100% Eat - Colonel Sanders Shot a Guy? %% KFC Saucy Nuggets
Episode Date: August 20, 2024After a false start (check out this Friday's Michael, Jordan Podcast for more,) Our Heroes get into the long and short of KFC's newest sauce covered offering: the Saucy Nuggets. Why is everyone doing ...specifically this food right now? Anyway there's a whole thing with a fan and keys and Nick eating like 38 wings as a Personal Record that you'll see. We think the bigger question is can anyone stop The Stewart and what are you being for Halloween? Support us directly https://www.patreon.com/100percenteat where you can join the discord with other 100 Percenters, stay up to date on everything, and get The Michael, Jordan Podcast every Friday. Follow us on IG & Twitter: @100percenteat Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Need a great reason to get up in the morning?
Well, what about two?
Right now get a small organic Fairtrade coffee and a tasty bacon and egg or breakfast sandwich
for only $5 at A&W's in Ontario.
Welcome to 100% Eat Again, the show where we try every fast food restaurant to let you
know if you need it you probably do I'm your host Michael Jones recording the 100% podcast official alongside my co-host Jordan swears Jordan
How are you? I want to make that too official at the top you never know
I know now squeeze out another pod like a different podcast out of you think so I think I think is weird
There's some so we could end up talking about another restaurant
It's weird. There's some silly. We could end up talking about another restaurant.
They still in next week's episode right now.
You know, I'm going to cut straight to the point.
Grackles, you really want to check out the Michael Jordan podcast this week.
Normally we record it right after the podcast.
Things got a little weird today.
This one halfway through the beginning of the podcast became that podcast.
And that's what you get.
I live in. I live in the now.
And it just seemed like the appropriate
thing to do. We were not, it went around the world. Peak efficiency, I would say. So we
were doing the podcast, this podcast or so we thought. It was weird. And then we got
about 15 minutes in and Michael went, this could just be the Michael Jordan podcast.
And me and Jordan both went, no, no, no, no.
You fool, absolutely no way.
And then about 22 minutes in, Jordan went,
I think this should be the Michael Jordan podcast.
Michael kind of, he pitched it again.
I was like, you know what?
I think I got eight minutes of bullshit left in us.
And then in about 26 minutes, I went,
this should be the Michael Jordan podcast, and
so it became.
It is-
Wait, much like Kamalo, we're chameleons.
We can be anything whenever we want to be.
They kept saying it was 100%-y, and then all of a sudden they decided it's Michael Jordan
podcast.
Decide now it's Michael Jordan.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what happened. You're weird. I
Have I'm not talking about me. They're talking about him. I have
I have two chameleon podcasts myself. So I know what this is like right? Yeah, this is normal
I hate my chameleon podcasts
Yeah, this is normal. I hate my chameleon podcasts
Today right now that in real what we're doing for real reviewing KFC saucy nuggets Oh, Nick has cleaned through the nugget. There's okay. Hang on. Wait. Okay. Here's Korean barbecue
Why did he pause pleased
Because he had to make sure it wasn't honey barbecue. There's one more honey
Because he had to make sure it wasn't honey barbecue. There's one more honey s-
How many are left? Like, not many, right?
There's one left for honey sriracha.
There's a bunch of honey barbecue.
How many you got over there?
Okay, so there's like ten left. There were sixty.
I think there's probably-
I had six.
I had eight.
I had probably eight or nine.
So, then the rest went away.
You could toss honey barbecue in some of the other flavors.
Also, also, motherfucker, as always, because he can't help himself,
after the podcast we thought was this podcast, he goes,
I think I fucked up.
He's back to eating, I didn't even think about it.
And you go, I ate too much.
And then he immediately started eating again.
You're going to eat all of these, for sure.
Do you eat because you're hungry or because you're bored?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's fine.
So am I.
He's watching this Gracie style.
Yeah.
I wish I had something to munch on.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Don't worry.
There's more.
You could toss these honey barbecue ones
in some of the other flavors.
That's a really good idea and he will do it.
I do expect you to finish these in the next 55 minutes.
How many left?
There's gotta be seven or eight.
Oh, that's so many.
In 55 minutes, you said four minutes ago you were fucked and then you started eating them.
There's six left.
Yeah, there's like only six left.
That'd be crazy if you didn't eat them.
And you'd hit your PD.
He wants them now. I said 55 minutes and he said, give me'd be crazy if you didn't eat them. And you'd hit your PD. He wants them now.
I said 55 minutes and he said, give me now.
No, I gotta mix them.
He's gotta mix them.
Man, we really need the camera on him.
I know.
We gotta figure it out.
We would buy it.
Yeah, we gotta figure it out.
We don't even have a desk or anything.
He's just on like a non-cum-filled chair in a corner.
For now. For now.
I think he's about to sit down on his knees, turn around, and use the chair as a table.
I don't think he's going to do that.
Okay.
Why are you showing this to me?
Oh, you're recording it.
Look at this.
Oh, God.
Look at this man.
He's got slime.
You just have a bucket of slime.
You can't wait to eat it.
It's so oily looking.
It doesn't even look like sauce. It looks like olive oil.
Here, why don't you wash it down with some of this piss lightning?
This piss that he just brought back.
We did KFC saucy nuggets and there's six different flavors.
Just throwing that out there.
So he's cycling through and there's remnants of sauce in every little tub
And so now he's mixing and matching different kind of tossing them different to Wendy's
There were actually six there were actually six if they didn't just like recycle some of them
Yeah, spicy. I mean some of them are spicy and some worse us already. I don't know yeah, yeah, but I can put this up exclusive
Exclusively on your video on twitch. Yeah, what do you mean? That's it. That's going up on patreon
It's it's Nick concerned, but eating nothing will stop him. He's full. How much of the hot sauce did you have?
Dude you can add it to the honey barbecue and maybe a thousand yards dude. I don't even need to tell him he's like
We're all the same wavelength. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Pickles B, Pickles B.
Saucy nuggets, saucy nuggets, saucy nuggets, saucy nuggets.
Why is everyone doing saucy nuggets?
I was gonna say the nugget wars have begun.
It's epidemic, dude.
It is, yeah.
Yeah, forget COVID.
Because we did it, we did Wendy's,
and then we did- Burger? I think that's what happened. We did Wendy's, worked out. What was the other it we did Wendy's and then we did
Burger, I think that's no we did what was what was the other out? Yeah, we did another saucy. No Wendy's always the trendsetter
Wendy's and us what was the other thing that we do it was some like C tier. Yeah
Bullshit. Yeah, what a burger. Oh, it was what a burger
Is that different than the other ones we had? I think so. I think we had We had Whataburger. I think Popeyes actually started this.
Well, no, we did Whataburger and Popeyes at the same time.
Yeah, yeah.
And Popeyes were good and remain the best.
Popeyes really.
And then I think Wendy put Whataburger in place,
not because Whataburger was bad.
Whataburger was exactly what we thought it was going to be.
Yes. Popeyes was fucking good.
Yeah, yeah. Those were great. Popeyes was fucking good. Yeah.
Yeah.
Those were great.
Popeyes were like, I want more of these.
Popeyes were like, we're actually going to make.
Yeah, we make good chicken.
And we will make good wings.
Yeah.
And they were good.
And everyone we've had after that.
