Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep177 - Ryan
Episode Date: October 27, 2019This week we review a show that's not very popular but is exactly as popular as it should be. Meet Ryan, a good Christian boy who's just trying to figure out how to balance a life of not getting laid ...and gator walks. Ryan explains what to look for in a girl and I'm pretty sure I saw Cros scribbling some notes. We also discuss Canadian state-sponsored comedy, Sheamus's oral sex preference, Opie on the Carl Ruiz tribute tour, 2 Live Crew, and new Mastodon vs. old Mastodon. Get bonus episodes by becoming a patron: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
But rain man, come on.
Couss.
Couseru.
Couseru.
Uh, Carl has, uh, one of my favorite podcasts ever.
Who are these podcasts?
It's called Run By.
A guy called Carl.
Who are these podcasts?
And it's a podcast review.
I was on Who Are These Podcasts yesterday.
It's a great show.
Have you ever listened to it?
I have not.
It's a quality show and they have good ideas.
It's kind of like,
October, but with really no redeeming quality,
what's up?
You guys are concise and brutal.
You just mercilessly ripson people.
Some of this quite hilarious.
You don't have to listen to shitty podcasts.
You do it for us
You do it. Who's guys are making some fucking points here? I like what I was saying. I don't know what you like what they're saying
It's hilarious. The show is hilarious
It's show time
The End All the adoring fans welcome WNTP
W-A-T!
Hello back slappers and cousin ruse, welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts.
The only show that is BFFs with the producer of OP Radio.
I'm your host, Karol, with me as always it's Krood. Go to who are these.com to get our email address,
voicemail number, link to our sub or at link to the Discord server,
link to our Patreon, link to our merchandise.
We encourage our listeners to give us a five-story review on iTunes
and then shit all over us in the comments section.
I want to thank our friend Coleman, who continues to keep
all of our international reviews updated out of document. So I have hundreds and hundreds of reviews that I will someday read and cry out loud.
Out of podcast.
Today we'll be reviewing a show called Ryan, I guess.
That was the only name that was on the page.
This is a suggestion from PJ Fillham.
Frozen and I have both listened to the show separately.
We have barely discussed it with each other beforehand. Let's get into it. Philium, Froze and I have both listened to the show separately.
We have barely discussed it with each other beforehand.
Let's get into it.
This is one of those podcasts where a guy just talks into, I don't want to use the word
microphone.
Yeah, we're talking to something.
And then he puts it out as a show.
And Ryan is an interesting character to say the least.
I feel like we need to just get right into clips.
Yeah.
Hard to describe.
Do you have one that sums up the show for you?
I mean, I guess here's number three.
I'm saying hello.
What is up you guys?
Good evening, night.
Oh, my gosh.
So welcome to the my podcast.
And I'm just kicking back. And I just signed up for another year of QGIT2.
So why did you JIT2 talk out this show?
He does one of my favorite things that you point out, which is he starts off strong and then immediately loses confidence.
We're like, hey everybody!
And it just, yeah, it goes nowhere.
Now see, I assume this was your Halloween episode and that you would broken into the abandoned in Sanus Island
That's how and that you found this USB stick and this was like the only trace left from this horrifying serial killer ghost
It's possible that was the assumption I was going with but you said you found it on the web or whatever
So I don't know how this podcast was even found PJ sent me a link
He was looking for Shamist and found this guy
Which makes a little bit of sense. I can see where they'd be categorized. Shamist is spiritual cousin
They'd be categorized in the same place for sure
He talks a lot about what types of girls he likes. Yeah, what types of guys girls should like that's on his mind quite a bit
Tell us my quite a bit
So this is his assessment of the type of girl that's right for him.
I've dated certain girls, but I just like it for who they are. Not like what clothes they wear or something, stuff like that. We're all different in a way.
And I'm just saying,
you know, there's a lot of different girls out there,
but I mostly go for personality-wise.
Well, that's retarded.
Okay, so according to this guy,
who's, by the way, never had a girlfriend,
I've never gotten laid.
Yeah, his thing with girls, he likes people
who have a personality that matches up well with his. He's not worried about how much money they make, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, certain girls that are like suicide girls just not like what you're thinking
of is like you know the suicide look is kind of like emo girls the girls with
the tattoos that is what I'm thinking of yeah what do you mean not when I'm
thinking of like you know the suicide girl models that have like have I know
that art yeah I know that tattoos and dyed hair and that screen red purple whatever anyway. That's the opposite of liking a girl for her personality
Can I just point that out? Do I need to point that out? That's the exact opposite of that. Yeah, I'm like tanning up girls with daddy issues
Okay, well, hey, I'm not sure the personality is gonna be all that dynamite
You know and be
That seems to be a premise that looks more so
than who the people are.
Crows, you look like you're dying to say so.
What do you got, buddy?
Yeah, well, so we get a lot of talk about this.
There's a lot of talk about his taste in women.
And he has very deep, very sophisticated taste in women,
especially for someone who I'm guessing has a religious background
has never been closer intimate with anyone, maybe the and the in the choirboard closet. I don't
know. There may be a tiny little bit of overlap here but number five, let's
talk about Ryan's kind of gal. This seems like a good topic. So my kind of
girl is a girl with a good personality and a good heart and a little bit of Christian but just that's
well balanced that has a good mindset as much as I do.
Has a good mindset as much as I do. Now that's an important thing to take care of
and like you said he does get a little he gets a little superficial but I
think that's okay because Carl and you know this about me I'm fascinated with
the things that bring us together.
You know what I mean?
We talk about it all the time.
Gay and straight, men and women, white and black.
There's one thing we can all agree on.
And that's Big Titty Goth Girls, here's number six.
I love any kind of girl, but I'm starting to like, you know,
certain girls that are like suicide girls.
Just not like what you're thinking
I was like
the suicide like is kind of like
you know girls
and I think we can all get behind that dead milkman making their debut at W.A.T.P.
What a fucking boomer reference
What a pull. Oh, we're only going downhill from there Carl. I promise you now number seven
He talks a little bit, you know, we're edgy. We need some edgy girls
Cuz this guy so fucking edgy
Well, you know is someone who's nice someone who's nice, who's caring, who's loving, who's friendly, who's a bit of a Christian,
but also has, you know,
also has kind of like a little bit of edginess.
Like if you have a edgy look,
rather you have tattoos,
or you dye your hair red,
or purple, or blue, or whatever.
Danger, will Robinson. Danger, or blue, or whatever.
Danger will Robinson.
Danger, no will Robinson.
Danger.
I'm going back to 66 cops by the way.
So, and I know it sounds like a great idea, Ryan,
like that chick that's covered in tattoos
and has aggressive facial piercings and bright blue hair
that's bagging for everyone to pay attention all the time.
I know it sounds like a great idea for a partner, but it's kind of not.
And you know, he also purposely needs to be a little bit Christian.
He mentioned that a few different times.
These are chicks who probably aren't all that Christian.
I'm just going to throw it out.
Yeah, you know, their parents probably were.
And then, you know, Carl, he gets a little, he gets a little blue for my taste, to be
honest.
With you, number eight, he gets a little...
Arrater for my taste to be honest with you number eight he gets a little R-rated for my you know when you like your grab a woman's breast and it's and you you feel it and
it feels like bag of sand when you're touching it was that in the show I don't ever hear that
that's when the 40-year-old virgin that was the closest I could get to his person
That's when the 40-year-old virgin That was the closest I could get to his person
It's not like that!
Oh, you want the fuck out of me?
I was thinking what's closer to this guy when I found that clip I'm like that's the same
That is the same dude
Steve Correll traveled into the future, I heard this, did the research, traveled back
Alright, you say into the future, I don't know when this podcast came out
And I should point out that
This guy put out
three episodes. Two of them are less than five minutes. The one that Krojan and I are talking about
was about an hour long but it was strung together with probably 10 different episodes or so.
Yeah a lot of hello and goodbye. A lot of art I got to go and then he's back up and then all
of a sudden he's got a guest on or something. It was very odd the way this whole thing came together
and you played a clip earlier where there were some noises going on. Yeah a lot of that. and he's got a guest on or something. It was very odd the way this whole thing came together.
And you played a clip earlier
where there were some noises going on.
Yeah, a lot of that.
Yeah, I wanted to play a quick example of that.
I'm gonna sit here about some stuff.
Vee, vee.
Say, everyone's in.
Sorry for the beeping.
Everyone's just sending me notifications on Facebook.
All right, so I want to point something out about that.
What you just heard was his phone vibrated
and his browser pinged at him,
which means there was a single notification from Facebook
that's attached to both his phone and his browser
and he says, everyone's messaging me.
I just, these fucking friends of I, they won't stop
was trying to get me to hang out with them.
It's too much, I'm overwhelmed by all this friendship.
And he gets message rarely enough that he didn't think to turn either of the
devices to silent when he started recording.
See what the fuck was that noise? Oh, that's right.
And so like, it sounds like he's got some ear buds on and he's laying in bed, right?
I mean, there's lots of blanket moving and all kinds of, it's the stereo experience.
What's the ASMR kind of stuff going on?
Yeah. It's a little creepy.
But I did appreciate
that early out in the episode, he lets us know
what's going on with his mental state.
Right now I'm actually doing pretty well right now.
Nope.
Nope.
Dude, this guy is not doing well.
Yeah.
He talks about the fact that he gets rejected a lot,
which this I believe to be true.
You know, I don't like a lot of rejections.
And I know what it feels like to be that way
in a rejection kind of spot where...
What you're talking about is English's first language
in a rejection kind of spot.
He knows what it's like to be in a rejection kind of spot.
The fuck does that mean?
What's he talking about? Good question. Yeah, there's a lot of English man. Here's another example of him not understanding what words mean
We all believe in that crazy stereotype of you know, oh she's out of your league. Oh what you want to date that person she's you know
And
So wait people being too good for you is a stereotype?
That's not what a stereotype is.
And by the way, there's a lot of girls who are too good for you, Ryan.
I want to believe that, too. It's true.
You know, girls who have, like, other jobs or a family or any other option.
Can speak in complete sentences.
Yeah, there's a lot of traits.
