A Geek History of Time - Episode 30- New Season, New Producer, Who Dis? (Part 2)

Episode Date: October 5, 2019

Producer George judges the contestants in the D&D Thunderdome- Ed continues to marvel at the brutality of Lyudmila, and Damian does likewise about the Viking on the Bridge. A decision is reached.

Like they they advertise one match when crashing a car into one of the wrestlers. Not a total victory of Russia, which now we're seeing. He jumped off. He's trying to take bag of flaccid dicks. Sorry, contid. Which when you open them up, you find out that they're all cockroaches and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know if anybody else is ever going to laugh this hard at anything we say.

We can actually both look out my window right now and see some very pretty yellow flowers that I'm going to be eradicating. This is a geek history of time. Where we connect nursery to the real world. See, that sounds better. It doesn't, though. Yeah. Yeah, we nailed it this time right up until you said that right and through my game completely off. Who are you? I'm Ed Blaylock motherfucker. Who the hell are you? I'm Damien Harmony no longer a motherfucker. Yeah, there you go twice divorce

Luckily we can edit that out in post because we are a producer this is producer George He's waving. Yeah. So, what do you do for a living? I'm a teacher, which might be hard to believe from the way I just responded to all of that, but you know what, it's Friday night. This is when we record this, and I've had a week. Yeah, well, and you teach what level?

World history at the seventh grade level, which means I've earned the right to swear when I need to. You've also probably learned swears. So I've learned how to put them together in new and novel ways. Not so much for my students, but just from the catharsis in the moment of dealing with my students. That's fair.

How about you? I am a high school teacher. I'm a Latin teacher who dabbles in world history. Currently teaching kids how to write by telling them how awful Disney is for children. Next week we'll actually study history. Okay. So we'll see what happens. I got to crib those lesson plans so that sounds like fun.

Yeah. Lots of outlines. Very cool. So last week we started off with a whole bunch of characters from history that we had to Bring up to our producer George so he could pick a squad from D&D. Yeah, and so I I had statted up five of them and put them together and Damien really got heavily inspired by this idea and just like went off the rails. We got through all of mine.

I spent my, I used up my powder. And now Damien still has several ideas left over here. And so what are we going to start with? Well what you did in quality I decided to do in quantity. So well that's very kind of you. This way I have a fighting chance against the amazing characters that you brought up to George last time.

All right. I have a wizard, a 16th level, standard wizard. Now, the thing about wizards is they get to choose an arcane path, and this one shows, where did I put it, a school of illusion. Okay. You might remember him, he was a cartoonist in the early 1900s Walt Disney. All right. He an interesting choice for murder hobo and but keep talking.

Indeed. Well, he's a level 16. Okay. He is probably the slowest character that I've got in terms of initiative. I might have one who's even lower. Okay. But he is a level 16 and I focused on him being almost entirely a person of illusion. Now he is a human, so he got an extra feat. So he took War Caster just in case he gets in a fight. Okay. But his personality traits I'm well known for my work and I want to make sure everyone appreciates it. I'm always taking it back when people haven't heard of me

Yes, okay this so far this makes sense. Yeah, he doesn't alignment. Did you give him by the way lawful evil? Okay Wait sure Wall Disney yes beloved beloved figureved figure of our pop culture. That's how they get you. Okay. Okay. Okay.

You remember when I'm teaching my kids how to write a book? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Okay. So yeah, law free. Okay. And yeah, it doesn't mean you can't do things that look good. They will definitely benefit him and his master plan

of building his own layer that do things that look good. They will definitely benefit him and his master plan of building his own lair that he will lure children to and turn them into golems. Okay, wait. He's an illusionist, though. Right, well, he's got other people who work for him who also do things and they can bring mutate, give him size into smaller worlds after all. Fuck you. Okay, so what's the time mark on that?

Four minutes. Four minutes. Four minutes. I'm back, baby. Son of a bitch. Yes. But I gotta give you credit. Yes.

That one I didn't see coming. It's funny too, because like, that's that it up the whole thing. You did, yeah, but I, yeah, I've managed to somehow, yeah, good, good work. I think you'll kindly summon it up best, but Jesus suffering. Yeah, yeah, I love that. You got me there. Talk, yeah. All right, so keep going. All right, so a lot of legal. So yeah, I stuck as illusiony as I could.

