100% Eat - Graysie in the New Studio %% Cheesecake Factory Triple Berry Bliss Cheesecake
Episode Date: August 6, 2024Graysie (and Our Heroes) head to Cheesecake Factory to get get a bite of the Triple Berry Bliss Cheesecake. And the buffalo blasts. and the avocado eggrolls. and who had the two orders of fried mac n ...cheese? some artichoke dip for the table? It's a lot and it's compounded even more because Graysie is FIRED UP when she's paying attention. Sponsored by Mando. Control Body Odor ANYWHERE shopmando.com and use code EAT to get $5 off your Starter Pack (that’s 40% off). Check out http://100percenteat.myshopify.com to grab a shirt. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Welcome to 100% Eat, the show where we try every fast food restaurant
to let you know
if you need it.
You probably do.
I'm your host, Michael Jones, alongside my co-host Jordan Sweers and Eric's all up in
there.
Jordan, how are you?
I was fine until he got in front of the camera.
I was checking.
I was checking.
But you were the one racing for us to start.
Yeah.
And the second we started, you're like, hang on, we've started too freely.
All of this was like, so excited excited so excited to be in the new space
Yeah, grace is here. He hit a wall grace. He did
Hi everyone yeah, hey guys Gracie's here new
You can't go backwards you can only go forward and try not to make the same mistake
I only wanted one but these two are stuck together.
Look, this is what happens.
Also, we talked about it at dinner and everything.
Yeah.
We did a 100% treat, which is what Snack Attack used to be, before we went and recorded that.
Uh-huh.
And Nick is just weirder than ever,
grabs snacks that we don't want to eat,
I mean-
Squirreled them away.
At some point, I feel like we're just being annoying.
Grace, you're gonna have to read off that.
So you're gonna have to read off that after five years.
But it's never normal.
No.
It's not like, oh, that's Nick, you should expect it.
Like, I kind of should,
but it's still surprising at his frequency and ferocity
You'll see this when a thing happens and it's like all that matters in the universe to him
It's like his it's like it's like his fucking
Diverging point is like it's like if I don't get that skittle now. Yeah, my life miserable forever
While Jordan's like talking about the weather. Yeah
My life could be miserable forever. Meanwhile, Jordan's like talking about the weather.
Yeah.
And like, he just sees red and
just like one orange skittle.
Tunnel vision. Yeah. It happens so frequently.
Yeah.
I forgot what I was going to say.
You can
see in the video that we did where all this happened.
But, um,
Nick wanted
these snacks so bad. And Grac Gracie at the same time was
trying to find the building yeah and we were like Nick go stand outside so Gracie
wanted to be in the end of the video. I'm recording you two are hosting Nick is
the monkey and it's like go. The most important one. Go. go yeah Never asked him to sit down never asked him to sit down not only did he never asked him to sit down
This is a video that comes out this Saturday if you're watching this right now, Gracie
Not only did he not ask him to sit down. He preferred he stood
Ignored him and did not
Pushing Jordan on the couch. Yeah
And I would have the box and He kept pushing Jordan on the couch. We were sat like this with him on the end,
and I would have the box, and Nick's in the box
as I'm holding it with Jordan going like this.
But there were snacks on the table.
And you're going, hello?
I know how I want to call my girl and not like what it is.
I couldn't answer. I was filming with my phone.
But don't worry, guys. I found the building located.
No!
That's why we didn't give her the complete address. Jesus Christ. Oh my god. She was going to dox us. We knew what it was with her. But Nick was going out and checking like nope she's not out there coming back in. Food's still here? Dude. Let me get that. Two seconds outside and then going she's making a U-turn and we're like right but you could direct her to get in here and he went I don't know where she is. He just kept going back in and then, and then I would like get a, or I would see a slack from Grazie just going, help, help.
And then, and then Nick standing in the room with us and be like, look for Eric's car.
Yeah.
Give him the least useful advice.
I know.
It's the one with the door.
Yeah, right.
He's had his **** so.
God damn it! It's the one with the door
This is less than five minutes after after Gracie just did this in the right of life That's why he left the door open too, so when he stormed out he wouldn't have to open it
But I mean okay, so I don't I want to it's fine. We'll censor it. It's fine. What did I say was gonna?
Yeah, but it's happened three times. What do we all agree with you on? It's fine. I can't be trusted. Let's get ahead of this
Let's not overlook the fact that grace is weird is that like she never did this when we were at roosterteeth
She never was like everybody. You're what everybody knew that was nothing to docks
Stuff there there were secrets being held there
Can't help but tell secret hey Gracie's here. We did go to the Cheesecake Factory
Gracie's here. It's another night episode. Yeah, because Gracie's got real job. Yeah
but Factory hell yeah, he's here. It's another night episode. Yeah, cuz crazy's got real job. Yeah but
See and have seen we are in our new office. Yeah
It's our space permanent space. Yep. Our names is on it. We can come and go whenever we want
I'll be here a lot. Yeah, I'm gonna sign up
No
No, why would we do that?
We don't want people to know where we are. Don't you get about all of this?
What
Is like Sam's fishing
Used mattresses something nobody wants to buy
Stay away. Okay, once thing nobody my bad. We spent
mattresses we
We spent on these four chairs and this yeah, $60. Yep, Texas surplus
You know it that's why some of them were they were what
There may have been rhymes with gummy stained looking chairs there
were some the ones least stained yeah we were chairs were nine dollars yeah so they're more
comfortable than what we've been sitting in for months they really are dude remember remember
the fine the fine chairs at aapw yeah yeah the mix and match of I think this one will stay together as I sit on it
Hey, is this one okay? And I think they use that for matches. Yeah, I think that's a prop
I might be a gimmick chair. Uh, there's fake blood on mine. No, there is no
We found a trapezoid desk we found these four chairs
I was like desk was a great find by the way
Yeah
before we went there what we wanted Eric was like it would really be cool to have one with like some some angles. I go you're looking for
a trapezoid desk. And you're like yeah yeah and it was the second desk we saw. Yeah we just went ah! It reminded me of elementary school.
No big time. Well all of this stuff. This one was like 35. Yeah. So the first one we looked at was $20.
Yeah. We stamped it up. I thought this one was cheaper cheaper So you know Texas surplus is a place where if it was a government building and they shut down
They send the stuff there and then sell it to you like at less than cost
Yeah, right the chairs all nine, but like there's a lot of old technology as well a lot
Right a typewriter started playing with it turning around and going this is like 25 bucks
I should have should have what I found which was not for sale because it was just I think part of the structure and
There was no price on it, but I wanted was there was a bell. Oh
Nailed just nailed to a stud. Yeah, I'm like how about this?
Smell start ringing it good episode me the doorbell when I arrived. Yeah, we'll this. Podcast bell. Start ringing it. Good episode. I can be the doorbell when I arrive.
Yeah, we'll put it out there with a sign.
Gracie rings here. We're gonna put these cutouts of us out front. I'm so glad that you fucking kept these things dude.
I kept them. As set decoration. They're awesome. Were those in your house all this time? They weren't not in my house.
Did they sleep in the room with you? Well, I didn't usually not in my house
Well, I didn't I didn't usually sleep in my office unless I was in trouble
Also, I guess I guess if you if you were asking I also never took them out of my office up to my bed This is That's where they go at night. They want her to be lonely down there. Night night Jordan, night night.
No, this is great too because they're much more
in the frame.
Yeah.