Though I have not been the Wendy's ones were fucking weird.
They were weird. Yeah, they were like whack.
And then also there were so many different flavors at the Wendy's.
Less than they thought. Hmm. No
Well, this one was six this one was six and that's indisputable. Yes, uh-huh and
When we went to milk just get out of your nose
And when we went he's he's mixed it all and he's doing it. It's hot lighting piss. Yeah. Oh no.
He hated it.
He mixed a bunch of shit.
He mixed all the hot sauce in it.
You gotta finish it though.
Ah, he's doing it clean.
Nick, was that a bad idea?
You gotta finish that though.
Mix it with some more.
Yeah, maybe if you mix something else in it.
Yeah, yeah, you need a different flavor.
Did you try the garlic?
Try the Chipotle ranch in there.
Yeah.
Yeah, honestly.
Come on, next to it.
He went, mm.
Yeah.
Just do it.
He wants the mango one. Yeah, there you go.
Anyway, check back in later.
So they have six flavors.
And when I went to order them, I apologize to the woman
at the counter.
Becoming ruining her day.
She's like, oh, for here to go.
And I went to go.
And I need a 10 piece of each of the new flavors that you have but there's six of them
Why is the smallest amount you can get ten ten is the only thing that they offer and I went this is way too
Many and then Nick showed up
It was like
And then he just freezes. It was like...
It's weird that it's ten.
They're only about six bucks each.
Our grand total with four drinks
and sixty wings?
Do you know or did you ask?
Could you mix and match or no?
No, I don't think you can.
I'm not sure, but I don't think you can because
I think what they do is they deep fry them,
count them off in ten, put them in the bucket,
and then shake them in the little.
Right, I feel like you could do all those steps,
and then before you get to the shaking part,
put them in two different ones.
And then you could get five.
I guess I didn't ask, no.
Because it's just the way it goes.
It's gonna be easier to just ask for 10 of the.
Aside, like a normal person might be like,
I wanna try a couple.
And 10's an investment.
10's a lot.
That's 20 is too many.
I guess I can only try two flavors.
Yeah, and if you can only commit to a couple of them,
you're stuck, you could choose the two worst ones,
which there are two bad ones.
There are two worst ones there.
Uh-oh, spaghetti-o.
Nick ate them all, but there are two worst ones.
Nick ate them all and made a couple new ones
Nick tried to do what the Colonel couldn't do and make some new flavors
Sir Sir valiantly mule tender Sanders
man, uh, I mean Tim Walves over here that
That fucking idiot only served 24 measly years.
Made it to the highest rank you can.
What a fucking loser. Me? I? Don't ask me about that.
The KFC that we went to is the KFC where the van broke down.
It is the KFC that is the weirdest, nicest inside.
Is that still on the lot? No. Is that still on the lot?
No.
Is that still on the lot?
Where do you guys have that?
How many fucking people ask that?
Where's the van?
For years.
Oh, really?
For years.
Oh, yeah.
I think the van is still there.
It never, it was left there.
How are you still asking this two years later?
Oh, we're doing a thing for whatever face you have?
Oh, can we use the van as like a prop?
We don't have it.
We're talking about, what do you not understand?
We're talking about people specifically that we work with,
not necessarily you the listener.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
this is people like, oh, we're doing the thing,
we can use it in the shoot.
We don't have it.
We don't, there's no van.
It's been gone.
It's gone.
I know it's like, haha, that's funny you left it there.
Yeah, we did, yes.
Yeah, we had to tow it out there and we left it.
Yeah, that wasn't a joke. It was a funny reality. It's gone. Do you think there's still a chance though? We could get it back
Oh probably. Oh, definitely. But at least we should start looking. Hey voodoo ranger if you're watching this, which we know you are
What's up, you want to ship that back to us? Well, let's go get it. Yeah, let us go get it
We'll come get it Eric can move it by himself.
Like a fridge.
Yeah.
Go check out the Michael Jordan podcast
for more information.
It's gonna be a good week of content.
God damn.
The punkers board happened in the other show.
I know, sea pinions?
Sea pinions?
Oh, you guys got any sea pinions?
That happened in the other show.
As a kid, I thought KFC was like decent chicken.
Like it's fast food chicken, but it's pretty good.
And then as an adult, anytime I get it, which is rare,
but I'd be like, I haven't had KFC in a while.
And I go, this isn't good.
No, it's not good.
Every other chicken place is better.
Yeah.
The last time I had it, not for the show, was,
they released their like, I think it was like a Beyond Chicken.
Oh that's right yeah yeah yeah like a vegan thing right yeah um and my wife was like give it a try
it I was like yeah I'm on board um I remember liking KFC and uh I don't think we ever like had
just like chicken meals on the show we always had their weird shit I was like I'll go back.
chicken meals on the show. We always had their weird shit.
I was like, I'll go back.
A classic bucket.
Yeah, just a classic bucket.
I got some, we got some of the vegan chicken
and I was like, just for like, you know,
nostalgia sake, I'm gonna get some chicken too.
Sure.
Family bucket style.
They were both bad.
Yeah.
The vegan ones were so greasy.
Oh really?
And then...
Like Nick Sausage? Dude, it looked like that. It was were so greasy. Oh really and then like Nick sauces
Dude, it looked like that. It was like oozing. Oh
and then the Just the regular chicken was just like I remember being better. Yeah, I don't know if it got worse or just like I got better
I don't know right. Yeah, but like I'm sure it got worse, but also I mean it probably is never that good
I think the easiest comparison of
Super popular chicken places
that are everywhere to me is Popeyes.
As a kid, it's like, eh, it doesn't matter.
As an adult, Popeyes, it's way better.
It's way better.
Head and shoulders above.
There was no one on my radar.
KFC to me now, Pizza Hut.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's like, this sucks.
This sucks.
When I was a kid, we would go camping and everything a lot.
We would get like a bucket of chicken.
And then you throw in plastic bags and everything
and had like a camper with like a fridge.
And then that's what you kind of like eat
through the weekend.
It's like, oh, I'm kind of hungry.
I'm going to grab like a drumstick or whatever.
So my memory of eating KFC is-
Tied to nature.
Is like never eating it hot.
It's always eating it cold and going like,
this skin sucks, this chicken sucks, all of this sucks.
So when I think of KFC, it's never very good.
You know what I kind of miss?
And this was a much bigger staple in my family,
El Pollo Loco.
Oh yeah, big time.
There's no El Pollo Locos out here, are there?
No.
You-
That stuff would be, it wasn't fried.
No, it was like- It was, it wasn't fried. No.
It was like, it was like.
Like grilled chicken more.
It's like a Mexican style.
It's like a Mexican style kind of fare or whatever.
Really like spiced heavily or whatever.
When I was in college and had no money,
I would get the BRC burrito,
which was the bean rice and cheese burrito,
and just eat it in my car on a break at work and it would just be enough
to like fill you up and get you through
like the rest of your shift is fucking great.
And you could get like whole chicken.
Oh yeah.
You could just get some chicken legs
and they always threw in tortillas.
Those tortillas would be so good with some butter.
You could just get the butter and just like,
cause they were always warm
and like it was really close to our house.
So like it was still really like so hot when they got home
and just get a stick of butter and like.