I gave him a very high charisma. His persuasion is exceptionally high for his level. He's got a plus nine to his persuasion. He actually has an armor class of 12 because to draw all that stuff, he's got a higher dexterity. Okay. And like I said, I pumped up his charisma and his intelligence because he was fairly well educated. Yes.

But his strength is the lowest that I've made any characters I think it's at an 8. Really? Constitution spent a long time really low and then he ended up getting a bump there eventually because of ability scores going up. But the fun part is all of the spells. So I don't want to spoil too much of the magic. So George, submitted for your approval. Tell us what you think.

Of course it's spelled over. Yeah. You know I should have given him a familiar of being a mouse. Yeah, should have. I'm kind of amazed you over with that. I forgot that. Yeah. Bruce and Torin Torin.

Yes. Yeah, that's a good one. Mm-hmm. It's a good controller. Yeah. Well, and also it kind of, you know, the haunted mansion. Oh, yeah. So, you know, you see these holograms coming in and stuff like that.

Okay. Thank you. You see these holograms coming in, stuff like that. Okay. In-con. Secret chest. Mm-hmm. Just a place where you have a lot of stuff that you can keep. His fortune. Silent image. Yeah, the standard thing for an illusionist and for somebody who made cartoons before they were talkies.

Yeah. To let that thing, that's much more. Yeah, I had to kind of go a little far afield because there's not an illusion spell for every level. And so I had to go with things that might complement an illusion spell at every level. Yeah, when I did, when I did Mary Shelley, I had the same issue with Necromancy.

Yeah, so there's just some things where you have to be a generalist. And I think telepathy works really well because you can get into people's heads that way. I mean quite literally into the zeitgeist and influence people in the thinking that Fantasia was good. He had to have a weapon just in case. Yeah. Right. And him with the bow stacks.

It's hard. Well, yeah. I don't know. Are there pictures anywhere of him with a cane at any point? Ah, particularly. That's really good. Yeah. Yeah, no, he, yeah, that would be,

that would be a tough one to figure out there. Yeah. All right. So, I also have a Ranger Fighter. OK. Now he's a Ranger level one a fighter level 12 But another arcane archer and I think I've outdone myself with the other one. Yeah This guy is chaotic evil His name is comitus. Oh well, okay Now it all makes sense. Very much so.

Yeah, I am so terribly vexed by this choice. One of the few people. Well done. But yeah, and it's funny. It's really a scenery chewing performance, by the way. It's amazing. Yeah.

Yeah. And it funny that you would bring that up because he has a walking speed of 30 Good day. Yes sir. Sir, I say good day Okay, so as a background this emperor the one who ruled the Roman Empire. Yeah, just after its high water mark So this is right when he becomes emperor That's what I got this so this is when Marcus Aurelius has just died Yeah, so this is when he's become sole emperor because marcia aurelius actually shared the

Yeah, Aurelius was a remarkably intelligent remarkably Segecious wise man, and that set of decisions stands out as being like, I mean, for a philosopher king, that was a really... I'm gonna push back. I'm gonna push back. Here's why. Now Marcus Relius is the last of the five good emperors. Every good emperor before him did not choose their sons.

They adopted the most qualified person, but the reason for that, none of them had sons. He had a son. He was still a part of the time. Yeah, still a part of the society. And he shared power with the son so he could show him how to do it. He gave every possible chance to this man.

Yeah. And a lot of people say actually that comedists had some really progressive for Rome tax policies. Okay. Had a lot of things that he was doing and then he went off the goddamn deep end because he thought he was Herculean's reborn. Bug house, rat, crazy. Yeah.

But Comedis is a really strong fighter. He's, I mean, he's not your barbarian on the bridge. No one is. Yeah. But, and also his hit points aren't that high high because well, he's only in a level 13 But he's got a strength of 16. He's got a dex of 20 because communist was Legendary now he's one of the only emperors that actually would pretend to be a gladiator Yeah

Yeah, and he would fight people and of course, you know the the how do we put the popular History that we know of gliders is very wrong. Only about a third of them ever died. Yeah. Of those, even fewer died on purpose. Yeah. Because it was a money made, it was entertainment, it was a money making process. Yeah. I mean, pro wrestling was bladed weapons and yeah. So it's pro wrestling in the 90s. Yeah. Okay. So, we're's pro wrestling in the 90s. Yeah, okay. So, or Japanese pro wrestling, which is a real fight. Death match.

Try to make itself look fake. Look at your memories. Yeah, you know, a line like that. Yeah. How do you, I mean, really, have you forget? Yeah. Well, okay. So, you can thank James E. Cornette for that.

