Wolf and Owl - S3 Ep 60: Busy Tom & Big Sprouts

Episode Date: November 15, 2024

Apologies for the delay but this week’s episode is finally here - better late than never! We’re talking… late arrivals, Tom’s very busy week, tech troubles and more AirPod woes, sleeping with ...Batman, the greatness of Colin Farrell, Internet speed tests, robot restaurants in South Korea, the top 5 sprout-exporting countries, blockbuster films, the Goonies legacy, meeting Tim Dillon in NYC, working out new stand-up material and Tom’s return to Buckingham Palace. For questions or comments, please email us at wolfowlpod@gmail.com - we’d love to hear from you. Instagram - @wolfowlpod TikTok - @wolfowlpodcast YouTube - www.youtube.com/WolfandOwlPodcast Merch & Mailing List - https://wolfandowlpod.com A Mighty Ranga Production For sales and sponsorship enquiries: HELLO@KEEPITLIGHTMEDIA.COM Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Interior Chinatown is an all new series based on the bestselling novel by Charles Yu about a struggling Asian actor who gets a bigger part than he expected when he witnesses a crime in Chinatown. Streaming November 19th only on Disney Plus. Pair your peppermint mocha with a cozy game night. Sip your chestnut praline latte at a holiday movie marathon. Or take your caramel brulee latte along on your impromptu catch up. These are sips worth sharing, so come together and find your holiday magic. Only at Starbucks. Yo, what you want? Beak or jaws? Feathers or fur? Sharp teeth or feet with claws? Whatever's preferred? They'll grant you all ass requests to steady your nerves Then podcast the body parts, get severed and served Bring your weak shit, wear the wool finaula That ain't just a mistake, that's an awful howler
Starting point is 00:00:57 Both of them are known to pull up at your shows Have the crowd witnessing the murder like they rolled in with a gang of crows Fuck their censorship, let them see the whole thing. They stay dressed to kill, never sheep's clothing. Dark enough to turn the sun to the moon, you'll see nothing. All you hear is a huff and puff and a whee. Expect killings, red spilling and flesh ripping. Impressive, innit?
Starting point is 00:01:16 The death bringing its head spinning. Just kidding, every word in this song's about two grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog. Hello and well, look, let's start things off with apologies. Yeah, Tom is massively busy. Well, you are such a rogue. I look for sure at the bus. Tom is, when you're busy, I'm always like that we couldn't do it.
Starting point is 00:01:42 We couldn't do this. And you're like, yeah, yeah, it'd be tough. That's both. You've literally gone in the go back. It's a 42 coming. Don't worry about getting in. I'll get you under the top. No, no, no. I'm no, I'm listening.
Starting point is 00:01:53 You're you're listen. My brother, my kiss, my kid. I doth protest. You judge. You judge me wrong. What I'm trying to do. Oh, I actually adore this. This is slithered into the book.
Starting point is 00:02:05 It's awesome. I slithered up. Please split the real time. All I'm doing is I am looking at a friend of mine, now your brother, and I am thinking about his, his brand, people's perception. And I want people to know my guy, Tom Davis, is booked.
Starting point is 00:02:23 It's been a sparse couple of months in the Davis household. I've been eating Gracious Nester. Reception and I want people to know my guy Tom Davis is booked Davis household, I've been eating gracious leftovers. Yeah, I mean you You've got you've gone from I'm getting out of this game till I fucking love this game You're like Patrice Evera on a break I find Apple products, and I've said this before, I mean, I'm not even, by the way, can I say thank you to everyone that has come up to me in different facilities of my life and mentioned the AirPods. I sort of feel like it's, I'm giving up the hunt now. That's it, sort of done. Best case scenario, I'm getting them back, but this guy's been wearing them now for a month. Yeah Oh, I'm worried. It's a lot of it. He works bill builder. I'm kind of still a let the ghost go
Starting point is 00:03:10 Yeah, maybe I would say it'll be a cold Could I suggest that that ship has sailed in terms of letting it go? I mean it's youth we've talked to you consecutive yeah It's obviously bothered you. Yeah, I mean it's massively massively bombing. So I've been I've been a grand theft. It was in my life. But I can ask you can ask you a question. I hate to bring people into the technical side of this. But where your zoom says audio,
Starting point is 00:03:35 yeah, can you just click on the up arrow and tell me what it says for microphone? What? Honestly, I swear. Right? Is that bad bad there you go oh my god Wow fuck Apple like every why does that not come on no one wants a beats like microphone it's like it's literally Is I've got a stupid update Apple IDs into the top right hand corner I can't get rid of now, unless I update it. I don't even know what my password is for Apple. That's another problem. Because as soon as apparently I change my password back to something I know from my Apple devices, right, that's the end of me in the AirPods.
Starting point is 00:04:18 I've just got to let the AirPods go. The AirPods are actually genuinely a hindrance. And I've bought so many people with this AirPods story. People I've not even known people I've bumped into. Like I've said to someone on the train, I would add the air pods. Good. I miss my mate and a pair back in 23, early 24 up until about a month ago. I loved air pods. I'll never buy them again. Now had that person spoken to you first, you just went up to somebody with a pair of airports and said, no, I sort of made a joke about it.
Starting point is 00:04:47 You know, by the way, also, uh also Andy Joshua has kicked off a craze there's a lot of people who walk around with just the one ear pod in there right you see that well Anthony Joshua I sort of looked into this because like I saw a load of press conferences where he was he had the one ear pod in while he was being interviewed and I think it might be he didn't put this label on it but I think it might be an anxiety coping thing where like he has some something reassuring playing in his ear so that when he's in like high pressure situations I mean arguably you'd want one for the fight if that's helping you yeah but he when he's into going into situation he doesn't feel comfortable
Starting point is 00:05:22 just having something like that is he finds finds it reassuring. I relate to it. You know, like I am when I'm away. I'm so, so I could have one for a gig. Yeah. When I'm away, as I said to you, like when I go to bed, because I feel, not, I wouldn't say I'm described as anxiety because I feel, I don't enjoy being away from being away from home. I have to have something on that is something that I listen to. Well I put on I'll either put on like a podcast or more often than not I actually
Starting point is 00:05:52 have like Netflix play like the office or something like that just because I'm so familiar with it. It's you know I go with the dark I go with the dark night right that makes sense it's very that's very reassuring for a lot of people actually sort of guys parents are shot and then he ends up sort of going into really dark place I just find that I find that going to sleep that's the one person that if I could have one person sit on the end of my bed and know that I'm gonna get a good night's sleep it would be Christian Bales Yeah. Just go to sleep, relax. Go to sleep, relax, you can do it. The night is coming.
Starting point is 00:06:28 The night is coming. Allow it to embrace you and take yourself into sweet slumber. Close your eyes. Forget about the anxieties of the day. Forget about them. Sleep. That'll be my way. You need rest.
Starting point is 00:06:43 I think I've talked about this. One of the first bits of standup I ever wrote was about Christian Bale's Batman voice. Sleep! That'll be my way. You need rest. I think I've talked about this. One of the first bits of stand-up I ever wrote was about Christian Bale's Batman voice in those films. Really? It's like, yeah. It's so, so funny, man. I just always think of, I think about this about Be Real from Cyprus Hill as well, you know that? I'm not going out like that. Like, that is such an iconic rap style.
