A New Untold Story - A New Untold Story: Ep. 277 - "U Nutted '93"

Episode Date: February 3, 2022

|| A New Untold Story: Ep. 277 - "U Nutted '93You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/anuspodcast

Hey, A New Untold Story listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen to ad-free on Amazon Music. A new untold story, episode 277. Seven? I forgot already. What a journey it's been. We're almost to 278. Thoughts, Kyle? It's such arbitrary fucking filler intros.

You have to. No one gives a fuck about the fucking number episode. But you can't just like go in hot we should go in mid-convo it's cool but that's not what we just sat down how we're gonna fake it it should start mid-convo why because i think it's cooler that way who wants that i hate when people try to like force an intro in real life i hate when people try to force... Me! I hate when people are like, oh, and welcome back. But that's every show ever. We're on episode 278.

Yes. Yeah, what do you do for movies? What do you... Yeah, do you like fast forward 15 minutes into movies? Sometimes. No, you don't. Yeah. What movies? When HBO does like the recap intro, I'm like... You've been on a Marvel kick. No. A nice little voice... Kb went on like this tangent

he's like so anti-marvel that why like they're just fun when did i go on a tangent it was off camera yeah i don't i don't watch them personally but you you were kind of care you made disparaging remarks towards people that do like them did i yes yeah but well yeah it's i don't care i don't care. You made disparaging remarks towards people that do like them. Did I? Yes. But yeah, I don't care. I don't know why you're invested in that. No, I'm not. But I think they're just simple, easy to digest and fun. What what's the issue?

I don't think they should be dominating Hollywood. They should be dominating cinema. They should be dominating pop culture. But why? They're simple, easily digestible, and fun. Notice how you didn't say they were good. They're simple,

they're easily digestible, and they're fun. I don't think they're simple or easily digestible anymore. I think that's what they were when they were meant for kids, and now they're meant for adults. Yeah, I guess I've fallen off.

Everything is Easter eggs and hidden... Oh, yeah, yeah. I guess you have to watch like 300 hours of like premium cable shit. They're fun. They're spectacle. Yeah, a lot of things are fun.

Yes. No, but no. No, I would say that most things aren't fun. I said a lot of things are fun. I would even say no against that. I said, yes, most things aren't fun, but a lot are. I wouldn't even say a lot of things are fun. You're right. Name 10 fun things. I said a lot of things are fun. I would even say no against that. I said, yes, most things aren't fun, but a lot are. I wouldn't even say a lot of things are fun. You're right.

Name ten fun things. I can't. You can't. I can't. There's a green screen behind us. We figured we'd put the creative control into your hands, the viewer. You can put anything you want behind us, as long as it doesn't say, feel dicks gay. Feel dicks gay.

You could, you know. And people, we're still letting people don't say that they're actually and it's insane that it's working and don't fast forward this because this isn't an ad because we don't have them kyle what we don't have them anymore felix gray yeah are you surprised by any means we really don't we really don't the website crashed because of my put on this weekend the website crashed the website really there was that big of an influx most when you picture like a website crashing you think like a temporary like oh a 404 error this you don't know what that is you did you agreed that had to have been a surreal moment for you it was it was all right i gotta get to the bottom of this you started wearing glasses

two weeks ago yeah the compliments have been off the charts somebody uh in the back walked up to me and kyle and they were like so what's up with this glasses thing you guys are doing this dude didn't realize that i've been wearing glasses forever he thought we got in this kb and nick like what you guys started wearing glasses he was yeah they were just like oh so it's like this is the glasses bit now that you guys are doing i'm just like i you've always i've always worn them but i am so so... This kind of proves your point. I've been wearing glasses since first grade. Yeah, no one knew until now. Right.

