A Hot Dog Is a Sandwich - What’s The Sexiest Food? ft. Ned Fulmer
Episode Date: February 9, 2022Today, we're joined by Ned Fulmer of The Try Guys to discuss: what's the sexiest food? Check out Ned's new cookbook, The Date Night Cookbook: www.datenightcookbook.com Ned's Instagram: www.instagram.c...om/nedfulmer The Try Guys: www.youtube.com/tryguys To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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This, this, this, this is Mythical.
They say pizza is like sex. Even when it's bad, it's, yeah, it's still pretty bad.
Today we're discussing, what's the sexiest food? This is a hot dog is a sandwich.
Ketchup is a smoothie.
Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what?
That makes no sense.
A hot dog is a sandwich.
A hot dog is a sandwich.
What?
Welcome to our podcast, A Hot Dog is a Sandwich, the show where we break down the world's biggest food debates.
I'm your host, Josh Scher.
And I'm your host, Nicole Inayati.
And today we're excited to be joined by Ned Fulmer.
Ned's a beloved member of the Try Guys, two-time best-selling author, host of two podcast series, and the father of two children.
Ned, congrats on the sex.
He and his wife, Ariel, recently...
I'm sorry, I couldn't...
It was good.
He and his wife, Ariel, recently released the Date Night Cookbook, making him the perfect person to talk about the love language of food.
Ned, welcome to the show.
Thanks for having me. What's up, guys?
Hey, I'm glad you're here.
Can confirm I have had sex.
Mazel tov.
Two children, it counts.
Was it disappointing?
Because you read about it, and then it happens, and you're like, well, you know.
I'm sorry that happened for you.
Ah, no, it's okay. You know, we all have our, anyways, we are
talking about the sexiest food. Also, disclosure,
I wanted to call this, what's the perfect
first date food? And then Nicole just goes, no,
I want to talk about what's sexy to us.
Yeah, I'm all about sexy stuff.
Good call, Nicole. Thank you, thank you.
I think first date food can't be too sexy, can't be too evocative, you know what I mean?
You can't just bring out a plate of oysters and truffle pasta and a steak medium rare.
That's too much.
You've got to slow burn it.
You've got to slow play it.
Yeah, you've got to do a sexy carrot.
If we find the perfect first date food, we will eventually figure out the sexiest food.
You're right. Because things will be going in the right direction. Natural progression. You have we will eventually figure out the sexiest food. You're right.
Because things will be going in the right direction.
Natural progression.
You have to escalate it to the sexiest.
I mean, this is a great segue to plug the hell out of Ned's cookbook.
Because it is really cool the way that you structured it.
You literally structured it based on the stages of a relationship, right?
Yeah.
It's literally from first date, then, you know, meeting each other's friends and cooking these big lavish meals and settling into comfortability and stuff like that.
So, I mean, to you, you've been in a relationship for a long time.
What does the sexiest food look like now?
I think it's got to be chocolate.
Anything chocolate.
Probably the sexiest recipe in the cookbook is, you know,
it starts with attraction and then dating,
and then we have a disappointment chapter,
which is maybe a breakup or maybe it's just a fight.
Sure.
But then the best part of the disappointment chapter is the kiss and make up meal.
Excellent.
But that's most extravagant.
So we have a raspberry flourless chocolate cake.
That's kind of like, you know, an I'm sorry cake.
That's objectively sexy.
Yeah.
Saying I'm sorry is sexy.
Apologizing whenever you make a big mistake.
Yeah, making a mistake and saying sorry is very
sexy i think more people should apologize i think i think the sexiest thing is being yourself
but like what about in food like like what about no no okay okay so so you and i have talked a lot
and i'm curious to hear ned's take on this about like how key food was to our attraction romantic
partner right like how sure it's like a linchpin that binds it. And I remember I made a very conscious choice that when I started going on dates with people that
I would just like show my full self through food because food is the most important thing in my
life. It's how I, it's the lens through which I view the world. And so I was like, I'm not going
to try and be prim and proper. I'm going to go in and just be the old dirty bastard version of
myself, just eating with my hands, being an absolute slob because that's me and if anybody rejects that why would i ever want that uh and so i remember going on my
first date with julia we've now been together for two years been living together from one of them
and on our first date we just you know basically fired the menu at nightshade my favorite restaurant
in los angeles um and i could tell that she was trying to like be prim and proper not embarrass
herself and then at some point we're a couple cocktails in and she's having this you know deep conversation she's like wildly gesticulating with
her hands and then she just grabs like a roasted carrot and swipes it through tamarind caramel and
she goes like and they're sucking off her fingers and to me that was like that was the sexiest thing
it was just like you know how to hang and so i love that were there any like indicators with
both of your partners that like oh oh, they're down AF?
Wow.
With my husband right now
or like in the past.
Or a past lover
you want to reconnect with.
Well,
one really interesting story
is I was on a date
with a guy
and there was lamb chops
and he had a knife and fork
but I just kind of went in
and I picked up the lamb chop
and I ripped through
and he immediately said,
I love you.
I was like, oh no. I was like, oh no,
please. No, no. But with David, one of our first dates was actually, I made a card and I invited
him to my house for a Valentine's Day dinner. And I kicked my parents out of the house. I'm like,
I need a kitchen February 14th from five o'clock to question mark. And then I made like a full like, I made like, what did I make?
I made like a hamachi crudo.
I made a steak.
I made like roasted broccoli and Brussels sprouts.
Like I did a whole like coarsed out meal.
You did the damn thing.
Hamachi crudo?
I wanted to impress him.
That's $17.
I wanted to impress him like really badly.
I'm like, yeah, you're dating a food person.
Look at this.
And then he was just very appreciative because honestly, my steak came out really chewy and him like really badly. I'm like, yeah, you're dating a food person. Look at this. So I, and
then he was just very appreciative because honestly, my steak came out really chewy and I
was so embarrassed. I'm like, oh no, my steak is chewy. I'm so upset. But he's like, don't worry.
Like your effort was incredible. I loved it. What a fun thing. I can't wait to do this with you
again. So that was really special. That's a very nice thing to say. Your effort was incredible.
