Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 454- From Beyond (1986)

Episode Date: November 27, 2023

In this week's episode, we're headed back to one of Allen's favorite years, 1986, with the Stuart Gordon film "From Beyond." Special topics for your consideration include: a whole lot of questions and... very few answers. I mean really and truly, very few.  1986, baby! We've covered so many films from this year and here are a few of my favorites-- Episode 35- "Neon Maniacs," Episode 103- "The Fly," Episode 174- "Chopping Mall," Episode 199- "Terrorvision (THE LIVE SHOW)," Episode 213: "Poltergeist II: The Other Side," and Episode 375- "Rawhead Rex." The regular lineup of links! You can support us at patreon.com/werewolfambulance and listen to all of our action movie episodes! This month is the DMX/Jet Li 'movie' "Cradle 2 the Grave."  leave us a message at 412-407-7025 hang out with some cool listeners at https://discord.gg/DutFjx3cBD  buy merch at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance the best place to reach us is at werewolfambulance@gmail.com we're on Reddit at r/werewolfambulance sorta on Twitter @werebulance sorta on Instagram @werewolfambulance www.werewolfambulance.com if you feel you really must lodge a complaint with us, please do it on Facebook at facebook.com/werewolfambulance because we are probably not gonna see that, ever.   If you liked this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen! It helps others find us and allows us to continue to grow.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 What do you have to say for yourself? I'm sorry. What do you have to say for yourself? I'm sorry. So sorry. We're going to get in trouble for that. That's definitely trademarked. Oh, isn't? Oh, I'm sure.
Starting point is 00:00:28 Distinctly, distinctly recall you saying, I don't think there's any weird sexual assaulty stuff in this. Yeah. What? When's the last time you saw this movie? Apparently I have sexual assault blindness when it comes to Stuart Gordon movies. I think we need to talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to their they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they, they, they, they, they, they, they. the the they. the they. tho, the. the. theateateateateateate. tr. truee. true. true. toooooooo. too. too. to me me so movies. I think we need to talk about how Stewart Gordon loves weird old man scientists sexually assaulting beautiful young women. Specifically Barbara Grampton. I mean in the pantheon of the assaults the Stuart Gordon has done to Barbara Grampton. This is a little lower, lower down. This is also a Charles Band film.
Starting point is 00:01:05 Yeah, your boy. I mean, high eyes low lows with C Band here. And the music is by Dickie Band, so you get the whole band clan back together. That's right. First note, watching this with ads to my chagrin. I was watching it on my laptop and I realized that I could bump the ads up to like five speed, five times the speed. Yeah, it was pretty great. Wow. Yeah. What were you watching the movie at? Free v? No, no, what speed
Starting point is 00:01:34 were you watching the movie? Oh, 1.4. I had to do it this morning. I don't think I missed much. I don't thi thi thi th th th th th thin thin the the the the the thin the the the the to the to the to the the to the the the the to do it the the the their their their to do. I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the a the the their tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. tip. tipe. tipe. tipe. tipe. tipe. I. I. I tipe. I tipe. I tip. I the kids say. I slowed it down to see Ken Forrey's penis and that was red wet shorts. Oh Ken Foray. So this movie starts off, oh we're doing a from beyond by Stuart Gordon. Based on H.P. Lovecraft which should be in the elusive of quote books. I have not read from, but this has I mean the it feels plausibly Lovecraft, Ian. So the thing with the resonator that allows you to see the monsters that lurk in our world that we cannot see is the story. Okay. Pretty much the entirety of the story. There's not much to the story. Okay. But like it's a creepy idea. Sure. Like that you could th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. the story, there's not much to the story. Okay. But like it's a creepy idea. Sure. Like that you could suddenly see things that are around you all the time that then bite you in the face. Salamanders?
Starting point is 00:02:30 Fly and eels? Yeah. A little jellyfish? A little jellyfish? A little. Yeah. But, they and pain shit. At one point I was just like, fuck you, Penhead. Get out of here with that. It's definitely Heck Razor. Heck Razor, yeah. It's kind of like, what if I just like
Starting point is 00:02:52 jay-oed in the corner when I beat myself? I love that that's the dumbed down version of El Racer for you, flagelating while jerking off in the corner of your own bedroom. In the most like low-stake sex dungeon I've ever seen. Yep, it's just a towel on the floor and a cat of nine tails. Oh boy. With Garfield's face on it. Oh my god, yes. On the handle?
Starting point is 00:03:21 On the handle, yeah. Does he look disapproving? Oh yeah. Okay. It says, I hate Mondays and this. So Jeffrey Combs is doing computer. Oh my god, the 1986 version of high tech is so fucking funny. It's a cardboard box with a switch on it. So many more switches than there are now. Yeah, it's true. So we see he gets the tuning for tuning for tuning for tuning tuning tuning for tuning for the tuning for tuning for tuning the tuning for tuning for the tuning for tuning for the tuning for tuning for tuns tunx the tunx the tunks tuns tunin. the tunks. tun. tun. thea. thea. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tunnene. tuning. tuning. tuning. tuning. tuning. tuning. tuning. tuning. tunin. tunn. tunn. tunn. tunn. tunn. tunn. tunn. tunn. tunn. tunn. the. the. te. So we see he gets the tuning forks to make some beautiful colors, the most mysterious of all colors. Purple. Purple. Making an orb, the most mysterious
Starting point is 00:03:50 of shapes. Orbs. And he can now see these creatures which I just dubbed skin eels. Yeah, he creates the orb, the orb creates wind and a salamander, a biting salamander. And he goes and finds his co-worker, Dr. Edward Pretorius. Who is giving full-on like letch vibes just from the job? I don't know if it's his chest hair. Yeah, it's his chest hair. It's his chest hair.
Starting point is 00:04:15 Okay. He opens the door and you're like, uh, uh, I don't know. I don't know. And Jeffrey Cohn is like, oh my god, it's happening. And the guy's like, oh, is it? Oh, we gotta do this? So Crawford, who is Jeffrey Combs. Yes. His.
Starting point is 00:04:35 Crawford, tilling castes. I'm not going to say that a single time. Crawford, yeah. He, this thing seems to give him a headache. Yeah. But it gives Pretorius like a full-on orgasm right there in front of his friend. Okay. Crawford yells, shut it off and he goes, Nub-a! Which I liked quite a bit. There's so much more I want to see more, more than any man has ever seen, which gave me real like, I thought about like, nah, I don't want that...... th th th. th th th th th th th th th this. this. this this this th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thus th th thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus th. th. th. thor's th. thor's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi the the the the the the to the the the theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the the the the the the to to see more, more than any man has ever seen, which gave me real like, I thought about like, nah, I don't want that.
