The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 166 - Chapel of My Eye

Episode Date: July 31, 2018

With the priestess and her retinue vanquished, the heroes go about searching the rest of the temple, seeking clues as to how Urgathoa worship has seeped into the frost giant training camp. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast, with their enemy vanquished. Don't you remember getting punched in the face with their cold, dead hands? I thought that was because they couldn't draw a weapon after failing so miserably to entangle us. How dare you? I almost killed you. How dare you? How dare you? The heroes gather the spoils of war. Ooh!

I don't think we have one of those to even dealt with. We have never encountered one. I don't think it was a campaign. They're the coolest. And decide who gets what. I think this might be a little more useful in my hands than yours. I'm sorry. I don't care. I'm dying. No, it's alright.

But they are far from safety. Baron, can you carry on for at least a little while? I can take us to a safe place very soon. And the dark temple. Very uneasy feeling in this room. Still holds many secrets. And this small room contains something utterly out of place in the giant village.

The adventure continues. Hell yeah, this is Pembroke's time to shine, baby. Right now. Oh, hello. I didn't see you there. It's your old buddy Troy LaValle coming at you once again with another exciting episode of the Glass Cannon Podcast. Been a fun couple of weeks. Some juicy combat in there. Those sons of bitches got the best of me once again, but I'm going to get them. I already took one of them down this book. I will take them all down, so help me.

Where are they going to go next? Well, you're about to find out in the next couple minutes, but first, some Glass Cannon Network announcements. First off, we hit our $25,000 goal on Patreon, you maniacs. You super kind, overly generous maniacs. We hit it. What does that mean? That means we're going to start live streaming games straight from Glass Cannon Studios, and we are kicking things off with the Pathfinder playtest adventure Doomsday Dawn. Let me

tell you what this is all about, just in case you don't know. For those of you going to GenCon, and once again, we are so sad that we can't be there this year, please have fun in our stead, because come hell or high water, we will be there next year. But if you're going, the Pathfinder playtest is releasing at

Gen Con. And part of that release is this adventure called Doomsday Dawn. Doomsday Dawn is going to be broken up into seven parts. And each part of the adventure is testing the new mechanics of the new system. So our plan is to Twitch all seven parts of that adventure. So sometime in late August, probably on a Friday night, that's our normal Twitch night, we will go live with

part one of Doomsday Dawn. And our plan is to play that entire part in one sitting. So we'll start at like 8pm and go two, three, hopefully not, but maybe four hours and hope to keep your attention. We said in the description of this goal that our plan was to make this an experimental testing ground. We want to take what we're doing to the next level. And what does that mean? That means we have to get involved with video, live video, especially if you want to compete with the big boys and girls, then we got to go there. And so what I want to do, and I said this on Cannon Fodder a couple weeks ago, is I don't want to let perfection be the enemy of good. I just want to get this content out there. So this is going to be raw, unedited,

probably not safe for work, but it's going to be a lot of fun. I think we're going to learn a lot in the process, and we're going to have seven different parts to go through. Hopefully, between the first one and the seventh one, we'll get better at it, and maybe by late in the seventh one, we'll have actually figured this out. But

that's where you guys come in, because not only are we going to be surveying this game and figuring out what we like and what we don't like about the Pathfinder playtest, but we want to hear from you guys what you like and don't like about our live show. There are going to be plenty of hiccups, but I think it's going to be something really special for us and for the community as we work to take this to the next level, because that's what video is. And if you want to see it, the only way you're going to be able to see it, hear it, or anything is to either watch it on Twitch or watch the videos uploaded on YouTube a week or so later. So that is the plan. The other

big announcement is we have opened up a $500 tier on our Patreon called the VIGCP Club. Now, we know this is not for everyone, but we want to get to a point where we can do this full-time. And in order to do that, we need to create more opportunities for growth. And that's what this reward tier can offer. If you are able to pledge at that level, you're going to get all the stuff from $100 on down. You're going to get to play with us on Roll20. You're going to get the Skype session, the bottle caps, the t-shirts, the whole shebang. And you're also going to get a couple new things. For one, if you're going to be in New York, you let us know. You can come hang out in the studio. We'll game with you. We'll drink with you. We'll hang out. It'll be a good time. We're also going to be having a couple parties here.

I know of at least two next year. And if you're in the New York area, you are invited to that party. And we will let you know well in advance so that if you want to fly out here and hang out, you're welcome to come do so. You're also going to get free VIP admission to all our live shows and events. Now, if that's a live show that's happening at a convention, we'll get you in early for some priority choice seating. Now, if you show up to one of our live shows,

like, I don't know, the one that's happening in Los Angeles, hopefully later this year, then you're going to get even better access. We're talking backstage passes, baby, where you can hang out with us before the show and watch how the sausage gets made. Actually, you probably don't want to see that. I mean, no one needs to see Grant's sausage. No one. Not even his wife. You're also going to get the Glass Cannon Mystery Box. Ooh, what could be in that box? Well, there's definitely going to be some legendary caps, which I don't even have,

along with some cool game- used materials, signed shit. It's going to be a really fun box. The kind of box where you would get and be like, oh, this is totally worth pledging $500 a month to those idiots. Once again, we know this isn't for everyone, but we want to thank you guys, whether you pledge a dollar or whether you pledge $500 for helping us get closer and closer to turning this into a real gig for us. Let me tell you right now, we're getting there. The fact that we're already past 25,000 means we're closer than we ever thought possible. So thank you for everything you do.

I've talked long enough. Let's just get to this episode because these guys got to do some cleanup and figure out what the hell is going on in this chapel. So please sit back and enjoy episode 166 of the Glass Cannon Podcast. I was never into music as a kid. No kidding. I remember going to my first dance in sixth grade, Skid, and all the kids knew all the

lyrics to the songs, and they were singing along and I felt very, very left out. I did not know Lady in Red? I didn't know. Never seen you looking lovely as you do tonight. They didn't know the lyrics to Lady in Red. I'm talking about like

Bell Biv DeVoe's Poison. Oh, come on. Come on, man. Every Little Step I Take by Bobby Brown. All those hits. No, Joe, I will not be quiet. I don't care if I'm popping on the mic. I am fired up. I am fired up.

I didn't know any of the songs. And I felt like, how do I not know this? I didn't have an older brother. I didn't have an older sister, I didn't have a radio I never dawned on me like I should listen to music. Your parents were 45 to 50 years older than you? They had

records, they had old LPs I remember they had Creedence Clearwater Revival which was cool because they had four faces, you could turn each face. Oh sure. They had Eddie Rabbit, remember Eddie Rabbit? Oh sure. I love the rainy nights, I love the rainy nights. Good stuff. A sure good stuff little johnny horton little battle new orleans trivia question who were eddie rabbit's kids uh bugs bunny and uh the one from tiny tunes no the band nelson you know nelson they were eddie rabbit's kids oh wow uh anyways i never got into music. And then when I got into high school, I had a friend that was really into Pink Floyd and the police.

