A Geek History of Time - Episode 273 - Belgian Nuclear Sensibilities, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Smurf the Bomb Part I

Episode Date: July 19, 2024

Item one, hit the grocery store. Item two, laundry. Item three, over through capitalism. You know, for somebody who taught Latin, your inability to pronounce French like hurts. Damn. Look at you getting to the end of my stuff. Motherfucker. But seriously, I do think that this bucolic, luxurious live your weird fucking dreams kind of life is something worth noting. Because of course he had. I got into an argument essentially with

with some folks as to whether or not punching Nazis is something you should do. And they're like, no, then you're just as bad as the Nazis. I was like, the Nazis committed genocide. I'm talking about breaking noses. Drink scotch and eat strychnine. All right. You can't leave that lying there. Luxury poultry. Yes. Yes.

Fancy chickens. Yes. Fancy chicken. Pet pet fancy chickens. Pet fancy chickens. Pet Fancy Chickens? Pet Fancy Chickens. This is a Geek History of Time. Where we connect in order to the real world. My name is Ed Blaylock. I'm a world history and English teacher here in Northern California. And I recently found out actually at the beginning of this week that if all goes according to my principal's plan, next year, I will only be saying half of that job description

Because right now plans are in place for a bunch of juggling I won't go into But it would it would free up History classes which would allow me to go into teaching history full-time Rather than having to be the the bastard half-child of two departments at once. When my history department chair kind of took me aside and mentioned that to me, he ended telling me that with looking me in the eye all faux concern and going, would you be okay with that? And like, I couldn't even play along it was like yeah, yeah, I

Please oh my god So yeah, that's that's been that's that's been the positive news Certainly in my in my professional life in the last week. How about you? Well, I'm Damian Harmony I am a US history teacher up here in Northern, California at the high school level and Let's see today my daughter decided to make macaroni and cheese the the recipe she got from What's it called the the second D&D cookbook?

It's like flavors of the multiverse or some such thing and it's actually called Tender stumble noodles, which okay. What a great name for food. I do like that. I do like that That's that's evocative. Definitely right stumble noodles. So anyway that that makes me stumble out of my diet, right? IO That makes me stumble out of my diet. Right. I oh. No, but it was really delicious. That's kind of all the news that's fit to print as far as that goes. It was very yummy. And my son is going to be making some sort of Wakandan sweet potato dessert tomorrow. So okay.

Okay. Yeah. Nice. All right. Very cool. So, let's see. Tonight, well, I have a question for you. What do you know about nuclear annihilation?

I mean, as much as any 80s kid and maybe a little bit more. Okay. You know, you and I- What song comes to mind? What theme song comes to mind when you think nuclear annihilation this this will tell us? This this is gonna be better than Myers-Briggs and anything by a turf that we could ever have come up with This is better than the what is the orientation of the chicken strapped to your head question? Yeah What theme song comes to mind? For nuclear annihilation for new well alright, you know as soon as you started answering the question

Uh-huh the phrase started going through my head. It's the final countdown And I mean, I don't know maybe I don't know if that's that's just you know, my inner drama queen But that's that's what what through my head, okay? So What what what does that say about my personality? well, it says that you are are deeply tied to the The melodrama of it. I would say it says that you very much center yourself in your own nuclear annihilation

Perspective you are a PC in your yes Yeah, okay mine Tell me what this says about me when I think nuclear annihilation. I think la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la Seem entirely on brand doesn't it it's it's it's it's a hundred and ten percent you yes. Yes it also It also makes it clear to me what what books and other media you've had your nose planted in for the last couple weeks For sure 24 pages worth tonight's episode Many to follow will be called the Smurfs more reactions to nuclear annihilation and Reaganistic

tomfoolery Okay so Okay, wait is it because they live in mushrooms is that is that like evocative of no no No, no it gets worse. All right. So in 1928, Pierre Culliford was born to a British dad and a Belgian mom in the Cherbeek district in Brussels. Cherbeek is or Char-beek? I'd have to see it spelled and even then I would only be giving an approximate guess Cherby sounds good is a city in the center of Belgium, and it's nicknamed the city of donkeys

Boy that's that's a bum rap man. I I think it's pretty no you know okay like I don't know I get it like most people disdain the donkey, but I I don't know being Okay, don't like it horseshoes around for me. No pun intended actually But it horseshoes around for me like oh wow they got a real shit name. That's pretty cool though for a shit name That's pretty cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I see what you mean crosses the line twice Yeah, but the date so the date that it was given the name, I was not able to track down, but it has had that nickname because the denizens of Cherubique have for a long time brought in loads of sour cherries using donkeys. Oh, okay. Now, sour cherries.

Yeah, right. Sour cherries, as you likely know, is a prime ingredient in Greek lambic, which you're now gonna spend a few minutes telling me about, I'm sure. Well, I mean, yeah. It's in my notes. Give space for Ed. Yeah, leave space, yeah.

Lambic is a wonderful, you always find it in the beer aisle, and it essentially, it is essentially kind of a form of beer that involves, I would almost call it more like a mead. But anyway, it's fruit of some kind. One of the most common varieties is Creek, but it's also commonly you can find apple and raspberry and peach. And it is fermented notably with wild yeast, with whatever strain of yeast is like extant in the environment in which it's made. So different lambics from different places can have somewhat different characters based on whatever the yeast is that's

local to where they're made. And Creek Lambic in particular was one of the first European beers that a 20 something me tried that that kind of helped me broaden my own my own palette in terms of beer so it holds a very dear place in my heart and it's awesome because it's it's something you can drink kind of as a dessert beverage Mm-hmm without it being too like treacly sweet. It's it's Yeah, I could I could web's wreck Rapsodic for a while, but that's very cool. Okay. That's that's neat to know Yeah, well being in the center of Belgium and proximal to Brussels this means that the city of donkeys has seen some shit Brussels this means that the city of donkeys has seen some shit. People marching through through Belgium will often march through this very area and

so from about the 1570s through the 1700s they saw opposing armies coming through and fucked them up in the name of their side and or Reformation. At one point the town was actually made its own independent municipality which was no longer tied to Brussels and then once Belgium had their own revolution for independence from French and British and Dutch control

they found stability and success being the quiet churchy gentry friendly place that they had become. By the 20th century there was a growing middle class and the district of Cherbeek continued to see a more than proportional amount of cosmopolitanism. Lots of different folks adding their own particular cultural flair to the area's character and everyone largely cohabitating peacefully in a pursuit of those things. Well that's nice. It is and it's not that Belgium and its entire country didn't have a fuckton of blood on its hands either by this point. I'm looking at you, Belgian Congo. But in the actual country of Belgium, there was a large amount of acceptance and tolerance of immigrants and expats of multiple distinct faiths. Okay, so it's almost as though they like exported all of their racism To the French. Yeah. Well, no, not to the French to to the Belgian Congo like oh, yeah. Okay

All right, they were just like it's it's that weird like the racist assholes. Yeah Yeah, but they were also they were also able to have the peace of mind that they had in the tolerance They had kind of based on the economy built off of that kind of horrible shit. So yeah. Yeah, again. Yeah, they But during World War one 35 people were executed in Cherbeek amongst them Edith Cavill Okay, now this was because the Germans occupied Belgium during the war and Cherubique is the site of Tier national TIR Which is a national shooting range. Oh Okay. Yeah, which of course makes it perfect for firing squads Yeah, it would yeah now after World War one the aforementioned prosperity had been deeply shaken as one would expect of course

Given the famines and other effects of war So Edith Cavill is I believe a Recall correctly a British nurse who was executed by the Germans. Mm-hmm. Yeah Now back to Culliford though. He grew up. He was born in 28 He grew up in an interwar Belgium in a modest family reading Hergé which is a comic Hergé is this um a lot of comics had a lot of comic creators had a nom de plume

This is the nom de plume of George Remy You mean Hergé? Probably. Okay. Yeah. Okay, got it. Yeah, I probably do. It's a British name.

It's not a British name. It's a French sounding name. So. Even more than that, it's a Francophone Belgian name. Right, right. Which is like Even even another another another measure Moved from your Latin at understanding of pronunciation. Yeah, I'm like there's a barones what yeah, um Ambiorcs and

Your point yeah So do you recognize name her J or George Remy? I do and I'm trying to remember which beloved comic series want to say 1010. Yes Of course I pronounced it Tintin but okay. Yeah, well Internationally around the world there are lots of people 1010 All right again because it's it's French and right Seations are weird and it's very possible that somebody said that to me and I picked it up and they were wrong Could be could be because they were playing the odds if you were playing at home right now with the home game of a geek

History of time the odds are it's Damien getting it wrong. Mm-hmm So unfortunately color Ford's father died when he was seven. So that's 1935. You can imagine having your father, your British father die in Belgium in 1935. There's some shit going to happen in the next little bit of your life. So life for his family was incredibly difficult. And then World War II broke out. Right he was, no he would have been. He would have been 12.

11. 11 or 12. Yeah. 12 when they plowed through I think. Yeah. It was early 40. Yeah. So yeah because it was September of 39 they hit Poland and then yeah turn around.

Kind of did a reverse Schlieffen plan. Now that I think about it. Yeah. Molify, molify the East and then run west. So yeah. But fast. So yeah, World War Two breaks out.

Belgium is again in the path of the German juggernaut, and it was once again occupied. This would also mean that Culliford grew up as a teenager in a country made poor by war and by loss and then occupied by another destructive war. Things were so tough and occupied Belgium for his family that he actually had to drop out of school at 15 and begin working to help support his family.

Culliford became a projectionist. However, he'd learned enough about art that when the war ended, he joined... Oh, fuck. The CBA, which is the Compagnie Belgique d'Actualités. Compagnie, or compagnie. Belge. Bel...

