Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 42- Spider Baby (1967)

Episode Date: August 10, 2015

In this episode, we make an overdue foray into the '60s to discuss the absolutely bonkers 1967 Lon Chaney Jr. film "Spider Baby." Special topics for your consideration include: socially acceptable drunk driving, VERY VERY subtle references to "The Wolf Man," the weird dating lives of legal secretaries, tiptoeing into exploitation cinema and what it truly means to be pre-pre-natal. Have you seen this movie? What did you think of it? Tell us at facebook.com/werewolfambulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance or on Twitter @werebulance.  Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast. 

Hello and welcome to another episode of Wearewolf Amulins. Shaky Guy Boys. That's really good. That's really good. I'm Alan and I'm here with my co-host and all-around podcast partner, Katie. I'm Alan and I'm here with my co-host and all-around friend. Katie. I know you're going to say All-A-round friend. Hi Alan. We're only podcast partners. No. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I th- I think. I think- I th I th- I th- I th- I th- I'm th. I'm th. I'm th th- I'm th. I'm th. I'm th- I'm th- I'm th- I'm th- I'm th- I'm th- I th- I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th- I th- I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th. I th. I th. I th th- I th- I thi- I thi- I thi- I thi- I thi-I thi-I thi-I thi-I thi-I thi-I thi-I thi-I thi- I thi- with my co-host and all-around podcast partner Katie I'm that you're gonna say all around friend. Hi Alan we're only podcast partners. No I hardly like you we don't do anything outside of fun. We went to the pool today. Weini garbage watch, 2K15. Start using it people. Smelled bad. Smelled pretty bad. So today we're here to talk about horror comedy classic, weirdo, just crazy bonkers,

crazy go nuts. Probably shouldn't use crazy. Banana's movie. Spider baby. It surprises me to hear you say this was a comedy. Well, if you go to the Wiccing Pedia page, they call it a horror comedy right out of the gate. Did you find it comedic? There's some funny moments in there.

There's a couple of like, um, Wolfman references for Lon Cheney that were in there. Yeah, I liked that. I think it was supposed to be funny, but it's just real creepy. Yeah, I don't, I mean, I don't think that it not being funny took anything away from it. Right. But I just didn't think that it was a comedy. Spoiler alert, there will be spoilers. Yeah. So watch this movie. director's cut version of it on Amazon. I was not paying for that. It's free on YouTube. There's digital, versatile disc versions of it out there as well. It's like $40. Yeah. That's a lot of money.

Yeah. We watched it on YouTube. Yeah. It's not the best feed of it. Mine kept like crackling. Well that one I sent you after it, the next thing that you know it like gives you another movie after it and it was just the same movie. Yeah and it was just. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was just. Yeah. Yeah. It was just. Yeah. It was just. Yeah. It was just. Yeah. Yeah. It was just. Yeah. Yeah. It was just. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was just. It was just. Yeah. Yeah. the. the. the. the the same. Yeah. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. $. 40. th. 40. th. 40. 40. th. 40. th. $. 40. 40. 40. 40. 40. th. 40. $. 40. 40. th. th. $. th. th. th. again. Oh, really? So that may be a better feed. So search around because there's a couple of them. Also, like, why would I want to watch it again? YouTube come up with something better. I just watched it. So this is a movie about a family who the children in this family suffer from a disease called Mary Syndrome. Yes. As far as I could tell, it's an extreme Benjamin Button disease. Exactly.

So the movie, first of all, the title sequence with the animation, so good. Best song in horror. The song is so fucking search out the song. It should have been, it's on the end of the last shark episode. So if you haven't listened to that, go back and give it a listen. If we put the song on the end of that, or if not, um, searching on YouTube. He just watched the movie. There's also two great cover versions of this song that I know. One is by the crossover thrash band, The Acuused. They covered as the Mattest story ever told, which is like the second title of this movie. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the movie. the movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie th of the movie the movie movie th of the movie the movie movie the movie the movie the movie of of of th. Yeah of the movie movie the movie to to to to to to to to to watch to to to to watch to to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch the movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie the movie the movie the movie the movie the movie the movie movie movie movie the movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie th of the movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie th of the movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie the movie movie movie. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. I. I've. I've. Yeah. I've. I've. I've. I've. the the the the the the the and Dave Lombardo from Slayer and the bass player from Mr. Bungle do a cover of it as well.

I'm a huge Mike Patton fan. I love that dude. His album of Italian pop songs from the 60s. So good. Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey guys. I'm talking about the singer from Faith No More. Oh, you know, until recently there was some graffiti in my neighborhood that just said Faith No More sucks. Whoa, that's fucked up.

