100% Eat - This is Dog Food %% Wienerschnitzel Mac n Cheese Menu

Episode Date: June 4, 2024

Our Heroes, for the first time ever, leave it up to YOU to decide where they eat and YOU landed on Wienerschnitzel because YOU only want to punish and hurt. This week we take on Wienerschnitzel's Mac ...n Cheese menu. Why does it look like soup? Why would they do this to hot dogs? Did Michael like Eric's soda? So much happens in this episode that our camera dies after 10 minutes. Truly a weird one. We've opened up shop at store.100percenteat.com so check out our Launch Collection and grab a shirt to support Our Heroes and show your 100% Eat pride or that you used to listen to Face Jam. If you could fill out this anonymous survey, it would really help us out: http://survey.podtrac.com/start-survey.aspx?pubid=GOq92kfJo4gY&ver=standard. Support us directly https://www.patreon.com/100percenteat where you can join the discord with other 100 Percenters, stay up to date on everything, and get The Michael, Jordan Podcast every Friday. Follow us on IG & Twitter: @100percenteat Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey everyone, it's Eric. Wanted to let you know that we got merch set up at store.100percenteat.com. We have some new shirts, we have some classic designs, a lot of great stuff over at store.100percenteat.com. Support 100% Eat. Let people know that you used to listen to Face Jam. A lot of great stuff. But for now, enjoy the episode. What's behind the Dairy Farmers of Canada Blue Cow logo on your favorite dairy products? Enjoy the episode. show where we try every fast food restaurant to let you know if you need it. You probably do today. You probably don't. I'm your host, Michael Jones, alongside my cohost Jordan swears Jordan. How are you? The morning after, right? This is the morning after. If you listen to the best episode of 100% eat last week. Yeah. This is the, this is the hangover.
Starting point is 00:01:03 Yeah. So boy, what a hangover it is because I mean you just you came out and said it this food sucked Dude, it's a real slop fast This is I know we throw around the word slop a lot Especially after the recent impromptu food court where yeah something were called the slop Yeah, but I don't want to overuse it. It's slop. It's slop. It's it's what you're talking about. You don't need you don't need teeth for this. Just this. If you're watching the video, the macaroni is soup.
Starting point is 00:01:33 The macaroni and cheese is mostly cheese sauce. And you can see some macaroni in it. You do not need teeth to eat any of this. We're eating the Wiener Schnitzel mac and cheese menu. Hey, I was supposed to say that. Sorry, okay, go ahead. Today we are reviewing Wiener Schnitzel mac and cheese menu. It's true.
Starting point is 00:01:52 When we opened, this was the first one that we opened that wasn't like a hot dog, and it was just the regular macaroni and cheese. It was like stunned silence in the room. It was, it was. Everyone gasped. We couldn't believe it. We showed our friend Tina and she just went,
Starting point is 00:02:07 do you need a straw? Yeah. It looks, it's soup. It really is. It's soup. It really, it looks like. What happened? They made us some soup.
Starting point is 00:02:16 That's what happened. It looks like they ran out of macaroni. You know what I mean? Like it's like a. We got a surplus of cheese. Like a soda dispenser when it's running out. Like it looks like the proportions are wrong. The sauce per macaroni is way off.
Starting point is 00:02:29 And it's soup. This isn't how grandma used to make it. He's looking at it, look at him. It's hard to look away when she's caught in the cage. He's caught in the cage. That's why we left it here. But the problem with it, like, is everything. No.
Starting point is 00:02:40 The other mac and cheeses aren't, they're gross. Right, but they got some other little bits in there to absorb some of that sauce. That's what it is. It's the regular mac and cheese has this look. It looks fucked. Like what happened? Well, don't even worry about it because this one,
Starting point is 00:03:03 the soup one, that's the best version of this. Dude. Well, you haven't talked about that sweet, sweet barbecue sauce yet. Are we going right talking about food? No, no, but it's just so I got to come down after last night. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's really nice to see you guys again after about 12 hours. It's like hair of the dog, as again, I stressed over and over again. We didn't drink anything. I should have drank this morning.
Starting point is 00:03:29 I feel hungover. Feels like it. Yeah. Well, something that you were talking about how like you, you like Olive Garden won that round. You, you said you went home last night and went to bed in five, five minutes. Like immediately, like I collapsed, like I got to my bed and collapsed. I, I have a very small story. I went to bed last night. I went to bed last night before my wife, which does not, it's not a frequent occurrence. And then an hour after going to bed, I don't know if I had a nightmare or a lucid dream, but I had to get up and go downstairs.
Starting point is 00:04:03 And she was like, what are you, are you okay? And I went, yeah, sorry. The dog made me come downstairs. And she went, what? What? And I went, yeah. Shut up! Ran back upstairs.
Starting point is 00:04:15 And I was, it was like half asleep. I didn't feel good. It was like from the food. And I just went, yeah, we're like supposed to be partners. So he said that I had to like help him down here. And she just went. What the hell are you talking about? are you talking? What I don't know what you're talking about I came to as I was downstairs and I just went how did I end up down here? Huh? Is that bottomless sauce very it's it's bottomless. It was bottomless. I felt like the bottom came out
Starting point is 00:04:42 for me Call it Alfredo's revenge It felt like the bottom came out. It did for me. You know how Freda called it Alfredo's revenge. Like so much cream. There was so much salt and so much like that was like you're making me thirsty. Don't worry, Jordan. Jordan already finished his soda, but me and Michael are working on finishing each other's.
Starting point is 00:05:05 I've had almost as much of Michael's soda as I've had of mine. Somehow you guys just keep losing track of who's who. First of all, I blame mine on Nick because I was getting ready to get in the car, post up, and then he had to get in and fiddle with it to do the camera. Push it down. No, that's right. He had to fiddle with the camera. And so I was getting ready to get in the car post up and then he had to get in and fiddle with it to do the camera. Rubio, that's right. He had to fiddle with the camera. And so I was waiting outside and it was like a couple of mix up. Then I got in the passenger seat and you're you're driving and you're like, which one's yours?
Starting point is 00:05:34 And I'm like, I'm pretty sure that one is mine. He's like, it's just the one in the back. I think it's this one. And you sipped it and you're like. That's not mine. So then I went, let me make sure. I tested the other one. And then he grabbed mine. Right.
Starting point is 00:05:48 Could have been his. Could have been. I had to make sure. And I went, and I went. And I went, that's Dr. Pepper. And you said it's root beer. Yep. And I went, when?
Starting point is 00:05:54 One of the 27s. 23? 23. 23. 23? I said 27. When you think? Michael Jordan number.
Starting point is 00:06:00 Yeah. Nice. When you think you're about to get a sip of root beer and it is Coca-Cola classic. Right. We're feeling stuff. But OK, that was that was the trash can lid. It's like spontaneous. This is why Shane doesn't have a trash can.
Starting point is 00:06:18 But oh, yeah. Right. We were here setting up and our friend Tina's place. Yeah. And which is very nice. And I'm sitting where Jordan was. He stole my spot when I went to the bathroom. I was sitting there and there's drinks everywhere. Eric's on the other side of the table and there's a drink there.
Starting point is 00:06:35 And I go, I lost it. I lost it again. And he says, with absolute certainty, he goes, this one's mine. The one right next to him. I'm like, oh, okay, good. He drinks it and he goes, that's yours. And then I went, let me make sure. Oh, yep this one's mine. The one right next to him. I'm like, OK, good. He drinks it and he goes, that's yours.
Starting point is 00:06:47 And then I went, let me make sure. Oh, yeah, that's yours. And the reason we even have these drinks is, again, because like we're in this new world of of not having a place to record. We're basically we're basically couch surf. Yeah, so I said we're couch surfing. This this podcast, this business is so... Thanks for supporting us.
