A New Untold Story - A New Untold Story: Ep. 282 - (OYOYO)'Malley

Episode Date: March 10, 2022

|| A New Untold Story: Ep. 282 - (OYOYO)'Malley || 0:00-48:00 - Nick & KB discuss the history of beauty, inventors getting laid, & much more || 48:00-1:07:00 - Grace O'Malley joins the show to discuss third titty money || Full episodes also available on YouTube || Thanks for listening!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/anuspodcast

Hey, A New Untold Story listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen to ad-free on Amazon Music. A new untold story. I'm going to get the episode right today. Episode 283. 282. Fuck! God damn it. I like it when you mess it up.

Yeah, it's kind of cute. But I can't be mad for too long because today's episode is brought to us by Cuts. The shirt that will never break. Ever. Even if you try to break it. Good luck. Kyle, you wear Cuts. Is that a Cuts shirt right now? long because today's episode is brought to us by cuts the shirt that will never break ever you know even if you try to break it good luck uh kyle you wear cuts is that a cut shirt right now this is the was the creamy mocha but you're asking me but you i know you know because your closet's full with creamy mocha yeah this is it this is the one i was rhapsodizing about maybe it was off camera

yeah it was yeah just. Yeah, it was. Yeah. And that was like a typical conversation that we have, you and I. Yes. Yeah. So I'm wearing it now. High tech. Looks high tech. Is that a wire?

Yeah, I think that's a fucking wire popping out of it, dude. It's not a wire. No, it wouldn't protrude. Yeah, you're right. No, no, only by design. It's showing off how technical it is by just having a wire. Yeah. That's how high tech it is.

And it's, you know. Other shirts just look outdated. And this is bold of me. Most companies, they advertise a product and they don't actually show it off. This is for you to consume. Tell me what you think. And this ain't a mannequin, honey. This is on skin and bone

and a little bit of muscle. You do look good in it. Damn good. You could tell there's a real good bod lying underneath i'm just tired of looking good in things i'm gonna look good well you look good that's what cuts does it makes you look good it's like you don't look good in it you look good you look good yeah it cuts out all the bullshit and you guys can get cuts uh for 15 off when you go to cutsclothing.com story s-t-o-r-y

c-u-t-s clothing.com story 15 off it's the only shirt worth wearing in my honest opinion kyle you've been looking incredibly handsome as of late you've been reminding me of um who's your co-host me and uh and i've been like thinking about the idea of handsome and like pete davidson being popular everybody's like this ugly motherfucker is getting they're pissed he got well he was fucking ariana grande and now kim kardashian and you're for you're you're skipping some some hotties between. Who am I forgetting? Liv Tyler.

Beckinsale. Yeah, Beckinsale. Kaya Gerber. Kaya Gerber. Janiya Ka. Yes. I think Larry David's daughter. Yes, Kazzy.

Was it Kazzy? Sounds right. It's probably Kazzy. Yeah, he's ugly for them ugly dudes dating hot girls turn straight guys gay because they're just like this ugly he's not hot at all a hot dude should be fucking her yeah it turns guys into like like like roger ebert's of male attractiveness yes two thumbs two thumbs down. For me, I look at... Roger Ebert was the most dying man of all time

when he was dying. He was always dying. He was the most dying dude. Even when someone said, Roger Ebert called it a four out of five. I was like, something about that is grim. Yeah. Just the way he died.

Look up late photos of him he uh you there was no mistaking that that was a dying man but since like we were children he was like like critiquing flubber i was like yeah this guy's about to die and he gave flubber like a two thumbs down he hated flubber he hated flubber yes which it was fun for what it was it worked what was he expecting it to be he thought it was going to be some like coming of age sci-fi film being a children's movie critic or critiquing children's movies critiquing anything children children yes that as a profession it's criminal borderline yeah but anyway uh we were talking about handsome and then we went got to roger ebert which is the biggest jump of all time don't know how we got there um do you have a picture of him actually i kind of want to

i'm feeling like being haunted right now he's's dead now, right? Oh, yeah. But not long. He's... Doesn't matter. I can't find it. I look at Pete Davidson, I just see like a silhouette. That's how I look at all men. Really? I don't know if he's attractive or not.

That's a dying dude. Wait, that's him? Yes, dude. That's him yes dude that's him yeah that's that's a syndrome yeah no i think he had jaw cancer you remember those ads like the guy like the anti-tobacco ads yeah the guy who lost his jaw yeah i still remember i think it was a group something grew in was it and he that picture haunted me forever. I never want to have a syndrome. He was like a hunter.

I never want to have a syndrome. Those were everywhere. A hunter? Yeah, he was out in the woods. He was just like, I dipped with my dad, and now look at me. Okay. Jaw is the worst body part to lose. He lost his jaw, yeah.

Yeah. Thanks for hammering that home. Yeah, I have an irrational fear. Something about the way I said it. I'll ever have to get my jaw wired shut wired shut? yeah you had your jaw wired shut?

for a month did you lose a bunch of weight? you grew a foot? I don't think that's correlated you're probably just amidst puberty that has nothing to do with your growth all the growing just flows out of the open mouth point that you grew because your job no it was just coincidental oh yeah it was uncorrelated um but back to like the handsome thing i'm just i i'm so late to the game of people being like

this ugly crohn's disease riddled dude is fucking girls. I should be fucking. Yeah, it's weird. It's weird. But then I was looking back. The last time society was correct about a man being handsome was Elvis. That's the 50s. Give me an example of someone who was incorrect. The following decade, fucking Beatlemania.

Those dudes. Women would chase the beetles through traffic to like and then like there's even when they open their mouths if you didn't know they were from england you'd think that they were a parodying england that you cut you oh you caught me oh my god and then they probably said they just shag you girls were fighting to fuck Ringo Starr. People fucked Owen Wilson. Yeah. Yeah, and he has a mangled face. He had flippy hair, though. But even I have benefited from society being incorrect on what's attractive because I was in high school when Twilight was popular.

And it was just very, very pale, scrawny guys. Yeah, translucent guys um that acted gaily and i'm not saying that it worked but like in my head i was just like this is what girls like and then they had to add like a classically attractive taylor lautner to make it more realistic but like elvis elvis was hot i was reading the guy that was like writing his biography and he was like he had this excerpt. Australian guy? Was he Australian?