And it took for you to be wearing them to people to see that I'm wearing them. No, I've been getting destroyed. What do you mean? For the new look. This weekend, I stepped out. I'm like, I'm going to shave my my face which i've done before and i'm gonna put on glasses which i've also worn before i don't like it when you shave your face because your upper lip doesn't move very much okay so yeah i did this have you noticed that yeah it

looks like the cgi henry cavill superman when they got rid of his mustache yeah it looks fake i got a lot of comp i got a lot of remarks look at that i know i get it so i step out can you just like i went 28 years where i've just like been invisible to others no one has ever commented on how my appearance in any way yes they so i step out on a weekend go out you literally step out you didn't like figuratively step out you weren't doing that what is a figurative like a metaphorical metaphorical step out oh i'm stepping out for the night you weren't doing that what is a figurative like a metaphorical metaphorical step out oh i'm stepping out for the night you weren't doing that you were leaving your house yeah both okay i went out no no no no i'm at the club jesus christ with jeff and a crew a crew of what a crew of

of hoes and yeah this is this helps the and he takes a picture of us i don't i knew he took the picture didn't know we posted it i'm feeling myself i'm not i don't feel like i'm cool but i'm like getting drunk and then i look at twitter and he posted the picture of us and the first reply is like how uncomfortable i make people look. So you were both... No, there is... So then I'm just... Let's see. Your lips are really red in the picture.

I look like Rachel Maddow. You look like Rachel Maddow. KB clean shaven and in glasses makes me capital very uncomfortable. Tom Noland. Lesbian. Semi-masculine lesbian. Okay.

But I think there's a decreasing list. Elaine from Seinfeld. Silent majority that thinks you look great. The after picture in a Hannah Gadsby fitness progress post. KB looks like he went to a Halloween party dressed as both main characters in Juno and placed second in the costume competition. and placed second in the costume competition. KB looks like he just boofed enough kratom to make his grinder dates dick numb.

He's the first person to suck dick to successfully temper withdrawals. KB looks like a make-a-wish lesbian English teacher, which is just a lesbian English teacher. A woman English teacher, yeah. Looking like a discount Jeopardy Amy. What is consensual sex looking ass? KB looks like he tried to sneak a flask of raspberry twisted tea

into a TEDx talk at Emerson College and then moaned when the security guard confiscated it from him. KB looks like he QB sneaks himself at Brockhampton concerts. So I'm at the club and that's the only thing in the back of my head. How whack how like, because when you go out

you're like, you never think about You get to that level of drunk where you see yourself in the mirror and you're feeling really good. You're always like, yeah people might be judging me, but that's just my anxiety. Like no one actually gives a fuck. No one's looking at me and judging. That's insane that you would check comments the night of. I know.

Yeah. But once you see one. Yeah. Hard to put them down. So do that. You're still wearing them though. I know because I'm in that gray area, the Felix Gray area where

if I stop wearing them, then I let the Internet dudes and the trolls like bully me out of it. But hasn't your mom even said something? My mom even said something. Did she? Someone said I look like Mrs. Doubtfire. You are nearing your Robin Williams era.

Yeah, you're close. You're like the end game of it. Nick is the Mrs. Doubtfire of the crew. How so? You're known for your misses. And you always doubt fire music that I put you on. Well, that's tough to fucking see that said about you and then like oh that's how i come across to others and you were with a gaggle of hoes i was and did that affect your confidence around yeah everybody do you think they thought that do you think they just

well in the back of my head, yeah. They probably think a derivative to an extent of what other people have said. This is what I'm afraid of. You and Jeff both wore glasses out. You guys don't both regularly wear glasses. It seemed like you guys... This is the adult version of Juris Day.

Soaking wet lesbian. Wearing a Juris Day to a bar. It looked like I tripped and fell at a pride parade and fell into a puddle of Megan Rapinoe sweat face first. That's what we're saying. Shit like that. How do I how do I like go out with confidence after that? How do I like let's go to the next bar. Let's do it.

So you ended up going to another bar. Yeah. You went to the queue. I did. Which is the gayest bar, not in the city, ever in the world. I told Pat where you went, and he, out of hate, called you the F-slur.

