Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 410- Falling for Christmas (2022)

Episode Date: January 2, 2023

In this week's episode, we've got the much-anticipated annual romcom episode with the Lindsay Lohan/Chord Overstreet holiday vehicle "Falling for Christmas." Fantastic. Special topics for your consideration include: rich ski people, the utter delight that is Lindsay Lohan, the utterly unbelievable name that is CHord Overstreet, the concept of a 'flapjack daddy,' a few *small teeny tiny* plot holes in this otherwise-perfectly conceived and masterfully written film, and another much-anticipated event: another voicemail from Claudia. Wanna hear our other romcom episodes? They are Episode 209- "Love Actually," Episode 261- "You've Got Mail," and Episode 361- "Miss Congeniality," but we also once went absolutely insane while in lockdown and spent the better part of three hours over two episodes discussing "Titanic." Those were Bonus Episodes #3 & 4 in April and May of 2020. What a time to have been alive. Hey, be more like Claudia and leave us a voicemail! You can call 412-407-7025 and let us hear your sweet sweet voices. Otherwise, find us online: Support us at patreon.com/werewolfambulance where you can hear us discuss an action movie each month. It's Christmas and I want Allen to be happy, so it's his pick this month. IT'S JOHN WICK, BAY-BEE! Buy merch for yourself or those you love at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance on Reddit at r/werewolfambulance on Facebook at facebook.com/werewolfambulance on Twitter @werebulance on Instagram @werewolfambulance. [e-mail] If you liked this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen! It helps others find us and allows us to continue to grow. Intro song is by Alex Van Luvie Outro song is A. Wallis- "EMT" Seriously, we have the best listeners, hands down.

Alan. Chord. I mean, Codd. I mean, Codd. It's me, Chord. I mean, Katie. It's me, Chord over Street. I look like a bunco young Brad Pitt who just got his wisdom teeth out.

How long has it been since you watched this movie? We're going to go about two weeks, Katie. Yeah, about two weeks for me, too. So sorry we missed last week's episode. We apologize for nothing. Yeah, I'm not sorry. I just felt I should acknowledge it. So this is me acknowledging it.

Katie, saying I love you to the fans means never having to say I'm sorry to them. That's fair. That makes sense to me. That attracts, right? Yeah, that sounds like a healthy relationship. Yeah. Well, they're, I give and I give and I give here. You know what I'm saying?

I love when we have these arguments as if people are pushing back on us but every time we're like hey we're gonna take a week they're like yeah a hundred percent go have fun yeah but you know there's people who are not commenting who are like these lazy sons of bitches they don't feel grateful and those people can go pound salt do it you won't how was your Christmas? It was chill I didn't exchange gifts with anyone, so it was really low-key. Yeah. And I watched a bunch of TV and ate a lot of chocolate. It was pretty dope. How about you? It was terrible. My child was sick. Then my husband was sick, and then I was sick. But fortunately, my family is very close by us, so they dropped off all of her presents

so that she had stuff to do. And also a bunch of shellfish. And my cousin-in-law makes this, my cousin-in-law, Justin makes this homemade eggnog that I'm obsessed with. And so he just sent me a whole jar of it. So that really, that kept me in check for a few days. Does it have a weekend water in it or is it just, just tank dog? Oh no, it's rum and brandy and...

Okay. Weekend water. I'll tell you what, Alan, I'm a weekend warrior every day. Katie? Yeah. I say cheers to you. What you drinking? Oh this would be a West Coast IPA. Oh, craft beer. Ask me what I'm drinking. Wine? Wine. Jesus juice. But yeah, but it's like a $5 bottle that's been open for a week. And that's kind of where my holiday season is. Also, in case you can't tell we're in two separate places because Alan doesn't want my typhoid Mary child infecting him before he goes to see his mother-in-law this weekend. I just don't want to be in that puke feedback loop that you guys got going on.

Yeah, it's pretty gross. I'm over it, obviously, I wouldn't be drinking corked wine. I will say that I have missed you terribly and I cannot wait for you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the to the to to the to the to to to to to the to the to the the to the the the the the the the the their their their their their theirfoing their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. I'm their. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tief. I'm tief. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. Ic. I'm tief. Ia. Ia. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm tief. I'm. I'm tief. I'm tief. I'm tief. I'm thea. I'm tthat I have missed you terribly and look forward to be back at the same room with you. Missed you terribly and I cannot wait for you to open Rob's Christmas present to you. So good. But Katie, that's not what we're here to talk about this week. No, we're here to do our New Year's Romcom tradition. Mm-hmm. Falling for Christmas. The Lindsay Lohan Netflix original. I thought you were gonna say the Lindsay Lohan story. The Lindsay Lohan story. Rated PG for fear, as Netflix told me, what? Fear that this may come true.

I don't even know. What could you possibly be afraid of in this movie? The rich? The rich? Having to get your wisdom to teeth out as an adult? I was sure that he thoen. thoen, I thoen, I th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, I thi, I th. th. th. th. the, I the, I'm the, I the, I'm, th. th. th. th. th. th. I, th. th. th. th. R, th. R, th. R, th. R, th. R, th. I, th. I, th get your wisdom teeth out as an adult? I was sure that he had mumps. He looks, I mean he's a good looking guy, very classically. The sides of his face are not right.

He looks like a chitmunk cheeks. He looks like a churble. Yeah. If at some point he had just like, spit a bunch of walnuts into his mouth, I'm sorry, I was hoarding for winter. It's very cold here in Summit Springs or wherever the fuck they are. Anyway. I have a, before we get started, weren't Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton once chums?

They were chums and then they were enemies and now they're cool again. They've buried the hatchet. Do you think Paris Hilton is going to be cool with Lindsay Lohan's basically doing a Paris Hilton impersonation for this film? Yes, because I think Paris Hilton can laugh at herself. I know I'm always defending Paris Hilton for reasons unknown, but I think she would think this is funny. Okay, okay, all right, all right. Because, I think because when Lindsay Lohan is a rich girl, she's not terrible, she's not like mean or like, she doesn't treat people badly,

she's just like a frivolous rich girl. Yeah, no, she wasn't one of the mean girls. No. This movie opens with her waking up in a bed with like a fancy lady sleep mask and her just tits to the chin. And I have to say that this is the most alive we've seen Lindsay Lohan in a long time. Did you hear the tiddy bill? I didn't. I saw you move off screen but I didn't hear it because of course I was flapping my gums. I cannot hear that.

I can see you doing it, but I can't hear it. That's so weird. Do it again. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. The fans are going to love it. too high-pitched for me to hear? Maybe. Weird. You've lost that range. Fuck!

In the last like two weeks. Yeah, I mean, like, yeah, boobs. Pretty cool. Yeah, her boobs are pretty cool. Pretty cool. There's that animated gift of her squeezing her boobs together and winking, which is one of my favorite things. Oh, I've never seen it. I'll look at it soon. Yeah. So yeah, she's waking up. She's got a electronic curtain opener remote control. Yeah. That comes back later in the movie. With like a Netflix being like, we're Netflix. And you're like, yes, I I know I'm watching this on Netflix. We could get to what yeah we'll get to that later it's a Netflix. Yeah.

