Toni and Ryan - Pre-Paid Anus
Episode Date: December 26, 2021Another grooming mishaps story - and my very expensive car wash mistake. Love ya! Toni xxx Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRy...an on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello, this is Karen.
Hi, Karen.
It's Tony and Ryan.
How are you?
Oh, my God, I'm so good.
How are you?
We're well.
Karen, I don't think I've ever heard someone answer the phone that quickly.
You're like an Olympic phone answerer.
Well, I was so nervous I was going to miss your call,
and so I was sitting in my car.
I had finished a phone call, and I was so nervous that I wasn't going to get it.
Well, we're here now, and we're all friends and family.
However, there is an issue.
Oh, there always is.
Karen said that it's awful.
And her name being Karen as well.
Of course there's a problem.
I know.
So Karen sent me a message saying
you know how it's normally Tony
that has to apologise for
things that she's done.
Well, the tables may have
turned. Okay.
What do you need to apologise for there, Cass?
So, I
was, um,
I always just re-listen to your podcast because it cracks me up and I love it so much.
And I was trying to find another podcast that had something similar and I wound up finding one and it wasn't as good.
It wasn't something I was super excited about. And as I was listening to it, and the very first time I started listening to this new podcast,
I actually got into a car accident.
And so I feel like I should apologize because I feel like I cheated on you guys by listening to another podcast.
So I kind of got, karma came around.
I'm not going to say that you deserve that. Well, that makes one of us.
You see... No, no, hang on. Welfare check.
Are you okay? Kaz, are you all good? I am.
Okay. I am. It's actually all been sorted out finally.
Okay, so when Lara had a car crash, that was our fault. We apologized.
We helped pay for stuff.
We sent flowers.
But when someone crashes having abandoned us, I mean, bad luck, bud.
What were you listening to?
Yeah, what was it?
Just out of interest.
To be honest with you, I can't remember.
It was like a...
So forgettable.
So you cheated on us and it wasn't even worth...
What's her name?
I don't even remember. She meant nothing her name? I don't even remember.
She meant nothing to me.
I can't even remember who she was.
So, Karen, we're wondering,
are we able to get your approval to start today's podcast?
Yes, 110%.
I approve this podcast.
Are you actually going to listen to it
or are you going to go and listen to Hamish Nandy or Joe Rogan or something?
Oh, no, no.
I'm listening to it.
Also, I'm going to totally rub it in my brother's face because he's a part of the podcast as well, but he's not a topper.
Oh.
Sucked in.
This is Karen from Rafe for North Carolina and I approve this podcast.
Welcome to the show.
Hi.
Welcome.
Normally on a Monday we will do feedback.
Yes.
And today will be no different different However, here's the difference
Oh
I reckon
Should we have talked about this before now?
No
Okay, great
I reckon you'll cry during today's feedback
Mate, you know that I'm on the preposus
Precipus
But you see
I'm on the porposus
How would you describe our emotional state?
We are beyond 10.
We are.
If 10 is cooked, we're 55.
Now, I don't want to be overly dramatic.
Yes.
It's been a long year.
It's the festive season.
Emotions are high.
High, so high.
And I reckon this bit of feedback is going to do us in hard.
I actually can't.
Can we skip it?
No.
So if you enjoyed The Notebook and having a good juicy cry
and someone DM'd me the other day going, oh, I just heard that episode.
Oh, sorry about that.
This is worse.
Great.
In a good way.
It's a good story, but it's.
Okay, well, before I let you get sad, I'm going to get you angry.
I'm going to get you right up. Hit me with all the angles. Okay, well, before I let you get sad, I'm going to get you angry. I'm going to get you right up.
Hit me with all the angles.
Okay, so today's going to be a bit of an emotional rollercoaster.
So I haven't had my car cleaned in probably like five years.
What?
And, yeah, I know.
Like it's a hot mess is it fair to say that when i'm in your
car it was pretty obvious that you hadn't washed it in a while yeah like because there was just
like dirt and debris everywhere and like you know like wrappers coffee lids oh no i'm not that kind
of guy yeah but i'm not that kind like because i don, it's not normally like rubbish, apart from receipts.