Starting point is 00:07:06 This is how far you in front of you are of me in a stand up game. Why? I'm still trying to work in voices like that into my routine where you're like, you're onto sort of like the deep shit, you're into the really fucking, you're into deep water now.
Starting point is 00:07:18 You're like- What are you talking about? Cause you're going, like when I watch your stand up, you've got like a relevant edge, right, to your stuff. I don't know if that's true. I think anyway. I think you, well, whenever I watch you, I think you've got an ability to pick up stuff that is quite nuanced and fuck about with it. Whereas I feel really terrified to do stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:07:39 Well, you know, I would say one of the biggest enemies of creativity, Tom, is fear. And what I would take this opportunity to say to you is that you are one of the most naturally talented in the game. And what you should do is embrace that talent and allow it to shine. And don't let fear of failure hold you back. I do live most of my life in terror. I have a lot of terror. As all of us good-minded people do, I the truth the truth of the matter is is that you know? Fear is I think fear is what stops you doing most things do you mean like you know whenever whenever you watch like an acting performance or
Starting point is 00:08:18 Some music that's like game-changing or you know I'm talking specifically about creativity But you know it could be in, in any kind of walk of life. Whenever you see somebody that does something amazing, there is an element of fearlessness in that. Do you know what I mean? Like, you know, everybody talks about- Can I say about somebody who's- Gone. Somebody who's done something amazing. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:37 You watched The Penguin yet? No, but I was at a gig last night and this is all that anyone was talking about. Colin Farrell, take your hat off, sir, here's some change because you own acting now. I'll actually say Colin Farrell is, I think he's had the best action in the world right now. Yeah, yeah, okay listen, I've not seen Penguin and I've heard it's amazing and I don't doubt that he's incredible in that but what I would say just in case Colin Farrell is listening, I think some of, you know, you saying he's the greatest actor in the world right now is partly influenced by the fact you've just watched The Penguin, if you don't mind me saying.
Starting point is 00:09:11 No, no, no, no, but I'm afraid he's out there as an actor, right? And his last three to four performances are so different in there. Like, go and watch Banshee's up against Penguin, go and watch, you know, what's the show he just did for Apple when he's a private steward, that's incredible. The level of his performances and the way that Colin Farrell can, the empathy that he portrays as an actor
Starting point is 00:09:36 and the things that he can bring into, even with something like The Penguin, I watch him in absolute awe, like genuinely, and to think of like from brew in brewshes on just the stuff even like things like SWAT which is essentially an action movie he's fucking incredible he's just got something that's incredible he's just incredibly gifted I think as an actor. Yes look shout out to Colin Farrell although I don't think he's I don't think people are going up to go and
Starting point is 00:10:01 listen you're a maskful in the penguin and it's just like just waiting for this wolf on our validation, to be honest with you. Like that is, that's what's really gonna push us over the edge for me. Wolf, yeah, on the Penguin. Yeah, but listen, let me tell you Penguin, you got it. You've got validation from the Wolf.
Starting point is 00:10:14 Although I've not seen the Penguin, but everybody was talking about this last episode. Yeah, I've heard it's like amazing. I've not watched your last episode, but I'm three episodes in. I hope they weren't talking about it in front of you, because that's the dry slap. No, they were very careful actually.
Starting point is 00:10:27 It was Jack Skipper actually, I was gigging with Jack Skipper last night, who had just seen the last episode. Shout out to him. He did incredible work last night, but he was talking about it, and he was saying the last episode is one of the best things he's seen in ages.
Starting point is 00:10:41 So I'm looking forward to watching it. Yeah, I'm in awe of it. Speaking of being in awe, okay I flew back from Korea the other day and yeah How was Korea by the way? We've not spoken at all. No we haven't, no because you've been so busy. How was SK? It was... You're such a snibbler a i'm saying you're a busy guy do you mean it's like it's not nothing to be ashamed of i'm bigging you up so you haven't got any chat you're so pleased with yourself it's got no pants on and you're just literally just enjoying it mate i don't know what you're talking listen i am insulted by this yeah listen let me tell you so there's nothing
Starting point is 00:11:22 Yeah, listen, let me tell you something. There's nothing. I adore this. By the way, can I say, I'm proud of you. You're a wolfing today. You're a wolfing. It's amazing. What WiFi are you on, by the way? Is it my WiFi or yours?
Starting point is 00:11:36 Can I tell you something now? My WiFi is so fast right now. We're in a bit of a delay here, aren't we? Let's sort this out now. We've already sorted out one technical. What speed are you on? Do a speed test right now. It might start into you. Yeah. What's your speed? How do you do a speed test again? Google speed test. This is incredible at the moment. It's my internet connection. Of course it's my internet. I can't wait to get out of this house. Well, what you on what you on was just read How do I do it again? So, okay, so I think I Google Google test my speed
Starting point is 00:12:10 This is this is by the way, just as podcast guy. This is beyond bottom of the barrel stuff now We're actually yeah You actually getting an insight to us fucking working our internet speed connections for this. I mean, this is low This is snakes belly to we're through the by the needle here people the shark is looking up at us going are you gonna jump me? Is it test my net? Test my speed test my speed that's what I googled and it comes up with internet speed test a speed test by oocla you can use that if you want okay got it I've got it all right tell me what you're on and I'll tell you what I'm on
Starting point is 00:12:45 Go for it. It's coming. No, it's connected now. Okay, that's a bad sign that you've not already gone to it, but Yeah, okay JT please keep every second of this in the edit. Oh Man, when that's really what you watch yours 233.1. What's yours? Well, MBPS. Yeah. What's yours? Mine is, oh my god, mine is 38.33 MBPS. Well, it's difficult to know if that's the internet connection or that's just how long it takes you to read that sort of stuff.
Starting point is 00:13:27 But that's actually not bad. Well, here we go. Upload is 28.2. Oh, that's actually all right. I don't know what's going on then. Yeah, something's going on. Anyway, so sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. How was South Korea, my bro?
Starting point is 00:13:42 I'm a big fan. I'm a big fan. I would say that in terms of us eating together as a crew it was slightly tricky because I like the the vegan restaurants are vegan I know that sounds like a bad thing to say what I mean is they're all you either have a solely vegan place or you have a meat place and never the twain shall meet what I mean is it's very difficult to find somewhere. So a couple of times I dropped out at dinner because I didn't want to enforce my veganism on the crew and then
Starting point is 00:14:15 I just ate takeaway in my room like a divorcee. I actually respect you for that, it's a pretty respectful thing to do. Yeah yeah listen it's nice to just eat on your own in your underwear isn't it? But one of the things that happened was we went to this, we went to this, they did eventually, not eventually, that sounds like the crew were amazing, but like at one point we decided to go out for like a vegan dinner and we went to this restaurant and the restaurant had like those robots, do you know the robots that come round and deliver the food for you? Yeah, I mean I've heard of them, I haven't seen them before. Okay.