It was you guys, it was the heads cut off.
Yeah, we did all this like set decorating
in like the span of two hours as well.
Yeah, for no money.
Yeah, we, these are old shelves from my house.
Yep.
And then this is all shit we had anyway.
Just stuff, fan art and stuff like that.
We put it together and then we went to the Texas Surplus,
bought this stuff, drove back,
Eric took a little longer,
and then it was like in under two hours
that we put this together.
It was great. It rocked.
It was great.
And the AC almost worked pretty good.
I mean, it works better than it. Yeah, then previous night recordings only
Can I ask about the one sound?
Detonating block on the ceiling. Oh the sound
Detonating block
What is that's like a bomb? dampening
Detonating would be detonating be the opposite of what we're loading sound to blow up dampening is like lessening
Right. Oh, did you? Yeah, okay good
What's with the detonator? Yeah
How that room sound fucking loud
They got to do something about the sound
Nick wanted to put one on the ceiling right above everything
It was the last piece that we had
Oh, I see
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
So we just, we kinda did this
Me and Nick were here the other day
We got a bunch of this done in like an hour
We got the little, I don't even know what we're calling that room
The other room
Yeah, the other room
The play room
We got room one
We got other room
I brought a bunch of plants
Yeah
They're nice plants Oh wait, where's the plant that we were talking about at dinner?
It's a big one. It's a big one in the corner big one. You gotta look at a huge walked out
There's a little okay. Well you can't appreciate it to the crack. No, it's pretty nice. It's a palm palm leaves. It's not
Right I don't think so any who I'm not a plant
I don't think so. Anywho. I'm not a plant guy. Anywho. Let's get off this topic.
This is how it's been since like Gracie walked in.
I mean before. Yeah. She walked in.
Yeah. Yeah. She said we did a 100% treat.
Y'all knew I was coming. We did do 100% treat.
And there was something given to us by Nicholas McKay.
And now, and you guys didn't want to read it.
We thought it was too crazy approved.
So it's fine.
Snuggle solution with real life heartbeat for anxiety.
I hope Cinnamon enjoys this from Nick McKay.
She would have loved it.
We just opened it, but she's definitely having separation anxiety now I would say that she isn't
anymore I would say that she isn't I you got to think of it like a half glass
eyelashes oh see but it's kind of serendipitous because it would sent for
cinnamon okay so that she wouldn't
She'll get it later. She'll get it. Oh, whoa. She's talking about her dog. Who's passed. Come on
Is the heart in there? Yeah, this was sent as
I'll get it She's not gonna get it. The heart? None of this shit. This was sent as a thing for the dog
Yes, so when it was separated from Gracie
But now Gracie can use it like her dog who's been separated from her forever. I can hear going
Oh, yeah, it's making a little noise
Can you hear it now? Just like cinnamon. She'll get it
Just like cinnamon
So I think yeah, my goal is reading like oh wait there's modes all the features. Oh great
Stay on for eight hours
To turn off Eric, please wash your hands first before you go in for surgery
This is how they used to do it before germ theory velcro. What's going on? He just trimmed his nails wait guys. It's not turning off
I can hear it. Oh, they're good. Okay, so hold it a lot longer than five. Okay. What is this? Um?
this oh this
Hang on hang on here. Go ahead and put the heat pack inside. Oh, there's a heat pack
But does this go in it too you microwave it?
Right, but then where's it go in the dog? Yeah. Oh, no. No, you don't microwave it
In both do not
Microwave on it. I know you're making me think I'm gonna like those little tricking me
And I'm gonna eat the shit out of it. Why are you doing? It has to shake it to heat it up
Cuz she's cold
She's just a girl
She's just a girl in morning
She's just a girl in morning
Let her shake what she wants
This is, this episode is fucking crazy
Oh man
It's the second time
She just plopped something on your arm
But also went for like a reaction.
It's way cooler than my skin temperature.
It was, it's just like a solid 80 degrees.
Oh my god.
It's not 80.
Oh man.
And then Nightmare made us some fidget toys.
So thank you, Nightmare.
Oh yeah, thanks Nicholas.
Nicholas made a, got a doll for Gracie.
And then Nightmare made some fidget toys for us.
This one's a comb.
But also you're glossing over it.
I mean I don't know if you want to show it off.
Yeah I guess we should although
Again it is in the video
that we shot. Maybe we'll just
wait till next week. Okay.
We'll hang it up. Nice right?
Dude he's so he's not anxious anymore.
It's like my cinnamon's back.
Oh we both have cinnamon's that are gone. Rest in peace all cinnamon's. I bet there's other people in the Dude he's so he's not anxious like my heart is back
Yeah Rest in peace all I bet there's other people in the club to let us know
Hit that right behind you just hit that red button
How did you get that that was recorded forever?
How did you do it?
Did you hold record and then talk into it? You can have that
Well, no because that needs to be here now. So I'm gonna guess we can't ever record
No, it's a button and talks into it. Uh-huh. Then when you push it it plays what you just said. Yes
Technology works
You are on the episode where we did this you explaining it while she was
Yeah, uh-huh yeah
She didn't get a fuck about what you had to say whatever
You know what all that matters just answering your question. Oh man cinnamon lives guys
Yeah
Ha Jesus
Man, uh so how was Cheesecake Factory? Yeah wasn't Jesus, but it was fabulous. Yeah, oh our server fabulous
Cool, dude clanked around one time bonkers board right at the end though. Yeah, he is clank. Yeah link the loud
There was no need for him to clank
It's just so much trash there's skittles
trash there's skittles
Quickly the trash has built up around grace it's just like the old studio. Oh my god How are we supposed to film that one was my fault? That's true. God damn. Lay down and tarp
Well you just keep to your own pluffle
You can you can trash your own pluffle as much as you want. I can't that thing is sacred. That's the last place cinnamon was
I'm kidding well
We don't know
Well fabulous was our server
And I guess we're reviewing the Cheesecake Factory's triple berry bliss cheesecake, I mean it's the it's the
It's a thin premise to get us in the door.
You know what I mean?
Gracie is picking up Skittles right now.
I don't want them to.
Well, she said later and later's now.
Later is after when it happened.
Yes.
We decided, because we knew it was gonna be
the most expensive meal in the history of 100% Eat,
let's do appetizer dinner.
It's true. It was a nice family style...
Girl dinner.
Sharing...
It was. It was very much like that. And then these two got entrees.
Right. But I got something off the Skinnylicious menu, so it wasn't really that much food.
It doesn't count.
Right. It's more the price.
And you were very upfront.
We were talking about getting food and then the idea turned into, we'll just get appetizer
dinners and I kept going, I'm still getting dinners though.
And you 100% did.
And I knew the whole time.
It wasn't like I blew that plant out of the water.
But here's what happened, because it's rolling downhill.
Because you did it, then he did it.
He did it at then the last second it
was yes funny and that sent him immediately nose in the yeah I know
because I got waiters the waiters took the menu yeah or the waiter took the
menus like it was like okay that's it that's what you're getting and he was
collecting them all and Nick was still doing that,
and the waiter went, did you wanna hang on to yours?
And he didn't answer.
So we answered for him.
Yeah, and we went, yeah, he's gonna hang on to his.
I was reading.
Yeah, he was going, uh, uh, uh.
He wants his menu.
And he was like.
Didn't order anything after that, though,
but he held onto it.
But fabulous to give us a knowing look like, okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
All right.
