the old school radio station in a house. How did you do that? No, I never did that. It's a fucking house, and you'd go in,
Starting point is 00:07:22 and it was Connecticut radio. You broke your ass out of a garage? was actually it was like a living room and they but it was like the whole house was converted into studios and you'd go in and do morning Radio in this house. I think Stern was there wasn't stern there for a minute I think sounds right if I know my Where is it exactly? It's it's outside of Hartford. I think he did do a stop in a hard right right outside of Hartford And it was in this house and I think that yes, we're afraid I think yeah crazy little cool He didn't will Fred till later on but Detroit Right right yeah, right as we bet Fred. Yeah, he was alone up here. Yeah, I mean you do a couple old stern dogs
Starting point is 00:08:02 Students of the game did you hear him riveting with Pitbull today? He's so famous hours turn, they got a thrum that he's interviews that don't make any sense for Howard Stern to be interviewing. Today, he talked to a 19 year old influencer girl and was listening to her. He was like, I gotta tell ya,
Starting point is 00:08:22 I enjoy watching you put on makeup. He was like, I gotta tell you, I enjoy watching you put on makeup. She's like, thanks. They got flew me in a private jet to Coachella for guests and then old men went to fuck me and he's like, keep talking. Like, he just is so, keep talking. And then Pitbull was throwing him wacky. What is Miami stands, what does Pitbull say Miami stands for? Look that up. That's Mr. Worldwide, baby mr. Worldwide I know exactly like Howard Stern's like an old Jew who they just crowbar out of his house upstate new York out of his house Yeah, he was in his house doing the show forever and now he's in Miami Oh, he's in Miami now. He's having to open the studios, which is great. It's great that he went down But like it was almost like pit bull
Starting point is 00:09:02 Can you give a conversation I wanted to hear less? We have a pit bull channel if I'm not wrong Right, but I don't think it but they can't thrust interviews on Howard. They can't make him like That's this thing now he does interviews interview You know back in the game money is a major issue there it is gift saying and how it's like now when you say that What do you mean exactly like you just was so like I mean some major issue? Oh. Oh, what are you talking about? I don't even know if he talks like that Sort of he was like yeah, I open up a charter schools for other people I don't think he talks like that is Mexican
Starting point is 00:09:34 I'll tell you this I open up a school no, so all those fuckers can go to two other fuckers can go to school That's Carlos Mitzia. We're doing Carlos Mitzia. Hey fucker! Monty is a major issue. Oh, thank you. Carlos Mitzia rules. No, that's not... No, that's vote for what's in the Pedro. All right. That's...
Starting point is 00:09:53 So, we ever talk about the Carlos Mitzia thing? Did we? No. On the show. Which thing? You're plugging the... I think we did, didn't we? We did. He got a funeral...
Starting point is 00:10:03 It's my guy and he's plugging the... He's dating that guy. Yeah. that yeah crazy thing I've ever seen on He's like they say choked on his own tongue anyway come check me out at this day site either this weekend I mean in front of the funeral home with the funeral home banner in the background at the wake He's like my friend died he used to buy my kids shitty presents, but that's cool because that's right money inappropriate plugs He would never he go like super number over here. He's a good friend of mine. I'm gonna miss him a lot Please I really hope you come to the show tonight because it's going to be the best one ever I've ever done cuz my friends
Starting point is 00:10:36 I'm getting it to my dead broke friend chavis Clicked a link right. Right underneath the funeral sign. There's a link to click to get tickets. He was a good man, a good father, and I hope you all want to check my website out for all future dates. I mean, you're not exaggerating. And then when you come out after him,
Starting point is 00:10:55 he was like, it was the best show ever. And if you like the show, buy my RIP, Pedro, shirts, I have made up. Did you still do that? Did you still the did it? You still do that can't I want to be it's a picture of Pedro with the praying hands and angel wings? I also have candles with Pedro's facial See Pedro is on my merch page
Starting point is 00:11:16 Fuck it crazy. It was pretty wild. You gotta get him credit though. I bet he sold out that night Probably and it was the best show he's ever done size. Well, I'm just curls. I'm see you doing now I mean he was probably clubs. Yeah, I bet he's out that night. Probably. And it was the best show he's ever done. That size of home, just Carl's been seeing it doing now. I mean, he was... Comedy clubs. Yeah, I bet he's been. He was MSG for a minute. Comedy clubs, he's doing comedy clubs. And he goes in on off nights.
Starting point is 00:11:34 Yeah, yeah. Just goes in on off nights, Wednesday night, does it? He's getting a dough. Second show, third show on Saturday. He'll just do a, he'll tore it out. I'd have to guess 80% of his fan base couldn't give two fucks about the controversy Absolutely no, they couldn't care. I was not 80. I would say 30
Starting point is 00:11:50 Really a comedy club from fucking an arena Theater, yeah, you're always true laughing and livin Really is it what it defeated towards? He was getting by his one day, at one day the time tour. Laughing at living, except for my friend Pedro. He's still here. Oh, yeah, he's doing like Tommy T. Bananas.
Starting point is 00:12:12 Look, I mean, dude, he is not. No, no, no, no, go up. He's doing bananas and Rutherford. Yo, that is, that's a room in a hotel. Ballroom. It's a ballroom in hotel. But can I just bat? Can I just?
Starting point is 00:12:24 The lights are not that high These lights up here on our ceiling though the lights are low and they shoot With them as a dancer fucking silhouettes in the wall old Old bananas. I will stick up for old bananas. That was in a hotel crappy room crappy stage. It was better All some it was it they made that a comedy area. It was great low ceilings They packed it out and you would kill and it was great area. It was great, low ceilings, they packed it out, and you would kill, and it was great. The sound system was great.