Starting point is 00:14:44 Have we got those in London yet? We've got them in London. I mean I had them at Centre Park the last time I was there. I mean it's not. What Centre Park? I still get, my mind still gets blown when I go to like, is it ITSU when they have the revolving thing? Yeah I mean the thing is, when you say there are robots serving the food, the image that people have in their heads is that C3PO is rocking around with a tray. But it's basically just like a automated kind of trolley thing and then it sort of comes around to your table. I mean it is impressive but I don't want you to think that like... Can I just say, is someone controlling that? Is someone got a joystick?
Starting point is 00:15:20 Well you're talking to somebody that doesn't know but what I would say is if you had to have somebody controlling them on a joystick, slightly undermines the point of having a robot. Exactly, because one of the best things about a waiter is you get your steps in. Yeah, sure. And then you just wouldn't be sitting there just literally, but you're just sitting there, probably eating. It's not just getting the steps in, Tom.
Starting point is 00:15:38 If you're serving someone like yourself, the scintillating conversation that you're forced into without consent when you arrive at the table. But I suspect what happens is that you're forced into without consent when you arrive at the table but I Suspect what happens is is that you program into the robot where the tables are and Then when you put in the table number it just sort of comes around German and then but it was pretty impressive, but We went to the restaurant a restaurant was full. You can't book at this restaurant. So there's six of us Can we get a table for six?" And she said,
Starting point is 00:16:05 we're full, you've got about 20 minutes. And then she said, hold on, I think we do have a table. This is wild, by the way. So she goes, follow me. We go out of the restaurant, right next door. The family that owned this restaurant also owned like a Tesco Express, the equivalent, like a supermarket. At the back of that that between two shelves. There's a table They sat us there what mate it was like The back of a super market your food out the back mate people are shopping around us Right. It's in between Please don't you film this we didn't it was not not for the show
Starting point is 00:16:43 I mean, I would say it's better than some of the stuff we got on camera. But that was amazing. Yeah. I mean, did anyone like talk to you? Like when any of the customers sort of say anything to you? No, no, everyone's very much. So they ignored you like you weren't even there. Like you were mice scaring you. Reaching across us to get their watsits or whatever.
Starting point is 00:17:03 I mean, it was like, you know, people were sort of, we were sort of in a quiet corner of the thing, but nevertheless it was a nevertheless. Yeah, by like the gluten free stuff. Yeah, like, you know, the without range, you know, as in it was in amongst that. Yeah, yeah. In like South Korea, because you go more travel than that, you know, like when we go to sort of like, waitress or test guys or whatever, they have the. You know, like when we go to sort of like Waitrose or Tesco's or whatever, they have the foreign food aisle, so to speak,
Starting point is 00:17:29 where you'll get like curry paste and you'll get your Thai food and all that. Do they have like an English food in those, like aisle that does like English food? Like stuffing and like soup and stuff? I can't speak universally. What I can tell you is I've never seen that. So I think it's unlikely
Starting point is 00:17:45 that's sad as well isn't it really that's pretty pathetic well one of my favorite things is to go down there I've not traveled enough so sometimes I'll go down to Farnsford food aisle and it feels like a bit of a holiday from the rest of the supermarket yeah it's nice about different fragrances yeah you sort of walk down there and it's sort of the more adventurous shoppers are hovering around there, aren't they? Yeah. Sort of go to them, you're on a little trip yourself, are you?
Starting point is 00:18:10 Yeah. Sometimes I just change it to a pair of sliders to walk down there. But you have like pastes and fragrances and like lemongrass and such. And that's a really exciting thing. You're like, let's try this or let's do this. Let's go crazy. Right?
Starting point is 00:18:25 It'd be nice to think of someone in a foreign country going down that aisle and going, oh my God, like, suet pudding or, I don't know, stuffing or fish and chip batter. It's like, yeah, it's kind of, oh, what are these delicacies? Sprouts? What the heck are sprouts?
Starting point is 00:18:40 Dried sprouts. Yeah, dried? It's sort of- Dried sprouts. Yeah, because obviously they've had to, yeah, I mean, otherwise they'd be the fresh vegetables, right? sprouts yeah dried sprouts yeah dried it's sort of dried sprouts yeah because obviously they've had to yeah I mean otherwise they'd be the fresh vegetables oh yeah kind of mess it's not freeze freeze dried sprouts we we we're the biggest we're the biggest exporters of sprouts globally right cabbage that's how I suppose cabbage is quite big actually when you go to some Eastern
Starting point is 00:19:00 Europe yeah I mean you know cabbage is not exclusive to the UK but what are you what are you basing that on? What the sprout thing? Yeah. I've never had a sprout well I've looked at WorldTrack but I'm pretty sure we're like I'm looking it up now. We're at the forefront of sprout distribution in the world. Okay in 20 the latest information I can get is for 2020 oh 2023. Yeah top Brussels sprouts exports by country. You ready for this? John this really is I mean, it's actually making me nostalgic for the time when we were checking our internet connections, but There's a lot of stuff about what sprouts are Okay, this is about to blow your fucking mind. Okay. Oh
Starting point is 00:19:41 United Kingdom that you thought was number one No, no, don't just start trying to show off the countries, you know the names of so United Kingdom is number 11 11 correct. Fuck you know how far but we fall well I did you say how far that we fall I don't think we're ever up at the top But but here is the top five in reverse order of sprout exports. Okay, just to clarify. Yes You are listening to the wolf for now. Okay, so number five with eight point two million dollars She's actually lower than I thought anyway number five is
Starting point is 00:20:20 Morocco Morocco Wow. Yeah, okay. Yeah, Morocco number four with nine point three million dollars of Sprout exports Belgium well number three With 37 says big jobs a tiny Jeremy. Yeah, it is a big jump by the way in Sprout exports 37.8 million dollars. Yeah, the United States of America Wow, and can we also take this opportunity on the podcast to congratulate Donald Trump on on his victory in the in the latest elections? It's a great time for the sprout. He'll be having 11 on the sprout distribution.
Starting point is 00:20:57 Well, we're only we're only number three in the sprout exports. You need to be number one. I intend to on generating a lot more sprouts, lots of sprouts for everybody. So that's number three. Sleepy Joe has let the sprouts fall. Kamala hates sprouts, hates sprouts. She's probably replacing all the sprouts. That's the film we should write, the sprout game.
Starting point is 00:21:24 Okay, go go go go Number two with another another big jump 74.5 million dollars Netherlands Now number one just have one guess here, okay, she's a German II know This is an absolute shock for me. Okay, what I'm going to say to you is, they are responsible for $106 million of exports, which is 40.6% of all exported Brussels sprouts. Okay? So that's their big in the game. Are you ready for this? Tom? Yeah. It's
Starting point is 00:22:08 Mexico. Wow! That is literally, if you could ask me a thousand countries that would be the last one I'd expect. Well, you know the idea that you... I mean, yeah, I wouldn't ask you for a thousand countries for a number of reasons. But yeah, it's a big surprise, isn't it? At Fizz, you always get more for your money. Terms and conditions for our different programs and policies apply. Details at fizz.ca. Can I just say, why are we not just, instead of, at the moment, we seem so short, we don't know who we are, we don't know what we're doing. Instead of literally like, Stama just turning around, I've had a thought, like, Mexico are fucking leveling up ounces and into economy through sprouts. Sprouts are tiny by the way, right?
