The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Painting Ebony (feat. Andy Fiori)
Episode Date: November 30, 2022Adult star Ebony Mystique poses nude for the guys to paint her portrait! ...
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And now the bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Dan Soder.
Uh, yes indeed.
Our crew is never here.
It's always depleted.
We had to bring in, we had to farm in some old talent. He was on a farm
Posting he was making offense and I and I walked up behind him and I said we need you back
There's like Scott Bakula brought a Texas University
Must have got back you'll back for necessary rough. Anyway, I don't do radio no more. I don't do no more
Radio no more do no that's not best thing anymore
Jack of in Florida Christine's spinning around somewhere who knows where is she oh she's behind me. I know she's in the studio
So sitting in with us today everybody one of our favorites to have on the show you know them in love It's merc face himself Andy Fiori
Field the fear new special check right. Yes. What up fam go watch it on YouTube. You'll watch you'll watch it fam
Watch it fam. I like I even get more hip hop lately. Thanks dog. I've been really noticing about you
I go straight up dude. Thanks. Yeah, I go Andy's got an urban vibe. It is fun
It's a talking that kind of vernacular. It is I would say a yo to something makes I think I sound cool
It makes a great the word I hate the most is bitch bitch doesn't never do it for me
No that Urk you during breaking bad
Yes, yeah, Jesse was heavy on the bitch. Yeah, it really did someone anything the sentence in bitch is it seems forced
Yeah, it doesn't even seem re you know something
Bitch
You know that's what I said bitch
Where the fuck is everybody?
Hard day here no one cares about the show anymore damn damn dog
Jacob's okay. I like that Jacob's hunting iguana
Jacob's down there going for a war right. Oh, thanksgiving. Okay. That's makes sense and it's Florida Thanksgiving It's like Greek Easter. That's a week after the original. Black glue's gone full blow to fantasy football.
He just spends all day calculating stats.
He's in there.
He's just in the room.
He's got a core board that looks crazy.
He's just beautiful minding lineups together.
Yeah, he goes, dude, he doesn't even play in the league anymore.
DJ Lou here, he's in a good mood too,
because I believe him and his lady had sweet sex
last night too, a little song called,
I Saw Red by Warren.
Nice.
Here goes, hey, Jamie, this off- off hated comment about me kissing down your belly.
And anyways, I just want to put the song on.
Let me kiss down your body.
Take off your top.
Hold on. Look at this.
Look at the little arch of your hips.
Take your top off.
Now take off your underpants.
We're here.
I come.
We're back.
Take off your bloomers stand up.
Turn around and bend over.
We're Brett Michaels on last night. That was listening. It's pretty great
Flip the room
Well, I was always again shit talk aside. It's Brett Michaels
It's it's an icon in music to me and I do as I was able to tell when we went on a commercial
I remember like when the the girl who was watching was an older
cousin actually like showed me look with the cat dragon the first time I thought
it was four chicks on the cover because they're wearing the actual makeup.
Yeah. And and they were beautiful. He was so nice though. But he was. Yeah.
But yeah. So you were like, ah damn and he also is pretty cool dude. Good.
Good. Good vibes. You get you. It also the humor of like an old rock star
and like that at that point, but he was,
he was cool, charmed the pants off the room.
Christine said he could have got it.
Blue gave it to him.
Really?
That's where Lou went.
Black Lou went left.
That's why he's in a good mood.
It's not his chick.
It was the fuck man city field on the,
not his, he told the, he told the, he told the,
he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the,
he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the,
he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the,
he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the,
he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told the, he told DJ Lou that he's back this up. He goes you like the mitts? He goes I know the other you know what want you guys? Well, I'll get you down on this
Cohen
He's good friends with Steve Collins. He's friends with somebody what kind of him for a date
He just saw my met hat. Here's the thing
I'm a text you we're gonna get this done. Here's what Brent Michaels does for Lou
I don't know if it's gonna actually happen but Brent Michaels came in and he gave Lou
I don't know if it's gonna actually happen, but Brent Michaels came in and he gave Lou something to believe in. You're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, you're going to gang, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, pling, plingy plings please dude. That's how it was pay great. That's Steven Scott I thought you think he's fucking Peter Frampton and now frampton. He's not Winslow dude
Oh, you see how that works. Oh
You see that
Yeah, you're a trained musician fuck you. Oh, yeah, can I just I love the Jacob. Yeah drop. I say it in my real life so much
It's here. Can I can I tell you my one note on it?
Hit the hardest. It definitely hit the hardest.
Yeah. That drop hit me the hardest without it. Yeah.
Let me tell you, and I love it. It's one of my top five favorite drops of all time.
My one note about it is it was much more effective on Zoom shows,
because it was recorded on zoom
So when he hits you on a zoom show with it. It sounded like the first time he hit that drop I thought he actually was saying it to Jay
And it was a time of doing it. It would be so rude. Yeah, he hit it. Lou hit it one time on Jay
And it got me where I was like I'm losing it. Yeah, it was great good pop
I'm a great job. I'm it. Christine. That's a short idea
I'm gonna put that up
Okay
Yeah, okay
If Michael Winslow is the king of voice-rementalist and Stephen Scott is the Duke. Oh, yeah, oh voice-rementalism
Yeah, yeah
Dude, you know I saw last night. He showed up and this is
Well, maybe we should have her pups be call in
The last night to stand after the show. I was waiting for
They asked me just a little interview. So I was waiting outside for a few and
Walked up to me. The jolly cat, bro. Wow.
What?
Told me that I would be very excited.
Ironically, he kept telling me,
he started the story three times,
and all three times went ironically,
and I don't know what's ironic about this.