And he meant it. It was so gay. It was a driving factor in my move. He regretted how he was cornered. It was on the corner of my old apartment. And you went there. And you sent us a picture of like... You never went, but you've seen?

Yes. What do you know about it? There's lines seven nights a week outside the queue. And it's like 50 to 100 people. And it's... It's costumes, I would say. There were... Yeah, there were like...

There were guys like fucking. Actually... There was cages. Did you hear gay sex memes? There were men in GSMs. And there were guys like fucking actually cages. Did you hear gay sex? There are men in GSMs and they're gay. They're guys stripping. And like, did you like going,

did you see, did you see dicks? Yes. And did you like look at them? I was so drunk. You wore the glasses to see the, see the dicks better. No,

I was so drunk. There was like a mirror in like one of the rooms yeah and i was like i like was walking toward it because i thought it was like an extension to a new room yeah and i thought my reflection was another guy and i got in a juking match and like i looked over and like the people i was with like noticed it and i was like i'm out yeah that's that's definitely a sign but you got a hotel that night just for your enjoyment just got it yeah just for your enjoyment because you you don't like staying in your apartment i did i did yeah and you just got a hotel just to fly solo in yep you were banking on pussy no no okay sorry now people are gonna think i blew my money

on a hotel and didn't get pussy did you neither of those things are true what do you oh i got pussy somewhere else where'd you get pussy? I didn't. The bathroom of Ketch? I didn't. I heard you got in trouble at Ketch. Jeff D'Lo told me you were pretending to be a hibachi chef. Gone are the days when I can just go out and live my life. It's barstool,

barstool, barstool. It's everything. Monday to Friday. All of my thoughts. I'm like, I'm going to escape. And now, everything is documented. You're like, I'm going to Friday. That's all of my thoughts. I'm like, I'm going to escape. Yeah. And now everything is documented. You're like, I'm going to escape. I'm going to go to the gayest bar I could possibly go to. What do you mean I can't have fun?

You're not going to be able to have fun at the company party tonight. Because everything you do, zany, fun, or regular, will be out. Yeah. And all eyes are on you. I'm not like the type. I don't get drunk and do anything crazy. i think that's a really lame trait that's just cowardice it's something that you wanted to do and you get drunk enough people think people think that like you're in a this is an adult company yeah the extent of what you're going to do is you're going to get drunk

and talk to people louder and more expressively than usual yeah that's what that's the extent of what you're going to do is you're going to get drunk and talk to people louder and more expressively than usual yeah that's what that's the extent but everybody's like oh my god what's gonna happen party like who's gonna get like no that's nothing's gonna happen who's getting the drunkest i don't know like somebody and no one will know nobody will know he's just gonna be like talking the loudest it's it's the same thing like there's always a drunkest like in this room somebody has the smallest dick and it's funny to think about i don't want to know it's just like a drunkest i think none of us none of us have the smallest amongst ourselves no three of us have pubes yeah three of us have pubes oh tyler's in here tyler is in here as well working that third camera because this is a tripod whoa no you're saying i you are you saying i don't have

pubes you don't have pubes at least three of us do you don't because it's the most obvious thing in the world i see is it obvious i see no pubes when you're putting on your bird why don't you guys think i don't have pubes they're bird dogs kyle we could see like when i'm wearing them you can see a bush bulge but kyle for you smooth it goes from i have pubes navel to the genesis of your penis bird dogs are amazing they are yours i'm wearing mine kb get in those joggers without underwear on that's exactly what it says why don't you show off the flexibility no why don't you describe the flexibility hop on this desk and perch up like a poison dart go to birddogs.com and enter code anus and they'll throw in a free bird dogs beanie you want to see promo code anus and boom a free bird dog

would that help the ad or not i'm actually oh and showed the flexibility i i'm actually pissed off you didn't say a venomous frog because i would have had the chance to correct you i said it right i know just seems like something you'd let me such an annoying trait to have i love hopping on things like that that must have helped you with like the geography and just like honing your writing like all that time you didn't have to spend shaving pubes yeah exactly i i've had pubes for such a long since i was into geography that's not true since i was post um since swaziland became e swatini yes so what year is that the modern map Is that 98? It's pretty, no. Is it not?