Starting point is 00:05:07 I wouldn't add this interest to me not at all. But I'm real like, I'd like to boldly go where no man has gone before, but I'll probably just stay in Pittsburgh. Well, what if that place you could boldly go was just a pervert town. Pervert and also just like goopy man. So much goop. Oh my god. So the windows blow out. Don't worry, they'll blow out a few more times. Yeah, they keep replacing those. I don't know who's doing it. Who's in charge of this? Pretorius? It's his house. I guess he's got just like a standing order with a window repairman. We do see a sign a sign a sign the sign th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th is th is th is th is th. Yeah thi. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. thi thi. thi. thoer. thoer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I tho. Yeah. I tho. I tho. He's the the the the th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. I's. I's. th. th. I th. th. It's. th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. sign later that it's the Pretorius Foundation, so perhaps he has a maintenance person.
Starting point is 00:05:48 And it also looks like the House of Seven Gables. Yeah, it's not very cozy or something, as Ken Foray says later. And surprisingly, there are neighbors close enough to be Nebby. Yes, there are many neighbors as we see later, but we first meet this woman who is meant to be like, oh, she's such a pain in the ass, she's always calling the cops. But like, they're being really fucking loud and doing something weird up there.
Starting point is 00:06:15 So she goes over there with her dog Bunny. Yeah, which is funny because her real name is money. The actor? Oh, I love that. But I also just love the idea of naming any animal after another animal that it is not. Her name is bunny summers. Like having a puppy named kitty cat. I never even thought about that that a bunny is a thing. Yeah. Yeah. It's a different animal. Bird, get over here. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:39 I do know a dog named Birdie. Our friend, our mutual friend has a dog named Birdie. Yeah. Yeah. Well, there you go. I have a dog named a Drew Fruit. This is all coming together. What, Miller Light? Miller Time, you're gonna name the Miller Time.
Starting point is 00:06:53 Yeah. They throw that dog out the window. I feel like we've had in defense of the Friday, the 13th movie, that dog jumped up. Okay, that's right. Somebody did throw that dog on the window, like, in the making, in the production. Oh my god, their address is 666 Pretoria Street. Benevolence Street, which is what? What? What? I don't get this at all. There's an axe through the door at the woman, the neighbor. Yeah, seemingly just to open the door. Yeah, and Crawford comes running out. The cops are now there and they just arrest him for not for running out of his home.
Starting point is 00:07:38 He's got that vibe though. He does he? So, uh, a side note, quick diversion. There was a, this must have just been a hotel or something, or a bed breakfast? Moteldean. Moladian. It's a place where you go to raves. Because like, the interior decor was just like a betty Ross flag and then like a children's
Starting point is 00:07:55 don't tread on me flag. Yeah, that was a children's don't? It looked like a child adronic. I've never seen that design for a don't tread on me. No. But it was really amusing myself by imagining a 90s pop punk guy saying don't tread on me, but saying don't tread on me. Where are you from? You know they can't pronounce me for some reason. May! May! It's gonna be me. Wow, that's even pop. Yeah, so he gets arrested.
Starting point is 00:08:32 And we see Bunny the Dog eating the severed neck of Dr. Bratory. Yes, she's licking a twisted stump of a neck, which is good. Yeah, looks great. Opening credits. Which are just set over high contrast maggots. Yeah, oh maggots. Yeah, all right. So we we come back into the story already in progress. We meet Barbara Crampton. Yeah, she's a psychiatrist. Dr. Barbara Crampton. Dr. Barbara Grampton. And she meets Dr. Enemy. I don't know what that lady's name is. Doesn't matter. She has a ridiculous name. Dr. Block. Dr. Block. Richard Block. Yes. They're doing a sick Dr. Burns at each other. It's so stupid. And so this is at a facility for people who have schizophrenia.
Starting point is 00:09:25 Sure. And they are disagreeing on how schizophrenia should be treated. Barbara Crampton's walking around looking in the window. Yeah, just window shopping for crazy people. But also acting very uncomfortable for someone who supposedly has a way to work with mental patients that's better than this. Yes! Yes! She's, yes. yes. I will say this movie I think had, this is in 1986, what was it, 1989 for Silence of the Lambs? Something like that? Yeah, about that. Yeah, so they, you know, this movie has a dude masturbating in a cell
Starting point is 00:10:01 just like Silence of the Lambs. Pretty sure Science the Lambs ripped off this movie. Probably. Yeah, I think there's some some, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, th, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie, this movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie, this movie movie, this movie, the movie movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, Pretty sure the Sons of the Lambs ripped off this movie. Probably. Yeah, I think there's some strong from Beyond references. Silence of the Lambs as a remake of From Beyond. H.P. Lovecraft's All to the Lans. Well, he does have to wear that thing over his face that kind of looks like a bitey jellyfish. Know what I'm saying? Like two? They're trying to figure out if Crawford can stand trial for murder. Yeah. Because somehow they're going to try to prove to a jury of his peers
Starting point is 00:10:33 that he murdered Dr. Pretorius with his swirly neck. By twist his head, clean off. I guess so. He's not that buff. No one is. She. She. She. She. She loved your writings when you were working at Miss Catonic University. Yeah, Miss Catonic University. And then he says that they've been working on a thing to stimulate the pineal gland. Right. Which has always made me chuckle because I'm a child and it's real close to penis. Pineal. Yeah. And he's like, something about the terrifying creatures that came out and they bit off crop or uh, Pretorius' head, like a gingerbread man.
Starting point is 00:11:16 Like a gingerbread man. Yeah, he says he destroyed the resonator because it came. And she says, what came? And he doesn't answer. And I was like what Dr. Pretorius came? Turns out he did not. Yeah, so so Barbara Cramden says to Dr. Enemy, let's do a cat scan on him and Dr. Enemy goes why? I don't know because you're a fucking doctor maybe and you have a machine right there apparently to do it. Fine but I'm going to smoke entire time we're doing the Gatscan. I mean, how cool is she? And they find out that his by Neo-Gland is growing. Right. And it's somebody's like, well, isn't that, like, doesn't that stimulate your sex drive or and or something? Mm-hmm. What if your brain had a dick? I think most men's do? Oh, that thin. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. they're they're they're they're they're they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they're. they're their. their. their. thi. thi. thi. thin. thi. thin. thi. thin. theeateat thi. thi. thi. thi. their thi. thi. they're they're's do. Because when that thing comes out of their forehead, it's definitely
Starting point is 00:12:05 a penis, right? Yeah. Oh yeah. On Do P. So, her grand idea, Dr. Barbara Crafton. She's a dummy. I love the, the outfit they put her in is just like, well, she's just gonna take those glasses off and shake out her ponytail, right? Like, that's just gonna happen at some point. I love her glasses, and yes. Her glasses are so 80% of her cheek can read. They're so big. Yeah. So she is going to take him back to Pretorius' house.
Starting point is 00:12:34 What are they going gonna rebuild the resonator. They're gonna redo the experiment. What? Yeah. She believes in the resonator but I do not know why. I think she just wants to be horny. Yeah, maybe. She saw that big pineal gland. It was like, I want a big pineal gland. But she's gonna take with her, a cop. Yeah, she gets assigned a police officer in a van. Bubba. He's like, I used to play pro football. We were all crazy. Cat trunk, right, bites into an apple and then it cut to commercial. And I just sat there like. Dump founded? Why is it? Why is it? Why is it?