Maybe. Oh, okay. I was reading. He has like a German name. Yeah, it was something. But I was reading an excerpt, like not in the book, but he had like a side note where he was like, I just like need to clear this up. I'm a heterosexual man. But looking through some pictures of elvis i gasped and then doing more research honey men walking by elvis would gasp on how beautiful he

was i'm just like that's first of all you're not a hetero if you gasp at a man if you make any audible sound at a man you're not if i'm walking with you and a dude who i can recognize as handsome walks by and you go yeah you're a i'm gonna i'm gonna tell you to pause yeah big time yeah immediately yeah i would never make a sound making a sound at a man but that's how beautiful elvis was but then we've just been wrong ever since what do you mean i'm like what's a like i i personally like that was the last handsome man that society all agreed upon was Hed. Yeah. And then we went to the Beatles.

The guy who invented the Rorschach test. Yeah. I think his name was Dr. Rorschach. He was actually hot. Was he hot? Yes. The Rorschach test. Ernest...

The inkblot guy. Yeah. Rorschach. Yeah. I'll go to bat for him. And I'd swing a Demarini and pinch hit for Ernest Hemingway. He was actually hot. Wait, was Hemingway hot?

Yes. Not even adjusted for inflation. Okay. He was actually hot. Stalin was okay. Stalin had good hair. He was fine. But some of the other, who were the historical hotties?

The 20s sex symbols were just like overweight men with giant guts and they were just like oh he's strong and that was like they would just be like he's wealthy kissing for digging forward to binge eat that was like royal times okay what are you where are you at what era like like strong men like leads in like 1920s movies like or even later just like the fabio prototype leads fabio yeah he was yeah he was like the handsome prototype of like the mid-90s all right speaking of movie critics like anyone who calls a movie from like the 20s or even the 40s as like a 99 out of 100 like so the best movie of all time you're speaking directly to je Jeff and Ken Jack. I am. You both gave Seven Samurai, which was made in like 1918.

If a movie was created in 1950, it's worse than every movie created now. That's correct. That's just how it is. That is correct. Don't say this is, yeah, say it's the best movie of its era, but don't say it's better than any movie created with modern technology. I would rather watch fucking that awkward moment than fucking seven samurai incredible movie but yeah that awkward moment yes every single person would enjoy that awkward moment more than seven samurai yeah but they'll

watch seven samurai and pretend like oh this, this is... This is brilliant. This is beautiful. Yeah. Efron. It was in that awkward moment. We were right about him being handsome. That's more recent. But he was a boy.

Yeah. But it's all, like, white guys. I think... Who was, like... There's no mixed... Mixed ethnicities are the hottest. Yeah. I love how historians just completely disregarded the fact that people were

not white. Yeah. And there's like, yeah, Jesus is white. Yeah. All of the, all of these people from the middle East.

And they painted him to be like sexy too. Like that was like a rugged, good looking man. Yeah. Yeah. The one, the crucifix in our church was almost erotic they made a lot of them they like chiseled his body like somebody but they gave him a cloth but his dick is popping out from the bottom

of the cloth the slightest bit oh so like you have to be close it's it's like it's a treat you see in there was like like the bulge of his, the bulge of Christ of his appendage, his dick appendage. Yes. And we were, we were like, we were little boys. We were like,

Oh my God, Jesus is dead. And I remember like the teachers would try to defend it. Like that was the best sculptor of the 20th century who made that yeah so he of course he paid attention to detail yeah and that's part of it don't sexualize jesus they did but like uh the sculptor you didn't have to you didn't have you didn't have to you don't because i bet you in gethsemane mount the mount the mount all mount of olives when he was hung when he was bleeding from his wrists yeah hanging as hung was he was hung there too yeah

i bet you was he didn't have like a dick imprint i think your dick shrinks when you're getting crucified um yeah yeah uncommon misconception most people don't think about that no you the Yeah. Yeah. Uncommon misconception. Most people don't think about that. No. The last thing you think about is the change of dick. That was my thesis. The change of dick size when... Herman Rorschach looks great.

Let me see him. Wait, what was your thesis? The effect of crucifixion on dick size. Oh, of course. Yeah. That's a pop-up. pop up you played a slide show that's an Indian woman that was an Indian woman

oh god damn yeah he was hot and he's trying to distract people but on the flip side they're saying Barbara Bush is one of the hottest no and she's not she looks but like on those hottest lists is there any like is there

any it's all white people and i don't like them yeah white people are good looking but she looks so average is there a fucking black tie affair is there any mixed race on there no no god no okay stalin was the blackest it was pal cleopatra even like yeah yeah well like she was like sexualized as like the most beautiful woman she's synonymous wasn't she like 14 but didn't people like go to war no people went to war for Helen of Troy speaking of which what

I don't know Cleopatra looks basic yes she looks like if I met Cleopatra at a bar I'd fuck but I would not be happy about it. She looks snarky. She got bit by an ass.

That's what she writes. Did Marilyn Monroe do it for you guys? Actually, kind of, because I know, like, let's call a spade a spade. When you went to a girl's place and you saw Marilyn on the wall, you knew. Yeah, there's two types of girls like in our era. If you go back to their place, if they have Marilyn hanging up, you know. And if they have Audrey Hepburn hanging up. Hepburn, yes.

Get. Get out. Get out. That pet deer having bulimic. You can't stay for nothing. You got to get right out. You can't stay for nothing with Hepburn. Because those girls fall hard

i'm not trying to i'm not trying to stay the night i'm not trying to have breakfast at tiffany's uh cleopatra looks yeah jackie kennedy jackie kennedy big woof i I get JFK now. Augustus Caesar looks like Mark Zuckerberg. Does he? If he was made of stone instead of invented Facebook. Have you ever looked at King Tut? He was a deformed boy. What an ugly boy. I'm saying Alexander the Great. He had rickets.

He may have actually had rickets. Yeah. Alexander the Great looks stupid. He looks like a deformed tix. So who would you say is the first hot guy? He looks like a sneaker head from Pembroke Pines, Florida, who spray-paint-stenciled XXXTentacion's death date on a clean pair of white forces and tried to resell them. Yeah, he does.

87,000 likes on TikTok. Quit his job at Publix to pursue that. Yeah. Louis XV. He's not hot. What's that Roman numeral? Louis XIV, Sun King. He looks like Quinn X-C-I-I.

Thomas Edison. Ugly. Yeah. He ironically looks like he only fucks with the lights off. Oh my god. Who else you got? Nah. I want you to see my face too.