So I started listening to the police, got hooked on the police, obsessed with the police, Sting. And that led to all the British Invasion, The Who, The Rolling Stones. Then I got really into classic rock. So by then, I was really into music. And I listened to everything except country. It was the only thing I could not stand. I could even listen to classical. And you love country now. And now it was the only thing i could not stand i could even listen to classical and you love country and now it is now the only thing i listen to people find it addicting yeah you know i've never gotten into it but the people that get into it are like

you can't go hate it my whole life and it happened to me i met my wife and and there were some girls that i was bartending with before i i uh i retired from bartending and they were really into country and i was like this is the worst i I was like, this is the worst. I cannot listen to this. This is the worst. Hey, can you play that one song again? And then it just turned. And I was talking to my father-in-law a few weeks ago, and he said it's because rock and

roll, traditional rock and roll doesn't exist anymore. There's no outlet to get into rock and roll. So a lot of rock musicians get in through country because country is like, come to us. We'll give you a spot. Just kind of country-fy your music a little bit. Keith Urban doesn't want to be a country. He wants to be a rock star. And so he goes into country.

Anyways, I'm just really into country. You know what's funny? Malcolm Gladwell. What did this have to do? Hold on. Hold on, Matthew. Skins into this, Matthew. I want to talk now.

Matthew, shut up. Malcolm, all Matthew does is talk, talk, talk. All he does is talk over me, and I'm sick of now. Matthew, shut up. All Matthew does is talk, talk, talk. All he does is talk over me and I'm sick of it. Mansplains. No, the... Malcolm Gladwell talks about why country music is so much more emotionally affecting

than rock and roll music. And it's because of the specificity of it. Because it's a very narrow focus on country. It's like everything is geared towards a very specific audience set of circumstances. Rock and roll by its nature has a much more broad appeal. Yeah. So you're not going to cry at a rock and roll song the way you're going to cry at a Hank Williams song. It's true.

Do you know the song Beer is Good, God is Great, and People are Crazy? Of course. That's a hell of a song. It sure is, Grant. I was driving in the backwoods like uh from an upstate new york wedding and the only kind of ice cold bud light in the console right after burying a body no no i just killed my best friend and his dog troy's exactly right i gotta correct you it wasn't a body it was body and that song came on and i was listening to

it and i got obsessed with it because the entire story behind the song is that he meets this old man at a bar this is the specificity you're talking about yeah is it god and it's an old man of the bar is it god no it's god Spoiler alert. It's not one of your fucking plays. And so he meets a man at a bar. God, it's very rare. I know. That's why it's on the country radio. Does he take him to his shack?

Make it reveal himself to be God? Matthew, one more word out of your mouth, and I swear to God... Gu matthew's next play takes place in a bar and a bartender is god so what it'll be eternal life would you like knowledge of evil um no so this guy sits down at a bar and he starts talking to this old man at the bar and it's one of the deepest voice country singers you know the name of the country singer? I don't want to. Yeah, Billy.

I think it's Billy Carrington. Yeah, so he's got a really deep voice, and he meets this old guy at a bar in Cozumel or someplace down south. So he starts talking about his whole life, what he's learned, what he hasn't learned, and his kids kind of suck. And he just has beers with this guy, and the only lesson he gives is that beer is good, God is great, and people are crazy. And by the end of the song, the man dies. He visits his grave, and it turns out that instead of giving the money that he had earned through his life, the man was a millionaire, to his children, he gave it to him. The man who had beers at the bar.

And they dance with senior readers. They dance with senior readers. Wow. They do? and people are crazy i just i love that song yeah dude i'm telling you you just give it a chance i know it sounds crazy but i saw a florida georgia line concert last year it was one of the best concerts i have ever been to better than counting crows i do love counting i see i'm not i'm not ready to trust troy and it's like yeah you'll trust samantha you'll trust my wife no no i do yeah luke bryan flora georgia line jason aldean blake shelton i mean come on blake shelton only puts out hits to be fair troy by saying we trust your wife she did marry you that's a terrible judgment me aside her judgment is automatically suspect give it a chance give it a chance can i ask a question drinking a beer and watching the sunset

i know your question what's my question joe what does this have to do with the situation i know exactly what matthew was thinking yeah that is a good question i'll answer your question joe with an answer bottle Bottle cap. Can I get a bottle cap? Bottle cap for Joe. Give me all your bottle caps. I need to clear the scene of bottle caps. Well, two reasons, Matthew. One, it was just what I was thinking about when we hit record,

and I wanted to share it with my good friends, who I only see when we record this podcast. That's true. That's true. And never outside of the show. Never outside anywhere. Except when we go to a convention and drink for 24 hours straight

just because we're so excited to be around each other outside of a game. And number two, I was just thinking, like, I'm so upset that that didn't go the way I wanted it to.

There must be a country song about it that would really get me through that bad combat. That would be a good country song. The GM Blues. The GM Blues. The GM Blues. The GM Blues.

I like that. I like that. Coming soon. You know what the... The Gunslinger Blues. The Gunslinger Blues. I've been thinking about it. Oh, boy.

And you took me down with that last Fortitude-Affecting ability. I gave you the plague. You gave me the plague. You gave him the plague. You got the plague, motherfucker! I completely forgot that you have the bubonic plague. Give me the plague. You got the plague, motherfucker! I completely forgot that you have the bubonic plague.

What the fuck? That is catchy. Oh my god. Yeah. That's a bad plague. Four bears walks away. Yeah. We must burn him. You have the black death. I can't wait until we camp and we do our traditional evening kiss before we go to bed.

And everyone just gets a little taste. Traditional evening coughing into each other's mouths. Open your mouth. Wait, Troy. I have something that might make me feel better. Gather around while my boobos separate. You got something that might make me feel better? What?

So I had Righteous Might on when the mummy hit me. Right. I turned it off when I opened up my hero lab today. You had down to five hit points in reality oh so one more good hit you take righteous might off come on yeah well who's gonna heal you if if if from permadeath only god no but i mean he was down like i'm down let me heal myself if if you had avoided the crit that i threw at you if i had not if the dice gods had not been as kind of me as they always are. On a daily basis.

I think it was my mother's spirit, even though she's alive, guiding me through that last episode and giving me this one. Well, she was with us in spirit. She was in spirit. And on the phone. And on the phone. But if she has spirit as her phone service. That's right, spirit.

She's with us in Verizon. The most... Only $39.99 a month. The most damage I could have done to you would have been, let's see, 17 plus 12. 29 points of damage if I hadn't crit. You would have had more rounds to do stuff. You could have killed us. It's about the die, buddy.

It's not about how overpowered any of our characters are. Bro, I rolled two crits last episode. It's not about your failures as a person. It's about Grant's die rolls. Don't get yourself up, Troy. It's about how beer is good, God is great, and people are crazy. So that's how it all came to be. There's the answer to your question, Matthew.

There it is. Waiting for Grant to do it for you. The God, in this sense, is Urgothelm. He ain't great. Oh, she ain't great. She ain't great. All right. Enough talk of country, Matthew.

Let's get down to business. Country matters? Country matters. What do you guys want to do? Okay. So I, for one, would like to search the bodies that's a fair uh a fair decision oh but first quarantine baron yeah quarantine back because i'm about pembroke is oh no he's gonna see his swelling bubos yeah and no it's just like this is not good at all. They put an ice cage around him? Yeah. Ferrazza?