So her bevy of assistance come in one of which is her real life sister Ali Lohan. Oh okay okay. Yeah. And she's doing this thing where she's talking on the phone and someone's holding a glass of champagne and she like kind of pantomimes for the person to pour it into her mouth. And that is exactly why I love her. Just that little thing there. I just like that is what I love about Lindsay Lohan. It's expertly done and I thought it's, I that. the side. You're like, that bitch wants to champagne.

I'm gonna keep talking on the phone, pour that in my mouth. Yes. I don't know. And then we meet Chored Overstreet. Lord have mercy. How do we meet Chored Overstreet? I don't know. It's been two weeks since I watch this movie. Don't ask me any specific questions. Okay, we meet Chord Over... I'm sorry, I'm looking up that animated gift right now. Oh, great, thank you. I'm gonna email it to, or text it to you. We meet Short Over Street while he is skiing downhill with Lindsay Lohan's father, aka a general hospital star Jack Wagner. Oh, do you know him?

I know him from when I was a kid. Oh, hold on here, I'm looking at the gift. Oh, this is baby, Lindsay. Yeah. Oh, wow, great tits. Well, what are you gonna do? What are you gonna do? What are you? What are you going to do? What are you going to do? What are you going to do? Well, what are you going to do?

I just kind of felt like, oh man, I'm an old lady now. I was like, well, I'm 40 almost, you know. Anyway. Jack Wagner, General Hospital, yes. So I thought he was going to be a bad guy because like the perfect way to make a character seem like a rich bad guy is to make them really good at skiing downhill fast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But as it turns out there are literally no bad guys on this movie.

It's funny because the opening, after she gets up and her posse of people who are making her look beautiful. There's that montage of like rich D-bags getting out of cars, like getting out of like Bougaties, I suppose. I don't know what a Bougat. I wouldn't know what I would know. I swear to Christ it sounds like something that someone would order at an Italian deli. Mmm, a pound of Bougadi. Put it with your cap of gold.

You gotta get the big Bugatti. They have the best Bougatty. Yeah, you're right about that. So, and so it's like, but like, you know, it just looks like Dick bag after dick bag getting out of a car, and you're like, oh yeah, rich people suck. And the rest of the movie is like, th they? Yeah, they also have hearts of gold. Because Jack Wagner and Chord Over Street,

which also Missy thought his name was Chord. It looks like fucking Chord. I'm sorry, if you're not thinking that he's going to be musically themed, you think his name is Chord. It's like Chad or Chet or... Chard. Do you mean Shad and Shet? Yes. It's not Cad or Ket. So they get into a skiing competition because he wants to talk to Jack Wagner about buying

his resort. And Jack Wagner's like, if you beat me down the hill, you can talk to me. But he doesn't. He throws the race. Because Chorderva Street like got mad ops on those moguls. Yeah. But then the guy talked, then Jack Wagner talks to him anyway. Because he loves him for letting him win. And then it's like, fuck you. I don't care about your resort. But in a really nice way. Yeah, he he he he he he he says, fuck you. Yeah, that's how you say. That's called a compliment sandwich. It's hot chocolate, fuck you. Take your hot chocolate to go. Here's a lid.

And then he says to his assistant, give him a hot chocolate and whatever he wants for the day. There's like, dude, go bananas. Hand jobs for the next 12 hours. Rub it to its raw. Well, we were going at two different directions because I was just going to get banana splits as much as I could do. Yeah, and when I'm thinking about it now, I'm really probably going to get crab legs. It's probably going to be crab legs. Listen, I'm going to need a banana split. It's going to have to have crab legs. the table legs o' open. I want a savory banana split, which is a crab leg split open, covered in butter, and

then more butter, and maybe some scallions. And hot fudge, oddly enough. I'm going to dip it in the hot fudge. I'm not an animal. I'm going to need a hot fudge fountain to go with my crab legs. Well, I can tell you, you can probably do that at a golden corralet in Monroeville. Somebody has shut off the podcast as not to vomit. Yeah. Well...

Happy New Year. I'm sorry, you need to have an iron stomach to roll with us. So after he gets refused by Jack Wagner. Does he have a name in this movie? Um, dad. So after he gets refused by Jack Wagner. What, does he have a name in this movie? Um, dad. Oh, I'm sorry. After he's refused by Beauregard Belmont.

Mmm, that's pretty good. It also sounds like my rich lawyer character. Yes, Beauregard. Yeah, Anna, it's with me, Beauregog Belmont. Beaumont. Yeah. Of the Biloxi Beaumont. Good, good with Biloxi.

Someone in Biloxi right now is like, yes! I'm obscene. It's more than just that Matthew Broderick film. I don't even know what that is. A Biloxi blues? No. No. I try to avoid Matthew Broderick where I can. What?

I like war games and that's about it. Okay. What about Project X? You look at him and you're like, he's unhappy. He always looks like you just watch someone club a seal, you know? He did murder somebody on a highway or on a back road in Scotland or something. Did he? Yeah, he may or may not have been drunk driving and killed somebody.

Don't fucking drive drunk. Yeah. No. No. Especially not in your non-traditional driving position. Right, imagine. I'd be terrified to drive on the other side of the road, sober. When I went to England we were going to rent a car and it got to be the day of and I was like I can't do it. No. I was watching people turn from the wrong side of the road and I was like, no my brain won't do it. Yeah, that's it. I could drive straight, but thinking about having to to to to to the to the to to th. Thinking, to to th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, th, th, their, their th, th, th, th, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their, when, when, when, when, when, when, when their their their their th, when th. th. the, the. to, to. try try to. try to. try to. try to try to. try the the the thro. to me. Yeah. I barely yield to turn left because I'm from Pittsburgh. Because you're from Pittsburgh. Because you're from Pittsburgh. So Lohan and her dad are having this like tender moment about her dead mom

where she's like I remember her perfume and her laugh and how she used to brush my hair and we find out that she died when Lohan is five. It's like no five-year-old fondly remembers getting their hair brushed because I can tell you having a five-year-old if they're screaming like a banshee, they're kicking you, you know? But don't forget that she and Churred have their meat cute. Oh, do they? Yeah, he, that, that, that, that, th and she, th and she, th and she,? Where she, yeah, he bumps into her and spills hot chocolate on her

Valiaga? The leg, whatever the designer shirt she's wearing is or whatever. Right. And I was like, when they meet up later and like, neither of them remember meeting each other, including the one who doesn't have amnesia. I went, I went and re-watch the scene and they never look to to to to to to look to look look look look look look look look look to look to look to look to look to look to look the the the the the the the their their their their their their their chocococococococococococococococococ including the one who doesn't have amnesia? I went and re-watch the scene and they never look at each other. Weird. It's very bizarre. Yeah, he should have remembered her because she's like a stunning

beauty wearing a gown and he spilled hot chocolate on it. Like I would think about that for the rest of my life. And her on fiancé, Tad was very rude to him. Yeah, Tad's a dick. But he's also like not that much of a dick. When he befriends that man who lives on a lake fishing cabin? Oh, Tad. There's so much nonsense in this fucking movie. I mean, like, every time Tad shows up again, I'm like, oh tad. He's gone for long stretches of this film. Long stretches.

