The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Step By Step

Episode Date: November 2, 2022

@thebonfiresxm ...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 And now the bonfire with Big J. Okreson and Dan Soder. It's the bonfire, Faction Talk series 6 and 103 Big J. Okreson Dan Soder. Hello. Kicking it with the crew. On Twitter this morning I wake up and I'm taking a dump and then you see offset got shot. Y'all yeah. Oh like for bullshit. A black loop stop.
Starting point is 00:00:22 Are you black loop filling out an application to be a door guard to sell or Blackloop? Stop it. I mean, you were telling me what happened. You read the story. I understood from what I saw. I saw a world star hip hop video. Yeah. Ultimately, and it seems like it was my mind. It was a takeoff. I went to take off. And what I'm reading in the sidebar, they have like text or something, and it's someone describing, I believe, that like, I think someone just shot off a gun. I don't think it was like a fight where he got shot. I think it was like one second, he was alive the next second, he didn't even know what was happening, and we're just gone. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:01 So you just got nailed by a straight bullet, but I could be wrong about that. It could have been calculated I mean, yeah, if it's a if it's a guy just like shooting a gun off and you kill a very famous rapper 28 take off. Yeah, 28 years old Damn, dude, I mean if you're the megos, do you you can't like try to do a two-thirds thing? It's like kind of like you yeah, you can, you can. You think so? Yeah, I think they can. I don't know how. Let's do. You think they continue on? I mean, like TLC, after they lost left eye, huge part of the group, the face of the group.
Starting point is 00:01:35 Now, sure? No. Now it's the Cardi B's husband and the other, the other two guys kind of are the... Quavo and Offset. One's everyone's kind of always talking about. Take that right now. Listen, I'm so white. I didn't know that they call us name until today. Now I personally know him more than the other two
Starting point is 00:01:52 and feel fucking terrible for what happened. No, if that's real. Yeah, that's Quavo there who showed up to be overtake off. Why'd you laugh, Luda, did I say it weird? Quavo? Quavo. Quavo. David, I know that, and I'm an idiot.
Starting point is 00:02:12 I've gotten everything wrong. By the way, people who do those songs. People, I've been talking about football. I said like maybe three things about football in the last week, and I've gotten two thirds of them wrong. And people were just tweeting at me and be like, dude, Christian McCaffrey is like one of many to throw
Starting point is 00:02:25 catch and run one in. Like, Ladinian Thompson was the last one to do it. And then before that, I was like, Roddain did one, two hyzen, so like, now, last person to do that was Archie Griffin. I was like, I don't know what the fuck it is. That's it. He was in my school district, Roddain. Yeah, dude, that was me. That's me.
Starting point is 00:02:41 So even then, when I just said that it was, it was takeoff and I was like, oh, offset got killed. I'm like, I fucking miss it, dude, that was me. That's me. So even then when I just said that it was It was take off and I was like oh offset got killed. I'm like I fucking miss it, dude. I keep fucking miss it It says there was actually there was a So is it dispute an altercation broke out? That's when someone opened fire shooting tape, but that's what I'm saying I don't know if he was involved in the dispute or if like shots were fired in a dispute. Yeah, and hit him Is that what it is? I believe that's what it is. Yeah, and hit him. Is that what it is? Yeah, like a fight happened and you You're getting mad at a guy and they're being like shrapnel based on you dude
Starting point is 00:03:11 Fuck you and then all of a sudden you like I'm gonna kill that guy and you just shoot and then you're like Hey, you killed him on the me go see you. Excuse me I'm shooting at him that fucking what a bomber. Yes, it sucks to match. It's like we But I do believe they can't move on without him. Unless I'm crazy wrong, he's a huge part, but I always thought he was like the other guy. No, TLC could have moved on for sure. And I'm sorry to say this without chili. Do you know, I'm saying I know all three of them are TLC. Black, black,
Starting point is 00:03:45 TLC. If I hate doing this,, we could do this with a thousand bands, order of importance who dies as the band move on. Okay. I'm saying chili dies. TLC definitely moves on. So let him dying ruins the Beatles. Let him dying ruins the Beatles. Mick or Keith dying kills the Beatles.
Starting point is 00:04:02 I mean, that's stones. Mick dying for sure a hundred percent Keith dying But it's hard to do with bands as much you almost have to do with like singing groups like boys to men and shit like that So boys to men the other one got it and die and they just moved on the deep voice guy I don't know about the chili thing because she is the prettiest and she has the best voice, right? T-Boss can't really sing. Left eye was the rapper. So without her. It's popularity though, it's what matters.
Starting point is 00:04:31 It doesn't matter about their quality of their voices at that point. If you go, she was the prettiest arguably, you know, I mean, like T-Boss got pretty hot and crazy sex. Okay, then do N-Vogue next, Mr. Know it all. Okay, bring up N-Vogue. I'll tell you exactly. I'll tell you the two who can't go. crazy sex okay then do n-vogue next mr. know it all okay bring up and vogue I'll tell you exactly I'll tell you the two who can't go the two who can't go is uh the bug eyes one and the one that was in juice those are two people from
Starting point is 00:04:52 n-vogue who can't uh the other ones die in fact some of these bands might tour now just being the two people I'm naming that would be the most important yeah now I don't get a thing it's like skid rows on tour with some guy that means they'll say it's got to be Sebastian Bach even though I hate him be the most important. Now I don't get a thing. It's like skid rows on tour with some guy that means they say it's got to be Sebastian Bach, even though I hate him. Okay. He is your level of importance. Services. All right. To me, okay, I was wrong. I did think of it wrong. Damn, this is the hardest I thought I was going to be. The girl on the right, all the way on the right,
Starting point is 00:05:19 all sass. Don't know her name. And then to me, the importance is personal to me. All the way on the left, the girl that was in juice, I just thought she was fucking beautiful. And then bug eyes and then squunch face. I got one for you. Yeah, I got a brain teaser for you. New edition. Can in sync survive without Justin Timberlake?