B-E-L-G-I... No, just B-E-L-G I know just be LG so Belgian. Yeah, Belgium. Okay, okay actualities Yes, the actuality. No, actually. Yeah, you're close. Yeah. Yeah. Did you take French when you were in school? No, you just um, but I spent a lot of but, but I was a medievalist in college and French is inescapable. Yeah, okay. So here at the CBA, Pierre Colaford, he, how did I, it tripped up on me, he showed enough promise that he touched up other people's art with with gouache Yeah, yeah, and he learned on the job. Okay, I don't know the CBA folded in 1946

Okay, now the war is over Everywhere in Europe is in shambles and in famine. Yeah, okay, it's it's Definitely dire straits. It is a bad lot of people yeah, and remember He was born at a time that everybody was starving He just can't he he yeah, you know his his generation really got got shafted Yeah, it's historic like that one guy who survived the Titanic and then was on the Lusitania Yeah, and also survived well, okay, so by the way that guy yeah, I would if I was that guy I would go swimming every day in the ocean

I'd be like you can't kill me you know I am immune to your power right yeah Yeah, every plan I would have is and then we escaped by walking in the ocean like Clearly I'm immune I am undrownable right Every plan I would have is and then we escaped by walking in the ocean like Clearly I'm immune. I am undrownable right so I Would try to fuck Molly Brown. I just you know well. Yeah, yeah, I mean I would do that anyway Come on. So the CBA folded in 1946 and a lot of this was due actually to the fact that animation studios in America started growing and

getting more popular. So then Colie Ford enrolled in the Brussels Academy of Fine Arts, the BAFA, but he only stayed three months and I think what we what we can note from this is that all great men don't stay in art school. Right. Right. Right. That's 110 percent. Yes. Yes.

So but terrible things. But great. Yeah. I I told that joke at a Comedy club and somebody come up later and they're like dude you walk three art students I'm kidding But anyway, he only stayed three months again your point yeah He only strayed three months because he needed to make money to eat

Yeah, he only strayed three months because he needed to make money to eat So but he made money by being an artist so from 1946 to 1951 Culliford worked as a full-time artist for different advertising firms Which Think about the fact if you have advertising firms that means you have products you're advertising which means you've got capital which means where are you getting this money and what's the answer the answer is the Marshall Plan right Belgium was one of the earliest adopters of Marshall Plan money and in fact the Soviets had hoped that Belgium would turn communist and that's one of the

reasons that America went hard in the paint giving Belgium a fuck ton of money. Just just stuck a massive o gauge needle in their economy. Yeah, $777 million in 1946. I don't even want to know how big that number is. I'm actually gonna hit pause right now so I can find out cuz I do put that in there Alright so figured it out 777 million dollars back then would total out to 100 let's see adding three zeros to this 13 billion Let's see. Adding three zeros to this. Thirteen billion three hundred and thirty four million

one hundred seventy three thousand. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So 13 billion dollars. So in other words less money than Elon Musk lost last year.

Destroy Twitter. Yeah. So but but that's that's a hard Less money than Elon Musk lost last year destroyed Twitter Yeah, so but but that's that's a harsh indictment actually of what we're doing with billionaires now So yes, it really it really is. Yes, but Yeah, that's And in thinking about what that amount of money meant within the economic scale of 1946. Yeah, because we were just going raw dollars to raw dollars if you look at what it actually would buy, the purchasing power of that. It's amazing.

So that much money from the Marshall Plan was keeping capitalism alive and well there and actually it seems to have had a genuinely restorative and positive impact on Belgium. In fact, due to Belgium's reliance on an endorsement of American capital efforts, Belgium is like one of the only Western Bloc countries that didn't experience a housing shortage or a food shortage at that time. No shit, really? Yeah. It was a peaceful and it was like this peaceful clearing in a blighted land. a post-apocalyptic wasteland of famine and and poverty yes, oh my god, we're all trying to claw our way out of literal rubble mm-hmm All those things I want you to remember all those things please For while cully ford continued his advertisement work

He also started writing comics in his spare time and he wrote several characters with fantastical backgrounds And he really kind of liked that kind of genre. But the one that started catching on was about a brave and noble medieval knight who traveled and fought for just causes named Johann. Okay. From about 1947 forward this was his most successful work and he adopted the Nom de Plume of Pio Okay, okay in his third series his third. Johan series Pio now aided by his wife Nina nine

Probably more like Nina Nina. Okay. Yeah, she was the colorist Okay, he had Johan sent out on an adventure to capture a strange creature named a Perluit. Perlui? Mm-hmm. Whom we may recognize as Pee-Wit. Okay. So in the story, Pee-Wit is considered some sort of a monster trickster thief stealing food and playing tricks on people in the area and after a bit of searching Johan finds him and discovers that Pee-wit, Pee-re-loo-it, is not a monster at all. He's instead a wild dwarf who has no magical wild dwarf powers.

Okay And the only reason Pee-wit hasn't been caught is because he escapes on his trusted steed a black goat named B-set or Bike-it. Okay. B-I-C-E-T. They become friends, Pee-wit and Johan, and Pee-wit becomes the official court jester of the realm with really annoying and awful music, but he remains a loyal companion to Johan and the court is relieved of his services regularly. So because Pee-wit is so popular, the comic got renamed Johan and Pee-Wit.

They remained fairly popular and in October of 1958, Johan and Pee-Wit embarked on another adventure in the Flute with Six Holes. Johan and Pee-Wit run into these little blue gnomes with white trousers and phrygian caps all of which was a suggestion by Nina since green would blend in with the forested areas of Johan's world who are all and all of them are three apples high and 100 years old. Okay. Now green would blend in too much. Red was too fierce of a color for a nation that was only 13 years previously occupied by the Nazis. Okay. However, Le Grand Stroumph was the only one who had a red outfit and a white beard,

so there was one. Le Grand Stroumph. The rest were hairless, and their names were Les Stroumphs, which was an inside joke between Pé and andre franquin the man Whom he'd replaced at CBA he and franquin were at dinner and from Queen Franklin Franken Frank Wong Frank Wong Jesus fucking Christ Ron Swan. I mean yeah QUIN. Yeah All right Q. All right. Yeah, Frank. Well French They were at dinner in a restaurant And payo asked for the salt, but he couldn't come up with the French word for salt which is sell Yeah

Instead he blurted out Possez moi les stromp Stromp which was a totally made-up word Okay, so Stump. Stump, which was a totally made up word. Okay. So the speech center of his brain just sound like sconcing a muffin. Do you? Yeah. Little bit. Yeah. But only, only a sconce is an actual word. An actual word. Yeah. Yeah. You know, but yeah, I'm reaching for anything. Yeah. I don't even know. Yeah. Hand me the skull, you know, but yeah I'm reaching for anything. Yeah, I don't even know. Yeah Hand me the skull, you know

Yeah So the whole night for dinner they teased his momentary lapse and they replaced all sorts of nouns and verbs with Shroom The Dutch word for Smurf came from this Okay, so all of this is to say that tonight's episode is about the history of the Smurfs. As a Belgian reaction to the specter of nuclear annihilation and then as an American reflex to

Reaganism again. Okay. Alright. Alright. So. Nice setting of the stage there. Thank you. In 1959 Peo was convinced to write a spinoff about these Smurfs by Yvonne del Porte This is the guy who who convinced him he's the editor of Spearoo the friendly rival to the Tintin magazine Okay, they were so friendly that 1965 for the April Fool's Day edition each printed their magazine with the cover of the other

Oh, that's cool. I like that. Yeah. Del Porte had convinced Pio to do so in an effort to make Spirou a publication that featured fun and zany, silly and above all joyful content. OK. With Andre Franklin, Franquin Franquan, writing Gaston Le Goff and Pio writing Smurfs. So this is going to be something that people regularly read to enjoy. It just that's what we want. We want to publish Joy.

OK, which I just I. Yeah, I love that. Me too. That's wonderfully wholesome. It really is. I mean, you can only do that because you're not starving to death or having to rebuild everything because America is absolutely just infusing. Which again goes back to the fire hose up your ass, right? You know, but it does go back to an observation that my daughter made when I said it's,

it's easy to live your ethics when your food is, when your belly is full. And she said, that's an argument for feeding people. I was like, yeah, it genuinely is like, she also added that's an argument for a universal basic income. Yeah. Yeah. As, as the, you know, token, a Catholic in the room, I'm gonna say that's that's yes. Yeah In me can we maybe please try we've tried it the other way for a while I Just want to get some data Let's do a generation. Just just yeah, can we just do 20 years? Yeah

20 can tell you what we'll cut it 15. Yeah 15. Can we like anything? Yeah? Yeah Good faith yeah, that's it and I Kind of feel like the conservative or what passes for conservative answer here in the United States would be well You know we've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas Thank you. I guess we're gonna try nothing again. Yeah, we're gonna keep trying that but I haven't given nothing enough time right I think so have we tried punishing them for being poor we have Actually, let's do that more. Let's just clearly it didn't take enough Yeah, clearly we didn't try hard enough right clearly yeah

So del porte was prone to silly gags all around the offices in Spirou in like the publication offices of Spirou Once an artist needed a picture of a lion to document himself for his comic for his comic series Mikhail And so del porte hired an actual lion cub and let it play around the office for a few weeks. Because you could back then. Because, yeah, I was like, is it no wildlife regulations? No. At all.

Probably that might have been part of what led to wildlife regulations. Could be. Could be. Um, he also had horses and chimpanzees brought to the office to pop other artists. So with Del Porte writing scripts for the Smurfs, and the Smurf spin-off mini books happening pretty soon, Pao's most successful and popular work was these three apple tall Smurfs. And within two years in 1961,

they were animated for the first time and marketed in all sorts of other ways But I'm gonna get back to that later. Yeah in July of 1959 the black Smurfs came into being One of them yeah Belgium remember right yeah so one of them one of the Smurfs gets bit by a black fly and Reduces his language to a single utterance Gnap Gnap Okay, he then bites other Smurfs on their tails spreading the disease

Okay, so yes, this is This is a proto-zombie reference. They are zombies. Yes it is. In 1959. Okay. Right. Interesting. Papa Smurf finds the fix in Magnolia pollen and he gets the remaining Smurfs to gather a ton of it and make an aerosol bomb launched at the black smurfs. Okay. They have a single violent sneeze if they breathe in and then they are cured. However, the black smurfs aren't dumber. They're just reduced in vocabulary. And as such, one of them paints themselves blue to seem like they're not infected This to me this this has some like anti-vax vibes That's my present ism looking back at well, yeah, yeah, but yeah, that's that's a lens Yeah, we would be applying on that but so a battle a battle takes place between the black and blue Smurfs outside of the village, very similar to Alicia. And this subterfuge allows the black Smurfs to then turn the tide in their direction.