He said he's doing a roast thing,
but it's this, he's a bit of a her to this,
and he's showing me this thing like we roast, blah, blah, blah,
roast battles, but they're PG 13 roast
battles okay or he goes but that works good for the jolly cat he goes and I'm just gonna like you
know I'm just this Wednesday I'm just gonna do my character you know and like I'm gonna just say
things it's like the jolly cat or whatever Do you do you do come on God I forgot about
This guy is dangerous what a night for you Brett Michaels
Jolly I why saw the cat is very sweet
Jolly cat but Michael's number and Brett Nichols goes I'm gonna get you on an album that's gonna happen
I said I would see you know what I'm a producer all of them
You guys call me jolly cat. This is definitely happening
But he says it was his eyes shut because he didn't look at me in the eyes, which I found very weird
You know, I can't look in the eyes because he's lying
Here's makes empty promises across what you on the field
She's stadium jolly cat album done tomorrow. Jay. What are you doing because we're going on a 13 city fuck tour
He said you're gonna see me before we did the show at PNC you will not and I what?
Never this book make sure you text me not that bold guy text me don't don't text the other
I want to first with the picture you know send it to Brett Michaels dot call. I mean it was just 98
No, but the ball guys gonna get the ball
He's tossing into the fucking ether. Did you get his number?
No, no.
I think he genuinely likes Eric from booking
because he like tagged him on his post about Series 6M.
We'll override him and text him directly.
Yeah, but we'll have to get the number from Eric.
Eric, give us the number, dude.
Don't post it out.
You're ball-tooler, bitch.
I'll tell you what, right now, he might come through
if you get the number, but if there's no number,
there's no promise. I have to call me. Hey it's Jay from the other
day. He should already know because we're best friends. Did he go like this? What? I'm not
gonna say from the radio show. Don't you see that? Why do you guys so mad that Brent Michaels gave us all?
Something to do. No absolutely hope that all happens. I'd be awesome if Lou plays catch on Go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go Rock a love I'd be so upset if he was going to bed with somebody else tonight
I mean him like a thing we to think yeah
No, what are you doing? Oh don't go up with brandy seat. Don't go up there with Mars a pan
Oh my god You he came in here. Don't go up there with Neapolitan ice cream. He came in here. Just dusted the room with promises
Yeah, I can't leave you guys don't believe it. Yes, I got a cure for your gassy tummy
It takes me yeah, exactly
Blue why don't you want something to believe it
Play CC CC the one with the broken body or is that nicky six?
You're gonna make Mars Mars that's what I get a tailplum together about
See the veil might be a little beat up to he went through some pretty bad
Drug shit. Yeah, that's like their table ladders chairs match. He was like bad bad
I can see before we get off to off a cage that CC Deville 1988
But they didn't go harder than the crew though, then they tried to get Ricky rocket for some
Like pedophile hunter shit boy
But then it was was wasn't real
I guess because he's still jamming Ricky rocket is the most believable pedophile name. Oh, I'm Ricky rocket Ricky rocket
You want to see my rocket? Hey, it also sounds like a kids character. I'm Tom puppies and candy
You want to go a love be alone with me Bobby dolls the one who changed the most. It's Cinderella Eric Brittanham. Okay. I used to draw him a lot. He I mean what a way to bring up we are gonna be drawing today. We are I used to draw him a lot.
And Eric Brinham in Cinderella changed a lot. He was like a blonde long hair whatever and then now he's like a burly like bikeryy, black hair, dark hair, short hair looking guy.
Do you draw him still?
At least I've never drawn him.
I've never drawn him.
Do you draw a OG-error-print-a-ham?
Can you bring up Eric, what's his name?
Britain-ham.
Eric Britain-ham.
And uh.
CC Deville has one of my favorite quotes.
I think it was from that VH1
behind the scenes or whatever.
All right, music.
Yeah, was talking about this drug, all this drug taking.
And then he said, it was the house of Horace,
then it became the house of horrors.
And you know someone at VH1 was like, yes,
we're gonna run that on every fucking commercial
for behind the music.
When he was young, I loved Erica,
putting him because he did, he was real big on the throw the guitar around his body.
Yeah. Great move.
A handy dropper.
It worked. He was great at it.
But did you mean you put your pants down when you saw it?
Yeah, dude. I pulled my umbrose right down.
Yeah, dude. He looked a lot different when he came out.
Then Bobby doll from Poison is the other one in the band
who just doesn't look like.
He was the most maybe girlish pretty
when they were young besides Brett Michaels.
And he got like the most hardened adult look, right?
Yeah, he party too hard.
His name was what?
Bobby doll.
D-A-H-L though.
You gotta fight if your name is Bobby doll.
Nope.
Yeah, Bobby doll now doesn't look at all like when he was when he was younger,
did he was a gorgeous lady?
They were all beautiful chicks.
They were.
That had to be so confusing if you were coming in from the 70s into the 80s.
And that takes off.
And I was guys like, what the get like the Sinatra group?
It's confusing to me as a child myself.
I would.
Yeah, my old dad.
Yeah, but I was like, he had no idea, I'm not sure. I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. His name is Koi Kendall. That's pretty hilarious Look him up look up bring up look with the catch ragged in album cover. Oh
For them could have got it to
CC was the ugliest
But that album cover I remember my cousin she had I was like damn look at these broads. Yeah, he's goes like sluts
I would 100% that yeah from far away like those are those are women of course
Damn don't wow, okay, they're all in full-blown lady makeup. I know
Look at you in lady white. I bet these sluts are fucking cool. Oh, oh, damn, dude. These are moms that let you drink Pepsi late
I don't care. I'm on the phone with my friend right bottom right is a Ricky rocket the drummer. Yeah
That's the rocket girl. It's flowing. Yeah, Ricky rocket now keeps the he keeps the lady hair
So many here I can now it is funny though and hair bands do the move of like mom's from the time because they've done what my mom did
They had long crazy hair and then they get an older lady's haircut.
