The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Nick Fuentes-Extreme Virgin
Episode Date: December 6, 2022With Jay in L.A., the gang deep dives into Kanye West's pal-extremist Nick Fuentes. ...
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On Big J. Ocarson, I'm Dan Soder.
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And now, the Bonfire with Big J. Ocasin and Dan Soder. Well, I got down on my, on my, on my bendin' knees.
Can I hear me here?
Yeah, I can.
What's this suicide soundtrack?
Ooh, why'd you ruin the soul?
Damn, Lou is so excited to play the movie version and Christine just...
So packing an exciting California dream in and that shit coming along.
I've never seen one upon a time in Hollywood with a great Brad Pitt.
Yeah.
Yes, this is from that.
Well, yeah, but it's such a bummer one.
The people in California are upset about it. Yeah fuck California. Yeah come back to cold sad
I
But fuck off How about that fucking pussy? How about that? How about that? I saw her on
What interview on bar stool and she's like still that girl?
Yeah, like with all the filters and stuff. She's still she's like you crazy
Oh really, yeah, and he's like oh you bought someone a big house. She's like, huh?
She dumb is shit. She's dumb is shit. So I hope she saves her money. I love that she has a
Scholarship makes me laugh. Who is it?
Her name Danielle Brajoli. Oh.
She was on Sunday conversations with Caleb.
He's very funny.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's very funny.
Is he making fun of her?
Kind of.
To her face.
But he's like asking like, you know, he does that with people he interviews, whether it
be like her or a Hasbola.
Oh, is everything been lit since you've gotten famous? Everything's lit, dude. her or a Hasbola. A little guy.
Has everything been, has everything been lit
since you've gotten famous?
Everything's lit, dude.
I'm lit.
Is everything mad lit?
I'm lit, right?
Mad lit.
Sponfire, faction talk, series XM 103.
Can we go back to that clip?
I want you to hear where he says he's never been
with a woman.
It makes me laugh.
We're talking about Nick Fuentes,
BFF of Kanye West. he's been showing up on podcast
with a man.
If imagine being in like, like you're Jay-Z
and you go to talk to Kanye and this kid's there,
you're like, Kanye, you gotta get on your bed
and this kid's like, well, actually.
Hey Jay-Z, get out in the field.
Really?
Whoa, what?
Go, have you been in a relationship with a woman?
No.
So how are you telling other people how to behave towards women, will you yourself have
not had any actual physical, you know, interaction with them in a romantic capacity or in fact
in any capacity where you, you know, uphold them in a way that treats them with respect to
mean if you're out here arguing that women are basically half the value of, well, you know,
I'm not going to put words in your mouth in fact because that's not right.
But you know, if you are looking to some other regimes around the world that do think that women
are half the value of a man, I have to question what kind of a person who's had no experience
with women is in a position to basically promote these ideas.
Well, I'm having an experience with a woman right now.
I've had lots of experiences with women in my life, not romantically, per se, but I've
talked to enough women.
I've known enough women to know sort of what's going on
And I think any man who is observant enough and honestly, you know, like I said, we could go back to
Great East, we could go back to people who've been a guy who's still probably I don't know what his background is
But like if his father's just this kind of guy and says the kind of stuff, you know, I mean he's just like blindly following someone
He's never even like hooked up with a chick before he smelled a lot of hair. I've
I've felt warm toilet seats as I've had
strategically in the bathroom. I
smelled my aunts underwear in the laundry. I one time my mother threw her brazier on the floor and I scooped it up.
He's like, I've lit leave it to beaver was a white supremacist. Yeah, He's like, leave it to beaver. Was a white supremacist like this.
Well, G. Walsh off.
G. Walsh, Patrick, their white supremacist.
He's like, G, Walsh, they're only three fifths of what we are.
Hey, why is the help talking to me, dad?
Yeah.
He's the only guy that we did in that old mean Joe Green one.
He throws the Jersey back at him.
Don't touch. Don't touch me. Yeah. He's the only guy that we did that old mean Joe Green one he throws the Jersey back at him
No, don't touch don't talk to me. Yeah, this guy
Usually like white supremacists are like you know bearded men with guns and shit and they're like
Oftentimes now they're like suit and tie guys
That's what I'm saying. That's new vote. If they're nothing else, so they're adults for sure. They've busted a nut in a lady. Like, how is this guy getting traction in that world? I mean, that's crazy. A 22-year-old.
