100% Eat - Wingstop Secret Invasion Wings
Episode Date: July 4, 2023In this episode, Michael Jones and Jordan Cwierz eat and review Wingstop Secret Invasion Wings so you know if it's worth eating. They also talk about what they wish, Wingularity, a diamond episode, an...d a toast to hustlers. Sponsored by DoorDash Download the DoorDash App and used code NOBUGSSUMMMER Shady Rays http://shadyrays.com and RTX http://rtxaustin.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey, welcome to Face Jam, the show where we try every new fast food creation to let you know if you need it.
You probably do. I'm your classic host, Michael Jones, alongside my also classic host, Jordan Sweers.
Jordan, how are you?
Hearing double intro, apparently.
Actually, we were just hearing the one.
Right, yeah. I didn't forget I wasn't wearing
headphones. Why can't I hear it?
Well, you put them on and then took them off right
before we started the show. Yeah, because I...
He had to get up and get a drink. No, no, no. He put them on
since he came back. No, he's right.
I put them on and I said, what am I doing this for?
I don't need to. And also, they're terrible headphones.
Yeah. Like, they're absolutely...
I don't wear headphones when we do this.
No, we don't need to. I put him on again just to listen to the intro
And here's the thing
He's shaking his head over there
What you've done in a mere moment
Is far better than what he scrambles to do
Every two weeks or so
He doesn't have a button he just pushes
Sometimes he's gotta bring up another episode
Of the show
And play it through his phone
But now he's at a computer with lots of buttons.
I feel like he should have a million buttons.
But it's still always like, oh, hang on.
He's saying he did it, which to his point.
Is that why we made this?
Well, here's the thing.
He did do it, but just for me personally,
like when I put the headphones back on,
it was so low and drowned out that the one in the room was still better.
Now the only downside is it's a shortened version.
It is.
And it sounds a little compressed.
Well, that's a feature.
What are you talking about?
It's the poster.
It's absolutely.
Hang on.
We got one sample.
Nick is simply holding up a sign that says, I was confused.
We've been posting.
I can't get enough of the picture of him in the mask holding up a sign that says,
I want to read. It is the funniest
fucking thing in the world to me.
Somebody let him. I want to read!
But yeah, we got
for those who can't see because it's not
an audio podcast. You better not be able
to see. Eric is holding the
Face Jam
soundboard? pocket soundboard.
How are we selling this thing?
It's on the cover there.
It's like Face Jam, sound bites, digital, quote, keychain.
Heck yeah.
Those are some good words.
They're certainly in a row.
They're certainly arranged.
Hey, hear it.
Now this thing's going to sell like.
This is new lemons?
Wow, the keychain thing is lemons?
So if you're, you know, if you're a jammer and have been for some time,
you will know for a fact, we just kind of hashed these out in the middle of an episode.
Right.
And said, how about this one?
And then you'll be...
I've been waiting to play that one for you guys.
I have not done it until now.
That is the longest ooh from the monkey. It's so good.
Of all the monkey sounds he's ever done,
that one. And also,
it sounds like he's a cartoon character
falling off of a cliff. Well, check this out.
This sucks.
I like how it's like, this out. This sucks. Yep. So we got it all.
I like how it's like, this sucks.
Let me tell you how
fortuitous it was. The reveal.
Could not have gone any better. The second
I saw the wheels of fate turning,
a smile
just, I wouldn't even say crept
across my face. I'm standing
next to Eric. I was talking
to somebody near the
mail room.
And Eric walks in.
And he walks in, cool guy style.
Walks past us.
That's just how he walks.
Goes like right to the shelf.
Picks up the keychain.
It's like almost showing it off.
Slides it to take it out.
Drops it.
It falls on the floor.
He's just kind of staring at it.
I lean over, pick it up, and push.
This sucks.
And he was just like, no!
It hit the ground, and we
all stood there and just
looked at it, and we were with Tony, and
Tony went, hope it still works.
Because it's the only one.
It's the only one.
You gotta give
that button a good push.
Yeah, It's firm
Right
You don't wanna hit
It's not
Trust me
It's like mechanical enough
You can't
Where it's not like
Oh the digital isn't responding
You can't be doing McMillions by accident
No you gotta really push the center of the button
It's gotta be an intentional McMillions
It's like a car horn
Mmhmm
Yeah
I've several times already like slipped
Like oh this ain't no Xbox controller
Yep
Mmhmm
You need to press with purpose
Mmhmm
To get these classic quotes,
we sort of came up with in an episode
and said, that'll be fine.
Yeah.
And I can't believe we actually made it.
It looks so good.
It's so cool.
The pack almost dropped it again.
No.
Can we make it sound even more compressed
and low quality?
Is that a feature we can add?
I mean, I think we're...
We can probably patch it.
Can you plug your keychain into your Ethernet?
I mean, honestly...
Is it Wi-Fi?
Does it have a USB port you can download the hotfix?
You can take the sounds...
You can take the sounds that we've been playing into this microphone
and through your phone so you're listening to this
and you can just record those from your friend's phone
and then you can...
Yeah, there you go.
Just compress it yourself.
It goes from this sucks to this.
It's great.
That's cool.
Is that out?
I don't think so.
Not yet.
Damn it.
Will it be out soon?
So much runway to nothing.
I know.
I love this thing, though.
I was expecting him to go, yes.
Oh.
But it is progress.
It is something.
We got one.
We have the prototype he dropped.
We had zero yesterday. It's true. We got one. We have the prototype he dropped. We had zero yesterday.
It's true.
And I guess now food time.
Yep.
Yeah, what are we eating?
Today, well, we've eaten it.
Now Zui's reviewing it.
Wing stop, secret invasion wings.
Gotcha.
They're here.
Did you know?
It was a secret.
They secretly invaded your wing stop.
Get invaded.
They couldn't believe it.
I would argue that anything that comes to wing stop
Is a secret invasion to me
Can
Wing stop is not a sit down restaurant
I don't understand where you guys are coming from with that
What does that mean
Nick has assigned this to fucking scrolls
This Looney Tunes
Sort of era that he's in
He loves it
He's getting more attention than ever.
Yeah.
The guy's got a fucking kitchen.
He's screaming on it.
He's doing some fucking Wile E. Coyote shit.
Again.
I'm going to drop him off a cliff.
It's a thing where I think, you know.
Hit the ooh.
Hit the ooh.
It's so long.
It could be a thing where Nick's, you know, kind of going like, man, this is bullshit.
Like, the monkey's famous.
Not me.
I'm putting in the work.
But it's, I think, the opposite. Where he's going, I don't even need this Nick guy. Right. I just be the monkey's famous, not me. I'm putting in the work. But it's, I think the opposite
where he's going,
I don't even need this Nick guy.
Right.
I just be the monkey all the time.
He's reveling in it.
He's agreeing with me
in the background.
Yeah, this is good.
So yeah,
I think he's just like,
I don't know.
How about this sign?
Sign works.
People like the sign.
He's just always trying stuff.
He's innovating.
It's like he's,
he's learning like his papa.
Okay, look,
you people,
people don't remember all the duds
if you just keep going through.
That's true.
But once you get to a monkey mask, people hold on to it forever.
Absolutely.
You just keep going and going.
He's really reinventing himself like he's going to college.
He's like, I'm no longer Nicholas from high school.
My name is Nick.
And I wear this mask.
I'm Monkey Wilder.
Monkey Wilder.
Yeah, he's going to school for seven years.
Oh, he can't read. Monkey Wilder. Yeah, he's going to school for seven years. Oh, he can't read.
He wants to.
Somebody let him.
Tara Reid.
That's a movie!
Boom!
That's pretty fun.
So, Wingstop is a sit-down restaurant.
We all agree.
First of all, I don't even know
the conversation you two are talking about.
When did this take place?
Were you not there?
If I was, I was zoned out.
Oh.
He wasn't.
I will say.
I was not.
He was.
You were not.
Okay.
So first of all, there's a sit down or not argument happening?
I just asked her, are we going to eat the food there?
Because it seems like it's very similar.
Context helps, though.
So he's saying it's not worth it.
No, I'm saying it's not.
No, he's saying you simply don't.
It's a restaurant that you go and pick up the food and leave.
I don't.
Sitting down at a Wingstop is like.
Remember when we walked in and there were no tables and nobody there?
No.
That's right.
I remember that.
Yeah, that's what Eric remembers.
No, there was a restaurant and there was a table right as we walked in with like five people.
Right, but that's like going to a Carl's Jr.
and going like, we're going to eat the Carl's Jr.
It's crazy.
No, it isn't.
It was definitely more of a restaurant.
And look, I know we've done that,
but it was like square tables and chairs.
I don't think it's a sit-down restaurant.
You're crazy.
I don't know anything about the restaurant,
but we were just there.
Did you see it?
I think Eric's definition of sit-down restaurant is
you sit down and a waiter comes up to you
and you order from them.