I just don't want to like flaunt my creation. I don't want to be like that guy. Yeah, you don't want to be the guy. Fuck me with the lights on. No, you're using me for my invention. No. I don't want to be like that guy. Yeah, you don't want to be the guy. Fuck me with the lights on. No, you're using me. You're using me for my invention. No. I tumble. Let's turn the light on.

Fucking ugly. Yeah. Graham Bell. Alexander? Yeah, he's just old and ugly. Was he always old? I think he was always old. What if historians found out the first ever, like, super hot guy was Judas?

They'd scramble. The Catholic Church wouldn't know what to do. Yeah. Because people would be like, okay. Do your thing. Seth. See, Seth was not hot. No.

He was, like, a very inbred. Yeah, a lot of them were, which is fine. Well, no, Seth wasn't inbred. a lot of them were which is fine well no seth wasn't inbred he was just no no alex is calling me again he's probably drunk are you talking about graham bell hello pretty cool huh yes alex i know you gave me this privilege i know it's cool we've hammered this home i'm just like tired of you i don't know it's just annoying like yeah like like we're like talking like we're having this conversation despite being in two different locations and that's because of me you owe me fucking inventors has to be the worst

depending on the invention yeah so i'll agree with that yeah just agree with that i'm just trying to think of a alexander graham bell was probably a sex past e night what did do? She invented the paper bag. Oh. Oh, yeah. That would have just came about regardless of humanity. Yes. You don't need to invent that. That would have happened, like, organically. Yeah. It would be so easy to be

an inventor back then. Nothing existed. Yeah, you just, like, gather things. Nothing existed. Nope, this is this. Yeah. Che Guevara could get these, get these straws. Get the what? He's hot.

It's pretty much the girls are just, I don't know. The girls are all just bland. Who's like the guy that invented like the machines that like you would like hit a domino and they would like the... Rube Goldberg?

Rube Goldberg. I bet you he was hot gold rube goldberg you think rube goldberg those i bet you rube goldberg and ven from the diagrams those guys were both hot that was probably the ugliest rube goldberg was probably rube goldberg was just like what did he like he's probably had to spend years making one yeah and just for for what imagine like bring a girl over and showing her did he look oh yeah is he black that's a black and white photo and he's a he's tan i guess okay do you have gum in yeah all right am i chewing obnoxiously well Well, it's just, it picks it up. Yeah, it's fucked up. No, but now's a perfect time. You don't have gum in your mouth, so now you can eat HelloFresh.

That's pretty good, right? You think? The curry box. It's always the curry box. What else? The soup tostadas. That's like a hot, if you can get the soup to start is before they sell out uh i recommend you go snag those real quick but uh you don't have to pay full price you

go to hella fresh.com story 16 and use code story 16 for up to 16 free meals i'm sorry to interrupt you now uh but somebody in this office is sponsored by kratom because there's an entire inventory up there that's right upstairs. Upstairs. Are you battling temptation? I just don't know who it would be. Well, it's certainly not us. How is it not us? How is it not us? We're basically a

Kratom podcast. I don't think sales listens to the podcast. No cocky shit, but I probably did so much wonders for the Kratom industry. Yeah. Yes. There's blood on your hands, I bet. Yes. Yeah, and money in theirratom industry. Yeah. Yes. There's blood on your hands, I bet. Yes. Yeah, and money in their pockets. Yes. Yeah. You've done wonders.

That's outrageous. And do you see what our ex is up to? Dude Wipes? Go to the Dude Wipes Instagram right now. I know we're doing fucking commercials for them. Go to the Dude Wipes Instagram right now. Don't make me. They posted a picture of your face. And tell me if it says follow back when you click on Dude Wipes Instagram right now. Don't make me. They posted a picture of your face. And tell me if it says follow back when you click on Dude Wipes. Because mine didn't.

Mine said follow. From the anus account. Yours or anus. Doesn't fucking matter. Dude Wipes doesn't follow us. We follow them. Oh, yeah. They follow Kate.

What? Joey Molinaro. Yeah. Caleb Casey. Yeah, not us though. Raw Meat Experiment. What's Raw? Dinguses of Dingus.

What's Raw Meat Experiment? Sir Kurt Interstellar. Yeah, they posted me. They posted you. They got 187 likes. Pretty good. Any comments calling you cute? Compared to the 551 on the next one.

It just says, Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car. That got 551? Yeah. Oh, my God. What are the odds that's like Festooli doing freelance work for Dude Wipes? It probably is is it probably fucking cleopatra looks like a fucking freelance writer you think she writes sat political satire for mcsweeney's shave their or she grew out her armpit hair oh yeah george floyd rally

yeah she's technically african oh man yeah she didn't she that she's never done it for me cleo no no i don't know who the first hot woman was we kind of went on the tangent about the men being hot yeah and we said like we don't see the attractus we just pretty much we're hypocrites how so i was just judging men no i think that's fair these guys put themselves out there for edison put himself out there to be judged all right um before i didn't that wasn't bad you didn't laugh at my i All right. I didn't. That wasn't bad. You didn't laugh at my, I made a black tie affair joke.

Like with the mixed races. What? I made a black tie affair joke. I don't even remember you saying that. When I thought of that, I was like, hey, he's going to love it. It's like, oh, there's like no like hot mixed races. Like there's no black tie affairs on that list. Black tie.

That is good. Yeah. Maybe next time. Just just listen instead of thinking of your next pun no just put the phone down everything yeah well do you want me to let's just let's just get the phone do you want me to be a vessel to respond to you or do you want me to like constantly like thinking of how i can be more entertaining so myself that's when like i get so do you want people to listen to solo podcasts running at once if i would have been conscious people want to hear a conversation i was obviously brainstorming if i would have heard you if you would have grabbed my attention and say kyle look at me how about there's never been a black tie affair yeah but like yeah you know because everything like ablation girl like ablation fouquet girl yeah and i would have i would have snickered would you have incessantly i mean maybe sometimes we want more than men shouldn't giggle

no that's like i said last episode the gayest thing a man can do is make the heart symbol with their hands yes i almost just did i swear to god i swear to god if you guys are do fucking not use that phrase it's gonna have a feel you know i was just giving it it was just like singing along to ludicrous I don't know, man. I was giving an example. That seems like you wanted a loophole to do it. No. Oh. It was like quote tweeting Freddie Gibbs saying the N-word.