But also don't listen to us because
Gracie just had Del Taco and we told her what to get and she just went uh I'm
gonna not do that and also the sucks yeah but I did tell her I would recommend
not getting it yeah I mean we both said we were pretty we were both pretty clear
about like I have a lot of nostalgia wrapped up in Del Taco don't get it your first time was out of the blue one night like 10 p.m
Because she was in California and she goes is Del Taco good. Uh-huh. It was me and Jordan good. Well, yeah
Yes, I was like no no, but but if you were to give me a taco and some of their fries
I need it. Oh, I yeah absolutely. Their fries are surprisingly good.
That might be the only place that I really have nostalgia for, though, is like Del Taco.
Yeah, I can see that.
Not really KFC.
I don't know if this, what your sea opinions are on this, but even when I was a foolish child and liked KFC,
I always thought their mashed potatoes fucking sucked.
And people love them.
I don't know if it's just like people that don't eat mashed potatoes.
Like I grew up, mashed potatoes I probably had for dinner five, five nights a week.
Yeah.
Like whatever my mother was making, we always had mashed potatoes.
And they're like super buttery and garlicky.
And that's why I have a very, I have a very, uh, they were made.
Yeah, they were made good.
Um, and so it's like anytime. I had mashed potatoes at KFC. It was very like processed shit
Yeah, yeah, and it always blew in my people
You know what's weird too?
What's weird about what's weird about their fucking tomatoes? They're terrible what's strange about their mashed potatoes specifically is that I think they get worse with the
Gravy yeah, I agree
I don't like I don't like that gravy at all straight-up sucks my wife loves the man right my head around it
I don't get it. They're macaroni and cheese is fucking terrible to yes. Yes. Yes, it like it's like
Elementary school. Yeah, that's the first place. I could go to where they had mac and cheese
Whoa fast food mac and cheese and it's like you kind of like just tricked yourself into thinking it was
Whoa, fast food mac and cheese and it's like you kind of like just tricked yourself into thinking I thought about back in the news. I'm just going you just might not eat mashed potatoes
It's fucking terrible by my brother worked there when we were in high school and he was vegetarian
So I would go on my break at Target to go get his free meal across the street at KFC nice
So it was like it's like that worked. That's great. He's like, yeah get a three-piece. I'm gonna shit you just ring it up
It's like that worked. That's great. He's like yeah get a three-piece. I'm gonna shit. You just bring it up
That rock dude just another way Kyle's the same. That's thanks Kyle truly way to go Yeah, once he getting on the show. Yeah, we both got like laid off at the same time, too
Yeah, he's in Colorado still yeah, man, he's doing alright. He's good Mary. He needs a job
Yeah, you want to see if he wants to be on this show?
Could help to move the fridge.
Right?
Come on in, Kyle, you'll fit later, of course.
Go check out the Michael Jackson podcast.
Be here at nine or 11, or 11.30.
Yeah.
Be ready to move it up, if need be.
Either way, whatever time you get here,
it's wrong and it will not show up.
Yeah, and it doesn't.
Yeah.
Ultimately, it doesn't matter.
Also, fuck you.
Oh, okay.
Thanks.
Right on.
Cool.
Well, this is why you should be like all for this because he could just serve as a buffer
for all this bullshit.
Easy.
You just put Kyle in front of it.
Cool.
Have him absorb it.
Yeah, that's what will happen.
He'll just absorb it.
He won't turn around and just give it.
I think he would refract it.
Yeah.
Instead of the sun hitting Eric and it's hot,
it's now a focused laser beam that's just immediately incinerating.
It's like with Gracie being on...
It's not a beautiful rainbow, it's a deaf laser.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's like with Gracie being on,
you think it's going to take some of the heat away from Nick, but it doesn't happen. She just spins him up and then everything's right like weird and worse. Yeah, she shows up
Wines the little switch on the back of them and let some gum but she's by ends a switch hits the detonate button
Wherever you're going you better believe American Express will be right there with you.
Heading for adventure? We'll help you breeze through security.
Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit.
Squeezing every drop out of the last day? How about a 4 p.m. late checkout?
Just need a nice place to settle in? Enjoy your room upgrade.
Wherever you go, we'll go together. That's the powerful backing of American Express.
Visit amex.ca slash yamx.
Benefits vary by card, terms apply.
Do you guys wanna learn about Kentucky Fried Chicken?
Yeah, oh, okay.
AKA KFC?
I like learning.
Okay.
Our last KFC episode as Face Jam,
this is, or Michael Jordan podcast,
this is 100% eat.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Was March 14th, 2023, where we ate the Double Down period.
We ate the Double Down.
It received an average rating of 52.5.
It had come back.
Yeah, yeah.
Do you remember having it?
Cause I don't think you had had it and then we ate it.
I think I remember eating it.
We were in that like side room.
Yeah.
That's about it. What were in that like side room. Yeah. I don't know, that's about it.
What was it?
The Double Down?
Yeah.
It's the two pieces of chicken.
Okay.
That are like, that's like the sandwich.
Like there's no bread.
I remember that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, one of those stupid,
why do I, I don't want to hold this.
Yes.
That was the original, for me, dumb food.
Yes.
Because it came out when we were like teenagers.
Yeah.
It was, it's the original like,
let's put the goopy sloppy shit on the outside
Are you touch it and I hate that I remember eating it in my backyard with my friend Frank
It was cold and our friend Aaron and no it was hot. He was hot. He was camping
It was hot and it was great
And then we ate it and my friend Aaron was working on like yo Gabba Gabba and stuff and then she ate like the whole
Thing and she just kept going
It was like Nick eating these things, but she was actually sick and not pretending. Right. Yeah. So, right.
She wasn't like, he was like, oh, I fucked up and then she fucked up and then stopped.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. What's that like?
She sounds what's what's the word?
Uh, normal. Yes. Same. That's it. Yeah. Mm hmm. Next fact.
All right. Colonel Sanders got in a gunfight with a rival gas station owner Matt Stewart after the after the Stewart
Was found painting over Sanders's sign the shootout left one employee dead from quote being shot multiple times
That'll do it. Stewart was wounded when Sanders shot him in the shoulder Stewart was in prison for 18 years for murder
What the fuck? I'd never heard this story.
As of a month ago, it's everywhere.
How is this never come up?
How is this the third episode we've done?
I have no idea.
Were they zombies?
I've never heard this story before.
And then a month ago, it started showing up everywhere
and like all these articles and listicles
and all this bullshit.
And then he fucked a couch.
Yeah, I can't believe the Stuart would do that.
That's maybe a typo.
The Stuart. So Colonel Sanders was visiting believe the store would do that. That's maybe a typo. That's too hard.
So Colonel Sanders was visiting friends at a gas station
that they owned.
I think also partially owned.
And this guy was painting over their signs.
Because like, hey, it's Colonel Sanders, whatever.
And then he was painting over it.
And Colonel Sanders said.
Passed down a sentence of death.
Yeah, he said, if I catch you doing this again,
like, we're going gonna have a problem.
So they caught him doing it again. I'm a colonel and they all drew. I'm a mule tender and they all
drew down and started shooting at each other. And that guy killed someone again, shot, multi died
from being shot multiple times. The musket. Imagine you're in a gunfight on the side of Colonel Sanders and you're just like,
this is incredible.
Follow him in the battle.
