The Commercial Break - The Frankie Trap!
Episode Date: April 28, 2023Bryan & Krissy finish Frankie's dating app how-to's AND get into The Love Trap! Together...it's The Frankie Trap. We're back into Frankie B’s dating app tips for women Not a Nudie! Dating Frankie... is the opposite of Love Is Blind: Love is Terrible No bikinis…wait, actually I love that If you have to say I'm not being mean…you probably are He hates when they say they’re not looking for a hookup! Back to you, Frank! Frankie is angry at women! Frankie, Executive Producer of The Love Trap Nelly, Kelly, and Suzelle! We might have missed something in the premise of this show... The housing shortage is because of the influencers! Bucolic surgery? Buccal fat removal? Slow mo' the trap door! LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Maybe I won't get married, you know?
Maybe I'll do one of those eat-pre-love things.
Ugh, no, I don't want to pray.
Forget it, I'll just die alive.
On this episode of the commercial break.
Oh, that's what really gets you, Frankie.
What really gets you is when they're not willing to blow you and leave.
What night?
Yeah.
You know what I hate when they put no Blumkin's allowed.
I hate that.
Me personally.
I want to, I want to Blumkin.
Ha!
Finally, grab.
The next episode of the commercial break starts now.
Darky and Shinnossles.
Ah yeah, cats are getting swung up back to the commercial break.
I'm Brian Green, this is my dear friend.
And co-host Kristen Joy holds me up S.D.U over there.
Krata.
Bessie Bryant.
And Bessie you out there in the podcast.
You numbers.
Without further delay, we learned the last episode.
The Chrissy is not dug into Love is blind.
Season 4 yet.
I'm dying to talk about it, but I can't, because Chrissy doesn't know anything about it yet.
So fuck off.
She's into the yacht club or whatever it is.
Yacht club.
Below deck.
Below the balls.
Yes.
Oh, I just put those two words together
and realize that it's a sentence below my balls.
Below my balls.
Below my balls.
On deck.
Now, what Chrissy does as not seen
and that we have not reviewed yet,
but we've talked about in brief detail.
Is the new dating show sweeping the UK,
the craze that's sweeping the nation of the United Kingdom,
which is, I think it's called the dating trap,
and it's literally where a guy asks someone three questions
and then if you don't get, you know, he picks one
to fall through a trap door an actual trap door
Where she actually falls through the truck door?
Oh my god. I mean, you know, I always feel bad for the contestants on these shows that don't end up getting picked
Yeah
Because it's like you have to go home and know that you're gonna be the loser on the dating show, right?
Like you your love life was bad enough that you had to go on a dating show,
and now you've felt through a trap door on live TV.
What an embarrassment, but hey listen,
it's a bunch of fun for the commercial break,
so whoo, fucking cares.
Um, so I actually have-
Yeah, it seems pretty demeaning that you would
fall through the trap.
Oh, yeah. Terrible, It's terrible to do that.
You're out. Yeah, out.
Boom. So what I would like to do is let's get to Frankie B. First, because we were doing
Frankie B. Last episode. And I want to make sure those who have waited patiently for two
days. Why I don't know. To hear the rest of Frankie B's dating profile
aptips for women. We were right getting into what was what was Frankie talking about?
We've learned so far. Totally contradictory. Yeah. Okay. Let's review. No ponytail pictures.
None. Look your best. Absolutely. Get a professional photographer. Pay that money. No
sunflower. Fucks the flowers. Fuck the flowers. Yeah, fuck the dogs. Does not care
about the dogs. Put him in a cage. Yeah. Put him in a cage. And then but then also
wait, hold on at the end there, he said, you need to look natural. You need to
look natural. And no retouched pictures because you're gonna have to meet
that guy in person and now now
He's gonna tell us what he's looking for. Yeah, but one more thing that you forgot is don't be the Soso girl
You don't want to be the Soso girl. Yeah, no group shots. No, no
There's other girls that are prettier than you if you're gonna if you're gonna do a group shot
Make sure that you have some
Around you and that you're the prettiest one Absolutely. I just surround myself with pretty girls too.
Also Frank revealed that what he does with these pictures,
when he's not just swiping, no, no, no, no, no.
He finds something interesting, he digs in, he dissects.
He scrolls in, he zooms in.
He zooms in, we're assuming at the boost.
The tips, yeah.
Because what else are you scrolling in on?
I know, they're skin complexion. The tits, yeah. Because what else are you scrolling in on? I know.
They're skin complexion.
I mean, come on.
Care.
He's looking for Photoshop tits.
That's what he's looking for, basically.
My nose Photoshop.
Yeah.
But don't do it.
Yeah.
Because he's got it burned as what we did determine.
And it's the basis root of all causes
for the entire series of videos
that he's been doing for five years.
Anytime Frankie B does a dating video where he's acting like a massage artist, which is
every, which is every dating video, it's most certain that he has no girlfriend or he
got, he got the same, yeah, basically it happened to him or he's just gotten broken up with
and he's really angry at women.
