Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep171 - Movie Reviews in 20 Q's

Episode Date: September 15, 2019

This week we first travel to Turkey to pick up Kaya on our way to New Zealand. Two guys who have been told they have annoying accents make fun of Kiwis for "talking funny." Also, because they're dumb ...idiots who are pretending to do a movie review show. There's also a lot of talk about our buddies Mr. Melendez and Mr. Hughes along with the introduction of our new BFF Rhys. Happy birthday Rhys! https://teespring.com/stores/who-are-these-podcasts Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 I had a heart, was a big bass ball, where, back, high school He could feel that street ball flying Making the blood of food more Some year the night at this roadside bar I was walking in, he was walking out We went back inside, sat down Had a few drinks But all we get, talking about, for a day We're with messy by glory days
Starting point is 00:00:54 And the work of the world's eye for a day For a day You're a loser. A loser. It's show time. W. A. T. P. Right you, P! Hello, back slabbers and cousin ruse, welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts, the only show that isn't on SNL because we once recorded our imitation of Mickey Rooney's
Starting point is 00:01:38 character from the movie Breakfast at Tiffany's. I'm your host, Carl, with me this week from the official podcast. It's Kay everybody. And from Turkey. Hello, Kaya Cohen in from Turkey today. We appreciate you. Hop it on. Please go to who are these.com to get our email address, voicemail number, link to our
Starting point is 00:01:58 sub right at link to the discord server, link to our merchandise. We also encourage our listeners to give us a five star review and iTunes and then shit all over us in the comment section. I have to get to the comments today before we break Kaya because I don't know if it's that Millennial podcast we did. The Morning Toast ladies. Somehow we have a whole new audience discovering our show and they're not thrilled with us.
Starting point is 00:02:25 But before that, we'll be reviewing a podcast called Movie Reviews and 20 Qs. This was a suggestion from Daniel. Kaya and I have both listened to the show separately. We have not discussed it with each other beforehand. Let's get into it. This is a podcast on a New Zealand with hosts, Sam and Stacey Hurley, a married couple. And what they do is they review movies, very original concept. And Kaya, I gave you the assignment saying, listen to whatever you want. I'm going to do episode 83 about Bill and Ted's excellent adventure, which I did. But I'll be honest, I listened to a bunch of episodes.
Starting point is 00:03:07 I went back to early episodes. I listened to some more recent ones. So I have clips that span a lot of different episodes of this podcast. Okay, yeah, I did the same. I listened to episode 18, which is Ghost in the Shell and episode 59 Mad Max Fury Road. I also listened to the silence of the lambs,
Starting point is 00:03:26 but unfortunately that track got lost until... Oh, shit. I got it. I noticed they have premium content. Have you seen those? They put suicide squad behind a paywall because why would you not wanna pay these assholes to listen to their boring ass questions? Yeah, somebody sent me a note that said
Starting point is 00:03:45 their first 10 episodes, so their very first episode was the female ghostbusters movie they reviewed. And then the next 10 are behind a paywall. So it's a weird thing to do. Very ambitious. Yeah, right? It's a weird thing to do to think
Starting point is 00:03:57 you're very first episodes and say, if you want to hear this garbage, you got to pay for it. Typically, you get better as you go, but I thought it was interesting because I wasn't sure how popular this show was. It seems like it could be pretty popular because every episode,
Starting point is 00:04:13 they have all these other podcasts that submit questions. And so they'll say, this is a question that comes in from so and so, and this question came in from this podcast and that podcast, I'm like, oh, maybe this is a big show. Now, I don't think so. I don't think anyone's listening to this show. I don't see it. I don't see it I think they do zealot
Starting point is 00:04:30 I don't see anyone outside of New Zealand listening to this first of all right saying this as you are in the US and I'm in Turkey But nonetheless doesn't New Zealand have a population of like seven and a half people there 13 people unless Peter Jackson's making a movie and then there's 300. So it just depends on what the production schedule is, what the pop even then even then they will see G. That's a good point. Okay, let's get into this because I want to start playing some clips. Do you have a clip that summarizes the show for you? Yeah. So first of all, the show is not really a movie review show,
Starting point is 00:05:07 which is no, that's how you pitched it to me. I checked it out and from the name I figured, okay, let me guess they're gonna get someone in the studio and they're gonna ask 20 questions and at the end they have to guess what movie it is they were questioned asking questions about. That would have been a good concept. Like we're gonna do 20 questions to try to figure out what it is. Instead, they just set up these questions to talk about themselves. That's all they want to do. Yeah, so exactly.
Starting point is 00:05:35 Every episode is simply, hey, the theme of this episode is the movie in the title. Let's just ask random questions to each other based on this movie, which is my summary clip that's clip 4. So this is from the Mad Max episode Fury Road and yeah, just play clip 4. What flavor ice cream would this movie be? It's a Rocky Road. It's chunky, it's sweet. And they go on a hell of a Rocky Road. I they go on a hell of a rocky road. They go on one hell of a rocky road. Perfect answer there, Spanky. I'm going with salted caramel.
Starting point is 00:06:09 You know, salt, sand, same thing to me. Why not? Same color. Fair enough, I'm similar to it your lines. I'm sticking with the color theme there of gold rush. So, a bit of a mix. I forgot to point out that I absolutely fucking love salted caramel.
Starting point is 00:06:22 So, and I absolutely love this movie. Oh. All right, so that brings us fucking loved SOTE CARAMON, so... and I absolutely love this movie. Oh. Mmm. All right, so that brings us along to our next question, which is... what deep philosophical debate arose in you during this film? And that's it. That's basically the entire podcast is... Hey, if you had a Luftballoon, what color would it be based on this movie? And if they're watching it, they're all gonna say red.
Starting point is 00:06:41 Right. That's the fucking podcast. That has nothing to do with the movie. I listened to the episode that was Get Out, watching it, they're all gonna say red. That's the fucking podcast. That has nothing to do with the movie. I listened to the episode that was Get Out and Get Out is a movie where this white girl brings a black guy in so that I'm sure everyone's seen the movie.
Starting point is 00:06:55 It's very popular, but very much has to do with black and white and the white people are taking these black people and putting themselves in their bodies. So they say, what ice cream would you be, or what ice cream is this movie, and they're all like cookies and cream, like, okay. I didn't understand why that's entertaining,
Starting point is 00:07:13 why does that add anything, it's not fun. They talk about what cookie is this movie, what sandwiches is this movie, these are terrible questions. Even if there was a seasoned comedian, they couldn't go up with something funny to say with these setups. And that's the whole point of this.
Starting point is 00:07:29 It's the couple's like, witty banter to talk about and they fail miserably at it. Oh, it's not just, not only do they fail at it. It's all scripted first of all. I'm gonna get to that too, but doesn't this just feel like a really boring couple in their loser friend who just doesn't have anything else to do on a Friday evening?
Starting point is 00:07:47 I think you just unite this. I think you know, we play Monopoly. Yeah, I think you just like to just do a podcast. So here, I'm gonna play an example of, they set up this question that should, it should give you something to make jokes out of. And I think they use this one, the 20 questions vary from episode to episode, but there's a few that they ask every
Starting point is 00:08:08 time. I believe this is one they ask every time. And this is an episode, this is get out. What would be the porn parody name of this movie? What would be the porn parody name of the movie get out? So that's a pretty standard. You can write some jokes around that. It can't be something that's similar to Get Out, but would be some sexual innuendo. Would have something in there that could make someone chuckle. This is the first stab at it.
Starting point is 00:08:37 This is Stacey. I think this is already a porn parody. Get out. There's been no laughs. What do you mean? I'm not. So Stacey comes up with, oh yeah, the porn would be called Get Out. Why? Why is why is that a porn title? I'm not sure. Yeah, that's not even what you mean by that. You said the questions vary from episode to episode. They don't even not that much. I mean
Starting point is 00:09:05 that's a lot. I don't know 40 episodes apart and they had the same questions in the Mad Max one. They asked the porn title question as well. But the most embarrassing part of this all is they read all of their answers from their from notes. Yes. This isn't ad lib on the spot and you can notice this a lot during their answers. It just feels like they're reading, which is my clip 6. It's not a special clip or anything, but you can tell this guy's just reading off of a sheet of paper there. What aspect of this film is most similar to your own life?
Starting point is 00:09:37 For me, it's a common known fact that I am a human torch that I'm hot all the time. I sympathise. I look at these characters and I see them hot as shit running around and fucking leather jackets and god knows what else trying to look cool. When in actual fact they are probably boiling their testicles off into a swampy pit of sweat between their legs. Ugh. Swamp Nuts.
Starting point is 00:09:58 What? Okay. There's a crotch. There it is again. There's not a good porn perry night. So notice how he doesn't even have fun reading his own notes. There's like, da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da give it an assignment. He completed the assignment and now he's handing it in. You guys told me to do this. Here's what I did. Are we good now? Am I completed the assignment?
Starting point is 00:10:30 Can I please get a gold star and go home? Kay, I want to bring it back to the get out porn parody. So I played you the first answer, which was immediately, Stacey says, oh, I got it, it's get out. That's the porn parody name. So then Stacey elaborates on I got it, it's get out. That's the porn parody name. So then Stacey elaborates on that because it only can get funnier.
Starting point is 00:10:50 I'm just gonna expand on that and use one of my favorite catch phrases when I'm talking to Sam and that is get out of there. All right, so remember there are married couple. And Stacey says, well, let me elaborate. So just get out. Let's get out of there.
Starting point is 00:11:07 And now this is like a cute little inside joke between this couple. And I don't think she understands how porn movies work. Why would I watch a porn called Get Out of There? I want to get in there. It should be called Get In. That's the obvious joke people. Not get out. So then Sam takes an attempt! That's the obvious joke, people! Not get out!
Starting point is 00:11:26 So then Sam takes an attempt at coming up with a joke, a porn parody, forget out. So, I'm gonna go with inter jobs or head jobs either way this is not a porn thing I've never once seen a movie called head jobs or hit jobs. What the fuck is a head job? It's nothing you can give someone head you can give a bow job but there isn't a head job. He goes I got this guys I got this interracial head job and then he calls his shite, he thinks he's so clever, he goes, I'm actually gonna Google that.
Starting point is 00:12:06 That's probably already the name of a portal. Guess what, it's not. It's not a name of a portal, it doesn't make any sense. I got one more for you, Kair. The kind of thing you would make up if you were trying to impress your classmates on the playground, but you've never actually seen porn. Rites!
Starting point is 00:12:23 Yeah, like the, the job, the head job. Yeah, the head when she does that So this is the way this is the guest who's on the show is every week they have Gas so long with the married couple and he's got his own non joke But you can't who do you go root of evil? Hey, what do you go root of evil? That's good. I like that what the hell are you talking about? Okay, why is root of evil a porn title? No, I don't fucking know. I don't know either is it big? I mean the movie I guess white people are bad so
Starting point is 00:13:03 They're the roots of all evil. Yeah, I get that. I guess white people are bad so they're the root of all evil. Yeah, I get that. I don't understand what they have to do with porn though. The dick is rooted. You're trying. I like it. Oh, I'm going to try. Just again, how boring do you have to be to be this couple's friend who hangs out? You said they have different guests, but from the episodes that I listened to was the same co-host every single time some guy called Spunker is spike
Starting point is 00:13:31 Oh, yeah, yeah, Spunky, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, sitting in with them You have nothing better to do than hang out with this boring-esque couple making inside jokes You know that feeling when you're on the bus or something you have to watch a a couple of kiss and some of the revolting thing. They're doing it publicly. Like, oh god, fuck, just so I want to get off. Yep. This is that podcast. That's how you would summarize. That's how you'd summarize this podcast. I think I agree with that. It makes a lot of
Starting point is 00:13:59 sense. Guy, what else you got, buddy? Let's first get through, I run't really give people an impression of what the questions are like, so I have the compilation of all the questions that's clip one. Alright. What line from this film would be the worst thing to say, immediately after you finish making love? How would you incorporate Nicholas Cage into this movie? Which two characters would you want with you on a crazy night out? What do you guys think would be the porn parody name for this film?
Starting point is 00:14:26 Why is Max Mad? What would be a bizarre chemo by a character from another film? What aspect of this film is most similar to your own life? Who would you get to represent New Zealand at a Miss World pageant? How quickly do you guys reckon Australia would turn into a post-apocalyptic wasteland? What is the most pointless trip that I've reviewed to have ever been on?
Starting point is 00:14:46 Suggest and describe an instrument, another instrument that you could see shooting flames. Suggest another town that would be a, uh, have a well-sought after commodity. How long would you guys survive in this movie's world? So I think that the disconnect here is the fact that it says movie reviews in 20 queues because what they do is they don't review the movie. Well, they do a little bit. But for the most part, they read this anopsis. They tell you what the movie is. And then they just play these boring couple games with each other, which is almost like listening to people play cards against humanity, which is a boring ass game.
Starting point is 00:15:25 If you were just to listen in as people giggled to each other about whatever card they pulled over, that's what this show is. It's a boring couples game. It is, yeah. And even when they do review, it's this boring mediocre middle of the road opinion. It's either, oh yeah, so this was a good movie, right? You guys, yeah, yeah, good movie. Or, well, this was kind of a silly dumb movie right you guys yeah, yeah good movie or well
Starting point is 00:15:45 This was kind of a silly down movie right you guys look at the rotten tomatoes and that's 20% it's this boring like It's okay to be a dispassion at centrist But not if you're trying to make people laugh then it's boring. Yeah, I need a little bit more passion Be a little opinionated be an ass do something more do something compelling or provocative, be provocative to some degree, I wanna play you an example. This is from Bohemium Nirhapsody. They covered this movie and the guy pulls out this brilliant analysis to describe how we felt, because they do this thing called the compliment sandwich.
Starting point is 00:16:17 They say something good, there's something bad, there's something good. And this is just brilliant analysis about how good the movie is. Why don't you lead us off? Right. Okay, so I just think this is a good, easy to watch movie. That was probably the thing I liked about this movie the most is why I gave it kind of a hide score. You know, it's pretty soft. We went through stuff that we expected to see.
Starting point is 00:16:37 You know, it's kind of a happy ending at the end. So overall, it's an easy watch. That's like, she must m'Killian level of movie review. It's, uh, it's easy to watch. She was alright. Uh, didn't bother me. Great. What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:16:52 You have no business reviewing a movie. You don't even understand what's going on in front of you. Why am I listening to your opinion on this? Yeah, their reviews are fucking stupid. Uh, so they do the same sandwich bullshit with Mad Max and I kind of keyed in on this woman because she turned out to be the dumbest member of this whole crew. I noticed that. She better be good looking mad Sam.