Yeah, so, so. So, his dexterity is a 20, because he was actually renowned for being able to fell in animal with a single strike from an arrow. Okay. Running in the arena. That's hard shit to do. Dad, that is.

So he also is a grappler. He took the grappler feet because he was strangled to death by his wrestling coach. Slash lover. Okay. And his sister's insistence. EOL, okay. Well in a bath. Okay, well wrong.

Yeah. His ideals, well his personality trait, get bitter if you're not the center of attention. Yeah. Oh, the tipsy. His bonds, the idolized the hero. I know like that. I'm sorry, say that again.

He idolizes the hero and tries to emulate him. Okay. And he would do anything to him, fame and fortune. It does sound like Epic to President. Yeah. He was emperor. I know. What does he have to do beyond that to gain fame and...

He didn't put his family fortune into a blind trust when he was emperor either. He used it to continually enrich himself, which in Rome was normal. Yeah. He also likes killing animals. His favorite enemy was beasts. Yeah, he stood logically. And then I gave him Sharp Shooter. Okay.

Because again, he be a gladius. And he's the only character I have that wears any armor besides leather. He wears scale mail. Oh, yeah. Which again makes sense. Yeah. So that's for an armor class of 16.

16. Well, armored. OK. All right. All right. So here is Cometus. Feel free to shout out to anything that you see is Yep, he's an emperor so he's always got the Praetorian guard around him. Yeah

Cuz he thought he was Yeah, yeah, literally what it says. All the goldiness. Yeah, well, he's the emperor. Right. So, you know, the entire treasury of Rome. Yeah, pretty much. He has the Roman treasury.

So just as a side note based on the fact that, you know, he started out with all this promise and then, you know, became crazier in his shit house, rat. Do you have, has anybody forensically, like, tried to go through and give him a diagnosis? Like, do we hit, like, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, some people say lead poisoning, that's, everybody's fault out there.

Oh, I, I, I, but that's not, really have a chemistry works. And I would have meant that everybody in Rome had it. But I mean, I'm wondering if like, I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know.

I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know.

I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know.

I know. I know. I know. And then he was killed. See, and the reason I bring this age up is because, of course, the age at which schizophrenia tends to manifest, and I'm just wondering, you know, because that kind of delusion of no, I'm Hercules, you know, I mean, I'm just, because I mean, it could very well just be that, no, no, I'm the emperor Ipsofacto, which. It just makes sense. And there wasn't like a like a psychiatric diagnosis involved. You know what you're right? I got his death off by about nine years. He died at 31. So it was possible that it did obviate itself at that. Okay. It couldn't have been helped by the fact that he had all the power in the world that he knew. Yeah. And no one could tell him. And nobody And nobody could, nobody could reign him in the hotel.

And he was winning fake fights. So eventually you start to believe your own hype. Well, yeah. There's plenty of professors that sort of think that. Oh, what's the term in mentalist circles? They talk about somebody who has a blind eye. Don't worry about that. It's also the title of a series on stars about a about a mentalist who wants to take a blow to the head and may or may not have

actually developed psychic powers. And yeah, I'll have to look it up. But yeah, but no, you start falling for your own. Yeah, your own your own publicity. Yeah. So anything else? One of the contrasts between the previous archer is the indomitable. Yes. In reroll, failed once, after a long rest. Yeah. So essentially, if he blows a fail safe, or if he fails a saving throw, essentially. So he was good at fighting hand-to-hand as well. He was very well trained. So unlike the Admelah who was really good at hitting you from very far

and hiding, she's never going to get into the combat. Despite the fact she has a lot of hit points, he's going to try to get up there into the fight too. He is not going to make it in the group, even if he makes it into the group because his own bullshit is going to get into his head and he will go out and get himself killed. Bigger than a fight. So, all right. I've got two more left. There are two women. The first one is I went cleric as well. Okay. I figure cleric might be my best way to get a character on the team. Okay. Um, and she is a Clarek of the grave, level 13. Okay. Uh, her, uh, she's a full carol and her defining moment of defiance was that she stood up to a tyrant's agents by

participating in protests against the T-Act in the United States. Okay. Her name is Mary Ludwig Hayes, also known as Molly Pitcher. Okay. Now, it's possible that Molly Pitcher is in a malgamation with different people, and it's entirely likely that plenty of women ran around in battles, giving pictures of water to men. Yes.