Starting point is 00:23:08 We've got so much land here that we could literally be looking at and going, okay, let's just, let's go fucking total to Mexico on sprouts. Do you know something Tom? It's that would by the way boost our economy tenfold. Yeah, do you know what? It's that kind of simplistic, no nonsense thinking that really makes me think you should join the reform party.
Starting point is 00:23:24 You know, this is the kind of problem solving that we're looking for. Yeah, but I do think that's that like bringing money, bringing jobs. Yeah. I think now like how nice it would be if you sort of like you were sitting on a sort of hazy train of an evening heading to sort of like, you know, crawling, you're sort of like whizzing past fields and there's a guy sitting opposite you, his fingers look sort of a little bit blistered and green and you look to go, what do you do friend? And he's like, I'm a sprout farmer. And you'd have a tear in your eye and you'd go, thank you. Thank you. You've turned this country around. Sprout farming could be the thing that literally... Where's he getting the train to?
Starting point is 00:23:59 Well, he's getting, he's going to the sprout farm. Well, he's having a day off. He doesn't work 24 seven. So this sprout farmer, right? He's going to London for the day on a day off and his fingers are green from the sprouts. This guy has not even taken a fucking shower. Is that what you're saying? He's had a shower. No, but when he's like picking and de-shelling the sprouts, he's
Starting point is 00:24:23 like, he's got green on his fingers because he works so, he's so passionate about the sprouts. His little fingers are like blistered because they're constantly. So he's gone, I think he's probably gone up there to get on the big wheel. He's made himself a sprout sandwich. And he sat there and he's like, oh wow, you're rubbish, Nathan, how are you doing? I'm a sprout farmer. Yeah, we used to be, a couple of years ago we were only bringing in about 10 million And he sat there and he's like, oh, yeah. Oh, wow. You're rubbish. We're gonna make it. Hey, how are you doing? All right. Yeah. I was from a farmer.
Starting point is 00:24:45 Yeah. We used to be a couple of years ago. We were only bringing in about 10 million for sprouts. Now we're bringing in an XF. That's 150 million in sprouts. Fucking I didn't know that. I was dumb. It's what you do go back to Crawley.
Starting point is 00:24:55 I've got a sprout allotment in call it. That's what we do. Uh, you know, a sweet sprouts. Okay. Fucking fascinating. I don't know why I'm suddenly brought into this fucking conversation And by the way a lot of what you said about this sprout farm a parent of mine We're talking about a hypothetical sort of imagined person. It's pretty offensive
Starting point is 00:25:14 His fingers are green or all blistered from picking the sprouts he's gone to he's gone to the big smoke Yeah, so he's some sort of bunking twat that's never been to London before. And then he's eating sprout sandwiches while he's there because he can't eat anything else apart from that. No, he's been loads of times. Because he's earning a fortune. He's got a box at Chelsea, man. Right, fine, but you've not said all of that.
Starting point is 00:25:36 You said he's getting the train into London. He's having a go on the big wheel because he's never fucking seen, he's never been at a height before because he's so busy being on the ground on his knees picking sprouts he can only eat sprouts sandwiches because he's out of a fucking Roald Dahl book is mental. Oh, he's sprouts averages because he adores sprouts. Okay, mate, if sprouts are bringing in the sort of money that mean you're
Starting point is 00:25:57 talking about, people gonna fucking sprout farmers will come at every like footballers. This guy you think that that's a bad thing, the green stains on his fingers. He's like the Jude Bellingham of sprouts. You people go, oh, fucking look at Robert Frankenhaven over there. He's in with Clark Thomas, that's the sprout farmer. If you ever had Clark Thomas sprouts, it's fucking amazing. It becomes some point, occasionally it gets to a point where your sort of your argument is like a tsunami of just fucking nonsense and I haven't got time to I've only just got like a tiny dinghy. I can't fucking navigate it. Do you know what I mean? So yes, fair enough. Yeah, all right.
Starting point is 00:26:36 Yeah, good. Nice to meet you, Clark. No, nice to meet you, rubbish. Keep doing that. Yeah, good work. Anyway, so South Korea, what happened on the flight back? We took rest slightly into the world of sprouts. Oh, God. Yeah, Jesus. Actually, if happened on the flight back? We've dugress slightly into the word of sprout. Oh God, yeah, Jesus. Actually, if there's any sprout farmers out there, any sprout farmers out there, this is something we will do on a run-up to this season. If you're in the sprout game, shout us, please get in touch, and we will do whatever we can to start pushing the word of your sprout in.
Starting point is 00:27:00 So yeah, we would love to be, yeah. Yeah, I mean, look, I think it's a Venn diagram between people that are listening to Sprout Farmers who haven't been massively offended by the way that Thomas described you. If you fall into that narrow, narrow overlap, please do get in touch. We'd love to hear from you.
Starting point is 00:27:19 Anyway, I was on the flight from South Korea home and I watched, I watched three movies actually. I watched Dune, One and Two and I watched Oppenheimer and I've got to say three... Well that's a lot of great movies by the way, incredible movies but that's a lot of a lot of watching. Hard-hitting films. Yeah, mate, you know when you watch just... Yeah, but they're like, there's no comedy in there. No, there is no comedy.
Starting point is 00:27:51 Unless you find the Sandworms funny, which they are in a way. But what I would say is, well, each of the Dune films is like almost three hours. The Oppenheimer's like two and a bit, isn't it, or something like that. Yeah. Just, I just was sat there like, obviously I'm at altitude, almost three hours. The Oppenheimer's like two and a bit, isn't it? Or something like that. I just was sat there like, obviously I'm at altitude. So your emotions are heightened when you're in a plane. That is like, it's a known phenomenon. I just was staggered by how brilliant they were. Like it's just amazing. Timothy Chalamet, by the way. Yeah, T. Timothy Chalamet, I know he's a mate of yours,
Starting point is 00:28:26 and Zendaya, just incredible. Do you ever text him and just go, Timothy just watched Dune again? Yeah, I've texted him, but yeah, it tends to sort of, the stream of our sort of relationship seems to sort of be quite, yeah, sort of the stream of our sort of relationship seems to sort of be quite, you know, once a little bit more one sided. I look back to last Christmas, he won't leave me alone. He's so excited about, yeah, he's so excited about the fact that I'm in, I'm in sort of like, I've got a couple of days on a few things. He's, yeah, he's incredible in that. Can you know who else is in sick in that? It's Josh Brolin. Yeah, he's so good, man.
Starting point is 00:29:08 Everyone's so good in that. It's just, it's just, it's fucking Brolin's an absolute dog. It blows my mind. Brolin was in Goonies, right? Yes, he was. Yeah. As one of the uh, was he, he's one of the Santini's, right? No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:29:22 He's one of the, he's the older brother. Is he? Josh Brolin is one of the kids in that right? No, no, no, he's one of the older brother. You see Josh Brolin is one of the kids in that i've got my timeline completely fucked up. He's the older He's the oldest he's the older brother to the kid with asthma He does the amazing speech. Sometimes I listen to that speech. This is their time down here. This is their time Can I just admit something there is their time? It's great. Oh my god. He is the older brother Yeah, you're right. Yeah. Yeah. I can't...