And pretty soon it's just pop a Smurf left. And as he runs back to his lab to load up more pollen. He drops the jar into the fire, which explodes the entire lab and causes the pollen to rain down on all the Smurfs, curing them all. Okay. Now, in America, they weren't black, they were purple. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but in Belgium, they black. Okay, not purple now They have since retconned it in in subsequent publications and for good reasons giving our and Europe's history with blackface

That said it cannot be dismissed that there's a tremendous anti-black bias in this comic especially in 1959 Okay, so wait, hold on hold on. Okay, so wait hold on hold on okay, so 59 mm-hmm Mmm. I'm trying to remember the timeline of the dissolution of Belgium's holdings in the in the Congo you want me to do it for you Yeah Where we're going in yeah, yeah King Bedouin of Belgium was overseeing the shift in the Belgian Congo from colony to its own free country run by its own people

Yeah, but it had been under some of the most exploitative and crimes against humanity laden boots from 1881 forward Belgians murdered literally tens 10 million people in order to extract extract rubber and other resources from Congo. And by the time of this comic, there was an apartheid system in place that had been going really strong for multiple generations now. Even the names of the cities were reminders of just how awful the Belgians had been to the Congolese. And in 1959, King Bedouin and Belgium were preparing to leave Congo. And while this comic predates what happened from 60 to 61, I would be remiss not to mention

the awfulness of the Belgians in those years. Because that comes from somewhere. That comes from the same culture that would enjoy this comic. It's the same culture that saw Congolese as less than human that Absolutely would influence the choice to make bad Smurfs black So in 1958 Patrice Lumumba after serving a year in prison on trumped-up charges of embezzlement Helped to found the MNC the mouvement national Congolais He quickly became its leader and almost as quickly was imprisoned by the Belgians

Threatened by the fact that a group of black Congolese were trying to establish themselves as rightful equals in their own lands The MNC itself was a threat to Belgian authorities because it did not draw on ethnic distinctions as others had See if you draw an ethnic distinctions you can pit them against each other. Right, right. This was a unified Congolese. Right, a pan-Congolese movement. I don't care what tribe you're from. Mm-hmm. It was much more... More Congolese and we all have more in common with each other than we do with those assholes. Right. Our blackness has been so denigrated by those assholes that all of us who are black can rise up together and fight for our own system.

Identified largely because of the apartheid white run system, this becomes the unifying leader for them. The unifying identifier for them is their blackness. So that's harder for the Belgians to take advantage of, which by the way, the Belgians did a really good job of taking advantage of that in Eastern Congo in a little place called Rwanda.

So, the MNC advocated for a gradual shift from Belgian to African rule too, a thing so reasonable that it scared the shit out of the Belgians because it's possibly effective And this might actually work. We can't let it happen right and it's hard to villainize right look at those guys with their slowly Training people up Yeah, you know kind of yeah now slowly training people up. D'uh! You know? Kind of a, yeah. Now, this is largely owing to the fact that Patrice Lumumba was so popular in his appeal to all the Congolese, not simply one group or another, with kin loyalties.

Now, in December of 1958, Patrice Lumumba goes to Accra for the Pan-African Conference, the AAPC, the All African People's Conference, which was hosted by kwami nekrumah You you can imagine how antsy this is gonna make the belgian authorities in Congo when he comes back oh Yeah, so so he's the leader of a pan Congolese movement and he's meeting with Pan-african types mm African types who are who are all advocating for yeah all of these imperial powers we all got to figure out how we can work together right to to kick them the hell out and take care of

our own selves right by notice this is my god yeah this is December of 58. This is in Ghana. Right? Under Kwame Nkrumah. The country that was one of the first to kick the British out. So you're seeing success. Remember one of my favorite statistics prior to 1945 No colonized power rose up against its colonizer and won after 1945 Is the best part no colonized power rose up against its colonizer and lost lost. Yeah, right Yeah, well I mean, you know you look at you look at what the What the background was mm-hmm prior to 45 and then post 45 It's like all that starving. I was talking about yeah, remember. Oh, yeah, you know prior prior to World War two

It was the Europeans who had all the resources all the guns all the money Even though they were bled pretty hard by World War one and the subsequent Famines and shit. They were still able to hold on. In fact, what kept them from leading out was their hold and ability to squeeze on the the various colonies colonial. Yeah on their colonial holdings Whereas, you know in in in world war two the i don't the the scale and swath of destruction that was involved to the homeland of the british and the french French and the Germans like World War one damaged a shit ton of the French countryside.

Right. And left, you know, the Germans in a in an untenable position economic, you know, they suffered economic complete economic collapse. And it hurt the hell out of the Russians but the UK like their infrastructure was was basically untouched true they were the US of Of World War one. Yeah, and and even even France You know if you got more than

Ten miles away From from you know the line. Yeah You know the damage to their industrial infrastructure was Not it was a lot less Whereas in World War two it was Total warfare being carried out a generation later Yeah with with you know much more advanced like between the two wars

The advancement of bomber technology. Oh, yeah, just by itself the Aviation yeah, you know was significant enough that you know, we've talked about it before Britain was Devastated yes, you know London and and areas around the industrialized parts of England were were smashed pieces Germany was rubbled. Oh, yeah, there were towns. There were towns in Poland that were 95% rubble Yeah, right. And and yeah and and France was Shattered by the fighting and and the Germans had been doing everything in their power to loot it comprehensively while they were

While they were occupying it and so, you know at the end of all of that, the major imperial powers have beaten themselves bloody. And now they don't have anything to fall back on. They don't have the manpower, they don't have the money, they don't have the advantage anymore. And, you know, also, it doesn't it's it's not for nothing that an awful lot of colonial troops were pulled into Helping their colonial masters both World War one and World War two. It's like hey, you know what you've you've trained us to kill Europeans Now we know they bleed now. I mean, like that becomes a thing. Yeah, no, you're absolutely right. So when he shows back up in the Congo, right, which is still the Belgian Congo, but it's, you know,

as soon as he gets more and more Pan-African in his approach to Congolese independence, the more the Belgians get really, really weird about it. The MNC ends up splitting in 1959 between his group, MNCL for Lumumba and the MNCK for Albert Kalonji. Kalonji was a Luba chief who preferred a more of a federated approach and a radical approach to independence. He was from South Kasai and that was a diamond rich area with lots of wealth that was possible

still. So it makes sense that he would want a more federated system. Yeah, we don't want to share everything with everybody. Right and that means that my area will retain autonomy within a larger DRC. Yeah, yeah. So in July of 1960, Kalanji declared South Kasai autonomous as a way of protecting, to protect Luba and Baluba Congol bias here. I am a huge Lumumba stan, and I have a hard time believing that Lumumba was looking to oppress them. Given everything that he has said, all the stuff that I've read that he has written, he is a nationalist through and through.

He's a pan nationalist, he's a pan Africanist. He very much is along that stripe. There there doesn't seem to be any. And this tribe will keep mining for us while we do this. It was everybody's wealth is for everybody. And so, yeah, I'm going to dig a little into that. OK. When you say that the other guy Kalangi Kalangi Kalangi Kalangi you say these names I can pronounce no problem

Yeah, French names. I didn't like yeah, well. It's because I think there's a like a threshold of foreignness Like maybe French ones the French ones is the uncanny valley for me. Yeah, not actually in reverse. Yeah, no, you're right. The French language is in a linguistic uncanny valley for you. But you're going to ask about Kalanji. Yeah, so Kalanji is a language that is in the middle of the Middle East.

And it's a language that is in the middle of the Middle East. And it's a language that is in a linguistic uncanny valley for you But you're gonna ask about Kalanji. Yeah, so Kalanji you say wanted a more federated system. Yes So presumably he would have been like okay. We're gonna have we're gonna have semi-autonomous like states Within within a broader Congo yes, and Lumumba's plan would have been within a broader Congo. Yes. And Lumumba's plan would have been... Congo for the Congolese.

Congo for the Congolese. We're all one big nation. Presumably with a stronger centralized government. A federal system, not a federated system. Okay, all right. Here's the best example I can come up with the moon bow wanted I'm not gonna say it was it was taken after this because it wasn't but he wanted essentially what Germany had Okay, right. Yeah, whereas Kalanji wanted the EU but for the the

Congo, okay. Yeah, I can follow that analogy. All right. Yeah Fair. Of the Congo. Okay, yeah, I can follow that analogy. All right. So, go ahead. No, that was basically it. Oh, okay. It was just clarifying what exactly kind of systems they were fighting over.

Right. Now, Kalanji, again, he had been a big mover and shaker in the MNC, but he seemed to be following the example of one Mois Shombe. Shombe was a Katangan, and he was a main leader in Katanga, which is the place where we now get all the materials that we need for our phones to work. You know, we should probably do an episode re-examining the Black Panther, Probably do an episode re-examining the Black Panther Because having Ulysses Claw be a South African who's going after a mineral that is found only in that region Mm-hmm. Hmm big feels. Mmm. Yeah, maybe I'll find somebody who's an expert on African futurism, too So hey, that'd be here that with Italian futurism

Okay, yeah, so anyway, but moist Shambaugh declared Katanga So, we can compare that with Italian futurism. Okay. Yeah. So anyway, but Moishambe declared Katanga, which is a huge resource-rich province, he declared it independent because he didn't like the loss of power that being equal amongst other Congolese would represent for him. And in my mind, this is actually proven.

This is not me speculating what he wanted. This is proven because Kalanji then declared himself god-king emperor of South Kasai. Yeah that's pretty, that's pretty sure. I'm showing the red flags pretty clearly there. Yeah, clearly there. Um, you know, what do you think? That a part of, because I mean, clearly there's some self, there's a significant dollop of self-serving going on here. Sure. But in addition to that, do you think it could also have on

some level, Ben, level been like him him being the product of a society in which the folks who had held the power which is to say the belgians had been feeding into these tribal feud or tribal rivalry oh they absolutely know playing you know and like I Need to screw those guys before they screw us There's some of that and and don't forget that before the Belgians showed up the Congo Basin Which is enormous Had plenty of different tribes living plenty of different lives in in proximity to each other against and with each other and you're going to have abrasions between different ethnic groups living there.