Starting point is 00:07:06 It's so smooth. Everything is in place. It's been great. The operation has been amazing, both in the back end with the fan support, the bugs and the grackles and everything. It could not be going better. We just don't have anywhere to record and we're just wandering around. It's like the only bar we're like, dude, everything is solid. Whose house are we going to tomorrow to then meet up and drive to someone else's studio? It doesn't look like it, but we're doing okay.
Starting point is 00:07:33 Yeah, I know. Visually, it looks bad. It looks like we're homeless. It looks like we're struggling. I will say, it's visually very interesting and compelling because it's, what's it gonna look like next week? I know. Are we being a field?
Starting point is 00:07:46 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just feeding Graggles macaroni and cheese. This is Wiener Schnitzel. The idea here was we're getting the Wiener Schnitzel mac and cheese menu.
Starting point is 00:08:01 Well, the idea was the eaters, the 100 percenters told us where to go. And we'll get into that in the facts section. But the thing the thing that we had was, oh, there's these hot dogs and a hamburger with macaroni and cheese. And then we got to the restaurant and Jordan went, what? What are we getting? We getting this also? Oh, no, no, no, no. That's not I wasn't like,
Starting point is 00:08:24 he wasn't manic. He's exaggerating that was he was how you all sound was a little puzzle I was I was puzzled because because I texted a picture to our group chat with Gracie because yesterday We were talking about Garfield and Heathcliff, so I wore my Heathcliff. Yeah great still talking about it Yes, you are better than Garfield down Garfield up my Heathcliff. Great. Still talking about it. Yes, you are better than Garfield Garfield up with Heathcliff Because because he needs help. It's not like it's like if Garfield goes down on this clip is still pretty down the scale Yeah, wait. Yeah, we need to get we need to get Heathcliff up ham ham ham ham ham ham Try to get a ham chant going what's happening? No, I Try to get a ham chant going. Do you like what's happening?
Starting point is 00:09:02 Nope. I, Mmm, sauce, hot sauce. Ew, what's going on? Okay, so, so, I still don't know what he said. So Gracie was looking at the menu. I know the word Pete is in there.
Starting point is 00:09:12 She was looking at the menu. Yep. And she texted us a picture A picture, yeah. Of the macaroni chili cheese dish. Yep. And it looked, like she said in the message,
Starting point is 00:09:23 they look like dog food. Yeah. And I was like, we're not getting this, are we? Yeah message, they look like dog food. Yeah. And I was like, we're not getting this, are we? Yeah. And Eric's like, yeah, yeah we are. And I was like, I thought we were getting hot dogs. We are getting that in this. Turns out it was also this.
Starting point is 00:09:35 And Michael was like, you're like me. I think I did. Hey, so what just happened with the hot sauce? So he kept saying it over and over again, screeching something. Pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pickles, pick again, screeching something. Pecos Pete, Pecos Pete, Pecos Pete, Pecos Pete. And I went, I still don't know what he's saying. I just hear Pete.
Starting point is 00:09:49 And then he picked it up and said, oh, it says Texas Pete. So whatever he has been screeching for the last hour and a half was wrong. And then he went, Pecos Pete. I was. Pasta Pete, Pasta Pete. It says Texas.
Starting point is 00:10:04 Texas Pete Texas Pete. We were at Wiener Schnitzel. We got the food. This is where I was trying to get to. We're trying to, I'm trying to grab. We needed to get drinks. I'm trying to grab forks and all this stuff. And I'm going over, I'm in a corner by this soda machine
Starting point is 00:10:23 trying to grab like forks. And I'm like, if we can get this, we can be done, we can go, it's going to be like a long one, whatever. Behind me out of nowhere. If you're me, Nick just starts going, oh, pickle speed, pickle speed, pickle speed and starts reaching around me to get hot sauce. And I'm like, this is I'm just I'm trapped. I'm just stuck. And then Michael out of nowhere just goes, shut up, stop, shut up, shut up. I have a real,
Starting point is 00:10:50 Michael and I had a different problem going on. I have a real question. Shut up. This is a real question. It was like, it was like he had to pick up Nick, move him and then talk to Eric. And then it was like, hey, we didn't get drinks. And it was like, oh fuck,
Starting point is 00:11:04 we're not going to a place where there's 100 steezes to Bradley. He just kept saying because in the car, which is not what it's driving back, watch, watch the ride along and it is car video. And it is just scares. It says Texas, Texas beat. He got he got caught up in it. There was no way for him to have known. Right. What is he going to do? Texas Pete. What? He got caught up in it. There was no way for him to have known.
Starting point is 00:11:26 Right. What is he gonna do, read it? He's going to look it up right now, like this is going to absolve him. Somehow he'll be vindicated. Peco's Pete? Peco's Pete? I didn't understand.
Starting point is 00:11:37 Oh, that's the soda company. It was Texas Pete. It's, hey, turns out it is Texas Pete. It wasn't a misprint. I think Peco's Pete,cos Pete what he just said the soda company was the RTX soda company That you could get the unlimited sodas from Continued I've only ever had wiener schnitzel on this show. Yes. Yeah, I've never eaten it outside Well, I get this show in the last one right apparently we Apparently we've gone twice. You know what I realized? I realized we talk about a lot how, you know, in many ways this is the Dragon Ball Z podcast. Right.
Starting point is 00:12:13 Right. That was Dragon Ball. This is Dragon Ball Z. Right. Oh, wow. Oh, we're in the good era. That's why people are like, oh, they had to change the name. No, we didn't. It's just a new saga, but it's the new saga. And it's just, you know, we could have called it face jams. Yeah, but it would have been confusing. Yeah. And this is definitely the first villain of the arc. This is the Raditz. This is, yeah, definitely. That might be Nick today. Eric, at least. It's like a piccolo situation. Honestly, let me hold them. You blast this. Take us, take it, take us both at the fucking game I don't have to
Starting point is 00:12:46 yes you do yeah you know I insist yeah we didn't hear about the working guy we were worried about UPS but not working comes and starts spraying us up up. There was a couple bugs in here. No, no, the bugs. The, uh, Wienersitzel is a place that me and Jordan have talked about. Yeah, I don't know if it's specifically a SoCal thing, but there was. It's a California restaurant. Okay. So it's from like Modesto. Gross. Yeah, exactly. Whoa, take that Modesto. Yeah, I mean, it sucks. Yeah, if you live in Modesto, you're probably also like gross. But where I grew up, like you were just saying, it was a place that we would ride our bikes to. Yeah, it was down the street. I'd get two chili dogs and a chili cheese fry and just fucking hammer it. Yeah. Yeah, when you're a kid, it's good.
Starting point is 00:13:37 And then they get your floats and it's even better. Yeah. And then you ride your bike down there all the time. Do we get a Gracie reply? We did. Oh, you posted a picture and said, thoughts Gracie, in the America's fave family of five group text. That's Gracie's name. And she said, ew, that is soup. I feel like text Gracie is totally different than real life
Starting point is 00:14:03 Gracie, but they're both funny. It is soup. That red leg, one of the Yelp reviews. Everything that is soup. She, I think she loved those Yelp reviews. She did. She loved everything. Oh, she didn't have to take notes.
Starting point is 00:14:20 She just showed up. She didn't. We fed her Garfield food and then she can go, why did you call it? It was the opposite of nonverbal. Yeah, it was hyperverbal. She went full. She was in play mode, dude. We never knew solely. Yeah, she may have overcorrected. She tapped on that iPad just long enough. You know what I mean? I think she didn't realize that on face jam, she was only usually in like 75% play mode,
Starting point is 00:14:46 still 25% work mode, and she was in 100% play mode. Yeah. Oh yeah. And she was like paying attention the whole time. She did. She could start typing and get distracted. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:59 What? Yeah. She couldn't see. Gracie can't see is a thing now, I guess. Yeah. I don't know, dude. It's been a long time. Weird.