Starting point is 00:29:46 Where are you going to have it? I didn't know he was in the Goonies and I guessed that he was one of the Santini's and then I just got basically unmasked there as a fraud. But by the way, if he was one of the Santini's... I know, I know. He'd be about 70. I know, I know, I know. It was so bad.
Starting point is 00:29:59 I'm so sorry. What can I say to you? I'm embarrassed. Do you know what I think about him a lot in that world is Sloth. The guy who played Sloth has done nothing since, has he? Well, we don't know that, do we? Well, I don't know, but I don't think he has. I looked at his R&DB.
Starting point is 00:30:12 I was watching it. Because they're remaking it. But I was just thinking that that's the part I could start pushing myself for. John Matsuzak. Yeah. Played Sloth in the Goonies. Yeah. Oh, fuck.
Starting point is 00:30:27 What? He died four years later. Yeah, there we go. Did you know that? Three ways, yeah. No, I didn't. No, no, no. I mean, that would explain why he's not gone on to do
Starting point is 00:30:36 anything, wouldn't it? Yeah. Can I say this is another big brother that's just gone early. That's my worry. Yeah. That's big guys. It's, it's, you know, he left such a legacy with that character. But there's some big shoes to literally like that'll be
Starting point is 00:30:51 in the make that that role is going as well. Right. That's there's going to be a slough in the in the new Goonies. I assume so. Yeah, I haven't seen the script. I'd be I'd storm out of the cinema. And I'd actually write a barrage of emails and letters if there's Sloth isn't in the Guyanese second film. It'd be disgusting. It'd be like literally like doing Narnia and leaving out Aslan. It'd be like oh what's happened to Aslan? Oh we just didn't bother putting him in it. Like Sloth is, Sloth is the, he's everything in that movie. He's, do you know what he is in, what his role is in that is acceptance of people that are different. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:26 He looks the way he does, but you know what? He's actually got the kindness of hearts and the truest of spirits. Yeah. Okay. Do you know, do you follow Corey Feldman? Yeah, I do. Do you know that he's, he's been supporting Limp Bizkit on tour? Right. Have you, have you watched any of his performances? I think I've seen some, I mean, I Corey Feldman, Rabbit Hole, not so long ago.
Starting point is 00:31:49 It's an incredible phenomenon where Corey Feldman is like, his music is, I don't want to be offensive here because I respect anybody who puts themselves out there. But it's sort of, sort of bad. And so, yeah, and so people have kind of been watching as, you know, like they've been kind of ironically enjoying it. But now I think he's in on the joke. I think that's the impression I get that he sort of knows that, I think his wife's on keys and he sort of does these it did a song called
Starting point is 00:32:26 You need to watch it if any people are listening to intrigued by this. It's well worth looking up Corey Feldman's music It's good Yeah, yeah, it's good he just gave up the game that right I said we do music I don't think yeah I mean, he's been he's troubled. Well, he's doing music. I don't think he did. Yeah, I mean, he's been, he's troubled, isn't he? He's had his issues. And so listen, I fair play to him for having a career still. Have you seen Tim Dillon talking about the Joker movie, by the way, we were talking about? No. Have you seen the interview that he does with Jury?
Starting point is 00:33:00 Us, me and you have both done a lot of press for shows and stuff that we've been in over the years, right? I've never seen anyone talk about a project they're in like Tim Dillon does about The Joker 2. Why? What's he saying? He just says how shit it is. He's on the press trail for it. It's insane. I don't know if it's a bit of the publicity because obviously it's gone quite viral, but it's bad literally lays here. He goes to fit in on the it's one of the I love to do He's hilarious, but yeah, it's one of the funniest things I've ever watched you. It's just worth. Yeah, I Had an amazing experience with Tim Dillon because what what you mean? Yeah, so I did
Starting point is 00:33:41 Yeah, why didn't I did I think he's incredible meeting is maybe a bit of an exaggeration, but this is like I, well, I did meet him, but it wasn't like we stopped and had a chat or anything particularly, but I did Gotham Comedy Club in New York. Right. So obviously it's a British comic. Nobody like, it's just a bit of a weird, a weird... It's a weird experience going and gigging in America as a British comic. Like, if you're not like Ricky Gervais or Jack Whitehall or somebody that's got a lot of profile out there, do you know what I mean? Like, I'm sort of turning up as a relative unknown. And...
Starting point is 00:34:19 So, none of the other comics really know who I am, which is fine, obviously. I'm not expecting them to. But I went on before Tim Dillon, right? So it was a bit embarrassing actually, because they're much more strict in the US than the UK about timing. Well, if you do too long, it really is, it doesn't matter how well you did,
Starting point is 00:34:41 it's a bit of a fuck up, do you know what I mean? Because they have so many apps on and so you're, you you're being a bit kind of selfish if you overrun. So anyway, you can get where this is going. I did overrun slightly because I couldn't see the light. Like not metaphorically. It's awful if someone's standing in the way. Yeah. I just basically was sort of in the back
Starting point is 00:35:02 and she did, they did warn me. They said to me like It's slightly tricky to see and she's can you see it now and I could sort of but I didn't want to say no What they are, you know, if I say no, they look and they do Jimmy They can't read change they can't change the light. How long were you doing? If you don't mind me asking I think it's like 15 or something like that. So so I went up his time today, I went up and did my set and then I saw the comp hair kind of he wasn't I won't name him but let's just say he wasn't happy that
Starting point is 00:35:31 I hadn't seen the light. He was like signaling to me in a manner that I describe as front-footed that I'd done my time. So I came off and he was like, like he was a bit of grief. I would say he's a bit of grief. But what I would say in his defense is it's annoying if somebody overruns. He doesn't know that I've not seen the light. All he's seen is like some British guy's fucking taking too much. I get it. Probably own in the room by the way if I know you. Well I don't know. It was fine. You're very good at what you do.
Starting point is 00:36:04 Anyway I walk off. You're not all going all the way to New York and fucking, you're going in there and you're fucking packing up and you're smashing out, right? I mean. It sounds disgusting the way you phrased it, but. I was just going there to do a few, I was there doing a few gigs, right? So I come off stage, Tim Dillon's on next.
Starting point is 00:36:21 And he went like this, I'm gonna do it for you visually, just want this that was great that was great now and I nearly I mean it's just a mad thing isn't it like because obviously I'm a fan so then well yeah you know incredible yeah but I mean you know it's possibly says that to everybody after they come you know I don't think Tim Dylan does by the way I think if there's one person I'd give you any insurance if you if you fucking bombed who would tell or he would just can I say by the way that the idea that stand-ups when you bomb and fucking sensitive creatures is a fucking unless it's a mate is in my experience starting out or fucking gigging if you bomb is no one's
Starting point is 00:37:01 going oh mate it'll be better next time people look at you like it's something they might catch. Oh, what are the comics? Other comics, it's awful. It's not like a sort of sense of, oh, what happens to us all? They might say that like a week later or two weeks later, but in the very moment, if you bomb on stage, there's not really a feeling, like it's like, oh shit, this guy's got the bomb disease
Starting point is 00:37:22 and fucking you come walking off and they're like, oh God, like stay away a little bit. Mm. Like I have seen that. It's a horrible thing. I have seen that. Yeah. Um, and Tim Dylan, like from what I know, and I love him, would strike me as someone who wouldn't just go, Oh, you've done great if you hadn't stretched it.