But at Wingstop, it is counter and then you sit down.
He's eating inside one.
There you go.
I mean, I'm not saying you can't.
I'm saying it's not.
So if you think you can eat inside a Wingstop, tweet it, Eric.
I don't know, man.
Fuck yourself.
Now I'm going to get people who eat at a Wingstop tweeting app.
Yeah, exactly.
Hey, you get four of us right here, man.
Your fate is sealed.
I've eaten inside one.
Great.
Cool.
Great.
That's the barometer.
Do you want a Chex?
No, I think I'm good on Rye Chips.
Thank you.
Well, that's why I said, do you want a Chex?
It's a different thing entirely.
How many times have we been to this restaurant? Does this look like a Rye Chip to you? Or does this look like a Chex? That looks like a Chex. Right. It's why I said, do you want a check? It's a different thing entirely. How many times have we been to this restaurant?
Does this look like a ride ship to you?
Or does this look like a check?
That looks like a check.
Right, it's what I offered.
Yeah.
Yet nobody refused.
No.
Interesting.
Do you have any bagel chips?
Are those the ride chips?
No.
Oh, ride chips are the darker ones and the bagel chips are the lighter ones.
They're gone.
They're in my belly now.
We've eaten here.
We'll learn more about it in the fact section.
We've eaten here for the actual show, but we've also eaten here for Spittin' Silly.
Who are you gesturing to?
God.
Let him know.
God!
We've done this restaurant.
Is Wingstop a thing you guys,
either of you, ever frequent?
No.
Never.
Didn't know there was one so close to us either.
Yeah, because the thing i remember
the thing i remember from last time is that he's a fucking freak about the ranch
you remember that blue cheese sorry he's always is this the best one ever
it's up there it's but it's not the best which one's the best i mean this is
technically up there i'm just number one it's there. It doesn't get more up there than number one.
It's up there.
Which one is the best?
This one.
God damn you.
Well, he doesn't want to play favorites.
He doesn't want to insult the other blue cheeses listening.
They can't hear you.
So just ask him twice.
You don't need to rub their nose in it.
Okay.
Be nice.
Be nice.
Don't fight, kids.
Write Ken's blue cheese. Are they good? Okay. He likes them. Okay. Be nice. Don't fight, kids. Bright tins blue cheese.
Are they good?
Okay, he likes them.
Okay.
Not bad.
Is it up there?
17.
Yeah, it's up there.
I need this banana.
Oh, you got a banana.
I got a banana.
That's fun.
It's green.
Well, it's a little bit green.
Yeah.
Green banana, gross banana.
I'd rather have it be a little more spotted.
Well, I agree, but I'll tell when I bite it.
Okay.
No, it's good.
Okay.
What's it taste like?
Banana.
Whoa.
Tastes like buffalo wild wings.
Is there, are you guys big on wings?
Is wings an incidental food?
It's pretty incidental to me.
I feel that way, yeah.
I feel like there's a set standard of wings that is almost never reached to be good wings like they're out there
and i've had them but i never ever ever expect them and even someone's like they got good wings
they usually don't and more often than not they don't come from places like wingstop or buffalo
wild wings yeah so what i'm saying is like incidental in in the way that like if I'm at a restaurant that doesn't specialize
in it and they have it maybe I'll try
them I am not going to places
like Wingstop on a regular basis
I like watching sports at home
I'm not going to the
Wingstop can you watch sports at the Wingstop
alright
Nick answered so fast
Eric wouldn't know because you don't sit
down I mean if you could go to Wingstop and watch sports,
I'm pretty sure it's a sit-down.
No, they just have the TV on for the cooks.
Yeah.
They don't want to be able to stare through the window.
Just through the kitchen window.
Oh, they got money writing on it.
Yeah, they go, come on, Lions.
He's acting it all out.
Nobody's been looking.
I know.
And he's miming all out nobody's been looking and he's miming
through the fucking window
he never turns off
it's pretty incredible
it's pretty good
you know what
I love season one I like the season we're on
you know what I mean
some people might not like the character arc
I liked it before he was a monkey
well I'm sorry.
He's evolved, literally.
Okay?
He's evolved.
And he continues to do so.
I mean...
He might come back.
Who knows?
He might be a Planet of the Apes situation pretty soon.
Oh, man.
Tune in for episode 300 in 2027 when Nick has replaced me.
Finally. Finally.
Finally.
A Planet of the Apes situation
where he still writes down his shit.
No, he's talking at this point.
He's Dr. Zaius.
Let me ask this.
Boneless, bone in, does it matter to you?
Boneless.
Yeah.
It's because of the 100% eat kind of situation.
Bone full is just so much work
I'm just
I don't care enough
about wings man
I don't care
it's a real
it's a real
hey you a manual guy
or are you an automatic guy
it's like
well I'm not
either
why would I want
more steps
yeah
I want
I want to drive
my fucking car
and get there guy
I guess that makes me
an automatic guy
I'm not out there
rooting for him you know what I mean go I'm going I don't want to drive my fucking car and get there guy i guess that makes me an automatic guy i'm not out there rooting for him you know what i mean go i'm going i don't want to drive manual man i can't
believe you never learned you can't believe it why the fuck would i unless you're a car person
which is still like i get it it's like it's a hobby right this is hard i want to do it that's
fine but like everyone should learn what are you talking we should preface that this is purely an american kind of problem because in europe and i think even in like australia like it's all manual
oh is it manual is just like that's what you learn on that's insane yeah why why wouldn't you do
automatic why i don't understand it's like it's like remember you remember you're looking at me
and asking but i don't have any answers smart guys get them get them you know you think like
100 200 years ago it's man, they had this shit.
And you go, thank God we made new shit.
That new shit is automatic.
Yeah.
Just let it drive.
If you win, I want to risk fucking it up.
I rented a car when I was in Scotland.
The feel!
I had to look so hard for cars that were automatic.
And you got to pay more.
But you know what is worth it?
Not breaking a transmission because you don't know how to do it.
Especially when everything is reversed.
Yeah, that's right.
When you shift, it's on your right-hand side.
I'm left-handed.
And that was like a common thing where like, oh, you're left-handed. that was like a common thing
where like, oh, you're left-handed, you can never drive a stick
imagining doing this
with doing like the H pattern shift
with my left hand is bonkers
to me
it's just one more step that I cannot do
it's weird, that's weird
and that's a fact
it's right here, yeah
I think what you said about I don't care enough about wings
to have a boneless or bone-in
kind of like,
they don't matter.
Right, give me boneless.
You like them more?
No.
No, yeah.
It's all the same.
None of it's going to taste good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right, we're not at the level
of like connoisseur
that like we have to get
the bone-in.
If someone tells me
Or bone-full if you prefer.
If someone tells me
that they're at,
and they're right.
Imagine they're actually right
and they don't talk about it.
This is the best place you got to get the bones.
I'd go, sure.
And I would try it.
I'm at that level.
I'd go, this is great.
I'm certainly capable of it.
I'm not an anti-bone person.
Right.
Okay.
I'm anti-bones.
Yeah?
Yeah.
I'm not, again, I'm not really big into wings or whatever,
but I'd rather just have the chicken nugget and not give a fuck and like i think the
thing for me is that when i'm done eating the wings when i have to look at the chicken graveyard
that i've just created it's sort of like a why have i done this with something i don't even enjoy
like gotcha oh look at like the the havoc i have wrought. To yourself or to the chickens? Well, honestly, frankly, to both.
Because now I don't feel well.
I didn't really want it, and 15 chickens have died.
Right.
But they were already dead before you got them.
Right, but I could curb.
You can't think about it like that.
But I do.
But see, here's the problem.
You can't think about it like that.
You can just think about, like, if everyone did it,
those chickens would be alive.
And you go, no, impossible.
They're going to die no matter what.
And then you're better
right but I can't
I don't have that
bop
bop
it's kind of like
that's
you know
there you go
I'll never be able to do that
but okay
I just look at all the bones
and I go
that was alive
and then that's
really it for me
that's see
that's surprising
coming from you
just because you're a monster
like just flat out that's the just because you're a monster.
Just flat out, that's the punchline.
You're a monster. I could see maybe like, oh no, the bones I've wrought.
He's thinking
about bigger bones. He's got bigger
skeletons he's worried about.
The bigger bones inside you, and how one day
your bones will be
displayed in such a way.
I don't know what he's talking about is going on
with your bones. Once you've died and decayed.
He's gonna put my skeleton up or
something? I knew
someone who like, they would
freak out. Like you couldn't
eat something that had a bone in it near them.
Kind of what you're saying, but like once you see
the bone, they're like, I gotta leave.
Like, oh, can you not order this?
Because this person's coming to dinner and they'll
freak out if they see the bone.
Like, the meat's there and they start sweating
and once it's like, the flesh is gone, the bone
revealed. I didn't peg
this guy for one of them. You got bone phobia?