Starting point is 00:17:15 I mean, if you're listening to the sandwich, you better be good looking. Please, this is clip two. So this is about Mad Max. They again ask her to say something good, something bad. Play that one. So Stacy, why don't you hit us one thing good, one thing bad, and one thing good about Mad Max Fury Road. Good thing is this movie is bright and colourful. Bad thing is there just isn't enough story, motivation, I don't really understand why
Starting point is 00:17:40 the characters are just racing around in the desert for no reason. And the final good thing, the main character is an awesome female who totally kicks ass in this story. She's like a dog if it could talk like, you're just bright. You're like, you're like, fucking idiot.
Starting point is 00:18:00 The director originally wanted Matt Max Fury, I don't know if you saw the movie, but his original idea was you wanted it to be black and white, but he couldn't do it because, you know, I don't know for whatever fucking reason. The point is, after the theatrical run, they re-released it on Blu-ray as the black and chrome edition, as his original vision, as is meant to be seen,
Starting point is 00:18:20 which you can find on deepdiscount.com. That's right. So even her milk toast bullshit boring child like review of it is wrong. Second of all, I don't get why aren't they driving around? It doesn't like this. It just wasn't enough story. Fuck me, man. This is why movies like this are such a rarity? We're just fun action.
Starting point is 00:18:46 No five minutes of exposition or boring 20 minutes of dialogue. You have idiots like this who don't pay attention to what's on the screen and then you go, what is happening? Why are they in a desert? What is there rewind? Did they die?
Starting point is 00:18:59 What is the post apocalypse? What's going on? That's... That's... That was my phone alarm. My bad. Oh, Jesus, I thought that there was an apocalypse happening in Turkey just now. Fucking wish.
Starting point is 00:19:13 I want to point out, when you played that clip, I assume that that was not edited by you, correct? No. I didn't edit any of these, actually. This show is so highly edited, and I wanna give it credit for that, because I believe that when they do these shows, they probably spend three hours giggling with each other, and then they thankfully cut it down to like 45, 50 minutes
Starting point is 00:19:36 that we have to listen to. But you could hear in that clip that you just played, all of the editing that's going on, and it brings the pace up quite a bit. I was trying to listen to this podcast, sped up a little bit. I had to slow it down because it just goes and goes and goes The problem with it is that there's zero analysis They'll say I like this movie. It was colorful. It had a lot of bright colors I didn't like this movie because it's like nothing ever gets expanded upon they never explain
Starting point is 00:20:03 What they're talking about. I'll give you an example of this. They, I watched the, or listened to the Bill and Ted's one. And this woman Stacy did not like Bill and Ted's excellent adventure. And one of the things they ask is, what's the deep philosophical debate that this movie created it inside of your head?
Starting point is 00:20:27 Right, and this is our answer to that with by the way these people cannot they don't have the capability of anything deep and philosophical So that's a crazy question to ask, but isn't what Stacy says what's your deep philosophical debate? Stacey really well, it's not deep. It's not that philosophical. I just want to know how did this movie get made? I'm not loving it, and I'm like, come on. This is the extent of her criticism. She goes, how did this movie get made? Which is the name of a fucking podcast? How did this get made? It's not a good point. How did this get made? Whoa, you fucking crushed them. Like, boy, okay, what do you mean by that? I don't know, I didn't like it, it's not that good. Okay, what's your point?
Starting point is 00:21:10 And then she goes on to just be a stick in the mud and drag all of the energy out of the podcast. Thank you. I got wrong, we know it was young, I did love this movie and I watched it, but just if I just don't love it now. Yeah, okay. To me, was it, will any time travel movie or show one could go into
Starting point is 00:21:28 deep discussion about how many faults are in it and probably best not to read too deeply into it. You just gonna sit back and just go okay it's a movie it's good fun yeah so I wouldn't get too deep philosophical into it. All right so the person you just heard is this woman named Gijit Van LaRue. And Gijit is also a co-host of a podcast called Retro Cinema Podcast. She wrote into the show.
Starting point is 00:21:55 She claims to be a fan of WTP. So I have nothing bad to say about Gijit. And what I like is that she tells Stacy, I don't overthink it. It's a goofy comedy movie. I don't know why you're dragging the show down, hating on Bill and Ted's excellent adventure, gives a shit. We're just trying to have a little bit of fun here.
Starting point is 00:22:14 And meanwhile, Stacy's going, I didn't like this movie, a bubble, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, okay, it's fine, Gary. Yeah, I just fucking go along with it. It's like when your friend just throws a fun hypothetical at you. Like, would you rather fuck your mom in your girlfriend's body or your girlfriend in your mom's body or something?
Starting point is 00:22:32 And then your friend just goes, that would never happen. Right. He just puts a halt to the whole conversation. Well, hold on a second. How would that even, is that even scientifically possible? Like, I don't know. I'm just alright, whatever. Yeah, that's not the fucking point. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:22:49 And to quickly get back to your point about how overedited this is and how they never leave any pause for what to expand on anything, not just that, but I don't know if you noticed there's so many shitty smash cuts in this, I don't know who's editing. But the editor has made a habit of smash cutting from laughter to somebody talking. And I have a compilation of all of the, some of these at least, the compilation got way too long at some point, so I had to cut it down to a third of it.
Starting point is 00:23:16 So in this clip, I put a bleep in between every clip that I pulled, but the clips themselves, they are unedited. These are actual smash cuts in the stupid fucking podcast. That's... I'm glad you pulled this together. I'm glad you pulled this together because when Daniel suggested this show,
Starting point is 00:23:34 he brought this up specifically. It's unnatural sounding. Were they're giggling and then now they're just on the next thing, it's not well edited, so this is perfect. Yeah, we don't need to go into his thing. It's not well edited. So this is perfect Yeah, okay, so it goes to the shell come back, but all great to have you back here So this week guys we went and saw ghosts in the shell. We're not supporting this Yeah, I totally agree that's that's the obvious one. Oh, yeah Yeah, I agree it would be unnoothing.
Starting point is 00:24:09 Oh, we're gonna have to get my shirt. What are we talking about? There's almost a bit like big hero's silks, which is San Francisco. Yes, yeah. Hey, what baddie in films has been most of a let? I'm gonna go with Max. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:24:27 So we've got a live scene this baby. So we quickly rush out. Son of a next door's ghost in the show. We rush in there and... Yeah, that's perfect. You could set the needle down on the record in any spot and hear one of these cuts. It's so unnatural.
Starting point is 00:24:42 Yeah, it sounds like the shoveled in... It radic. I thought my Spotify was starting to skip when this was happening because I didn't understand why laughter suddenly cuts to somebody calmly talking. Right. I don't know if it's sloppy editing. I don't know if he just eyeballed it. If he was zoomed out too far in his editing program, I just call a couple of laughter. He called a couple of laughter. He caught a couple of waveforms in the crossfire or what,
Starting point is 00:25:09 or if he just didn't give a shit, but this happens throughout every episode that I listened to. Early on and in the middle later on, they never fixed this fucking problem of themselves smash cutting awkwardly. That made me laugh when you said he's eyeballing it and I'll tell you why. I put together a laugh compilation. These guys are constantly cracking up and giggling over
Starting point is 00:25:30 nonsense. There is nothing funny being said. No one's been witty on this show ever. Okay, you and I have listened to probably 10 or 12 episodes between the two of us. So I know for a fact that this show is never funny and they're always cracking up, always cracking up. And when you say they're eyeballing it, I'm laughing because as I was going through and pulling this laugh compilation, I could see with my eyeballs where the stupid eruption of laughter was because you could tell by the wave form. So I would just, I would just pull to that point. All right, let me grab this. Okay, let me grab this, pop it in, pop it in, pop it in. And I didn't want to put together a left compilation that goes on for 17 minutes, like I could have, because that's boring. So I went ahead and layered it on top of each other and it sounds like this. Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
Starting point is 00:26:33 And it's all forced laughter. None of it is natural. None of it sounds like somebody is in the moment being taken like, whoa, did you just said that? Because like you said, it's all pre-written. I read an interview with them on some website and he said, we spend a couple hours writing out all the questions, filling out our answers. Jesus. Yeah, this is all good. Oh, this is all very prepared. And then there's no spontaneity.
Starting point is 00:27:02 They just get together and they do these things. I want to play an example of what cracks people up. So there's a question that comes up in Bill and Ted's, excellent adventure. And the question comes from another podcast and it says, what film would be the best or worse to watch as a double feature with this film? And so the one woman who's on here, I think this is Gidget.
Starting point is 00:27:24 Sorry, Gidget, she is a big fan of Beethoven. And of course in Bill and Tess Exxon Adventure they go back in time and they grab Beethoven. So she, so she connects the dots in her hand decides this would be not a good movie. Anyway whatever, I've explained this too much. Here's the answer she gives. The worst would be Gary Oldman in a mortal beloved because he plays Beethoven and that's a pretty depressing movie. So, uh, and it'd bring you down off that billenteered high for sure. Yeah, but it's got Beethoven, so good. Nice. Or the Slepenard Dog movie Beethoven. I didn't sweeten that anyway. She says the St. Bernard dog movie, Beethoven, and you hear
Starting point is 00:28:08 saying, oh, she said was there's a movie called Beethoven that stars a St. Bernard. This is just a fact. I don't know what's funny about that. And I set this up because I want to play the clip that sums up the show for me. Now that you've heard that, this is referencing a movie equals laughter on this show. But they can't leave it at that. There's done a terrible tag with more force laughter and it just continues to go on and on for no reason. The Sleipinad dog maybe by show. A bit dog might have more intelligence than bellowed. The, uh, Sleip and Ardog movie by Jove. What? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha than the characters in a movie. Okay, what does that even mean?
Starting point is 00:29:05 I get why was that it? I get the feeling Sam's just laughing along awkwardly because he doesn't want to sleep on the couch. Yes, that's what this show is. You can hear it at the end that are like in his voice he goes, yeah, awkwardly. First of all, you can't laugh at your own jokes, especially if you've pre-written them.
Starting point is 00:29:24 Right. Like hours before or days before. You can't laugh at your own jokes, especially if you've pre-written them. Right. Like hours before or days before. I imagine if these guys are wife and husband, they compare notes, sitting next to each other on the couch with a shardonnay, you know, like, so, okay, well, and then we should ask this question, oh, should we switch? Okay, so you could say this, I thought of this, I wrote this down for you, so give that read, rehearse it, if you like.
Starting point is 00:29:47 How could this possibly be funny? This guy has to be just laughing along to make his wife happy, which is maybe why in editing, listening back to it, when he's all by himself in his office or whatever editing this, he just smash cuts the laughter because he just can't bear it anymore. Is like I said, he's okay, enough of this. Let's just move it along. Let's cut the and he's like, okay, enough of this. Let's just move it all on. Let's cut the laughter short.
Starting point is 00:30:08 It's not just embarrassed by it. I wrote down, if I can describe this show in one word, it is uncomfortable. That is the one word description of this show because nothing on it is natural or spontaneous. Everything is uncomfortable. And it's just, is it they're just trying to get through it? because nothing on it is natural or spontaneous. Everything is uncomfortable, and it's just, is it they're just trying to get through it?
Starting point is 00:30:29 Okay, we're gonna have a lot of fun today. We're gonna make a lot of jokes. Ha, ha, ha. One of the questions they ask every episode is, if Nick Cage was in this movie, which character would he play? And apparently that, that is just hilarious in and of itself because, ha ha, Nick Cage, ha ha ha. So for Bill and Ted's excellent adventure, they asked this question, and this is the answer. I'm going to create a new character. I'm going to create one that they
Starting point is 00:30:55 go back in time to pick up and then they realize, nah, fuck this guy. I want Nicholas Cage to play Rasputin. All right. So now he's decided to change the rules and he says, oh, what I would do is I would have a whole other historical character within this movie and it would be Rasputin. So that's fine. It's not funny or interesting in any way, but the dummy on the show doesn't know who Ras is, cannot wait to school you with their knowledge. And again, this is supposed to be a comedy show. I don't understand why this got left in the show. Who is racepucin? Respucin was one of the most universally hated figures in sort of like Russian history.
Starting point is 00:31:38 Yeah, he was just like unkillable, but it was during the rising and the entire royal family were murdered and there was always the rumors that the youngest one of the youngest daughters Anastasia actually managed to escape one of the princess Anastasia's escape But that's now been proven she didn't and that's just defable and some woman came out but much later and said you know I'm her it's like they're not Resputin was their very creepy weird-looking advisor. Oh, they call them a Mr. Man or something like that.
Starting point is 00:32:05 I think he'd call himself a priest or something, but he was just a really creepy, weird dude, had like long hair, looks, or really, just shivered in a few minutes. And like they tried to poison him, and then they ended up shooting him three times, and then dumped him back in his house, made him look like somebody broken,
Starting point is 00:32:18 and shot him like they just hated him. You're fucking know all about this shit. Okay, that's the longest they talked about anything. Was Rasputin, they had all... They had all... Huk out their knowledge of this fucking historical character. Oh, you don't know where Rasputin? Well, I know that he did this, and he did that, I know about this and this.
Starting point is 00:32:36 Who gives a shit? So these poor fucks, these poor fucks, so that's kind of not that interesting of an talk of on that sort of a podcast, but imagine having to explain that to somebody who doesn't even give a shit as a human being. Aside from the podcast, his wife clearly doesn't know who this is. She doesn't care about history. She doesn't give a shit about anything. So the two of them, Sam and whoever their guest is, explaining this to her, where they clearly care. It's like if you were talking to your cat or something, you know, when you put your cat in a carrying bag and titter to the letter something and the cat is just it's looking out outside of the Box just at the world, but doesn't understand it. I imagine that's how it looks like when Stacy looks back at them as they're explaining this shit to her like Okay, so yeah, he was a dude in history. All right, but it's so funny to me because they're supposed to be talking about movies. They don't talk about the movie for that long at any point in any of these shows,
Starting point is 00:33:30 but they know one thing about a guy and someone else doesn't know and they have to explain it for 17 minutes. Oh, you don't know where I was peeing this. All right, so let me just go back off. He was born in 1838. Like, whatever, cares. Yeah, that's just like I said, that's the, that's Sam's real side coming out where he 1838, like whatever cares. Yeah, that's just, like I said, that's Sam's real side coming out where he went, oh fuck, somebody asked,
Starting point is 00:33:52 I get to talk about something that really matters in real life, finally, my stupid wife, inadvertently give me an excuse to talk about something interesting, not bullshit movies. I recognize a question to, where would you put Nichol's cage in a movie? And she does the same
Starting point is 00:34:06 Cop out bullshit for that question too in Mad Max where she just goes Oh, I make him one of the background characters. Maybe one of the war boys. Oh, that's the worst answer Do say something funny. That's the worst answer maker. Make him the female lead That's an interesting answer. You can have fun with that Yeah, and explain it. Don't just say, oh, you know, I hate be the boom operator. I don't know. You'd be the key grip of the game.