Aren't currently living in a trailer park with she was making it
That's a girl who might be interested in this guy, but I'm not it's gonna be tough
Well dating is tough Carl as you know, but Ryan is here and he's got some dating advice for us. Oh good
My numbers nine and ten are some really sage wisdom great and even if you tell them that you don't want to hook up with anybody, or you're not really
like looking for someone, they try to hook you up with people by the, I won't say my
fours, but they always want to play that matchmaker.
So you know, trust your own instincts, get to know the the person get to know the good person
Get to know
Yeah, just get to know the girl or guy yourself on a personal level if you're gonna date someone
Yeah, you should get to know that that's weird. I think I disagree with that
Well, there might be there's a there's a colonel to I feel like if you read the entire
Well, there might be there's a there's a kernel of truth. I feel like if you read the entire
excerpt on Craigslist that she provided for you, I know enough. That's good enough. Here's number 10.
Shouldn't be your friends hooking you up with someone that you don't like. Shouldn't be someone that
what is whatever the reason is.
So
and again not to repeat, but if your friends are gonna hook you up with someone that
you don't like, that might not be the best person to date.
And again, that's pretty good advice, Carl.
This guy, I will say, he told me a lot of things that I didn't already know, and it's really
good advice.
For example, people are always
actually like, they're out for your best interest. Crush. Oh yeah. But that might
not be the case. Of course. I think this is total like insanity. But people always,
you know, easily person I bump into, they're always saying like, oh, I'm just looking
for what's your best interest. How do you know what my best interest is? How do you
know what anybody's best interest is? You know, they always, I'm sure some of you guys bumped into
a person, oh I'm just looking out for you man, what's your best interest? No, you're not looking for
my best interest. You know, not a lot of people are looking for your own interest. Maybe I'm talking
about. This guy talking about, I'm sure you bump into a lot of people who say they're looking
out for your best interest. Never once. Never once in my life. And I'm a fucking boomer.
And that's never happened to me. Yeah, he's in some weird cult stuff. There's something
weird going on. So here's another example of him giving advice that you just don't get
from other places. You know, everybody's different. Don't worry about certain things that don't need to be worried about.
You know, I never thought of that. This guy should worry to fucking book. It should be called stop
worried about something. Don't need to be worried about. I'm coming around on this. You do.
The philosophy, the towel, the zen of Ryan is, yeah, I'm into around on this you do the philosophy the towel the zen of Ryan is yeah
I'm into it. This guy has the most generic platitudes
I'm the face of the earth. He gets into one part of the show where he gets off what he calls a rant
Yeah, I'm sorry guys. I got a rant for a minute and here's his his big rant
Here's my thing is I think in my head like dude put yourself in their shoes
put yourself and they're pretty commit. God fucking amazing advice buddy. Yeah. I've never heard
that before really. You should maybe try to empathize with somebody and understand where they're
coming from before you judge them. I wonder. Don fuck yourself, asshole. Maybe you should walk a certain distance in their shoes, like six meters or something.
This-
This is great right here, because-
Because he takes a planet, too, that we've all heard a million times,
and then fumbles the fuck out of it.
He has no idea what he's actually talking about.
Number three, push yourself on their shoes.
I don't believe where they lived and their shoes.
And this goes for everything.
Try to live where they lived and their shoes.
After this goes for everything.
After you put yourself on their shoes.
Yeah, that's a two-in-one clip.
What the fuck is wrong with this guy?
I don't think he understands what he's saying.
No.
And then he has the balls to tell me this.
They literally think before you say something. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha maybe as it Ryan's strong suit. He knows what kind of girl he wants to be with. Yeah.
The kind with that's tatted up, it has daddy issues.
Yeah.
We doesn't know who the fuck he is or what he's talking about,
obviously.
Well, this is a little bit of a longer one, but.
I took a few things and smashed them together.
So he's really interested in like multiculturalism.
And I feel like it's hearts in the right place.
Like I really do, like I think somewhere inside
He's like he has a good notion, but he sounds like a fucking moron
So I thought the low straights that I could sir town last night. I'm like guys. You got to help me with this this clip
I'm putting it in I don't have it. So they came over we had a whole it was great, man
But number 19 is the multicultural mega mix
And I feel bad for all these other religions because they're going in war.
Even the Indian, Indian people get less staking for Taliban people.
I mean, I don't know Mexico or wherever.
There's war, there's cartels, there's whatever it is.
That's negative.
Certain muslim girls that are Lebanese or Lebanon.
Lebanese are Lebanon. I think they're very, very kind.
They're Lebanon. They're so cool up there you guys.
I feel horrible that you guys go through a lot of garbage and a lot of stuff.
I mean, certain girls, like certain Muslim girls, there are a lot of girls that are beautiful
and attractive ladies.
Oh my gosh, dude.
All these other cultural girls.
Like, for me, it hurts.
It's, I love to have one, dude.
Oh, they're so beautiful.
Oh, they're so beautiful.
So beautiful.
So beautiful.
So beautiful.
Oh, that's the last thing a Muslim girl is gonna hear.
As the pillow comes over her face, because this guy's like, it starts off like, he sounds
like an idiot, but it's innocent but by the end of it
He's like oh those girls with the dark skin. Oh, they're so fucking like like you're like whoa dude
Let's all just calm down here
You're like show talking about you gotta find the right person for you. It's about the person
Yeah, and then by the end of it. It's like he wants any fucking chick with a vagina
Yeah, but it's like but he's into like porno
Categories. He's like no no no. I want a Canadian girl that wears, but he's into like poor not categories. He's like, no, no, no, I want to be a Indian girl that wears a just ease off buddy
Just I'm glad you put back clip together. That was great
Some of those things I didn't clip over just so fucking funny
But this is the beginning of his hot political talk and the thing that he says on here talking about someone being dumb
It's unbelievable and
Everyone always says
Right over here, right? And I
over here, like, we'll go back to where you came from. And it's so
inappropriate to say to certain people, rather, your Muslim, Israel,
Pakistan,
because you guys know, you can't say go back to where you come from. I
don't care if this person's Muslim or Israel or Pakistan
What are you are you Mexican or you Canada?
Yeah, well as he says you know
Multicultural people they have to put up with a lot of garbage and a lot of stuff
And I think that's you can't put it
Anybody, he also saw a news clip once gross really that really bummed him out. I mean you don't know what they've been through
A lot of people don't know what they've been
Time to go
This was Israel or someone around there
And this was Israel or someone around there. This is like 5 or 6 and he's never seen a camera before.
And he's never seen a camera before, right?
So what does he do? He throws his hands up in the air.
Because he thinks it's a gun.
We don't know what's going on. So I will be right back
to you guys. What a story Mark. It's amazing. He talks about the fact that he saw this video
on the news ones and it's from a few years ago and it was maybe Israel or somewhere near
there. I'm not sure. But the important thing is, the important thing is a five year old can know what a camera was.
I think that could happen anywhere.
It's a five year old.
We're talking about a young child.
It's confused about a fucking device that's pointing at them.
That's not tragic to me.
That's kind of normal, I would think.
He dies one of the multiple times during this show, too.
Yeah, that really was on his mind.
It was.
So he has some guests on. Yes, he does. And boy,
I'd love to talk about some of the guests. If that's all right with you, he is all right with me.
Can I start off? Of course, please. This, because I don't have many clips on this, but he does have
this woman who comes on. Yes. And right off the bat, roasts him.
They don't know each other.
They're on some chat rule either or something.
I don't know what's going on.
And I respect this about him.
It's like a Larry King thing.
Like Larry King would famously never read the book
of the author he was gonna interview.
Like this guy doesn't even know.
He just hits, go on.
Does he know why he's talking to someone?
Yeah, he just, there's a button on a browser
that he hits and all of a sudden somebody comes up
and now they're making a podcast. So apparently he's talking to somebody. Yeah, he just, there's a button on the browser that he hits and all of a sudden somebody comes up and now they're making a podcast.
So apparently, he's talking to the queen of mean
on this first look, is she roasting good?
Your voice sounds like a female.
So are you a female?
Oh, no.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Vostan.
Nice.
All right, what do you got, Kroge?
Yeah, here was her introduction.
This was number 12, They're saying hello.
So, so where are you from, by the way?
I'm actually from California. Wow. Yeah. And I love the series California Cation.
So, so what's the plan for today? Just chilling?
Now, I had to leave that all in because the chemistry is fucking electrified.
Died of my-
Now, uh, number 13, I think we get to the bottom of her state of mind.
I'm not sure whether it's appropriate to ask or not. Do you do pot at times?
Oh, no. No, I don't mean to.
No? No.
I can't. No.
I was looking for it yesterday.
I couldn't find it, but I so needed to get high.
When you're using drugs, you're only cheating yourself out of the chance to find out who you really can be.
I'm glad you put in that at the end. I don't want people to think that we're promoting drug use.
Well, far being from that Carl, I think this is the best anti-drug message that could ever be put out. If you smoke
marijuana, you'll spend your time staring into a fucking webcam talking to this fucking
moron. I mean, what, what better commercial could you have for a drug-free life?
Crows is winning the production battle today. He's put way more production into his clips
that I've put into my-
That was my Sgt. Papper's by the way.
That's impressive.
And I had to get high as a fucking kite for me to get.
It makes sense that this is not an anomaly shit.
So after all this just fucking sizzling conversation,
number 14, they say goodbye.
Ryan, I'm sorry, but I have a class.
I gotta go.
I hope to catch you again.
Cause I'm a liar.
Yeah, I'm a liar. I hope to catch you again
Henry Rollins making a comeback at the show. I don't believe that she wanted to talk to Ryan again No, I don't believe that she had a class as she had to run to I think she was born out of her mind
That conversation was awful the only thing that was fun about it
I do have a clip here is when the whatever they were using Skype or Discord
when the audio was awesome. I don't do part but I'm the I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do.
I'm not the same time but that was in this show that we listen to that clip right there. Now call
me crazy. Yeah. Because I do I play black Sabbath records backwards and I write down the satanic messages that
come to me. That sounded like he said, I don't do pot. I get high on life when I
masturbate. I thought he said that too. Okay, I thought he said that too, but I'm
pretty sure that Jesus would frown upon that sort of thing. I mean, as George
Carlin said, if God didn't want you to whack it, he would have made your arm
shorter. You know what I mean?