I didn't do it. I wanted to show. I wanted to give an example. Dude, I got a DM that started with, yo, F. Gaisler. I got a DM and I was like, okay, I got to click this. And then some dude was like, you did the bullfrog wrong. And I was like, what? He was like, the bullfrog, you did it like this? You got to put your pinky down there to give him a tongue.

I was like, alright, alright, dude. And he said, don't fuck it up. He was like, you're embarrassing. But that got me to Gaisler. I've been getting that too. You've been doing... You've been... I've been warranted there was that guy that looks exactly like you playing with a kitten on tiktok he doesn't look exactly like me so here's the crazy

did you guys see it it has different hair he has different hair a septum piercing no facial hair and like a tattoo on his forearm yet he still looks exactly like doppelgangers rely on like similar like uh accessories yeah or like facial hair yes nicks yours are lazy sometimes they're usually just a beard and glasses yeah glasses people love finding you that's that's my issue though like um i always look incognito beard glasses hat like i'm I always look incognito. Beard glasses, hat. Like I'm on the lam.

There is a squadron of men out there just looking for you. I have common face. Looking for doppelgangers. I'm plagued with common face. Babe, what are you doing? This guy catty-cornered to us looks like Nick Turrani. Babe, who the... Oh, like from KB? You may know him from kb

shit no fuck you no we've brought this up before but like when that group of girls came up to me they were just like oh my god uh nick we love your videos and then then they looked at you and they're like hey kyle they love my videos but not yours yeah i remember this oh yeah this was this is becoming ancient history it'll happen again once weather warms up and the nick fans start coming out of the woodwork shit remember that i'll even it up megan making money money's husband only asked about kyle not you i said both both of you, but he's intimidated by me. People

use you to get to me. I don't think. You're approachable. I do get, let me meet Nick. Come on now. It's always a tough, girls are like, I'm with them, I'm fucking them. The next morning, they're like the next morning they're like invite nick to brunch i want to meet nick he seems so funny no well we you and i grabbed

brunch the other day and we walked past like this like really cool architectural like looking bubble seat that was like permanent permanent fixture and kyle like he i was like walking he like tugged my sleeve and i was like what's up man and he tugged my sleeve he's like dude he was like dude and i was like what are you good buddy and he's like yeah man i thought i lost you for a second but anyway i was like what did i say about the architectural bubbles you looked at me dead in the eye and you were like i swear to god nick when i saw that i could see like i could picture you fucking a 10 out of 10 model on there. Oh, no. You looked right at me.

There was a pier on the East River. Yeah. No, it was me, IBM, and CP. Yeah. We were all together, and you, like, you pointed to those and were like, guys, what do you see when you see this? I saw that. Is CP 3-0, or is she in her 20s? CP2.

CP5. 6. 2. 6. 7 don't know don't care um don't give a fuck no i saw you saw it and you're like nick when i saw that i didn't even like think of me sitting on the chair all i could see was you fucking a 10 out of 10 model on that thing you you said that about yourself no you said that to me kept trying and you were like dude i'm trying to look at this chair any other way and all i can see is like all the ways you nick could fuck a model on it i was like yeah man i guess and you said you saw that for like a lot of things i was like come on let's go get some lunch and you held on to my pocket and we walked and got lunch okay fine the 10 out of 10 model used to be redundant but i guess now we have to use it yeah now you do have to use it because there's a lot of there's a literal there's a down syndrome model yeah that's and this is not this is not gonna like

even like hit our point this is gonna do the opposite because i was like she's we did we almost we almost not attend but we almost did our first ever emergency pod when that came out because you used to fuck a girl. You sent me the picture of her and I said she looks exactly like a girl I had sex with once except a little bit hotter in the face and much bigger tits. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, models nowadays. And the part is like i wanted an excuse to talk to her again and i was like i can't use this but it's such a good excuse have you considered modeling and you sent her that picture i was almost like you look like one of like the newest

victoria's secret models but you look like this new one you look like this yeah she you could really make it if you tried but again not an insult doesn't look syndromatic no but there are some models that she does you could tell but i mean yeah you can't i have a feeling like all the dads in the world were mad about that like it's like dads in the malls used to love to just walk past Victoria's Secret. Yeah. And now it's like a moral conundrum. Also, it's not like a turn on to look at just loose lingerie. No. Dads did think that was like the hottest thing. They always went by the whiff.

Are you going to see that model and just be like, I got to get that set for my wife. Are you going to see that model and just be like, I got to get that set for my wife? What's the, what's, because it's modeling for them is being a billboard for them, but selling the product. I don't want to, I'm happy for her. Also growing up, do you remember how like most dads were like, yeah, in order to score your wife, I really had to be persistent. She hated me.

Yes. She wanted nothing to do with me. I had to be persistent she hated me yes yes nothing to do with me i had to keep trying and trying and trying one chance we were like we were ingrained with like the idea of like that's how you that's how you'll meet your wife yeah you have to like she's gonna reject you persistently and you have to just keep trying yeah and like movies back then even were like the dudes had to like publicly embarrass the woman. Every movie. Yeah. It's like the cafeteria and he like stands

up and he like takes a shit on her table. Now so many guys think like that's like their soul mate. Their soul mate is someone who doesn't like them. Give me one fucking chance. Just like I know you. You're a fucking weirdo. Their soul mate is someone who is not attracted to them, hates their personality and just settles

off of persistence. Oh, and he has one fucking chance. He really wanted me, so I finally broke down and said yes. That was like the love story. Every mom, I finally broke down and gave him a chance. God damn.

Weak-ass dad. Weak-ass dad. You break him them down you don't get the girl you wanted you get a broken down version of that girl yeah you're right i just want to break you down so sing it sing and i had to in that case i just want to break you down so i miss the outros yeah i do too it's a shame we can't do that anymore. You're just not allowed to use music at work for anything anymore. That's insane. Yeah. We can't just put a song.

Yeah. Goddamn. I would have had a good one for today. What would it have been? White Tiger. Bye. Izzy. Oh, oh, White Tiger. Owen owen puts you on oh roller coaster that was uh that was like

the big song senior year of high school no but that's no but it's what like the coolest kid in my school that was his like warm-up song for lacrosse so was it the j cole remix or her original version uh her like a SoundCloud remix. I'm afraid to even put on anymore. Why? Because you've been missing? No, it's like, yeah. I don't think put on should have to be the first time someone's trying it.

You could re-put on, right? Yeah, you could re-put on. I got bullied out of listening to my favorite music because of the responses to my put-ons. What was the... You posted yesterday. It was like... Yeah, it was Beautiful Light by Upper. Yeah, you said, I dare y'all to... And say y'all.

