Trillbilly Worker's Party - Episode 69: The Woke Strawman and Other Tall Tales
Episode Date: September 13, 2018On our 69th episode, Tarence identifies a disturbing trend in social media wokeness, Tanya lets the fame go to her head, and Tom verifies the tallest tale he's ever told. Don't forget to check us ou...t on Patreon, where we release weekly episodes every Sunday: patreon.com/trillbillyworkersparty
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Let me get these levels checked
I've got the good levels
And I'm going to
Break your neck
Okay, well while you're taking levels
I need to clarify
The joke I made
About the Comptown book
Listen
Please do
I knew That it was Choppo's fucking book right right
but what i did slightly also think is that come town was slang for choppo trap house
i thought it was just like a funny thing people call choppo trap house
now i know it's its own podcast
i didn't i didn't realize i i do did you dwell on that for a few days uh no but what made me
think of it is uh you just signed me into the triple oh and it's the first and it's the first
thing that came up with official come town podcast and i was like oh okay well there we go. Oh, Jesus Christ. It doesn't matter.
Pretty much is all the same anyways.
That was my point, I think.
Except I actually thought they were the same.
The actual, literal same.
Because every time I saw anyone talk about Comptown,
I just assumed they were talking about Choppo.
When you said you needed to clarify something,
I thought you were going,
I thought it was going to be like a legitimately problematic joke or something you thought you know those i
don't understand at all but i'm actually really problematic i never do come to terms with it
realize you're doing it no no i never do come to terms with those right right right
and if i do i wouldn't admit it publicly. I'm a politician that doubles down on the dumb shit.
You know, like, we know you wrecked that car and buried that body.
And I'm like, what?
I've never driven a car.
I've never seen a body.
That's the Tom Sexton, like.
Oh, yeah.
That's the Tom Sexton way.
Deny.
Deny.
Deny. Deflect. Always deny. like oh yeah that's the tom sexton way deny deny deny deflect always deny always be denying
yeah it's like the glenn gary glenn ross of i know he's so bad it's like oh hey tom i thought
i saw you didn't see me at the grocery store like not a big deal he'll he will deny things that are totally innocuous.
No repercussions
at all. You can just
tell me.
He really does.
Before you can
finish that, he's like, oh no, no.
I never heard of him.
It's just his default
mode to always be
juking and jiving.
Dodging.
Heisman.
Tom Sexton.
Dodge the Tom.
Tom the Dodge Sexton.
Shit.
I got to get my inhaler.
So it sounds like Lucian is straight up making this movie.
I saw him in Heritage the other day.
Yeah.
I told y'all he was going to be here, didn't I?
Yeah.
I told him I would.
I didn't remember if I actually did, though.
Yeah, I saw him in there.
Oh, good.
Because I wasn't in town.
But, yeah, Tommy was hanging out with him, so I asked Tommy who he interviewed.
What's up?
Oh, fuck.
Are those Girl Scout cookies?
No, those are parents' sweets right here.
Oh, fuck.
Those are for me?
Oh dude
Nice
You want some Tanya?
This man literally brings gifts for
Terrence
No mention of me
Not even on the radar
Watch my cat motherfucker and you'll get gifts
I put in the work for this Tanya
Hey do something for me, Tonya.
I watched
Arrow for a week
and
read
old back issues of Jackman to her
so she'd go to sleep.
Do you want some?
No, I'm good right now.
My macaroons.
I'm still not even clear at 32 years of age
what a fucking macaroni is.
Oh, eat one.
You never had one?
I have,
but I don't remember it.
They're delicious.
I had macaroons
when I went to Europe
that time.
Back in the 80s, eh?
That one time.
What is this, Tom?
Incense of the West.
Burner and 20 bricks of pinon incense.
Made in New Mexico.
You're right.
It's from Albuquerque.
Which is funny because y'all were in Michigan.
Yeah.
Real colloquial gift.
We just saw one of those.
You know those hipstery tchotchke shops?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Like Trader Joe's.
That's where the macaroons came from.
Look at this.
It really is
like an incense brick.
I think you have to build it and it takes the form
of a steam engine when you're done.
No way.
It's like Lincoln Logs, for instance.
Lincoln Logs. Jesus.
You've got to be shitting me.
It could be a fun craft that'll make your house smell good, too.
Oh, my God. Or burn it down.
They kind of look like fiber pills.
You ever taken fiber?
You know me.
I'm all about that fiber.
More times than I care to admit it.
I gotta have that fiber.
I thought you'd do shit all the time.
Well.
It can go either way.
The thing is, is you want to keep it regular.
That's the key.
So you don't want it to, you don't want it like, you know, you don't want the runs, but
you also don't want it clocked up.
And so.
This is common sense.
Just the right amount of fiber is the key there.
Just the right amount of fiber.
Exactly.
Exactly.
Well, I ate a salad for lunch like I fucking hate myself.
So I feel like I'm.
I ate a salad for lunch too.
On the fiber train.
You mean you eat salads when you're going through particular periods periods of self-loathing no i just anytime i every time i eat a salad
i think about the like women laughing into salads stock photos and i always go on a spiral of like
you get self-conscious when you eat a salad in public yeah you feel like you're a stock
photo is that why is this people this is what people want to see me doing is this what is this
like gonna really give people a lot of joy seeing me eat this fucking spinach yeah you have a public
persona you gotta protect and cultivate now except i was sitting alone on a couch in my office we
were at that show on Friday, Saturday night.
And I swear to God, every time I ran into Tanya, she'd be like, someone came up to me
about, asked me if I was in the Tribblies.
And I was just like.
People all weekend hit me up.
I met four new Tribblies fans this weekend that I didn't know before.
Yeah.
I mean, I don't feel like, do I post that many selfies that people would just recognize
me in the wild?
Well, it's kind of like what i was
saying we do have that one photo shoot yeah but we're really not visual yet i feel like do people
know what we look like i'm pretty anonymous out of the three of us i guess if you follow me on
instagram tom is pinching but i don't feel like a lot of tribbly fans follow me on instagram my
instagram is mostly people i know yeah Yeah. Damn. Anyway, yeah.
It was, yeah, I met Drew
Frog. He was cool.
Shout out to Drew. Drew's
a real one. I like Drew. Yeah, I do too. And then
we square danced. That's cool. He wasn't
my partner, but he was in the square dance.
I square danced for the first time in years. You know, I
never fuck with a square dance. I'm usually just having
to work or just like whatever. I gotta be around.
I don't really like square dancing. I got day drunk enough to square dance. I don't like being told how to dance. That usually just having to work or it's like whatever i gotta be around but i don't really like square dancing i got day drunk enough to square dance i don't
like being told how to dance that's why i don't like it you know what i'm saying well
this call y'all know abby abby's been doing this like hip gender neutral calling yeah and i wanted
to see if i could tell a difference okay so what what do you say partner yeah that's i guess that's already that's already
in square dance yeah you just know but yeah that's i don't think you have to add gender neutral to
that it is by design no if you notice most square dances are highly gendered like that's true yeah
it's like okay because if you're if you're like gonna so if i'm gonna like pair up with another
girl to square dance they will come and say which one of you is the man i've literally been asked that question before
fascinating and you have because you have to decide who's on which side blah blah this
it doesn't matter why is that nobody fucking cares is there like feats of gymnastics that like
they presume only men can do or something why do they during square dancing? No, it's just...
I don't know why. I mean, I don't know the
fucking history of square dancing, nor do I
care, but...
Actually, I do care because I think
it's a pretty colonizing
history. If I had a dollar
for every time somebody asked me
which one
was the man.
Speaking of partner, though, speaking of of partner i'm trying to find this uh screenshot tom already knows where i'm going with this i've been sitting on
this one for like two weeks because i wanted to talk to tanya about it oh how y'all decided
mind squeezes main squeeze partners out mind squeeze is in That's what you say
Oh
Oh oh
Well
Tom did
Well
There's
A pro pros of that
Um
One tweet we were
Talking about earlier
Apropos
Apropos
Apropos
How do you say that
I think it's apropos
What's that
What is the word
Apropos
Oh like
A derivative of appropriate?