There's always a million fucking receipts in the car
because you need to use them to pay for, like,
parking at a shopping centre or whatever.
Anyway, so there was just, like, dirt and it was just, like,
like it was fine.
The air felt thick.
Oh, fuck off.
But, yeah, it wasn't great.
And before that, I used to get my car washed every time it got serviced.
Yeah, they usually do that as part of the thing, right?
Well, I haven't had my car serviced in, like, five years.
You have driven me around in that car that hasn't been serviced in five years.
Yeah, but before that, it was serviced very regularly.
Oh, I've got new tyres.
Is that bad?
Good?
I don't know.
I guess so.
Fucking anyway.
So even before that, it had never had the inside cleaned.
And, well, it did get the one clean once when I,
you might remember that little story of when I got a bit sick.
Is that that car?
And shat in my car, yep.
Fuck me.
When you told that story, I had no idea that was your car.
I sit in that car all the time.
Well, it was, the shit was on my side because I was driving. So the car where you shat yourself. Is in the car park right now.
Yeah. If anyone comes at me for the tower story, just remember that Tony shat in her own car and
still drives it. Yeah. Yeah. So it needed a bit of a birthday, let's just say. Yeah. Anyway, so
before. You got a bucket in the mop? That sounds like something that a responsible person would do, but no.
I thought, treat yourself.
I'll book my car in and let it be known I've got like a pretty,
like it's a very average car.
Like I didn't roll in with a Mercedes and go,
here's the keys, have it ready in an hour.
I don't even own a car.
So for you to be here, oh, it's not the best car.
It must be nice to not ride a bike like I do.
It's a Toyota Yaris, 2013.
Ooh, I used to have one of those when I could afford it.
So I was like rocking up in my little Yaris and I was quite embarrassed
because every single car, when you see those car wash places,
like the hand wash cars, hand wash places,
they're always like on the main road and there's a million nice cars in there.
There's like Audis, Mercedes, whatever.
Do you know why that is?
Because they're the only people that can afford it.
No.
Oh.
So there's one near my mum's house.
Apparently.
And your mum has a Mercedes so she'd know.
She'd know.
One of them was the owner's car and the owner's daughter or something.
They put the flashy cars out there as like a marketing thing.
Oh.
To kind of imply and show off, hey, look how great we are.
People trust us with their expensive cars.
People trust us with our cars.
If you care about your car like these rich people do, you would come to us.
That's part of their game.
Well, they're making a bit of fucking cash.
Is that right?
Yeah.
So you felt a bit silly in the US?
Well, I was a bit intimidated to go in there,
but you pay online beforehand.
Yep.
So I go online and I was like, cool, I want the interior detail.
Whoa.
I know, which is like bougie.
Usually when you're selling, right?
Or when it's fucked and it was fucked.
Yeah, and you're at that stage.
Yeah.
The interior detail, it comes with like a power wash of the outside,
but it's like a massive like interior clean.
They like shampoo and steam clean all the seats.
They clean it to buggery.
Yeah.
$165.
What?
For a car clean?
For a car clean.
I would have done it for $12 with my bucket and mop.
But it wouldn't have been good.
That's not going to be good.
Well, you get what you pay for.
Well, having said that, you could have paid me $12.
Yeah. You've paid 160 something. Did you look in and after and think this is worth 160 bucks?
It's so clean. And it was like a bit of a Christmas present to myself. I was like,
I feel really crappy about my car at the moment. I just want to get it cleaned,
get it all taken care of. Anyway, so when I paid the $165 online. I drive in there, give them the keys, whatever.
But the only one that I could get a booking at was the one in a shopping centre.
And anyway- The one across the street from where you live.
So I drive down there and obviously you have to get a ticket on the way in because it's
at a shopping centre.
Yeah.
Obviously, you have to get a ticket on the way in because it's at a shopping centre.
Yeah.
I've already paid $165 on the website.
Yep.