Starting point is 00:13:16 the tape? Like, he bites it an orange like that? I've been like, yeah, we obviously are a little crazy. That's how you eat an apple. Like, he bites it for effect. Dramatic apple eating, it's a note I have. Did you get the feeling that the movie just kept playing while the commercials are gone? Yes, I did. I very much did.
Starting point is 00:13:39 Even though I was fast-forwarding him, I'm missing something here. So we're back to the Pretorius house. They're inside and in a foreground Crawford and Bubba are looking at some cables, some power cables that have been like duct tape together. In the background though Barbara Crypton is just running her hand down a wall. Why? Why? Just get the vibes in the house. You do that every time you come to my home, you have to get the vibes. I'm not a medical doctor. She's doing like, what is that, uh, the thing for face off or they do like the face waterfall? Face waterfall? On the wall.
Starting point is 00:14:16 What did you learn from this, Dr. Crampton? Oh, the thoroure has brought, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, to, the, to, th, the, th, the, the, th, the, to to to to, to, the, to, to, to, to, to, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, to, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, the th, the the th, the th, the thi, the the thi, the thi, the the the the thooooo-s, the the the the thooo-s, the medical, thi, thi, thi, thi, okay. Okay. I'm sorry, I have to say this real quick. Can for a try has brought no weights but a weight bar with him? Look, he's got to keep his pump. I, okay, I don't get this scene because they're, he, she's touching the wall. He's looking at the power cable. They say, they turn and say something to each other, and when they turn around, Crawford is gone. Are we meant to believe the lights are off? Oh, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:14:49 Because the lights are on, but they are like, oh, maybe he went to get the circuit breaker or whatever. And I thought, do you mean to tell me this was the dark? in a house who was a foot from you? What? What? Are you okay? I think this is over, this is the end for Alan. The next scene where Ken Vore is just standing in the low-grade sex dungeon? Yeah, it's so punko, it's so cheap. You got all of this at a Daltmart. And yeah, Club Rasket was going out of business
Starting point is 00:15:30 so you were able to pick up a bunch of stuff. So he's just standing there watching porn tape that Dr. Pretorius has made where he's just whipping a woman with her boobs out. Which was very, um, that John Carpenter movie. Which was very, that John Carpenter movie, was the John Carpenter movie? Are you thinking of video drone? Video drum? Yes, not. Those were very similar. Sure, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:56 Well, Kenfore does have a Pittsburgh connection, so yeah. Does he? Well he's in Dawn of the Dead. This movie is stars like Allen Ambulance All-Stars. Because it starts four people. Yeah, and you love all of them. Although I don't know how you feel about chest hair over there. Ted something or other. So he's upstairs watching this Porto and Barbara Grafton comes and he's like, ah, look at this. Pretty wild, huh? Yeah. So he was a BDSM guy because reasons, they go up into the room where the resonator is.
Starting point is 00:16:33 And at that moment, Crawford charges out with the axe. Why did he wait for them to come in to use the axe on the resonator if his goal was to break it? Why does he have to have dramatic effect? I th be wearing the the the the we we we we the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the's theathing theathing theathing theathings the theateateateateathings, theathings, the-s, the-s, the-s, the-s, the-s, the-s, the-s, the... the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeatee, the, the, the resonator if his goal was to break it. Why does he have to have dramatic effect? I don't know, can you have dramatic effect and be wearing a beige sweater at the same time? No, no you may not. There's a chalk outline of Pretorius's body and it just cut off where that should be. And for some reason, it was fucking hilarious to me. Because later when there's one for Ken Foray and they just, they drew a real tiny tiny tiny tine tine tine the tine their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their toe. toe. toe. toe. toeathea. toe. their. toe. toe. too. too. to be to be to be to be to be to be to be their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He's their their their their their their their te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. toe. It's te.ay and they just they drew a real tiny leg where his leg disappeared. It's so funny, but I think it's supposed to be funny. I think Stuart Gordon knew that they're like he knew what he was doing. That does seem funny. Yeah, I mean Baba's character is just, I mean at this point he's like, Baba hungry Baba eat. Okay. And He goes and makes beef stew with dumplings but there's
Starting point is 00:17:25 almost no stew. Yeah, big dumplings, no stew. But also Barbara Crampton has fallen asleep on the job of watching the mental patient. He used to bring beautiful women here but it always ended with screaming. Like was it non-consensual or were you just jealous? We don't ever find out. We don't ever find out. No, no. No.
Starting point is 00:17:50 I have a note that's after I have, hell yeah, beef stew with dumplings. I do love making a satan beef stew with dumplings. Sounds farty. And then followed by don't move into the field of vibration. Yes. They can sense you in the fiefefefefewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewfewen, the f. the f. the f. t. thoomfew, t. to to to to to to to to to to to tooom, tooom, to tooom-a, too, too, too, too, too, to to to to to to to too, we, we, we, we to, we to, we to to to, we to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tou, tou. tou. tou. te, te. te. te. te. te. te. too. too. too. too. too. too, we to field of vibration. They see you if you move, like a fucking tea wrecks. Yeah. Yeah. Sexy T-sex. So they start the machine back up. Yeah. And... Stay still dip shits. They do not stay still. Pretorius calls out to Crawford Tailing Guest. And he's, he comes out of the shadows and he's backlit. And he'sTilling-Gast, and he's he comes out of the shadows, and he's backlit, and he's so her suit, and so wet.
Starting point is 00:18:31 So wet. He's wetter than you would be if you just climbed out of the pool. I don't know how they got him wetter than wet. He's wetter than he would be if he just was birthed by his mother. Yes. He's just covered in like, he's th. th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's the. He's the. He's the. He's theer the' the'er thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer. He's thoer. He's thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer thoer th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's thoer. He's the. He's thoer. He's thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe. He's th Yes. He's just covered in like a viscous liquid. He and he's full nude. He's full nude. He's like, touch me if it pleases you and also here is my penis. And that's what they touch him? And his skin is like Plato.
Starting point is 00:18:59 He's made of Plato and rips his face off and it looks real dukey. But the dukey's turn into snakes, I guess. And then the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. he's thi. he's thi. he's th. th. th. th. he's just just just just. thi. thi. thi's just. th. th. th. th. thus. thi. thi. he's just just just just. thi. thi. He's th. He's th. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. thi. He's. He's. He's. the. the. He's t. He's t. He's t. He's just. t. He's like. He's just. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. He's. He's. He's. He's. of Plato and rips his face off. And it looks real dukey, but the dukey's turned into snakes, I guess, and then his head pops off and blows a load everywhere, and then maybe he's a jellyfish IDK. That was my stream of consciousness. I really love when his face was just like shimmery snakes. I thought that looked great. You mean before they stuck out? No, when they're lying down. When their their their their their their, when, when, when, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, the, the, th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. thi, th. th. th. th. th. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to. to. to. He, to. He, he. He, he. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. to. to. t. t. t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t the the tooooooooooooooooooooooooo. t tt to. t t t t sticking up when they're lying down, it's horrendous. And I generally do like the monster design in this. Like, immediately prior to this, Baba has seen one of the jellyfishes sort of come at him.