Starting point is 00:15:06 Anyway, I like wiener schnitzel when it's the things that I like and not the other stuff. Okay. Yeah, like most places. I think I do, but I haven't had it in a while and today made me doubt big time. You know, yeah, I mean, shit. I want to say I don't agree, but fuck, I agree.
Starting point is 00:15:21 Like anti-Juergen Klopp, I went from a believer to a doubter. I'm looking at the mac and cheese hot dog that it's just a hot dog with mac and cheese on it. And it's making me just go like, I don't know. That is the most bullshit thing. It's so dumb to look at. It's like the worst version of that thing. It sucks.
Starting point is 00:15:39 Why'd they do that? I don't know. But we did talk about, I think briefly on the ride along, easiest fucking ordering experience I've ever had in my life. It's for this shit. You got a lot of stuff. And the variety. Yeah. Everything. And we were there when you went four of each. So you want six total? Right. No, no. You've got three things. I want four of each of them. Hang on. Slow down. Slow down. I'm not sure that's legal, sir. This guy walked he's like, Hey, can I help you? And I went,
Starting point is 00:16:07 Yeah, I'm I want three of the chili Mac. Hang on. I'm sorry. Four of the chili Mac dog and he went, Okay. And it was like, even I, I fucked up the very beginning, sir. I've already put 37. And it was like, I fucked up the beginning. And he was just like, No problem. I got you. 37 in it. It was already like I fucked up the beginning and he was just like, no problem. I got you. I got you. And it was like, wow, that's crazy. And then the food came out super fast because there were only three other people there and they were all men who work construction and they were on their lunch breaks.
Starting point is 00:16:36 We were order number two. Yeah, it was zero to uh, that was Wiener Sinsel's a sad sight in the middle. You were riding the high until you got to, Pico's Pete! Oh my God. He literally cornered you. I couldn't get away. It was Texas Pete time.
Starting point is 00:16:52 You're not sorry. I got one. Yeah. Collateral damage be damned. Fuck. God. Every time we eat this place on this show, it's a fucking mess. I remember the first episode we did I was like guys We're going to weenish missile. This is gonna rule. You know what it was it was the it was like a bunch of different hot dogs
Starting point is 00:17:15 Yeah, like the tour of the world though. It was like it was called the world of wieners Yep, I remember that I remember wow Was that where the lady was yelling? Monkey. No, that was another weirdo. That's why in my brain. Yeah. Do not compare wiener since a little infos. I just did. That's insulting. It's okay. You can do it. We make this taste a little bit like cigarette butts. Yeah. Hey, honestly, if we went to Fizzoli's and that's what they gave us, we'd be like, of course. Yeah. Yeah. Fizzoli's, it's doing pretty good. That's the gold standard. No, that's what I was going to get. That was like, I wanted everyone to like it. And then Michael was just like, this sucks.
Starting point is 00:17:55 I go, uh-uh. Yeah. And then we ate it and we went, this might suck. Oh, geez. Oh no. A couple of years in the rear-view mirror like, oh no, no, does this I guess I only like the specific things that I like this place and not anything else. Also, I think it's telling of like of all the trash food and disgusting shit I eat and like I grew up eating good hot dogs. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was fast food. Yeah. Like my secret, like the most like wow, hot dog, Costco hot dog,
Starting point is 00:18:26 Wiener schnitzel made him at home sometimes. And like, and those are just from like the grocery store. They weren't anything like it was never. I love hot dogs, but like never was a thing that was like, wow, yeah, a gourmet dog was not something I would when people are going family part took in one like, oh, this is like a red hot or like, oh, we deep fry this one or this like a different Animal I wasn't on the streets of New York wasn't going out to us where I'm at yeah
Starting point is 00:18:50 Yeah, like 50 of them we weren't going to pinks. Yeah on the regular. Yeah, yeah, exactly But hey, let's learn about wiener schnitzel. Okay. Let's see what this is all about our last wiener schnitzel episode as face jam was February 14th 2023 where we ate the meatball sandwich. Oh, fuck. I remember this fucking thing. God damn it. It receives an average rating of 61. How? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:19:14 Oh, Michael gave it like a 94. It's probably good. And then you went, wow, this is like old Face Jam. That was pretty good. I must have liked it a lot. Weiner Schnitzel won the Patreon vote to, oh sorry, 53%. What? You're good, keep reading it.
Starting point is 00:19:30 Oh, okay. You did it weird. Wienerschnitzel won the Patreon vote 53% to Pizza Hut's 30% and Taco Cabana's 17%. Despite Nick's efforts. Yes, Nick voted for Pizza Hut on our account. It is who were in the restaurant and I looked it up because we were talking about like all the posts and stuff. Um, and I was looking at it and I was like, why is Pizza Hut checked
Starting point is 00:19:55 in the poll? And I was like, who did this? And I showed Nick. He goes, excuse me. Yeah. Um, the, the comments were overwhelmingly, I wanna vote for Taco Cabana because I want them the whole episode to go Taco Cabana. Taco Cabana. I mean, they got it anyway. It was people going, I want it, I want it the whole episode, but I can't not vote for Wiener Stitzel. That's good, and then they get both.
Starting point is 00:20:16 Yeah, and then look at that. Isn't that great? And that's what happens when you're on the Patreon. This is the first time, this is by the way, this is the first time we've ever had True. listeners influence anything on this show whatsoever. And look at what they did. Yeah. Yeah. The first and last time. I was I was driving like two or three days ago and I just cause they're all over drove past Taco Bell and went taco to myself in
Starting point is 00:20:43 the car. You gotta get your kids to start saying it too. All right, here we go. Crazy for dogs. Apparently one hot dog isn't enough. On average, Americans think they could eat three hot dogs in one sitting and nearly half, 48%, believe they could eat three or more. Fact taken from wienerschnitzel.com and mostly brought up because how many
Starting point is 00:21:05 hot dogs could the monkey eat? Honestly, if you had to get before he even gives you an indication of numbers, D how let me, I think, let's think he could go Kobayashi style. Let's, let's also say before he started guessing the last time we had this conversation, I remember what we're talking about was how many could you eat? He didn't matter. He remembers. Gave a number, then we disputed it,
Starting point is 00:21:29 and he went, well, if I was hungry. Why the fuck? What kind of insane logic? How many could I eat if I wasn't hungry was my first thought. So let's just think of that before we get into the hot dog conversation. How many hot dogs could he eat if he was hungry?
Starting point is 00:21:42 Not just on the fly. Because those are two different answers apparently. I think if he was hungry? Not just on the fly. Because those are two different answers, apparently. I think if he was trying to house them, like, just plain hot dog style, I think he could eat 12. Yeah, but I don't think he would eat 12. But he could. Oh, but he could. But that's the thing.
Starting point is 00:21:59 If the shackles were off, like, if we allowed his tail to grow and he and the moon came out, I think seven or eight. I think there would be no stopping him hitting. I think he would hit double digits and then start going, hmm. And then have it. I keep going. No, he would say after three for calories. For calories.
Starting point is 00:22:23 See, but that's what I'm saying. If shackles were off and you could just go for it, I think you're easy hitting double digits. Yeah, I think you're going super sane for sure. Yeah, wow. Okay. Super sane, not hot dogs. Right, right.