No, no, no. I don't have a problem with it.
And again, I think
it's the sheer volume.
Because if I eat a steak and it's a bone in,
I don't feel that way. It's fine. Because it's one. But something about these, it's the sheer volume. Because if I eat a steak and it's a bone-in, I don't feel that way.
It's fine.
Because it's one.
So it guarantees it's you psychologically fucking yourself.
The fact that you're like, oh, steak?
I'm going to give a shit.
And then you go, put these chickens.
So many little chickens.
But when I look at 12 bones, I go, I could almost build a chicken out of this.
And that to me is tough.
So give me the boneless.
Give me the boneless and we'll be fine
so to answer it in the most the most straightforward question it's like i i prefer boneless to avoid the
trauma yeah it's your answer it's just chicken answer if bones is a trigger we have to respect
that yeah but they're not in general they're not it's just it's again i think i think it's the number of bones i don't i think
when i get eight plus bones eight plus that's the limit yeah i think if i think if i'm looking at
seven bones nothing i can do about seven bones but if i'm hitting eight it's just there's a
number there where i go too much well and in that case like eating boneless wings you're doing
like a moral imperative.
You're saving those bones.
Well, the chickens are still dead.
I was going to say, I don't think anything's being saved.
You're a hero.
That's great.
That's how they get the chicken. They just like
peel it off of the bones and then
the skeleton chicken
is walking around and he's fine.
Yeah, it grows back.
Like a lizard's tail the chicken's breast continues to go it's pretty incredible it's good stuff it's great stuff have you heard lab grown chicken and yeah
lab grow my meat i don't give a song you, have you heard lab chicken and then you trailed off for a second.
I was like,
who's that by?
I don't know.
That song or what?
I don't know music.
Good name for a band though.
Yeah.
Someone tried to hand me
a baseball card
to you the other day.
Turned it down.
Of you?
This collector's edition.
Of Eric.
Rookie year, baby.
Yeah, I,
you know what?
Didn't even get that close.
Hey, want to,
nope. Just kept walking. I don't even get that close. Hey, want to? Nope.
Just kept walking.
I don't think the offer was real either,
but felt like the turndown was pretty real.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And you went, fuck no.
No, I'm good.
It was just a card.
I don't know why you're so offended.
But look who it is.
It's not even, that's not even, here's the thing.
It's not even my rookie card.
I don't know anything about it.
I know you were thinking
it was his rookie card.
Turns out, Jordan,
it's not.
When I was in little league,
you were racking your brain over it.
My parents paid for that thing
where they put you like
on the cover of like
a fake Sports Illustrated thing
and also you get like
a couple of baseball cards.
What team did you play for?
At that time,
I don't know.
It might have been the Rockies.
I don't remember.
The Mets?
Yeah, the Mets. Santee Rockies? Let't remember. The Mets? Yeah, the Mets.
Santee Rockies?
Let's go, Mets!
Hey, yo!
The Mets!
Is you Piazza?
But they did that, and then I remember when I was a kid,
my friend Andrew came over and saw it
and thought that I was really good at baseball.
Is that kind of where it all started?
That's when you started lying.
You're like, whoa, he thinks I'm better than I am?
How do I keep this going?
Yeah, I've been getting some looks from scouts.
I'm seven.
You ever hear of Mark McGuire?
That's me.
I'm the guy putting the steroids in his ass.
Someone's got to do it.
Someone's got to do it.
He can't reach.
He's too bulky.
Hey, Jordan,
do you have a haiku for this?
I do,
and I'm never ready.
Why?
You'd think I would learn.
I would think he would have been ready
and then kind of like
the haiku went to sleep mode.
Like waiting.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because it's been 20 minutes.
I feel like he's been waiting
for about seven here.
But this has been
almost diamond, I think.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I would say almost diamond.
We're talking about food, but we're getting tangential.
That's what you're coming for, Face Jam.
You know what I mean?
Citrus.
You're also coming for the meta in the middle of the episode review.
That's true.
They dine amongst us.
Monsters hidden in plain sight.
Have we been copied?
Wow.
That rules.
Just so you know, Eric got hard pointed at on the monsters line. site. Have we been copied? Wow. That rules.
Just so you know, Eric got hard pointed at on the monsters line.
You called them a monster earlier and I was just like, perfect.
It really worked out. Excellent.
I was really torn betworn
between monsters
and mutants. Mutants
is, boy, we're really on a
mutants case. You like mutants? Oh, it's good.
Mutants good. It holds. Yeah.
It's good. But that
refers to a different
classification in the Marvel universe.
And I didn't want to cause confusion.
I would have been a little confused.
I'm Wolverine.
He's got three fingers?
Come on. You are.
You are. You're the perfect, well, you could probably
look too big. I think he's like
5'6". Is he? No I think he's like 5'6
Or something
Is he?
No
Eric?
Smaller than 5'6
No Wolverine's like 5'2 or something
Yeah Wolverine's like tiny
He's supposed to be small
Because his name is
Huge Jacked Man
Yeah
Well that makes sense
But why
His name should be
Why did they cast him?
Small
Wrap your head around this
Small scrawny
No because Wolverine's jacked
Small jacked man Wrap your head around this You pull up Okay monster. No, because Wolverine's Jack. Small Jacked Man.
Wrap your head around this.
You pull up X-Men.
Okay.
I'm closing my eyes.
First movie.
Okay, first X-Men.
First movie.
Hugh Jackman.
Yeah, got it.
I'm more ripped than that.
Yeah.
What kind of world is this we're living in?
Maybe you're the Wolverine.
Well, no.
It's just that was 2000s normal people.
Right.
Yeah.
We live in the future now.
They didn't make Hugh Jackman.
It's inflation.
Yeah.
It's inflation.
But I'm just saying, you know, still that in mind. Absurd. Right. Yeah. We live in the future now. They didn't make Hugh Jackman. It's inflation. Yeah. It's inflation. But I'm just saying,
you know,
still that in mind,
absurd.
Yep.
It's when you watch
the first Iron Man
and you go,
today,
why does he look like shit?
Right.
That's why today,
it's fucking Chris Hemsworth.
Yeah.
Chris Evans.
And you just go,
giant man.
Yeah.
You just go,
oh, a 12-pack, huh?
Jesus.
Dude,
do you know about this?
Unattendable.
About the packs?
How is that?
With like the dehydration?
No.
Or just that there are packs?
Of just how many packs you may have as a human.
How do you find?
Do you not find out?
You just got to get them.
It's genetic.
Oh, really?
It doesn't change.
Oh.
It ranges from two to 12.
Oh, wow.
It's not going to be eight.
You don't know.
I think the lowest percent.
I'm working on a one pack.
Bro, that's impossible.
The lowest.
We just said two to two.
There might be like, well, in pairs.
A mutant.
I mean, something probably happened.
I don't know.
But apparently two and 12 are like pretty insanely rare.
Like 2% of the population.
But then it's like that 2% has to get abs.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
That's crazy.
I'm like, how many 12 packpackers out there don't know?
Wow.
12-pack is insanity.
Look up a picture of it.
It's insane.
I don't want to.
There's only one way for me to do it.
I want it.
I'm obsessed with knowing.
Now it's like scrolls.
I'm looking around going, you a 12-pack?
Oh my God.
I'm looking at Nick.
He's shaking his head.
He's a 2-pack.
It was just like 60% of humans have a 6-pack.
Wow. Which is why that's just the thing. Oh, it's crazy. It's 6-pack, I think, like 60% of humans have a six pack. Wow.
Which is why that's just the thing.
Oh, it's crazy.
It's six pack, I think, and then eight, and then four or something.
I got at least four just by feeling my tum tum.
I had no idea.
I mean, yeah, they're in there.
You're pretty sleek.
So you can get in there.
I'm like just enough.
You can get in there.
I must have 12 because mine go up to like here.
Okay.
Eric is touching his forehead.
Okay.
Eric is touching his forehead.
That's probably the hardest I've laughed at something Jordan said this year.
Oh, man.
No, that's good.
That's great.
Well, it's just that you didn't laugh that hard.
Oh, no, it's good.
I'm tired.
It was hard.
It was hardy trust me
we should get into the facts
cause then I also imagine
him just slapping his head
alright
it's only June Jordan
plenty of time
you make me laugh
it'll be funnier
not that you make me laugh
listen
we can stop facts Wingstop facts.
Our previous Wingstop episode was released March 2nd, 2021,
where we ate, Nick's blown away,
where we ate the Wingstop hot lemon bayou barbecue and lemon garlic wings.
It received an average score of 74.
That's high.
Very high, especially for a newer score.
Yeah.
Last year.
Isn't that crazy?
Yeah, with scoreflation, that's like...
Last year?
Two years.
Hold on.
It's 2019?
Where are we?
In two years, we'll have gone to Wingstop?
It's March 2020.