Starting point is 00:19:34 Jellyfish? Jellyfish? Plural. Fish is plural. Fish can be plural. Yeah. So just jellyfish. Jellyfish is coming at him and bites him. And I think the like mouth biting bit is really, really good. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I'm on board. I feel like the special effects. I'd like that it's all practical. It looks really nice. Really gross. When the monster later has a huge dumper in tiny legs. It's very funny. Yeah. Ken Foray barfs. But I thought he was barfing blood, but he wasn't. I the st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st st. the st. the st. the st. the st. the st. th. thii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. thi. thi. the thi. the the the the the thi. the th. the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. ti. ti. ti. ti. tipee. tipe. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi.fs. But I thought he was barving blood, but he wasn't.
Starting point is 00:20:05 I think it was soup. It was the stew he ate her later. Yeah, I like that. But Babs is exhilarated. She's making breakfast and she's so pumped. She just fucking wants to fuck. And they're talking about how it affected them. And Crawford's like, I've had a headache all night. And Babs is like, I felt exhilarated.
Starting point is 00:20:26 And Ken Forae goes, well, what about this hard on that I have? What about it, Bubba? Like, is he saying like, whose problem is this? Who's gonna fix this? Like, the opening to a porn film that just never like they can't get the clutch out can't get it started. What about this hard on I have? And hard on is so I don't know boner no problem with it boner is funny because boner's funny. It's funny but hard on just like oh I have to go
Starting point is 00:21:04 shit I'm like so aggressive just say you have to make a boom boom. Go make a boom boom. So that sounds like fucking to me. Oh, we're gonna make boom boom. Oh, I feel like you should own a lot of Betty Boop te shirts if you say that. Yeah, oh, and definitely have a tattoo on my ankle of the boop herself. Or just two cherries on the stem. What is that thing with Betty Boop tattoos? I don't know. What is the deal? Oh no, it's like it's it's like the Taz for ladies. I gotcha. It's a very like, I don't know. I think you just lock into it at some point in your early adolescence and you're just like, I'm a Betty Boop person. Yeah. It's part of my personality. Yeah. What does Betty Boop steal?
Starting point is 00:21:46 What is her personality? I don't know, wasn't she just like cute-headed and sexy? Great, cool. I mean, Taz, at least he's got character. Blah-la-laph. Spits everywhere and can spin really fast. Oh my god. Yeah, he's like, what's up with this heart on? They're like, well, the penial gland can cause sexual stimulation. Total can bodily control on a molecular level.
Starting point is 00:22:08 What? What? What? He's fucking saying? And then she's like non sequiturs into the fact that her father was schizophrenic and she just doesn't want anyone else to go through that. Yeah, I don'ted up for a cure. I have, I mean like, maybe I don't like sci-fi as much as other people do, but like,
Starting point is 00:22:34 I cannot stand these like pseudo-scientific explanations for things. Like, maybe just don't do it at all, you know? Maybe, maybe, maybe this is just bad. Maybe this is just bad. It's like, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, we, but, we, we, we, but, we, we, but, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, but, we, we, we, we, we, we just, we just, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I. I. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I have, th is, th is, th is, th is, th is, th is, th th thi, I mean, I mean, I have, I have, I have, I have, I, I, I, you know? Maybe, maybe, maybe. Maybe this is just bad. Maybe this is just bad. It's just bad, it would be a bad movie. It's a bad movie. A bad, wildly, enjoyably bad movie.
Starting point is 00:22:54 So they're like eating breakfast and they're like, okay, well, I'm going to get some rest now. What have you been doing the rest of the time? Yeah, did Ken for I I I I I I I I I I I I I for I for I I for I for I for I for they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they they're they they they're just just just th. th. th. th. they're just just just they'd just just just this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. We just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just. they they were. We. We just. We just. We just. We just. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did, they're they're they're they're they're th. Did, th. Did, they're they're th. Did they're th. th. they're th. they're they're th. they're they're th. they're th. We're th. they're they're th. We're just just just just just th. the time. Did you, okay, fine. Did Ken Foray just have this hard on hanging out with you all? He must have. It's like bopping it against the table, like, what are we going to do about this? I've never had one of these before. He's going to be so pained up. So yeah, it's night time again. Because she has to have this nightgown on. Right, to show that she's conservative. How would you ever sleep?
Starting point is 00:23:25 You're just wrapped in, what is that, tap-it-up? What is that? Tip to toe. Oh, I don't know. It seems so uncomfortable. But don't worry, because Crawford is sleeping in his Miskotonic university shirt. So cute. So cute. B-cramps goes up and turns this thing on again. Uh-huh. Why, though? Because she, uh...
Starting point is 00:23:46 You just can't jerk it without it now? She just turn on the horny machine. Okay. And she goes in a, you know, slowly sexually assaults Crawford. Yeah, for not, for not the last time. Yeah. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Then Pretoria shows a circle of sexual. in this film. The worst, Elton John song. The circle of sexual assault. Alan said there was none.
Starting point is 00:24:13 I think I was just thinking there's specifically no severed head kind of like a scene in this movie. Great, I mean good. It's a low bar. It's a low bar. Yeah. So there's just making out now. It's a low bar. It's a low bar. So there's just making out now, just making out. Yeah, and then Pretorius shows up and he's got extra bits now. Why are you so goopy, Edward, and why is your body that? And he says, I am more human than human or something.
Starting point is 00:24:41 More human than human. Yeah. Yeah. Oh man. Yeah. Hmm. Now something happened here where he just leaves her there. Right. Well, Pretoria says grabbed her and says he's going to kill her.
Starting point is 00:24:58 Right. So, um, Crawford's like, well, I have to shut the machine off. Got it. So the only way I can do that is going down to the waterfilled basement. Got it. Doy. Doy. This whole movie, like all of the tension in this movie is based around plugging them and then also unplugging them.
Starting point is 00:25:16 And sometimes slipping. Yeah. Sex metaphor. Yeah. Do you ever see that's that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that costume that it's like the woman is an outlet and the man has like a three-pronged dick yeah weird yeah this is weird just be Mario and Luigi like everybody else or in our case Wario and Wallyeji. Oh I have seen the one that's a man with his face covered in red and the woman's pants are covered in red. That's that's man with his face covered in red, and the woman's pants are covered in red. That's tasteless.
Starting point is 00:25:49 Yes, yes, unlike the very taseable outlet costume. That's gosh. Not tasteless, just goauch. So they run into the basement. It's a Crawford and Bubba. Can for it! His little tiny undies, my God, he's so hot. He's a well-put-together human being. He is put together like an action figure. You can see his entire penis when this underwear gets wet.
Starting point is 00:26:15 Have I ever told you, I met both him and Jeffrey Combs the same horror convention. No. Jeffery's very sweet human being. Nice. Not charging people. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to th. th. to thuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu thu thi thuuuuuuuuuuuuu. Hea thu thuu thuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. Hea thuu thu. Hea thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu th. He he he he he he he he thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu. Hea thu. Hea thu. Hea thu. Hea thuuuuuuuu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu Combs's very sweet human being was like taking pictures not charging people for it. It was lovely. Ken Foray wanted to charge money for a picture. Yeah. Which is like fine.