Like I understand, like my romantic comedy knowledge is very, very slim. But I understand that they have to set her up to be with a guy who's not right for her so that she can meet the guy who is right for her and choose to be with him. But like, a tad is clearly not right for anybody. Right. But like, why not make him an actual dick, like an actual bad person instead of just like a social media influencer, you know? Yeah, I don't get it because that seems like standard fair for the, but maybe not, because because like, you know, when Parker Posey and Tom, th, th, th, th, th, and Tom, th, th, and th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, they, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, that, they, tad, tad, tad, tad, tad, tad, tad, tad, tad, tad, that, that, that, but maybe not, because like, you know, when Parker Posey and Tom Hanks were together and they're obviously not for each other. But she's

a fucking delight. Yeah, she's delightful, but just not his delightful. And then Meg Ryan's with that guy that was in everything for five minutes and I haven't seen him in 20 years. Yeah, I wonder what happened to that guy. I don't even remember his goddame name. No. My my my my my my my my my my my my my my my the their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I th. I th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's they's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I. I th. I. I th. I th. I their. I their. I their. I'm. I'm. It is. I'm. I'm. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, their. It's, their. I'm. I'm obviously. I'm obviously. I'm the guy. I don't know. I don't even remember his god-dame. No. My brain just said David Allen Greer, but it's definitely not David Allen career. That was not Dag in that movie. Because he was in everything for five minutes, and I feel like I haven't seen him in 20 years.

Except for what we did Tales from the Hood, and he was the bad guy in that. Yeah, but that was in his five minutes, right? Yeah, for sure. He had a TV show called Dag. Dag. See, also the thing that I know about Romcombs is they have to come together, then have a falling out and then near the end of the movie, get back together again. Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl back. That's it, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the. the. the. the. the. the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tod. today. today. today. today. today. today. today. the the the the the the the the the the the the the together again. Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl back. That's it, right? Yeah, yeah. Okay. See, like my problem here is that I'm very, very conditioned for horror, so I just kept expecting something really bad to happen. Like when she gets to, and I'm jumping ahead here, but when she gets to short, short over

streets resort, and she meets the kid and the grandma, who are just so sweet. I'm expecting them them to to to to to them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be murdered to be murdered to be murdered to be but when she gets to Short Over Street's resort, and she meets the kid and the grandma who are just so sweet, I'm expecting them to be murdered, you know? Right, right. Like, tragedy must befall these people. Suddenly, this is going to turn into a wrong-turn sequel? Yes. Eliza Dushkoo's gonna show up? Yes. So Tad and Lohan go out on one of your favorite ideas for an adventure,

which is going snowmobiling. I hate snowmobiling. I know you really want to do it. Fucking dangerous. I don't. Stop telling people that. It doesn't go well for them either. They snowmobile up to the top of a mountain. Because Tad saw some extreme something or other. They're both influencers. We should mention that as th th th th th th th th th to the top of a mountain because Tad saw some extreme something or other. They're both influencers. We should mention that as well. Right, they're doing it for the Graham. But neither of them are on their phones very much, which I found, mm-hmm. They definitely talk a lot more about social media than they actually use social media. Sure, sure. Also, um, it's going to come back later in this movie. They. They. They. They. They. They. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They're, they. They're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're both. They're they're they're they're. They're. They're. They're they're they're. They're they're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both they're both. They're both. They're both. They'rethey actually use social media. Sure, sure.

Also, it's going to come back later in this movie, but when we first see Lindsay Lohan going down stairs, you hear on security headphones, Miss Lohan is entering the elevator to go downstairs. What this movie presupposes is that when she's missing for three days, no one has noticed. Right, because her dad's away on business, so everyone else is just like... Uh-huh. I kept hoping that she was going to get together at the end with Terry, the assistant, and he would teach her the meaning of humility, but that's not what happened.

It's not, but there is a twist. Yes! I was just joking about marrying Terry. So, they go up to the top of this cliff and he proposes to her, the ring's too big, she falls off the cliff and the ring doesn't catch her when he, that's the only thing he grabs of her hand. Right. Very funny and immediately I'm like please let there be a blood-sucking monster in the mountains that East town alive, you know I just watched that new movie troll that's on Netflix It's about a giant troll like storming through Norway. I feel like that's new. I feel like I've seen that movie well there you might be thinneu. I thrown throwning through Norway. I feel like that movie well, you might be they th they they they they they they they they they they they they th. they thi that you that you might that you might that you might thi that you might thi thi that you might thi, you might thi, you might thi thi that you might thi. You might the you that that that that that that that that that that you might you might you might you might that you might that you might that you might that you might you might you might you that you that you that you that you might you might you might you might you might you might you might you might you might you might you might you might you might you might thi you might thi you might thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi throoooooooo. you might be thi thi thi thi thi thi This is more like Godzilla. Oh cool. Like troll as Kaiju. Oh, I should watch it? Yeah. Okay. That sounds so great out my alley. We'll do it on this

podcast. If only we had a podcast or we could discuss these things. But we only do wrongcomcons now. No, I refuse. So she falls off this cliff and falls really far away and then hits her head in a way that I was offended by? Because of the death of Sonny Bono. Oh yeah. He was skiing and slammed into a tree and died. And I think that's the same way that the woman who was married to Liam Nieson died, too. Yeah, Natasha Hensridge, she was skiing.

I think she fell backwards and hit the back of her head. Oh, okay. Oh, no, wait, not Natasha Henstridge. She's still alive. Natasha, fuck. Lione. She's still alive. Natasha Richardson. There you go. Natasha Richardson. Yeah, she was um, skiing and hit her head, yeah. So I was like, maybe this isn't the best thing to do

in a movie. It does feel a little dark. It does. It does. But they had to give her a... If it put her in a car accident or something, it's like, you sure sure but it's a movie she could just fall a little bit and wake up and not remember the thing you just have to write it that way you're right she need not hit her head it's not like we're looking for plausible deniability in this film because it's full of loopholes how dare you it's perfect so she is found by Chordover Street who has taken a couple from his, who are staying at his, his resort, which is more like a B&B experience than like a big

fancy resort. He's taking them on a sleigh ride where they're all three of them are singing jingle bells and I just thought this is a fucking nightmare. I don't know if this will mean anything to you but that woman looks like a low budget Lauren Lapkis to me. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, to th, th, th, th, to th, th, to thi, to to to to to to to to to the their, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thethis will mean anything to you, but that woman looks like a low-budget Lauren Lapkis to me. Yes, she does. And I couldn't get over it. She was very strange looking. And I don't mean that in a mean way, but just you don't see, I mean like, on British

television we see a lot of people that look like people, which is kind of nice because you're like, I could be an a thi. film and television, you only see like extremely beautiful people. Yeah. And I feel like she, something, she see, I, I, me. British TV, I love it. You can have a speech impediment, teeth colored teeth and look like a regular human being and you could be a star on television. It's wild. Yeah. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I. I I I I. I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I feel like like like like like like like like like th television. It's wild. Yeah, I love it. Yeah. I don't need those glow in the dark teeth that everybody in American TV has now.