Do you want to talk about a second guest sure all right, so this guy
This guy's fascinating here's number 15 just got back from the gym early like an hour ago
No, oh, yeah, bro. Yeah, bro. Yeah, bro. Keep on that fit work, bro
It's the job done, bro keeps keeps you motivated keeps you going you know what I'm saying
What I love about that is if someone says that they've just been to the gym work in the word bro
Six times into the next sentence and everything is fine. Yeah, they're on the same plane right here
And then on on number 16 is where they really come together. Hey, so what you want to talk about man
where they really come together. Hey, uh, so, uh, what you want to talk about, man?
Man, dude.
So, and we can talk about anything.
Anything.
Are you a gleeze, anything?
Oh, yeah, dude.
I love video games, man.
Cool.
Are you a gamer?
One, two, three.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, video games in me.
Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to shove about about video. Oh, that's the shit and I I didn't I I this was on the cutting before they he goes into something about like a
PlayStation 2 game he played as an 11 year old or something like some game
No, I've ever heard of from a million fucking years ago
What I don't have the clip either yeah, it goes. Are you a gamer? And he says yeah? Yeah, I love video games
There's anything about fortnight now fort Fortnite is the most popular video game ever.
It's played by everybody everywhere all the time.
And this guy goes, I don't know,
I don't know anything about that.
Yeah.
And then, okay, great.
You mean you talk about anything?
Good call.
And then the other bros, he starts talking about a game
that's coming out.
And the other guy doesn't miss years.
It's a whole fucking con. You would be like, if I I said what do you want to talk about you like sports? Yeah, I'm a big sports family
You ever watch football? What's football? I don't know. Yeah, I don't know
Baseball the world series that have it right now is that the pointy ball or the round ball?
What's one is that you seem like you know too much? Yeah, the only good thing about video games was number 17
Like some of the games?
Oh my gosh, dude, some games just piss you off so much.
Like to the point that you want to be fucking a terrorist
and blow up some shit.
What?
Oh.
All right, oh easy, easy.
This guy's flying the ISIS flag over there.
Holy shit.
Ready to fucking take down a building.
And that just for giggles, here's number 18. Here's him saying goodbye. Holy shit. Right, you to fucking take down a building. And that just for
giggles, here's number 18, here's him saying goodbye. All right. I just learned this from
a video game on how to do the other. All right, man, we got to wrap this up. I got about
20 seconds. So I go by the outbreak. You can look me up on YouTube. You can review this
post. You can look at my thing. anyways man I gotta go the podcast you just
heard was published with anchor now I left all that in so bro guy cut some
off mid sentence gives his spiel he actually spells out as you to name I cut
that out and then he gets cut off mid sentence and then it's like hey you
can podcast too with this, whatever the fuck feature.
Like this is the problem,
and you talk about this all the time.
Yeah.
Anyone can make a podcast,
and this is what you get,
and this is what you get,
this is what you fuck again, man.
You know that anchor is the technology
that Shameless is always talking about.
Yeah, and therein lies the problem.
Therein lies the problem.
I think I have more of a problem with anchor than I do with any of these podcasters
because they're encouraging this type of behavior.
Like, hey, you have no listeners, doesn't matter.
Do a podcast with us.
Nobody gives a shit, no one's listening to it.
So what? Keep doing it.
No! Stop it.
You're putting shit on the internet.
We're gonna have to shut down the internet at some point.
So I was gonna come in and say, you know what?
This isn't working out.
No more internet for anyone.
Sorry guys, there's a few people who are doing it wrong. So we got to shut it all down
There is no reason for any of this audio to exist no or to be preserved the fact is it takes
We're burning computing cycles. We're using carbon
We're all sorts of natural resources are being used up to keep fucking Ryan on the internet.
We're burning our environment as we speak
so that Ryan has a platform to talk to fucking strangers
about bullshit.
So at some point they talk about how Ryan can't get a girlfriend.
Yeah.
But Ryan's got a great outlook on this.
And he figures out how to keep himself
Happy even though he's not satisfied in that department. The best way I'd say it as a joke
It's like hey if no one if no girl likes me that's fine with me. I'll just grow up to be a million a
Alrighty Alrighty. Good advice. If no girl likes him, that's fine with him.
I got an idea, Ryan.
If no girl likes you, change your personality because it sucks.
That's the universe trying to tell you something.
Or God or whatever you think that is.
Nobody wants to date me.
Stop being a fucking loser on the internet, then.
And let me tell you what a fucking idiot this guy ends he talks about food at the end tough love with Dr. Carl this is where I
don't get I don't want a patience anymore people sound coming to me all right
all right that was mean you're the yaddies are talking about all this food that he had, because that's always exciting.
I had a fucking Philly cheese stick, you wouldn't believe it.
I can believe it.
He says this.
Yesterday I tried the boss burger at Chili's.
That was delicious too.
He says I tried the boss burger at Chili's.
It was delicious.
And then, not three minutes later, he goes on to say this.
And, uh, and you guys, like like I said I am such a foodie
Yeah, no you are not Ryan you can't say that the bus burger is delicious and the year of food
Those days you don't exist in the same universe you fucking retard. I cobbled out there was him
He was talking about how he ate rent. He like, sliders drenched in ranch, dressingers on the cross.
And it was like,
but I only have a short time,
like I only have seven minutes to talk,
so I have to keep it real concise.
So here's what I have to tell you,
a sandwich I had yesterday.
Yeah, you know what, that reminds me,
I gotta pull it up when PJ set in this podcast.
Who is PJ?
Fuck this PJ guy, PJ. I'm looking out for you, dude. do you can't say that man this guy's killing it for us
I have another sign that he recorded that I just play a way to I love you PJs the bus he says you got to check out Ryan
He speaks nonsense about getting a good girl and what makes a girl good to him check tons of background noise
There's two guests that come on.
Guess one is an annoying con that walks over Ryan.
The next is some douche that also walks over Ryan.
It doesn't give a shit about what Ryan has to say.
I also noticed that the guests end the podcast
that I'm just as abruptly as Ryan himself.
He randomly cuts off his own podcast mid thought
for what I'm assuming
were storage limitations. I would ever device he was using. Since he meshes them together
becomes really noticeable. And this is the thing that I was talking about. I don't know why
he has to go. He comes and I say, hey, welcome everybody. And then five minutes later,
I got to go. Why did you choose to podcast right now? Is it a storage limitation of a device?
I guess it's a good theory. Is that he? Yeah. Right? Why did you choose to podcast right now? Is it a storage limitation of a device?
I guess it's as good a theory as any.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's coming in cold, he's got nothing to say,
he just hits record and starts filling up the time.
At one point, he comes out, I don't have the clip,
but at one point he comes out and he says,
hey guys, it's a late night tonight,
thanks for hanging with me, you night owls.
No, you're recording it,
it doesn't matter when you recorded this. I wasn't in the Saturday morning asshole. Yeah. I'm not up late with you, you night owls. No, you're recording it. It doesn't matter when you recorded this.
I wasn't in the Saturday morning asshole.
Yeah, I'm not up late with you.
You fucking retard.
There's not a whole lot of this that made a whole lot of sense.
I was only partially kidding about the insane asylum,
USP stick by the way.
You and I both have the exact same number one clip.
It's both called tongue tide.
And I keep on wanting to do a lot of cop.
Yeah, I'm tongue tide right now.
Maybe it's because you're fucking messaging people on Reddit
while you're trying to do a podcast.
I hear you typing over there.
Maybe that's why you can't talk real well.
Stop typing and do your fucking podcast if that's what you're doing.
Yeah, I don't even know why I'm upset.
The Skype put this shit online.
No one was able to find it yeah somebody found it so it's
it's not like he's out there promoting it I take it all back right it's fine
it's actually very fun yeah good luck buddy we're I feel bad for people that are
like kind of contacting me and trying to do a podcast I do too yeah I feel very
bad for people who are trying to do a podcast with you Ryan. I'm not sure what's wrong with them what happened in their lives
but it's tragic. Yeah. Here's another real quick clip that I just want to make a point on. It happens. Do you get stuck on a friend's own?
I think this guy's entire life is stuck in a friend's own. Yeah. If I had a guess there's some chicken church that he's been staring at
Creepily for three years and he is stuck in that friend zone even Jesus loves him as a friend
All right, here's my new motto and I think that I need to like post this in our studio
Something that I want to look at every day and especially before we start recording a new podcast.
Just remember that God always said that you should never judge.
Never judge anybody.
God always said that you should never judge.
All the time.
Is that true?
Did God always say that you should never judge anybody?
Doesn't God do nothing but judge people?
Is it the whole point of that entity?
It's just a judge people and everything they've done in every action they made. Yeah, that'll add of an even thing
I mean, I'm not a scholar. I'm not if Metallica lyrics have taught me anything
It's that judge not last yee for whom the bell toll
That's exactly what he's on your right sure. I'm pretty sure I think you're right about that most of my scripture
I get from Metallica lyrics.
I also like that this guy has five minutes
in a time to podcast, but can't blow
as fucking nose before he is.
I'm not up in.
I wanted to rant about, and talk about just.
Ugh.
Oh my God.
The fuck is wrong with this guy.
All right, let's get on to his ranting.
And this is a clip where I don't think he understands
how rants work.
I know this is like my rant first night, guys.
This is episode three and this is just a rant
of what I'm thinking about and what's going on in my mind
and I'm just thinking of what the heck, man.
Good great rant asshole. Listen, I'm fired fired up today I have a lot to fucking say.
What the heck man? Alright join us again tomorrow we'll be back.
Yeah and then he goes on to admit this. I really don't understand.
You know a lot of things and...
Oh really you don't understand a lot of things and... Don't shits your eye!
Oh really, you don't understand a lot of things?
I noticed!
I noticed when you said I don't care if you're an Israel or a packy sandwich.
That's what I knew you didn't understand a lot of things.
Fucking idiot.
This clip right here, I did not edit it in any way.
This is how the show is put together.
And I'll be right it in any way. This is how the show is put together
I'll be right back you guys
Welcome back you guys so I tell you what buddy hit pause never say you're leaving or coming back I will just not know that it happened you could make that seamless pretty easily
I do like that this guy works out a lot
because I like what he does for his workout.
I did three sets of frog jumps
and then when I got down with that,
I did the first set of a hundred
and then I took a break for a while.
Fascinating.
And then I did, and then I finished off
the other set of hundreds.