I can't believe I'm here with a real Colonel.
And then he goes, uh, yeah, sure.
How about you go up first?
Why is he yelling charge and only I'm?
Yeah, cover me. Why is he yelling charge and only I'm right? Yeah
Cover me. Uh-huh. And then Colonel Sanders shot this guy in the shoulder and then it all
Sanders got nothing for shooting him 18 years for murder. Huh? It's pretty light. It's light
I think this was probably not even 30s. His defense was he started it. Yeah. Yeah, pretty much don't paint over my goddamn signs
was he started it yeah yeah pretty much don't paint over my goddamn signs that is that's that's insane that's why Popeye's always kept its distance yeah
yeah trouble mm-hmm yeah just like he was like Ken Watanabe in Godzilla let
them fight
anywho KFC Singapore is releasing a quote KFC porridge blanket to promote their new breakfast in bed menu that includes the KFC twister
chicken scrambled eggs tomato cheddar and mayonnaise
wrapped in a tortilla
And porridge
So if you're in Singapore grab some KFC gruel then get caned when you leave
You spit your slop on the ground because it's KFC at like 10 a.m.
You freak you can quit your job at razor. No one will be mad
You get came came for spinning that's razor headquarters
Could you imagine eating KFC porridge?
I can't imagine eating porridge!
Who eats porridge in 2024?
Is this also a story from the 1800s featuring Colonel Sanders?
Colonel Sanders started shooting people.
By porridge.
Colonel Sanders laid down the porridge and then he just started blasting.
Also, chicken scrambled.
Just right.
Finger lick this.
Finger clicking good.
This is good. These are good punch ups.
Okay.
This is good.
Uh, yeah. Do you guys want chicken scrambled eggs?
That sounds-
Okay. Also, chicken and eggs together.
A little weird to me.
That's how I feel.
It's a personal thing.
Tomatoes. Okay.
Described simply as cheddar, not cheese, cheddar.
Big ol' block.
And mayonnaise.
Yeah.
Wrapped in a tortilla.
Yeah, mayonnaise and eggs.
If they call it a-
I don't like mayonnaise ever.
I understand it goes on chicken.
I don't like it on chicken, but in eggs?
Yeah, I don't know.
What the fuck? I don't know it on chicken, but in eggs. Yeah, I don't know. What the fuck?
I don't know why put the mayonnaise in there and then you get you get done with all that because that's in
Parentheses and porridge. Yes
Pour it tell me about the porridge the the porridge is in it the poor. Yes, there's God. I was joking
There's cut up pieces of KFC chicken
Like they're like this. I was joking. There's cut up pieces of KFC chicken Like they're like the words left over in the bowl
Come on all that goo and then I made it like scallions and something else and you're just like this is
Like KFC breakfast is fucked up. That sounds fucked up. Does it have the 11 herbs and spices in it?
Yuck that guy who got shot multiple times
He's down he should care Colonel Sanders walking towards the guy he's on the ground white pepper
black pepper
Like a dirty hairy thing I bet you're wondering how many herbs and spices
Shoot ten or eleven
That's fucking good
Also thinking you feel spicy punk. I'm thinking of like a that's good. I'm thinking of like a blade type scenario where they're like
Ultraviolet bullets or something like he's's like, he's just got all his different ammunition.
And he's like, I got pepper, I got salt.
Just every bullet's packed with different powder.
It mixes in with the gunpowder for different vampires.
So you can taste me when you die.
There you go.
Pfft.
Ugh, I'm coughing up blood.
I'm coughing up blood.
It's pretty good.
Yeah.
You should open a restaurant.
Yeah.
My friends all dead and delicious. Next fact. Just a week ago a woman in Twickenham, England
I'm sure that's how that's pronounced.
It's probably like, it's probably just twig.
Yeah, no England.
Was disgusted to find a deep fried whole chicken head in their box of KFC hot wings.
Was disgusted to find a deep fried whole chicken head in their box of KFC hot wings.
Was disgusted to find a deep fried whole chicken head in their box of KFC hot wings.
With eyes wide open,
With eyes wide open,
With eyes wide open, With eyes wide open, It's probably just twig. Yeah, knowing some bullshit Was disgusted to find a deep-fried whole chicken head in their box of KFC hot wings
With eyes and beaks still attached and encased in batter a photo of the head was posted
Along with a two-star review that said I found a fried chicken head in my hot wings meal
Put me off the rest of my meal erg
KFC responded by inviting the customer and her family
into the restaurant to see how the preparation was done.
None of this makes any fucking sense.
Two stars?
Why would you want to go to KFC?
What the fuck is going on in England?
That's immediately when I started laughing.
Chicken head, two stars.
It's pretty good.
The rest of the meal was good.
Good upgrade.
Put me off the rest of my meal
Oh is such a British. Yeah, it's just like
Can't say I was quite appetized after that it's convenient. I ate around the beak as much as possible
Let me see if I can find the picture of the chicken. I don't want to see it. No alright. That's probably fair
Yeah, it is a whole chicken head. It is fucking deep-fried
probably fair. It is a whole chicken head. It is fucking deep fried. Two stars!
Two stars!
I feel like that's a one star or that's a five star.
Yeah.
Okay.
I don't know how you get two stars.
And also, two stars, mashed potatoes are pretty good.
I knew it was going to be the mashed potatoes.
Don't fuck!
They're better in England.
Yeah.
Why is there a solution to come to the restaurant and show them we don't put chicken we don't put chicken heads
Must not have gotten it. Yeah, I
Didn't have I stars. I apologize. That's my fault. I'll be deleting my review now. Yeah, what I would also not agree to that
No, just be like I'm never going back
You imagine if one of us if that happened to one of us,
and they went, no, come tour our facility?
Well, I mean, we would definitely go.
The podcast would.
I'm talking about as like a fan, like, imagine your kid is
like, dad, there's a deep fried chicken head here.
And then you went, I can't believe this.
And then KFC went, bring your family
and look at how this is done.
But, but what if they went there and they're like no right there right there
See look they're putting the chicken heads in then KFC's like
Dude my bad honestly chicken scrambled eggs tomatoes cheddar
And porridge yeah
and the final fact
and porridge.
And the final fact,
can't have one without it, a class-action lawsuit has been brought forward against the state of Alabama by
incarcerated workers who are used as forced labor in fast-food restaurants such as McDonald's and KFC. The lawsuit states,
a labor trafficking fee equivalent to 40% of the gross earnings paid by the private employers for the forced labor."
What does that mean?
I don't know, Jordan.
Keep going.
And, end quote,
and the Department of Corrections system of deductions meant workers paid Alabama's $7.25
minimum wage earned as little as $2.06 per hour.
That's what that means.
So come on down to an Alabama KFC where they've got the spirit of the South still riding strong.
Convict leasing
is the closest thing to slavery they can still get away with. Maybe we should reduce a couple
of states to ash and just start over. Could you imagine? There was a woman that they
interviewed and she said, I've been doing this for 15 years. Oh my God. I've been in prison and this
is the only way that I can see my family. I get paid $2.06 because they're scraping off the top of my hourly minimum wage.
Exactly.
$5 off $7 ain't a scrape.
What they're giving me is all a scrape.
They're digging it up.
Well, that's the way that Alabama Department of Corrections, which is just a, they're privately
owned companies, are just going, oh, and these convicts, they're just, they're taking the money off us.