Starting point is 00:12:48 This new one, it's crazy. It's on like the microphones, Tinney, like they don't have speakers. It's a pop-up. It's like they use the room, I think, for other things during the week. They should, of course. You can do that, and the old one did that too,
Starting point is 00:13:02 but you could get a good sound system so that the people can actually hear you do the jokes. Yeah, I mean also I went there after watching a riveting production of medieval times across the street, which was great. We had the black and white night, but we had to leave, I don't know if we won. I had high hopes.
Starting point is 00:13:20 He was really good at the rings thing. They probably archived the winds. You could probably go to the kitchen. I wanna go to that so bad the food is Next to inedible Not good at all and it's it's fixed menu. You're just getting the thing is a prefix and it's weird and it's like it's yeah There's a suit. There's a suit. There's definitely a no spoon. You're not supposed to use pencils, right? There's no spoon No spoon. I believe it's some sort of a
Starting point is 00:13:46 I'm gonna say boiled chicken. Yeah, it's boy. It's like it's It's not good. We were so bit this was a food look at the food many of you'll times in North Jersey Was the sixth grade class trip every year and we were so bad as a class they took our trip away I took it off and I've never gone back. I've never had the experience. I've never Never gone. No because I'd never got the field trip and I never got one back. I never went either Let's get we gotta go now. We go as a group Let's do me that once can we go? Sure, it's a medieval time, so let's go to eat after here's the feast
Starting point is 00:14:22 That looks good Jay It's not it's not good that looks good. It looks good, Jay. I don't think he just got to eat. It's not. It's not good. That looks good. It looks salted. Looks salty and they got chips. It's not good, guys. This is...
Starting point is 00:14:33 That looks great, that little rice medley. Okay, that's it. That's if you say your vegan, which by the way, you're starting to think I might go with the vegan option. I like the paleo. And the gaming is spoon. The gaming is spoon on this one. It comes in a pale. I like that. I like a pain the game you a spoon on this one comes in a pale I Like that I like a I like a pale of food. Yeah, it's my fat days. Yeah
Starting point is 00:14:53 I'm a trough a stuff They've already gotten the booze Well, that's your that's your breadwinner. So what do you get with the with the vegan option there? Okay? Christine the vegan option. Yeah, it's a generous serving of hummus with carrot and celery sticks. A man, a man. A man cores featuring three beans stew and fire roasted tomato and brown rice, which I did not know was available in medieval times. Fresh fruit and an Italian ice for dessert.
Starting point is 00:15:19 The way they did it. It really takes you out of the fantasy. The way they did it back then. The black knight is gluten free. They didn't even have Italians over here. It's not even nice. It's not even nice. The vegetarian option includes all of these vegan dishes
Starting point is 00:15:33 along with a side of warm pita bread. You know, just like the nights used to eat. They also, you can get a tomato bisque soup, hummus, Karen celery sticks as well as the main course of roast the chicken, sweet roasted chicken, sweet buttered corn and herbs-based potatoes. That sounds like a great meal. That sounds really good.
Starting point is 00:15:50 Go up. It's garbage shit. That's fabulous. It's more than unedible. That chicken. Can you go up for a second? The pale looks delicious. Is that chicken?
Starting point is 00:15:59 Is that what it looks like, Jay? That chicken right there. Here's the thing. Yeah. A big Mac doesn't look like it looks in the picture either A big Mac looks phenomenal. I know. I'm explaining you. You just might explain the fingers This is not good. It's really bad, but they make a good picture of it But I'm telling you get a side if you look to complete me
Starting point is 00:16:22 Okay, huh? It looks like Michelin star barbecued it look picture I don't go there Jacob that's all go to medieval times you guys go tell me how fans Here's the food is that you get four course meal fit for royalty and that little that little potato do you get that potato on the back? You get some yeah, not a potato. It's garnished beautifully. It's garlic bread. You know like medieval times That a lot of guinea's back immediately of the times. Oh, totally. A lot of garnish. Excuse me, excuse me sir, where is my garlic bread?
Starting point is 00:16:53 Before I joust, I need my ravioli's and garlic bread. If we were eating mutton, it would make more sense. And stuff like that. Dude, I'm getting chicken. I'm chicken, this boiled chicken leg. I'm getting that vegan bucket of shit And I'm eating that that looks fantastic. I want to explain to you Bobby that I think you're having a perception Issue here. Yeah, I think you're seeing that because it's got a bucket handle on it, right as way bigger than it is
Starting point is 00:17:17 It does look monstrous, but it's that's not that's not a big pot of stuff It's a it's a it's an individual. No, no, that's a good service. Dude, I look at the spoon. It's a good serving. That's a generous portion of actual. If you do scale it to the spoon, it does look pretty tiny. It's not big at all.
Starting point is 00:17:36 But you get hummus. You get hummus. You do get hummus and celery and carrot sticks. I'm happy with that. The way they did. For the great things. It's very authentic. Dude, I will. What's great also about the Jersey going to the one in Jersey is because they are doing like the voices, but it is still Jersey chicks. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:52 So it's like the princess really is like, yeah, you guys got to go out there and lance for it in me or whatever. You're gonna joust. You had a best chance to guess to suck your fucking cock in the Camaro. Hey, yeah, how else looks like you fucking shit? In Rutherford. It really is. I thought I was saying, like, the back room, when they're all dressed like knights hanging out afterwards, the actors, they're all two guys in the crew, two knights definitely have fucked the princess already.
Starting point is 00:18:21 Four, 100% for sure. They're drinking Yeager bombs. So old drink. for 100% for sure. Did you make it? Yeager bombs. So old drink. And all that. It looks like a castle outside of the building, but if a tornado came by, it's just the involves. That's lit.
Starting point is 00:18:32 That's an old DSW. No, we want the we need a rather fred one. I'm in, dude. Let's do this. It's do you get to pick where you go today? You did it shoes for you. They sit you and I think you just are assigned that one really okay Yeah, what is it black and white and then what maybe it is Linda is is Lynn Hurst next to brother for yeah, yeah Lindhurst is okay looks fast. I love relax North just get North Jersey Jesus
Starting point is 00:19:01 There on my bus every day, so I know North Jersey Jesus. I guess they're in my bus every day, so I know. You guys, by the way, Bobby had a whole crazy story happen this week in New Jersey, and Lou is such sludge garbage roots that today, a guy completely interrupted Bobby's show, Drunken. On the phone. A lady where Uncle Vinnie is. Uncle Vinnie's.