Yeah.
Or they go real short in the back, bang.
That's what I mean.
It's exactly.
It's sort of like some poo fun top or something.
They get a jony from work.
Yeah, they judge up the back and have some fucking bangs in the front,
which if you're into like industry, you know, like hardcore techno music, probably.
Maybe, but it's just it does like
Work these guys when they try to do that and keep a poof hair. It's like the guy from the Goo Goo dolls. Oh, man
He had a haircut that that you saw that yeah, there's Ricky Rockets hair right there. Look what a jag-off he looks like
Oh, yeah
Which way he's platt soup no all the way to the right. Platsuit CC to Bill.
That really is.
It's like the mom and Kate plus eight hair. He's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a Oh man, but you were a young girl, not an aged drummer.
You know, you look like you run a hair salon like he does.
It's such like a particular woman's haircut.
Yeah.
I must say, listen, C.C. DeVille, to me, his hair looks kind of silly
because it's like layered long, but he has a long hair.
The other guy just got like the natural progression of hair.
You know, I mean, long hair.
Now he just has like a short haircut.
Spiked up a little bit.
Ricky Rock, it's hair is ass nine.
It requires a, it requires one of those cylinder brushes
and an attachment on a hair dryer every day.
Also, when he walked in,
dad would be like, cool haircut.
He goes, hey guys, oh yeah, chopped off the hair.
I don't know if you guys noticed.
They're like, no, I don't even know.
You look still so rad, I didn't know.
I got a new hairstylist, Pam.
And she said, she gave herself this haircut
and thought this would be good for me.
She says this always gets the manager's attention.
He said, give me a Flowby number seven on top.
You do have four different decades of hair right there.
The guy all the way to the left has Metallica
with Bobie Dull when they cut their hair off.
He's a teen cuck.
It does lead to the cooking and the picture.
And then you got like Stunt Aussie.
C.C. Deville.
It's got an Aussie at the time, yeah.
Yeah, Brett's 80s.
You got Brett.
I would tell you right now thriving in this
room. Almost Axel Rosenthal. I think yeah, yeah,
the app has baby. He was always in shape.
It was in shape yesterday. Huh? Not that I noticed, but he was in shape yesterday.
It's not the shape. He's an older guy at this point now, but he looks.
But he doesn't have a belly. He looks great. Oh, always in shape as far as
Oh, thin. You know, obviously he used to but he looks, he looks great. Oh, oh, he's in shape as far as Oh, thin, you know, I'm saying he used to be like, like chiseled though, who's still holding
out of the city dreams, city field dream. No, he's not happening. It's happening for
sure. We're going to the game. You are going, April, I would love to have a catch, a catch
up. You know, I would love nothing more than it's happening. Blue witsky to become just
text message buddies with Brett Michael. And then you take his stroke. Hold on.
I get nails and be in the horn.
Yeah.
You nails and BM dude having a three way hit the basis.
Yeah.
Just zip in.
Well, you're not making it around second before you're
huffing and puffing bro.
Who you can first.
How's it?
Are you still not smoking?
He's back.
I took six days off.
I quit.
All right.
All right.
He cleared the system out.
Now he's back.
Now it's good.
It's like start from scratch. Like an 18 year old again. Hey guys.
All we said. That normal change. Totally good, dude. Now you're good. I'd say when
you're about 60 quip for six more days. What was it? The booze? They got you.
Uh, I had the flu and then once I got you, everybody smokes on the flu. No, I didn't.
I, there was the best I ever breathed in my life. But then once the flu went away, uh,
I was like, let's party. And the first cigarette I had after six days of not holy shit.
Looting the writ of the flu, he lost it.
Yeah.
Then I lost the flu.
It's better than any joy ever.
The whole dog told me, shit.
It's the best you've ever breathed.
That's crazy.
You walk around the flu going,
ah, you're not exaggerating.
He say you never breathed better than when he had the flu because he stopped smoking finally. That's crazy
I slept so well. Oh my goodness. Have you ever got a sleep study? No, I find out what mine is next week
I really think you need a mask. Yeah, dude
The big cat snores dude. I don't snore. I flip flop
I don't know if that next time I don't sleep I'm certain I'm certain't snore, I flip flop. I don't know if that makes sense. Sleep it.
I'm certain I snore.
Same here.
Christine woes pretty hard.
I don't saw, I saw log sometimes.
But I don't.
B and J like every night it's snore six.
You sink up?
Yeah, Christine falls asleep always before me.
So it's like I have to hear her die 27 times before I can fall asleep.
That makes my heart pound. That's your OCD. So it's like she I have to hear her die 27 times before I can fall asleep
That's your OCD
If I was to these I have to hear a die it goes come on. Go see come on It's like you're 26 then she goes
Okay, all right, you're a dream man. I would just like to I would like to have something that you know like
It's Sal's story of when he finally got a sleep asleep at me mask and he slept and he was like I felt
But great great stones at the same thing don't I anyone I know who has one but they're trying to make you
Themselves not be the only asshole wearing a hose to bed. Oh where I was about to
I think I'm just I think I'm gonna accept young death. Yeah, I think I can wear it
Dude whatever on the side flip too much. I told you I'm just I think I'm gonna accept young death. Yeah, I think I can wear it. Dude whatever I'm a side flip too much
I told you I'm gonna top gun helmet
Shown down down down down down down down
personalized ones yeah like the little Jewish kids when they personalize their Yamacus
It's gonna say like you know so like soed man
Whatever my nickname is like cracker. It's pretty small now, right? Just goes right here. I think they make it
They even have like the future stick ones are they make I don't think those are very good. You're not very good. I think I think you want to get the oh
The big the big I want to wake up in the morning when Katie looks at me take my mask off and go. What were you doing up there?