And I had a great time. I can't wait to do this again.
He gave me a gold star and he's like, good job.
Thank you so much. And that was
probably one of the first food
memories I've made with David. That's very special
to me to this day. Ned, when did you know
Ariel was the one? Oh, I mean
I knew she was a
special person right away. I mean
the first night that we met
we just kept trying to get closer and closer to each other.
It was like an eight-person, nine-person party
where everyone talks in one giant circle,
and it's like sometimes it's a group conversation
and it really shouldn't be.
We were the people dominating the group conversation.
Slowly worked my way to be sitting right next to her.
But I knew right away in terms of food, we connect over chardonnay and pasta, Italian
food.
One of our very first dates, I took her to like the fancy Italian place near us and we
got a table with candles.
We were like 21, 22.
Were you kind of faking it a little bit?
Oh, we were totally putting on the Ritz.
Like, oh, this is my best shirt.
Oh, that's so sweet.
And I ordered this.
They had this, like, one-pound meatball, which I was like, oh, wow, this is going to be awesome.
We're going to split this giant thing.
It's going to be hilarious.
And then it turns out she didn't eat beef or pork.
Wow.
So then I just have this giant thing in front of me.
And then there's this sense of like, I don't know, I wanted to like show her like how tough I was by like putting down this giant piece of meat.
All on your own.
Yeah.
Oh, no.
I tried my hardest. I got about a half quarter of the way, three quarters of the way through it.
I mean, come on now.
That's a big meatball.
That's an untenably large meatball.
But we learned, you know, we learn new things about each other.
Yeah, that's fair.
I think it's funny, especially on the first couple dates, like when you're thinking things may at least get reasonably physically intimate, right?
Okay.
And then you're faced with the thing of like, should I order the one pound meatball
and try and eat it?
No, wouldn't do that.
No.
Do not do food challenges
on a first date
or a third date
or anything.
That's good advice.
I do remember hearing
Roy Choi talk about
the difference between
like American dating culture
and Korean dating culture
in that regard
where he was at
Danseongsa
which is a great
like Korean
just drinking hub
that has super drunk food.
You know, they have, like, the army stew with the spam and the kimchi and the ramen noodles and all that.
One of my favorite places in the world.
I think Julie and I went on our, like, fifth date there.
Nice.
So we had, you know, enough sort of runway to be able to be that comfortable.
But he was saying how in Korean dating culture, you will just drink a bunch of soju, drink a bunch of beer,
eat the most squid and garlic and kimchi possible,
and then be way too full to have sex,
and then just go home and just do it anyways.
He's like, that has been my experience with Korean dating culture,
and there's a part of me that's just like, that, now that's romance.
That's sexy.
Yeah, pushing through your physical limitations to be intimate with each other.
Yeah, yeah.
I can see that, yeah.
I think there's an intimacy in being gross together.
Yeah, I get that, but I can't think of a belly I think there's an intimacy in being gross together. Yeah, I get that.
But I can't think of a belly...
There's nothing worse than sex and a belly full of squid.
I'm sorry.
I can't.
The two just don't match for me personally.
I have a question for you guys.
What do you guys think is the least sexiest food?
Like, whenever you're on a date, like, what's something that's just like, I'm not going
to order this whenever I'm with my partner?
Do you have one?
Porridge.
Wait, no. Julie and I ate a lot of porridge on our first date.
Yeah, no, it was congee, yes.
We just ate a big bowl of porridge with pork floss in it.
That's nice.
And that was really great.
I don't know that I consider any food unsexy in a vacuum.
No, I think for me it's kind of what we were talking about of being like uncomfortably full.
I don't know that I can do the Korean dating culture thing
that you were talking about.
But for me, the one food that I can't under-eat
is Indian food.
I always want to get one more thing or two more things.
Then you have six different dishes,
and you're like, oh, I really should have had two.
Then you just have
a little taste of everything
and anytime
I'm just always
uncomfortably full
does not lead to intimacy
yeah
which as you progress
in a relationship
that's like
those are the best nights
where you both just have
the like
hey yo
this ain't gonna happen
like we just
Julie and I recreated
a meal from Peter Luger's
oh nice
famous steakhouse in Brooklyn that she grew up going to all the time.
And like, you know, we did the bacon.
We did the wedge salad.
We just did the whole damn thing.
It was a giant shrimp cocktail.
I paid way too much for steak from a cut above butcher shop, which does great work.
They do.
And then afterwards it was like, all right, we're going to bed.
High five.
Roll over.
Yeah.
One of those nights where you don't even brush your teeth.
You're like, oh, that's a morning meat problem.
I'll see you.
See you, chair.
I mean, you're probably fighting a stomachache even just to fall asleep.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You got to lay on your stomach and take a gas ex.
But I think one of the foods for me, in Farsi, there's this term called dam kardam.
And it's whenever you eat too much food and it's like you're roasting yourself.
So I think one of the foods that does that for me is ramen.
Like a bowl of some good ass ramen.
Because you cannot finish it.
Yeah.
X.
Immediate X.
Like I'm just like I can't even think about anything sexy right now after eating a bowl of ramen.
I feel accomplished when I finish a bowl of ramen.
But I don't feel sexy after finishing a bowl of ramen. I love that you say you feel accomplished. Crushing a bowl of ramen. I feel accomplished when I finish a bowl of ramen, but I don't feel sexy after finishing a bowl of ramen.
I love that you say you feel accomplished.
Crushing a bowl of ramen is an accomplishment.
Always, always, always.
And they oftentimes have a little note to you
in the bottom of the bowl. The bowl says
something. It should say like
Good job!
You did it!
Have fun getting no action tonight.
You know what's really sexy?
Sushi is a very sexy meal.
Yes.
I love sushi dates.
That's one of my favorite things to do is just go.
At what date, though, is it appropriate to get sushi, do you say?
What number date?
One.
First date.
I agree.
Just go.
One, just go.
Sushi.
Yeah.
You can even go to a nice place.