22-year-old who hasn't fucked and people are like, this is the guy. How did he get linked up with Kanye?
How did Kanye?
linked up with Kanye. How did Kanye?
Oh, may have something to do with that because it's in Kanye's big thing. What's one of his also like little side projects is saying, uh,
horns destroying everything. I don't know. That's right. Sorry. That's a big thing.
He has, although I will say this, uh, it's going to sound weird probably to
people who like know my comedy, but I was watching, uh, the SNL from Saturday
last night. Saturday night.
I got here.
I got here.
And like, I get a little bummed out.
Like, they have a lot of like leeway now.
What do you mean?
And it's like, there's a lot of like that instead of like,
like great characters or long, you know, like,
like recurring characters.
There's like, they can really like,
there's so much dirty stuff on the show now. What do you mean? I mean, they try to get away. What was the other thing like to characters, they can really like, there's so much dirty stuff on the show now.
What do you mean?
I mean, they try to get away.
What was the other thing like to keep saying
P word for pussy on something?
Or they kept saying it.
Sarah Sherman, who I think's really funny, by the way,
did a thing about, because they're introducing
another wacky situation.
They're introducing apparently gay,
a gay couple of female polar bears.
For Coke on Peppa Pig.
Oh, Peppa Pig.
Peppa Pig cartoon is gonna have gay,
lesbian couple polar bears.
They just are not fun to hang out with
and they only talk about New York Liberty basketball.
They're just like, oh, hey, get out of here.
Sorry, we're Lesbo Bears.
You're, you're loud straight from male friend really upsets me.
We're going to go grow on each other.
You're just growling at nothing.
This is Lesbian Bears.
But anyway, the beginning of the joke is that she thinks it's like two guy bears.
Yeah.
And like, and she has like two pictures and one's got like, you know, it's like a stick figure
bear basically with like a wiener and the other one.
She's doing a thing where it's like hitting the other one like in the butt with it.
Yeah.
It's fun.
It's not.
It's not funny.
I'm not even arguing that the humor is there. I'm almost like
Let down a bit by like oh, I thought like the
One world was supposed to be the one world and the other was you know, you had to go like it's still like when I hear on
Basic cable now they can say fuck and motherfucker and all the shit
Like AMC shows I thought they could say shit and ask I didn't realize that they got to fuck
Basic cables to if you want to I mean, I don't know what the thing is or what the rule is ultimately, but they get, yeah,
all those like, FX non-stop cursing.
And it's fine.
Again, I don't care.
I'm not offended by it anyway.
I'm just like the breakdown.
I'm like, well, what's the good?
You know what I mean?
If this is like the underground kind of dirty stuff,
what's the good stuff now? Like they're taking all the good stuff,
getting perverted in its own way, which is weird.
I mean, kind of like rely on SNL to be like,
you guys gotta be clunny.
edgy, you know, I mean like edgy humor for sure.
quote unquote, I hate that term, but you know what I mean?
Like, you know, but it's, uh, it's gone to like I said,
it's almost like every, like they have full sketches about like Drake and shit, you know what I mean?
That was on this week that like, I don't know.
Not getting it.
Are we just old?
Absolutely, but I think the, uh, the humor of here's, now I will say this.
I think the earliest of SNL's are corny.
Yeah, like 70 75 to 80 does does nothing for me.
I jumped in where I really was like, this is great.
For me was around the Dana Carve.
Yes.
Same.
Phil Hartman, all that era and it was great.
And it was like wholesome is the wrong word.
Like head wound Harry and she loved had loved head wound Harry.
Love me to
love this Harry used to make me laugh. Honak Harry is great. All the I mean the church lady ones
were all sexual and you endos. They never like said the thing but they always reference sex in a
way that was like but sprockets fucking I had a lot of ways. Obviously. Yeah church lady and it was
like it was I said it was like the time it was. So yeah, but it might be age where the subject matter
But I mean the shows like uh, I
Mean there's a hip-hop song parody every episode now. Yeah
That was kind of that was kind of Pete's specialty before he left. You know, it's being the rap video
Right now it's like because remember laser was in the rap video when lonely island did lazy Sunday
That was like did never done that and then it was like oh they'd do it once every like five or six weeks
And then you're right now every episode is fucking
Yeah every episode's got that but I want to know like
Who hook Nick Flint has up with Kanye West?