Yeah, you did. You have... I don't... No, that's one thing I refuse to do. You speak in a tone... It's disgusting when Northeastern guys say y'all. did you have you i don't know that's one thing i refuse to do you speak you speak disgusting one northeastern guy saying in a tone on twit on instagram stories that you don't in real life like you posted one today what was it also you're not using it like a southern y'all no

you're going urban i'm going it's you and all beige and you say something light what's that mean something light is what guys, it's like a humble flex. Like, this expensive thing that I'm doing or purchased or flaunting is something. It's nothing to me. Word on a Wednesday. We have a new show with Kate coming out that we haven't talked about at all. Yeah. It's kind of like a ridiculous ridiculousness i'm probably the deer deck you're probably the chanel west coast you're always giggling and deer deck and i share birthdays that's good that's and you're i don't know morphing your body to become recognized unrecognizable yeah no i'm excited

about that yeah that should be good. And Owen's behind it and Hank and we have it with Kate. So watch that. So it started, you saw a girl DM'd you thinking you were the Instagram, Barstool Sports Instagram. I was very new at Barstool at the time. So that girl had to have been the dumbest of the dumb. She was hot too, from Miami. Yeah.

And then I immediately latched on to that bit and then i just stole it and made it my own for two years and now it's my bit yeah on it was for on instagram yeah people loved it people love it and just like kb's the guy and you're getting the same dms i'm just posting posting them yeah it like started as like she dm'd me and i was like fucking with her and uh kyle i made it seem in that first blog like i sent it over to kyle but kyle was like hey i gotta run upstairs really quick and then he dm'd her and he was like hey i heard you had some trouble with the borstal instagram yeah i did and it was just because she was really hot yeah well you jump at content opportunities that also have a little bit of pussy yeah yeah that's why we're doing a podcast right but uh yeah the show will be good there's

what like a hundred thousand deleted submissions from the instagram yeah yeah so we have the legal rights to use the rejected barstool thousands of like there's thousands of people who send in videos to get on barstool instagram every day yeah and they're so bad yeah yeah a hundred thousand and we get to look through them and post them ourselves and uh i don't really we're going to pick out one that's the worst of the worst they're all bad they're all horrible and we're going to pick out one that's the worst of the worst they're all bad they're all horrible and we're going to pick out one that's the worst of the worst and we're actually posting it to the barstool main to see um and it'll be like an inside joke for you guys and we would just want to see what the comments are they're probably going to be more positive than

like when they post our content when our shit gets posted it is just brutal i don't look i can't help but to ignorance Ignorance is fucking bliss. You know it's happening. It's not bliss because you know it's happening. It's not bliss because I know it's happening. Yeah, it's not ignorance that you know you're getting lampooned. So be it. Like a gecko.

What? Wasn't the popular sports drink Sobe? That wasn't a sports drink. That was just like a... Like a juice? It was like a lemonade competitor. It was the same vein as... Sobe?

What was the... Yeah, I think Sobe was rivaling vitamin water. What was the logo or the mascot? It was a lizard. What type? Not a gecko. I don't think it wasn't like a Komodo dragon. No, that was way too big. It was like a common lizard that you'd find in... Like a gecko. It was't a gecko it wasn't like a komodo dragon no that was way too big it

was like a common lizard that you'd find in like a gecko it was something that you'd find no which is a derivative of because so be so when you stands for south beach you said so be it so i said so be it like a gecko which is also a callback to last week when I made the gecko joke. That wasn't a joke. You just said the word gecko. No, it wasn't a joke. Very good. Very good. Yep.

All right. I want to see somebody in the wild. So be it. Like a gecko. Oh, that was good. Like a Dade County transplant. you always talk about like fucking how about owen uh well yeah you always talk about fucking the girls that i am attracted to what about guy code guy cope um guy code like i just bought insurance god damn it it's a gecko. Oh. Fuck you, dude.

It's all right. Yeah, I bet. Anyways, what were you saying? Remember, how about Owen missexualizing the most obvious gay man in the world, maybe? We were on the Tico 10, and this guy... Repetitively.

This guy had... So Tico had a guy in her posse. Marilyn Monroe, Diamond Pearson. She met him from New York time, from Fashion Week. Yes, he was her stylist or something. And he's like a professional choreographer. But no, he said you could hire me to dance for you, which

could mean anything. And then he just started dropping it low. And then he was talking about going to like Miami. And Owen's like, wait, with your boyfriend? No, he says, we're talking about seeing the Batman movie. He said specifically I took my partner, me and my date, they went to the Batman with me.

And then he was like, we loved it. And we're hitting it off now. This guy's like the gayest guy. I said, make sure to cherish her. Yeah, you said, make sure to cherish her. No, you said something about... No, it was about the Batman. You were like, did she like it?

Yeah, you kept saying it. And he was like, what? What, honey? And you kept saying, did she like it? And I'm like... Oh, audible, audible. Did she? Did she?

Audible, audible. Now, hear me out. I can't do it the other way around. Yeah, you're right. You're right. Though you couldn't have said... Because if it's just like a feminine man that... No, there was no mistake in this guy.

There really wasn't at all. There was no mistake in... So I'm gay. Are you? I don't know. Yeah, I guess you wouldn't know. Sheesh. He had an incredible line, thoughen on tico 10 what'd he say it'll be funnier than anything we say okay what was it

all right we took a small break uh we're here with o'malley now you are lingering in the hallway actually we opened the door and your ear was pressed to the door weird weird of you first woman we've had on the show no shit no first funny woman we've had on the show

I'll take it yeah women aren't funny you said it you have been listening in on all of our shows ear to the door yeah you fit in well that's weird

a stethoscope I never learned how to read a tethoscope in on all of our shows. Ear to the door. That's weird. A stethoscope? I never learned how to read. She said a tethoscope. I don't even know what she confused that with. A confusing tether ball with medical... A tethoscope. Your co-host Brianna

got two new breasts. Both of them. Both. The duo. Left and them. Both. The duo. Yeah. Left and right. We were the duo. Now that's kind of her duo now. That's her thing. Yeah, I get it. Yeah, so that's her new co-hosts. That sucks. Yeah, it does. So we have a pitch.

Getting new boobs is kind of a flex. Yeah. Historically. This is your body. You you can choose have you thought about it i i can choose yeah i'll let you um i uh i already got banging ass tits okay okay get a third that's what we're yeah have you thought about because like imagine flexing three titty money. 3TM? 3TM? Yeah. So she got third titty money.