So let's scroll back a few seconds and then we'll get to the dating trap
because I think we'll have time.
All right, here we go.
Should you post of yourself,
what are men looking for?
Well, I'm gonna tell you what I'm looking for.
I wanna see a full body shot, not a noody.
If I don't know.
Not a noody.
Not a noody.
The noody.
Not a, I don't wanna know noody there my young lady
I can see grouse your marks like
Send me a noody well, yeah
Why don't we go down to the boardwalk and have them paint your noody
Then I'll take it home with me and I can get it forewamed by the blacksmith on the corner.
Right off the bat here, what's a full body,
full body but no nudity, but I'm assuming
it's less close as possible.
Yeah.
So you can see.
Let's make the assumption that if you did send
Frankie a nudity, it probably wouldn't be problematic.
You know what I'm saying?
Right. I want to see a full body shot. You did send Frankie a newty, it probably wouldn't be problematic. You know what I'm saying?
Right?
I want to see a full body shot.
I want to see what your whole body looks like.
If I come across a profile and the only pictures of that woman are from here up, there's
a reason why.
Or an eyeball.
Yeah.
Just real close to the eyeball.
If I catch a picture where you have zero tits involved,
swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe.
I literally am looking for tits.
Once I see tits, I know I'm on the right.
I'm not.
But not a group size.
That's right.
I want a full taint shot.
That's what I want.
But no nudies.
Don't send me nudies.
And trust me, I've made the mistake not once not twice
But a few times of going with that and when I walked in
700 pounds
When they walked in they were my sister
Yeah, they were my sister because I was just looking at their tits. I've made the mistake.
I made the mistake.
Not once, not twice, but several times.
I was just looking at her face.
Oh, Frankie.
I mean, the poor women in Frankie gets matched with that they actually mean.
I know.
It's got to remember there.
There you probably can do that.
Can you imagine Frankie's profile picture?
Like, what do you think they look like?
I've dying to find his profile?
I know what city he lives in we could create a fake Tinder profile. Let's get Frankie.
It'll look fakey be. Fakey be. To get on that. Yeah let's just ask chat G.P.T. what does Frankie
B's Tinder profile look like as you know they know. And I saw that date it wasn't what I wanted okay
and I was too afraid to ask for a full body shot.
If you're a woman posting only pictures from here up,
I figure you're doing that for a reason.
You're hiding something.
So, be very huge.
Yeah.
It's such a dig.
Maybe they just don't wanna put a picture
that you can Google for 12 hours at a time. Yeah, absolutely. I don't want you zooming in on my tits
so I'm not putting this full picture in there.
Prepare it if you only got those type of photos.
To have a guy ask you what does the rest of your body look like?
Oh my, because it's...
Ah!
Er, head!
It's crazy! I mean, he cares, it's just about looks straight looks.
But no, no, what are your interests?
What do you think can we talk on the phone?
What do you like?
What do you expect Frankie to do?
We have common things that we like together.
I know we've been talking for five days straight
and you know, we're saying I love each other already.
But do you mind sending me a full body shot?
Zoomed in on the most important parts.
You go, Frankie.
I would be like, blocked because that's the root
as question you could possibly ask somebody.
Yeah, send me a full body shot.
Yeah.
This is the opposite of love is blind.
This is love is terrible.
This is what that's called.
I just from here up deck counts, we're looking for the total package.
And that's, I hope that's not the wrong words for you.
It's, it most definitely is.
Yes.
But it's, it's reality if you're a woman and you're looking at a guy in a dating site and all you saw
Was from the neck up. What are you thinking? They're not thinking about that Frankie?
Yeah, they're most women are not thinking about that. They did they want to connect and have fun and go out
Okay, so you show up and she's got four or five hundred extra pounds on her
But listen
You can't have fun with somebody that you don't aren't attracted to the least you could do is just sit through the date and be polite
I mean you don't have to fucking throw a temper tantrum about it at the point
So post a couple of pictures of full body shots
Actually, I love when girls post pictures of themselves in a bathing suit.
I knew it.
I knew it.
Actually, I love Wing Girls' pictures in a baby suit.
I knew it.
Frankie.
Oh my, I knew it. Oh Frankie Frankie
I knew it. He is guaranteeing that he's never getting late again with any woman that's ever seen this channel
Probably not many women watching this channel except for people investigating Frankie, but at the end of the day
This is terrible
Of course he does I mean, let's see he is being honest like let's be yeah, let's be honest
Which guy is not looking for the bikini shot?
I know, but my god, but that's when I was on
I was
Comfortable doing that and when I was on Tinder
I I wasn't looking for girls that just had bikini shots because that seems like bait. It is bait
Yeah, it is bait. Absolutely and then And then I knew I had zero chance.
Like when someone had a bikini shot and they look good in it,
I was like, well, I'm out.
I never connected with the bikini shot, girls.
But plenty of photographs from the head up.
From the chin up at the beach.
It really gives me a great visual.
Really gives me a super half hard.