Who's the guy in that? I want to know, who hook Nick Flintes up with Kanye West?
Who's the guy that's like,
hey, multi platinum artist, Virgin 22 year old.
That's why it's the premises.
It is great that Joe is having to be there going like,
I don't know, I heard Tillers.
He's got a bad guy, he's got a bad,
I mean, you know, Sandy Hook didn't happen.
He's like, I love the Nazis.
Like, I love strong word.
I think you're in heavy like with them, you know, but right now, I don't think you
really know what they're doing.
Yeah, it was funny to see Alex Jones be like the voice of reason a bit.
Yeah, him being the cool collected one.
When he sweats and takes shirt off with Kanye wearing the mask over his face,
the whole interview.
Oh, how do you take that seriously?
Yeah, dude, if we should do that, we should do a whole episode dress like Kanye,
where we just hide our faces.
Just green man costumes.
Yeah, just a whole time.
I'd be like, I got a whole my mouth.
It's very hard to breathe.
It's very hard to breathe in the sink. Yeah, just a whole time I'd be like I got a whole my mouth Christine war veil for the Jan Michael Vincent. Oh, yeah
RIP air wolf going but I forgotten
You know the people die since we've been going
Shots will die since we left since you left in New York. Yeah
Wednesday now no one died this weekend no one of notoriety that I can remember Bob from Sesame Street
No, who
What was he using his nineties
uh... white
that's vague
why is everything in the color with you
well there's a lot of different people on set
which given us too much for this
is that like that but like
does there's something of him being like racist they say white supremacist
why like
i'm sure there are
ton of videos.
Someone on Twitter put up a video of him dropping the end bomb and he goes well that slipped out.
He said it slipped out. Yeah, you like said it.
Cut up about the votes and he goes well you're getting the votes and he goes well that slipped out.
No, promise me again it's almost my point.
How do you take that seriously?
It's like so like there's something so much like larger of a problem there Oopsy poopsy didn't mean to say oh
Don't care who you do Negro
Whites so Nick point is Kanye West white supremacist associate is filmed hurling a soda cup at customers inside an in-and-out burger
Okay, all right. Love it. Live it. Love it.
Here he is.
Let's see.
Oh, it's black and up.
These black dudes are having to hold themselves back.
Yo, I believe he's a white supremacist just for having the and crazy just for
doing that.
What he just did right there.
He did it like he thought it was going to be crazy thing to do for this little weener
Yeah, man, what if you can fight what if he could you before this goes viral?
All right stop yelling
It was Nico. What up? Yeah, what up? Sneko guys name is sneko. No, it's here. It's sneko has to say about this
Sneko was over the Twitter. Yeah, your thoughts. Sneko your thoughts
Sneko break us down first Make this make sense to me.
Sneakle, let it loose.
Let this thing rip.
Well, I know this is gonna look bad on Nick Fletzaz.
You can see him throwing a sprite in the in and out.
But if you look at the ceiling right here,
you see there's ketchup all over.
That's because some lady in her husband came up to us,
flipped us off, and then threw the ketchup all over me,
and Nick, mostly Nick, I just wiped it out of my hoodie,
and he retaliated with a sprite. That's actually what happened. We were attacked first
and we told him to go away. They went away. This is Nick Frenz's boy.
I was going to be against it. It's a his span.
Oh my god. Damn, dude. They're like Nick, they're like Nick, you fucking crazy, bro. You
fuck it. You love these white people too much. How what does white supremacist mean?
I don't know
We've said it too. He's talking about Kanye and he's like he's saying
Preaching white supremacy and I'm just like it feels like white supremacy should be called something different if you can be a white
Supremacist if you're not white
Like I doesn't it feel like it's you get along with
With like he's like I don't know like
He goes I'm sorry to tell you if you like Kanye West
You're not a white supremacist
If you like with them
Dude this fucking guy is this the most bummer thing of like the I have black friends
as the excuse for you to be racist.