Yes, I am dangerous Nolan
Yes, I am dangerous Nolan
Sleep apnea
Modification ever saw is one one guy made it the alien face hugger. That's great. That's I go. That's fucking cool
Fantastic. Yeah, that's great one. Yeah decorate it. I will I probably have to get one I'm like at a bane mask
I don't want to get the sleep study because they're gonna tell tell me that I die a lot. And then when Katie goes to bed I go the bed is yours.
Butterflies you think you have the sheets but they merely there's a lot of adapted.
The sheets are funny. That's great. Shimpoongpoong. Yeah.pum-pum-pum. Oh, that's weird. I can't, what I can't.
Oh, I'd get an old school hockey, Goldie Mass.
That's pretty awesome.
You could have sleeping a full Goldie Mass.
Clicked that.
There's another one.
Yeah, that's the one that just goes in your nostrils,
but when they show a hot girl using it, by the way,
she's so wouldn't agree to it,
they had to actually, that's actually Photoshopped
onto her face.
Yeah, she's just a stop-phone by already sleeping. That one I could do.
It's not. I don't know if I could. My nose is plugged. By the way, let's
get a speaker for your snoring. It really hogs it out.
Here we go. Hoseless, maskless, micro CPEP, anti snoring machine. What did you
have? Yeah, what did you have a stuffy nose?
Here we got it, but I always have a stuffy nose.
10.
I got about five until our guest.
Wow.
I kind of, are they here?
I kind of do and don't know what's going on.
You don't know.
I'm not really.
So we have adult performer, Ebony Mistik,
Christina, if you can bring a picture over, please.
Please.
Maybe some of her work before she gets in here.
Please.
Ebony Mystique is coming in bodacious body.
Can I see him?
Oh, I see him's lovely.
Yes.
Black female.
Black female.
A good name.
It would be a real appropriation of Ebony Mystique,
which is the white girl.
It's Amy and the baby.
Ha, ha, ha.
Um, yeah, Ebony Mystique is a female porn star. It's Amy and the baby. Ha ha ha.
Yeah, Ebony Mistik is a female porn star. She's gonna come in here.
We're gonna hear what she's promoting,
what she has going on.
And then, yeah.
Yeah, and then,
oh boy, there she is.
In at work.
Yeah, I didn't know you knew her, Andy.
Oh, that's not you.
I was really gonna ask that.
I actually watched this.
This looks, it looks like the guy, she's fucking, swore to God is the guy who was on the spate on the
Space station by himself and Armageddon
The bad guy from eight millimeter Russian space
Go towards the anchor steam and they get close on his face. I didn't realize because they really focus on her
I didn't realize at all this guy's face. It's cuz like
60 years old,
maybe. Go, go. Just keep going until you see his face like he's sitting down. It's maybe
yeah here. It doesn't look like that guy. Yeah, totally. I just want this to work. I want to get off
this asteroid. So she's coming to hang out. You can look. I look you look. That was weird Andy.
That's all right too. Dan did a real like he's the whole thing. You're uncomfortable with us in the room.
No, I didn't. I looked at Andy to talk to him. I mean that guy has a flag. Damn. You getting trouble if you look at porn.
No. Are you being hit at home? Tell me this is too big. It's not the yellow. Uh, yeah. No, this is perfect.
This is right up my alley. Isn't that got in that critical?
I love the hands behind your head.
Yeah, you know, hard to create move.
Never sat like that, but I've been a mystique, yeah.
So, you know, crazy body.
Uh, oh, I love fake taxi.
I love fake taxi.
Is that your jam?
I love it.
I get lost in the, uh, in the, in the role playing.
We like to care.
We should ask her what's her favorite character in the play.
Yeah, I really want you to give her a phone and death.
Inside the actor's studio.
Absolutely.
Fake taxi.
Don't ask the dumb questions first.
Like, is there really a fake taxi?
Did you really just get to a taxi and find out you had to fucking have a mask?
Did you really not have your wallet on you?
Hold on, can you please having Andy ask those questions sincerely?
Was it, do you really not know that guy at all?
Yeah.
Like, they really just filmed you in a taxi one, though.
Yes.
Was that guy really, was your, that guy really your realtor?
I do.
I just want to see if she's like, I just want to see if she's like,
why would you ever think that was real?
Are you mad at him?
She was like, yeah.
I want to know if she keeps K-Fape.
Do you worried about dealing with God
because you had sex with your white steps on?
Right.
No, that's too deep of a question.
I want Andy to ask to see if she stays in character.
I wonder if I'd be like, did you just take that cam?
She's like, I needed a ride.
Would I be the same thing with the steps on thing?
You have sex with your white steps on.
Is that a moral?
She's like, no, it's his, my husband.
No blood, no blood relation.
Yeah, he saw my titties and he couldn't resist.
Okay.
I was glad to believe.
You think it was cool that those workers had sex with you
when your hand was stuck in that window?
I was glad to believe you had sex with me.
Were you really stuck in that washer?
You were stuck in that washer, that dryer,
and all those guys had sex with you.
As a human resources lady, you're not supposed
to have sex with your blu. Yeah
Yeah, you're doing it wrong. Do you work there still? Yeah, do you still work at fucking fucking industries?
Anyway, you can ask since your
You were in suck fucking
Are you still the floor manager at the fucking
I'm not sure if you're gonna get the shoes. Are you still the floor manager at the second fuck?
You're still civil engineering, that new fuck palace?
Civil engineering.
Fuck, that's funny to know.
Good lord, so yeah, she's gonna come in
and we're gonna talk to her a little bit
and then we're gonna draw.