At my age, I'm lucky to get it all the way me a super half hard
At my age I'm lucky to get it all the way up, but half hardy It really gives me a fish
It gives me a chubby
What that woman looks like again, I've got parameters of what I'm looking for in a woman
And you've got parameters of what you're looking for in a man. What are you a fucking machine shop?
Are you a automobile technician? You've got parameters of what you're looking for in a man. What are you a fucking machine shop? Are you a automobile technician?
You've got parameters.
I've got these parameters on the cooling seats.
Yeah.
Front wheel drive.
Moon roof.
Yeah.
And a clean tank.
Am I asking for too much?
Am I asking for too much?
So just because they have faces, gorgeous and beautiful,
it doesn't mean the rest of her is and I'm not being mean.
Yes, you are.
You are so assorbic right now, like there is nothing nice about what you're saying.
I can't believe he's saying that.
I don't.
But he's on video.
I don't know, woman in my life.
I don't know, one woman in my life who would listen to this
and go yeah, yeah, yeah, he's right. Let me do that. What a nice guy. Right. What a charming young man.
Only trying to tell you we need to see the entire package. Here we are in the conversation and see if
this can turn into a potential
date. Let's talk about the verbiage that you're gonna also post in your site. Oh
God, here we go. He's gonna tell you what to say. Oh, check out my tits.
I love it. I'm only fans. Me personally. I love it. Me personally. I love it. When
you copy and paste another picture of your tits in a bathing
suit inside of your text.
That's me personally, your verbiage.
Right after your picture is going to come to description, what are you looking for?
What are your qualities?
What do you want in a man?
What do you want in a relationship?
Not you.
Not you.
Whatever you are. the opposite of that
Well, and the one that really really gets me is you know not looking for a hook-up not looking for a one-night stand
Oh, that's what really gets you Frankie
What really gets you as one they're not willing to blow you and leave.
One night?
Yeah.
You know what I hate when they put no blumkins allowed.
I hate that.
Me personally.
I want a, I want a blumkin.
Holy crap.
I mean Frankie, you're out, he's out doing himself in the worst way.
When someone says they're not into eating ass on their tender profile
What do you think it really gets me? Yeah is when women put no hookups. Yeah, no hookups because that's what I'm looking for
No one has eating
Becaney shot and I want to get that
Sure, why not? Yeah, that's great
But a lot of the girls out there they probably would be very lucky to get that hook up
Or get that one nice stand
My god
Wow, Frankie is that excited you sure does
buddy
Holy crap, I mean he has lost his mind. Well, he just totally lost me.
Anything that he's saying in his inside voice
should not be being said, oh, I miss you too.
Yeah, but that's what makes his YouTube so great.
Oh, my God, oh, yeah.
Is that he cannot shut up.
He cannot stop himself from saying the inside things out loud.
If he could, then this would be a whole different channel. Period
I said this.
Yeah, not to be mean. And another one that really takes me back is athletic and fit. They
describe themselves as athletic and fit. Well, I have a different version of athletic
and fit than most of the girls that post on there.
Can you blow me and fuck me in 25 minutes? That's what I consider as athletic and fit.
Yeah, but I don't want to say don't let me let that let's not drag it on to tonight.
Let's just get it over with.
Athletic and fit. If you're gonna post that, you better be athletic and fit if you're gonna post that you better be athletic and fit a lot of the girls just because they
You better be an Olympic volleyball player
Just because they work out they're not fit. It's how he's getting ready
He's getting ready to tell you that his version of athletic and fit doesn't often appear when someone puts athletic and fit
They should pictures of themselves and their spandex.
That doesn't qualify you as being athletic and fit.
It says that you're working out maybe one, possibly two days a week, for a half hour.
Okay, that's not athletic and fit.
So stop saying you're athletic.
Wow, Frankie, are you fucking angry?
Are you fucking angry?
You're just that burned by some girl that do this.
Yes, you've got to be kidding me
that you're now going to determine
who is athletic and fit.
Because I see all those muscles on your arm,
but that doesn't mean that your athletic or fit either.
You're just a meathead, that's all you are.
You just go to the gym for three hours every single day.
Who fucking has time for this?
Yeah, and so let me get this straight to,
like some girl somehow, as he said earlier,
it's a feat that if I actually click
on your picture and scroll down.
Let's assume some girl has made it to this point
to where he's looking at the profile picture
She's got everything no ponytail pictures. No dingy clothes. No sunflower no dogs. No
bikini pic
Spandax full body shot whole thing but
But he's not as let it can fit fuck that yeah, fuck that listen to, anybody who doesn't have my body type, a no sportsman like body type, is the athletic and fit.
You know what I'm saying? Like, I'm not here to determine if you're athletic or fit.
I know where the fuck I'm from.
Why are you so angry? Do you tell women in the athletic department they need to get out?
Because you're not athletic and fit.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, Mr. Macy's manager.