That's fucked up. It's painted over. Good. Some Faith No. on a clean-cut 60s-looking guy, I would say with a side part and khaki pants. Yeah, Uncle Peter. Uncle Peter. Sitting in an armchair, talking to nobody. To the camera. To the camera.

Why, we're not sure. He's got like a Peter Graves feel to him. Yeah, I wasn't sure in this opening scene what his purpose was, whether he was like a TV personality or a scientist, he's none of these. Right, we learn later that he's the sole surviving heir of this family. Right. So he's talking about Mary disease and what it is.

And he sort of describes how you regress an age. And then he says something about how you can even go pre-prenatal, giving into your cannibal tendencies? Like a real talk? Pre-prenatal just means you don't exist. It doesn't mean you're cannibal. No man, sphems and eggs they be eating everything. Before you were conceived you ate your own. What? That's deep. I was very strange. It's not what that means. Well let's not accuse this movie of having science in it. Yeah, that's very fair. And then it cuts to a a a to a to a that that that th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi pre thi pre thi pre thi pre thi pre pre pre- thin thin' thinat thin' thin' thin' thinat pre pre- pre- pre- pre- pre- pre- pre- pre-prea that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not that's not th. that's not thin. thin. thin. thin. thinat thinat thin. thinat threat. Pre-pane threaten. Pre-paneate threaten threat. Pre-paneate threat. Pre-paneat th. Pre-paneate th. that's not that's not that's not that's not of having science in it. Yeah, that's very fair. And then it cuts to a guy riding the coolest scooter trailer combo I'd ever seen that I desperately wanted, looking for the Mary House.

Right, who's played by a famous actor from like African-American comedies of the 30s, named, named Mantan Morland. He was kind of lambasted after, like, during the 60s and stuff, um, when, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, when, when, and, when, when, and, when, when, and, when, and, and, when, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the the the the the the the, the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, thi, thi., thi., thi., thi., thi., thi., thi., the the thi., the the the the the the the the th 30s named the mantan Morland he was kind of lambasted after like during the 60s and stuff when civil rights came into being like his films were sort of held up as like beacons of what not to do sure sure the music that's playing when he's riding around is like straight out of a monsters episode oh yeah it's like just very TV sitcom of the era yeah it's very Vic-Mizzie sort of yeah I know the guy the guy that composed the the the the the the the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I the the the the the theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. theeeee. the. the. the of the era. Yeah, it's very Vic Mizzi sort of, yeah. Yeah, I know the guy that composed the monster's theme. Yep. So he finds the Mary House, which is of course a big old beautiful house on a hill because houses where bad things happen are always

situated on the hill. I mean it looked, it looked, I was like, is that the psycho house? Yeah, it's strange too because then they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later they later psycho house. It's strange too, because then they later say that there's only two bedrooms in it. Like, what are the other rooms? It's about 6,000 square feet. That house is amazing. Like, just those California houses on a hill sort of vibe to it. So he goes up to the house, no one answers the window falls down and pins him in place? He's a grown-ass man, but he's pinned in place by this window. And then Virginia comes out to play Spider with him. And just stabs the shit out of him. Oh, but it's great because she's doing that like

sort of like real creepy dance. Yeah. I was reading up on this and the actress who played Virginia was 17 in this movie and lied about her age to be in the teag. to to, to, to, to, to, to, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thin, and, and, and, and, and thi, and thi, and the the the thi, and their, and their, and their, and then, and their, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, their, their, their, and their, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the the the the the the the the the the the the th, and, and, and, the th, the the thi, the thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they, they, they, they, they, thi.a, thi.a, they.a, they. Virginia, See, I was wondering how old they were supposed to be in biological years, she and her sister. Yeah. Because at one point, they refer to them as minor children, I guess, and Ralph too, but they're not. I mean, they just appear to be, or they just act as though they are, I guess. But I really liked in this the scene the scene the scene the scene the scene the scene the scene the scene the s s s s the scene the scene the scene the scene the scene thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the thi just act theate the they they they they they they they they they they just act they just act they just act as they just act as they just act as th th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is just act as thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. they're they're they're they they're they thee. they they're they're the delivery messenger guy. His feet are kind of kicking. They show him from the porch and he's like, his feet are kicking sort of comedically. And you're like, oh, this is really tame or whatever. And then all of a sudden his ear hits the floor. It's so gross.