Starting point is 00:05:41 No. So that shuts it down. Now can in sync survive without J.C. Shaw say yes. Okay. Exactly. A ton. Yes. Can you survive without the tone? So you're saying they could. It's Timberlake the only one they lose. It has to be Timberlake. Yes, because because he really broke out star. It's almost a hard one in sync. A better one is almost backstreet boys. New kids in the block are backstreet boys because they were all kind of
Starting point is 00:06:06 equal parts in all the songs yeah they can definitely move on and probably should without the 60 year old in their group the tall one backstreet boys Kevin he's out that guy goes that they was on for sure he might die of natural causes while they're still on tour but they do need they need the boring the boring blonde Brian rat face. Yeah Rat wallberg That guy for sure needs to be there. He needs to be the reality is the person you cannot lose at all on that even though his voice sucks AJ and he's balding now and looks weird and dumb AJ dude AJ get fucking get a space to oh a Nick Carter You need because his name got no variety. Yeah
Starting point is 00:06:47 So you can lose in order of importance who has to be there AJ Carter Nick Carter rat face Anybody else could go and they'll figure it out Yeah, that's that's an easy one you've got some 40 you got some 40-year-old women puch and steering wheels right now new edition You fucking don't take him out of there now you fucking leave Kevin in there. Probably like a new edition a new edition Ralph Trezvans gone It's not now you're just Bell Biv Devo and Bobby Brown hanging out. There's just still pretty sick
Starting point is 00:07:20 It's good, but it's two bands at that point you Ralph Trezvans that baby voice was the whole thing Yeah, you know, I mean that beautiful if it isn't love voice Damn he rules. Yeah, you know, it's up. You know you want to put on if it isn't love so bad So bad you want to put it on but that route that's the guy that couldn't go there Pointer sisters I couldn't tell you I don't know which ones, which they all are selling aggressive men. He was possibly shopping one of his own friends. Takeoff.
Starting point is 00:07:53 Oh, man. As it didn't sit and escalated with Cuevo. Nailed it. Right at the set. I had to think about it though. I know. I was going to look over you and say a cocky and then as it was coming out of the mouth, I go, am I doing the right one right now? Don't look at me.
Starting point is 00:08:07 Don't you look at me. I am Mr. Mistakes this week. As it's escalated with Cuevo right at the center of it. Oh, so damn, that's going to be a hard guilt. Oh, if he's the one that got in the altercation. Oh, man. And he's not hurt at all and his buddy got killed. Takeoff was believed to be the most relaxed in the crowd What he goes he's mother fuckers fighting again. I'm just gonna post up right over here But that is kind of he he preaches a lot of peace and and he's not he's the quiet guy. Yeah, yeah, damn one of Quavo's friends
Starting point is 00:08:42 Was the first one who started shooting and the first bullet hit takeoff dropping him instantly on the floor More shots were fired right after that But witnesses the scene believe takeoff was killed by the first shot from one of his own crew members damn dumb hey, we got the tape back You killed him and you're like Been in a fight the other guy was in it. Yeah, what if it's getting in the shit over dice? Come on, I mean, that's sad. It's also, again, the problem of not understanding,
Starting point is 00:09:09 like, you really can't do, they just want to say, it's like, so and so keeps it real. But like, method man really couldn't go getting to a rap cipher in the middle of like a statin island projects right now. Do you know what I'm saying? Because everyone's gonna come and say they love them. Someone's gonna come up and be like, fuck that dude. And then I'll be the guy
Starting point is 00:09:26 who shot in the neighborhood. I'll be the guy who killed Method Man. Exactly. That could just happen. Yeah. Or just start shit and be like, you think you're better in this model? We don't need to see your shit around. You know what I mean? It's like the people you encounter that just want an interaction versus want a praise. Right. Or like, you know, some people will be like, well, if I come at you sideways, at least you're gonna acknowledge me. Yeah, as I'm saying, like, and it could, by the way, most of that day will be kids running up to him and being excited and adults coming down
Starting point is 00:09:53 to give him respect, but it just takes one asshole who's got a chip on his shoulder to make a problem. It's really just can't hang out at a dice game in a bowling alley anymore. You can't just go out. Those days are kind of over, take off. What happened to those dice games in Houston, bowling alley? Migos, which by the way is a weird name for a band, isn't that what we get at the place?
Starting point is 00:10:12 We got Migos. Yeah. Migos is the male of those. Exactly. It means it has more chorizo. Yeah, chorizo. I didn't get to, I mean, we should take off. Rest in peace, take off.
Starting point is 00:10:26 We should try to think of any other three person bands. Oh, we'll get, I don't think we're done with this. Commodores, by the way. Yeah, call in, that's a good call topic. Commodores, Lionel Richie left, I would've said Lionel Richie left, that was the thing. Banged in another big hit. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:41 Without him. I bet, yeah, so again, the phone number 8669 1969 1969 before we get too far down this Rattlehole because this is something that we can go sure. I didn't get to talk about it yesterday. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I wanted to say You know big news in my life in Danland in my yeah, Katie and I got engaged and my, yeah, Katie and I got engaged. Hey. Dropped. Yeah, buddy. It was very, it was very nervous.
Starting point is 00:11:10 I mean, I wasn't really nervous to ask. I was just nervous to do it. I didn't want to fuck up. Cause we were, we went away to an upstate and we were like, by a creek. And I was like, man, there's so many elements right now. I could fumble the ring, but she said yes, and it's funny because it was like,
Starting point is 00:11:26 it occurred. That'd be funny if you were building up to tell, she said no. And she shut me down. She was like, let me think on it. She took the ring and went, ew, and threw it in the river. I know, man, she was, I completely surprised her.
Starting point is 00:11:39 So that was the best part. I think some proposals, people, I kind of set it up and the girl tells the guy what did she didn't even know This thing was fucking coming. Oh, yeah, so you did all the stuff right? Yeah, it's the family. Yeah, I Like back in June before I went to London. I was in Boston dropping the dog off and her parents were in the kitchen And I was like hey, I just want to run this by you guys because it's the only time I'm gonna be by you like alone Is it cool if I ask you to marry me? And they were like, fuck yeah, they were like,
Starting point is 00:12:06 very supportive. Yeah, you're fucking coming to the family. What's going on? Yeah, big headed fucking weirdo. But it was great man. And then I called her brother before the Wednesday bonfire last week when I was getting dunks. And I was like, hey, I'm gonna ask Katie to marry me.