Starting point is 00:19:21 As I walked on stage, I looked over, he's checking the devil's cord but he's got the he's got the stats out. He's going through it. Not even like checking it for a second. He stayed on the phone looking at the highlights. Yeah. As um, as a mom. As I'm not even I just got on stage. Hi guys. How you doing? It's me. The guy you paid to see right? He's on his fucking phone, it stayed right. In the same fucking room, where Frisco and Felicia, from TV's young and restless, are going to be showing up on a Sunday for a photo shoot. A autograph signing, Bobby was almost attacked by Jersey shit. That's where Ariel took a beer almost to the head. Same club.
Starting point is 00:20:01 It's the same club. Not the club's fault. Not the club's fault. It's your local shit. And Lou knows that shit. And Luke and Elm's love he comes up today and he's making excuses. He goes, maybe the guy was black out, you know, like don't hate him forever. Dude, you don't understand. When the guy doesn't even know he's on planet Earth, it's not his fault. Yeah, you know, you know, you gotta keep over with the real like devil's fans. Guys, we've all been there. Well, you interrupt something. Make with a real like devil's fans guys. We've all been there
Starting point is 00:20:25 Well, you interrupt something make a big scene cause a problem cops get involved. There's a beat And then you wake up the next day you look that wasn't me guys Everybody's woken up the next day missing a fingernail of blood and scratch marks on the chest Tended in Jersey for like 10 years. I argued with a lot of people that were blacked out I'm just saying you know people that were blacked out and I'm just saying you were also blacked out Experience get a fuck out of my bar Fuck me Fucking bars under either right to a few service anybody
Starting point is 00:21:04 No sure no shoes no service It just happens to be your black Sure you'll be me actually your uncle no, I just I know it's Dino's name's me. No, that's right. There's no Vinnie I don't know why it's called not gonna fuck of any you don't know why no do you yeah? What is it because time people are stupid He called Tony Dan's is if Tony Dan's that came by once he doesn't give a shit I'm in I'm half a time Some of the work entitled couple goals
Starting point is 00:21:41 What are some of the work entitled? Goppa Goals? Hahaha. Gosh, you have bepe? Yeah. Stuff, shells, and chuckles. I like Dino's. Dino's a be a good name. Why not Dino?
Starting point is 00:21:50 Because it's not stupid Italian and stuff. Don't you understand? It is alcohol. Those are my people. It is alcohol. Oh, they still sell for a car at Walgreens for this very scenario. So by the way, I've been listening to new dad and getting affiliated with the show. New dad. Sounded great. I love it.
Starting point is 00:22:10 Thank you, buddy. But I have a couple notes that I wanted to bring up. Specifically, the Jays never let you still refer to me as ginger. Where I don't see it. No, you're not ginger. I know it. It rubs me the wrong way every time because you're putting it out there to the masses. Strawberry blond. You're strawberry blond. I know it rubs me the wrong way every time because you're putting it out there to the masses strawberry blonde your strawberry blonde the head but the beard but then the thank you defended you said better as a grey which I really appreciate it. Distinguished grey grey yeah I would say Sean Connery sexy thank you first of all you're doing a person big fan of your long hair I know and I've never said I'm really I'm just almost the shortest I've ever been I'll tell you
Starting point is 00:22:44 what a ginger looks like with long hair Christine you want to remind us all about that ghoul Danny Elfin real quick Also and now while we're doing that my other one is I really want a call name bad Yeah, I was very jealous of the call names. Yeah, I mean mark faces. That's oh no. No, you knew we need a newy Just you know I got one. I got one salt and pepper Salt and pepper salt and pepper no PPA I'm not really pepper. Yeah, I guess I know but I just like you had a call sign before anybody Yeah, that's true. I guess my face is good
Starting point is 00:23:24 It is I know that would fit on a helmet nice. We're gonna try in battle You only when you know if the call sign is good. We have to try and battle Jay you ready. Yeah, yeah Merkface pull pull pull face. Where are you? Merkface? Merkface Yeah, jambit it does work and it is violent. Yeah, fit it fit fit. We need you over here fit fit fit Fit it where you're supposed to be in my tail Fitbit. Fitbit, fucking rolls. Fitbit roll out. What was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was the, what was, what was the hot. We're learning hot Letters clear the jet way. We need the net
Starting point is 00:24:09 Some pepper. Where are you? I think salt peppers are right Well, she like let's just see what we're doing Just on the helmet call sign the letters call sign nanny. That's right Nanny we have we have Sky bitch I love looses, but you all seem to reject it. I thought it was dual dual two names two meanings trees
Starting point is 00:24:39 Trees now what are we give you talking about? What was the second? Smoke and and height. Smoke rules. What about just smoke? That's badass. I like smoke. But didn't we give you one?