We also started the meal with espresso martinis because Jordan said, oh, espresso martinis.
I've never had one of those.
Despite how trendy they are right now, everyone's having them.
It's like the drink of the summer.
It is.
And then Michael said, oh, we'll do five.
And then Nick went, yeah.
And then so we got five.
And Jordan kept going, I know how trendy they are a bunch of times, huh?
And then we drank it I feel like I said it once but okay, and then we drank it and we agree
It's like all regular martinis better. Yes, Gracie must have agreed also
Because she had one sip and then Michael had to espresso
I think I drank both before anyone finished theirs.
Absolutely.
But I drink them fairly often.
Yeah.
And I ironically drink more now, but better.
You okay?
I'm more of a common drinker now.
You never know, another one could strike.
Be on guard.
No, I'm good now.
Alright, cool. I went, this is good. No. All right, cool. Yeah, I went this is good. Mm-hmm
And Gracie couldn't believe it. She literally like she's like she went like this, but then she went she went
think with my arm between I
Don't like this
Do you do you want it?
I was like, oh absolutely. I didn't want it to be public ticket over and then I cheers George
Well, yeah, you some confusion. I just finished
Like oh you got another one. It was pretty good, but that was a nice way to start the meal
So basically I got I think it energized from you did you got you got?
Revved up. Yeah, and then and then just by proximity I guess Gracie also got very silly
I'm always very silly.
Gracie got revved up on pretzel bites,
which when we ordered...
Oh, don't forget about the Buffalo Blasters.
Buffalo Blasters came out first.
Fabulous came...
Was it...
You just threw your phone.
Someone's phone was just thrown.
Whose phone is this?
I think it's mine.
No way. No way, huh?
How did it go there?
I don't know. How did it get there? I don't know. How do they get there?
I don't know.
Somebody get me in the leg and there's a phone.
How do they get there?
She's kicking again.
Our waiter, Fabulous, walked over as Nick and Gracie were
talking about what appetizers we should get because we
decided on an appetizer dinner.
Somebody said the word Buffalo Blasters.
Buffalo Blasters and Gracie started going,
Buffalo Blasters is so good.
She literally went, oh, those started going Buffalo blasts so good
Like I think we're gonna get those so then we ordered all of our so I went a Buffalo blasters Yeah, fabulous already knew he was like yeah, so
Background he's like I I get it, they are good.
Yeah.
So we got those, avocado egg rolls, cool.
Two things, a fried mac and cheese.
And then I went, what was the other, there was another ending?
It wasn't even like, I don't even think, you went, I think that's it.
You're like, I think that's everything.
And I was just staring right at you.
I was staring right at you and I knew you had forgotten. I totally forgot and I was and I could feel the heat
Started vibrating. Yeah, and so like I just started saying and we'll take the pretzel
Less subtle if she went cough pretzels cough Eric
I didn't read it because I didn't see any of it
I saw a sudden movement sure but it didn't read to me like it was like the hidden cough
I thought she had like exploded like she was going
Somebody hit her pretzel
Somebody hit the pretzel detonation
Pretzels!
We can't reach!
It was fucking crazy.
There was no way, we had a reservation, we didn't need it.
Walked right in.
Did you even tell them we had a reservation?
He did. I did.
The guy was like, could not care less.
I'm like, we had one at seven, you can cancel it. And He did. I did. I was like could not care less. No, I'm like I'm like we had one at seven you can cancel it and he did not acknowledge
Check the computer. Yeah, I'm sure when a reservation comes in it goes into like a
Trash can in the back. Yeah, exactly
But I just didn't want it to be we got there at a certain time and then we got fucked or whatever
So I'll just get a time in whatever. Yeah, right. You never would have gotten the bread or the pretzels
I ate so much bread.
You kept eating the bad bread. No I didn't.
When I said that the bad bread. When I said that this bread was better you were eating the other one.
This one is so hard. I had six pieces of brown bread and then all the brown bread was gone.
So I had one piece of white bread. Jesus Christ! I had one piece of brown bread, period.
Now do you mean one piece or one like connected thing?
No, no, not one loaf!
Okay.
One of the little sections.
I had a couple loaves.
I technically had two brown loaves and a white piece.
Oh my god.
I had a couple loaves.
Did it get you fucking amped?
Yeah.
No.
Michael told me to eat the whole loaf. I was ripping and he goes, just take it. Well, I told you that because I immediately I grabbed it because there was so much bread.
He brought us like two baskets.
It was like, it was a lot.
And, uh, he could see it in his eyes.
Like, like the loaves, quote unquote, it's like three little pieces.
Yeah.
But there was like seven of those pieces and there was so much bread for all of us.
I just grabbed one and I started eating it.
And Eric made a point to be like, oh, you're just grabbing like the whole thing.
The whole thing and not breaking it off.
And I'm like, yeah, there's so much bread.
And then she started like, I'm like, no, just take the whole thing.
Just take this.
We don't even have a bread fight. Yeah. We're going to be all, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Yeah, we know It's fine there was like nine plates of butter
I was like I feel like it's already butter. I just started whatever and she goes I'm getting into all that I've crevice
I was told about the crevices. Yeah, I'm putting everybody butter in all the crevices every crevice
Gracie was double buttering.
Oh yeah. Oh, she was going crazy.
I did not comment on it at the time.
I love butter.
I think you love bread.
Bread and butter is like one of my favorite things this entire run.
My biggest turn off with it, like the bread was good enough already.
There's so much food coming in, I didn't care.
But when it's not like whipped I went has too much work for me
The butter was it was soft it was soft
I'm not saying it wasn't but he was still in a square with you, and I just went I don't even care
I'm with you. I don't even care
You got a butter yeah, good raise your blood pressure
I'm just I'm in the right along and my blood pressure is just going
Yeah different reasons
Okay, I just pointed to it
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Honestly, that's just the required talking point
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I said tell us.
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Why aren't you talking into the microphone? There's no video. He is holding it by the
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It works so well. I have noticed you've been less smelly. I don't stink
It's phenomenal like you you stink but not odor wise
No, you still stink. Thanks, but not odor-wise. No, thanks, you still stink, thanks.
But it's like a personality thing.
Yeah, unfortunately, can't do anything for that.
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Ooh, I have used the deodorant wipes.
They gave us some and I took them on my trip.
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cause I want them to keep sponsoring us,
because I want this deodorant is so good,
it's the only thing that works for me.
Thank you, Mando.
Thanks, Mando.
Did you know Mando is clinically proven
to control odor for up to 72 hours?
That's cool.
Peanut butter and bacon biscuits?
Has HomeSense always had all this great pet stuff?
Oh, and Dad, look!
Made with locally sourced ingredients.
We should get these for the dogs!
Peanut butter and bacon biscuits?
That sounds like human food, not dog treats!
But they're only $10.
$10?
You know I love to spoil my little fur babies put them in the cart
Deal so good everyone approves only at home sense
Hey, do you guys want to learn about cheese? How many Nick how many times you heard this?
Good I've heard it
That is meant for people like me that need to I'm just saying
They're really cool these are great because they say stuff on the side
Yeah All right, we're gonna do the Cheesecake Factory I was just curious. They're really cool. These are great because they say stuff on the side. 100% eat. Yeah, 100% eat.
Listen, listen to 100% eat.
All right, we're gonna do the Cheesecake Factory.
What's wrong about Cheesecake Factory?