Starting point is 00:12:22 He was like, not queer. And he goes, no dude, fuck you. I was like, hey, I'm gonna ask Katie to marry me. He was like, he's not queer. And he goes, nah, dude, fuck you. I was like, yeah, Kevin Rules. So it was, it was, man, it was fun. It was very cool to do that. It felt very grown up. Hell yeah. Yeah, and I'm excited.
Starting point is 00:12:35 I don't think it's hard that night. Banked so hard. No, we did demolition man sex. What's that? When we put on those headsets. Oh yeah, you guys just you had touched hands. I experienced each other. Yeah, it was a demolition man sex. You guys get to explain this one another? Yeah, we would do it maybe you can use those shells. Do you remember
Starting point is 00:12:57 the video? It's like lips. Yeah, yeah. Dan, did you have Katie that evening? I did, did you take her? Did you take her? Do we've been doing a joke kiss thing? Where we kiss each other? You know like it just saying goodbye or whatever but then we do that what? I love you When I heard graduation. Thanks. Oh, fuck it awesome When I heard the news I wrote an open letter that I would like to read to the both of you now. Oh, absolutely To heaven Katie. Yes, absolutely. To him and Katie. Yes.
Starting point is 00:13:27 Okay. Can we get... We're gonna get this audio... I gotta get this audio in there. Can we get this audio in there? Can we get this audio in there? I gotta get this audio in there. This is very sweet, right?
Starting point is 00:13:34 Not too crazy. Okay. Keep it... keep it classy. He's like... Yeah, I like that. Little lower. Easy. Yeah, I like that. Little lower. Dear Catherine and Daniel, congratulations to one of my favorite couples and my very
Starting point is 00:13:55 first celebrity power couple. Wow. Tom and the Cole, George and Amal, Ellen and Portia, can't hold a candle to the two of you. I truly love seeing how the two of you complement each other so well, and, with the world as dreary and as divided as it is, seeing the two of you makes me think of the line spoken by the great Willy Wonka who once said, and so shines a good deed in a weary world. I think it's almost like funeral level. Catherine, as you are well aware, you are marrying a man of great compassion, humor, nor did good looks and height, but also someone I know
Starting point is 00:14:49 to have a great moral compass. From day one, this man treated all of us on the bonfire, strangers though we were in the beginning as equals, and I have no doubt that he treats you the same, but with even more love sprinkled on top. So I take great joy in saying to you, well done young lady and you go girl. I say this of Catherine. This is no show pony. Congratulations on finding a woman with a wit that puts most comics to shame and has a beautiful soul to boot. Since you and Catherine met, I have seen you become happier and more content than I have ever seen you before. At long last you have found your misalysubeth. I love the good line, dude. Before you met each other, perhaps your lives seemed to be ones befitting the LMU. A world of murder and intrigue, but that is in your past.
Starting point is 00:16:08 I'm happy to say to the both of you now, welcome to the HMU. Where single, hunk pastry chefs meet workaholic business women in picturesque winter snow scenes and realize that they were meant to be together forever. And so were the two of you. Except you're better than those TV hymns and bims. You're two wonderful people who found each other in this crazy world and I look forward to the real future you make together. I wish the two of you great love, happiness and success. Jacob. Thank you very much. Jacob,
Starting point is 00:16:52 that's very lovely. You went on Capella at the end like I'm an M. Right, please have that letter. Thanks, buddy. I love you, dude. Thank you. I didn't wait a letter but I thought of a fun thing to call you guys would be a Kate Yolk Noader. Love it. That's like your benefit thing. Dude, Kate know her. Yeah, that sounds fucking badass dude. Kate you'll know her Thank you, Jacob. Thanks guys. Congratulations. Yeah, I you know, that knows a miscommunication I was like I don't go posting or whatever, but I you know, I love you guys. Yeah, so later We didn't talk about it all yesterday and Dan came today and he was like I was bummed I thought we were gonna talk about no one brought both you engage me yesterday
Starting point is 00:17:27 And I was like I thought you said in the text like you didn't want to tell people you're like, oh no I mentioned like right then okay I'm like I would do look like dick so everyone just like Yeah, I guess bands engaged or whatever. No man. Yeah, it was damn me with fiancee You have to say that now you deal though. Yeah, I call her I call her future wife fiance my fiance my fiance Lee I've been saying excuse me. Are you mr. You a fiance? I came to Danest were a wedding ring. It's gonna look so funny I'm gonna ding it against the mic Dave Smith rocks is yeah, I told her I was like I'm gonna get one of those
Starting point is 00:18:03 Cobalt black one Yeah, do yeah, I want one of the ones that looks like fucking see scrolls. I don't know. Kittetoo's broke. Yeah, I told her I go we should get fingers. I told Katie I was gonna get her an engagement ring that herder when she took it off like she got Kelly. She got Kelly and Megan Fox that loves pain. You see they went as Pam and Tommy for for Halloween. Which fuck off and he did like that. that's such an easy costume for you guys.
Starting point is 00:18:27 Dress up is something funny. They did. He did. He did coke off her tit. Which is definitely fake coke. Yeah. Is she going to kill you? Probably real coke. I'd say it's real coke. They wouldn't put that on social media. That'd be fucking insane. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:38 It's definitely a bit, but like people are like all up in arms about like even if it's in such bad taste. Who gives a fuck shot up? I think it's corny that they win his Pam and Tommy you guys are already sexy. Yeah, something unsex you are Pam and Tommy Yeah, you guys are just that now because he played her him Yeah, he also played I didn't even think that's so fucking corny. Oh, yeah, that's so corny That's like it really is you're just like it I bet they what are they set it being like we're gonna blow your mind like they were like Guess what me and Megan are judging up ads. What are the odds?
Starting point is 00:19:12 What are the odds they went to a party where Tommy Lee was there with Josh out of mind It's ex-girlfriend and then she called him from the bathroom and Josh went man. This is DEF CONFOLLE. This is crazy Okay, let me walk you through it furlough go out there first you're gonna do suggest karaoke say go everybody clap everybody come on now this guy right here so yeah you're gonna machine gonna play you with a movie now it's me and you follow weird, weird. I have a body say, he breathed dominantly. Yeah, it'd be funnier if like, you know, they showed up at the party dressed as like ladybugs.