That two fucking dollars we have to pay them.
Oh, I don't, do you think that they have to wear
the work uniform on top of like the orange jumpsuit or what?
No, I think they get the work uniform
and then it's custom.
Like there's some stripes on it.
You get like, so it's like orange,
but then it's got like a McDonald's yellow stripe. It says like Kentucky fried some stripes on it. You get like so it's like orange, but then it's got like a
McDonald's yellow stripe.
It says like Kentucky Fried Convict.
That's how you can tell.
That's what the seats stands for.
That's why they dropped the acronym and just made it like the letters.
Yeah, blends better.
Yeah. Yeah.
This was a thing that they introduced in like the early
1900s, and then they mostly stopped doing around the time of like the New Deal.
And then you'll never believe when it came back 1980s to bring back this convict leasing
around Reagan era in the south really crazy really nuts. American dream man. Yeah. Yeah.
But essentially the class action lawsuit is brought against the state saying that they are
incarcerating people. Essentially, they're benefited by incarcerating more to put them in
this obviously this leasing program. And then they finally filed a class action lawsuit and the
governor went, no, no idea of KFC breaking into someone's home
and framing a person for murder
so they can pay them $2.
You thought the cops were dirty?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I didn't do it, I swear.
Yes, you did, go to work.
That's where, I think that's where Sneak,
make some chicken heads.
That's where Sneak King comes from.
It was just what he was doing in Alabama.
And they went, we gotta throw him off the trail.
Put it in a video game
That should work
Fucking I can't believe that convict leasing is a real thing in like
Burger King is one of the restaurants also McDonald's and McDonald's Burger King KFC You put that in fact so in a but I know it in like the 1930s
You know you probably you read 1984 and you go, that's pretty crazy.
Uh-huh.
And then somebody else could come up with a wacky idea like corporations are incentivized to incarcerate mass populations so that like cheaper labor can, can like maximize their profits and somebody be like, that's fucking stupid.
That's insane.
That'll never happen. Yeah, uh-huh anyway
Anyway all the time anyway. Here's your six-piece chicken head. I'm innocent
Come to our facilities where prisoners don't put chicken heads
You go to McDonald's, and you see if there's no tomato yeah
Doing this for 15 years fucking crazy. Do you know lawyer? We're trying to do a class-action. I'll see you know a lawyer
This is Alabama. I don't know lawyer when you're big mac like God's always a mess in the lettuce
I can't fucking read
I can't fucking read
That's why they do it in Alabama
Smart smart is all make sense. What a fucking shitty state bottom tier bottom five state. Yeah
Yeah, I lived right next door to it for three years and
It was a mess. Yeah, no, it's just a punchline over and over. That in Mississippi.
Those are the facts.
And all the people there will tell you yes.
Yeah, absolutely.
They'll all agree with you.
Do you feel like you learned a lot about KFC?
Yeah, I'm wondering why you were holding out
on the shootout for years.
Me too, I can't believe. For years.
When I found that fact, I couldn't write it up fast enough,
and that's why it says The Stewart.
It was just I put more, he put it in and that's why it says the Stewart. It was just like, who's writing the extra words?
The Stewart has done this!
I can't believe the Stewart would do this.
Convict the Stewart!
I learned a lot about our prison industrial complex.
Yeah, absolutely.
I knew you'd like that fact.
That was a Jordan fact.
I don't have Jordan written all over it.
But speaking of things Jordan written all over it, how about we learn about the food? The KFC saucy nuggets, the new Chipotle ranch, quote, a mildly spicy
and smoky blend of Chipotle peppers and creamy ranch. Nick, end quote. Best one. Nick says
best one. Okay. Wow. I'll withhold my., absolutely all the end well these are good. I like Nick pinions here
Yeah, okay, just chime on in hey. How do you think what do you think about new mango habanero?
Well, tell us about it first. Yeah, tell me yeah
It's a sweet and spicy mashup of fruity mango. Why is this part in quotes? I don't know the whole thing
Wait, hey and I kept reading
wait until you get to the next one
a sweet and spicy quote
mash up a fruity mango fiery habanero peppers
and other savory flavors
yeah Nick what do you think of the
mango habanero? good, spicy
why wasn't the sweet and spicy in quotes?
isn't each one of these a quote in its entirety?
but hang on
let's get to the next one. Here's new honey garlic.
The quote.
Classic taste of honey and garlic
combined with a kick of heat for a
blast of flavor. End of quote.
Yeah, you like that one?
Okay. Okay, these ones aren't
new. No. This is Korean barbecue.
Quote.
A sweet and savory umami sauce with soy sauce, garlic, No, this is Korean barbecue. Mm-hmm quote a
Sweet and savory umami sauce with soy sauce garlic sugar and sesame and quote
Okay, Nick likes it good. I think these are all good for Nick Well, I wait till we get to the next one honey barbecue not new quote a sweet smoky and tangy sauce with brown sugar and honey
Rounding out the tanginess of tomato and secret spices no
They might have something else to say and Nick what you think about honey barbecue yeah, Nick did not like that one
What's the one that is not listed here?
Yeah
Oh, honey sriracha. Yeah
Not listed don't know they ran out of quotes. Uh-huh
fucking weird The whole there are six they have five Yeah. Not listed. What the fuck? Don't know. They ran out of quotes. Uh huh.
Fucking weird.
The whole- there are six, they have five listed in their presser? I don't understand it.
Hold on.
Uh huh.
No, there's just a chicken head here.
Yeah.
Sriracha flavored.
Let me show you how we make these. Not these!
Let me show you how we make these. Not these! The Honey Sriracha one was the other one, right?
That was the other, that was the sixth.
Some of these are new, some of these aren't.
They're trying to step up their sauce game thing to keep up with Wendy's and...
Everyone else?
Yeah.
It's a sauce gold rush out there.
It is, it's very weird.
Everyone's scrambling.
It's very weird. Who do you think is next?
Do you think there's one company making all the sauces just bankin'?
Yeah, probably. Like Pfizer style? Yeah.
Yeah. They're just like, you get sauce and you get our sauce.
There's a duopoly. It's Buffalo Wild Wings.
Mmm. Like these all taste like knockoff Buffalo Wild Wings flavor.
They have like trade blockades. Yep.
Sauce has to go through them. These all taste like knockoff Buffalo Wild Wings flavors. They've like trade blockades. Yup. Sauce has to go through them.
These all taste like knockoff Buffalo Wild Wings flavors.
Especially the Korean BBQ, which is the, I think, the weirdest of all of them.
There's no press release.
No.
What?
There were no quotes.
They really did run out of quotes.
Uh-huh.
There were no quotes in the press release.
Huh.
Fucking bizarre.
Nobody has anything to say about how they've innovated on chicken nuggets?
That's why we're here. Mm-hmm.
To let these people know, because honestly, everyone watching this podcast,
they're searching for press releases all the time.
They're going, oh, I gotta know about this new food.
I gotta know if I need it.
Uh-huh.
That's why we're here.
You probably do.
Probably.
Of these, before we get into like our actual review and everything,
which do you think was the best one?