Starting point is 00:34:33 Right. What's the point of asking who he'd be if it's just an extra? Who wouldn't it cage me an extra? Move it on. What else you got? What's the next question? What are we doing? Are we just trying to get through the questions
Starting point is 00:34:45 as quick as possible? Because I would enjoy that, I would appreciate that, actually, now I think about it. So going back to this long explanation on Rasputin, it's funny that when they do bring something up, that should be explained, they can't. So the question comes up about what other time travel movie, because there's a lot of Bill and Dutz,
Starting point is 00:35:04 what's another great time travel movie? and the lake house gets brought up. For those of you that don't know the plot of the lake house is basically Kiano and Sandra Bullock sort of for love and then they they're what they'd write leaders to each other or some shit and emails or I don't know some of them. They live in the same house. They live in the same house. They're like four years apart and that's the twist day. That's the whole explanation of the plot of the same house. I live in the same house. That's just the time. They're like four years apart. And that's the twist, eh? That's the whole explanation of the plot of the Lake House.
Starting point is 00:35:29 This is a movie, aficionado, explaining to us. If you haven't seen the Lake House, it's kind of Reeves, it's Sandra Bullock, and there's an email exchange. Like, wait, what? I've seen that movie. That's the worst explanation of that movie I've ever heard of my life
Starting point is 00:35:47 You didn't understand this at all or you forgot Which is fine. We don't explain it on your podcast So this guy really really picked a terrible podcast for him and his wife to do Can you imagine watching the movie with the speech? No, she's one of those cons that you take to the movies and she just keeps staring at her phone during the movie. Yes. She's one of those people you can tell. Oh, insufferable. And then you decided to make a pop gas with this bimbo under dumped friends.
Starting point is 00:36:14 They ask her, so have you seen Ghost in the Shell? It's one of those generic takes place in the future. It's some futuristic steam, not steam punk, but whatever the fuck they call it. I have not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. I've not. they call it. I have not. I've played Runner, but anime. Okay, I haven't seen it. Imagine Blade Runner, okay, point is, his husband asks, her husband asks, so you have all this future tech. Humans are getting augmentations, you know,
Starting point is 00:36:36 a joke in the movies that one of the guys got himself a robot liver, so he could drink as much as he wants. So the question is, what would you get, Stacey? And that's my clip three. Listen to her answer. Right. And thus, future, lots of people are able to get parts of their bodies cybernetically enhanced.
Starting point is 00:36:54 So my question is, what would you get cybernetically enhanced first? Eyes, because I don't want glasses anymore. You want to look like that dude in the movie? No, not like in, I would want like natural looking eyes. It's a natural eyes that don't want glasses anymore. You want to look like that dude in the movie? No, not like him. I would want like natural looking eyes. It's a natural eyes that don't want quite glasses. Yes, exactly. So, but hang on, I'm gonna go, that's the first thing I'd want done.
Starting point is 00:37:16 But then I'd just go for boobs and butt. Oh yeah. Oh, no. Yeah. Ugh, so, okay, so first I was sorry, my bad. That's the guest asking the question. Ugh. So, okay, so first of all, sorry, my bad. That's the guest asking the question. My point is she has all this future tech at her disposal and her answer is that she would like
Starting point is 00:37:32 to get LASIK and a boob job. Right. You can get that today, asshole. These are things you're gonna live in, like, too. That's a good point. I can't live. Probably cram both of those operations in a single day if you have the money
Starting point is 00:37:45 that you don't have to be in a movie reality for that. Holy shit, you could have said anything like I wish my ass shot rockets. No, yeah, I don't like wearing glasses. I just want to point out, I was listening to this podcast with a couple of co-workers who are on a business trip earlier this, driving a Montreal and we're listening to the show and the thing that I didn't even point out, but my co-worker did was, this is just an excuse for them to talk about themselves.
Starting point is 00:38:15 This question, they valed under, yeah, you know, this movie deals with this. So anyway, what do you think and what would you do and what's your favorite and what do you think who gives a shit? These people are in celebrities. I don't care about them Here's a perfect example because they all bring their own sets of questions to the show And I believe the guest or maybe it's Sam. Who knows they all sound the same as New Zealanders But he asked this question and this is going to I listen to the hangover and this question, and this is going to, I listened to the hangover, and this is questioning a test.
Starting point is 00:38:47 What's one family heirloom that you would be horrified to discover the next day that you had given to Astrippa? Okay, what's a family heirloom you'd be upset about if you found out you were drunk and gave it to a stripper? Now, can you imagine a more boring question? Because what are you gonna say? Oh, you know what, my grandma, who came over from Holland, she actually brought her, like, whatever, who cares?
Starting point is 00:39:13 Who gives a shit? So, not only is it a terrible question that's gonna lead to boring answers, but these are possibly, and like you said, they know these questions, they write them down ahead of time. This is possibly the worst two answers you've ever heard. First, let's hear Stacey's answer.
Starting point is 00:39:28 My family's not, we don't have elums. I just, we don't do that shit, so. Okay, great, good one. And then the guests out of the show. They're not playing the game. Yeah, just nothing. God. Just makes up the go-up, it's too long.
Starting point is 00:39:42 It's too long with that. She's like family heirloom. You can get like, well, even if I did, I could just go back to next day and ask for it. Yeah, I mean, I mean, if we're hanging out the next day, I just think, hey, by the way, I shouldn't have given that to you. Okay, great.
Starting point is 00:39:58 I said, all right, so then the guest side of the show has his answer. Why don't, why don't have any family heirlooms? I mean, you know, there's not a lot of stuff that got passed down because you know my house isn't a museum. All right so there was a terrible question and possibly the two worst answers possible. This is a show that it's edited to its life and that was all left in. Why? I thought I got this poor fucker so again Sam sits there asking this question and both of them go well, we don't have heirlooms
Starting point is 00:40:25 There's nothing on Jesus Christ you guys and Kaya I just want to let Sam know you could have made that episode 19 questions. No one knows It's fine. Just taking the whole thing out No, but like you mother fuckers. I was made for 20 questions. I heard was 19 I couldn't even keep track of how many questions there were. Doesn't matter. Uh. And then on this episode, the hangover, they do the thing that I hate the most the podcasts do,
Starting point is 00:40:55 where they celebrate drinking alcohol as they're podcasting. And they've done this a couple times on their show. They think it makes them funnier or more interesting. It does not. Ha, ha, ha, ha. All right. Yeah, we'll finish them now. Who cares? Cheers. Do I want to hear people drinking and doing shots on a podcast? Yeah, it's just a hangout thing. It's a hangout thing.
Starting point is 00:41:19 Hangout simulator. But even then, okay, I I've said previously I kind of get the point in those if you just want noise on the side That's what that's about what like Netflix is and what they built their empire on is people putting on shit just on the side Yeah, right. They don't really sit down and watch fucking dear white people or whatever the hell Netflix has these days I get it, but this is such a boring show Even then what even on the side, this is just as good as not having anything on. And then I didn't come across any episodes
Starting point is 00:41:51 where they drink, but I imagine they are unintelligible. It doesn't get funnier. That's a very thick, and there were points where I just didn't know what the fuck they were saying. So they told us 10 real quick. Time out, Time out. Time out. I knew this was going to happen.
Starting point is 00:42:07 I was waiting for it. I was waiting for Kay and the big fun of the New Zealand Blue Daddy's system. I knew it. I knew it. These fucking assholes with their thick accents. No one can even understand them. All right. You have a clip called Mushmouth Retire.
Starting point is 00:42:21 Let's play that. New Zealand approval. So you know, regardless of whether you like this movie or not, if a newb is sitting at home and their boyfriend girlfriend is like, it needs to go away, it's going to miss you. What are you saying? Newed Feet, or if they've been, if you get out, because there is, you know, I at least try to speak English. This doesn't sound like English to me at this point.
Starting point is 00:42:44 I can't imagine what this asshole sent it like when he was 10 shots in. It's funny because you sound like English was your first language compared to these assholes. There were many times when I didn't understand what the fuck they were talking about. And it's not just a New Zealand thing. I think they're just dumb.
Starting point is 00:43:00 I think they're just dumb people. I could be wrong. I'll be honest, until you told me what their names were today, I didn't even know. I couldn't understand them. I only figured out because I was doing research on the internet. I had to see it written down somewhere in order to figure out who they were. And okay, so to that point, also, more of a tangent, but whatever. Getting back to Stacey being a goddamn bimbo.
Starting point is 00:43:29 Yeah, complete clip five. This is her talking about Elon Musk and how he's like Jesus or something. Someone else I find completely fascinating. Elon Musk. Now, if you don't know who he is, who's the founder of SpaceX, also the founder of Tesla.
Starting point is 00:43:44 So, Tesla cars, and a solosity who provides the batteries and technology that support that. Now, this guy puts everything on the line. He's got skin in the game and he just believes that we must move to Mars, that's the only move for humanity. And I just find that completely refreshing and fascinating in today's world.
Starting point is 00:44:05 What? Refreshing and fascinating. I listen to this and all I could think is that Elon Musk does not have the monopoly on the desire to explore space. You don't want to be astronauts. He just acts the money. We all want to go to Mars. We're all at the edge of our seats waiting.
Starting point is 00:44:23 What if there is life on Mars? Some sort of micro bacteria. Plus so. Teasla. Teasla cars. Teasla. Teasla. Fuck. This sounds like... It's like...
Starting point is 00:44:34 It's something to have some sort of dialect. It's another to go Teasla. Yeah, it's not even close. I thought he owned a third company when she said that. I'm like, well, you know, I know about SpaceX. I know about Tesla, but there's a T's lot to. What's that thing, make? I want to know about it. Plus, I want to point something out about Elon Musk. She says, this is the guy who thinks we need to go to Mars. He'd be the last person on that spaceship. He's a billionaire in LA. He's the last person. That's a good point. He's fucking every hot chick there is. He's living the life. Do you think he wants to be on Mars right now? God no.
Starting point is 00:45:10 He's like, see you guys. Have fun. Dude, he's gonna put 10,000 guinea pigs on those rocket chips before he steps foot on one. Okay. Are you insane? Yeah. He's just footing the bill and he has a general.
Starting point is 00:45:22 I get it. I don't think he fakes his interest interest in space travel and all that shit, but Neither are the rest of us. What do you mean it's unique as if the rest of us are sitting here like man? Earth is so cool. I hope you never go to the moon again Oh, man. I want to talk about Gidget comes on the show on this Bill and Ted episode. And we've well documented now that Sam and Stacey are idiots. So Gidget comes on and she has to show who superior intellect. They asked the question, if you could travel in time, where would you go to?
Starting point is 00:45:59 And this is Gidget's answer. Okay, question 13. What period in history would you two most like to visit? I'm torn. So one of them would be, and it's one of my favorite movies, one of my favorite composers is Wolfgang Amadass Mozart. I want to go back and see him perform his symphony number 25 in J. Marner. You're that nerd. A bunch of god damn nerds. She wants to seeart. She wrote that down in preparation. Oh, yeah. Just to sound smart.
Starting point is 00:46:27 Oh, for sure. So she says, oh, if I could go through time, I'd go back and watch this thing that could easily go watch any Philharmonic Orchestra do today and probably be tuned better and it would have better acoustics. Whatever, it's fine. That's her thing that she wants to do. But then she goes on to say, this is the other thing that she would do. I'd like to go back to prehistoric times.
Starting point is 00:46:46 Way back to early man, I'd like to know where the missing link is. I'd like to be just that process of evolution and see what happens and take a video camera and just film it all. All right, so a couple of things I want to point out. Let's just try, yes, thank you. So just try to sell it smart.
Starting point is 00:47:01 So I want to discover the missing link and film it. Tell me, the missing link didn't happen over a weekend. You're talking about evolution, you know, evolution works, you can't film that. It's not a film of the world. What, what is she gonna do? Stick around for a hundred thousand years and watch them slowly evolve.
Starting point is 00:47:20 Is she gonna watch the first, people of the two different species fuck? Like, oh, this is how it happened. There's the missing link, there's the baby. It's gonna stick around for nine months. Even time left photography, you could watch, I don't know, a plant grow or something that might take weeks.
Starting point is 00:47:37 But you're talking about thousands of years of evolution. You wanna go back and videotape it? That was the dumbest thing I've ever heard. That's a terrible answer. I'd rather go back and videotape it? That was the dumbest thing I've ever heard. That's a terrible answer I'd rather go back and watch Mozart's operas than try to figure out how I'm gonna watch evolution occur But she's trying to sound smart. It's not even a selfish. It doesn't even a fun selfish answer because So presumably she's gonna film this or something and then watch show it to the world No one's gonna believe you if you're gonna go back in time, no one's ever gonna believe you
Starting point is 00:48:06 fucking anything. So what? Once your back I mean. So at least do stuff that you would personally enjoy. Just say I would fuck the queen of England's back in the 1800s or something. Oh that would be that would stick. So keep this in mind, Gaya. That would smell so bad. Keep in mind that this is a podcast about Bill and Ted's excellent adventure and she's talking about filming Darwinism, whatever the fuck you do that. So then they finally fast forward to hitting the hard-hitting questions that we all want to know. And finally, oh, this is the question that I can't help I want to know from you guys. What the hell does Missy build Steppemar Missy
Starting point is 00:48:48 and Bill's dad? I mean, legit. Like she's a hot young thing, Bill's dad honestly looks like he's a crusty old dude. You're like local office accountant or something like that, he's just not. Oh, fucking cares. I mean, Sam, what do you see in Stacey?
Starting point is 00:49:04 Yeah, that's a good question for you. That's a good question. We finally get back to the movie Cares I mean Sam what do you see in Stacy? They finally get back to the movie and it's just the dumbest shit They have these random things. I don't know why people in New Zealand Care about American pop culture. So goddamn much. There was an episode where we're listening to where they were talking about Obama And they were talking about Trump, and if they could vote for Obama, and I'm like, why are you so obsessed with America? This doesn't make any sense, but then they get very excited about this.