Starting point is 00:19:53 Like, body danger filled in fucking, you know, the guy, like if they showed up with something where you're like, and I told you yesterday, I saw the person dressed up like Ace Ventura and I was like, oh, that's good. That's like shows a little creativity. Yeah, put on fat suits. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:07 Yeah. Offense really offensive. Heidi Klum's dumb ass dress. That is a worm. And did you see that? No. I mean, the blackly people were met up. Not even a gross worm.
Starting point is 00:20:16 A gross worm. Yeah. Nice. That's what I mean. Heidi Klum goes all the way. I know. Wasn't that the first thing that I think when Pete David Sommas was trying to show me like he's not that into like the Hollywood scene. He was like yeah I got invited to like uh Heidi Clombs big Christmas party. I was like why it? Oh why? No I can't go there
Starting point is 00:20:35 and she was like I was wondering if you would come and bring your big penis bring your big leaders. Yeah um we eat man what a waste of hot. Heidi Croum's Halloween. You know what? She's probably worried because she's so big on social media, she's probably worried that she would have possibly put on an offensive costume. Yeah. There's like list. We looked at a list on Skanks, just they have like offensive costumes. Nobody should wear ever again. And it's like, there's so like some of them, you know, the one that really spun my head. It was like, it's in an unhoused person some of them, you know the one that really spun my head, it was like, it's an unhoused person.
Starting point is 00:21:08 What? And it just shows like a kid dressed like a thing. I go, dude, people who are like borderline homeless still put the costume of bomb. They go, yeah, I put a little coffee grounds on my face. Exactly, they go, they go, they go, they go, they go, it's a little kid dressed like a homeless person. I go, this is offensive.
Starting point is 00:21:23 It's not offensive. Well, what if I told you that this homeless child has bipolar disorder So he's actually probably just practicing for what he's gonna end up doing. Oh, then here Here's a kid cat, but you want to dress him up like a soldier He was a soldier with PTSD last Halloween. He was a soldier and then he got PTSD and now he lives on the street Yeah, it is weird that they're like I'll do and I left the show yesterday I went home. This is pretty funny.
Starting point is 00:21:46 I think I may say this on Skanks, but there was a. These kids got in the elevator with me dressed for Halloween. Yeah. And, um, and one of them was dressed like it was like Charlie Chaplin and Michael Jackson. These two look like like 12 year old white kids. And they, uh, they got off the elevator on the the third floor and then I went up stairs and then I You know I got my shit together to go to skanks and they did a dab
Starting point is 00:22:12 for And I got back in the elevator when I was going down the elevator those same kids got back in the elevator and I was like everything in me to go Jay don't say to this kid your parents are hilarious Because you don't get the irony of what you're wearing and then explain These kids are these wearing the outfit of a man who probably wanted to fuck the person he is right now This is the elevator is going down just like don't become the weird guy in the building dude Yeah, you know it's crazy. I was gonna ask like some guy the old air just said I'm dressed like a pedophile Both of us were pedophiles. Cause chaplain was a pedophile.
Starting point is 00:22:46 So you could be like, you guys were both pedophiles. I think your parents ruled. Yeah, and they go, I think a pedophile is talking to us. No, no, I'm saying you guys are dressed like a pedophile. No, no, no, no, no, I don't wanna fuck you. The guy you're dressed like one of the fuck you. Was that Vishnu, the destroyer? This is Heidi Klum's controversial Hindu goddess costume. This is what she got in trouble for. Why is it controversial?
Starting point is 00:23:07 Because it's appropriation of Blue of Blue mangrove. No, of Hindu. Yeah. Okay. She's not Hindu. She can't dress like the Hindu God. Yeah. Oh, no I was gonna go as Jesus this year. Oh Jesus. But he's Jewish. Yeah, she. He actually isn't a fucked up of people who are aren't Jewish. Pretend to be just like Jesus. Actually, that's our guy. That's kind of appropriating. You're a gory. So.
Starting point is 00:23:33 Yeah, Jesus Christburg, before they changed it at the at Ellis Island. That's why I always dress up as Peter or Paul. Jesus Christ in the steam. Christowitz. Christowitz. Are you Jesus? Are you Joshua Jesus Christ the wits? The H is for Hime.
Starting point is 00:23:51 Jesus. Hime Christ in birth. Boy, and you know what he said when the nail went in? Oy ve. Dad, I'm telling you. No, my money counting hand. Dad, forgive them for their old mishukina.
Starting point is 00:24:07 What are some of these calls I can't read it my laser eyes. Okay, we got Jim's easy top. First one who could have died was Frank Beard, the drummer. Who did die? No, Dusty died. So actually the wrong again. That was a rough one. But the order, Jim you Jim, you're there.
Starting point is 00:24:31 I'm here. Yeah. The order to be correct is, uh, of course, Billy Gibbons dies. That's the end of it all together. Done. Dusty was the second most important Frank Beard being the one they could they could tour without Frank Beard. Oh, they carried on right without without. Weird. One of the guys with the beard. Say again, you got to at least have one of the guys with the beard, you know, I think you really, I think in order of importance, doesn't mean they're going to die in that order. One of the beard guys happened to die first and they had, they did move on without them. But listen, so did TLC without left die, which I thought
Starting point is 00:24:58 was a weird move. What if there, what if your Billy Gibbons and you're like on tour of ZZ tommens, one day you come out shaved and you go Is this is itchy? It's hot and you just need it. Yeah, we need it if you want to do a residency in Vegas in this Vegas heat I cannot have this fucking face cunt So I would you agree Jim that Billy Gibbons most important dusty second Frank Beard third They lost the second most important guy. Yeah, they lost second most important guy Sublime thank you Jim for the call
Starting point is 00:25:27 Eric says I don't know the band of sublime enough to know the beastie boy. Yeah, well sublime sublime. It did happen Bradley Noel died And then he and then the band kept trying to go on as like dub city all stars I think they called themselves so blind. No, it's with Rome. Sublime with Rome. Yeah, that's what it is. And so they've tried to go, but it really didn't work. You lose Bradley in your fucking Benzo.