Do you have one that was like, that was was the best one? Do you do you have
one that was like that was probably the best one? Yes. What is it? Chipotle Ranch was the
best one. Do you have no opinion whatsoever on what the best one was? He's thinking he
only had one of each. Only one. Yeah. Did you have one? I'll get into it later.
Did you have one that was the worst one?
Probably, maybe not the worst, but probably the most disappointing, the honey garlic.
Oh, interesting.
Because when I see garlic, I think it's always garlic parmesan.
Yes, and this was not.
Honey garlic's a weird combo.
It is.
Also, there's honey in
Two of them. Yeah, Sriracha honey, too
Yeah, so there's honey in three of them the honey levels wildly different
Yes, some is like all right. I can kind of taste the honey and some some is like
The honey Sriracha one was it was just like holy shit the honey shit
I'd be the honey garlic
The honey garlic is so bizarre because it says the classic taste of honey and garlic combined
Classic I've never had that before in my life that before ever. I think somebody got like maybe something got lost in translation or something
I just don't know why it's not a garlic parmesan like everyone else right because all of these are so just a bet
They're mostly so sweet again if only the chief innovation officer of KFC could explain
Stewart killed him oh
Stewart has done this again. No no that's we kill. Oh no they shot multiple times by the Stewart
Yeah, and so they say in his honor. They've never replaced them the wording
bloody suit
Left one employee dead from quote,
being shot multiple times.
That's the way it's described.
Cause of death, being shot multiple times.
Just a bunch of getting shot, dude.
Just a bunch of bullets.
Yeah, so fucking many.
What did you think of the mango habanero?
It tastes like mango.
I'll pay that.
It was a mango explosion at the front.
The other thing I was surprised about is the honey garlic was spicy.
Yeah.
And I don't know why.
No, because even in this it says with a kick of heat.
That confused me.
You know when you combine honey and garlic and it's so, so spicy?
Not a single one of these are listed as spicy or hot.
And none of them particularly were.
The mango habanero had a kick.
Oh, I thought that one was the most spicy.
I ate that one first.
It was like.
I ate the honey garlic first and went,
why is this spicy?
Yes, that was my first reaction.
Yeah.
The honey barbecue one was definitely the worst one,
I think.
It sucked.
It was just their barbecue sauce
and their barbecue sauce sucked shit.
Well, I guess we're just talking about them.
I thought, similar to Michael,
the most disappointing one was the Korean barbecue. Oh yeah. I didn't hate it, but I agree with him just talking about him. I thought similar to Michael the most disappointing one was the Korean barbecue
Oh, yeah, yeah, I I didn't hate it, but I agree with him. It was weird
It was just all of them all of them
The moment they hit your tongue. It's bad
Yes
and then
They like taste like something the way you described it of like when we were kind of we're eating them and everything and you were
Just like you're the initial taste sucks
of we're eating them and everything and you were just like you're the initial taste sucks and then it's like and then there are flavors yes and it's so weird
because that's exactly how they all were the Korean barbecue one hits that one
the hardest that one was like what the oh okay yeah because it was a weird
taste like right at the top and then man it tasted like going to Korean
barbecue yeah but it doesn't taste that good on this chicken.
No, no, no, no.
Mango habanero, I think was the...
That one was so sweet, like fruit jam.
Like, not like, like a mango has like a juiciness to it.
This was like, if it was preserves.
And then they went- And it probably was.
Yeah, and then they went, also spicy. spicy very spicy did it taste like no lightning was a piss light was a
bottle any piss like grease lightning but it's piss light drink some water Go piss lightning. Go in the river, boop, boop. Piss lightning, go piss lightning.
Not a cup of water inside.
Tell me more, tell me more.
Dude, they had that race in the riverbed
and he's like, the spikes coming out.
Just a piss lightning smoke effect.
This was such a weird peach flavor. And then this was such a weird peach flavor.
And then this was such a weird mango flavor
that it was like candy more than it was the fruit.
And I'm not used to that with like food
or fast food or whatever.
Usually it's just sort of like a muted thing.
And the mango was like huge.
Anyway, I'll rate it now, I guess.
No, no, no.
Because we're not gonna get to our ratings
or our reviews until we get to what you have to say in our segment
that we call You Review.
You did it.
We'll read it.
Who wants to do the first one?
This one's short.
Yep.
I'll do it.
Robert M. says, they forgot my fries.
And there was sauce on less than half of my chicken sandwich
There were two workers outside arguing about someone who left poop on the lot
That's it that's the review whose poop was it where did it come from?
What were they arguing about who has to clean it up who left it there? We don't know just wasn't appetizing
I don't want to hear
Will never know there's shit out here what?
I'm talking about someone who left poop on a lot one was murdered by many boys
Excuse me forgot my fries. I don't know it's human shit
Do that left poop on the line yeah, do the next one too
long okay, okay
Brenna see
Manager messed up my order took 20 minutes through the drive-thru, so I was late for work. Oh
Manager handed my card in receipt and took my wedding ring off my finger when exchanging my card to me If I could leave zero stars I would horrible experience
He was a convict yeah
He said something about getting only getting two dollars an hour. Here's your food ma'am. Oh no
Got it
Well better go to work. Where's my ring? Wait? This isn't a ring, this is a whole chicken head on my finger!
How did this get here? Ma'am, please come inside, we'll show you how we do this!
Then I got home, and my husband was kissing someone who was pretending to be me, and kept saying,
Look, I have the ring to prove it!
And it was clearly that guy in a wig!
Ruin my life! Two stars.
The person turned around and who was it?
The Stuart.
Then I was killed for being shot multiple times.
I don't understand what happened here.
Manager handed my card in receipt
and took my wedding ring off my finger
when exchanging my card to me.
How? By accident? Like really, really? Like really like covertly or just gonna give me a lady your card?
It's something we can both hold on to
Like my hands like this you're not gonna take my ring my cubic zirconium
No, I take your card with both hands
Clap them around there start also they're covered in palm. Also the manager's hand had 20 rings
Can't wait to get the next guy. He kept telling me to call him the collector. Oh
Man that's my favorite Mass Effect DLC
Assuming control this is the last review yep, I'm Tom B. This is great great start. This is the last review. Yep, I'm Tom B This is great. Great start. This is nuts. I'm just letting you know. Here we go
Here is Tom B's review
I decided to dress up as Colonel Sanders for Halloween this year and I went into this location a few weeks ago to ask the manager
If he had any tips on what to buy for the costume. I spoke with Tim
It goes so much and he said he couldn't really help with the costume. I spoke with Tim, as you know, and he said he couldn't really help
with the costume, but told me to definitely come in if I did it and they would give me
a 10-piece free just for letting them take a few pics. Pretty cool, I thought. And I
got a pretty kick-ass costume together. So I guess he didn't need to go there at all.
My date, Wendy, yup, the cute little redheaded burger queen, and I went out of our way yesterday to drop by this KFC on our way
to a potluck party. Talked to Tim and he gave me a bucket, but no chicken. I
reminded him that he said he would give us a ten-piece and not just a bucket,
but he just walked away and ignored us. Not a huge deal, but this guy was
definitely dishonest and I'll always think of that when I drive by this KFC.
We bought the 10p since we told folks at the party
that we were bringing KFC,
but it's probably the last KFC I'll buy, ever.
Yeah, well we had to.
What?
Huh?
That's his review of the restaurant.
We would look like stars.