Yeah.
Still.
Guys, it's March 2020.
Hey, you,
this thing's going to blow over.
You know what I mean?
I'm going on vacation.
Yeah.
It's nine,
10,
2001.
Oh yeah.
Have you seen McMillions yet?
I'll now I will say this might be controversial.
I'm going to put this out there.
I wish nine11 never happened.
No. I apologize I don't think it's ever been that quiet for that long
We both had tears in our eyes
Just staring at each other
That's really what made it hard. I can see
you just hiding it.
It was great because it
reached a certain point where it was like, we have crossed
the threshold. Oh, I felt it.
I felt it.
We're being recorded.
It became, how long can this go?
It became like, we're gonna
get out there and then when you go through the portal, you're just floating in the space.
And you're going, oh, fuck.
When that's not edited, it's going to have so many people going, they're driving and going, what happened?
It's true.
That's awesome.
If we got you just by being quiet and you thought the episode fucked up,
tweet at us, hashtag got me.
Ooh.
Yeah.
You know what?
I stand with Eric.
Now that I've thought about it.
I stand with Eric.
I'm just going to say it.
I'm going to leave it at that.
You know what?
Thank you.
Don't try to persuade me.
Don't talk me out of it.
I don't want to hear your arguments.
I don't want to hear your debates.
This is a closed conversation. The end. That's it. I'm sorry. I hear your arguments. I don't want to hear your debates. It's a closed conversation.
The end. That's it. I'm sorry. I'm moving on.
I don't think we need a devil's advocate
for this one, guys.
But surely they'll leave a comment.
I don't care who you saw in the smoke.
Dude, I remember that.
Oh, yeah.
On to the second fact.
God.
Diamond episode.
In order to protect themselves from liability,
Wingstop has an online FAQ,
that's a page of frequently asked questions,
that states that you are not allowed to send them ideas
for flavor combinations or new food ideas.
Wingstop and Face Jam are very similar,
and we get along.
I think it's awesome
that a multinational corporation
just goes,
keep it to your fucking self.
That rule,
and you're going like,
what if you mix the Parmesan?
Shut up.
Perfect.
Yeah.
Because then they'll have to
give that guy like a million dollars.
So it's a liability thing, right?
It's sending a screenplay.
You didn't open email, did you? It's sending a screenplay. You didn't open email, did you?
It's sending a screenplay to someone and then they have
a similar idea years later. Exactly.
And you go, look, I sent you that. We run into that here.
Yep. God. It happens all
the time everywhere with creative. And so
Wingstop is saying, this happens with
chicken wings. Yeah. Wingstop
fancies themselves the
MGM. Well, I think
Wingstop sent us your movie ideas.
Rick Ross is that roaring lion, so I like it.
I think it's also, I mean, they're probably smart, too,
because it's not like Wingstop is reinventing the wheel here.
No.
They're going, hey, a new flavor came out?
Let's put it on the chicken.
Hope to God no one recommended it.
And also, just by the sheer number that they pump out,
eventually it's just going to line up.
They're going to copyright on themselves eventually.
So don't send us anything.
Do you think, do you think, where do we eat?
Do you think Wingstop?
It's because the logo is so memorable.
Oh my God.
I thought we were at a Wegmans.
No, Wegmans isn't too nice.
Stop and shop.
There you go.
It looked like a small grocery store.
Yeah.
And I went, so this is the sign?
Just very confusing.
Times New Roman 12 point font.
Yeah, just text.
No green.
And no logo.
Nope.
That was in plastered all inside the building.
Michael saw it and then went, is this their actual signage?
Or is this for the mall?
Yeah.
Wing stop.
Oh, great.
And, and, and, even though the text is like
i don't know it's the same or similar they didn't bend it no no bend uh that costs money i i mean
i will say at a sit-down restaurant like that they don't have the money i will say it was written
in all caps and green but in my head it's all lowercase and white. It was the most, like...
Wingstop.
It was like, they might as well have just said,
like, food here. Yeah!
It was one of those times, you know?
Like, in early 2000s
video game, it just says restaurant.
Right, right, right.
Yeah, I mean, basically.
Except, like, your brain,
you know, if some shit's, like, misspelled,
if you really quickly, like, fix it for you.
It's like that.
I thought it said restaurant.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Because it's like, oh, well, that's obviously just some.
You pass in a video game and you go, you can't go in that door.
Yep.
Right.
That's a background.
Yeah.
Sorry, this door isn't open.
Oh, it's two dimension.
It's flat.
That door's flat.
Yeah.
Thanks for playing Vice City.
Third fact, for every 10 wings you order,
Wingstop will throw in an extra one.
So if you ordered 10, you should receive 11.
Here we go.
20 would be 22.
30 is 33, and so on.
Now that we've posed this as a happening,
the monkey is already working on what he is calling wing singularity
or, quote,
wingularity, so he can achieve
free wing nirvana.
Little freak.
I mean, okay. Again, I'm always met
with, you typed it.
Second of all, I look up and see this guy writing
something. Let's go.
He also looked
like he was angry While he was writing it
Yeah
And I was shocked
Not angry
Determined
Yeah
Whoa
He is going to college
Man he did get
Grown up
We might have to get him
Like a little stash
Or something
Wow
Oh
A little
Yeah
Make him a proper
Yeah
Or like a face tattoo
Oh she
Early 20s guy
What if we do
What if we give him
Like a soul patch
Monkey soul patch?
Monkey soul patch.
Sounds like he doesn't like it. He's not sold on it.
Yeah.
Right, which makes me think that we should do it.
He made that same sound when we took him to get his shots.
You gotta go.
You gotta go.
It's for your own good.
He's scared of needles, you guys.
Oh my God.
Good, I don't have any. Oh, my God. Good.
I don't have any on me today.
Today.
Today.
Watch your back.
Put a needle in it.
This guy stabbed me in the back when he needled me.
In 2021, former employees in Mississippi brought a lawsuit against Wingstop,
claiming the restaurant forced them to pay for background checks,
any cash register shortages, safety training, and uniforms,
Rick Ross, owner of Wingstop,
recorded a video on his patio
saying that mistakes happen,
but he doesn't make them twice,
stating, quote,
let's be great, a toast to the hustlers.
That's us.
What?
What?
What?
The hustlers?
Did you guys hear what I read?
Is that right?
Wait, hold on. Hold on a a second i'm starting to think starting to think this rick ross is a different rick ross than i was picturing this is rick ross is he really the owner yes so i saw this earlier
and i was like oh a fact about rick ross is gonna pop up and then michael read that he was the owner
and i was like it's some other guy named Rick Ross.
It is Rick Ross.
And there is a video of him on the patio going.
Yeah.
And then he pays the fines or whatever.
And then he goes,
mistakes happen,
but I'll make them twice.
And then you go,
cool.
And then he's just on his patio and he's got like food and shit.
And you go,
Rick Ross.
Okay.
A toast to the hustlers.
What is he?
What is he referring to the
employees as hustlers?
I don't know. I don't think that's great.
Is it him? Who is the hustlers?
That's why I wrote that's us.
A toast to the hustlers. Me only.
It was end quote. That's us.
It must be us
who is the hustlers.
Us? Face jam?
Or us just not
us people eating Wingstop. This also happened in 2021 so he's probably listening to Face Jam. usless. Face jam? Yeah. Or us just not No, us face jam.
Not like us people eating Wingstop.
Well, this also happened
in 2021,
so he's probably listening
to face jam.
Mm-hmm.
Rick Ross is seeing
that Wingstop is getting
reviewed by face jam.
Dude, 74.
He must be thrilled.
Yeah.
Great score.
Yeah, but he's gotta be nervous
because
who knows?
What about today?
Yeah, ooh,
scoreflation,
secret invasion.
Think about it.
Michael's thinking about it.
Yeah.
Could be a scroll among us.
Is it,
is it Eric?
You can tell us if it is.
I'm not,
I don't know.
Oh,
he can tell us.
Yeah.
You can,
no,
you can trust us.
Is it Eric?
Michael,
you're allowed to tell us.
We,
I mean,
we might be scrolls too.
You guys are...
Hmm?
But we're not...
Maybe...
Some of us are?
We're just trying to get to the bottom of it.
Earlier this year, a former employee in California brought a lawsuit against Wingstop
claiming the restaurant forced them to pay for background checks.
Any cash register shortages...
Hey, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh. That rules
Where did I get to?
Right after uniforms
A former wingstop employee for a lawsuit against
a wingstop claiming the restaurant forced him to pay for background checks
any cash register shortages
safety training and uniforms
whoops a toast to the hustlers I guess
laughing laughing Any more information on that?
Did he make another video?
It's pretty exciting, right?
Weirdly, no. Oh.
Don't make mistakes twice.
Anyway.