Fuck, Tom, I can't find it now.
I had it today.
I had it earlier today because I was...
But basically, it was the tweet about how partner...
Oh, here it is.
The gender neutral word partner really has been hijacked by progressive women who don't
want to admit the fact that they are actually dating the white cishet dude bro they've been
loudly railing against their whole
woke lives. Now this was
a big about a month ago
or so. We had this very conversation
about an Apple shop intern this summer. She
kept referring to her partner and we were like oh
cool. And then this loser
dude showed up. We were like come on.
You knew
what you were doing here. You knew this was false
salesmanship. Like what's your deal? He sucked so bad. So you were doing here You knew this was false salesmanship
Like what's your deal
He sucked so bad
So you were expecting
Yeah
Absolutely
So what you're saying is just say boyfriend
I don't know
I am definitely one who's like boyfriend girlfriend
Sounds so juvenile
But do you use partner Tom
Sometimes Tom sometimes my bitch
no thompson's ball and chain ball and chain is gender neutral no ball and chain
that's the gender neutral This particular tweet
This particular tweet though is of
A series of tweets I've seen
Lately that engage
In I'm creating this term
On our show because we are the progenitors
Of the woke reach right
What did you just say I don't have a clue what you just said
You know the woke
Reach like
And what was the P word
Come on Progengenitor real in
the discourse you don't like that word you don't like the gen you don't like progenitor i guess
also i have to admit that i listened to an episode i wasn't on which i hate to do
but now you have to explain to me why i had to hear on our podcast that you don't like to be called t-ray it's okay when you do it it's totally okay when you do it okay i'm a coward
okay well from now on whatever you want from now on it's t-ray call me what you want just don't
call me broke um i don't mind it it's just that sometimes people do it because they can't they don't feel close
enough to me to call me just terrence which is like i know that's not why you do it but some
people do it for that reason um especially yeah yeah yeah like t-ray is less personal than terrence
yeah yeah it's kind of like you know it's just a nickname you know what i mean
Terrence? Yeah.
It's just a nickname.
You know what I mean?
Because I feel like if someone calls me TBT, they
know me. Yeah.
I guess T-Ray's a little different.
No, I think it functions on the same sort
of level as TBT.
It doesn't work for Tom, I guess,
because it would be T-Sex.
That's how he is in my phone.
That's really the best.
The sexy boy.
Tom used to have a radio show called Sexton in the Morning, which was great.
That's bizarre.
And Sexton in the Evening.
And now you've got Sexton in the Evening, which is...
Sometimes.
Yeah, sometimes.
Occasionally.
Yeah, no, there's...
So, no, the tweet I just read... Okay so you know rephrase what you fucking say okay
we are the originators is that a right was that a right synonym tom i think so of what you would
call the woke reach you know the example we gave in the episode maybe you weren't in was that
some guy was doing the
fish no she was there on the dance floor we were talking about when keeping it what goes wrong yeah
yeah yeah you were on that one yeah but there is a trend i've noticed lately in twitter that i don't
know why i mean sure it's been around forever probably on tumblr for a while we just need to
remember when we were desperately trying to figure out a, like, a segment?
Like, we're going to have a common segment.
We never did figure one out.
We don't have a segment.
Oh, oh, oh.
We have several segments.
I would say now we do.
We just don't call them that?
Well, we've got Speak Your Peace.
We've got Tom's Tennis Take.
That never comes up when I'm here.
Well, that would just, we just made that one up.
That was just a request.
That's by request. I'd like the tennis take, but I feel here. Well, that would just, we just made that one last week. That was just a request. That's by request.
I'd like the tennis take, but I feel like.
This is a new segment.
Twitter trends.
It's definitely a segment that we just need to coin.
This one's a sub segment under the segment.
This is a sub segment.
This is, this one is what I would call, I'm calling it the woke straw man.
You know, after the sort of, you know, somebody's, you know, rhetorical. What'd you say a straw man You know after the sort of You know somebody's
Rhetorical
What did you say a straw man is Tom?
You create this sort of false
Just this false character
To illustrate a point about society
That's not even like nobody even abides by
Right well I think there's something
That I'm calling the woke straw man
And the partner tweet is one example of it
What it does
is it creates a demographic of people that don't exist and then attributes just just so you can
sort of like wokely attack it for the retweets and the faves you know what i'm saying so um
so that one was one of them the one you just mentioned was like the progenitor which one i feel like the uh partner partner wouldn't right well
that's the first if we're going first in the genre yeah if we're going to a unified theory of woke
straw men people who yada yada yada whatever it is yes yeah i i wrote down a few today um that
if we turn this into a segment people should submit their own because it's kind of fun. You can just actually,
it's very easy to create.
One that I saw yesterday
from Slate,
because I'm reading this book about
Bonobo.
Bonobo?
Bonobos?
Whatever.
Like the instrument?
Like the primate.
Like the primate.
The primate, yeah.
The animal.
And I did a Google search of them last night.
And the first thing that came up was this article in Slate.
It says, why do we idolize chimps when we could be imitating feminist bonobo?
To me, this is a perfect example of the woke straw man.
No one idolizes chimps.
Not one person.
Not one person idolizes chimps.
We think they're cute and kind of quirky when they communicate with us.
Right, but they can rip your arms off.
They're incredibly violent.
Yeah, Pack of Chimps will rip your shit off.
But they only did that just so they could posit the second part.
We should be imitating the feminist Bonobo.
I feel like there's a tributary here to when people communicate with...
tributary here to when people communicate with broadly you know in some on some fucking platform with like the people who didn't show up to this
or the people who did who have missed this bow you know what i mean like subtweet yeah like
okay let's say more about that let's say we had a party in whitesburg and 200 people showed up
okay that's like basically most of more people than we wanted to see probably right but i get
on twitter and i'm like we're fucking raging in whitesburg where are you bitches yeah yeah yeah
everybody's fucking here
you got part of it right because what you've done is create a false demographic that doesn't exist
where are you bitches you bitches is the false demographic here because you bitches are actually
with yeah this was a stupid local example but this happens all the time where it's like
y'all miss this no we all we all saw it yeah y'all sleep y'all sleeping on the...
Actually, Cardi just did this,
so I'm not going to rag her for it,
but she always does this.
I do this to our fans a lot, too.
Well, to people on Twitter.
Like, y'all are sleeping on our podcast.
Yeah.
That is the one...
Yeah, they're really there.
They really are.
Yeah, that's true.
Really, if we're talking about this
in a marketing standpoint,
we should be like,
congrats, y'all.
You're fucking built up this podcast.
Y'all are doing it.
Pretend like everyone's listening to the podcast.
A false demographic is what you're saying.
Oh, yeah, that'd be good.
I'd like to just say thanks to our 6,000 new listeners.
That's what I'm saying.
Y'all keep us number one on 88.7.
Shout out to our
one million listeners last week
and the 30 people
who hit me up at the West 6th event.
Hi!
Crazy how fast success is coming.
I just bought a new Louis bag.
I feel so great. Let's retroactively
apply that to the people that
you said creeped you out
the the hordes of people the hordes of creepy there was a line there was a line at the apple
shop table we thought it was to buy t-shirts it was to talk to me oh god damn it we're gonna have
to fucking knock them boards out get her out out of this guy. Created a monster. Created a fucking monster.
Okay.
So the example of the woke straw man,
I had a few that I went on a walk today and I was trying to think of some
funny ones.
One that I did come up with.
Do you walk with that notepad?
I do.
Tell me you don't.
I do.
Can you imagine?
He looks like a fucking narc.
He's walking through the woods looking for fucking weed patches to write down coordinates. He looks like a fucking narc. He's walking through the woods looking for fucking weed patches to write down coordinates.