Yeah, nice sushi for a first date. uh okay so i i was thinking about my own
sushi dates and um there's there's one memory that comes up it was uh i was really trying to show
that i was a capital b baller and so we went to like a nice omakase spot because this girl said
that she was very into sushi that can mean a lot of things right right? If you're somebody who is like us, all into food, very into sushi,
means you like omakase and you are there to experience it all.
And then we're like on our way there in an Uber.
We pre-gamed it a little bit respectfully.
And then she tells me a story about how she got kicked out of a sushi bar
that was omakase for like asking them to make a spicy tuna roll
and they wouldn't.
And then she got belligerent.
Oh.
And I was like, I was just like.
Those are so many red flags.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh no.
A couple red flags and should have seen a couple of those.
And then so this whole time at this meal,
I'm just like looking at her just like,
do not ruin this for me.
And we ended up having a pretty good time.
That's good.
Spending way too much money.
Yeah.
But yeah, Q Sushi downtown.
What a time.
Omakase is a very sexy concept too.
Like I'm leaving it.
Like I'm here.
I'm just going to leave it up to the chef.
I want to get to know you.
Like I want to know exactly what makes you tick.
But hey, just bring the sushi as it comes.
I'm not even going to look at the menu.
I'm going to stare into your eyes.
You just literally go, Omakase, please.
And it's just like, whatever.
Like that's a very sexy thing.
Like as a woman, if a guy does that, I'm like, oh, fantastic.
Like, oh, it's so hot.
But another thing is like steak.
Like, everyone says steak and red wine is very sexy.
What's your take on that, both of you?
I think it's romantic.
You know, oftentimes you have that.
It is an expensive place.
Yeah.
You are going to take a longer time with dinner.
Yes, true.
As I said, my wife doesn't eat beef.
Yeah.
So it's sort of a one-sided sexiness in my life.
Personal sexiness.
It's like, I'm having a great time.
She's like, and they don't even have chicken.
Okay.
Autoerotic.
Mashed potatoes.
Actually, I think one of the sexiest dishes I ever had was, in fact, mashed potatoes.
Wow.
We went to the Joel Rubichon restaurant.
Oh, my gosh.
The one in Vegas?
Oh, in Monaco?
Amazing.
This was on a,
you know,
like the trip
before we had babies.
It was like my 30th birthday.
And yeah,
it was that,
so many amazing things
at a fancy restaurant
where you spent
like more money
than you've ever spent
on a food,
on a meal.
But then we couldn't
stop talking about
the mashed potatoes.
Just so like creamy, luscious.
I feel like I know the facial expressions you made at each other
as you put them in your mouth.
Because the Robuchon potatoes, it's like equal parts butter potato.
He uses the rat potato.
Yes, he does.
He found the perfect starch balance of a potato.
It's like a whole thing.
And the texture in your mouth is like a cloud.
It's insane.
It's one of the most insane food experiences
I've ever had.
I was having dinner
with my dad though
so I wouldn't consider it sexy
but it was
one of the most
insane food experiences
I've ever had.
Also,
a lot of the times
whoever you're eating with
is also a very important part.
Yeah,
Ned,
what's the sexiest eating time
you've had with your dad?
Yeah.
Cool, cool, cool, cool.
Stop it.
Outback Steakhouse 2014.
We got the blue man.
Yeah.
Do you have any like, okay, so mentioning
the steak thing, like to me
ordering food at a restaurant,
cooking food yourself on a date, to me it's all
just a reflection of like you. Everything you
do is putting out like a message that you want to send.
So for me, I'm never somebody that would want to like order a big ass steak or red wine or
anything because i never want to put off like hey i'm a big masculine guy and that's what you can
expect from me through this relationship because if i did that you would be absolutely disappointed
you know i'm more of the type of person who's like asking what farm the peppers are from on
the kingfish crudo, which is a real
thing I did on my first date and almost ruined it
because I didn't know that was a douchebag thing to do.
He said there was, he was like,
it's a habanero pepper, it's a habanero that's been
bred to take out all the spice but still leave
all that sunny bright flavor. That's interesting.
And I was like, oh, what farm is the habanero
from? Because I knew it was only
two farms, Kong Tao or Row 7
Seed Company. And anyways, turns out you don't want to show your hand that much. from because I knew it was only two farms, a Kong Tao or row seven seed company.
And anyways, turns out you don't want to show your hand that much.
Like you show the appropriate amount of who you are on a first date.
And then sometimes you leave the weirdness to yourself.
But yeah, I think like, you know, like since you already knew the two farms, you weren't
like asking to get polite information.
You were sort of trying to get the waiter.
I didn't say I didn't say I know there's only two farms.
I wanted to know.
And it turns out it was Dan Barber at Row 7.
So suck it.
Yeah, you knew what you were doing.
Yeah, a little bit.
And you liked it.
Yeah, a little bit.
A little bit.
But sometimes there's like, you know, you can bury a little part of yourself to only show the best part.
Sure, I get that.
I remember actually the first time I met my husband, the first time we like met, I baked a cake for my friend's birthday.
I made, so there was a period of time when I was like making cakes for everybody.
No, if it was your birthday, I was making you a layer cake.
You told me every single thing you wanted on the cake and I would do it.
So it's my friend's birthday and I bring out this big, beautiful, bright pink cake with sprinkles and like special candles and stuff.
And then that's when I think that's whenever he fell in love with me.
That's whenever he was like, you, he's like, you're the one.
So I think cake was actually the first one, not that dinner.
Sorry, I had to make a little loop de loop.
Little addendum.
Yeah, a little addendum.
So David, I know you're listening.
The cake was when you fell in love with me.
We know David listens because every time a podcast publishes, he texts both of us
and he's like,
that was a great podcast.
He gives really good feedback.
He always does.
Julia, come on.
At least give us an Apple rating.
What's the sexiest restaurant
you've been to in LA recently?
Do you have one? Oh, man. But not even LA. Just like the sexiest restaurant you've been to in L.A. recently? Do you have one?
Oh, man.
But not even L.A.
Just like the sexiest restaurant you've been to experience-wise.
I am blanking on the name, but I'm remembering the experience.