Our last Cheesecake Factory episode
is Face Jam was August 30th, 2022,
where we ate the bee sting and cock-chio-a-peppy flatbreads
and ahi-pokey nachos.
It received an average rating of 73.5. That's pretty good. It was like $95 before tip
Well, did y'all know what was coming? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, so it was like it really was like three things
And I don't remember that oh, yeah, 70 3.5 is pretty high. Yeah, I mean you got the the flatbreads were pretty good
I don't think you probably ate the pokey nach, but they were pretty... I think they were decent.
Yeah, but the the flatbreads did really well. That beasting one is still on the menu. So it hung around.
Next fact!
Anything else on that? No? Okay. All right.
Next fact!
Can I interview someone who works at the Cheesecake Factory for my student project? We're sorry, but we can't give interviews or questions for school projects fact taken from Cheesecake Factory website
So this is just happening all the time, huh? This is a frequent what projects
factory consult stop asking
Or begging you to stop asking us to be interviewed.
My momentary pause was me going, I don't know, Eric, why are you asking me if you can interview someone?
I feel like you could have talked to Fabulous if you wanted.
Just don't tell him it's a student project.
No, you're not allowed to do it.
Don't tell him it's a student project. I feel like we interviewed him just fine.
If we had a fucking hidden recorder going, they would have never known.
Oh, we also got recognized by someone who worked there. I wish I would have caught his name.
He wouldn't have let us interview him. He would have broken the rules. He they would have never known. Oh, we also recognize by yeah
Yeah, he would have yeah, you would have broken the rule he definitely would have yeah, but he came to me He's like hey big fan subscribe on patreon. Yeah, it was like
He said loved face jam hate the new show. Yeah, I thought that was very odd. Yeah, why'd he say that the fuck dude?
It's messed up. Thanks for subscribing
Enjoy the Michael Jordan podcast this week
He's a bug. He does not get it.
Oh, no. No, he said he was a compliments grackle.
Oh, did he?
Or a grackle. Yeah, I heard the word grackle.
Yeah, okay.
He did.
That matters. Yeah, that means that's you get the other half of the content.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Real loss is a bug.
Yeah, it'd be a mess.
Remember when we did one episode of this every two weeks and that was it?
Yeah, and it was more work? Yeah. right. How did it felt like they did feel like more work? Yeah
Loving it now. You're loving it now. You didn't love it 30 minutes ago
Factories menu is nearly 6,000 words long and contains around 250 items
The menu is set up to be a quote talk trigger which
is a quote a built-in differentiator that creates customer conversations.
Really great conversations like what the fuck is a glam burger and I do not have
room for a cheese cake. I feel like shit from that Shepard's pie. Riveting.
Well how did you know what everyone was going to say in the restaurant?
There are like 15 pages in the menu. It stupid I don't know it's there or like the
wontons like someone has sheep there's so much on the menu you what I want to
know how big he's in the corner of the room going spaghetti and he's doing it again doing this
We were looking at the menu and and spaghetti was brought up
He was brought up
Spaghetti was brought up and Gracie goes don't choke on it
Also, I went also I said I might get the
Fettuccine Alfredo and Gracie's like, is that your favorite or something?
Did you get that at Olive Garden?
And I go, no.
And she's like, we get that every time
that we go out to eat, which was Olive Garden.
And I went, no I didn't.
And then Jordan went, that was me, I'm Jordan.
And then for some reason, Gracie felt the need to go,
I know who you are.
I just don't know what he's eating.
We wanted Gracie to- I think then you just just went and I can't tell who's talking yeah
We wanted Gracie to come back with a fried ball of mac and cheese
They were too big it's here
Transported be a
Yeah, Gracie did have to drive. Yeah. She would have to put it in a cup holder
Yeah, we know you're sitting upright the back of your head was filmed every time he talked
More facts tired too many things on the menu by the way. I'm tired
Grady's getting bored
She's literally going
Well you totally
Yeah you took a fucking toy away
I mean I didn't tell her and she couldn't
I asked Nick if he could hear
Shhhhhh
Hey what time is this over?
Hahahaha
Remember right when we started Eric was like, can we get this started?
Yeah
Let's get going, start the episode
Hang on
And the grisly, we are located at
Hahahaha
The restaurant, come and find me!
Face me cowards.
I won't be here by the way, I don't work here.
The restaurant known
the world round is referenced in Drake's
song, Uh-oh,
Child's Play. Oh no.
With the lyrics, quote
Why you gotta fight with me at Cheesecake
You know I love to go there trying to strike a chord
I can't believe he has a song called child's play. That's fucking crazy man. It's a big Chucky fan. Yeah
He loves Cheesecake Factory, I don't know that I would say I love Cheesecake Factory. I don't like it at all
I mean the food was good there. I hate that place
Yeah, dude the bat is like being there is bad
I were there as a normal person and not the you know
I mean that was the pregame for what this is right we were not there as right if that was the main event if that
Was just like what yeah, but what? Yeah, but you make sense. Yeah, we know.
We know that you make sense.
I love it.
I love it.
This demographic.
No, I immediately looked at him to see
if I got a reaction and he didn't.
It's just like-
That's weird because you guys were definitely
on the same page in the restaurant.
If you said to me, not that you ever would,
but like, hey, wanna go to Cheesecake Factory
for dinner or whatever?
I'd be like, no.
No.
Not at all.
I had my birthday dinner there one year.
That's fine. That if it was four years ago was it your first 16. No this was two years ago
my 21st
Wow, we're your first joke and they're landing much closer actual reality
I got her she's a puppy. It was like 2008. She said here's a picture of baby cinnamon
I went just cinnamon. Oh, yeah, she's like seven. Yeah
I show them the photo. Yeah, it was on is your street address. Yeah, I don't live there anymore. Okay
I'm holding up my birth certificate
No, it wasn't that one. Which I show them whichever one you want. It's your picture. It was that one or the other one oh my no it wasn't that one which I showed whichever one you want it's your picture it was that one yeah no no
you're just do it just take care of it watch out for the Skittles no I think we
got it yeah got a job yeah Gracie was like so there's so many Gracie I thought I had them all yeah, she wasn't done yet. Yeah
It was like oh, I was in college you're two years before you fucking worked here
It was like I was going into first year and that oh no I was in first grade
I wasn't going into going in the first grade. She was in first grade straight
Okay I wasn't going into going in the first grade. She was in first grade straight Okay
Did your parents put her in a box and have you open it up and did they were they like
Was cinnamon like barking in it and they were like, oh you better open it before the batteries run out wink
No, actually crazy went to bed Christmas Eve woke up dark darkness. She was in the box
Grazie went to bed Christmas Eve woke up dark darkness. She was in the box
On the porch On the porch yeah
Knock on the door open dog
That's how cinnamon was born
It was awesome Christmas pop I got a dog for Christmas when I was like five or six and that's how I saw my parents
Did it it was in the box and stuff?
Let's back any who?
The Cheesecake Factory hey any day now
We should have grace you on it's been a while
You're so pleased with yourself too.
I'm just having fun.
She's in play mode.
The Cheesecake Factory and two janitorial contractors in California have paid one million dollars in connection to a state wage theft investigation.
Wage theft is the largest form of theft in the United States.
The second largest. The price is on this menu.
$24 for rigatoni. Check please.
Someone spotted this out very early on.
That they love, like in 100% they love you pantomiming the fact.
Because he clearly writes them.
And then as I read them he goes...