He looks like a narc.
You're going to get shot.
I've got my GPS and my...
No, I do walk with it.
I'm sorry.
I keep derailing.
What else am I supposed to write on?
The image of you walking through the woods with this fucking yellow legal pad is just
a little more than I can handle.
The day I'm walking on that path and he comes down out of the hills with that legal pad it's just a little more than the day i see the day i'm walking on that path
and he comes down out of the hills that legal pad and just looks like didn't see you there
i can't um now one example i gave to tom was uh i gotta get the right tone because it's all about
tone too like the woke straw man it's all about tone yeah so it's like those you
who say all coal miners are bathists are awfully silent when it comes to the atrocities of the
asadists it depends on who it depends on the the crux of this joke is that you know who
both the shire outside is in the bath part all you entomologists out there who say that a bug's life wasn't an accurate representative
portrayal of a bug's life need to answer for your utter apathy on the issue of windshields
on high-speed vehicles you see what i'm saying so you can do it these were better examples than I had. Oh my god. Describe to me though
the imagery of a straw man.
Is it like
It's just a conservative term.
Conservatives always accuse
people on the left.
I took a class
in college about rhetoric
and there was like eight rhetorical tools
that you had to memorize.
It was like red herring,
the straw man,
the very, you know, very...
Who's the red herring?
A red herring is kind of like a straw man,
I believe.
It's just like one detail off
from the straw man.
Is a red herring an art?
I don't know.
It's a communist herring is what it is. I don't know it's a communist hearing is what it is i don't know well anyways that was that one
and segment begins and the segment ends we'll we'll go back to that one so uh
yeah uh so what's going on what What's going on in the world?
You went on a vacation
for a week and a half.
How you doing, Tom?
I haven't really hung out with you.
It's the first time
I've seen you, actually.
Is this a new tee?
Huh?
Is this a new tee?
Good fall look?
It is a good fall look.
You love the horizontal stripes.
I know.
I think,
here's a little piece of advice
to our,
to, you know,
our chubby listeners.
Chubby,
our chubby listeners out there,
of which I am not a listener, but you know.
You're not listening to the podcast.
Contrary to what you think,
horizontal stripes actually flatter you more than vertical stripes.
Everybody will tell you differently.
It's not true.
This weekend I bought a dress with some horizontal stripes.
Some are going like diagonal too.
And I thought of you.
I was like, you know what? I think this is flattering.
And I think Tom was right.
Yeah, it is true.
We discussed this over your black and white tee.
Yeah.
Well, I don't really see a whole lot of tees that have vertical stripes though.
They're out there.
You know what?
Mostly a vertical stripe comes in a bowling tee shirt. You know what does have vertical stripes though. They're out there. You know what does have mostly a vertical stripe comes in a bowling t-shirt.
You know what does have
vertical stripes?
Those two beautiful towers
that fell down 17 years ago.
Yesterday.
Fuck has it been that long?
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Have you heard about this guy
from the league?
That makes me feel so old.
Steve Rennes or whatever.
Yeah, the league, the show.
He was a
comedian he is a comedian he like lied for years about all about being a not being in the tower
yeah yeah i did hear about this is this bizarre he stole he stole 9-11 valor well this is what i
was thinking about this last night i wonder if there's anybody out there who has literally the
opposite story who was actually in the towers during 9-11
denies the shit they still the opposite of valor yeah they deny being there yeah and you press them
on their lies more and more and they're well i guess one guy that was like that they caught him
those names osama bin laden no he actually did he how long did it take bin laden to claim
9-11 claim 9-11 pretty instantly right well back then they didn't have twitter so he probably
posted a video to the internet and um no i don't know maybe they sent a v maybe he sent like a vhs
to the white house yeah i don't know i don't know how he would know or how they would know that he took
claim for it terence sent me a text earlier this week he said uh it's been 17 years you think it's
about time to rehabilitate osama bin laden and at first i scoffed at the notion patriot that i am, but... But rehabilitate.
I mean, here's the thing.
Here's the thing.
Is, you know...
I like he's making my case for me.
Okay, I'll just...
Let me flesh that out a little bit
and I'll come with it.
See, Bin Laden was bouj. He was definitely bougie. He was from a very
rich family in Saudi Arabia.
That's the only reason I'm hesitating on this.
Not because he was responsible for
3,000 deaths, but because he was a billionaire.
I just can't wait for
Obama to get senile
and when they
pay him whatever to come out and do
some kind of speech, he'll be like,
I caught Osama.
Just like something crazy like that's the only thing he remembers of his presidency in his old age no probably only remember cylindra that was the only scandal we uh we caught him uh
saw his dick he was checking his dick it It was pretty impressive to be both dead and weather beaten.
Weather beaten.
I'm not going to make that.
Listen, I want to do, there's two things I want to talk about today.
We're not going to talk about 9-11?
There's really nothing to say about it other than.
Literally, we can't say anything that's not been said
I do really love the
Where were you when the world stopped turning post
Of like
On September 11th 2001
I was in my classroom
Everybody does that every year too
I know and I only mention this because
I stopped and read one
From a teacher from my high school
Because I was afraid she might
mention me because I got in a ton of trouble that day because I made jokes you made jokes in the
you were like the moments I woke up from a nap in class literally I mean this is this is one of the
only artifacts because I've a lot of my memories burnt out from from obvious reasons and i was a complete
piece of shit for most of my teenage years no whoa i'd say you were ahead of your head of the curve
but what about being a piece of shit i mean i didn't have or you had you mean irony you were
being ironic about 9-11 is that what you mean by she's 17 years ago that's impressive no no i'm
telling you this is the only...
Because mostly I was a piece of shit.
Just like fighting other girls.
Just like cussing people out. Just like acting
like a complete idiot.
Fighting girls on the softball field. Stupid
shit. But on 9-11
I woke up from a nap
and I was kind of disoriented. And I knew
what had been going on, but like classes had shut
down. I'd say the whole country woke up from a nap that morning.
Anyway, and they were like, oh my God, they've shut down all airports.
All airports are shut down.
And I said, somebody's losing a lot of money.
I got sent to the fucking principal's office.
You just woke up out of a nap and said that?
Yeah, for that. I got sent to the fucking principal's office. You just woke up out of a nap and said that? Yeah, for that.
I got sent to the principal's office.
Come on.
I thought you were going to say something about the falling man or something.
Yeah.
No, I mean, it was the day of, the day it happened.
Yeah.
But I was like, somebody's losing a lot of money if they've shut down all the things.
Someone took a Boeing 747 up the ass.
You know what I'm saying?
That's what's my slight glimpse of of capitalism do y'all remember how
craving people were though like do y'all remember like instantly gas prices shooting through the
roof yeah yeah well it immediately i mean okay since it was 2001 my aunt had been a uh y2k
fucking oh really yeah she had been like her entire fucking garage was like it came it's just
gasoline everything well
2001 happened she just like reverted she just like went right back to it was like
see i've i think in my head i've confused the memory of 9-11 with alia dying
because it happened around the same around thealiyah was more tragic for my personal life. And it happened via a plane crash.
So I think I've confused the two moments.
Well, how'd that Colombian guy got drunk and ran that plane into those two towers killing Aaliyah?
All I remember is an entire Bell County High School
Cause what
What grade were we in
Like
Eighth
We were like
I was eighth
You probably were ninth
No I think I was a
Freshman or sophomore
Or something like that
What year did you graduate
In high school
Oh four
So did Tom right
Were you a three or a four
Yeah I fucking was a four
Oh three
Damn y'all would've been
The big kids
Y'all would've been
Fucking picking on me and shit
Kicking your ass
Kicking my ass
Anyway
Who a fucking bitch?
Don't mean lockers, pussy boy.
I already forgot what I was about to say.
Hey, wait, wait, wait.
We need to read the speaker piece today. Okay.