We got some sketch pads here.
Who said they were good at drawing on the, not me on the, it was you.
DJ Lou, I want to contest the second grade. There's DJ Lou,
what did you have to draw on second grade?
I naked black woman cartoons.
Which ones?
I don't know. You just had a copy of the picture and then, you know,
I like the draw turtle. Yeah. I won that. Did you send in that late night
informational? It was in the back of a newspaper. I draw pirate. Send it in. Oh, maybe the back of a comic book. I remember.
Oh, yeah, I think I have to draw the turtle turtle or the pirate pirate a bunny. Maybe I don't remember if I
Was good at drawing any of those. I feel like you are first i feel yeah i am not i
wonder if also all these new talents from luisky
he's hard drawing a mouth guitar first of all he's getting into hobbies let him go
yeah i'm sure the stage of life they're old talents i'm just bringing them back before i
get great next week he's like i'm better at bird watching than only in the
six days he quit smoking he picked up drawing I'm not gonna lie, this moves me. There's a lot of stuff going on in here. I can't really see the emotion.
So we all drawing this lady?
Oh, I'm pissed for a while, but I'll try.
Absolutely, but yeah, try.
I'll try.
Stop saying try, guys.
Art is art.
It's how you see her.
I might be a little bit more like a little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of
a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of
a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of
a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit So we all drawing this lady. I'm a whore, but I'll try. I'll try. Yeah, try.
I'll draw.
Stop saying try, guys.
Art is art.
It's how you see her.
I might do a whole different take on it.
Absolutely.
You might see me draw what I would look like with giant boots.
Like a wolf in the moon.
Are we drawing her as she poses?
Or maybe we take a scene from one of her?
No, don't be.
Don't be that guy.
That's why I'm out clearing.
I'm tearing it with the room.
It's probably fine, I know, it's true, it goes.
So I think we're gonna watch your double butt fuck scene
and try to draw that.
Can I draw it?
But I wanna draw it like it's a modern take on politics.
We have to see how we feel.
I don't know.
I think it's the two party system.
She would be, I would say, I wish she was able to go on the console, but she can't.
Maybe a standing against that wall in like a pose.
I can do a nice classy.
She could be in a chair.
I'd like stand.
I prefer standing I think.
This is basically an art, this is an art exhibit that we're trying to we need to get that crazy button
Volved in some way so can't be a dead-on front shot okay you're the art director um you know I want to see well when she gets
Here we'll take a look at her lines we'll look at her you know drawing and a lot of people this would seem like a low-brow thing but this is art
Jason artist I'm not an artist.
You are.
But I'm going to be an artist.
You make us refer to you as the artist.
Oh, that's true.
I do.
Yeah, why did we decide to draw?
And not just to get a picture of her, Jerk off.
There.
Have you stayed there against the wall?
Oh, God.
We probably could just talk to her.
Could just talk to her.
No, it's a fun twist.
Well, I'm saying we're having a porn so we don't
really do this that off that's not really the show is not too many porn stars on so we
have a we got to do a fun fucking thing and we like that little contest here yeah so
uh... we're gonna see who draws the best and we'll open to a presentation is she is she
gonna pick her favorite she can pick her favorite we should also put this out to a
Twitter poll see who wins for sure.
Who wins the ultimate thing?
Is Jacob gonna draw?
I'm gonna draw Jacob on her.
Jacob, draw what you think a large titted, large ass black woman would look like and then we'll see if it happens to look like her at all.
Do not be racist about it.
Okay.
Okay.
But he's an easy sell.
But soon she has extensions. Don't draw a bunch of crazy little like those little
doberman tails on their head. Well, I'm looking at her. Oh, yeah, draw her then from a
picture. Come on, Jay. Also, I do a double anal though. Jacob looks like he won a contest
to draw her. Like from home, you know, we're like, hey,
we got a little boy who wanted Jason to be to
forge the.
Yeah, you get to, Jacob, we're going to probably hit the
wave, dude.
Hit the wave, sweet, sweet,
sweet child.
You should, we should find the name of one of her
co-stars, Jacob.
You should keep asking questions about that guy
Please look that up. I really want Andy. I really want to see Andy be like hey, so not cab
Do they just pick you up? Yeah, I'm just confused by porn stories. Yeah, is it like cash cab?
Yeah, instead you have sex with a guy
Yeah, do you pay for the fair and for additional mile?
Is that why you had to have sex on them?
Hey, goes, you didn't pay when you got there, did you?
Did he still make you pay?
It was like a flat fee.
Does he always do Uber?
They're running 10 minutes late.
Classic.
Oh, boy.
Of course.
Well, take our first break.
If they're running 10 minutes late,
we could roll for another minute or two.
What do I mean?
What do I mean? We could take a break.
I wanted to see what the guy's name was so we could get Jacob all ready to ask a question
about a specific porn, male porn star, she fuck.
But I want to be that guy, the one who looks like the old Russian.
Yeah.
Who are the guys in the game now?
It is Peter Norath and my dad is T.T. boy.
My dad.
Yeah.
I don't know the guys now.
Oh, I thought you were asking if those guys are still in the game
That well, hey, so Peter North might be TT boy out of the game forever. Oh
All right, bunch of them got a AIDS
Yeah, I was gonna say to Jacob if or I genuinely want to know like or have him ask like do you drop armor getting quotes
When you see that when they fucker guy that looks like that, she like you look like that dude an Armageddon
She's got this guy far no to him. No, damn. She's never gonna get that far. She's not gonna get that right or she's she comes in hot with Armageddon
Knowledge, but I do have questions about this guy. Yeah, this guy's ticker. Really I'm like that guy is a I know it's all gonna be like political
Ants, but that's her husband outside shot, but I have seen a couple of these girls
Really hot young porn star has come on the the STR show with like
Their boyfriend or long-term boyfriend or those always their fiance. Yeah, and they're just weird looking weird and they're just cute
Tell they're just like drug-related guys who just or they'll found them gave them their drugs and then put them in porn basically for them
It's weird. Damn.