Well, there's going to be rivalries. I'm sure there are ancestral feuds and ancestral alliances and you know and loyalties, you know, and so yes all of that's there too, but the Belgians absolutely made sure that they started picking and choosing whom they favored as The reality of them leaving was getting closer. Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, you know Bonnie on a Terribly cynical awful kind of levels. That's totally what you're gonna do Well in the Belgians were really big specifically on saying see without us there was no civilization there Look how they are now and it's like fucker you unscrewed the light bulbs On your way out you took them with you that that is actually verifiably true

I'm not exaggerating that's that's that's one of my one of my favorite I don't know if you know like yeah favorite awful thing I get it yeah favorite I get it awful things yeah like bitch took the ice trays like right yeah from Steel's ice trays. You know yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know like what kind of? Psychotic asshole mm-hmm. You know oh yeah, well the Belgians when they were leaving their empire behind it's like a grown ass man Who's called King? Yeah Can we start there?

Like like leap like it's as if Leopold possessed all of them right on their way Fuck you Really? Or it's as though he was just the the the worst example But it's all fucked all the way down. Well, yeah so in 1959 the MNC split So, in 1959, the MNC split, but the MNCL, or Lumumba, had a much broader and more popular appeal and therefore it was more effective in the fight for independence. So I'm going back to 59 now.

A lot of this is going to happen after the Smurf comic came out, but I think it's important to note that the anti-black bias amongst most Belgians was just the water that they were swimming in Yeah, though I don't think that the Civil War in the Smurf village between black and blue Smurfs was Presaging or in any way an analysis of what happened in the Belgian Congo turned Democratic Republic of the Congo But it feels wrong to point out where that shit led as short as I'm it feels wrong not to point it out wrong to point out where that shit led as short as I'm it feels wrong not to point it out Uh, so as short as I'm gonna make it so the Belgian authorities

Arrested Lumumba again in October of 1959. They charged him with inciting a deadly riot Um, he was beaten and denied all sorts of things in prison while awaiting trial and the trial was set to start on January 18, 1960. Do you know what else was supposed to start on January 18, 1960? What? The Belgo Congolese round table conference in which Belgian political and business leaders would meet with Congolese political leaders to determine how fast, how, and when the shift from Belgian colony to sovereign nation would occur. Do you want to guess what city that was supposed to happen in? Where?

Brussels. You know, because there is no such goddamn thing as coincidence. Yeah. Like, you, Rick's. Right. You unbelievable shitheads. Right. Yeah.

So the main leader of the MNCL was in prison to be tried while his party went and made their case amongst other delegates. And this was absolutely an effort to cut the legs out from under the most pan-African and therefore most independent and unfuckwithable party in the Congo. Moreover other groups that did rely on extractive economic hopes, ethnic kinships and ethnic

rivalries would be easier to make side deals with in Brussels when they were isolated, pitted against each other, and so on, by those self-same Belgian political and business leaders who absolutely talked with Moist Chambe, who himself had been frozen out of several MNC large meetings and he did not let that shit go. Now, by December of 1959, the MNCL had already won

a ton of local elections in Congo, and thus the delegates in Brussels actually were able to secure Lumumba's release and his travel up to the conference, so he didn't miss the whole thing. Oh wow. So it's one of those like, no matter what odds you put in front of people if they yearn to be free They will fucking make it happen. Yeah, so I don't know the exact date that he made it to the conference in Brussels but I did find a picture of him there from January January 26th and

on January 27th They declared an independent Democratic Republic of the Congo which would be effective on January 27th, they declared an independent Democratic Republic of the Congo, which would be effective on June 30th, 1960. This meant elections would have to be held in May. These elections were elections which the MNCL won a plurality of, not a majority. But therefore a coalition government was needed to be set up. And so Lumumba becomes the prime minister and Joseph Kasevubu becomes president. Okay.

Now unfortunately this is not a happy ending story by any stretch. So shortly after, I mean if you look at the news, you're going to have to scroll a little bit because there's other things happening lately But what's been going on in in the DRC? Has been going on the entirety of my adult life in one way or another mm-hmm so But shortly after independence shit falls apart super hard, but the reason why will not surprise anyone Belgian fuckery. I want to highlight a couple of things that may have led to an increase in that fuckery. Now, to get there, I want you to listen to this speech by King Bedouin that was played

on the radio on January 13th, 1959. I don't have a good Belgian accent, so I'll just read it in English. The ultimate goal of our actions is in prosperity and peace to assist the Congolese people on their path to independence without delay but also without irresponsible rashness. In a civilized world, the independence of a nation symbolizes, combines, and guarantees the values of freedom, order, and prosperity. This goal, however, cannot be achieved without the following premises. Strong and fair governmental institutions.

A sufficient number of experienced government officials and clerks. A solid social, economic, and financial organization in the hands of experts in these fields. A broad intellectual and moral education of the people without which a democratic system will only be an excuse for ridicule, deception and oppression of the many by the few. We aim to create these conditions which are at the basis of true independence with the utmost care in a friendly and passionate cooperation together with our African citizens. It is not our intention to force European solutions onto the African peoples. On the contrary, we wish to promote the development of pragmatic policies and solutions

based on the African wish to promote the development of pragmatic policies and solutions based on the African culture. Sorry, repeated repeated that answer to the needs of the people so having heard that sounds mostly good right pretty cool mmm yeah it kind of paternalistic kind of but kinda but dudes a king yeah who's general king, who for four generations back, his relatives have been brutal ass colonizers. So it fits. He'd previously come to the Congo in 1954, I think, and he got a very different reception. This time people shouted, at that time it was like, whoa, yay, you're the king, yay, yay, yay. This time people shouted independence now at him,

whereas in 54 people shouted long live the king. So there's this increasing sentiment of black people shouting independence at the king. And that made it into the news in January of 59, which absolutely could have influenced Payo. Yes, yes, so absolutely. Yeah. Any any comments more on on his speech? I'll try to give you room for that.

Well, what what strikes me is all of the points that he's talking about sound like a checklist of, you know, and now look how these simple non-Europeans aren't able to do any of this. Look why they're lucky to have us here. Yes. Yes, yes. It's like, well, yes, we're giving them their independence, but I mean, really? You know what I mean? Like there's, there's, there's a, there's a very self-serving kind of standard being set.

Oh yeah, absolutely. That it's like, you know, as somebody, you know, in the 21st century listening to this, like, well, you haven't, you have actively worked to prevent them having any of those things. That part right there. You made sure that people couldn't rise up to certain levels of expertise.

Yeah, you have crippled them in terms of You know, he talks about experienced government ministers, right? Fuck you, but also how 1950s technocrat is that right? Oh, oh, you're right. Oh, yeah Incredibly so yeah, and and you know a broadly educated populace right Like how are you really working? How hard were you really working to maintain public schooling in in your colonial holdings like let's be real I'm just how many just give me give me a number of how many teachers you arrested

Yeah, you know when you're when you're rounding up revolutionaries, uh, speaking as a social studies teacher, I know there are things that are universal. So like, come on. How many, how many of my colleagues were you, were you jailing? Right. Um, questions, very good questions that pointed pointed question. Yes And then and then when you when you talked about the king visiting the country Mm-hmm, and I know I've mentioned this on the podcast before in the context of decolon decolonization But I Have a picture book a huge gigantic book photographs entitled the century picture book, a huge gigantic book of photographs entitled The Century. That's all about 20th century. And in the late 50s, early 60s, there are so many photos from Africa as the British

Empire is falling apart, as the Belgian Empire is falling apart. And one of the most powerful, one of the ones that has stuck with me the longest is an image and I wish I could remember the caption on it. I want to say it might have been the king. It was either the king or one of his high level ministers on a parade in the Congo, somewhere in Congo. And he's standing up, waving to the crowd like you do, and he's got the full colonial uniform on, the big pith helmet with the big plume of feathers coming off of it, all the medicines, the whole nine and

somebody from the crowd, a man from the crowd has run up and stolen his sword and is running away with it, holding it over his head. And, and the symbolism of that. Oh, it's beautiful and the end of the power in that photo is Absolutely amazing and I'm just I'm thinking back to that picture the whole time you're talking about this. Yeah, like look you Oh, you're gonna like this next part that especially. Yeah. All right, so I promised fuckery. Yes Here's the King's speech the King's speech Next part then, especially. Yeah, all right. So I promised Fuckery. Yes. Here's the King's speech, the King's speech. On June 30, 1960, when he's handing over the country to the people whose land it is, he

says, Mr. President, gentlemen, the independence of Congo is the end result of the work started with the exceptional personality of King Leopold II, which he tackled with determined courage and which has been continued with persistence by Belgium. You bite your tongue. I want you to hear the whole thing. the whole thing. It represents a defining moment in the destination, not only of Congo itself, but I have no hesitation in saying it, of all of Africa. For 80 years, Belgium has sent the best of its sons to your country, first to liberate the Congo Basin from the horrible slave trade that thinned out your populations, later to bring the different peoples who used to be enemies closer together and present themselves. Prepare to form together the largest of the independent African states.

Finally to bring a happier life to the different regions of Congo that you represent here in the same parliament. At this historic moment, our thoughts must turn to the pioneers of the emancipation of Africa, and those who after them made Congo what it is today. They deserve our admiration and your appreciation, for it was they who, by sacrificing their best strengths and even their lives to a great ideal, brought you peace and enriched your moral and material possessions. They must never be forgotten, either by Belgium or by the Congo. When Leopold II embarked on the great work that is being crowned today. He did not come here as a conqueror, but as a bringer of civilization. From the start, Congo has opened its borders to international trade without Belgium ever

exercising an exclusive right focused solely on its own interests. Congo has been given railroads, railways, all kinds of sea and airlines, which by connecting your populations with each other have promoted their unity and expanded the countries to the world. A medical service, which was set up several decades early, has been patiently organized and has delivered you from many devastating illnesses. Numerous and remarkably well equipped hospitals have been built. Agriculture has been improved and modernized. Major cities have been built and throughout the country living conditions and hygiene are showing remarkable progress.