Starting point is 00:25:53 It's done, but listen, I mean, journey is such a lightning in a bottle. They did it, man. They moved on. They did it twice, didn't they? Didn't journey move on and then go get that kid from the Philippines later? No, the Philippines was the kid that invigorated their thing to go. Oh yes, they did have other singers before for sure, but like it just wasn't working out. They didn't go Steve Perry kid from the Philippines.
Starting point is 00:26:16 No, no, no, but when they got kid from the Philippines that was the jam. That's right. You know, that is like, uh, Steve Perry was the original singer. Well, yes, Steve Perry was the second wife Well, that's why the Filipino teenager the Filipino teenager was like fifth on the list. He was like fifth wife You know, but he's the biggest I went to Cambodia and I met Cheryl and that's why we're mayor But he's the biggest they've been but they like since Steve Perry. Oh, he's got in the biggest they've been Jay these are proving your your whole theory wrong like all these replacements are actually doing well
Starting point is 00:26:46 No, no, but they found a Replacement that did very very well by the way TLC could still sell tickets and stuff not saying that I'm just saying the order of importance yeah, and there's can be somebody in a group that ends it sometimes I thought Steve Perry would have been that guy for journey did not work out that way But in order for them to come popular touring again, he really don't make new music. Jacob, even though they don't make new music, they've gotten popular again because he's singing them with the same exact voice. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:14 He's doing a perfect cover. Perfect. So it's you're going to see journey and just close your eyes and believe you're seeing some change. That's what Alson Chains did with Lane Staley. Absolutely. Same move. The guy has his voice. Yeah. It just sounds like it's Lane Staley.
Starting point is 00:27:28 It's pretty insane. Um, um, um, I see what other calls are. Oh, Falcon. He calls. Falcon. He says TLC is still touring. Yeah. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:27:40 Uh, put on Stephanie. You're Steph. Hey, Falcon. Hey, TLC is still touring. Thank you, Katie's lifelong friend. Oh, and by the way, the reason you guys know my husband as plus one is because I also felt do she's saying the term fiance.
Starting point is 00:27:57 Oh, nice. Oh, well, I'll make Dan feel like a douche because he's somebody's fiance there. fiance. fiance Dan? I think he feels uncomfortable saying it. So did I, it so did I that's why I also come from the world of billions so we say finance yes is my fine finance here
Starting point is 00:28:12 you know he said that's his marriage like faan said sorry mhm mhm mhm you want to get mhm mhm mhm mhm mhm you want to get mhm mhm mhm mhm momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma momma Back to boys the one that you said right off the rip could have left did leave for six years and they went on time without no one even notice Yeah, yeah, we even know that this is the first we've heard of it. Yeah, he was gone from like 2006 to 2012 and then he came back that's so funny. We go skies. I'm back And like we didn't even know what's funny new kids in the block. There's one guy who if Danny would gone No one thinks about it for two seconds
Starting point is 00:29:04 Poor Danny Wood. Who is the little one, Joey? Joey McIntyre, big part of that group. In fact, he helps out Donnie Walberg resource fall in a part. Unfortunately for the rest of the group, Walberg name has made him probably the biggest celebrity in the group.
Starting point is 00:29:17 Yeah, Walberg is. So actually in a weird way, Donnie Walberg's talentless voice is maybe the first guy who couldn't be gone on you kids in the block, then the night brothers. No, then Jordan Knight, then Lil Joey McIntyre. And then the other two, Jonathan and Danny Wood fucking toast, dude. Don't let the door hit you.
Starting point is 00:29:40 Easy choice if you can only save three. I got the, I use it LFO as one one member left which i actually thought they had no matter i thought all of them died do you know about that that's a dark it to the two that had all the solos died like so it's just the one guy he towards his lf o he tours with o town who is minus their main heartthrob hunk guy ashley so he did lfFO is no he just left to do his own thing You want to go hot out in the wild They all have to go to mega amounts of a therapy to erase the memories of Lou Perlman fisting their assholes
Starting point is 00:30:16 There's a therapist in Orlando that has a six story house because of all the stories he's heard about like there's an Alan You know for comics but for boy band guys. And he goes, dirty fuck here. Well, of course, you open the door that, yeah, therapist opens his door and sees a guy with, with beautiful curly hair and two earrings in his thing and he goes, loop her all my guy. Yeah, yeah. In a pool shaped like a music note.
Starting point is 00:30:42 That's great stern speaking of how it's turned. Has that guy, Kevin Kronronin I want to say his name was. Is that his name Stephanie rich, yeah, rich, and he would go on Howard Stern and he gave he tells the whole story, but he's such a just a dude from Boston, which is so far. Oh, you know, it's fine. That just hit me. You're from Massachusetts, Stephanie.
Starting point is 00:31:02 That's why you're in all these bands. They're hometown heroes. But yeah, he're from Massachusetts, Stephanie, that's why you're in all these bands. They're hometown heroes. But yeah, he would tell the stories like, I was like, oh, I love both the only one I brought up that is from here. You're the one that brought up new kids. Yeah, sorry, I love Boston boy bands. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:15 Sorry. I find a closet, I find a closet with all the like tiger beat pictures cut out. And you're all about Massachusetts boy bands, specifically, whatever, that's my boy bands. Specifically, whatever. That's my vintage, dude. Whatever. I'm sorry I like that.
Starting point is 00:31:28 You're all about it. Yeah, you do. Boston boy bands in my jam. If you're a group of boys dancing and singing from Boston, Jay's, Jay's, Jay's, Jay, you got Jay. I'm trying to think of boy bands. Who do I say is the better? Has to be someone's the best.
Starting point is 00:31:43 It, new additions got a few that I love. But most of the, I don't really love like cool it now and like the, just like the, their, candy girl. Yeah, they're bubbly like kid songs. If it isn't love is around the first time I was like, yeah, these guys rock, but that's not my favorite of them.