And you're like, yes, it is the reason.
Look, that is the actual, the actual excuse reason why.
Yeah, I mean, this guy is a white supremacist,
but it looks like he hangs out with people of other colors.
His best friend is a black guy.
It looks like this guy is just an anti-semitic.
I get so scared to win this.
It's just because the way that they've been used on skanks,
that whenever anybody's called a Nazi or a white supremacist,
I'm immediately like, I am immediately like,
what are they saying?
Looks like that old Gomez last name,
Golden Ticket don't work no more.
So, oh, welcome.
Well, it's a, well, it's a, those Jay Gomez, the Nazi sympathizing or whatever.
The article was the best.
Well, Nick Fontes is a dork.
We'll find more videos of him being a dork.
We didn't watch that Trevor Wallace comedy.
There's a video, I think it was him because i saw a video of a guy talking where
he says that he's actually less gay
for being a virgin and a man who has sex with a woman now that i'm like looking
at him i got sure it was him it had to be so i'm going to try to find that
video he's saying less gay because he's never been with a woman that is
jet eye level of trying to fucking turn shit around. That is insane.
He goes, you know, actually a pussy on your dick is probably the guess thing you can do.
You know, a pussy pulling come out of your penis. Very gay.
Fucking chick. Gay.
Dude, if I'm Nick Fuentes, if I'm Nick Fuentes and I'm like talking all this shit,
you better be worried about the first woman you hook up with then my just wait and roll you
Yeah, a lot of people think I'm gay for fucking Christine
That's just her voice
What Jay oh yeah give it to me. Oh me. Oh
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, Oh Open up for it
Love a soap you're about to make me come
I'm gonna go I'm gonna go take a dump
I gotta scratch my balls
I'm gonna go air it out in the bathroom for a minute. Oh, you got pussy just all over my balls
Why am I turned on and I'm not wet? I'm gonna go try to cleave out some of this Loub. Oh, hey, you really shot a flugian there essay.
Louie. You really fucking spitting me there. You fucking camel.
No, they're real longer. You really hawk back and fired that one in me
Should we watch should we watch Trevor Wallace's comedy so you can write some roast jokes
Stripping out down my leg roast jokes
Roast jokes. Yeah, guys give me some Trevor Wallace. Jacob's hacking into the system. Do you like that camera angle is?
Jacob's typing
I have a cool story about the loss of virginity.
Oh, was it while they were filming the Titanic?
What the fuck happened?
He's like, no, Jack, I can be like, let him go.
I don't know.
Step wrong, stuck in the glacier.
Okay, as a guy, that's going to be the worst place of fuck ever.
It is so cold. So, it's usually guy that's gonna be the worst place to fuck ever. It is so cold.
So, it's so much bigger than this.
It's...
We're just in the Arctic right now and...
Is she either one of like fucking Arizona or something?
Check up loves it.
You said the last thing men are pretty hunn.
Sorry, I thought somebody said something. I said, Jacob loves this shit.
I said, Jacob can't get enough.
It's cool guy.
It's cool guy energy, Jay.
Pure energy.
You're going to have to out cool them.
I love all of it.
But who is this?
This is for the roast.
He's hosting the roast. He's hosting the roast of Burt Kreischer.
Oh, are him in Burt close friends?
I don't know. Nothing makes sense in Ella.
Nothing makes sense. Burt's closest friends aren't on this.
Is there a guru who's not on it? No. No, Joey D is not on it.
Rogan?
No.
Ari?
No.
No.
Who is on?
Jay?
Jay, he said it.
It's all over the place.
Me.
Hinchcliff.
Riverwalls.
Hinchcliff.
Rachel Fines time.
Whitney Cummings and
Bert obviously.
Bert goes, so this roast is people that I call twice.
It's not the first call.
I call them, they call me back roast.
Dude, just make fun of that.
That's probably what I'll riff on,
is that none of his actual friends are here.
Yeah, dude.
This is clearly, and it's on only fans, right?