But just when they're there, they're like, she loves this.
And you're like, hey.
Oh, that's your guy, huh?
He's pretty cool with us playing this, how far will this ruler go on your snatch game?
He goes, mm-hmm.
We're actually going to get dinner for this.
They are.
Oh, I got it.
What's the spot in town?
It's got a, what's good seafood?
Yeah, it goes.
Anyplace cool with squirting? Yeah, yeah, he goes any place cool with squirting here
I need some preferably I need someone that can leak through felt good free
Preferably something yeah, we'll take our first break and we'll come at Ebony Mystique do we have a fact sheet on our dog
Huh I'm gonna have to take one sheet.
Have a one sheet.
Thanks, dude.
You know the industry so well.
I got Jacob.
Have a one sheet.
Coming up after the break.
We'll be right back.
Everyone we're hanging out with Mark Face, Andy A.
Check right out now.
Come on.
Lou, you're so ready to draw.
We'll be right back.
It's the bonfire.
And now back to the bonfire with Big J. Ogris in and Dan Soder.
J. Son, yes, Danya.
Everyone knows that the human found.
He's the most beautiful.
Have I been missed?
Andy got you here?
Andy got caught on Instagram.
Andy got caught on Instagram.
Andy got caught of a horn dog
She took over shirt next to me your horn dog. Ebony back me up here. She took her shirt off and a rarie always pouring out of the
Bandai
Their twins to look like TNT mayor
Lewin's to to some mark does the other one feel it
I got sensation sure. I love a titty lick Oh Loon stew to some more does the other one feel it?
I got sensation sure. I love a titty lick
Who don't I Don't know that was an invite that wasn't an invite for you freaking guys don't they look like the titties
They like to look at it like put your pastries. What kind of my second titties?
I don't know some guys maybe they just do they try to get the
Gorbly please just a little bit. Just don't don't suck. Oh,
Chong donks that's boom. There you go. That's both good fucking pussy
Jacob
He bailed Jacob left. I know where it's gonna go. She's gonna duty in my mouth
Jacob left. I know where it's gonna go. She's gonna duty in my mouth.
That was perfect, Lou.
God, how do you have so you have such a great job? All right, talent. Are we starting? Well, she's gonna get on dress and then we're gonna draw the we're gonna draw the form.
I think it should be standing though. I think so, yeah.
I mean the whole button you were going for sitting already.
You just started drawing a chair.
No, you don't know what I was doing, dude.
I sure don't.
You don't let me in.
You don't know my process.
Beautiful.
Thank you.
I haven't even much of a pre-short.
Oh, that's it.
Let's see for more.
Could you, at different times you could
Jiggly oh wow, I didn't even know there was nothing that was loop banging around back there Here through my headphones. It's the thunder of the thunder of a sheikh's clapping. Oh great Odin thunder
Yes, yes, yes, that's more dead on perfect
Okay, yeah, yes, that's more dead on perfect. Okay. Yeah, I'll cover this
Okay
Over here Dan how are you playing it? Where are you starting it? You know what I like to I like the flow I like to get in and feel the flow of the sketch
kind of kind of where I, I see the light touching.
Mm-hmm.
Andy, where are you at?
I am concentrating so hard on trying not to insult
Ebony with my horrible drawing.
You're still.
I thought you were saying that stared her pussy.
And then, the boobies are gonna be big.
Don't worry about that.
So she's asking to make sure you make the boobs look nice
You know what I'm doing with like it's a real if I could no one's got a good who framed a Jessica rabbit body
DJ lose where's the DJ loses already so great
Yeah, you see at a big old rabbit dong.
Oh, okay, I'm gonna be playing with him.
It was the, I think I'm just,
I wanna make one of those classy drawings
that sexy people have on their walls.
We were like, oh, that is sex.
And how you feeling about yours?
Not great.
He's like a racing emblem.
No, no, I'm trying to shade.
I just don't take this personal.
No, I won't.
I'm going too far.
I'm going just.
You can't fuck me up that bad.
Well, I'm going just to get music.
I'm already lost a foot.
We're still part, you know?
If you're good.
It's so much fun, guys.
See, I'm just going.
This is so much fun.
I feel good about this.
This is the best show in the world, A, B, N.
Hello.
You mean, this show could be nominated?
This is definitely nominated.
Nope, different show.
Everybody needs a fucking get nominated.
Nominate this show also, please.
Oh, look at these.
You know what, I feel like I messed up.
Can I start over?
You can?
Yes, please.
Give me a twin.
Because I was doing more like a...
I was trying to go with something sexy.
I'm just not feeling this sexy. It's not sexy Jack.
Give us a cast of this pool.
No, you don't get to see until I'm done.
You don't get to see this.
Feeder extremely hard to draw.
By the way.
I was drawing.
Yeah.
That's because I'm a fuck.
Oh, we forgot to ask Ebony, who she thought was gonna be better. Oh
Do you think who do you think's that Christine you're not drawing? Yeah, we're between between Lew and Jay
You think what's gonna be sorry you guys told me about it
He does have a twin oh
He has a chong dong don't you worry
I know it was I was working on it didn't go I don't need for show happening
Please show me no
Actually, wait, it's really bad. No, it's not I know he's being so hard on himself really day
I don't know what the hell that is. That was you squish the bug on your paper. Oh
Gosh guys, I'm making these guys uncomfortable. No, you that's my
Her carry my drawing skills is making me not me. I'm gonna. I'm gonna start a good comfortable
Sorry, he used to draw it. He used to draw rock stars. I'm really nice
And you are very He used to draw rock stars. I'm really nice.