It's weird. It's weird that like regular people whiten their teeth in America. You know what I mean? What are we all going to fucking life. Get over it. Yeah. I say this but I get Botox, so it's like, I'm being judgmental. If it makes you feel better to get your Was it little Uzi who put the diamond in his forehead and then someone stole it? I mean, someone stole it. I'm pretty sure someone stole it, because why wouldn't you? I mean, given the opportunity, I'd pry a diamond

out of someone's forehead for sure. That's a diamond. What a dingling. What a dingling. I mean, you do you, Bo. Yeah, you know. So yes, she's discovered by Chord and the singing Numskulls. Who immediately roll her over, and it's like, yes, definitely roll over this unconscious person who presumably has major injuries. She could be a, she could have a spinal injury. What are you doing? And Shored, as a person who runs a ski resort, I feel should know something about first aid. Sure, sure. Particularly spinal injuries, because that's something that happens, you know?

I feel like everybody who gets taken off a mountain gets taken off on a backboard. Yeah. You don't just grab their arm and say, hey baby. You sure is beautiful, Lindsay Lowe. I am. I'm gonna put my tongue in your mouth. Oh no, they're watching. Stop looking at me, budging Lord Lafkus. She wakes up in the hospital, and all I could think about was that scene, and I know who killed me, where she goes, leg, arm, hand, oh God. I loved every second of that. But also, when she woke up from that coma and I know who killed me, the cops were really

shitty to her then, too. Yeah. And the sheriff is being really shitty to her in the scene. The hospital and the, because she wakes up as she's a dick. Right, because you woke up with a head injury and you're like, where am I? I don't know anything. Somebody help me? And they're like, how about we don't help you? And she's like, eh. But she's also like being an entitled weenie as well. Yeah, I think honestly, both the cop and the doctor are like, why don't you take her home, Chored Over Street?

Why don't you foster to adopt her? I'm like, you can't just try her out. And he's like, yeah, I have no idea who this woman is. I've never seen her before in my life. That makes perfect sense. You met her yesterday. And, Tad also fell off the mountain. We'll get back to him in about 25 minutes. Yes, at this point

I was like, ha ha ha ha, ha, Tad is still out there. So he's like, yeah, I'll take her and everyone else is like, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, because we don't want her shitting all over this place. She's not how strange. Now this brought up a question for me. Yes. Amnesia. How does it work? Do people who have amnesia know how to do like everyday things, like, to make pancakes? Like, their things, like, to be a thanks........a.a.a, to.a, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make, to make. to make. to make. to make. to make, make, make. to make, make, make, make, make, make. to make, make, make. to make, make. to make..a.a.a, make.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a. to.a.a. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to, to, to, to, to, to. to. to, to. to. to, to. like Quicksand where I thought it would be much more

of a problem when I was a kid than it turned out to be. I think it's, I think amnesty is like super rare. Sure. Um, and like it seems to only ever be selective like I've forgotten my name and what my butt does. It's never like, I forgot the whole life. Yeah, I don't know this language anymore. Okay. You know?

Yeah. Okay. Because this gets very like Goldie Hawn and overboard where she doesn't know how to do anything because she's rich? Is it because she's rich or is it because she has amnesia? You know? Well, I think that not knowing how to make a bed is because she's never had to make a bed. Making a bed is very self-explanatory. Not for Lindsay Lohan.

So she has am, but also she's dumb as hell. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, got it. She's an influencer. We're influencers, are you saying we're dumb as hell? Because I am, I'm dumb as hell. I'm dumb as hell, but I make a mean bed. That's because I'm poor. I'm like book smart, but life dumb. Is that a thing? Can I be that? Yeah, absolutely. Okay. I don't think you're life dumb either. I think you're just life blind. You just would rather not. And wait, blind people aren't rather not.

They really can't see. It's just true. I'm opening a second bottle of wine. I'm sorry. Get that hole, get that shovel, and let's go for it. I highly recommend you all sign it for the Patreon to find out what John Wick's going to be like. Oh yeah. we're recording that next. And this is, ooh, yeah. So he takes her to his bed and breakfast resort. That looks like Christmas Duncom did all over the goddamn thing. He's like, we can't afford to stay here. And I was like, maybe it's your fucking electric bill. Do you know how many LED lights you have plugged in. So...

Of Christmas tree. You have so many Christmas trees. You don't need that many Christmas trees. You're the only ones there. So she has a head wound when she goes to bed, but when she wakes up at Chordorovstreets, no more does she have a head wound and that is never referenced again. Nope. And then we see, oh sorry, please. I was gonna say the best, the funniest thing in the movie happens. What's the funniest thing in the movie?

She opens her window and a raccoon yells at her and she screams and falls down. Yeah, that's fair though. Ha ha ha ha ha! So he's like, yeah, we don't have any clothes for you. Let's th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho, tho, thu, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the the, the, the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin, thin, than, than, than, than, than, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, than,. Let's go through the Lost and Found, and he finds like an old nightgown and like some shit. But then later in the movie, she's just wearing like skinny jeans and cute sweaters. What's their, in the Lost and Found,

they had a hundred pairs of shoes that fit her. Yeah, she looks great. Then we do catch up with Tad again, he's doing a real like sort of dead stream vibe of talking into his phone, recording a video, and then his phone dies. Yeah, so sad. Is it? So sad for Ted. And that's when he finds the ice fisherman. Ralph. Ralph? Ralph. And somehow, Ted ends up with hooks in his face. Yes, he's got a fishing lore in his face and when Ralph pulls it out, he like faints. And I was like, oh, now Ralph is going to ritualistically torture and kill him. No, no. It's not Ralph hostile. My notes I have so many times, this is not a horror movie. Stop it. Katie, talking to you myself, Katie. This is not a horror movie.

Stop expecting everyone to be ritualistically murdered. Quick question for you. Yeah. How does Ralph have electricity in that shack that's on a lake? Yeah. A generator. I'm going to go with he as a generator. Maybe. No, because we don't to to the tea as a generator. Maybe, maybe.

No, because we don't hear a generator, it would be loud. So when Lindsay Lohan wakes up, she reaches for the remote control to open her blinds. This is where the raccoon scare happens. But when she turns on the TV, which opens Netflix, and which I was like, you know, this, the hotel just gives everybody their Netflix account. Yeah, every hotel I've ever stayed in where they have like a Roku, you have to sign in with your own Netflix account. And then I get really nervous about not signing out because I'm like, what are you going to watch on there?