Starting point is 00:26:31 That's how you got to make money. Yeah. He thought that I looked like my ex-wife's father. She's like, oh, you're her father. Oh, no. No, I no, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. thi. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. t t t t t t to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to with that. Yeah, no, 100% yeah. Oh boy, how awkward for Ken Foray. Weird. So that's my Ken Foray story. Great.
Starting point is 00:26:55 So, yeah, so they run into the basement and there's a Dick monster in the basement. Yeah, in the water. In the water, that is like the sandworm from Dune. The effects are cool, but it's just, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, thi, thi, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. tho. thoo. Oh, thooo. Oh, thoooo. Oh, thoo. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, th water. In the water. That is like the sandworm from Dune. The effects are cool but it's just like straight nasty you know everything in this is nasty. So somehow Crawford ends up in the dick mouth? Yeah. Like you do. When he comes out he has a little piquet. No, that's something else. Oh, you're thinking it's docking? Is it talking? Or you thinking of sounding where you put something in the hole? I think I'm thinking of sounding. Docking is like when you stretch the foreskin over someone else's penis, right?
Starting point is 00:27:30 Yeah. Thank you, Simba. I'll take that out. I think he'd be proud. I think he'd be proud. So, yeah, for some reason, the dick the dick the dick the dick some reason the dick removes all of his hair and makes his head too big. Vacumes his head into a different shape and all of his hair is off. And meanwhile, like, Dr. Bratorius has just ripped open Barbara Crampton's top and is assaulting her and getting huge fingers? Yeah. And I'm like, oh, no, what's gonna, oh, okay, thankfully she unplugs the machine before those fingers did anything.
Starting point is 00:28:05 Yeah, except they do grab her boobs, which is really funny because they're hard to control. Bucke the baa. But it's not funny, because also I don't want to watch Barbara Cram to be sexually assaulted. No. No. No. No. Don't worry. She still wants to use the machine. Shit. So, she realizes that the problem with this is that she has to run the test alone. If someone else is here, then it's going to get nasty.
Starting point is 00:28:34 But why? What makes her believe that? I don't know. Okay. Okay. And Ken Forrey says, I've seen this in the streets. I've seen this in the streets. You're acting like a junkie. I've seen this in the streets.
Starting point is 00:28:49 Right, well he's urban, you see, in this film. Fucking A. Yeah. He's also when he delivers this line wearing his own football jersey recreationally, like he packed it and was like, I'm going to wear this on day three. I've already mentioned I'm a footballing. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. I's, this. I's, this. I's, this. I's, this. I's, this. I's, this. I's, this. I's, this. I's, this. I's this. I's this. I's this. I's this. I's this. I's this. I's this. I's this. I's this. this. this. this. this. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I's th. I's th. I's gonna wear this on day three. I've already mentioned I'm a footballman. They're gonna later, they're like, oh my God, you were a footballman. It was his jersey, it had his name on it. Bubba.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Boba. So she's in the room with the bondage business. Realizing she might be into BDSM. Which, grubs a glove and just starts rubbing it on her face, like, ugh, and then rubbing her own titty. I wondered if this was a reference to my favorite movie ever made. This is Final Tap from 1982 of Smell the Glove. Yeah, I'm gonna believe that it is. What's wrong with being sexy?
Starting point is 00:29:40 I just, like, just her lightly rubbing her boob was like, this is weird. Yeah, yeah, touching it to her face and just squeezing her nip, I guess. I mean, whatever you do. Yeah, so she dons the gay apparel of the BDSM room. Good thing it fits her like a glove. I am a hundred percent surprised that we did not see her labia at any point because those like underpants are like slipping to the side constantly. There's nothing there. Nothing. It's a her entire vulva is being held in by a dream and a whisper.
Starting point is 00:30:18 Just a unicorn kiss down there. Yeah. She goes over to Crawford. Yeah. It was lying on a bed. She's like, hi, I know you're sick and tired and scared and also covered in bruises, but like, what fun? So I'm just gonna grab your dick right now? This is a salt. She goes under the covers and then tastes her fingers. That's not a thing that people do. Like I've never seen that as a sexy thing ever. May you tell a quick story? Yeah. I met a bar in on Bourbon Street in Louisiana. Okay. Have I told you the story before? And there's a younger gentleman dancing on the bar in just a speedo, tumescent. And an older gentleman goes up and sticks the aforementioned tumes it. Okay. And thus that's his right. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to to to to to their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their tell a tell a to tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a their a their a their a their a their a their tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell a tell. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I tell. Yeah. I tell. Yeah. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell a tell. I tell. I their tell a tell a their tell a t when he does, he cups the aforementioned two-messant member. I guess that's his right, sure, right.
Starting point is 00:31:07 Because he could treat people like... They have a five-minute conversation with this guy just holding, not moving his hand at all, just holding on. Like it was the bar that he was holding himself up to so that he could talk to the guy still like moving? No, no, he had stopped his gyran. Okay, he was not tired. I think he didn't want any motion to be happening while his cock was being gripped. Understood. And he started this gentleman and then the conversation ends and the guy pulls his hand out of the speed, walks away, lifts his hand to his face and... Wow. Wow.
Starting point is 00:31:38 I mean, this type of activity before. I guess if the dick smell gets you off. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, yeah, I shouldn't be that smelly. That shouldn't be judgy. You can smell a dick. Smell the dick. Well, my thought was when I saw that I was like,
Starting point is 00:31:54 oh, dudes are just gross. Dude's are just gross. So yeah, she tastes her fingers and then mounts him. And then that's when Bubba comes in. And says, what the hell are you doing? And it's like, just dry humping him a bit, just a bit, just a little bit of dry hump. Just between friends. He says, I told you to get dressed and she goes, I did. Ma'am, ma'am. And she, at this time, I think, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, has this very 80s soap opera hair.
Starting point is 00:32:27 Blonde blonde blonde and like voluminous and but like very bangy. Big bangs. And like with the bondage gear it just looks like the town librarian has decided to go as bondage lady for Halloween. Yeah, she's got like a news anchor, getting caught doing something vibe, for sure. So she then tries to put the moves on Bubba. And who can blame her? Who can blame either of him? I can blame either, really. And he says, you're asking for it, which I did not like.
Starting point is 00:33:00 That's a gross thing to say. But he had never intended to fuck her. to f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f- the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thus, thus, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. So, th, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thithing to say. It's a gross thing to say, but he had never intended to fuck her. No. He was just trying to restrain her. He yells at her. He yells at her. He yells at her. He yells at her. She drags her in front of a mirror and says, look at yourself. Is that who you are?
Starting point is 00:33:12 And she goes that has turned the machine back on? The resonator is turning itself on. Okay. You know what I mean? Wink, wink, nutch, nut. That means jerking it. He means jerking it. He means getting rid of your big, big hard on. What am I going to do with this hard on? Hard on. And so Bubba goes to turn the machine off again. Yeah. And there is a flystorm. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. B. th. B. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. uncooked pearl cuss-coose and I thought, boy, that is very dangerous because it's exactly what it looks like. And it looks like, it appears to be sort of like slapping them in a painful way. But sticking to them as well. All right, if you say so. And it was giving me faulty vibes.