Starting point is 00:37:35 Uh, well, thanks very much. It sort of, sort of accidentally turns a story where I look like I'm really bigging myself up there. But speaking of bombing, not to say bombing, but I am at, and you're slightly further ahead in your processing me, but I've started thinking about next tour. And when I say started thinking about, I'm way off going on tour, like I'm way off even the tour getting announced,
Starting point is 00:37:56 but I've just basically like in the same way that you go to the gym or whatever, I'm trying to start working, I'm doing my warmups. Do you know what I mean? I'm starting to like stretch the legs and sort of get into it so yeah last night I did I gigged with Kyra Grey and Jack Skipper who are both excellent it was like a Romish and Friends night in Crawley. Up and coming, it's very good. Yeah excellent both excellent anyway so I it's so exciting and horrible to be at
Starting point is 00:38:22 the stage where we're at now we talked talked about it on text last night, which is basically, I was on stage for a total of 50 minutes last night because I did like 20, 25 before each of them. And, um, but I've got nothing. It's an, it's an incredible place to be where you go, I have got a few ideas that I've scratched out or I've got fucking nothing. And the only rule I'm giving myself is that I can't say anything from the last tour right now that is I'm not doing any material from the tour because there is no point in that do you mean like so I'm just going to say stuff that I've thought of
Starting point is 00:38:56 recently you know ideas the very beginning of ideas it is I have done it so many times now right it? It is fucking disgusting. It is, it's like going on, it's honestly, the best way I can explain it for people that don't do stand up, and sorry if like, this is too like in as a conversation. It's like going, oh, I'm gonna take all my clothes off and just walk up there naked actually, if that's all right.
Starting point is 00:39:22 It's fucking horrible. When you're talking, you're in the middle of working out an idea and not only did the audience not know if you've got anything funny in this, you don't know. Right? You haven't got- But also, you know the bit that like in what I was saying earlier, that the hardest bit of that, right, is actually I find your peers. Yeah. Like certain people I think are like, there's people who are like fine with, like who understand the process think are like, there's people who are like, who understand the process, right. And, and there's almost probably a little bit of a privilege to that in our point of like, people who are sort of like who've toured and once you know, when I was, but yeah, whatever, weren't much, your first tour. You're at a stage where you've got to kill every gig just to keep going, do you know what I mean? And to keep yourself earning, whatever. But so there's a
Starting point is 00:40:11 privilege that we have to the fact that we can go, oh, we're just going to throw this out and try new stuff. So, you know, I'm constantly aware of that. But when you go out and try new stuff, and it dies on its ass, and you're with people who look at you in a way of like, like what the fuck I thought this person was, but how does this person got to where they got if that's the stuff. And you know what I think with my, and you said this to me and I never really computed it
Starting point is 00:40:36 enough, there was so much stuff in my first tour when I look back at it and go, oh fuck I wish I'd delved into that a bit more. I wish I'd pushed that a bit more. And you said to me like you've got, when I was doing my work in progress is you were very like, you've got to push stuff and you've got to, because once you get into the tour, that's it kind of thing. You obviously change bits, but the place to die is in your work in progress. But I was so conscious of trying to rip the fucking work in progress is I was not examining the process
Starting point is 00:41:02 enough and going, oh, I need to change this so I can delve into this a bit more. So whenever I go, yeah, now when I watch back my stand-up, I'm like, that first tour and the first special, I'm like, oh, fuck, I wish I'd just, like, I found stuff later on after we'd filmed it. I'd even now think, I thought that, but I never said it. So now I'm kind of trying to go out there and go, if this bit goes on for 10, 15 minutes
Starting point is 00:41:24 and there's six minutes okay or four minutes or two minutes then and that make it but I need like you said to me before I'm more proud that I'm doing that now I've digging it a bit and just going okay digging into it but it's fucking it's brutal and it is also the most grounding thing that you can yeah yeah I would say that you know one of the things it's difficult it's not difficult is this job is fucking amazing and we're like blessed to do it right I mean let me put that out there I'm not saying that we're not working down the mines. But what I would say is what is this route for? Exactly. Yeah,
Starting point is 00:42:07 green fingered and blistered. Packing our sprouts in into a lunchbox so that we can go and see the big smoke for the only time. But I what's difficult is, there's part of me that thinks like last night, I was really busking, I had like some ideas and I'm like, some of it worked, some of it didn't. A lot of it didn't, you know, like you'll, or you feel like it's got legs but you haven't found them. Do you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:42:32 Whatever you have, you want to describe it. But I am, there's part of you that has to resist the fear that the audience are gonna be disappointed. You know, like, there's a fear that people are gonna leave that room thinking that you're not as good as they thought you were when they walked in. Right. And then there's the other fear that the other comics are going to be shit. And the, sorry, the other comics are going to think you're shit. Right. And the way that I sort of try and reconcile that personally is, um, I've come out for the night, right. I've, I've, I've come out for the night, right? I've like, I've come out to work and I could do stuff
Starting point is 00:43:08 from like, I could do old material and have like a good gig. Do you know what I mean? But that is a waste of time. Do you know what I mean? It is essentially a waste of time because obviously I'm gonna try my hardest to make this entertaining. But if I go out and do stuff and occasionally, look,
Starting point is 00:43:22 the truth is if you've really had a fucking stinker, have to throw in some stuff to make them feel like otherwise that you're not doing what it says on the packet, right? but like but for most part you're trying to work out so because I've been at new material gigs where the act before me is absolutely fucking ripped it and I'm looking at my notebook and This the page is going there's nothing there for you man Like you like good luck because you thought this is good when you're writing this at home, but it ain't. And there's part of it that goes off,
Starting point is 00:43:49 do I just do stuff that I know is gonna work? But then you're wasting your evening out. That's exactly the advice you gave to me. I've got a bit, right, that I've been working at for, like, there's that bit I talked to you about that James Gill did, which I look at and go, if I just dug a little deeper into that yeah instead I just went with quite an easy joke no you didn't no you didn't
Starting point is 00:44:10 no no no but I could have delved in and I didn't but there's a bit I've been trying to work out for two years right took longer than that maybe three four yeah it's since I've literally since I've come back I've been like this there's something here, and I won't go into it now. Sorry, is this the bit you're talking about, that you think racism's cool? Is that the? Yes, yes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and it's not coming across,
Starting point is 00:44:37 because it's like no one, it sort of gets a standard ovation. Yeah, but not in the right way. It's a bit that, it's ridiculous and it's silly and it's a bit surreal, but it's like, I, but you can't, me and you both know, because we're, I guess seasoned enough in a sense, you kind of, you can write it down in any,
Starting point is 00:44:57 and I've written it down in so many different ways. And I constantly go on stage and I'm doing okay with new stuff or I'm doing a bit of old stuff. And I go, you know what, I did a gig the other week in Islington, it was great, really nice group of people and I was like, oh, you know what? In the back of my mind I'm like, I might just now, I seem to be doing okay,
Starting point is 00:45:15 I might go into this bit. And as soon as I start it, my confidence goes. And it's crazy. I have so much light and I'm like, oh, this, and now I think in the last five gigs turn around got halfway through the setup and gone do you know what let's just fucking let's not do this bit because this bit's just shit it's so but I do think there's something there in the thing that I'm thinking and like yeah maybe we'll talk about it over a bit. Yeah you're very good at it. Yeah
Starting point is 00:45:43 it's really difficult but at the same time I, I find it like the sort of the most exciting part of the whole process because it's so like the whole time because like, listen, the crowds we did two shows last night and both times I was like searching, searching, searching, where's the funny in this? Where's the funny in this? And the crowds were great. It felt like, I felt anxiety. I was like midway through being on stage, I was like, oh God, oh God, I feel sick. Like I can't, you know, that is so good for you.