You're to fuck up my algorithm and or steal my financial information. One or both. But I have seen the movie the movie, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. the the th. the th. the the th. th. I th But I have seen the movie that comes off on the TV. What is it? Which is a castle for Christmas? Starring Brooke Shields and Carrie Elwis? I think, wait, is that where she's a ghost? He fucks her ghost? No, I wish. Although I have proposed to Missy that I was going to propose this to you, that next year we do only ghost fucking movies at Christmas time to an entire month of, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, a thi, a thi, a thi, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, a castle, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th.... th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to, to, to, to, to, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, is, thi, is, propose this to you, that next year we do only ghost fucking movies at Christmas time to an entire month of ghost fucking romcoms, because there's enough to do it. Let me see how my depression is, and if so, I'll do it, if not do two weeks.

Is that cool? Wait, if you're not depressed, you'll do two weeks. No, strike it it reverse it if I'm too depressed I cannot watch. I cannot watch four ghost fucking movies I just can't. No she is a world famous author who has killed off her main character who was also modeled on her now ex-husband and she moves to Scotland to buy a castle and Carrie Elwis owns the castle she's buying and hilarity ensues. Is he hunky at least? It's Carrie Elwis, yeah. He's very much like he is in the Black Christmas remake. Oh yeah I forgot he was in that! Yeah! Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So we meet the daughter of Chordover Street.

Is that Abby? She's got the most lovely hair I've ever seen on a human. Yeah. And then Abby, Abby gives Lindsay Lohan a new name, which is very close to her old name. Yes, she decides that her name is going to be Sarah, but her real name is Sierra, and we're supposed to be like, wow, that's wonderful. You guys did it.

Yeah, great. I haven't feel like there were high fives around the writer's room when that was figured out. Yeah. And I also thought there's no way this woman doesn't hate children. Yes, I felt it seemed to me like it should pain her to be near a child. Yeah. But she's so tender-hearted. She loves it. Loves every second she's with Abby.

Does not seem right. She's like, someday I will be your new mom. Yeah. Yeah. So earlier in the movie she said she doesn't do bacon, I believe. And then Abby, like at they're at a breakfast bar at the bed and breakfast and Abby teach like, you gotta try bacon. It's delicious.

And she loves bacon. I mean, bacon is delicious. But she's eating it like a cast away. She's just like shoving it into her face like she's never eaten before and I thought well they've probably fed you at the hospital. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean I guess it's supposed to make her seem poorer or less image conscious or... I... Yes. Yes.

Or it's supposed to be like, these dickheads who are given up on bacon need to figure out the bacon is god damn delicious. Yeah, it just, it feels very pro-poor industry. Yeah, big pork. Oh, you think big pork is involved? I think that someone had to pay for this movie to get made, yeah. It's true. This does have pork's fingerprints all over it, these greasy, greasy fingerprints. Greasy little hoof prints all over it.

Later when she's just dangling a string of salami and like waving it around like a lasso, you're like, what, this has nothing to do with the movie. I was thinking about curling my hair, you know, like a tight little tail and a pig. But not a cute pig, one that deserved to die. For this delicious, delicious bacon. Give me a little bit of Bugatti. So we see some more stuff with Ralph and Tad. Ralph throws an ice axe at him at him at one point when he's clearly not

ready for it. I was like, Ralph uncool, that is never cool. Ralph's a little bit of a loose cannon. He is, but he's a delight. He's definitely a friend you have to apologize for before he shows up some place. And then again afterwards. Yeah. With like a hint of I told you so. I did mention that this was going to happen, but yes. We the the the th th we th we th we th we th we th we th we th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. thee. th. th. the. the. th. th. the. th. I th. I th. I told you so. I did mention that this was going to happen, but yes. We get a montage of Lindsay Lohan doing chores around the bed and breakfast, like trying to put a fitted sheet on a bed, which she cannot do. It's like, I mean, like, they were a pain in the ass, but like, also very self-explanatory. I was very, I thought this was very good physical acting from Lindsay Lohan. When she gets bundled up? Yes, and when she's, yes, when she gets bundled up, I thought was very funny.

And when she's plunging the toilet and it sprays in her face, I thought it was very funny too. I think she's a very expressive actor. Yeah. And the shit we've seen her in just does not give her the opportunity to thi, thu, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I, th, I, I, I, I, I, I, thi, I, I, I, I thi, I thi, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I that, I thin, I thin, I that, I thin, I thin, I that, I that, I the, I the, I thus, I thus, I thus, I thus, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I thin, I thin, I thin, thin, thin, thin, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that give her the opportunity to do that. Like this is a better movie than those, you know? Wait, are you saying this is a better movie than I know who killed me? No, I'm saying this is a better movie than in the shadows. Was that the werewolf movie? Oh yeah, the one where she's green screened in and never met anyone else in the cast. Never was near anyone. staring down the barrel of the camera the entire time. She spent the entire time making that movie on a yacht in a Bifa when everybody else was like in Prague making a movie.

I love her. Oh, God bless her. Yes, I have the note hilarious bed-making scene. Yeah. She's like learning how to do laundry, but does that thing where I guess you put too much soap in and it like overflows with bubbles everywhere. Yeah. And Chord, Overstreet is super mad. He's like, I don't fucking need this right now. You just have to clean up the bubbles, Chord. She didn't set it on fire. But she also runs away like a child when she gets chastised about the laundry instead of helping clean it up. She's like,.-ah! It just runs. Their relationship is a little daddy-daughtery at times.

It's a little upsetting. He's like, let me teach you how to make a pancake like I taught my little baby girl. She's like, yay, flapjack daddy! I'm gonna to stop calling my husband flapjack daddy. Oh boy, he's gonna hate that. It's better than just flap daddy. Oh. So she's, she's, Abby is like comforting her in her great dismay after the laundry incident and she has a mom flashback. She's like I remembered a mom. A mom. Who's brushing her hair in soft light and I was like no this is not what brushing a small child's hair is. Brushing a small child's hair is like holding

them down with your leg around their waist being like, it's not that bad, relax. Having never brushed a small child's hair, I'm gonna take your word for it. I'm gonna give you the opportunity. Come over and brush the kid's hair. So they go to like a big town event. The Christmas Market. Were you surprised that Summit Springs elected a black mayor? Because I sure was. No, because the cast has been the the the the the th the thed the No because the the cast has been very diverse up to this point which I

was excited about. In what way? I mean there's a couple of Hispanic people. And then like a lot of the people who were at and working at the hotel were people of color and stuff. I did not notice that in any way. And also just like rich ski towns, black mayor, I'm sorry. It feels very pleasing saddles to me. Which I just watched recently and is still a fucking delight. I got a re-watch. Um, yeah, so this is the part of the movie where I was like, the fuck? Because who is at the Christmas market, Katie?

Residents of Summit Springs? And? I don't know, you tell me. Real-ass Santa Claus. Santa Claus is damn self. Oh, Santa Claus is damn self. It's Santa Claus is damn self. It's Santa was at the Christmas market making dreams come true.