Go down there, drop the keys off.
He goes, yep, cool.
When do you need it by?
I go, I actually live across the street.
Yep.
So you just text me when it's done, bro. I'm in no rush because even if you message me as you're closing,
I can sprint across the road and grab the car.
It's not as if I had to order an Uber to get there or anything.
I was like, cool, I can be here in a flash.
He goes, I really appreciate that.
People are normally really pushy.
And I was like, bro, I fucking get it.
It's Christmas, all good.
I'm like, don't worry about it.
Drop it off at 12 o'clock.
Get a text at 6.30.
Whoa.
So it's been there all day. And I was like, fuck, are they going to close? And my car's like stuck in the thing. And. Whoa. So it's been there all day.
Yeah.
And I was like, fuck, are they going to close?
And my car's like stuck in the thing.
Stuck in there, yeah.
And I didn't need it.
So I was like, even if it is, not a big deal.
Yeah.
I go over there.
Torbs comes with me.
We wander over.
We were like, cool, we'll grab some stuff for dinner at the same time from the Coles.
We go down there.
And he goes, yep, all done.
Make sure you leave the windows rolled down because the seats are a bit wet for a bit and all good.
And Torbs goes, oh, thank you so much, mate, grabs the keys and goes,
oh, do you guys validate parking?
Yeah.
And the guy goes, no, mate.
What do you mean?
They don't validate parking.
So you've had to pay a six-hour bill for being in the shopping centre
when you're on there, what?
Because you were being nice.
Because I was like, hey, bro, you take your time.
He goes, oh, we're so busy.
Like, oh, and I was like, mate, I'm cool.
So you're doing them a favour.
I did them a favour.
And you know how much the fucking parking was?
One hour is like a dollar, two hours, two dollars.
But as soon as you get over three or four, can I guess?
Yes, please hours $2. But as soon as you get over three or four, can I guess?
Yes, please.
$38.
That's actually how much it was.
Really?
Yeah.
Holy shit.
It was like, so we'd gone into six hours plus territory.
Oh, yeah.
So it's like $40 fucking dollars.
On top of your $160. I've just paid $165 fucking dollars.
Are you fucking serious?
They can't, like, cut a fucking deal with the fucking shopping centre?
Are you sure they don't do that?
Mate, I asked the guy, he was the owner, and Torbs goes,
hey, do you guys do parking?
He goes, no, mate.
And Torbs was like, oh, okay.
And I was like.
Question.
And you know I'm a challenger.
Yes, you are a challenger.
Yep, in the best way.
I would challenge this.
Is there a chance.
Yes.
That, because I could probably guess that you would take your receipt
from the place and you scan that at the parking thing
and that will wave you through for free.
They don't give you a receipt.
You don't get anything because you pay it all online beforehand.
Was there a printout?
No, they don't give you anything.
When you bought it online, you didn't
receive an email with the printout or anything? No, it just
all it had was like a job reference
number. Really? Mate, honestly.
Because this is what I'm just going to ask.
Yes. Maybe the guy was like,
as in we don't validate it here,
you'd scan your code at the door.
But they didn't give us like any
literature, paperwork to be like, this is your thing. Oh, but they didn't give us, like, any literature, paperwork,
to be like, this is your thing.
All right, well, now that we've ticked that box,
this is a fucking outrage, mate.
You call a current affair, you call today, tonight.
It's time to take these guys down.
I know.
They're running a scan.
But here's my theory.
So as if I'm not fucked off enough.
You've paid $200 for a car.
$200!
Holy shit.
This close to Christmas.
Do you know what I mean?
Yeah, that's a present for the whole family.
I know.
Like fucking Santa's not coming to our house this year.
I've got a theory though because if I had have walked over there by myself,
I wouldn't have asked.
I would have happily paid the $40, driven out and gone.
Me being too anxious to ask has cost me $40.
I hate this.
I hate this so much.
But yeah.
Me being too anxious to ask has cost me $40.
I hate this.
I hate this so much, but yeah. But Torbs, he asked, and now I'm fucked off that I know they don't validate.