If you tell us the experience, we'll probably be able to deduce.
Yeah, we'll run.
We're sexy people.
Yeah. people yeah um it was a omakase place in new york in uh greenwich village nice and it was just
like ever every single they only did like only did sashimi every single dish was just amazing
decadent and then then at the end,
they did a table-side creme brulee where they're just taking out a blowtorch,
just making it very festive.
And it was all,
it's like a three-hour dinner,
just very romantic.
I'll have to look up the name of the place.
Three hours is a long time to eat.
Those are the best meals to me,
the marathon meals,
where you are just,
I love, especially like omakase and a lot of sushi restaurants,
you can kind of lose yourself in there,
right?
You get lost in the sense of place and the magic of the moment,
especially because it's something that you can't do,
right?
Yeah,
no way.
Like I've done,
you know,
crudos and stuff at home,
but I,
everything I have at like a nice omakase restaurant,
I was like,
oh,
I can never do that.
Of course.
I don't know where to find a freshwater river eel.
I mean,
I think actually messed up.
We do know where to find it. We know where to find it. We just don't know how to do it. Yeah, exactly. I don't know where to find a freshwater river eel. I mean, I think actually messed up. We do know where to find
it. We just don't know how to do it. Yeah, exactly.
I think,
I mean, sexy, it's something that's so subjective
because I'm now at a point in my life where like
I don't want to go to the
Joel Robichon restaurants. I don't want to do that. I want
to like find the hole in the wall
that I am very comfortable at and that serves
really dang food. And it's funny,
I actually sent Rhett and Jesse there as well.
This is B. Taqueria down in West Adams.
They do a...
Omakase, dude, keeps coming up.
They do a taco omakase.
It's the chef that used to work in Fine Dining.
He worked at Joe's in Santa Monica.
Oh, epic.
Yeah, that place is a breeding ground for chef talent.
And then he opened up his own taco shop
and decided he wanted to just do taco omakase for like four diners a night. And then he opened up his own taco shop and decided he wanted to just do, you know, taco
omakase for like four diners a night.
And so we sat in this table like under a palapa.
It's really in just kind of like a dirt tract.
And it's BYOB.
And I don't know if it's legal or not.
I hope I don't get them busted.
But you can just bring your own liquor.
And so we just bought a bottle of tequila and a 12, you know, 12 pack of Modelo, one
for the kitchen, one for us.
Good.
And then we just sat there with two friends just eating and drinking
and kibitzing the night away.
And then the freaking food was so unexpected
because we went there with roughly no expectations.
Sure.
And then he's like, yeah, there's a tree that grows bougainvilleas,
the flower, above the freeway.
And I foraged the bougainvilleas from the freeway tree
and then made a mole out of it.
And that was the single best taco I've ever had in my life.
And just gorgeous, elegant presentation.
It was one of those where we were there for like three and a half,
four hours. We're drinking with the kitchen.
Afterward, the dude was like, our card machine
is not working. Do you have cash? And it was like a
$400 meal. And we're like, nah, dude,
can we just Venmo you? And so we're like drunk in the parking lot
trying to like figure out a Venmo transaction
that's still legal and taxable.
And to me, like that, that was the sexiest dinner that I've had
because it was something completely unexpected.
Sun rays shining through the palapa.
And yeah, my favorite thing is finding that new spot
that I haven't sort of heard about or have any expectations of.
Because there's a sense of serendipity.
You've sort of stumbled upon it or you're discovering something together.
Sure, you can look up on Yelp a whole bunch of things or like a Michelin star thing and like curate the perfect experience.
And that's sexy in a different way.
But like when you're kind of like discovering something together and it feels like special, I think that's very sexy.
There's like a risk-taking element to it that I really like.
I mean, practice safe sex, but, you know, practice risk-taking meal behaviors
before it. I'm the opposite.
I love going to a place
that has, like, $5 signs
on Yelp. You're just bougie.
I know. You're just bougie. I am.
I'm not going to pretend like I'm not. I love
the whole, like, risk versus reward
when it comes to finding, like, a new spot,
a new hole in the wall, whatever. But, like,
take me to cut.
Take me to sexy steakhouse.
That is a euphemism for sex, by the way.
Oh, really?
Oh, I didn't know that.
Do you not remember that from the songs,
to get in the cut?
I don't know.
Maggie, can you Urban Dictionary the cut?
I have no idea what you're talking about.
Go on.
Sorry.
But no, for me,
I like the kind of extravagant opulence.
And I think there's like...
In the cut, Meggie.
In the cut.
Sorry.
But honestly, like I think going to those expensive, like lavish, like insane places is sexy to me.
And then sometimes it really turns me off.
Like thinking about like, I don't know.
In what context does it turn you off?
Again, it's like in the beginning stages of like courting i love it it's like yeah take me to this cool place that
has four dollar signs on yelp order whatever you want i'm just gonna close my eyes even though i'm
very particular about the menu and i've already looked at it like 10 days before but after like
being like married or with someone for a long time you don't want that anymore you know what i mean it gets tired it gets stale so i like it in the beginning but at the end i'm just kind of over it
yeah yeah in in the cut sexual intercourse yeah yeah how about that nicole can say it i can't i'm
not gonna say it yeah but now i learned a new a new word look at us look at us expanding our
vocabulary what what's like the most, romantic cooking memory you have with your partner?
Like just the best memory you have of just getting down.
Not getting down.
Getting down is another slang for sex.
Just like really like cooking something together.
Like a big project.
David and I don't cook together.
Ever.
Well, he definitely is my prep chef.
What does he do while you cook?
He works.
He works.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to like accuse.? He works. He works. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to accuse. He works.
He works. He goes and makes money.
Yeah, he goes into
the office and he works.
I like that. Please go.
He comes in and he helps me prep vegetables
and he cuts me things
and he helps me with dishes, which I really appreciate.
I'm the one cooking.
I'm the girl.