Yeah, I want to point that the last few times I've seen
Lessons of a scene Joey Diaz and him in our act. It's been joy. He's just leaving him constantly
That
You should do some Ferrari just get one in
That uh, you should do some Ferrari just get one in
You're the last one. It's like it follows you have to get rid of it
I got a ass black Lou. Yeah, dude. You ever done acid on the bus ride home
Because you know, you know black. Lou. It's funny. I didn't know you got wet. He goes what?
Hey, yeah, yeah, I think I'm ready to grow a commercial
Hmm
Oh Oh no. Oh no. Oh, this is true. More.
Oh, oh.
Uh, the roast is tomorrow.
We're trying to get you back.
Roast tomorrow night, right?
Roast is tomorrow night. Yeah.
You're gonna do great, dude.
We'll see.
We'll get there. You're in a fucking kill it, bro. I'm giving you LA energy. You're a do great, dude. We'll see. We'll get there. You're in a fucking kelet, bro.
I'm giving you all the energy.
You're a fucking man.
You already fucking have it.
You so have it.
Just do it.
I'm like literally in awe of you.
You have it.
Now just unleashed on Christine.
Why are you having this battle with the sun?
Just go somewhere else.
I can't move it.
You look like you're in a teacher conference.
A parent teacher conference, you're hearing bad news about your kid.
Yeah, you're so upset.
You're like, I know it.
I know he wasn't going.
I know he was cutting every day.
Oh, you're telling me he pisses his pants every time?
Ah, son of a bitch.
Oh, those kids in the kitchen, he just like his father.
Son of a bitch.
This is Christine's.
Looks like she's taking a shit. Dude, I saw something
while going to Houston, which by the way, so much fun, man. A lot of people did the Houston
in Austin, the whole Texas tour of the Bonfire. We got to gather those pictures up in
Santa Matyshirt. Yeah, we got to get some stuff. So, Blackloo, we got some addresses for
you and some names we got to give because there was a lot of people that were coming out to both shows.
Harry Fennel, I think, Mario, I think it's very good. Yeah, I think it's Barry because in between
shows, it's in between Houston improv shows, you know, you've been to that club. It's kind of tough
to go out there and talk without shit getting crazy because it's like the next show's seating
and the old shows leaving and it's like if you go in there
But I did after the late shows got to meet a bunch of campers. It was fucking fun dude
Houston improv is a massive room that usually stinks in that room fucking rules
It is a great room like I yeah, yeah, I'm seeing it. I was like, I do this is gonna suck and it was fucking great
But you did new cap city for the first time is very nice. Oh, yeah, the new cap city. How was it? So funny going from it. It wasn't like the most like,
cedeest, creepiest mall, like strip mall ever. Yeah. You know, mostly by like a
Johnny's buffet and a hand job place. Yeah. Like right next to it to now. It's in like the,
next to like, you know, like a Kendra Scott and a Louis Vuitton store and Lululem it's like a high end they moved to the main it's a high end strip mall that has actually
apartments above it which is kind of funny. Oh that's crazy. But the hotel's in that mall. Oh that's
fun. Z even walk right to it. It's two minutes of a walk yeah. It's these push-up in that holiday
in that was down the highway and you had to fucking be like how am I getting to the show.
It's these putch up in that holiday and that was down the highway and you had to fucking be like, how am I getting into the show?
And it was just on that it was on that creepy like road like dark
Business center behind it and you're like, am I gonna die?
Flying to Houston. I'm in line
TSA pre-check
Older couple in front of me
They have backpacks, suitcases, and jackets.
They get to the conveyor belt where you push it through the screening machine.
They don't even get a third of the way to the screening machine.
They just put their stuff up on the belt and then go through the metal detector.
And I'm like, that's a fuck.
I'm the one behind them.
I'm like, what the fuck?
There's a giant gap between where their stuff is
and the machine or whatever.
And I looked at the T.S.
It's just like it's on you.
Yeah, to move forward.
Yeah, and I looked at the T.S.A. lady and she goes,
fuck that, go around them.
And I took my stuff and I put it in the machine
and then I went through and I was waiting for it.
And the lady was like, ah, well I guess this guy the machine and then I went through and I was waiting for it and the lady was like,
uh, well, I guess this guy just went and cut us
and I went, no, you didn't push your stuff through.
That's wild that you just left it there.
Like, that's, I go, lady, that is crazy you did that.