We got some not-a-that-a-can-fit women over here. What is that? A size one? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, Boner. Let it fit. You know, the problem comes in that, you know, we're all used to looking at
ourselves daily. We don't see a lot of the changes that are going on in our bodies and
our look because they're so gradual. And over the years, you're putting on pounds and pounds
in pounds. And you're still exercising, but you're still putting on
all those LBs now you're still the fuck are you
Man, I love you 90% of the time. I realize that you're just kind of a big lovable oaf
Who cannot keep his mouth shut?
But right now you're just so angry at women. Why?
Why you care if they put athletic and fit. If you don't think they're athletic and fit, then scroll the other direction.
Why can't someone feel the way that they feel about themselves without you getting involved
in drawing up that criteria? It doesn't fucking matter, Frankie, who care? That he took the
time to actually record this. And then clearly edited the video because there's so many bad cuts in it. edited the video and did not decide to take this out. Tells me that he took the time to actually record this. And then clearly edited the video because there's so many bad cuts in it.
Yeah.
edited the video and did not decide to take this out.
Tells me that he has got no woman
anywhere close to him in his life at all.
And if he does, they're gone quick.
Yeah, who's they are?
They're in place.
I think he's the dick.
Yeah, well don't worry,
he just turns off these videos when he meets somebody.
Just takes all the dating shit away.
Freaking out, so in your mind, you're still athletic and fit because that's the way you
see yourself. But the world, the real world does not see it that way. Athletic. You are
still athletic and fit into your older years of life. Like, yeah, I'm just, I'm determined I'm never going to be 20 again.
Yeah, but the problem is, I mean, this is crazy.
The problem is that he's judging somebody's own version of like their perspective on
themselves. If someone thinks they're athletic and fit, who fucking cares?
Yeah, it's good that you're working out.
Yeah, it's good that you're working out.
Yeah.
Why are you getting, you can tell, you can tell,
that this clearly happened to him.
Yes.
His last girlfriend had a Tinder profile
where she didn't show tits
and she put athletic and fit.
And when he met her in real life
or sometime down the line,
he decided she wasn't indeed athletic and fit.
Now she only worked out one, two, two times a week.
Yeah.
Shit.
If I had 30 minutes to myself,
one or two days a week to do anything it wouldn't be working out
Yet I still consider myself athletic and fit because I'm chasing any fucking jell around
And fit is exactly that so if you're not
athletic and fit
Don't put that in your bio
And and still like have some extra pounds.
You're getting into the minutia that he's getting into.
And the truth is, it doesn't matter what people think of themselves.
Frankie, if you don't think that, swipe.
Why are you telling people not to put that?
You are so out of control right now.
I wouldn't even call him athletic.
No, I just said.
Yeah, that's what I just said. He's not athletic or fit. He's just a meathead. That's all he is. He's just a meathead. No, I just said, yeah, that's what I just said.
He's not a athletic or fit.
He's just a meathead.
That's all he is.
He's a meathead.
Yeah, I'm pumped iron.
He makes his bicep look big.
You think that guy goes out and plays two on two with fucking Korean Abdul Jabbar?
No.
Get wrapped up this video.
But please do before you get yourself in more trouble.
You can't everything.
So your profile picture, that's your number one pick.
All right, that's gonna be your most gorgeous, sexiest photo.
Your hair's gonna be flowing, you're gonna have beautiful
makeup on, you're gonna have gorgeous teeth
and a great big smile.
Then we're gonna...
Ah!
You're making the assumption that every woman
that is watching this video is some super smoking hot hiding clown look alike.
Oh, follow up with all the other picks in your profile.
And remember, incorporate full body shots.
Incorporate.
This coming from the guy who developed the concept of salon, sweez with five, make that four locations in the greater Chicago,
Land Area.
Old hide anything.
And maybe you want to squeeze in a nice photo of yourself by the beach.
I think that's that sexy.
And that's what I look for.
It shows your lifestyle shows that you loved the vacation.
It shows that you love the beach.
That's what I'm looking for.
No, you're not.
You're looking for tit-pigs of girls and bikinis.
That's what you're looking for.
Please, it shows that you like to vacation.
Who doesn't like to vacation?
Which moron says,
ah, vacation, not for me.
Yes, what couple days off work turn off the phone?
Distress for a while go to the beach kick my same fee. Not for me. Not for me.
No, sir.
Will not be buying your bullshit today.
She liked it. Yeah.
I'm taking overtime. That's what I'm doing.
Yeah, I'm taking overtime. That's what I'm doing
here for vacation. Yeah, if you have a picture of you clocking in for overtime, I'm out.
That's what I'm really looking for. That about the tits. If you have a picture of you in a bikini clocking in for overtime, I'm out. Woman that enjoys that. Oh, make sure your fur bitch describes you to a tea and don't lie.
You know, if you put your whole portfolio together,
why is his name just appeared on the screen?
What is that about?
I've never seen that.
I don't know, like he's on the newscast.
Let's go to Frank Bernardo down at the beach with some hot tits.
Back to you.
Back to you, Frank.
Back to you, a dinders headquarters.
We're here today to change the whole system.