I'm going to come. I'm going to make dinner like i know it's very like kind of draconian to think about but like i kind of like it like i know it's whatever i'm the one cooking the meal
you eat it tell me if it's good or not and he always is very honest and always tell me if the
food like isn't the best or if it needs work or if it's delicious he's always very honest so
i don't have any of those like synergistic kitchen moments with him.
And I kind of like that.
It's my territory, you know?
I feel that.
You don't need to comment.
I won't go to the gym with Julia for that same reason.
This is my place.
Well, there you go.
Yeah, yeah.
There you go.
I think we're somewhat similar.
We're both like type A, like kind of like to be in control of the situation.
I'm so type B.
That's not true.
Oh, yeah. No, she's not. That's not true. Oh, yeah.
No, she's not.
She's a liar.
Am I?
It's like how you can't smell your own farts.
You can't tell if you're type A or type B.
Yeah, you're type A.
Am I really?
Yes.
I feel like I'm the most type B person whenever it comes to, like, planning stuff.
We can run out of time to psychoanalyze you.
Sorry.
Okay, continue.
No, you are type A.
Continue.
But, yeah, so we'll, like, each kind of have the dish that we're working on.
I find when you can find a good dish that you can collaborate on, that's great.
Very sexy.
Like pizza flatbreads, always a great dish for that because you're like, oh, what topping do you want to put on?
Yeah.
But one of the most delicious and romantic dishes that I can remember was something that Ariel cooked.
dishes that I can remember was something that Ariel cooked. It was, we had, it was just a simple pasta, but with a fresh basil, fresh cherry tomatoes from the garden, some pine nuts,
some really good mozzarella, just kind of like the cherry tomatoes are like lightly blistered,
just really, it just was like bursting with flavors. So sweet, but also everything was perfectly cooked.
And it's just such a simple meal.
And just one of those romantic date nights at home.
I was just like, wow, this is great.
This is awesome.
That sounded very sexy and very sweet.
Happy our kids are asleep.
I love that.
That's excellent.
Julie and I had this day during quarantine.
We would take up really big cooking projects because she's really into food as well.
And I would tend to give her, you know, the less flavorful elements of it and the more structural ones, right?
Okay.
So if like, you know, we're making dough and it's like follow this recipe.
And so, you know, we did this like we made a ton of handmade tortellini with like, you know, a braised short rib ragu kind of thing.
Great.
But, I mean, it took us like six hours to do this thing start to finish.
And we were just drinking wine alone in her apartment, like blinds drawn on a Sunday.
I remember just sending like a video of me singing our song by Taylor Swift.
Okay.
Shirtless in the kitchen, drinking wine covered in flour, you know, to one of my best friends.
And I was like, oh, I vaguely remember that. But to me
those like big all day events, I just
I almost yearn for it because we did that a
ton in quarantine. And then now it's like we have
their social obligations or family stuff
that you have to do. And now I'm just like, just lock
us in a room with some flour and eggs,
put on the T-Swift, grab a
bottle of wine and let's go.
That's so cute. I love love.
I really do. Yeah, we're I think we're all in that. We need like a detractor. That's so cute. I love love. I really do.
I think we're all in that. We need like a detractor.
Maggie, how much do you hate love?
Yeah, Maggie gave the middle fingers
of love. I feel that. You know what's not
a sexy food, but people think is a sexy
food. Tell them, Josh. What's the thing you hate?
What's the thing you hate?
The thing dipped in the thing?
Oh, chocolate covered strawberries?
Yeah. I thought you were going to talk about polenta because I talked about making polenta. Oh, chocolate covered strawberries? Yeah.
I thought you were going to talk about polenta
because I talked about making polenta.
Oh, polenta is sexy.
In college when I was baking it,
I would like, you know, invite girls over and be like,
hey, I'll cook you some food.
And for some freaking reason,
I would always make polenta with mushroom fricassee.
And now if I ever made that for anybody in my life,
I would just jump off the balcony
because that is the, it was Scott Conant's recipe too.
Nice. And no one liked
it. No one was happy. You think the
college girls, Nicole, on the
you pulled a number at a party drinking
natty light. Fricassee is not the thing
to make a college girl. No.
But no, chocolate covered strawberries
are not good. I'm not even sure cooking at home
for a college girl is really
the move.
No one wanted it.
No one asked it.
It never got any positive response.
It was always like, this is weird and I'm uncomfortable.
I'm sorry.
I'm just like, well, did you try the Chianti?
But on the subject of chocolate-covered strawberries.
So you think chocolate-covered strawberries are not romantic?
I just think they're bad food.
I think they're bad food.
I think they're romantic because they're in movies.
The idea of them is always more romantic
than the actual taste.
I think you're right.
Because the way that they look
and the act of dipping it in something gooey
that then hardens,
it's kind of sexy.
Ooh, yeah.
Nothing says sex like goo that hardens.
I don't know.
I mean,
it's evocative of like, you know, dripping wax or something like that.
Or like strawberries and cream or something.
But when you taste it, it's not great.
Like the chocolate is not good anymore.
It also wasn't great chocolate to begin with.
And then the strawberry is like way too large
you're not getting a good like chocolate
to strawberry ratio
I agree with you
what's the alternative what's the pitch
cheese fondue
but not strawberries
what's the sexiest thing to dip in cheese fondue
give me the short thing bitch
some Hebrew nadis
a piece of breadies A piece of bread
A simple piece of bread
Yeah that's probably right
Bread is sexy
I think make
Crudités sexy
Pickles baby
Give me some pickles
Crudités
Yeah
It's sexy
Give me like a nice
Pickle plate
With like a
Zatar yogurt in the middle
Sexiest vegetable on three
One two three
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber
Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber Cucumber. What did you say? Cucumber too? Cucumber. This is the gender divide, Nicole.
This is the gender divide.
No, no, no.
Celery root.
Celery root is hot when you make it into puree.
What do you, no.
Why?
Yes.
It's so sexy.
Sunchokes.
It's much.
It smells like farts.
Sunchokes make you fart worse than anything.
I was looking at someone in the office.
I don't want to out who, but they had like a dietary supplement to make you poo better.
And sunchoke was like part of it.
No way.
Yeah.
I didn't know that.