It's not. No. When did it happen? I don't, not too, a long time ago. A lot has happened since. What, what do pubes smell like? What do pubes smell like? Like, like burning.

Like, oh, you know, oh, you know exactly what they smell like. Yeah, I do. Because I can't get the smell out of my nose. He's so damn close to his nose. My pubes are so long. It's like, yeah, sometimes. Gelled so they spike up right to your nose. I have a cowlick above my dick i feel like i'm winning this debate

but i still have pubes uh who's to say we'll agree to disagree i guess kyle well poor noise showed you some love us that's he's always showing kyle and a thing that was pretty cool That was pretty cool. It was. Pretty cool to get the shout out. And I owe him so much. Yeah, I do too. He made this life happen for us. That's right. He gives us the platform to be relentlessly bullied for being lesbians every single day.

And I'm pretty thankful for that. I don't mind it. I was getting it regardless of this job or not. I just like the attention I don't mind it. No, I mean, I've gotten it my... I was getting it regardless of this job or not. Yeah. I just like the attention, yeah. You do you? Yeah. Is that why you're still wearing glasses? There's been like periods of my life

where I felt like invisible. Like when? Like my last job, I would like go in and I like sometimes I was like, I had this theory in the back of my mind that like I didn't exist to others. Oh, Jesus. You weren't like the funny guy of the office no you didn't make quips no did you share an office or was it your own off like

yeah it was like it was all women and like so was mine but i was the funny guy were you yeah i wasn't my first day of the office they made me take a quiz what starburst flavor am i and i got orange and then like half the office just called me orange man for the next three years that was the best part of like office jobs is like that was like the highlight of a week yeah an entire company yeah like just like talking about what starburst flavor you are and i don't even like eat starbursts i would never choose them that was the extent of the. I was orange, man. So be it.

Could have been worse. I mean, I guess there's two like offensive ones that could be. Pink. Don't think so. He's thinking of cherry and lemon. That's right, Owen. That's OK. Thank you, Owen.

No, no. Did you have like, give me like, I want to hear more about your professional before this. Because it's hard to imagine you outside of this. Yeah, so it was a small office building with about 11 women and me. Average age. Plus me, not including me. They're probably like 34 okay so you were their work husband did anybody ever call you work no that's the thing like the no one talked to me

i had a work wife it was bad really yeah we never like did anything it was just like the emotional support how old was she she was older she's probably in her 50s that had to feel cool yeah i guess so coming on to you no no no it was completely uh it was just like a support system and it just happens okay i fucked her raw that's implied remember the era when big dick energy was like a a thing and it was a tommy tommy smoke still thinks it is yeah he tells me that every day that you have it yeah it's not a compliment what does it Like, imagine like your defining characteristic, like the emotion you exude is like a vision of a big juicy cop. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, you instill the image of a throbbing boner whenever you're just your general presence does that. When I see you, I don't see just a penis. I see one that I could choke on. Yeah, that's that's what you give off. And I see every minute vein of that phallus. Congrats on having big dick energy. Congrats, yeah. Thanks for making me think of that.

Also, tiny clits. What about them? We were ranting and raving about them the other day. I went to go, when you were out with those girls, I was definitely. Which night? Sunday, Saturday, Friday, or Thursday. It doesn't matter for this story because I was home alone for all of it. you were out with those girls i was definitely night sunday saturday friday or thursday it doesn't matter for this story because i was home alone for all of it hold on i'm thinking about what i did wednesday okay no tuesday thursday friday saturday or sunday it was saturday okay

i went to go get a tattoo i went to go get uh my favorite pod racer ben cuadraneros just a line drawing of him. And the tattoo artist was a cunt. Who is Ben Quadraneros? I've heard of the name. What's a pod racer? I don't know anything. What is it? I heard of the name. Pod racing. It's a sport.