Starting point is 00:32:01 It might be, you know, rock careful. Yeah, this is a, this is a sticky because I was young with new kids around. So new kids on the block, you're like, they were the biggest boy band when I was young, but then backstreet boys, hangin' tough rules. You got the right stuff. Right stuff. Step by step. Ooh, baby. Yeah. Joey back in tires. Solo, please don't go girl. Please don't go girl. Please don't go girl.
Starting point is 00:32:28 Oh, dude, dude, it might be the boy, it might be the boy. MKOTB might be the ones. Might be New Kids on the block. But in a reality is actually no. It's probably in sync. But here's the thing about in sync. It's all Justin, dude. Well, it's the calves with LeBron.
Starting point is 00:32:43 It really is all him, but you know, the songs with them. Also, when they have, they also have a wrap up here instead of that a lot of these other bands didn't get to have. This is something when we were talking, I was talking about this with Katie, we were talking about boy bands, whatever, and she was like growing up, I lacked confidence. So I always liked the second guy, because I felt like, oh, yeah, the most terrible. Oh, dude, me too. She's like, JC Shawse. She felt like, oh yeah, the most attainable. So she would be like, I like she like, JC Shaw, she's like, fuck Justin, I like JC Shaw say. Buddy, I would talk myself into having a crush
Starting point is 00:33:13 on Mindy Cone Natalie from Facts of Life because I was like, well, if those girls I could probably get her. And I could hang out and like, you know, maybe I'll catch fucking a Blair in the shower. See, I wasn't about Blair, who was was the the the brunette Joe Joe. I was like dude I'll probably take Joe she could call me a pussy I'll punch her in the arms.
Starting point is 00:33:31 You know what a thought Blair I mean you wanted to get there to see Blair be like I may have to fuck it I may have to suck on Natalie's fat gross tit. Yeah there's a good chance that if your friend thought they could get JT they're probably their best days are behind them now. I would have rather fuck cluelessech moon when she was in that show of the Natalie. He remember Natalie from Facts Life. Fun Fact was a blowfish.
Starting point is 00:33:54 The janitors played his wife on 21 jump street. Yeah, she plays a knowing Jewish wife. Yep. Shout out, sixth and jump. It'll be back. It'll be back. It'll be back. Yeah, but the LFO guy with that Boston voice. He's just telling that it's so funny
Starting point is 00:34:10 He's like, yeah, I think I was coming over. He's like, yeah, I just want to watch you like, you know Like just want to look at your cock a little bit I think it's weird. I'm just like, no, what the fuck? I'd be like, no, then he gave me a car And then I drove the car and a year later they were like you owe all this money for the car I said, I wouldn't look at my weiner whatever. Yeah fucking which by the way I'd be like, no, then he gave me a car, and then I drove the car and a year later, they were like, you owe all this money for the car. Because I wouldn't look at my weiner, whatever. Yeah, fucking, which by the way, you're that age, they're gonna give you a new car.
Starting point is 00:34:31 I'm gonna look at your weiner. Oh, buddy, he was saying the whole, I would've looked at my weiner for a car. But no one was asking to look at my weiner for a car. No one's asking to look at my weiner at all, for that matter. Dude, I remember, like, thinking about that, you know, like, when you're like, when you're like thinking about that, you know, like when you're like When you're like a younger guy and you think like if a guy did that I'd be like fuck that
Starting point is 00:34:51 Like putting a position like that. Show me your penis and I'll give you a card. I'd be like this Fuck you fucking weirdo and you think about it just to show it My boss fucked with me at Pudge Brothers pizza and Aurora when I was a deliverer And we're smoking a joint for snouted training when I like rode around with my friend and so how to deliver pizzas I think I told you this we're smoking in this guy Josh redhead. He was like super into metal and he goes Here's my boss and he goes damn How do you feel about the how do you feel about white supremacy? What anyway, how do you feel?
Starting point is 00:35:26 I don't know. I don't know. It's kind of fucked up, right? And he goes, God's plan. What if you just gave a crazy answer? He goes, I'm completely fucking with you. I just wanted to see how you would react and go, I think that's something a man says when he's actually in the white supremacist.
Starting point is 00:35:40 No, but I just remember locking up and being like, I don't what? I know you know what it was. He goes, how do you feel about the Aryan brotherhood? You know it out what? I don't know. I was like, fuck it with you. Oh, there are the people who are usher in the final solution. I don't know. I'm a soldier.
Starting point is 00:35:59 I'm an Anglo-Saxon warrior. Let me join your tribe and fight for you. Is Rich Krone the one who's still alive? for you is rich crowned the one who still alive steffi no resisted one that died uh... the one that the liars and the name is brad brad some weird
Starting point is 00:36:13 last name i can't pronounce but i think his name's brad and he has to extra microphone stands with speakers hanging off of them and remembering of his brothers uh... please bring that video up black Blackloo, if you can find it. Oh, man, that's a bummer. Is it true that Rich Cronin died because Chinese food made him sick? It's a dick.
Starting point is 00:36:32 He goes, now your friend has colitis. It's diverticolitis. And we believe it's caused from Chinese food. A lot of bones that fish. Tiny holes in the intestines and he's suffering. Brock Lesnar survived it, but your your friend will not Chinese food made him sick Get a peanut allergy a lot of peanut sauces A lot of peanut based sauces turns out he's an appeared allergy
Starting point is 00:36:54 They kept getting a bunch of peanut sauces. He loved that peanut sauce. This is an early food allergy song We didn't even know this summer Chinese food makes me because I don't know I want to go meet girls guys, but I am just blasting watery shit I'm I'm driving a jettacus a guy looked at my wiener I got a new see off Dropping a great potty at grand prix Checked old man made me watch him masturbate. I watched a guy who looks like a professional polka player jack off. Holy saying about Paul Revere.
Starting point is 00:37:30 Damn, duty really does. Dude, O-town. Is it just him by himself? I mean, he can carry the load. Was O-town that was that I'm making the band? Yeah. It was, right? Always got back up, people.