It's... I'm writing it and I'm doing the bit writes
I'm writing it and I'm doing the bit and I'm going this is gonna kill it every time like
$24 for a rigatoni a check
After next time we think about dropping some cheesecake factory money on dinner. Maybe throw this out there we get teleprompter oh
well we have to use pieces of paper oh she went she went wait and then went oh
like she figured out what it was and then didn't care right right but we will
every week fuck a prom forever that's the show
Yeah, yeah What the fuck is this? Hi, I work here now Also, you know, we're talking about
I'm making money decisions
I don't know how we do this
I feel like we need a camera on Nick now
You think so? We have this
We should go multi-cam eventually
And we just get like a little security camera
He looks like he's in time out
It cuts to him, it's not even like
I don't want it anywhere near the quality of this camera
I don't want it to be the quality of this camera. I want it to be the same angle.
Little webcam.
I want like yeah like a top-down webcam on Nick in the corner.
Like a ring doorbell.
Making his freak gestures. You can't. You can just get a ring doorbell and plug it in.
And boy is it like we have this beautiful set here shooting. Anything off camera is a mess.
Like oh yeah Nick I'm surprised.
I mean he's at least got the background behind him.
It's cause Nick has his cookies.
That's not terrible. He's like in a sea of cables okay cool yeah but from the from the legs up it's pretty good yeah
he I will say a point five on the very first episode you gotta see the floor you gotta see his treats
oh absolutely we can see your treats what you know you have them what's that one oh what a treat
Treats what you know you have back. What's that one? Oh?
What a treat
No, I will say to it looks even worse. It really looks like we fuck Nick over because he didn't get one of the nine dollar chairs
This isn't how the table is gonna be This is gonna be in the middle. So at the narrow end is flipped over here
Yeah, and then we're feeding out
Yeah, probably like that and then he'll have the red chair in the corner
That's why we made sure to not get the coming chair
But if we got the fifth gummy chair, he'd be sitting comfy. Oh.
Real comfy.
Nasty.
Jack, please.
I was gonna say that reminds me of like...
I'll have what that chair is having.
Ew!
Well, forget what I was gonna say
At least we're gonna do better than the third episode right like this is great. Yeah now we're speaking
I feel better now we're climaxing I feel
I feel better about how quickly I'm gonna be able to get home after this yes
No, no, it's not gonna be at six locations. We're not going back to an olive garden
What direction? How many blocks would you get?
10? 12? 40?
North? South?
What are you?
Central Austin? Are you closer to Kyle?
Lugerbo?
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
I just want everyone to know where y'all are.
WHY?!
And what your middle names are!
And your middle names are
Walking out 15 minutes of guessing names walking out me going fine me going hey Can you guys stop for a second take this picture having everyone pose for a picture? It's quiet big smiles. Okay cool. Let's go to the car
Okay
Just sound or a hustle
Fucking weird it was so crazy. I love game dude
Any game I can get yeah, are you enjoying are you enjoying strands?
It is hard yeah, the hints don't really seem to do much for me.
Or not the hints, the...
I was going to say the hints tell you what the word is.
They don't do much.
Oh, the theme, the spangrams.
The theme you sometimes got to over...
Right.
You can either overthink it or...
There was one recently that I was like, that doesn't really add up.
There are some really mean ones for sure.
This is... we have to do... to do, shut the fuck up.
Nick, what do you think?
I love it, it's fun.
You're a big strander.
Yeah.
I do it, I do it every time,
it's just sometimes I struggle.
There's a great-
Eric gets stranded a lot.
He's on an island, he needs a lifeline.
We have to do puzzles and pluffles so it stops here.
It's not, that's gonna enable the beat
Yeah, also also I've got the word all in two. I got the world on two. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. He's one of us. Yeah
Thanks, man
Wait, what color pluffles are y'all gonna get?
But they make a blue one. I don't think we're all
You're not you're not in puzzles and pluffles. I
Absolutely
Mean world, I thought it was only me Jordan and Nick. And then you quit!
Gracie!
What about that?
I got laid off.
Nick told me that Costco sells pluffles now. Let's go.
Well, we got to get a Costco membership. Wait, but are they cheaper?
My dad has one. I have one too. Oh great. Oh, I thought your dad had a pluffle both of
my parents have tested out my pluffle our big fans that's different than
buying one no but they were both like this is nice
mm-hmm they get it but not I'm gonna buy one I'm just saying that's a
escalation right to be like oh that thing you got I checked it out it's
comfy and like yo let's go get them. Yeah.
This episode's gonna be long.
You could be, you could be parent-fluffles.
Why?
I don't have that little clock anymore.
We just ripped through it.
It's literally in front of us.
It's right there.
I put it right there.
I haven't been looking in that direction.
I haven't been looking in any direction.
The camera?
Gracie
Flynn.
Yeah!
You are on thin ice.
He's gonna believe it, it's gonna be great. Yeah, I can go
Let's learn about the food all right cheesecake Factory triple berry bliss cheesecake you have to explain what this means to me
What do you mean think the restos classic creamy cheesecake a layer of fluffy vanilla cake?
Three types of berries and a kiss of citrus.
It comes complete with a generous whipped cream garnish,
fresh mint, and a rim of white and pink chocolate girls.
Why did you laugh?
Chocolate girls.
I just don't know why it's coming with whipped and rims.
What is a resto?
Is that a restaurant?
I was wondering that too.
It's slang for restaurant? It's the restaurant.
Is it restaurant?
Yeah dude, you say, whoa, she can factory.
RESTAURANT
I'm sorry, that one slid in.
It's the besto resto?
That's awesome!
It's going on the bonkers board for that.
That was bonkers.
Ain't nothing going on the bonkers board to get a god damn bonkers board.
Michael is in charge of the bonkers board.
I'm putting it here on the episode.
You gotta execute on the bonkers board.
Okay, but I asked and then you were like, I don't like that one, but then you said nothing
else.
So which one?
I mean, I threw out some suggestions.
I gave you some direction.
You gave me the direction, which is not a bonkers board at all.
And it's like the name card thing.
Well, okay.
We also talked about maybe like-
I'm fine also getting that, but that's not the bonkers board.
That's a behavioral check
And it's like it's like little packets with our name and these slide a card either green yellow orange or red
Based on how you're on how bonkers you are right, but that that's fine
It can combine with the bonkers board, but then there's got to be space for just written explanations
Yeah, why are you bonkers? Okay? I think white board
Just write Gracie middle names. Yeah. Why? Yeah. Like that's pretty bonkers. Right there? Bonkers. That's gotta be more than bonkers.
Clankin' like crazy. Yeah, clankin' fabulous. Dude, everybody was clankin'. Don't put fabulous on there.
Well, this guy was clankin'. He was clankin'. She was clankin'.
Yeah. I was trying. We were clank free. I was free. I wouldn't say I was clank free.
Well we were. I didn't clank a single time.
I bet you clanked.
I didn't clank a single time.
I put forks and knives down.
It's impossible to not clank.
This is also like the conversation where she said she could make whatever the fuck she was talking about last time at home.
And then looked it up and was like, oh I can't do this at all.
What was it? Oh the first one. It was the breadstick. She's like I make everything, I know this, I know that. I can make them.
And then you went you know there's no eggs in it right how do you make that
without eggs and she went oh fuck. What? This is the same thing. It's the same thing.
I think you clanked based on what? I don't even remember. I bet you did. You didn't clank you
you loaded all your pasta in and then you fucking punched the top to make sure it was
sealed.