Because there are some excellent
speaker pieces today. Is this why we started
recording on Wednesdays? Please do.
It's one of the reasons.
I mean, we can record on a Tuesday
if necessary, but sometimes there's just
some real good shit in there. Real gems.
Yeah. I'll kick
it off with this one.
To show how screwed up and sad things
in our country today, I put my flag
stamps on upside down
as a subtle form of
protest. I wish everyone would do that
and i do wish our country would straighten up thank you wow that's pretty good one yeah i like
that i circled it i feel like chris dye could really turn that into a nice painting yeah that's
a good one shout out to all the people using the postal service but sub subversively. I'm gonna do that.
I'm gonna fuck it up, though,
and turn my fucking Elvis stamps upside down.
Yeah, hell yeah.
That's it, man.
I'm just protesting his co-option of black music.
I have a neighbor on Dodie Creek who claims I am a cop.
This is the funniest one. It's funny if some kid just called this guy a cop. Dodie Creek who claims I am a cop this is the funniest one it's funny if some kid
just called this guy a cop listen to this well if I'm a cop do I drive a cop car do I have a cop's
badge do I pack a cop's gun no I don't you're the one my friend who's a cop i just love how cop is like the like a slur now no it's become
listen thank god yeah yeah yeah for the longest time i feel like we didn't have i've been thinking
about this and i kind of want to talk about it on this episode we have with katie sleninger maybe
this weekend but i kind of feel like there's a a rhetoric of dissent or resistance or whatever the fuck you want to call it that we
didn't have 10 years ago so like bootlickers coming back in style and i like that cop calling
somebody a cop as a as a pejorative as a uh it was the cops almost had like a friends of cole
moment where they like figured out their shit and got their valor back
somehow because i i always grew up with people were like don't you know fuck when i was fucking
cops yes yeah i almost i swear i was thinking this week i almost sometimes when i think of a
funny joke i'm like oh i should figure out how to put this on twitter anyway i didn't make it that
far i didn't give a fuck but save it for the podcast yeah uh i was like i wish i remember when the worst thing you could
say about somebody was they were a fucking scab yeah that's what i'm talking about yeah that's
back to the worst yeah scab is back because people know what scab is again yeah if scabbing is again
if we're gonna gauge the left's influence on popular culture i think that's probably our
biggest contribution.
We'll probably lose in the political arena.
We'll probably end up in a fucking labor camp
somewhere outside Kalamazoo.
But here's the thing.
We reintroduced those words back into the lexicon.
Scab.
Scab, cop, bootlicker, et cetera, et cetera.
I was listening to 88.7
the other day and some girl was playing good music
then some guy
got on the air talking about antibiotics
and brain cells
this has to be Hoopman
I hate to have to tell him that I don't believe
he has a brain cell in his head
that was foolishness
if this guy thinks he was being
funny he needs to get a real job and a life
Agreed
You think that was Hoopman?
Who else was talking about brain cells and antibiotics
On the radio?
It definitely was
Caroline and Hoopman
It did occur to me that it might have been me
Although it could have been me playing good music
And then Steve Ruth
I feel like he would say some dumb shit like that
I'm just trying to center myself
here. Very true.
If you keep going to Fish Pond Lake
and taking x-rated pictures of people.
So there is an
ongoing fucking
saga in the Speak Your Peace pages
about people fucking at Fish Pond.
There is no less than two or three
Speak Your Peace's just this week about it.
Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you.
That's where you do it at.
Well, yeah.
You're just jealous you ain't get, Manny.
I didn't grow up here, so I wouldn't have a 30-year-old
man. I fucked a fish pond at least four times.
Why would I go to a fish pond and fucking have a house?
That's true.
What's him having an affair with
a married man or woman?
We're going to walk out there and catch Terrence going to town on somebody.
A unicorn, Terrence.
Probably a bear.
A bear.
Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you, Tom.
Go ahead.
If you keep going to Fish Pond Lake and taking X-rated pictures of people,
you're going to wind up in prison someplace.
You better cool it and cool it quick, buddy.
Is that happening?
We got a peeping Tom at Fishpond?
A peeping Tom with a camera at Fishpond.
Is there a better name for him than that?
I guess that's just a legit fucking...
If you are taking pictures of people naked against their will, that is a...
I believe that's sexual assault.
I think that's called voyeurism.
Yeah, that's it. I think that will land you on
the sexual offenders list, won't it?
I'll get you five
to seven in most jurisdictions.
I believe it will.
At the very least,
it'll get you a speaker
piece.
When I'm not around to get my mail out of my mailbox,
my next door neighbor gets in my box
and steals my mail out of it. That's a federal gets in my box and steals my mail out of it.
That's a federal offense pal. Have a
nice day crook.
Okay some of these
I just circled because I like I can
hear Tom reading them and I'm like this will be good.
No matter what you say and speak your
face if you follow
it up with pal it's funny. Yeah exactly.
Thank you. God bless. Bye.
That's my favorite. The abrupt thank you god bless bye that's my favorite the abrupt thank
you bye yeah god bless america signing off and what's also funny about that is it's like if
somebody's not stealing your social security check they ain't welcome taking them goddamn bills or
anything else i got in my mailbox okay hold on before you read the next one because
terrence has given me the key
to our Instagram.
Oh yeah.
And I'm gonna put it,
I'm gonna record you
doing it on the Instagram.
Oh yeah,
turn that light off.
There's a live.
How does this work?
Well,
can you turn that lamp on?
I'm trying to get
my incense brick to burn.
Are you sick?
I can,
that lamp doesn't work.
Yeah.
No,
I just like to do it
from Beyonce.
Okay.
Well,
this is very light because...
I can turn the lights up.
You want me to turn the lights up?
Yeah, bring the lights up.
No, this is good.
I don't like too much light.
I look bad.
Perfect.
Oh, God.
You can bring it down a little.
Bring it down.
Bring it down a little.
Yeah, come on.
Will you calm?
Here we go.
Good.
You fucking scab.
Okay.
I'd like to respond to a comment in Speak Your Peace
in which the caller was bashing me over talking about a black car.
If you'd like to know, I am now 77 years old.
My wife died five years ago.
I really do appreciate you sticking your nose in my business
without knowing all the facts.
How do you even know whether I'm talking about the same car and truck?
You don't think there's more than one black car in the state of Kentucky?
You don't think there are more pickups from the state of Virginia that go to the fishpond lake?
I hope you can sleep at night, man.
God bless you.
Oh, fuck. I like that one sleep it not make God bless you Oh fuck I like that one because
I think it was the
Peeping Tom answering
Or at least someone
Who was accused of being a peeping Tom
Was answering and saying look
Okay so in this same
Issue
We got someone being Accused of being a peeping Tom and the accuser Taking that for themselves And saying, look. Okay, so in this same issue,
we got someone being accused of being a peeping Tom and the accuser taking that for themselves.
Yeah.
In the same issue.
Yeah.
And it was funny because he gave a lot of details
about his identity.
He was like, I'm a 75-year-old man.
My wife died five years ago.
I like to jerk off to people fucking in Pitfall and Lake.
I let him have that, really. you think I'm the only black car
yeah like why else
you think I'm the only black car
watching people fuck up here
here's my question
how do you think that you've been
like what makes you
unless you were actually doing it
think that you've been targeted
for taking pictures of people in Fishpond Lake unless you were actually doing it think that you've been targeted for taking pictures of
people at fishpond like unless you were actually doing it yeah like someone calls it i know it's
you yeah right god damn i like this one dot dot dot i know the conservative websites to go to get
the good information about hillary clinton it's even go to get the good information about Hillary Clinton.
It's even hard to believe the FBI anymore.
It's even hard to believe the FBI anymore. It had an ellipses at the beginning of it.
Dot, dot, dot.
Do you think that means they wrote it in?
Yeah.
I guess they had to.
Absolutely.
Wow.