Starting point is 00:22:37 Let us know in the comments how many hot dogs the monkey can eat. Former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger lived to be 100 years old and credited his long life to being a workaholic, aversion to exercise, and enjoyment of wiener schnitzel. This would be great news for all the bugs listening to this. However, the only way to truly activate
Starting point is 00:22:58 your continued lifespan is to commit three or more war crimes and get away with all of them to no consequence. Good luck! Hellhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe Philip. Oh yeah, you made it 99, you didn't make it. No, I was so close. He just goes, I remember. And he just talked about this on Face Jam. Yeah, I think it was Prince Philip, he was 99 and it was like, so close. Yeah, he almost lived a full life. That's the guy who says, oh, you know.
Starting point is 00:23:36 That's Andrew Douglas. This was 12 hours ago, I remember. What do you mean? You just told it. I was there. No, it was a week ago. This just happened, okay? That just fucking happened.
Starting point is 00:23:45 Is it on Michael Jordan's podcast? Don't explain it to me? That just fucking happened. Is it on Michael Jordan's podcast? Don't explain it to me like I don't know. Go listen to Michael Jordan's podcast. Commit three or more war crimes. Did you know he was living with Eric for a while and there was a red room in the end to make him angry? It's like this.
Starting point is 00:24:01 It's so red. Making me mad. In March of this year, it's 2024, Wienerschnitzel opened its first location in Idaho in more than 40 years. Residents of Meridian, Idaho lined up for hours to get a taste of the restaurant. One person quoted as saying,
Starting point is 00:24:16 "'Everyone should try it. "'It is the best. "'The best hot dog, chili cheese dog.' And another saying, "'I'm going to go order six chili cheese dogs, "'and I'm really excited about it we should honestly move to Idaho if we showed them an Android phone they'd probably seize and throw up and make us senators like I said I'm on Q mask he's governor now Why did the guy say it is it is the best period?
Starting point is 00:24:49 Cheese dog I am human I'm normally he was like somebody was off-screen going no no no keep going I don't eat hot dog hot dog is good I'm a cat I don't eat hot dog. Hot dog is good. A mechanical bird! The lines were like hours long at the Wiener Schnitzel. It's Idaho, you know? I get it. It's like when In-N-Out opened up here, people were lining up. But at least it was In-N-Out. At least it was good.
Starting point is 00:25:31 I mean, I guess. But what if you hadn't had Wiener's Nitzel in 40 years? Would you go line up and say everyone should try it? It is the best, the best hot dog chili cheese dog. I'm going to go order six chili cheese dogs. And I'm really excited about it. I've been waiting for this day for decades. I told my kids about it when I was, yeah, what happened?
Starting point is 00:25:58 So one closed and then 40 years later. Yeah. So there was, I think it was, uh, Wienerschnitzel had a lot of expansion and then had to close a lot of stores. And now it's expanding again within like the last five years. It's expanding like a lot. Why? Exactly. Why?
Starting point is 00:26:15 Because imagine you keep eating it and it sucks. Imagine that you ate 40 years. 40 years. And this is the Wienerschnitzel. They've come a long way. Macaroni soup. Soup! Yeah, another person was quoted as saying,
Starting point is 00:26:31 I needed some liquids, so I got the mac and cheese. Someone was quoted as, I left my teeth at home and it's no problem. I thirst, macaroni and cheese. The best, macaroni and cheese. The best macaroni and cheese. Okay. Last fact. Last fact.
Starting point is 00:26:51 This is great. In 2019, a Sacramento family sued the Sacramento PD and Wienerschnitzel after their 11 year old son was wrestled to the ground by police and arrest without cause. Before they arrested the boy, police placed a spit mask over his head. One officer said, he is just a little terrorizer, but we assume the boy was just trying to spit out his mac and cheese dog, and the police wouldn't let him. A-Cab.
Starting point is 00:27:16 So we're in space. I looked right when I read that. They put a spit mask on him. Yeah! I'm just, I don't really know what that looks like, but I'm picturing a Hannibal Lecter style. Yeah, it's like a big plastic, it's like putting a plastic bag over someone's head. It's like a dog cone kind of. Yeah, so he couldn't spit out the food.
Starting point is 00:27:41 Yeah, they wanted him to eat the rest of his soup. He was spitting it out. It was just liquid so he went I want this a little terrorizer That's a cop said that he's a little terrorizer. Yeah, we put that spit mask on him. All right on that Where'd that lawsuit go though? Oh Settle that a court. I imagine yeah, it was uh, I don't want to arrest. Oh imagine though. I want to know. Mm-hmm It's true. Is that on the back? Nick? We'll look it up Texas Pete, well, those are all the facts. Yep. Yep How many hot dogs do you think you could eat?
Starting point is 00:28:17 You know, I was I was also just thinking about the 999 challenge. Yeah go to a ballgame 90 things 9 beers 9 hot dogs. I there's no a ball game. Nine innings, nine beers, nine hot dogs. There's no way I could do it. I couldn't. Stop. I'm looking over this one. Because because because because we. I think I could do I could do I could do five. I think five. I would hit five and I'd probably hit a wall.
Starting point is 00:28:40 I could probably push through for like two more. But like, that's just so fucking much. Do you have to look at Nick that way no he has to look at you even when he's looking this way I want to take a picture I what do you think though like last time I went to dollar hot dog night I ate six and didn't try it was like yeah it really depends situation dude if I happen to like exercise and then go find hot dogs, I could eat 10. The ones at the ballpark on dollar hot dog night? They're like this size.
Starting point is 00:29:10 They're like Winger Stancil size. They just come plain. They're maybe a little smaller, I think. But like, they're easily digestible. I put like jalapeno stuff and onions and what, like, oh yeah, dress it up and then you just. And then you go and then you know, it's like when I eat an entire Domino's pizza and it just slides
Starting point is 00:29:28 down. Yeah, you didn't mean to. It's just Yeah, that's just the way it happens. Right? Yeah, you tripped and it all. It's it's what we were saying about this food. There's no give like there's no like it's fight dude back. The sloppy soup bowls. It's all mush through and through. How? Just like there's not, and it feels wrong. It's like I went, I did just for funsies,
Starting point is 00:29:51 it was a couple of years ago, but I did one of those like, not smoothie diets, but it's like, oh, you just drink this liquid for three days. Yeah, sure, sure, sure. Like a juice cleanse. A juice cleanse. I did it just for funsies. And I added the like, cause it all sucks, sure. Sure. Like a juice cleanse. Oh, yeah. A juice cleanse. I did it just for funsies.
Starting point is 00:30:07 And I added the like, because it all it all sucks. It's gross. But then you can add like, this is the almond one. Like if you hate your life, this one tastes a little bit good. I was totally fine with like being hungry and like a lot of shit. It was just like it was I wasn't hungry or whatever. Day three, I was just like, I need to fucking chew something. Yeah, right. I, a human being needs to chew. That's this.
Starting point is 00:30:25 And I'm just like, every time I would eat a couple bites, I would eat a popper just so I could bite something. Yeah, just so you could feel something. Because the burger is fucking disgusting. The burger is the worst thing ever. It's awful. It would still be awful. This wouldn't change anything, but it also pisses me off
Starting point is 00:30:42 because they do like, oh, it's a mac and cheese burger, but they don't put cheese on it also. No, it should have cheese and the mac and cheese. Fuck you. Put a piece of cheese on it and then put the mac and cheese. Just because it's like it's not it doesn't cover the entire burger. Immediately I bite it and I go, that's dry burger. There's no cheese. And then you get some of the macronutrients. Fuck you. If you're going to do a macaroni and cheese burger, you put regular cheese on it as well. That aside, it's disgusting.
Starting point is 00:31:03 I also think that the burger sucked because of the stuff that was on the burger. It's all bad, dude. Like meat sucks. The burger itself sucks. The meat is shit. It's fucking terrible. I've never even had a burger from Wiener Schitzel. If that was a chili mac and cheese burger, I think there would be, I don't think it'd be hammering it as hard.