And she goes, um, I do that every time.
And I was like, then you've never flown before.
You've never gotten your stuff through security
because they just left it there and they were like,
oh, someone will push it through for us.
It was fucking wild.
And then she acted like I was crazy.
She was like, oh, this fucking asshole cutting us.
Yeah.
The airports are back and they're back as bad as ever.
Ralph told me a story on SDR show last week
that it still makes me furious on his behalf.
He was coming home from Portugal. Yeah,
you know, just banging those fucking otherworldly sluts. The geese just going to the geese out there.
Just going down to the port getting Portuguese. Hunane getting geese, but he was coming back on his
flight. He sat in his seat and he heard them like page his name. Yeah.
And he went up to them and he was like, yes, whatever.
And they go, yeah, is there a reason like you?
You have to put your suitcase in the upper,
in one of the upper things, you know, whatever they're called.
Yeah, overhead bins.
Overhead bins.
And he's like, yeah, you got to put it in.
He's like, oh, what?
And he's just, so he was on the floor
Like goes on the mid in the middle of the aisle his bag and he was like I had it up in this bin and the there's like an older guy
In the seat that would just as he goes goes that's my bin above my head. So yeah, I took it out and
And there was also a no he took a couple people's things out it turns out ultimately
And there was also a, he took a couple people's things out of turns out ultimately and
damn
Ralph's of the other guy was arguing with him a bunch, but Ralph that he just more kind of laughed it off and whatever which Ralph did probably do the right thing
But I was like he kept saying like how do you think Lewis would have handled that and I had to say probably like I would have
Like because he was like you know, he Lewis J Gomez would have like lost his mind on that
I was like, yeah, but so would I have yeah, I absolutely would have been I would have been in a thing with that guy. There was a there was a they were
like going to escort me off the plane for it. I would be I'd make even a bigger stink
because I go that's fucking crazy. Like this guy should be taking off the plane or so.
That's why that's a very aggressive move. Just dump someone's luggage. Yeah, to take
someone else's stuff and move it out of an overhead bend is fucking that's a war move. You're ready to go to war. If you're doing that, I move things over and
that's whatever. If you move things over, that's fine. One time there's a guy.
It was really the only space was the entire thing above him, right? And on both
sides, they were full. And I put mine on the left side. And I was like a row or
two back beyond that whatever and this guy goes
Um, that's only for this row and I went no, it's not
It's for first class, you know, you just you could put it in there and he goes it's for this row
And so I took it out and I moved it and I go is that okay?
Are you are you feeling okay that I moved it and he was so mad that I was giving him baby voice
Death throughout the flight
He kept looking back at me with his wife and at one point I blew him a kiss and I've never seen a man get angry
He was like
Like that and he was like oh cuz I was like fuck when I pulled my suitcase
I did call him a fucking dork I pulled my suitcase and I go here. I'll move it you fucking dork and he was like
Oh, he was like a 55 year old white guy he was just
like oh I used to be so cool I would have said it's up there and if you touch it or
if you pull it out of there I'm going to open hands slap you on a plane that would
have been cool that would have been like cooler I think it's fucking crazy I would buy
with I've been watching this shaft documentary thing on HBO Max I didn't know
that check open hands slap knocked out Greg Oster Tag in a locker room once
I didn't know that either from the Utah jazz pretty great documentary. Yeah, yeah, it's pretty much the last
I forgot that him and Charles Barkley had a major major fight once and they worked together every day on a TNT
Every since they did the Jordan the last dance
They've just been going back through that era and then following like major basketball stars and they're like, can we do another
last dance?
Because they tried it with Jeter called captain.
And it just ate shit.
It was like they tried it with Montana.
One's a four bar.
It's great.
Shaq one's been great.
No, yeah, I'm going to watch the Shaq one because Shaq is one of my favorite players of
all time.
He's funny as hell.
You're watching it, Luke. Yeah, I'm gonna watch the shack one because shack is one of my favorite players of all time. He's funny as hell.
You're watching it, Luke.
Oh, yeah.
I thought he was the most interesting part of the, the Lakers official doc on, uh,
Oh, the one that didn't make him look bad.
Yeah, on Hulu.