I like that his ear hits the floor and then she just really start stabbing the she. Yeah, like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like a like like like like like like like like like like like like like a scent like like a scent like like the last shark. Or not. She didn't just come up out of the water with her mouth open. Yeah, she could close her mouth, which was a vast improvement. So then Lon Cheney comes home. Right? Is this what happened that too? Okay, Lanchany comes home. And he's like, oh, Elizabeth, I left you in charge. Like, theancheney junior is not exactly of his faculty. I thuuuuuu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, she could tho, she could tho, she could tho, she could tho, she could tho, she could tho, she could tho, she could tho, tho, tho, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. thi. thi. the. theea. theateat theat theat thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Shea. She of these children people in charge. Well, I mean, as we find out during the movie, like, Lanchinie Jr. is not exactly of his

faculties either. No. It's really Bruno, yeah. He's, I guess, the family chauffeur, and he says about 40 times that he promised their dad that he would take care of them. Yeah. But he's doing kind of a shit job. Like immediately, Ralph runs out the gate and it's like, what, you're not... You're not...

I do want to take a quick second to talk about Lon Chaney, Jr. and how sad that dude's life was? I don't know much about his life. Well, his name is Creighton, not Lon. They made him take his father's name. their treat him well. So he hated his father but to get acting gigs he had to take his father's name. That's brutal. Which has got to be fucking awful. He was an alcoholic his entire life. You can tell. Yeah, his not like his face does not look good. And he just had like a

really sad like just not like a happy life. He died. he died in in the 70s. One of his last movies was Dracula versus Frankenstein, which is absolutely terrible. Yeah, it's not a good note to end on. And by that point he had pretty much lost the ability to speak. Why? From smoking and drinking so much. Jesus. He had cancer. Christ. Yeah, it's just like, it's a really sad story, but he's such a, I don't know. I feel so much empathy to that man when I see him on screen. I think I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the th. I th. th. th. Why thi the. the. the. the. the. thi. thi. theate. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. the. the. th I see him on screen. I think starting with Wolfman is such an empathetic character because it's a murder who doesn't want to murder. It's a motto, yeah. And you know, like seeing that movie when you're a teenager and like you're everything you're doing you don't want to actually be doing. So it's like really a character you can identify with so I have a great amount of empathy for that character. Yeah. Comedy podcast. And Ralph is played by Sid Hague, yeah. Most notable for his appearances at this point in Rob Zombie movies.

He looks like celebrity chef Michael Simon in this movie. I don't know who that is, but I'll go with it. You can watch a food network. I was like, why isn't Michael Simon crawling around and wearing shorts all the time like a metal guy? He like, he's like, in the scene, I love when they all come out dressed for dinner and he's wearing shorts and I was like, oh, he's metal. He's wearing shants.

They're those metal guys shorts that hit you like right mid-shin. Yeah, they're not flattering on anybody. They're clam diggers. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, he's great of this movie, did a lot of like 70s exploitation films and like women's prisons films that were shot in vanilla and stuff. That's why I know him from the book Joe Bob goes to the drive-in. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he gets a lot of shout-outs in there. I think his most, like, besides this movie, his most famous movie is probably switchblain. switchblade sister which Quinn Tarantino like re-release on his label like DNA label it's a really fun movie if you're into weird girl gang exploitation movies yeah probably gonna not be okay so then this convertible pulls up

outside and this like super bitchy white lady gets out oh that's Carol Omar yeah she's so good she's such a bitch like I normally avoid using the word bitch in my life and on this podcast, but she is such a bitch! You've seen House on Hunted Hill? Yes. She's so good in that too. It's just... She was apparently supposed to be the next Marilyn Monroe, but because she was like no one could identify with her because she was just shitty in all of her roles. She's very cold. She's like th. She's like th. She's like th. She's like th. She's like th. She's like th. She's like th. She's like th. She's like th. She's like th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. th. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. that's th. th. th. th. th. She's very cold. Very detached. I love her. I think she's fantastic. Yeah. So she is the aunt of these children people, as I'm going to probably refer to them.

Shadults. Shadults. And she's there with her brother Peter, who's like, hey, oh, shucks. Yeah, guy. And he's actually the guy we see at the the guy the guy the guy the guy we see the guy we see the guy we see the guy we see the guy we see the guy we see the guy we see to see to see at to see at to see at we see at the beginning, speaking to camera for no reason. They are there to sue them, seemingly. He's like, not nice to drop in on someone you're going to sue, I guess. I don't know. They want to claim to the family's fortune. Yeah, I guess. I mean, that house does not denote family fortune.