Do you have that? Something that hurts him while it quarantines him. I don't feel so good. Hey, Pembroke, tell this forebear's fella. Well, Ferrazza, you understand me, but I'm under the weather. Yeah, Pembroke covers his mouth and says, he needs help badly. This is deadly. Deadly.

Four Bears definitely sees this. He immediately comes over to Baron and he does a heal check. 19. Contracts the plague. Yeah. And you and I are very sick. You should wear one of those masks with the long beak. The long beak.

Yeah. Those are terrifying. They are. Super scary. You ever read the- Like Spy vs. Spy? The Poe story? Mask of the Red Death? Oh, yeah. Those are terrifying. They are. Super scary. You ever read the... Like Spy vs. Spy? The Poe story? Mask of the Red Death?

Oh, yeah. All about the plague. Yep. I assume he's able to figure out that he has the bubonic plague. Yes. Okay, so

Forbearance is very concerned about this. He will say to Pembroke in so many words that he needs rest and Forbearance can help, but he needs time.

Yes. He needs at least a night's rest and he can help him tomorrow. Can you carry on for at least a little while? I can take us away to a safe place very soon. You would have to touch him. This is very deadly yeah Pembroke

tell four bears that his battle prowess inspired me I haven't seen a man fight like that with that passion since I last saw Galabras Finn and I'll carry on alright since I last saw Galabras Finn.

And I'll carry on. All right. I relay the message in Shawanti. And Forbearer just nods seriously and then he immediately turns to Feyraza. Shoot.

Dine kia'a. Asking her, are you okay? And he's more so asking, you know, Pembroke, you would hear it in the context of like barren, like wasting away, or are you just hurt now and kind of need healing? I kind of need healing. Yeah, so transmitting that, he is going to do an incantation. He just kind of looks up, is going to do an incantation. He just kind of

looks up. And he casts Cure Serious Wounds. And kind of lays his hands on Feraza. What are you getting there? 3d8 plus 3? 3d8 plus 11.

I'm sorry. 3d8 plus 5. No, that's Cure Light Wounds. Plus 15. Yeah. 3d8 plus 11. I'm sorry, 3d8 plus 5. Is there a max out on the cast? There's a max. Plus 15, yeah. 3d8 plus 11. Oh, wow. So there's no max? There is a max of 15.

Nice job. So 20 points of healing. That's a little better. Faraz will do some wanding of herself, but I can do that off air. Sure, sure. Consensual wanding warning you're the only one i want and baron you know that i want baron used all of his uh cure light wounds on himself in the proud tradition of self-buffing that the ashbeaks have self-care right it's so important in these troubled times you're also watching queer eye for the straight guy i am like episode two is all about that in the second season yeah yeah spoiler It's so important in these troubled times. You're also watching Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. I am.

I love that show. Episode two is all about that in the second season. Yeah. Spoiler alert. Okay. Talk about emotionally affecting. Let's talk about the plague. Forbear stands.

He talks to Pembroke again, speaking in Chianti, and he's saying he has seen great evil in his time, and he has seen rituals of undeath from the scone qua but nothing of this deprivation yeah before and is he a member of the scone qua he is not it is another tribe oh that's that's the like undead like uh exactly that's the one that we had on that uh lork and everybody went to that's the one that i was interacting with yeah they were you know had relations with the undead and he sort of had a connection to them in some way because of the you know his spirit walking speaking with ghosts and ancestors that kind of thing but this is

a depravity of which he he has not uh seen and he's seen some depraved stuff so he's not shaken or anything like that but he's just like this is really pure evil that we're seeing here in a different way than he's used to. And he's going to support Pembroke in his search of the body. So let's take their stuff. Once everybody's stabilized. Yeah. All right. So let's start with these temple servitors.

These mummified frost giants. They each are wearing hide armor. Nothing too exciting about that. But you notice they both have magical circlets on their head. Oh, my God. Headbands emanating magic. I can't use it. Oh, I have a props can.

Let's spellcraft that. Spellcraft that, John. Nine. I don't know what it is. 25. Ah, Ferrazza. Not one, but two. Headbands of alluring charisma plus four.

Oh my God. Oh man. Charisma. Charisma. On those things. Wow, man. Charisma. Charisma. On those things. Wow. That is so enormous. That's awesome.

What am I wearing? Oh, my God. Plus, fuck. I've got my headband of inspired wisdom. Four bears has no head slot. Take it. And he gets bonuses for charisma. Hell, yeah, dude.

Oh, my God. I can't believe they're giving away two headbands of alluring charisma plus four. Can I ask why these creatures would even have them? Yeah, that is weird. What do they benefit? What is the benefit? Weird, right? Were they going to come on to us if they survived another round?

Yep. Or to come and see me sometime. Were they like Urgotho a congressman? Were we going to work out a treaty? I was speaking to a young dwarf man in True Nile, Beltson. On the outskirts of True Nile. And he told me that he had to give up his one gun because my opponent's policies had forced him to sell all of his children. Perhaps it was a gift in return for eternal life.

Oh. Maybe it just made them bearable to be around. Yeah, sure. There you go. They are such boys. It's like, you guys suck. What can we do? Let's give them two headbands of Alluring Charisma.

Well, their boss seemed to be very preoccupied by how well people performed in sexual activities so perhaps the headband of alluring charisma made those well i didn't want to say it grant yeah no that's probably that could be true though i think that's it you don't think she was using them to satisfy her sexual urges i didn't say that troy no but that is also probably true of course you know when there are certain things you're like, oh, you take two charisma damage. And people are like, okay, who cares? Unless I'm a charisma-based character, who cares? But, like, think about that.

What is it? It's like you get a scar across your face or, like, boils on your arm. Nobody wants to touch you. If your charisma is boosted, all of a sudden you're a little more attractive. And also it sounds like a Henny Youngman joke or something. It's like, give my wife a headband of Allure Charisma Plus Four, please. We were just talking about how our references were probably a little too old for our audience. Dude, I think Gen X will totally get Henny Youngman.

They love Henny Youngman. You know what's scary? I thought the Hank Williams reference was too old. If my mom... We went about some Red Fox. Hold on. I know. My friend Del, he's...

He gets it. He gets it. He's the one guy. It's for you, Del. This show's for you, Del. If my mom can ever figure out how to download the podcast, she'll love that. She'll never get it through Sprint. Let's talk about her.

That's unbelievable. Each one of those headbands is worth 16,000 gold pieces. Yeah. Might be worth selling one. It's like a super rich dude paying for expensive plastic surgery for his wife or something. No, I mean, but it fits like, I'm telling you, it fits Four Bears crazily to the point where, like, you know, it is nowhere near worth selling it for him. Oh, yeah. Dude, a plus four item?