He's just working at a booth though, he's just being a vendor. It just like paid his vendor fees and here he is. He's like watching a booth for someone. Yeah. He's selling a new sleigh and you're like, oh this movie's gonna have the Christoph from Frozen ending, which is where he gets a new sled. Okay, okay. Hey, okay I never seen it. He'd be alright. So Santa gives Lindsay Lohan a snow globe just like the

snow globe she had earlier in the movie that reminded her of her mom. He does not give it to a short over Street buys it for her. Oh that's right. Can I get my daughter girlfriend girlfriend? This this one., that's right. Can I get my daughter girlfriend? This one. Thanks, slapjack, daddy. You see now it's gone. I can't call Rob then. Yeah. This is where I have the note. She's getting the hang of life. Is she though? I don't know. Getting men to buy the hang of life. Is she though? I don't know why.

Getting men to buy things for her. I've never been to a tree lighting ceremony in a small ski town. They got fireworks. Yeah, I guess. Yeah, weird, right? Yeah. My next notes are very scattered, so I don't know how quickly they come in the movie, but I just have things like, he would have an acoustic guitar, would chored over street.

Not making out after falling in the snow. Nice work. A ski lodge going out of business in a ski town might want to look at what you're doing wrong. Well Katie, businesses fail, you know this. Yeah, but it seems like a license to print money if you inherited a lodge. I open this Hawaiian shaved ice stand in the middle of the desert. I should be raking in the money. So we learned that he was married to the daughter of Alejandra, mother of Avi. I don't remember her name.

Uh, Carla, maybe? Carla. Yeah. Carla's dad had owned this lodge and he gave it to them on their wedding day. Yeah, weird present. Here's the rest of your life weekends and holidays. Yeah. It was a curse that he had to get rid of. Yes, he was like, finally she is a wed. Ha ha ha. You've taken my daughter property and now taken my regular property.

But also, like, does he just have a boner for women whose dad's own hotels? Oh yeah. Yeah. Nothing gets chored, more turgid. Oh God, tergid, shored. So he has this like angel tree topper that he can't bring himself to put on the tree because he and Carla had bought it. Yeah. Which is a weird touch. Because like you also like I don't know everything in this house has been touched everything in this lodge has been touched by her you know. Yeah. He says I can't bring myself to put it on the tree. I need you to do it. I need your help. I guess. Here's where I have the note, all in capital letters, with multiple exclamation points and a question mark. How is no one looking for this hotel hereys? It's been days. Nobody. And she's clearly just on the other side of

town. She was at the light, like how did the mayor of Summit Springs not know her? Because she has a conversation with him. He doesn't seem to interact with Beauregard Belmont at all. That doesn't make sense to me. Like he would know the owner of one of the biggest businesses in the town. Yeah, maybe. I don't know. I don't know.

Chamber of Commerce, Alan. Somebody there would have recognized her. Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. But also, no one is on the internet, no one is on a cell phone. It's very bizarre. Her phone has gone missing, which means that she is just dead to the world. Right, exactly. And even like her father's been away for a couple days, but they seem very close, like he didn't try to text her and think it was weird that she didn't reply. No, it's so weird.

And her assistant, I can't remember his name, Terry maybe? Terry, yeah. It's like, yeah, she said she was going somewhere with Tad, so I just thought she was going forever because I have object permanence. I love Terry. I love him. I love him. So Alejandra, the grandmother slash mother-in-law, shows her their memory book which is like a bunch of events that have happened at, I don't know what their fucking place is called. Oh, it's called like Santa's Dick or something. Yes, Santa's Dick, Ski, and Sana. And she suggests having a fundraiser.

Yeah. And he's like... But she doesn't want to tell Chord. Yeah, because Chord gets mad. He says, no, we can't take people's money. And I was like, God damn right, fundraisers are for charities. And she's like, but the memories, you can't even the their their their their their their their their to remember to remember to remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember remember, but the memories and he says, what do you know about memories? You can't even remember your name. And then punches her and pushes her to the ground.

Yeah, that wasn't close. That was a bit aggressive, Short. Yeah. Short is afraid to fall in love again. It's hard. It's got to be hard. I don't know. If I die, I hope Rob finds someone hotter than me. Like, he'll deserve an upgrade.

Don't you think? There is no upgrade from you, Katie. Ugh. I don't know, I've seen Lindsay Lohan's tits. You're the top of the pops. Hmm. I'm sure we could get you to re-ad that animated gift of the let's see look. We could get me to reenact it as well. Anyway she's like I'm out of here and the little girl's like you can't leave you're my new mom.

And she's like okay. And also we realize we haven't seen Tad in three days. Yeah. He's just been with Ralph walking. Yeah. Because Ralph's like, yeah, it's gonna take like two or three days to get over the mountain. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the the the the the the the the the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the little. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. So. So. So. So. So. So. So, th. So. So. So, to. So. to. to. to. to. th. to. the. the. th. the. the. the, it's gonna take like two or three days to get over the mountain. And how? He wasn't two or three days from civilization. Yeah, but he, you know, fell down a whole mountain. There's no ski resorts on the other side of the mountain? How do mountains work? I don't know. I live in a mountainous area, I can't tell you. I don't do outdoor winter activities.

Chord kind of tells her that he's horny for her, but like confused by the horniness. Yeah. Yeah. And then she's like, I have to go home wherever that is. I'm going to leave now. Where was she going to go? I don't know if she was going to take all those free clothes with her though. Yeah really. Lost and found skinny jeans. Size 2. So they're going to have this party on Christmas Eve, which also seems like a terrible idea. Like do it on the 23rd because people have plans on Christmas Eve, especially at 7 p.m. Like that's when you stuff the squid. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to th. to to th. th. th. I to to th. to to to th. to to to to to to to to th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm to to to to to to to to to t. I'm to. to. to.e.e. to.e. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. 7 p.m. Like, that's when you stuff the squid, and you have to wash your pillowcase, and you have to take a, excuse me,

and you have to take a shower before you go to bed or your pillowcase will smell like fish. We live different lives. Yeah, dude. Bugadi. Bugatti. So, and also, it's 2022. It is. And they are handing out paper flyers and making no internet presents about this party happening. It's insane. It's like they're standing outside the door of the venue handing out flyers.