No. It is not in good repair. But we later find out that it that it that it that it that it that it that it that it that it that it that it that it that it that it that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that that that it was that that that that that that to that that to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to out that it was a massive estate. Yes, we do. So they meet up with their lawyer, who is the tiniest man I have ever seen. And he's got the best name for a lawyer, schlocker. Oh, it's just so anti-sidic. And he's got a little Hitler mustache. It's very upsetting. So it's just like all these weird and yeah, it's tiny, he's teeny tiny, like, everyone dwarfs him.

They go to the house and they're like, hey, we're gonna have dinner here, we're gonna eat your food, and then we're gonna sleep here. No, maybe that's Dick. Maybe don't do that. The kids are on their best behavior. The they're, the shuddults are being very well behaved. I really appreciate I really love how Lanchini Jr. interacts with them like it seems very genuinely loving of these children. It's grandfatherly yeah like every time they say like I hate that he's like children I've told you about hate there's no reason to hate

and I'm like that's a really good message for kids you know who it's not sticking with Elizabeth because she fucking to their? Yeah to their. to the. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their. their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's. It's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. It's. It's. It's. It's their their their their tte. It's tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttte. them as well. He's just like what their kid just be nice to them Yeah, and Emily is not very nice to them. Yeah, they're like serving food and she refuses to eat any of it and then Well, let's talk about the food they're serving Rabbit. It's not rabbit. It's the cat that he caught. Oh, it was very blurry on YouTube. I wonder. to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. that's that's that's that's that's th. that's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. thee. the the the the the the the the the the the the the theeeeeeeeeeea. the. on YouTube. I wondered what happened to that cat. It all makes sense now. You know, I'd still eat it, though, if you're a guest. Yeah, well, they're vegetarian, so they did, they were very happy to get meat. Yeah, that doesn't make any sense. I feel like this movie was an anti-vegetarian propaganda. Yeah,er, the lawyer, has also, I didn't write it, has brought his secretary, Miss Morris. Yeah, Anne.

And I had actually noticed that there was a closed captioning function on YouTube, and I couldn't quite understand, so I put on closed captioning in the scene where he says, and this is my secretary, Miss Morris. And on the close captioning, it just said, this is my sexy lady, Miss Moes, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I th.. And, and I th. And, and I th. And, and I th. And, and I th. And, and I had th. And, and I had th. And, and I had th. And, and I had th. And, and I had th. And, and I had th. And, and I had th. And, and I th.'s, and I was like, fuck you, YouTube, of course you would say that. Of course you would say that. Or something like that. It definitely said sex lady. The way he hits Secretary, it sounded like sex-retary. Like, it was like, it was like, well, it was blur in lines.

YouTube was very confused by it also. And she's cool. She's hilarious. She loves to thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, definitely, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. It's definitely thi. It's definitely thi would like to have her as a guest on the podcast. Yeah. Peter also likes her. He's trying to, you know. Immediately they're ready for the bones. Yeah, just checked in.

They punch in their bone zone time cards. They're ready to go. So she does not want to stay there. And then it's made of paper too. Yeah, I mean, I guess one of the bedrooms had their dead father in it. Yeah. The skeleton wearing a nightcap to keep his head warm. So yeah, the dead skeleton is in the one room.

Grinning. Well, yeah, she's in. He's stoked to be to be there. And we're in a hairpiece. Happy to be, was it a hairpiece? I thought it was a nightcap. Happy to be part of the conversation. The next time I have just says casual, Ralph, but I don't know what that means. Maybe he was wearing something. Oh, well, then at the dinner scene, there's this nod to Wolfman,

where they're like, they're talking about them staying the night and how like dark it is, I think. Yeah. And then he launched he just goes, there'll be a full moon tonight. And it was like, oh just think that's the ultimate man, a wild man. And I was like, your dating life must be so weird.

I can imagine if Wolfman is like you're on Tinder and you're just flip, flip, oh, Wolfman, swipe that. Like, what is your life? I don't know, with this, uh, with the lumber sexuals that are going on right now. She's probably have a pretty cool dime on Tinder. That's probably true. I love the idea of 1968 Tinder. Is that a catalog? I guess no.

It's like this year's catalog. Everyone's wearing weird pajamas. Oh man. So Peter takes Miss Morris to the inn, I guess. their takes Miss Morris to the inn, I guess, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, ta, ta, the, the, the, is, is, is, is. the, is. the, is. the, is. the, is. the, is. the, is. the, is. the, is. ta, is. ta, is. ta, is. ta, is. tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. today. today. today, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. today, to go to the inn in town. First they're going to go get drunk. Yeah, first they go get totally drunk and then they drive around on their car. Ninety-six8! It's like, I mean, Peter is obviously the protagonist of this story. He's like a good guy, he doesn't want to fuck anybody over anybody over.