Those are all the facts Oh man
That was awesome
That
I'll be honest
That was so cool
The commitment for me to continue going
Thinking
I fucked up
For a second
I thought you did too
And then Jordan went
Fuck it I'm gonna plow through
And then went
It's different
Oh it's different
But it's the same
i was like i've fucked up like this before
this is why stand-up comedians don't go up there and read jokes they haven't read before
because sometimes they're too funny oh man oh yeah i got i got the sweats just for a second
just for a second and then and then second. And then I turned off emotion.
And just barreled through.
You turned that part of your brain off.
That's a good survival technique.
If you can do that.
So those are all the facts about Wingstop.
We learned a lot about Wingstop.
I don't know anything about Marvel's Secret Invasion.
It's a show, right?
It's a Disney show?
It's like Nick Fury got his own show.
I thought he died or whatever or regular
aged this is present day so he's aging okay that's cool it's actually a big it's a big deal
because he's like you're too old now nick not not you who said that to him
did he say i'm not old i'm young he said i said not you, and he goes, I know, I'm young.
Who was telling him he was old?
Ben Mendelsohn, the guy who plays... Mendelsohn?
I don't know what his name is, but he's a Skrull.
Oh, no.
But they're friends.
They're friends.
They're friends.
It's okay.
See, okay, so you can be friends with Skrulls.
No, he was regular age in that, too.
That was only back in time. Well, also, he ages.
They get around the fact that Captain Marvel was set 30 years ago
and was filmed two years ago by saying that Skrulls age slowly.
And so in his human form, he looks the same because he's barely aged,
even though it's been 30 years since we've seen him on camera.
Okay.
So the show is showing
that you can be nice to Skrulls
and friends with them.
Yeah, but some Skrulls...
The good ones, yeah.
Yeah, some Skrulls you can't be.
Oh, okay.
How do you tell?
If they're trying to kill you, bad.
Oh, okay.
That's all I know so far.
I will say...
I've only watched the first episode.
I will say that doesn't just apply to Skrulls.
That's most things.
No, it does.
Dogs. Good dog, not killing you. Bad dog, killing you. Yeah will say that doesn't just apply to Skrulls. That's most things. Dogs. Good dog?
Not killing you. Bad dog?
Killing you. Yeah, but you don't know. Right. Skrull
style, you don't know. Well, I mean
imagine if a dog that wanted
to kill you could turn into
shapeshift into a dog that you
know doesn't want to kill you. Then all of a sudden
we've added a layer of complexity.
I hadn't considered a dog shapeshifting
into a dog that doesn't want to kill me. And the drama and the danger has been ramped up. What, do you think he'd turn into a human? You dumb I hadn't considered a dog shape-shifting into a dog that doesn't want to go out
what'd you think he'd turn into a human?
you dumb dog
he's a dog scroll
I would never be a dog scroll
he'd be a rat scroll
too obvious
it's true
you say that but Peter fucking Pettigrew
looks like a rat
turns into a rat
it was pretty one to one on that one he just got smaller fucking Pettigrew looks like a rat. It really was.
It was pretty one-to-one on that one.
Yeah.
He just got smaller.
So you,
so you have watched the first episode of the show and we'll say you can judge
the whole thing on it.
No,
I would never spit silly.
Well,
I'm kind of,
we are in the spitting silly.
I'm fucking around a little bit.
That was before the haiku.
I'm simply fucking around a little bit. Okay. He's been silly. Go ahead. I just wanted to make sure where we were in the script little bit. No, you're not. That was before the haiku. I'm simply fucking around a little bit.
Okay.
He's been silly.
Go ahead.
I just wanted to make sure where we were in the script.
Yeah.
That's not your line.
Would you recommend the show?
Yeah, I got this.
Would you recommend the show based on the first episode?
I mean, if you want to watch all the Marvel stuff, yeah.
You kind of have to.
Okay, but what if you're like a normal human person?
How much have you watched Marvel-wise?
Have you watched a lot of the Disney Plus shows?
I've watched none of the Disney Plus shows.
Okay, you don't need to watch it.
Okay.
You absolutely don't need to watch it.
That's right.
I've only watched Moon Knight.
Oh.
I've never watched Moon Knight.
Oh.
I would never watch Moon Knight.
Who the bones?
What now?
We're going to get him to...
Honestly, it could be mummies.
I can see about all the bones from the mummies.
Lots of bones out there in the sand.
Is that where the shit takes place?
Some of it.
Some of it does take place in the sand.
Okay.
I don't think I've consumed any Marvel stuff since the big movie.
This is a good question, though.
I've seen everything except She-Hulk.
Should I watch it?
Yeah, because I think this will be important to other stuff.
Should I watch She-Hulk first?
I don't know how much She-Hulk is tying into it.
I liked She-Hulk though, so I would recommend it.
Yeah.
Do you think this is how...
You thumbs up everything though.
I know, but you like everything.
Do you think this is going to tie into Fantastic Four?
They're making a Fantastic Four? It just doesn't feel like they're going to backdoor it. Like it doesn't feel like they're going to tie into Fantastic Four they're making a Fantastic Four
it just
doesn't it feel
doesn't it feel like
they're going to backdoor it
like it doesn't feel like
they're going to do that
well usually
so they made it
so that Nick Fury
is tied to Captain Marvel
so I think this will tie
into the Marvels
which is the next
Captain Marvel movie
not to be confused with
the comic book company
you can stop there
not to be confused with
it's already confusing
I don't want you
to get confused,
which is why I'm explaining it.
There's three captains.
It all started with
Stan Lee in 1936.
Start with Jack Kirby.
Three marbles.
Who's that?
Exactly.
You can't just make it up.
He's got red shoes
and a pink face.
Kirby, yeah.
Kirby's a video game character.
Dummy.
Nick is miming
being Kirby and eating.
I hope that's what he was miming.
Let's learn about this
fucking thing.
Please.
Wingstop.
Secret invasion wings.
Secretly sweet.
That's one of them.
Yep.
Mango habanero
and a tangy citrus
balanced with rich
Asian flavors.
That's all they got.
Love them.
Rich Asian flavors?
Mm-hmm.
Crazy rich Asian flavors.
Great. That's great. Is that where them. Rich Asian flavors? Mm-hmm. Crazy rich Asian flavors.
Great.
That's great.
Is that where Awkwafina blew up?
Or was she blown up before that and I was just late? She was around before that.
I mean, around.
But it was that and then the farewell.
Yeah, was that before the farewell?
I think they were like right around the same time.
Okay, I think the farewell is really what put her over the top.
Because she was just kind of a side character in... Which one's that? What's the farewell is really what put her over the top. Because she was just kind of a side character.
Which one's that?
What's the farewell?
The farewell is where she's like the granddaughter and they can't tell her grandmother that she's dying.
Yeah, the grandmother's dying and she's like,
why can't we talk about this?
And that's what the movie is.
That's different from Crazy Rich Asians.
Which is a very interesting phenomenon in Chinese culture.
But then I feel like she was in a lot of stuff right after that,
got really overexposed, and now has disappeared.
She's got what I call the Lin-Manuel Miranda effect going on,
where it's like everyone's sick of her because she's just been...
Just too much.
Overexposure.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It is what it is.
And then she had the misfortune of being in The Little Mermaid,
which also had Lin-Manuel Miranda music in it.
She was in The Little Mermaid? Yeah. Is she the little... Who is she? I don't know. She's not Little Mermaid, which also had Lin-Manuel Miranda music in it. She was in The Little Mermaid?
Yeah.
Is she the little, who is she?
I don't know.
She's not The Mermaid.
I haven't.
No, she's not The Mermaid.
I can guarantee you that.
Is she Da Crab?
Is she Da Crab?
No, not Da Crab.
Is she Da Fish?
No.
She might be Da Fish.
She has a rap number.
She's A Fish, right?
Is she like a new fish?
Oh, she's the fucking seagull.
There you go. So not a fish. Not a fish. Eats fish. E right? Is she like a new fish? Oh, she's the fucking seagull. There you go.
So not a fish. Not a fish. Eats fish.
Eats fish. Different. Hates fish.
Flying fish.
I don't know if she hates fish.
It was a seagull, right? Don't they eat fish?
I don't know if seagulls hate. Anyway.
Go ahead. Flavor invasion.
What are we talking about? The second flavor! Crazy Rich Asians is what we were talking about.
The other flavor! Boy, we went so we were talking about. The other flavor!
Boy, we went so many layers on that, didn't we?
Diamond episode.
Diamond.
Platinum.
Double.
Platinum higher.
Platinum lower.
S tier.
Double diamond.
I probably jumped a diamond too quickly.
Diamond dogs.
Oh!
From Metal Gear, not Ted Lasso.
I have a jacket that says that.
That's cool.
From Metal Gear, not Ted Lasso. I can't jacket that says that. That's cool. From Metal Gear, not Ted Lasso.
I can't wait to play Metal Gear Triangle.
Go ahead.
Flavor Invasion.