Starting point is 00:46:16 It's so good for you to feel like that. I just feel like it's so exciting to go, fuck, I'd like, you know, this could, I could fucking eat shit here for the entire time. I don't want to. It feels horrible every time it happens. But that feeling, I think is part of what makes stand-up so exciting, man. That's what makes creativity exciting. What makes the people work? If you're, if you're, if you try saying a bit different, it's like, if you've got that, the confidence to do confidence to do that.
Starting point is 00:46:50 Yeah. It is like you want someone you go, oh shit, that's the when I'm watching stand ups I really enjoy. Oh, yeah, I was, I didn't think I was with King of Bridges the other week. Yeah. I'm watching him. It's like an education. Like genuinely, it's like, okay, he's so fucking, he's so confident in pushing his material. So like, just like you, he's trying to fish something out. He's trying to like, when you,
Starting point is 00:47:15 like I remember when me and you both started, when we were in this point last time, we were both gearing up for our tours. And we did that gig in, is it, was it, where were we? We were in, Oh, was it Pleasance? Was it called?
Starting point is 00:47:27 The Pleasance. Yeah, yeah. And I literally, I did about, I think I did 25 minutes and just was, it was, yeah, now I'm just having like cramps in my body because it was so bad. It wasn't. And you just went out, no, but you went out and you tried stuff and even when it wasn't working,
Starting point is 00:47:43 that was where I was like, oh, okay, this is how this is what the process is. Because you were like, Okay, that's shit. That's not working. There is something here. And you were saying that on stage. And it was so refreshing. Because I was I was like, Oh, that's not working. And instead of making a joke of it, I was just like, Who thinks who thinks bottomless branches are funny? But then you know, that's that's that's the key right you gotta go Yeah, it's fucking yeah, can I say by the way that confidence thing like, you know It's a very surreal thing, but I was invited. I went to Buckingham Palace yesterday Oh, yeah, sorry God bloody hell bloody hell. Sorry. What the fuck? So this is a lot of the by the way, this is what I mean when I say booked and busy Tom Davis was invited to Buckingham Palace
Starting point is 00:48:31 Not for the first time. This is a return visit. They liked it so much. They got the guy back So tell me all about it by the way So before you before you tell this story, can I just say, I'm so proud of you, man. It's such a great thing. And like when I saw that photo of you and like the little you did a little sort of X Factor style caption where you said, you know, from the... No, no, but look, I will say this, right. And I felt very lucky writing that.
Starting point is 00:49:04 But I was talking to someone yesterday and I spoke to someone like this week, I was I've been shooting a new filming a new thing and very exciting we can't say what it is but very exciting but one of them guys could be the end of the podcast could be the end of the podcast my shadow video my people people are people in the movie like the fucking podcast it's quite insane um anyway it's like I try like it was quite there was a lot of stuff you know in your mind when you're doing something like that and I had this I always have this and it's like I try like it was quite there was a lot of stuff in your mind when you're doing something like that. And I had this I always have this and it's like if you said we're very lucky what we do and I'm very conscious of where my background is and stuff that you said to me about what would be the odds of getting to this point that you're at from where I started out. So when you're on set and you're looking at someone the scaffold, the rigging scaffolding and you're like, fuck, that's not that long.
Starting point is 00:49:43 someone, the scaffold, the rigging scaffolding, and you're like, fuck, that's not that long. You know, so when I was there, I'm like, and I'm talking about some, but I had, I could do the scaffolding, we did the scaffolding on Buckingham Palace many, many, many moons ago. But when like, and I know you feel this, so when I get there, and that picture, you know, Jim took a picture, I then get into the bucket. Like, do you have that thing where, because you couldn't bring a plus one, so you have to turn up on your own. And I felt very much on my own for quite the beginning of the time there is very much like, all right, okay, I spoke to a lovely young man
Starting point is 00:50:14 called Jake, shout out Jake, and he does amazing charity work. But when I'm standing there looking around, do you know some people, even though they're on their own, they're never on their own, the smoozing is incredible to watch. You know, it's an art to the smooths. Like somebody like you watch, you can, you can,
Starting point is 00:50:29 like I've got a good vantage point of six, seven. So I'm looking at the room and people watching. Yeah. And watching some people work a room and how they go from like the top left corner to the bottom right, back up and round and seem to chat and shake hands with everyone with absolute undying confidence. Like everyone in the room has just been waiting to see them. And it's like, and this is by the way, I'm not at all having a go at this because I'm watching it in almost awe thinking that's an incredible thing to
Starting point is 00:50:56 do. Do you know what I mean? It's like pretty amazing to have that sort of confidence within yourself just to bowl about. I stood there, I bumped into people that me and you both know, or people sort of like, I was very much like I was at any school disco or any night pub in my fucking late teens. I stood in here to the room watching a dance floor ride with fun and what's not. But it was a- You weren't holding the bags this time.
Starting point is 00:51:21 You just like in and out. No, no, but I think, yeah, I mean there there was a cloakroom there, but I think if any one person would have been given a bag to hold it, it wouldn't be me. I had to hold someone's sandwich at one point. Yeah. But I mean, look, I, I, I, um, I was taking the piss out of your caption, but I shared it because I think it's an amazing thing, man. You got like, you got, it's just like, it's just like an incredible thing. Like outside of your wildest expectations, you get invited back to Buckingham Palace,
Starting point is 00:51:49 do you know what I mean? So you weren't even phased by the turnout you left in there the first time you were there. They invited you back. Can I just say by the way, the toilet paper at the palace was incredible. Yeah, and did they have someone in the toilet all times to wipe for you or do you do that yourself?