Industrial companies have done justice to the natural resources of the soil. industrial companies have done justice to the natural resources of the soil. The expansion of economic activity has been significant and it has increased the prosperity of your population and has given the country the technicians indispensable to its development. Thanks to the missionary schools as well as those who established the public powers, basic education has expanded considerably and intellectual elite is forming and your universities will grow rapidly. An increasing number of qualified workers in agriculture, industry, crafts, commerce, administration are beginning to introduce into all walks of life the individual emancipation

that is the real basis of every civilization. We are pleased that in this way we have given Congo, despite its greatest difficulties, the indispensable resources that lie at the foundation of a country on the road to development. The great independence movement that is dragging the whole of Africa with it has found the greatest understanding among the Belgian government officials in the face of the United desire of your populations. We have not hesitated to grant you this independence from now on. It is up to you. It's quite all right.

It is up to you gentlemen to show now that we were right to trust you From now on Belgium and Congo are side-by-side as sovereign states But bound by friendship and decided to help each other today We therefore return to your hands the administrative economic Technical and social services as well as the judicial organization without which a modern state is not viable. The Belgian representatives are ready to lend you a loyal and open cooperation. Your task is immense and you are the first to realize it. The greatest dangers that threaten you are the inexperience of the population to govern

themselves. The tribal quarrels that have caused so much evil in the past and cannot start again at any cost, the attraction that foreign superpowers can exert in certain regions, ready to take advantage of the slightest sign of weakness. Your leaders will know the difficult task of governing. Whatever party they belong to, they will have to put the general interests of the country first of their concerns. They will have to teach the Congolese people that independence is not achieved through immediate pleasure gratification, but through work, through respect for that freedom of

others and the right of the minority, through tolerance and through order, without which there is no democratic regime can survive. I would like to pay a special tribute here to the armed forces who have accomplished their difficult task with courage and unwavering dedication. Independence will require effort and sacrifice from everyone.

You will have to adapt the settings to your views and needs in a way that makes them stable and balanced. You will need to form experienced administrative framework, intensify the intellectual and moral education of the population, maintain currency stability, protect your economic, social, and financial organizations. Do not jeopardize the future with hasty reforms and do not replace the institutions that Belgium hands over to you as long as you are not sure you can make better ones. Maintain with care the activities of the medical services, the interruption of which would have

disastrous consequences and reemerge those diseases which we have succeeded in suppressing them. Caring for the scientific work that constitutes an invaluable intellectual heritage for you. Do not forget that a serene and independent justice system is an element of social peace. The guarantee of respect for the right of all provides a state with great moral authority in international public opinion. Do not hesitate to contact us. We are ready to stand by your side to assist you with our counsel,

to train the technicians and officials you will need. Africa and Europe are mutually complementary and have been called together to the most brilliant development. Congo and Belgium can play a first-class role through constructive and fruitful cooperation and mutual trust. Gentlemen, the eyes of the world are on you. The moment Congo independently chooses its own way of life, I wish that the Congolese people may preserve and develop all their spiritual, all of their spiritual moral and religious values, values that are common and transcend political changes, racial differences or borders. Remain one and you will prove worthy to play the great

role you have been called to play in the history of Africa. People of Congo, my country and I, we recognize with joy and emotion that Congo is granted access on this day, June 30, 1960, in complete harmony and friendship with Belgium to independence and international sovereignty may God protect Congo Okay, are we done yeah, okay First of all mother fucker. Oh very fucking dare you right um Which was there like part you quibbled with nothing nothing but the audacity oh my god nothing but the audacity worthy of

our trust fuck you oh oh you know what that's that small fucking potatoes I'm sorry we gifted you the rail lines and the airlines and all the roads and I'm sorry motherfucker who bled and died to build those Mm-hmm I want to know how many people in the audience South Indians How many how many people in that audience were missing left hands Probably not that many to be honest because people in that audience would have been so the audience are you talking about people in that hall? In that hall in people our age and a little bit younger, right? And so that would have been two generations removed from all the fucking hand chopping that the Bell yeah

You know your point stands still within within within you know living memory you know and We cultural memories even longer than that mm-hmm And then the best of its sons sentiment all of that shit all right your Kipling called and said yo yo I meant that for the Philippines. What are you doing? Yeah? Yo, yo, I meant that for the Philippines. What are you doing? Yeah Roger simply called and went you know what too far. Yeah too far. No, yeah I'm sorry. I was an imperialist. You're an asshole

No, no, no, no You know from the great beyond I now have context I recognize I was a racist but Europe Rick No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm Belgium said hey, this is ours now they absolutely did say we are protecting these people from the British slave trade and More importantly, they said we're well actually they didn't say that because the British slave trade it ended by the end And we're protecting these people from the Arabian slave trade. Yeah, it was the specter of dark Enslaving other yeah Yeah, and and and even and even then even then I'm not going to say it was a crock of shit But it was a very thin cover Oh huge. Yeah, just like like it is the veneer. It was a scrim Yeah of bullshit. Yeah, and and you know, I keep coming back to you know We gave you this we gave you this with motherfucker

Who built all of it? Like who right who did the labor? Who and was living here like yeah and to what end like all of this high high minded sounding? Rhetoric is like no jackass you were you were literally bleeding this country for everything you could pull out of it right you were treating this whole country like one gigantic rubber tree yeah you were you were you were poking a hole in it yes and sucking the juice out for everything you could take right all the extractive economy you could do. And so, well, when Leopold came here, you brought civilization. It's like, no, thanks then. Fuck you. Wow. Like, yeah. I'm reminded, and that immediately brings me to kind of in the same, this is 10 years

later than roughly when this quote is, but somebody asking Mahatma Gandhi What do you think of Western civilization in his brilliant response? I think it would be a good idea right Sounds nice. Give it a shot. Yeah. Hey, how about you try it jackass? So just like just so much just like oh my god Yeah, all the all the audacity right and and just like So much also big thanks to the army here It's like yeah, it's I mean honestly. This is the the the acne of gaslighting, right? Oh, this is yeah, you know and this is for your own good. Yeah. And the funny thing about it is.

There's there's kind of a. Self gas lighting going on. You know, there is an awful lot of, you know, we're going to justify. Yeah, alcohol calories don't count. It like has that vibe As I'm drinking a beer, okay, yeah No, no no it's it's a stout it's not no

Not tonight. I know and even well all right anyway. We'll move on to a different topic Yes, personally uncomfortable on a moral level damn it but like, you know the level of Yeah justification. Mm-hmm of like no. No. No, we we had to do this and You know as someone who came to an understanding of all, you know, later, and, you know, as an adult, like who, who grew up in the kind of environment where I would have read, you know, as a junior in high school or a senior in high school, I would have read a speech like that and I'm like, well, yeah, okay.

You know, right. Now all I can think of is even, you know, how many of the actual Congolese in the audience for this speech were just sitting there stone-faced like, oh, you fucker. Well, you know what I mean? You would ask that because the next person to give a speech was Patrice Lumumba. Oh, baby. Okay. I'm ready. Here's his. Okay. to give a speech was Patrice Lumumba. Oh baby. Okay, I'm ready.

Okay. Now, he uses the masculine and the feminine and it, so obviously all of this was in French, but he uses the masculine and the feminine, which sounds better where he says Congolais, Congolais. I love that, it's got a lyrical quality to it, but here's the English translation. Men and women of the Congo.

Victorious independence fighters, I salute you in the name of the Congolese government. I ask all of you my friends who tirelessly fought in our ranks to mark this June 30, 1960 as an illustrious date that will be forever, that will be ever engraved in your hearts. A date whose meaning you will proudly explain to your children, so that they in turn might relate to their grandchildren and great-grandchildren, the glorious history of our struggle for freedom. Although this independence of the Congo is being proclaimed today by an agreement with Belgium, an amicable country, with which we are on equal terms. No Congolese will ever forget that independence was one in struggle, a persevering and inspired struggle carried on from day to day, a struggle in which we were undaunted by privation or suffering and stinted neither strength nor blood.

It was filled with tears. You cannot be gaslit, my brothers and sisters. It was filled with tears, fire and blood. We are deeply proud of our struggle because it was just and noble and indispensable in putting an end to the humiliating bondage forced upon us. That was our lot for the eighty years of colonial rule and our wounds are too fresh and much too painful to be forgotten. We have experienced forced labor in exchange for pay that did not allow us to satisfy our hunger, to clothe ourselves, to have decent lodgings, or to bring up our children as dearly loved ones. Morning, noon, and night we were

subjected to jeers, insults, and blows because we were, he uses the word for black in Spanish, is the word for black in Spanish, ends, who will ever forget that the black was addressed as two, not because he was a friend, but because the polite vu was reserved for the white man. We have seen our land seized in the name of ostensibly just laws, which gave recognition only to the right of might. We have not forgotten that the law was never the same

for the white and the black, and that it was lenient to the ones and cruel and inhuman to the others. We have experienced the atrocious sufferings, being persecuted for political convictions and religious beliefs, and exiled from our native land. Our lot was worse than death itself. We have not forgotten that in the cities the mansions were for the whites and the tumbled-down huts for the blacks, that a black was not admitted to the cinemas, restaurants and shops set aside for Europeans, that a black travelled in the holds under the feet of the whites in their luxury cabins. Who will ever forget the shootings—and when he does this he's saying, ki, ki, ki, which

is just really good's really good. Who will ever forget the shootings which killed so many of our brothers or the cells into which we were mercilessly thrown, or into which we're mercilessly thrown, those who no longer wish to submit to the regime of injustice, oppression, and exploitation used by the colonialists as a tool of their domination.

All that, my brothers, brought us untold sufferings. But we who were elected by the votes of your representatives, representatives of the people, to guide our native land, we who have suffered in body and soul from the colonial oppression, we tell you that henceforth all that is finished with. The Republic of the Congo has been proclaimed and our beloved country's future is now in the hands of its own people. Brothers, let us commence together a new struggle, a sublime struggle that will lead our country to peace, prosperity, and greatness.