Oh, she got a third titty money. And that's hard. What if it goes on the back? It could. It could. But I think there's something fun. That would be awesome. And like your dolphin impression in the pool.

That would be hilarious with your titty sticking out. Or jaws. No, it's the float. They're saying double D. You could use it like a speed bag during doggy style. You're just transcribing double D. My boy's getting jumped. I hit him with one in the front, one in the front, and then the other one in the back.

Or you go three in the front, and instead of two truths and a lie, it's two fakes and a real. And you can't use your hands to guess. Now that's foreplay. That's three play. If we're talking foreplay, I mean, come on. That's another podcast. I don't know.

If we crowdsource third titty money, will you get a third tit? Oh, 1,000%. All right, yeah. All right, I guess that's the fucking show. I mean, you guys got your bits.

That'll be my bit. That'll be your tit. That's right on a platter for you. Right in your face. Shit. Okay. Yeah, awesome. I appreciate it.

No, stay. Stick around a. Awesome. I appreciate it. Stick around a little bit. Yuck it up with us. What do you want to talk about? You guys have been doing college tours. KB's dream. Lots of young girls. Would they like Kyle? They might like KB, maybe not Kyle.

A little look behind the curtain. Not so weird off camera, is he? Yeah. I'm not sure. I don't know. Yeah, he is. He's worse. Yeah.

That is like, you guys have the best life in the world. I mean, you probably don't make any money, but Brianna. Brianna has the best life in the world. She's got it made. like any money but brianna brianna has the best life i was like i don't think there's a there's a position that would be more ideal than her life i mean for her age yeah i mean i get the i get the i get to run around with her but really happy though quite literally no she's fucking so sad as well as i for real i mean all that glitters is not gold. $23 in the bank account, my boys. You got Santander?

Yeah, I got Santander. You do not have third titty money. I do not. Damn. That is. We're gonna have to out-choice that. You hardly have one titty money. You might have to sell a titty. I might have to go inverted on that. Oh, no. Fucker. Dude, did you hear about O'Malley? She had to sell her titty.

Damn. What's your Venmo cash app? Dude, did you hear about O'Malley? She had to sell her titty. What's your Venmo cash app? This is a social experiment to prove how uninfluential we are. So it's not Nicholas Teraney. It's evaporated by a hyphen. It's not KB, not Swag, it's not Owen-Roder. I don't know what it is.

Like Grace K. O'Malley, probably. What's the K for? How the fuck can you know? What's your Venmo? Cunt. Hell yeah. Hell yeah, it is. I almost said clan.

Good thing I didn't. No, you could have. No. No, you could have. Nope. Okay. Remember the friend zone era? Of your life?

No. Hello. That wasn't even a thing until like social media came i thought you're talking about central perk oh oh my god i'm dominating this episode nice oh no what friend zone were you talking about little guy all right you still gotta play the game it's like when shack put up like 16 kobe had 81 kobe had quiet double doubles 10 and 11 rip fair enough yeah that was a thing any girl you weren't fucking you were in her no then like that became a thing and now then it became we were all universally shamed and to be like we cannot

be in the friend zone yeah so we had this like notion that like you either had to you either were a gay pussy or you fucked and came into every girl in your social circle there was no one it was like you could not not be fucking a girl that you were friends with you and you could only cream pie you're right only cream pie yeah so i was so like which which one is it it was like rival gangs the gay pussies and the the cream pies they would snap at each other in the alleyway yeah like that was yeah that sucked damn i'm sorry i love that like just friendship with another person would be kind of like shade. Like, friend zone was, like, the ultimate sign of a, like.

A beta. Not just a bitch or a, or a. Just a fucking coward. I don't know. It was just, like, you can't do that. Yeah. God damn. Yeah, your friend's clowning you because a girl likes your personality.

But won't give her your hole yeah damn yeah and i was that was it wasn't me it was girls were protective of their hole and they would just i don't know but aren't girls just a hole anyways multiple a whole lot of trouble boy oh boy yeah they're the worst. Shit. Should you want me to go on that note? No, I don't. I'd love to stay and chat. Yeah, let's talk.

What do you want to talk about? Owen will cut out all this dead air. And people at home, the fucking fools in their fucking wage cages. Idi to be they're going to be thinking that we're firing on all cylinders. We go for like four or five hours. And then put out like about a 15 minute pod. What's your next? What was the shortest pod we've ever put out? I think it was like 11 minutes.

And we were. Yeah. And we were trying. It was like right when we got started. We suck now. We thought it was like avant garde. Yeah. Yeah. Like an 070 shake

song and we're like yeah this is they're gonna be like they're gonna be playing this in ireland pub yeah like yeah they're just like that's the thing like we're gonna get multiple plays from multiple the same people we were like lying to ourselves because like they're gonna miss some of the jokes yeah we're gonna pack this with seven minutes of punch, punch, punch, punch, punch, punch, punch. Fair enough. But you could only get 11 minutes in. Well, people just listen once. We're like, I didn't get it.

Didn't get it. No, that's fair. That's fair. They're like, that was short. Feel ripped off. Ripped off. Didn't get it too short. Well, if they thought it was a song,

then that would have been long. We also had like five ads that episode. A lot of the criticism was like, it wasn't good, but it was way too short. They're like like the criticism was like it was it wasn't good but it was way too short they're like i don't know what you want yeah this was fucking horrible it's so short why so short it was bad i didn't like it that much that's the first time that complaint has ever come out of somebody like when you're in a bad movie you want it to end i remember i was like staying up all night i was like what is like what how do you do this yeah they want longer but i don't know

funnier and then i remember we'd like meet at like fucking cafes and we'd like write out what we wanted to talk about then we'd ask owen like how long was that he's like that was like four and a half minutes also let's like um start from the top because i didn't like the way i inflected that punch line and we can redo it yeah yeah you love starting from the top starting from the top yeah what's uh the anti-drake what's the prep like on your show you guys just come in and go uh we get hammered you guys have been on opiates on your show i think yeah it's been i've had to put it on like time six speed yeah we're uh we're we're in a bad stage of life right now yeah i bet but it isn't entertaining for some people

uh are you still doing stand-up uh no gave it up for lunch for real yeah okay bet it was too it was uh it was going too good yeah so i had a i So I had to give it to God for a minute. That's the thing. I've had this issue. You have. Kyle watched it happen to me, getting too popular too quickly. And, I mean, you just have to step back. Especially when you're riding a coattail.