They're the fucking street team for this B&B. Speaking of, I accidentally opened up my Facebook app on my phone today and I was like, what is this? It's been so long since I've been on Facebook. Were people posting on there? Oh, I don't know. I like immediately closed it again. I was like, this is weird. I don't want to be here. I wonder what's happening on our Facebook page, anything? I don't know. Couldn't tell you. The other day I thought I want to thank Facebook for fucking it up so bad that I don't

even want to go there anymore. I appreciate that. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like Twitter is trying to do that now as well. Yeah, but then I'll have telling me things. No, you're like radio-free Europe, you're just bringing information to the world. So finally, Ralph and Tad make it to the police station. Yeah. The sheriff's fucking socks though, because he like comes across Ralph's abandoned truck. And he's just like, oh, oh, that Ralph may be dead at this point he's in the wilderness he's out there poaching again oh seriously like he's probably dead yeah yeah this is where I have the note the sheriff is worse than an

Italian police chief in an Argento film he does nothing it's a fucking horror movie the movie horror movie. I don't have them. Oh, they're about to make out and the mayor interrupts them because they're having the party and no one has shown up yet so they're going to kiss. And the mayor's like, hey, I'm the mayor and I came to your party. So but but grandma has bought her this like smoking dress. She looks great. Yeah. And Lindsay Lohan comes down the stairs in this smoking hot dress. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. I. It. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, tho, tho, thi, the tho, the the the the the the the the the tho, the mayor, the mayor, the mayor, the mayor, the mayor, the mayor, the mayor, the mayor, the mayor. Oh, the mayor. Oh, the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Oh, the th. Oh, the th. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi's, thi.ooo. Oh, thi. Oh, thi's, the thi. Oh, the the the thi. Oh, th Yeah. And Lindsay Lohan comes down the stairs in this smoking hot dress and looks around and goes, it looks wonderful. It's like it fucking looks like it always does. Covered in Christmas lights, there's something else.

What are you talking about? Maybe she saw her own boobs in her reflection as she came down the stairs. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And you're going to find this hard to believe, but they're having a big heartfelt moment at the party, and that's when Tad and Dad show up to take Lindsay home. Sierra, I remember that name. That's my name. And then we see a montage of the movie we've already seen. But like, you, come on, on bitch you made him put his dead

wife's angel on the tree you can't just walk away now. God damn it that should have been the tag line of this film. Yeah. And I love the suit that Tad is wearing with the chains on it. It looks insane. It's like this sort of like pocket chains I think. Yeah, yeah, for sure. What? Why? It's so weird.

So, yeah, we get a bunch of like montage padding at this point of like, did you remember? I did. I did remember. And then Tad has like, I could only think of his hair being like, uh, who are the people who live in the village that the Grinch is going to? The who's? Yeah, he's got like, who hair. Yeah, he's got who hair. And she's like, going into the, like, theyr. And she's like at the regular or her dad's resort, which also I want to go into that hot tub that's at the top of the resort that has the glass on it

Yeah, except I'm terrified the glass would break I mean it's scary, but I do it. Yeah, for sure for sure. That's why they make beer. Uh, that's why they make beer. So yeah, she's like at her dad's resort and like flipping flap jacks that her flapjack daddy taught her how to do. And everybody at the resort is like, you're so cool now. It's very much the scene and overboard where Goldie Hawn opens the beer and starts drinking it. Everyone's like, what?

I don't know that I've ever seen that film. But I understand that in 2022 2022 it's a very problematic movie. It's so problematic because essentially he kidnaps her and makes her a sex slave mom. Yeah. But also like Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn are both so beautiful and they have such wonderful chemistry that you're like I love it. It's so good. So she tels Tad she's not down to cloud with him? Basically, but you're not exactly sure like why? I mean, what changes her mind? The montage reminded her that she loves a chored overstreet.

I guess. I like that we have not used his character name once in this movie because it is, I think, Jake Russell, which is very similar to Jack Russell, which I like a lot. You know, I like that. She has a heart-to-heart with Jack Wagner and tells him that she doesn't want to be the VP of Atmosphere. Oh, right. He was trying to give to give to give to give to give, to give, to give, to give, to give, to give, to give, to give, to to to to to th. thi, I thi, I thi, I that's that's that's that's, I that's, I that's, I that's that's, I that's, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. thi. thi, I thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, th.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a. I'm th. thi. thi. thi. thi. job that she didn't want. And he's like, well, I just wanted to make sure that you've had money and had a good life. That's all I wanted to do for you. I've always loved you. Set up a trust fund. Yeah.

Yeah. They have a press conference, she's like, they took care of me at the Santa's Dick Lodge. I love the Santa's Dick lodge. And then the phone, they're booked up for the rest of the year. Oh yeah, Alejandra gets so many calls if you want to stay at Santa's Dick. The like switchboard is lighting up and she doesn't pick up the phone at all, she just picks up her cell phone and she's like, charred, we've got reservations. It's like, Alejandra, hang up and take them. And Tad does not care that she's broken up with him because he says nothing like a breakup to really add to your numbers. Exactly. Like the try guys.

I have the vaguest notion of what that is. Same. I'm just making the joke because I think that's what happened. So Chord goes up and spills his guts to the window of a stretch of Hummer. The conversation that he's having to a closed window is like weird and a little bit gross to me. Yeah. Yeah. So the window comes down and it's Tad and Terry in the back seat of the... Yes, Tad says to Terry that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th th is the the the the the the the the the the the thi the that's that's that's that's that's the is. So the window comes down and it's Tad and Terry in the back seat of the armor. Yes, Tad says to Terry what are you doing for New Year's Eve and Terry's like, oh. Which I was like, yeah, tad throw it around man, do what you got to do. Yeah, Tad's gonna fuck him. Yeah, Terry seems nice. Yeah, Terry seems nice. Yeah, that's thi that's nice. th nice. th nice. thi thi that's nice. that's nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice. that's nice nice nice nice. that's nice nice. that's nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice. Yeah. Yeah, that's nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice Santa is now working a booth outside of the fucking resort, of Jack Wagner's

resort. And he's like, hey, Chored Overstreet, Lindsay Lohan's in the back of the building. Yes, yes, right. And he goes out there. Where the fuck does he get mistletoe? He just has mist toe. Ech. That's a Chordover Street special.

He's over, oh, he's got the toe on him. I guess. So, I don't, I wish I had written it down, but I have sick amnesia joke. Oh, shit. I don't know what the joke was. I don't know. My notes are all like, ew. I mean, like, I guess it's sweet. It's way less toxic than love, actually. It's nice. It works for them both, right? Where Liam Neeson and that 10-year-old boy were having a weird relationship. They were having sex. No. So doesn't like Santa

point to dad and Avi? Like, yeah, like, hey, look, they're making out over there. I did that. I'm I'm Santa Claus. So they're making out and Avi comes out and he was like, not now, kid, dad's getting a boner. And that's the end of the movie. Chord's got a chord. Shord's chord is tour-jord. And then that's the end of the movie. Except for a blooper reel. There's bloopers!

You love a blooper real though. I do. Did you like it? I did. It was cute. Didn't it make you think Lindsay Lins Lins I did, it was cute. Didn't it make you think Lindsay Lohan is just like the coolest to hang out with? And or she didn't understand how anything around her works. No, it does seem, it seemed a little bit hard for her but uh, I love her. Katie. Alan. Let's ring in the new year with a rating space. Okay. You go first. It's confusing for me.

Because I don't... It makes it sound like you fell in love with the movie. I did not. It's confusing for me because I don't understand why you would make a movie where nobody gets disemboweled. But like, I guess that's fine. Sure. I don't know. Is this like, I have so little experience with the genre that I don't know if it's good or bad. Just tell me how you felt at the end of this movie.