Starting point is 00:37:44 Do you think P. Did diddy finger these guys this wasn't p diddy sing wasn't no p diddy was the band the band but this was when MTV was like we're making a boy band damn dude when you send your prettiest boys over it's so weird to be in a world where you think that's that. It goes, hey guys, sorry, I gotta leave high school. I gotta go dance in the air hump. What is that? I'm gonna go dance air hump and sing really high-pitchy songs. But you know what it is, is that is like them getting called up to the majors where they go, oh, you thought I was cute for Mrs. Smith's social studies class. I'm hot enough that a wrist of records
Starting point is 00:38:26 is willing to put $200,000 in, let me get brutally molested in early. I'm going to go for it. We know Joey McIntyre when he sings that beautiful girl song, it's like a little girl. Yeah, bring your new gun on the block. We do gotta take a break. We do the go-kid.
Starting point is 00:38:41 It's, dude, you know what they're doing? They're harvesting a dream of chrome. Oh, totally. When hot little boys sing like girls, they're adrenaline levels go up. They're gonna go up and that's been time when you cut their heads off and suck their neck blood. This is a preview of Thursday show.
Starting point is 00:38:54 And then the globalists, the cupol of globalists drink their dream of chrome. We've said it twice because we watched a documentary. By the way, for Thursday show, you should watch, on Peacock there is a documentary series called Shadowland that we watched and mid-phone of yes big J Okay, I can't see it. Look at it. Number two This is great. I
Starting point is 00:39:13 Can't see it. I want you to see it and then see we should take it. See what it says. Yes We have Chris Chris online too Chris what's going on buddy Chris? Well listen, you know, I hate it when people don't you you say you hate when people don't use the terms for Starbucks sure Monday doesn't mean large. Oh What Ground day that's how fucked up it is. Ground. It doesn't mean large man that means large, but that's That's Italian. Oh my god. We got a talk quick we're doing a uh... we're doing a real quick
Starting point is 00:39:47 like year kind of in review i know it's like almost the end of the year what do you think it is your favorite moment of the show so far of twenty twenty two well you know your podcasted pretty out of this world and you guys are just filthy funny thanks who's your favorite on the crew Well, you know you can you know rich you guys both sound similar. I mean you guys are almost like brothers are you guys related?
Starting point is 00:40:13 Yeah, we actually we're second cousins which a lot of people don't know our parents her cousins All right, yeah, there you go that's you that's all a D. It a man. Oh man. I'm telling you brother It is it's wild that we ended up here. Do you know the phrase of pace? Hey guys, oh man. That's two tickets coming to you for Iron Maiden's Barley Center. We got it That's wacky so that guy guy, he called the wrong show. And Black Blue, I heard him on the phone go, yeah, I don't, what? I don't think you're calling the right show. And he's like, no, I am.
Starting point is 00:40:52 What did he say, Black? He wanted to say that a Grande isn't, he was Grande isn't a large a star by the way. I'll tell Chris. Whatever it was like, Kavino's got it wrong. I'm like, okay, hold on, hold on. Oh man, you should have told us that. Oh, you should have told us that where he thought it was
Starting point is 00:41:05 Kavita on Rich. I would have played that. I was very confused. I knew he thought he called the wrong show, but then it started thinking maybe he did call the right show. When he said he loved the podcast, I was like, oh, closer warmer. We do put this out as a podcast. Who's your favorite on the crew anyway? Oh man, Kavino's and you're like, got him. Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, we got him.
Starting point is 00:41:27 Oh, we're bringing up. you have new kids on the block. Do you have that Joey solo? Oh, man, so Back when back when boys could sing like what a twinkler. This is probably the first time I I said the f word in my life When the girl I liked was super the girl my friend Jamie my god dude my friend Jamie can you bring up the video because this is almost like Donkishay it's almost like Donkishay where you can't believe a boy is singing this damn they might be they might be the greatest boy then of all time they might be the greatest boy band of all time. Look at all those haircuts.
Starting point is 00:42:25 You know, DJ Lewis melding everywhere. I mean, even the actual like he knows the way it goes. Damn, look at that Vidal set soon here. Yeah, by the way, stop hitting on AT-Rolls you boy. Look at him. Love girl. Yes. I'm a love girl. I'm too late.
Starting point is 00:42:42 Love girl. But that's, uh, that's just nature, dude. Girls fall in love, they have to like pretty boys at first because You know facial hair and all that stuff's gonna scare the shit out of them at that age. That's like it's too intimidating So they need a little girl boy to like Yeah And then unfortunately several those girl boys gay And then unfortunately several of those girl boys gay Then you end up marrying a gay and then you get angry when he starts cheating on you with dude And you don't realize you've been conditioned the whole time by boy bands
Starting point is 00:43:12 And you get a fucking dookie infection in your twat because he's out there I'm a buttz-bomb on your back cuz he's a bad house. It's taking it Then you get due to infection in your twat. Then you get septic, septic, some more whatever. I can't even go over it though. You're septic, septic. Yeah, this guy's coming turds into your... ...cute. Friend, you're my love.
Starting point is 00:43:36 My love and thing. Yeah, this song blows. I liked hangin' tough though a lot. I like when Donnie Walbrook tries to get angry. Yeah, dude, hangin' tough though a lot. I like when Donnie Wahlberg tries to get angry. Yeah dude, hangin' tough? Yeah. Mark? Mark what about that? That's like, what? Mark what about that? That's like, what? Mark Wahlberg, you were really scary in there.
Starting point is 00:43:53 Well this is when he started some- Hey Donnie! I'm not gonna lie! That coming pretty scary! Well hangin' tough, I think, is the album where they're like, yo, we all have to get like a thing. Yeah. Like we're all a thing. We're just four guys before and they're all gonna do it and donny wallberg is tough guy. Yeah, remember and together with Kevin Farley It was a show on MTV about a fake boy band and they played up all like the Yeah, but the each guy's gonna be a thing. Yeah, dude. What's our thing in here? What's our fucking boy band thing? Lose obviously the bad boy. I think I'm the bad boy here
Starting point is 00:44:26 Probably oh maybe a little now you're right DJ low DJ lose the bad boy, dude Yeah, Jacob's Joey Mac and Tyre little Joey Mac and Tyre I would say I would say am I Donnie? No, you're Donnie are you Donnie who's I am probably a Donnie? I'm like I uh, I would say, am I Donnie? No, you're Donnie. Are you Donnie? Who's Donnie? I'm probably a Donnie. I'm like, I feel like I'm Jordan. You're Jordan. And I'm Donnie. You for sure.