That's what you did.
And then Jordan at one point went...
An intentional clank.
I don't count that either.
No.
But that was after everybody was going nuts.
Everyone was clanking.
What do you expect people to do in a restaurant?
Just not be smashing plates together.
Stop clanking.
No one was smashing, but we had 95 plates on the table.
That's when you be careful.
Yeah, I agree.
That's when you go ape shit. What do you expect people to do in a restaurant? Just not be smashing plates together. No one was smashing, but we had 95 plates on the table.
That's when you be careful.
Yeah, I agree.
That's when you go ape shit.
That's the difference between Michael and Grace.
Exactly. Bumble knows it's hard to start conversations.
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Still no.
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Quote, The Cheesecake Factory is very pleased to commemorate National Cheesecake Day by introducing our
Triple Berry Bliss Cheesecake Supporting Feeding America, said David Overton, founder and CEO of the
Cheesecake Factory, Inc. Additionally, we are happy to provide our cheesecake rewards members
Cheesecake rewards capitalized members not capitalized with a special dining offer and
exclusive cake merch offer on July 29th and July 30th
Cake merch offer I remember two days was the day! A cake merch offer! Only for two days!
What was the offer?
It's cake merch!
Merch!
And Gracie kept telling us how she's a member!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I got a free cheesecake last time I was there.
You got free everything today!
Did they tell you about the cake merch as a member?
Did you get a tip?
No, this was a long time ago.
This was a long time ago.
The merch wasn't on the table yet.
When you're like 11, a month is a really long time.
A year and a half ago was recent.
When I think of something and it was like
April last year, it's like
oh, it wasn't that long.
Do you need water? Are you good?
Was that yes, you're good my god. Do you need water? Are you good?
Was that yes, you're good or yes, you need water
Okay, well while she's doing that we have our specific feelings about the cheesecake factory
She's clinking off camera when we get the N for Nick, now we need one for the other room.
Just in case something exciting happens out there.
Because now I want to see it.
I want like some ten frame image.
Black and white.
Like a bigfoot.
I choked on my own saliva.
I do hate when that happens.
Also, your Stanley Cup is so big.
It's fucking huge.
It's in my head.
It's a bigger than your head.
Do you have the little charms and attachments for it
when you go out?
Mm-mm.
Wait, when I go out?
Like people take these out?
On TikTok?
Who did?
On TikTok.
You're holding it right now!
I thought you meant like go out, go out.
TikTok people will be like,
wait a minute, get ready with me to go on a walk walk Are you telling me people fucking leave the house with this thing?
I thought he had
Oh he already needs a drink
He's joking
He's tired
He's tired
He's tired
He's tired
He's tired
He's tired
Okay back to this We have I can't explain what I was going to say without it getting revealed.
Okay, so you wanted to know if I have charms.
There's like little attachments that people have, like a fucking like little tiny cup that also clips on to the handle.
Why do you need a cup on your cup?
You don't. That's why they're just charms. Yeah, that's why it's dumb. It's like the croc accessory thing. Yeah a gibbet
Yeah, it's something like that. Yeah
Yeah, or is that no not that giblets
The whole thing that spawned this conversation. Jiblets.
You said gibets.
What comes out of the turkey?
Jiblets!
Third base!
Everybody say giblets.
They went around.
Well, we have our own opinions about Cheesecake Factory,
but here we have a segment where you let us know what you think, the segment we call You Review!
These are one-star reviews of...
No, they're not.
...Cheesecake Factory.
So who wants to read the first one?
I think Gracie should read the first one.
Gracie, read the first one.
Read the first one-star review.
And who's it from?
Delane W. Who gave it?
Three stars read it. I should have looked at the reviews before going my steak was horrible and and three shrimp on 20
Just read it like it was horrible and three shrimp on a
Steak and shrimp plate
$15 call drink host hostesses, dot dot ellipses.
Terrible, should have gone to McDonald's,
at least you know what you'll get, ellipses.
Go anywhere and get a better meal
and not spend $150 on two people, ellipses.
He starts it by saying three stars.
He wrote three stars.
But it rated it one star. He rated it one star. Yeah. But did he give wrote three stars, but it rated it one star. Yeah
Did you give it three stars?
Did you read what was written well I did I struggled through
$15 call drink. $15 call drink.
Hostesses.
What do you mean by that?
Now you're starting to get you review, Gracie.
I remember struggling last time too.
Oh, it's because you're reading yourself in the mind of the reviewer.
Which is incredibly difficult.
I'll do this one.
I see a lot of capitalization on the last one.
Who you got?
This is Roshaka B. I called in my order, the phone was answered,
and I was placed on hold.
During my hold period, I drive to the restaurant.
What?
What?
As I walked in, the phone rang,
and the order was taken immediately without an issue.
I was next in line, I placed my order while still on hold.
The restaurant and staff were not busy I need to compose myself after I placed and paid for my order my call was
answered 20 minutes later I explained this to the staff and manager I was told
sorry they did not seem to care or concerned I was told the process by the
manager and their process failed miserably However, I am not paid to fix it, but the lack of concern says that this is a known issue
I I I get to the point where
I explain this to the staff and manager. I was told what the fuck is wrong
I'm gonna test this Hang on
Yeah I'd like to place an order
What kind of insane behavior?
Psychopath
They think they're about to pull up the most ultimate gotcha
What happens?
I was just waiting for them to be like
Hello thank you for calling the San Antonio Cheesecake Factory headquarters
Yeah that's something Eric would do what happens? That's true only happen once
Then you got anyone a car accident yeah because of his mix-up I did mm-hmm that wouldn't have happened if you didn't do that
What happens if he gets in his car he's still on hold and he's driving there
He's like oh, I'm gonna get him. But they answer two minutes into his drive,
and they go, hi, okay, yeah, sorry about that,
wait, what can I help you with?
He's just pleased.
Yeah, right?
I don't think so.
I see what you're saying.
I know.
He's gonna be more mad because his plan is now derailed.
I know, that just, that, I wouldn't say it escalated,
it shocked me that it was, I was on the phone,
it was taking forever.
Anyway, I'm driving there, and I went, I'm sorry. I'm already on my phone. It was taking forever anyway. I'm driving there
It wasn't even a build-up like usually there's like it was so stupid
I had to get in my car and drive it was like that was part of the plan yep
That's the confusing part
It's not as smarmy as I would think from a person who would do this like the way
It's written is not smarmy, but the action is the action sure is because it seems like just someone's real weight to pull like
yeah to be like mmm and you have failed my test miserably yeah but but then it
kind of you get kind of that with the end however I'm not paid to fix it yeah
of course um no shit yeah I got through this whole review and I thought you
were getting paid to fix it. I thought this guy was the guy who was supposed to fix this whole review and I thought you were getting paid to fix it.
I thought this guy was the guy who was supposed to fix this fucking thing.
I thought you were doing them a favor.
Alright.
Last one!
Last one from Corey M.
Let me first start by saying my wife and I will travel far and wide for a good brunch.
Why'd you go to Cheesecake Factory then?
So we were really excited to learn that the Cheesecake Factory offered brunch on Saturday and Sunday like any restaurant that has 495 things on the menu.
You can get brunch for dinner.
Jordan, we went there with smiles on our face. The server, Kayla, offered us
fresh squeezed orange juice and we were like, oh yeah! I love fresh OJ! Then Kayla came back and
took our order and said they were still squeezing our juice. Then our food came.