You would have rather paid it assuming that you could have got it done.
But like chose not to.
So who's the jerk?
Torbs.
It's his fault.
It's all his fault.
The guy who doesn't drive a car, is it his fault for paying $200 for a car wash.
All right, so a few weeks ago we talked about grooming mishaps.
Yep.
Right?
Very gruesome.
Yeah.
Normally it was people doing a DIY at-home job.
I'll do it myself, save a bit of cash.
Which is where you expect it a little bit.
Yeah, I've just spent $200 on a car park, the least I can car wash,
the least I'm going to do is all this.
Yeah, I can't afford to get someone to professionally do my giant.
But when you do get someone to professionally do your giant,
you'd expect them, in the title it's there, to be a professional.
At the giant, yeah.
What you're about to hear is the least professional giant work
I've ever heard.
And you've seen some shit.
I've seen some shit.
I've seen some shit.
Let's put the call through here.
Hello?
Hey, is that Jess?
Yes, it is.
Hello.
Jess, hello.
It's Tony and Ryan here.
How are you?
Good.
How are you guys doing?
We're well.
Hi, Jess. Hello. How are you? Yeah, hello. It's Tony and Ryan here. How are you? Good. How are you guys doing? We're well. Hi, Jess.
Hello.
How are you?
Yeah, good.
Now, I've just told Tony that once she hears what happens to you,
that she's going to be nervous to ever go to a beauty salon again.
Is that just straight off the bat a fair thing to say?
Look, I don't want to shame anyone's beauty regime,
but my experience was maybe unique or maybe it's relatable. I don't want to shame anyone's beauty regime, but my experience was maybe unique or maybe it's relatable.
I don't know.
It feels like it's relatable from how people are reacting online.
Yeah, so I saw this story on TikTok and I was like, oh, my God.
Tell us what happened.
Okay, I'll tell you what happened and we can just kind of Q&A it out after.
Okay, great.
Okay, so it's my birthday, like, last year,
and my parents were like, what do you want?
And I had been, like, thinking about getting laser,
but I have no money.
So they were like, don't worry about it.
We'll get this for you.
Yeah.
Wake up on my birthday, which also, like,
rough start to, you know, get paid for full body laser by your parents.
But anyway, like, I get up on my birthday birthday and they've given me this like full body package,
which also at the time I was like, I'm just going to get my moustache.
And they're like, no, we'll get everything off.
I was like, okay, good.
Parents must be doing all right.
It's not cheap.
Oh, it's not cheap.
Also, you should see how hairy I was.
So they knew it was, they were like, this one's necessary.
So they really fucked up.
They mortgaged the house.
We're your parents.
We're hairy.
We brought you into this world.
We made you hairy.
Yeah, done it too.
I go, I've had razor for a while, but this one specific treatment I go in.
And I don't know about you, but like when I book,
I'll book for like the like cute stuff.
Like I'll do like, yeah, my legs or my armpits.
But then I just like, you know, I show up like, yeah, my legs, um, or my armpits. But then I,
just like, you know, I show up and I have, have like, I happen to magically shave everything.
And, um, so you do the thing where you like kind of lie on your stomach and you just kind of look over your shoulder at them and you're like, yeah, just, you know, hit the back and, um,
kind of the ass region. I don't know if that's something you're familiar with, but, um,
then I, so at this time I get, you know, the whole back part looked after.
And then you go out into the waiting room and there's so many people around.
Yeah.
And I'm just like kind of doing the cute thing and being like, oh, should I wait six weeks?
And it's like, come in three.
Like you don't need to wait six.
And so in front of this room full of people, she's basically like setting me up and she's like, okay,
so don't worry, doll.
Like you just have to fix us up for the areolas.
But you know, your asshole was prepaid.
You had a prepaid anus in front of this room full of people.
And I tell you, she said the phrase prepaid anus 10 times.
I was like just breathing through it. And then she had the had the audacity like do you need some more laser aid I was like I don't need
shit from you like I'll see you in three weeks oh my god it was I mean so I I told this story
and I put it on TikTok and the reactions have been just so delicious because some people are
like oh I've had a similar experience.