If your sexiest vegetable can be distilled into a powder to make you poop better, I don't think that's sexy.
Or, well, colon health is sexy.
There's nothing sexier than a healthy GI tract, Josh.
Come on.
Come on.
We're making kombucha cocktails all day, baby.
Something about the like, the things that are gooey, things that are like, the oysters,
it's like they're slippery.
Sushi is also kind of like, I feel like there's just something.
Are we just looking for foods that remind us of sex?
Of just lube, yeah.
Any food that's self-lubricated.
It's just we're looking to just lube up our mouths.
I will say, the thing about oysters is.
No one's like, call crackers are sexy.
Unless they're chicken in a biscuit.
Those are good.
No, I will. Okay, so Ned and I both went to cucumber. Obviously, chicken in a biscuit. Those are good. No, well, okay.
So Ned and I both went to cucumber.
Obviously, it's a very phallic food.
It's green.
Green's a sexy color.
It's like the Jolly Green Giants.
Dong.
Sorry for saying dong on the podcast.
Green is not sexy.
But no, there are many phallic foods out there, and there are very few yonic foods.
Yeah, uh-huh.
And also, there's not a great antonym for phallic other than yonic.
Yonic.
Which is, that's about it. That's a new one I'm learning.allic other than yonic which is that's about it
ever related to yoni
which is Nicole the feminine divine
sure any whom
you know more than I do more yonic foods
that's how we're ending this
alright Nicole and Ned
we've heard what you and I have to say
Now it's time to find out what other wacky ideas are rattling out there in the universe
It's time for a segment we call
Opinions are like casseroles
Alright, Nicole, first up, you want to take a crack?
Sure, thelifeofet says
Chocolate covered strawberries, okay, are only good if the chocolate is melted fondue chocolate and the strawberry is cold.
Hardened chocolate makes a mess and doesn't stick to the strawberry once you've taken the first bite.
We already talked about this.
We've covered it.
Yeah, they know.
They know what's up.
But they're adding the fondue element.
Nicole, you think poking and dipping is sick.
I like poking and dipping.
What is fondue chocolate?
I don't know if I'm familiar with that.
It's just melted chocolate.
They probably add a little bit of cream to make it like ganache.
And you just kind of dip and you go.
And it doesn't harden.
So it doesn't harden as much.
It doesn't harden as much.
It kind of gels.
It gets like fudgy.
Fudgy.
It gets all fudgy.
Yeah, the melting pot.
Now that's a sexy restaurant.
You got a couple screaming kids on their birthday.
I've always wanted to go to the melting pot.
And I've never been.
And I know Justin Bieber loves the melting pot.
I really want to go.
Is that a ringing endorsement for you, I guess?
I mean, I don't know.
I don't like the guy.
I don't dislike him.
But if Justin Bieber likes it, I want to try it at least once.
I mean, yeah, at least once.
He's sexy, right?
Yeah, he's a sexy man.
He's a sexy man.
We got at BlackGhost54, I would let cheese pull all over me whenever it wanted.
Oh, yeah. Just like wrapping around you me whenever it wanted. Oh, yeah.
Just wrapping around you like a hot blanket.
Oh, yeah.
I just,
nothing like mozzarella sticks
to get you in the mood.
But, I mean,
it's true.
Looking at cheese pulls,
that's like,
especially on online videos.
Oh, what kind of online videos
you watching with Ariel
huh
it like tweaks
the pleasure center
I mean it just gives you
a boner
after a decade
you know you need to
keep things all spicy
just watch some
nice cheese pull
listen I know it's fake
in the pizza commercial
but it's real to me
yeah
that's kind of
it's like a satisfying
it's like
you're just like
oh
like it's whenever someone like takes whipped cream and like swipes the whipped cream so it's like a satisfying you're just like oh like it's whenever
someone like takes
whipped cream
and like swipes
the whipped cream
so it's like very even
it's a satisfying
like your pleasure center
just goes
beep boop boop
like I'm awake now
same thing
no I don't want to
eat the cake
I just want to watch
someone make that
I don't want to
just like to sit
in the corner
and watch baby
just kind of
open the little blinds
in the closet
that's again
with the gooeyness
I think cheese
is objectively disgusting I love cheese is objectively disgusting.
I love cheese.
Objectively, it is the grossest.
If you think about somebody who has never heard of what cheese is, right?
Okay.
It's like, have you ever been to the cheese section of a grocery store?
I love it.
It just smells like feet.
You just took cow titty milk and you just let it rot until it just kind of pulls and stretches like a mucous membrane from the body.
Well, yeah, when you paint it like that, Josh.
Yeah, that's what it is.
What do you mean when you paint it like the reality of the situation?
Of course.
It is a disgusting food.
I enjoy it.
Well, how about this?
How about you're taking cow milk and fermenting it so it can have more flavor and you add a little bit of bacteria.
I'm not doing really well.
I'm sorry.
That's good.
Never mind.
Oh, yeah, that's sexy bacteria.
Bacteria.
Sexy bacteria.
Sometimes.
Okay, next up.
This is me.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
JG, how do I say this?
JG M Fan says, the most sensual way to prepare and consume liver is in mousse form.
And what's the most sensual way you've prepared a liver?
I mean, for my wife, it's to just throw it in the garbage immediately.
I would say, like, you know, something spreadable, right?
Like, you know, just like a pate, which I guess is what they're saying.
Yeah.
They're on the right track.
I like.
I don't have a ton of experience.
It's oftentimes the giblets come out and Ariel's like, ew, gross.
I'm like, but we could do so many things with this.
I like liver.
I think it can be sexy.
I think any food can be sexy if you
try to make it sexy.
I'm trying to think if there's a food that you couldn't make sexy.
I mean, if you, okay, if I
pan seared a really good liver,
like a chicken liver or like a beef
liver, I think it could be sexy.
I think so. You'd have to really gussy it up.
We gotta give liver a new name. We have to rebrand liver. I think it could be sexy. I think so. You'd have to really gussy it up. We gotta give liver a new name.
We have to rebrand liver.
What's the French word for it?