Savory garlic tossed.
Savory garlic tossed with bold Cajun seasoning and buttery Parmesan.
End.
Crazy Rich Cajuns?
Is that something?
Well, maybe on SNL. Where's the source material? It really is. You know something I well maybe on SNL
where's the source material
it really is
you know what
that is an SNL
that man
send it to them
send it to them
if they open the email
they'll have to pay you for it
we get to see them
this is good
hey Lorne
I know you're watching this
I want to be the new
SNL cast member
no
don't do that
I'm that guy
get him
don't do that
get him
you ever see that video the guy made a song about
wanting to be the new SNL cast member and
everyone on the internet went, we hope you die.
It was bad.
It was crazy.
Did he get the tape?
No, he went
off the internet.
Lorne Michaels.
I was with
I was at dinner with Paul Simon. Oh. Yes. I was with... Hey, it's me, Lorne.
I was at dinner with Paul...
I was talking to...
I was talking to Simon.
I was talking to Myers.
I just don't know if the sketch is going to be anyone's favorite.
Why now?
Everyone has a Lorne Michaels.
It's pretty good.
I think he's just An easily imitatable guy
He's just
He's just such a
Striking guy
Yes
He's just very
Not
I like when he appears
In the show
And he doesn't say anything
Yeah he's
I think that's really funny
I like it because
He's not thrilled to be there
He does not want to do this
It is a crutch
He does not find it funny
It's great
But that's what makes it funny
Exactly
Press material
I want to talk about SNL more what makes it funny. Exactly. Press material.
I want to talk about SNL more.
Maybe it comes up in the press material.
Could be. Go ahead.
Go ahead. Here we go.
Our ranch is a lifestyle. Plain
and simple. Said Wingstop's director
of culinary chef.
Oh. Director of culinary.
Chef Larry Bella. Is culinary a thing you, director of culinary. Chef Larry Bella.
Is culinary a thing you're director of?
This guy, yeah.
Okay.
Makes more sense than saying director of chefs.
I guess.
But if plain isn't your jam,
one of my favorite secret menu hacks
is to mix one of our 11 flavors with ranch
for a one-of-a-kind flavored ranch combo.
Our most loyal fans deserve to hold one of our 11 flavors with ranch for a one-of-a-kind flavored ranch combo. Our most loyal fans deserve
to hold one of our precious secrets in their hands,
especially on the holiday that crowns Ranch King.
There was no press release for Secret Invasion Wing.
What holiday is it?
Ranch King?
Is this like Midsommar?
Yeah.
Are we crowning the ranch king?
Who is the ranch king?
Time to get pasty and naked.
Yeah.
I'm wearing a ranch crown.
The little cups of ranch in my head.
Okay.
And what do you think with the second piece of fresh material?
Thanks for finding another one.
Yep.
We've got to reach a point Where we don't expect these guys
To come and save us every time something
Goes wrong Samuel L. Jackson
Told Marvel.com
This was one of those times
So it's that kind of series where we try and
Solve things without being too superhuman
But use the espionage angle
As well as we can
This isn't even about the restaurant
What the fuck
Diamond angle as well as we can. This isn't even about the restaurant. What the fuck?
Diamond.
It's real.
It's real.
Fucking Star Wars like, I got a purple light saber.
The same interview is like,
purple's pimp.
That's why it's purple.
Okay.
Thanks, Sam.
What's Nick Fury got that's purple?
I'm sure he has something.
I bet if you flip up his eye patch, it's that.
It's what?
Purple.
His eye is purple?
No, the eye patch.
Oh, like underneath?
Yeah.
I'm pretty sure the Nick Fury in the comics were purple or something.
The Nick Fury in the comics was a white guy who hung out with the Punisher.
So he liked cops?
I don't know.
I have no idea.
It doesn't make any sense.
They don't like cops, or they do, and they're friends?
I don't get it
What's purple?
The Punisher?
Is he purple?
The Punisher should be dressed in purple
What's the difference between purple and indigo?
Or is indigo blue?
Violet? Violet's purple
See that's where you're really getting me
Like fucked up because
The difference between
Violet and indigo
Could be like
Just the littlest like adjustment on the color
No no no let me simplify it for you
Roy G. Biv
You're correct but where
So now you know
Indigo violet
Next to each other
Right
If you were to show me indigo and violet And you right now you know if you were to show me
indigo and violet and you kind of like this witchdom yeah oh you did a little flip-flop
you have no idea i want to know which one's which and i don't know when that becomes purple
i'm yeah but i saw you where you're i saw you where you were how you were drawn on the van so
what does that have anything to do with it that's, that's right. If your color conversation is like,
I remember the can.
Yeah.
I remember the short can.
Get him.
Did you do the can?
I don't remember who drew that can.
I did better than him.
I forgot what I was trying to draw.
He drew the can.
Something was wrong with that.
Something was wrong.
It said it was purple
and it just kept drawing indigo.
I remember he drew the soup can.
It was a beer.
No, it was a soup can. It was a beer. No, it was a soup can.
It was a soup can.
No, that's how beer looks.
I'm just trying to remember
that was you or him.
That was him.
That's a great example
of how memories can like
get formed by somebody
just saying the same shit
over and over.
No, no, go.
Because you just kept
calling it a soup can
and in my head it was like,
yeah, Eric drew a soup can.
Right, this sucks.
And then Eric saying
it was supposed to be beer.
I was like,
it was supposed to be beer. Although he didn, yeah, it was supposed to be beer.
He didn't say supposed to. He just said it was beer.
It was not.
You drew a soup can and then you wrote
voodoo on it.
It's okay to try and fail.
I remember he made me draw a beanie
on someone for some reason.
Anyway, that van's dead now. Stop asking him.
Yeah, goodbye. Hey, let's rate
this food. what did you think
of what we were doing here
what was with the
so you also got
we got the sandwiches
can I say
yeah
there's nothing new
with the rating
and I feel like
go ahead
maybe people might think
this is normal
but I feel like
this episode for sure
the food really
took a backseat
oh big time
big time
and it doesn't
I mean it does
it happens
it does usually
but I mean this time this one it happens. It does usually,
but I mean, this time,
this one was,
it felt intentional and deserved.
Deserved is right.
I don't want to spend too much time talking about it,
but we did get,
we did get the boneless wings.
So why were they so much more
flavorful than the sandwich?
This is what I wanted to do
because last time
we just got the straight wings
and it was three different flavors.
Chicken sandwiches are a thing
they've really been pushing hard
for like the last,
I'd say a year or so.
They're like,
oh, we do chicken sandwiches,
get chicken sandwiches.
This is like our thing now.
So I wanted to get the flavor
on the chicken sandwich,
but I figured,
oh, we'll get a 10 piece wing
just in case.
They couldn't have been more different.
Yeah, it's crazy.
When you eat the sandwich,
I had the secretlyly sweet sandwich first
I didn't want to get it confused with the flavor invasion
And it just really
Didn't come through
It smelled weird I can tell you that
In a Wingstop kind of way
Like that smell to me
Is only happens at Wingstop
Kind of like how Subway has a smell
I think Wingstop also has a smell
And I don't really know how to describe it And it didn't really I didn't get only happens at Wingstop. Kind of like how Subway has a smell. I think Wingstop also has a smell.
And I don't really know how to describe it.
And it didn't really, I didn't get,
I didn't know what flavor it was.
Like, it didn't have it labeled or anything.
And I was like, is this Secret Invasion? Is this sweet?
Which one's the sweet one?
And then I had the boneless Wingbird,
and then I go, oh yeah,
this one's definitely the sweet one.
It was also pretty spicy,
which the sandwich was not.
The sandwich was not spicy at all.
The wing was very spicy.
Like, really impressed with how much heat
there was in that wing.
Yeah, to the point where Spice Shrew,
like myself,
needed to go get more water.
He's just jumping animals.
Oh, man.
I mean, it's close, right?
A shrew, what is that?
A cousin.
Smaller than a mouse cousin.
It's a mouse cousin.
But then you try the other sandwich.
Hey, Siri, what's the smallest rodent?
Mm, that's good.
The flavor invasion?
You need to stop talking because Siri is picking all of this.
Hey, Siri, do you like flavor invasion?
No, stop listening.
Don't listen to him.
It also made it sound like you were asking about the smallest animal,
and he said, mm, sounds good, like he's eaten it before, whatever it is.
But have you eaten its bones?
No, you can't look at him.
He gets rid of them.
It's still going, by the way.
It's the shame.
Shame!
I wish I could take screenshots of my watch.
Hold on, let me just take a picture of this.
Keep talking, Eric.
Okay, the boneless wing for the flavor invasion
has, like, a red dusting or something on it. It does? Yeah, which, like, this one, wing for the flavor invasion has like a red dusting or something on it.
It does?
Yeah, which like this one, like the sandwich didn't.
It was very weird.
I just don't know.