Starting point is 00:24:54 I would want to be trees. Because of the height. You can't be trees bro. It's got a first wall. It's got a nice two syllable. Jacob, you may have the best call name of all of us. You can't choose it. It's like a nickname. You can't choose your own. Did they forget to the bottom on top gun of how they got their call names or the religious assigned? Well, I think you just
Starting point is 00:25:15 found out part three. Organs. Yeah, that would be awesome. Organs. Maverick was a maverick awesome or just maverick was a maverick goose had a long neck goose had a long Yeah, that's yet. Don't you think it was what it was? It was this downfall and he was half Chinese ice man ice like cold drinks I ice man was a totally flies cold blooded cold blooded, but okay, what you call it? I Think that's for sure. I think goose Anthony Edwards is like a long neck. I would assume that's what the the idea I never just put it in. We can Google it Keep it on picture Anthony Edwards. He's a super long neck Shorten neck you would have lived the Edwards long neck. Please. That was his neck after he hit the can
Starting point is 00:25:55 Maybe had a goose neck Then he had a they called him pigeon neck I'm gonna fly this I forgot Anthony Edwards is also now black basketball player. Do you know how funny it is that when he plays the combat Jet you really can't tell if the name works or not The right he's got a very long neck. He did he had a long neck not anymore though. Thus Goose Wow, he's aging rough. He aged quickly rough. Yeah. It was good for a long time. I mean, his hair went in it like a year. Like, he was in that spy. After this, he was in a spy movie where he played like a college kid who got
Starting point is 00:26:37 know, we came a spy. Remember that? Yeah. He's an ER for years. And they went ER, but when we went to E.R. he's re's balls he was well it is impossible not to look cool in a bomber jacket mm-hmm well what a white supremacist thing to say say what you will talk dock martens in a bomber jacket that's bad as that's his call name doc martens doc martens now that's too long like great best mark how about racist? Oh what's racist? We need you down here racist get down here you gotta shoot these nips out of the air racist racist we need you to cover smoke
Starting point is 00:27:14 racist where are you? I'm smoke need your help smoke need you well racist smoke need you right now more than ever you see one with the same smoke no racist will answer I on a phone call come in Yeah, that was a creative racist Smoke
Starting point is 00:27:39 Fitbit we We can't get a whole racist right now What do you mean what do you mean? I don't know I know he's out there He's just not answering smokey there smoke smoke smoke smoke Smokes like god damn motherfucker, you know, we I mean this is brief yeah, I was saying to Jay right before we went live This is a brief. This is a brief at all. This is something we should talk about Well, it means a lot to me. Let me just say I
Starting point is 00:28:21 Adore Lynn and Nolan. Lynn for Bonfire context is our... Spokes model. Bonfire Spokes model. Beautiful. Why do I love this couple? Let me taste them before you go, Jacob. I wanna make sure people's ears perk up.
Starting point is 00:28:36 Hey ladies out there. Listen to fuck up. You're about to learn how to act. Oh yeah, for sure. Good, Jacob, you have the floor. I mean, not only is a beautiful woman, I think we all agree, but Nolan is, he lives my ideal life. All I want to do is build, build stuff from my sweetheart.
Starting point is 00:28:54 Just got to building a house for her. He's building stuff. Jay, I'm right. You're not wrong. Well, let me. You're ideal life is a built thing for your sweetheart. I love that. I love lowlands life. Jacob, have you played Minecraft? But let me just say he keeps building his stuff. But Lynn, what kind of stuff is so he's building extensions to yeah building the extensions for the house entertainment centers. Yeah, the guys are the guy does everything for but here's the thing. Yeah, she's so appreciative. Look what you
Starting point is 00:29:32 watch her on Instagram. Look what Nolan built for me and it's not even the stuff he builds. She'll he'll buy her present. Like yesterday, she just posted no look what Nolan got me is it is it a Absolute what I think is a fantastic steamer vac. Pull it up Dude I saw this too. This one me and Jacob connected on before the show. What he This is something that the christine is the best if I got christine as a gift a steamer pet thing back vacuum She would a gift, a steamer pet thing vacuum, she would assume that I was being passive aggressive, I'm telling her to fucking clean her so Lynn is such a perfect woman so much better than you Christine. You did buy this for us and I was appreciative.
Starting point is 00:30:15 You got it at Costco and I use it. I use it more than you do. Did you say look what Jay got me smiley face? Make a grid. She grid she should In he would have been so mad at me if you look she says look at the words Bobby read the screen what it says Oh, and then Bobby then she shows the magnificent job it did you should see the before and after on this zebra blanket It's here you wouldn't even believe it was the same blanket. Can you click to the left Christine? She'll blanket Look at that Wow, that's a big difference. Is that a key key? My point is these two are the what a couple man. She's so appreciative of everything he does. He just does everything for and she she loves them for it. I agree. Lynn sent some
Starting point is 00:30:57 spread butthole picks to the show just like celebrate this. And there's that. I would like some maybe some boobs. Maybe some boob. If we can finally get boob and butthole on the same pick. Yeah, and maybe a little bush starts coming on that thing or whatever. I bought I bought don a high end vacuum cleaner. Mm-hmm. Like one of the best vacuums on the market. Mm-hmm. She wanted it and I bought it for us around $900.
Starting point is 00:31:21 And I bought her the vacuum cleaner and she almost cried. Christine, didn't she poorly hung it on the wall? for us around nine hundred dollars and I bought her the vacuum cleaner and she must cry. Uh Christine didn't she poorly hung it on the wall. She melted silver down and tried to pour it on your forehead while you sleep. Yeah. Steam this bitch. Yeah. I mean, she really should Christine does not show this appreciation when I buy her cleaning
Starting point is 00:31:42 product. She appreciates Nolan so much. If I started appreciating Jay on Instagram, he'd be like, what are you doing? No, I wouldn't. How would he do it? What are you doing? I don't like her depression. I don't like the impression of you.
Starting point is 00:31:57 It's dead on impression. I've been hearing it one more time. What are you doing? That's me. It's so me. It's so me. But. I knew you thought I said something online. I get so many. So many. But...
Starting point is 00:32:06 I knew you thought I said something online and you were like, just too much! But one more time, can I hear it? I'm here to do it. I'll get a joke. We're seeing if you did a big J one more time. Just do it too much. I lost it. You got it.
Starting point is 00:32:17 Breathe. Do one of my bits. Think of the breath. Ask them what they've ever felt before I got it. There it is. Do it too much. You ever felt it fucked black guy? And then you got to chuckle out your nose.
Starting point is 00:32:33 I can't wait to get your new teeth. So what's the vacuuming situation at the house now? It's a cordless Dyson and it's the one that I always wanted. I was very appreciative. I don't know how Jay needs to be appreciated. I vacuum eight times. You know, Christine, back. Eight.