Is it from a show or a movie? There's a pretty popular course on Tatooine. So it's a Star Wars thing. Yeah. Okay, just say that. I figured you knew. I thought you were just like talking to me. But I wanted to go get my favorite pod racer tattooed on me.

He's a lot of people's favorite. Good racer. I showed them the picture of Ben Quadraneros. I get more hate than him. Let that sink in. You're trying to be something you're not. He is more liked than me.

Yeah. So I brought in a tattoo artist and the dude was like a bitch. He was a cunt. He was like, I'll do it for 400. And I just want to let you know, I have no interest tattooing this. So I won't be taking any pictures. I was like, all right, man, that's fine. Like he wouldn't put it on his Instagram.

And then he drew it. He was like, you know that. Yeah, he drew it. And he was like, you know, this looks like a clitoral hood, right? I was like, Ben Quadraneros, the alien. I'll show him to you. Jesus. What is a clitoral hood?

Beats me. That does look like what I would imagine a clitoral hood. I don't know. What the would imagine a clitoral hood I don't know what the fuck is a clitoral hood though I think it's like are they veiled by a layer of something else it's a Bronx community

of lesbians oh shit we stumbled into the clitoral hood I really hope they're real sensitive here i really hope you like anger the like the like bronx lesbians i i don't want to i want to see nick getting jumped into the clitoral hood you like yeah you just have to eat out some like pretty masculine woman for like 45 minutes i have to eat out the most masculine pussy

like it's such most masculine pussy. It's such a masculine pussy. You'd think it belonged to a man. But it's still like clear cut a pussy. But it's masculine enough of a pussy that I'm eating that it makes me gay. Certainly. You know what I'm saying?

You know those kind of pussies? Fellas, we're all picturing the same pussy yeah we all have that image in the head that type of pussy yo paul paul has eaten that pussy i could have paused you so long ago for what i don't know he's got a really cool pod racer though it has like crossed laser beams so i might just get the pod racer tattooed on me. So did you get it? Didn't get it? Didn't get it. How would the exchange go? You probably apologized profusely. I? You probably gave him a tip.

So sorry for wasting your time. I can still pay for like half the tattoo. I'll take the drawing. That's definitely what happened. Yeah. But it was like I went to a tattoo shop in West Village which was like the most pompous shit ever. Yeah. I need to go somewhere dirtier because these guys it was it was outrageous like the clientele going in there were just like very it was all it was all asians getting tattooed really shocking to me yeah huh so yeah the clientele was yeah just off-putting i didn't

say that. I just said it was like they had like this wealthy aura and they were getting kind of like a lemon starburst. Exactly that, Owen. Exactly that, my friend. We got to keep talking because we have sponsors dropping like flies. Actually, this is Dude Wipes is coming back are you sure i think kyle we but they know and i waged war the boys like when we talk highly about toilet paper like it's ingest and i think they realize that uh they they asked us for input i went up and talked to the sales team for dude wipes and i said like the name implies that women can't use it but they can so now they're putting

an agent into the dude wipes that burns vaginas so women cannot use them it's fantastic it's an anti it's an it's a yeah it's an anti-pussy serum that you must have fell into as a child. I never fell into that. No, I didn't. I never fell into that. Oh, I dropped the baby into this vat of anti-pussy juice. That's what seared his pubes. That never happened. It seared your pubes right off.

I know I always had pubes, but some of my limitations are because I was supposed to be a twin. What does that mean? Twin. You came out. Twin. You came out. I was conceived with a twin what does that mean the twin they they you came out twin you came out i was conceived with a twin brother god built you he thought you so i bet you feel stupid now is that true they could only is that the lymph node on your neck one oh yeah semi-pro choice that's right um sorry love you but anyway no you were lucky enough to have the anti-pussy serum singe off all your pubes but the rest of us have to use manscaped manscaped it's an awesome product

i was conceived in 1993 born in 96 how long were you in there nine months you were born in 993 yeah so what why would you bring that up? I'm just thinking, you know, 93 was a tough year. Why? How would you know? You were there for like two months of it. My parents had to give up one of their child. And they chose, did they choose? They didn't have the capability to choose which one wasn't going to... They couldn't afford twins.