That's no joke. And, like, a shaman relies on charisma to a certain extent that I went, like, low on just because I was like, I'm going to focus on other things. This is incredible to find this right here. Yeah, that's awesome. That's great. For Raza, too. It helps me a little. I mean, it's a plus four headband,

so it definitely helps. I'm actually looking at Joe's character sheet right now, and he is the most overpowered character we have. He has a 16, a 14, an 18, a 10, a 15, and a 16 as his character. Oh, look at her. Is that her as a headband? Yeah, yeah. Look at her. Here's her. I don't

think I showed it to you guys in color. Oh, no, you did. Did I show you in color? No, it was the printout you had. Look at her. Is that the headband? Yeah, yeah. Look at her. Here's her. I don't think I showed it to you guys in color. Oh, no, you did. Oh, not in color. No, it was the printout you had. Look at her. What beautiful art, huh? Yeah, that's gorgeous. That arm.

I was saying I just saw Thor Ragnarok. Oh, yeah. And it reminds me of Cate Blanchett in the movie has that horned, like tight helm but with the horns coming off of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's exactly what that is. It's the goddess of death, and it's badass. I thought about casting her as Cate Blanchett,

but I didn't end up casting her. But that's what I thought of immediately, was the horns. And I haven't even seen that. I just saw the previews. Anyways. What has she got? Let's talk about her. Do they have weapons? Oh, she's got... I meant the mummies. No. They just had those. They just had rapids. Don't you remember getting punched in the face with their cold, dead hands?

I thought that was because they couldn't draw a weapon after failing so miserably to entangle us. How dare you? I almost killed you. How dare you? How dare you? She has, first of all, spoiler from last week, a scroll of flesh worm infestation. Oh. I'm sure none of us can cast that.

I think it might be a divine scroll. I'm not 100% sure. Oracle spell list? Or inquisitor? Cleric, inquisitor, sorcerer, wizard. Level 4. Add that to your spell book. I'll take it.

And witch. That would be a great gorm spell. She has a large, magical scepter. It is a large weapon, but it is magical. She also has a pink and green spear ion stone. Ooh. I don't think we have. Do we have one of those?

Nope. Have you ever even dealt with? We have never encountered one, I don't think, in this campaign. They're the coolest. They're really cool. We've definitely encountered them in other campaigns. Oh, yeah. In Jade Region?

Never in Giant Slayer? I think this is the first time in Giant Slayer. Oh, these things are the best. Somebody give me a spellcraft on that before I keep going. I need DC 22. Okay. 35. Pembroke knows.

Both of you know. Pembroke knows. Both of you know. Pembroke's like, oh, I've seen this before. Baron doesn't know. Let me see what conditions in it. That's the thing about Ion Stones. They're all in different conditions. Cracked? Yeah, is it cracked?

Is it broken? I think it's just good to go. You're going to like this show. GTG? We're talking GTG. Plus two enhancement bonus to charisma. Oh, my. Wait, well, I mean,G. Plus two enhancement bonus to Charisma. Oh. Oh my. Wait, well, I mean, then it doesn't matter.

Does it stack? No. No, those are both enhancement bonuses. Because Alluring Charisma is an enhancement bonus. Yeah. Yeah. So this Island Stone just floats around your head. Just...

It like orbits your head. It would help both Baron and Pembroke. I could take it because I'm a... Caster level 12. Currently a Charisma 7. So I'll take it because I'm a... Caster level 12. Currently a charisma 7. So I'll take that plus two bonus. Get out of here. Pembroke, can you take it?

Do you have some level of diplomacy? Yes. I want it. No, I can't take it. Is it take up a head slot or is it just the... No, it floats around you. I don't think it does. No, it does not.

There is no slot. It has no slot. It just floats. Might as well take it. How about a little roll-off, gentlemen? Let's do a roll-off. Let's do a roll-off. It's something Baron can mildly use. 18. That's going to be tough. Natural 1.

Yeah! You owe him an Ion Stone. Listen, Baron, I think this might be a little more useful in my hands than yours. I'm sorry. I don't care. I'm dying. No, it's all right.

It's all right. Peter, the sliver of bread. That's why he won the argument. When he starts losing facial features to the plague, he might need it at that point. Plus, you're already so handsome. You don't need it. I only believe him because of the ions. Yeah, exactly. He's already using it, you're already so handsome. You don't need it. I only believe him because of the ions. Exactly. He's already using it.

He's already so charismatic. He's so beautiful. I can't look away. Well, I'll let you roll Spellcraft on this scepter in a moment, but in the meantime she's also wearing a magical ring. I think it's a ring you guys will recognize

because probably one if not all of you it's a ring you guys will recognize because probably one if not all of you are wearing a ring of protection. Yeah. Are you wearing a ring of protection plus three? Holy shit. Holy shit. I will not take that. That can go to someone else. I would like it. I'd like it.

Yeah, I mean, I'm definitely going to roll. Who's got a plus two or a plus one on their person? I've got a plus one on me. Oh, what a boost. What a boost. Yeah, Four Bears has a plus one on them. Three-way roll-off. But there's enough.

You know what? Even if you lose, there's enough money from, like, the other show we found, like the Headband of Charisma, you don't necessarily need to maybe buy a Ring of Protection plus two. Just go to the ScareGuard general store. Yeah. All right. They're selling them half off. All right, roll.

You can throw in a bottle cap if you want. All right, no, I'm good. Good selling them half off. All right, roll. You can throw in a bottle cap if you want. All right, now I'm good. Good try. That's a great item, though. Holy shit. We're gonna protect it plus three. Matthew just shaking his head. Joe's shaking his head.

Grant. Grant doesn't look too confident. 12, 8, 7. Oh! What is it with him? And Baron becomes even more unkillable. Great. Why do you let him do that?

You know what? Actually, it's interesting, because if I'm not mistaken, the casting of Protection from Evil adds a deflection bonus to your AC, if I'm not mistaken. I think so, too, yeah. And so Baron is the prime caster of Protection from Evil in this party. So he has the ring. He doesn't need to cast it on himself.

He casts it on us. It makes sense. You're a great axe crit away from rolling up a new character. Somebody roll spellcraft on this mace. Mace Windu. Mace Windu. Mace Windu. 35 again.

24. Don't worry about it. Pembroke's like, I detect a certain magic from this. It's a plus one heavy mace. 35 again. 24. Don't worry about it. Pembroke's like, I detect a certain magic from this. It is a plus one heavy mace. Oh, nice. What? But there is much more to this scepter of divine providence. Did you plan out four bears knowing this would be the loot drop?

I just want to know, Joe. It's ludicrous. It seems a little too perfect. It's almost impossible for this heavy mace to be better than the heavy mace of his tribe. Oh. Caster level 17th. Oh, my God. Wow.

Clerics and other divine spell casters make good use of Scepters of Divine Providence, which not only function as weapons and holy symbols, but also heighten the power of the caster's channeled energy. holy symbols, but also heighten the power of the caster's channeled energy. This iron rod is crowned with a metallic sphere and functions as a plus one heavy mace. In the hands of the divine spellcaster,

the rod also counts as a holy or unholy symbol and divine focus. If the wielder of a scepter of divine providence has the channel energy class feature, she can increase the radius of her channeled energy burst by 10 feet at the cost of

one additional use of her channel energy ability. The wielder can expend additional uses to further expand the burst radius up to a maximum of 30 additional feet, which is why she could hit you on that first round because I just expended more uses of my channel to burst up to 30 feet!