Starting point is 00:32:52 That's because you want to back. You seem like you will take if something's dirty, though, you will just do it to have it clean. Yeah. But that doesn't mean she's lacking in her duties. Absolutely does. Why is it so dirty? I meant that they are so nice. Do you have a maid?
Starting point is 00:33:07 Yes, Christine tends to have them come in so she gets, this is what happens. Christine has the maid come in on a Friday when I'm gone for me to return on Sunday when I never get like the clean house. You don't get clean? Oh my God. One time she got it on a Friday
Starting point is 00:33:21 when I was, she got it on the Friday when I left for two weeks. Yeah, that's my life all Kristie That was bad timing generally she comes on a Friday Friday she can't come on sardis she's kids. There's nothing better than coming home to Made the best clean house minds coming to the weekend. It's like it's like getting a new house It's like getting a new house. It's like getting a new house I saw yeah, it's great. You don't smuggle I saw
Starting point is 00:33:48 I'm a shitty made it. I haven't made it She doesn't she's banished bathroom. Yeah, she's Spanish. She does not scrub any Reason you get it she doesn't you know, of course she does not do a good job Falling out of shitty made he would come on when she'd be eating food from his fridge not do a good job. Absolutely. Colin had a shitty maid. He would come on when she'd be eating food from his fridge. She doesn't do that.
Starting point is 00:34:07 I'm just telling you, she doesn't move anything. She's not good. That's not true. Might as me weird treats. Our legends work. Like just me. She brought me tamaleous. Yes, dude.
Starting point is 00:34:17 She leaves you meat on a steak. She leaves me fucking weird meats in Tupperware. Yeah, ours gave Christina tamaleous so she can't fire her now. Even though she doesn't even wipe down the windowsills Why the windows hills I made is me yeah, and after I clean my apartment on Saturdays. That's my time I'm never happier because it's that the cleanest it's gonna be for the week. I never get that Jacob You know Jacob Jay. Yeah, Andy. Yeah, everybody. I don't clean I don't clean I don't
Starting point is 00:34:46 Me neither never I do I've never picked up Christine's bitch me out now. You know what I I mean I I have a vacuum cleaner my own vacuum cleaner Because when I eat like crackers on the couch and stuff sometimes I get crumbs. It's called the dog The personal back. Oh nice. Come here doodle dog the personal Oh nice Doodle yeah, actual dog That's it. Yeah, that's what Christine also I said I said to my wife. I go listen Listen
Starting point is 00:35:13 Do your job Christine doesn't do a job. I go I was really do this way you say go like this go Christine Look at her look over Christine Christine now a little more attitude Christine Christine. Hey look at me I Have I've got people online I've had I've seen people online say shit about me like oh Christine's a sloth She doesn't clean anybody's ever been to my home knows that I keep a good home. Yeah, it's just crazy Is that me crazy? that I keep a good home. Jays just crazy. What does that mean? He's crazy.
Starting point is 00:35:45 You're crazy, Jay. He's fucking crazy. I clean, we have a maid, everything gets wiped down. She dumps a bunch of food into the sink, and then she throws things in the dishwasher that I've provided for her. And then I have to take a napkin because for two days, she'll just leave all the food in the drain things sitting there.
Starting point is 00:36:05 You got to get it out with a paper towel, I know it sucks. And it's what the way I did today. J. Grant? Today. Sorry, I couldn't watch dishes today because I was talking about your album all morning. Fair. That's fair. It is fair.
Starting point is 00:36:22 I got your work. I love me and Indy. You can just go back to work. That's fair. She's real. Wally Play Jimmy. Why do you ever want you say something? I want you talk. What you eat something Why don't you say something? I do not pay rents. Yeah. Oh, you you my uncle's very proud of me You do you do pay rent you do with sweat equity. She does is does, it's the point. Sweckity. Thank you, Annie. Making that a way funner word to say. Sweck, Sweckity.
Starting point is 00:36:49 Sweckity. Sweck, Sweckity. I do love the word, Sweckity. I gotta say first, I do love the word. Love that word. She is not giving Sweckity the situation. She's giving a lot of Sweckity. No.
Starting point is 00:37:00 Sweckity in all day. Did that Italian upstate New York? No, Sweckity. No, Sweckity. She gave it a lot of Sweckity. She She was squected in all morning on the album thing. That's my... I had the name of my next album. This is how Jesus called me at work to tell me
Starting point is 00:37:14 that the corner of the bed is untucked. That's fucking crazy. Your crazy behavior. You're a fucking mental patient. You're a mental patient. You're a mental patient. Why are you like, who do you think I am? I'm the MDF. I just shined on every call me at work ever again
Starting point is 00:37:29 to talk about the best. You made Navy SEAL J. Yeah. That was not the last time. That was not the last time. He's a frog man. You took that corner and you hear me, Brian. I'm sorry to tell everybody what you do. You're an expert talking to corners.
Starting point is 00:37:42 That's the way you do. You're a squirt in the end going to get you this far. Chance it wouldn't live like that. That's the same. Everybody what you do Shanks wouldn't live like that And you're that's from Jacob not insane. It is insane sure Jay has mental it's not just me guys. It's insane. You got a your common dear She's common dearing show military words dude. She's got a Squickity That's not a squectity. I'm a big fan of the word. I like the word a lot favorite word. She doesn't have it. Wektady No
Starting point is 00:38:13 Christine the corner of the couch thing where the corner of the bed when she made a bit she's talking about something I Took a picture of it I took a picture of it. It's crazy. You're not doing yourself any shit. Well, is it a recurring thing or just, there we go. Now we're getting to the bottom of it. She goes, she'll be, I make the bed like, first of all,
Starting point is 00:38:33 she would sleep at the time way longer than I did. So she would go, I make the bed every day. And I go, you shouldn't suck your own dick about that when you do a poor job of it. I don't know if that's in a book to a marriage relationship thing. Tell you why if you don't suck your own dick about that when you do a poor job of it. I don't know if that's in a book to a marriage relationship thing. Tell you why if you don't suck your own dick over it. That's fine.