So I did 200. I finished off the other set of hundreds. Oh, so I did 200
200
That's fascinating. Please go
So he does hundreds of frog jumps he goes out later to talk about the fact that he was doing
Bear crawls and gator walks and listen crows. I'm not a gym. You might know that about me
I know the fuck this guy is talking about
These are all made up things, right and even if you did would you care?
I mean, I wanted to hum it to gain her walks. This guy could really do. Oh, yeah, seems impressive
I am keeping notes over here. Okay. What else do you got on this guy? Nothing mean either good
What a fun show though. This heart could back to good times. I was listening to the show this morning and
I had this thing where I pulled I don't know 90% of the clips within the first 10 minutes because everything he says is fucking ridiculous
It's all just nonsense and I realized I can just clip every part
So I got to be a little more choosy. I had I had that probably I had 50 times naps right and I'm like fuck because I'm not you know
I'm not gonna talk know what I mean?
I'm not gonna talk about all this shit.
But we could.
Yeah.
We certainly could have.
Alright, Kroge.
That leads me to the next part of our show, which is known as the...
Grinch of the Week.
Grinch of the Week.
This one comes in from...
Steven from Canada.
I gotta pull up his note too.
Give me one second to find this.
He says, I'm from Canada.
And I heard some of the most shockingly unfunny
and cringy comedy on the radio this week.
Really?
This is from the CBC.
Ooh.
This is Taxpayer-funded radio, he says it all caps.
So you know where he's coming from with this already.
Apparently they have this show that's called Laugh Out Loud.
Oh boy.
And they play comedians and quotes that come on
and do their whatever nonsense is state sanctioned.
Yeah, state approved humor.
That's that sounds great.
In Canada.
So you could probably get a feel for what that's going to be.
It's going to be very harmless.
It's not going to offend anybody's sensibilities.
God is a good.
From the country that mandates that you play a little more set on the radio.
Yes.
Yes.
And you can't play dire straits.
It's actually banned in Canada.
Did you not know this?
Money for nothing.
You cannot play on the radio.
Because, oh, the character of the song, the character in the song says the Faggot with the
earring or whatever he says, the Faggot with the makeup. He's talking about Nikki Sixx
and he's playing the character who's the AC installer or whatever refrigerator delivery guy
and says this is what he's saying to his buddy,
the guy who's clearly portrayed as jealous
and not having a good time and not necessarily.
And Canada says, I don't understand any of this context.
I just heard Faggot, you can't play this,
I got the radio.
So Canada is zero except a humor.
And they don't understand how anything works.
Let's throw that out there.
This is a nasally vocal friee unfunny lesbian.
Oh, you're love, Emily Belting.
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Thank you, Ali!
Hi, friends!
Hello!
I paused it because I want to point out we have about a minute to go on this clip.
Oh, fuck. I mean, good.
I mean, what?
What you're going to hear, this is this woman's
beginning of her set.
Yeah.
And if you appreciate stand-up comedy,
you know that you want to get to punch lines quickly.
They actually are able to track how good a stand-up is
by how many laughs there are per minute.
This woman takes an entire minute building to a punch line
and waits for you here, this doozy of a punch line. Yeah, I use the word fucking doozy. I said do you know last week?
I'm saying doozy this week. I hope you fuck nice. Oh
This is my first time in late country. It's beautiful here. I love it
I just moved to Vancouver equally as beautiful first day. I got there. I bought a bicycle
I was riding along, ah, stunning, and mountains on one side, ocean on the other side,
gorgeous. I turned to look to see if there's a car behind me and all of a sudden,
I got dored. Do you all know what dored is? Yeah, when a car door opens and hits you,
so this happens, I fly off my bike. I look up. This little old lady walks
out of the car, comes up to me and is like, oh my God, sweetie, I'm so sorry. I didn't even see you coming.
And I was like, I hope not. Could you imagine if she was like,
hey, I freaking saw you!
But, duh!
Woo!
Wow.
I so I don't, I'm not a gym and I'm not a standup,
but I have to tell you,
most of that buildup could have been taken out.
Oh, there's mountains on this side,
there's an ocean over here, it was sunny that day,
it was 22 degrees Celsius, none of this shit matters.
Well, you say that, Carl,
but if you don't know that you just moved to the town
that whole joke doesn't work.
I think it's so worse.
Well, but then you don't know why she's on a bicycle.
It's fucking stupid.
Yeah, that's crazy, man.
Hold on.
That's a good cringe of the week.
Yeah, that's fantastic.
I got some cringe if you want it.
Oh, yes, please.
It's not.
Boy, it's not as good as that.
So, oh, sorry.
There's a show, it's called mogul.
It's podcast called mogul.
And this most recent season, they talk about two live crew.
And it's not a fantastic show,
but the case itself is fascinating.
I mean, dude, in 1990, it was illegal to buy a rap record.
You could be arrested for buying a rap record in Florida.
Two live crew was Luke Skywalker, right?
Yes, yeah, yeah.
Cool hand loop.
Yeah, so Luke Skywalker had a change his main
because, by the way, George Lucas owns that.
Is that a trademark?
Yeah, you think?
Yeah.
Luke Skywalker used the app word quite a bit
and talked about vaginas.
Like, what do you want to do with these vaginas?
It's just, it's just not legal in this country at the time.
It's crazy to think about this shit was bad.
Yeah, I think.
And like, I mean, 1990s ancient history,
but like hip hop was number one in the charts.
The Simpsons were on TV.
Like, there's a lot of our modern world you can recognize.
Anyway, so they did the best thing ever, which is they got the
people who started the lawsuits against Tuliv crew and asked them, what about Tuliv's
crew's music? Did you not like? So here's number 30.
Sat down on, you know, starting class. I'm sandwiched between two ladies and I've got my
Sony Walkman, you know, with headphones and a yellow legal pad, and I'm transcribing the lyrics to two live crew.
And this lady's giving me this look.
She's looking at my paper.
Do you remember the lyrics you were transcribing?
That would have put her into sort of alarm or shock.
Yeah, the song was called Badass Bitch.
And the lyric was, my dick was hard and she was hot like a heater.
By the looks of her mouth, she was a dick eater.
Euragity bitch, don't play dumb, put your dick in my mouth,
in your mouth and make this motherfucker come.
That's poetry.
And that is why the first amendment is beautiful.
So that someone can interview a Christian conservative and say,
so what was your least favorite to lie through here?
You said that you didn't think this podcast was that great. If it's more of this, I fucking love it. I'll listen to this all day.
Number 31 is this same guy. It's his analysis of the album. Okay. There were 87 descriptions of oral sex.
descriptions of oral sex.
There are 117 explicit references to male and female genitalia.
226 uses of the word fuck.
163 uses of the word bitch when referring to women.
They talked about male ejaculations nine times group sex four times or on anal sex. Is this guy promoting the album? Because I got
a list of this now. It sounds like a great album. And obviously that's there editing, not
mine. That's amazing to me
Like here's listen. I thought it was very offensive when he used the f word to talk about copulation
Yo, motherfucker. Let's fuck this bitch
Holy shit. I pull like an ISO of that. Please do that will be out the show for many years to come
Please do and then 32 is a different Christian conservative dude who started a lawsuit to make
Rapping illegal, but he compares it to the music of his youth. The lyrics
were rather disturbing and they were clever. Do you specific callouts of lyrics or commentary on the
album that you found? This is too much for kids. This is too much for young people. Well, you know,
the ones that I remember it's been a while, you know, lick my asshole till your tongue turns do-do brown.
That's, you know, that's real close
to Elvis's Love Me Tender.
And as you said, very clever.
Very clever.
It's your doctor's do-do brown.
God damn.
This sounds like the promotional package
for this album.
Did they put this out in 1990? Kurt Loaners, like, and now we have the promotional package for this album. Did they put this out in 1990, 90-curl owners like,
and now we have a promotional package to let's talk about.
Oh, good stuff.
Wow, that's good stuff, Crouch.
Thanks, you always bring something unique to the show.
And I appreciate that.
I want to get this out of the way.
We're going to make short work of it,
but I think it's time for this segment. Oh, man, oh the year, he went out to the West Coast.
I haven't let's do it yet,
but there's been a couple of shows posted
where it's him talking to Guy Fieri
and different people from the Food Network
and it's just, he's gonna go talk to anyone
and everyone who's ever known Karl Ruiz.
Yeah.
And that's what OP show is now.
And of course, selling the Karl Ruiz merchandise,
which I should have talked to Mike about.
Now I think about it.
Yeah. The hashtag Ruizing T Now, I think about it. Yeah.
The hashtag Ruizing T-shirts that we've all purchased since then.
But OP goes to La Cubana,
and there's like a memorial for Cal Ruiz.
It's not a formal memorial,
but apparently all of his friends are getting together.
And that's his restaurant.
It's his restaurant. Yeah.
And this is the restaurant where Opie would fuck with the staff,
would hang out in the kitchen while he's trying to cook
or figure out recipes.
Tell them to turn the radio off when people are dancing.
Opie is literally still fucking with Carl's restaurant,
even after Carl's death.
Oh my god, this is so embarrassing.
We're at La Cubana, another memorial for Carl.
I'm with Matt from Smoking Tire.
Embarrassing?
Yeah, it's embarrassing because they were just cranking,
cranking, biggie smalls and they turned it down
so we could podcast from Carl's memorial here at La Cubana.
So he's stopping the fun once again.
And Carl Ruiz tragically died at the age of 44
However, he loved life. He loved partying and dancing and I have to imagine that he would want his memorial service to be
People celebrating his life dancing having fun. See I got the opposite impression
I thought if there's one thing Carl Ruiz hated it was people enjoying themselves
And if he was his memorial would be like all right, stop having fun stop it over there. Shut down shut the fuck up. Oh be thinks the same thing there you go
Because this is what he did they were all dancing a biggie small
So they were girls might get on my cow crazy was that help us hey back
They just turned off biggie small so we can do this dumb podcast. How do you follow hypnotize?
Good lord, so they're giggling like school children so we can do this dumb podcast. How do you follow hypnotized? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha performing for people. They're like, alright, party's over. Opio over here is gonna talk to Vic Henley of all fucking people. And then Vic Henley, because on the show, you heard Mike Sappho right there go,
Vic get over here. So Vic Henley has to come in and make sure.
This is my last clip. I know, I see you're getting upset.
He has to go over and make sure that there is no fun to be had here.
He has to start fact checking.