I mean, excuse me, you can add up to 30. Yeah, you bursted 60 feet in that round. Right. That was awesome. Cost her three channels. Now, I don't think anyone here is a channel class feature yet. Nope. No.

Not yet. Certainly, a large weapon needs to be resized. But if you ever take a level in Cleric it's certainly a cool weapon but it's very cool it is right now tied to Urgothola at least flavor wise as is this entire room

the huge bug on the floor this fly with a skull on its back the altar and the image of this half naked woman skeleton from the waist down skull on its back. The altar and the image of this half-naked woman's skeleton from the waist down with a scepter in her hand behind this flame wall

as it slowly extinguishes. You see this woman looking down on all of you. There are doors leading out the way you came. Two doors leading out of the temple itself. Two doors on either side of the temple itself, two doors on either side of the altar to the north leading into two other rooms,

and then a set of double doors to the east, opposite the double doors you walked into. Yeah, this one looks like one really big room, or multiple rooms that we haven't seen yet. I'm worried, but I want to check it out yeah i like i really pembroke really wants to take care of baron but he also

doesn't want to have to come back here so it's it has a lot of bad associations yeah this is this has got to be as all the like crazy stuff that we've seen even this has to be a particularly unsettling environment. And I think, to a large extent, Four Bears is following Pembroke's lead. You know what I mean? He's the one that can kind of translate, that can speak to him,

that can kind of decide what we do. And there isn't a level of, I don't know, sanctification that Four Bears needs to do here. He's been in these evil places. He doesn't think of them as like, oh, they need to be cleansed or anything to that degree. Well, that's the thing too. Four Bears, he's coming in at level

10. That is exceptional. He's seen some stuff. Right. Just think about all the stuff we've seen to get to where we are. Which is one of the difficult parts about bringing in an 11th level character. You have to have somebody who has a lot of experience, who has seen a lot of stuff. That's a lot of backstory to fill in, at least mentally. And he has seen a lot of really awful stuff in war and all that kind of shit.

But nothing quite like this. But he's fine to kind of follow your lead on this, and he knows from his kind of skills as a medicine man that Baron is going to be okay as long as he survives the night. You know what I mean? What kind of spell would restore the constitution point damage that Baron has taken? Lesser restoration. Lesser restoration?

And then you just need to remove disease. Well, let me be the first to remember an item we neglect far too often. The sapling rod. And plant that stuff right now. In the

chapel? Yeah. Do you not need dirt? Let me just double check. Feel like you need dirt. Natural ground or earth, you're absolutely right. So we'll wait on it. We'll do it when we get home. We'll wait on it. You're a real sapling, Rod Grant.

Alright, so in this place, bereft of the blessings of any good or neutral even God, this place subsumed and filled with the essence of Urgothoa. Baron grabs the sapling rod, thinking only of himself. Sure. As he always does. And then unleashes it, lets go of it, back into the bag of holding because he realizes he's going to be unable to plant it.

Right. Just feeling sick. Emanating. As you're near Baron, as you wait around him, searching throughout the room, searching these bodies, there's like a stink emanating from him. More so than usual.

That's a lot. It's really bad. Alright, let's check out this room. Forebearers is actually going to remove his cloak. Pants. And he will remove his cloak and he'll toss it over Baron. Oh. Kind of wordlessly just walk over to him and toss this magical cloak over him.

And you can see the pallid flesh of Baron just overcome by the sickness and kind of these gaunt cheeks that have been overtaken by this disease. And he wordlessly looks up at four bears and kind of uncertainly at first makes eye contact with him. And then he nods and covers himself with it and kind of shivers a bit and walks forward behind him. And four bears just says to Baron, and basically just saying, don't remove this until you are feeling stronger.

It says this will help you. It's a cloak of resistance plus four. Wow. That'll help. And Baron immediately feels better. So it'll take 24 hours and all that shit, but you get the idea. Great. Very cool. Remove it from your character. So kind. And he will take his shield and battle axe and move to the double door that goes deeper into the side of the cathedral that we haven't examined yet.

Are we listening at the door? Feyros steps up to four bears, puts her hand on his chest. Slow down fella We're gonna listen at the door Easy big fella Roll perception check 31 No 24

29 29 for Pembroke You listen in Pembroke is the one who really feels like he's got a good handle on the room. You hear what sounds like a large room. There's no sound coming in from there, but you can tell from listening long enough. That's one large room. It's just like echoey.

There seems, there is silence, but I think this is one chamber. And what did Pembroke roll? Uh, 29. 31 from Baron. Does that add anything? No, it takes away. What a, what a terrible question. It seems like several small chambers.

That's what I see. I will foil you at every turn, Grant. Kick in the door. Well, four bears at the door is going to wash across with detect magic. See if there's any magic in the other room. You do detect magic, yep. What does he detect? He detects...

Multiple auras? Four auras of magic. Spread throughout the room, large size. I have an aim from the corners of the room. Each corner? Each corner directly in the corner. Kick in the door. Baron weakly upon hearing.

Hold on. He's going to hold the detect magic until he can determine possibly a school of magic. Sure. 23 on spellcraft to determine the school of magic. Yeah, it is evocation. Evocation. Evocation magic. That's fine.

I'll roll it over. It's evocation. I love its knowledge arcana. Evocation magic. Oh, okay. I'll roll it over. It's evocation. Kick in the door. Yeah, well, I mean, he's going to say to Pembroke that it's possible that there are magical traps in the corners of the run that may fire off. Yeah, Pembroke probably senses the same thing. So just, yeah, move with care. Yes, we should be careful. But open the door. yeah, open the door.

And you open the door. Alright, place yourselves on the map. Baron and forebears up front, Feyraza and Pembroke in the back. You open the door into this large room as Pembroke

detected. You see giant-sized pews lined up facing a large stone altar in the north side of the room. Above the altar you can see right from the door, maybe the guys in the back can't see, a

tapestry depicting a great citadel in the midst of a city surrounded by a vast wasteland. Oh, man. There are implements on the altar. The rest of the room looks empty except for four torches in the four corners of the room. Yeah.

Before we go in, I want to do a knowledge history on the mural. You can do planes or religion. Okay. Planes is actually a particular strong suit for Pembroke. And I rolled a natty 17. There you go, dude. So that's 36. So that you open the door and Pembroke gets a view to the back and puts like a hand maybe

on Baron or forbear's shoulder and you see this. You read about this. This is not that uncommon knowledge. I know this place. What do you see? It is

on this tapestry, Ergotho's realm on Abaddon. Ah.otho's realm on Abaddon. Ah. Wow. This is Matthew Abaddon, Lance Reddick's character from Lost. It's the city that he founded. No, this is...

This is the city of Ergotho. Abaddon. A place of immense evil. The poisoned river Styx Has its source In Abaddon Before it meanders like a twisted serpent Onto other planes Abaddon may be the most

Hostile of the outer planes It is the home of daemons Fiends of pure evil Untouched by the struggle between law and chaos who personify oblivion and destruction. It is

pure evil. Oh my god. So did they detect the tapestry was magic? They did not. It's just the torches, right? Yeah. You look at the torches and you think, oh. Abaddon was also one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.