It was not as tedious as many, many, many, many, many movies we've done. Sure. And I, it wasn't, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, that, that, that, that, but, that, that, that, that, that, but, that, that, that, that, that, but, that, but, but, but, that, but, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. But. But. But, th. But, th. But, I th. But, I th. th. th. th, I th, I th, I th that, like, I th that, like, like, I that, that, that, th that, that, th th thi. th th thi. th that, th th th. th. felt at the end of this movie. It was not as tedious as many, many, many, many, many movies we've done. Sure. And I wasn't, I mean, it was far as like romantic comedies go, there was like very little kissing, which I don't like to watch people get. So I'll give it a six and a half, I thought it was fine. Oh, I love it. Yeah, I think a six six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, six, th, th, th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the. the. the. the. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha, tha, tha, th. th. th. Yeah. Uh, yeah, I think it's six, six and a half is a good score for this. Yeah. You could spend an hour and a half way worse than this? Yeah, we have way worse.

Sure. Um, I'm never going to suggest it someone watch it. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, don't watch it. I do appreciate all the, like, fans that have sent us. this this this this thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, to, uh, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, thi, thi. I, to, to, to, to to thi. thi. watch it. Would I do appreciate all the like fans that have sent us messages like, well, I just watched Lindsay Lohan falling for Christmas. It's like, well, guys, we're just gonna talk about you don't have to watch these. Yeah, I mean, we're gonna tell you the plot. And also like, you're welcome. She's a delight. She's a delight. thi, I mean, thi the the the th, th, thu, thu, thu, thu thu thu thu thu thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, that, th-I th, thi, thi, that, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thi, like, thin, like, like, thin, like, thin, like, like, thin, like, thi. thi, thi, thi, thterrible werewolf movie, she was delightful. You can just tell she's charming.

I don't think in the terrible werewolf movie you can tell that she's charming, but in this movie you can tell she's charming. I like that she threw her sister a bone? Sister gets a little roll. Well, her sister is a musician, I think she has some talent. Okay, sure sure I could be wrong about that You never know you're talking about the American singer actress model and television personality Ali Lohan alley low hand alley low hand? Yeah, I am. Yeah, okay. Okay. That's what I'm talking about? Yeah, okay. Katie do you know what else is gonna make your new year? that much better? Tell me. We got the call? Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the the the the the the the the th. I the th. I th. I th. I th. I thi the thi the the the thi the thi the the thi thi the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi else is going to make your new year that much better? Tell me. We got the call from Claudia. Claudia! Welcome back! Welcome back! Welcome back! I was so excited that I had to text Katie and let her

know that we had gotten your call, Claudia. Claudia! Cloudia called! So here is Claudia with her bullet points. Hi Katie and Alan. I have bullet points this time. This is Claudia from Salt Lake City, Utah. And I'm also the person that has like 26,000 minutes listen to on Spotify. And I guess I'm calling because I just want to tell you that I love your show and what I've learned from listening to Weirwolf Ambulance. Okay, so my top two favorite episodes have taught me that I can laugh at

scary things. Growing up I I would wear cap to the midnight release of Twilight. And after I listened to your show, I just couldn't stop thinking about, I think it was Katie that said, why doesn't Edward just drink out of the Diva Cup? And I just like, cannot, I cannot stop thinking about that for such a long time. And yeah, y'all made for editori funny and let's see. Oh, and I think the reason why my count of minutes on Spotify is so high is because sometimes when I'm listening to your show instead of pushing pause I will just turn the volume down and go on about my day. Yeah thanks for the last and love you guys.

Claudia. Thank you for patting our numbers by just letting the podcast play while you walk away? What? What? What? I don't say this lately. I have never fallen in love with someone based completely on a voicemail before, but these two voicemails have endeared you to me in a way that I can not properly

express. Claudia, you are new. You're, you're us. You are us and we are you and we are one. The joy of being reminded of Katie saying that Edward should drink from a diva cup. Like, I don't remember saying that, but it makes perfect sense. Because like, why wouldn't you? It's like a shot glass of the good stuff too, because it's like really iron rich. Oh man, I love and have missed you so much. Yeah, along two weeks, buddy.

Katie. Alan. What are we going to do next week? Next week, we are doing, uh, a movie you suggested that we've been talking about doing for a little while, but I don't know, I wanted to sit on it, and I'm not sure why, but we'll find out. We're not doing... We want to spruce her January numbers.

Yeah, we do got to bump it out. We always get a dip around the holidays and it makes us feel sad. It's like Halloween peaks and everyone's like, oh god I've had know of this shit. Understandably. Sure. We're going to do the Jordan Peel film. Nope. Nope. You've seen it. I have seen it. I have yet to watch it. I'm excited. I'm excited for you to get to see this now. Yeah. I mean how can you go wrong with Daniel Kalua and and Jordan Peel? I mean. And Kiki Palmer. And Kiki Palmer. And David Keith is in it briefly. Oh, cool. Keith David?

Yeah. Keith David. Goddamid, I get their names confused all the time. David, comma, Keith. Keith David is in the movie. I love Keith David. Yeah, yeah. So come back for nope. There's definitely no horses in it, so Katie has nothing to worry about.

Is that sarcasm? Zero horses are in this film. Dude, are there horses in it? Huh? What? What? Ne? Ne? Are they bad horses?

No horses are bad horses, Al and that was the bad horses? No horses are bad horses, Gady. All horses are bad horses, Alan, that was the wrong answer. If I were the Sphinx, I would not let you through. You know you don't want to go behind that thing, right? Sphinx back there. I'm going to shoot myself in a space-mow. I can't be just fucking said that. So come back for no- It's like I was bracing myself for it and it still hit me like a ton of bricks. Don't you do this to me? Don't you do this to me? Oh, imagine the pastibilities. Just imagine, could you, like, let's say like 15 years ago, could you have thought to yourself, one day a moron will come to me and ask me to do a podcast with him? And I will say yes.

It's been the greatest joy of my life other than raising my child. Who is terrible when it comes to brushing her hair? She just wants treads. Let her have treads. Fff! Katie say goodbye to these nice people. Bye. Happy holidays. It's over now. You're welcome. Happy New Year, you're welcome. We did that for you. We ended it for you. Come back for Nope. And thank you for listening to another episode of Whewulf Ambulance.

Bye-bye. Empty? Clear. Sp-bye. Empty? Clear. Spicy. Meet the ball. Bougatty. Oh, the today's today's at the pool. Nowhere's the today's at the pool. No way to do with Finland's to fulfill reviews. Kill the clouds and let the face. Keeling in aerospace. Up here inside to cast your case. Please make a good idea in your case. Give the clouds and let the face, King in the atmosphere,

A peer in sarcastic case, Please make I continue to break. The empty. Marlowe and comedy reviews hungry, hungry, Brian, burnt wings and Stephen King. The end team. We live deliciously bad tempo trees of bees recently come today. A paranormal like the tibs from Mr. Rogers city.

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