And I take no offense.
People were like, I would die if this happened.
I was like, I take no offense.
I went back a few weeks later, and while she was doing my mustache,
she was like, so do you usually laser your forehead?
I'm like, laser my forehead?
Like, you have hair on their forehead?
Yes.
It's a wild world.
It's a wild world.
So it was hilarious.
The craziest thing, and, like, I love it because also for my birthday present, my mum sent my dad in.
So I was like, my dad prepaid for that anus.
I was like, absolutely.
Like, it's a good time to be me.
Oh, my God.
I remember dying of embarrassment when my dad bought me tampons.
This is a whole nother level.
Oh, I love it.
But I love it.
I know people get sensitive about it, but I'm like, let's normalise,
you know, let's normalise the arsehole.
Why not?
I mean, Tony's been preaching this for years.
Hashtag normalise the arsehole.
Make a trend.
I love that.
I'll do a fun run with you to normalise the arsehole.
I think we get it out there.
Yeah. Let people know.
No pants.
Get the arsehole out. Just two get it out there. Yeah. Let people know. No pants, get the arsehole out.
Just two bearing.
We'll just two bear around town.
This is Karen from Reef for North Carolina
and you're listening to Tony and Ryan.
We would like to give a massive thank you,
massive shout-out to a couple of our champion tappers.
There's some new ones this week.
Kerry Tao, Diana Creeps, thank you so much.
Matthew, Stacey, Jared Short and Scotty D.
Scotty D.
Muchos apreciato.
Thank you very much. Hey, tomorrow on the show, things you can say at the supermarket.
And also in the bedroom.
Now, I don't know if you saw the post I did in the Facebook group.
Yeah, I always say it, but I never read them because I like to come up with them.
Did you see the photo?
Yeah, I did actually.
Was that from a pornography that you watched?
No, that was Gwyneth Paltrow.
Oh, was it?
Hang on, let me look.
Yeah, have a look at it.
Sorry, I'm just Googling it on my computer.
Sorry.
Don't know why I said that.
Sorry, it fucking is a bit of a process.
Let's go to media.
Oh, can you do that?
Do you press media?
How does that work?
You see it there?
Oh, yeah, that is Gwyneth Paltrow. Fuck, she looks good.
She looks fantastic. I mean, she's a bit of a babe, isn't she? Well, she's an interesting character, but she's a babe. There's another one where she's wearing significantly less
than that. But normally when I do those posts, I literally just Google like
sexy something. Insert thing here. Oh, we're doing at the golf course.
Sexy golf. Sexy golf. And thing here. Oh, we're doing at the golf course. So I just. Sexy golf.
Sexy golf.
And I typed in sexy supermarket and I was like,
is that Gwyneth Paltrow?
And I was like, well, I'm choosing that one.
Thank you very much.
Yeah, nice.
I didn't even notice.
She looks good.
She does look good.
Good for her.
Good for her.
That's on tomorrow's show.
They've got a few kids, haven't they?
Gwyneth and Chris Martin.
I know that they've consciously decoupled now,
but they've got a few kids.
Yeah, Apple.
They were one of the original weird names.
Weird names, yeah.
Now it's everyone's.
And wouldn't you be fucked off if your name was Apple
because you'd never get the Instagram handle?
No.
You'd be fucked off by that.
Think ahead.
Yeah.
Unless they did.
They beat Apple.
And they've got it and Apple bought it.
Look it up.
Okay.
Are you just trying to keep me busy so that I don't talk on this podcast?
Did Gwyneth Paltrow.
I just would have gone Instagram.com slash Apple.
Oh, yeah.
There's an insight.
All right.
Move on.
Move on to feedback.
It's not going to be good next week.
On Monday, we normally go to feedback.
Oh, fuck.
It's a sad thing coming, isn't it?
It's not sad.
Oh.
But it could be tears. Oh, well, that's different. I thought it, isn't it? It's not sad. Oh. But it could be tears.