Starting point is 00:44:52 And you're Danny. I'm sorry. Like, we're Danny Wood or his gay brother, Jonathan. Right. We're going to do Danny Wood. He's in great shape. All right. Well,'ll all do our parts now Gonna get dropped Don't cross our backs you mentioned getting sun to by this group of five guys Don't you're gonna get stomped and then them doing it Do you think there's like actual tough guys?
Starting point is 00:45:42 Oh wait the next way goes you're rough Do you think there was actually like a bad ass dude in the 80s those just listen to this goes yo I just like them don't fucking give me gruff Dude boy band tough is a certain love I want to call a man boy band tough your boy band tough right now You're being real boy. They try to get that like like Tim really would do things where you like box song like like throw punches on Boy, you can't be Gotta song Fucking fight you every boy bands got a song about them being bad for sure. I'll fight you
Starting point is 00:46:21 We're out in the streets back streets back all right. That's not tough though. That's just been cool Man I forgot how bad this sucked. Yeah, yeah, I mean my when this came out You're a team. Well, you're not letting this you're not letting yourself get put into a trance with a funky song Yeah, you got to get funked in yeah, and then Jacob don't worry about nothing goes. I won't hang on Just get on the floor. I do that new kids bang Wayne. That's why I love you so much. Kavino Yeah, that's why I love you too Yeah, this was there like This was our first off shout out Nick Carter rocking the sick Warren sap bucks Jersey
Starting point is 00:47:01 And this was massive. This is when T, like a TRL was at its height. This is, I remember this one, the summer I started really J and O, dude. Really, I could beat to most things on MTV that summer, not this. This would come on after I came and I'd be like, this is gay. Now this is when they're all moms.
Starting point is 00:47:18 It's like, what is this? But then I was like, it's good makeup. So, oh, oh. But then I was like, it's good makeup. So... Oh, he is. Oh, oh. Oh. Damn.
Starting point is 00:47:29 Poor AJ. Nobody told him about the fucking... No, I'm told him about space hair, dude. Dude, you could have had a space wig by now. Just chop the back of your head off and put it on your top. I just went for it. He just went for it. He's like, yep. I'm bald and young, everyone. He's a bald king, dude.
Starting point is 00:47:43 Respect him. So now if we're doing backstreet boys, who are we? I think Lou might be AJ McClain. Yeah. He's on that red face. I don't know, it'd be Raffi. To him might be Raffi. I might be, I'm just gonna say, I think I'm,
Starting point is 00:47:56 I think I'm Raffi. He might be Raffi's fucking Walmart. Oh. Who am I? It's gonna hurt. You're Nick Carter. The gay? No, he's not gay. Nick Carter's gay now? Yeah, Nick Carter's got that he's got you know
Starting point is 00:48:07 He's got he likes the fashion he takes a lot of chances. You're definitely Nick Carter That you damn Raffaise face. Alright! Yeah, it's not tough. No, it's right way to go. I'm back to the back of the game. I just...
Starting point is 00:48:28 Yeah. I'm back to the face. I'm back to the face. I just... I just... I just... Yeah. I'm back to the face.
Starting point is 00:48:36 I'm back to the game. I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just...
Starting point is 00:48:44 I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... Getting your- Hey, Jay McClanon. Get a- Getting your girl taken by a guy in a boy band, which there are Thousands of men out there who have felt that wrath And just losing her- No, you don't- Not even losing her because he's in love with her now losing her because she did everything- She sucked fifteen dicks to get backstage and sucked his dick And you're just like-
Starting point is 00:48:59 And you can't look at her anymore And that song's everywhere. You walk in a CVS and it's playing and you just punch a cereal box That's true, wow I would love to know if someone ever had their girlfriend cheat on them with a with a boy band If that has ever happened please 8669 699 Oh my god Bobby was if you think about it Bobby was in the boy band of comedy Yeah, tourgasm tight jackets tight leather jacket dane cook Gary Goldman Bobby Kelly J Davis all Think about it, Bobby was in the boy band of comedy. Oh yeah. Tourism? Tight jackets, tight leather jacket.
Starting point is 00:49:26 Dane Cook, Gary Goldman, Bobby Kelly, J Davis, all stylish hats, all very thought out hat. Rip jeans like a sunbitch. All day long. All day long, very stylish hot guys. Fuck him out of wet pack again. Hey dude, where you from? No dude.
Starting point is 00:49:43 Yo dude, where did you grow up? Hey dude where you from? No dude. Yo dude where did you grow up? This what I mean? Hey motherfucker you know what dude? You know what dude? Hey there Danny you know what dude? China? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:58 What's you Jay? You're the mummy. I'm off man. It's you Jay you're the mummy a Wolfman And my sex you whoa Jacob your howie the little little uh Now who's color me bad importance. That's a goody too. Oh, man. I don't know I tell you there I say the black guy and color me bads the least important what they never gave him in anything solo Colour me bads right before my time. There's no such thing
Starting point is 00:50:29 They buddy they leap generations. Is that the one with the Kenny G looking guy? Yes Kenny G I do remember color. We bet you we gotta take a break Here's a thing it's to get the thing though color me bad the Kenny G guy major part of the production though All right, let's get back with it. We can keep this going, it's our radio show, we can do whatever we want. I can do whatever I want, sovereign nation. It's our nation.
Starting point is 00:50:50 I'm a sovereign, I'm a sovereign citizen. I don't acknowledge, I don't acknowledge your FCC rules of the advertising schedule. We bring it up, big gym. I don't acknowledge time. We bring it up, because I don't even know what the fuck you're talking about. I'm the time cop.
Starting point is 00:51:02 I call time cop. Not my satellite radio. Let'm the time cop. I call time cop. Not my seat not my satellite radio Let's take a break. Okay We'll be right back. Sponfire And that's coming from rat phase You've been listening to Sirius XM's bonfire New episodes every Tuesday through Friday mornings and full shows always on SiriusXM's bonfire! New episodes every Tuesday through Friday mornings and full shows, always on SiriusXM!

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