If you're a athletic and fit, you're out.
I'm telling you, you're going gonna have great success on these sites. So that does end the video.
Oh, okay, good. Thank you.
Before you get yourself in more trouble.
Oh my God.
Oh God, you know what? I don't even know what to say about that one.
I don't either. I mean, I'm speechless.
It's similar to the one about the party girls.
Like, how to know when you're dating a party girl,
when he was so angry at women, he was just yelling
and screaming about women.
Well, I'll guarantee you, however, he found that party girls.
He probably had the bikini shot.
Of course.
I saw in there.
Of course.
You know, the whole thing, didn't work out, Frank.
No, didn't work out.
Leave it alone.
Drop it.
Go get someone else. Hey, beggars can't be choosers, Frankie.
And my opinion is.
Yeah, he's no one to be.
He's not a man.
He's not a town.
He's maybe a seven.
Maybe a certain age group.
Yeah, for the seven years.
Yeah, I mean, not for the 20 year olds.
Yeah, for the 20 year olds, he's a two.
Because that's his maturity level.
Because they're two year old brothers
act more mature than they do.
Oh my God.
All right, Chrissy.
All right.
T-C-B.
Hey you, guess you.
I hate to interrupt all the fun, but I just want to remind you
that tcbpodcast.com is where you find all the audio and the video, plus you can contact us
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ideas, we're taking them all at 855-TCB-8383. If you want to view the commercial break
in a whole new light, go to youtube.com slash the commercial break to see the fully edited
episodes. You'll love it, or your money back, I promise. While you're at it, hit us I was trolling on the internet as I do like to do and I thought with the remaining time that we have here
I wanted to get into the love trap not the dating trap. Excuse me. It's called the love trap brand new dating show out there in the UK
It sounds like this is perfect for Frankie. Oh, yeah
You're out athletic and fit out
Out out out
Out, out. Peace. Thank you. Out, out, out.
Out, out.
By the way, I just can't, I just can't.
I can't think about Frank Keatingberg.
He says, make me feel like too much.
I mean, he's doing a trap door on his life.
Yeah, well, he is a trap door.
He is a black hole.
Frankie's a black hole.
His head is a black hole.
All right, so without further ado,
I wanted to share with you the love trap
that I caught a couple of months ago on video,
on an online video.
I think this plays
on the BBC or whatever it plays on. But people are all over TikTok and Instagram talking
about this brand new dating show where you literally fall through a trap door if you're
not the one picked. Are you ready? You want to take a listen?
Yes, of course.
All right. So without further ado, the love trap. The love trap. Soon you'll be making your way through the floor
They'll be dancing and music until you don't get picked no more
And sorry
He's on the love trap. Yeah, he's on the love trip. He's the executive producer
He's on the love trap. Yeah, he's on the love trap.
He's the executive producer.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, but I can fit down to the floor.
See ya.
See ya.
See ya.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm flicking fit.
Yeah.
David, if you could name your first suspect, please.
First suspect.
Wow.
What are we in?
They call them suspects.
Or find a game of clue.
Yeah, okay.
So there's a guy sitting in a room full of women
and he's talking to him.
And they're in a lounge.
Go to youtube.com slash the commercial
but you can see this.
David, name your second suspect please.
She's out.
So also to just give some context here,
they're sitting in a lounge, it's one guy,
I guess, naming his three suspects.
Three suspects.
Three suspects.
That he wants to date.
I'd like to say that it's rude to call people
you're gonna date suspects,
but there's been a couple of occasions
where I could probably have called
the people I date suspects in the impending crimes of stalking me.
Maybe you'll third suspect.
Does this guy not look familiar?
This is not like an actor.
I don't know. He's got another reality show.
Beef cakes.
Oh my god, is this so demeaning?
All the girls are sitting there waiting to be picked for the next round.
Yeah, but you say it's demeaning, but then the bachelor and the bachelor at are the
exact same for like, I'm showing you there.
Okay, you know, I think they're demeaning.
You know, I was, please pick me.
Please, please.
You know what I'm watching?
You know what I'm rewatching right now?
Daisy of love from VH1.
Do you remember Daisy of Love from VH1?
Do you remember that show?
It's on, I'll give a minute.
Oh my God, I'm gonna shut out, tooby.
It was the sequel to.
Flavor of Love.
No, no.
Rock of Love.
Rock of Love with the guy from poison.
Brett, Michael.
Brett, Michael.
So the Daisy of Love, I am rewatching on Tooby.
You can watch it, they have a few commercials every episode.
But I have been rewatching it.
And it is absolutely fascinating.
And I believe that it predates the Bachelor
and the Bachelor Ed.
Probably.
And it's the exact same format.
It's just much more interesting
because they bring lunatics who are homeless
onto the show to date Daisy.
And Daisy is smoking hot, super smart.
Like she was like
the runner up on rock of love with vents are not but she was also a
uh... bread michael she was also a famous of base player in a rock band did
you know that that's how she got on the rock of love i did a little research
on daisy now unfortunately she's been in another rehab like thirty times but
what would you gonna do? All these women look non-plussed to be there.