And now the animals have really fucking kicked him
And I should point out they're also high. Oh good. Which is great
You know you always want to be out of animals when he's back as a good at it anyway
Why not give him a disadvantage and now the animals have really fucking kicked him and now we're in a lot of
Bonna have you guys cut a little more the jello slices? I love it when you call me big papa
Yeah, they've sampled between the sheets
by the ijli bro.
Oh, there you go.
And then they were playing the next one,
I think, is Hitman Chai.
Yeah.
He's like, guys, you were saying that they did this
and they were playing that.
What actually happened was the music was thick, whatever.
That wasn't the point of the conversation.
They were just talking about how they stopped everybody's fun.
And by the way, Vic, you're a big part of stopping everybody's fun. I'm very big part of you when you open your mouth
They kindly ain't nobody ever fun and I know that what I'm saying is true because man Carl knows his shit
You got that right Alfie straight from the words as mouth. You got that right
Crows I gave you a separate assignment this week not Not only did you have to listen to Ryan, but I also said, we gotta talk about my boy,
Shamest McKillian.
The one and only.
Because this dude has a new podcast out.
I don't know if it's a podcast.
I've only seen it on YouTube.
I don't know if he's putting it out for so-
Yeah, it's tough.
So finding his shit isn't possible.
Yeah, it's impossible. And finding his shit isn't possible yeah it's
finding his shit by the name of his shit is also impossible but he does have a
podcast feed that's like everything on his network oh really so it's like
shows all mixed together okay but it's hard to make heads or tails of
whatever so he has a show called mostly normal and it's with his girlfriend
Carly yeah and I actually I listen to an intro to this where where he introduces the show before Carly even becomes a part of it.
So if you want to hear that, like, this is his setup to it.
So, number 20, why is it called mostly normal?
Mostly normal.
And the reason that is is because that's how I feel.
And I think that's how we feel is, we're basically normal.
But I think it's a huge understatement because I don't think we are normal at all.
Wait, what did he just say?
So, he just say nothing in a circle.
English not his thing.
But to say that, to say that he's mostly normal is an understatement because he's not normal at all.
So don't don't diagram that sentence because it's not my brain hurts.
It's not going to be good time for you. But the second question that is on your lips,
I can see it right now, who was Carly, number 21. But yeah, I look forward to recording very soon
with the lady, you know, the queen of mostly normal.
You know the queen of mostly normal
Look I never been in the situation, but if your old lady is paying all your bills get you all your groceries If let you just sit at home smoke weed and podcast all day you better call her a fucking queen
Real smart you kiss that ass because that free ride is it is not gonna last forever so you enjoy it my man
So this is a guy who does 20 plus podcasts.
At least.
He puts out episodes every day.
Concentrate.
Multiple episodes of every podcast every day.
He's a stay-at-home dad, which is a well-documented.
And then I get noticed from people,
like, yeah, I'm a stay-at-home dad.
I'm not shitting on that.
Certainly.
A lot of stay-at-home dads are probably good parents.
Oh, yeah, the beat of stay-at-home dad is not easy work.
What? Make productive use of their time. This guy is doing none of that, it's being a productive is not easy work. But make productive use of
their time. This guy is doing none of that. He's just a
loser. Staring into IMDB speaking into a
lovelier mic while your kids in the corner
crime does not make a good stay at home dad. No, it's
the opposite of that. So he's decided that he's
going to do a podcast with his girlfriend who he's
kind of putting out through his lifestyle. He's kind of
forcing her like you said,
to do all the heavy lifting.
But there's a trade-off.
But there's a trade-off.
Because she gets to enjoy in this fucking dynamic content.
Yes.
Let's talk about the dynamic content.
Let's talk about it.
Because it's fucking electric.
All right, Kroge, I have zero clips of the show.
Let's talk.
I read out a text.
Let's do it.
All right.
But there was a segment that somebody posted on our subreddit.
I don't know if it was a tease to the show, it was only seven minutes long.
And I listened to it intently.
Can I just say that you just made my whole fucking morning?
Good. Let's go.
Let's get into it.
Alright, number 22.
I'm so excited about those.
This is the electrified conversation.
This is why, you know, sometimes you meet a couple and they're like two sides of a coin
You mean like they're just they're meant to be they have a dynamic
They just they go back and forth like an expert tennis match and it's so great to watch they're like that
This is number 22, but man being in the jungle. Yeah, lions. Yeah, yeah, but keep in mind most animals like that are more afraid of a human than they are
Then you are a bit. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know, so it seems like Curly wants nothing to do with this.
This is the point that I wanted to get to.
I'm already saying that.
You would think that he's saying, all right, I said I'm in podcasts all day long.
I'll tell you what, I know you really want to do a podcast with me.
I'll do it.
We'll call it mostly no one.
We'll put it out.
She wants nothing to do with this.
The first game they play is, would you rather?
Yes.
And so that was whatever that was from his.
Now, then she-
Hold on a second.
I know, I want to get to that.
I'm very excited about that.
The first question was, would you rather be lost
in a desert or a jungle?
He asked Carly that and we just played the answer.
Where she says, well, I guess a desert,
because there wouldn't be lions.
I forget what the reasoning was, it was really stupid.
Now, and you would think that a hypothetical like that,
you would just leave it at face value,
but fucking retard, Sheamus says,
well, that's the wrong answer.
You'd want to be in a jungle,
because in a jungle there's food and shade, shelter.
She was, oh, okay, I guess that's the answer.
Then why are you playing this game?
You just wanted to convince her that your opinion
was the one that was right.
No, none of this makes a whole lot of it.
All right, let's get into the next part.
So then she turns to him and it's time for her
to ask him a question.
Now I want to be super, super clear.
I'm not going to yuck anybody's yum.
Whatever you're into is what you're into.
And I love you for it, man.
You'll be you, let that freak flag fly!
But number 23.
Would you rather suck a dick or get fucked in the ass?
Oh, I was sucking a dick all day.
For sure?
Oh, 100%.
100%.
That's not even a real would you rather?
Because I would not-
Is he just sucking my dick?
I would just suck a dick and just
rather do it 100% because there's an everlasting effect to
penetration of the anal glands so lasting effect they could change it.
They're on a dick in your mouth. I mean, easy, easy, easy. That's, I mean, sucking a dick all day.
Sucking a dick all day.
I would just suck a dick.
Now, I like that it's not even two seconds.
There's no hesitation.
Oh, I would suck that cock.
Now, now listen, man.
And again, like whatever their couple of dynamic is,
whatever the other thing, it like,
you guys do you, man, I don't give a shit.
But there ain't no straight woman in the world
that wants to hear her man be like
Man, I want to suck some dick. There's just that's just not happening and I there's no straight woman in the world
Who'd be like hey to my my man my partner like
What the fuck is going on can I tell you close and why is this why is there bedroom shit?
Why am I being forced to listen to this and is this all your fault car?
Oh, why is this it could fault car? Why is this?
I have to contemplate his love of putting penis in his mind.
Very possible.
This is all my fault.
I want to point something out.
I heard this clip.
Yeah.
And even with the W does Dallas.
Not with the W does Dallas.
You've put some reduction behind it.
But I listen to this and I don't know how you feel about me.
I'm a little bit of an opportunist.
Really?
Yes. I heard this at like dollar size, whatever that chitching sound is started going off.
Like this is gold. And I was going to pull that clip of you hand, but I looked at your list
and I saw Sucking Dick was a name of one of your cousin. Good.
Close your status. Thank God. Because we have to talk about this.
What fucking guy would go on a podcast?
Talk about sucking dick is clearly concisely as shame is just did you what you'd want to say and I just listen
There's no way to wrong answer here. It's not a cool, but you might want to say like oh, I gotta do one of those things
Yeah, oh, that's disgusting. I can't even imagine. I mean, if I had to do one of
the things, so go into my head, right? Right? Go into my head. And then this, this is how
you do it, Carl. You go this, you go, I would do the ladder. There you go. Never say the words.
I would suck a dick because we're going to use that on our show. Oh, we're over. It's
something already made a song with it. PJ put together a song. I can't wait to play this
for everybody. Remember this guy can't say we're shit
But I like his lyrics that's the same PJ. Oh, all right. I'm warmer up to you peach
And to tell yeah that he drove through Gary and Vienna
He's alive, yeah there's just no way that he drove through that plane
There's a girl I'm parlor that he did break
Made with a child, let's call him baby, Shayne
There's no charisma, charisma's not her thing
But it's all so not times
I heard Tatsukar like
You're my girlfriend
Start a podcast with me
Mostly normal podcasts
And then you can tell everyone that I've been through Gary
And I most definitely won't forget
So hold on listening to his lies
When he says he's been through Gary
We all know that he'd rather die
Than drive through a place so scary
But now I'll tell you the truth
Because Todd's not an honest man
No shame as he never drove through Gary India
There's a podcast W-A-T-P hosted my car of
age 43
I think you have a car will disagree
He thinks your line about you never fucking drive it through here
I'm good
You're my girl friend
So I'm podcast with me
Mostly normal podcast
And then you can tell everyone that I'm pretty good
I might definitely go to jail
You said car lane My girlfriend I want that for a joke again. He said Karlai, my girlfriend, I think it's time to come clean.
No, I've never really been to Gary.
So don't ever doubt me again.
Ooh, all right.
That's something I was the whole sucking dick thing
because they played a quick clip at the beginning,
but it was really about driving through Gary and Deanna.
I got that.
As you figured out,
Kroger's just like,
are we gonna keep talking about Gary?
Yep.
That's the only subject we're talking about.
They can't just any would suck a dick on his butt,
guess this guy's like,
I gotta do a parody song about Gary and Deanna.
I know it's just been quite a roller coaster,
but I'm, I'm sour on PJ again.
What?
I'm not liking him like now. Are you kidding me? I mean mean we're just losing your shit laughing at that talk. This could turn it could turn
Okay, you know
He had me for the first like minute and a half of that nine minute Odyssey. I like hey you want to talk about James's podcast a little more
Yeah, so let's do it. Uh boy. There's some bad transitions on there man. Here's number 24 him coming out of a bit
But that is what you rather guys. Hopefully hopefully enjoyed that we're going into the next
segment right now. Hold on to your things. Hold on to your gerangus.
Yeah hold on to something.
It's this sound effect is music.
Hold on to your gerangus.
Gerangus.