Starting point is 00:31:21 I think everything on the burger tasted bad. Like nothing tasted good on it. It was like, here's a lot of mustard. Oh, okay. In mac and cheese. Yeah, they sure did. What? Yeah, plus there's pickles.
Starting point is 00:31:34 And the pickles. Like this isn't, none of this goes. They're not thinking, they're just doing. Like if they would have done that with a slice of cheese, with chili, the macaroni and cheese, some onions or something, you know, have like a burger sort of like thing near it. Great. Then at least it's close. That sucks. It's a bunch of sad shit. It really is terrible. I was checking to see if there was some sort of like chef or something in the press material. There's no press material. They got no name. Yeah, there's no press material for this. They named a new chief development officer and he didn't talk about this. He didn't like.
Starting point is 00:32:09 Not his baby. No, he's just like, mm-mm. They just hired me. I have anything to do with this. I'm just learning about this. It looks like that. I've only just found out it's called Texas Pete. I don't know anything about what this is.
Starting point is 00:32:19 What's Nick? Yeah, it's a trash can in it. Oh, nice. I fixed it. You fixed it. All right, hey, let's a trash can in it. Oh nice. I fixed it. You fixed it. It's good. All right, hey, let's learn about the food. Where can I get that sweater?
Starting point is 00:32:30 Framerateworkshopcom? Just take that one. It's literally sitting there. Just say the UPS guy stole it. You can enjoy Mac and cheese on its own in three types. Classic Mac, chili cheese Mac, and the new barbecue bacon Mac Jordan's favorite Everyone's favorite that was fucked Mac dogs. Yep a hot dog with mac and cheese on top
Starting point is 00:32:53 This is the Garfield shit From last week was on yesterday was on you and some other stuff Same guy wrote let me get a Mac dog. This is like Eric writing. No, no, no. Chili. There's no typos yet. Can I get a chili Mac dog?
Starting point is 00:33:11 What's that? It's a chili dog also topped with mac and cheese. Wow. Well, that's the food. I'm more angry. There's more. Don't worry. There's one more.
Starting point is 00:33:21 There's one more. They innovated upon Mac burger. I want a Mac burger. What is it? It's a hamburger with mustard, ketchup, pickles, grilled onions and mac and cheese. That's the problem. It's not even they know it's not even a cheeseburger. Yeah, hamburger.
Starting point is 00:33:33 It's true. Hamburgers should be eradicated. Yeah. Stop selling hamburgers. Right. Default should be cheese. Yeah. The idea that they just went hamburger, put mac and cheese on hamburger.
Starting point is 00:33:43 Don't worry about other toppings. Ketchup and mustard. That's that's the screams that we needed a third thing. That is so close to being the slop. It's got it has like it's got some ketchup in it. I mean, ketchup is there and he's got macaroni and cheese, some mashed potatoes, mashed potatoes. That would be it. Right.
Starting point is 00:34:01 Like, I don't know, man. That's pretty fucking crazy. Slot burger. I like it. I had never had their burgers and I took a bite and was like, this tastes like every it tastes like a ballpark burger or like an elementary school burger like it's cafeteria food. I've said this before and it's the worst thing they have at Sonic is the burger. I only get like the apps are great. That's worse than Sonic.
Starting point is 00:34:22 Oh, I totally agree. That's probably the worst burger I've ever had. I mean, it's really down. Hey, I don't wanna like jump the gun, but you know, I just wanna do this real quick cause you wrote these, you reviews. Let me just read the first one real quick. Chelsea B, it upset my stomach
Starting point is 00:34:35 and gave me the schnitzely shits. I would never go there again. That's it, that's the review. Oh man, I hope I don't get this shit. I mean, what? But what were you eating though? That really has nothing to do with the quality of the food. Right. No shit.
Starting point is 00:34:53 It gave me this schnitzel. This is this. It's look what you're fucking eating. This food is like what you ordered. This is like anti fiber. Like this, this, like this, this, this like willfully like absorbs fiber from your body to like take it away from you. If you're constipated, this is like, this is fucked up.
Starting point is 00:35:15 Can you believe it upset Chelsea's stomach? The snitzely shit. Mark G says, like the guy who took my order today, I too was once a shift leader at a fast food joint back when I quote, took a semester off to focus on the focus on the band. Okay. I know the position doesn't come with the kind of pay to magically transform one into the quote, the world's top gregarious hot dog evangelist. But between his bumbling vacant manner and the absence of even the slightest pleasantry I found myself almost too depressed to eat by the time I got my change in receipt
Starting point is 00:35:52 Maybe the zombie like customer service spoiled my mood sounds like it But my chili cheese dog just didn't taste like the decadent indulgence. I remembered it being Given the level of enthusiasm. I encountered today. I can't help but wonder why they bothered reopening this location shrug. All right. If you're first of all, that was before the decadent indulgence. Uh huh. You're going to get, you're going to get your mood ruined and be too depressed to eat by the attitude of the fast food worker. That's a dude. I don't even, I can't even, I can't even wrap my head around that. I do. And I was so excited until this fast food worker. That's a dude. I don't even I can't even I can't wrap my head around that. Dude, I was so excited until this fast food employee
Starting point is 00:36:27 wasn't smile. Didn't why would my fucking food? Why wasn't he high fiving me as I ordered my wiener? Yeah, man. Weiner's welcome. This this strikes me as what I am the most fucking Gen X guy in the world. Like, yeah, I took a semester off to focus on the band. The world's top gregarious hot dog evangelist, Tips Fedora. Yeah, this is the funniest guy he knows. Yes, and then at the end, shrug. He wrote that and then sent it to people.
Starting point is 00:36:57 Hey, look what I wrote about Wiener Schnitzel on Yelp. Dude, it's such a shame his movie review website didn't catch on. Fuck! Yeah, it's such a shame his movie review website didn't. You know that he's a bartender somewhere here in Austin. 100%. I think I saw him at Silver Medal. Absolutely. Dude, Mark G. Come on, dude. I'll do Alexa. You want Alexa? Go for it. For starters, it's not hard to make hot dogs and corn dogs. My dog can make them better than the people who work there.
Starting point is 00:37:28 Not only did they not put the lid on right, causing my drink to spill all over me and my brand new 2022 car, I also asked for cheese on my hot dog and they messed it up the first time by not putting cheese. So I went back and they literally just slapped a piece of American cheese on it. How idiotic do you have to be to work here?
Starting point is 00:37:47 Absolutely horrible. No wonder nobody goes here anymore. Negative 10 out of 10. Do not recommend to anybody. Wouldn't even feed this to my dog. Who she mentioned could work there. That's why I picked this one. I like that the dog gets mentioned twice.
Starting point is 00:38:02 She forgot that she had the line at the top about the dog. And she went, gotta talk about my dog in here somewhere. Throw it in here. Negative 10 out of 10, dude. They slapped a piece of American cheese on it. How do you think they would make it if it came like that? That's how they make it. What did she think it was?
Starting point is 00:38:20 That's, when you pour cheese, it's on the pictures that you took of the building. It's just slapped on. Yeah, it's shit. That's what they offer. That's where you were. Where's the cheddar? It's on the pictures that you took of the building. It's just slapped on. Yeah, it's shit. That's what they offer. That's what you're buying. I don't understand. When I went back and I told them I wanted cheese
Starting point is 00:38:31 and they didn't put it on there, they did not hand cut the Havarti to put on the hot dog. They simply slapped the American cheese on. I could also see if it was like, it should be a cheese sauce and they did not give you the cheese. That's how they sell it. That's what's in the pictures.
Starting point is 00:38:45 Yes. It's you're going to Wienerschnitzel. It sucks. Going to Wienerschnitzel. It's not the decadence indulgence you remember. I'm sorry. Yeah. It's it sucks.