Starting point is 00:49:33 You know what's interesting, too, the actor that played Napoleon Bonaparte is an actor called Terry Gamalieri. He's actually Australian. Oh, really? Yeah, he's an Aussie dude. Who playing a French ghost? Oh, it's not Aussie dude who playing a French goose
Starting point is 00:49:54 The guy who plays Napoleon is from Australia neat You don't see guy who plays somebody isn't actually the person he's playing Is what she's saying wow fuck. Fuck me. You know what I would say, really? Scarlett Johansson isn't actually a Japanese robot. Okay. Fucking boring people. They're boring people. They should not have a podcast. I actually got a note from somebody when we tease this show.
Starting point is 00:50:18 I got a note from a fan who said, I really liked this show. And whenever I hear that, I always think, okay, well, there must be be some merit Maybe there's something Seriously though because if you like whtp, I assume you know you must have some good taste right? So I'm thinking okay, what is it about this show that's good? I couldn't find anything And I was looking for it. I was looking for something to say but at least I do this or at least there's this going on. This show is terrible. I don't like when people assess something that they've seen. This is going back to that
Starting point is 00:50:50 compliment saying once again. And this is Stacy, maybe this is Sam, I don't know, I didn't write down good notes, but I think it's Sam talking about how the jokes in Bill and Tad's didn't age well. The bad thing, Bill and Tads didn't age well. The bad thing, some of the jokes haven't aged well, some of them are a bit like, eh, okay. And my good thing is I really liked the sets. I think they did a real good job of actually recreating these historic environments. I hate when people make a statement and then don't elaborate on it.
Starting point is 00:51:21 I didn't think the jokes age well. Give me an example, what do you mean? What are you mean? What are you talking about? What's the point of saying that? If there's no substance to it? I thought the bad part about it was the jokes weren't that funny.
Starting point is 00:51:33 Well, you liked the movie. What was the thing that wasn't good? Well, then he goes on to say, but the sets were really good. And this is something that blows all their minds. It does feel like all around the world. So wherever they filmed it, I'm guessing they filmed it all in America, but like it looked like they were in that particular time.
Starting point is 00:51:51 Yeah, they did a pretty good job. This is a movie review podcast. Who doesn't understand how sets work. They're like, yeah, it looks like they were in prehistoric times and then they were maybe in Europe during the Renaissance. You're like, dummy! These are SETS! They weren't traveling to Europe! It's like if you raised a child in isolation and then one day told him, you know, all those
Starting point is 00:52:14 movies I've been showing you, those aren't actually real. Those are fake. That actor, he's an American at all, he's Australian. And that moon? No no that's actually a set in Hollywood what but it looks like the actual thing oh yeah I remain is real speaking of poorly aging though I mean to your purie's point you know what's gonna age purly is talking about Trump and Obama as if anyone's gonna give a shit eight years from now no kidding oh what else you got on this podcast? So you've seen Mad Max. I have. Play Clip 12 and you'll... Gachi so stupid, just play Clip 12 real quick. If you're living in this environment and water is such a commodity and obviously it's something you need for life, otherwise everyone dies. Why the hell are you just screwing around, driving around, going to places that are really dangerous
Starting point is 00:53:07 and you could actually die out there? You know, it's not safe to be out in the sand dunes and stuff like that. It just makes no sense. It just, it doesn't, it seems opposite to human behavior. Oh no. What a fucker there. Yeah, so in the movie, obviously,
Starting point is 00:53:24 Morton Joe owns the place where the water is, and she's gone, well, why would they ever leave that safe place, that safe haven? Yeah, why would, it goes against human nature car? Why would humans ever want to explore and conquer new territory and expand and reproduce? Why don't they just stay in the same cave that we were all born in?
Starting point is 00:53:43 You fucking idiot. Plus, it was a prison, that we were all born in. You fucking idiot. Plus it was a prison and they were escaping from it. That's the reason why all those people were then pursuing them to try to bring them back. I don't know why. No, no, no. She's talking about the regular war boys, the regular troops in this movie. Wow. They're going around driving around the desert.
Starting point is 00:54:03 Well, if you looked up from your phone, Stacey, it's kind of explained in this movie. Why are they going around driving around the desert? Well, if you looked up from your phone, stay see, it's kind of explained in the movie. There's like three sentences in the whole fucking movie that are spoken. You don't even have to really pay attention. It's not a complex movie. It's the poster cop apocalypse. Resources are scarce.
Starting point is 00:54:18 They're fighting for them. Don. And in the movie, so I fucking went back and pulled a couple of few sentences where this idiot should have been paying attention. This is the first 20 seconds of the movie Carl So it's all about the oil in the water. Who would have thought? That's kind of like, today. Oh, fucking asshole. And her husband then brings up,
Starting point is 00:54:51 you're right, why do they ever have to leave? And that's Cup Thirteen. It seems as if it was out of the box. They've got three cities set up. Why don't they just have one? Transport everything to where the water is, because that's clearly the most important thing that you get from the ground. The other the other ones What the bullet town and gasoline guy in the oil? Yes, I suppose the oil is an alarm But yeah, that's interesting. What about you, Sminky? Right, so there's the bullet farm which presumably is some sort of a Place where they produce ammunition or they have a metal mine, right some sort of iron mine
Starting point is 00:55:24 Yeah, and the other one is the gas farm, whatever the fuck they call it. Well, this might just be a parallel universe, Mad Max, you know, Carl, where perhaps they have devices, facilities maybe even where they can somehow it's extract fossil fuels from the earth. However, these pockets of oil are only available in certain places on earth, so they can't just move the factory to where Immortan Joe's place is. Maybe they have to drive in between.
Starting point is 00:55:54 I can't keep up with this. It's too much. Even at the end, he goes, oh yeah, you're right, they do have a gas farm, don't they? I guess they would have to drive back and forth. That does make sense. But worry not because Stacey is here to solve all of those problems. Thanks to her, you know, all of these gangs and madmacks that are fighting over territory and the few resources that they have, she's going to solve all of those problems that's cooked nine. They need to use the elements that are available to them in this world. And there is heaps and heaps of sand and heaps of wind and they should harness those and make some power, some solar power and wind power. So no, because what this would do is this would de-centralise the control from the other towns.
Starting point is 00:56:45 You wouldn't need gas and you wouldn't, you could look at harnessing water as well from rain and whatnot. So then you wouldn't need the water town. So it would desert. Oh shit. Harness to rain. Desert. What a fuck.
Starting point is 00:56:59 Where there's nothing but drought and people live as slaves to the dictator just to get a cup of water every once in a while. She wants them to harvest rain, built windmills because you can just create those from thin air and have solar panels. But Kayak, going back to your original point, these are boring people,
Starting point is 00:57:21 trying to put pot holes in the movie Mad Max. If you go to that movie with your friend and afterwards he's pointing out plot holes, stop being that person's friend. That's not the fucking point of this movie to figure out why I don't know if this post-apocalyptic world would actually exist in this specific reality. Whatever! It's just a fun rub! There's a guy playing electric guitar on a moving vehicle for no fucking reason
Starting point is 00:57:47 Other than it's cool. It's just fucking cool. That's huge speakers. He's jamming out. Who gives this shit? No one's trying to figure out why would they power the electricity to this guitar? They could have used that energy for more gasoline. It's crazy. The whole thing's fucking crazy. Who cares? It's not. The whole thing's fucking crazy. Who cares? Is that fun with that? Where did they just drive T's like cars? T's like more. It's not just that. It's also these aren't plot holes. She's just going, why are they driving around the desert?
Starting point is 00:58:15 Everything is a desert. What are they supposed to do at all? She's so stupid and then she goes on to playclip 7. How long would you guys do 5 in this movie's world? I wouldn't last very long at all like maybe 5 minutes. I agree with that. No shit. No shit. Sitting there. Where is this isn't very green? You're producing so many greenhouse gases, don't you know? The very thing is is that the way she would die in that world is getting her ass beaten because she'd be talking to a bunch. Again, Stacy, I don't know if you've noticed, but everything in this movie is about resources, even the human beings, like the all the pretty women in this movie, you know, the central plot point
Starting point is 00:58:56 where they're trying to escape, more than Joe's treating them like objects. Well, that's all I have for this podcast, podcast. I'll be honest. That's it. Let me just hit a couple other points. We've gone on way too long about it. Yes. I was trying to keep this short, but it's impossible. It's impossible to keep these things short. Listen to how this episode about the movie, Beheaming Rhapsody starts off. And I mentioned before, the word I use is uncomfortable. Welcome, good people, to our podcast of Bohemian Rhapsody. This is movie reviews in 20 cues, Sam's our host, and I'm singing tunes, and if you don't like it, it doesn't to you, me. Holy shit, Munchy!
Starting point is 00:59:49 I think that does a good job of explaining where we're at with this podcast. These are amateurs who suck at podcasting. It's not funny and we've wasted way too much time talking about it. They're just so like hyenas. I feel bad for Sam, but you're doing it to yourself, man. funny and we've wasted way too much time talking about it. There's a soul like hyenas. I feel bad for Sam, but you're doing it to yourself, man. Hey, listen, get it divorced or something. Sam made his bad.
Starting point is 01:00:13 Sam made his bad. He's sleeping in it. It's not my issue. Yeah. I want to give a quick, stuttering John Melendez update because if you're a member from last week, Centering John has started doing this new thing where he has a disclaimer that he says,
Starting point is 01:00:29 beginning of his podcast, that explains you cannot pull a customer's podcast and play them on your show. And I was given word, I don't listen to Centering John, but I was given word from our listeners that he's already abandoned that technique. So he put out a show on September 10th and never made any point about that,
Starting point is 01:00:52 which is funny because I think we pointed out on our show that there is the fair use clause and saying that doesn't help you in any single way. So then I listened to his episode from September 11th and he starts off the show once again with this disclaimer. And then he also has some weird legal threats against me that he kind of mass a little bit. And I can tell that he reads our subreddit because one of the things that we were crushed
Starting point is 01:01:23 on last week was saying copy written which is not a word it's a copyright and it's copyrighted and I was this was pointed out to me because it's not yes not like the word right he wouldn't say written so John Melendez in this even crux himself so I can tell that he's also reading the same reviews that I've reading on our subreddit. Yeah baby, welcome to the Stuttering John podcast. Let me just start off by what my attorney told me to say. This podcast is copy written under Kotlin.
Starting point is 01:02:00 This podcast is copyrighted under and subject to the laws of the United States. John Melinda is 2019. Thank you, Mike. And don't worry, Lenny. We're going to do what we're going to do, like we talked about. Anyway, that's my New York attorney. That's right. That's right, Rice.
Starting point is 01:02:18 How are you, Rice Deorazio? Hey, my attorney's Lenny. Yeah, I got, I got, I got two that are very dear friends to me. Very dear friends. And in our mind, they don't mind doing me some favors. So his attorney Lenny from New York is gonna do him some favors. And they gotta do what they gotta do. So obviously this is not so much a thinly veiled threat
Starting point is 01:02:42 but just a threat against myself and W-A-T-P, which I find extremely amusing. This is the guy who's threatened to break my legs. He's threatened to take me out. And I'm excited about this idea that there's going to be some type of lawsuit because I've talked shit about him on the internet. There's a precedent set for this. Are you aware of that, Kaya? I could imagine is it a show you're going on tomorrow? Yes, it is. I, we talked about this that time. There was this thing called the lawsuit where Maddox sued Dick Masterson for talking shit about him. And it was thrown out of court with prejudice, meaning he has not allowed to ever bring
Starting point is 01:03:27 that lawsuit back again. And so I did reach out to Dick about this and I'm planning on going on his show tomorrow to talk about what could possibly be the lawsuit part two, which is, uh, make sure to make sure to have a Patreon ready by the time the files are all filed and delivered to you. No shit. You want to milk this one? That's a good point. I know. A bunch of assholes, man, suing people for making fun of you. And we're a show that we've shown time and time again that if you get it and you have fun with it, you could be a part of it.
Starting point is 01:04:09 Kaya is a co-host on the official podcast, a podcast that we made fun of. He was so excited, he played clips from it, he's come on the show multiple times, since then, Doug from Who's Right, we've had time, even Dick Masterson, we made fun of the Dick show. He's been a co-host.
Starting point is 01:04:26 We've shown examples time and time again that it's a roast, and if you take it real seriously, it doesn't help you out in any single way. I don't understand that angle. Even a, even Pat, the show you reviewed last week, the host took it kind of gracefully on Twitter. I saw a tweet he made. Yes, Pat, oh, it was really cool about it.
Starting point is 01:04:45 He did talk about it. Right. And you ripped, yeah, you ripped into him more than you have into any bond recently. That was good for him. It's not even defamation or anything like that. I understand those issues, which is a completely separate thing. If you were going on here and saying, you know, Stuttering John's actually a rapist. He molested me when I was working. Wow. Whoa. Whoa. Oh, guy. Hey, whoa.
Starting point is 01:05:10 No, I'm saying that will be a separate thing. All you're doing on your show is saying, look at this goofy Stuttering dumbass. That's it. What an idiot. That's what's to someone for that. That's what's to. Or using your stupid podcast.
Starting point is 01:05:22 That's what's so funny about this is the only thing I've ever said about Centering Giants that he's an idiot and that his podcast sucks, which I've done nothing but proven that those points time and time again. I would love for this to go to court. I'd love for us to play the audio clips in front of John and his attorney to say, all right, and what point
Starting point is 01:05:41 was Carl Lydig about any of this? Let's play the evidence that he's put forth for us. But yes, you're 100% accurate on that. Some might say exactly right, that I have never done anything that would be considered slander, there's nothing that's doable that we're doing. But I do wanna put this out there, and I know I'm putting myself out there with this,
Starting point is 01:06:04 and I'm hoping this doesn't fail miserably But to anyone who's listening to my voice who enjoys doing song parodies I am asking for stuttering John podcast song parodies Anything that has to do with John's failing podcasts that sucks balls that nobody listens to I'm sure Jen from the Jingo's department would love to get involved in this and anyone else who can do that sort of thing. Start sending those in WATP show at gmail.com. Send those into us. We'd love to play those on the show. I think we could have a lot of fun. And like you
Starting point is 01:06:41 said, going on Dick Masterson tomorrow looking forward to talking to him about this whole idea that making fun of someone on the internet is somehow a legal issue. It's not as fucking sad. These people used to be at the top of their games. O.P. the sky, all on their own shows and now you have them replying to no offense but internet no buddies, right? Which is not something of famous and happy person does. You don't see Joe Rogan in the YouTube comments replying to the hate messages oh yeah buddy well you know what let alone addressing the digitals on a show like I'm gonna sue this YouTube comment or really it's so pathetic it just shows that you have nothing going on in your life if that's what you're concerned with.