He's sort of going to to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go toto these people and he's trying to get other people to be nice to them and he really likes and, and then he just drives his car so drunk. So, so we're responsibly drunk. He's like, oh boy, look at that. Yeah, when they're having just this drunk conversation. Yeah, it's true. So back at the house the house the house the house the house the house the house the house the house the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. the. they're, the. th. th. they're, they're, th. they're, they're, th. th. they're, they're, their, their, their, their, their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thr. thr. t. t. true. true. true. th. th. thr. thr. It's, thr. It's, thr. It's, guess. Drunk time. Drunk time, yeah. This was Madman's time. Yeah, it's true. So back at the house, Mr. Schlocker, the lawyer, seems convinced that something is wrong, but there's like no cause for him to think that. He and Emily are both like, she's like, this is the biggest phony act I've ever that they were like searching for in the house?

I think you're just to assume that those two are going to look for whatever they can to get the house to get to fuck this family over. Which they get? Yeah. Unfortunately, they're dead. Spoiler alert. Wait, wait. First we have to talk about how Emily spins around her under the time. Who was she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she to to to to to to to to to to th. to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi, thi. to to to thi. tho, tho, tho. tho. tho. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. the. the. thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I the. I thoo. I to to tho. real time. Who was she doing that for?

Other than me? I mean, she's literally, like, they show her spinning in her underwear, like trying on like clothes she finds in the closet I guess, but just see-through clothes. Not real close. I think this is Jack Hill testing out exploitation cinema and just being like, well, people love tits and s. Yeah, so she does that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi tho tho Yeah. There you are. Yeah. So she does that, and then it cuts away and a bunch of other things happen.

This is when we see them in the car. This is when all those other stuff happens. We find out there's no hotels. They have to go back and see it at the house. All think so. Which, we don't really know what's going on yet, we just know that they're down there and they're weird. Well, they're they're pre-prenatal now. They're brought up earlier and Bruno, Lanchin Jr. says, No, they're definitely not dead.

Like, nothing else, no other descriptor of what's going on with them. Well I guess it's hard to describe people people people people people people people people people people people people the description their people their thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus's going on with them. Well I guess it's hard to describe people as pre-prenatal. People don't understand that. People won't get that. Because it isn't a thing. Nope. And it does not mean cannibal. So Emily looks out the window and sees Ralph just hanging upside down like a vampire bat. It's super creepy and it's super good and she screams and runs out of the the house Yeah, and then the girls chase her. Yeah and then and then Ralph continues to chase her. Yeah and she runs out of the house. Yeah, in her under pants. And the girls are chasing her with knives? Well yeah, Virginia always has her her trusty knives. Yeah. So they're chasing her outside and Ralph I guess gets her first. Is first? Is he? Did they?

Is he? Is he? What? What? What happened? What did she say? So Ralph gets her first? In the Wikipedia page.

It does say, after being chased and raped by Ralph. Oh, cool. That's what I was getting up. It says Emily becomes sexually aggressive and murderous. She does get up and freak the fuck out. Yeah. But there's a weird scene of like Ralph gets to her first and then Virginia like comes upon them and she goes, hey Liz! And then the scene cuts? Which is weird. Yeah. Well, the first time I saw this movie it was on the Pittsburghers will know the it's a live program. Yeah, so good. I don't think it's still. the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. S. S. their. S. S. S. their. S. S. their. S. S. S. S. their. S. S. their s. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S............................................................... I. I.. the. I. I. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the... Live program. Yeah, so good. I don't think it's still on the air. I think you have to watch it on the internet now if you want to watch it.

Oh, they're still on the internet. They're on the internet still, yeah. We'll put a link to them on our stuff. I really loved that too. Yeah, I used to love to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch the same to watch to watch to watch the same I used to be a much heavier drinker and I was definitely drunk the first time I watched this movie, which on It's Alive, and I think it was a little edited for TV because when I was reading the synopsis and they were like rape and I was like, huh? Yeah, what rape now? But it's not really, there's nothing on screen that happens. That's why I couldn't, I wasn't sure if he was that, that was, that, that, that was, that, that, that, that, that, that, that was, that, that, that, that was, that was, that was, that was, that was, thated, thated, themed, themed, themed, themed, themed, themed, themed, themed, that, thi, thi, th... th. th. thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, th........ th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It was a th. It was a little, th. It was a little, the. It was a little, theeeated, was, theeeeated, was, thean, was, theeeeated, was, theated, theated, theated, theated, th they just watched it, seemingly, his sisters.