We would look like absolute fools if we showed up with an empty bucket.
Hey, I'm thinking about getting KFC for dinner.
What's the best way for me to plan out this costume?
Duh! Go to the KFC and ask the manager for hot tips on a good costume. Yeah, he was probably friends and went shopping with him
Huh?
Wha? My date Wendy yep the cute little redheaded burger queen. If I didn't hate this person
Before I do now. Yeah, he I that right there deal
Are you sure you're writing a review about it?
They went out of their way to drop by
and get their free 10-piece,
but also you didn't go out of your way
if you needed the bucket and the chicken for the party.
Right.
It sounds like you had to go there.
He just walked away and ignored us.
Not a huge deal, but this guy's definitely dishonest.
So we bought a 10-piece.
What's up with Tim?
Dude, I thought Tim used to be cool,
but then Tom's telling me he's not.
This crazy.
That's so weird.
Tim, what happened to you?
Did the Stewart get ahold of you?
You were different, man.
You've been feeding people chicken heads.
Geez.
I felt like he was cool, now he's just dishonest.
Wow, he is definitely a dishonest person
Unbelievable here's a bucket. Excuse me. You said you would give me a free ten piece. Goodbye
Hello, I guess we're buying
We're buying a tent piece. Oh, you can hear me just fine
Do you think they put it in the free bucket or he got a second bucket?
I hope he got a second bucket this fuck, this stupid fuck.
Hahaha
If I had known I could have just bought a regular bucket eating the chicken and washed it out.
I went out of my way to bring everyone KFC that I said I was gonna bring so I went to KFC
What are you talking about?
But it wasn't free, it was supposed to be free.
Also, welcome to the potluck. I brought a bucket of chicken.
From KFC.
How come no one else is dressed up?
It was never...
It's July.
Oh, dishonest Tim.
That's a wild one. That's a review for the restaurant to let people know if they should eat there.
Guys, don't go here.
If Tim is there, he'll die.
He didn't talk at all about the food.
They won't tell you how to dress like the Colonel or give you free chicken.
One star.
What am I going to walk in and just buy chicken and leave?
This is crazy.
Not my KFC.
What the fuck?
They really changed when they abbreviated it.
Everyone loved the chicken though, I don't know.
And I kept telling everyone at the party,
this cost me money.
They didn't know what the fuck I was talking about.
They'll never believe this.
I had to pay for that.
And that was the last date I ever went on with Wendy.
Michael Voss. I was like stunned silent.
We thought here's the thing about putting together the you review.
I try to order them sometimes I'll put like one that I think
is really crazy last because I'll find him in like a
different order. This is the order I found them in and I
escalation escalation was so
perfect. Poop in the parking lot that led to stole my ring that led to the costume party
thing. Also, also it's interesting because just as a matter of how long we've been doing
these, generally the longer they are, the angrier they are. Yeah, this guy. And the
more convoluted, the fact that the poop one was two sentences. Right. And it just ends.
He's probably the most pissed.
Yeah, they were poop and it ends.
Yeah.
There's usually sentences and diatribes about it.
This guy's going, anyway, somebody for a sweet costume.
And it just goes on and on and on about nothing.
Right.
In a calm but disappointing home.
I mean, it's about something, but it's not about this restaurant.
It's not about the food.
You believe they didn't help him
If you want to eat here I recommend it if you need costume tips do not recommend do not talk to Tim
Yeah, he will lead you astray. He'll trick you into buying chicken. You have to buy anyway. I wanted to go trick-or-treating
I just got tricked. Yeah, I
Went to this KFC expecting a treat I ever get tricked I if I were gonna have see KFC unless I was in
prison there this guy might have gotten me fired because I genuinely just go are
you fucking stupid are you a fucking moron hey what's up man you got any tips
I'm gonna be Colonel Sanders hey hey fuckhead I just work here and hand you
the chicken right do you think I was- What the fuck are you talking about? Do you think I went through some sort of course on Colonel Sanders' attire?
Could you-
Hey, here's a suggestion.
Look at what he's wearing and then go find clothes that look like that.
Why the fuck are you at KFC?
Write it down, write it down, write it down.
We went to this-
Huh?
We went to this KFC today.
What the fuck?
This is from the KFC we went to.
And it was fine.
Right.
But would you have asked any of those?
Oh, hey, do you have any costume tips? No? I wouldn't ask anyone that question. I would use the internet
Mmm. No dice oh
man um
Well, that's that's your review not a complicated outfit. No well start white
Yes, and then probably I would not even think there's probably a vest or something
You need it's all my blazer black bow tie not much to it, buddy glasses
Goatee thing it's that like white hair. It's like shoestring about guys. He's a weird southern guy, and that's it mm-hmm
Dye your hair white do a goatee you're there ta-da
Tom you have a guy next to you get shot to death.
The Stuart! Andy! Bring some mules to tend. Yeah halfway through the party have a man named the
Stuart kick the door open and then you shoot him in the shoulder. Oh it's a it's an interactive
dinner. This is nice guns sound really realistic dinner and tournament
But that's that's your review now, it's time for our review guys. What did you think of KFC Jordan?
What do you think well saucy nuggets?
We talked all about them some of them were good like the Chipotle ranch and the mango mango habanero
Some of them were weird like the Korean barbecue and honey garlic
Also, the honey barbecue was was like just from a flavor standpoint, objectively bad.
Because BBQ sucks.
Their BBQ specifically is very bad.
It's just like BBQ, just general BBQ sauce sucks.
I'm more mad at the Korean BBQ one for not being good or better, and the honey one, I
was just like, of course you're bad.
You're a honey BBQ.
And then I guess, what was the other? Honey Sriracha? That one was good too. More hits than misses for me though.
Okay. Yeah. And I was pretty shocked by this. Okay. Um, and I was really like the last couple
of weeks, I've been like, I'm letting these, I've been going easy on the restaurant. I agree,
you have been. And I really wanted to hammer him. But I kinda can't.
So I feel like I'm
I backed myself into a corner here.
And I have to give it...
Just flail your way out.
Logic doesn't prevail here.
Interesting.
Every episode of the show just figuring it out.
Remember when we did this podcast already
and then we undid it?
Go check out the Michael Jordan podcast. We can do whatever we want.
We don't have to do another podcast after this.
We're done in like 10 minutes.
That's awesome.
I was legitimately enjoying some of these though.
Me too.
So I have to give it a decent score.
I'm going to give it a 69%.
Nice.
Just under 70.
Yeah.
Okay.
I'm with you on some of that.
I did like some of these flavors.
Fucking weird.
Well, don't.
You save yours?
Yeah, I would if I were to go back I would just get the Chipotle ranch give me a ten piece of that
I would eat those. Six bucks for ten of them. I'd eat that and be happy. It's not crazy.
Michael loved all of them. So I didn't love them as much as Jordan
I also didn't hate them there were definitely some that were better than others,
but it was so middle of the road.
If I had to like rate specifically on them, right?
Like if they had a one through five,
like half were a 2.5 and half were a three.
I agree.
Right? Where I'm like, eh, that's not very good.
This one's a little better.
See, I had no fours.
So I'm just like, I'm right in the middle, but like probably a little less than middle.
Uh, like they weren't bad by any means.
Mm-hmm.
But I'm just like, eh, I wouldn't go back for any of them.