They're all like, I didn't realize I was gonna be
to mean the entire time.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Nally.
How'd it feel?
Uh-huh.
I'm not a feeling.
We're in this together.
We're in this together.
We're in this together.
This is a shitty situation.
When you break your legs from falling through the Oh, I'm not a feeling this together. We're in this together.
When you break your legs from falling through the floor, I'll yell down.
I hope you're going to be okay.
Don't worry.
We're no longer in this together, but surely they have medical staff.
Don't worry. They have medical staff
Don't worry Oh, oh, if you could just be quiet for a second with all the blood-curdling screaming
We're trying to figure out if we're going to date this guy
Whatever his name is
Okay, so it's Nelly Kelly and Susel.
Nelly Kelly and Susel.
No, I can't be real.
Nelly Kelly and Susel.
Susel.
That sounds like a brand new.
This sounds like a brand new microwave-able dinner by Stovetop, the Susel!
A combination of lasagna, tacos, and bell peppers.
You'll be shitting yourself more than usual with Stovetop, Stovetop, Susel.
That's Susel. Sorry Susie.
Susie, is that your real name?
From very short, like along with you, David.
See you guys later on.
I'm here at Five Trees.
Serious.
Yeah, because they, you have to get emotional involved.
I have five involved.
Yeah.
Do you know that this is just like those churches do
when they get people all worked up by repeating, you know,
these sounds and this music over and over again, choruses that crescendo and crescendo these got
the the producers on these shows the editors they do the exact same thing with the music
oh sorry you didn't make it
I saw you're not a suspect one more content I don't have to do with talk to you soon don't
worry what are they doing?
What are they doing?
They're all doing makeup together.
I know, but like a pack.
What?
I'm not seeing what you're seeing.
What's going on?
I need to look at like a few dresses hanging out.
Well, yeah, it's time to get dolled up.
It's a dressing group.
Looks like I guess those are cameras.
Mm-hmm.
Don't worry.
We're all in this together except you're not.
Ha ha.
You just leaving
I'm pissed off I'm not gonna lie so am I David is picked tonight's three suspects
Dark room a Kelly sailor Nelly and Aussie bombshells suzel
Would worry too much. Talkroom, talkroom, Nelly, Kelly, as Suzel.
That was those Kelly and bomb shells.
Bomb shells, Suzel.
That's right.
Okay.
Makeup girls.
One of you will be plunged on a trap door very shortly.
Why would they piss?
Why would they say, well, I'm mad.
I don't know.
I think I'm missing something about this show.
I think like when you go down the trap door, you've been accused of doing something wrong, and now they get to throw you down the trap door.
Tory, we're in this together.
I want to prove that I'm not a trap,
and I'm finding it so annoying that you just believe us.
I don't think it's fair that I've been chosen for.
I'm going to make sure I do all I can to show him that I'm real,
that I'm not one of the traps.
I do not want to go through that trap door.
I'm really...
Oh, maybe you come on this show in what you've do as proof that you'm not one of the tracks, I do not want to go through that track, duh. Oh, I really...
Oh, maybe like you come on this show and what you've do is prove that you're not there to be a track,
to be a thirst track, right, to be just be someone who gets the attention and then goes home.
I'm gonna date with him, like at least you got to go on a date with him.
Yeah, but I'm a bit nervous because I went on a date with him, you know?
Yeah.
So I just hope he gives me an answer.
Me, no. Yeah. It's the biggest thing I want to date with him, you know? Yeah, I just hope he gives me an answer. Me now.
Yeah.
Oh.
I've been thinking about that one other day with him.
Because I went on a date with him.
Yeah.
Ah.
Oh, my God.
I'm putting up a fight and I'm not leaving this mansion.
I want what I want and it is David.
The thing is, like, I do want to stay,
like, I do want to get to know him.
I really do want to stay,
and I do want to get to know him,
except I don't really want to get to know him.
I do want to stay.
I want to stay on the show.
I want to be on the show.
I also want to get famous and show off my beautiful skin
while it's still beautiful.
Like, I like two years.
I kind of get it in.
When I make it clear to David that I'm not a love trap and I'm actually a love match, so I'm gonna do anything it takes
Oh
If I'm a producer on this show I'm throwing down the gauntlet. I'm getting some garfish
Some two necks I'm bringing in Frankie B
Some two necks, so I'm bringing in Frankie B. Prove it.
You said you do anything.
This is what you're gonna do.
I got a half-hard right now.
Hey, you got any beating suit photographs
you want to beat somewhere?
You're not as let it can fit, are you?
Okay, just check it. What do they have to do this slow motion bouncing boob tit?
What you can't see is that now they're coming down the stairs of this mansion because they're
all filmed in a mansion now.
Everything has to be in a mansion.
I don't know why.
But these girls were all getting ready and addressing her.
But now they're all walking down the stairs,
primmed and pruned and all this other stuff.