Starting point is 00:34:01 I'm getting maggots storm. Which nothing will ever be that. No. When the phone is covered in maggots and someone answers the phone anyway. And somebody throws up because they really threw up? Yeah. Oh, no. God bless you.
Starting point is 00:34:15 That are you than me. So, for some reason, Crawford and Dr. Babs are able to get covered with the cus-goose and nothing happens to them. Yeah, why is it not affecting them? Is it because they're not moving? I guess. Okay. Maybe they're not horny.
Starting point is 00:34:33 No, they're both very horny. I don't know if he is. Again, he's sick and tired and they're coveredfore moves and the bugs are like, hey, ayahay, and they run to him and they eat his pants off? They do eat his pants off, which is not a sex term, they eat his pants off. And then they eat his legs, arms, and torso, but not his head. No, his head so is fully intact. So Kenfore is just in the floor, his head poking out with this funny, funny body in front of him?
Starting point is 00:35:06 It's amazing. It looks graterable, which is great and terrible. He's just a head hilarious. Oh, too bad for Bubba. Now fucking, Pratorius shows up again. He just likes to come in and be like, I am the hornyman. I don't know what he wants other than fucking. Like, what does he want? What is he trying to do? The most sensuous thing you can do is know someone else's mind. Which is the thing he says multiple times. Which is oddly insightful. For that letch. I guess, but you don't want to know like while you're making
Starting point is 00:35:46 boom boom as it were if your love is like taking a shit you know what's good kettle corn when this is over I'm gonna go puff some kettle corn oh yeah I love it too baby kettle corn oh yeah I love it too baby kettle corn Oh yeah, I love it too, baby. Kettle corn. Kettle corn. Shit, did I leave the teapot on? Some real hell-raiser shit with this pleasure in pain monologue that he's delivering. I just hate it. It's just not for me. What happens to Jeffrey Combs's pineal gland?
Starting point is 00:36:20 It pops out his forehead like a weird antenna peepee. It's like he's wearing one of those headbands that has like two little alien sort of bobbly things on it, but just one and it's in the middle and it's a penis. Like for a bachelorette party. His third eye, dick eye. Oh that's right. She did say that people thought it was like a third eye. Yeah. Hmm.
Starting point is 00:36:45 It's like, that looks like a penis, maybe you should leave. Maybe just get the fuck out of here. Like, the machine can't stop you from leaving the house, can it? It just makes you so horny you can't overcome your horned. What is she going to do with his heart on? So she's to do it tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, to do thi, to do thi, thi, to do thi, thi, to do to do to to to to to, to, to to, to just, to just, thi, to just to just to just to just tho, to just, to just, to just, to just, to just just just just just just just just just just, to just just just just just just just, to just just just just, to just just, to just just just just just just, the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. to just to just to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to it off? I think so, because electricity. Yeah. And then it doesn't work, so she has to do it again, and she's laughing and sobbing.
Starting point is 00:37:11 And so am I at this point. Yeah. So Crawford is back at the hospital. Yeah. But again, it felt like we missed something. Like, how did this scene actually end? Yeah, and Dr. Enemy is a surgeon? She's also a surgeon by the way. She's about to do surgery. She's tugging at his pine-nial glam. Yeah. Just tugging it, lightly tugging it. Yeah. It's like, what? What? What? Did you x-ray it? What are you? What's your plan here?
Starting point is 00:37:47 Because it's wiggling and jiggling. It's on the move. Calm down, Dr. Pimple Popper. Really? And she's like, about to do surgery. And the cop comes in with Babs. Yeah. And she's like, fuck the surgery. I'll go out there. tha tha tha tha. And the the the the the the the the the the the thuuuuke. the thuke. thuke. thuick. thuick. thu. to to thu. to thu. thu. to thoomk. thu. thu. tooomp, thoom. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. toe. toe. toe. toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. It's go out there. Like, he's under anesthesia. This is a secure, okay, sterile environment, no, I guess not.
Starting point is 00:38:06 The cop is like, well, now you're her doctor. And she's like, yeah, I am your doctor. It's like, none of this. You could just commit somebody by saying you didn't. Yeah. And she's gonna get electro shock therapy! And all this is because Dr. Enemie is jealous of her professionally? Exactly. Okay, that's lame. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. The nurse is like, but doctor, the protocol is you do what I say. Blah. She's not that bad. I'm gonna tug this guy's brain again. Yeah. But he in this meantime, in the meantime.
Starting point is 00:38:44 He being Crawford? Crawford has gotten up. Yeah. But he in this meantime, in the meantime. He being Crawford? Crawford has gotten up. Yeah. Walked past a plate of food. Picked up a handful of it. Cooked spinach it looked like. Crimps it into his mouth and then just lets it drop to the floor. It was the best thing that's happened to me in the last 24 hours. I loved that. Just something about that. It just really made me laugh. But then his penial gland is blippin' and blopping. It acts as a radar for things that he wants. It shows him what he wants because it glows purple. The thing he wants grows purple. Right, okay, so he, we are seeing things from his perspective. And he's like, it's so beautiful, but really just looks like heat signatures. I'm not real sure what he's, what he likes about this so much.
Starting point is 00:39:29 Yeah. Morning. Mm-hmm. So Dr. Enemy goes looking for him and thoes. Those, thoes, th? She goes, please don't eat those. Those aren't good for you. She says, please don't eat those. And he goes, they're delicious. And she goes, they can make you very sick.
Starting point is 00:39:52 Which felt very much like a conversation I'd be having with my child. Please don't eat those. And it was like, wait, suddenly this is the conversation you have with your child when they find something in the car that they've dropped and they're going to eat it now. But mom, it's good. No. No. No. How does their conversation end?
Starting point is 00:40:13 He eats her brain. He sucks her eyeball out. He eats her brain. Luckily, Babs does not get shock toreatment. Right, they at the last possible moment. All the nurses are called out of the room. Yes and she hits the doctor who was going to do the electric shock with all like the hanging light fixture. Uh-huh. And escapes in a van. Yeah. Which she drives down an alley and then an ambulance backs up that alley and I thought but how? How did they not rack? Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
Starting point is 00:40:45 So Crawford sucks off one of the EMTs, takes their eye out. Sucks them off, as we say. Now sucks up the other one. Colloquially for Cunning out someone's eye. To get to their brain. That's the snake man. That's him. Like an unhoused man strapped to a chair covered, or to a gurney, covered in his own vomit.