Starting point is 00:52:04 No, no, no, they have someone standing outside the toilet, right? But I had to go I had so much anxiety I'm so nervous. I don't know. I've had a shit bucket of palace. That's there. No, yeah. Yeah No, I wouldn't say by the way, I'm being I'm being very it wasn't it was a very yeah It was a lot more wind than than right or fucking hell or snow. Oh fucking hell Tom. But I was very anxious. Yeah okay all right all right. Yeah yeah. By the way is this a weird thing to do? Like I always think it's funny to because I was conscious there was someone standing outside the toilet door as you walk in like a bugger or whatever. Yeah by the way just to be clear because I've actually been to
Starting point is 00:52:41 Buckingham Palace once to do that 500 words competition and the toilets that you use, you know, you're not sitting on Charlie's throne, do you know what I mean? It's like there's other toilets. They're the tradesmen. I don't think anything that you touch or anything like, yeah. They're not coming into contact with anything you're coming into contact with really. It's like I complimented them on the spread that they put on. I was aware that Camilla wasn't the person fucking cooking them on my shorts. She's not put the cheese and pineapple on those sticks. No, she's not fucking spent four hours in one of Chicago town pizzas. She's not gone to the staff. Does this look like a hedgehog?
Starting point is 00:53:20 But I go in there and I sort of, I know I've got going there for I know I know the detail in Yeah, I know the mission and there's a person there but also I'm conscious as I go in the person says hello sir, and I'm like um I Said I'm going in I might be some time and just sort of laugh Oh, no, but I didn't want them to feel awkward about me right like yeah And then they sort of gave me a bit of a look and then I, you know, went in. Oh God, I tell these stories. There's a way of telling the story without any of this detail. I mean, can I just say the wind and rain thing is one of the worst things I think I've heard you say. And we've been doing this for a while now. And now for some reason, off the back
Starting point is 00:54:03 of that, like somebody that can't read the room properly, you've decided to then go into more detail. So go on. Yeah. So, so I go in and I'm going in, I might be some time, the person sort of smiles and sort of like nods it sort of, you know, cause they're paid to do that, I guess. I go to the toilet, um, and it was a lot quicker than I thought. So as I come back out, I just sort of laugh. I went, yeah, record time sort of thing, and make a joke. To which then they just sort of look and sort of nod
Starting point is 00:54:32 as if to say, look, fuck off, I don't have to do. The worst part of this job is idiots like you talking to me. And then as I'm walking down from the toilets to sort of go to the stairs. A very sweet person comes running up behind me and says, Oh, do you know that your your suit jacket tucked into the back of your trousers?
Starting point is 00:54:55 It was so dignifying. Yeah, it was nice. So by the way, very nice. So thank you. Yeah, it looks a lot better when I had a look. Yeah, yeah, it looked a lot better when I had, oh look. You're getting it there. Look at that. Little G. What are you standing on? What are you trying to do?
Starting point is 00:55:11 What are you, what? I love you, five minutes. Look at this kid. That is. Yeah, she's found a little step to stand on. I love little G, but it is like something out of a horror film that. She comes into the bedroom at the moment and she'll just smack you in the face at like three in the morning and go daddy I need a wig. She's using the toilet now, it's pretty amazing. Oh congrats man.
Starting point is 00:55:37 It's an incredible thing. Well look I just wanted to say well done but can I just say just to put this into context right right? There are alternative worlds, and I know alternate worlds or alternate sets of circumstances where you and I would have not gone on to do what we're doing. You could have still been a scaffolder or whatever you were doing, I could still be a teacher. That would still be great. Like if you'd have stayed as a scaffolder,
Starting point is 00:56:02 you'd still be the wonderful, incredible genius mind that you are now. It's just that, you know, we've gone different paths. But what I wanna say, the point I'm trying to make is, it's amazing, like, you know, it's like, I feel very lucky to do what we do. But equally, you know, there's nothing,
Starting point is 00:56:20 if I'd have been a teacher still, that still would have been great, do you know what I mean? Like, it's not like- I've gotta say, if I was still laboring on a building site at 45 it would be pretty bleak okay at least you had a trade okay okay well listen Tomo it's it's been a hell of a ride and by hell of a ride I mean sort of meandering laid a shit but as you well that's what we've been put together for the last year that is what we do okay let's let's do the thing open dreams hmm smiles and schemes yo it's
Starting point is 00:56:58 easy to think of the plot in which you picked in the land of which you stand it's not being quite as good as your next door neighbor or a friend who lives across the street or someone's house that you fly over on a long haul. You look down and think, Christ, that looks good. It's easier to plant your feet down and complain. The soil beneath them feels too wet, nearly too dry. God, this is sandy. I don't like sand. It's always easy to look up at those who have and wish that you had a little scent more. But how about looking sideways down? You have a plot of land, not everyone does. So that's a pretty amazing thing just to be getting on with. Very easy, especially around this time of year, to look around and
Starting point is 00:57:45 feel an animosity to people who are doing very well for themselves. Spare a thought for those who aren't. I think it's very, very important in life to put your hand down, maybe try and pull someone up, put an arm around someone and say, yo friend, you got this. The waves of jealousy are turbulent, but the waves of kindness could be a calm storm that wash all over those humanity and make each and every one of us something very special. Be good, be kind and enjoy the calm water friend. Okay. No, that was I had another one in my head, but that
Starting point is 00:58:24 I often find if you've got something in your head head it's worth just freestyling something else. Completely different. I think if you've been thinking of saying something the whole of this and then you change it at the very last minute, what you get is the absolute... You'll forget the bit, that's how you create the first part. Oh shit, I've just fucking spat. Do you know what actually, in a sense I think what I've just said is in keeping with the rest of the podcast today Yeah No, I thought it was great. I thought it was great. And I listen I'm gonna say I want to say to you Just before I choose a song Genuinely, I'm so so fucking proud of you man
Starting point is 00:58:58 Like it's so so great like not just Buckingham Palace But like the work that you're doing at the moment people are gonna find that soon it's like incredible I just you're just you're busy do you mean and I love that for you you know you're smashing it speaking of people are smashing it friend of the podcast and also very close person a friend of mine friction has put out a song I just think it's absolutely incredible it's called bang bang. It is amazing. I love it So shout out to friction for doing great work. So JT could you play us out with that? animal pack
Starting point is 00:59:35 Thank you so much for listening looking forward to seeing you at Ali Pali by the way Those of you that are coming, please do send an email and if you're gonna be there We'd love your problems to because we're going to do a little problem section as we normally. Well, actually, we haven't done maybe a fancy dress. Yes, fancy dress. Yeah. Christmas themed would be great. Yeah. Are we going to go fancy dress? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Cool. What are you thinking? Well, I'm going to go Santa Claus. Okay. Well, I was going to go Santa Claus. So shall I go as an elf? Oh, that'd be so good. Let me pick your outfit. No, I'm gonna go Santa Claus. Okay, well I was gonna go Santa Claus. Shall I go him as an elf? Oh, that'd be so good.
Starting point is 01:00:06 Can you let me pick your outfit? No, I'm gonna come as an elf. Let's just leave it at that. I'll pick my outfit, thank you. I don't want some fucking green batty riders that have got a rock on their thing. Alright guys, thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next time.
Starting point is 01:00:20 Much love. Boom! love. If you have a problem, opinion, feedback or anything at all, please email us at wolfalpod.gmail.com. That's wolfalpod.gmail.com. We'd love to hear from you, mainly because we don't have any content ideas. Thank you.

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