And they're showing a slow motion walk down the stairs shot
so you can watch their bouncing boobs.
You know what, I think that's why there's a housing shortage
right now, is because of what's being filmed.
It's the fucking influencer houses.
That's what it is.
Seven people get together and decide
they're gonna have a TikTok channel.
Yeah. Of course, we're way too young for that. So I don't want to make
fun of it because it's a thing. And if my kid had an influencer house where he, you know,
he could pay $5 million for a beautiful mansion down in Miami, I'd be living there.
Taken the videos for you. Okay, now they're in a room. I see the doors. Yeah, there's three trap doors that they look like area rugs, but what they really are is trap doors
They look like circular
There are there's their area right they look like rugs, clearly. What a weird room.
Yeah.
Yeah.
A frog in a search.
Oh man, I got the got.
That is a weird room.
You know that there are guys who are building this set
who are like, I got a bay here
when one of these bitches falls through the door.
Welcome to the trap room.
Welcome to the trap room.
Welcome to this guy.
Is this, what, some of these guys who are like kind of beefy and meaty, their heads look so sweet. I'm longer with the trap room. Welcome. This guy, it's just,
what, some of these guys who are like kind of beefy and meaty,
their heads look so small compared to their chests.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, it's weird.
It's a weird look, not this guy,
but not the host, but the other guy.
It's, by the way, the host couldn't be bothered
to put on anything but a t-shirt.
But not like a t-shirt, like a plain white t-shirt,
like I'm wearing, a t-shirt with graphics on it, yeah. That's like, you a plain white tea like I'm where a teacher with graphics on it.
That's like, you know, power sports.
Did he not know?
Can I fall power sports?
Did he not know he would be the host of the show
when he showed up this morning?
They couldn't have found a shirt for him.
Three suspects in front of you.
Very soon you will pick one of those girls who you think is a love trap, and that person
will immediately plummet through the floor.
We'll immediately plummet through the floor.
Don't dance around it.
Don't worry about, don't worry about scaring anybody.
You putty soon, one of you will literally lose your legs in an awful chainsaw accident
after you plummet through the floor when we open the door because I don't know because
entertainment.
Because ratings, that's why.
The mansion.
David, what are your reasons for picking these three suspects?
So my reason for picking the catty is what?
My reason for picking the catty is what?
Oh, I got it.
It's how do you fell asleep during that sentence.
Why?
What day is it?
Wait a minute, show.
Yeah.
I shouldn't have taken all that GHB before, came on.
Obviously the challenge is the main talking point.
And everyone went about it one way,
but you chose a different route.
So it just caused me a little bit of doubt.
I mean, we haven't had a day.
I've hardly been able to have any time with you,
but the time...
I have no fucking clue who you are.
I don't really care.
I just want to be in the mansion with the other Carey bitches.
We have spent, I like you and I feel like maybe you like me, I don't know.
But at the end of the day is your choice.
Nelly, you have been quite reserved and earlier when I asked you about past relationships,
you didn't really want to give that much away, which makes me think maybe...
What are you supposed to say?
Because you're a moron on a television show.
Tell me via your past relationship.
No! How's that?
I don't want 52 million people around Britain
knowing my personal business.
How do you feel about that?
And while you're at it, can you make your head bigger?
It's really disconcerting.
There's something that you hide in.
I think it's quite unfair.
It's because me and you haven't had a chance to get speaking
and you're judging me on being reserved,
but you never really asked me until now why I'm reserved.
So I feel like it's a little bit unfair.
This is the first time you're talking to me.
Yeah, this is the first time I've literally been on camera.
It's spoken to you.
But, you know, whatever, dude. By the way, good for you, but you know, whatever dude.
By the way, good for you, Middle Check,
whatever it is, how we now we have the Susel.
Susel said the end.
That's Susel.
That's Susel, of course it is.
That looks like a Susel.
Yeah.
I'm being judged as potentially someone with boyfriend.
I think she had that bucolic surgery.
Yeah.
You have you heard about that? No. People, oh, it's all the right. Bucolic
surgery. I don't know. Is that really with a bubonic plague in
you? No. Okay. I think it's called bucolic. I don't know.
I'm probably saying it wrong, but it's where you have the fat sucked
out of your cheeks. Oh, no, we're just doing it. Oh,
paper is doing that. We are, we are so plastic fantastic as
the society. And I'm not saying I'll are, we are so plastic fantastic as the society.
And I'm not saying I'll never get plastic surgery because if we made the money on this
show, I'd probably get some Botox immediately.
But Rachel told me to go get Botox 20 years ago.
She was like, you're, you're handsome, but you just need a little Botox here, here,
here, and there.
And I'm like, I'm 22.
What are you talking about?
And is out. Obviously, I'm 22. Hannah. What are you talking about? And this is how obviously I peaked you straight away.
You came in really hot, really strong.
And that made me think, are you just trying
to convince me straight away that you're not fake?
I was a little bit shocked just because I felt like we were
really bouncing off of each other.
And I thought we had really good end.