And I'm sorry I should explain that. What the fuck did she just say?
I don't know.
I put that at the end because I was going to say what the fuck did she just say? I don't know I put that at the end I cuz I was gonna say what the fuck did she say so hold on to your gerangus or what
Plus she missing know what to say you would say hold on to your hats, right something he goes hold on to your thing
And then they they follow that transition with the glass breaking sound right and then into metal music
I'm just like I don't know what was going on
I mean normally his podcast have a lot of great sound effects
But this one he missed a mark
Yeah, well, yeah when you crash and burn you don't normally want to put a crash and burn
Thing there to signify it
I just crash yeah, what else do that idiot don't do it for us
But they play a great game and these are three boring ass clips, but just bear with me. Number 25 is the introductions of the game.
Okay guys, so this segment we'd like to call Who Would Win?
And this is a segment that we came up with pretty much as soon as we came up with the show.
And basically what's gonna happen is I'm gonna come up with two people that should fight, that should battle to the death.
And Carly has to decide who she thinks would win and vice versa.
She might not have one for me because she doesn't prepare for the show
Oh, she might not have one for me because she doesn't prepare for the show easy
Shots fired take it easy
But just in case you missed it the flow of the game called who would win. Yes, is that someone picks who would win
So it's a fight we just who would win that's all that's you know, I know it's a lot to keep track of but just keep that in your mind
It number 26 they play the game my gas or whatever the whatever and would you who do you think would win?
Your dad versus your grandpa
I'm kidding. I don't have that it says Brad Pitt versus Liam Neeson
I would say Brad Pitt I don't know see more built than Liam Neeson, but
Maybe not okay fascinating. I'm so glad they hit record on this
But number 27 they dig a little deeper into this fascinating topic of who would win
So you're saying age plays a factor, but yet
Lamb Neeson is still kicking ass in movies
Of course in movies, but you've never seen them real life. I've had in real life. He's a fucking pussy. Oh his wife died
Oh, so he can't be a pussy because his wife died. Oh, that just means he's been through
some shit. These are two horrible people having a horrible conversation about nothing. But I will say
like as a as a betting man and I want to give you my gambling advice here. When you're betting on
a boxing match, if one of them is a widow or you always bet on that. That's from Shamus to you.
Well, again, Shamus and his girlfriend had this weird dynamic.
Shamist says, come on in this show.
We're gonna do a podcast together.
He says, all right, this is a game where I throw out
two people's names, you tell me who would win.
And then I argue with you.
And what?
No matter what she says, he goes, that's wrong.
Yeah.
Well, what are we talking about?
Then you asked her her opinion and then immediately told
her she was wrong.
Yeah.
Because you've seen a movie where this 72 year old guy
kicks some ass. Whatever and but then she turns around and asks him one this is
number 28
let's do Joshua right
and not a person I've heard of who fuck his Josh rod
What his name
Paul all right
Stop. Here, look what I want to have.
I think it's not a job for a writer.
Don't do drugs.
If you're doing it, stop it.
Get some help.
Thank you, Michael Jordan.
That old gag.
Now, we call that a callback out of the podcast.
I just want to say, kids out there,
if you're listening to me right now,
don't smoke marijuana because if you smoke marijuana, you might find yourself in a year's long relationship and have a couple kids with some freeloader who can't even speak a fucking sentence.
Carly has wasted and this was pointed out in our separate attempt.
She sounds highly sedated.
Holy shit.
She can't even get a fucking sentence out.
And her trying to remember the name Paul Rod is just a minute of them giggling at each other
Yeah, these are stupid people having a stupid conversation. I would agree
This is just to put a bow on it. This is from the legendary nine minute podcast
This clip is number 29. It's called even the voices in his head are stupid
This is a podcast that is easy to make in video form.
Why is that?
You ask?
Well, what a dumb question and it's because it's only nine.
It's only nine minutes.
Not hard to figure that out.
You've got to conversation the heavy with himself.
What the fuck?
Even the voices in his head aren't just as stupid as everything's like why would you ask that well that's a stupid fucking question let me explain
to me why that's so stupid that's impressive any final thoughts on shavis fucking exhaust
thank you for pulling that together for us broge I will say I didn't have shamus clips I plan to
but it's because Andy's coming over in a little bit,
we're gonna do a bonus episode.
We're gonna talk about the vanished.
Woo!
Getting back to my friend, M. Jones,
whatever her name is.
We're gonna talk about that person again.
And we're also, I guess I'm settling John's stuff.
So we're gonna have a very exciting bonus episode.
Coming up after this.
But I do have one other thing that I wanted to play
I talked about it last week. I wasn't able to pull clips pat O to the guy who we made fun of
We certainly did because somebody reached out to me and I happen to just meet him at Anthony Kumi a show
And he got back on Anthony Kumi a show and starts off by talking about us, which I appreciate
I said I'm a lot like thanks, thanks, Pat Oates is here today. All right, everyone.
Which is really good.
We had a great time when you were last on the program.
Oh, the blast.
Change my life.
Change your life, right?
Yeah.
And then I hear the, who are these podcasts, guys?
I had to hold my podcast and run right through the ringer.
Just beat me to fuck up, right away.
Got the message from Carl. Carl, message me and said, hey, I'm going to be right to the ringer. Just beat me to fuck up right away. I got the message from Carl.
Carl messaged me and said, hey, I hope you don't mind.
We're going to do your podcast.
And then they just torn me the fall.
Oh, my God. That's great.
It was great.
I enjoyed it.
It was fine. He was nervous.
What do you guys say before he said he was nervous.
He's like, you know, I hope you don't beat me up or anything.
I'm like, no, that's what you guys do.
Yeah, he catches a lot of shit.
Of course he catches a lot of shit for his show
So show is like hey, I'm an asshole and I'm gonna ruin someone's dreams
It's a good theme. I like there's a good thing to aspire to ruin people's dreams. I was I was involved in one of his dreams
Yeah, I think like that ruin
It's got a good sense of humor. Oh, that's great and
I was like, that's got a good sense of humor. Oh, that's great.
And starts off the eighth and akumia show,
promoting W-A-T-P, which we always appreciate.
But it didn't end there, Kroesh.
Jim Norton comes out in the show.
And you might know this, Jim Norton and I are BF ops.
We're like this.
Yeah.
We're constantly texting with each other.
What did Suttery Jets say?
I know, right?
What an idiot.
These text messages are going back and forth all day long
Cuz Jim's out of busy guy. Of course I he comes on the show and at the very end of the Anthony Cumia show
Once again Jimmy's plugging stuff and then they let Pat plug his stuff and then just check out my podcast that Carl destroyed
You can check that. Yes. Yes. Yeah, these podcasts destroyed me. We kept right
I give him credit was it was hilarious. I laughed at how much they should on me and my voice and everything but we had those guys
They were he was on chip. Oh really yeah, it was fun
Fucking things out of it. Oh, yeah, yeah, those guys that chip. Yeah, you were there with me. We went over there together
Anthony you and I traveled together to the alright which is really funny because then Pat actually is a very good line here
after that he had his make a wish day you got to meet you and you and then I
got destroyed so I'm surprised I've been done a review a chip that would be kind
of full that before I like that curl head is make a wish day where I got to
hang out with Anthony and then Jim Dorton I mean pretty pretty actually not
wrong if I had cancer would make a lot more sense.
Yeah.
Well, day in all of yet.
It's true.
Kroge, at this time in the podcast,
I am going to take a piss break.
Ooh.
And what I wanted to do while I'm taking said piss break
is play a little bit of Angel Dussen Hoffman.
Now, Angel Dussen Hoffman is a band that you and I were in, what, 10 years ago, plus?
Yeah, 2005.
It was about, oh wow, okay.
Why, why, why, why, time, I guess.
Not cool.
And I mean, 2018.
We've had a couple of people ask about these songs,
and I was like, I don't think we have a website
or anything up anymore.
So what I did is I went ahead and posted them on a soundcloud page.
Hey, DNH lips.
Yeah, it's on a who are these podcasts soundcloud page?
Oh, that's funny.
Yeah, so I figured I will play this while I go take a piss break and we'll be back in a minute, everybody. How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you?
How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? So I'm great about the arm and the gurus I can tell you what happened
Cause any sweet or any sweet I can't get any details
But I'll tell you what's big
She had three and plus
Her match is right for me
She had three
But she could count to one, two, three
But she could count to three
Plus 17 to two
She had three But I hope we do the booze I counted 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, 1, 7, 8 what I needed, she had three
And she was the one with you and me, she had three
And she was the state of honor, she had three
But then the snow and she meets you, she had three
And she was not a one real sight, she had three
And only two were fighting, she had three
And we're real, no one else to see
And she had three but she had three and was real, though she seemed She had three and was and three
Here's to she's 19
Every time I drop her off at home I'm gonna take, I don't care about it
Every minute that we finally have a note
I'm gonna take, I don't care about it
In a plan time necessary, I think we're best friends
You wouldn't know that every time we go out
I'm back up to the end
And so now I am just one bunch of two ass
Why ever we fuck each other?
I don't say
Why ever we fuck each other?
I'm telling you, why now?
Why ever we fuck each other?
Baby, I got out of my way to get you
For now, it'll be a night you won't get
That because I'm getting up with me
He's put the nighttime won't regret
Why haven't we fucked yet?
Why haven't we fucked up?
We find out why haven't we fucked yet?
Why don't you say?
I already know that you're being around
Every time you stop at the second base
I pretend I don't care about it
Every time you won't come back to my place
I pretend I don't care about it
I don't wear name break clothes
You know I can't be gay
Do you think that I can't buy a drink?
Cause you're out by my front swing
And my blue balls gonna talk out to the same team Why are we fighting? Why are we fighting? Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting?
Why are we fighting, yeah, why I'm saying What?
Oh, we're bad, get rid of that.
Stop hitting me so much goddamn fun.
Let's get back into the podcast.
Seriously.
Seriously.
Alright, it's now time for everybody's favorite part of the show. Oh, cheers. Thanks for the cheers. Thanks for the cheers.
The teaser.
Thanks for the cheers.
The teaser.
The teaser.
This is the part of the show we play a clip from Next Week's podcast.
A clip of a podcast that will be reviewing, I should say.
Here is said clip.
I know you'd know this right away.
This is why we need video so we can show us bouncing on the room like pounding our chest.