Oh, well, that's different.
I thought it was sad.
Well, it's sad at the start.
Normally it's fun, but I just wanted to share this with you.
Okay.
And again, it's the festive season.
Emotions are high.
We're feeling sentimental.
We are.
Are you ready for this?
We're a bit sad as well.
Aren't we?
Oh, no.
No, no.
Kate.
Hi, Kate.
Message through.
Now, I've been back and forth with Kate in the DMs for a month or so.
Well, did you off now?
Yeah.
Three-person thing.
Yeah, she's involved, yeah.
It's a group chat.
Kate says,
Yeah, she's involved, yeah.
It's a group chat.
Kate says, I went through a terribly abusive five-year relationship slash marriage with someone who was Australian.
Oh, sorry, Kate.
Now, this is really sad.
That's awful.
She's moved on from that relationship, which is good news.
Yeah, good for you.
I'm happy to hear that.
But unfortunately, and I didn't even realise this was the thing,
but it kind of makes sense, a trigger for her that kind
of took her back was hearing an Australian accent.
Oh, like PTSD of the, oh, wow, that's so interesting.
Anytime she heard about Australia or just heard an Australian accent,
it just took her straight back.
And she said it's a really, it's a big shame and it's a shame for us
because Australia's full of great people.
Obviously there's always going to be a few bad apples.
Yeah.
And I don't want.
Like anywhere.
Yeah, like anywhere.
And I don't want you to not like Australia because of some jerk.
Well, not even just not like it but be actually triggered to a point
where you're like I can't engage with that.
Three years she's just not been able to deal with Australian people.
Oh, poor Kate.
Kate says, I found you guys on TikTok and you were both so funny
that I was able to listen to a few clips and I was actually able
to watch the clip.
And for me, that's like a really big deal.
A big step, yeah.
She told her therapist about it and now you guys are a part
of my exposure therapy.
So we have been prescribed.
That means we could claim this podcast on tax.
Claim what?
No, that's not what it is.
Is that how that works?
No.
I feel like this is that scene from that show where, like,
we just write it off.
It's the government, people.
It's a write-off.
The write-off, people.
So a few months back I was still triggered by the Australian accent
and then a month ago I was able to watch a few TikToks of yours at a time.
A few weeks ago, I started listening to the podcast
and I listened to five, eight minutes before I, you know,
started getting a bit anxious and stuff.
Last week, I listened to a full episode for the whole time
and I loved it, says Kate.
I've now listened and caught up every day since.
I've been listening to multiple episodes a day.
And now, thanks to Tony and Ryan,
I no longer associate the Australian accent
with an abusive relationship.
My brain has untrained itself.
I now associate the Australian accent with fun and friendship.
Oh, wow.
I can't tell you how much this means to me and how nice it is
to laugh with so much less inner conflict than previously.
You're both so amazing.
Kate.
Got her.
I can see that tear.
You're trying to hold it.
Gotcha.
That's really special.
And also, I mean, that's all you.
Like you've put the hard work into that,
but it feels really amazing that something as stupid
as what we do every week, you know,
like Ryan talking about shitting on a towel or me talking
about jerking off in a fucking float tank,
like as if they're things that are helping people.
Do you know what I mean?
Yeah.
And to hear that from you, Kate, is just so special.
You've done the work but we're so glad to be part of it.
And thank you for sharing that with us as well.
It wouldn't have been easy to share that story.
Absolutely not.
I have a final piece of news which is my love to see it for this week.
Oh, okay.
Play the music.
Kate and I have been.
Play the music.
Well, if you love to see it, you have to play the music.
I was going to push it on the moment.
Oh, it's build up.
It's production value.
Okay, yep.
So I've been back and forth with Kate for a while.
Yes.
Because she said, you know, we've been back.
Been checking in, been checking in.
That's nice of you. And she said, you know, we've been checking in, been checking in. That's nice of you.
And she said, I got a Christmas surprise.
As of yesterday, I am officially divorced.
I'm free.