Still no orange juice. We ate our food and thought it'll be any second.
Dot dot dot. Nope. Orange juice never came. We asked to speak with a manager and the
manager proceeded to tell us that the kitchen makes the orange,
and sometimes they get backed up.
Keep in mind, this was brunch.
There wasn't even a line yet.
The manager did nothing except put a nice period
on the end of unpleasant experience.
We had a great time and you didn't go,
oh, excuse me, I didn't get my orange juice.
Like one time.
Oh yeah!
We were so excited.
Oh, the food came out so fast.
It was so good.
We were loving it.
But we were thinking, I'm awfully thirsty.
I'm not gonna ask the waiter about it or inquire anything.
I'll ask to speak to the manager directly
for my orange juice.
I'm interested in what goes into the kitchen
making an orange. Yeah, no, I don't know
They grow them. Yeah
Like makes the orange. Yeah, they're in the back. They look like shit
The guys like he's squeezing a hundred of them go
Why do we do this of all the like fuck-ups of like waiters and wait staff?
Yeah, like going at a restaurant over the easiest thing ever is when they forget like a drink or a condiment
Yeah, whatever you know what I mean, like even if it they forgot or they're just like shitty or whatever, the easiest thing ever is when they forget like a drink or a condiment or whatever.
You know what I mean? Like even if they forgot or they're just like shitty or whatever, but like they fuck up your food
It's like fuck this thing forever. You get it like hey, I just like I haven't got my drink yet.
That's like a two second fix. Yes. And like maybe they tried it and just didn't say that. Mm-hmm.
But it seemed like again when it went to we were thinking it'll be any second now, but we didn't ask or remind them
That's just weird Jordan. Are we boring you?
I'm trying to get ahead trying to get ahead dude. I fall behind your puzzles
Yeah, I'm preparing a future segment of the show
Thank You Gracie.
We're gonna make oranges.
Jordan's like, make oranges?
Well that's just like the guys in the kitchen.
I looked at the clock, which is right there by the way.
And it said about 55 minutes, I was like, I need to get a fanshan.
Yes you do! But before we get to that, we're gonna pick up some more Skittles.
I have no idea what you're mouthing to me right now
You can just say it to me
He didn't do it on the last one either that you were on
She was way too high on Olive Garden that day. I don't know
Well you were I've retired I've retired from the high quality calling it that
She got serious again call you what
Okay, so it's hiding behind the fact yeah
So we went and you gripping it like and we are
So we went and we are
We went and we're reviewing
We're reviewing the triple berry bliss. Oh you forgot how good it felt Why did you comb your hair with it because it looks like a little comb?
It's a fucking comb. I said the exact same thing
It's a fucking comb. I said the exact same thing
It's a little comfort little hairs as a first thing hairs as a first thing I said
I'm with you on that one. Yeah
Her hair great you don't need to worry about it. You won't have to worry about a comb soon yeah it's just grayer than
ever do you diet no yeah yeah after after the knot and it's all why you
were gonna go bald I implied you'd be dead
No need for a toad! Shhh!
It looks, it's quite cool.
I don't know why, but this is the last straw.
Brush this!
Holy fuck.
No, it's going to hit the detonate button.
We're all done for.
My mom, you're going down with me!
His last, his last act of malice.
Oh my god.
Oh my god. oh my god oh so um we had food it was all
pretty good triple berry bliss but you got yeah yeah they were good uh I don't
have to write those I can not write all the things we shared um I did not like the avocado egg rolls
Based on the amount of dissent I got from my opinion. I thought the whole table was against me
Yeah, I didn't touch them I didn't pick one up I just fair enough. Yeah, so I mean they weren't good
Yeah, there were other things on the table the mac and cheese by it's fucking awesome
They were so fucking big yeah, I dare I say I think they used to be bigger
If you want to accuse them like
You might have just been like smaller.
I remember I used to be able to look over it.
Also, did the tables get shorter?
Yeah, I'd have to reach up and grab it.
That's crazy. I've never had them before.
You've never had those?
They're like almost the size of a baseball
Baseball size yeah
Yep, that when like hail starts like coming and they're they're gonna say beware of Cheesecake Factory
Size tail that's why but that's why both his cars got fucking total
So the triple berry bliss cheesecake though,
what did you think of that?
That was also great.
I only wanted to have one bite
because we ate a lot of food.
But that came out and I was like,
I think I had like three or four bites of it.
Yeah, oh, it's fucking good.
The one berry that's like,
just like the gel spread or whatever,
because there's other forms of berry in it. The one that's like a jam was like the gel spread or whatever, because there's other forms of berry in it.
The one that's like a jam was like the best one,
like the most flavorful.
But I thought there were like layers of flavor
and they all complimented each other well.
It was like very interestingly complex.
It was complex.
For a cheesecake factory cheesecake.
But the top layer of icing was thick.
It looked like cream or whatever.
It was pretty dense.
It looked like meat.
It was like, it did look like meat. It looked like cream or whatever it was. It was pretty dense. It did look like meat.
Just like from the side of it,
it looked like they were baked like a mullet.
Like a marble. Yeah, canned ham.
It didn't taste like meat. No. But it looked like meat.
It was weird. Little weird looking, but very delicious.
How do you make something like this?
Someone, someone... Hang on, Jordan.
Yeah, I'll hold.
I think he used a 3D printer, right? I hang yeah, I'll hold I think he used a pretty printer right?
I'm driving. I'm driving
Put in my rating before I'm put off hold
Driving right
Sorry hey, can we take your score? Oh sure. Yeah, hold on
I'm gonna give it I'm gonna give it a very surprising. Mm-hmm even for me
82 Wow 82%
Just on the cake or the pipe just the cake just the cake pie, you know, you know the classic
You know the pie cake the cheese pie cheese pie factory
The cheesecake, and the appetizers.
Yes.
The pie cake cake?
Pie? Which is it?
Fucking cares.
Like that's what she tunes back into.
Like that's what she tunes back into. You know what I mean?
Like...
Hey, so how do you think...
How do you think...
How do they get a ship in a bottle?
He's just starting...
She's literally making the noise, dude.
Straight up the teacher going,
Am I boring you?
She's just like, fuck, I already ate the food, you're gonna leave?
Oh my god.
Michael, what do you think?
Dude, I can't believe we're rating it on just that one dessert.
I mean, it was fine.
You can rate the whole experience if you like, but it really is bad.
The experience was stellar.
Fabulous, it was fabulous.
I mean, he was a great server, by the way.
Everything was good.
He, all the fuckery was us.
What I really liked about this space
was we had an almost entirely circular booth.
We got like the Sopranos table like
PF Chang's. But what was awesome
is usually you can like
see over the headrest. It was all lined
with mirrors and so I didn't have to
look at anyone else in the restaurant.
That was awesome. I loved that.
Like I could hear people, but even
though we were in the middle of a big open room
I couldn't see anyone
It's not a thing I've ever thought about like I can't stand looking at the back of that guy's head
But having experienced not doing that that's only how I want to dine from now on
I just don't want to look at anyone. No private dining only it was like
It was like a faux private din, it was like faux private dining.
It was awesome.
Self isolation is the dining.
I sat in that booth last time I went there.
I liked it.
On your birthday?
No, I've been back since.
Yeah.
Jordan?
As I go, I go there a lot.
They know me by name.
They don't, but.