Why would you name your band?
Well, there's a story about that.
Does it matter?
I guess it does, go ahead, tell a story.
Apparently, one of the Gallagher brothers said in an interview
that Oasis were the Beatles and the Stones
and that Blur were the monkeys.
That's pretty funny.
So monkeys, gorillas.
Ah.
This is a show called, Crosier.
Your favorite band sucks.
Your favorite band sucks.
And what we're doing next week is a who's right takeover.
It's not just Doug from Who's Right.
He's been on the show many times.
It's Doug and Anthony.
Ooh.
Coming on the show to discuss your favorite band sucks.
Yeah.
It's gonna be a little bit of a different format.
I will be pulling zero clips.
Ooh.
Because, girls, we have a show that night.
Yeah.
We're playing a three heads brewing.
Are we ever?
We're covering all of chocolate and cheese,
the 1994 Ween album.
We have a lot of guest musicians.
There's a lot of things to coordinate
for this rock show we're doing.
So I don't wanna be fucking pulling clips at night
I'm on that Saturday. You don't want to be you don't want to listen to two drunks
Y'all think about how much they hate the band slipknot. I kind of do I saw this
I'm intrigued by this. I think it's gonna be fun
But I've asked Doug and this was by the way Doug and Anthony suggestion to do this
I've asked them to do all
of the heavy lifting for me.
I'm just a lot for the ride.
There you go.
So I'm very excited about this.
This should be fun.
That'll be funny.
Of course, we're gonna wrap things up
before I do.
Is there anything that you would like to plug?
Yeah, I will be on the saw-breddit later,
and I forgot to come up with the funny name.
Damn it!
I know.
It's the one the account I need for. Usually it's something to call back with the funny name. Damn it! It's the one that I count on you for!
Usually it's something to call back to the episode.
Ryan Hart, Shamist or something.
Yeah, go with that.
That's what I'll be.
I'll clip that together in post.
It'll sound seamless.
Croch, I want to thank you very much for your time.
Of course, thanks for that.
As always, you brought it the clips.
Specifically.
You brought the clips. Which is more like a safer video.
Yeah, it shows up on the fucking blank US B drive.
Oh yeah, that's it.
It was fucking great.
All right, please join us again next week
because honestly, it might be the episode
where we find out once and for all.
Who are these podcasts?
Sleep well, every single pony.
Party in the mush piss of morning radio.
Get out and show is called Right Now.
Hmm.
OK.
Great show.
Good job, everybody.
Great job, everyone. I'm gonna be the best I'm gonna be the best I'm gonna be the best
I'm gonna be the best
I'm gonna be the best
I'm gonna be the best
That's my complete goal
And the show has reached a new low
Park your home I don't know.
I don't get it.
Makes no sense.
Alright, let's get into voicemails.
We gotta move quickly because I have more
prep work to do. For the show I'm doing with Andy in about an hour that'll be a
Patreon-only bonus episode. I have to subscribe to the Patreon, which we have a
lot of subscribers. It's very exciting. Yeah. But we encourage more people to
go on there. We'll have a bonus episode every single month if not more than one.
I forgot to mention. What'd you forget?
Shameless as a Patreon.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Did you click on it?
I've looked at it before it had zero patrons.
Is it still have zero?
Yeah, it's amazing.
And it's not just a single, it's not just one of his podcasts.
It's not like you can say, like,
it's just not even a podcast doesn't have a lot of fans.
It's just whole network.
It's an entire network of shows.
You only promote one Patreon, he makes zero dollars.
That's amazing. Thank guys getting that sweet, sweet anchor F.M. money. Yeah, really. Network of shows you only promote one patreon. He's makes zero dollars
Think guys getting that sweet sweet anchor F.I. Money. Yeah, because it's not for that
He would be like a loser who just doesn't make any money at his girlfriend supports him So thank god he's got the anchor F.I. Money really keeping him afloat. It really is I
Don't know. I mean do I want to be in his manifesto kind of?
I feel like there's no thing as bad publicity.
Well, yeah, this show will be discussed on the national news.
That's the point.
Because of Shameless's fucking rampage in a Walmart.
Or a target.
What a target.
I don't wanna say Walmart because that hits too close.
I'm gonna go back and she does that.
And fuck.
All right.
Stuttering John's attorney called into the show.
This is...
Oh, no. Dude, this fucking fucking saga will not and I wanted to add
Crouch I barely talk about it. This is terrible. Hi Carl. This is Lenny the lawyer calling again
And it's really upsetting to me that you've been playing my voice notes as well as
Stuttering John's podcast on this shitty little podcast
of yours.
You know that it's copy written, right?
You know, I've written it down.
You can't copy it.
You can't play it on your voice notes.
You can't play my voice on your voice notes.
It's definitely illegal.
We are totally filing this very real, very legally binding lawsuit against the use.
So just cut it out right now.
Cut it out to stop doing it.
I hope you take this seriously because it's very real.
Okay.
Very, very legal.
Very real.
Sounds like it's very cool.
It's very cool.
I'm going to tell you something to turn it.
I'll call it back.
I will do one in the lawyer.
Thanks for calling in, buddy.
Yeah.
I mean, I don't have boots on right now, but if I did, I would be shaking in them.
Yeah.
I'm a little bit nervous about this whole thing.
Yeah, you are here by so advised to shake in your boots.
I just played a couple angel dust and Hoffman songs and somebody called in talking about that whole thing.
Oh, Joy.
Hey, it's me Carl from whom our podcast.
whom are podcasts.
Anyways, uh, if you thought you didn't get enough of shilling of one band, the isotopes, which I've been, which crojas in,
then get ready for this.
Angel Dustin Hoffman. Anyways, any reason to chill in any of my musical projects, it's all good. That's exactly what I want.
But no, like, Angel Duffinov, I mean, he's a really cool band-name.
Anyway, call me Jack.
Really an impression of me right there. That was great.
So I mentioned that we would be fun to do a white supremacist podcast.
Oh, what an effort.
And I've been getting one specific podcast recommended quite a bit.
Anthony, can we show Carl?
I thought Carl, Inspector Blore.
Yeah, you don't know, we don't worry about that.
Hey, just have no easy
to do to get on the voicemail signal home. Pretty easy. You and Kay are talking about
possibly doing a light supremacist podcast on the last episode of the Justin Long
One. Well, as somebody who cosplays as Hitler from time to time on TikTok, YouTube, and
Twitch, I was your miss if I didn't recommend the Daily Show. People whose drops are second only to you sir, only to you.
I think I hit all the high notes here, make sure I tap this off right, band practice.
Call me back.
Really, really a voice bell my friend.
So this Daily Show uh, show uh, yes I've gotten this a number of times.
Okay.
It seems to be pretty anti-semitic.
Oh, good.
So that's just what you want to hear.
It'll be a lot of fun.
Yeah, that's just what you want.
Well, bro, does that like me?
Is that like we praise podcasts around here?
That's true.
I'm not gonna say like,
well, they make up some good points here.
But I want to say,
I 100% believe that guy dresses up like Hitler on wine.
That's hilarious.
I totally believe that.
He should have left the
URL's yeah many many a truth to set in Jess my friend. All right
Drunk guy likes us. Oh good
Hey, Carl how's it going man? I just want to say you're feeling it man
Carl's clean it highest clean it
Dog is clean it keep up the good work man. Can't wait to hear it again. How a good day?
I couldn't help it. I had to play that voice bell. That's someone who's black out drunk. Yeah
What I could not understand a wordy was saying what did did he say you are? You're bling it?
I think we're killing it, buddy.
Killing!
I think we're killing it.
I'm pretty sure.
Oh, God.
I thought he's, yeah.
It sounded like you were a blanket or something.
I could not fucking make that up.
So fortunately I speak drunk.
Oh, good.
I know that language very, very well.
I've been known to him for a bad time myself.
Here is someone complaining about the fact
that I stole their KKK idea
Hey Carl a sweet joke
Stealing fucking war
You stole my KKK joke for Carl Kevin and Kaya
So I demand compensation here. I either get a guest spot on the show. No, I get an episode 88 or something maybe quality joke right there
Fuck you my joke also fuck Vic. I ate his or her voice
Oh, I'm gonna content her. Don't you talk bad about Vic in front of me
Thank you for the back squeaks. I see that you are in the discord right now
I thought I gave credit on that one when I mentioned that you are in the discord right now. I thought I gave credit on that one when I mentioned
that somebody wrote in the discord.
Maybe I didn't say your name.
Yeah, I'll adjust.
When you post jokes in the discord,
if I happen to look at it and say it,
you've given it to me.
Yeah, you belong to the ages.
Correct.
When you post in the discord, you are.
Just appreciate that you're helping the show.
Yeah.
Feel good about it to yourself. Like it's like giving to charity. You know what I go around telling everyone you get to charity or that you're helping the show. Yeah. Feel good about it to yourself.
Like it's like giving to charity.
You know what I go around telling everyone
you get to charity or that you were to joke, I said.
Yeah.
Just be happy that you could tribute it.
It's a very socialist approach to humor.
It's right.
We're all in this together.
We are joking here.
Not you or me, we joke.
To friend Drescher called it to the show.
No shit.
I mean, she does have a lot of time on her hands.
I'm not surprised she found that we were making fun of her, but she called it. In between. Oh shit. I mean, she does have a lot of time on her hands. I'm not surprised she found,
then we were making fun of her,
but she called it in between any reunions.
Yes.
Hey, Carl, what's to me?
Grand Russia.
I just ran the call and you said that.
You were being a real,
but I had a matte blush podcast with yours.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Brush her. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha Oh
Get well soon Fred
Sure right?
That's got you really helps
That was clear That was clear of, uh, uh, pulling back.
Yeah, did you know that Scotch had cancer?
What?
Yeah, that Scotch he was drinking had cancer.
Oh my god.
So tragic.
Everything in her life is so tragic.
Yeah, it's really too bad.
I was drinking vodka.
They got raped the other day.
Yeah, that's terrible.
It's too bad. It's too bad. It's too bad. It's really too bad. I was drinking vodka. They got raped the other day. Yeah, it's terrible. It's too bad. It's too bad
It's a shame. Here is someone talking about Justin Brown
Do you know Justin Brown is he's been on the show a couple times? Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Cole. Oh, right. Yeah, it's because
Hey Carl last week you said when responding to a voice mail that Justin Brown wasn't a comedian
I'm on your website who are these calm? You know what the description says for episode 174?