Historically, she was said to have been noticed by George Washington, but again, some of this is apocryphal. Although there is an account that said that she got shot once between the legs, went through her dress, through and through, didn't hit her. And she looked down and says, well, it's a good thing I'm taller.

And kept on going. And kept up, because what else are you gonna do in a situation? You know, I mean, like if you fall apart there, you're gonna get killed. Yes. You know, the choice is just, no, no. Oh, hey. All right, moving on.

Interestingly, she's the second woman whose husband ends up wounded in a battle and were dying. That I think? Well, yeah. And. Historically, it's a theme. Yeah, it really is. It's kind of hell. Yeah. And... Historically, it's a theme. Yeah, it really is. Especially.

Yeah. Because there's another Russian that I'm going to have to try to figure out how to use another time as a fighter. Tell me it's one of the night witches. No. She was a tanker. Oh, okay. And then I forget a shambon.

And then I forget a shambon. Yeah, iron girlfriend. Yes. Oh, she's fun. Yeah. So, Mary has an intelligence of eight and a strength of eight. She didn't go to school. Okay. Girls back then in America, I didn't. Okay. I find the strength of the low strength interesting. Simply because in point of practical fact,

somebody who was not from an upperrust kind of background would have been spending a lot of time doing some level of physical labor just in day to day life. She was, I don't recall what she was supposed to have done as a worker. Seemsterist or? No, it was something a little bit more manual. Seemsterist is obviously very manual, but like a little more like hard work manual. But it was nothing that really built up. Washer woman's strength? No. She did join the camp.

The camp? Well yeah. But it might come to me later. Whatever it was. So I did give her a constitution of 15 though. She was tough. That makes a lot of sense. Yeah. Her wisdom was 14. Okay. Her Christmas 16. Her stats are fairly unremarkable to be perfect on us.

Okay. It's pretty high charisma stat. It is, it is. But everybody. That's that because the full-curro legendary and she's a cleric. And so I put her highest stats into wisdom and charisma for the most part. Okay. but also she did inspire folk. Okay. So

Grave domain like I said, I gave her this the Now running back and forth giving people water. You need to be fast. So I gave her mobility. Okay, and she can channel divinity Which is path to the grave she can select an enemy within 30 feet and mark them for death And they're cursed until the end of her next turn. That's a deepoth. So what what what mechanical effect does being marked for death have in this sense? It makes it so that you are vulnerable to the next attack. So disadvantage or.

Yeah, and actually I think it's either max damage when you get hit or because it's not crit But it's like it's something along those lines. Wow. Yeah, or or no, you have you have vulnerability Yeah, which so it's bonus ten points or something like that. Yeah Holy okay, she also has circled mortality when she would normally roll for one or more dice to restore the hit points with a spell to a creature who has zero hit points. She would use the highest number possible. So if she has a dice pool, she just always gets through all that the height of that pool because she's going around taking care of people and tend to She also has eyes of the grave. She can detect the undead within 60 feet. Okay. Just kind of a...

Kind of an important thing in a fantastical world where you're going to run into that stuff. She also has sentinel at death's door, which as a reaction can turn a crit within 30 feet of her into a normal hit. Okay. Wisdom modifier times per day. Alright. With a long run. No.

Potent spellcasting, she gets to add her wisdom modifier to a damage of any clerical can trip. OK. She's not a fight in cleric, though. So depending on Jordan's priorities, he might not like characters who are not fighters. She can also destroy the undead, failed save, versus turned, kills them if they're CR2 or lower

Which doesn't suck vulnerable Yeah, looking up vulnerability because I needed to remember just exactly how it worked If a creature or an object has vulnerability to a damaged type damage of that type is doubled against it So wow, so that's double damage to like the next attack. Anyone, he marks out. Anybody, she might, ha. So combined that with Leoed Miller and, and oh, oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,

did you bring a dragon? No, no, no, no. You brought a headless dragon. You brought a headless dragon. Sorry, no, no, what you brought was a dragon with a gigantic hole through a green pan. You brought a headless dragon. You brought a dragon. Sorry, no, no, what you brought was a dragon with a gigantic hole through a green pan. You brought a dragon pin.

Yeah. Wow. Or she was going to be uphealing her barbarian friend. Yeah. Y'all boned. You don't know it yet, but y'all are in trouble. So, so. Yep.

Dear Lord, she also, what level did that accrue to her at? The Sentinel Deaths door, let's see, one, two, three, that had to be toward the end of her clarifying. Probably twice. Nuts, okay.