Yeah.
No, I'm just kidding.
I got it.
Yep.
I got it.
You want to take a, you want to eat it or what?
No.
Okay.
Looks like cheese.
And it's just, I don't know.
It was weird.
What was weird? Which one?
Just wings on both of them. Oh, okay.
It's cold as shit. Yeah.
You can bite it. You can go nuts.
Yeah. Are you going to video it? Yeah, absolutely.
No, go for it. Video it? Yep.
Oh, come on.
If you're listening
to this, yeah, you're going to want to watch that video. Oh, my God. If you're listening to this,
yeah, you're going to want to watch that video.
Oh, my God.
This is so much hotter.
It's insane, right?
And I roughed it all over my lips. Yeah.
Not for nothing,
I also hate the seasoning on their fries.
Holy shit. It's sweet and salty
It doesn't need to be
How you doing over there bud
Oh no poor Mikey
I liked
I liked flavor invasion a little bit better
Because I think the parmesan
Works really well on the way
The chicken was fried and stuff
So that was good
Also wing was better regardless So really well on the way that the chicken was fried and stuff. So that was good.
Also, wing was better regardless.
Yeah.
So,
go with the wings, I say.
Yeah.
But flavor-wise,
Secret Invasion is giving,
it's giving me a,
you know,
a 63.
Okay.
It could have been better.
The wing saved it.
Mm-hmm.
Definitely. If we'd never had the wings, I think we'd have, oh, the burgers were, not burgers, but the sandwiches were not good. Okay. It could have been better. The wings saved it. Definitely. If we'd never had the
wings, I think we'd have... Oh, the burgers were
not burgers, but the sandwiches were not good. No.
They were like really low. They were not great.
The buns were crazy. Listen to this.
Let's see if you can...
Ignore that. Let's see if you can hear this. This is the bun.
Oh!
This guy... I'm not eating that.
I'm obsessed with this bun.
I got the weird bun. I guess you with his bun. I got the weird bun.
I guess you did.
My bun wasn't weird, but it wasn't very flavorful.
No, it didn't taste like anything.
It didn't taste like anything.
Nick's was sweating.
It was perspiring.
It looked like it could be a nice buttery bun.
And there was just nothing.
It looks like it's going to be.
It looks good.
And it was just nothing. I think it's going to be It looks good Yeah And it
It was just nothing
I think all of our butter
Got on Nick's
Yeah I think you're right
Because this was like
Way too greasy
How's the
How's the heat over there bud
It's hot
It's all over my lips
You're sweating
Well because I rubbed it
All over my face
You can watch the video
Of that on YouTube
Don't say we don't make sacrifices
Yeah that's
Straight up was a
snack-rifice.
It wasn't great.
That was the best part.
What I just rubbed on my face.
Maybe I didn't try that wing
because I was snacking on the wings.
I was surprised the Parmesan one,
there was only one left when I went for it.
I was like, who ate all these?
There were five each.
It was Michael.
I didn't eat all of them. one left when I went for it. Yeah. I was like, who ate all these? There were five each. It was Michael. Oh.
No, I didn't eat all of them. Michael ate all of them.
No.
Anyway,
it was fine.
Not great.
Yeah.
I'm going to say
57.
He's doing the math.
Oh, okay.
He's trying to get
the wingularity.
Okay.
9-11. It shouldn't have happened. Oh, okay. He's trying to get the wingularity. 9-11.
It shouldn't have happened.
It's fine.
Huh?
What did Jordan say?
He was trying to do the math with you.
No, what was his number?
63.
Okay.
57.
Okay.
Oh, wow.
It's an average score of 60.
I think we nailed that.
Definitely get the wings.
Don't bother with the sandwich.
The sandwich is a waste.
If you get the wings,
don't rub them on your face.
Don't rub them on your face.
Or at least your lips.
Yeah, be prepared for the...
The secretly sweet
is secretly spicy.
Be prepared for that.
It's good, though.
It's like a Greenland-Icewind situation.
It's a decent kick.
They're trying to trick us.
Oh, it's a decent kick.
I would say that's the best thing here,
was this, the wing.
You know what?
I don't like spicy food,
but I agree with you,
because it was...
Not that it's a rave review,
but it was probably the best thing here.
It was the maximum of all the flavors.
At least it has flavor.
Yes.
It's flavorful.
Yeah, the
other one is more of a texture
number, which sometimes
I'm down for.
We're waiting. Eric left.
Yep.
What was that in reference to?
His favorite.
Hey, that's from Maryland.
I can already tell. Really? That is the
flag of Maryland. There's no note in this, and I don't remember who sent it.
But we're on to our snack attack.
If you're from Maryland and you sent us something with a little Maryland flag bow on it.
Maybe there's a note in it.
These are Sweet Cascades Chocolatiers.
Oh, my God.
Sweet would rule right now.
This is...
Watch out.
It might be spicy.
What the fuck?
I already ate my banana.
What the fuck is this? That's my fucking... The box is falling apart, which is... Watch out, it might be spicy. What the fuck? I already ate my banana. What the fuck is this?
That's my fucking...
The box is falling apart, which is...
It is.
I think there's a note, but these look like chocolate crabs.
Oh, fuck.
Oh.
Here you go.
Grab a...
That's what they're known for, the crab king!
Here we go.
Found it.
Oh, wow.
Found the note.
You want to grab a crab?
Dear Bugrackle Monkey Kings...
Wow, that's Monkey Kings, huh?
There's light and dark.
Thank you for putting such an entertaining podcast.
I look forward to listening to your shenanigans every fortnight.
I've enclosed some chocolates from Elliott City, Maryland
that are spiced with Old Bay seasoning.
Oh, no.
I took a bite before I heard that.
I hope that the fact that they are crab-shaped
does not set off your anti-bug security screening.
As a Marylander, I am obligated by law to inform you that crabs are in fact not bugs but are actually very tasty
and normal things zach from maryland they're bugs they're sea bugs oh man the old bay is in there
it's still better than what was burning my face it'd be better without the old bay it'd be good if it was just chocolate that is weird
it is weird it's almost kind of crackly
I like it
but then I don't
but then I do
and then I don't again
yeah I'm also
trying to figure out
it needs to be
he loves it
love it
he says he loves it I loves it It says it
I don't know where I land
On Old Bay
Seasoning
This is the best I've tasted of it
Cause I don't like it
What the fuck
I got double birded
Yeah Eric chase him out of here
Tell him get lost
Get lost!
No!
I thought you guys were, like, back on.
This is going to ruin everything.
Michael, Eric gave me crap.
Jesus Christ.
Cut it, cut it, cut it.
No, leave it in.
No, leave it in.
Yeah, that was funny.
Two to one, overruled.
I want more.
This is, I like it.
All right.
You and him fucking suck them down.
It's fine.
Uh, I don't prefer it.
It's so weird.
I can taste like the little, the little pepper.
I just want to point out.
You said we could have them.
He came back.
What do you mean?
What do you mean?
He came back.
Try the dark chocolate one.
He already had one.
And then you said you can suck them down. He went, Oh, I know. Why are you mean? What do you mean he came back? Try the dark chocolate one. He already had one. And then you said you can suck him down.
He went, oh, I know.
Why are you freak?
Why are you telling me like I don't know his behavior?
Insane.
It hurts my throat.
Oh, that's right.
Because he's your best friend.
How would I know as well as you?
Never mind.
That was foolish of me to assume.
That's right.
Eric just gave me a look going like, you know, Nick, as well as I do.
Hey, Siri, who's my best friend?
And guess what, Siri? Guess who Siri is? Nick. It's Nick as well as I do. Hey Siri, who's my best friend? And guess who Siri is?
Nick.
It's Nick going, it's me.
Well, Zach from Maryland, weird crab snack.
This is something you bring back
when you take a trip to Maryland
and you go, look at this weird food
I got when I was here.
Great snack to send to the show
because it's regional, it's weird.
He loves it. It's not bugs. He loves it. It, it's weird. Mm-hmm. He loves it.
It's not bugs.
He loves it.
It's not bugs.
It's not bugs.
He loves it, this guy.
That's why he likes it.
And maybe you come back,
maybe you come back from Maryland
with,
you do
this
and like a
season one DVD box set
of The Wire.
Oh!
You can get that,
you can get that anywhere.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, but in Maryland it's special.
It's like,
yeah. Mm-hmm. From the heart, you in Maryland it's special. It's like, yeah.
From the heart, you know.
Or do you do like a homicide life on the streets?
Oh, that could be.
That's like, oh.
What about, have you guys watched We Run This City?
No.
It's like a spiritual successor to The Wire.
It's fucked up.
Oh.
Jon Bernthal, not the punisher this time. Nope.
He's one of the cons.
What?
Yeah.
Punishing?
Honestly, yeah, he should be punished.
Bad punishing.
Oh, no.
So what do you give this snack?
Oh, right.