Starting point is 00:41:10 And I was like, really? Do we have? Okay. Everybody's got a vomit in this movie. And I don't mind. And he's like, I saw the snake man. That's the snake man. I laughed. So hard of him too. But Barbara Crampton's in the van. She's headed back to, she. She's, to, she's, to, to, to, to, to, the to, to, to, the to, the to, to, the to, the to, the the the th. th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the the the th. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I's. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. to. the th. to. the to. to. the to. to. the to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to, like, like, I. to That's the snake man. I laughed so hard of him too. But Barbara Crampton's in the van. She's headed back to, she just can't leave the fucking resonator alone. Right, right. And she knows that Crawford is headed back there as well. Right. And I said she's headed back to the house for one last horny hurr. Because I love all iteration. And we see the chalk out of Ken Forray's body. th. And the the the the the th, and the the th, and the the th, and the the th, and the the th, and the the th, and the the th, th, th, the the the th, th, the th, th, th. And thine, thine, thus, thine, th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, the the thin, the thin, the the the the thin, the the the thin, the thin, the the thin, the the the the, the thin, the, th It's so fucking funny. We find out she's not corny. She wants to dynamite the machine. Also there are no police officers here investigating the scene where a cop has been killed in like a weird and horrible way. It was Bella. No one
Starting point is 00:41:57 liked him. We always talked about his hard on. Or his football days. Everyone's like you didn't actually get four touchdowns in one game. So the machine turns itself back on as she places what looks like one of those styrofoam plates with ground beef you would buy at the at the giant eagle but it has a dynamite on it. It's styrofoam. Okay, got it. And she places it and she's like, wait. How do you notice that a detonator? And she just does. She's a psychiatrist. Of course. Oh my god. So the machine gets turned back on.
Starting point is 00:42:31 She bites off Crawford's penial gland. She bites the dick. I felt so sorry for Barbara Crampton having to put that thing in her mouth. And then after... Not for Jeffrey Combs who loses his pine-yoghlan? No. The actor. The actor, Barbara Crampton. Now his forehead looks like a butt hole. It's just a little gaper.
Starting point is 00:42:52 A little gaper right there in the middle of his forehead. And Pretorius shows back up and he's like... Oh my God, go home, Edward. There's so much of him now. He's thupe th. There's so much of him now, he's so much goopy. Why is he, why is this happening to his body? Yes. He has a huge dumper in tiny legs. He's a huge dumper, he wouldn't not be able to haul that thing around on tiny legs.
Starting point is 00:43:12 He's like a corgie times 10. He, and Stuart, this is Stuart Gordon, just we know what you jerk it to, my dude. You don't have to keep telling us. So Crawford is calling Pretorius a Limpdic Loser, basically. He's like, we know what you're doing this. You could never get it up. You're an eliptic loser.
Starting point is 00:43:36 And Pretorius is like, oh yeah, well, I canthe flying monster thing quite a bit. And then the flying monster thing eats Crawford's head. It sure does. But don't worry, Barbara Cramton's gonna be okay because there's a benevolent salamander that tries to free her. Yeah, a bunch of them that come and bite her of her bondage off. Why? Yes. Ah!
Starting point is 00:43:58 Because she's so horny friend. And meanwhile, Pretorius just keeps morphing into grosser and grosser shit. At this point, he's basically just like an ooze heap that's birthing Crawford and then swallowing him again. Yeah. Uh-huh. And the steps are pouring water for some inexplicable reason. Why? What in the actual fuck is this? Are you okay? Now, Crawford's body is birthing Pretorius?
Starting point is 00:44:33 I think so. They are entwined in the bonds of love. And then Brutorius births himself? Yeah. It's very, very, there's a lot of birthing going on. That's what happens when you make too much boom boom. I have to tell you. Too many babies. Too many babies slash too many shits, we're not sure. We don't know what the phrase means. So she jumps out at the window, which is obviously 100% Barbara Crampton. their leg is narly.
Starting point is 00:44:55 Yeah, that was great. Yeah. Like our whole kneecap is out. Yes. And the neighbors are, there's a ton of neighbors in the driveways immediately. And they're like, oh, we always knew this would happen, you know. And I love it because from where that house, when we see the front of that house, there can't be anything around that house. Especially to get th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the tho that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. Yeah th. Yeah th. Yeah th. Yeah, tho th. Yeah, tho tho tho tho tho thooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, thoooooooooooooooooo. Yeah, that's that that that house, when we see the front of that house, there can't be anything around that house. Especially to get there that quickly on foot. Yeah, so it's just like that house and then a suburban street right across street from it. They're like, oh yeah, we live in the development over there. We call the ambulance, they're coming for you. Yeah, that's Bunny's mom, bunny and bunny's mom are here. Bunny is no worse worse worse worse worse worse worse worse worse worse worse worse worse from worse from worse from worse from worse from worse from worse from worse from worse from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from the worse. No worse. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. the the the th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's their their that's their their the house. the house. the house. the the the the house. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th Pretorius's body. Oh my God. And she says what happened in there and Barbara Crampton says it ate him and then cackles, sobs and then cackles.
Starting point is 00:45:58 Fade to black. Duh. Da da da. Da. I would like you to read my last note aloud, please. If I may, and do it in my voice. What the fuck, Alan? What the fuck, Alan? What the fuck, Alan? Ah, listening the exact reaction I wanted from this.
Starting point is 00:46:21 I mean, I went into it with a bad attitude. Bad attitude, if you will. And I was pretty sure there was going to be some sexual assault on it. Because that's the vibe. Holy ghost. And in my defense, this is all based on Barbara. You do not get to defend yourself. Barbara Gram did post a hot picture of herself and PDSM where.
Starting point is 00:46:42 You were like, oh yeah. I gotta get horned up for th. th. th. th. You. th. You. You. th. You. th. th. You. You. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I. th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm, th. th. th. th. th. I'm th. tho. th. th. that's. that's. that's. that's. I, that's. I. I. I. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. That's. That's. I. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That. That. That. That. That's. th. that's. th. th. that. that. that. that. th. that. th. th. th. th. th. t. th. that. that. that's. that's. that's. I'm. I. that's. I. gotta get horned up for that. What am I gonna do with this hard on? The question you posed to all your friends. What am I going to do about this hard on? My God. Katie. What? What? I'd like to invite you to a part of the podcast we call low ratings. Face 10 is it all right? What next? What next? What? What? What? What? What? What? Why don't you go? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? the. What? What? the. What? the. What? the. What? the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theto a part of the podcast we call low ratings phase 10 is it all right? What next? Why don't you go ahead and go first? This movie is ridiculous. Yeah. And it sets out to be nothing but.
Starting point is 00:47:14 Yeah. Does exactly what it achieves. to or it just set out to do. It achieves it. Give it a six. Dude, no. Wrong. It's a two. I hated it. What about babs, cramps, in bondage care? What about 10 for his hard, huh? That's why it got two. For his tiny unease and for him saying that line, that's why it gets to.
Starting point is 00:47:39 Two points. What am I going to do with this? I have some ideas. I don't know. There are things that can resolve this issue. I think you would know that. I don't know, I'm going to stick it in a jar of peanut butter and see what happens. Do yourself a peanut butter hole.