Hey, Liz, she wakes up and she's like crazed. Of course, she just went through a horrific, horrific thing in this horror comedy movie. Yeah, horror comedy. There's another thing that I liked, it was sort of Wolf Manny, which was Elizabeth and Virginia are talking about what to do, and Elizabeth is like, we'll have to make a plan. And then the light hits her all of a sudden, and it just goes, oh, ooh. Yeah.

Like, what is very subtle, guys? Very good. Very good. Very good. Well, there's the scene? Wolfman, Wolfman, hey, this guy. I think if I was on the set with Long Cheney Jr. that's all I would do is talk about Wolfman. Hey, hey, Bruno.

Hey, Brun, what do you? You're a friend? You're a wolf. You're, I'm sorry. gone downhill and he needs to leave and take care of business. He leaves. Well he gets an idea on what to do to take care of the family. Earlier in the film when Bruno is bringing Schlocker and his assistant to the house because he's a chauffeur. Yeah. Shofer for everyone. I think that's called a taxi cap driver. Yeah. So they have to wait on the road because there's blasting going on nearby. They're putting in a new highway. There's blasting going on. So this is Chekhov's dynamite all screen.

Yeah, it really is. So Bruno realizes that he has to leave and go get dynamite. Yeah. He's gone quite a while, because all of the stuff happens that we just described while he's gone. Right. And he basically, like, these people want to take to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their to be theirbueuillain the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tooomomomombite the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. the the the the o' the the o'e the the the the the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theoomber.oomber. tooomber. tooombseufeufe. tooomeufe. tooom take over the estate, but they say they're going to be the legal guardians of the children. Right, and they're not going to give them the care they need. They're going to put them in a home.

To be fair, I'm not sure that Bruno's giving them the care they need. He stopped him for being cannibals up to this point. Pre-Pri-Post-pre-Poprenatal? Oh my god, Popery-Natal? Oh wow. Everything has gone wrong. Justin Gray, Popery Natal. Take care of it. Oh, for Justin. We have this terrible idea.

Can you make it real for us? Guys, make sure you go onto our Instagram thing. the Instagram thing. Yeah, it's an Instagram. PAP-EPSTagram. I need you to look at a couple things for me. Sam Elliot's Dick. Sorry about that, by the way. Sam Elliot's Sidepipe. The poster art that Justin made for, I get in your grave.

I'm still working on the script. The sticker design that he did for, uh, I do what I want, when I want, dig it or fuck off. Yeah. And those that have been sent off to be, stickers are being made. Yeah, printing right now. Gonna be hud off the press soon. And then we'll just hold on to them like we've done with the pins. Gene, I'm gonna get it to you. It's in my purse. I just need to put another never going to deliver on. She's like not paying our bills. If Lipson wasn't taking money from my

account every month, this podcast would be over. So Bruno has left, all this shit is going on. Emily runs back in the house. At this point they've taken Miss Morris captive. No, maybe not yet. Well Peter and and Miss Morris have come back. Sorry I keep calling her Miss Morris by her proper name. We're much more familiar. And Peter has agreed to play a game of spider with Virginia not knowing obviously what a game of spider entails. Peter's kind of dumb. Aw, he's just a good-hearted.

Which leads to him being tied up and then a little bit like kind of like gross sexual situation arises. To which he is very, he's not, he's not down. He's not down, which I was stoked. He's not down. He's a little bit down, but it was the 60s. I don't think he's down. There was a, like, she asked. Okay, so he gets tied up by so, Virginia asks Peter if he likes Miss Morris. And he says, yeah, I do like.

Because they were totally trying to make gal and then they got cocked, by Elizabeth, yeah. And so, Virginia says, well, do you like me? And then sits on his lap and lifts her skirt up and it's like, yeah, I do. I like you. And then like, he's just like staring. to to to to to to to to to to to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, do. I like you. And then like he's just like staring off to the side and not engaging, which I was proud of. I thought I was really stoked on for that. An odd thing was that they were kind of like sexy nightgowns. Sure. I mean, why? Where did Bruno get those and why? I don't. I don't like that. Again, I think we're burgeoning exploitation cinemars. Yeah, I guess. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she's th. And th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. thi. And thi. tho. tho. tho. tho. And tho. And tho. And tho. And tho. And tho. And tho. And th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they were th. they were they were the. the. they were the. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. the. they but then we're back to the regular movie. Which is stabbing. Stabbing. She's gonna stab him. Ralph has abducted Miss Morris at this point.