You are very sweet.
I don't know how to draw hands.
I don't know how to draw.
Hands are so hard.
Shout out to Baffer.
This is a fucking best show.
How do you draw hands?
You know, oh, Laney, I knew to do the curves.
The curves is an easy part. It's the little intricacies of her lovely nails
Okay trade your black for the brown for
I know I know Jay was gonna be fucking good. Jay's looking really good. I know, I knew Jay was gonna be fucking good. Jay's actually really good.
He drawed a lot as a kid.
He's using a pencil, and everybody else is using charcoal.
I'll get in here with some charcoal, don't you worry, Lou.
Andy just took my charcoal to thief.
Hold on, I give her a pack.
Get trace over it, your French weirdo.
Think about if we were like a Santa Monica beat and we're doing a cartoon
A tunic or what are they called caricature? Yeah, Karen. Sure. Those are always so fun
Agreed right I like them very much. I guess I'm charcoal. They make a lot of money to doing. They clean up. They really do
This one that right one is a little op-side
He's gonna give a little artistic with it
The hands because you're right there and the hand are thing are you tattoos are revenue?
Yeah, there are two of them are my family members. There's some stars here. I have left now cry later because we all know about that
That's what we're doing when we're gonna see my
Drawing but I do have Kanye
Remember his college drop out the teddy bear
Yeah, I was like with Louis Vuitton that was totally my era. I was a big blue leaf in at that
I don't know if I'm gonna get all the nuances of those in my drawing
I'm going for the just a lovely curves of your body. I got a wee girl
How your body a I got a wee girl. How your body?
A wee girl.
Oh, well.
I got a roster girl.
She has threads.
That was the younger girl.
I have my nickname Tiny, which I think is Twinn.
Tiny, I bet.
Well, Tiny Mod, that's the place to call me.
Hmm.
I forget what.
Oh, I have a little bit of a rainforest I was starting.
So there's some levy.
Lou, you love the rain force
What did you do in the rain for a
Twin trying to spend years trying to save it
He's not kidding. I know you're he's not
Not we still got the rain force don't we have it?
Let's just say that you
Like the zoo or the aquarium it gets worse and worse
Well, that's his next project mines and artistic ask him. Oh, why you're an aquatic
I've just donated to
Causes that my friend Eddie V is into do you like Pearl Jam Ebony? That's me Eddie Vetter. He means I think Pro Jam
I'm a fuck the pro jam. Hey. Oh, yeah
What did you think actually do you know who crazy P is crazy PJ?
No, oh
She's a girl DJ out of the UK and I don't know if that's techno, but it whatever it is
It's like that playboy music party like the hustler club music. I don't know if you anyway
It's you can dance all this Shawshank redemption music. She's super fun. That's exactly what is yeah
Like it's all night every jam is the jam. Yeah, I love her
Mine's gonna be over a leather sofa as people are crazy
But now you gotta see how she looks
She looks like
Mine's a mine's a I also
Don't ruin Jesus it's art it's subjective right Ebony yes at least my biggest supporter
I really all you guys you guys are doing a great good job
I ain't seeing yours but I heard it's good how long are you down for Ebony until
the second but I'm thinking about so this week is a Zodica. If you don't know what that is,
Zodica is another porn convention. I say right. It's pretty good. Thank you.
D.T. this week.
A Zodica DC is this weekend. If you guys want to go out, meet all your favorite porn stars.
Five minutes left in the show, people.
Well, sorry, revealing. I don know what you have a count down that I
Don't argue that I'm done my friend. All right. I like to hurry up. It's like nine minutes. I'm probably I would
We should give a count down for me to come to fruition
I would need seven more months and a trip back through alcoholism
But then I would find it because this is to me. Thank you. You are too hard on yourself. I I strive
Oh my god, see It looks good to me. Thank you. You are too hard on yourself. I I strive. Oh
My god see tell you everything supportive. She's so supportive Evidence you are so supportive
You're just like modern art
No for real
We put them in that's what I was going
Was going for some modern
And there's little little nod to your lovely fingernails on there but just a
little you know I just I like to go with something that you could see in a
nice you know done yeah dude yeah all right done
how in love Jay is with his Jake I'll tell you he hasn't said a word the whole time. He's been serious
I have a feeling Jay cooked up something nice. Take a good all right
Yeah, seriously don't you don't you ask the chef how many ages though the reinforce himself over here?
Yeah, I see for real. We must save those papers
What are we gonna do with them now?
Good paper Dan. You're good paper
You're taking out of my check
You're a good paper I just affect these guys have on braze right now you guys that's dedication. That's like that's it now
What's the first as we show her? Okay? What do we take pictures of them all in?
Show or you won't we're gonna do that
regardless let's do that first we'll show let's show Ebony hurt pictures no it's like Christine
the picture of all of them okay yeah I'm gonna get rid of my excess paper are we done yeah you can
you can you can you can rob you can rob you can get you can get you can get you can get you can get your I could get you Damn dude, Jay's picture is good. Yeah, you should shut up Andy. You should run
I'm so excited for Andy's
Jay I was can I tell you something I was awestruck
By how good it was I told you this what real art does to you essence of her face
well, I like to say
Ebony's my muse and
We got to get them all pictures of them first. I like what you did here. I'm telling it's a little modern art. You got loose picture already
Dance is very nice
nice. Luz makes me have me.
Luz?
Yeah.
That's it.
Luz, you know what?
It looks like eating McClarer with small titties.
No, that's great.
Good job, Luz.
He even signed it.
I do cartoons.
That's the same thing.