Like, I don't know, but thymus
gland is sweetbreads.
Thymus gland is, when you think about it,
eating a thymus gland,
that's freaking gross.
Yeah, second date, I ate thymus gland
with Jules. But like, whatever.
She understands food.
It's super hot, man. What does the thymus gland with Jules. But like, whatever, she understands food. Hot.
It was super hot, man. Birdie G's.
What does the thymus gland do?
Is it like hormones?
I believe it's part of the endocrine system. Yeah, it regulates your
body. Bro, it's just
straight up. Your body's
gonna go through changes, you see, and Ned's
gonna regulate it. Oh, man.
It's not that a mousse is the sexiest way
to prepare liver, it's that every other way is incredibly
unsexy. Yeah, it's true.
And also, yeah, Jules doesn't really mess with liver
that hard, but I would have made a lot more
pureed livers. It's got a very distinct smell,
but then again, so do oysters. Yeah.
I make my mom liver sometimes. I'm not really
sexy. Yeah. Never made
David liver. Never made any sort of, like,
partner liver. It's not a sexy food.
I don't know. I'd love a good chicken liver mousse.
And to me, it's a very sexy food.
The liver at Alimento is another sexy date night restaurant.
Alimento is so sexy.
Very intimate.
I had the most insane pasta experience there.
The tortellini and brodo was probably the sexiest experience I've had with food.
It explodes with cheese mush in your mouth.
That's sexy.
It was sexy. Exploding sexy. It was sexy.
Exploding goo.
It was delicious.
It was the most,
like,
my feet started to, like,
tap on the floor
when I was eating it.
A little toe curler
from the pasta in the goal.
Yeah, it was insane.
Alimenta's great.
Who else has a really good
chicken liver toast?
Animal.
Animal.
Remember that?
Oh, no.
I was going to say Bestia,
which is Italian for animal.
Bestia's Italian for animal?
I mean, like, ish.
What?
Anyways, here we go.
At SogGoth69.
Nice.
Sex and food never mix.
It always ends up with things that shouldn't be sticky getting sticky in a mess to clean up.
Keep the kitchen and the bedroom separate.
Anyone want to volunteer?
I'm going to pass on this one. I'm grossly opposed
to it. I like the smells of each separately.
Don't like the smells of them together.
Especially when it's aerosolized like whipped cream.
No, that was an experiment that I'm never
going to do again. I never got that. But I think it's
like you should have the experiment.
Oh, you got to do it. You should try it. You're not going to know
if you haven't tried it. You should try it.
And then you can know, do I ever want
to do that again? Ned, it sounds like you've done more than experimented with it, man. No, I think we did it. I think't tried it. You should try it. And then you can know, do I ever want to do that again?
Ned, it sounds like you've done more than experimented with it, man.
No, I think we did it. I think we did it about once.
And that was cool and all.
And then, yeah, everything was sticky.
And that was that.
Yeah.
I'm going to have to lay down a tarp.
I firmly believe in compartmentalizing your life.
Food is a big part of my life.
And I can't have the food come into the sex part
just not at this point in my life
you don't want to turn yourself
into an ice cream sundae
what's that fetish called though
it's something like
smoshing but it's not smoshing
because smosh is the company that exists
I don't know but it's a thing
my recipes
from my food blog were very decadent yeah Meg if you're going to search it good luck the recipes I used to recipes from my food blog were very decadent.
Yeah, Maggie, if you're going to search it, good luck.
The recipes I used to write for my food blog were very decadent.
And once they ended up on this Tumblr that was called like, you know, like I love food or food love or something.
And I was like, oh, it must be another food blog sharing my stuff.
And I click in and it was just naked people smashing themselves into cakes.
Sploshing.
Sploshing, not smashing.
Some results may be explicit.
Is this on the work server? Delete, delete, deleteoshing, not smashing. Some results may be explicit. Is this all the work server?
Delete, delete, delete.
Research.
They don't cover themselves.
And sometimes it's like sweet stuff, chocolate syrup, sprinkles.
And sometimes it's just like a bunch of gravy.
It's pretty cool.
Shout out.
We're not king shamers here.
And we talk about omakase a lot today.
But for an early Try Guys video, I was a sushi model.
Oh, no.
Which is the vibe of eating sushi off someone's naked body.
Yeah.
That was like a deal.
It was a little strange, a little kind of, what?
How did you feel doing that?
Vulnerable?
Yeah, I felt objectified.
And then, you know, it was a little ticklish.
Oh, my gosh.
And then we invited the entire office, like an office-wide email.
Anyone who wants to can go as, like, free sushi.
Didn't tell them what it was going to be.
And that was embarrassing.
That was a thing.
You learn a lot about who's taken sushi off you from where.
I feel like it says more about the people than you.
Right, right.
You know?
Yeah.
Remember how you put ranch on your body?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
And I audibly gagged the whole time.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This is not like an old story.
This is Friday, the last work day that we had been in here.
I was shirtless on the countertop where we cook all of our stuff,
covering myself in ranch.
For a photo shoot?
Yeah, it was like a bit.
It was a bit for a TikTok.
So if you can't.
I have no shame. i'm like gross but then
when it comes down to like actual sex and food no i don't want that good yeah i'll cover myself
in range for a bit of course god this is two days after covering myself we don't want to give away
when stuff's shot but i covered myself in a maple syrup in a baby pool just days before that correct
sumo deadlift says avocado toast that is done correctly is kind of sexy, low key.
Oh, wow.
Okay.
I wouldn't have thought of that one.
I believe you have a morning after.
Do you have a morning after avocado toast in the book?
I think we do.
Yeah.
That is our avocado toast.
I remember reading that and I was like, that is a good time for avocado toast.
That is where my head was going.
It's like, you know, avocado toast not sexy
unless it is
the morning after.
Yeah,
if you can whip out
just a really stellar
avocado toast
morning after.
It's impressive.
A couple fun little garnishes,
you know.
Yeah,
it's an impressive breakfast.
Is breakfast sexy?
Morning after breakfast,
certainly sexy.
Do you have a morning
after breakfast, Nicole?
I used to make eggs benedict.