Oh yeah, and you keep seeing her into the dumbwaiter. Going up and down in a dumbwaiter, which is really, I guess maybe that's the comedy? Ralph fights a dumbwa. It's funny at points, like it's happening right behind Peter's back. Ralph comes like cruising down on the dumb waiter with his hand over Anne's mouth. Right. So they take her to the basement where the relatives are. Right, the aunt and uncle and another person. Yeah. There's a third.

They just don't mention that person. I don't know what the plan is at this point. I don't know that there is a plan other than Peter realizes that Anne's been abducted and that he needs to get out of the situation he's in because he's completely tied up and he's like trying to bang his way out of the chair like knocking himself around and goes down the shoot. Does he? Yeah, he falls into the basement. Okay, yeah, I don't know if that's a, I'm a, the. the. the the the. the the. the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. the the th. th. th. th. the situation. the situation the situation the situation the situation the situation he's he. he. he's he's he's he's he's he's he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he is he is he is he is he is he's the situation thi. he's thi. he's thi. he's he's thi. he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's hethe aunt and uncle, but she totally does. Yeah, I feel very confused by this. It gets a little blurry. She, well, I don't know if that was YouTube or my own personal. Blurring.

I think she might run down the stairs to attack Ralph? Yeah, yeah, she's like a murderous rage. Yeah, okay. She's in the basement. Like, yeah, they've already fed schlocker to the aunt and the uncle. They killed him and fed him. He got spitered. Yeah. Because he finds the ear from Mantan Morland earlier. Yeah, it gets really bonkers.

I know that I fall apart during these movies every time. This one is especially like hairy. It's just like a really chaotic scene and then it kind of ends. the thatter. the the the the theyter. It's, it's, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they, because, they. they. they. they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, ta. Yeah, ta. Yeah, ta. ta. ta. ta. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. tea. tea.a. Right. How does Peter get away? Well Peter, he's banging around in the chair and he falls down the dumbwaiter shoot and hits the floor and then like breaks the chair so he's able to get out. Sure, naturally. And while he's doing that Bruno is trying to light the dynamite that he's brought back to the house to blow up the entire family and to get out. Yeah. So he grabs Anne and they run out. I think the insinuation is that Ralph's head his way with Anne as well,

because she's a little to shell. Yeah, it's pretty gross. It's just grosser back then. That's probably why she's just drinking in the later scenes. She's all liquor to. house and the house is blowed up by the dynamite and it's fun. He has this speech about how like even if they get rid of these Mr. Schlockers there's always going to be other Mr. Schlockers that are better but I don't know that that's true because he's the last of the line or Peter's the last of the line you know maybe they could have just kept going going. Someone's always going to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the to be the the to be the the the the the the the thus. I thus. I thus. I the the the thus. I thock with the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be their their their there. there. I thrue. Someone. thrue. thrue. thrue. thrue. thrue. there's there's always always always always throooooooooooooooo. there there there there Bruno's a little sad too at this point. He's just, he's had a hard life. Yeah. This was autobiographical with this book.

Oh boy. So then we cut to Peter closing the book that he's been reading, which is a rare disease book, where he was reading about Mary's syndrome and explaining that he's the last surviving error. And then everything's cool. He got the money. He married Anne. They had th. th.. The line is done. He's far enough removed. He's like, luckily my family was far enough that none of us have married disease. Right. Well, fuck you. And then they show his daughter wandering around and going to the back yard and then getting a real vacant look and then... She looks at a spider? Okay, because a spider thing seemed a little like oddly tacked on in this movie. Do you know what I mean? th. the th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. the th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Like, th. th. Like, th. Like, the the th. L. L. L. L. L. the the th. the thi. the thi. L. the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. the the the thi. the thi. thi. thi. thi a little bit like oddly tacked on in this movie. Do you know what I mean? Like, well it was just Virginia's thing.

Yeah. I mean, she was Spider Baby, like. Yeah, I don't know. It was a kind of an odd, like, she kept focusing on these spiders. I don't know. It was, I took focusing on these spiders. It was. It was a fun movie though. It was. I enjoyed it.

It's also like 75 minutes long. It's 81 minutes long. Yeah, you're in and out. It's really nice. In and out, yeah. It's really nice. Well, I mean, I think anything longer than that, it would eventually just become a punishing movie.

Yeah. a an 81 minute long movie I think that there's nothing to do like I have to I have to take an app yeah I probably have to wash them dishes Lawrence of Arabia has its place but I don't need every movie to be like I think it's one of my big problems with these like Marvel action movies like I don't need a three-hour long fucking action I can even I have to go to the the bathroom yeah yeah a lot yeah a lot because I'm I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a th I'm th I'm a th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I tha tha tha that that that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to. Do you want to go to the... Ratings! I'm excited! Rating face. I like this okay.