I was sitting here watching a TV station that has a whole lot of honky-tonkers on the TV playing their music.
I don't think that's going to work.
I don't know where that one's getting at.
To a certain person, I think you need to practice what you preach.
That way it doesn't smack you right back in the face when it comes to drunk driving.
I know who that's about.
We got a drunk driving preacher here in the county?
I think so.
Damn. On the loose uh
to the person that had the questions about hillary clinton's emails being compromised
they were and we found not and we would not excuse me they were and we would not have found
out about it if they hadn't been classified believe me hillary clinton's the smartest criminal in the
history of this country her help from mccabe and stirzok is that how you say that yeah the fbi guys
i can't remember which oh yeah yeah i remember those guys they're like in the news yeah they
were the ones that were like texting yeah yeah which brought the fbi down a notch has been some
of the best criminal work I've ever seen.
This is all political bull and hate for Donald Trump.
Sessions is a plant for the Democratic Party
and Rosenstein is his side man.
See ya.
Sessions is a plant for the Dems.
Yeah, Sessions is a plant for the Dems.
Rosenstein is his side man.
See ya.
See ya.
I just like the idea.
Hillary Clinton's the most criminal mastermind
yeah
when lately
the Clintons
are probably
the dumbest criminals
in the history
of this country
okay two things here
let's pause
one is
the other day
I got
y'all know Red
yeah
oh yeah
fucking Red
very much so
he's such a
fucking nut
anyway he came in the other day and michelle you
know it's got like a sleeve of tattoos and he was like what and on her lower forearm or whatever
it's like her great great some grandma and kids or some shit and he was like what is that what is
that on your arm and i couldn't stop myself i said it's just Hillary checking her emails. How did he respond to that?
He just looked at me and Matilda died laughing.
So he was like well I've got to go.
He just took off.
He's a coward once you actually push him on stuff.
Yeah.
He has a big game like he's this big MAGA guy.
Yeah.
And he tries to throw it in your face.
But once you actually fight back a little bit he immediately caves.
Oh yeah.
The other day he said back when you could really tell a joke i said ran you're the joke and he's like well he's like i
gotta go for i have got my dignity and he stormed out that is the most fascinating thing about the
maga psychology it's like they're constantly like challenging people to fight them and so once you
actually stick up for yourself and fight back, they're immediately just like, oh, immediately like you can't tell jokes anymore.
Blah, blah, blah.
Yeah.
You can't even joke anymore.
Also, whoever they were listening to probably wasn't that goddamn funny anyway.
Yeah.
Well, you said two things.
What was the second?
The other thing is, how long before we start playing Good Speak Your Peace?
Yeah, we could do that.
It did occur to me.
And I was like, how would anybody really know?
Did we ever find out who wrote to Tom
and Terrence? Yeah he commented on our
Instagram. Oh really? Yeah he said
so they actually printed it huh?
And I was like are you the one behind this?
I think his name was Andy
shout out to Andy. Yeah shout out to Andy that was pretty
funny. And it was printed three and a
half months ago when he actually sent it in it's just
I didn't get around to posting it on Instagram
until we had an Instagram.
I wish you crazy people
quit trying to save our country from the greatest
present this country's ever had.
Quit trying to save it!
Yeah, crazy people. Quit trying to save
that which doesn't need saved.
I mean, I agree. Let it burn.
That may be all. I don't know, Tom.
Really, I just wanted you to get the one about
the cop.
Do y'all think we could get a hold of the speaker pieces
that don't make the cut?
That don't get to print?
That's what we really need to blow
out this podcast.
Really start making money.
As if we can get to the
Speak Your Pieces of the
Venture County Mount Neagle. That's the pot of gold
on the other end of the rainbow.
Yeah, that's it. If we can get that,
fucking sky's
the limit.
Oh, fuck. I think that's all we got
for this week. Lord have mercy.
Alright, there's one more.
To certain fishermen slash maintenance man.
You need to quit reading
Speak Your Peace and start doing your job.
You also fish worse than a three year old.
That was pretty good. Sick burn dog.
Worse than a three year old.
A good woke
straw man would be
a good woke straw man would be like,
all you...
Let me think about this.
All of you out there who use the word bootlicker
are suspiciously silent when it comes to cobblers
whose whole lives are sacrificed to making boots.
The boots that we all say people lick.
Exactly.
I was in, like, when we were in Lexington this weekend,
I drove past a big, I guess it was a big boot factory,
and it was an H, the company started with an H,
I can't remember what it's called,
but it said, on the side it had a huge picture of a cop on the building it said heroes where hurts or whatever it was i don't fucking
know and i was like uh terrence will love this this is really terrence's shit exactly have you
not y'all know what galls is absolutely huh it's like the first responder supply store. Galls? Galls, G-A-L-L-S.
They've got all like the tactical.
First responder supply store.
That exists.
That you don't even have to be a first responder to buy shit from.
Suffice it to say, they carry a lot of Under Armour.
It ain't even as tight wrapped as the cosmetology stores where you go in and they literally straight up ask for your license.
Really?
Oh, fuck yeah. Oh fuck yeah oh yeah wait wait
wait so you're saying there's more leeway when it comes to buying military absolutely
than buying like nightsticks and billy clubs then it is cosmetics yeah i have been turned
away from cosmetic stores for buying discounted hair dye
Because I'm not a cosmetologist
And they asked for my fucking papers
That's the truth
You know what this is why
You trying to get that mask
Let me see your papers
I mean it's straight up
I mean it's
There's all kinds of weirdness
Around being a fucking hairdresser
Like You have to go to school You literally have to go to school there's all kinds of weirdness around being a fucking hairdresser like
you have to go to school
you literally have to go to school for
like two years and pass
a state board test to cut hair
any dumb dick
bob can cut down any tree
inside
you know what I mean
and it's truly bizarre
that is really weird it's crazy
the things that we regulate in this country is i love when you did that regulate things that we
regulate scare quotes regulate regulate winking with him they call it or so they say damn lexington
was pretty wild me and matt were maybe 50 yards
away from a lightning strike oh yeah and then y'all were extending a puddle of water
i say i think at the same time i think y'all were a little further than that
tom doesn't buy my story okay listen all the tall me if you and me
you have anyone to be calling
anybody out
just let me stop bullshit
I'm the
veracity checker
told more tall tales
the stories alone you have told
us from scuttle hole gap
you have told me that Scuttlehole Gap.
You have told me that a man had a pet bear that sat and watched TV with him.
You swear?
I've been telling you.
Hold on a second. Not a panther.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Not a panther lived under a man's trailer.
No, I said a guy said that, and that and that was bullshit yeah walk it back now sexton
hold on a second i'm gonna prove y'all the bear story though sexton in the afternoon ain't so
fucking hot busy hold on a second hold on a second y'all getting ready to eat all kinds of crow
matthew hey i need you to verify one thing for me, because my buddies think I'm lying.
Alright.
Does Roger Urie not have a goddamn bear as a pet?
Yeah.
He's eight and a half years old.
Tell them about it.
I got you on speaker.
He comes up there all the time.
I mean, they feed him in the nighttime.
He was at a coal mine. He was a there all the time. I mean, they feed him every night time.
He was at a coal mine.
He was a cub, and he was at a coal mine.
And the bear just kept coming around, kept coming around.
And then eventually, like, it was a cub, so they couldn't leave it at night.
Nobody else would feed it, so he just took it up out of his house.
And he goes up on top of the mountain, sleeps, and does whatever he does.
And then he comes back down there when he's hungry.
They feed it. It's come up my house two or three times, apart from does whatever it does. And then it comes back down there when it's hungry. They feed it.
It's come up my house two or three times.
I've heard where the dog, where we live at.
Hey, now tell me this.
Has he not walked that motherfucker like a dog upside the road?
Yeah, yeah.
We put a leash on it and walked it.
I mean, it ain't that big.
It's about 250 pounds.
I swear.
It's that big.