And so they had to get rid of one. Yeah. That's allowed. You didn't absorb the other one or something for nutrients? All right. Anyways. I was trying to live

the workshop a bit. Well, let me finish this. Hold on. We'll talk at the same time. I can make the twin thing work. While you're thinking of make the twin thing work. While you're thinking of making the twin thing work, I'm going to talk about the Ultra Premium Collection.

It's a package Manscaped gives you. It gives you the deodorant. Okay. Not for your balls, but for your armpits. It dries clear. It's aluminum-free. Hydrating body spray, the body wash. Twin Bowers were attacked. Twin Bowers were attacked. And's a freak. Twin Bowers were attacked.

And my mom called it the tragedy, the you nut it 93. That's what your dad did. Your dad you nut it 93. Yeah, good, good, good. There's four products, a gift inside the ultra premium collection. What a score. Twin's Minnesota. You can get 20% off plus free shipping with code ANUSMANSCAPE.COM. It's 20% off plus free shipping with code ANUSmanscaped.com

it's 20% off plus free shipping with code ANUSmanscaped.com the power of attraction is now in a bottle from Manscaped you got anything no uh um

I'll think of something I kind of like show I like to show people that i have flaws that you can't well i mean you got the twin bowers you think that was a stretch more than you nutted 93 you nut at 93 is good no that's rock solid that's wrong that's actually a great shirt to get dads like you nut it not 93 and like yeah like a presidency campaign shirt we'll make that that'll be in the stores that'll be in the store i guess because yeah because it'll it would sell to both 93 babies and 93 dads oh maybe the abortion used up a box cutter oh that's good oh he was a c-section

yeah he had the box cutter pussy's box's box. Yeah, they're right. Hold on, is there a ground zero? We should do the, yeah, this is all it takes. Pentagon. Three brains. Okay. Logan Airport. Okay. Yeah.

Hijack. I think we I think we may have tapped it nah that's cool though little look behind the scenes KB one of your soldiers

is getting cancelled real one too real one what Whoopi Goldberg cancelled yeah she said the holocaust was like white versus white.

What did she say? She's just making some Holocaust remarks that just don't need to be said. Did she deny the existence of it? No, she said it was white versus white. Jew isn't a race. This was like, she's downplaying, it seems. Okay. Which is tough.

Her first name is like a child's exclamation it's tough for her to be goldberg which is whoopee goldberg is goldberg yeah what the fuck she's that's her that's her own people that's is that a stage name i never even thought about that brother i never crossed my mind that her name was whoopee goldberg i have some news for you brother she's not jewish no yeah she's such a lovable person yeah yeah her name her name translates to who's next i guess i guess it really does yeah who's gonna get farted um yeah she's just bored she's old as. She's been famous for so long. And Matt, like what? It's always the ladies of the view. She doesn't feel anything.

It's always the ladies of the view. They are a cast of characters. They are the worst slice of culture to ever exist. It's an ironic name for a panel of ugly women to be calling it the view. Yuck. They are, yeah. Star Jones, get out of here. You know every character.

No, I don't. You know the nuances of all of their... Julie Chen. I don't even know anything about it. Really? You don't know anything about the viewer? I know Bing Bing Fan, Jessica Chastain. Well, that's the cast of the 355.