Starting point is 00:38:55 It's a puts a writer review about it. It's fucking by the way, did you hear about her brand new 2022 car? Oh, dude. Oh, yeah. The one that's covered in soda. Oh, fucking ruined the her dog could look's covered in soda? Ah! Fucking ruined. The...
Starting point is 00:39:06 Her dog could lick it up. Yeah, my dog could put a lid on better. My dog didn't need a lid, wouldn't spill it. My dog drives better than me. This lady's got two things going for her. New car, got a dog. She wants everyone to know about it. 2022. Hey, last review, my favorite one.
Starting point is 00:39:26 The manager on duty made fun of me for the size of my order. Nice way to represent your company and make your customers feel welcome. That's pretty funny. That's the whole review. What do you think he said to him? Can I get a large combo? I bet that he ordered quite a bit and the guy went,
Starting point is 00:39:48 wow, that's a lot. Really? I bet it was that. Maybe he said, wow, that's all. I bet it was something flat, like, wow, that's a lot. Something like that. Yeah. And the guy went, what?
Starting point is 00:39:58 Yelp will be hearing about this. But also if the fast food worker was commenting about my order, I would be like, this sucks, shut up. Yeah, I don't want to be here. I'm not going to write a Yelp review about going to Weeders. It bothered him a lot. Honestly, that's telling on yourself. That's not, don't do that.
Starting point is 00:40:22 So I don't get it. Like one guy doesn't get enough from the guy taking the order. This guy gets too much. Like you can't please everybody. Can't win. It's tough. Can't please everybody. It's tough.
Starting point is 00:40:34 And at Wienerschnitzel you can sometimes just please no one. Yeah. Right. Just go that route. Yeah. I can't please everybody. Don't try. Here's some soup. At the end of the day, yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:43 When this is what you're eating. Here's soup. It's just end of the day, yeah, when this is what you're eating, here's soup. It's just going to make your day worse. When we were at Wienerschnitzel, there was one guy sitting along the wall where the windows were. And then across the little aisle from him, there was a guy with a beard. And he was sitting and eating his lunch.
Starting point is 00:40:58 And I looked away for a second. And I looked. It felt like it was, I mean, five seconds. And I looked back. And it was a different man. And I thought, I'm like, one of two things happened. It was not only five seconds or the matrix is falling apart. And we are having, it's like, there's some kind of like
Starting point is 00:41:17 dimensional rift inside the wiener schnitzel on breaker. I, because I never saw who I never I never saw him get up and leave. No one walked in or out of the door. It was just simply a like it's a different man. Maybe he shaved real fast. Maybe maybe I was looking at him and he went, I'm about to fuck this guy up. And then he's going back to eating his hot dog and like looking at me like, hmm.
Starting point is 00:41:46 Maybe you turned and you're like, oh my God, that's a different guy. I can't even, he'd have, oh no, it's the wrong bae's over there. Maybe he's just like one booth over. Maybe he's an agent in whatever our Matrix program is. Like, so he just did the thing and changed really quick. But then didn't do anything,
Starting point is 00:42:04 he just went back to eating. He's like, I'd like to be in this. Yeah. And he wasn't even an agent. He just had some macaroni and cheese and he started fucking shaking the barbecue sauce. This is definitely the matrix. It was burning his face and he swallowed it. He was burning his throat and he was coughing it up and he was choking on it. And then his throat was closing from the mac and cheese. I hope people watched it because
Starting point is 00:42:42 after we talked about it Jordan just went how how many rates could you step on? That was how I was cracking up all night thinking about that. Thinking about side show. Episode three. Episode three. I'm telling you, it's so good. We're still laughing at it in episode four. I'm glad it's a weekly show now. We're catching residuals. We don't have to wait two weeks for it. No, no. We're still riding high off the strength of the last episode.
Starting point is 00:43:09 Man, we don't have to do this one. Jesus Christ. All right, let's review this. So before we get to scores and everything, let's talk about, I don't know, we don't need to break them all individually down or whatever. But the regular mac and cheese is fucked. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:22 The chili mac and cheese at least had a chili flavor to it. It was also not good. It also wasn't good. And when we opened it up, it had like melted into a film. Yeah. Like a plastic film to the point where it just looked like, Yeah, you gotta stir it a little bit. I called it Sims food.
Starting point is 00:43:37 Like it was a JPEG of food because it just looked like it was one thing. It was weird because Nick was eating it like this. Right. And he got up and danced. And he went, yabba gabba. look like it was one thing. It was weird because Nick was eating like this. And he got up and danced. And he went, yabba gadabba. That's just him. Texas Pete. The house on fire.
Starting point is 00:43:55 Texas Pete. Visited by the Grim Reaper. Yeah, we removed all the doors. That's what you gotta do, dude. I got a scoop out of the chili mac and cheese, and I was kind of like tapping it so that way it wouldn't drip. And Michael just started going, stop it, stop doing that. Well, he's like, I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it, and then I'm gonna tap it and he's like, I'm not gonna drip. I'm like, it's always gonna drip. You'll be stuck here forever. He did it like five times. He just kept going. So that's the regular mac and cheese
Starting point is 00:44:31 and the chili mac and cheese, but we need to like have some special attention on the barbecue mac and cheese. I saw the picture of it outside and I was like, I don't even know what the fuck this is looking at it. I could not tell. I did not think in a million years it would be barbecue bacon.
Starting point is 00:44:48 I just, I thought maybe they threw some, some maybe some hot dogs in it or bacon. And it was worse than I could have imagined. That is by far the worst thing on this menu. And the barbecue sauce is way too sweet. Why are there so many onions? Is there an onion? What was that?
Starting point is 00:45:08 They're trying to get rid of it was mostly like the onion was the base. Yeah, yeah. They started with the onions. They did. There was a lot. I like onions. There was a lot of onions. It was the first thing Michael looked at it, tried it and just went, it's a lot. I didn't know what I was getting into.
Starting point is 00:45:24 I just dove into that one and just went, whoa. Yeah, Jordan immediately started having a lot. I don't know what I was getting into. I just dove into that one and just went, whoa. Yeah, Jordan immediately started having a reaction. I would still say the hamburger is worse. Yeah. Oh, I agree. But but the thing about the barbecue mac and cheese, the sweetness is it's it's like sickening. Yeah, it's awful. It is the sweetest barbecue flavor,
Starting point is 00:45:46 but it's mac and cheese and there's no... I almost want to try the... You're just going... Right. That's it. That's it. That's everything in these bowls. Right.
Starting point is 00:45:55 You just swallow it. That's what I did when I took a bite of just the mac and cheese hot dog. It was just like, there's no flavor. Yeah. It's just texture. The texture is bad. It really is like eating the hot dog and like the burger,
Starting point is 00:46:09 at least there's like a bite and you have to chew. This mac and cheese, you like, if you bite, your teeth just touch. Like there's no, you're not, where's the food? You're not ripping and tearing. It is just sort of going like, let me get out of the way for you.
Starting point is 00:46:25 Food for herbivores. Yeah. Yeah, that is food for that's a sloth would eat that. That's for not for Doomslayer. No, but my. Yeah, this is whole thing. Yeah. Yeah. If your if your teeth are straight and not pointy, if you have if you're a brontosaurus, check out Weiner's Sizzles, Mac and Cheese.
Starting point is 00:46:43 You could you could even in this container, pour this at, Mac and cheese. You could, you could even in this container, pour this at an angle and slurp and eat. Oh, yeah. You could just go, that's all. And Nick's going to do it right now. So the regular Mac hot dog, why even make that? So I open the chili one first, and then you handed me the regular one.