That's all I needed, pal.
I see you'll sell you.
Fuck you.
God damn it.
This photo, friend.
Look, I'm not calling Matt to verify.
All right, I don't need that.
I don't need...
Oh, fuck.
I didn't want that big by 250 pounds.
Yeah, he goes up on the mountain and sleeps or whatever he does.
Just a night time. He has somewhere to go. yeah he goes he goes up on the mountain and sleeps or whatever he does if you're
feeding a bear like you're just feeding cats god damn he just comes up so walk I don't know. So walk it around so Tom can make a point on the podcast.
It's come up to my house turn three times.
I hope that recorded cleanly.
It did.
I could hear it in my voice.
Oh, my God.
That's good podcast.
We really do need to start phoning a friend more.
Like when my sister called in the mail.
That didn't end up being great.
That was all right.
Did that make the cut? It did. I put that that one on patreon so i included every we made a lot
of dry snitches in that out in that episode so i was like let's just put that on page
um that way if the cops want to get out and they have to pay five dollars a month
we'll take your money now you uh were in the process of calling out terrence
for lying about no no no no i wasn't saying he was lying i just think that maybe that water tower
was a little further away 50 yards it was right across the street from the borough and we were
right at the borough i mean how much is how wide is the street it's probably closer than 50 yards
what's your what's your account?
It struck the water tower.
No, I don't know that.
No, it did.
It flicked it like a nipple.
The electricity did go out in the burrow because of the lightning. The lightning was intense.
This is what I get for hanging out with drunks because the only people who saw this were fucked up.
That's true.
I don't know, man.
And Matt literally, he told me that as soon as he was like with a few people, it wasn't just you all, some other people.
It was me and Russ and Matt.
Yeah.
Is it?
Matt said that as soon as it happened, he tried to run run in the building then he quickly noticed no one
else was moving and he had to like stay in there and stand his grail we all jumped in did that and
sort of huddled into each other all three of us just sort of like huddled around each other and
then we're like oh that was weird man um um all right we're at 50 minutes um is this our 69th episode and we're not gonna mention it
no that's i think it's even funnier if we i think it's funnier if we don't mention it at all
everybody's expecting you know oh well um this is our 69th episode um there is one thing i want
to talk about this is a missed opportunity one semi- is one thing I want to talk about.
This is a missed opportunity.
One semi-serious thing I want to talk about.
Not that serious.
On our 69th episode.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's, you know, every episode's got to have its yin and yang.
Majority, you know, just irreverent humor and then relatively serious shit no the only thing i wanted
to talk about this is the only point i wanted to make tom posted about it earlier today a little
bit but did you notice how did you notice um okay let me see how to frame this you know how they had
the sore thing last month at the very end of the month yeah
did you notice how hal rogers announced that they had gotten four and a half million dollars
for the prison like for the water lines for the prison i didn't see how he did it
but i saw that like uh yeah i got i got the memo check this shit out You could maybe make the argument that all three of us sitting here were somewhat complicit in receiving that money for those water lines. work for advocated for and even facilitated brought into existence the pilot program or
whatever that he's that he drew this money from which we said all along well it's funny yes
exactly it's funny because me and tom yes all three of us we'd said this forever that it was
a trap that we were walking right into a trap you can can't fucking work with your enemies. You can't.
You absolutely cannot.
But a lot of people are not walking away with that conclusion.
What's the conclusion?
That you can't work with your enemies.
Double down, keep it going.
Double down, like we were saying earlier, just deny.
Deny, deny, deny.
Well, if you think about it, it's just the liberal way.
Yeah.
I've been trying to think of a way to phrase this, and I don't think it's anything groundbreaking that's not been said before.
But when I was a liberal, one thing I loved.
Because it's testimonials when I was a liberal.
One thing I loved was the sort of Magneto Professor X juxtaposition.
Like, you know, best friends with completely opposite worldviews that actually try to destroy each other fairly often.
But then get together to play chess, you know, and shit like that.
Liberals love that fantasy.
They do.
Let's call it the Magneto Professor X fantasy.
Magneto Professor X. To apply it to real life the john mccain brock obama thing to them compromises virtue yeah
or the john mccain joe biden friendship yeah i was complaining about my facebook one time to
one of these people i was like oh it's just any anytime anything happens any fucking headline
that you know it's trending it's just a beret of bullshit just every
possible hot take you can think is on my facebook and she was like that's because you're a connector
you're the you're the nexus of all the various um ideas that's that's that's a malcolm gladwell
thing right that needs that there's like connectors there's like three three archetypes of people and apparently tanya's a connector i forget what the
other two are now yeah i just looked at her like connectors disruptors and bootlickers
probably that sounds right although there is a great deal of booleaking that is a part of connecting actually.
That's all it is in fact. That's really all
liberalism is.
Booleaking 101.
Let's make this a segment. When I was a liberal
Well okay so the reason that's actually a good segue
because when I was a liberal I was
literally one of the people who advocated
for this. I don't know if you remember this
I wrote an article in 2013 that specifically,
at Mimi's insistence,
but specifically,
yeah,
she literally almost made me do this,
but specifically was like,
you've got two and a half billion dollars in this abandoned mine lines fund
that is created out of every ton of coal that's mined in the US,
80 cents or whatever goes into this fund
you got two and a half billion dollars no one's doing anything with it what if you use the money
for like economic transition in the coal fields that's actually what's happening right now it's
just being used for prisons but not the kind we want prisons and inner blue we dug our own grave
so yeah well we did you're we did but it was what's sad it was i was a liberal
and could did not see that that was the saddest part of this did you finish what you were saying
tom about magneto i forgot when you were a liberal i forgot what i was going with that
no you finished it you were saying i was just pointing out that liberals love this fantasy of being able to agree to disagree with people that even vehemently disagree with you.
And for you to just have a beer afterward or whatever.
Essentially coat switch.
Yeah.
Something similar to that. The real fucking tragedy here is that he got more money allocated for that fucking water plant than Martin County got.
For, yeah, they could use an entire new water system in Martin County.
There's more money for water to a hypothetical prison.
That's the thing, though.
And 100 people.
100 people will be hooked up.
100.
Yeah, 100.
In Roxanna.
100 homes plus the 1,200-bed prison.
And nobody stops.
And we've been beaten down to the point where nobody stops and asks,
why the fuck don't those 100 people have access to water?
Well, not to mention, isn't it like a big...
When Rogers came to... Anyway, to finish the thought,
it's Martin County, every single person in Martin County has shit water.
Right.
Yeah.
Every single person.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Thousands of people.
Yeah.
And there's actually a federal prison there, but they get that water from Prestonsburg,
which is a really fascinating story that somebody should look into.
Yeah, the Martin County water is not even fit for that process.
Yeah, yeah.
But to me...
I had another thought lost. Go ahead.
No, you go ahead. What were you going to say?
Walk it out.
Yeah, walk it out, Tom.
Walk it out.
To me, the whole thing just kind of like...
To me, it's a perfect example of the sort of like, not just the limitations, but this like the profound error at the heart of thinking that like,
of thinking that you can have any kind of sort of redistributive program in a capitalist system.
And furthermore, that you can use nonprofits as a vehicle for achieving that.
So, for example, the only reason I say that is because
the creation of this AML fund program that Hal Rogers used for this,
the only reason anybody was advocating for it
was it wasn't like working people were advocating.
It was people like me.
It was like the professional managerial bourgeois.
You know what I mean?
People funded by grants and stuff.
This is entirely a grant-funded campaign
and grant-funded advocacy work.
And it just goes to show you that
that's not the way to actually see change.
I don't know.
To me, this is a perfect...
It's a good example of that.
I'm probably not articulating it well, but do you kind of see what I'm...
Yeah, I got you.
I got you.