Ah. And the star of that, what was that game where you played one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse? Darksiders. Darksiders was the star of that game. It was a really great game. Right. Yeah, that was a good game. Can I do a spellcraft check on I'm going to step up just to the threshold and try to look at the torches.

Sure. Do a spellcraft check on them. For us, we'll do the same. 25? 24. Yeah, you both know, not unlike the room you just came from, the torches are lit by continual flame. Ah.

And invocations, though. Yeah, they're not traps. No. All right. Pembroke releases a sigh of relief. are lit by a continual flame in the evocations bell. Yeah, they're not traps. Pembroke releases a sigh of relief. Farazza would like to burn the tapestry, and she proposes this. She wants to desecrate the entire chapel as part of our continuing our sabotage mission. That would provide some small comfort

to ruin what they've built here. Four Bears asks you, what is she saying? She proposes burning down the blanket. And Four Bears... Blanket with picture.

Tapestry. And Four Bears just like enthusiastically agrees. Almost a smile. It's just like, yes, burn it to the ground. Yeah. Burn it all. Are the torches easily detachable?

Sure. From the braziers? Or are they braziers? I don't know how that works. Scotses. Yeah. So Farazza, can she just do a quick perception check to make sure they're not trapped? Yeah, sure.

30. They appear to be fine. All right, so she's going to detach one, walk over to the wall, and hold it up to the tapestry and light it on fire. Nice. It lights on fire, and slowly it catches up the wall, just obscuring this whole thing. And not unlike people who aren't even pyromaniacs, you get lost in these flames, and you just stare into it.

And as you stare into it longer, you start to see a scene unfold. longer, you start to see a scene unfold. You see a river that sort of ends at some sort of fortification. You can't see beyond the fortification. You can really just see this makeshift dam stopping this river that leads to a moat around the fortification. And it's all very still and quiet. Until the image of a young man comes flying up

out of the water, appearing covered in blood, and then is immediately struck down and knocked to the ground. And then you see footsteps walking towards the body. And the tapestry burns out.

Wow. Does everyone see this or is this... Only Feyrozza. Oh, goddammit. Son of a bitch with Feyrozza knowing everything about the world from beginning to end. She's got... Goddammit! She's got the sixth sense.

She's got the judge! And the seventh and the eighth sense. Bruce Willis was dead from the beginning! That's the whole twist! She knew it! She knew that next Christmas he'd be fighting another terrorist attack.

Is that the twist? How could the same thing happen to the same guy twice? We're having fun. Farazza keeps it to herself for now. God damn it. Can we search the room sure go ahead and roll some perception perception any particular place you guys are looking 27 27 you're just looking about the room i'm checking out particularly the altar okay uh 30 baron is also looking at the altar. 25. Faraz is going to check the pews. Pews.

Four bears? Four bears will... Yeah, he will also check the pews. Natural one. Yeah, so four bears. You don't find anything. You trip and fall over the pews. Faraz, you're looking through the pews

and I think you see that there's really nothing of interest. There might be a couple of remnants of old books that aren't even, they're like ripped in half. They don't really have everything. You're still preoccupied by what you saw. Whereas Baron and Pembroke find on the altar a masterwork silver dagger and a silver goblet worth 50 gold pieces.

Nice dagger. Treasures beyond reckoning. And a goblet. The question is, do you draw the blood and then drink the blood? It looks as if it was used for some sort of ceremony that dealt with drawing blood and then drinking it. Can I do a religion check on this? Yeah.

16. I will roll my own religion check as well. He beats me a little bit. Yeah, I mean, knowing what you know since you walked into this place, you don't know if they were doing this to their victims and then drinking their blood.

Was she doing this to her servitors and drinking their blood as some sort of ritual, making them drink her blood? There's some dark shit going on in here. So there's like dried blood in the chalice. Oh, absolutely, yeah. And the knife itself is covered in blood. Right.

So some kind of bloodletting, drinking ritual. Yeah. So evil. It's so evil. So dark. Or just Catholic. Wow. Either way. Well, yeah. So evil. It's so evil. So dark. Or just Catholic. Wow. Well, one or the other.

Cut the mic, cut the mic. I'm just saying, this is a very common... Matthew's very upset. I'm not. I hope you guys are ready for the flame wars. It's a thing that seems like, wow, that's so evil, but it's just like, actually, that's very similar to what the Catholic Church does. So now that we've thoroughly...

Discredited your chosen religion. All right. All right. Sorry. Calm down. Let's call your mom and ask her. I'm sorry. Your mom would care.

Let me tell you one thing. She has a few thoughts. My mom is 100%... I want to talk to you. My mother is A, 100% behind transubstantiation. Get this consubstantiation stuff out of here. Good word. Good word.

I'm on the same page there. Secondly, my mother... Is a saint! She is a saint. But when my dad divorced her, she got upset, and she, like, went to the Monsignor and was like, don't excommunicate me, please. Please! Please!

And she was like... Wow, that's serious. She wanted to keep the marriage together that hard. Wow. Take my son! But not me! He's just a foolish, slow child. Drink his blood if you must.

Here, I brought the knife. I brought the dagger. Eat of his flesh. Here's the goblet. Here's the goblet. Do what must be done. Do not kid me from the church. I want to apologize to everyone who worships anything.

Slow-w, child. I'm also really glad now that your mom doesn't listen to the show. That apology feels as hollow as your leg. I know you keep your rubies that you're going to take to the future. Don't give away where I keep my rubies. It's in the hollow leg.

The idea of your mother going to the priest to beg not to be excommunicated by sacrificing you in a ergo-tho-a-like ritual will never not be fun. That's hilarious. No, it's really funny. I mean, it's just so prescient. It is.

It really is. Yeah, yeah. It's America. Bless her heart. It's America. So Baron is going to take a quick walk around the room now that we've done all our perception checks. Yeah, yeah.

And he's just going to see, since we've searched so thoroughly, if he receives any checks to notice any such features that might be secret doors from his stone cunning. Because he should receive one automatically if he walks within ten feet of one. You know, I've never heard you mention this before roll a stone jack fuck i don't really worry about it so much because i know troy 100 of the time will remember that he's just such a great he is a real stickler for our abilities when it comes to the small stuff yeah i'm your guy that's a total of a 24 when it comes to the small details, that's where Troy shines. I got you, buddy. You find no less

than 24 secret doors. Oh, wow. That's like stupid skill. It's 12 more than I thought. No, you don't find anything. Okay. The consecrate spell that I cast earlier only lasts for two hours against something

that's already dedicated to another god it's been an hour and 50 minutes right but it's not about that little area where we can fight other people and i want to know if there's anything we can do on top of burning down this tapestry on top of whatever else we've done to this place to not only consecrate this place but to kind of take down the morale of this camp, which is really our overarching goal to scatter the people that have gathered at Skirgard. Roll a wisdom check. Can I do that as well? Sure.

I also have wisdom. It's a 25. Wow. 15. What? I'm sorry, 24. 24. So, Baron, you're thinking about this. What else can we do? You just saw Feyraza light up that tapestry. Obviously, the tapestry of Urgothoa herself, this portrait, which was providing them with some sort of unholy boost. You can destroy that as well.