Starting point is 01:07:25 And poor John, I mean, honestly, John, you're an untalented hack and you know that. It's okay, we all know that. It's not a big deal. You don't have to pretend that you still have a career in Hollywood. You don't. It's okay. No one's upset with you about it. Do you think it's because they just are that new to the internet? So because back in there, I guess they received hate phone calls and sometimes snail mail,
Starting point is 01:07:54 but now with the internet being so ubiquitous under every single thing that they post, there's a hundred comments where anybody can say anything with ease. And so it's maybe they just notice it more now. Whereas before it, everything went through their manager. They never even heard of any hate. And now it's just comments upon comments. They're email inbox getting filled with people making fun of them. Maybe they're just not used to it. It's hard to get used to. I'll be honest with you.
Starting point is 01:08:21 If you ever read YouTube comments, it's rough. People don't go on YouTube to tell you that they're enjoying what you're up to. Yeah, but there... Oh, YouTube is a fucking... YouTube is a toilet, but I'm saying people have been in the showbiz for so long It should be used to all this shit. Even I, a fucking zealist, e-celebrity, got the install, the hate I got on the internet, I can't...
Starting point is 01:08:44 These people have been in the industry for like decades. And you're still upset that somebody called you a stuttering moron? It's surprising. It really is. So send in your song parodies for Stuttering John. We'll be happy to play them. All right. It is time for
Starting point is 01:09:28 I wasn't an opi radio we were talking before about how Joe Rogan doesn't go on and get but hurt about people's comments. And it's, we've documented on this show famously that O.B. did a YouTube video asking Joe to be on a show and pathetic. It's not just asking, it was passive aggressiveness. Not even passive aggressive. It was downright aggressively. Why the fuck are you not coming on my show? Joe? Yes.
Starting point is 01:09:49 So I wanted to think, I want to point out that I was listening to, I mentioned I was traveling to Montreal. It's coming back from Montreal on Wednesday. And I'm listening to Joe Rogan talk to Bill Burr, who's one of my favorite comedians. And they spent a good 12 minutes talking about Opian Anthony and reminiscing about the times that those two guys would go on Opian Anthony show and some of the antics they were
Starting point is 01:10:14 up to. I was like, oh that's cool. These guys are remembering how great that show used to be, which is also my memory of it. So I go this morning on Opi Radio to see what he's up to. Sure enough, he put out an entire episode, I believe it's number 140, that's just the clip of the Joe Rogan podcast where him and Bill Berk talked about OP and Anthony. There's no commentary around it.
Starting point is 01:10:40 OP doesn't drop in and say, hey, check this out. It's just Joe Rogan experience. and OP put it out as his own show Which by the way might actually be a copyright infringement There was no Review of it no discussion just the Joe Rogan experience on OP's feed Which is hilarious somehow somehow I don't think Joe was gonna mind very much He's not gonna go on his show like, you know, OP, I saw what you did.
Starting point is 01:11:07 I'm not gonna give you any attention because I know this is what you want, but I want you to know that I have a lawyer in New York. I have attorneys in New York. I have attorneys in LA. Yeah, I don't think Joe Rogan's gonna give a shit. It's fine. He's had probably 10 million listens to that episode already. It's fine. He's had probably 10 million listens to that episode already. It's
Starting point is 01:11:27 fine. So this is an episode where it's OP and Carl Ruiz again, and they go to our favorite place, Gebhards. But before they go to Gebhards or maybe while they're there, it's hard to tell. They decided to do a podcast from a construction site. We looked at each other and we're like, all right, it's time. You know what I mean? It's time to separate the herd and get the weak gazelle. Yeah. I go upstairs. He goes downstairs.
Starting point is 01:11:52 Where's there to go in that place? If you're with me, there's a gal everywhere. That is unaddeded. That is what Opie's podcast is. Even after we pointed this out to him for a year and a half that doing a podcast next to heavy duty vehicles backing up sounds like garbage he is still doing it sounds like he's in Turkey I should know if this I should stop my own shitty fucking too real to get edited podcast on my phone.
Starting point is 01:12:25 So, Kay, I like to, I like to act like I'm better than that. And I do, you know, have much better production values and our sound quality is so great. But I'm going to admit that early on in WATP's history, when it was just Kevin and myself doing the show, we didn't have a nice studio. And there were times when I would Podcast from a construction site So I'm gonna go ahead and play a clip. I'm gonna play a clip from back what we used to do that Just to prove that lesson O.B. We're in this together. I understand it's difficult and sometimes you are where you are when you're
Starting point is 01:13:01 Podcasting, okay, so I have a comment about that. I do think she does because it's very similar sound. What's play the theme song that people know we're talking about? I get it. It's tough. There's a lot of noise in the background. It happens. There's frogs, there's dogs barking. You never know. Again, to be fair, though, I some of your older ones are my favorites. The furcast specifically. Right. I know. I know. I kind of remembered that one right now. I do want to get back to talking about furries and bronies and some of the fun topics that we used to cover. And I think we're gonna get back to that a little bit next week. I have a, I do have a teaser this week, everybody.
Starting point is 01:14:09 West you think otherwise. Yeah, okay. You should do some sort of a ending parting gift for the broni community because from what I hear there, my little pony shows ending soon. Yeah. Well, and we're on suicide watch. I don't know anything about that. I don't know anything about that men with, I don't know anything about the
Starting point is 01:14:28 Barony community, but I do know that they go from season to season, not season to season, but they have different occurrences of my little pony. So this one might die off, but there'll be another one that comes out, you know, this has been going on since the 80s. I'm sure they'll be fine. Yeah, but there's going to be some infighting. You're like, oh, yeah, this re iteration is not as good as the next. Yeah, you're right. Fucking, they're not making enough runs out of this one. Just sitting over a kid's cartoons. They're obviously not well adjusted.
Starting point is 01:14:59 All right, so this episode starts off and OP explains that he tried to get the whole crew together. We're on 72nd Street. We're at he tried to get the whole crew together. We're on 72nd Street, we're at Get Parts on the Upper West Side Me and the Chef Carl Ruiz. We're waiting for Sharot Small to show up. This was supposed to be me, you Sharot Small, Vic Henley and Vic Henley tapped out quick. He's like, it looks like you got enough guys, you don't need me. So he just, he doesn't even come here. Oh, so Vic Henley doesn't even come here.
Starting point is 01:15:25 Oh, so Vic Henley doesn't want to go on OP show anymore. Gee, I wonder why. I wonder why Vic Henley wouldn't want to go on OP. I wonder if maybe it's because more people hear him getting made fun of by Austin, hear him telling his quote unquote jokes on OP. Right? I wonder if that's why he's passing on that opportunity. I don't know. I'm just throwing it out there as a
Starting point is 01:15:48 a possibility. I could be a rock Poor guy Carle Louise is getting so annoyed with OP Carle Louise goes out for a smoke break while they're hanging out at the bar Which is a great place to podcast from and Carl does not want OP to come outside with them because OP can't help himself he's gonna start interviewing people like a douche. You stay there because if not you're gonna start interviewing everybody.
Starting point is 01:16:13 Why can't I interview people? It gives me fucking stress and today's not the right day I will set this whole place on fire. Why do you get so stressed out when I want to talk to the people of New York City? Because you have a particular talent that makes things stuff, sir. Yeah, there it is. It makes things so your face is so arrogant. Oh, he does this thing where he takes his zoom recorder on in the street of New York and he just starts randomly talking to people and Kaya, you've been in New York City before, right? Sure. There's a ton of foot traffic.
Starting point is 01:16:45 There's all sorts of different types of people walking around. And there's one thing I know about people in New York City, they are mining their own business. They don't want to be bothered. They have shit to do. They're going somewhere. They don't want to talk to people especially a homeless looking OP with a zoom recorder Yelling out at people, but that's OP's big bit that he does
Starting point is 01:17:09 So Karlo is saying don't come out here. I don't want to ah fuck and OP gets into it. I'm guessing I always boo the I always boo the parking I'm in with a veterans hat and water filled legs this is going to be off But I boo the parking guys Cuz they're just ruining people's days. Hey, you want to be on my podcast? You want to be on my podcast? Well fuck you
Starting point is 01:17:40 Kaya, Jesus is this a set attempt for him to pull, you know, a sight, pedestrian's and a Little glimmer of hope in his eyes that maybe he'll get recognized. I think so. So I'm gonna go. Oh Aren't you OP? Oh my god. I think I think you might be on something there because he's making so much noise and so much commotion and he tells like an amateur yelling do you want to be like what about podcast? Do you sound like a lunatic? Next thing I know you're gonna try to sell me your rap CD that to buy for 10 bucks. No, I want nothing to do with your podcast dummy and I think you might be on to something that he's hoping to get recognized when I was down in New York few weeks ago I went on Anthony Kumya's show,
Starting point is 01:18:26 and then him and I traveled together on the train down to Chip Chipperson's show. And as soon as we got off the subway, we came up, he was getting recognized right away. Like, oh Anthony, what's going on Anthony? And I could see that, oh, this guy is still well known in this city, there's still has a lot of fans. OP walks around and yells at...
Starting point is 01:18:47 And the thing is getting fans cut up to be going, hey, Anthony, what's up, buddy? And he's like, ah, yeah, hey, what's up? OP is yelling at people and not getting recognized. He's trying so hard to be recognized. It's so sad. It's a signature line of a sad fuck is, come on my podcast, please.
Starting point is 01:19:03 Yeah, it's like something fans say to the people given an autograph to a photo at a convention or something. Thank you so much sir. I love your movies. I have a podcast about cats when you come on one day. And they have to like, yeah, just talk to my manager he's standing there. Send us a mail. It'd be one thing if it was Riley Reed standing there and you were yelling come on my podcast, but All right, that was an official podcast reference. Have you guys had Riley on yet? Is that happened? No, no, no, no, it is about porn stars. They're so flaky. Yeah, right. I'm off for sure What's the deal with that? We get I mean we get in contact then they just tell us, oh, I only have like 20 minutes. I could come on for just 20 minutes, maybe, and then they just never reply again.
Starting point is 01:19:50 I mean, I know we're not Joe Rogan, but it just, it's still kind of insulting because we're being respectful and nice to them. And then we just never hear back. 20 minutes, 20 minutes. All right. It's perfect. It's teenage boys. Yeah. This is perfect marketing for you. Just talk to our audience. It's our hundred thousand horny teenage boys
Starting point is 01:20:08 And you don't want to come on Yeah, so yeah, I have a trouble on my shoulder. What about it? I think 20 minutes or so I really read is probably 15 too many how many questions you really have to ask her I do not mean it's still I'm not gonna have I'm not gonna Chrissy mayor our podcast where we have her calling from a right two and a half minutes. Yeah, that's funny. Chrissy mayor ruining your podcast is way worse than Riley Reid ruining your podcast. And there's a specific reason for that. Okay, this is, OP is again, causing problems.
Starting point is 01:20:47 And this is a continuation of the clip I just played. But I have something to point out where Carl will be just getting very annoyed with him. You want to be on my podcast? Oh fuck you, Leon! OP. What? Why are you saying fuck you to people? I'm gonna want this guy to fight.
Starting point is 01:21:04 I'm out here. You're behind the rope. Like crazy. What's going on? Oh, I And I believe what Karol is saying right there because I've been with this girl at Concerts who starts problems with people the girls never gonna get punched. It's fucking me You don't want that girlfriend who's starting problems. You're like, hey dummy I don't want to fight all these people. I have nothing to do with them. Why are you yelling at them right now? Carre Louise is looking at these guys going you're yelling fuck you to people in the middle of Manhattan and I got a throwdown I don't I don't have any problems with these people. What are you doing? Not just that but remember nobody recognizes this guy so they don't know this is just oh here's OP He's trying to be funny. No all they think is that's a angry drunk
Starting point is 01:21:50 This restaurant has always has that angry drunk yelling at people at the front. What's that about? I don't know about let's avoid it. I don't want to get asked for money right at best. He's an angry drunk at worst He's a drug addicted homeless person. I Don't know that OP realize how he comes off. So I do want to point out that OP has learned a lot in the 15, 17 months podcast, whatever he's been doing. He learned that he does the podcast straight the entire time.
Starting point is 01:22:22 He can hit the pause button. All right, you know what, why don't we push pause, but, but the podcast listener won't know that we'll, we'll fire up one of those, uh, taking it up to speed things. He has come a long way. Oh, be that's my body. You can hit pause and it'll be seamless for the listener. It'll be like it, it never happened. It's amazing.
Starting point is 01:22:43 You know, it's not like radio. Doesn't have to be live. It falls in resume. You can even edit them post. Yeah, it's not dead air. If you hit pause, it'll seem like that time never existed. It's amazing. I pointed out that Suthering John said he was talking
Starting point is 01:22:59 to OPEE's producer. And yeah, to call with OPEE's producer and blah, blah, blah blah blah. And I was like Opie has a producer. What are you talking about? He's not even on Westwood anymore. And I had somebody tweet me and say, notice this guy, Mike Sappho, is Opie's producer and he sent me a link to his Twitter account. So I was like, oh,
Starting point is 01:23:19 okay. Well, I didn't realize that he had a producer. And guess what? New does Opie's producer because this happens I worked for myself a one-man operation and Mike Sappho helps me every once in a while He's been once again today, so I got the handheld this was supposed to come to the restaurant like hurry up Letting a little something out of the bag So this guy Mike Sappho who's suffering Johnisogout 2, he's like, yeah, I was talking to Obie's producer.
Starting point is 01:23:47 This guy doesn't even want to think of you with OP. He's not even helping OP out on this show. He's supposedly the producer. And OP's just being let high and dry with his Zoom recorder and he's just standing there like, fuck. All right, thanks for nothing. As usual. What does he need a producer for, first of all,
Starting point is 01:24:04 a single wall? Did he say, the need to produce her for first of all? It's good of all. Did you say, I need to help to get a handheld? What camera? No, we're talking about his. He's talking about his zoom recorder. The thing that he walks around with. Yeah, we record audio. What do you need help for that for?