Together we shall establish social justice and ensure for every man a fair remuneration for his labor. We shall show the world what the black man can do when working in liberty, and we shall make the Congo the great pride of Africa. We shall see to it that the lands of our native country truly benefit its children. We shall revise the old laws and make them into new ones that will be just and noble. We shall stop the persecution of free thought. We shall see to it that all citizens enjoy the fullest extent of the basic freedoms provided

by the Declaration of Human Rights. We shall eradicate discrimination, whatever its origin, and we shall ensure for everyone a station in life befitting his human dignity and worthy of his labor and his loyalty to the country. We shall institute in the country a peace resting not on guns and bayonets, but on concord and goodwill. And in all this, my dear compatriots, we can rely not only on our own enormous forces and immense wealth, but also on the assistance of the numerous foreign states, whose cooperation we shall accept when it is not aimed at imposing upon us an alien policy,

but is given in spirit of friendship. Even Belgium, which has finally learned lesson of history and need no longer try to oppose our independence, is prepared to give us aid and friendship. For that end, an agreement has just been signed between our two equal and independent countries. I am sure that this cooperation will benefit both countries. For our part, we shall, while remaining vigilant, try to observe the engagements we have freely

made. Thus, both in the internal and the external spheres, the new Congo being created by my government will be rich, free, and prosperous. But to attain our goal without delay, I ask all of you, legislators and citizens of the Congo, to give us all the help you can. I ask you to sink your tribal quarrels. They weaken us and may cause us to be despised abroad. I ask you all not to shrink from any sacrifice for the sake of ensuring the success of our

grand undertaking. Finally, I ask you unconditionally to respect the life and property of fellow citizens and foreigners who have settled in our country. If the conduct of these foreigners leaves much to be desired, our justice will promptly expel them from the territory of the Republic. If on the contrary, their conduct is good, they must be left in peace, for they too are working for our country's prosperity. The Congo's independence is a decisive step toward the liberation of the whole African

continent. Our government, a government of national and popular unity, will serve its country. I call on all Congolese citizens, men and women and children, to set themselves resolutely to the task of creating a national economy and ensuring our economic independence. Eternal glory to the fighters for national liberation. Long live independence and African unity. Long live the independent and sovereign Congo. independent and sovereign Congo. Nice. Yeah. Yeah. That is number one.

I really appreciate the, uh, very direct. Outer. Yeah. So where the history gives us, you know? Yeah. Well, you know, I wonder, I genuinely wonder when, cause I'm sure that when whoever wrote the King's speech was writing the King's speech, their, their thought process, their core agenda was, I mean, like we said before, it was justification Molification like let's look gracious on our way out. Let's let's look gracious on our way out, you know

And I have to think that Lumumba or whoever wrote a speech. That was Lumumba speech Who told him don't don't don't just let it's like let the dog finish humping your leg kind of argument like he's like Oh, really just let them leave with their fucking Kasububu he very much wanted an independent Congo to right so he's the president Yeah, he very much wanted an independent Congo as well He's not he's not a betrayer to the cause by any stretch No, no, no, but no was like, just let them have their illusions and just let them go.

Just be chill. Yeah, like let them leave gracefully and they'll think whatever and then we can get the real work done. And Lumumba was like, oh hell no. Fuck that. Especially after what that motherfucker just did. Like I don't think he had two speeches ready.

I think he always only had this speech ready Yeah, but after what better win said Yeah, oh yeah. Yeah, like fuck you. Yeah, like all the way. Yeah. Yeah the way back to Brussels like Yeah, um and the Only one of us up here today has been beaten by your soldiers anyone want to guess yeah In the last two years anybody no just me okay. Yeah, just yeah Yeah

Like he he had to know that that was gonna be what The king was gonna say on his way out mm Mm-hmm. And so like consciously writing this right as a Mmm. No. No here's everybody here Everybody here knows exactly what has actually happened Yeah, everybody here knows that's a steaming pile of garlicky bullshit. Yes

Like we all know it No, fuck that you know um You don't get to lie on your way out Yeah, no you you you don't you don't get to try to gaslight all of us about what you did You know well you know you're you're just you're being so dramatic about it no I'm not I'm not fuck you you know and you're right in history almost never gives us a moment like that and yeah and there's something something genuinely delicious about like, Oh, so satisfying. Oh, so nice. Yeah. That's so good. And you know, um, this is one of those reasons why, as much as I, I usually don't give a rat's ass about soccer anytime an African country gets

far enough to wind up going up against a former colonial power. Mm-hmm I'm I'm a hundred and ten percent rooting for the Like no, no, no, no they they Carmichael II this win like I don't sport sports ball. Whatever. I don't I don't give a shit Who's got the better team whatever no no no I'm I'm rooting for the ones who kick your asses out in the 60s. Yeah full stop We're done. Yeah, because because it's going to be more meaningful to them

I have a list of like things that I'm afraid of and they're ranked and then I have a list of schools That need to have their names changed and they're right Yes, I have a list of who who I root for when it comes to international sports Yeah, you know and it's in their ranked. You know, it's like yeah so Yeah, it's Now how very fucking dare you right sir, and and then oh here comes here comes the rejoinder. It's coming back very fucking dare you write sir and and then oh here comes here comes her joiner It's coming back around. Oh you

You thought that I was just gonna let you go no Now it's my turn it's like it's like one of the few occasions on which there was an actual rap battle in history mm-hmm Now this was delivered in French by the way and on the radio So there is no mistaking His intent to the Belgians in attendance and listening around the world Wow, and my favorite part is that better win had to sit there and fucking take it. Just, and he did. So bad. Now Time Magazine said this, quote, but new premier Patrice Lumumba, jealous of the limelight everyone else was enjoying, took an opportunity to launch a vicious attack on the departing

Belgian rulers. Slavery was imposed on us by force, he cried, as the king sat shocked and pale. We have known ironies and insults. We remember the blows that we had to submit to morning, noon and night because we were ends. Deeply offended, King Bedouin was ready to board his plane and return to Brussels forthwith. Only the urgings from his ministers persuaded him to change his mind. So, I know. His feces got hurt for being, being, being called out on his genocide. Oh, generational genocide got you down. Yeah. Yeah. How mean of him.

Now here's more from Time magazine. Well, Moise Shambé, premier of rich Katanga province, whose mines provide 60% of the Congo's income, still threatened to secede rather than hand the province's revenues over to a powerful central government. The Katanga cow will not be milked by Lumumba's serpents, cried the secessionists. And reportedly they had the encouragement of some white businessmen. Well no shit they had the encouragement.

Almost on the head. Like like you you ran full speed into the point and all you managed to do was give yourself a fucking concussion. Yes. Right. But I just I just love that well the feelings of the king are central to this article. It's like Okay, yeah, okay, yeah, you know but the fucking liberal media Mm-hmm. This is Time magazine by the way

Yeah, though I know now what followed was all sorts of retaliatory fuckery that even time said was coming though, right time called it to begin with When they left the Belgians When they left the Belgians unscrewed the light bulbs like I keep saying in all of the civic buildings and brought them home to Belgium by early January of Belgium. By early January of 1961, the Belgian general, is it 61? God damn it, I get my years wrong. I think it's 61. The Belgian general in charge of the army still caused a huge crisis at Camp Leopold by demeaning his black troops, like had them all muster out and literally wrote before independence equals after independence. In other words, I'm still in charge. You're

still my soldiers. You're going to do what I say. This is at Camp Leopold, by the way. So he did. Speaking of someplace needing a renaming. Right. Now this leads to an uprising amongst the Congolese troops and ultimately leads to Lumumba sacking General Janssen's. But the damage had already been done. People were held down for so long and given such minimal proximity to white power in the military. They were just fucking done with it.

And so Lumumba's efforts to mollify the rebellion fell very unevenly. And as such, the rebellion seeped into the south, where Shambé's influence was more strongly felt. Lumumba and Kassavubu then went on a tour to promote black commanders, but the Belgian government immediately mobilized 6,000 Belgian troops to protect Belgian lives in this new country. Now this was not unfounded because the mutiny

and attacks on white Europeans in Elizabethville had led to a few dozen European deaths, like things were seeping out and getting worse. Well, yeah. Had it coming, could have seen this coming, and Belgium was very quick to overreact. Yeah. So, so instead of treating the DRC like an equal, as the king had promised, Belgians stepped in and added another wrinkle.

And this is its own problem because one of the people that Lumumba had appointed over the objection of some of his advisors was a man named Joseph Mobutu who had been a former sergeant who had possible connections to the Belgian intelligence operatives. And Mobutu as a new colonel put down the mutinies and did it brutally. So now the Lumumba is being tagged with like the brutality of Mobutu and he's scolding Mobutu and Mobutu is like who's got the army here and so there's it is an untenable situation meanwhile Europeans are fleeting to fleeing to Katanga and Shambay's territory, right? While Belgian Navy bombards the main seaport of the DRC, a place called Matadi. And they did, they

bombarded this, they shelled the fucking city. And they did this after the Europeans had already left Matabi. And they killed almost two dozen Congolese. Matabi and they killed almost two dozen Congolese. So part of me, there's a part of my brain that always asks the math question like okay at what point is enough enough for you okay you feel like you are owed reprisal how much is the number one to one is the number two to one is it four to one? Tell me the number be that crass So we can at least hold your feet to the fire or we could at least argue about how inhumane that is Yeah, so this to me is like, okay. This is proportional response. I mean, it's not you're attacking a sovereign nation Yeah, but in your adult fucking white supremacist mind you got 12 after they got 12 you're gonna call it good

And of course they didn't so then the Belgian American French and other interests started dealing with chambé in secret By July 11th moist chambé declared independence from the DRC and he declared himself the leader of Katanga This had the support of Belgian business interests and thus it was supported by European interests. And because of this, on July 14th, DRC broke off diplomatic relations with Belgium. Now that's a big fucking deal. Yeah.

Lumumba then goes to Washington DC and met with the Secretary of State on July 27th, 1960. I'm sorry, so this is all 1960. of State on July 27th, 1960. I'm sorry, so this is all 1960. He meets with Christian Hurtner, or Hurtter, H-E-R-T-E-R. And 60, this is Eisenhower? July of 60, so yes, still Eisenhower. Now Christian Hurtter, who served as a bridge between John Foster Dulles and Dean Rusk so Dulles steps down Herder steps in and then Rusk takes over right?

Okay, just like real short period of time there, right? Herder told Lumumba that the only aid that he could get from the US would be from the UN Like we can't give you direct aid But we give the UN a lot of money. It can come that way. Okay. Lumumba then asked and he then went to the Canadian embassy, asked for aid, got a similar response. Only after the US and Canada said, best we can do is going through the UN and then that's gonna be a whole process

and Belgium gets a vote. Only after that did he go to the Soviet Union and ask for any help. Right. Okay. So who he went to first. Who drove him into the arms of the USSR. Right.