This week comedian Justin Brown joins the show. Wow! I guess he is a comedian then!
Did I say he wasn't a comedian? There is a reason why I know Justin Brown is because I met him doing a stand-up.
Yeah, what the fuck?
He won the Rose Battle in roster two years in a row,
which means he's a funny guy in Rochester.
I don't know what that means, actually.
Yeah, yeah.
But then again, he know co-hosts a show
with Todd Gerson and Paul Perimiko.
So maybe he isn't a comedian.
Ha ha ha.
You might be out of something there.
I'm gonna stop defending this guy.
All right, Sheamus has a low IQ according to this collar. What?
Hey, Carl and cohost. I didn't want to be calling with a message about last week's episode.
The part with sheamus Nikita or whatever his name is. She was a tide up.
The whole thing where he said he was outside staring at the rain trying to see stars at 4.30
in the morning. Yeah, that's amazing. And he starts podcasting at the rain, trying to see stars at 4.30 in the morning.
Yeah.
That was amazing.
And he starts podcasting at 8 a.m.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's no context of anything else happening between those two points.
Okay.
Correct.
So was he just standing out in the rain in his trailer park, staring at the rain?
Yeah.
Says Bob.
Well, yeah. I'm pretty sure you might be
cyberbullying someone with a very low IQ. That's we worried about that for a while, sir.
Just wanted to say that. I'm predicting it. We've sure was up in that, you know. Yeah.
We've been to Watt. We have definitely talked about that because
we have definitely talked about that because
Sir, not only was he standing out just staring at the rain,
he was remembering when rain was like legitimately the shit.
People don't remember that, but rain used to be legitimately the shit.
Legitimately. I mean, there's no, you can't. So what's suggested I make a t-shirt with that saying?
That's a pretty good idea. That is amazing. Do you remember when rain was legitimately like the shit? Yeah, it's make a t-shirt with that saying that's a pretty good idea
You're a reward rain was legit. I like the shit. Yeah, that's the good t-shirt. It's quite a quote
I'm going out that there was a character a wack packer on how was surname dog Wendy the retard Yeah, and they've you know in these PC times they've changed your name to Wendy the slow adult
Maybe we should refer to shameless as
your name to Wendy the slow adult. Maybe we should refer to Shamus as Shamus the slow adult so that we don't seem like we're just making fun of a guy with a low IQ. We understand
the voices. Howard at least pretended he would have Gary the retard on. Yeah three times a
minute. Gary the conqueror. But he would pretend that everyone was laughing with Gary the retot. We are without a doubt laughing at that fucking idiot, James.
You don't even mean like there's just, there's no, we can't pretend we're on his side,
we can't pretend we're just like, oh, long for the ride and laughing.
Maybe you're laughing at, I'm laughing with.
I thought that their dynamic was fantastic.
That guy is fucking dangerously stupid.
It's dangerous.
Dangerous. It's why trailer parks exist
Because people like that with that type of low IQ exists in this world. There's no coincidence that he can't find employment
You know what I'm saying? I don't think you're thinking but I hear you saying well, it's not like you went to McDonald's and they're like well
Shit can you work a fucking it's interesting you say that though? Oh a second we haven't explored this now is the unemployed because he was too because he can't find employment and I would argue
The guy can type
He can talk and he could swim all three things. He took in high school
Over and got and got better at true. Well, how is he not employable?
But he came to an even way like if I saw a resume that said I could talk type and swim
I'm like you're coming to my company that let's do this, but we've both read his typing
He can't type a complete sentence that makes that has a
Proposition I was joking. I know he's a fucking idiot. I get it
He can't speak in a complete sentence, but he can work a microphone
He can't make his podcast like accessible that you can find him, but yet somehow they're on iTunes.
You don't have to say anything like that.
He's a minute of any contradictions.
It's very confusing.
There's a lot of layers to peel back on the onion
that is Dick Sucking Shamist.
It is all very confusing.
This is a guy who works in Gary Indiana.
Maybe he has some insights into the shames and is psyche.
Hey, Carl, this is your Arabic buddy.
Have I ever been working in Gary, Indiana for the past five years?
You poor soul.
So Mr. Shamist or Todd or the fuck you on a calm dinner
really do that big and accomplishment,
driving across because I want a daily basis.
You think you're a man.
So yeah, that dude can, uh, that dude's fucking weird.
So yeah, follow me back.
Love you baby.
Love you too.
Appreciate you working in Gary Indiana.
It's nice terrible.
Yeah, I saw what he's got too.
Alright, somebody's upset that we have a patron.
A fucking patron call.
Are you kidding me?
You've now completed the circle of podcast douche baggary.
Yeah.
PayPal, merch.
Yep.
Patreon.
Oh, drunk collars.
Yeah.
Fucking cock.
You do it all now.
Fucking cock.
Yeah.
Fucking believe that I have to get some assholes.
$5 a month now to hear you talk about shame.
It's got damage.
Really got to do it.
But coming back, let's talk about it.
All right, let's talk about it, buddy.
I am well aware.
Unlike Ryan, I myself awareness. I know that I've been around a long enough to
become what I've hated. Yeah, of course. I get it. Let's get
back into this shameless thing. He talked about the fact
that only people who live in Indiana would understand that
it rains outside. He looked at fart grotesque. He looked at
Syracuse and Rochester. Did Ray do the places? No, it doesn't
rain. No, it doesn't rain. So you didn't understand that either. I actually had to look it up after he would his show
What does that mean with the PD?
So apparently it does rain in other places
Hey Carl, this is Paul the dirty Armenian from Utah and no relation to Maddox
Wow, I just listened to this chance to kill you and bullshit about rain
Motherfucker, I live in Utah and it's been raining for the last three fucking weeks.
Shannon's can suck my fat dirty Armenian dick.
Well, you might.
He's a shit.
Let's go for him once to watch.
Get fucked.
And get back on Dick's show.
Love you, Motherfuckers.
I stayed for Kaya.
Get that.
Alright.
There you go.
Kaya getting some love.
We always like that. This is somebody who says it also rains in Maryland it's two there afternoon and
it's I'm in Maryland and the fucking raining I'm baffled I'm baffled I don't know what to do
know what to do all right so maybe these people do exist shavish you were right
there are people with rates out there don't know what to do with Alright so maybe these people do exist, Shavish, you were right. There are people with
rates out there who don't know what the fuck to do with themselves. Oh man. Alright what
is this? Carl I just wasn't that first episode where you plug this whole Patreon shit.
Yep. If I go on there, you know you're one of the couple podcasts I was new. Throw a
fiber in I'm like what do you fuck you call the bag slappers and that's a fact and get a little content
real
clock and supercourt of five minute
little comedy bit
something to listen to no nothing
no content
instantly i hit the five dollar and locks your page
no post
uh...
thanks for you got a hundred and what eight of us dickheads just sitting here giving you money, giving
a shit.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Fuck you, dude.
Now, can I just say?
Please.
Who's the fool in that equation?
I mean, I mean, if I stop smiling this entire time, I am not.
Alright, let me point something out real quick.
Number one, you get a thank you message from me that I typed myself
Really did it includes a link to episode 88 so as soon as you sign up for patreon you get episode 88
Now let's say you'll give you about episode idiot now why would you yeah, yeah, it's just the episode that I was room my life
What I'm going to do by the way no one's been charged none of our number patrons have been charged yet
What I'm going to do is I'm going to post a bonus episode.
Yeah.
You will have access to nobody else.
You will have access to it.
Maybe I'll even write a post about it
if you need to fucking reach it.
So Goddamn badly.
But that's happening very quickly.
Here's someone who wants to talk about Macedon.
W-A-T-B.
W-A-T-B.
Hey, Carl. Now, did you hold man's it on I do like the near man's done to let me it sounds pretty not metal
It's very fucking soft
Not bad, but it's not fucking bloody goddamn thunder am I right or am I right?
All right, so massed down is a band that I'm a fan of I
They've gone through a lot of changes.
They started off as more of like a tech metal kind of band.
They're now more of a songwriting,
style, hardcore metal, whatever genre you want to call it.
I love their old stuff.
I love their new stuff.
Somewhere in the middle I'm not a huge fan of,
but I love their last couple albums. I think they're fantastic. And the the middle, I'm not a huge fan of, but I love their last couple of albums.
I think they're fantastic.
And the problem is, and I've talked to other friends
who are fans of Massadon, and they go,
well, it's just not Massadon.
I'm saying, well, no, no, they're evolving.
It's really good.
Just don't say why I want it to be this.
All right, what am I talking about?
What the fuck am I even talking about?
Here's, oh, we have another female listener.
What?
And I have proof right here.
Hey Carl, this is Casey.
Your other potentially female potentially female.
I'm talking about the leggings you have on your shop.
No one's gonna pay $37.
It's her pair of leggings with a garbage can
where I have fun.
Oh, where else?
Speak for yourself, Casey.
No one's gonna buy those leggings
because if you put a one-star review on the butt of that.
Oh, really?
Anyway, if Vic lives in North Florida
I want to be friend, Teller, she dang out with me.
Hey, now.
Call your ass.
Casey and Vic send pictures.
Yes, please.
All right. I don't think the world is ready for you to hang out. Just saying. I do.
Yes, we have not sold any of our WHP liking. Shocking. I don't know what's going on. I'm
going to talk to the product department. I think it's head up by Jen. So you want the
Jen for the product department. Those bicycle shorts sound like hotcakes though. They do.
It's because I was the one who modeled them on my website
Here's the last thing that I want to play and
It's actually a voicemail from the city of Gary Indiana
Hey there Carl. This is the city of Gary and the Anna column music entire goddamn city
And I just want to let you know the last count
We never had a neck bearded stay at home dad track across across my ass. It looks like a
Shameless characters lined the other pal in other
Indian of state news. We are officially changing the state bar snack to Jeremiah stator top
On a late great car over.
We have to do it.
We have to do it.
That's a deep poll.
Good lord.
Thank you, Gary, Indiana, for calling again.
The fuck planted in my eye.
Holy shit.
Is this weird?
Yeah.
He's getting weirder.
I can't tell if the drugs were especially good today
or if it's just that kind of show
But rain man come on. Yo, motherfucker. Let's fuck this bitch