The one where there is, to me is, yes, it's confirms that the series was accurate and it's a political ad.
Yeah.
Cause the one on Hulu, isn't it like,
hey, there's one problem, Laker Nation, it's loving championships too much. It's like,
oh, it's not drugs and pussy. Like it is everywhere else. It's not fucking sex and drug
and drugs and power. They're like, no, not where you say? Okay, that's, I don't want
to get too far off the airplane thing. So I want to see my airplane thing is I got on the plane feeling like garbage
Yeah already right and I go to kind of curl up in my seat
You know go to try to sleep for a little bit or something and the or I was gonna watch so actually I'm watching clerk's three
Roodle I heard it's I heard it's a tough watch. It's a drama. It's like, I don't know, man.
It's a drama that once in a while they have J and Sun
and Bob come in and J and these have J say lines
from all the other movies.
It's really weird, weird flick.
But as soon as they start taxing,
the second they start taxing,
or I'm sorry, as soon as they're not taxing
when the stewardess is sat down.
Yeah.
And you know, there's usually about
like five, six minutes or so before you take off.
Yeah.
The lady in front of me, this just, I,
I can see her face when she came in,
bitch face, late 20s probably.
Ooh.
Big tits, chubby girl, but,
seething with confidence.
That's, and, uh.
And, uh,
and, uh, and front of me and she fucking
As soon as we started that this dude was sent down she just cranked her seat all the way back
All the way back basically you're worried the TV screen just all the way and it wasn't now here's the thing
She does it when we take off and we're moving like fine. I hate I still think it's a dick move
But okay, what are you gonna do? You know, I mean?
It is you know, they make it so you can do that because she did it like then I just spent the next like 15 minutes
probably
aggressively
Driving knees and moving that chair all over the place. Love it
And then she eventually when she set forward. I just, she wasn't doing anything. And I went, I go, miss, is it possible to move the seat up a little bit like I'm
just tall and like, it's literally on my knees. And she like without saying words, just
like, you know, uh, turn away through like moving it up a little bit, but fuck her.
Yeah. You're crazy move them. But before the plane takes off, like, this is how it's
going to be all four hours. Yeah. And you can't, listen, if you're going to, if you're going to recline the seat,
you can recline it a little.
I have to.
Sure.
What, Jacob?
I have to warn you all because I think
whatever last remnant of civility on a plane
is going to be leaving soon
because I think all of them are going to be getting starlink
which is, they're going to,
everyone's going to have Wi-Fi capability on every plane
during the flight.
So I'm, I'm, I'm fearful that now you're gonna have
people FaceTiming for six hours straight next to you.
Man, he used to be so great on the subway,
where you would go underground from Astoria,
when you, and you watch everyone's phones get cut off
because they're gonna be on the phone,
and now you can just be on your phone underground.
And now that's gone.
Oh really?
It never goes out.
Now, now barely goes out if at all.
But now picture you're sitting next to somebody who's face time,
forced to shut it off when the flight starts, but now they're on the whole time.
Dude, I get it.
I texted you guys this, but I don't know if I ever talked about it on the bonfire.
That lady that was watching Kevin Hartz insta stories in laughing in a way that immediately made me think she was mentally ill
She's like
Sitting next to me. I forget where I was going. Might have been Cleveland. It was Cleveland
I was flying to Cleveland and this lady's like oh
Oh
We done did it again. Oh my god. Oh my god. And I looked at its Kevin Hart's
Insta stories and you're like those are the most corporate things in the world because
he's like okay. Now Nissan decided to come on in and he helped me out on my Chase
Capital card. It's never like actually funny. Now he's just a now he's just a
advertising boom. But she was laughing and then dude I was reading a book and she kept
going what are you reading? And I was like I was reading a book and she kept going what are you reading?
And I was like I was just this book, but she kept being like who who wrote it?
And I'm like I'm not giving you a book report lady
Finally she went like when I go to concerts I go a little crazy
I'm going to see my favorite Japanese rock band tonight. I was like dude. This is fucking wild
Rest of the flight. I just acted asleep. I just put my head hat over my eyes
And I was like this is fucking crazy
But she's nothing worse than a zany bitch.
She goes right.
Her laughing at the Kevin Hart Insta stories
was the immediate thing where I was like,
there's no way they're that funny.