Oh no, no, that's the eyes, no, that's circle mortality, that's actually six level. Oh, yeah. Okay, that's the eyes. No, that's circle mortally. That's actually six level. Oh, yeah. Okay. Wow. Yep. All right. She also then took the the feats of healer. Makes sense. Tough. Which makes sense. Yeah. Which increased her hit points after a little while. And yeah, that's that's pretty much what she did. All right. I left the spells for George Shred. Her spell save DC is not that high. Her spell save DC is not that high, her spell attack modifier is not that far, because she's not a hitter. But here is Mary

Ludwig Hayes, also known as Molly Pitcher, for your approval. Yeah, neutral good. Yep. Does the most good that she can. Yeah, it makes sense. But she did fight the law Yeah, go So what What would the melee damage of a mid not medieval of a revolutionary era Pewter Because you'd wanted to be pewter cuz Crockery would break first time you hit somebody with it, right?

But if you if you you know said no, no, that's her holy symbol slash main weapon. Oh, I would give it that Most of the six at most I would say it's probably a default for a six bludgeoning. Yeah Yeah, and then she put holy water into it Really mess with the undead yeah Yeah Yeah. Yeah. I see you had it from your touch. Yeah. You know, you might need to perform triage. And you know you can save this guy and this guy's already on his way out. He's failed his death save for the third time.

You know what, I'm just gonna take him, give it there. And also keep yourself up going. Yeah. But then you have race day. Yes. So you can suck his line for that. Bring him back. So, and she has a lot of water-based spells.

Yeah, well, yeah, that makes a lot of sense. All right, last one. Last one, can't it do? Certainly not least, probably one of the first ones that I stared out. She is a level 20 character. She is a level one bard, a level nine rogue scout, and a level 10 Ranger Hunter. Okay. She went Ranger first, then rogue, then bard. Okay.

She's her background is criminal. She is both a smuggler and a spy. Okay. She's only five feet tall. Her name is Harriet Tubman. All, sorry forgive me Harriet mother fucking tub Okay, yes, yeah, she is a badass. She has a total of 143 hit points Okay, respectable. Yeah, and when you realize her constitution is only a 14 Yeah, well the 20th level you just you just, yeah, you pile them up. So, yeah, however, however, her having a lot of hit points, makes some sense. Yes.

Yeah. Now her dex is actually a minus one, uh, only to the fact that she'd gotten a head wound and had been really bad eyesight. Yeah. So she sucked with a gun, but that doesn't mean she didn't pull it out. No. Um, she had a really Yeah, so she sucked with a gun, but that doesn't mean she didn't pull it out. No. She had a really high wisdom because she noticed everything

and knew how to get everywhere. She had a decent intelligence and a fairly high charisma because she convinced people, no, no, we're escaping. You're not turning back. Right. We're not giving up.

We're gonna get out of here, come hell or I water. Exactly. So she has a criminal contact, network of contacts, underground railroad. Yeah. I love the fact that her criminal contact network is made up of quakers and Northern dogoaters.

That's her criminal network is a bunch of bleeding heart liberals. You know, you're on the the 18 of the 1800s. Oh man. Like you know you're on the wrong side of history when Quakers are the criminals. Are the are the are are you trying to find a way to paint Quakers as the bad guy. Yeah. Like wait. I'm sorry. Hold up for half a second. Yeah. All right. So I gave her cunning action. Obviously skirmisher. So she's a scout, right? Yeah. So skirmisher. She can move half her speed if the enemy lands within five feet of her. Okay. She can get the hell out of there. Yeah. No attack of opportunity when she's okay. Survival is she got. She added nature and survival to her proficiency. You're standard thief kit. Favorite enemy, slave hunters.

This makes perfect sense. She gets advantage to tracking them and recalling information about them. So she can track them, she can stay away from them. Yeah. She's a natural explorer. Out of she needs to, she can shove them hard. Mm-hmm.

See, I listed her spells here, I'll let George read them. She took alert as well. Yeah, wait. It's just a great fucking it really is me and it means she can't be surprised while she's conscious at all So when you're trying to hide from people, but it brought her initiative up to her initiative up to a plus four Okay, it has a plus five. Yeah Well, because you're well, and that's a good way to compensate for the dexteriation. Now, she also took Hordebreaker

as you discussed last episode with Teddy Roosevelt. I mean, because, you know, anytime you're talking about a historical figure, that's probably going to be the best one for him to have. Yeah. She also has Steel Will, which gives her advantage on save versus frighten spells or being frightened.