Okay.
Um, I'm gonna give it a, I'll give it a little over, give it a 52%.
Okay. Okay. Okay.
That's a 60.5. 60.5. I didn't hate them. Once again, we're right on it.
Yeah, it's uh, I was surprised by some of the flavors and how sort of like bold they were.
Not all of them were good, but some of them were like... From these other places, they're just like,
I guess there's a hint of that in here. That mango habanero is fucking crazy.
Like, I don't want to order another 10 piece of that,
but that one was nuts.
It was so jammy and hot.
It was bizarre.
But speaking of bizarre,
we're going to get to a snack right now
in a small 100% treat that Nick brought in.
I was really wondering if he was just holding that
for no reason and was going to eat them.
Nick brought in Hatch chili and sweet lime sandwich cookies
because it's hatch lime season.
It's hatch chili season.
I'm not gonna like this.
Central Market does like a month where like
they just roll out a bunch of hatch chili flavored things.
And it's usually pretty fun.
No way I'm liking this.
No, you're gonna hate this.
No way.
What are you doing?
Are these not for me?
I'm gonna like it.
This is gonna be tricky for me.
I'm not really sure what to do.
That was fucking bold.
I'm definitely not supposed to eat stuff with my aligners in.
I'm not going to do that in front of everyone.
I'm just going to go for a bite and see what happens.
Okay, here's the thing.
Don't tell my orthodontist. Didn't hate it immediately.
It's not as limey as I thought it would be.
I don't really like lime.
But then the heat kicks in at the end and it's not good.
It's not hot, it's just like, ugh, why did I need that?
I don't like this at all.
I hate this.
Wow, that heat really comes in the back.
It's all in the back.
It has not reached me yet.
I don't like it.
Back of your throat. It's not too hot, yes. It's not like, oh, it's so hot. It's just too like. It's all in the back. It has not reached me yet. I don't like it. Back of your throat.
It's not too hot.
Yes.
It's not like, oh, it's so hot.
It's just, it's just too hot.
It's there a little bit.
I don't want it there, yeah.
It's like Pop Rocks in the back of your jaw.
Just going pop, pop, pop, pop, pop.
This sucks.
I hate this.
20%.
Go to hell.
I would agree that it's not good.
Go to hell.
Oh, it sure is lingering now.
See?
You getting the pop pop in the back?
Yeah, that's where it lives now.
Right.
That's so weird.
The initial flavor also is not anything.
It's kind of just like...
I thought it would be a lot more lime.
It's still heavy on the cream, whatever that is.
Yeah, it's definitely cream heavy.
A little bit of lime.
And then the vanilla, I guess.
And then the unnecessary and not really good pop pop in the back of the
throat. What'd you give it? 20? I think yeah. 20. I forgot
already. I'm gonna have 40. Okay, average score of 30. I
love it and I would eat a whole sleeve. No, no, I definitely
should not. Put it in the fridge. Tell you one thing.
Then we have tomorrow. What an exciting development. A very
weird sensation not being able to feel your teeth
while you chew something.
While you're over there, throw in some KFCs.
You can have that tomorrow out of the refrigerator.
Bring them back.
Yeah.
No, you have to go buy new KFC.
I'm talking about buy a bucket of chicken,
throw it in there, and then boom, he's back to camping.
And then I have to-
Jesus Christ, man.
Keep track.
Then I eat my cold soft chicken, disgusting.
He's not camping, so he was confused.
Well, that's the Hatch Chili and Sweet Lime Oreo Cookie
thing from HEV.
Jordan, do we have a 100% fan?
Yeah.
This is, for real, the last one we have.
Wow, really?
Yeah.
Okay, hey, if you are a 100% fan,
don't forget to fill out that form.
There are people that are on there
that have not filled it out, guaranteed. So don't forget to fill out that form there are people that are on there that have not
Filled it out guaranteed so don't forget to do that
Jump the line on those fuckers yeah, you can sign up now. I'll put you I know you at the top of the list
Oh, yeah keeps track. I got it all here. Yeah, but you at the top this one is from Ryan
He's got a general message that says don't mind me. I'm just just here for those voices I've been hearing for years now, I'm listening.
Hell yeah, see?
He's listening.
Oh, he hears it.
Hi, Ryan.
Thank you, Ryan.
Thank you very much.
And if you want to be a 100% fan, get a 100% shout out.
I was listening to the episode that came out today,
is the time of this recording,
and forgot what the 100% fan shout out
and his shadow raid was, and I laughed out loud when I heard it again.
I thought that was fucking great.
And that was the last time you laughed today.
That was it.
And then I sat quietly until it was time to go
pick up a fridge.
You go to patreon.com slash 100% eat to sign up.
You become a grackle or a compliments grackle
and you get the Michael Jordan podcast.
You can hear angry Eric.
You can listen to the first 30 minutes of this podcast
before it became this podcast.
No, it was never this podcast.
That's why I made that claim.
It just really never felt like it.
No, it was very strange.
You can also go to store.100%eat.com
or 100%eat.myshopify.com.
Go grab a shirt.
We have some new designs that are going to be coming out soon.
Yay.
We'll have more information on that soon.
I'm really excited for the new designs,
for the new things that we have coming out
and international shipping, which I'm very daunted by,
but we're going to get it figured out.
What are we closing in on?
You can follow us at 100%eat on Twitter and on Instagram
or on YouTube.
Watch this episode if you're just listening to it.
Oh!
We have a great new setup.
You can see what pissed lightning looks like. Oh god.
You can also send stuff to the P.O. Box. This P.O. Box 14-32-41 Austin Texas 78714
that's P.O. Box 14-32-41 Austin Texas 78714. Great. A lot of stuff. We're inside the PO Box. Yeah, we live in the PO Box.
Some of this stuff is from, Gracie-style,
is from the PO Box.
The little knives,
like switchblade things.
The hat that I'm wearing over here
on my standee.
A lot of great stuff coming through.
So thank you very much.
I just went to the PO Box the other day
and usually if there's something that's too big for it,
they give you a little key
and they got like bigger lockers and stuff.
This was the first time they were like,
we couldn't fit something in the, in one of those lockers.
So you gotta go to the desk and this guy meets you at like
these like, these Dutch doors that like,
one opens at the top.
Oh I've done that one time, yeah.
And then he pulls out this long pyramid-shaped...
What is it?
I, we haven't opened it yet.
You wanna open it right now?
I wonder what it is. No.
It's sitting right there.
I think it's a big old Toblerone.
It's what it looks like to me.
Michael doesn't wanna open it.
We'll open it. We're so efficient!
We'll open it in a 100% treat. You're undoing everything!
It'll be the first thing we open.
Right now! Why would you say stupid things? You're telling me another 100% treat will be filmed with the stuff being sent in the peel box
People keep sending stuff to PO box one four three two four one Austin, Texas seven eight seven one four
We will always have stuff to open on 100% treat. That's so exciting
So that's how you got a kind of bait. Yeah, that's what you were trying. Yeah, that's what you do. Yeah
Yeah, go fuck yourself peddling so never get a snoopy
That that's it that's a podcast Nick says if that's not a double-roam send one
Rate subscribe tell a friend about the show or eat food and rate the food as a perfect. I am done nothing
But now I only done something right today
Bye bye