Starting point is 00:38:50 Better for Mars, Winter for Venus. Yeah, this is chapter 12. Don't suck your own dick about that. I give Christine a lot. I have to reform. I have to remind Christine often to not suck her own dick about something. So does Jim Norton. Listen, I don't suck you on dick. No, no, no, no, no, I mean for real. I'm doing it.
Starting point is 00:39:10 Please do it, do it. Listen, let me say something. You have to let me explain. I'll explain. She just gave you her bullshit things. He called me. She called me at work. That's that's a that's true. Giving you a part of a story. Okay, go ahead. You took a picture of a story okay go ahead you took a picture of a bad corner though that's crazy because she sucks throwing dick and says I make the bed all the time I go you're bragging about a thing you don't do well like you don't make the you throw it together every day oh no no no and then so I would tell her I go I'd bring her I go you think it's like amazing like it's simply tucking it in I don't even I don't need tight hospital
Starting point is 00:39:46 Corn you tuck it so it's not Like like let us out of the sandwich What are you the fucking hampton in sweet my friend? I would tell you I taught her hospital corners. I taught her how to talk Always happy you gave them to or you forgot them perfect every time you shouldn't get a call at work about it You gave them to or you forgot them perfect every time you shouldn't get a call at work about it In heaven if it's heaven if it's not even done right once let's forget perfect every time Let's say it's never done right one time Um, and so I just so you want you want things tucked in you want when the beds made you wanted to look
Starting point is 00:40:18 Really made I've had to really I've had to really learn to cope with the fact that there's a lot of Metaphorics sweeping under the carpet in my life I've had to really learn to cope with the fact that there's a lot of metaphorics sweeping under the carpet in my life. Christine does not give a fuck if a sheet's tucked in and like tight underneath. She just pulls the sheet up and then as long as the comforter looks fine. That's the way I make it. It's fine. Right.
Starting point is 00:40:41 She lives like a fucking like a 45 yearyear-old batch man in Mark phase of your Good room. Can I say something though when you make the bed? It's your you're not a hotel no one else is coming in you just throw the people do come in who comes in Yes, who never see this right-tag group are you kidding me? Why are they coming in your room? It's a New York apartment the room. He can a little tour. It's a newer place. Go ahead, take a look around the apartment. Nobody does that. Nope. When somebody comes out of the city too long. You're not having city swar is anymore. This genuinely, in a four bedroom house, in a four bedroom house, this doesn't bother me so much. In, in tight quarters for a long,
Starting point is 00:41:22 long time, tight quarters got to be nice. Jacob, I know you're sort of on my set on this Robert Kelly bonfire. Seriously, exactly. You have a question? Yeah, long time, listen to second time caller. I'm saying this, Jay, as long as it looks neat, the sheet is over the top. The pillows are where they're supposed to be. And the comfort or duvet is on the top in a organized fashion. You don't need to talk. Yes, that's insane.
Starting point is 00:41:52 What's the point of doing all the rest? If the bottom's gonna be like, it's all about looks. It's all about aesthetics. Well, you can talk. You can talk. You can talk. If you're having a party or something of people might go in there, but you can talk.
Starting point is 00:42:03 But if it's just a regular day, who makes the bed every fucking? Yeah, I don't want it hotel time. Me. Why? Then you get in and kick the sheets up again. I make the bed every day and might be called. Tell would be as a child. I don't even get a message.
Starting point is 00:42:16 Nobody. You know, I heard as a little boy. Jay looked at my fingers. My fingers are together, man. Jay, look at me together Jay look at me Feel great. Isn't it great to talk like a powerful? It's really powerful You are heard as a little boy and those corners need to be tucked in so what you feel safe
Starting point is 00:42:36 Not at night you feel safe in the morning the afternoon all day long little J.J. Feel a little PPJ feel safe those corners of tucked in and you know what she she didn't tuck them in so what happens you don't feel safe but Jay guess what she wasn't worried about my safety she wants me hurt she she's worried she's worried about you safety she wants you to live without a net Jay Christine's got you look at my fingers Did it gather you giving her excuse to be lazy? Let's see. Oh, Jay. Christine's just living with that a net is all this.
Starting point is 00:43:13 Jay, Jay, look at me. Jay, Jay, look at me. Look at my fingers. There they go. They really do command the tension. She's got your Jay. You can fall. She's got you. Okay. She has my start to say what is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What is this? What And say honey you have sweat today. I will give you for your work all the royalties if my soon-to-be-released gas digital Crowd-work album that never came out 25 Dollars How much is the date? You know I made I made my bed every day before jay came along. Why you sexy are be singing
Starting point is 00:44:02 I'm like a fucking professional Why are you speaking? I'm like a fucking professional Organizer, come in. One day he left town on a Thursday. You know, I make that bed every day I come in and I feed the dog and I walk it and I get him cigarette and I get him weed and I get him a Starbucks and then I make that bed. My name is Christine and I have Swetady baby. Swetady coming out of my titan. My name is Christine and I demand respect from my man, from his friends and all the people on the bone fire. Swetady is the name of the game daddy oh and I'm here.