How many times have you gotten fabulous as your waiter?
Never, I don't go to that.
That one?
The other one.
She's in that booth. She said, no, but that booth go to that one the other one boo hey no but that was in the other location that was style not that
specific yeah sorry that style god right you would have that one's on me you
would have understood that if you weren't on your phone
sorry you're still on hold yeah oh did a great experience I could eat I could eat
six of those macaroni bites things.
People call them macaroni bites. They're not bites.
No.
It's like macaroni ball.
Boulders.
Yeah.
It really is like a tennis ball.
It was pretty good.
I, again though, I find myself not thinking I would ever go there under a normal human circumstance.
Right.
And not as a circus troupe.
Even as good.
Because it's just such a to-do for like food that's good.
It's not amazing.
It's also pretty expensive.
And I hated everything about it once we stood up from the booth.
Yes.
And I was back in the restaurant.
But today alone, I'd give it a 90 experience.
Yeah.
Wow.
Good job, Cheesecake Factory.
86 average score.
Good job, Cheesecake Factory. You did it. 86 average score. Good job, Cheesecake Factory.
You did it.
What do you think of that, Gracie?
You can get it later.
Could you quit it?
Why are you still eating those?
They've been there forever.
No, I just picked them all up.
Then why do you care?
Because I picked them all up.
Gracie, if you had to rate it, what would you rate it?
98.
All right.
98%.
Why?
That's absurd. No, I love it there. Everything about it? That's absurd.
No, I love it there. Everything about it.
I love that they all look the exact same.
And the decoration.
You can never tell. You go in and you can't tell where you are.
You know exactly where you're getting into.
I don't know which location I'm in right now.
Have I been in this booth before? I'm in Rome, Egypt!
Fakely Rome, Egypt.
I know I'm in a cheesecake factory.
I'm in a casino!
Wait, speaking of.
They do have that casino feel to them.
Also, did anyone smell gas when they walked in?
No.
Like a gas leak?
In the vestibule at the cheesecake factory.
No, I didn't.
And then it went away so I became less concerned.
Someone said that the cheesecake was worldwide?
Is that true?
Mr. Worldwide?
Yeah, that's? Mr. Worldwide? Yeah that's
Pitbull, Dolly
Yes, they are worldwide where where is an international chain where else that that's why they're so like I think maybe the UK Saudi Arabia, I think maybe Canada
They're in like weird. I thought it was I don't know why I thought it was only an American thing
No, I think Cheesecake Factory is an international brand, okay?
Casually and awkwardly brings an hour and six minutes in
Why I forgot about it
Awesome Jordan do we have a hundred percent time shout out that was awesome we do, but I'm still on hold
Who are you this is from buggy 52 aka Neil
Neil has a hammering. Oh, okay, and it goes like this
She's leaning back checked out Jordan. She's like not with the microphone. She's literally
Like I know when I do that it's on purpose. It's not on purpose. I'm sorry. She hasn't done it for a couple of
We gotta get Mike we gotta get like stationary mics.
Oh yeah, that's the problem.
That's the problem!
I used to be
confined to my little space.
It's also making me nervous that she's holding the mic from the plug.
Wait, I've always done that.
Alright, cool.
Like the time we had couch time for the episode.
Hey, here's Neil's hammering.
Oh, Neil, go ahead.
I would like to hammer my wife for her propensity
to remove the skin from McDonald's nuggets,
like the psychotic person she has proven to be.
I love you, dear, but this is simply psychotic behavior.
Heart emoji.
She throws them away?
I don't know if she's not eating them or saving them for later.
I don't know which one's worse. Because he said them for later. I don't know which one's worse.
Because he said remove, not like eating, eating scraps.
Yes, right.
That's the best part.
That's the only part.
That's the good crispy part.
Otherwise, you're getting like the worst white meat chicken ever.
Are you looking at the skinless chicken?
That is sick.
Ew, gross.
Yeah, nasty.
That's what it looks like.
Wait, is this Neil's photo?
How my fiance eats McN Neil's photo I mean probably
Buggy 52 on reddit. Yeah
She opened read it and went it's from
It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if it mattered if it was buggy and it could have been it could have been let her
It's from her a chance. It's from her a chance
It's from a stranger Neil
We don't know him Neil. Thank you for your support. You can support us at a patreon.com
200% eat that's wild eat the fucking chickens in or don't get the chicken. I feel like I feel like that should be a food court
That's a hundred percent similar to Chris Chris Castellanos and his wife
That's a hundred percent. Similar to Chris Castellanos and his wife.
I want to know more.
You people are starting to get named.
When you're coming in with crazy.
Takes this crazy.
Crazy. Fucking crazy.
But you can support us at Patreon.com
slash 100% eat. You can also.
We got overhead now.
We got a roof over our heads
and overhead.
And we have to pay for Gracie to eat sometimes and that turns out to be expensive
Taking a guess at the bill
260 bucks
$150 on two people for Delaine you can only imagine
three stars
You can go to store dot 100%eat.com for merch.
You can now.
Does that work?
Yes, it does.
I fixed it.
Just don't type in HTTPS.
No.
Just HTTP is fine.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
We have some new merch that we're working on.
Yeah, we've been kicking around ideas.
Yeah, I think we have some really cool stuff coming out
that I'm really excited about.
You can listen to this week's Michael Jordan podcast
if you're a Grackle or above at patreon.com slash 100% eat,
follow at 100% eat on Twitter and Instagram,
see if they eat on everything.
This Saturday, we'll have our first 100% treat video
from stuff that got sent to us at our P.O. Box.
And you can send more to our P.O. Box.
We thought it was all gonna be snacks,
and it turned out to be so much more.
It's mostly dogs and hats.
Yeah, that's not wrong.
Which is why we can't call it snack attack anymore.
You can go to P.O. Box 143241, Austin, Texas 78714.
Almost had it really well all the way through.
Send your things to P.O. Box 143241,
Austin, Texas 78714.
It's like I can see the like little thought bubble
come out of her head and it's just like a hamster
like running on a wheel and she just focuses on something.
Like right after I pointed out her eating the dog, I looked over and she just focuses on the go like right after I pointed out her,
I looked over and she was just rolling the microphone
into the monkey's face.
Why are you doing like little sound?
Why does that have to be sex?
Why does that have to be into the mic?
And then you started reading the PO box
and I guess you messing it up got her attention
and she just went down and started like reading it like.
It's like a kid waiting for leave the table got her attention and she just went down and started like reading it like
That they finished their food 30 minutes ago and like you gotta wait
But if you don't subscribe to that one you're a sucker but sucker. But two, thank you for being on, Gracie.
Thank you, Gracie.
Because then they won't see you on there.
Oh yeah, you guys won't.
You should pay for it.
You should pay a little more.
You gotta pay a little more to get your extra dose
of Gracie.
Gracie unfiltered.
She's, okay, please.
You don't want that.
Yeah, this has been filtered.
Honestly, it's just gonna be us leaving
and Gracie just 30 minutes.
Yeah, let me get in the middle.
You can get in the middle. That's fine.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're right there.
That's totally fine with me.
Yeah, absolutely.
Let's put you and Nick in the middle.
Yeah.
Harrison, I'm fine with that.
Put me in the cup chair.
Let's do it. Let's do it. All right.
I just learned what that is yesterday.
Jesus Christ. Okay.
Rate, subscribe, tell a friend about this show where we eat food and rate the food.
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Bye.