Oh. I used to make Eggs Benedict. Oh.
I used to turn it out.
Oh my God.
What kind of,
what was the hollandaise?
Double boiler?
Yeah.
How'd you?
I would be very impressive.
I would pull out a,
just whip out a hollandaise sauce.
I'm an impressive young woman.
You're like,
if last night didn't impress you
when we jumped in this morning.
I would make Eggs Benedict
and they'd be like,
wow.
And then one time
I microwaved the Eggs Benedict like a dummy, like a dummy, and it broke.
And I was just in shambles.
I'm like, I'm so sorry.
I microwaved all of it.
And he's like, it's chill.
Don't worry about it.
I'll just have some toast.
But Eggs Benedict used to be like the meal after.
And it was good.
It was impressive. I just always have the meal after and it was good. Yeah.
It was impressive.
I just always have the things for a frittata, you know, and you say frittata, it's kind of sexy.
Frittata.
You know, but I'm not proud of it.
That's like a.
Frittata is a sexy egg.
Yeah, you know.
Sexy egg dish.
I need to get a better morning after meal.
Also, sumo deadlifts.
Anyone who says sumo deadlifts, don't count.
I think that's a gender bias. What is a sumo deadlifts, anyone who says sumo deadlifts don't count. I think that's a gender bias.
What is a sumo deadlift?
Sumo deadlift is where you split your legs out wide and you hold the bar from the middle in between your feet as opposed to hands on the outside of your feet.
Oh.
You deadlift it that way.
Oh, sumo squats.
Women tend to be better.
Yeah, yeah, sumo squats.
Women tend to be better at sumo deadlifts.
I know a sumo squat.
General sort of hip structure.
Yeah, yeah.
So shout out, you know, do your sumo deadlifts.
That was my pedestal.
All righty.
We got add moped Sally.
Whipped cream smells awful after 20 minutes.
Not for use in the boudoir.
Okay.
Well, somebody doing more than 20 minutes.
Okay.
Okay.
I see you bragging.
Okay.
20 minutes.
I'm already showered.
I don't know.
I'm in front of the TV catching up on break in bed.
There's one way to fix this and it's Cool Whip.
Hydrolyzed oils, ladies and germs.
And it's cheaper?
Yeah.
You don't have to do the noise.
It can be kind of off-putting for some people.
That's nice.
I say just go mayonnaise.
You know what?
Ew.
Go away.
Oh, you and your ivory towers over here.
You need a timeout.
You need a timeout.
Yes.
Gross.
It won't give you a rash, though.
Ew.
That's so much.
Mishkin09 says, drizzle honey on anything, and it's sexy.
Is it like bee vomit?
You know what honey is, right?
Bees that vomited up?
I wasn't thinking of it in terms of that.
You do.
You just got to start thinking deeper.
You know, cheese is just...
They had me at drizzle.
Honestly, they had me at drizzle.
You could have said drizzle and then anything,
and I would have been like, yeah.
Drizzle of mayonnaise.
Stop bringing mayonnaise into this, dude.
Honestly, if you could thin it up and drizzle that bad boy,
I'd be like, oh, yeah.
The halal guy's like, sauce, bring that into the bedroom.
Jeez, please.
I think drizzling honey on certain things is very sexy, like on a beautiful piece of brie.
Go for it.
Drizzling truffle honey on a piece of, I don't know, osso bucco might be good.
But not on everything.
On some things, yes.
You know what?
My morning after
That's been successful
And it's very true to myself
Nice little fruit and yogurt parfait
How about that
A parfait
A parfait yeah yeah
You know
You get a nice glass
It's a little like
I'm running out the door
To my Pilates class
But it could be sexy
Again
I try and temper
People's expectations
Because I think
A lot of people Especially when I was Singling on the apps, it was like, not to brag, but like 6'2", a lot of my photos are me flexing and lifting.
So I want to put that forward.
But then I'm like, I want to subdue your expectations of that.
So we're eating a nice seafood, heavy, elegant dinner, drinking white wine, and then eating a yogurt parfait in the morning.
That's sexy.
Take a light breeze.
That's sexy. Not going to be too heavy.
Slow you down.
All right, last one here.
We got at pawbarian.
There isn't a way to shop for zucchini that isn't sexual.
It's easy for me.
I just go in there and I pick up some zucchinis and I put them in a bag.
It doesn't need to be sexual.
Sounds pretty sexy to me, Nicole.
Ned, what's the sexiest time you've had with a zucchini?
Well, you know,
probably like shooting a video
where you're testing out sex hacks
and putting a condom on a zucchini.
Yeah, that's...
That's actually way less sexy to me watching you
put a condom on a zucchini than just
putting it in a bag at Ralph's.
Yeah, probably. That's pretty...
Does that mean I win the sexy competition?
Nicole wins the sexy competition. I win!
Yay!
What is it?
People are sensual.
Vegetables are sensuous.
That's an obscure reference to the movie Animal House.
All right.
All right.
On that note, let me scroll to the part where our outro is.
Despite the fact that I've done it 90 times, can't remember what to say.
Oh, thank you for listening.
We thank the listeners every time.
They're entitled.
That's absurd. If you want to hear more from us here in the Mythical Kitchen, we got new episodes for
you every Wednesday.
If you want to be featured on Opinions Are Like Casseroles, you can hit us up on Twitter
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And for more Mythical Kitchen, check us out on YouTube where we launch new videos every
week.
And of course, if you want to share pictures of your dishes, hit us up on Instagram at
Mythical Kitchen.
Ned, thanks so much for joining us and talking about uncomfortable subjects. Congrats on
having sex to produce two lovely children.
Amen. Where can people find you?
What do you got to plug? You can check out the Date Night
Cookbook at datenightcookbook.com
Beautiful. It's a really great cookbook
and it is like very, it actually has
a utility, which is a thing that like
not a lot of cookbooks do. I agree. Like buy it,
cook for your partner. If us talking
about how much we love cooking for our partner didn't sell you over the last 45 minutes or so nothing will but
yeah really awesome job ned good stuff thanks y'all take care