Being scared by any kind of effect. She also took lands stride, which gives her, yes. In no cost to difficult terrain, no damage against non-magic plants, and advantage to all saves against magic plants. She can also hide and play in sight. She took Lucky. And she also, that one level of Bard gave her a bardic inspiration. Yeah. Getting everybody out. Yeah.

Yeah. And then yeah, and she also took the two cantrips of Mending and Message. Important for what she's doing. Yeah. And then Dis self, uh, dissonant whispers charm person and heroism. Okay. So great utility character. Mm-hmm. Really great support character. Mm-hmm. Not one that's going to be particularly crunchy when it comes time to crack skulls. She is not your

combat character. She is your non-combat character. Yeah. And I think she's gonna make it into the group. Okay. She might be choice five or six depending on firework. Yeah. But she is gonna be the one to get you through the wilderness because George, if you wouldn't mind, feel free to take a look at all these spells down here, but also look at her abilities and what they're at. She has a plus eight in the ammo hand being. And what they're at. Okay, plus 11 and deception. Okay, good one. Okay, plus 17 and intimidation. Or no, that's just seven. Sorry. Yeah.

Okay, yeah. Yeah, it's like whoa. Wow. Holy moly. But she's pulled guns on people and backed down. Well, well, yeah, we were out of 100. Well, yeah, no, no, definitely. Plus 12 in survival. Okay. So she's the really, really good skills challenge character.

Yes. Okay. You need that in the game. Which, yeah, you do. You do. In fifth, I think there'd be, it would be, it would be more of a priority in fourth because the way they structured skill challenges, but it's still an important aspect to have on the team. Yes.

Utility woman. Yes. Definitely. Snare. Oh, it's spelled. Yeah, it's spelled. Yeah. Can't follow me.

You're hanging from a tree. Does that make sense? By your ankles. Oh, it's Belle. That's jealous. Good spell. Can't follow me. You're hanging from a tree. What does that make sense? By your ankles. Yeah.

We're breaking your already pension. We're? Manacles, that's an interesting, is it more of a deception thing? Yeah. Yeah, so she can look, she can give the appearance of, and also if she catches that and be trailing after her, she can give the appearance of and also if she catches anybody trailing after her

She can turn tables on them lock them up. Yeah What's the ending? Oh There was some discussion about she believed somewhat in folk magic And so the amulet is just you know kind of a talisman type thing kind of spiritualism in the 1800s, especially the African American variety, was an amalgamation of several generations of people having been brought from Africa to here mixing with Christianity.

Nowhere near as obvious as like in the lower tradition, but you would still have this idea of things like that. There'd be animistic aspects to it. Getting very anthropology student pointy-headed, talking about it. And I do find her flaw in just the fanning spells. She suffered a blow while she was a slave. I think stayed her overseer's hand at attacking other her husband or a son.

And he pistol whipped her, I want to say. I might be wrong, feel free to correct me. And thereafter she had fainting spells. And sometimes it would happen while she was on the road to taking people to freedom. And sometimes it would last for minutes and sometimes hours. So it was a problem. A historical example of somebody with a TBI. Yeah. That's, wow. So that's the last one I've got for the game. So submitted for your approval, you now have the unenviable task while we go to commercial of selecting the squad. Okay, all right, and we'll see you on the other side.

Hey geek nation, this is Ed. And Damian, hey, what you got there? I got a copy of the stolen by my good friend, Bishop O'Connell. He is a Norwegian wedding cake creator? No, he is not. He is an urban fantasy writer, member of the science fiction writers of America. Oh wow. So that looks like it says one of three. Yes, well, it's the first volume of an American fairy tale.

The other two volumes are the forgotten and the returned. Nice. What's, it's fairy tales. I mean, there's a lot of Celtic and Irish folklore in there. A very great deal, yes. The first novel actually involves the characters traveling to Tyrannanog. No kidding.

Yeah. Wow, I remember that from Titanic. Yeah, you. Good day, sir. With that back to the show. And we're back from our commercial break. Indeed we are. Great product. George has worked at lightning speed while we were singing the praises of our beloved

sponsor. Yes. Thank you again, beloved sponsor. Thank you again, beloved sponsor. And those of you who are looking to do it again and do it more, we definitely are happy to show for you. Very. So George, what have you gone with?