Starting point is 01:24:20 You don't need a production assistant or something to loan you a recorder. You're a millionaire. You can walk into any electronics shop. I don't get it. Buy everything in it. I don't need a production assistant or something to loan you a recorder. You're a millionaire. You can walk into any electronics shop I don't get it. Buy everything in it. I don't understand. I don't know my god I don't know what a producer would do for OP show if I was his producer and he brought me back this audio I would say well we can't use any of this What would he let me to do with this? There's a truck backing up picking up garbage right behind your face
Starting point is 01:24:43 What am I supposed to do with this audio? I don't know what to do. Sheamus has better production. Sheamus has way better production and two camera angles on YouTube. Oh, sheamus. All right. So it's well documented that OP used to be on Westwood one and that he wasn't fired. They had a mutual separation because Kaya, that's how things work in life. Yeah, when you have an employer who pays you money, you both decide that I want you to stop paying me money. I'm gonna go off on my own and do my thing. So here's a little nugget that OP spits out
Starting point is 01:25:19 that might be a counter argument to that. Did you think Joey Silver will get mad if I do a guitar? Yeah, got it. All right, I'll open. We're not here. We're not here. We're not here.
Starting point is 01:25:30 I kind of miss Joey. Oh, I like Joey. I miss Joey. So Joey was the producer of the show back when he was at Westwood One. And Opie who says, yeah, it was time to move out. I didn't want to be with Westwood one anymore. Now he's going, ah, shit, I miss Joey.
Starting point is 01:25:44 He was actually helped my show out a lot. Like yeah, that's because you wish you were still out of Westwood Waddubby. It's because you were fired. You were let go of our Westwood Wad. Yeah, couldn't sell shit. So Opie's hanging out, staring at, and I didn't even pull these clips,
Starting point is 01:26:02 but there's tons of cat calling and, check out that check and that girls too thick Or don't get this girl. There's tons of that going on Which when you listen to a podcast is not entertaining in any single way. I can't see what you're seeing There's no video aspect to this So here's an example of Opie making a sight gag for all of us listening at home. Because it was close enough to a burger. Nicky, fuck him in aage on 72nd Street.
Starting point is 01:26:32 She just retired and now she's walking the streets. That's not Nicky in aage. Look like Nicky. Yo, Nicky in aage. So we saw some chick. What a great compliment. You look like the celebrity if she was retired. Yeah, I know what a what a hilarious joke that is well I was like Nicki Minaj. Oh, P you're being an autos. We can't see that we can't see you spurgging out in front of some stranger
Starting point is 01:26:58 We don't get it. We're not part of this joke that you're in right now and You're an asshole. You wouldn't hang up with a friend like this. Just randomly cat calling women while you try to have a burger. He's such an asshole. Yelling fuck you at people. For real. I have this quick clip that I want to play and this is really just for the good people of New York State.
Starting point is 01:27:21 If you live in the area where I live, you know about a beer called Utica Club. It's a beer that's made in Central New York and it's piss water. And Opie says this. You've never had a Utica Club? It's a really good beer, man. I don't know what he's talking about. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:27:38 Utica Club. I don't know why you think that's cool to say that. It's not cool. I just have a couple more things that I want to play about this show that's cool to say that. It's not, it's not cool. I just have a couple more things that I wanna play about this show and then we'll move on. If you remember when Carl Rewies opened his restaurant, La Cubana, he said to OPI, on OPI show, you know from day one whether you're gonna make it or not.
Starting point is 01:28:02 You can get a sense from the first day you're open, what's going to happen to the future of the restaurant? He said, I've opened over 20 restaurants and I know whether it's going to succeed or fail. And it's weird that OP has never asked him because my father would have been after they opened. What happened? What did you see? What do you think? What's going on? OP has never said that. So in this episode, I think Carol's not feeling great about things and this conversation ensues. You know, we're trying to get into the black now, but we don't know them.
Starting point is 01:28:35 You know, chances are, man, you know, it could make it or it could not make it. Right. Well, and I'm very, I don't know, I'm cool with it. You know what I mean? We gave it our all. You know what I mean? So hopefully, it'll make it, but I don't, that's why when you always ask me, do I get excited about things? I'm cool with it. You know what I mean? We gave it all you know what I mean? So hopefully it'll make it but I don't that's why when you always ask me do I get excited about things?
Starting point is 01:28:47 I'm like no right so this restaurant's been only been open for a couple of months It sounds like Carl's already decided this not it's not working out. It's not gonna happen and I feel bad about that. I think Carl's a good chef, and I think he's a funny guy But if his future is freed up come come on WATP, Carl. We'd love to have you got time. We'd love to have you on the show. Fuck the part is you just know that OP is rooting for it to fail because he was invited to the opening. Yes.
Starting point is 01:29:16 I'm sure in his head this restaurant must fail. So he can feel better. The only way OP has friends is if they're relying on him for financial support. And this is the sad state of OP is that he's not paying people to be on his podcast anymore because he has no advertisers, Westwood ones not behind it. So if it kind of is like, yeah, I'm good. I don't need to be on there. Shroud Small was supposed to be on there. He never showed up. And so, yes, of course, he's rooting for Karl Ruiz's restaurant to fail. He needs Carl to have one more free time and to need money. And I want to point out that when I say
Starting point is 01:29:56 Karl Ruiz, I want you to come on the show. When I say this about Bonnie McFarland as well, I don't think it's that much of a long shot. I think Carl Ruiz is listening to us, because he sends me little signals from time to time. And here's an example. I'll stop saying you guys, if these balloons start using geodering, how's that? Cause they find a stinker poo. I just want to zoom in on that.
Starting point is 01:30:19 What, Carl, what did you just say? These people find a stinker poo. They stink up who? It's like a drinky poo, but that's people who have body odor. They stink up who? And then later out of the show, we talked about Viagra, which I don't know if you have this in Turkey, but it gets your penis hard.
Starting point is 01:30:40 And he calls it. Don't need it, bro. Don't need it, of course. And he calls it this. You don't need it. bro. Don't need it, of course. And he calls it this. You don't need it. What are women wear in Turkey? Can you even see anything that's going on? No, no.
Starting point is 01:30:52 They dress the way they want it. To their credit, Turkish women are pretty attractive, actually. So no problem on that front. It's everyone else that's a problem here. Gotcha. So he does throw this out there. He takes a little Viagra Nuch and he gets in the fucking pocket. Vi. So he does throw this out there. He takes a little Viagra nuch and he gets in the fucking pocket. Viagra nuch, not even a comfortable phrase to say.
Starting point is 01:31:12 I know that that's a signal to WATP and Karu Ruiz, we're here, yeah. And we're ready for you to come on. Give us a day. We'll make it happen. Looking forward to a buddy. So I was gonna say since you were in New York anyway also, dress up like one of those parking meter people one day. Yeah. Just hanging around that restaurant, see if OP yells at you. Go on his part and just see if you recognize his
Starting point is 01:31:35 your voice. That's a good idea. I, if there's just any shift in his facial expression, like wait a minute, is that, is this that asshole who keeps a ripping on me. That'd be amazing. I had a guy in our subreddit say that our show is getting stale and he offered some suggestions on things that we could do and one of them was to go to Carl Ruiz's restaurant and then try to talk to him or something like that.
Starting point is 01:32:02 I'm not the desperate asshole who has to put myself out there. That's an old meass to do. That's what Cedric John has to do. I just put out a show and ask people to do crazy things like, you know, send us in, song parodies. It's a little different. You know, we're in a little different situation. Gotcha.
Starting point is 01:32:22 Sure. Kaya, I want to thank you again for coming on the show. You've been awesome. We've talked about, I mean, you listen to multiple episodes of this movie reviews and 20 cues, not an easy feat, not something that anyone would sign up for voluntarily okay voluntarily so I Appreciate that you've listened to me rant about settling John and Opie So you know what time it is right I Really don't that kind of just want to hear what you have planned for next week and I want to leave to be honest Yes. The T-Series.
Starting point is 01:33:04 The T-Series. That's right, Sam, for everyone's favorite part of the show, the segment we're listening to a clip from the podcast that we'll be reviewing next week on W-A-T-P. And here it is. This isn't for you listeners. This is just for, frankly, it's rude that you're listening in. This is a private conversation that I'm having with my wife in our home. We're on our penultimate episode of this terrible, terrible series. One left to go and I have to say, I think it's my favorite
Starting point is 01:33:42 episode of the season. That's a very low bar, but still. There's a lot of elements here that I'm like, where was this the whole time? And it starts right with my at first glance. Because the first thing you see in this episode are Scooby-Doo and Shaggy reminiscing on old mysteries, the that they've unmapped so far I would like to see it. Where were these mysteries? Okay, this is a podcast called Scooby-Doozer Scooby-Doozer a suggestion that came in from Jack Daniels and we were talking about
Starting point is 01:34:21 Some of the podcasts we used to do back in the day like GI Joe and my little pony. Yeah. I'm ready to get back to it. Let's get out of all of this, Hattie stuff with Stuntar and John and Opie radio. Let's talk about Scooby-Doo. Let's see what's doing with the old Scooby-Doo cartoon. The confusing part there was that for the first 10 seconds,
Starting point is 01:34:43 I was that sure that guy is gay. Yeah. And then he introduced his wife. So I think at this point, we can add a rule to the don'ts of podcasting is don't ever podcast drunk, don't ever podcast with your wife. I just it never seems to work out. Agreed. However, 100%. In fact, there's a show called How Did This Get Made?
Starting point is 01:35:05 I've mentioned it earlier. I'm a big fan of the show. And you have Paul Sheer and June Diane Rayfield, husband and wife, comedy duo on that show. I was getting multiple suggestions to play June Diane Rayfield as cringe of the week last week because she's been given so much power that she wrote a book about getting elected as a female and we have to all go against Trump and she co-wrote this fucking book and she sounds like such an asshole. It's the problem with the husband and wife dynamic of a podcast is that you have to give
Starting point is 01:35:43 up a certain amount of creative control in order to keep the marriage successful. It's not a good thing for a show. Yeah. Yeah, it's just I can't think of any examples of a successful one. All I can think of is your mom's basement, H3H3, where she would occasionally chime in. And the 20 cues movie release or whatever the fuck Yeah, keep your wife off your podcast or keep yourself off your wife's podcast. It clearly doesn't work Occasionally, I guess you could have her make a jingle, but So with that, Kaya, I want to thank you again for coming on the official podcast is where you can find Kaya and
Starting point is 01:36:26 coming on the official podcast is where you can find Kaya and all of his friends podcasting every week. Anything else or anything you want to plug my friend. No, but I'll give you the promise my girlfriends never gonna be on Mike. That's smart. Mainly because you can't speak English, but also because nobody wants your kindest girlfriend out of the show All right, and I don't want to getting harassed by a bunch of teenage shitheads, but yeah Play two reasons see there's reason apart. Oodles of good reasons not to do this to yourself Sam So please join us again next week. It might be the episode we find out once for a who are these podcasts? Sleep well every pony Of morning radio.
Starting point is 01:37:05 And now the show is closed right now. Fuck you! Okay, great show. Good job, everybody. Great job, everyone. Fucking thing, suck! This dude is fucking corn. Bullshit What? get it makes no sense. Okay, let's read some reviews from iTunes real quick.
Starting point is 01:38:08 And then we're gonna get the voice mail and then we'll get you out of here because you probably probably passed your bedtime at this point. Nah, I'm good. Okay, let's play. Let's guess what podcast these reviews are from. Oh, yeah, let's do that. I like it. This first one comes in and it's amazing exclamation point from Masonite aka Big Papa. And this one just came in today and it says, this is hilarious. The host is funny. Every co-host is good except
Starting point is 01:38:32 Andy's brother Joe. And the way they rip apart a podcast is merciless and hilarious. But I can't get more than three stars since Carl is a bills fan that's a three star review which is ridiculous that's what's the point of giving anyone a three star review it's like saying it's all right well then why why are we reviewing it that yeah you're not changing the average no point in it there's no point in it I lose two fucking points about bills fans of my fault Where live it sucks sucks enough All right, here's one talentless hack. This is also from today This is just an unfunny dude with more often than not even unfunny or co-host
Starting point is 01:39:17 I hope he goes the way a Brody Stevens That's a one star review Wishing for my suicide. That seems harsh. Yeah. And that's coming from me. All right. Here's one from Nick K. Gurd 1983. It's just dot, dot, dot, being practice. That's a five star review. Appreciate that. I should point out, I think these guys left some sort of a referral link or just tell us where they came from. Like, there's a fan of 20 cues.
Starting point is 01:39:54 This was bullshit. Some of them do, and I'm gonna read a couple where it's obvious where these came from. But I should point out, I'm only reading the US iTunes reviews. I'm sure there's tons of reviews out there that I don't even look at from other countries, from other sites. So if anybody wants to send them to me,
Starting point is 01:40:13 I'll be happy to read them because I'm sure it's just a fraction of what we're seeing. This one is from Stargazer 94 and it says, sad. It's sad that you're this miserable. Go outside and soak up some vitamin D. Maybe it'll make you happy. There's a one-sided review.
Starting point is 01:40:30 And then- Clipping on his computer in his room. Yeah. Not getting by. I know. I'm the one with the problem. And then this is from WS86J. And it is just a eye-rolling emoticon or emoji and it says I would love to see you take
Starting point is 01:40:53 on the MMP YMH, JRE or Killtony idiots and that's a one-star review. Oh, is that acronym? So MMP is Monday Morning Podcast with Bill Burr. Why am age, I believe, is your mom's house, which we did review. JRE is the Joe Rogan Experience, which we have not reviewed. And Kill Tony is a podcast with Tony Hinchcliff that is all the rage right now.
Starting point is 01:41:20 And apparently this person, this person knows comedy. Obviously, they're coming out all the good comedy podcasts and we suck. Alright this one's from Sailor Moon Girl 323 if I could give zero I would. Imagine having so much time on your hands that you create a podcast to rag on other podcasts. The use of sound effects are so obnoxious and the host is truly misogynistic towards female podcasters that are successful. Like it's 2019 and he's still gonna call people the R word. I read that word for word. There's a one star review and I'm telling you this is a morning. This is a morning
Starting point is 01:42:02 toast fan. The fact that we're making it was too, I know, it was too on the nose. It was too on the nose. I was missing, it's like, I'm triggered. I'm literally shaking. I know, the fact that she wrote, like it's 2019 and he's still gonna copy with the R word and that's a legitimate SJW writing that.
Starting point is 01:42:22 I didn't, yeah, it's honest. Here's another great one. This is from Tayman Pods. It says, these people are mean frowny face. And that is a one star review. I know. Who are these people? Who the fuck are these people?
Starting point is 01:42:39 I don't think people appreciate normal people listening to this, don't appreciate how difficult it actually is to leave One star review on places like iTunes you have to make an account Well, do you ever make an account on a website if you're not absolutely forced to do so I don't care I don't leave reviews for anything. I've never left a review for anything not even my own podcast I just don't care. I know I just don't care enough Here's another one from September 10th.