Meanwhile, the UN had been getting heavy influence by Belgium, who managed to paint the DRC and Lumumba personally as anti Belgian, anti white and anti Western. And I'm part of me is like, if anybody had a reason. Like, like, okay. Even if all of that was true, right. Even if all of that was true, right even if all of that was true Yeah, put on your big boy pants like stop being butthurt and like come on. Yeah

Yeah, so they also painted him as a dangerous communist Which of course made the Western nations Who literally refused to help start getting like whoa, he's a communist who literally refused to help, start getting like, whoa, he's a communist. Now what followed after that was a total collapse of the government, highlighted by a failed consolidation. Casa Vubu illegally dismisses Lumumba from his position.

Lumumba then illegally dismisses Casa Vubu from his position, and ultimately there's a peaceful revolution, in finger quotes, to restore order, led by one Joseph Mobutu. Of course. And he installed technicians to get the government going again. And again, the government is collapsing. It absolutely is.

And you know, when shit like this happens, somebody will come in and promise order and people will just be grateful for that, right? So yeah, because I mean, at the end of the day, for ordinary people, yeah, they need to be able to draw a paycheck, pay the rent, keep food on the table, right? You know, they need a roof over their heads and a food and food on the table and all of it's really easy to stick to democratic principles when you're not hungry right getting getting back to like living your ethics is easy yeah you know when when you create a situation which like I mean the Belgians totally dead when you create a situation in In which chaos is almost inevitable, right? Like I mean there there was a way

that if everybody had listened to the best angels of their nature and if Everybody had played every one of their cards, right? And if everybody out outside of the Congo had acted with enlightened self-interest or had just lived up to their own professed ideals we yeah you know if people had just acted in good faith this shit would yeah yeah I'm not even gonna demand that I'm just gonna say think long-term and enlightened self-interest Like yeah, that's you know But yeah, who's in charge at the State Department? That's not who had previously been in charge like yeah, let's be real. Yeah Yeah, yeah, even even if

But were or rather I should say unless all of those things Happened mm-hmm. This was a situation that was gonna go down the shitter. Yeah, and And the Belgians had engineered it that way like, you know the king being all Bullshit mm-hmm bullshit and the Belgian government probably boarding that narrative too. Yeah. Yeah, you were probably pissed off Surely because you expected everybody to be slobbering all over your your parts but like You you knew? That you were supporting what's his name down in the south you knew

Yeah, you were on the way out doing everything you could and you know what even if lamova haven't hadn't given that speech They were gonna pull all the fucking light bulbs, and that's symbolic of just how much they wanted They need it to sabotage. Yeah, they needed it to fail It's like oh my Yeah so It's like, oh my god. Yeah. So, Mobutu restores order, he installs technicians to get the government going again, and he totally nullifies the democratically elected government that both Kasa Vubu and Lumumba had represented.

Now this leads to Lumumba being put on house arrest as Mobutu aligned more with the more malleable Kasa Vubu from about September of 1960 onward. Remember, Congo was a free nation June 30. Yeah. Okay. So, oh, by the way, I think I misspoke. I think I said in January Janssons had done this. He had done this shit in July. So it's J month Okay, that's why I thought it was like 1961 for a second like January Okay, so in November of 1960 the UN chose to recognize this new government the United Nations recognized the new government

Set into place by Joseph Mubutu in his essential coup, right? Despite the fact that there was no democratic effort in its creation. On December 7th, the Soviet Union insisted that the United Nations seek Lumumba's immediate release as well as the resignation of the United Nations Secretary General Dag Hammarskjöldj, along with Lumumba's restoration to power, the removal of Belgian troops and the removal of UN troops. So the Soviet Union, December 7th is like, all right, y'all, these things need to happen.

You need to absolutely get Lumumba out of prison. You need, and then they need to absolutely get Lumumba out of prison. You need and then they point to the UN General Secretary and like you, Dag, you got to go. And y'all after you get Lumumba out and he bounces, you need to put Lumumba back in power because he was the legally elected person. And after that, you got to take your Belgian troops and get them the fuck out of there. And after that, we got to get your Belgian troops and get them the fuck out of there and After that we got to get the UN troops out of there. Let them have their own country, right? So when guys like William Appleman Williams say that the Cold War was a smokescreen for predatory capitalism This is the shit that he's talking about

Yeah Because the Soviet Union is 100% right here. They were roundly defeated. Now this paved the way for Belgium to aid in Lumumba's murder. He was moved to a barracks along with two political associates who he placed a ton of trust in. Maurice Mpolo and Joseph Okito. In January of 61 he was transported to Elizabethville, which is in Katanga. The three were released for a few hours, then they were recaptured, beaten badly, and then

murdered in the late night of January 17th, early morning of January 18th, it's kind of fuzzy, by Moist Chambé's men specifically. Now, I'm going to fast forward to 2018 for a second. On September 11th, 2018, the Brussels Times Magazine released a story detailing the role of Belgium in all of this. Here's the part that matters to this narrative. Lumumba alongside Okito and Mumpolo, was killed in the presence of Katongi's Katongi's president Shambé two Katongi's ministers as well as Belgian officials and police officers three separate firing squads were reported to have been assembled and commanded by a Belgian Captain Julian Gatt.

Another... Let's see, I'm just seeing if this is still part of the quote. Yeah, it still is. Another Belgian police commissioner, Franz Verschure, was in overall command. The bodies were thrown into a quickly hollowed out pit. The next morning, Katongi's Minister of the interior, Godfroyd Munongo, ordered Belgian police officer Gerard Souette to make the bodies disappear. Souette has described the gruesome acts of hacking up the bodies and destroying them by acid and fire.

So that's a Belgian newspaper magazine reporting on it in 2018. Now more from this article is there was an entire book written by a guy named Ludo DeWitt, which of course, that's going to be what I'm recommending soon. It's called The Assassination of Lumumba. And this this book by Ludo DeWitt sparked an internal Belgian commission. So this is a real mover and shaker kind of thing. DeWitt laid the entire assassination at Belgium's feet's feet and and as you heard there were belgian officials Present and in command Yeah, and and it's shanbe's now notably mobutu's men are missing from this

But that's okay. Shambé is acting as a proxy for him Now here's what and and as a result Mobutu is able to wrap himself in the martyrdom of Lumumba to legitimize the beginning of his reign from about 65 onward because there's some shit that happens from 61 65 but here's what the magazine reported quote parliamentary report stated that Belgium acted under pressure of the Belgian public or I'm sorry, the Belgian public which had heard for no under the Belgian public. Sorry, there is a group called the Force Publique, but that's that's a military force. The Belgian public, which had heard for days about violence against Belgian citizens in

Congo. According to wide sections of the population one person was held responsible Prime Minister Patrice Lumumba. The public demanded a very strong response from the government. Now just real quick I'm gonna break in here. Notice who he is pointing out is clamoring for Lumumba's punishment in some way. It's the Belgian public. Yeah. This is not just the king and a few of his followers. This is the Belgian public.

Rather apologetically, the report urges readers to see the developments in the light of the Cold War in the 1960s with different standards, ethics, and norms. It points out that the colonization in the Congo was quickly enacted and was unforeseen by Belgium, despite the fact that other African nations with different standards, ethics, and norms. It points out that decolonization in the Congo was quickly enacted and was unforeseen by Belgium, despite the fact that other African nations had already gained independence. It confirms that, after Congo had become sovereign and independent on 30 June 1960, this did not step Belgium and a number of other countries from intervening

directly in its internal affairs, even when the non-intervention principle was already part of international legislation in the 1960s. Because of the presence of large numbers of Belgian officers and officials, a close connection between Congo and Belgium remained. More importantly, a large majority of these felt they were expected to play an important role in the construction of the new state.

The government did not always completely keep them informed. After the complete split between both governments, Belgium attempted to influence the creation of a new government. Minister of Foreign Affairs Pierre Wigny sent a diplomat to Congo to plan a coup. Just pausing for a second. They... They attempted to influence the creation of a new government. Sounds very different than they planned a fucking coup. Yeah. One is like, hey, you guys wanna make sure you have a department of education,

and you know, we'd really like if you did this kind of book because it talks about how great the king was. Yeah. That's very different than sent somebody to plan a coup. And back to the article. And Minister Ganshoff van der Meers, his fucking names, who was in charge of the transition period in Congo

sent a state security agent to work behind the scenes to destabilize Congo. The report states that the Belgian government showed little respect for the sovereign status of the Congolese government. By aiding Katanga, no shit. Like all of this is like, wow, you all wanted to fuck it from the beginning. Like oh yeah.

Oh yeah. By aiding Katanga, it favored a confederal reorganization of Congo. The commission confirmed that secret funds about 7 million euro today managed by the Ministry of African Affairs were used to finance that policy against the Lumumba government. In Katanga, so they're paying, they're putting their money on the line to fuck this government from the jump. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, so like, but like this is this is the evidence. This is like it is clear. It is there. It's not even like, oh, we just you know, the odds are no, it's fucking right there. Yeah. In Katanga, the actions were supported by the Union Minier, Belgian mining company, which tried to finance military or paramilitary groups. The Belgian actions gained momentum during the second half of August 1960. The report indicates that Belgian general Consulate in Brazzaville was encouraging the opposition or providing logistic support. Belgian Prime Minister Guston Askins asked President Kassevoubou to sack Lumumba and was given legal

advice to do so. So again just breaking in here the the The Belgian general consulate is telling the president of another sovereign nation to sack his prime minister Yeah, okay extensively. I mean, I don't know How the parliamentary structure was supposed to work in Congo, but like under certain circumstances, that would be his boss. Like in many ways they are co holders because remember it is a coalition government. Right, right. So the report sees the Belgian actions as one element in a wider group of opposition forces.

The split between the Congolese Prime Minister and UN Secretary-General is considered crucial. The Commission saw little success of a Belgian or even American intervention without the existence of internal opposition within Congo itself. Congo was a vast country and extremely diverse on all levels. After supporting the deposition of Lumumba, Belgium was eager to prevent him from returning to power, says the report. Therefore, they insisted on his arrest. Mobutu was only prepared to do so until a Belgian promised to provide technical and military support to ANC. ANC is the military force.