Starting point is 00:47:04 And I open it, I go, what's different? Yeah, I think that one's mine because I didn't bite that one yet. And by the end of eating it, I opened it and I said, I have eaten this six different ways. Yes. Yes. I don't even need to bite this. It's between the slop soup and the burger and the other chili dog. I mean, I was just like, I didn't. I've eaten this.
Starting point is 00:47:22 Nothing will be gained for me to know. Bite of this tastes like just put it on display. It really does taste like it tastes like nothing. At least the chili cheese version of that you get their chili. It has it, which look, man, it had there's a taste to that chili where I just where I just go. It's fine. It's fire in the right, the right little exactly that I enjoy. It's like it's like the Burger King program. See, I don't have that.
Starting point is 00:47:45 Exactly. But I but it's still I have like there's taste. Yes. Yep. It's chili. There's there's taste and flavor. The hot dog is just hot dog. But this was the mac and cheese is shit tier mac and cheese.
Starting point is 00:47:57 Like like like fucking Kraft macaroni and cheese is a thousand times better than that. Just making it at home. The little instant cups. That's better than that. That is you said it many times. That is cafeteria food. Yeah, it's just, it's macaroni and cheese and it just somehow has no taste. And it's combined with a hot dog that has no taste. And then the chili's like, I'm tasting something. Right. Yeah. I'm tasting something. But this is also-
Starting point is 00:48:17 It's not sweet. Yeah. This was the first time that I've eaten at Wiener's Ditzel and I've had that chili and I was like, oh no. yeah, maybe this maybe this isn't good. Yeah, like the the deep program indulgence. Yeah, it's fading. It's not like it used to be. It's not like I'm not going to say I'm the world's top gregarious hot dog evangelist, but no, but I would say it about you. I think the yeah, yeah, I mean, the chili cheese dog was the best thing here.
Starting point is 00:48:43 Yeah, I agree. The I want to talk about it. Dude, if they if you take that and like just scoop all the mac and cheese off, that's pretty good. Yeah, it's a chili cheese dog. It's great. Yeah, that would be great. Yeah, chili chili cheese dog.
Starting point is 00:48:54 We're just great. Get that the hamburger. But then they'd be no cheese. You took off the mac and cheese. It's like the macaroni. What are you gonna do? Just slap a piece of American on it. My dog could do that. A Dog makes better cheese for cows.
Starting point is 00:49:10 How to the the hamburger shouldn't exist. No, dude. Why? It's it's fucking horrible. It's dry. It tastes like shit. It's a food crime. Yeah, it's like I can't believe I can't believe that came from a national fast food chain. Yeah. Yeah, I agree. That is fucking horrible. It's a food crime. Yeah, it's like I believe I can't believe that came from a national fast food chain Yeah, yeah, I agree. That is fucking horrible. It's embarrassing. It's like we you ordered it and got it and it Tastes like it's a week old. Yeah And looking at it. It's like aging before our eyes like the bun is like getting ready for college Well, it's been it's been hanging out on the beach that ages you.
Starting point is 00:49:45 So. Oh. He's been hanging out on an aged beach. So now it's. It didn't get the cure. No. Damn dude. Yep. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:49:53 Sorry. This food is. Where's the twist? That's it. The twist is you have to eat the rest of it. So that's all the food that we got. I would say the best thing that we got was jalapeno poppers. They were okay as well.
Starting point is 00:50:08 I went to them for refuge. Yeah, as a little, but enough. It was the Mac chili cheese dog. Yep. Comparably the poppers, which still were too soft. Yep. They weren't fried enough, but there was still texture and flavor. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:24 Oh, you know what? You know what? I actually ended up what I ended up really liking was Michael soda. Dude, yours was pretty good too. Yeah. That's so maybe maybe the best thing we got was sharing soda. I'll say this too. I was going to get sprite at the soda fountain and Michael filled up some he was getting coke and he took a drink. He goes, Oh, that's good. This is like a good mix. It's a good mix because it makes it sometimes your shit. I was like, and you said, this is good. And I, Oh, that's good. This is like a good mix. It's a good mix because it makes it sometimes your shit.
Starting point is 00:50:46 I was like, and you said this is good. And I was like, well, cool. So I went over to the Coke. I will say that was really good. It tasted like it. What did you think about the can? The oh, the three or four times that I had it, I thought I was really good. Yeah, dude, it's hard to get can flavor Coke in a soda fountain. A lot of people don't do it right. Think back on it now.
Starting point is 00:51:01 Probably the best thing we are still did today. I agree. That's soda fountain. I think you're right. Yep. So Jordan out, probably the best thing Wienerschnitzel did today. Yeah, I agree. I agree. I think you're right. Yup, so Jordan, what would you give the Wienerschnitzel, Wienerschnitzel on a whole, but also the mac and cheese menu is really what we're focusing on here. The whole, yeah. This whole menu.
Starting point is 00:51:19 Like, I like Wienerschnitzel. It was also $87. It was everything you're saying here was $87. It was a lot. Compared to Olive Garden. I mean, and that was before $87. For the- It was everything you're saying here was $87. It was a lot. Compared to Olive Garden. I mean, and that was before I went and bought the drinks. Yup. So that's another 11 bucks.
Starting point is 00:51:30 Oh, so it was 98 bucks. Wow. It's almost $100. I like- Olive Garden was like $120. $130? Yeah. I like Weiner Schnitzel.
Starting point is 00:51:38 I'll defend it, but I know I'll also acknowledge that's bias, childhood bias. I'm rating this menu, this is 5%. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. He really fucking hates it. Now, and here's the thing. Wow. Literal slop.
Starting point is 00:51:55 As we were eating it, Jordan just went, I won't need anything conditional for this one. This is- Yeah, he did say that. Yeah. He did say that. Yeah, he said nothing- I knew it was gonna be low. Nothing conditional here. You know, okay. When the first thing we do is open it and it's that mac and cheese. It was stunning.
Starting point is 00:52:11 It was really bad. That was bad and that open and I was like one. And then you and then you ate the barbecue and you could not get over that. You were like righteous fury. There was a real someone needs to pay for this. Yes, it's punishment territory. It was bad. You immediately to pay for this. Yes, it's punishment territory. It was, you immediately started campaigning against it. Honestly, honestly. As soon as it tasted your lips. Troubling.
Starting point is 00:52:30 Oh, it is pretty troubling. Troubling. Um, alright, so five. Tamarum. Seventeen? Seventeen percent. Wow. Five's crazy.
Starting point is 00:52:41 Seventeen's not good. Okay. That's an average score of eleven. Yeah. That's pretty bad. Yeah. Pretty bad. That's pretty. 17 is not good. Okay. That's an average score of 11. Yeah, that's pretty bad. Yeah. Pretty bad. That's pretty, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:48 The mac and chili cheese dog was okay. It like, and again, that's the- It was not enough to save it. Like, even if I took that into account, it's a five. The thing that we said about this too was if instead of macaroni, this whole thing was french fries. Oh, this would be this would be fucking up because the barbecue would still suck. It was chili, chili cheese fries. Great. Yeah. And like, and then you put them on the burger and you do some
Starting point is 00:53:15 kind of chili dude in the hot dog cheese hot dog. That like there's something there that's winner's nitzel. There's just nothing. The macaroni is just it's like wet. There's nothing. Who wanted mac and cheese? Yeah. Wintersnitzel anyway. Like what do we do with it? Oh, no, it's fucked up. It's an average score of 11. The new development guy needs to fix this. Yeah, I agree. He better fucking do something. It may not have been his creation, but it is his problem. Yeah, it's his is his
Starting point is 00:53:40 responsibility. You've been handed a burden. Yeah, fix it or put it down. Hey, let's get to some business. 100% fan shout out. Oh, now you're here. Oh, great. Fantastic. This is from Evan Justo. See it's and he has a pronunciation for how, because we, because the way he spells his name, we never would have guessed. That's cool. Yeah, it's, it doesn't matter what it is. He said it right. guest. That's cool. Yeah, it's doesn't matter what it is. He said it right. Yeah. Uh, this is a general message. It says I'm a whale and I know it. Please live on face jam and or
Starting point is 00:54:14 100% eat. We got you. Thank you. You got you. You got us. Nick didn't understand the whale comment. He got it. He got it. He went, what's the point? What is a whale? Think about it. That's Evan. Thank you. Evan. Phenomenal. 100% fan. 100% fan. Yeah. That now that any more fan person and now and at the point of us recording this, we still don't know what's going on with Chris and his psycho wife eating pizza and what she does. And last week's I'm excited to find out. Go back to last week's episode.