Yeah. And her name's Chan Bing Bing. Bing Bing Chen. I'm a Bing Bing head. I fought with her name's Chan Bing Bing. Bing Bing Chan. I'm a Bing Bing head. I fought with her, yeah. You fought with Bing Bing? I'm just going to tell you straight up, like on the poster in the subways, it says Bing Bing Fan. Yeah, they... But her name is

Fan Bing Bing. Fan Bing Bing. It's like an Ichiro Suzuki thing. Much like that. I like how they give you the option. I would like that. My boy Maresh, my Indian boy Maresh gave me a Rangers jersey that he said he's not wearing. And so he said I could have it. And it's a Rangers jersey that just says Maresh on the back. So I'll be rocking that.

Maresh number one. First name. Yeah, why not? I don't think there's ever been a. But he taught me, speaking of Jewish people, there's Indian Jewish people. There's a name for them. Hindu yeah yeah that's right they they were like really really little head wraps on the back is this real i'm sure there's like they have like a billion people there's bound to be some i don't know if it was like a separate culture though no no it's yeah

it's it's them yeah it's yeah, it's, it's them. Yeah. It's pretty cool. He's not one of them. Thanks for the Jersey though. I'll be wearing that next time. Uh, it's the Indian Jews. What people over nine 11.

Yeah. Do you have any, did you get any more? No, I was trying hard. I was too. And that's why I really wanted to make that a thing yeah okay so the premise of the joke is what uh-oh you done you don't those off-putting

what is i'm i don't care about the male gaze why not that sentence was that's funny i'm done like trying to let like what the the male appearance of like dudes are dming me left and right about my appearance why do you care so much i on yeah i don't know why i don't get i don't get too many comments about my appearance my beard's gross right now that's about it but you know what fuck it fuck. Fucking face for radio. Nice. Face for radio.

And I have a dick for Jerry Maguire. And an ass for Snow Dogs. I know exactly what you're doing. You took all the good and I got the charm for Pearl Harbor. Come on. Cuba me. and I got the cheekbones for Pearl Harbor. Come on, Cuba me.

Cuba gooding. You're about to have a Cuba Miss Crisis. That was alright. Fuck you. It's a Miss N and L. You put the L in LGBT which is lesbian like no

alright we're running out we're running out you wanna get out of here the LG with your beady eyes wait in line at the queue

yeah L are you gonna go back ever wait in line at the queue yeah l are you gonna go back ever that bar um you got the music was fire you gotta lose some lbs g you want to fit into that t telling a bunch of fat lesbians it's a bunch of fat lesbians and you're just like yeah you're gonna lose some l all right yeah submit a video oh okay going up to a fat lesbian gotta lose some lbs i like that just make sure they're not in a clitoral hood. Oh, we got to stay out of the clitoral hood. You'd never find it, KB. The hood? Yeah.

All right, let's get out of here. That account, Hood Clips, is definitely a white kid, which is funny. Definitely. Hood Clips? Yeah, the Twitter account, or is it Instagram? Every Twitter account that's along those lines is a white kid yeah black princess problems do you remember that yeah which is a very niche problem unless you're like a white there's a huge account like can white people have black princess problems if it's just like i don't know if anybody can i got myself a black princess problem you got a real that like

instead of a blonde moment yeah black princess moment oh man we should go home yeah let's get out of here kyle thank the people for listening thank you guys for listening it means the world every comment every view view, every subscriber. And let's crank up the five stars. We're sitting at 4.9 right now, which is kind of, well, it's embarrassing. It is. And the 5.0 would look aesthetically pleasing. A ton more people watch than subscribe.

If you could subscribe, that'd be cool. I noticed that, yeah. That'd be cool. You're a subscribe, KB. Getting fucked in the ass and writing about it. This is exactly what I'm talking about. Sometimes there is a limit. This was one of my self-loathing episodes.

When you don't pile on. I said so many insults about myself for once. It's just so annoying. You look good. It's not even like that. You had to like scratch and claw to make that pun work. Oh, and you're a subscribe. Writing about getting fucked in the ass.

That is. Yep. There we go. See? No harm. No harm. You want me to reject your reply to what I'm going to say? No, you're just going to say like, no harm. It's a fresh big untold story A new untold story