The report also states that it was absolutely clear that there were plans to kill Lumumba, and that there were no trace of an order to rescind these plans. It was certain that the Belgian government tried to take Lumumba prisoner and transfer him to Katanga. More importantly, there were no signs of concern about the physical safety of Patrice Lumumba. After he was arrested, the Belgian government never insisted on a trial. The report noted that no one should be taken prisoner except on the order of a judge or after a decision of the court. King Badawin was aware of a letter from Major Guy Weber,

military advisor to Shambé, noting that the life of Lumumba was in danger. However, no evidence has been found that either the government or the competent ministers were informed of this letter According to the report there is no evidence that the Belgian counselors in Katanga were involved with or I'm sorry Yeah counselors in Katanga were involved with or consulted during the decision-making process that led to his execution The execution was carried out under the authority, leadership, and supervision of the Katangan authorities by Katangan gendarmes or police officers in the presence of a Belgian police commissioner and three Belgian officers. However, at no time did the Belgian government protest the unlawful execution of Lumumba, Mpolo, and Okito. Even later on, with some members of

the government aware of the execution, any knowledge of the fate of Lumumba was still denied when confronted by public opinion or during private meetings with NATO partners. Following the report, the Belgian government admitted in 2002 to having had an, quote, undeniable responsibility in the events that led to Lumumba's death. However, the government did not take full responsibility and issued a public pardon of the Belgians involved in the assassination of Lumumba. So, the black Smurfs didn't lead to Lumumba's death by any stretch, but the specific use of

black to contrast the blue in the Smurfs in 1959 certainly does seem to be a trace of the anti-black bias found in Belgium at that specific time. Yeah. In this iteration, we were also introduced to specific Smurfs with specific personalities and predilections for the first time. Shroomf's Alunets, brainy smurf. Shroomf beta, clumsy smurf. And Shroomf far care, jokey smurf. Okay. And I think I'm gonna leave it there because that will take us to December of 1959. But I really wanted to include that stuff about Lumumba because it's not, it's again, it is anachronistic to what I'm talking about, except that both things are

born of the same culture in Belgium. The people who ended up yelling and screaming for Lumumba's punishment in Belgium were the ones who would be reading this. Yeah. That anti-black bias, that, you know, we are cool up here in Belgium and when we hear that bad shit happened to Belgians, then we're going to be upset about the people that we hold responsible without really thinking about it That mentality yeah, I think I think I hope I think it comes through Yeah, so It does

I think what? What has become clear? Mm-hmm in in a great many cases, but I think most, that's what I'm looking for, not strikingly, but like most obviously now that we have 60 years of history between now and then, 60 years of separation and enough people have died and You know enough stuff has has happened that we are now able to get To you know hidden documents and things that were that people were hush hush about. Mm-hmm You know with the weird

paradoxical way in in modern history particularly particularly, that distance brings clarity because the details become clearer with more chronological distance. The obvious and pervasive, and and like Curvasive I guess is the word I'm hunting for Sabotage That I mean the Belgians in particular, but I mean when when we had our guest on to talk about the great Hanoi rat hunt. Hey that same thing came to mind too. Yeah, you know the the kind of like oh well Yeah, okay. Here's your too. Yeah, you know the the kind of like oh, well, yeah, okay Here's your country fuck you right you know from from European powers as they were as they were letting go of their colonial Possessions you know as we're letting people have their homelands back

You know the ways in which was like well, you know, I mean if we can't keep screwing you over, we're going to screw you over. Like, what? You know, and the, the pervasiveness of the racism and the pervasiveness of the euro white supremacy of it all it's just now so glaringly obvious, yeah, and You know it it it is still We're still dealing with repercussions of it because I mean think about under the last presidential administration when when repercussions of it because I mean, think about under the last residential administration, when when romp, I'll just name him, talked about shithole countries and it's like, why

are those why? Why are those countries disadvantaged? Why are those countries poor? Why are those countries riven with internal ethnic strife it's because that shit was either generated like completely generated or was exacerbated by colonial powers while they were in control and then as a final fuck you on their way out mm-hmm It's like these countries are shitholes because European powers made them that way right? so like it's it's You know the fact that we're that we're still seeing the aster effects of this literally two generations later

Mm-hmm three generations. I'm trying to remember. I think now we're the third generation later. Yeah. Like, you know, um, it's, it's, it's boggling. It's, it just, it leaves one a gog at the sheer penniness of it. Yeah. There really is just the sheer smallettiness of it. Yeah, there really is.

Just the sheer smallness of it all. Like, you know. And I don't think you can get that kind of petty smallness on an institutional level without the white supremacy. This is not just personality disorders. You know, this is not just insufficient personalities in charge of shit. No, no, no turns out They're not the best of Belgium

Or or maybe they were But no, you know, um Yeah, I Belgium's wealth is is due largely to American infusion of capital But let's not forget that it's not until 1960 that they let go in any way of their colonial holdings in Congo. And they still are grabbing and hanging on after that too. Oh, well, they're, they're like, like a dependency. Yeah. Like privately amongst themselves. They're still dealing with it like okay well you know

We got it. We got to figure out what we're gonna. Do about this. It's like dude. They're their own goddamn country Well to me it is figure out shit it yeah It feels like more like they feel entitled to that yeah, you know well. That's kind of what I meant, but yeah Yeah, that's a that's maybe a clearer way of explaining it. Yeah. They they still believe that it's like, well, you know, yeah, they're they're running their own government, but they're not really right. Like we're still ours. Yeah. And we're going to we're going to, we're going to figure out ways to manipulate it, to, to get what we want, you know? And it's just, it's, yeah, it's the, it's the fucking smallness of it. The gratuitous cruelty of it. Like, okay, let's, let's imagine for a moment that you have the idea in your head that you are somehow superior because of your race to these people.

Mm hmm. Like, okay, well, if you are, then shouldn't you be genuinely doing everything in your power to help them? Instead of doing everything in your power to keep them? See, I was right. Yeah. Yeah. Like, what does that say about you morally? Like, if you-

It's the Karl Rove effect. They're not gonna ask how you did it. They're just gonna see that you won Yeah Yeah, and and that's and and and I think that that point is really it's it's a win-lose thing It's a I can't let you but I I have this idea that I am superior. So no matter what I can't let you win, right? Like I have to always just have the last word. I have to always be the one Exactly, you know was part of the reason why? Lumpumpa's speech pissed off the jakes so much It was so totally not. Yeah. No, I'm not letting you do that. Right? Yeah

It was like, yeah, aren't you just supposed to thank me and let me go like we all know we all know and it's like no No No And and in many ways that like probably closed the door on them ever thinking that He should be allowed to live Because how dare this black man stand up to a king a white king a white king Yeah, you know it just yeah, and again. It's like I'm just always amazed that there's a fucking king in 1960 like really of the Belgians

Okay, like Yeah, and and that's the damage that he wanted to do. I'm like god, you know If I was the king of anywhere, I would just sit really quietly and I'd come out when you like need a ribbon cut Yeah, and just be really grateful for you know, the the book allowance that I got. Yeah, like Yeah, cool. I am I am in a position where my job is 99 percent ceremonial. I am supported through the largesse of my own government. Right. And I re and I'm, and I'm, and other than that,

I'm also from a family that's wealthy enough. I'm never going to have to work a day in my fucking life. Right. You know what? I'm going to keep my head down and be as inoffensive as I can to many, to everybody possible. And that's it. And that's it. But he didn't. So, you know. But he didn't. So, and as a result, an entire country got destabilized.

Yeah. From the outset then was allowed to have a dictator for 30 years and then Yeah, and you went into six part civil wars Yeah, you kept saying mobile to mobile to mobile. Yeah, like where have I heard that name before? He turned into a go to sasis. Hey go. Yes like Yeah Yeah, yes He turned into me but to say, say, say, say, go. Yes. Like, yeah, son of a bitch. Yeah. Yes.

Like, oh, great. That guy, that guy. Yeah. Yeah. So wonderful. Anyway, what you're reading. Uh, um, well, what I'm, what I'm reading right now actually, um, is a rare occasion on which I get, I get to talk about my job as an English teacher and you know

Not be a jerk about it. I Actually have to get the book off my shelf here I'm reading booked by Kwame Alexander and it is a Wonder if it is a rare example of a young adult novel that I don't hate It's about a young man who is a soccer player and is dealing with a difficult situation in his family. And it is a novel written as a series of poems. Nice. written as a series of poems nice and It is amazing and it is emotionally

Incredibly powerful And I very highly recommend it again. It's booked by Kwame Alexander nice so What are you reading? I'm gonna recommend people read Ludo Dewitt's The assassination of Lumumba It is a really good book. He's very very good at delivering all of the information in a chronology that works without it being dry It is an awful period of history But I think it's damn near required reading.

So it's, yeah, that's what I'm going to, Ludo Dewitt's The Assassination of Lumumba. Okay. You want to be found anywhere? Well, before I talk about, and the answer is no, and before we move on, as far as recommendations go, No, and before we move on As far as recommendations go I want I want to bring up King Leopold's ghost by Adam Hawks child yes host child

Which is an incredible source of context yes for everything you've been talking about this evening so having said that, we collectively can be found on the Amazon podcast app, on Spotify and on the Apple podcast app. And we also have of course our website at wabawabawaba.geekhistorytime.com. And wherever you found us, please take the time to subscribe and give us the five-star review that you know we deserve and how about you sir? Let's see by the time this airs you can find me at the Comedy Spot on Friday

August 2nd September 6th and October 4th all of those are Fridays at 9 p.m. Doing capital punishment me and the crew are just slinging and banging with all the good puns So come check it out spin that wheel bring 12 bucks bring friends get your tickets in advance Go to the comedy spots website find their calendar and get your tickets in advance because we have sold out every single show tickets in advance because we have sold out every single show. If you can't get out to it or if you find that the tickets are already sold out, buy the at home package and stay home and stream it and enjoy. I've been told that it translates very well to the small screen. So very cool. Yeah. Well, for a Geek History of Time, I'm Damian Harmony. And I'm Ed Blaylock, and until next time, keep rolling 20s.