What I was getting at is that word on the street, which I feel like is something Tom would say,
is that when Hal came to town To announce
The record of decision
He was furious
Or rod
When Hal
Came to hand down
The rod
He was furious
With our judge executive
Supposedly because
He had already squandered
Two mil for this had already squandered two mil
for this same project.
Squandered. Gone.
What is the word? Two million?
Just down the drain.
No accounting for it.
I have no idea where it went.
Two million that he had
sent him for this very
get to fucking deal
with the water situation well you know what
prison i i said this you know a lot of us have said this if it doesn't wind up getting built
it will be because of the own ineptitude of our of our county government which is hilariously ironic
that they fought so hard to get it here and then and then they're fumbling and all the step with
every step of the way yeah so what i love is that your uh repercussions for losing two million dollars is to receive 5.4
million dollars that's what that's that's what happens to men in power democrats no less
in this county yep yeah no no, it's pretty dark.
But I don't know.
I just thought that there was kind of a really weird irony in that,
in the sense that those of us who don't want to see a prison built
are also kind of.
Terrence, don't you know you're damned if you do
and you're damned if you don't?
Yeah, no.
That is my daily mantra at my job right now.
If I do it, I'm fucked. If I do it, I'm fucked.
If I don't, I'm fucked.
That's the exact situation I am.
A big chunk of my job is to advocate for these policies
that are feeding right into the prison.
I'm having a serious breakdown about it because
I've got to have money.
But ultimately...
That's not... I I mean I don't know
it's really hard for
to articulate it
but this kind of goes back to our episode about the
grit grift and about just how
like there's only a handful of types
of non-profits and
like the main
type of non-profit that advocates for this
kind of like solution
to these problems
is
predicated on the notion
you're not actually
subverting power.
You're not actually challenging power.
You're just trying to plug people into specific issues
and get them to write their senator
or their congressperson or get them to go to the
Capitol building or something. Which is the most
which accomplishes nothing. Facilees facile well i'm at least totally out of the lobbying game that feels good
yeah you remember tanya we used to go to the capitol and go with our hats in our hands to
talk to fucking lawmakers and we would just walk out afterwards like that was pointless
oh but everybody but what happens at those things is we all walk out and celebrate our progress
i almost i went home and cried every time i ever went to the capitol i shout i felt like a piece
of dog shit and that is by design that's how they want you to feel that's how legislators want you
to feel if you come and deal with them they don't want you to feel fucking good about it
no they didn't want to see your ass they want you to feel dirty i hated it and i literally
i remember one of my earliest KFTC fucking staff meetings.
I don't know.
I said something like, I'm just not really interested in lobbying as a tactic.
And like eight people looked at me and basically in unison said, you're in the wrong job.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, it's a cult, man.
It reminds me of the same shit.
Like when I was a kid and I was like, surely I don't believe the Bible's literal.
Right.
And everybody was like, you're in the wrong place i mean i bought into it more after that but that
was in my early i was i was pretty i was i was pretty punk when i got that job and then i kind
of like i was like okay i see i get it i get it is there a coconut in there uh is there a salted
caramel dig me out of salted caramel i saw that on the list um but when i said you're damned if you're doing you're damned if you don't because
i actually am into some things that i'm doing at work or that i'm at least seeing happen at work
at my job right now but everything i do even if it is i know deep down it's good people complain
about it like the people i work with it's just it's just one of those job it's just one of those
work environments no matter what you're damn if you do you never if i didn't do it
people complain right then when i do it they still complain it doesn't matter right i'm creating
stuff out of nothing left and right and people are like right it's just because i work with a
lot of miserable people i mean i think a lot of people can relate to that oh yeah we're all
miserable here.
I don't necessarily feel miserable,
but I do feel like I'm... You can only feel so miserable, us,
on a socialist podcast,
sitting around eating macaroons.
Yeah, I'm pretty good.
I feel good.
Which one's salted caramel?
There's like a key on the back of the box.
The treat of the French colonial empire.
Pistachio.
Oh, God, that sounds terrible.
Yeah. colonial empire pistachio god that sounds terrible um yeah well um so yeah yeah that's that's that's that uh fuck i've been sitting on your conscience well no not really i mean yeah i mean everything
you do is um you know to a certain degree you're sort of culpable for things and you know you eat
shit and you correct course and you try to be transparent about it and be like i'm learning
figuring it out but i ate some shit but well i guess what really bugs me about it is that like
i i came i figured this out a few years ago this isn't like i've realized this yesterday and was
like oh shit i realized it a few years ago and ago and me and all three of us have been trying to tell people
involved in these campaigns and stuff
like, look, it's a trap.
They're just inviting you into the room
to talk about.
QFED, Admiral.
It's a trap.
They're just inviting you into the room
so they can get progressive cover
for these things.
And as soon as it's feasible, possible.
You think you're telling them
and influencing them.
But the interesting thing is,
is the only way,
I hate to use words like effect change,
I'm still trying to work that shit out in my vocabulary,
but it's something we talk about all the time is,
you can't like come to power with suggestion.
You have to confront it. you have to confront it you have to tell them you have to
oppose their policies at every turn and everything they're about and even when you think they're
right or within a range of right you can't rehabilitate them yeah you you can't you're right
um i will say this so i just don't necessarily feel like I've got it figured out either
you know I feel like I'm in a constant state of just like
you're right bizarro I mean we are in a
circus we're still learning but we do know there are
examples throughout history of things that have worked and the thing is
is that again I feel like we've been sort of
beating this horse to death but like
i'm always fucking up idioms beating this horse to death beating the dead horse i'm into it man
beating the dead horse the crown's heavy on the head it's my favorite idea i thought that was it
heavy is the crown look no the thing is though is I feel like we've been sort of beating this horse to death for years.
It is just that, like, we know some things that do work.
Organizing workplaces, shutting down prisons, shutting down least broaden the political horizon of things that are possible.
I agree.
And that's not going to occur if your only theory of change is going to people like Hal Rogers and being like, again, like me a few years ago.
This is what you got to do.
These are really wonky solutions. rogers in being like again like me a few years ago this is what you gotta do these are like
really wonky solutions and the blood no the what's gonna wind up happening is he's gonna get four and
a half million dollars and build prison and meanwhile it's couched in like well this is what
these all these groups asked for exactly and the people spoke and they said they were water yeah
yeah or yeah now it's it's yeah i'll try to put it down in
words or something it's i mean honestly though it's like we to me this feels like the example
of smackra and i mean you know nothing's more boring than smack our history but i mean tom's
covered it on a few episodes surface mine reclamation law right is that jim tom always says jimmy carter in the rose garden
i was there with i was there with jimmy card in the rose garden when he signed smack like all
those old activists always say that oh yeah i've got one in particular in my head who never shuts
the fuck up about it and just complains constantly about every literally every other thing happening
anywhere in the world the distance from her to the bathroom anything
whatever and just it's just like tons of activists created that legislation thinking that they knew
better than whoever was actually i don't know whatever and they created because they were so self-centered in their ability to tell coal companies what's what.
Yeah.
They created a fucking law that hinged almost entirely on fucking broke down citizen fucking Toms and Joes.
Right.
To be like, here's where you're fucking up.
And it just resulted in mountain type removal.
Yeah. Yeah. It made things worse removal yeah yeah yeah it made things worse yeah just make things worse there's now there's less oversight by actual government right uh anyone who knows what the fuck they're talking about and more
oversight by jack and jill up the hill you know whose whales went dry fetching their pail of
orange water yeah literally it literally. It's like,
because they wanted more citizen participation.
Right.
Because they felt like
they were locked out of a process.
Well, they got what they wanted.
Right.
Yeah, that's a good analogy.
That's a good analogy.
Anyway.