I thought I was literally bouncing on you dick. I thought we're gonna
energy that way. You know what I was working you off. I thought everything was fine.
We're bouncing again. Where are we here now? I don't know, Suselle. I just, I don't know.
The producer's told me to pick three people. It was kind of a shitty hand job, so I thought, one on Suzhou.
I don't like your name really. Anybody who ends the name with LLE can't be trusted.
Hahaha.
Gee, but I really do want to get to know you
and I think it'll be a shame if I were to go today.
Girls, now it's your chance to explain to David
why you're here to find love.
I'm here to find love just because I've been there for a long time.
I'm not here!
My agent told me it was a pain gig and that's why I'm here.
I've not really met the right guy and since my last relationship I've not been able to
trust men that well.
And I believe that they're going to present me with someone that would be compatible with
me, that he's looking for the same things that I'm looking for.
You made the assumptions the producers gave a shit about what you think?
Suzelle.
I think I'm quite glad, because I've been hurt so many times after the last two years,
that I keep myself at a distance until I get to know them and in the second that you
improve to me about you can trust me and I can trust you, then I let it down a lot more, I guess.
That's why I'm here to find love.
Yeah, that's why you're here to find love.
It doesn't make any sense, first of all, second of all, join the club.
Yeah, everyone's been hurt.
Yeah, you gotta give love a chance.
You know, listen to a song or something.
Do you want to find someone?
And I have been missed around a lot in the past,
and I have been hurt before.
So sometimes I am a little bit more reserved in those ways.
But I want someone that likes me for me,
not for the sexual acts or the fun,
or whatever it was.
Not for all the blue jobs.
I'm just sexual act.
What?
That's kind of weird.
Do you want me to perform a sexual act on you now?
Dominate trick.
I don't know.
God bless.
I respect myself.
She'd be the best looking dominatrix I've ever seen.
She's a attractive woman.
Yeah.
I want that person to respect me.
I think she's a dog groomer.
David, do you have one last question?
She's a dog groomer?
Well, she's out.
Frankie B doesn't like her.
Shouldn't fit each of the girls.
What?
The God worked the job.
She's so weird.
What'd she say?
He said, do you have a boyfriend?
She says no.
She said no. What did she say? Yeah said you have a boyfriend. She says no.
She said no.
What did she say?
Yes, no.
Well, well, yes, that's between him and you.
Yeah, I'm trying to make a decision.
I'm trying to make an important decision.
I don't know what my market value is.
You tell me.
She's no. Definitely not. And time is up.
That was non-informative.
Who do you think?
Yeah, they all.
None of them explain themselves.
Is it a side who goes down the trap door?
No.
But hey, that would make it interesting.
Is a love trap.
This will be your final answer.
That girl will leave through a trap door.
Shh. But hey, I would make it interesting. It's a love trap. This will be your final answer.
That girl will leave through a trap door
immediately
immediately I can't wait. Oh, this is so good
I think it's gonna be the middle one. Is it like fuzzy slippers? Yeah, okay. I think it's gonna be the middle one. That's my guess
Kelly I don't know. Yeah, I think it's gonna be the middle one. That's my guess. Kelly. I don't know. Yeah, I think so.
Wow.
I'm just...
Sure, you've got a boyfriend.
Who?
Who?
I hope I'm right.
Kelly.
Oh!
Oh my gosh, you guys were down.
Oh my gosh, you actually went down.
That's really behind that. Let's rewind that.
Look, look, I'm gonna slow-mo this.
Oh, she does actually fall.
She falls.
Yeah, she falls.
And look, they go, the other two girls go, ah!
There she is, there she is, there she is, there she's gone.
One more time, just for since it gurgles.
Oh my God.
Ah!
Oh my God.
It scared me too, actually.
Yeah, the way that they did that, it scared me.
You'll immediately plummet to your dad.
Yeah, yes.
Whoa, there's a swimmo.
Oh!
Oh my God, that's crazy.
He's expecting.
Even the guy is surprised.
He's like, wait, I knew this was the name of the show,
but really?
And do they do any follow-up with these women or do they never talk about them again?
That's what I want to know. They were in it together.
Yeah, they were all in it together.
No, they weren't.
Until, uh, Suselle or whatever her name was felt, but Nelly fell through the door.
And Nelly, my opinion, was the best-looking one there.
And, uh, you know, you can't win them all. Nelly, my opinion, was the best-looking one there. And, you know, you can't win them all.
Nelly.
But hey, you had some great party songs back in the day.
Yeah, Nelly, for Tato.
No, Nelly.
Oh, Nelly.
Yeah, the Nelly.
Yeah.
Wasn't he like a thing back in like MTV Spring Break and shit like that?
Oh, of course.
Nelly hit like blonde hair, like, platinum blonde hair.
Didn't he?
At one point? Yeah. I think he would color his hair like Dennis Rodman and stuff. What was Nelly's song?
Oh, it's getting hot in here. So take off all your clothes
Well, you'd be good for Frankie D that's for sure. Yeah, all right tcb podcast.com
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