Who makes the cut? Well, I'm going to, the hardest decision was the cleric. Oh, OK. So you're going to have one. Well, yeah, I got to have a cleric. OK. That's probably the way I'm starting with it, because that's to me and base of your.

OK. To keep everyone else alive. OK. And so I ended up going with Ignatius. to me and base up here. Okay. To keep everyone else alive. Okay. And so I ended up going with Ignatius. Just here at the end of the slide level. Okay. So there's an access to a few more spells than Mary. That makes sense.

And he has a pretty decent armor class, but it was mainly that he had more spells than... Okay. So the spells not so much as the ability to hit shit really hard It had more to do his ability to heal more things right and larger groups of people, okay All right, that's one Fred all right, and then so then He did someone to take the attack Hmm well, we know who that is I needed someone to take the attack, take the beach shield.

Well, we know who that is. The Viking on the beach. Yeah, no, the Viking on the beach. The Viking on the beach. The Viking on the beach flings him as the, you know, here's my pile-um, is, you know, the real empire. Okay. So that he doesn't have to take all the damage.

We want to drop people as quickly as possible. Yep. So, like I never say anything, right? Le-me-me-me. So we have a distance fighter and an up close fighter. Yeah So he's going up the damage and she's picking on people that's Aggro doctor, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah And anybody he doesn't quite kill she puts the final Yeah puts puts the final nail in the in the coffin All right, we have some soup.

Oh, no. All right. And yeah, you need a rogue in the party. Yeah. Yeah. So by my count, Ed is up three to one. OK. Yeah.

If you happen to know the next one is Harriet Tubman. Yeah. All right. Skill. I'm going to use my skills in the year as well as driving the train Mm-hmm, and that's where you know, Teddy and and Wong failing yeah, long found mm-hmm both kind of have that but she also had this survival skills So okay, okay, all right. I like it. It works

Four to two well done, sir. All right. Well, you know who doesn't want? You know Nick Romancey right to raise you know the enemy just killed to go fight Is his buddies. Yeah, it's good point. Yeah So but the whole time she does it she's mostly motivated by the fact that she just wants everybody to come back damn it Make me sad see well you yeah cuz I mean you know you hear about her life and yeah, dude So I gotta say there a couple that surprised me didn't make it obviously can't all make the cut but How close to making it did Teddy Roosevelt and Wong-Fey Hong Kong?

Cause I figure you went with her magic over both Disney's and Houdini's. You gotta pick a, you gotta pick a Wizard of some sort. And Necromancy, like you said, you're recycling. It's good for the planet. Good for the planet and okay for you. Reduce for you is recycle. Yeah.

You didn't choose a skirmisher, a true skirmisher. Well, I guess you do have one with Sun Siu, but you didn't choose Wang Fehung and you didn't choose Teddy Roosevelt. And I'm curious, what disqualified them. Well, again, like I said, it was kind of a... The one thing that I like about the monk is his ability to move and then climb walk or get what it was called. Wind walk? Wind stride?

Yeah. And so that allows him to move, but here he also has the survival. True. So it's kind of doing the same thing and having more on top of that. Right. Okay. And then I'm going, I'm going to surmise that Teddy didn't make it because kind of of the same thing. Everything he does, Lueb Miller does like a whole lot better. Right. And actually he was the one that I... I didn't count him out first, but he was one of the first like, okay. Does he have those stuff there? Okay. No.

I know. I know. That was a fatal flaw on my part. Fatal mistake. No, I don't know. He has armor though, right? He's wearing armor. His leather armor.

Well, not. He doesn't have a lot of. He doesn't have four. Yeah, shot. So so yeah, no, because because yeah, the the the speed the folded up speeches after he was was during his second second run for a third term right as it for the bull noose party right and Yeah, so so that would count as studded leather rather than just leather. Good point. And no, he's not there yet. So it's just his buff coat and jaude purrs with the roughwriters. Fun fact, he also, while he's with the roughwriters, his wife had already died.

His first wife had already died. Right. Oh, this is before the second wife died. All the light has gone out of my life. Because it's wife's mother's mother. Well, his wife and his mother. Yeah. And so he, you know, instead of joining the foreign Legion,

he became a cattle rancher and Wyoming. Right. I just, I know that he wore oddly enough. And I don't remember for how long, but they made fun of him for this, for being a dandy for a little bit, because he wore Ladies undergarments made of silk yeah, which was really the first time that we see a Teddy

God damn it We will hear from my second present, please, sir. God damn it. Well, because it was made of both sweet smelling, silk and fabric. It was rose felt. It was a Teddy Rose felt. What can I throw? Okay. No, in terms of actual historical fact, it's worth noting that his army uniform when he went to Spain was made by Brooks Brothers.