Starting point is 01:43:07 Wish I could give zero stars. Congratulations, you're capable of reading rude tweets and internet drama and trying to spin it as your own jokes Unoriginal and frankly rude not here for anyone who thinks it's okay to comment on women's weight That must be someone who heard why won't you date me? I imagine because that's always talked about his fat cheeks on that show. Fat shaming the healthy at every size bullshit that I think is making a comeback. Could because did you see Bull Mars talk about it now? How fat shaming isn't all that terrible.
Starting point is 01:43:43 I think he said this like last night or something and everybody collapsed on him saying, how dare you. Yeah. I think this is making a comeback. We should, let's do a fat, I don't know, some sort of fat show at some point. I like Bill Marr.
Starting point is 01:43:59 A fat cast or he's not trying to be PC. He puts the shit out there and his own audience turns on him and I give him credit for that because it's not trying to be PC, he puts the shit out there and his own audience turns on him and I give him credit for that because it's not many people are doing that these days. Most people are riding that line of, I don't want to upset anybody, I have fans, I want to keep them as my fans, Bill Martin doesn't give a shit. I like that. Yeah, no, nothing against Bill Mar. All he did was go on his show and said, you know, it shouldn't be this taboo to point out that being fed is not good. And people gave him shit for that.
Starting point is 01:44:32 Jesus. This is somehow making a comeback. All right. All right, so this is what next one says, not great. And it says, I'm down to laugh at jokes at the expense of podcasts I enjoy, trust me. But this is pretty dumb. Most of what they make fun of is out of context, or they actually just don't even know what
Starting point is 01:44:50 the podcast is referring to, why would they, if they aren't regular listeners. So it doesn't really land. Most of the inside jokes, the successful podcasters established with their loyal listeners, just go way over these guys heads. I also can't stand when women on podcast get bashed for having vocal fry. Sometimes it's true, but usually it's just men not looking the sound of a woman's voice. Things also get hard to listen to when they start bashing podcast hosts looks. Come on, that is definitely someone from the morning toast. And I was trying to figure out if there's a sub-reddit or something that's going Come on, that is definitely someone from the morning toast. And I was trying to figure out if there's a subreddit
Starting point is 01:45:28 or something that's going on where someone picked up on us. I couldn't find anything, but I know that we commented on their vocal fry and their looks. So I guarantee that's where that came from. And that's a one star, are you sure? That's a, oh, sorry, yes, that's a one star of you. A lot of one star of you is this week. I hate this attitude man every single time every time you meet a review to me of your show it's you don't know anything about the show and we listen to several episodes of these
Starting point is 01:45:55 shows what do you want for us to binge the entire show that's not put yourself in the shoes of somebody who is getting recommended a podcast so what would you tell them if you were a fan? Oh, so this podcast, you know, if you listen to only 10 episodes of it, it's, you know, you might get the impression that it sucks. But trust me, if you listen to all thousand of them, it gets good. Okay, I'll do it. If your show was good, you wouldn't need that. You can tune into any Joe Rogan episode, for example, and immediately you can tell to
Starting point is 01:46:23 a good quality podcast, even if you don't enjoy the topic or whatever, but it's well done. You don't have to go through all 1,500 of his fucking episodes to be able to have an opinion on it. I'll give you a perfect, such a cop out. I'll give you a perfect example of that.
Starting point is 01:46:37 When we were suggested the Dixho by somebody, I had never heard of Dick Masterson, I listened to the Dixho, and Vinnie Paulino and I reviewed the show and I said I like this show I think he's on to something something funny about this and there's nothing but inside jokes and references and I went back and listen to every episode of the biggest problem in the universe and then I went and listened to all the Dick show and it got better and better for me but I could tell it was good by listening to one episode just randomly. I knew there was something to it. There were funny jokes and were good points being made. That's what you want.
Starting point is 01:47:11 You don't want to have a show where it's like, well, you don't get it. You have to listen to 200 episodes in order to understand anything you're talking about. Well, then what are you doing? Then what's the fucking point? You're just arguing for Stockholm syndrome. You're telling me that I can't. Like, oh, you'll like this after continued exposure over long periods of time.
Starting point is 01:47:29 You know shit. You know shit. You may have done that to yourself, but I don't wanna. Right. All right, this next one is just wrong. A podcast making fun of their podcasts. Wrong.
Starting point is 01:47:41 This is a dumb podcast. That's a one-server view. Here's one that says, Ha-carl, this show hits you like a dot, dot, dot. That's from Tony Willow-Dillow. That's a five-server. Thank you, Tony. Here's one that says,
Starting point is 01:47:55 the official podcast from Mark Tantony. These guys are funny. Kaya, Charlie, and Jackson. Keep up the good work. That's a five-server on R. These guys are funny. Kaya, Charlie, and Jackson, keep up the good work. That's a five star review on your episode somehow affects us and helps us out. Either way I'll take it man. I will take it because I gotta tell you we're up to 574 one-star reviews at this point. Well ahead of our five-star reviews so even
Starting point is 01:48:43 it's just dumb people who don't know what they're doing, give us a five star review of your dumb, if you're an idiot, we'll take it. All right, this next one is untalented hacks to our exclamation points. And it says, if it isn't enough for somebody to put their time and effort into something, even if nobody will overhear it,
Starting point is 01:49:02 these jerks come and ran and everyone's macy's day parade. My ex was listening to OP radio segment during her fourth trimester abortion and Carl beating a dead horse dressed her out to the point of a miscarriage. Overall great show definitely recommend that's a five star review. This next one says Carl with a K slash Carl was the C is loud and obnoxious. This is from B movie PG 13. And they goes on to say, you should honestly just put a more reasonable host
Starting point is 01:49:35 on like Kevin or Kaya. And that is a five star review. All right. Yes, very good. Last one I'm gonna read. Question, why is OP show suggested when I look yours up five stars? I think I read that last time. All right, so the point is what I'm trying to say is that we are getting bombarded with one-star reviews again So please people if you're listening to the show just give us five stars and shit all over us and we'll read it
Starting point is 01:50:02 And I'll be fine and everyone will have a good time. It's fucking crazy, man. You can't even... I know. Like, straw man these people anymore. Any possible way that the first one that you read about that is 2019 and you're still using the Arsler. Yes. There's something that I would write if I wanted to parody somebody on the far left. I know.
Starting point is 01:50:22 I can't even do that anymore. It's real. It's still real these fucking people I can't even do that anymore. It's real. It's still real, these fucking people. Can't even say retard anymore. You know the whole, like this is an actual thing, they call it the euphemism treadmill where moron, idiots, retard, these all used to be actual medical terms, but then the rest of us we appropriated them to call our friends retards. And so the medical realm would stop using them. Fun.
Starting point is 01:50:46 I think there should be a rule. Like if you want to take a word from us, we have to get something back though. Yeah, right. Right. And have no insults. If I can't say the arslur anymore, can I call people disabled now? Is that cool as an insult? Kamala Harris, I believe, just took shit because she was talking in front of people and somebody said,
Starting point is 01:51:06 you know, our president right now is mentally retarded and she said, I agree. And they're like, oh, you can't use the R word, you just said that. And it's like, well, no, what they were saying is that a person that they don't like is mentally retarded, which is the proper terminology. Mental retardation is a real thing. It's fine. Right. It's a mean slow.
Starting point is 01:51:30 It's always meant slow. It's okay. But whatever. It's the R word. And if you even agree with someone who says it now, you get bashed. You were in the same room with somebody who said the R word. Oh, you should apologize for that.
Starting point is 01:51:44 Okay. I guess. Seems silly, but it's gonna be a fin. It's gonna be a fin. All right. All right, let's listen to some voice music real quick. This is a guy who called in who watched me on the Chipposon podcast. And I don't know if I talked about this or not I can't remember but there was a woman on there her name is Karen Fien and she was not a fan of me we sat next to each other and she
Starting point is 01:52:12 she ripped on me pretty good. Oh no I mean we back up real quick so this guy called in and told me that I sucked on Chip Show and that Karen killed me and crushed me and all this stuff. I didn't pull that voice down, but then he called me right back and played this. Here's a little song I want. I have one thing, it's not for not knowing. But you're a Thank you
Starting point is 01:52:49 So that's an example of a good voicemail, but okay, you're not allowed to laugh at that. That's the F Slur ride I can't believe you're not even allowed to play it. Oh, dear you Listen immediately. I didn't even listen to that. I had a time. I don't even know how I was able to set it up. I didn't even know that was happening. All right, here's the next voice now. Carl, I'm wondering, how do you go in a tired day every single day, not pooping at work?
Starting point is 01:53:19 Like you've never drank some coffee in the morning or something settled wrong And then you gotta hoop well away from home It just don't understand how you can do that. It's like a superpower. So we could share your sense with the me and the audience Be appreciated for you know That'd be cool not to you want to traveling for like 14 hours to Or maybe like when I'm on vacation for like like 14 hours to, or maybe like when I'm on vacation for like a week or two, not having a wait like it. Like if I could wait till I get home to poop instead of doing it on vacation, it's a thing that'd be really cool.
Starting point is 01:53:54 So let me know how you get your superpowers and yeah, follow that later. So I can answer that one. Please. The way you can control your bowels and you don't have to constantly run to the toilet is don't eat like a pig. That helps. Yes. That's a good point.
Starting point is 01:54:11 I'm not going to say that that's the secret to my success, but yes. Such a bizarre idea that I get the same shit because I don't like shitting in public toilets and all that sort of stuff either. It's not that I'm a germafil,. I just don't want my ass touching a toilet seat where it is pissing shit and then you know when you take a shit the water splashes up against your ass cheeks and your balls it's fucking revolting even when it happens in your own home let alone in a public toilet the your dick touches the front of the bowl, toilet bowl, the ceramic. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:54:46 Oh, god, you're fucking revolting. Puss, you're breathing in other people's shit particles. When you smell the shit particles in your nose, it's in your mouth. In your mouth? Yeah, disgusting. When I enter a public toilet, I don't even like being there just to take a piss.
Starting point is 01:55:03 I just want to get in and out as feisty as I can Without touching anything if that's even possible. I don't want to sit there and hoffing and puffing inhaling deeply squeezing a shit I held starting to sweat It's terrible. I don't know how these people have this idea that you have to shit every other I don't either have to I don't understand it like a a human you fat fuck. I probably have already said this, but back in June, I went to Columbus, Ohio to a punk rock music festival with my buddy who has an RV. We drove out there and he said, listen, there's no shitting in the RV. It's for pissing only which I can respect. I get it So all they had were we were in the RV lot and at this punk rock festival were portageons and I literally didn't shit for two and a half days
Starting point is 01:55:56 So when you say like what is your superpower around this a don't eat like an asshole But be just train your body to know when to shut it down. Like, my body knows when I'm home, it's shit-diam. And then as soon as I'm out at work, or at a music festival, we just shut it out down. I don't know, it's just mind over matter, I guess, is the, I'm being too literal with that answer. All right. Right, or just, again, if you know you're gonna go into long trip, like a plane flight, yeah, or just again, if you if you know you're going to go into long trip like a plane flight, yeah, that's 14 hours or something. Oh, do don't shit on the air plane. Yes, never ever shit on the airplane. You're an asshole if
Starting point is 01:56:34 you do that. Only if not for no other reason, then I'm drinking like an asshole and I have to piss. And you're just keeping the bathroom clogged up. You just get the end of that, get out. What are you doing? You're shitting on it. All right. That goes to the same with bosses too. Like that. Busses and airplanes. These are places where you just want to drink you on alcohol and piss. That's it. All right. There's another voicemail. A guy who's favorite part of the show is that this is funny. Hey Carl, you know what my favorite part of your show is? It's not the teaser, it's not OP radio, it's when you say that an ISO will stay on the soundboard and you never play it after the first time at the end.
Starting point is 01:57:20 You need more drops. I love that because that's someone who's paying very close attention. I do that all the time. I love this ISO right here. I'm going to keep it. We're going to play it over and over again. And then it's never ever played again. So something like this.
Starting point is 01:57:35 Your podcast stinks. Your pod. Yeah. Yeah. Stinks. I say that I'm going to play it from now on. And I never do ever again Your grubs should have a lifetime like 10 episodes at most and then you need to get a new one that per deprecate the old
Starting point is 01:57:55 Okay, moving on this is Dennis from Boston calling in W ATP thanks for picking up the phone, I guess. Long time, with Mayor First Time Collar, I'm a comic from Boston. I just listened to your Pat Oden's podcast. Right when I saw it go up, I was like, oh no. No one in Boston takes this shit well.
Starting point is 01:58:22 And I saw his responses on Twitter. Very agreeable. You got lucky. I want to boss to take this ship well. And I saw his responses on Twitter. Very agreeable. You got lucky. If you picked, say, the funny like a clown podcast hosted by Devin's worth, if you want another stuttering John, check that one out.
Starting point is 01:58:39 I know you got your hands on. Hey, get back to me. Goodbye. All right. I set that up as this is Dennis from Boston. In my notes, I have Dennis worth from Boston would be a new settering John if we did his show. So I don't know if that was Dennis trying to get us to do his show, which is very possible. Or if this guy just knows that guy sucks, has no such a humor and wants to start another war. But either way, I knows that guy socks, has no such a humor and wants to start another war. But either way, I like that he said that's Dennis. That's probably Dennis. I agree.
Starting point is 01:59:11 Because he was very goofy, sounded kind of clownish. Either way, I like that he said, instead of, uh, call me back, let's get back to me. He kind of changed the whole. All right. This is. So the only thing setter than do you want to be on my podcast is do you want me on your podcast? Yeah, desperately. Yes, this is true. And we we do get that a lot. But again, I appreciate people put themselves out there and say review my podcast because it shows you have a good sense of humor. And you
Starting point is 01:59:42 could take a beating. So that's good. I have to play this one because I was playing this, I was playing these voice-mouse last night with my wife and we loved this one. We were both cracking out. It was my favorite. Carl, hey man, you know the reason I listen to WATB? Because I fucking hate myself, and I love you screaming in my ear, just that reminds me of my fucked up childhood. As for psychiatric medications, I'm on every SSRI, every scientist I've ever made. My brain is smooth like a balloon.
Starting point is 02:00:17 Call me back, baby. I've never heard that term before. My brain is smooth like a balloon, and I love it. I've never heard a term before. My brain is smooth like a balloon and I love it. I've never heard a brain described like that before, but it sounds bad. It sounds like a negative thing that would happen to you from drugs. Sounds happy. And he does sound happy. He's a happy, good lucky guy. He's on every SSRI. It's ever been invented. This is a person who loves their old theme song but does that's the room.