Starting point is 00:44:37 All I'm saying is bitch I got you the vacuum vacuum. And what I'm saying is maybe we don't like we don't need to vacuum twice a day Paying for the clean I'm paying for the cleaning lady. Let me reap the benefits once in a while For the house is completely covered in dog hair We we we are having a fun time. Yeah, does your cleaning lady bring you homemade coquitos? What is a no what is it a unopened old cragu's bottle? No, but you know some kind of treats I'm getting she does have to be told to dust the furniture Or she thinks that's not part of it my cleaning lady brings two girls. She is a best I mean I walk in that house it feels like a brand new
Starting point is 00:45:26 house here's the problem with my brain smell like cleaning stuff in my house here's the problem with my cleaning lady takes my stuff and puts it places so like I find stuff I found something a year and a half later that I was looking for and I tell my wife and I go don't where's my stuff we get put it I didn't fucking put it anywhere I left it on the my stuff? Where did you put it? I didn't fucking put it anywhere. I left it on the table. I don't know, you put it somewhere and then I'll find it in like a draw like a year later with a bunch of wires because my cleaning lady thought that this goes with
Starting point is 00:45:56 technology and wires and this goes in the store. I am never that angry. I'm getting angry. I think this fucking tequila bar, I've seen her fucking folding laundry before. I'm like stop clean stuff Stop That's a killer barrel Jesus Christ Jesus, please tell me to marry She's a person She'd be out of my life She'd be out of my life
Starting point is 00:46:10 She's so good, our friend who loves clean stuff recommended her to us. I don't know what you do. Is it Finoa's marry? The cleaner is not clean enough for you The cleaner is not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm not good. I'm so good our friend who loves clean stuff recommended her to us I don't know what is it for no is Mary the cleaner is not clean enough for you cleaner because my good I'm telling you what it is Michelle our friend Michelle is one who recommended to Michelle has to hire people that can deal with Michelle's Crazy thing she had Our housekeeper in Los Angeles literally it was like a like a they were frenemies Los Angeles literally it was like a like a they were frenemies Like Michelle like fell and hurt herself in the shower one time and she was calling out for the for the maid who just chose to not help her No, come Brenda. Yeah, she was shooting like a TV show He's the fucking maid from family guy. No, she was like. Yeah, she was just like she laughed it off
Starting point is 00:47:02 She like laughed at the does she and her daughter went to go get Tuesday nights the maid that hates me So I know that the show's gonna get people who could do so this lady is probably just You could tell her whatever and she just let's it roll off her side. Why don't you dump her and get a new maid Why don't you eat man up and say hey your done Chiquita Benina and we're getting a new made get a new one Christine her are somehow best friends it turns out I think we have the same cleaning woman but Christine's blown away by the fact that if she made a bed at our house She probably would tuck the corners in wow Oh my Mary makes changes the sheets and makes the bed so probably different my wife I take care of that on my own
Starting point is 00:47:38 You don't take care of it on your own the whole point hey, Jay. Yes, then you voice down Okay, but put the fingers together for me. And through your nose, out through your mouth. Okay, in through your nose, out through your mouth. Now, talk to Christine with respect and dignity and know that she has squared. What is it? Sweck withy. I'm not going to talk to her like she has squared. I'm not going to talk to her like she has squared.
Starting point is 00:48:04 No, she has squared. The the secret? I'm not going to talk to her so she has, what's the secret? The same. Sweck withy. Sweck withy. As we're in front of it. Sweck withy. Sweck withy. Stop showing your intelligence.
Starting point is 00:48:11 It's a sweck withy. We get all agree. I'm not going to speak to Christine like she has earned sweck withy in the department. You're throwing a cue in there somewhere. Sweck withy. Sweck withy. Sweck withy.
Starting point is 00:48:24 Sweck withy. Sweck withy. Sweck, sweaty. No, sweat, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty.
Starting point is 00:48:32 Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty.
Starting point is 00:48:40 Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. Sweck, sweaty. right you you gotta give a little sweat that he yes action speak louder than we have for for the uh...
Starting point is 00:48:49 she has to get you going i think the thing is that i put a thing i think he's me going to pressure points so sorry christian i apologize for my outburst questions for j jigger your thoughts here's one i i feel like
Starting point is 00:49:04 i have an excuse I have such a tall mattress. I can't tuck tuck in. That would be a horror for you to get it in the mattress. What the fuck? How is it not more? How is it not easier to tuck in? Because that's at your arm level. The sheets, the bed is the mattress. I don't know how I got it. It's like a princess in the P mattress No, I'm saying the high Comfort couch height of the mattress. It's so tall. Jacob. Do you have to run to get into your bed? It's tall That's why Jacob's not in pussy these kids get his bed. It does look kind of silly when I get
Starting point is 00:49:45 Because I got to go like this you go. I got to hop on them It's I got to give a little push off We're gonna get we're gonna get you a tall girl to help you and your bed That's hard to do. I love the mattress, but it's tall. So here's the thing Yes, because of the height of the mattress. It's like literally that The sheets and this is a regular big big sheets Was it a queen? They do not tuck under because the height of the mattress is too much So what what do I do to buy bigger sheets? They make cheese for everything Jacob. I wouldn't show
Starting point is 00:50:16 It's not a talking for the it wouldn't court. I can't talk the sheet under It's not the time you can't talk to under, but it's gonna be show it won't be showing because your comfort is gonna come over That is your bed right shaped in like a car. No, but you put the sheet over there the lip of the computer right by the pillow Is it a race car? Nice mattress Yeah, go do a rope ladder to get in this thing. It's a tall sleep. Yeah, why is it going to be a rope ladder to get in this thing? It's a tall it's a home mattress. You got a running started Superman. Yeah, do you have a desk under your bed? Jacob does. Jacob does his homework for the show under his bed. I just realized I got to kind of
Starting point is 00:50:56 do a little push off the floor to get onto my mattress. That's great. If you got a girl in there, that's right. No, you wouldn't know. got it to scratch or something. I make it look cool So throw her down if you fly that's gonna hurt Jacob has a He has bumpers on the side of his bed. I Don't know what the what kind of sweat what he is this when I fell out of our bed I don't know what the what kind of sweat what he is this when I fell out of our bed Make your feet. I fell out of bed and I landed directly on my ass bone on the hardwood and I'm telling you I it took my breath away. I was having like like you know
Starting point is 00:51:36 I got my arm noises. It's not I just came down directly like ass and I was going oh And I was going oh And she was like what and I was like Christina Christina that was a chance to build up some sweat with you right there. She went back to sleep while I know She was half awake because I had you pull myself up on the bed like a wounded vet Like I just like I made a decision. I was like no one's coming to help Come up to get myself out of this. It's important on the 4th of July I pulled out two desert Eagles and crawled out and get the Ron Covec you
Starting point is 00:52:10 I was and I'm telling you as loud as I could going And she just she was like And she just she was like, I don't know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:52:26 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:52:34 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:52:42 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. But the lip, the right by the pillow, you fold a little bit of the sheet over the Christine wouldn't do that. So what you're saying, it pops up when you're sleeping and you move around. That's annoying. To make it in the morning. Oh, just you live alone. Don't even fucking know why don't you get what I'm saying to If it was Jay, something would have to be done. Get a taller person to come in and tuck in the sheet. Yeah, come over every morning. She's tall enough for this mattress.