I'm back, baby.
It's over.
Oh, my God.
Yes.
Oh, fuck yeah, Kate.
Love to see that.
Oh, fuck him off.
Good on ya.
And because of all the bullshit you've been through,
to have that lingering over your head and a bit of paperwork, you know,
they take for ages.
The admin.
The fucking admin.
Yep, that's what it is, yep.
Could have cost you more than Tony's car wash, I'm guessing.
Oh, I doubt it.
But she's free.
She's back at 2022.
She's got rid of that PSD.
She's got rid of that jerk.
She's back. Next year's her year, guys.
Oh. You love to see that.
You do love to see that. Oh, Kate,
fuck, I'm that pleased for you. Yep.
Oh, well now, do you
know what I love to see? This is, I didn't have this written
down, but you know what I love to see? What?
Kate could now enjoy Kath and Kim.
What do you mean? Because
she's no longer triggered by the Australian
accent. Oh, yes, of course. Kate could go and enjoy Kath and Kim. Maybe do you mean? Because she's no longer triggered by the Australian accent.
Kate could go and enjoy Kath and Kim.
Maybe that'll trigger some other... No, Kath and Kim does nothing
but bring happiness to the world.
I encourage it.
I'm your therapist now
and I'm telling you.
Being prescribed Kath and Kim.
Do you want my actual You Love
to Say It? It's not as fancy as yours, but on Christmas Eve,
I was at Coles and they had these big buckets of carrots,
like seconds.
Yeah.
You know when they've got carrots?
Yeah, the carrots that are like a bit fucking how you going?
Not quite right.
Yeah.
Yeah, NQR.
Yeah.
A bit how you going?
Where's that from?
Have you never heard that?
I say that a lot.
I just haven't heard that in 20 years. Oh, I say that a lot. Oh, it's a little bit how you going? Oh, that's a little bit how you're going. Where is that from? Have you never heard that? I say that a lot. I just haven't heard that in 20 years.
Oh, I say that a lot.
He's a little bit how you're going.
Oh, that's a little bit how you're going.
That's a bit how's your father.
You know when people say that?
That's fucking Australian.
Anyway, so all these carrots that were a bit how you're going,
they had them in this big bucket at the front of Coles,
and it said take one carrot each for Rudolph.
Like take it with you and pop it, like, on your doorstep for the reindeer.
So you've got your milk and cookies for Santa and then a little carrot for Rudolph.
You'll love to see that.
You'll love to.
That's so cute.
That is so cute.
How many carrots do they eat in a night?
Bloody must be a lot.
One per house, a couple million.
Yeah.
But, I mean, how many cookies is Santa having?
Well, he's fat.
Those reindeer are fit, though.
Oh, yeah, that's true.
Did you know that?
cookies is Santa having?
Well, he's fat.
Those reindeer are fit, though.
Oh, yeah, that's true.
Did you know that male reindeers lose their antlers in the winter?
So Santa's sleigh is pulled by women, which I love to see that as well.
I love to be pulled by women.
I love to see that too. Ah!
How could you turn such a beautiful moment into that?
Hi, I'm Ryan.
Welcome to the Journey Around podcast.
We'll see you guys tomorrow.
Tomorrow, like we said.
Supermarket in the bathroom.
Bedroom.
Supermarket in the bathroom.
All right, we'll chat to you tomorrow.
Nice.
I'm just trying to be part of the meow joke.
No, I love it.
I like that you want to be part of the meows.
Someone the other day messaged me and they were like,
hey, have I missed an inside joke about the meows?
And I was like, no, there's nothing to get.
I'm just a fuckwit.
I'm just a fuckwit.
She's just a bit how she got on ASMR.
There you go. I am a bit how you got on. You are. No, I like it a rugby. She's just a bit how's it going, how's it going? There you go.
I am a bit how you going.
You are.
No, I like it like that.
I've never how'd you going more than anyone that I've how'd you going to you.
You get that on the big jumps, don't you?
Yeah.
Meow, meow, meow.
Meow, meow, meow.
Meow.