But if you're thinking, like, how can we break the morale of the camp by doing something here? You feel as if you've already succeeded. Oh, just killing her. By eliminating her. Yeah. Okay. She was the source of, like, this evil. And Forbearance is kind of going to push it here with Pembroke again, speaking quickly in Shawanti, that he needs to get out of, that Baron needs to get out of here.

Yes, yes, yes. Needs rest, and tomorrow Forbearance can help him. But here there is nothing more we can do. We will, my friend. I just simply want to make you leave no stone unturned. I do not want to come back here. The other rooms, you mean? Check out the other two doors.

Other rooms. To the east and west of the altar. Staircases leading up to the altar. Are these sacristies? Is that the name? The sacristy in the front of the church? That sounds super right, but I have no idea. You were the altar boy, Joe. I can't remember if they were the side rooms

behind the altar or the front of the church. I feel like the sacristy is where the communion was kept. Speaking of... Did you say the napkins? To the side of the altar. Those are the sacristies, I'm pretty back. That's like the side. Did you say the napkins? No, the vestments. No, he's... To the side of the altar. Those are the sacristies, I'm pretty sure. Yeah.

It's like dressing rooms. In most older churches, the sacristy is near a side altar or more usually behind or on the side of the main altar. It's like a... Boom! It's like a green room for priests. Nailed it. So you would think maybe one of these could be a sacristy.

That's where the champagne and M&Ms are. That's oftentimes... That's actually... Only brown M&M's! No one will worship God unless there's only brown M&M's. That's where the priests are who like to hug a little too long. The sacrosanct... Oh, no! Troy, don't take down those

naughty priests! They've got it too hard! Don't give them trouble, the valley! They deserve all the fair play in the world. So the sacrosy is also oftentimes a place where the relic of the church is held, which is often like a piece of

a dead saint or a holy person. Well, it's usually on the altar. The reliquary is a tabernacle of some kind. I had a priest finger bone me once. Oh, come on!

See, now we've got to cut out this entire section. Cut the mic! I was thinking about this, though, when you were using the mace, and we got that other magical mace. Are you familiar with the Aspergillum? Yeah. So that's what they throw the holy water in. The censer, right?

Or no, no, yeah. In Diablo 2, the paladin had a special mace weapon that was an aspergillum that they could hit people with, but it also threw holy water out to do additional damage against undead. I need that weapon in this game. That would be awesome. You're welcome, Tom. By the way. Tom Lovering.

Shout out to our good buddy. Our buddy. All right, Diablo. Diablo man Tom. There's an aspergillum in Jade Region. Is there really? There is. Yeah. There's an Aspergillum in Jade Region. Is there really? There is. Yeah, there was somebody like when you, well, I don't want to spoil it, but when you climb that tower.

Oh. Throwing the holy water. Like Socky. Yeah. Oh, that's right. Let's check them out. So can we bust in and explore these back rooms where I assume there are unconsecrated hosts and priest clothes? Would you like to go to the west one or the east one?

They look to be of a similar size, 20 by 20 feet wide. Let's do west. Go west, Aaron. Let's go west. West. Four bears will kick open the door. Horace Greeley. Let's follow Horace Greeley's advice and go west, young man.

Four bears kicks open the door. And to be fair, the urgency of his mission is that he understands where Pembroke's coming from. He wants to clear this out. But he wants to get Baron out of here and resting as soon as possible. So he's just like, no perception checks. Boom. Bust a door. I went to Catholic school

for 16 years. And I'm not Catholic. Eight years of grade school. Four years of Savarian Brother High School, and four years of Jesuit college. It's called college. Thank you. Is Columbia not Catholic? Even I...

No. No. No, dude. Even I forgot that the sacristy is back there. Bottle cap up. Yay! You just walked into communion storage. Wow.

Wow. That is the first benefit anyone has ever gotten from being an altar boy. That's true. On this show at least. Depends on what you consider better. Come on! Troy! This is again, send all hate mail to Troy.

This is why you listen. You're not going to get this on the other shows. That's right. You see several crates and barrels. You'll never get listen. Inside hate mail. You're not going to get this on the other shows. That's right. You see several crates and barrels. You'll never get easy jokes and traumatic words on the other shows. By the way, it's a lork bottle. It's a lork bottle. I just said that on purpose.

You'll never get trigger warnings on any of the other shows. Nope. Several crates and barrels are stored in this room. Most of the barrels look like the beer barrels you saw in the brewery. Oh. A couple of them are a little different. So you think maybe they just have another type of alcohol in them. And then they're just boxes of shit.

It appears as if most, if not all of the food stuffs in here are reserved for ritual use. Very uneasy feeling in this room. I mean, you see liquor and... Liquor or wine?

Well, you see beer. You see casks that are probably some other sort of alcohol. Boxes containing culinary spices, candies, delicacies you would think they probably confiscated from ambushed merchant caravans. caravans. But there's just a very dark feeling in here that like among the basic necessities

are all this stuff that is being used in these sexual death rituals. This place is messed up, man. It is. Can four bears do a quick sweep for detect magic? Sure. You don't detect magic? Sure.

You don't detect any. Okay. Baron, you can roll an alchemy check on the other barrels. Would absolutely love to, Troy. Thank you so much. You know what? I know you have it. You've been so respectful towards my church this whole episode. I'd love to just really...

Let's say that's 18. Let's say it's 18. Let's say it's 18. Yeah, so like I said, most of the barrels of beer. I can also do alchemy. Oh, okay. You have alchemy? I do. And actually 32.

Oh, wow. So Pembroke really knows what's going on. You both hit the check, but Pembroke is like, like when Baron says something, Pembroke like adds a couple more rejoin. Well, actually, it's this, not this. It's not that year. It's this year.

One contains giant moonshine and another is a cask of fine Parisian wine. Ah. So you might say, oh, it's giant moonshine. And then Pembroke will be like, well, actually, it's this vintage this year. Actually, this is a 4712. Oh, that's actually from Sandpoint. 4712. I have that's actually from Sandpoint. 4712. I have one question.

Yes. Is it flammable? Well, the moonshine certainly is. Yes, the moonshine certainly is. I have another question. Yes. Considering we've already poisoned some other alcoholic beverages we've come across in this, is there a way to check this for any type of poison?

Or would you roll over that craft alchemy maybe to be able to tell? Yeah, I mean, with Pembroke's craft alchemy, you can know that none of the poison barrels made it here. Got it. Okay. Okay. So this is, we think, we would assume that this is for ritualistic purposes. Can I do, detect alignment typically works on living creatures,

but I want to try to locate the source of the unease in this room outside of just general psychic energy. The source of the unease is coming from you putting two and two together, how they were using these things. You know, orgies and stuff. Death orgies.

Can we appraise either of these barrels? Yeah, they're worthless. They'd be worthless, too. There's no way you could cart them around. Maybe you could throw it in the bag of holding, but... Let's use them to burn things. But let's check out the other room first. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah, you're not really going to get anything for it. Yeah. Got it. Unless you, like, join a merchant caravan. Or you can get drunk. You can get drunk. Check out the other side of the altar.