Starting point is 00:47:53 Fuck. Katie. Can I read you a rating that we got on Apple's iTunes? thi thank you. Five stars. Thank you. Only good thing about Mondays is this podcast. Oh my god, yes, Garfield, I agree. I don't even like horror movies, but love listening to the two, these two, discussed them. Oh, how did you end up here? I tho, easily one of the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best disgust them. Oh, how did you end up here? I know. Yeah. Easily one of the best and funniest podcasts of all time. Oh my god. I hope they never die. This podcast never ends. Okay, that's really sweet, but like, that's a bit of a curse. You just might have cursed us, but that means you
Starting point is 00:48:37 have to live forever too, because what good is us putting out the episodes if you're dead. Yeah, take that nab-zib. Nabsib, think this through before you curse us. Thank you so much for leaving us a review. You're really kind. Can you guys all do that? Everybody? Everyone? Everybody? Everybody?
Starting point is 00:48:53 Everybody? If you're within the sound of our voice, Go leave us a review. Please do. A good one, no, only a good one. Yeah. Only a good one. Yeah, yeah. Because if you leave a bad one, Alan and I are going to text each other about it for an entire workday. I mean it rolls off our back. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:16 Oh, yeah. My favorites are the star rating and were the star rating and they're of you don't match up. Yeah. Although, like, they'll accidentally give us five stars. We like, this fucking guy is the worse. He laughs. Or one star, and this is my favorite podcast. Just look, I love this.
Starting point is 00:49:34 Did you not, did you not click right? Katie? Alan. . ................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... What shall we do next week? Let's do a movie that you suggested I show to my six-year-old, which is a good thing you're not a parent. I said I heard that people were showing it to their children. Yeah. Not that I think you should.
Starting point is 00:49:51 No, you're right. But I was just saying, I was Donald Trump in it and saying, you know, a lot of people are saying. A lot of people are saying. it would be okay for me to show our killer clowns from outer space, which then I re-watched and was like, oh no! Just beheadings, all sorts of things. Hey, I got a vasectomy. I never have to make these decisions. I like that the vasectomy has made you a nice, a spicy meat ball. Brought you that tyramusu, you think you're one of us now.
Starting point is 00:50:25 I'm gonna fuck that tyramisu up. I don't know, I've still stuck on Ken Forey putting his penis into a jar of peanut better and that just like gave me something, you can keep the teperware I guess is what I'm saying. No, no, no, I know, I don't want to talk about it anymore. Uh-uh. Five nights at Fridays. We're doing five nights at Fridays. I hope you guys like it. And all of that to say, we shall do another episode next week. For nab-zib, we have to keep going. We have to keep going.
Starting point is 00:51:00 We have to thea to the. to this podcast. Well, do I have to work still or can I just do the podcast? I don't know. Okay. I have to talk to Nab Zib. Because it's like, you can have to still be making money, you know? It's true. How am I going ron's. It's true. Okay. All right, well, if we can work it so that we can just do the podcast, I'll live forever. I love it. I love it.
Starting point is 00:51:30 I love this for you. I love this for you. I'll try and thin. Oh, he's no longer. tho' thin' thi's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's. th. thi-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th-a. th-a. to-a. to-a. to-a. to-a. to-a. to-a. to-s. to-a. to-s. to-s. to-a.. Fondling your boob with this gigantic hand. Look like my hands. Comically large hand. No, it doesn't. Absolutely tus.
Starting point is 00:51:50 Uh, come back for five nights at Freddy's. Yeah. It's on the Pecocke right now. That's great. And we love you. Thank you for being Patron. Thank you for listening, even if to be a patron, you can do that by going to W.W.W.W.W.W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W.
Starting point is 00:52:10 that's W. W. W. W. that's. That's H.T.T. P.T. P. T. P. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. t. to. to. to. t. t. t. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. to. to. t. t. th. th. th. to. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. to. to Patreon and search for a Wearwolf Ambulance. You'll find this. Yeah, you'll figure it out. You're smart. Or if you just Google Patreon Wherewolf Ambulance. You should find it that way too. Yeah, we just recorded, I'm sorry. I was gonna say, stop searching Where O'Off Ambulance to the feet and go and look for it. Does auto fill that, which I think we should just start just just just just just just I'm open to doing only fans if people are interested.
Starting point is 00:52:45 There could be good money for you. We just recorded our most recent Patreon episode for Action Movies, which normally we let our Patron's vote. I decided that after they made me watch Space Jam, that I would be picking this month, and for some fucking reason, I picked the DMX Jetly film, Cradle to the Grave. To The Grave. Like Prince wrote the movie. Yes.
Starting point is 00:53:07 It is a fun episode. It is a fun, much more fun than the movie. Yep. Oh, I do love the idea of a vengeance pick that just comes back and bite you right in the ass. Your own petard, hoisted on it. It's like, why don't I ever learn anything? Why would you bother? Man, because being fun is better than knowing things. BAM!
Starting point is 00:53:28 BAM! Oh, wait, we didn't do this for Barbara Crampton's tis. Thanks, Babs. I mean, they need to be acknowledged. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I acknowledged them. Oh, oh, gnaw. What are you going to do with with that that that that that that that that that that th th th th th th th th of here before things get weird. I don't know, not much I'm 50. Probably just take a little napper. You're not 50 yet. You've got
Starting point is 00:53:50 four months to go. I know. Yeah, less than four months. Thank you. I'm just counting down. Oh what was it? Oh, uh, oh, uh, oh, uh, someone recently bought Whe Ambulancet-shirts on pillows, and they look fucking fantastic. There's a picture on our discord of their pillow. It looks so cuddly. It looks so nice. I didn't know it printed on both sides.
Starting point is 00:54:14 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So go get some pillows with our faces on the one. I God, would it be too jerking off in the mirror for me to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the mirror to the mirror to the mirror the mirror to to to the mirror for me to get one. No, I really want to release the, what is the, everybody wants to get fingered as a pillow so we can have it. I love that. I've also ruined that song because it came on my playlist yesterday while I was making Thanksgiving food and I was singing it to Rob and I changed it to everybody wants to get fingered and of course he doesn't listen to this show. And he was like, what? What? What? So, so th th th th is th is so cool. So, th is so cool. So, th is th is so cool. th is th th is so cool. th. th th is so cool. th. th. th. the the th. th. th. the th. th. the the the they they their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. What is th. What is th. What is th. What is thi. the. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. the. the. thi. thi. to get fingered. And of course he doesn't listen to this show. And he was like, what?
Starting point is 00:54:45 So cool. Have you turned on the horny machine in the attic again? I know. My resonator. All right, go bust your business. Yeah, we're done. I hope it's a good one. Yeah. All right.
Starting point is 00:55:03 All right. Thanks for listening to another episode of Wear-Off Ambulance. Bye. Uh, shit, I don't know. What are you going to do with this hard on? What are you going to do? Oh! Oh! Bye. Whoo? No we do in Finland's to fulfill reviews. Get the clouds and let the face.
Starting point is 00:55:47 Can Emily and have his face? Our parents are basket case. Please make a guy continue the grave. E&T. A Road comedy reviews, hungry Brian from wings and Stephen Gang. EaT. We live deliciously, by tempo trees, obese, crazily gone to die. A paranormal activity from Mr. Rogers city.
Starting point is 00:56:18 E-M-D. E-M-D. E-M-D.

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