Tell me. Tell me about it. Tell me about it. It's hard. Yeah. You and I both. Yeah. Look at us. Look at us. It is hard. Yeah. You and I both. Yeah. Look at us.

Look at us. Look at us. Yep. I get you, man. Yeah. It's just you have to have it in. I'm going to get it. You have to have it in.

Tell me your story. Yeah. Tell us the real you. Tell me your story. Why don't you take this mask off? You can start from the top. Start from the top. From like the beginning.

Let's get some tears. Did you go to college? Community. Doesn't that make sense? Did you finish? Nope. How far into community college? I actually, I did two years of community and then I transferred to four year.

None of that's fun, but I didn't finish because I saw, my eye was on the prize. Brianna. Yep. I said, this girl is going to go somewhere. Yeah. I dropped out of school before anything. This is before or after she started a barstool? Before even, before any of it.

I just said, this girl's got that. Before she even had a TikTok? Before she had a TikTok. She was just making home cooking videos. Brie? Brie Brie. Brie Brie? Yeah.

And so when did you realize she was your Michael Orr? Michael Orr. See, that's a misreference on my part. Michael Orr was portrayed to be a mentally challenged Goliath. He was an NFL star whose legacy is being like a literate poor boy. Here comes Sandra Bullock to save you. Yeah, I was her white savior yeah and i came right in and swooped her underneath and um ever since like look where

like look where i brought her you guys are going around the country doing tours sold out thousands of fans getting wasted partying as a job like and you're like you guys are so dis like discontent And you're like, you guys are so discontent. You're miserable. So that just proves that happiness isn't real? Not real. Nothing's real. You know how like you see.

Do you believe in love? Oh God, no. Okay. No. Do you? Guy like me? Do you? Yes.

Kyle. But it has to be unconditionally. It's like it's binary. It's either unconditional love or nothing you've always said that man you ever have it or you don't you won't eat pussy though the i would argue the inverse you too much pussy you won't stop you won't stop i won't Kyle, come up and fuck me. Kyle's like making out with her and pushes his own head. All right, fine. Fucking starving.

It's not a hunger thing. Kyle's giving like reverse road head. He's driving, has his face down in a cooter banking on GPS feet till turn he's feeding her pineapple trulies all night that's I don't eat pussy and that's the worst part about me looking exactly like

every lesbian because they just assume that I fucking a lot of lesbians no I just look like well yes you have your ex-girlfriends are not lesbian yeah but they weren't that's the thing i don't know the time of transition um i know i was in it i know i was in it when they realized they didn't i don't even this is too real i didn't know that we did a podcast episode on it

I don't even want to. This is too real. I didn't know that. We did a podcast episode on it. They're really cool with you, though. Yeah. Oh, you guys dap each other up after? They asked me for gambling tips. They asked me.

That's a red flag. Yeah. My seventh grade girlfriend is a lesbian now. Really? Do you think you did it? Probably not. But her... Mr. Confident. Okay. Definitely not. really do you think he did it probably not but um her mr confident okay i didn't i don't even think i hugged her um but her girlfriend became a boy so now she's straight again so now's your time

i don't know maybe swoop on in santa book style yeah right. A blind saw. I've never had one before. A what? A cock? That was my impression of both Michael Orr and Sandra Bullock combined. That was fair. People say my voice sounds like the exact split of those two. Scientifically,

yeah. You told me once, and I actually think about about at least once a week that my accent is absolute trash garbage to listen to i didn't say that what was it uh probably just yucky yeah it's general it's disgusting i think the word was yeah and it's something you can't change oh i definitely could but i think it's comforting doesn't make people longer like i think you're a success story. Yeah, like white trash from Boston. Like I have this voice and I'm going to talk for a living.

You know? That's like the reverse of you have a face for radio. Yeah, it is. You have a voice for deafness. For papyrus. You have a voice for typing. Hieroglyphics. Why don't you go ahead and start doing telegramsics a voice for Mavis Beacon

it was like a typing program I'll just start writing books I guess yeah but I can't read no Nick Fasoli who we work with he can't read but he can write so like he has to like he has to take our texts and then write them to understand what that they are he cannot read he's not i guess illiterate by definition it's like semi-illiterate he cannot

read though but he can write he can write so he has he has to write what we say. Or if there's a book or article he wants to read, he has to print it out and copy the letters, trace them, and then read it. Yeah, it's shocking. Well, he can't read. He can't read. No. He can only read as he's writing.

He looks around the food store with a marble notebook. It's very sad. Yes. I'll make sure to write him a letter. Why? No, he has to write it. Yeah, he has to write himself a letter. I'll double it up. I'll put it in braille. True. Sorry. And then Duggs in the office

complimented somebody's writing and I think he was just being literal because he can't read. He was just complimenting the shape of the cursive. I fucking love your writing. The physical look of it that lower case r look at that curve

wow he likes my writing he just wants to fuck that squiggle yeah my god oh my god he said he liked my writing yeah it's pretty aww aw oh man alright

shout out to Carabas you're not allowed to do that bro what now I have to work late and cut that okay at least say sorry Saugus

I'm good that's not good at all Sorry. Saugus. I'm good. That's not good at all. That's so good. Oh, you don't miss. Name a lizard. Name a lizard? Yes. Type.

Fucking. You're like nervous. My hands are sweating. Name a lizard. Reptile. You struck me as someone who was just going to say Hillary right off the bat. Yeah, I guess

she's right. Reptiles are lizards. No. Yeah, lizards are both amphibians. That's not a correct answer to name a lizard. So why don't you name a lizard? First lizard that comes to brain. Like a Rorschach test. Brain broke.

Brain on some other shit. Yeah. One lizard. Should we start easier? Slip back into that rap. Name a color. Brain. Name a color.

Red. Name a rapper. Lil Dicky. Name a state. Red. Okay. Name a rapper. Lil Dicky. Name a state. Kansas. Name a lizard. God damn it. What are you guys getting at with lizards?