Who's going where? Right now you're still... Faraz will go the other side of the altar. Who's going where? Right now you're still... Farazza will go first and listen at the door. Okay. Roll protection. 24. You listen in. Don't hear anything.

Very small room for sure. Four bears comes up behind her. Farazza gestures to four bears. Farazza does. Would you like to go in? She nods. So he waits for her to go in? No, she gestures to do Bears. Farazza does. Would you like to go in? She nods. So he waits for her to go in. No, she gestures to do the kicking in the door thing.

Would you like to go in first? It was so dramatic last time. Perhaps I could step in. And use words. Fake gesturing. Yeah, so they have this little miscommunication. And then Four Bears is not trusting anything pulls out his

mace opens the door pushes his way into the other side of this altar you open the door mace in hand and this simple you open the door, mace in hand,

and this simple, small room contains something utterly out of place in the giant village. Now, to you, maybe it doesn't seem as strange since this is your first foray into Scarecrow, but the people looking over your shoulder, well, I've never quite seen this in all the places we've ransacked since we've come here. A large bed with a soft mattress, fluffy pillows,

and silk sheets. It's a La Quinta. It's definitely not a La Quinta they accept pets with a deposit this is very definitely not a La Quinta it's a Motel 6 no it isn't a small nightstand

sits against the opposite wall great depth of field I mean you're welcome seriously the three dimensionality Of Troy's maps are Just And that was the rest

Just seconds I don't do a lot well Amazing But I draw a quick bed Why are we commissioning Arts when we have One of the world's Great artists

Like sitting right here In our own company Please I was They called me The Picasso of maps Because you're An insane Spaniard

Who caught syphilis several times. A small price to pay for greatness. Perception check on the room? Yeah, me too. Yeah. 19. 39. Oh, son of a bitch.

Standing outside of the room, I'm assuming. You're just kind of looking in. Looking it over. Seeing what's going on. Four bears pushed in there, but he just got a 19. You don't sense any movement or anything. You see some stuff on top of the night sand. What stuff?

He's looking right at it. 39. 10 feet away. Sure, sure. No, you're 20 feet away. 20 feet away. What does he see? Looks like some sort of...

Journal of some kind? Sheets of paper. A journal. No, no, sheets of paper, like laying out... Loose, loose parchment. An ink pot, a pen, and some sort of... Oh, ha ha! Writings.

And some sort of, like, symbol. Like a platinum symbol. For us, it will gesture to Pembroke. Yeah, Pembroke is going to cautiously enter the room and go over towards... And Four Bears is going to cover Pembroke because he's like, I probably can't read this. So he's just going to... Pembroke, roll a Fortitude save.

Oh, no. Come on. That is a 14. Oh, fuck, Pems. Oh, no. Come on. That is a 14. Oh, fuck, Pems. Oh, no, Pems. I just wanted you to roll a Fortitude. Oh, you are the worst person alive. That's the best thing to do as a GM.

We're having fun. You're terrible. You see a platinum unholy symbol of Urgothoa laying on the table next to a pouch of black onyxes. They're like spilled out. You would assume the rest of the pouch just contains more of these black onyxes. Several sheets of paper, like I said, an ink pen, a pot of black ink. Nothing else of interest in the room. This beautifully ornate bed

doesn't appear to have anything laying on it. Can I do... But it does appear to have been very well used. I cast the first level spell Blacklight and cast it over the bed. No, no. I'm going to... Can I do a religion check on the Onyxes and like...

Sure, sure. Maybe out of praise. Oh, sure. Maybe you ought to praise. Praise, okay. 20. Yeah, they're worth a total, if you look through them, a total of 750 gold pieces. That's nice. Now, if I let you think about it in terms of religion, did this have any religious significance? You don't quite know.

And obviously, this is platinum, similar to Percatoa. That's probably worth 50 gold pieces. But it's more just awful. But you think like maybe before she came into this, having this scepter, she used this was her holy symbol. And then she transferred it

to the scepter. So this is her private chamber. The high priestess's quarters. Okay. And the papers, like is there anything? So you pick up the papers and start reading them. Get the papers. Get the papers. They appear to be Jimmy two times. Jimmy two times.

Nailed it. The papers appear to be personal correspondence between someone named DeBellos and someone named Dulcelene, who appears to be DeBellos' sister. Could that be her? Could that be the woman? You would think one of them is DeBellos and one of them is Dulcelene. If you're looking at it longer, most likely the woman whose room this was, who you just killed, was DeBellos.

And the other woman is Delceline. You would think so with those names. As you read it, you feel as if it's strangely mundane. And it's addressed to a location called Drouanwiet Manor. Ooh. That sounds lovely. Sounds like a La Quinta. A Tessellic. La Quinta Manor.

In the letter, she asks about the weather, the health of the other's children, and how she misses the autumn in Varno. Varno. What is Varno? Can I do a geography?

Sure. Oh, yeah, I got geography. Never forget to use a 20. 20? Yeah. Yeah, you both know it's a principality in Ustalav. Son of a bitch. Yeah, Varno, yes. Principality in Ustalav.

Ustalav. Do you know it? Yes. Yes. Addressed to a location called Druanwiet Manor. Asked about the weather, the health of the other's children, and how she misses the autumn in Varno. There's something about the letter that is just so disconnected from the woman you just fought. Is this like in code or something? Yeah. I'm wondering.

Can we do a perception check for code? You can do a linguistics check. Hell yeah. This is Pembroke's time to shine, baby. That is a 28. Time to shine. If I'm not mistaken, 28 linguistics wins every linguistics check in the history of Pathfinder. There's no linguistics check that's going to be worth more than that.

They're DC higher than 28. Come on, Troy. Don't lie. I rolled to 8. Make it 30. I rolled to 8, too. Make it 32. Hell yeah.

You did not roll, Joe. I did. No. I rolled. I didn't see that roll. I rolled right. I just rolled. I deny all of that.

Hold on. I rolled for Joe. Matthew, roll. Two. No, I rolled. I rolled right... I just rolled. I deny all of that. Hold on, I rolled for Joe. Matthew, roll. Two. No, I rolled. Mattie, 17. DC, 20. Son of a bitch.

I hate you. I hate you. He is the worst GM. Every day of my life, I'm looking at you. I'm looking this over, looking this over. Why is this woman talking about the weather, asking about the health of her sister's children, and talking about

Dronwiet Manor? Pembroke. Crazy. High intelligence. Maybe one of the smartest men in all of Galarian. Yeah. There is a code here. For sure.

And by studying it, you crack the code. Yes! And it says the Frost Queen prepares. We permit

the Storm Tyrant to perform our labors. Timetable uncertain. The pond's citadel requires repair. The outsider approaches with key in hand. But now the Pallid Princess's great work begins. And then it says,

we'll see you next week. Oh my god! Oh no! No! Pallid Princess! No, I gotta unpack this! Oh no! Oh my no! No! Son of a bitch! No, I gotta unpack this! Oh, no!

I gotta unpack this! Oh, my God! Baron died at the bubonic plague! Baron died! Baron died at the plague! It took him four days to crack the letter. It took him four days! I finally figured it out!

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