Even if they're kind of funny,
there's no way they're that funny.
But you know, he's also,
I thought he would conquer to every medium,
but now apparently doesn't audit an audible
conquered every medium, but now apparently does an audible story, like an hour long, like monster story. Like I think he has a series, an audio, like an audio show. It's not a book.
But he does like horror stories. I think it's a horror, Kevin Hart's horror stories on, but yeah.
And I think he's the, do you see? There's no, there's no stories on but yeah, and I think he's the there's no
no
J at this point is he just doing stuff for his like I'm gonna do I am I got a new
corn podcast
you're telling me
with the fuck it well yeah I see these audible things I remember like when I
come into the Lincoln tunnel there's always a I think audible has a billboard
out there and it'll be like Zachary Kinto and somebody else starring in but it's an audio book.
Yeah, so it might be like a horror film that they do as a podcast because I know they're doing that shit.
So weird. Yeah.
Yeah, but Kev's just like, yeah, I mean he's got bottomless money, dude, and he loves the Jews.
He ain't gonna say, he's for him to bring on.
He chimed in it all. He isn't say, for him to bring God, yeah.
And he tried and did it all.
He isn't trying to do anything with in regards to.
He tried and when he tried and did on the Chris Rockwell Smith thing is my favorite.
What was it?
What hurt?
Yo, this one hurt.
Because Jesus brothers.
He's a friends man.
These are like best friends to me.
I would love if you got like that famous
where you were just so phony about it,
or you're like, oh Chris Pratt, you my boy man,
why'd you have to go and do that?
Instead of just making fun of whatever they do,
you're like, oh man, it hurts.
Dude, it is the funniest.
Having a new famous best friend
is one of the funniest things in the world.
You gotta understand, he's different now.
Well, it's the audible originals.
Same as it, I'm gonna go call Marty real quick.
You're like who? Like Martin Jean.
Oh, okay. Oh, cool.
You know Bobby, Bobby would actually laugh if I said that to him.
Bobby and I got lunch yesterday, Robert J'Nero.
Yeah.
He goes, oh yeah, because I'm gonna tell Bobby that when I see him.
I told you, that's what Keith Robinson while I thought he was
fully shit the first time I met him. Because I was just I forget his name and comics and I remember
uh you know some of Jim Brewer I said he's like ah Jimmy Stink you know he's busting balls
yeah. He's like ah Jimmy Stinks ah comatil con. When next time I see Conquan I'm gonna punch
him in his face you know. Yeah. Okay. Sure you know you don't know any of these people
at all. Yeah. I bet people I mean it's funny because we've been doing the show
Seven and a half years and Pete's never been on and we've talked about him ad nauseam
And it's funny that he's never been like I'll come by the ball fire
It's like I've never been I've never been garried by a friend so much. It's it's pretty impressive
He said he was gonna come on the show probably over a dozen times every time I see him
When he was at SNL he was like well right across the street
Can I come over from SNL and he'll even he would even say shit like well, I was no excuses
Cross the straight
Yeah, I mean, you know
That right there is the move here like how did we fall for it so many times? Do you remember when we found out that he would text us
the same thing?
Right back there.
Is that a little modern-ly?
And then you text you.
Is that a little modern-ly?
And then you're like, damn, that's like a stripper run
in game, dude.
Who's modern-ly?
Is that a guy?
Are you modern-ly?
You don't have a talk to him anymore.
Someone's modern-ly.
Who's modern-ly?
You can listen to the Audible originals, Kevin Hart reads monsters and how to tame us. Who's my own right? You can listen to the audible originals. Kevin
Hart reads monsters and how to tame them. That's it. Is that a kid's book? I don't know.
But it's getting that kid book money. He goes, all right. Now, bam. Open the book. All right.
Boom. Now the monster's hungry. First line. Oh, monster. Muscle loves each other. Bam.
It's a little girl. All right. I'm looking at the drawing. Look at this, she's black girl.
And she got picked out.
Bam!
Bam!
Next, Muscle comes out.
Muscle is under the bed.
What the?
Oh shit.
Bam!
Um, let's uh, let's take our last break.
So I can go take a little siss.
Thanks for listening.
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