Starting point is 02:01:05 I just want to say, can you upload title? You can't, I'm getting kind of bored to soon my community work up. I want more content, more, more Carl, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more Come on Yeah, you want more kaya always leave them wanting more Carl's true don't give them anything. I know it's where that guy goes I want more kaya more dog more opi. He put you three in the same category. Whoops.
Starting point is 02:01:48 Oh, yeah, shit. Whoops. So we did this podcast called the Tinfoil Hat podcast with Sam Tripoli a couple of of you. I loved it. I loved it. I love this show. And they talk about lizard people.
Starting point is 02:02:04 And this person makes an interesting observation Hey, Carl. I was just listening and I heard Kevin talking about how lizard people pronounce things They don't actually pronounce their ass as weird. They can't pronounce their elves So they'll say things like exactly All right, I just should be careful about that. You know what I haven't talked about. I haven't played any clips from our friend,
Starting point is 02:02:32 she must be killing an AKA Todd. AKA Patrick Michael. I've been told that the guy's unstable and we probably shouldn't make one of them anymore. But I believe you love to suvoys mail. And Kai, I'll let you be the judge of who you think this is. I'm pretty sure that's shameless. So, Shameless buddy, you're on the show again.
Starting point is 02:03:02 Nice job. You did it. Poor guy. You know, James buddy, you're on the show again. Nice job, you did it. Hmm. Ha ha ha ha. Poor guy. Okay. I'm serious, that guy's, I don't know. He's gonna do something to someone, drawing his kids in a bathtub. Yeah, and honestly, when I am brought into court
Starting point is 02:03:18 for that, my defense is, I don't even know if he knows who I am. I had nothing to do with this year, I had her. Did he leave you a voice mail? I don't even know if he knows who I am. I had nothing to do with this year otter Did he leave you a voicemail that could have been anyone screaming new metal lyrics into my voicemail? I don't know I want nothing to do with that All right, so this is exciting. There's this guy named I believe it's rice from a Reese from Australia and he is a huge official podcast fan and he called into the show
Starting point is 02:03:51 G'day, Kyle Tracy from Australia. Just wanted to say I love the show. I've been listening for a while I used to listen to the official podcast for about two years And then I finally branched out and he extended my horizons and listened to you guys, I've seen roses and I've got to say I love the show, quite a lot and I definitely definitely my favourite host you've had on. I love you and Jen from the Jingle's apartment, you go to Cute and yeah keep up the go. I just wanted to beg my friends, he's got to be such a dad up so here we go. Oh, Keeeg, stop that is Loch Ness Monster Keeeg. Oh yeah, I'm autistic. Bye. So that's Reese's Autistic and I was emailing with him back and forth.
Starting point is 02:04:36 It's his 25th birthday coming up or maybe it just happened and he's very excited to be on the show when Kaya is on the show because he's a huge official podcast fan. Well, that was a very sweet voicemail. It was. Very positive. So, sickeningly sweet. Leave Carl a 5 star review.
Starting point is 02:04:57 Yeah, please. Although we probably had, I just never look at the Australian reviews, so that's probably my problem. He calls back again again and I think he might have the wrong number this time. He's probably calling every podcast he does. I don't think I've ever talked about Melbourne, Australia, my life. Have I?
Starting point is 02:05:27 Melbourne. Really? I mean, I would pronounce it Melbourne. I'm sure I would, because that's how it's written. But I don't know that I've ever talked about that. So I think he's talking to someone else. I could be right. Oh, I'm so sick of this accent today.
Starting point is 02:05:42 I know it's podcast especially. You know, I'm too much. Learn accent today. I know it's podcasts especially. You know, I'm super. Learn English. All right, let's get- I managed. Let's get back to what we're both used to, Kaya. And that is Preview Besson Children who enjoy our shows.
Starting point is 02:05:58 Hey, Carl, it's Vic. Your favorite little boy. I walked in on my coworker the other week listening to why won't you date me. If you can't remember since you're so fucking old in Spenile, it's that podcast to the two cows suckling each other's teeth and wondering why they're fat. It's unbelievable that I work with someone so fucking retarded. If you're wondering, don't say that. Don't say the awkward. Two fat bitches just talking. It's like married women who you know been with their husband or whatever for like fucking
Starting point is 02:06:49 Not really going anywhere like So what's your fuck was that I don't know a robot a robot like so stuck a finger up a rest towards the end there. Yeah. I think I got to go. All right. So you agree that that is a female who's calling it. Oh, yeah. I mean, that's what I get to assume because pre-pubescent boys don't have co-workers. That does make sense, but WTP doesn't have a few male listeners, so I'm very confused on what's going on, I'm not sure what's out. Okay, so what is the, that's a nice little tangent here.
Starting point is 02:07:36 What's the person to judge your female viewers? Because for us on the official podcast is, I think it's like three or four percent. Yeah. Turns out if you talk about Dixon farting all day, women are really, they aren't, they aren't interested in that. I can only judge it by, I haven't looked at any of the dead. I can only judge it by the people who reach out to the show. And I get obviously tweets and emails and people on the Reddit and things.
Starting point is 02:08:04 I would say I can count on one hand, how many females have called in or emailed me. And every time I always write them back, like, holy shit, is your name really Mary? Is this true? Or like a creep? Yeah, I'm always like a press, but I'm not even being creepy, I'm just a press.
Starting point is 02:08:23 Like, do you like the show really? It's bizarre are you sure? You have boobies? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha It's less than 5% I would imagine. Which is weird. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. It's probably because every single podcast that women would like, you shit on. That's true. That is very true. Yeah, but I missed, I missed a chick's name, but look with your coworker when he leaves his desk, open up a Spotify or his browser and get the WATP episode
Starting point is 02:09:07 of why won't you date us and just leave it open. Don't tell him. Just see what happens. Yeah, someone on the discord was saying, man, somebody just reached out to me and said, I should listen to my brother, my brother and me, and I don't know what to say. I was like, just sending the link to WOTP Reviewing. That's always the answer. When somebody suggests a podcast is such, just go, oh really, okay, that sounds neat. Did you hear this?
Starting point is 02:09:32 Just send it over to him. This is Alex Jones. Oh, go ahead. Sorry. Quick insight story. So you did the cold ones. Yeah. And on the official podcast, we're in talks with some pretty famous people
Starting point is 02:09:47 Whether or not they want to get on the show. We're in talks with their managers to set some dates and this would have been next month or the month after and so we're discussing it You know me and Jackson we would have to fly in from Germany and Australia respectively and so they tell us You know one of the people where we might film with or be in the studio with the are the cold ones and all I could think is I'm not flying for that. How is that show so be now our flight? How is that show so popular? It's un-listenable, it's so terrible. These guys have nothing to say, they're not interesting in any single way.
Starting point is 02:10:28 They just sound like idiots. So the deal was in this single week we're gonna be recording with two very famous people, actual stars, not fucking YouTubers. It may be the cold ones who will drop by as well. So those famous people haven't confirmed yet So I went well, I'm not buying a ticket just for the promise of the cold ones right happening. I don't get we could escape. It's good enough So that's a funny little thing. I just remembered that's the difference between me and you is because you're saying
Starting point is 02:11:02 We our show has a ton of listeners and viewers. We don't need the cold ones. Those guys suck. Whereas I would say I will fly to Australia tomorrow to be on the cold ones because that video will be seen by two million people on YouTube within the first week. So I don't even care. I'm in. If the couple's with me, I'll go.
Starting point is 02:11:25 Yeah, I don't, I don't want to sound like a jerk, it's not because I think we're bigger than them or anything. I mean, they're huge. They're huge. They're much bigger than us. Yeah, they're big. They're big, yeah. They're big, yeah. They'll be able to.
Starting point is 02:11:36 It just me personally, I'm not interested in, I only want to talk to people that I like. On a personal level, I don't give a shit how many viewers they have. I have a fear of flying too. I'm not gonna sit in a fucking play for 16. I was being unable to shit. Use the bathroom just so I can meet a bunch of Fortnite streamers that just not gonna happen. That's a very healthy way to live and actually, now I think about it. You can get on a show with a ton of listeners. It doesn't mean that they're gonna give a shit about you or your show. When I go on Anthony or the Chip-Chippers in podcast, it's because I know that I talk about things that their listeners will be interested in.
Starting point is 02:12:13 If I were to go on the cold ones, I would have, I don't know, six new listeners out of the millions of people who listen to that show. They wouldn't make a fucking dead to anything. It wouldn't matter. It's a good point. Right. They don't stick around is that's the other thing that people don't understand about having famous guests on is which we do on the official podcast is every week you would have on some famous
Starting point is 02:12:36 YouTuber. But what happens is their fans tune in. And then that's it. They only tune in for that guest episode because it's their favorite YouTuber. Oh, Like if you're a big billber fan, you're gonna tune into Joe Rogan's latest episode But that doesn't mean you're gonna check out all the other Joe Rogan episodes. Maybe you don't give a shit about that bald motherfucker No, as soon as you're talking to bill burr. It's you're talking to Eddie Bravo about the flat earth You're like, all right. Well, I don't need to hear that. I just want to later build Burran. Right. Although me personally, I would totally tune into that. Oh, it's amazing.
Starting point is 02:13:11 Just only a recommendation. I tune into the tinfoil hat one. It's great. Watch the Alex Jones episode. Great fucking episode. It's so great. I love those guys. And I was telling my wife last night she was getting upset with me because someone suggested Owen Benjamin You know Owen Benjamin is Yeah, kinder so his whole thing now
Starting point is 02:13:32 I didn't want her twice. His thing is that the moon doesn't exist and He goes on these long. Yes, I know because on these long explanations are why the moon doesn't he just he's pretty much a poison Like I said to her say so try to explain to her like he brought us to see points and then she's like you want to you a fucking idiot I'm just saying is it interesting point I don't know just so not there just so it's interesting to be honest I don't think I'll embed your videos all the answers she's like who is this guy like astrophysicist I'm like no he's a comedian who plays piano all right the why are you listening to him I don't know I don't know so what's suggested it I'm just, no, he's a comedian who plays piano. Oh, the why are you listening to him? I don't know! I don't know! Someone suggested it.
Starting point is 02:14:07 I'm just checking it out. This is a weird world we live in. This is Alex Jones calling in to the show. Hey, Carl. This is Alex Jones, this is Alex Talk. Hey, I was listening to your show. Sam, there's an Illuminati influence and I heard a guy call it in, Dan Alaswig.
Starting point is 02:14:28 He said that geoengineering is the new term. Alas, this is him. That's a globalist. Won't you use? Because we found out about the chemtrails. And I said, oh no, that's the biggest chemtrails. Don't pay attention to the chemtrails. And we'll find out about the chemtrails.
Starting point is 02:14:41 I have the documents that see I and the FBI and the USA been working together to get the Cairns girls and now they say oh to you under nearly Suntip. Anyway, you're doing some good work, you know, I listen to you and feel since pride. Being an American, so home with that. Not a bad impression. Yeah. I mean, crows talking as his normal self sounds more like Alex Jones, but whatever.
Starting point is 02:15:11 All right. Last voice man, I have to play. It's more the content of Alex Jones impressions. The thing is, he is the only one who can really gain momentum like Alex Jones. Everyone can do an Alex Jones voice, but it's another thing to ramble on for literal uninterrupted 10 minutes with a single second of a pause of like Alex Jones. That's his skill. That's why he's so fun to listen to. He doesn't falter ever. Right. Never stutters. You're right. He never falters. He's always out into the next thing because he probably hasn't his mind. When he tracks, he can go on at any given time. And he just follows one of them. And it just continues to splinter off, splinter off, splinter off so that he can just be talking about crazy
Starting point is 02:15:51 nonsense for 60 minutes without interruption, no problem. No, I was just gonna say it's like sometimes he doesn't even breathe. Right. Feels like almost, this is, that's talent. He can improvise like a, like like Alex Jones. I says niche. I still love when Krojan, I did the Alex Jones podcast on WTP. And he and I both committed to it. We listened to the entire week's worth of episodes of Alex
Starting point is 02:16:17 Jones to really understand what this guy is all about. And the best part about Alex Jones is not him ranting about the Illuminati or the left or the Democrats or the globalists or all these different entities that are out to destroy you. It's when he talks about his products. When he goes on, this is where he gets really passionate. He'll go on for, he'll be like, I'm the globalist. They're going to take over the world. And by the way way if you want to use the best toothpaste you'll ever use It's for your family it'll change your future. It'll change your health You'll be the greatest human being to ever exist when you use this toothpaste like wait what the fuck just happened
Starting point is 02:16:53 I thought we were talking about real things and I'm trying to shield toothpaste to me. Is this that important? It's it's fucking toothpaste So great. It's like a two fluor-free toothpaste that will shield you from radiation, air filters, and bunker doors, and... Yo, your bunkers never complete without these fucking aluminum hinges and these platinum door locks, okay? This is very interesting, and he's found, and he's just a number one man. Nobody could fill those boots. This is the toothpaste.
Starting point is 02:17:26 The globalists don't watch you to know about. Is it? I don't know. I'm sure they'd allow it to be at Walmart. It's not that big a deal. Pat Tbg in Discord says, did you get my email about the Doug stand-hope ISO? I did. I didn't have time to get to it. It sounds like it'd be perfect for our show and I promise to check that out. All right, here's the last voice, my one, but... You know, Carl, just when I think your show is getting better and you're starting to learn from some of these other podcasts, you're going to take a piss on your podcast and you forget to bring the microphone with you. Yeah, I have not learned from OP. I'm supposed to bring the microphone with you. Yeah, I have not learned from OP.
Starting point is 02:18:06 I'm supposed to bring the microphone with me. Did I think a P break and leave that on the show last week? Did I say I was, I couldn't tell that was someone from the discord who heard me say I'm going to take a P or if I left it on the show as I couldn't remember. Either way, you left in you saying you were going to pee off the actual break itself. Yeah, look at me. You just announced it and then it cut. Yeah, I'm being one of those guys now It's that's another thing where I say oh, I'm gonna take that out and pose I need to stop oh
Starting point is 02:18:37 I'm gonna take a break. I don't you don't need that in. It's not entertaining for anyone Right and then you actually take out things that you could have left in that are cute like your cat. Yeah, the fuck that. My stupid cat wants to go on the show so badly. She never will. She never will. Oh, that's great. Kaya, I've had a blast talking with you today. Thank you so much for doing this. I'm just calling to say that this week's episode of Opie Radio was by far the best episode of Opie Radio ever and I challenge you to dispute that. you

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