Yeah. I didn't love it. I didn't hate it. Yeah. It was fine. Would I tell other people to watch it? Yeah. Six and a half.

Six. 0.5. 6.5. It was really creepy.. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. the to. to. to. to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. to. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the half. Six and a half. Seven, six and a half, six point seven five. It was really creepy and it was really interesting concept. Yeah. But there were parts of it that I was just like, muh. It was a rushed movie. I wonder how long it actually took them to make this movie. I'm going to guess three weeks.

I'm going to give it a seven. Okay. It gets a solid point for the theme song along. Oh yeah, I forgot about that. That animation was great. Yeah. I'm not changing my answer. That's fine.

That's a thin song is worth of admission. It's a fun movie. I mean, evidently, if you're drunk when you about it, you're going to enjoy it that much more. Yeah. But no, it's a fine movie. I totally recommend it to people. It's like pure 60s weirdness, like that sort of Roger Corman's school of movie making and it's just bonkers. It seems like everything is done in like one take. Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah, there's not a lot of going back. It's really great to see Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid Sid to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see Sid to see Sid to see Sid to see Sid to see to see to see to see Lon Cheney Jr. just doing his thing and I love that dude. Yeah, I can tell. I love a sad story so I really love that dude. Yeah, it's fun. It's fun.

It's fun to see Jack Hill doing a horror movie like this rather than just like a straight exploitation movie like he's doing. Yeah, I would say it. Plus it's free. Yeah, plus it's free. Yeah, or $299 or $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $99, $ $ $ $99, $99, $99. to $99. to $1. to $1. to $1. to $1. thi $ $1. tho $1. tho $1. that's $1. that's $ $ $ $1. that's $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $1.00, $1.00, $1.00, $1.00, $1.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00. It's $2.99 or $40 or whatever you want to spend. It's a donation only. This is like a radio head record. It's a sliding scale. So what are we doing next week? We're gonna do a remake, which we don't normally like to do, Katie. Well, I don't normally like to do. Paff doesn't like remakes. We're gonna do the movie, we are what we are.

we are, which is based, th, th, which is, which is, which is, th, which is, name I believe. Can you say it in Spanish? We are what we are. That was fucking spectacular. Yeah it's a the director of Steakland I believe if you've seen that movie. Oh that movie's great. I love that movie steak like STEAK? Nope. Don't know it then. I think that's a section of Golden Corral. I really hate myself. I don't know what Golden Corral is? You know what Golden Corral is? It's a weird buffet place. I don't know much about Buffets. God, you gotta engage yourself some Buffets. I'm a vegetarian, there's nothing at Buffets for me.

Especially not in one called Steakland. So yeah, we're going to do that. So yeah, we're going are looking for that Harry and the Henderson's disc, I've had it since 2012. I'm sorry. I would like to cancel the disc part, but I don't know where that one is. Paying so much for Netflix. I just want to watch Harry and the the Henderson's. I don't know. So yeah, that's what we're going to watch next. So, the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thiol-I's thiol-I's thi. thi. thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's the. I's the. the. t t t t t t t tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I'm t t t t are so check that out at the more recent movie and I yeah I think you guys don't like it all right cool so you can find us on Facebook we are where will of ambulance two-waleance Instagram thing where will fambulant Instagram tumbler we've a gmail address oh no I'm just gonna go to tumble tombl wee was that is that a tumbleweed? I think I see a tumbleweed.

There's only porn here. Thanks so much to everyone who's been hyping us up. It's crazy. You guys are killing it. Yeah. You guys are killing it. You guys are amazing. Together we're going to get through this guys. Like, because this is dental work. This is basically dental work. No dentist. No dentist. Oh, we should do the dentist some dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dentist dental work. No dentist, no dentist, no dentist. Oh, we should do the dentist sometime with the...

It's not Corbyn-Burnsin, is it? No. Oh, I don't know. Ah, shit. We should do Roar as well. Rour's that movie where they filmed it in the 70s at our actual lion preserve, and people got like the thathea saw it on cable when I was a kid and it really upset me. I just got over my phobia of dentist. All right, well, whatever.

There's movies you would like to see us do? Give us heads up. Yeah. We keep a list of them. We're terrible keeping a list. We have lists in various places, I think. We need to, uh, consolidate. Yeah. Also, sometimes I look at this list and I'm like, hell no. But I do appreciate the suggestions. Yeah, we love you guys.

Yeah, you guys are the best. Thanks for being the best. Thanks for listening to another episode of Where Will Family? Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.