Starting point is 00:53:06 I'm sitting up in this man. What size matches you have a can? I know. What do you got to know? No, it's not the length. It's the height of the mattress. Who's going to pen? I get a pen.
Starting point is 00:53:14 I do it. Now, blackwoods go on in here. Hang on. You do this. I got this for you. She has a, Christina's a video running of how to make a hotel bed. I make hospital corners. There's no way I do this every day. We don't need that. We don't need that.
Starting point is 00:53:27 Here's why you have this tall bed. Here's a bad. Okay, my mattress is maybe twice as tall as that. What do you want on the screen? What was the origin of this bed? Yeah, what is it? It's 1700s. Okay, here's an experience.
Starting point is 00:53:38 Are we all looking at this? Here's a bed. Yes. Okay, if this is the comfort that it's over the whole thing right now, that's what you would see essentially right is it's a Comforter Okay, the comforter coming down doesn't matter where It does not go over the mattress. Your confidence to come back. It's what it is. It's way too small
Starting point is 00:53:53 You're a tiny comforter or a giant equinox. You need a you need a big the bigger the one that queen size mattress, so I got queen size Fitting yeah, but the mattress is so big. No, you need a king-sized comforter. You just get a bigger height. Yeah, that's what you need. So yes, I would argue your bed probably looks like shit when it's made. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:14 But the fitted seat just a seat of them. I couldn't get a king-sized fitted seat. But we all agree this looks fine, right? This looks fine in the most basic of levels. I like the comforter drape. Christine would have These things happen is that make it happy There's truck nuts of sheets coming off your bed make it happy
Starting point is 00:54:33 Where is it make you feel like you should take all the sweat? What do you think she has away? Wait a second now. Yeah, wait a second now. I see the truck Sure, look at that. Yeah, it's like the lettuce coming out of this fucking sandwich. Okay, but I got claders like it now. I think you need to get smaller sheets. So it doesn't hang over so much. I'm not sure what it's to tuck in. It's to tuck.
Starting point is 00:54:56 Yeah, I'm gonna tell you what you gotta do, Christine. Move out! You gotta, Jason, take that back. I'll take it back. I'll take it back. I say that you take your finger and you just one time on each side Swoom down and it goes up oh 95% of the time 95 it's done well, can you do listen?
Starting point is 00:55:22 90 I got a If a fucking corner is coming out of the bed and you see that my expectations that he'd go Christine missed that and you tuck it in and I would literally never hear that By the way, that happens 99% of the time that's codependent That's a woman stuff right there. We're like if I didn't do it. Why don't you do it yourself? That's just fucking tuck it in if it's out. I do a lot of the times But some point you have to go are you just not doing it under the idea that I will fix it every time? You fucking psycho I do it Christine's last comment is making me come around the J now Thank you. Yeah, if I let her talk you gave away your tell always bigger on
Starting point is 00:55:58 percent of the day I do it 225% of the time as your as your lawyer Christine stop talking 225% of the time. As your lawyer, Christine stopped talking. She gave away her tell. Yeah, you can't, you can't, you can't, you can't say that. I expect to do something wrong and you'll fix it. I learned how to do the thing right. I know. When you're interested, you take the stance.
Starting point is 00:56:19 Jay, if you see my fuck up, take care of it. Crazy. What about clothes on the floor? If you do have something laying on the floor, does the other one pick it up? Same scenario. I don't think clothes on the floor. All right.
Starting point is 00:56:32 Steano putter stuff all over the floor. But, no. Jay, Jay, it's a microphone. We all, we all, we all, we all, we all, we all, we all. We all have phones off. Yeah. America. Kristina, put her clothes off.
Starting point is 00:56:41 Let me just give a fuck. Can you think, you think it's an attack plan? It's an attack plan itself calling me a work of the world. What's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, what's your, a fuck. Can you think you think it's an attack in himself calling me a work of the world? What's your, what'd you say? I said you think instead of tucking in in himself, oh that's not there. What was the work I called you? I think you lost the room, Christine. What was the work I called you?
Starting point is 00:56:56 Christine, as your lawyer. No, we have to take a break. Wait, what was the actual, what was the work? I was working with Rebecca, it wasn't like I was a... For the love of God of Christ. He was working with her, it wasn't like I was a... For the love of Gov. Chris Stevens. He was working with Rebecca! And that is work! We do what he had to do.
Starting point is 00:57:09 Chris is the comedy festival called Skankfest and just because we were working in her office doesn't mean it wasn't work. Oh, I guess that year Skankfest was a little less because you were able to put a little more effort in the Skankfest because you don't tuck in the sheets of it. Wow, that makes sense. Hey guys. Oh, that makes sense. Hey guys, this is the bonfire. We're going to take a break. We'll be back in the sheets of it. Wow, that makes sense. Hey guys. Oh, that makes sense. Hey guys, this is the bonfire.
Starting point is 00:57:25 We're going to take a break. We'll be back in just a few minutes. With closing statements, closing arguments. Close arguments. This is Big J.O.K. or Cinema New Special Dog Belly Life from Skankfest out now on YouTube. Scott Fulton, PJ, O.K.S.A.
Starting point is 00:57:39 Scott Fulton, PJ O.K.C

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