And I got a cartoon series out right now.
Did she have shoulder pads on there?
Yeah, it looks like that good job, Blue
He's so proud
As he should I told y'all my reason we bad
It was the attempt. One that we...
Probably do. Oh, show Ebony yet I wanted to judge.
One time the judge.
I don't know how to do it together.
It's gonna break me right here,
I'm sure we're doing that.
No, it's good, she's taking pictures
and we're all gonna reveal soon.
They did a really good job, guys.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Damn, Jacob.
Even when you're not here, it works.
I'm excited to see Jay's.
Yeah, Jay, I'm gonna tell you.
I knew it was.
Jay's got it.
Tweaks.
Now you can't do quick.
Put it down.
Impressels down, dude.
Impressels down.
Okay, you're right. I I need to add to this
You got a little bit of bat wings in there, but I like it. What are you talking about? Okay?
Okay, class who wants to reveal so what story let's start with the worst
You do it at all Andy do I show yours show this is mine. I'm sorry. I told you I
Thank you, Laney. It looks great.
But I'm laughing at Laney's laugh.
It is amazing.
But I put tiny in there for you.
I'm looking at that. Thank you.
Jay, that was a little upside.
Jay, how you feeling?
Jay, you got notes?
I got notes.
Do you got notes?
She's headless.
Lane or Nipple's jet black.
Have you seen Nipple's?
She had her hands on her.
Your nipples are black.
It actually looks like a monstrous picture
of a cock pointing down from behind.
It looks like the back shot of balls and a dick pointing down.
Hey, Jay, exactly.
Turn it around, let me see.
No, no, no, no, show.
Oh, well, the balls are down.
No, hold it.
But picture this.
Picture if you were looking at a guy's
from between his legs, from behind him.
No, no, other way, other way.
Other way. No, other way. No, other way, the way you had it. a guys from between his legs from behind him No, no other way other way other way other way other way the way you had it
That's what you would see from a you'd see his ball bag
Hard
You're such an artist thank you jave reading into my that jay I went with a let's drink this guy can't stop drawing Cox
I had let's drink white wine on a leather sofa. Yes, please. Yeah, I
Lately did okay, I don't mind that at all. Yeah, I don't mind that it holding her now her breasts
It almost looks like maybe back to back like the duality of woman
Holding them just like in it. Yeah, I'll now present mine
Here we go.'t want to go Luke
That is amazing
Beautiful Jason
Hard
Feet then we're quite got the hands
Where she was standing he got he got it up you guys got it all every picture here is amazing. Did you lose that's not your
All right, okay, every picture here is not amazing
Yours is a little bit more detailed. Yeah, sure you're giving the curve. You're giving my sex stand. I like DJ
Luz, I gotta be honest. I even threw
The pussy line. I got I was just about to say I got the camel
Yeah, it's giving
What about the J. Lose Ebony
Okay, we should all we all have to sign. I don't even know cool. She line
We have to sign now the pictures. Please sign it you guys it'll be available at bonfire e-bay's account
Run it up
If you save it till when I'm dead, then it'll be a lot more valuable.
Frame it.
Oh, see, I didn't mind.
I didn't like it.
Well, we'll frame these in the end.
You know, the bottom, like a painting.
Yeah.
So if you want mine, my signature is here, obviously.
Look at that.
They Picasso the Pistons.
We'll put these in the office.
Christine, don't act like you don't aren't impressed.
That your, that all your artsy boys did so well. It well also kind of so I drove Christine's head on Ebony's body
I
I didn't notice that right away
He's thinking of you Christine. He's thinking of you. I mean it was it was an arts and crafts day today
And I think we did very well. You guys did amazing. Yeah. Yeah. So first, thanks, Anthony.
Thank you.
First for me, inspiration.
Yeah, you guys are great.
Thank you for having me.
Thank you for having me.
I love that you found a new hobby you can chase.
Well, practice.
But you can practice.
Chase is a good word.
We're drawing backward dicks.
Yeah.
There's a market for that.
Absolutely.
Um, so fun to have you back in Markface too.
Thank you.
Anthony, Mystique.
Absolutely fun. Good luck on your avian nominations.
Hopefully I'll see you there.
You will and you guys if you have not voted,
what's your show again that you're nominating?
SDR show.
If you have not nominated SDR show,
I believe tomorrow's the last day or is it today?
Tomorrow is the last day.
Do it.
To win.
Like who are you going against?
Christy Canyon and what's her name? Christie Canyon Ginger
Lillian. Oh, dude, that's
crazy. Oh, thank God. I don't
want to go against. I don't
want to go against friends.
What if I win and I got to
go up there? You'll drink
together. You're a friend.
They'll be happy. Straight
slut dress. Yeah, do you do that? Yeah
No, you know it's do they do have the gay avian by the way also the gay vian how you could wear the dress there here
I'll host that one that will be cute
Yes, I mean yes, bitch. I'm so impressed with everyone's artistic talent
Yes, I mean, yes, I'm so impressed with everyone's artistic talent
We had a real day here. Yes, this is a rich full day happy holidays
I'm not saying that DJ lose was a good picture
You forgot the eyes and you do them in wow
Two narrow and last moment follow Ebony mystique on Instagram. I got a blinking Ebony mystique official
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checking out this Thursday through Saturday dance order dot com for all the dates we push
through so are we still had 20 seconds after all that. Just reprise dude.
I might live in this parade.
Do you?
You really do dude, with the gloves?
You look fine.
Looks pretty fucking awesome.
And my scar here.
I had the scar, banjo, banjo.
J.O.K.R.S.N. genius.
Hey guys, thanks for listening to the podcast.
And always remember, you can go to seriousexm.com slash bonfire for a special offer to hear us on the actual radio as well.