If you want to talk about somebody being a dandy. And he was actually made fun of being a back east dandy when he got out west because he was dressed the way somebody who was a Harvard graduate would think a cowboy would dress and that went over very poorly at first. Mm-hmm. Okay. So, I have a challenge for us for the next time. Okay.

We have taken a whole bunch of historical figures and started them out. Yeah. I want to break that team. Okay. I want us to find a team. That's gonna be tough. Yes. I want us to find a team that George can choose from. Okay. For the beginning of season three, which is not gonna be for a while, but beginning to think about stuff. Fictional, but not mythological characters. Okay, so from movies and by the way mythological cannot it can also encompass

comic books. That's our modern myth. Okay, arc types. Right. So you Arc type is out of so you can't use Marvel or DC characters. You can't use comic book characters because I think that could be its own genre. Yes, I am going to ask because this just occurred to me like because it's not really marvelous. I don't remember which company published it, but Grendel, the Grendel. The Grendel, Grendel Prime, Grendel. Oh, oh, no, I'm not sure something you're not entirely familiar with. Well, I'm late because I'm going to wait to meet. Yeah.

There's a book that I read when I was in high school called Grendel, but that was about Grendel who fought against Bayer Wolf, and I would consider that to be a myth a lot. That would be, but this is not that. This is not that. This is a very, very different character. Do it. Okay.

Yeah. That's fine. It's an Indie comics. I was thinking because I see no reason why the Wolfman or why, you know, Frankenstein wouldn't work. Okay. Yeah. So, yeah, we'll definitely do that to try to break this team.

Sounds good. So that's fiction breaking history. All right. Cool. Let's see. So, what do we have coming up in the future? So, this is kind of the inaugural first two episodes of the second season.

Okay, well, I know I'm raring to go with an analysis of how exactly it is that the Jedi Order in Star Wars was effectively betrayed by George Lucas's box top understanding of Buddhism. I really liked that the first Star Wars episode for us not only didn't come from me but took an entire season to get here. Wait, what? Fuck.

Yeah. How? Okay. Well, there you go. We're finally hitting it. Cracking that can open. Yeah. Good.

Well, I will be talking about Screwball comedy from the 1940s and how that genre died. OK. And I'll also dip back into, yes, who's the short answer. And I'll also be dipping back into Marvel Comics in comparing them to the Patriot Act. All right. So that's some stuff that we got coming up.

Also, I believe we'll be talking about zombies at some point this season. Yeah. Yeah. We got to dig into that one. I know we've been talking about that for a while. Yeah. And at some point, I have to bite the bullet and commit to the analysis of how Batman's villains have changed over time. Ooh, that should be fun. Yeah. Because I'll have a lot to say about that. I'm sure you will. We both will. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, other than that, we'll probably take a look at

Alcohol by Region. I don't think I'll finish my longevity study of friends and the rise of Stone Cold Steve Austin until season three. Sweet. Wow. Yeah. You're a monster for going through that research. You're a dear God. All right. It's a labor of love. Mike, is it really? Yeah. Okay. As it were. Love of punishment.

And I'm hoping that we can get a couple more interviews in with us this season. It is. And now that we have a producer, we'll be able to spend a lot more time on the creative side of things. Yes. And we'll be able to put out some good stuff. So, there's hope. Well, George, what are you going to say? Well, also just with the podcast itself, hopefully we'll be adding an Instagram account so that you can see many of the things that Ed has been describing Okay

This is true and add some other Other enhancements to the podcast Okay, not necessarily audio read but like out in out in the media the media landscape, right? Okay, so that's just something to look forward to and just letting you know ahead of time. All right. Cool. Well, if you have a geek thing that you want us to explore in the context around its creation or some sort of connection to history, you can contact us currently at Geek

History Time on the Twitter or Ed? E.H. Blaylock on the Twitters. Or the Harmony on the Twitters. Exactly, two H's. Well, George, thank you for joining us. Thank you, glad to have you aboard. Very glad to have you aboard. Yes, so I'm Ed Blaylock. I'm Damien Harmony.

I'm George Harmony. And until next time, keep rolling 20s.