Well, also activists
in that more liberal sphere,
which we've all occupied
at some point or another,
or still do,
also need to know that
there are whims that sound good from a policy
standpoint and that pad their their resumes out aren't necessarily compatible with what people
actually want in the communities here is that yeah but the problem here is across human existence
we do not learn from our mistakes and even worse or what's even would be
more even better is if we learned from other people's mistakes you know who does though
computers and this is why the age-old fucking mantra from mammy
white did you make that up no west virginia mammy white
from the wild and wonderful watts is that computers as drugs is taking over the world
that's that's the end of it so you're saying we need computer activists who will learn from their
mistakes we need those self-driving cars
in pittsburgh to organize become sentient and then organize yes that comes self-aware
what i'm saying i think we can organize ai um it could be done it can be done i think so
hell i resized a large document today. Felt like a fucking king.
To smaller? Did you make it
smaller? Did you shrink it? Yeah.
Nice.
Oh, God.
Well, so yeah, we got
an hour and ten. I gotta pee. Yeah, we probably
need to close this down. We're really not
gonna make any 69 jokes.
This is the
68.5 episode.
Okay, thank God.
68.5.
Before we leave...
If you want to go pee,
I just want to get Tom's take real quick on the
headline, the most
insane headline I saw this week.
Serena Williams' meltdown
is a sign that tennis lies at a crossroads.
Wow.
A meltdown?
So what crossroads?
This was in The Guardian.
Tennis is an old rich kid's sport.
There's no
crossroads.
I thought it was absurd.
So for those that are interested, Serena
Williams, I mean it's been in the headlines a lot,
played Japanese player named Naomi Osaka this weekend.
Naomi Osaka beat her.
Serena, not happy with the umpire, said some things to the umpire.
And the thing about it all is that Serena's not debating that, that you know maybe yelling at an umpire is not
the best thing but the just pointing out that the men do it all the time like and i mean there's
several players on the men's side nick curios called the same umpire son of a bitch and a
fucker and all this stuff right novak jokovic the same umpire not even like other umpires like the same guy like all the best men's players have like reamed this guy
and nothing happened but when serena did it like she was docked points and all this kind of stuff
and she didn't call him any names did she no she just said that she wanted you know he owed her an
apology owed her an apology saying that she was getting coached. And it's like,
whether she was or not,
like, who gives a fuck?
Like, tennis is the only game
where you get penalized
for coaching your players.
Yeah, I don't even get it.
Yeah, that's dumb.
Well, that's
Tom's tennis take.
We need some cool
Nothing else there.
It's just a sexist
double standard.
Nothing else to decode.
What is it?
One other thing I will add about that, though, is, you know, the Ben Garrison guy?
Yeah.
Like, that does all the racist cartoons or whatever.
Yeah.
Well, there's, his Australian counterpart is this guy, I think, named Mark Knight that
did a, uh.
I saw that.
A cartoon about Serena that, you know, projected her, like, having this her having this kind of big meltdown or whatever.
And in the background, the umpire's saying to a blonde woman,
tennis player that Serena's playing,
could you just let her win already?
And it's racist for two reasons.
One, because of the depiction of Serena,
but two, because Serena wasn't playing a blonde white woman.
She was playing a half Haitian, half Japanese
player on the other side, another black woman.
Who we brought up last
week, or two weeks ago. It's really funny
because when I signed up for the
Instagram, I went through all the people
Tom follows. I was like,
I've got to get inside the mind of Tom Sexton.
Oh my god.
And we went, and I was going down the list of
tennis players that Tom follows.
Naomi Osaka was one of them.
And now, when people were talking about it this week, I was like, I know who that is.
So anyway.
Tom's tennis.
I'm going to go ahead and say we don't make this a regular segment.
Just nix this one.
All right. This one doesn't have legs,
but this was by request.
All right, so...
What was I going to say?
Go to our Patreon.
I've said it every single episode
the last few weeks,
but seriously,
we have weekly episodes
at our Patreon,
P-A-T-R-E-O-N dot com
slash Trill Billy Workers Party.
We got some shout outs this week.
We got new subscribers.
When I call their names out,
I need y'all to do the dance hall sirens
and then like...
Yeah.
Shout out to Nick.
Shout out to Nick.
Shout out to Vargas Prime. Shout out to Vargas Prime.
Shout out to Vargas Prime.
Shout out to...
You.
You?
Soldier Boy?
You, you, you.
Is Soldier Boy a patron of yours?
Very possible.
Shout out to you.
Hold on.
You don't have to put your real name on Patreon?
No, you don't have to, I don't think.
Are these iTunes subscribers or something?
No, these are Patreon subscribers.
People who pay us money.
And you can do it too at Patreon.com.
That sound is in the title.
It's in the URL.
It's Patreon.com.
It's really not. It it's patreon.com slash true bill it's really not it's just patreon.com slash true billy workers party shout out to taylor kessner shout out to taylor shout out to zach
shout out to zach shout out to gar beard shout out to gar beard it sounds like your cousin who has a beard his name is garth uh shout out to promise 369 hell yeah i liked
promise uh shout out to jacob weiss shout out to jacob uh shout out to nick ray shells maybe i'm
not saying that right but nick ray shells where i'm hoping to get to a point where we get so many
we can't even list them off anymore that'd be great shout out to snout because
shout out to june barber i gotta piss i'm so i gotta pee so bad too
shout out to ollie cleveland shout out to ollie shout out say shout out every time just
uh hayley forester hey oh god damn it these people are giving us money. Y'all being assholes.
Shout out to Kai Foster.
Shout out to Michael Thorpe.
Shout out to Lucy Ellis.
We need the sound of a car driving by real fast.
Shout out to Tony.
No, we need the sound of a basketball falling through the net.
Or a golf ball falling into a golf cup.
Shout out to David Gehring, Michael Ditto, Lauren.
Thank you.
Shout out.
Occult Boyfriend.
Shout out to the Occult Boyfriend.
We've all had a few of those.
Eric Phillips, Stephanie Molden, Cosby Hayes,
Jakob Knudsen,
Nathan Gilbert.
Thank you.
Richard Fuck.
Thanks, Richard Fuck.
Yeah, especially you, Richard Fuck.
By the way, the episode...
Dick Fuck.
Ha!
Dick Fuck, yeah.
She got it.
I think that's the thing.
Anna Guerrero Crane.
Katie Blake.
Fingerless Rebecca Jenkins.
Not Fingerless Rebecca Jenkins.
Yeah, this is actually kind of fun.
Sign up for Patreon with the most creative name you can think of
because we'll read it and it'll be funny.
Zach Patterson.
Thank you.
Alexander Kim.
RH.
Kenneth Poteet. Annie. I think that probably catches this up Kenneth Poteet
Annie
I think that probably catches this up
Poteet sounds familiar
And India
Lahaze
Yeah shout out India
Gracias
Long time listener
Hey
And I think that catches up because
I think we read off these other folks
Thank you
Yeah
Sign up because this weekend
We should have a pretty good episode
With Katie Slinger
Hopefully we can
We'll get that out
And shout out to the people
Who recognized me in public
This weekend as a smutty podcast host
You made me feel like
Alice Pizzecki
Who's Alice Pizzecki?
You two losers
We'll see what comes out on Twitter.
Who knows who Alice is. And you made me feel like
her for a brief fleeting moment.
And I really appreciate it. It was great to meet you guys.
Even though it was a little uncomfortable for me.
It's fine. God damn it.
Yeah, thank you for that.
Thanks for coming out to the Slut Pill Show.
There's a Slut Pill Show in Charleston tomorrow
night as well.
Charleston, West Virginia. Stand down. I have been guilted well. Charleston, West Virginia, stand up.
I have been guilted by my Charleston, West Virginia friends,
and I think I am going to have to go.
I have to figure out some dog care.
Well, there would be a good band there.
I think Long Hots is their name.
Sounds right.
And Slut Pill will be playing.
Slut Pill.
Starts at.
Shit, I'm so bad.
Starts at 7.
I can't just. It's at the makespace
Smash
I wasn't prepared
With the name of the place
We'll just put it on something
Alright good talking to you guys I gotta pee
Alright we'll talk to you later
See ya