70.
Wow, that's higher than I would have expected.
Yeah, I came back around on it.
Okay.
It's hard to say.
My mouth's all burnt up.
It's burnt up, and now it's cut up from the Old Bay.
Like, it gets in there.
It kind of stabs you.
65.
I'm good.
67.5.
I mean, obviously, I like it.
It's fine.
I would rather not have it.
Zach, interesting snack.
That was good.
Yeah, I give it bonus points for the novelty.
You know what would be fucking great right now?
If you busted out a bag of whatever those knockoff raisinets were.
Oh, I would be eating them.
The gummy worms.
The ones from nuts.com?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Where the fuck are more nuts?
From nuts.com?
Yeah, I want some.
We should get some more nuts.
That's why I said it to you.
Yeah.
Make it happen.
That's right.
We should all do that.
All right, let's end the show. Oh, that's right. We should all do that. Alright, let's end
the show. Oh, that's right. Hey, if you want to send us
snacks, you can. You can send them
to Face Jam, care of Eric Bedour, 1901
East 51st Street, Austin, Texas
78723. Hey, the Face Jam
Mafia tracksuits are out. You can wear those when you go pick up
fast food. Hey, how did RTX go?
Oh, is it over? By the
time this comes out. It comes out next Tuesday.
This is the episode before. Hey guys, RTX is this weekend, July 7th through 9th. Come and check it out. Wear the time this comes out. It comes out next Tuesday. This is the episode before. Hey, guys.
RTX is this weekend, July 7th through 9th.
Come and check it out.
Wear your FaceTime tracksuit.
You can check out our live show on Saturday.
What day should everyone wear their tracksuits?
Every day.
Yeah, all day.
Every day, probably.
But if you're going to pick one day, maybe.
If I'm going to pick one, I'm going to say Saturday afternoon.
Okay.
Because I think our live show is at like 6.
That's a good idea.
Yeah.
Okay.
Wear it to the live show, and we'll take a big old picture.
Yep.
Of you, not of us.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We'll just take a picture at you, and then not send it to you.
It'll be a picture of you standing and clapping.
Yeah.
For us.
And we'll take all four of our own edification.
I'll take a picture of you while I'm bowing.
Yep.
So come on through.
Come to RTX, and you can follow-
Hurry the fuck up.
At FaceJamPod at RoosterTeeth.com.
Back now.
Or else.
Don't forget we're eating stubs for RTX.
So if you're in town.
That's right.
Stubs.
We are eating stubs.
It is a local favorite.
Very excited to see what that's all about.
Also go to Diner Bar.
Don't worry about that right now.
At FaceJamPod on Instagram and on Twitter.
You can email your food conundrums.
FaceJamPod at Roosterteeth.com.
Food court coming soon.
And I guess we can announce it now.
We're announcing something.
After our second successful episode
of Spit and Silly,
the Cat Trilogy will wrap up
with one more Spit and Silly episode featuring Cat.
Right.
That's how a trilogy works. Right. It's not really
an announcement at all. And that is what we're announcing
right here. That was... We kind of announced
that at the end of the last episode.
I mean, it was groundbreaking.
Yeah, and that's what... I want people
to know the magnitude. A three episode
Kat arc? If you want... Intern
Kat, no longer an intern, hired, but not here?
Wow. Correct. All right.
Was that
all of that is right
or all right, I'll kill you?
All right. Okay.
I'll believe the magnitude
of this when we put out a press release
or something. Yeah, or we do a
we commemorate it somehow.
Okay. We do a commemoration.
A statue? Something.
You do a trilogy and then it's like how do people celebrate this? You know what I mean? Maybe a commemoration. Because that's... A statue? Something. You do a trilogy, and then it's like, how do people celebrate this?
You know what I mean?
Maybe a trilogy DVD box set.
I got that Pepsi from The Phantom Menace.
Oh, that's right.
I still got that.
Should we make Pepsi?
No, I don't think so.
Could we invent Pepsi again?
Do you think they would mind?
Do you think Pepsi would be interested with a brand collaboration deal?
With Cat?
With the Cat trilogy.
Okay.
Well, let's think on it, and I bet we can come up with something.
All right.
But that'll do it as far as business goes.
That's not it on business.
What else do we have on business?
We got...
Something may have squeaked out you may not have noticed.
Uh-huh.
To the jammers out there.
Uh-huh.
I don't know if we mentioned it.
You're certainly not mentioning it now.
No.
This guy.
This little freak, as you like to call him over there. Uh-huh. I don't know if we mentioned it. He's certainly not mentioning it now. No. This guy, this little freak, as you like to call him over here.
Yeah, uh-huh.
He has a new little outfit in the store.
He does.
It's true.
Oh, yeah.
That did kind of like fly under the radar.
Yeah.
Is it loungewear?
It is loungewear.
Deuce?
Yep.
People just found out. They just found out about the loungewear. It's? Yep. People just found out.
They just found out about the loungewear.
It's ringing off the hook.
Do you know what that means?
Ringing off the hook?
Do you understand what that means, jammers?
Do you know what it means if something's ringing off the hook?
They used to be on hooks.
They used to be on hooks.
Phones aren't on hooks anymore.
Not anymore.
How does a cell phone ring off the hook?
So let me say this.
So there's Face Jam loungewear.
They're monkey shorts.
They're like loungewear shorts.
They're very comfy.
They're awesome.
And it's just got the monkey right over the crotch, right?
I call them my monkey crotch camo.
Yeah.
Cause it's like ketchup camo motif, believe it or not.
At first glance, it kind of looks like tactical gear.
It's great.
But front not.
Right.
Fast food.
Yeah.
And then there's a, there's a top that goes with it. I thought maybe we could, like, help spread the word on these.
You know, get it out.
Get your little freak monkeys out there.
Yeah.
Get the shorts.
And so, in addition to Nick modeling, because I thought it was kind of crazy.
Again, that flew into the rear.
No one asked me to model for it.
No one asked us to, like, put a shirt on.
Well, you're not the monkey.
Well, it's going to his head.
That's what I was saying earlier, right right to try and pull him back a little bit
bring him back down to reality
I gave
I submitted a picture to Eric if he wanted to add it
to the store yeah to maybe like hype
people up more about like the shorts
is it about how like good you can look in the shorts
I mean you can take whatever you see
as you know your own interpretation
but you know you could be like wow
well I look like that when I wear the shorts?
Maybe. That's up to you.
There's really only one way to find out.
What I can say is it proves
that you can't not look like
that and wear the shorts, right? If someone
said you can't look like that if you wear the shorts, you'd say
impossible. I've already seen it.
I'm looking at a picture. Yeah. Yep.
So you can...
Go ahead. So you go ahead and have a look at the picture that. So you can go ahead.
So you go ahead
and have a look
at the picture
that we're using
to promote this.
It's good.
It's pretty good.
Nick,
how do you like
your shorts?
I'm uncomfortable.
Well,
I didn't tell him
to put the monkey there.
That's just weird.
Yeah,
that's really
what's like bothering me.
Right.
So if you wear the shorts, you might look like that.
Maybe.
I'm just saying.
You could.
It's a possibility that you could.
You could buy the loungewear shorts and maybe also, with inflation, be bigger than 2000 X-Men Wolverine.
Wow.
Maybe.
While wearing the shorts.
We don't know.
Yep.
So if you want to see that picture, you got to go to store.roosterteeth.com.
And then if you go there and look at it, you got to buy them.
It's legally binding.
It's kind of like a one-way door. You walk in
and go to leave the store and it says,
I don't even think you gotta check them with that.
They're just gonna look at it and be like, I gotta
look like that. I will say that I sent
the picture to all of us. Jordan saw
it and just sort of
put his phone away, turned off his
watch, sat there quietly,
and then just kind of thought,
yeah, he's gonna to buy those shorts.
That's what he thought. I will say
I couldn't stop looking at the shorts.
They're eye catchers.
There you have it.
Go check it out. Definitely draws the eye.
Please rate
and subscribe. We tell you guys
this every week, but it really does help us out.
Ring the bell.
All that good stuff. Tells us that we're
better. Yeah.
It doesn't matter who, just better.
Better than we used to be. It's like a strength score.
Oh. We need that.
Guys, we're gonna, okay. Alright.
No more fucking around, Jamers. We're gonna need to set some PRs
here. Okay. Get off
your ass. Alright.
And get in these shorts. I don't care if you worked out yesterday.
You can do a recovery day.
Okay?
It's called active recovery.
Now go look at these shorts
and click a thumbs up or something.
And we'll come back tomorrow.
You do a full workout.
You put them in your cart
and you buy them.
Tell a friend about the show
where we eat food
and rate the food.
But if your friend says,
I don't really care about fast food,
tell them like,
that's not really fast food.
That's just sort of like the thin premise
for them to get together once every two weeks,
honestly.
So anyway,
squirrels. No!