Name a body part. Arm. Name a horse breed. Nay. See, the brain's broken. When it comes to animals and lizards there's tons of lizards nay iguana alligator crocodile minotaur lizard there's jesus christ lizards that run on water a newt salamander learning

ah i accidentally said gargoyle with the emphasis on the wrong g the other day and i said gargoyle and everybody was clowning the fuck out of me like this dude just said gargoyle that was that destroyed my day because like it was like a record scratch and you were just like smirked you were like what the fuck did you just say it's like i said gargoyle and you're like not quite someone even like called you out on twitter and they put like parentheses around this dude said gargoyle and he put the second g in brackets and i dm'd him on the side i was like i love the fact that you're roasting him for that but you could have just capitalized yeah the second g to show emphasis on that no it's a new wave gargoyle yeah you sound like a vampire all All right. That's fun to say.

Do you have a brain parasite? Yeah, for real? If you saw Dr. Phil, would you tell him he's bald? I'd probably pat him on the bald. So you and Bree are a study that, like, doctors don't know if binge drinking every single fucking day and not sleeping ever and only staying awake because of Adderall and probably cocaine, they're going to see if that's bad for you. You're like the test subject.

You're on the preliminary trial stage. Because they have no idea what the results may be. I hope they reach out. Yeah, yeah. I'd love to see what's going on up there. Yeah. Full blown up. There can't be any bad things.

No. I mean, I don't even partake in any of the things you're saying. For real? For real? Yes. I'm clean sober. Okay. I'm dead sober.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't drink. All right. Well, we're really concerned. Episode 182. 282. Yeah? Yep.

Cool. Thank you. All right. Anything to plug? Oh, yeah. Cool. Anything to plug? Hell yeah.

Kyle's got something to plug. His asshole. Gets him every time. On account of you like the sensation of your asshole. Hold on. Never mind. Bro, just keep thinking. I'm rolling.

Just keep thinking. You got me? You got me? Tell them you're not gay. Anything you're working on? You. Oh, me? Yeah.

Working on getting sober. Yeah? It's not working. Yeah, okay. And then, this is not the crossover. What? They're going to go listen to Plan B.

Probably. Ain't no fucking way. Probably. Ain't no fucking way, my boy. Well, is it uncut? Let's test that. Because our homies love uncut. My boy Kyle.

Hold on. No, no, no. Wait a minute. What? Did somebody say uncut? You my homie kyle likes uncut because you've stopped so straight i don't want my i want my dick you want more dick to be i want to be cut like veiled why are you staring at owen when you say that i'm not yeah you were don't call me out why this is your show don't call me out on idiosyncrasies stupid and that's on me and

i'm sorry thanks for having me yeah well yeah you're welcome back anytime as long as we're cool with it that's fair cool so i'll never see you guys oh you were great yeah sure no it's nice because you need you forget you're getting a third breast oh yeah that's huge i'm so pumped yeah how much do we need to raise i think so two of them we're not getting you an expensive one third breast. That's huge. I'm so pumped. How much do we need to raise? We're not getting you an expensive one. We're getting you base model. Yeah, let's go to like... No bells or whistles.

Yeah, like the Brazil or something. I want Google cheapest titty. Cheapest titty. Just one. And if doctors won't do one, we'll just titty no there's got to be a doctor 3,500 all right we raised three all right talk to miami one titty please just like you're sliding 3,500 one titty please wait a second spectrum wi-fi is doing it for

2,300 no shit ain't no way this is gonna be huge that's like the saddest thing like two will be huge and i think one it's like a sad dirty girl can only afford one titty just one please yeah i'm gonna get the left i'm gonna come back for the right later just smack it right in the middle for me yeah i think there were a lot the for it to be arousing the reliance is on the position of the on the body so like for example if like a perfect breast was on like the the shoulder blade or even lower like on the the thigh i don't think it would be a turn on or if like a pair was definitely not yeah you're just talking about like a deformity right exactly like if a pair of perfect but like what if the perfect breasts were there Definitely not. You're just talking about a deformity. Right, exactly.

So you would have a fucking head cap? But what if the perfect breasts were there, but there was also a thigh titty? Exactly. I don't think I would be turned on by the thigh titty. At that point, it's just a pinpoint. What if we could make the ass cheeks titties? You could. That's been done.

Has it? Yeah, I think so. They've done it. I mean, the tits are just, the ass is just nippleless tits. That's a perspective. Most things are nippleless tits. Fair. Throw a nipple on something and it becomes a tit.

Ain't that right? I think so. Kyle? I was telling him about how the Rorschach guy was unlike most of his counterparts he was actually lived up to the hotness that he

Inkblot test? The guy that invented the Inkblot is very hot What? I was holding up like a paper with Inkblot and you were going to see your parents splitting up Oh, you went through one of those too? No Just read it on you It is very obvious with inkblot and you were going to see your parents splitting up? Oh, you went through one of those too? No. Just read it on you.

It is very obvious that you come from a shattered home. And it was during formative years. Yeah, yeah. It was a very important time. What is it, 7th grade? And they all laughed at me. Yeah. Your parents fought over who got to tell you Santa isn't real.

They couldn't wait. You got it twice. My evil grandma gave me a double whammy. You have an evil grandma? Oh my God, yeah. No way. What makes her evil? Irish women are despicable.

Does she spell her name disgustingly? Maryhen. Oh, okay. Is there a G in there? There's definitely a silent H. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, you're people are... Piss poor. Old women veil their evil under a fear of God or something. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Old women are significantly scarier than old men. Mm-hmm. Do old men lose their minds earlier?

They always seem out of it quicker. I think if society lets you be kooky, you just become kooky faster. Society. These old men, they be kooky. Yeah, for sure, for sure, for sure. We'll clip that. That's a good social one to run.

Yeah, that was hilarious. We gotta start posting one second clips. Yeah. Did O hilarious. We got to start posting like one second clips. Yeah. Did O'Malley preach here? Old men do be kooky. Say it again. I want to try one second clips for promo.

I don't know why that priest did that to me. That was good. That's too cerebral. Just say old men. Kooky. Yeah, something. Kyle, do a noise. Somebody can say you left no crumbs. Watch this. Just say, oh, cookie. Yeah, something. Kyle, do a noise.

You left no crumbs. Watch this. This will be a good clip. Now I'm on the spot. No, go ahead. Do your jester noise. Now I'm on the spot. Oh, come on.

This goes to show how calculated my sounds are. It's not an improvisation. You have to start prepping your body beforehand. These past 10 minutes are going to be their Hall of Fame. Is that your reply to what I'm going to say? No, you're just going to say, like, no, that's a new untold story. Hey, is that story old or told? Fuck no, baby!

It's a new untold story. A new untold story. It's a fresh, big untold story. A new untold story. I knew I told you