Starting point is 00:54:45 If you dare. Rewatch it. Rewatch the whole thing. I dare. Dude, people have been looping it 24 seven until the new one drops. It's looping in my mind forever. You want to know how you can help us?
Starting point is 00:54:56 Just put it on repeat, baby. Just more. Watch it on YouTube over and over and over again. Oh man, we're going to find out what that guy's wife does about pizza. But Evan, thank you. You are a whale and we will live on with your help. No harpoons for Evan. Hopefully we see you in the uh, there's a special on Discord. We have a special 100%. We have a special 100% fans Discord. It is a, it's a secret club. It's like a little manatee.
Starting point is 00:55:23 Yes. Oh, big time. oh we should get robes. Oh Okay, okay now we're talking Yeah, we're in a cult like associated with right no, no? No. No, it's totally different. Is that who that is? Yeah. Ha ha ha. Jordan, hand me that. Oh. Now I see it.
Starting point is 00:55:55 He looks so different now. He got smaller. I couldn't tell. Ha ha ha. He's a little guy. Been here the whole time. You got to get a magnet for him. Yep.
Starting point is 00:56:02 Have a little Ray shoulder magnet. Oh, dude. Ha ha ha. Little shoulder Ray. magnet for him. Yep. Have a little ray shoulder. Little shoulder ray. That's great. He says let's play and it's legally allowed. It's okay. Oh, let's play. See, it works. It was pretty cool. It was longer than that. Oh yeah, that's true. Hey, check out the Michael Jordan podcast coming out this Friday, we're about to record it. What could it be? I guess we'll find out.
Starting point is 00:56:31 It'll be on- We're not doing it today, dude. I'll kill you, I'll beat you today. Why, what do you mean? We're doing it today. I'll beat you today. Why not? Are you serious?
Starting point is 00:56:38 It'll be for why not? Are you serious? Because you booked me till two and it's already 1.35 and it's a 30 minute drive back to my car and then I gotta drive another 25 minutes to my house. Ha ha ha. Guys, check out Michael Jordan podcast on Friday. Where will it be recorded at?
Starting point is 00:56:53 I'm excited to find out. You can sign up at patreon.com slash 100% eat or go to 100% eat dot com. Hopefully that's working the right way. By this point, I am hoping we talk about it here a little bit. I am hoping that we will maybe have our merch out at this point. That is what I'm hoping for. So the way I think we're probably going to handle merch is do
Starting point is 00:57:19 a limited number of designs because we don't want to just here's everything like we own everything. We're not going to do everything. Exactly. We should. Eventually- We should do everything right now. Put ourselves in a hole.
Starting point is 00:57:30 Oh! Oh! Eventually we'll have some new designs. We'll have some old designs that are coming back. There's just a lot of stuff that we have the option for. And I'm really excited with what we can do with our merch and everything. We're doing a men's cut, like the un unisex tee and women's cut for a tee.
Starting point is 00:57:48 Yep. And options and maybe a little embroidery kind of situation that yeah, I'm really excited about. There's a lot going on. That's gonna be really cool. You can stay up to date with all of that on our Patreon where we post everything. You use it like a great little website and you can follow at 100% to get the app. It is every most things are an app. You can follow at 100% eat on Twitter and Instagram to stay up to date with everything. And if you
Starting point is 00:58:13 want to you can send us something to our PO box. That's PO box 14 3241 Austin, Texas, 78714 PO box 143241 Austin, Texas 78714. Go down to the description, click that survey link. We're almost done with it now, I think. It only has to be like a certain number of weeks because they were just trying to collect the demographic information and then they go, Oh, these people want pluffles. And then we, oh, these people are freaks. And then we try to team up with pluffle.
Starting point is 00:58:44 Yeah, Gracie was freaking out about Pluffle. We said, oh, man, we have like an idea. We want to work with Pluffle and then they call you back. And they call you. What? Who? It's how many? When are they getting here?
Starting point is 00:58:54 An hour later. Yeah. So when are you going to hear back from Pluffle? Yeah, she was like a wall in the conversation. She was like, so when are when are they going to get back to us? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah are, when are they going to get back to us? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Us. Yeah. Exactly. There's also a video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel that you
Starting point is 00:59:11 can go check out, leave a comment. But the thing I want to show off in the video version is this is a shit face jam, 100% soft data pillow that Madison S made. This is from last year. It has color coded. These aren't just random. These are color coded by score. It's a data pillow.
Starting point is 00:59:33 Yes. Holy shit. And on the back, there is a QR code. Yep. And then this'll show like how the data is broken down. Holy shit. I think there's like a big old article she wrote about it. And it's like really interesting. It's fucking it's really cool.
Starting point is 00:59:47 And I wanted to bring it here. Madison is like, absolutely. We're like scared. And it was like a comfort pillow. Like downstairs talking to your dog. You hold the pillow in the middle of the night and you're like, the dog needed me. And he's like, but now it's cool.
Starting point is 01:00:01 Yeah, that's what I thought. Oh, he made me come downstairs. Come on, dog. Yeah. So it's where we are. We have all the data and then and that's fucking cool. And so the other thing that Madison is working on right now is a scarf that is showing the same data. She was now she's got a complete set because face jams over.
Starting point is 01:00:19 Yep. And she was like, oh, this is great, because now I can move on to 100 percent eat and do like that data set. And so she's really excited. This is really great. And it has all of our letters. Isn't that cool? We've had this great. We've had this for a while, but I really want to show it off now that we're doing like video version and all this stuff.
Starting point is 01:00:36 I want people to see what Madison Madison also made a face jam connections puzzle. Oh, yeah, there was there was a connections puzzle that was face jam themed. She made one of and I sent it to Jordan and Nick and Gracie. It was in the puzzle slack. And Jordan was like, oh, this is great. Oh, this is so cool.
Starting point is 01:00:56 And Gracie went, I didn't get any of these. Listen to the product, Gracie, what the fuck? So if you like puzzles, come to our Discord and post your Wurl scores. That was you posting in the puzzles Discord. I'm at Olive Garden and I'm pissed. Oh yeah. You got it, right? Yeah, six. Yeah, but it was bullshit. But that's all the business for this one. It's nicer. Fuck you. Thank you, Madison. Patreon.com slash 100%
Starting point is 01:01:30 Eat. Appreciate it. All right. Thank you, everyone. Please rate, subscribe, tell a friend about the show where we eat the food and rate the food. Sometimes it doesn't need to be eaten. Sometimes it just goes right down. Yeah. Bye. Damn it. Wow. That was awful. And I threw it with my right hand. Yours was horrible. I'm awful. And I threw it with my right hand. Yours was horrible. I'm left handed.
Starting point is 01:01:47 I threw it with my right hand too. I'm left handed. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too.
Starting point is 01:01:54 I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too.
Starting point is 01:02:01 I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too.
Starting point is 01:02:08 I threw it with my right hand too. I threw it with my right hand too.

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